New Year, New You by Janet Boyer by Janet Boyer - Read Online

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New Year, New You - Janet Boyer

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Introduction

I’m often asked:

How do you do all that you do?

How are you so productive and creative?

How have you accomplished so much in the last decade?

How did you survive widowhood when your first husband died of leukemia?

How did you survive (and thrive) after your son’s Autism diagnosis?

How did you homeschool for a decade—and end up publishing several books (and over a dozen eBooks) in the meantime?

You and your second husband have been married for over 17 years—and it’s obvious you’re so in love (and best friends, too). Not to mention that you’ve collaborated on several art endeavors. How do you do it?

You always seem to bounce back from adversity—returning stronger and better (much like the mythological Phoenix). How is this possible, given the numerous professional setbacks you’ve experienced?

How did you deal with your crisis of faith—including leaving full-time pastoral ministry and traditional Christianity?

How do you stay so inspired, passionate, positive and productive—year after year after year?

I usually answer with a simple (maybe even trite) response—only because it’s taken me over twenty years to get where I am today. (I’m 44, but over half that time has been spent in deep contemplation, self-examination, exhaustive study and, for a short time in college, therapy).

There is no single easy recipe, simple spiritual truth, existential band-aid or magical pill.

Rather, it’s been a long, winding personal journey filled with devastation and delight, tragedy and triumph, loss and achievement, rejection and love. And along the way—thanks to theological training (and unlearning), pastoral experience, personal excavation, ruthless self-inquiry, diligent study and brutal honesty—I’ve discovered how to live a (mostly) fearless live full of courage, authenticity, enthusiasm, openness, wonderment, joy and inspired creativity.

In my newest eBook, New Year, New You, I share most (if not all) of my hard-won wisdom that has led to a fulfilling, resilient, productive and harmonious life. This book is for you if:

— You feel like you’re not living up to your potential

— You wonder why you’re here…and if you matter

— You are emotionally stuck and want to move on

— You crave a more authentic, purposeful life filled with meaning

— You’re tired of playing small, timid and dim

— You’re stressed to the max…and want to know how to de-stress

— You’re struggling with bitterness and unforgiveness

— You want to know your personal strengths and patterns

— You long to know how to tell yourself empowering stories about life

— You seek peace, balance and harmony

— You aspire to grow as a person

— You’ve suffered a setback and don’t know how to get back up

— You’ve been abused, marginalized, ignored and/or rejected

— You want to understand your mate, children, parents and friends

— You’re confused about what you value—and want clarity now

— You desire to understand the world of spirit, energy and cause/effect

It is my hope that New Year, New You brings you peace, balance and harmony.

Peace, Balance and Harmony

One of the definitions of peace is inner contentment and serenity. Another definition is the absence of war or other hostilities. The information and tools that you’ll find in this eBook will help you make peace between yourself, your

mind, your body, other individuals and your environment. In order to reduce the wear and tear of everyday hostilities, however, once must have balance. While the word balance can mean emotional and mental stability, it also means the equaling out of opposing forces. When a situation, relationship or attitude threatens our sense of peace, we can bring something to the table to counter it. As Wayne Dyer puts it, "There is a spiritual solution to every problem." For me, this means that for every difficulty, there is a solution to help neutralize the source of the problem.

To complete the circle, we have the word harmony. One definition of this word is congruity of parts with one another and with the whole.

Modern living has become quite complex and stressful. Technology and gadgets meant to simplify our life seem to have the reverse effect of adding more to our proverbial plate. Many feel like jugglers in a post-modern circus—trying to balance family, work and health in the midst of financial uncertainty. These are not easy times for most people.

The good news is that there are practical ways to get back your personal power. What is personal power? Imagine that every individual is given 100 units of energy, every day, to do with as they wish. How you spend that energy—or allow circumstances and people to spend for you—determines the quality of your internal life. Ultimately, your outer life reflects your internal life. If you believe everyone is out to get you, for example, that belief will manifest in all your relationships. Now what if this daily energy allotment is spent on the past—nursing grudges and slights (real or perceived)? How can an individual be fully present and balanced in their life if over half of their energy is in the past? Or what about worrying about what you’ll do next hour, next day, next month? If you spend your vital life force energy in the future, you have less to work with for the very real demands of your every day life.

The live in the present moment teaching has gained popularity over the last two decades as individuals and researchers realize what great spiritual teachers and mystics have declared for years: the point of personal power is in the present moment—because now is all we really have. Energy stuck in the past or future is like a hook dragging your energy everywhere but where it needs to be: the here and now. If you are not fully here, are you really living? Are you really experiencing all you can in this life? Are you spending your daily energy units wisely?

The New Year, New You eBook will show you how you can get your own power back—and retrieve your precious life force from attitudes, beliefs and habits that keep you stuck in the past and future. You’ll also find practical ways to bring balance and harmony to your mind, emotions, spirit, relationships, environment, and physical body. Cutting edge research on sleep, optimism, exercise, stress, and other topics will be covered, showing you the science behind balanced and harmonious living. And perhaps most importantly, you’ll find out why you behave and think as you do—realizing that your unique personality reflects a sacred, empowering signature for purposeful living and self-defined success.

