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Fanfiction Based On Characters From Stephanie Meyers Twilight Series Rated MA for Language and Sexual Situations

Let Your Light Shine

By LolaShoes

Trilogy Part 1

Summary: The honeymoon beginning at the fade-to-black and continuing through Edward and Bella's exploration of intimacy, communication, and how to achieve forever together. ExB, AU Breaking Dawn. Rated M for lots of lemons. Chapter 1: Blissing Edward I promised we would try, he whispered, suddenly tense. Ifif I do something wrong, if I hurt you, you must tell me at once. I nodded solemnly, keeping my eyes on his. I took another step through the waves and leaned my head against his chest. Dont be afraid, I murmured. We belong together. I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words. This moment was so perfect, so right, there was no way to doubt it. His arms wrapped around me, holding me against him, summer and winter. It felt like every nerve ending in my body was a live wire. Forever, he agreed, and then pulled us gently into deeper water. *****

Edward placed his hands under my arms and lifted me up, gazing into my face. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, my legs hanging down in front of him. His arms, almost warm from the water, wrapped around my back. I tangled my hands in his hair and rubbed the nape of his neck softly with my fingertips. He carried me until the warm water reached just below our shoulders, then bent to kiss me. Bella, he murmured against my lips. My wife. I could feel him smiling and he grew hard against my thigh. A wave of heat flushed my entire body and I had to concentrate on breathing. I let my tongue dart against his lower lip, then gently sucked it into my mouth and nibbled it. I heard him breathe in sharply, and opened my eyes to see his golden ones smoldering inches from mine, one eyebrow raised. Easy, my darling, he teased, but I knew from his look that all the old rules were out the window; he was ready. I also knew we were both nervous. I wanted to bring some levity to the moment. You arent planning on putting me down, are you? Im not sure you need to see my grace in action in the ocean. I knew that we were deeper than where I could stand. Hm mmm, he shook his head. His arms tightened against my back, one hand moving lower and grazing my bottom before resting on my upper thigh. Im not planning on letting you go for hours, actually. He almost growled this, and smiled crookedly at me, kissing me lightly on the nose. Hours, I thought. Hours when he wont pull away, wont stop touching me. Hours when I get to touch every inch of this man. I tried to breathe in deeply to slow my racing pulse, but ended up sucking in a jagged breath. I tried to mimic his tone. In that case, I may as well get comfortable. I lifted my legs effortlessly in the water and wrapped them around his waist. I felt his erection pulse against my bottom and his head fell back, letting the most sensual moan escaped his lips. The sound set my body on fire, letting loose all the need, want, and desire I had been carrying for him since the moment we met. Every chaste kiss that left me breathless, every smoldering look that made my knees give out, every time I smelled him and lost my sense of time came crashing into this moment as my skin flushed hot against his. I clenched his waist with my legs, losing myself in the feel of our bodies pressed together. I could feel myself pulsing against him and fought a blush when I realized how obvious every reaction I had must be to him. He brought his lips to mine and kissed me, breathing my name into my mouth. This kiss was different. His lips were cold, but I felt like our flesh was burning together. He took my lower lip between his and sucked, carefully I knew, but his mouth felt rough and urgent. You have no idea how much I have wanted you, Bella, for so long. I have needed to feel you like this, to touch you, he said quietly, his lips moving to my shoulders, up my neck, to my ear. I leaned back to look at him and my eyelids felt heavy with my need for him.

EdwardI I stammered. I cant tell you how good it feels to hear you say that. I exhaled, releasing almost two years of tension. I needed to know how badly he wanted this too, that he wasnt just doing this for me. I could feel the urgency in his arms as they held me tighter, his right arm easily supported my weight and his right hand moved from my thigh to the curve of my bottom, softly stroking the flesh there. I felt his erection move beneath me in response. I moaned against his lips as I pulled his face to mine. Edward, I whimpered on an exhale. Something snapped in him. I felt his body shudder and then almost relax. He was giving in to it, into the longing, into our coming together. Perhaps he finally believed that he would not hurt me, could not hurt me. His left hand moved up my back and towards my front, his fingertips brushing against my ribs, before moving to lightly brush my breast. A low moan escaped my lips. I grabbed his face and kissed him deeply, running my tongue along his lips, my teeth gently biting his skin. His thumb rubbed my nipple and he panted into my mouth. He dropped his head against my shoulder as he let his hand spread over my entire breast, kneading me carefully. So soft, he murmured against my collarbone. He lifted me up higher on his body and leaned down to kiss the top swell of my breast. His touch was overwhelming, almost reverent. I could tell how deliberate his movements were, how he was savoring every touch. He kissed me again, slowly moving his hand and letting his lips brush across my nipple. My head fell back and he pulled his lips from my skin. Breathe, Bella, he said hoarsely. I looked up to find him looking at me with dark eyes, his hand taking my breast again as he bent to let his lips graze my nipple. Breathe, he said, this time perhaps more to himself than to me. I wasnt sure if I heard him correctly when he whispered, We can do this. He seemed to melt into action then. He buried his face in my neck, scattering urgent kisses as my hands moved down his back, grabbing his muscles and relishing the feel of his solid, bare flesh under my fingers. I moved my hands to his chest and marveled in the perfection of his body, of his naked skin finally beneath my hands. We kissed for what felt like hours, my hands caressing his chest and back, his hands roaming feverishly over my skin. We murmured to each other, whispering quietly and breathing in each others scents. I moved my hands down to his stomach, leaning my body back slightly to make room for my exploring hands. His stomach muscles were hard underneath the smooth skin; his soft trail of hair on his navel made me dizzy to touch. I could not move my hands lower with my legs wrapped around his waist. I could not see below the first several inches in the water past his navel. I wanted to see him. I wanted to put my mouth on every inch of him. I need to see you, I murmured, looking up at him and trying not to blush at my own words. I took a deep breath and said more clearly, I need to feel all of you with my hands. I want to taste you. His eyes closed at my words and hissed out a breath. He held me to his chest and turned and ran out of the water, grabbing my towel from the tree and wrapping it around me. Within seconds he was sitting me on the edge of the large bed back in the house.

My knees were bent at the edge of the bed, feet inches from the floor. He stood before me: wet, naked, and glorious. I gasped and my eyes ran from his thighs up his entire body, taking in every inch, committing it to memory for the rare seconds I would let him out of my sight on our honeymoon. He was standing completely still, but I felt energy rippling from him towards me. He was letting me take it all in. He was letting me look at him. You are Edward, you are gorgeous. My body felt hot as my eyes darted down the length of his body. I felt tentative, although I ached to touch him. He didnt move away, didnt warn me. I reached out to him and placed my hands on his thighs. He stroked my hair and murmured my name. I leaned forward and ran my lips across his stomach, letting my tongue dart out against his cool flesh. His hands curled in my hair, gently holding my face close to his body. I looked up at him, holding his gaze, our eyes burning into each other. My hands ran around his thighs to his backside, pulling him towards me. Bella he said with a slight warning in his voice. His face was almost in agony. I need you to touch me, its just His words trailed off and he looked overwhelmed, as if he needed me to guide him. Its okay, I whispered. Just stop me if its too much. He nodded. I pulled one hand forward and wrapped my fingers around his erection. I heard a low growl in his throat and looked up to see him staring at me, his eyes dark with lust. His hands stroked my hair, my neck, my shoulders. The other hand reached down to caress my breast. I moved my hand along the length of him, gently at first, and then faster; I listened to his breathing, watching his face and trying to anticipate what would give him the most pleasure. I bit my lip, trying to guess if it would be okay to kiss him. I leaned down and pressed my lips to the tip of his erection, then ran my tongue along his length. He let out a soft moan and I felt his legs trembling underneath my hand. He didnt stop me. I watched his face as I lowered my mouth over him, feeling instinct take over. I took as much of him into my mouth as I could and wrapped my hand around his base. My other hand ran up his inner thigh, stroking his skin. I moved slowly at first, and then my passion took over and I began to move with more urgency. I moaned against him, the taste of him in my mouth made my body burn. In a flash he was against the wall, staring at me from across the room. I dropped my hand from where it hovered in front of me, still feeling the shadow of his shape again my palm, and sat up, feeling my chest explode with embarrassment. He looked at me for a long moment, his eyes struggling with something I could not identify. Edward, I Im sorry I stammered, blushing furiously, terrified that I had ruined the moment. Shh, Bella, no, he whispered, shaking his head. He inhaled deeply and then began slowly walking towards me. Im fine. Just catching my breath, so to speak. He smiled and I almost fell backwards at the sight of him. He kneeled down in front of me and took my face in his hands, kissing me slowly at first and then

more urgently. He pushed me down and slid me back onto the bed, laying down beside me and leaning over my upper body. His lips moved down my neck to my breasts, finally kissing, sucking, and teasing my nipples. My hips twisted to meet his as my arms wrapped around his neck pulling him closer to me. I moaned his name; I could not find any other word that mattered. My hands moved along his chest, stomach, back. I tried to pull him on top of me but he stayed firmly where he was. His mouth moved lower, his lips teasing my navel. His hands stroked my calves and pulled one of my legs up to bend my knee. He pushed the leg to the side, spreading me before him. I heard him inhale sharply as his mouth moved lower to kiss my inner thigh. I felt a blush cover my skin. Bella he moaned against my leg. Oh his mouth moved up my thigh, hungrily seeking my soft flesh where he stopped and lifted his head to gaze at me. His fingers ran up my thigh to my sex. He touched me gently, sending a jolt of electricity through my entire body. I cried out at the contact, my hands weaving into his hair, pulling him closer. With his fingers, he spread me and explored me, letting his fingertips run up and down my skin, feeling how wet he had made me. I heard his breath hiss inwards. I justI need he mumbled before leaning in and nuzzling me, letting his mouth gently brush a kiss across my clit. He leaned back and moaned, I wish so much I couldyou smell so good His fingers returned and began moving over me slowly at first, and then with more confidence. My hips moved with his rhythm, quiet cries escaping from my lips with every breath. My skin was on fire with a need for release. He ran his fingers along me, and then pushed one finger inside me, then another. His fingers were cold, and hard, and his. Inside me. He pressed his lips to my clit again, carefully, just a feather of a kiss. I grabbed his hand and rocked against him, needing him more than I could possibly describe. He moved back and leaned his head against my thigh as he watched himself touch me. I heard him whisper my name and I put my hands on either side of his face and tilted his head up to look at me. I cant, I began, hoarsely. He kissed my clit once more, and then pushed himself up on one elbow, his fingers still moving as my hips pushed up to get closer to him. Edward, please I begged. He moved up to my face, looking at me with indescribable tenderness. I didnt believe you could become even more beautiful to me, but the way you look now, with my hands on you I cant tell you what it does to me. He leaned and kissed me hard, his lips crushing mine, a loud moan escaping his lips. Bella, I need to feel you I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him on top of me; this time he moved willingly. I spread my legs so he could lie between them and moaned as he rubbed his tip all along where I was slick and desperate for him. He kissed my neck and whispered in my ear. Bella He kissed my earlobe. I dont want to hurt you. He moved against me, hesitating at my entrance. Please tell me if you need me to stop. If this hurts you he trailed off. He pulled his head back to look into my eyes. Do you understand? Please

tell me what you feel. I struggled to keep my eyes open from the passion and need I felt and I nodded slowly. His eyes were full of lust but they were clear; I was relieved to see that he did not look worried. I arched my hips up to him, to urge him to come into me, to be inside me. He pushed at my entrance slowly, watching my face for signs of discomfort. He pushed in deeper and my breath caught with the first sharp pain. He started to pull back. No stay, I said. Just give me a second I pulled his face to mine, opening my mouth to his, needing to feel his breath in my mouth as I adjusted to the feel of him filling me. His hand rubbed down my side to my hip and he slid it underneath me to gently support my bottom. The feeling of his hand on my hip set my body on fire and my hips bucked up against him. Please I moaned again and he pushed farther into me, this time I bit my lip to calm my reaction but the feeling of his body filling mine, the feeling of Edward completely inside me eclipsed the pain immediately, his cool flesh soothing me. He was watching my face and his breath was ragged with the effort it took to move slowly. Move in me, Edward I need to feel you moving inside me. His breath let out in a loud rush, his body immediately reacting to my words. He grabbed my hip and begin moving, gently but firmly, entering me entirely then pulling out to feel the full length of our bodies against one another. He supported his weight with one arm next to my head, his other hand stroking up and down my thigh, pulling my leg up to his side. He grunted softly, moving over me. I didnt know Bella, I didnt know he said, breathing against my cheek, his eyes dark with lust. I could only moan his name. I thought I knew what he meant; I knew neither of us had any idea how it would feel to come together like this. I felt my body burning around his, the heat of my sex pulsing against him, his body moving faster and faster in me as my breathing quickened. You are so wet, he said, You are so warm and wet your body around me God, oh God he kissed me urgently, his mouth covering mine, moaning with every breath. I didnt know he said again. I could feel my body tingling, my breath catching in my throat. I felt like my entire body was rising up above the bed, losing control. I wanted to chase this feeling; I wanted to hold onto it. I heard moaning, then loud cries, and realized it was me. Bella yes, Bella, he murmured in my ear, his body sliding above mine, Come for meoh, Bella please His hand pulled my hip against him, pushing him deeper into me. He rocked faster and faster against me and my eyes clamped shut as waves of pleasure pressed my head back against the bed, and pulled my legs apart. My hands grabbed him roughly to draw him deeper into me, the endless throbbing of my climax moving in a heavy rush along my entire body. I could feel my walls spasming around him and felt him let go. Im coming, Bella oh God Bella oh God He struggled to maintain his rhythm, gently thrusting into me, and I felt him pulsing in me as he came, pressing his lips urgently to my neck.

***** He rolled off of me and pulled my body with him. I clung to him, one of my legs thrown over his torso, his arms wrapped around me. Edward hummed my lullaby into my ear, kissed my neck, and stroked my back. Bella, he whispered, his voice tight with emotion. I am so in love with you. There were no words beyond this. Sleep took me quickly. ***** I woke up to the feeling of Edwards hands lifting me up and gently rolling me onto my side. Mmmmmppppfffff I mumbled into the pillow. Shhhh, Bella, go back to sleep. He rubbed my cheek gently and I felt him kiss my shoulder. Wait what are you doing? I asked, confused. I looked around groggily, blinking. Light was barely streaming in through the window. Sunrise. I stretched and reached for him but he slipped out of my grasp. Edward. What are you doing? I repeated, squinting at him as he continued to move my limbs and look me over. Im inspecting you, he chuckled. Inspecting? I asked, struggling to turn over and sit up. How romantic and yet how clinical. I yawned. He laughed quietly, a gorgeous sexy laugh. Yes, my darling. Inspecting. I am Edward, the Damage Inspector. He ran his hands down my legs, picked up my feet and gently kissed each toe then smoothed his hands back up my legs letting them come to rest gently on my hips. And now, Im finished. Only a few small bruises on your hip. He winced as he looked at the small fingertip-sized purple circles on my hip and upper thigh. Im so sorry about that, Bella. Do you hurt? I wiggled slightly under his gaze, performing the internal assessment. I feel fine, honestly, I assured him, then grimaced as I felt the tightness between my legs. I mean, mostly fine. Im a little sore. I blushed and he leaned in to kiss me full on the mouth, moving his cool thigh between my legs. I sighed at the relief of the cool flesh against my skin; Edward moaned my name and our memories of last night came flooding back to us. He lay down beside me and curled to face me, propping himself on one elbow and playing with a lock of my hair. I take it you slept well? He smiled down at me, knowing full well that I slept like a log. Mmmmm, I did, I murmured, leaning in for a kiss. I cant imagine why, I giggled as he tickled my

sides. Did you hunt? Yes, He said simply. I didnt leave for long. The moment I was outside I missed you terribly. His fingers moved down my arm and up my ribs to lightly stroke the side of my breast. My back arched into his hand and my breath caught in my chest as his thumb swept over my nipple. He chuckled and rolled onto his back, taking his arm with him. I grabbed his arm and pulled him back to me. Oh, no you dont. No, no, no. You do not get to do that anymore. No pulling away, no stopping. A hand on the breast can stay on the breast. I pulled his arm back and cupped his hand around me, smiling wickedly. His grin made me dizzy and I could feel my body respond to his smoldering look. I think I can handle this new rule. He slowly climbed on top of me, spreading my legs apart with his thigh. I could stay here for days. He leaned down and nuzzled my neck; I could feel his erection growing against my thigh. You, however, will need to get breakfast at some point. When given the choice between naked Edward and food, I choose naked Edward, I said thickly, as my hands ran down his back, pulling him against me. You could have both, my love. We are, after all, alone here in this house. I can serve you breakfast in bed, I can even do it naked. I moaned against his neck as he said this; there was something new in his voice, something relaxed, sultry, lusty. He was teasing me and enjoying it. I looked up at his face; he was gazing at my breasts, softly touching them with his fingertips. I tried to contain my need for him I wanted to know what he was thinking. You seemdifferent this morning, I whispered. I wish I had a turn at mind reading. He smiled, Different? As in, naked? He chuckled quietly and leaned down to kiss one peak, then the other, then rubbed both with his thumbs. Mmmm I mumbled before trying to regain my composure. No, I mean, you seem happy. This made him laugh again and I caught myself. Not that you werent happy with me before, thats not what I meant. The words rushed out in a jumble and I sighed. I felt myself blushing furiously. My, my Bella, this blush has taken over more than your cheeks. Your breasts are positively flushed. I may need to cut our conversation short- Blissful, I interrupted him, the word coming to me suddenly. You seem blissful, Edward. And Im not complaining, Im just Im overwhelmed with you this morning. Ive seen you content before but never blissful. The way he was looking at me amazed me. I pushed my hips into him, our moans coming out together at the movement. He moved his arms and put his hands at the side of my face, stroking my cheeks with his thumbs. Leaning down, he brushed his lips across mine. I feel blissful, he said simply. Talk to me, I whispered, pulling his head to mine to deepen the kiss. Tell me what happened. Its just that he pulled back and looked at me warily before continuing. Bella, please do not take

this as a dare. He chuckled softly and thought about his words carefully. It was easier than I thought it would be to control myself with you. I was totally consumed by you, by every movement you made, every moan, every gasp, every breath, every twitch of every muscle. I cant describe how it felt; I was just completely in tune with your body. I dont think I can put it into words. I just dont think I waswhole.until I made love to you. I feel whole. I feel calm. He bent down and ran his lips over my chin, thinking. God, I feel calm. He looked up and smiled at me. I had never seen him look this way, and I felt everything else in my entire world falling away, leaving just this moment. I was speechless. I felt tears forming in my eyes and immediately willed them back. I wanted him to keep talking about this, to tell me more. Is that what you meant? I blushed. When you said I didnt know last night while we were making love. Is that what you meant? I imagine thats what I meant I felt him laughing silently above me. I wasnt exactly choosing my words carefully at the moment. I giggled. I guess not. I just I thought you meant you didnt know it could feel like that. I mean, thats what I was thinking. Edward, I never imagined anything could feel that perfect. I looked up to see him nodding. I meant that and so much more. If Id known how it would have gone, if someone had told me how it would have felt to be inside youBella, I dont know if I would have been able to wait for our honeymoon. He laughed again and I didnt think I would ever get tired of the sound. This morning I just find myself marveling that it was easier than I expected to be in control with you. He shrugged and sighed. Well, let me qualify that. Some things came very easily last night, some didnt. I pressed on his chest so he would roll off of me and propped myself on his chest, looking down at him. Edward, when I put my mouth on you I struggled to hold his gaze, my cheeks burning furiously. Im so sorry about that, I just lost He was sitting up before I finished, placing a finger over my lips and shaking his head. He crossed his legs and pulled me onto his lap so I was straddling him as he stroked my back. Bella, my reaction to that was not about my fear of losing control and biting you or hurting you. I saw a gleam in his eye; he was enjoying this teasing. He leaned down to kiss my nipple and then looked into my eyes. I didnt think I could hold on long enough. With your mouth on meI was going to come in seconds. I dont think my ego could have handled that last night, though I imagine it surely would have given yours a boost. He winked. Oh. Oh, I said and looked down at his lap involuntarily, his erection now straining against my thigh. Your mouthGod Bella you have no idea how that felt he was staring at my lips, his eyes growing dark with lust. He reached out to rub a finger along my bottom lip. I didnt want that to be my first orgasm with you. I licked my lips involuntarily and he moaned.

