Lucy's Journey

Lucy’s Journey

Based on a True Story

By Patsy Whittle

Copyright 2015 Patsy Whittle

Smashwords Edition

Smashwords Edition License Notes

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Cover photo: Lucy 1949

©2015 Patsy Whittle. The author retains sole copyright to her contributions to this book.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION

DEDICATION

PROLOGUE

CHAPTER 1

CHAPTER 2

CHAPTER 3

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 5

CHAPTER 6

CHAPTER 7

CHAPTER 8

CHAPTER 9

CHAPTER 10

CHAPTER 11

CHAPTER 12

CHAPTER 13

CHAPTER 14

CHAPTER 15

CHAPTER 16

CHAPTER 17

CHAPTER 18

CHAPTER 19

CHAPTER 20

CHAPTER 21

CHAPTER 22

Introduction

This is the story of one woman's journey through life and, of her strength and courage to go on. A journey filled with hardship, pain, and suffering. Fighting anxiety disorder and the fear of losing control, Lucy has to make some difficult decisions, decisions that will affect her for the rest of her life.

Dedication

For Marina, Evelyn, and Shirley

Prologue

My mother Lucy kissed me and put her arms around me. I could see the tears running down her face. She looked so fragile standing there; I wanted to take her with us. We were standing on her front porch in the beautiful fishing town of Ferryland, Newfoundland. My two little girls were waiting by my side. It was a foggy evening; I couldn’t see my car sitting in the driveway a few feet away. We had just spent a few days with mom before we left Newfoundland. It was hard to say goodbye, and my heart felt like it would break in two. This was the moment I’d been dreading over the past few days.

When will I see you again Patsy? My mother said.

I’ll be home again soon for a visit Mom, I replied. With those words still sliding over my lips, I hurried down the steps and got into the car that would take me four thousand miles away from her. I had to get away fast or I wouldn’t be able to see the road through my tears.

I love you, Patsy, she called after me through the thick night air. Take care of yourself.

I love you Mom, I said.

The years came and went, and I never made it back home. Always too busy with work, raising the children, and keeping myself one step ahead in the

busy life of a single mom. Every year I kept putting off that visit to go home.

***

Thirty-three years later, in Coquitlam, BC, I checked my voicemail while out for my daily walk. There was a message from my brother in Newfoundland.

Patsy, Can you call home? I need to talk to you. I heard my brother's frantic voice on the answering service.

Instinct told me right away there was something wrong with mom. The last time I talked to her she was doing fine. She wasn’t sick, just the aches and pains of growing old. She had entered a nursing home four years earlier. It had taken her a while to adjust, but she was doing well. She had moments when she longed to be in Ferryland in her old house. We’d talked about it so often over the past two years.

I'm going back to Ferryland one day. Mom would say.

Maybe, I should leave BC, and come back home, and take care of you, I replied.

Hi Angelo, what's going on, is mom sick? I yelled into the phone over the loud noise of the traffic.

Mother's not doing well, she's in the hospital, he said. She was having trouble breathing. We took her to the hospital, and the doctors wanted to keep her there for a few days. You should come home and see her right away.

For the rest of my walk I was in a daze. Everything was going through my mind at once. I had just talked to mom a few days ago, and she was doing fine. She told me my brother Phillip and his family took her to the Swiss Chalet for dinner. She loved it there. It was her favorite place to eat. She always talked about how good her meal was. She even took her leftovers home.

What had gone wrong? Why was she having trouble breathing? I wondered. This was so sudden. I’d already been saving up to go home for a visit and knew we would be together soon. Now, she was sick. I was frightened. I was afraid I would never see her again, and the thought terrified me.

Chapter 1

It was 1945 in St. Bernard's, a small fishing community located near the base of the Burin Peninsula on the east side of Fortune Bay, Newfoundland. Most of the houses in the town sit next to the sea. Rows of boats rocked back and forth in the water, waiting for their owners to board them and go fishing.

Lucy's house was on a hill overlooking the sea. She lived there with her father and mother, her four sisters, and three brothers. Just up from her house Lucy and her closest sister Betty would play when they had a few minutes away from their daily chores. Lucy had just turned seventeen. In those days, the chores of a seventeen-year-old girl were very demanding.

The girls loved to take as much time away from their workload as possible to explore the beauty all around them. They had been high on a hill playing in the snow; making snow angels. They were having so much fun they lost all track of time. It was getting dark. Betty was the first to start running down the hill towards home. Lucy ran after her sister screaming.

Betty, I cut myself. Lucy cried. There's blood all over my stockings, I don't know how it happened?

Betty stared at her sister. She could see the blood soaking through Lucy's stocking and running down the inside of her leg. It covered the fur on top of her boot. Betty knew exactly what was happening to her sister. She had the same thing happen to her a few months ago when she was outside cutting wood for the fire.

What do you mean, you cut yourself? Betty laughed. You didn’t cut anything, you started your period.

My period? Lucy said.

