The Truth About Growing Old(er) in America

© Clayre Breslin-Heaslip 2018

Print ISBN: 978-1-54395-294-0

eBook ISBN: 978-1-54395-295-7

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

My heartfelt thanks to all my brave clients who wanted to feel better and did the work necessary to enjoy life in a more positive manner.

Their stories and values and insights helped me uncover the real truth about aging issues.

And to my students who were curious enough to come to my classes to learn about the policies that affect the older adults in our society, I say.... Congratulations on the insight you demonstrated

And, to Connor... my love and thanks for the continual support and encouragement.

Table of Contents

PROLOGUE

History of Welfare/Giving and Polemic

CHAPTER 1

THE TRUTH ABOUT AGEING

CHAPTER 2­­

IMAGES AND AGEISM

CHAPTER 3

Health Care: Part 1: Physical

Health Care: Part 2: Mental Health

Health Care: Part 3: Do You Have Dental Problems? Be Prepared!

CHAPTER 4

Housing Challenges for Older Adults...Will There Be a Place for Me?

CHAPTER 5

What About All Those Services for Older Adults

CHAPTER 6

Lonliness and Isolation in Older Age Groups

CHAPTER 7

What is the Role of the Church, Religion and Spirituality in the Aging Process?

CHAPTER 8

Who Will Care For Me?

CHAPTER 9

WOMEN’S ISSUES...

CHAPTER 10

SUMMARY AND CONCLUSIONS

APPENDIX A

Medical Model versus the Social (Ecological) Model

Appendix B

RESOURCES

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

PROLOGUE

This story begins in 1983... I remember that day clearly... it was my birthday, and the end of my marriage. The feelings of abandonment and grief were almost overwhelming. I say, almost because in the following months of continual verbal abuse and intimidation that had previously led to panic, low self-esteem and failure, I received what I considered spiritual revelations that produced an inner strength that I had never known, along with great creativity, mental clarity and a resolve to succeed despite my advanced age.

I made the decision to return to school and found several paid internships within the aging network and in behavioral health. Then, fortified with a cache of Government loans, I earned graduate degrees in Administrative and Clinical Social Work from a prestigious University in New York, with a concentration in Aging Studies, and immediately after graduation landed a job at a large, upscale retirement community in the New York suburbs as Director of Marketing and Education and within a short time as Director of Admissions. I earned good money, and I was good at what I did. All the residents in this well-respected community were a minimum of 62 years old, up to and including residents in their 90’s and I continued to learn a great deal about the aging process and particularly about the diversity that exists in this process. I grew in confidence, knowledge, wisdom and compassion, but witnessed a lack of support and encouragement from the President/CEO and felt the residents were not being served or serviced appropriately.

So, after re-evaluating my progress and future needs, I decided to move on. It had been a huge learning experience for me, my government loans had been re-paid and after almost two years of frustration and stress, I left New York and moved to Sun City, Arizona, an area that I had investigated with growing curiosity. Sun City, Arizona, is a planned community... what we designate within my profession as a NORC... a Naturally Occurring Retirement Community. Because of my age, now in my fifties, I was eligible to purchase a home in this community and not only work with older adults, but to become involved in their lives, in their organizations and establish friendships... to have more than surface acquaintanceships....My work was no longer just theory... I was living the life of an aging adult.

In the beginning of my new life in Sun City, for the first two years, I chose to work several part time jobs simultaneously in a variety of local area hospitals, as a medical social worker, in partial hospitalization mental health programs (these are mental health day-time programs, and the participants go to their own homes at 4:00 PM.)... and as a discharge planner, which meant that on Friday afternoons between 2PM -4PM a patient’s doctor would march onto the unit and with military precision announce what patients had to be discharged that afternoon... there was little discussion as he (rarely was it a she) was anxious to get in at least a couple holes of golf or a few games of tennis before a night of festivities. After this trial by fire, I accepted the Directorship of a mental health/counseling program, at all times working with and for older adults. It was an exciting time for me... I particularly liked the distinctive milieus I encountered... it afforded me a superb opportunity to continue to probe the variables that exists among older adults, and to observe, first hand, the facts, the myths, the hype and, unfortunately, the fraud that is inherent in the programs that serve our Medicare/Medicaid older adult cohort. Simultaneously, I was invited to become an associate Professor to teach Aging Social Policy to graduate students at Arizona State University. Then within the next several years, I co-established an in-patient mental health facility, served as a Director for an out-patient older adult mental health program and as time went on, since it seemed I was destined to have a concentration in mental health for older adults, I took my Boards and became a Medicare/Medicaid certified provider in private practice as a gero-psychotherapist, and was occasionally fully reimbursed if a client had supplemental insurance or blessedly paid cash for my services. There are few providers within the healthcare communities that want to be involved with government reimbursement due to the very low rate of that reimbursement, and because of the extended period of time it takes to receive the reimbursement. But private practice afforded me the greatest learning experience about the aging community... there, was the greatest diversity of all... depression, anxiety, grief, physician induced drug addiction, sexual abuse, spousal abuse, alcoholism, frightening economic challenges which were often the effects of ageism.