Was anything elsedifficult for you? I murmured, barely able to breathe with him looking at me like that. His hands ran up my sides and began caressing my breasts slowly, his thumbs pushing my nipples. I had to know what I could and couldnt do. I was barely able to keep from putting my hands on his erection resting between my legs. Mmmm, yes. He leaned in and grazed his lips against my ear. I wanted to slip my tongue inside you last night. That was the most difficult thing for me to resist. I wanted to taste you, but not in the way that I have meant in the past... I moaned against him and moved farther up on his lap, rubbing myself against him. I could move him inside me with just a slight adjustment of my hips and that realization made my heart race. He growled into my ear at the sound of my heartbeat accelerating. What are you thinking? he whispered. You wanted to taste me? I asked. He nodded, dazed, as I reached down and put my finger against my wet flesh, feeling how my body responded to him. I knew he wouldnt put his tongue on me out of fear that his venom would hurt me. I gathered some wetness on my finger and lifted it between us. His eyes followed my hand as I grazed it along his lip. Taste me, I whispered into his ear, letting my teeth bite down on his earlobe. He inhaled sharply as his head fell back. He lifted me up and slowly lowered me down onto him. I gasped at the sensation of him filling me completely this way, so different than last night. His cold flesh felt amazing against my tender skin and I could feel my body clench around him. Edward, oh I leaned against him, slowly beginning to move my hips, not sure what to do, but knowing it felt amazing. He grunted and pulled my chest flush against his. His hands slid under me and moved me gently along his length, helping me. One of his hands came around and began rubbing my clit first gently and then with more pressure. I lost all composure and began thrusting my hips against him and digging my nails into his back. I rubbed myself against his hand and mumbled his name into his hair. His hands became desperate as he murmured quiet words, begging and encouraging. I wanted to stay like this forever; I wanted to make love to Edward for the rest of eternity. His body fit mine so well; I could feel every inch of my skin humming. My orgasm came crashing over me and I whimpered his name over and over as he urged me on, Yes Bella, come for me, yesoh please Bella, he cried out as my walls clamped down around him. I could feel his breath in my ear steady but hard. Im close He laid down on his back so he could watch me move over him, his eyes trained on mine, his mouth open. He fell over the edge, calling my name urgently as he pulsed into me. ***** I sat looking down at him for several minutes, just taking in how he looked underneath me. He was still inside me, running his hands gently up and down my thighs and smiling my favorite crooked smile.

Wow. I exhaled. Indeed. It was then that I noticed. The sheets underneath him were blue. I could have sworn they were white when we arrived last night. Edward? Mmmm? His eyes were trained on my hips, his fingers tracing circles on my thighs. Did youum I hesitated, the answer dawning on me. Edward was there blood on the sheets last night from me? He looked up at me and smiled mischievously, nodding briefly. I ate them so I had to get new ones. I felt him laughing beneath me. Oh my God Edward, stop it! I gasped. His body shook with laughter. I put them in the laundry with some bleach, he waved his hand dismissively. There wasnt much, but it was a little distracting for me. I put them in the wash then went hunting. I nodded, trying to fight the feeling of mortification at the image of Edward changing the sheets. He looked up at my face and pulled me down next to him. Bella. He touched my chin to make me look him in the eye. Love, you were a virgin last night. This is not something to be embarrassed about. You hadnt ever been touched that way. Do you know how special that is to me? He kissed me tenderly, pulling my bottom lip between his and sucking gently. My stomach rumbled loudly. Now, he said laughing, Time for your naked chef to get to work. *****

Chapter 2: Breakfast Edward hopped out of bed lithely and glided into the kitchen. True to his word, he didnt reach for his clothing. I heard him opening the refrigerator and humming to himself. I stretched, climbed out of bed, and headed into the bathroom to clean up. I brushed my teeth and splashed some water on my face, then decided to take a quick shower to shave and freshen up. I stood under the hot water and thought back to last night, shivering as I remembered every moment of our lovemaking. Behind my eyelids, I watched Edwards face as he first entered me: his eyes filled with need, his teeth sinking into his lip to stifle a moan, his body trembling in the effort it took to enter me slowly until I urged him on. I rushed through my shower routine, anxious to get back to him.

I rummaged briefly through the top layer of the monster suitcase Alice had packed for me. A majority of the things in the bag appeared to be some kind of lingerie. A few things my hands pulled out were completely unrecognizable; some even appeared to be made of rubber. I would have no idea how to put some of it on without finding myself tangled or trapped somehow. It occurred to me that that may be the point. I wondered if Alice knew something about our honeymoon and our fantasies that we didnt yet know. I laughed to myself at the thought of Alice trying to block the images of Edwards future sex life from her mind. Edward was different since we arrived. Of course his intensity hadnt changed, it had just become less brooding and more sensual. I had never expected to be able to so freely touch him and be touched by him. I had known that we would try to make love, but I wasnt sure how much of it was to appease me, rather than because he hungered for me the way I hungered for him. I hadnt been sure what proportion of our honeymoon would be sexual and what proportion would just be sexual tension. Last night and this morning had put all of those fears to rest; our physical connection had freed him, at least for now. His ultimate fear, that he would hurt me, seemed to be subsiding. His restraint and his internal torture were lessening. I couldnt stop thinking of his voice in my ear this morning, moaning my name, begging me to let go as he moved me on top of him. Begging me to let go. I dug deeper in the bag and found a simple, black cotton garment. I quickly pulled the strapless beach dress over my head, tied my wet hair into a quick knot atop my head, and padded barefoot into the kitchen. I found Edward wearing an apron and nothing else, plugging in a waffle iron next to a cookbook. His bare back was to me, his long, muscled legs drawing my eyes downward. His flesh made my mouth fall open. The sunlight coming in from the windows on all sides of the room set his body shimmering. I let my breath out shakily and walked toward him. He glanced up at me and let out a low hiss, taking in my dress, my hair piled on my head exposing my neck. Bella, you are exquisite. His voice was soft, loving. He reached out and stroked my cheek before he turned back to my breakfast. I wrapped my arms around his waist and leaned into him, kissing his shoulder. Mmmm, I moaned and closed my eyes and stepping closer. I slipped on the kitchen tile. In a flash he had me in his arms, chuckling. Easy, Grace. He kissed the tip of my nose and turned back to the bowl of batter. Youre the only person Ive known of who can slip while standing still holding onto a statue. I scowled at him, trying to mask my blush. Play nice, I attempted a scolding voice. My hand reached out and swatted his ass, hard enough that my hand stung. Not hard enough to garner any sign of a reaction from him. He didnt even turn to look at me. Im not sure you want to play the spanking game. I think Ill win. He laughed out loud; it sounded like music. I loved this playful Edward. We cant all have the grace of the undead, my love, I giggled, backing away from him. He turned to me, and mouthed, Undead? in mock horror as he advanced toward me, ready to pounce.

What? I asked innocently. Did that hurt your feelings? It hurt more than the spanking, thats for sure. He laughed again, grabbing me by the waist and lifting me up to kiss me fully on the mouth. His mouth opened and he moaned my name as he pressed against me. My legs curled around his waist, my breath coming fast and hot against his lips. Edward I moaned, rocking against him. He sighed and pulled away from me, setting me down gently. I need to divert my attention from your amazing body long enough to get you some food. He sounded genuinely torn: feed the human or ravish the wife? I must be completely focused on cooking. He smiled over his shoulder at me as he quickly cut some strawberries into slices and dropped them into a bowl with sliced watermelon and blueberries. Hot waffle iron, knives, naked vampire, clumsy wife, post-coital bliss these conditions mean that even my reflexes may not be enough to thwart disaster. I giggled as he shook his naked hips playfully. I felt my heart lurch in my chest. I was overwhelmed by the scene before me: my husband, naked except for a pink apron, had just made the most passionate love to me on a private island, and was now cooking me waffles. It all started to feel a bit surreal. I see you found something other than lingerie in the bag, he gestured to my dress. I have to say, I approve of your choice but only barely. He looked over his shoulder again and licked his lips as his eyes darted from my face to my breasts. He poured waffle batter into the iron. Alice did a pretty good job hiding the spoils of her shopping sprees from me, but I caught a couple glimpses as she was doing a mental list of what else she needed to buy. He winked at me wickedly. I resolved to dig into that bag as soon as I had a chance. I walked over to the center island and leaned against it, watching him. I was ravenous for breakfast but completely distracted by my lovers graceful movements. I was not used to being cooked for. I was not used to watching Edward naked in the kitchen. I still felt the tenderness from his body inside me only an hour ago. I had to keep remembering to breathe. His muscles moved underneath his skin as he lifted the waffle from the pan. His hard, toned arm reached across the counter for a spoon for the fruit salad, his triceps twitching underneath his smooth skin. I shuddered, my breath caught in my throat, and my pulse began racing. Bella, darling? he asked me in a slow drawl, his back still facing me. Are you really that excited for waffles? I could hear the smile in his voice. I shook my head, not understanding his question, the haze of lust clouding my thoughts. He chuckled softly, Your heart is positively pounding in your chest, beautiful girl. He smiled at me over his shoulder and pretended to stretch and yawn, flexing his back and arms, his muscles rippling under his skin. The comedy of his movements was not lost on me, yet I couldnt help but moan quietly at the sight, and felt a rush of heat and moisture flow between my legs. I heard him

inhale sharply and look back at me, his eyes dark with need. He quickly placed my waffle, a pat of butter, and a small pitcher of syrup onto my plate. In a blur of movement he was next to me, placing all of the food on the counter by my arm. He snaked his hands around my waist and pulled me against him. I could feel how hard he was beneath the apron. He bent to kiss me and his breath was cool and sweet in my mouth. I can see, feel, smell, or hear every single reaction your body has, my darling wife. I cannot read your mind, but your body sings to me. He growled and moved his hand down and lifted my skirt to touch his fingers to the bare, wet flesh between my legs to show me what he meant. He pulled his hand away and smiled at me, bringing his fingers to his lips. I stared open-mouthed at him. My mind was reeling with passion, my appetite for breakfast momentarily forgotten. Edward lifted a forkful of fruit to my lips. Eat, Bella. He smiled at me and nodded with genuine concern in his eyes, his voice losing the sultry tone and adopting a serious one. You havent eaten in almost 24 hours. I took a bite and tore my eyes from his. My appetite returned and I devoured the breakfast he had made me while he leaned against the stove facing me with an amused expression on his face. From the way you take down that ferocious waffle, Id love to see what you could do to a mountain lion, he chuckled. My head shot up and I looked at him in shock. He was joking about my becoming a vampire. Edward had never joked about my becoming a vampire. He quickly noticed my expression and rolled his eyes. Bella, it was joke. Yes, I will change you eventually. No, I will not change you on our honeymoon. End of discussion. I pointed at him with my fork. Discussion? Whos discussing? Besides, I said, giggling at his seriousness, what goes around comes around, dear husband. You know, you may be begging me to spank you again at some point, and I might just refuse. No, I will not spank you on our honeymoon. End of discussion. I mimicked his tone, grinning. Edward walked towards me slowly. I love you, he whispered. My plate was empty, my fork held loosely in my hand, and I froze, staring at his gorgeous body as he pulled the apron over his head, throwing it behind him. I saw his full length straining towards me, his body almost pulsing as he approached. Edward leaned in to kiss my bare shoulder, making his way up my neck to my jaw. I held my breath, trying to keep my body from squirming. He took the fork from my hand and dropped it unceremoniously on the counter. He lifted me up and sat me on the counter, spreading my legs so he could stand between them. His arms reached around me and pulled me closer to the edge of the island. I began breathing rapidly, my body responding with a rush of heat pulsing between my legs. If that is what you desire, I would happily spend the rest of eternity begging for one touch from you, my love. One kiss, he slowly kissed my neck. One soft touch, his hands ran up my legs under my dress. One loving stroke

His fingers moved between my legs and I gasped at the contact, pushing against his hand. He rubbed me gently with his fingers before sliding one, then two, fingers inside me. Even a spanking, he breathed, kissing my neck. I moaned his name, arching my back to draw him closer. Reaching my arms around his neck, I pulled him towards me to press my lips against his as his thumb circled my clit. So beautiful, so unbelievably beautiful, he whispered against my lips. My body trembled beneath his and I moaned his name again. I tried to reach down to wrap my hand around him, to bring him to me, but he shook his head. He pushed my legs farther apart with his other hand and pulled my body closer to the edge of the island. Do you like my fingers touching you, Bella? Yes, oh I I moaned into his ear. Edward, please faster. His cold fingers pushed into me faster, his other hand snaking under my skirt to rub my clit with more pressure. He groaned into my shoulder and I could feel him trembling slightly. He captured my lips in a searing kiss, and growled into my mouth. I cant believe how good you feel against my fingers, Bella, youre so soft he whispered. My God, you are so soft and wet His voice was husky in my ear, and I was dizzy. I felt my orgasm coming, my feet began tingling, my body started to feel heavy. I pushed against his hand as I felt myself contract around his fingers. His hand moved in perfect timing with my need for him. Yes, sweet girl, yes Edward, oh God, Edward oh Im oh God I cried out as my climax shook me completely. My walls contracted around his fingers, my hips pressed against him for what felt like minutes. His fingers continued to stroke me slowly, bringing me down. I tried to calm my breathing and looked into his eyes; they were full of intense longing and a tenderness I had never seen. A tear slid down my cheek. His lips met mine in a soft kiss and he wrapped his arms around me as my body trembled. ***** I lifted my face to his neck and kissed him softly. His skin tasted so good, cool and sweet. I heard him murmur my name. I wrapped my arms around him and snaked my legs around his waist, my dress still hiked around my ribs. My legs were shaking. He pulled the dress over my head and leaned down to nuzzle my breasts, taking them into his hands and letting his lips graze over my nipples. My pulse quickened and I realized I needed him again already. Edward I love you so much I cant find the right words... I pulled his face to mine and kissed him with the full force of my need, letting my tongue taste his lips. He moaned as I felt him slide against my entrance. I want you, Bella, he said simply, his voice hoarse. I need to be inside of you. He lifted me with my legs wrapped around his waist, and carried me toward the bedroom, kissing me messily, his moans coming faster and more urgently. He whispered my name against my lips as his arm pulled my body tight against his. Our mouths moved hungrily and our words became nonsense. My hands tangled in his hair, as I pulled him closer with my legs, urging him to enter me now, wherever we were.