She was standing in shock watching the blood flow over her boot. She didn’t understand what was happening to her. Her mother and no one in her family ever mentioned anything about periods. In those days, no one talked about personal things like your period.

Yes, your period, Betty said. It means you are a woman now, and you can have babies.

The two girls ran down the hill towards home laughing all the way. Lucy wasn’t frightened anymore. She felt proud she was a woman, and she could have babies. As Lucy and Betty got closer to home, they could smell the aroma of their mother’s delicious homemade bread coming from the kitchen.

She loved it when her mother made bread, especially when she fried the leftover dough. Lucy was very hungry by now. She reached the house first. She was in a hurry to get inside. Lucy had trouble pulling the large storm door open because of the snow that had settled at the bottom of it. Betty helped her sister, and after a bit of a struggle, the door opened and they both went inside.

As Lucy rushed off to the bathroom to clean herself, she said a quick hello to her mother. She reached under the cupboard and took out a jug of water. Luckily, there was enough water in it to do the job. She took a cloth from the cabinet and slowly washed the blood off her body. She lined her underwear with a spare washcloth her mother kept on top of the cabinet. She’d have to wait until she was in her room to change her clothes. She felt so strange. This period was so new to her. She didn’t want to tell her mother about it. After all, her mother never mentioned anything to her about periods. For now, she decided to keep it a secret from her.

Lucy came out of the bathroom and sat next to Betty at the kitchen table. The table sat in front of an old black stove. Her mother took the cover off the stove to add wood to the fire. Lucy could see the wood burning inside of it. The heat coming from the stove made her feel warm and toasty. Her cheeks had turned a bright red from being out in the cold for such a long time. Lucy was worried her mother might guess her secret. She looked at Betty and they started laughing.

Why are you laughing? Her mother asked.

It’s nothing, we’re just being silly, Lucy said.

I want you girls to go outside and bring in some wood for the fire. It's going to be a cold night tonight, and we’ll have to keep the fire going all night.

Betty and Lucy went outside to get the wood. It was stacked up high on the woodpile. Large clumps of snow covered the entire length of the wood. Betty stood on an oil barrel her father used for cleaning fish. She took the wood from the top of the pile and threw it on the ground. Lucy picked up the wood and filled her arms up to her neck until she could barely see. Betty jumped down from the barrel, picked up her pile of wood, and they both walked towards the house. When they went inside, their mother was standing by the stove with her arms folded.

Lucy, I need to talk to you, her mother said. Lay the wood behind the stove and come and sit down.

Betty looked at Lucy with a puzzled look on her face. Then, she turned to her mother.

Is Lucy in trouble? She asked.

No, it's nothing like that. I just want to talk to her about a man living over by the harbor. His wife died a few months ago, and he’s looking for a housekeeper. Lucy’s mother said. Someone to care for his children and clean his house while he’s at work.

Lucy, you should go tomorrow and ask him for the job.

Me, Lucy said. Why do I have to go?

Because you’re the best one for the job; you’re good at cleaning and are great with children. I need Betty to stay home to cut wood while your father is away fishing. And besides, we could use the extra money.

Okay Mother, I'll go tomorrow morning and ask the man about the job.

Lucy went to bed that night feeling a little sick to her stomach.

This period is making me feel terrible, she told Betty.

You’ll be fine, Betty said. It’ll be over in a few days. Why don’t you take a few aspirins and go to bed?

Okay, Lucy said as she went to ask her mother for the aspirins. A few minutes later Lucy climbed in bed next to Betty and fell asleep.

The next morning Lucy woke up early. Betty was still asleep. She slipped out of bed quietly so she wouldn’t wake her. She went to the kitchen and heated a pot of water. She took the water to the bathroom and poured it in the washbasin. She washed all over and put on her prettiest dress. When she looked in the mirror and saw how the dress hung over her shapely body, she was very pleased. The dress made her look older than her seventeen years.

Her cheeks were still red from being out in the cold the day before. Lucy’s brown eyes were sparkling with delight. She was feeling so good today. She felt so alive. She tied her long black hair behind her head with a piece of ribbon. She rubbed her lips together so they would turn a darker shade. Today, she was going to see a strange man about a job. She wanted to look her best. She put on her coat and left the house.

Lucy felt nervous as she walked the short distance over to the harbor. It was such a beautiful winter morning. The snow was piled high under her feet. She could hear it crunching as she walked. The sun was shining on her back keeping her warm. As she walked along the road by the sea, the waves were rushing at her. They were almost hitting her boots. The sounds they were making was calming her nerves. She picked up a rock and threw it in the water. The rock rippled over the water before it sunk below. Lucy looked towards the sky and whispered a small prayer. Lord, let everything go well with the meeting today.

When Lucy got to the man's house, she hesitated before knocking on the door. She wanted to look around for a few minutes before she met him. She stood on the step and took a deep breath. Everything looked so beautiful. The house was small but cozy looking. It was painted white with green trimming on the windows. There was a clothesline next to the house. It stretched across the backyard. The house was close to the sea. A long row of steps led from the front of the house to the water’s