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The Flip Side & The Funny Side
The Flip Side & The Funny Side
The Flip Side & The Funny Side
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The Flip Side & The Funny Side

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'The Flip Side & The Funny Side' is a collection of Pam Crane's wittiest poems, a mix of scathing social and political commentary, clever parody, pure fantasy and gentle humour, including three long, imaginative ballads which are complete stories in verse. In these colourful, beautifully crafted stanzas nothing and no-one is immune - God, USA, humanity, government, age, dogs, spelling, ambition, aliens, transport, media, medicine and famous poets.

LanguageEnglish
PublisherPam Crane
Release dateMay 22, 2017
ISBN9781370354771
The Flip Side & The Funny Side
Author

Pam Crane

Pam Crane has been a poet since she was seven years old; it was only when she joined her local Writers' Club that she found she could also write short stories. She has also been a Christian astrologer for most of her life, is well known in that community, and is the author of two books plus many articles in the Astrological Association Journal (for which she compiles the regular Cryptic Crossword.) You can find her website at http://revpamcrane.weebly.com.

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    Book preview

    The Flip Side & The Funny Side - Pam Crane

    THE FLIP SIDE

    & the Funny Side

    Poems by Pam Crane

    Published by Shoestring at Smashwords

    Copyright 2017 Pam Crane

    Smashwords Edition, License Notes:

    Thank you for downloading this free ebook.

    Although it is a free book, it remains the copyrighted property of the author, and therefore may not be reproduced, copied and distributed for commercial or non-commercial purposes. If you enjoyed this book, please encourage your friends to download their own copy at Smashwords.com, where they can also discover other works by this author. Thank you for your support.

    <><><>Forward to Index of Poems<><><>

    THE MISTAKE

    All people that on Earth do dwell

    Have made themselves a living hell.

    Hence the admission I must make:

    Creating them was my mistake.

    I made an error once before -

    I bred the dreadful dinosaur;

    I thought my dragons would be fun

    With scales that glittered in the sun;

    With mighty bodies, tiny brains

    They fought and foraged on the plains

    And some with feathers learned to fly

    Through Gaia’s prehistoric sky.

    But after millions of years

    With nothing much between the ears

    And only fit to be destroyed

    I zapped them with an asteroid.

    Began again. I made an Ape.

    A bigger head, a better shape.

    They seemed to know that I was there,

    And soon were swarming everywhere.

    Come on! I said, "Be more like me!

    I’m hungry for your company!"

    We painted caverns in Lascaux,

    I breathed on Michelangelo;

    Their voices overflowed with words

    And music richer than the birds.

    They made so many, many things,

    They filled the sky with metal wings,

    Their cities with expensive light

    No longer wanting sleep at night.

    They went from slates and scrolls and prayer

    To sending pictures through the air,

    From foot and horse and sailing ship

    To travel by computer chip.

    Now they are choking in their cars,

    Their litter orbiting the stars.

    Too late to save the forest trees,

    Too late for fish and manatees,

    Too late to stop the melting poles,

    To re-establish gender roles,

    Too late to stop them wanting more,

    To halt inevitable war.

    I visited ... I will again,

    Disguised as ordinary men.

    But will they listen? Not a chance.

    I won’t get a second glance

    On local hustings, on TV;

    No-one now believes in me -

    Or even in the smart machines

    That model on dramatic screens

    The choices and their urgency

    That now besiege humanity.

    They hear the scientists’ advice

    But carry on. And pay the price.

    Yet, if they want to have their cake

    And eat it, this is my mistake.

    I said, ‘Go forth and multiply!’

    Now half will freeze and half will fry,

    These billions struggling to be

    Immortal and a match for me.

    Amid the greed, amid the waste,

    My dereliction must be faced;

    I let the species dominate

    And sealed the

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