He groaned and pushed me up against the wall of the bedroom, one of his arms easily supporting my weight, his other hand holding my breast to his mouth. I moved my hips and positioned myself above him, his hard cock touching my entrance. In a careful thrust he pushed all the way into me and cried out my name. He pulled out and repeated the movement, his entire length pushing into me over and over, my sex pulsing wet around him. Bella, fuck he gasped. The sound of his words, hearing him say fuck as he pushed into me drove me mad. I felt frantic in my need to consume him. Edward, please, deeper I begged. He rocked into me and moved deep inside, letting his pubic bone rub against my clit. I moaned at the feel of him completely filling me, stretching my flesh around him. He grunted rhythmically against me in time with my breathing, lost in the sensations of my body around his. I can feel every inch of you around me, he breathed. He pumped into me faster, my back hitting the wall lightly as our moans came out in unison until our mouths met hungrily. I could tell I was close: my body started getting warm and I could feel a flush creeping over my chest, up my neck to my face. The sensation crashed inside me and spread out to my limbs as my sex pulsed against him, clamping down around his cock. I opened my eyes to see Edwards mouth open in ecstasy, watching the flush of my orgasm sweep over my skin. It pushed him over the edge. I could only gasp, Oh, oh, oh He cried out against my neck, our bodies shaking in climax together. ***** He carried me to the bed and laid me down first before curling behind me, his stomach against my back. He stroked my forehead and pulled some damp hair from my face. I never wanted that to end, he murmured, kissing my neck. I wanted to make love to you for hours. But that blush is going to be the death of me. *****

Chapter 3: Crash Bella, Edward grumbled, rubbing his hands in his already-tousled hair. Its not rocket science. I rolled my eyes. Youre just grumpy that you cant read my mind for strategy. Strategy? Edward gaped at me. Bella, were playing checkers. I looked up from the checkerboard. We were sitting on the plush carpet, across from each other at a

small, low table. There is an art to checkers, I will have you know. Besides, Edward, I told you, Im not playing chess with a vampire who is almost 100 years ahead of me in experience. I can do checkers. Id teach you my tricks, he said, winking at me. Its something to considerfor after youve changed, he added quickly, knowing that with that he had my attention. No sleep, eternal lifechess becomes pretty appealing. For a break from all the sex, that is. He arched an eyebrow at me and I almost knocked the table over to get to him. Honestly, I mumbled, attempting to slow my racing pulse, unless you can teach me to read minds, I think Id be less nervous learning chess from Bobby Fisher. I suspect you play dirty. I glanced at the number of my checkers he had taken. I could have sworn he had only legitimately taken two. There were three red checkers stacked in a small pile by his left hand. Edwards head fell back and the sound of his laugh echoed in the room. A Bobby Fisher referencefantastic. He looked wistful. He was fascinating to watch. Those were good days. I smiled, pretending to remember. They were. I was negative sixteen. I placed my chin in my hand, gazing upwards in mock reminiscence. And I was seventeenagain, Edward said dryly. I burst out laughing, falling back on the pillow behind me. I looked up, and now there were four of my checkers in a pile next to his hand. CHEATER! I yelled, pointing him out to the invisible witnesses in our midst. Cheater, right over here! You are such a cheater! Edward dissolved into laughter. Bella, your face was priceless, he sighed, shaking his head. I do not have freaky vampire vision or reflexes, but I can count. And you should only have two of my checkers! Edward crawled on his hands and knees over to me, kissing my lips softly, rubbing his mouth back and forth over my own. Mmmmm He looked into my eyes, his delicious scent intoxicating me. Forgiven? Maybe, I allowed in a shaky breath. You may need to be punished, though. He let out a low growl in my ear. Think of something good while I go for a quick hunt. Okay, I promised, kissing him and letting my tongue slide between his lips, willing him to touch his tongue to mine. I was pushing the boundaries with his mouth and I knew it. Part of me suspected that Edward was more worried about his venom touching my skin than he needed to be. Do I have time to take a quick bath and nap? Absolutely. You have been getting almost as much sleep as I have the last two days. He kissed me, lingering over my mouth and humming against my lips. Go, I urged, before I tackle you. Edward chuckled at the thought, kissed me goodbye, and stood up. I watched him walk away from me, his body naked except for his gray boxer briefs that hugged

his flesh sinfully. He walked into the bedroom and I saw him slip into jeans and a t-shirt and head out the French doors to go hunt. ***** The bath felt heavenly on my body. My skin was sore from the near constant contact and friction; the flesh between my legs was tender and swollen. I knew that we wouldnt be able to stop ourselves from ravaging each other every moment we could, so I relished the few quiet moments alone in the soothing tub. All of the events leading up to this honeymoon felt like a blur, they felt like they had taken place years before. I remembered our vows, my awkward dance and goodbye with Charlie, Alices buzzing excitement. And now this. This island already felt like home, even after only two days. I knew Edward had plans for us after the island; I didnt know how long we planned to stay here and I didnt care. I felt no need to know what we had in store for us tomorrow, let alone next week. I knew Edward was mine, forever. That was the most important detail; everything else would follow. After a while, the water began to get cold, and I reluctantly climbed out of the tub and donned a soft cotton robe. I went and sat on the floor in front of the suitcase Alice had packed for me. It was intimidating. I had rummaged through this bag twice before, but had never taken the time to look closely at what it contained. I could tell Edward was looking forward to seeing me in some of the things Alice had purchased. I peered in, gingerly sticking one hand into the pile of lingerie and clothing. Inside were some of the most beautiful pieces of lingerie I could imagine, organized into piles, small satin bags, and boxes. Breathtaking colors, all pieces made of the most delicious silks, lace, and even some soft Bella-friendly cotton. I pulled out a small satin bag that contained a matching black bra, thong, garter belt, and silk stockings. Another small bag contained a miniscule lacy red negligee, with a matching pair ofcrotchless underwear? I blushed even though I was completely alone and shoved that bag to the bottom of the suitcase. I felt a box at the side of the suitcase and unearthed a pair of black strappy heels with at least four inch razor thin heels. Was Alice serious with this? Had the crazy vampire no recollection of my inability to walk in normal shoes? When I dug deeper, piles of lacy underthings spilled forth and I began to feel overwhelmed. Our physical relationship was so new; I still fantasized about how his eyes hungrily roamed my naked body, how he was never able to close his eyes when he kissed me. He explored every inch of my body, memorizing my skin, my reactions, my curves. I blushed hotly when I imagined his face seeing me in any of these things. I dug through the pile to find something that combined comfort and sexy, and opted for some midnight blue lace boy-shorts and matching bra. I climbed onto the massive bed, and curled up for a nap, leaving the bra next to me to put on for Edward when he came home. ***** When I awoke it was dusk; Edward was not with me. A cool breeze was blowing in through the French doors, billowing the curtains and the gauzy mosquito netting around the bed. I slid the sheet around me to warm up, and pulled it with me as I slowly sat up in bed, rubbing my face with my hands. Edward appeared, leaning against the door frame. He looked breathtaking, wearing only a pair of dark green board shorts that sat low on his hips, revealing the V of his toned abdomen, his hair adorably messed, a crooked smile playing on his lips.

How was your rest, my love? he asked softly. You look adorable. Deliciously rumpled. Mmmm, it was good. I stretched. Why didnt you wake me? When did you get back? About an hour ago. I figured you needed your rest. I heard music coming from the living room and over his shoulder could see the shadows of a fire flickering on the walls just beyond the bedroom door. Come sit with me. He held out his hand. You must be hungry, too. Ill be there in a minute, I said through a yawn, holding up a finger. Human moment required. He smiled and left me to my moment. I climbed out of bed, feeling groggy and disoriented. I went into the bathroom and splashed some water across my face and brushed my teeth, trying to wake up. I went back into the bedroom, put the blue lace bra on and started to climb into some clothing but changed my mind. Why put something on only for it to come off within 10 minutes? I smiled at the thought. When I walked into the living room, I realized Edward had laid out food for me in front of the fire. Cheese, bread, grapes, and a glass of wine were all sitting on top of a tray on the white rug in front of the fire. Edward was sitting in a chair next to the fireplace, holding a book. His mouth was hanging open. What? I panicked, looking down. Oh. I had forgotten the lingerie. I smiled coquettishly, turning for him, and purred, What, this old thing? Bella, he said softly. If my heart were still beating it would have come to a screeching halt seeing you in this Edward, are you trying to get laid? I teased him. My smile disappeared as I saw the intensity of his expression. My heart began pounding in my chest. I felt a sudden surge of power over him, seeing him react to me this way in the lingerie. Thank you, Alice. He nodded, dazed. Absolutely. He blinked his eyes firmly as if to focus and motioned to the blanket, Please, Bella, eat something. I walked over to the blanket, hearing his breath hitch in his throat as I slid down on the blanket, rolling onto my stomach, bending my knees, and hooking my ankles together. I grabbed the glass of wine and took a sip, glancing over my shoulder at him sitting behind me, frozen. Beautiful he muttered, watching me intensely. I nibbled on some cheese and bread, taking a few more sips of wine. I felt Edwards gaze burning into me. Bella, youre killing me. Eat faster or put some clothes on. His voice was rough, seductive. I never expected my self-controlled and brooding husband to be so insatiable. I kept my voice low, husky.

I never expected my doe-eyed and blushing bride to be such a sex kitten, he countered, his tone matching mine. His words made my body respond immediately; I felt a rush of arousal between my legs. Edward gasped behind me and I climbed up on my hands and knees, arching my back and tossing my hair to the side. I looked over my shoulder at him and let a low purr escape my throat. In an instant, Edward was behind me. I heard fabric rip and saw his shorts fall next to me in shreds. His hard thighs pressed against me and I felt his erection against my backside. I had a momentary pang of sadness that those shorts were ruined before I realized what he was starting, quickly, differently. He growled and yanked my panties down slightly before ripping them off of me in a blur of movement, next ripping the clasp of my bra apart in back, letting the straps fall down my arms and onto the floor. I moaned reflexively. He grabbed my hips as he thrust into me, pumping quickly as low grunts escaped his throat. I gasped and arched my back, and he moved faster, pushing deeper into me. I felt his hand move into my hair and suddenly he was pulling my head back, his fingers fisted in my curls. He groaned loudly, thrusting with abandon against my flesh, his other hand still grabbing my hip forcefully. I realized I couldnt move my body away from him at all; I was trapped by his grip on me. My heartbeat raced and he reacted immediately, leaning his head down close to my neck, growling. A small part of me felt frightened. I had never seen Edward like this. A larger part of me was unbelievably turned on to see him so desperate for me, to see the effect I had on him. Moments after he entered me, he thrust into me three times quickly and let out a pained cry, almost an animal sound. His body shuddered, his cock pulsing in me, his legs shaking violently against the back of my thighs. He stilled, for barely a second, then pulled out of me immediately, and flew back to sit with his back against the couch with his arm thrown over his face and an arm leaning against a bent knee. I froze in place, breathing heavily and not entirely sure for a moment what had just happened. The entire interaction had taken probably only thirty seconds, and although I could hardly catch my breath from excitement, I could sense that Edwards mood was distinctly different than mine. Edward, I said softly. He was silent. Edward, please. Talk to me. Just give me a moment, Bella. His voice was hard. I sat and watched him for what felt like an eternity. He didnt move a single muscle. I could tell he wasnt even breathing. Edward, I said again. Im okay. Bella he almost sobbed my name. I looked down and did a quick inspection of my body. I was not bleeding; my hips were red but not bruised, though they might be by morning. Everything moved normally, felt normal.

Edward, Im okay, I reassured him again. Better than okay, actually. More turned on than anything. Can it be my turn now? I tried to be playful. He lowered his arm and looked at me in shock. Turned on? Bella, I just attacked you. I know. It was unbelievably hot. My tone was defiant. I would not let him refuse himself a moment of unbridled passion. Hot? His eyes burned in rage; I knew it wasnt directed at me. Bella, I could have really hurt you. Were you going to bite me? I asked, knowing the answer. No, of course not. He almost sounded offended. Do you think you hurt me? I asked. He was silent for a moment. I dont think so, at least I hope not. But its a fine line. I had no regard for your own need. I thought I had morecontrol than that. I thought I could pleasure you first and foremost. I just had to have you, I took you like a fucking animal he put his head back down on his arm. I stood up and walked towards him. Edward, look at me. He didnt move. Look. At. Me, I said in a hard voice. He looked up, and I saw his eyes scan my body more carefully for marks, for any sign that he had hurt me. I stood in front of him; his eyes were frozen on my body, his face pained. Wont you at least hold me and talk to me? I asked quietly, folding my arms across my body protectively. He opened his arms for me and I curled into his lap, kissing his neck, his jaw, his unresponsive lips. Can I tell you how it was for me? He was silent. Because it was amazing. I wanted to talk about what happened. I wanted it to be safe for us to be selfish, horny, or wild with each other. Of course, love, please, he whispered against my shoulder. I liked teasing you, I said simply. I liked knowing how I was making you want me. Its been hard for me, for so long, to see you able to resist me seemingly so easily. I heard him scoff at my words. Wait, really. Im telling you my experience. I know you had a hard time resisting my blood, at first. But my body always seemed to be an easier pass for you. That was never the case for me. I have needed physical contact from you for so long, I have always needed more. You would kiss me and my heart would feel like it was exploding inside my chest. You would pull away and it would crack. I cant tell you what a turn on it was tonight to see you lose control when you saw me in the lingerie, and when you sensed my bodys reaction to your voice His breath hissed in at this, and to take me like that, just for your pleasure, simply because you needed me that badly... I trailed off,

touching his face, willing him to look at my eyes. He considered my words. Bella, I have always wanted you. I cant express in words how much I have wanted you. He looked up at me, and I heard the truth in his words, but I knew part of me would never be able to understand how he resisted really touching me for so long if he had felt what I felt. Its justI have to be thoughtful about how much force I use with you, especially now that weve crossed that line. I cant go back now; I need you. Making love to you is as vital to me as is blood. No, far more vital to me than even that. And that need scares me because I need to know that I can trust myself. I need to be in control. And you were. I countered, my entire body flushed at his words. Making love to you is as vital to me as blood now. No, far more vital to me than even that. You never crossed that line, even when you took me with abandon tonight. You said it yourself: you can read my body, even if you cant read my mind. You just needed to I smiled shyly, letting the word hang between us. Needed to what? He looked at me, his eyes beginning to soften. You know, I said, blushing. Say it, Bella. His eyes were trained on my lips, smoldering. I took a deep breath. You just needed tofuck me, I said, pushing my chin up, finding strength in the truth. He let out a soft moan and let his head fall back against the cushion of the couch. I think thats pretty normal. Whats normal here? Im not sure I can find that many vampires with experience in this particular matter. I think that is simply a matter of population ratios, love. I tried to make him smile. He ignored my attempt at humor. I guess I never figured Id be able to be anything but tender and soft with you, without hurting you. I still dont know where the limits are, and thats what scares me. I could understand that. My heart ached for him. I pulled his head forward and kissed him, and felt his mouth respond to mine. Can you be soft with me now? Because I need you to make love to me. I kissed his cheeks, his jaw, his neck. I flicked my tongue against his ear. Please? ***** Edward carried me into the bedroom and laid me down on the bed, stretching his body out next to me as he had our first night together. He gently traced patterns on my stomach, letting his fingertips draw soft circles around my nipples. He leaned down to kiss me, and a tight moan escaped his lips. I felt so much tension in his kiss, in the space between us. He needed to calm down. He needed me to help. I straddled his legs just above his knees, and let my hands move over his stomach, his chest, his

shoulders. I kept my eyes locked on his. I moved my hands down to his legs, massaging his thighs. My hand moved to his cock, and I leaned down to kiss his stomach, moving my lips down, but never breaking contact with his needy gaze. He put his hand on mine around his shaft. Its probably best to not try putting your mouth on me yet, love. he said, softly. I dont know if he trailed off. I nodded and smiled my understanding at him. We could work up to that. We would work up to that. I kept my hand around him and stroked him slowly, watching his face relax, neither of us making a sound. His eyes softened as he reached for my breasts, letting his fingers stroke my nipples, pinching and rolling them gently between his thumbs and index fingers. I glided my hand along him for several minutes, spreading the slickness from his tip as I touched him while moving my other hand to gently cup his scrotum. I closed my eyes, relishing the feel of him in my hands. The quiet intimacy of the moment almost took my breath away. I moved my hips over his and felt us slide together as I leaned down to kiss him. His eyes were full of the most intense love, it made my heart hammer in my chest to see him look at me with such naked adoration and need. Is this okay? I asked, sliding over him and feeling him at my entrance. God yes, he whispered, pressing up into me the slightest bit. I lowered myself onto him, gasping at the sensation of feeling him so deep inside me. He watched me tenderly as I struggled to not cry. I love you, he almost choked the words out. I touched my hand to his cheek before moving over him, rocking my hips and finding my own rhythm. His eyes stayed locked on mine, his mouth opening slightly as I leaned down to kiss his neck before sitting up again. We made soft love this time, his eyes never leaving mine, his hands softly stroking my hips as his lips silently formed the shape of my name over and over again. *****

Chapter 4: Dirty I was in bed, grabbing the pillow behind my head. A warm breeze drifted in through the open bedroom doors. Edwards head was buried between my legs, his mouth ravishing me. Hungrily, passionately, finally. Edward, I moaned, more, please, oh God your mouth I arched my back, pushing myself against his face, urging him on.

Fuckyou taste so good, he murmured against my flesh, sliding two fingers in me and pumping with the rhythm of his tongue. Your mouth Edward, I cantI just I moaned, releasing the hold on the pillow behind the head and tangling my hands in his hair. Ahhhh. fuck me Edward I felt his cold breath on my ear and two cool fingers gently sliding into me. Happily, a louder voice growled in my ear. I startled and jerked awake. Shhh, he whispered, kissing me. What time is it? I asked, confused, as my arms snaked around his neck, pulling his head to mine. Reflexivly, I arched my hips against his hand. Somewhere between 3 and 4am. I couldnt take it anymore, you have been begging me in your sleep for hoursGod Bella you are so wet for me His lips moved over my neck as his fingers worked inside me. The effects of my dream were evident by the feel of his fingers easily moving in me. Tell me what you were dreaming The dream came back to me slowly and I felt my entire body blush. I wonder what he had heard me say. Um I hesitated, hoping he would forget his question. I pulled his body over me and pushed my hips against his, urging him into me. We came together frantically and his mouth covered mine, stifling a tight moan. He pulled my left leg up around his hip, holding his weight above me with his right elbow planted next to my head, his fingers in my hair. He looked down at me; the sight of him moving above me made me close my eyes and focus on breathing. Bella, you have quite the vocabulary when youre dreaming. Some of the words that come out of your mouthfuck, he gasped as my leg tightened around his waist, his body shaking. Tell me about your dream, he begged in a low growl. I ducked my head against his shoulder, pulling him closer to me. I dreamt you had your mouth on me, I mumbled into his shoulder. I heard him suck in a breath and he leaned down to kiss me, rubbing his lips over mine and opening his mouth to let me taste him. Like that? he teased knowingly. No I panted He moved in me harder, groaning my name. He leaned down and kissed my breast once, then a lingering kiss, blowing a puff of cold air on my hard nipple. Likethat? he breathed.

NoGod Edward, you feel so good moving in me. I arched my back, grinding my hips against his. He hissed and buried his face in my neck moaning. Bella, tell mein this dreamwhere was my mouth? I grabbed his ass and pulled him deeper in me. I knew what he wanted. On my pussylicking me, I whispered in his ear, biting his ear lobe. Oh God, Edward cried, arching his back and driving into me. He thrust into me hard and fast, feeling my body approaching climax. Bella, come for me, now. My body obeyed, seizing around him. I cried his name, four, five times. His movements slowed to ease me down from my orgasm. My arms fell to the side; my legs felt like jello. Mmmmmm, I like that word, he moaned in my ear. Did my mouth feel good on your pussy, Bella? Were you wet for me? I felt close to passing out. I had no idea Edward could make me more ravenous than what Id already experienced our first two nights together. Yes, baby, your mouth made me scream for you I gasped, feeling myself reaching the edge of control again. Edwards movements slowed, and he teased me, licking my neck. I startled at the sensation, a soft rush flowing over my skin. Did he know he did that? Did I enjoy licking you? Was I moaning, calling your name? His cold breath was coming out hard against my neck, not from exertion, but from passion. He was so hard in me, I knew he could come at any moment. The thought of him holding back to tease me made my entire body throb with need. Faster Edward, please, Im so close I begged. Easy, love. You didnt answer my question. Did I enjoy licking you? What did it do to me? His voice was rough in my ear and his hips moved agonizingly slowly, but each thrust was hard and deep. You did, I gasped, delirious and on the edge of climax, willing him to move faster in me and give me release. You loved licking my pussy, it made you so fucking hard Theres my girl, he gasped, thrusting into me mercifully fast. There is my fucking beautiful, dirty girl. I bet it made me hard, I bet I couldnt get enough of your sweet little pussy His words made me insane. I started to moan, and heard his own sounds mixing with mine, getting louder and more desperate. He had pushed me to the point of senselessness, climax after climax rippling over me. It felt like hours that I was calling his name, panting. When he came, he groaned loudly, arching his back and shuddering on top of me. He showered my face and neck with soft kisses before rolling off of me, collapsing onto the bed. We both lay in silence for several minutes. My chest heaved with exertion. Finally I asked, What was that?