I came to know that older adults have great courage... that they want to be viable members of society... to contribute their experiences and the wisdom that has been a result of those experiences, sometimes tragic and sometimes heroic.

During all of these years, I had read articles, attended required seminars, watched videos and attended lectures centered on the coming of age... the Senior Boom that would be the outgrowth of the Baby Boomers, a world wide cohort of babies born between 1946 to 1964... approximately 76 million births... the largest cohort in history. This is what you will be reading about in this story of Aging in America... what was/is the hype and what is real...the truth about the services offered, the truth about what happens in many medical offices, the ageistic attitudes of not only society at large but how those attitudes infiltrate and affect the standards of care of the very people who are there to assist you to age with dignity and supposedly appreciate what you have lived and experienced... people like those who work in the helping professions i.e., physicians, nurses, dentists, attorneys, etc.... every client had a story to tell and I have heard and witnessed so many of these stories that have prompted me to write this book. Perhaps it can help you to know what to expect, or to help your family members advocate for you, or to enlighten the minds and change the attitudes of those persons that have been guilty of disrespect and ageistic attitudes or to help those with exaggerated egos realize that compassion, kindness and attention to important details will ultimately bring a greater sense of satisfaction and peace.

This book does not dwell on the cohort of older adults that have been labeled, middle adults... the 50-70 years olds, but it is about the oldest old... that cohort that will be 80+ years old numbering 18 million by the year by 2050. The Boomers came of age beginning in 2011... (coming of age means that they have finally reached the age of 65) and since then, the new challenge is how we are going to be supportive to this cohort of oldest old. Despite what you may have read or heard, this particular cohort will be the poorest, the most frail and in most need of services, a condition that is often debunked as a product of the doom and gloomers who are further accused of inventing this particular brand of negativity to further the cause of the need to keep the expensive government programs for the rich elderly... the greedy geezers who usurp the taxpayers dollars... and at the outset, you must know that I strongly advocate that every program for the older adult needs to be means tested, a phrase you will understand as you read on.

During my tenure as an associate professor at Arizona State University, I taught a subject entitled Aging Social Policy and became aware of the limited understanding many Americans have of how the government operates, and in particular about Social Policy... how it affects the quality of our lives, and how it comes about in the chaotic Washington scene ... why it is important that we elect representatives that have the values, ideals and standards that we, ourselves, espouse. Social Policies are the plans, or guiding principles that represent the aspirations of society... the hopes, dreams, goals and cultural norms. Aging social policies are specific to the aging population, such as the Older Americans Act (OAA), Senior Housing, Social Security, Medicare/Medicaid, etc. and what the Government chooses to do in these areas affects our lives in a very positive or negative manner. Therefore, it is incumbent upon each and every individual to investigate and understand the processes that produce policies that can enrich our lives, that make our world safer, easier to traverse, that are generative and protective.

In the following pages, I have included an in-depth research study I prepared, entitled, History of Welfare/Giving to the Poor. You might ask, Why should that be of interest to me? The answer is that Social Welfare Policy is akin to both social and public policy. It is the politics about who gets what...when...and how. I think the subject of welfare is a grave and significant issue that has been very controversial and very mis-handled in the United States, and I believe that if the projections regarding the baby boomers become an actuality, that it will be important for the younger generation to understand the history of the values, standards, and principles surrounding the idealistic attitudes that have made America strong and the negative attitudes that have fed the greed and dispassion... which seems to be the trend of the day. In any case, we need to make informed decisions when we understand the dichotomies that exist about welfare and giving to the poor.

History of Welfare/Giving and Polemic

INTRODUCING THE HISTORY OF SOCIAL WELFARE....GIVING TO THE POOR.... WITH DISCUSSION AND SUMMARY.

HISTORY OF SOCIAL WELFARE