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    Planet of the Wage Slaves
    Planet of the Wage Slaves
    Planet of the Wage Slaves
    Ebook60 pages50 minutes

    Planet of the Wage Slaves

    By J. Manfred Weichsel

    ()

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    About this ebook

    Richard would rather be in his special place than have to get a job, until he's transported against his will to an office planet where the only way to escape from work is death! With the help of a rebel coworker named Destiny, and a newfound power, Richard must navigate an impossible maze of particle board cubicles and endless spreadsheets in order to take on the oppressive whip-wielding boss and save her people.


    Planet of the Wage Slaves is a hilarious, satirical take on the modern work environment that will have you laughing and cringing at the same time. It's the perfect read for anyone who's ever felt trapped in a soul-sucking job, or who just wants a good dose of surreal sci-fi comedy. So put down that TPS report, grab a copy of Planet of the Wage Slaves, and join Richard on his absurd journey through the cubicle jungle!
     

     

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherJ. Manfred Weichsel
    Release dateSep 3, 2022
    ISBN9798215589540
    Planet of the Wage Slaves
    Author

    J. Manfred Weichsel

    J. Manfred Weichsel writes extravaganzas that fuse adventure, horror, science fiction, and fantasy into some of the most original subversive literature being published today.  Weichsel’s shorter works appear regularly in Cirsova Magazine and anthologies from Cirsova Publishing.  His longer self-published works have gained him a broad and dedicated base of rabid fans comprising folks from every segment of society – readers of all stripes who share a dark sense of humor and a desire to see modern culture burlesqued, and age-old human stupidity mocked.  A fiercely independent author, J. Manfred Weichsel aims to give birth to the classics of the future by writing works ungoverned by the constraints of traditional publishing houses and the inhibitions of contemporary society.   Loved by some and hated by others, Weichsel’s funny, unconventional, often grotesque books inhabit a unique space in American literature and will be read, talked about, and debated for generations to come. 

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      Book preview

      Planet of the Wage Slaves - J. Manfred Weichsel

      Chapter 1

      Approaching footsteps echoed off the walls of the outside hall. I crouched defensively in the far corner of my cell, watching the door intently as I waited in dread. I shuddered with terror as I heard the creak of a key turning in the lock. The iron door swung open with a loud groan, revealing the serious, solemn faces of the warden and three guards standing behind him.

      The warden said, Come on, Richard. It’s time.

      I did not leave my defensive crouch. The guards stepped into the cell. I pressed my feet to the floor and pushed my back against the far wall. Cautiously, the guards made their approach.

      Have a heart! I pleaded. You can’t do this.

      The warden gave me the stern look wardens give condemned men everywhere. Come on, Richard, he said. You knew this was coming.

      With tears streaming down my cheeks I begged, No! You’re too early. I still got time!

      The front most guard reached his hand out as if asking me to take it, gave me a pitying look, and said, Come on, don’t make this any harder on yourself.

      I won’t go without a fight, I shouted, and thrashed my arms around blindly to keep the guards back.

      The warden said, Get him.

      The three guards grabbed me. I screamed, No! No! No! You can’t! I’m a human being!

      The guards dragged me, kicking and screaming, to the door of my cell. I grabbed onto the side of the metal doorway. I’m not ready, I cried. I got rights!

      Two guards pulled at my feet, trying to pry my hands from the metal doorframe, but my grip was too strong for them to break. I was now suspended horizontally in the air, my body stretched like a torture victim on the rack.

      The warden said, Let go of the door, Richard. You’ve had plenty of time to prepare.

      The two guards counted One, two, three, and gave my legs a big tug. I lost my grip on the doorframe, and all three of us tumbled back into a pile. I jumped to my feet, ran back into my cell, and slammed the door behind me.

      I heard the creak of the lock again and the warden opened the cell door. He dove into my cell, tackled me, and held me to the ground. The guards leapt to their feet and ran into the cell. They lifted me into the air.

      With two guards taking my arms and the warden and third guard taking my legs, they carried me from the cell feet first, and continued down the dark and foreboding hall as I tried to squirm my way from their grip.

      Sweat poured from my brow as we neared the end of the corridor. The eyes on my upturned face were glued to the approaching door. No! No! No! I don’t want to go. I cried. It’s not my time.

      The warden and guard released my feet. The other two guards held me upright as I stood there on limp legs. The warden put a key into the lock and turned it, slowly. I cried out, Please, I don’t want to die!

      The warden opened the door and the three guards pushed me into the prison lobby. Worn and tired people sat on benches, waiting impatiently for who-knows-what. A guard asked, Who said anything about you dying?

      I looked at him with tears streaming down my cheeks. What will I eat? I cried. Where will I sleep? I’m going to die out there.

      You’ll just have to get a job and be a productive member of society, the guard replied.

      I don't want a job, I shouted. I don’t want to be productive!

      The warden and three guards half-dragged me to a counter, behind which sat a clerk. He reached into a cubbyhole, took out a small bag with my personal items, and returned them to me one by one. I didn’t even bother to look at the objects as he handed them to me. I couldn’t believe this was really happening.

      The warden and guards dragged me to a pair of double doors that led outside.

      I looked at my feet and mumbled,

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