Edward let out a low chuckle. Whatever it was, it was unbelievable. I curled up into his side, exhausted. I hope that wasnt a dream, too, I murmured against his chest before falling asleep. *****

Chapter 5: Tingling I woke to Edward planting soft kisses along my shoulder, humming my lullaby. I curled against his cool torso, the day already felt warm with sunlight streaming bright into the room. Good morning, sweetheart. I kissed his chest, nuzzling against him. It is indeed. He stroked my hair and curled his leg over my hip, pulling me close. Have a good night, did you? I asked with a smile in my voice. Edward laughed. I did. And you? Amazing, I sighed. I had some pretty wild dreams. Do tell, Edward purred, leaning down to kiss my ear. He whispered seductively, I do so love hearing about your dreams. I giggled and turned over, pulling his arm with me so he was spooning me. What got into us last night? I wondered, blushing at the memory. Whatever it was, I suggest we buy it in bulk. I could feel his body responding behind me. The middle of the night is such an intimate time. It felt. I searched for the right word. It felt like we were acting out a dream. Edward moaned quietly in my ear. If only he kissed my neck, his hands stroking my breast as his hips pressed and retreated against my back. I want so much to act out that dream. We were quiet for several minutes, listening to the sound of the waves crashing close to the house. ***** Edward? I asked. Yes, love. Do you ever feel like you might missyour life beforethe quiet, that is? He laughed. God, no. Before you Bella, I was merely getting by. I would hardly even call it existing.

Do you worry that maybe you might want something else, someday? I didnt know what had come over me. I felt like crying I was so in love with him. He was silent for a few moments. Is that something you worry about? Bella, Im not sure what youre asking. I wasnt either. Forever is a long time. Edward became perfectly still. Very quietly he agreed, Forever is a very long time. His voice was filled with anxiety and sadness. You dont think youll get bored of I gestured behind my back to the space between us, - this? Edward pulled me tighter against him as he exhaled and leaned his head against mine. What is this about, darling? Do you think Ill tire of you? That Ill begin to find this he mimicked my gesture around us, with his hand in front of me - tedious? I struggled to find the words. I didnt know what was going on in my head. In only three days, the honeymoon had been passionate, of course, but also raw. Intense. I felt very exposed and vulnerable. Every moment felt more perfect than the last, each time I realized how much he loved me I feared even more what life would be like without him. My life had come to depend, quite literally, on this other person and I was terrified that he would wake up and realize he had made a mistake. I guess thats what Im saying, I said slowly, looking over my shoulder and smiling weakly at him. I feel like I have so much lessexperience and knowledge than you. I worry youll eventually find me unstimulating. I shrugged against him. I hadnt quite captured the essence of my sudden fear, but I couldnt find the words. He pulled me into his chest, caressing my breast, pushing his hips against my back. Bella, love, I find you altogether too stimulating. I sighed. Its hard to explain what I mean. That isnt what I mean. My voice sounded small and vulnerable. Edward turned me to face him, his expression a mixture of guilt and reassurance. Bella. He took my face in his hands. My joke was poorly timed, I am sorry. You are feeling anxious, though I cant imagine why. I am nothing if not completely and totally devoted to you. I am a constant in your life. He kissed me softly and searched my eyes. Please, listen to me. What I should have said was this: you are right. I have lived longer, I have seen more. But, as I said, it was barely an existence. I was barely managing. Now, I get to experience it all again with you. Not only with you, but with myself as an entirely different person. A happy person. A man, in love. Married. Blissful. He kissed my lips tenderly, opening his mouth hesitantly, before holding his breath and a few moments later closing his lips against mine, changing his mind. He kissed down my cheek to my ear. All my time alone, meant that I had enough time to try lots of things. And I know what things will be eternal passions such as music. And of course other things held my interest minimally for a short while, and then I moved on. He looked at me again to make sure I was listening. Bella, for context, you eclipsed music the moment I laid eyes on you. Imagine

the degree to which I depend on you, need you, now. I didnt want you because I was lonely. Bella, I wanted you because I belong to you. I sighed. How could I argue with such a proclamation? I snuggled against him in response. Relaxing, he murmured, However, the ill timed joke is entirely true. I now have two reasons Ill never need anything or anyone else: your brain, and this body. His hand trailed down my back and up to my shoulder. I kissed him fully, using my body to thank him for understanding my inexplicable insecurity that I could ever lose him. Last night in the living room, the expansion of our understanding of each other and our needs, and then later, the middle-of-the-night connection in a new erotic place both of these events created such a deeper connection and made me realize all over again that I could not live without Edward. I was not whole without him. Bella, more for the exercise of the conversation than for reassurancehow do you know you wont need more more family, more space, or morehuman experiences? His hand lay on my abdomen, his voice quiet in my ear. More family? I asked, laughing. You are right, he agreed, chuckling. We certainly do not lack family energy. But the other parts, well I said, thinking, more spaceI guess well figure those things out as we go. If one or the other of us needs space, we can figure out how to get it. More human experiencesEdward, do you mean children? Yes. I sighed and hesitated. I havent thought through this answer, but I know silence here would make you insane. I will try to think out loud. Thank you, he breathed against my neck. I cant pretend that I havent thought about it. The reason I would want that with you and only you is because I would want to create something that combined us. I wouldoh. I would love to have your child Edward I sighed and he stroked my face. But it doesnt cause me pain that it isnt possible, and even if it were I wouldnt want that for us now. I mean it when I say you are my entire world, you are enough. Far more than enough. Edward kissed me, taking my bottom lip between both of his. He looked at me hesitantly before pulling my lip into his mouth, his tongue softly running back and forth across the flesh. I didnt move a muscle, I stifled a moan; I didnt want the moment to go away. I felt a small tingling on my lip, nothing more. He moaned against me, relaxing, and began kissing me again, deeper, whispering my name. I wrapped my arms around his neck, throwing a leg over his hip, pulling him to me. We kissed for hours, relishing in the feel of each others mouths. Every now and then he let his tongue touch mine briefly, the contact like a bolt of electricity shooting down my body, my body hungered to let him explore me. *****

I tucked my head against his chest, inhaling the smell of him, of our scents mingled together in this bed. His hand drew soft lines up and down my back. My hands lay on his chest, my fingers lightly rubbing his soft skin. Edward? Mmmm? Do Alice and Jasper ever fight? He laughed at this. What on earth made you wonder that? My mind could not be farther from such things. Train of thought, I shrugged, smiling up at him. Emmett and Rosalie fight all the time. We know both you and I have hot tempers too He chuckled at this, not disagreeing. But I dont think Ive ever seen Alice and Jasper argue. He laughed again. They do, though rarely. Jasper is so laid back, and Alice moves on so fast from things, that few things ever turn into an argument. What usually happens, though, is that one of them gets upset, but Alice knows how it will turn out, and Jasper senses her calm about it, so they kind of skip to the making-up part. I laughed. How convenient. Now, he chuckled, the exception is when Emmett talks Jasper into something stupid strip club, weird bets and Alice doesnt like either the outcome or the decision to join. Then shes a little hellion on wheels. Or a hellion in high heels, I joked. Better, Edward agreed, laughing. I was quiet for a beat, and then looked up at him. Strip clubs? Edward laughed and his head fell back against the pillow. There it is. I was waiting for that, you know. Do you gooften? I bit my lip, chewing on it lightly with my teeth. Edward was mesmerized with my mouth. No, he murmured softly, leaning to kiss me. Never. Emmett has gone once or twice to get a rise out of Rose. Jasper has gone maybe one time with Emmett, but its really not a good idea for him. Alice goes more often. Alice goes? I asked, surprised. He shuddered. She says its to brush up on new moves whatever that means. I banish the images, really I do. I laughed at his reaction and fell quiet for a few minutes, thinking about Alice dancing for Jasper. My

mind wandered to the suitcase on the floor full of lingerie and things I didnt even know existed before this trip. An idea had been percolating in my head ever since the events in the living room last night. I wanted him to trust that I was here to meet his needs, as he was here to meet mine. I would need to return to the suitcase for help. My stomach tensed at the thought of what I planned, how I wished I could move in a way that was at all sensual. After a few minutes more of comfortable silence, Edward touched my cheek. Bella, what are you thinking? Just wishing I was more coordinated. I brought him to the end of my train of thought, knowing hed figure out the steps in between. He did. He sat up and pulled me onto his lap as he leaned against the headboard. You dont need a pole and pleather to be out-of-this-world sexy, Bella. I giggled. Mmmm, you get a kiss for that, Make it a good one, they come by so rarely, he growled, teasing. I turned and straddled his lap, opening my mouth to his and silently begging him touch his tongue to mine again. His mouth opened and he gently slid his tongue against mine for the briefest of moments. We both moaned and pulled back, looking at each other. About your dream last night he leaned in to my neck and whispered against my skin. I need to know what I can and cant do. How did my tongue feel on your lips earlier and against your tongue just now? My heart slammed against my chest, and Edward looked at me warily, worrying I was moving too fast with this. It tingled a little, likesomething spicy might feel, but without the hot. I struggled to find the best description. It was not altogether unpleasant. He looked at me, clearly not knowing that sensation. It just tingled. Tingled ispromising, He smiled at me. I want to give you everything, Bella, and God knows I want to make love to you with my mouth. I smiled at him, blushing. Truly, Bella. If it is your nighttime dream, it is my constant one. I know that the venom is dangerous, and that if it reaches your bloodstream itwell, you know. But Ive gotten good at controlling how much comes into my mouth when I kiss you. Its very minimal. Id like to try toput my mouth on you, but only if youre ok with it, and only on your skin first. Notyour softer flesh, not yet. I noticed he did not say pussy. That was apparently our middle-of-the-night word. I smiled, and he smiled back at me, understanding. He looked at me, waiting. Are you expecting any answer other than Please Edward, lick me now? Really? He laughed and hugged me close. My adorable, delicate flower. But firstyour lunch.

I hadnt eaten yet and with his words realized I was starving. I will just make something quick for myself. Why dont you go for a swim and I will come meet you? He nodded and climbed out of bed after giving me a sweet kiss. ***** I grabbed the first swimsuit I could find a blue and white polka-dot bikini and headed outside. Edward was playing in the small waves and stood up when he saw me approaching with a blanket over my shoulder and a book in my hand. Bram Stokers Dracula? He asked incredulously from at least 20 feet away. Youre hilarious. How did you-? I began then stopped. Vampire vision. I giggled. I figured a little non-fiction would do me good. He ran to me, and my eyes could not accommodate the speed. In less than a second his arms were around me and he was carrying me to the water, slung over his shoulder. Non-fiction? he growled. I dropped my book and blanket, and kicked my legs for him to put me down. My movements didnt alter his course. He carried me into the water until it reached his chest, and slowly lowered me, sliding me along his body. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pushed my hips against his, our flesh separated painfully by our bathing suits. By the wayI must make sure to thank Alice for thispurchase. He eyed the bikini appreciatively and I felt his cock beneath his swim trunks. I rubbed against him, realizing we had not gone this long without making love for almost two days nighttime included. I miss you. I whispered into his ear, reaching back to pull the tie of my halter top. Me too. He kissed my neck and leaned back from me, allowing my top to fall from my neck. He raised one hand to cup my breast, lifting it to his mouth. He looked up at me through his long lashes and swirled his tongue around my nipple. Oh God! I cried, my back arching involuntarily as I felt my entire chest grow warm then cold then flushed. Encouraged by my reaction, Edward took my nipple gently into his mouth, careful to protect my flesh from his teeth, and sucked, his tongue flicking hard against my peak. I felt as though there were an immediate connection between my nipple and my sex and my body shook with each flick of his tongue. My skin began to tingle deliciously, more sensitive than I had ever felt it before, each nerve ending responding to his touch. Edward. Now. I growled into his ear. He chuckled, Looks like I found the on button and quickly pulled down his shorts and pulled the bikini off of me before bringing my legs back around his waist. He threw our clothing onto the shore and pushed himself into me easily. Jesus you feel good, he groaned, and slowly moved my body up and down his length.

I moaned at the feel of him filling me and tightened my legs around his waist. After several minutes, I felt my orgasm approaching and clutched his neck. Faster, Edward, please, I begged. Bella he moaned at the sound of desperation in my voice. He moved both hands down on my bottom and began pumping in and out of me, his pubic bone rubbing against my clit. Arching his body down to lick my nipple again, he took it between his lips and flicked it with his tongue. I came faster and harder than I thought possible, the sensation of his mouth on my nipple was unlike anything I could possibly imagine. Oh God Bella, so tight, oh God he gasped against my chest. My flushing skin, and the speed at which I climaxed, pushed Edward over the edge and he began thrusting into me with jagged shifts of his hips. His voice carried my name echoed down the beach as he came. He slowed down his movements, holding me in place. I ran my hands down his chest; his skin was warm from the water. He leaned to kiss my lips, muting the sound of my whispered, I love you. And I love you, my wife. He opened his mouth against my kiss, sweeping his tongue across mine and around it, exploring and feeling. We kissed like this for a long time in the calm surf. I felt him grow hard inside me. Edward, I whispered, More He turned to the beach, taking me back into the house. He laid us down on the bed and never slipped from me as he pulled my legs around his thighs. I rocked my hips up into his, relishing the intimate moment with our need for quick release past. He whispered in my ear, It would appear we have found an enhancing agentyes? Yes, we have, I agreed. Turns out, tingling isgood. He lowered his lips onto mine again, kissing me deeply. I could tell both of our minds were filled with the meaning of our discovery. *****

Chapter 6: Bella's Version I climbed out of the steaming shower and dried off with a plush cotton towel. Rummaging through the suitcase, I found a soft light green cotton tank and a dark denim miniskirt and slipped them on over some of the lingerie Alice had selected for me. I hadnt worn real clothes in days. I resolved to make myself a real dinner as I pulled my hair into a ponytail and walked into the living room. Edward was reading, listening to Aretha Franklin. Aretha? Really? I asked, pleasantly surprised.

I heard a recording of her covering Pavarotti and went and got her earlier work. Her voice is transcendent. He gave me his crooked smile, eyeing me appreciatively. Also true for your outfit. Edward was lounging in boxer briefs, his hair adorably tousled as usual. Well thank you, Mr. Cullen. You are welcome, Mrs. Cullen. I walked over and kissed him gently. Im going to make myself dinner. Do you want to keep me company while I cook? Of course, love. Edward followed me into the kitchen, growling behind me. Your legs look about five miles long in that miniscule skirt. Its disturbing that Alice knows so well what I would want to see on you. He let out a low whistle and swatted my bottom. I blew him a kiss as I gathered the food I needed to make spaghetti and meatballs, garlic bread, and salad. I hesitated, mock concern on my face as I turned to him. Edward, are you sure youre ok around garlic? I waved a few cloves near him. Edward rolled his eyes. Honestly, Bella. Youre too easy, I laughed. I know how much you love all those Hellmouth references, sexy vampire clichs, and Count von Count from Sesame Street. Edward lifted a finger to correct me, Actually, that last one is pretty accurate. We vampires really do love our numbers. I dissolved into giggles and filled a pot with water for the pasta. Edward watched me as I moved around the kitchen, chopping vegetables, making meatballs, stirring the sauce. I felt his cold hands sneak around my waist. Darling, you really are too delicious in this outfit. I am not sure I can keep my hands off of you long enough to let you eat. I turned to face him, kissing his lips slowly. I was enjoying his agony immensely. Hold that thought. Just give me thirty minutes. He pressed his body against me, his erection straining his boxer briefs. I looked down at him and licked my lips. Im absolutely starving, I whispered into his ear, flicking my tongue against his earlobe. Edward moaned, Bella. Jesus. Im going to go put some clothes on. I kissed him again and turned back to my cooking, swaying my hips to the sound of Aretha singing Aint No Way floating in from the living room. Edward came back in and stood in the doorway for a few minutes, watching me. He slowly stalked towards me, grabbed my hips again, and pushed his now-clothed body against my ass. Has it been thirty minutes yet? I turned again and slid my hand against his cock, knowing full well he knew exactly how many minutes had elapsed. He moaned into my neck.

No, sweetheart. Patience. I winked at him and he buried his face in my neck, then sucked on my earlobe, making the flesh from my ear to my collarbone tingle deliciously. Edward. Sit. He groaned and left the room again, only to return a few moments later with a bottle of red wine in his hands. He opened the bottle, poured me a glass, and set it down on the counter next to me. I fear this will be completely wasted on my palate. I eyed the glass doubtfully, but took a sip and moaned. It was amazing. Or maybe not. I kissed him in thanks, watching as he walked to the island and pulled himself up to sit on the counter. I finished up the cooking, dancing slowly to the music, humming to myself. I could feel Edward watching me quietly, enjoying the scene. I loved the comfort of our silence together. I piled some pasta on a plate next to my salad and bread. I refilled my wine and carried the glass with the plate over to the table. Edward joined me. He began fidgeting with a napkin ring and I chuckled at the completely unnecessary movement, the human habit he had incorporated so convincingly. I looked at my food and a thought occurred to me. Edward, when you drink blood. Whathappens to it? All the liquid, I mean. He looked up at me and smiled wickedly. I didnt know where his mind had gone, but I felt like I was missing something. Well, of course we need the liquid for venom, he purred. Yes, but how much of that do you actually everget rid of? I knew vampires did not need human moments and probably swallowed more venom than they ever released. He chuckled, As you know my love, we also haveother fluids. He winked at me. I felt a hot blush creep up my neck. Of course, I mumbled, stuffing a forkful of salad into my mouth. He brushed his hand against my cheek. And the rest of the volume probably vaporizes through our skin when we run. Thats our theory, at least, he shrugged, spinning the napkin ring on his finger. I took another sip of wine, starting to feel a bit of the effects of the alcohol. I know thatyou know, human guysare always making it and so need to release theirfluid I trailed off, my question lingering in the air. Edward stifled a laugh, knowing what I was thinking. Yes? Edward. What, love? His face was pure innocence. I stared at him grumpily, knowing that he understood the question forming in my head. So, my question is, do vampires need toyou knowrelease it? I raised my eyebrows and made a vague hand-job gesture.