Chapter 1: Know Thyself

It can be difficult to discover personal meaning and purpose when we don't zoom out to get a big picture of the patterns and symbols in our life. One way we can discover the patterns and purposes of our life is by discerning prevalent Archetypes and symbols.

Archetypes

What is an Archetype? An Archetype is a template or original pattern from which copies are made. Psychologist Carl Jung, author/mythologist Joseph Campbell, storyteller/author Clarissa Pinkola Estes, author Caroline Myss, author Carol S. Pearson, psychologist Jean Shinonda-Bolen and others are among those that have brought the concept of Archetypes into our consciousness.

To break it down in practical, everyday terms, Archetypes are patterns that are universally recognized. We see Archetypes in myths, fairy tales, literature and movies. Think about your own life. Which types of movies do you like? Do you consistently cast yourself in the Hero role? The Underdog or Victim? The Detective? What about the Warrior, Princess or Femme Fatale? Or maybe Lover or Mystic?

Do any of the characters you play interact consistently with others? Do you find that you clash with Victims, for example, and wish they'd stop whining? Do you want to kick them? Are you a Bully? (Coward?) Do you seek to rescue them (Rescuer)? Empower them (Liberator)? Comfort them (Mother)? Educate them (Teacher)?

Many Archetypes dance with one another. Advocates are often paired with Victims, Knights with Damsels, Students with Teachers, Mother/Father with Child, etc. These Archetypal dramas play out repeatedly, whether we are conscious of it or not. The benefit of becoming conscious of these energies is that we find ourselves entering an awareness of what animates us and the kind of relationships we are drawn to. Animation is usually an emotional reaction of either enthusiastic affinity or extreme distaste.

When we are able to identify these energies, we can step back and begin to see the forest for the trees. That is, we can see the patterns in our life and in others, instead of viewing everything so personally. In recognizing these patterns, we become more conscious, and when we become more conscious, we then have choice. There is no choice without awareness. This is why many Archetypal dramas in relationships have identifiable repeating patterns, even with different partners: there is no awareness of what energies we our using, our motivations or the Archetypal dynamics of our relationships to others and the world.

Archetypes are neither good nor bad, despite the reputation of some. Each one can strengthen, protect and help fulfill our soul's curriculum we designed before incarnation. For example, the Prostitute archetype sounds quite negative. Yet, when we are aware of this particular pattern, we become empowered—refusing to sell out for survival, security or approval.

There are light and shadow dynamics connected to every archetype. However, they do not correlate to good/bad or positive/negative. Rather, the light areas of an archetype are the ones we recognized and readily embrace. The shadow areas of an archetype are the ones we project onto others. This projection can both be in the form of adulation and hero-worship or in the form of demonization and judgment. Either way, to project an archetypal pattern to another is, in some way, not to own it. In fact, it’s often called a disowned shadow, or part of us.

Carl Jung believed that archetypes reside in the collective unconscious, which is why they are universally recognized and contained, to a greater or lesser degree, within the psyche of every person. Jung asserted that when an individual over-identifies with an archetype—to the point of almost becoming possessed by a pattern—psychosis results.

Another way we can see our life symbolically is to examine symbols that surround us. What animals, trees or objects do you identify with? List as many qualities you can about them. Are there any correlations to your life, personality or interactions with others? What are you good at? What is your bliss? If you could turn into a character or Archetype, which would it be? What do you collect? Do certain symbols crop up in your dreams?

Disciplines such as astrology, Tarot and personality models all contain archetypal patterns. For example, in Celtic astrology, archetypal patterns are correlated with tree spirits and their personalities. In Chinese astrology, archetypal patterns are correlated with 12 different animals who display certain hallmark traits. The Major Arcana of the Tarot features 22 developmental archetypal patterns such as Fool, Magician, Empress and Hermit. In the Enneagram, there are 9 Types which manifest specific archetypal patterns. A Type 7 often manifests the Hedonist and Renaissance Person pattern, while a Type 9 often manifests the Peacemaker or Diplomat archetype. In the ANSIR system, the 14 Style Bosses are named for their archetypal behaviors, with monikers such as Visionary, Empath and Healer. David Keirsey has categorized humanity into four temperaments which contain four variants each (16 total). For example, The Idealist temperament (NF) includes Champions, Healers, Counselors and Teachers.

Guidance and information is all around you in the form of Archetypal energy patterns and symbols. Insight is transmitting like a radio signal on a specific frequency. Learning to see ourselves and our lives symbolically sharpens our ability to see these patterns, and injects greater meaning and purpose into our lives. It also helps us discover areas where we are asleep. When we awaken to the parts we and others are playing in this drama called life, we become more flexible and skilled at making conscious choices for our highest good.

Caroline Myss notes: Archetypes are imperatives, demanding that we give them expression.

In this case, multiple personalities are