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Foreword
My migraine adventure
began sometime in late 2007. I don't know how long the migraine had persisted before I realized it wasn't going away, but at some point I decided to see a doctor. At the time, I never considered I might be suffering from a migraine
; I just knew I was in a lot of pain.
And, it wasn't the first time.
Around 1998, I had what I considered a very bad headache. I was in school, though, and figured I could power through. I had work to do, friends to see, and a younger brother to help care for so I gritted my teeth and self-medicated until it finally went away – in 2000.
For years, I was mostly headache free. I would have one every once in a while, but I figured everyone did. And, since they always went away, I didn't worry about them too much. Until 2007 – when everything changed.
I went from my PCP to a neurologist to an ENT to special migraine doctor after migraine doctor. I finally had a diagnosis (intractable chronic migraine with aura), but no one could fix me. I saw the best
migraine doctor in the country – the doctor everyone assured me could help – to no avail.
From city to city, I tried every triptan there is, a number of drugs I'd never heard of, day-long infusions, and more. I was poked, prodded, scanned, and examined. I was (mis)diagnosed with Meniere's disease and had to undergo routine ear screenings every three months for two years. When it turned out I didn't have Meniere's, I was diagnosed with migraine-associated vertigo and told there really wasn't much anyone could do to correct the problem.
At the time, there were no headache specialists in my city so I saw my neurologist (whom, I felt, eventually gave up on me) and a pain management doctor on a routine basis. I underwent yearly MRIs and exams every few months. I was on Oxycontin three times a day, the sedative/anticonvulsant medication Klonopin, a half dozen supplements, and every preventative in the book – and nothing helped. The pain didn't go away – for two years.
Then, I moved to New York and decided that since nothing had helped, I was going to stop everything. No doctors, no pills, no exams. Nothing. I was going to do what I had done in high school – grit my teeth, self-medicate, and hope that eventually my life would return to normal.
But, it didn't.
The migraine wouldn't let go, and I grew tired of fighting it. So I stopped doing that, too. Instead, I decided to let go – of my anger, my frustration, my feelings of helplessness, and my fear – and learned to accept the new life that illness had created for me.
As I learned to accept my illness, a strange thing happened: I began to feel better. The pain lessened. My other symptoms improved. And, one day, I woke up migraine free.
It's now six years later, and while my migraines never fully retreated, I'm no longer stuck in a continuous migraine cycle. I still get migraines more days than not, but they usually ebb. It could take hours, more often it takes days, but I usually have relief at some point. And, I no longer allow my illness to steal my joy or make me afraid to live my life. In fact, I've learned to create a better life with it than I ever had without it.
No matter what stage of illness we are in, whether we’ve just been diagnosed or we have lived with chronic migraines for decades, there are adjustments we can make to increase joy in our lives and to live more fully. I have learned that there is joy in living with chronic migraines, and I hope this book allows me to pass that joy on to you.
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