He laughed, I imagine we do. My mind immediately formed the follow-up question, the image suddenly consuming my brain. I felt the rush of heat between my legs a moment before Edward registered my bodys reaction. I heard him let out a low growl. And you were never with anyone before me. Soyou Edward smiled at me and my legs actually began to tremble from the lust on his face. SoI what? As usual, he wanted to hear me say it. So do you ever? I waved my hands in the same vague gesture. Touch yourself? Of course, Bella, he laughed, reaching out to touch my face. Was that so hard? So to speak he said under his breath and laughed at his own joke. I felt like I might slip off my chair. Wow. It was all I could muster. Thats an image. I dont know why this surprised me. I figured vampires wouldnt really need anymaintenance. Dont you? He mimicked my tone and moved two of his fingers as if he were pushing them inside me, a gleam in his eye. On occasion, I mumbled into my wine glass. He moaned slightly, smiling, and leaned back in his chair. What? I asked. I still felt like I was missing something. He hesitated, looking at me, and then smiled. One night, soon after we returned from Italy, you were talking in your sleep and your hand slipped into your panties. It waswell, it was probably the only time I have ever literally fallen off a bed. Im usually a bit more on the coordinated side. I almost choked on my bite of food. Oh God, please tell me I didnt- You didnt, he assured me honestly. Not that I would have minded, my mind was practically begging you to do something once your hand moved beneath the fabric. You just put your hand there for a bit, and after a while you rolled over. My head sagged into my hands. Ughhh, I moaned. Edward laughed and lifted my chin up to meet my eyes. His eyes were reassuring, warm, and loving. It was, as you say, hot, Bella. Reluctantly, and without much remaining appetite, I turned back to my dinner. Edward watched me with the same seductive expression, seeming to be waiting for me to say something else. Another thought occurred to me. Did you evertouch yourself when I was sleeping next to you? My eyes met his; his eyes burned with lust. Yes, he laughed, seeming to know I was going to ask that. A couple of times. The first time was the night in question. A couple other times after hours of your requests to touch you in your sleepI had to take matters into my own hands. He chuckled again at his joke and licked his lips.

My breath whooshed out of me at this image, and I wavered on my chair. Bella? Are you going to fall out of your chair? The tables had turned. He was enjoying my agony too much now. No, well, maybe. I grinned at him. Im just a little overwhelmed by these images. And a bit tipsy, I think. Well, for the record, you are adorable tipsy. He leaned over and kissed my lips sweetly. Positively delicious. I looked up at him, smiling. If you bit me, would you get tipsy too? He leaned back from me, and narrowed his eyes. Not from the wine I dont know what came over me; the words burst out of my mouth: Do you ever think about how its going to happen, when you change me? He stopped breathing and closed his eyes. He sat perfectly still for awhile, before looking at me cautiously and asking Do you think about how its going to happen when I change you? Yes, I admitted, my gaze holding his. The damage had been done; I may as well be straight with him. Do you want to tell me how I do it? He leaned towards me but his face was unreadable. I could not tell if he was angry. The tension in the room had transitioned slightly from heavy sexual tension to something I couldnt quite identify. Not entirely uncomfortable, but different. I was grateful to the effects of the wine. Liquid courage. I thought about how Edward would change me often, and although my image of it had originally ranged over several possibilities, once I landed on the current image, it was impossible to imagine it any other way. Do you really want to know? I asked, giving him the chance to end this loaded conversation. I knew I wouldnt. Of course, my love. I want to know every thought you have. You know that. His voice was surprisingly soft, but I could not get a read on him. I wasnt sure if it was the wine or the subject matter. Well my eyes wandered to the ceiling, not sure how to phrase the relatively simple image. I decided to just put it plainly. You do it after weve made love. Im in your arms. Naked. Edward froze, staring at me, his face a mask of disbelief. The sexy vampire clich? You want me to make love to you and thenkill you? His voice was incredulous. He put his face in his hands. How very Bela Lugosi of me. Ill have to get a cape. Not kill me, Edward. Change me. I picked up my dishes and took them to the sink, blushing furiously. But that is what would happen if I had just finished making love to you and then tasted your blood.

Are you serious with this? His voice didnt sound angry, it sounded almost amused. In this scenario, youre going to make love to me and then - if I can even stop myself from draining you in my post-coital bliss - effectively be on fire for three days, you do know that right? Edward, you are not taking me seriously, I sighed. To the contrary, Bella, I am taking you entirely too seriously. I just dont want my making love to you to immediately precede death or, at best, excruciating burning pain. I generally think that does not lend itself to positive associations. I was embarrassed and regretted saying anything. Ugh, never mind. I cant explain it if youre going to make fun of me. Edward wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling my back against his chest. Im sorry. Bella, Im not trying to make fun of you. Justtell me why you want it to happen after we make love. Itskind of a big deal. His lips pressed against my neck. Its about intimacy, Edward. Making love with you is a total expression of how we feel about each other our words in action. Every time you touch me I realize this is forever, and I know that you are mine completely. Edward turned me to face him, murmuring my name against my neck. I struggled to continue. Your changing me is such a gift; you are telling me that you want me forever, that you want to make love to me forever. I just want to give myself completely to you in the process, so that you can feel, immediately before, what it means to me that you would do that for me. Edward pulled back and looked at me, realization dawning on his face. Is that how you see it, Bella? That Im giving you a gift? Yes, of course, I said simply. We had had this conversation before in different forms, but never really made much progress in understanding each other. I know that you will be giving up a lot to do that all the human things about me that drew you to me in the first place. And I know it will be hard for you. Of course, I know you want to be with me, but I know in some ways its also a sacrifice. So much so that I think we wouldnt even be having this conversation if it werent for our little Volturi problem. Edward was watching me, absorbing every word I said. He opened his mouth to speak and then closed it. The hesitating gesture was rare for him. I stood silent, waiting. Bella, he said and then stopped. He struggled to find words. Bella, I want you changed more than I can possibly explain. Its a gift for me. The waiting is killing me, too. I looked up at him, waiting for the but. It didnt come. What? I asked because no other words came to me. Edward shook his head, smiling at me, You wont lose the things I love about you. You will only gain the things I want you to have. The sacrifice human friends, your family - is only yours. His eyes searched my face for understanding. I guess I havent done a good job communicating that. I exhaled slowly. It finally sunk in, what he had been trying to say all this time, the root of his hesitation, his guilt, his concern.

But Bella, he said softly, I dont know if I can do it that way. Changing you isit is going to be very emotional for me. Making love to you ismore than emotional, he sighed, again struggling for the right words. I just dont know if I can do it that way. His head dropped against my shoulder. I knew this would be something that we would have to figure out in time. I was glad that the conversation had been started, but wanted to get back to our honeymoon, leaving our other worries behind us. We dont have to decide tonight, I whispered and kissed his cheek. Come with me. ***** I took his hand and led him out of the kitchen. I grabbed the blanket from the back of the couch in the living room and led Edward out onto the beach, where I spread the blanket on the fine white sand. The night was beautiful; warm and breezy, the sound of the ocean and wind soothing. Everything around us felt incredibly still. Edward looked at me and smiled, mouthing I love you. I began undressing before him, slowly. His eyes burned into my body but he stood perfectly still. I stripped down into my underwear, a simple white satin bra and matching panties. Edward reached for me and I went to him, standing on my toes to kiss his lips and his neck while his arms snaked around my waist, his hands resting on my lower back. I pulled his shirt over his head and licked my tongue over his nipple, biting it gently, then encouraged by his moan, more roughly. What does that feel like? I asked him, curious to know since I knew there would be no beautiful edge of pleasure and pain for him with me, at least while I was human. It feels amazing. I know the bite would feel harder to human flesh, but to me it is a beautiful, light sensationI dont think I can quite describe to you. Youll just have to see what I mean. I think youll be surprised how sensitive you will be after.... He let his words trail off but the meaning was clear. He kissed me hard, his tongue sliding along my lips, my breath ragged with the sensation. I raked my nails against his chest as I lowered to my knees in front of him. He watched me as I slowly unbuttoned his fly, and then lowering his pants down his hips. I pressed my lips against the cotton of his boxer briefs and blew gently, warm air against his cool skin. He moaned, and then said Yes. I helped him step out of his pants and lowered his briefs to the blanket, tossing them aside after he stepped out of them. His naked flesh was glorious in the moonlight. I gasped, letting my eyes rove up over his body. His hands lovingly stroked my hair and face. Our eyes met and the question I wanted to ask was clear on my face. Edward raised his eyebrows in his own question, but when I leaned forward and kissed him gently, he nodded slowly. I bent down, breathless, and carefully licked along his length, feeling my tongue slide over his smooth, cool flesh. His body smelled incredible. My hands gripped his base, and he stepped closer to

me at my fingers urging. I swirled my tongue around his head and he moaned my name; I could feel his legs trembling slightly. His left hand gently stroked my hair, his right arm lay at his side, his fist clenching and unclenching. The image of the restraint in that simple gesture made my entire body ache for him. I plunged my mouth over him, sucking hard, pulling my head back and down again, moaning with each stroke. My hands stroked what part of his flesh did not fit in my mouth. I devoured him, licking and sucking as my mind became completely lost in the feel and taste of him in my mouth. Edward whimpered my name over and over, in rhythm with my movements around him. His body was perfectly still except for his legs, which began trembling more and more as I felt him get harder in my mouth, close to climax. I looked up at him through my eyelashes; he was looking down at me, his mouth open, his eyes seemed lost in the sight of me sucking him. I increased my speed, taking him as deep into my mouth as I could, squeezing his base with my hands and moaning against him. Bella, Ill come he said, trying to step back. If you keep moving like this Ill come I held him to me by tightening my grip around him and shaking my head slightly. I wanted to feel his pleasure in me, like this. He started whispering, Oh God Oh God and gently held my head against him to still my movements as he cried my name, Bella, oh God, Bella, oh He pulsed into my mouth and I heard myself moaning around him as he came. He shuddered for a moment and then stood still, breathing deeply. I leaned back, dragging my tongue along him as I held him in my hands. I felt his hands under my arms lifting me up, and his lips crashed against mine while his arms crushed me to his chest. Bellathat was the single most sensual thing Ive ever seen. That was amazing, I breathed against him. Did you likedoing that? His hand reached to my panties, sliding them to the side and touching his fingers to my wet flesh. He groaned, not needing me to answer. His fingers moved against me, stroking one finger along my clit. I felt him grow hard against me, and I looked up at him as my mouth fell open. Vampire, he whispered by way of explanation and smiled impishly. Edwardwould you get behind me? I asked, looking at him apprehensively. He stared back at me with burning eyes. He growled, low in his throat and kissed my lips, whispering my name. He pulled back and looked at me. I seem to remember that vision making me quite wild He grinned. You were serious, love it did turn you on, his voice was full of wonder. I nodded and turned around, unhooking my bra and lowering my panties before him, bending over at my waist. He groaned and stepped towards me, putting his hands on my hips, rubbing himself against my backside. We lowered ourselves to the blanket, and he paused at my entrance. I knew he needed me to begin. I pushed back against him, taking him into me. He began to move as his hands stroked my hips. He hit an area inside me that made me cry out in pleasure and I was immediately lost in the sensation, arching my back to him. My response made him move faster,

deeper. He reached around and grazed my clit and then hesitated, reaching forward and grabbing one of my hands instead, pulling my own hand back to my body while he pulled his hips back slightly to take some weight off my other hand. I could feel the pressure of him moving inside me against my fingers. My skin was wet and warm under my hand, and his fingers rested on top of mine, feeling how I touched myself. He leaned over me, whispering in my ear, God Bella, you are so unbelievably sensual, how you touch yourself... I have wanted to see you do this for so long... He licked the back of my neck and I arched to him crying out. He trailed his tongue down my back, leaving the line of skin pulsing and sensitive. He moved both hands to my hips and pushed faster in me. I can see your arm moving, I can feel your handoh God Bella you are so beautiful I could only gasp, his voice made me crazy with need. I felt myself getting close and knew he was too he grew harder and his movements became faster, his moans closer together. Our climaxes overtook us together, our bodies pulsing in unison, our cries echoing through the night. His movements slowed in me, stroking me from the inside as we came down. He moved away from me and I rolled onto my back, bending my knees, and looking at him kneeling above me. He sat back against his heels and stared at me like this for a long moment, letting his eyes move up and down the length of my body, his hands resting on my knees. Neither of us spoke and my heart felt like it was too big for my body. Tears filled my eyes and spilled over; I was completely overwhelmed with what was happening between us; every moment I felt like I was falling in love with him again. I had everything I needed and would never get enough of this man. I still couldnt shake the fear that it would end somehow. Edward didnt say anything, he just looked at me. I knew my tears communicated a level of obsessive love that his eyes could not. He lowered himself between my legs and put his mouth against mine, kissing me deeply. *****

Chapter 7: Oxygen We came in from the beach and I climbed into bed as Edward dressed for a hunt. I was exhausted, he needed to run. We didnt speak much; our silence was full of all of the passion that neither of us could find words to express. Edward kissed me gently and slipped out the door, with promises to return before I awoke. As soon as his figure disappeared, I climbed out of bed and walked over to the suitcase. I searched for the small satin bag containing the beautiful red negligee. I pulled the soft material over my body, my skin still hypersensitive from Edwards fevered kisses on the beach. I looked at the matching crotchless panties wearily and put them back into the bag. I crawled into bed, burrowing into the covers and luxuriating in the feather pillows as sleep took hold of me immediately.

***** I woke up and felt Edwards cool arms around me. He was on top of the covers, not wanting to disturb my cozy sleep. Mmmm, I moaned into his chest, reaching for him. He leaned down to me and pressed his lips to mine softly. His fingers touched my hair, my cheeks, my jaw. His thumb dragged along my lower lip. Bella, its only two. Sleep. His voice was deep and calm. A cold whisper against my ear. My body responded immediately and Edward chuckled, I should have just kept my mouth shut, it appears. I pulled him on top of me, pulling his shirt over his head, and moving my hands up his shoulders to his neck, holding his face to mine. I still felt half-asleep; my body felt slow and warm. Edward sat up and pulled off his jeans then pulled back the covers to climb in with me and gasped. Bella. He kneeled on the bed next to me, gazing at my body in the red lace. He crawled towards me and straddled me over my knees, his thighs on either side of mine. My arms snaked above my head, stretching. Edward held his breath and then exhaled in a long sigh. He lowered his hands onto my thighs, a touch so soft I could barely feel his fingers. He pressed his hands against my skin and pushed them upwards to the hem of the negligee, just below my hips. He pushed the fabric up slightly, his hands now on either side of my hips as his thumbs stroked the soft flesh just inside my hipbones below my navel. His thumbs lingered over my pulse point. I kept my arms above my head, stretching my body for him to explore. My eyes were still clouded with sleep and the darkness of the room; the only light coming in was from the sliver of a moon outside. Edwards body was luminescent and I felt heavy with the sensuality of my slow exhausted muscles combined with Edwards deliberate and reverent touches. He smoothed the lace down back over my hips and ran his fingers over the lace, up my abdomen, to my breasts, taking both in his hands and massaging them softly while moaning my name. His erection rested against my legs and he stared at my lips. Other than my breathing, I still hadnt moved. I wanted him to move me how he wanted. As if reading my thoughts, Edward turned us over in a quick movement, lying on his back with my body over his. He pushed the lace against my skin, feeling my skin beneath the texture of the soft garment. My hips straddled his waist but his knees were bent behind my back. Edward I whispered, pushing my back against his legs, willing him to lower his knees and let me ride him. He lifted my hips and just as I thought he was going to lower me over him and enter me, he lifted my hips above his face, my knees hovering on either side of his head as his eyes met mine. Bella, I need this. His voice was almost pained, and I could barely comprehend what was happening. My head was clouded with the heat of his words and the chill of his breath on my thighs. My sex was just inches from his face. God Bella, I need this so much. My hips shook in his hands and took all the control I had to not push against his hands and lower myself firmly onto him. I resisted, letting him drive the moment as my breath came out hard and fast.

I think it will be easier like this, the first time, to keep the venom minimal on you. Gravity he mumbled, staring at my body above him. He lowered his hands but I planted my knees on either side of his head, watching him. He urged me down onto him with one hand on my outer thigh, the other hand holding my other leg on my inner thigh. His cold tongue dragged along my flesh, and he moaned loudly against me as he convulsed at the contact. I cried out, pushing my hips down against him for a moment before pulling my body back up, again kneeling above him. My eyes clamped shut and my head fell back in complete ecstasy. His mouth had been cold, like a strong mint. But it was more than that: his touch made me feel more than I ever had, it was almost as if I suddenly had exponentially more nerve endings where his tongue had touched me. Even more, the feeling was spreading from where his tongue had immediately touched my flesh, all along inside me and down my thighs. My body was on cold fire, a beautiful, sparkling cold fire. It was as if my entire body was as sensitive as that one small part of me. I was, unbelievably, already on the edge of climax with just the memory of his mouth on me and the feeling of the venom spreading over my flesh. I registered that my hips were moving above him and I was moaning for more. Edward was saying my name, more urgently. I only heard him say it twice. Bella. Bella. His hands rubbed my thighs insistently. I opened my eyes and looked down at him as the sensation faded and I came back down from orbit. Edward. Oh my God. Bella? Did I hurt you? His eyes were worried and only started to relax when he saw my hungry expression. No, I gasped. I was completely unable to form words. My mouth hung open; I stared at him in shock before breaking out into a huge smile, and I exhaled forcefully, catching my breath. No, Edward I need more. I put my hands on his face and then against my own chest, still trying to calm my breathing. I could sense his hips buck behind me in response to my words and his hands clenched my hips almost reflexively. He murmured my name, hungrily kissing and licking the inside of my thighs while I struggled to regain my composure. I wasnt sure how I was going to survive this and if my heart was literally going to explode in my chest when his tongue met my sex again. I had no idea what was going on in his head. All I knew was that I needed to feel that again, and now. His hands urged me to lower my body again and I immediately complied. His lips were parted and felt soft as he enveloped my clit completely. His tongue swirled around me rhythmically. I gasped, feeling unable to breathe, but knowing that really my breath was just coming fast and hard again. There werent words to describe the feeling my orgasm immediately enveloped me, jerking my spine backwards, and I would have fallen over if he hadnt been holding onto my thighs with a firm grip. I could feel his fingers bruising me and I didnt care. I cried out to Edward, incoherent, telling him I was coming, hard. He groaned against me as his mouth became frantic and urgent.

I heard him groan, My God Bellayes And then my orgasm was back, again, the luscious cold flush covering my entire body, every inch of my skin, and I was moaning his name, begging him, pleading with him to never stop, never let me go. Never, Bella. he breathed against me. Whenever I thought that an orgasm had begun, I realized it had never stopped and my hips rocked over Edwards mouth as he licked my flesh and slid his tongue inside me. Our movements were a symphony, perfectly aligned. I felt him moaning, could feel his grip on my legs but I couldnt look down at him, couldnt make my head do anything but arch backwards. My body was frozen above him, locked in a single, beautiful, endless climax. My skin felt like it was covered in small snowflakes, but my sex was burning against Edwards mouth. I knew he was moving his lips and his tongue; I felt pressure inside me, two maybe three of his fingers were pushing inside me as his tongue thrust against me. But these actions were only estimates in my head. I was no more able to pinpoint his exact movements than I would have been able to point north or even be able to provide my name if asked. I reached behind me and grabbed his hard cock in my hand, running my hand from bottom to top. I whimpered at the liquid seeping from his tip, at the way his hips arched into my hand, and my need for him exploded with that contact. Everything went black. ***** I heard only the sound of my own heartbeat racing, my breath ragged in my chest. My arms and legs felt like lead. Bella. Edwards voice sounded far away. Bella. Closer. Bella. Right next to me. I opened my eyes, blinking as I tried to make out his form in the dark room. Edward exhaled and smiled down at me. What happened? I asked, dazed. I felt deliciously heavy. Suddenly a laugh formed in my chest as the moment flashed into my head and I realized that I had literally passed out while Edward had been licking me. You scared the hell out of me when you collapsed backwards against me. But then I just realized you had hyperventilated. He stroked my face, and I realized he was unable to stop smiling. Im that good, he laughed and the sound was deep and happy. Youre so telling Emmett about this, arent you? I asked, laughing and putting my hands over my face to collect myself. His head fell back against the pillow next to me and his laughter echoed off the walls. Not a chance. The vision of you over me he sighed, is for me alone to remember every second of every day. His words made me blush hot with desire. We are going to need to work on getting my breathing under control. That, I may need you to do for days, I said silkily, stretching my body next to him and

crawling on top of him. I will be begging you, he replied, suddenly serious. His eyes were on fire. Bella, I cant find words to describe what you feel like against my lips. I looked down at him and smiled. My body still felt like a shimmering pool of cool water. Tell me that feeling doesnt go away. Im never becoming a vampire if that goes away. I was only half joking. *****

Chapter 8: Edward's Version I leaned back against Edward's chest, his legs stretched out alongside mine on the couch, his arms wrapped around my shoulders. Chopin played softly throughout the room and a bowl of grapes was perched on my lap; I snacked lazily. Edward's hands played along with the music on my arms. It was a quiet moment after an unforgettable night. I felt him laughing behind me silently as he bent to graze his lips along my jaw. "How much longer?" I tried to sound grumpy but my attempt at mock annoyance was pitiful. "Eternity," he chuckled. "I will never stop enjoying those memories." His arms tightened around me and his lips brushed against my ear. I will never forget how you looked over me. We had tried again last night. I had been insatiable, needing his mouth on me again. He did not require any convincing, but had murmured against my ear that he was pretty sure I would have the same reaction. He was right. I hyperventilated and passed out cold. Again. Afterwards he had sung my lullaby, his occasional chuckle interrupting his melody, and each time I groaned in embarrassment . And each time he thanked me for the vision he would turn to in times of darkness before dissolving into laughter. I fell asleep in his arms, waking to his delicious smell and his delirious smile. He couldn't contain his bliss. He couldn't keep his lips off of me. It was adorable. I stood up and reached for his hand. Lets go for a walk. Edward feigned shock. Leavethe house? I giggled. Yes. Outside. Fresh air. No sex. Im really not sure my ego can handle any more blackouts. He growled in my ear and grabbed me around my waist. You would never deny me, would you my Bella? I leaned into him, kissing his cheek. I would never, my love. Our lips met in a tender kiss and our eyes met in a knowing gaze. I had never seen Edward close his eyes when he touched me.

***** We walked along the beach, splashing each other with water. Edward looked edible in deep blue swim trunks, his hair messy and sexy. He picked me up and took off running as the air whipped past us. I wrapped my legs around his waist and I could tell by the way he moved that he loved to run. When he put me down he was smiling at me and kissed me hard. I am beyond happy, he said, simply. His hands ran down my back, and came to rest on my bottom, his fingers playing at the edge of my bikini. I closed my eyes at his words, feeling the breeze against my face, wishing I could stop time. I looked around us. We were several yards into some thick forested area off the beach. Ahead I could see a large clearing and a deer grazing. How big is this island? I asked. I really havent let you out of the house much, have I? He looked guilty and laughed. Its several hundred acres. There is another cabin at the other end. He pointed the direction he meant. Its a little bit more rustic, but Esme has plans to fix it up for when were all here together sometime. How often do you come here? I asked, hoping we could come back often. We had been on the island for almost a week. It already felt like our home, like it belonged to us. A couple times a year, at most. He looked down at me with a tender expression. I imagine well come more often, now. It holds a slightly more sentimental place in my heart after what weve made here. He smiled softly at the relief on my face. What do you hunt here? I asked, looking around, wondering if there was anything other than deer. I wasnt even sure how they got here. He read my expression. There wasnt much here before Carlisle bought the island. Birds, snakes, insects. Carlisle made it a bit of a nature preserve. He reintroduced native wolves and deer and some South American rodents to the island. We hunt the wolves and deer. Whichever population needs culling, thats what we hunt. He looked down at me and anticipated my question. Im hunting wolves this trip. There are too many right now. I took this in, appreciating the simplicity of the solution. They had such an organized existence, such a structured life. In many ways I could tell it could feel lonely and isolated, but they had done what they could to create a world, a comfortable world, for themselves. Edward was watching me and his expression grew frustrated as it did sometimes when he wanted to read my thoughts. Bella, are you scared? I looked up at him, surprised. Not at all. Quite the opposite actually. Im justimpressed with the level of detail that you all put into setting up a world for yourselves. Mmmm, he sighed and nodded. Its all Carlisle and Esme. The rest of us would be lost without them. He looked around. Do you think about life after youve changed? What do you want to do? His voice was soft.

I have no idea what Ill feel like, Edward. You have far more experience in that area than I do. I just want to be with you. I smiled at up at him and shielded my eyes from the sun with my hand. Where do you think you want to live? he asked. Wherever you and our family are. I shrugged. You have no thoughts on what you would like to do, after youve settled in a bit? he pressed. Well, I can guarantee that Id like a break from high school. I laughed dryly. Perhaps with your and Carlisles medical experience we can do some humanitarian work somewhere? He smiled at me and then laughed. Wait, you need a break from high school? Bella, tell me about it. He tickled my sides. So, you dont think youll miss the Brain Trust? I laughed. You mean Jessica and Lauren? Umthatd be no. His smile was crooked and he leaned to kiss my nose. We walked for a bit then stopped and I leaned against a tree. He moved towards me and pressed his hands against the trunk on either side of my head. He leaned in and kissed me gently at first, but our hunger took over and he cupped my face as his tongue pressed against my lips, urging me to open to him. He pulled back and watched me, studying my face. I knew he wanted to ask me something but was trying to get a read on me first. I looked at his mouth and smiled, encouraging him to ask. About your sexy vampire fantasy He broke into a teasing grin. I groaned. Okay, Edward, seriously. I told you what I think about. I told you why its what I want. Enough with the teasing and torture. His expression turned serious and he kissed me once, gently. I am not trying to torture you. Were just in different places about this, and it is a big deal. I have been avoiding the topic long enough. Its something that should be discussed andplanned. There was a tightness in his voice I could not identify. I searched his eyes for a clue to his thoughts, but couldnt figure out what rested beneath his words. I nodded, waiting. So, tell me your version. He turned his head away but his eyes darted back to me, gauging my mood. I just think it is going to be very emotional for me. Good emotional, Bella. But stilloverwhelming. Ive never done it before, and its you. He smiled weakly at me, anxious that I understand. I always assumed Carlisle would be with me, in case I couldnt stop I turned his face to mine. Is that still something you worry about? Even after I looked back towards the house where all of our passion had been released: where he had made love to me every day since he married me, where he had trusted himself to let me take him into my mouth, and where just last night he had tasted me as a lover tastes his beloved. Of course. His expression was pained.

So, you want to go back to Forks and change me with Carlisle there. In his office? In the basement? In the basement, yes. Wow, I muttered. Our versions could not be more different, could they? He said something quietly, and then shook his head. No, Bella. I cant do it alone. I took his hand and we kept walking, silence enveloping us as we each let our thoughts wander. Bella? Tell me more, he whispered. I looked at him, not sure what he meant. Sexy vampire...? He smiled and I laughed in spite of myself. I already explained it. I shrugged, not sure if he hadnt understood me the other night, or just wanted to know more about my feelings so he could find ways around them. He squeezed my hand, encouraging me to keep talking. It may be nave and idealistic, it may be grounded nowhere near reality. But Ive given myself to you in marriage; I have given you my body in love. I want to have those things surrounding us when you give meeternity. The desire for what I described made my chest ache. And we plan this night? We talk about it beforehand? he asked, studying me. No, actually, I admitted. I had nothing to lose in telling him the truth. Im ready anytime. You need to know that. The whole point is for you to take me when Im completely yours, not when Im thinking about it, wondering how it will feel Im completely yours always, but especially when we make love. I trust you, otherwise I wouldnt want to do this. My words trailed off and I kicked a stick on the path. He exhaled slowly and turned his face towards the sky. His skin shimmered in the sun and I could not tear my eyes away from his beauty as his jaw clenched with his thoughts. He stopped walking and pulled me to him, leaning down and covering my mouth with his. The kiss was slow and soft, and he placed both palms on either side of my face. That really does sound beautiful, Bella. Im so sorry. He kissed me again. It pains me to deny you anything. I leaned into his chest, inhaling his smell. Disappointment tugged at the edge of my mind, but more than anything I just felt relieved that we could talk about this without fighting. It was liberating to be so honest and calm discussing a topic that had once created such tension. ***** We headed back to the house when the sun began to set and goose bumps covered my arms. I made a light dinner and climbed into bed early when Edward insisted I get more sleep. I didnt resist; I was exhausted. I slipped on a soft satin tank and panties and crawled under the covers. Edward rolled me onto my stomach and rubbed my back, easing the tension in my tight muscles. I fell asleep to the sound of him humming in my ear.

***** I woke to the feeling of fingers touching me between my legs, moving slowly. It wasnt the sensation of fingers on me but the temperature of the fingers that make me bolt awake. It was pitch dark in the room and took my eyes a moment to adapt. I realized my hand was underneath my underwear, touching my very wet skin and my knees were bent and spread. I looked up and saw Edward, naked, kneeling between my legs. He held his cock against my thigh, slowly moving it along my skin. Please dont stop, Bella. His tone was desperate. Come to me. I reached for him but he shook his head and lowered my panties, inhaling deeply. He put my hand back between my legs. Please, dont stop. He repeated, taking himself into his hand, stroking himself slowly. Ive wanted to do this for so long. It was one of the most erotic things I had ever seen: Edward kneeling above me, his hand gripping his hard cock, his eyes watching me as I touched myself. I moaned and slowly rubbed my clit, still feeling heavy and sensual from sleep. I couldnt tear my eyes from the sight of him moving his hand over his hard flesh, his strong forearm flexing with the movement. The sight of his arm muscles moving underneath his skin made me cry out to him. His hand moved faster as his eyes fixed on the movements of my hand. Is this how you touch yourself when you think of me? he asked quietly. I moved one hand to my breast and squeezed my nipple, and dipped the fingers of my other hand into my wetness, before spreading it around. I nodded as he watched. Yes. What do you think about? What am I doing to you? His voice was hardly above a whisper and his words were barely controlled. Your hands are touching me. I slid one finger, and then another inside my pussy and moaned his name. Your fingers are inside me, Edward. I was breathless and began moving my hand faster, pinching my nipple harder. Fuck, Bella. He pumped his hand along his length as his other hand stroked my thigh. I love touching you. Your sweet pussy is so soft, always so wet for me. What do you think about, baby? I asked him. I could feel myself getting close, but wanted to hold out as long as I could, to savor the image of him over me. Your mouth on me, licking me, taking me in. Now I know how you look up at me when you suck on me he groaned and began moving his hips with his hand. Sometimes I think about bending you over something and taking you from behind, feeling how tight you are I want to see you come I gasped. Please Edward, let me see you come for me. He groaned and stroked himself harder as his free hand pushed my knee up, spreading my legs

wider for him. His eyes grew dark with ecstasy. Bella, you are so beautiful. Your body is so beautiful. Look at youI have wanted to see you like this for so long His gaze burned into my flesh and his legs began to tremble. Please Edward I want to watch you I begged him, pushing my hips off the bed against my hand, arching my back, and rubbing my palm hard against my clit. I want to feel it, I whispered. He moaned when I said that, sliding closer to me on his knees. You want to feel it, Bella? Now? I nodded and my breath caught in my throat. He cried out, stroking himself fast and hard as he stared at my hand moving over my skin. He began to come, first pulsing and finally spilling onto my stomach and breasts. His eyes locked with mine in his climax. The feel of his release, of the cool liquid on my chest set me off and my orgasm hit me hard, causing my hips to buck up against the bed and throwing my head back into the pillow. He pinned my hands above my head and pushed into me, immediately hard again, moaning my name, and licking my neck as he began to thrust. I cried out as my orgasm continued and brought my legs up to my sides, pulling him closer. He lifted my leg and put it over his shoulder, moving deep in me as his pubic bone rubbed against my clit. His eyes were focused on my mouth and small grunts escaped his lips with every thrust. I knew I was close again and he whispered in my ear, pushing me closer to climax. I will never get enough of you; I will never stop making love to you, my Bella I lost myself in the feeling of him against me, his beautiful pale body moving above me in the moonlight. I put my hands on his face and he turned his head and licked my fingers clean. He pulled his face back to watch me and I lost myself in the sight of his gorgeous mouth whispering my name. My climax gripped me and pulled a long cry out of me as I spasmed all around him, moaning my love for my husband, my Edward. He slowed down and kissed me deeply, pulling my leg down from his shoulder and wrapping my legs around his waist. He rocked in me slowly, calming my body down with his. Finally, he stilled in me and our breathing was the only sound in the room. His head lowered to my shoulder as he supported his weight over me with his forearms near my head. I fell asleep with him inside me as his cool body covered me in the warm night. *****

Chapter 9: Edwards POV (Chapters 6 & 7) We dont have to decide tonight. Bella whispered and kissed my cheek. Come with me. ***** She led me through the living room and outside onto the beach. My mind was reeling the entire time. I knew the wine had allowed her to let her guard down to ask me about changing her. I didnt realize how much it would shake me. Although I had accepted its inevitability, and had realized that she wanted to be changed as much as I wanted it for us, I was still surprised to hear how she wanted

it to happen. But I dont know why I was surprised. Our relationship had completely transitioned once we made love; all of our other fantasies had been completely compatible. I should not have expected this one to be any different. I just knew I couldnt let her know how I felt on this one matter. I felt a crushing pang of guilt for lying to Bella. If she knew how much her words had affected me, I knew she would eventually persuade me. As much as I wanted it, as much as I had dreamed about exactly what she described, I knew it would be better to have Carlisle close by, have the security of the house around us, the support of my family. I would not risk her life. ***** I blinked hard to clear my thoughts. Bella was spreading the blanket out on the sand before us, the wind blowing her hair around her shoulders, her scent drifting to me, enveloping me. I inhaled deeply, easily lost in her. She turned to me and smiled, a pink flush coloring her cheeks as her hand hesitated at the hem of her tank top and she watched my face. The green of her top had made me dizzy earlier; it complimented the darkness of her eyes and hair, her creamy skin was luminescent against the soft fabric. She lifted her hands slowly, raising the shirt over her head. I could hear her heartbeat accelerating in excitement, her breath low and short in her chest. Her flat stomach was exposed followed by her breasts round and beautiful, spilling over a white satin bra. She lowered her skirt, wiggling playfully as she lowered it over her soft, slim hips. Her body hummed in the night air. She stepped out of her clothing gracefully really, so beautifully, her posture communicating her struggle to be confident and not self-conscious under my gaze. I smiled at her, always in awe of her. Bellas movements had their own song, their own rhythm. She stood before me in her underwear: vulnerable, beautiful, mine. My body hardened against my jeans and I inhaled deeply again to gauge her bodys reaction to her own beautiful strip tease. I could smell her, taste her in the air. Her arousal smelled different than her skin; still floral, and fruity, but with something deeper, lustier. Maybe almonds. Maybe some ocean. I couldnt pinpoint the loamy, soft smell. The exact components eluded me. I spent hours the last several nights watching Bella sleep, thinking about how she smelled when I made love to her. Her scent when she was aroused and the taste of her in the air drove me to distraction. My entire body was aching for her. I reached for her and she stepped to me, straining up to kiss my lips. Her beautiful full mouth was warm and full, and the wine on her lips hardly masked her delicious flavor; berry, flowers, Bella. I rested my hands above the curve of her bottom, sensing the tension in her lower back. She needed more sleep. I was not letting her rest enough. Her heart was hammering in her chest a nervous beat, not unlike the first night we made love. She was excited, but nervous about something. I knew all of Bellas heartbeats. I could read her heart beating without even thinking about it anymore. She lifted my shirt over my head and bent to lightly graze her teeth against my nipple. The sensation of her warm breath, her teeth really, such soft teeth nibbling at my flesh, set my skin ablaze. I let a moan escape my lips a meaningful release; in Bellas presence I had to work to not moan out loud constantly. Most of the time it was too low for her to hear, but it was almost continuous when she was near me, touching me. She bit me harder, asking me how it felt.

I tried to convey accurately what it felt like to have her touch me that way, knowing the exercise the attempt to find the right description was completely futile. I knew once shed changed she would understand. Everything would feel different, stronger, and more intense, to a degree that was impossible to communicate. I felt the familiar tug in my stomach of needing her changed, needing her to be able to see what she does to me. Needing to understand how completely I love her, how obsessively I worship her. Bella dragged her hands down my chest, her small warm fingers digging into my hard skin. I felt my cock pulse in need, needing her to envelop me, however she wanted. Please take me in you, I said, too quietly for her to register. I need to be in you. I realized where she was headed as she slid down my body to kneel in front of me. I watched her unbutton my pants, frozen at the image she gave me. Bella was sublime below me, her small frame on the ground communicated such need, such utter devotion. I choked back a dry sob; the sight of her kneeling before me felt so backwards, so wrong, and yet I was unable to protest, wanting what she was offering so much it made my chest ache with desire. She leaned forward and put her mouth against my boxers and blew a hot breath onto me. The warm air wrapped around my cock, delicious and intoxicating. I could hear her pulse throbbing in her pussy, I could smell her excitement building. She lowered my boxers and looked up at me. My body shuddered as her dark eyes, consumed with lust, met mine and begged me to tell her it was okay, that I could handle her mouth on me. I nodded, unable to form the words. Her tongue ran along my length, hot and wet. So hot, so unbelievably wet. It was all I could do to not explode and I clenched my hand at my side to keep my hips from moving in her delicate mouth. Her tiny hands wrapped around my base, and I heard her inhale deeply. I moaned her name, and reached to touch her hair. She looked up at my hips and gasped, seeing something that set her off. Her mouth dove down my length, sucking deliciously: warm, soft, my wife. I could barely keep myself together; I wanted to lose myself in the feeling but didnt want to move a muscle. I could only whimper her name over and over. Her full lips wrapped around me, her mouth took me in, her tongue swirled around me and my body throbbed inside of her. Did she feel how wildly I throbbed against her tongue? Every flick of her soft tongue sent shockwaves down my legs, making them tremble and burn. I felt it building in me, the hot sensation moving closer to my groin, the ecstasy almost unbearable. So soft, Oh God Bella, your mouth is so soft I murmured too quietly for her to hear. My skin was on fire, a warm pulse building inside of me as I watched her move on me, her mouth vibrating against me as she moaned, taking me deep into her mouth. Her soft hands squeezed and kneaded my base and I felt myself starting to climax. I wanted to warn her. She didnt have to take my release in her mouth. Bella, Ill come I said, trying to step back. If you keep moving like this Ill climax She gripped my cock and shook her head quickly, fighting my movement away from her with a flash in her eyes. She wanted me to come in her. The realization was too much for me and I let go. Oh God Oh God As gently as possible I touched her head to still her movements as I exploded in her, my release pulsing into her mouth as I cried out her name. She kept her mouth on me mercifully, swallowing ravenously, before slowly bringing me down from my climax with gentle

kisses and licks. A crushing love overtook me and I lifted her to me, kissing her wildly, wishing there was some language that could convey my complete, mad adoration. Bella I breathed, knowing the words didnt even come close to describing what she just did for me, that was the single most sensual thing Ive ever seen. That was amazing. Her breath was hot against my chest; I could smell myself on her lips and wanted to devour her. Did you likedoing that? I asked, knowing the answer, but needing to touch her soft flesh, the flesh I had come to read perfectly. I pushed my hand into her drenched panties, feeling my fingers slip easily between her folds. I felt her pulse against my palm and knew she was excited to the point that she would climax quickly and hard when I touched her. Her body sang to me. I groaned, needing her again already as I began stroking her. She was surprised I was hard again. Vampire. I said simply. She would know soon enough that I could and would want to make love for days on end. Her voice was soft against my neck as she asked me to enter her from behind. My mind reeled back to the night I took her so forcefully, the night I had spent many hours thereafter thinking about. I knew she wanted us to be able to find release in each other. I also knew that I could read her bodys cues better than I could read any mind, that her body told me when I had pushed hard enough, deep enough, grabbed with enough force. I growled against her lips, whispering her name and gazing at her exquisite face. That position had made me wild the other night. I grinned at the realization that it did turn her on, and told her so. My beautiful, sexy Bella. She turned around and removed her bra and panties, lowering her underwear down her legs by bending only at the waist, deliciously pushing her bottom towards me. Would I ever take her that way? A wave of her arousal came crashing towards me and I swallowed, steadying my reaction. I came up behind her, rubbed myself against her backside and she lowered us to the ground, getting on her knees before me. I pressed against her and could feel the pulse at her entrance. Her heart was racing with need; she wanted me inside of her. I waited for her to motion for me to move forward, wanting this time to be driven by her desire. She backed up against me, her wet folds devouring and squeezing my erection. I moaned and pushed forward into her, feeling her stretch to accommodate me. I angled my body down to hit her where I knew she was most sensitive, where I knew her body would react with contracting muscles around me, blood flow to the front of her body, a hiccup in her heart rate. I pressed against that spot, listening to her gorgeous moan, her racing heart; needing to consume her. I stroked my finger across her clit, realizing I needed to initiate the fantasy I had to see how Bella touched herself when she thought of me. I brought her hand to her pussy and held my hand over hers as she stroked herself, first slowly, and then feverishly, moaning my name and arching her back in a deliciously primal posture. God Bella, you are so unbelievably sensual, how you touch yourself... I have wanted to see you do this for so long I moaned into her ear, licking down her back. The sight of her arm moving against her body drove me to distraction. I grabbed her hips and thrust into her, just to the point that I felt

her body give against me, no more. I can see your arm moving, I can feel your hand I murmured. Oh God Bella you are so beautiful Her body clamped down on my cock as her walls convulsed around me. I came hard into her, crying out her name, our voices mixing in the night. I slowed my movements as we steadied ourselves, feeling her skin against mine as I came down. I pulled out of her slowly and she turned over to lie in front of me, her knees bent, her hands folded across her stomach, her chest heaving. I leaned back against my heels, watching her breathe and listening to the heartbeat that broke my heart, the beat that told me she was happier than she could articulate, but terrified to love so muchso overwhelmed with it all sometimes. Most of all still worried that I would go away again. A heavy beat, hard and deep inside her chest. Tears filled her eyes and ran down her temples as she looked at me, her body shaking with need for reassurance. I could only stare in wonder at her, loving her beyond description, beyond sanity. I felt a dry sob rising in my throat and leaned down, spreading Bellas legs to lay on her, covering her mouth with mine, whispering to her about my need, my love, my complete and eternal devotion. ***** Much later I returned from my hunt to find Bella asleep buried in blankets. I wrapped my arms around her and told her again the story of how I fell in love with her. I told her how I felt when I was near her, how her body felt underneath mine when we made love. I told her how sorry I was that I left her and how I would work to earn her forgiveness every day we had together. I told her I was sorry I could not give her a family. I told her about my hunt. I told her everythingjust as I did every night. She moaned in her sleep and turned to me, wrapping her arms around my neck. I kissed her softly, and against my better judgment touched her face, hair, beautiful full lips. She stirred and I urged her to go back to sleep. I cursed myself for interrupting her sleep yet again. Her body responded to my voice with a rush of heat between her legs, her beautiful scent intensifying her already thick flavor in the air. I should have just kept my mouth shut, it appears, I chuckled against her warm neck. She pulled me on top of her, slipping my shirt off before I climbed to the edge of the bed to undress. I returned to her and pulled back the covers. I gasped, Bella. She was dressed in a tiny red negligee that cupped her breasts perfectly and ran smooth down her body to the very tops of her thighs. I could see through the lace pattern to her naked flesh underneath. Her arms were raised above her head telling me she wanted to be ravaged. My hands roved over her body slowly, focusing on the feel of her silky skin under my fingers, on the smooth beauty of her curves. My mind was racing with all of the details of her responses, her heart rate, her pulse, the movement of her blood flowing to her skin under my touch. Every response told me where to touch, how to touch, how she needed to feel me. I noticed how soft she felt underneath my fingertips, how her breathing caught in her throat when I cupped her breasts, and how she sucked in a sharp breath when I grazed my thumb across her hardened nipples. She was unbelievably sublime.

I flipped us over so she was on top of me, pulling her legs to straddle my waist, my knees bent behind her. I was hard against her back, but more than anything I was desperate to taste her. I had waited so long, too long. She whispered my name and pushed back against my legs, eager to slide down over me. Instead, I lifted her up by her hips and brought her pussy directly above my face. The sensation of having her scent so close to me was intoxicating and for several moments I could not move. I was absolutely consumed with the sight of her above me soft and pink, glistening. More than anything, the smell of her filled my head. Bella, I need this I said simply, urgently. I took a deep breath to inhale as much of her scent as I could. My eyes moved obsessively over the sight above me: slick wet skin, creamy thighs next to my head, her breasts farther up, full and soft. She trembled in my hands. I explained that I thought it would be easier if she were above me, it would mean less venom would touch her flesh. We could at least see how it worked this way. I moved my hands but she held her body above me, straddling my face. Her breath was jagged and she shook with desire. I placed my hands on her thighs, urging her down to me, silently begging her to put her pussy onto my mouth. She lowered herself onto me and I dragged my tongue from her entrance up to her clitoris, pausing there, reeling. There werent words to describe the sensation of her soft flesh in my mouth, the taste of her floral, light, and something else, still unknown, but erotic, lusty on my tongue. My eyes never closed, but light exploded in my head as my entire world shifted to this moment, this smell, and this woman. I cried out, desiring her almost to the point of pain. Bellas hips bucked against me and she lifted her sex away from me. My senses crashed at the loss of her flesh on my lips. She was moaning, grinding, arching her back. Her breathing was irregular and fast. Her head fell back, and her legs shook hard against my head. I called her name. I called it again, and again. Bella looked down at me finally and said, Edward, Oh my God I rubbed my hands on her thighs, relieved that she was ok, but frantically needing to feel her again. I felt greedy and desperate. My love for her overrode my own selfish desire and I asked her if I hurt her. No, she said, smiling breathlessly. NoI need more. I felt my body convulse at her words, yes yes, and my hips bucked underneath her as I grabbed her thighs and urged her down onto me. I licked her thighs, sucked on her skin, called her name, begged her to come back to me. I felt nearly delirious. I pulled on her legs with more force than I would have otherwise used with her. I needed her on me. She lowered herself unsteadily and I ravaged her, sucking her clit into my mouth, licking her, kissing her, moaning against her. She cried out immediately, panting. Edward, please, dont stop, Im coming, oh God Edward, Im coming so hard, please dont stop The speed of her climax, her taste, her texture, her smell they all drove me wild. Her cries never ended and her heartbeat was faster than I had ever heard it before. I felt myself hard and leaking for her, needing to be inside her but nothing, nothing was better than the feel of her over me like this.

She almost fell backwards, but my fingers dug into her thighs to keep her planted on my face. I knew I was bruising her and I knew neither of us cared. I felt blood rushing to her sex and her flesh swelled against my lips. Her hips rocked in time with my tongue, as wave after wave of climax crashed over her, leaving her body pulsing and throbbing over my mouth. My God Bellayes I moaned into her. Her body shook over me. I thrust two fingers deep into her, pumping inside her as her walls clamped down around me. She begged me for more, cried out my name, and pleaded with me never to stop. I never wanted any sensation but her body on my lips, forever. Never, Bella I moaned against her over and over. My fingers pushed into her, a third finger spreading her open, filling her and drawing more of her wetness onto my lips. Her back arched and she reached behind her and grabbed my cock roughly, deliciously gripping me, pulling me with her hand. A second later she slumped backwards, falling off of me and to the side. Her breath was short and shallow, her pulse was racing. Terror struck me: for a split second I thought that my venom had gotten to her heart. I soon realized that her heart was racing because she was hyperventilating. I put my mouth over hers and pushed her own oxygen-depleted air back into her chest. I pulled back as her breathing began to slow, watching her, calling her name. Her eyes fluttered open. What happened? she asked thickly. Her face softened as she recollected and she began laughing, a beautiful full laugh that sent waves of joy along my skin. You scared the hell out of me when you collapsed backwards against me. But then I just realized you had hyperventilated. I touched her face, my smile uncontrollable. I felt like bursting into song. Im that good. The image of her moving over me and passing out was forever burned into my eyes. Youre so telling Emmett about this, arent you? she asked, covering her face. I fell back against the pillow next to her, laughing at the moment. There was no way I was sharing this moment with anyone but Bella. Not a chance. The vision of you over me my breath caught in my throat as my body yearned for her, is for me alone to remember every second of every day. A rush of moisture flooded between Bellas legs, making me groan softly. I knew now how she really tasted, how she really felt. Her arousal would forever more wreck me. We are going to need to work on getting my breathing under control, she whispered huskily. That, I may need you to do for days. She climbed on top of me and took me in her hands. The thought of doing that to Bella every day of eternity sent my mind racing, needing her more than I could communicate. I will be begging you. Bella, I cant find words to describe what you feel like against my lips. Her eyes searched mine, afraid, excited, aroused. Tell me that doesnt go away. Im never becoming a vampire if that goes away. I chuckled, knowing the answer. *****

Chapter 10: A Necessary Release I lay on my stomach on the soft rug in the living room, feeling damp and salty from our late morning swim. A warm breeze was coming in the large windows and the long white curtains billowed deep into the room. Edward sat on the large white chair, reading a medical journal. Edward darling, I drawled, kicking my feet behind me. Yes, my sunshine? he asked quietly, not looking up from his reading. Do you know what I think you might hear tonight in bed? I spoke in a soft purr. His head snapped up, his amber eyes flickering with lust, his article forgotten. Please, share. His voice was a low growl. I glanced at my book and read, I am here to do your bidding, Master. I am your slave. My voice infused the words with sex and I pushed my hips off the floor. I licked my lips and wagged my eyebrows. Edward groaned, laughing, and turned his attention back to his book. You are not saying that, Bella. Why not? I protested, giggling. Its not sexy, Bella. I dont know how people read Dracula and think of sex. I know that is the intent, but its justcreepy. He chuckled, looking at me out of the corner of his eyes before turning his gaze to his reading. Okay, but youre my sexy vampire, I blew him a kiss. If you like, we could switch it up and you could be my slave. Edward kept his eyes on his book but his mouth twitched into a smile. He recited, I shall cut off her head and fill her mouth with garlic, and I shall drive a stake through her body. Case in point. Not hot, Bella. Not sexy. Only creepy. He cocked his eyebrow but his gaze remaining on the pages of his journal. I giggled. Darling, is it the waste of a perfectly good head of garlic, or the waste of a perfectly good severed head that bothers you about that line? He looked at me for a long moment, his eyes smoldering at my playful tone, and a smile playing on his lips. In a blur, he leapt at me from the chair, landing silently behind me and lying flat against my back, his front along my back. He pinned me to the floor. Youre absolutely adorable, he whispered in my ear. Edward, what is it about seeing me on this rug that sets you off? I gasped as one hand ran up between my legs. He moaned as his fingers made contact with the flesh under my bikini. His other hand caressed the side of my breast. We had managed a relatively chaste morning and hadnt made

love in almost 12 hours. I laughed, and then blushed, at the thought of eternity like this. I think its the sight of you, anywhere He pressed against me and then pulled my bikini down, immediately yanking his boxers around his knees. His arms slipped under my hips, raising them off the floor slightly. I pushed myself up onto my forearms, and raised my bottom into the air in front of him, making him kneel behind me. God, Bella, youre gorgeous His hand stroked my hip while the other pushed two fingers gently inside me, seeing if I was ready for him. He moved his hand and positioned his cock at my entrance, pushing slowly into me. He held my hips steady against his movements and with his other hand reached around to rub my clit. He began to thrust into me, and with my body secured against his, he was deep inside me; the beautiful pleasure flirted on the edge of pain. We made love like this for a long time, our moans and cries filling the room. It felt like neither of us wanted to let go and come, but when I felt his legs shaking and heard him begin to whisper to me that he was coming, I threw my hair back and begged him to come hard, call my name, feel me. When he climaxed, he knocked my body flat onto my stomach, and pushed my legs as he continued pumping into me, grunting softly in rhythm with his hips. God, Bella he whispered. In a flash he flipped me gently onto my back and pulled my legs around his neck burying his face in me, inhaling the scent of me, the scent of him inside me. He drew his tongue in a long movement along my soft flesh and then replaced his mouth with his hand, stroking me with his fingers and his breath cool on my skin. The sensation of his tongue on me followed by his fingers brought me to immediate climax. He had figured out how to taste me without my losing consciousness. Edward leaned in and pushed his tongue into me, fast and hard a few times, replacing it with urgent fingers seconds later, moaning against my thighs. My fingers wrapped in his hair and I writhed under his hands as my orgasm continued, pulsing, but not fevered. He murmured against my thighs, kissing and licking my skin next to his face while his fingers caressed me. I realized how well he knew my body since the first night, it was almost as though he could read my mind while we were making love. Suddenly my climax turned harder, heavier with the feeling of his venom spreading along my thighs. Edwards fingers slowed in me when my breathing became too fast. Easy, love, he whispered. He raised his body over mine, kissing my mouth, and slowly stroking me with his fingers, bringing me down gradually. I could taste myself on his lips, and the sensation of his hands on me combined with the vision of him between my legs drove me wild. I devoured his lips, tangling my hands roughly in his hair. Bella he murmured against me, almost a question. Oh God Edward, I can taste myself on youEdwardI cant get enough of you I hiccupped against him, trying to steady myself with a deep breath. He kissed my jaw softly, whispering soothingly in my ear, Forever, Bella, we have forever. *****

EPOV Bella drifted off to sleep in my arms and I gazed at her face, at her lips moving slightly in her slumber. I was thinking about Alices email from last night when I heard Bella murmur, Please Edward. Dont leave me again. She whimpered once more in her sleep and then fell silent. Her nightmares had largely ceased, but occasionally she would whimper or cry something similar to this in her sleep. My cold heart felt like it was breaking as I pulled her closer to me. A line from her ridiculous book crept into my head, causing me to wince in agony. All over, all over. He has deserted me. Bella never wanted to talk about our separation, about when I abandoned her. We had talked around it, alluded to it, hinted at it never really discussed it. I knew that she was bewildered by what happened, and in some ways I was too. I knew that at the time it had been easier for her to believe that I didnt love her, than to know that I love her beyond reasonand still left her. If anything undermines trust, it is the realization that loving her didnt keep me with her. Bella would never have left. That trust wasnt immediately reinstated with a wedding ring, making love, or cooking breakfast. I knew she continued to have feelings about it. I felt helpless, knowing she needed release. I wish she would give herself the opportunity to get it off her chest, and give me the opportunity to own how I had failed her. ***** BPOV I must have fallen asleep. I awoke and it was dusk. Our bodies were entwined and Edwards hand drew lazy circles along my back. He was quiet when I stirred, his body was completely still. Ahhh, what a glorious nap. I stretched in his arms. He remained frozen in place. I waited for his words. I knew something was on his mind. Bella, why did you cry on the beach after we made love the other night? His voice was pained. He seemed to know the answer, but I wasnt sure I did. I looked up at him and tried to communicate with my expression the love I felt for him. Because I was overwhelmed. I am so in love with you, I cant contain it. I dont want to live without you. I dont want to lose this. Why would you lose this? he whispered, tracing the lines in my forehead with his finger. I shook my head. I didnt know. He looked at my face, his eyes communicating some private heartbreak. I love you Bella. With everything I have, I love you. I love you, too. I whispered, wishing I could read his mind.

Edward leaned back on the rug and watched me quietly. After several minutes of not knowing what to say, I picked up my book and began pretending to read. Edward slowly stood up and walked to the white chair, picking up his journal. The silence was deafening. ***** I took a bath, thinking about Edwards expression earlier. I realized I must had said something in my sleep and wracked my mind to remember a dream, any trace of it. I failed. I walked into the kitchen, wrapped in a robe. He was making me a smoothie. He looked up when I walked in and he smiled at me, relief washing over his face. I put my arms around his waist and buried my face in his chest, needing reconnection. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. I looked up into his eyes. Hi, he said softly, touching his forehead to mine. Hi, I said, squeezing him to me. Are you ok, Edward? I asked him, anxious. I am better than ok, Bella, he said quietly, smiling at me. He leaned down to kiss me and I parted my lips to urge his tongue inside. He swept it over mine, moaning softly. He pulled back reluctantly and handed me my smoothie. Thanks. I kissed him one more time and sat down at the table. He leaned against the counter, watching me. He was so beautiful, his marble body almost vulnerable in front of me in his boxers. His eyes were still trying to read my face. I didnt know what was going on in his head. The tension of the moment was too much for me, I needed the intensity to ease. Want to play a rousing game of checkers? I grinned. His smile was warm and lit up his amber eyes. Youre on. Youre going down, Cullen, I taunted. Edward cocked an eyebrow at me at the double meaning. Are you sure youre up for that, Blackout Queen? I slugged his arm, grabbing my hand afterwards, grimacing. He shook his head, laughing. I scowled at him. Just keep your sticky fingers to yourself, thief. He laughed and pulled me into a fierce hug. Never, he whispered, meaning so much more. ***** Edward beat me handily at checkers and then went on a quick hunt while I got ready for bed. He promised to return before I fell asleep. I didnt want to sleep, I wasnt tired. I wanted to pull Edward out of whatever dark mood had claimed him.

I walked over to the suitcase, and pulled out a soft satin bag. I pulled out the beautiful black lace garments, the matching bra, underwear, garter belt, and stockings. I pulled out the box with the beautiful stilettos. I took a deep breath, and dressed for Edward. I stumbled upon some long black satin sashes at the bottom of the bag and pulled them out, as a plan formed in my head. Edward returned a little while later. I heard him walk into the bedroom, and called out to him from the bathroom. Edward? Yes? Could you take your clothes off and climb into bed? Of course, he mumbled, game. I heard him dropping his clothes quickly and the sound of blankets being smoothed out on the bed. I turned out the bathroom light and walked into the dark room. Edward gasped when he saw me and moaned. Oh God Bella. Youlook amazing. He exhaled heavily, beginning to stand. Stay there, love. I walked over to him, amazed at how the lingerie made me feel: my legs felt surprisingly long and graceful in the heels. He watched every move I made. I pulled the sashes between my hands, smiling at him. What do you have there, my sweet wife? he growled playfully at me with lust in his eyes. He slid down on the bed, stretching long and lean across the mattress. I have something that you are going to pretend is tying you securely to the bed, I laughed. He looked at the sashes and said quietly, his voice full of the love I saw in his eyes. It would be like tying you up with string cheese, Bella. I climbed over him, straddling his waist. I know. I will be a delicious exercise in restraint. I winked at him and he moaned as his hands slid up my thighs to to my hips. No, no, no. I lifted his arms and pushed them over his head, tying them together and pulling the sashes as tight as I could. Edward chuckled at my efforts, but his face becoming serious when I gave him a stern look. Edward, pretend. Pretend you cannot touch me. You are not allowed to touch me. The sashes are just here to remind you. I let my tongue run across my lips. He nodded, mesmerized as his eyes moved over my body. I felt his cock twitch behind me when his gaze fell upon the garter belt. I climbed down his body and stood over his legs, turning my back to him. I spread my legs, bending at my waist, giving him quite a view as I tied each foot to a bedpost so that he was lying spread-eagle on the bed. His arms were tied together over his head. I ran my hands up my sides, feeling my body, twisting my nipples underneath the lingerie. I slid my fingers underneath the panties and stroked myself while he watched. Do you like this? He nodded and a vague noise of affirmation slipped from his lips.

I slipped off the heels slowly, peeling the stockings down, removing the garter belt. His breath was hard as he watched my small striptease. I straddled his waist, and felt his erection pushing up against my ass. I leaned down and kissed his lips softly and he whimpered against my lips as he trembled, clearly aching to push free and touch me. I licked his lips, and dragged my tongue down his jaw and neck to his collarbone where I sucked at his skin and bit him lightly. He moaned and writhed under my touch. I moved lower, sucking, licking biting and teasing his nipples as my fingers rubbed his sides with soft caresses. I rolled my hips over him, rubbing my wet panties on his stomach. Bella he moaned, I need to touch you, please. No, I whispered, shaking my head. Tonight is mine. I moved farther back and dragged my tongue over his navel, sucking his skin, grazing my teeth on his flesh, and feeling the muscles twitching underneath my lips. His hips arched to meet my mouth and he moaned my name as my fingers grazed his chest above my head. I crawled down and ran my tongue up his thigh, nibbling his skin for a long moment, placing small licks all along the sensitive skin at the top of his inner thigh. He cried out, pushing his legs apart and thrusting his hips to me. I moved higher, licking his scrotum with soft sweeps of my tongue, rubbing my hands on his inner thighs, moaning his name. Finally, I pressed a kiss to the head of his cock. He moaned in frustration, pushing his body to my mouth. I parted my lips and slipped my mouth over him and began sucking him, pulling my mouth up and down over him, stroking him hard with my hands, and bringing him to the edge of climax. Then I stopped. I moaned against him as I released his tip from between my lips. He looked up at me in agony. Bellaoh God youre killing me. His legs were shaking under me. I lowered my panties, tossing them so they landed on Edwards chest. He gasped my name, bending his head to try to reach my panties with his teeth. I straddled his thigh and unhooked my bra, letting my breasts fall from the support, and cupping them with my hands. I watched his mouth open as he tried to form a word and his eyes burned into my skin. I began moving over his leg, my pussy sliding over his skin. Oh, God, Oh he moaned, watching me. What do you want to do to me? I asked softly. I want to touch you, darling. he whimpered. I smiled and ran my hands up my torso to my breasts. Like this? He groaned, nodding as his leg writhed under me. Stay still, my love, I whispered, rocking on him, finding my rhythm as my heart beat picked up and

my breath caught in my throat. Bella, oh my God, Bella his eyes were clouded with lust and his mouth hung open. In my mind his body was trapped beneath me, mine. He was breathing deeply, taking in my scent, and his erection strained in front of me. He was so beautiful as he watched me, adoring me, needing me. My heart felt like it was crashing in my chest. ***** EPOV Bella rocked over me, sliding against my leg so easily; she was so wet for me. I was in agony. The sashes were nothing as far as restraints go, but I knew I couldnt touch her; she needed to control the moment. I was her slave. She had brought me to the brink of climax, and then pulled away. She was now rubbing her amazing body against my thigh. I could tell from her heartbeat and her scent that she was close. Do you love me, Edward? she moaned, moving faster over my thigh. Her movements were becoming less controlled, faster. Beyond comprehension I whispered watching her beautiful face, hearing a subtle change in her heartbeat. Say the words, she said quietly, forcefully. Her voice broke on the last word. I love you, Bella. So much it hurts. My voice was hoarse and my body was desperate for her. Do you need me? she asked and her tone had changed now too. She sounded small and vulnerable. Tell me you need me. She rolled her hips on top of me and her heartbeat was racing but heavy. Her hands cupped her breasts as she stared into my eyes. Her eyes begged me. I hesitated, realization dawning. My voice was soft. I need you, Bella. I need you, oh God I cant live without you. I gasped the words. Please forgive me. I begged, too quietly for her to hear. She closed her eyes and pushed harder against me. And then I saw two tears slide down her cheeks. Promise me you wont leave me again, she choked, her body slowing over my leg, say it. I let out a dry sob. I will never leave you, Bella. I will never leave you. She collapsed against me, her orgasm forgotten, her tears flowing in earnest now. I sat up, quickly tossing the sashes to the side of the bed and wrapping my arms around her small frame, suddenly so much less powerful than moments before. Im so sorry, Bella, oh my God, Im so sorry, I moaned against her, kissing her skin desperately. She hiccupped against my shoulder. Sometimes everything between us is just so intense; I dont

know what got into me. I do, Bella, I kissed her neck, her shoulder, her hair. Bella, Im so sorry. Im fine, really, Im fine. She inhaled deeply and looked at me. She took another deep breath and smiled weakly. I guess it just still really hurts sometimes. And the more you love me, the more scared I am that youll leave. My face broke at this admission, her admission that she still hurt, her admission that shes still afraid. Relief flooded me, heartbreak flooded me, guilt flooded me; I dropped my head against her shoulder. I cant live without you. I wish every second I could go back and have made a different decision. She pulled her face to mine, kissing me softly. I forgive you, I really do. *****

Chapter 11: Barriers Down We didnt talk much more after my meltdown, although Edward urged me to talk until I was done. Perhaps due to Charlies genes expressed in me, I didnt know what else to say about it. Edward was feeling raw, I was feeling raw. I just wanted to hold him. It felt so good to hold each other with the pain we both felt out in the open; the last barrier was at least discovered, if not banished. I fell asleep after awhile, after we clung to each other desperately, after we had listened to the sounds of each other breathing for long uninterrupted moments, after we had spent long stretches of time in our own thoughts trying to make sense of everything we had been through together. At one point he had turned to me and kissed me, pouring his entire soul yes, his soul into the kiss, his eyes never closing, of course, his hands holding my face gently. He had never kissed me like that, in all of our thousands of kisses. Nothing even close. I knew if he could cry he would have completely broken down tonight. It broke my heart that once upon a time he had, left me, lied to me, told me he didnt love me. Worse, that he did love me and still left. I knew the weight that my sadness had put on him, but he asked me to believe that he could handle it, that it wasnt for me to shoulder alone. ***** I woke up and it was still dark. Edwards arms were not around me, his breath was not against my neck, and his body was not curled against mine. I sat up in bed immediately; his absence was acutely painful. Im here, he said anxiously, appearing immediately in the doorway. Im sorry I left. My eyes were trying to adjust to the darkness; silence boomed around us. The bed, I mean. Just nowwhen I leftthe bed. I had never heard Edward sound awkward before and we both started laughing at his words, the sounds echoing off the walls in the dark room. He curled up next to me, wrapped his arms around my shoulders, and kissed me softly. Why are you awake? Your body is so exhausted. His voice was

husky in my ear and his hands were soft against my back. I dont know. Weird dreams. My nap was so long yesterday. I curled into him. I feel wrung out, but I cant sleep, I sighed. He kissed me slowly, whispering against my lips, Are you hurting, Bella? I wrapped my arms around him, urging him to get on top of me. No, I answered honestly. I just want you near me. I spread my legs for him and he climbed on me, hesitating, his eyes trained on mine. I could tell we were both out of words but still feeling the pull we always felt to be intimate. His muscles buzzed underneath his skin and his breathing was deep and slow the way it was when he needed me. I needed to feel him inside me, too. I reached down and put my hand around him, rubbing him against me slowly before guiding him inside. The sound we each made when we came together combined into a sound of relief. An exhale, and a sigh. He moved in me without any particular goal in mind, we werent working towards anything, we were simply coming together. His hand moved along my thigh as he held my leg around his waist and his lips grazed my neck as he whispered, I love you, Oh God Bella, I love you. ***** Bright morning light came in through the open doors. Edward was spooned behind me; his arms were cool against my warm skin. He leaned to kiss my shoulder and I rolled over to wrap my arms around his neck. Good morning, I mumbled, thick with sleep. Good morning, love. His hands rubbed my back softly. It took me awhile to wake up, but I eventually sat up, stretched, and noticed the laptop at the end of the bed. A laptop? I didnt even know there was a computer here. I looked at it again,, still not sure I was seeing it right. I had felt so disconnected from the world; something like a computer seemed completely out of place in this room, on this bed. He chuckled. Bella, we havent even been in all of the bedrooms. We have lived in the kitchen, this bedroom, and living room. I looked at him, confused. Is there even network access here? He smiled. Its maddeningly slow, but yes. Carlisle needs it for work when hes here. He kissed me long and slow, moaning softly against my lips. Bella He hummed against my lips for a moment before pulling back, remembering the point of the conversation. So, Alice emailed me the other day. Theyre in Peru. They wanted to know our plans. I had another trip planned but wanted to loop you into the decision. They want to know if we want to join them in Rio.

I thought it over. I wasnt ready to leave yet, but I had to admit the idea of a visit with the family sounded fun. Cant they come here? There are two other bedrooms here and you said theres another cabin, right? I want to stay a while longer. Tell them to come visit for a couple of days. His bright smile was beautiful. Excellent. Ill let them know to come join us here. He pulled the laptop onto his legs and his fingers were a blur of movement as he typed a quick reply to Alice before closing the computer and returning to me. Shower? he asked with a smile playing on his lips. ***** Edward climbed in the shower while I brushed my teeth. I climbed in and the water was scalding hot. Sorry, he mumbled, quickly turning down the heat. I forgot. He pulled me into his arms, our bodies wet and slick against each other. I was ravenous for him. I wasnt sure if it was the events of last night or knowing that the rest of the family was coming, but I wanted Edward nearly constantly. He groaned, This steamy shower is positively drenched with your scent, Bella. His lips moved down my neck as his hands grabbed my breasts roughly. He pressed his hips against my stomach, pushing his erection into me. As we kissed deeply, I never pulled away. His venom didnt ever reach a point of sensation overload with the water and steam on our faces. I relished our long, drawn out kisses, and that I never had to pull back to lick my lips, or shivered when the feel of his venom on my skin made me too sensitive. Bella? he asked. Does it not tingle? His eyebrow was cocked, and I could see his mind working. It does, it just washes off I guess. I shrugged, pulling his head back to mine. He resisted. In an instant, he had positioned all four of the nozzles so they were blasting directly at my torso and was on his knees, my thighs over his shoulders, my back pressed against the cold stone walls of the shower. He looked up at me, smiling beautifully. Brilliant, he murmured, looking down at my body in front of him and letting out a deep moan. He leaned forward and pushed his tongue against me, moving small circles around my clit, his fingers gripping the flesh around my spread hips on his shoulders, holding my body easily. I gasped at the feeling, at the movement of his soft wet tongue against my sex. The sensation from the venom was mild as water drenched Edwards head, pounding down over my body. I could feel each movement of his tongue, each swirl, each flick, each time he lapped at me hungrily. He kissed me, sucked me into his mouth and made small vibrations that rocked through me when he moaned. I pushed my hips against his face. Yes, oh God yes I whispered. Although the sensation was exponentially less intense with the water washing the venom away, the moment was far more sensual. The sensation before had been mind-mindblowing, but this was

different; I wasnt so distracted that I couldnt focus on him. Here I was able to look down at him as he moved on me, notice the moans he let out almost constantly, and feel our flesh together rather than an overload of a full-body orgasm with no ability to localize specific movements. He looked up at me, catching my gaze for long moments, before training his eyes on my breasts, my hips, my pussy. Edward, oh God, it feels so goodbaby I can feel your tongue on me I ran my hands into his hair and whispered, Edward do you like to taste me? He grunted loudly as I rocked my hips on his shoulders, pressing my body hard against his face, and holding his head to me. I felt myself careening towards climax and grabbed my breast involuntarily, causing Edward to convulse below me, crying out against my skin. My climax hit me warm and hard as his mouth moved in perfect synchrony with the pulsing of my body. He slowed his movements and I wiggled my hips against his face. He pressed a few soft kisses to my clit and whispered something I couldnt hear. Your turn, I murmured, lightheaded. He directed the water down to his legs and lifted me up around his waist, pushing into me fast, groaning. He thrust in me, pinning me against the wall. I could feel how hard he was inside me, could feel what tasting me for so long had done to him. He supported my weight with one arm while his other hand grabbed my breast, squeezing the flesh in his hand. His lips crushed mine; my taste was all over his mouth. He came quickly and hard, his cries were almost wild. After he stilled, he held me close to him, burying his face in my neck and breathing deeply. ***** I wrapped myself in a towel and began rubbing lotion into my skin, feeling water-logged and puckered from the long shower. Edward watched me lazily from the bed, his arms behind his head, his perfect body naked and stretched out on the soft sheets. When are they going to get here? I asked, drying my hair with a plush towel. No clue. He shrugged. Im sure no one is in a hurry to interrupt our honeymoon more than Alice. I think she really misses us. What does that mean? Tonight, tomorrow, next week? I wanted to know how much time I had to ravish him before sharing. Im guessing tomorrow night, he said, clearly not really knowing and, basking for the moment in our post-coital bliss, not really caring. I pulled out a silk babydoll nightgown and some matching panties, inspecting them. Edward cocked an eyebrow at me. If you put that on it wont stay on for long. I laughed and said Im sore and I look like a raisin. I need at least 15 minutes to recover. Edward watched me tuck the babydoll into the suitcase and said, Probably a good plan. I pulled out a soft cotton cami and matching boyshorts instead. He groaned, Jesus, is that considered un-sexy? For crying out loud, Alice. Why couldnt she just get you a pair of regular pajamas? He

threw an arm over his face and I let my gaze wander down his body to where he was thick and hard for me again. Because its our honeymoon and she loves us. And she loves clothes. I climbed over him and lowered my mouth over his cock, cupping his scrotum and moaning around his length. His fingers wound into my hair as he whispered my name. ***** We sat at the kitchen table for awhile, telling our favorite bad jokes. Edward had about five times as many as I did, owing primarily to his long lifespan, but also his amazing memory. I very rarely remembered the punch line of any joke I heard. I stood up and gathered the ingredients for my dinner and began cooking. The scent of garlic cooking in olive oil wafted to my nose and I moaned as my stomach growled. Edward shook his head, smiling at me. You wont miss it, but enjoy it while you can. Really? Cooking garlic doesnt even smell a little good to you? I asked, amazed. No, honestly. But its not bad, not like milk. He made a face. Milk just grosses me out. I laughed as I thought about that. I guess I can kind of see that. Milk can be gross. He nodded. But garlic just isnt appetizing. Itd probably be like you smelling grass. Or fabric. Maybe even raw meat. Not unpleasant, but not something you want to take a bite out of. The idea of a red bloody steak made my stomach heave and Edward was next to me in an instant. Oops, sorry. I turned back to my cooking, laughing. What smells gross you out the most? I asked. Lets see He tapped his chin adorably. Milk is pretty close to the top, although cheese isnt so bad, which I never understood. Mushrooms are kind of gross, but I never liked them even when I was human Youre playing it pretty safe here, sticking with the food category. Really, what smells gross? Well, if we arent limited to just food he had a look of revulsion on his face. Dog breath. I laughed, suspecting he was talking about Jacob. OK, my husband. I meant other people, like Jessica, I winked at him, or things, like plastic. Settle down. He chuckled, moving behind me and rocking his hips against me. It was delicious. I will not settle down. Im not done ravishing you yet. Immediately after he spoke the words his body stiffened, and he groaned. I looked over my shoulder at him and he was laughing. He leaned down to kiss me and said, The quiet has been so nice.

What? I asked. Before he had a chance to answer my question, I heard Emmetts loud voice boom from outside the front door, Get decent, lovebirds! The party is HERE! *****

Chapter 12: Arrival I gasped at the sound of Emmetts voice, and looked down at my body still in the skimpy tank and matching panties. Edward! I hissed, imagining Emmett busting the door off the hinges. Edward laughed and was gone from the kitchen in a flash, returning with a soft royal blue tank top and white shorts for me to put on. I had no idea how he had found something decent so quickly in that bag. He stood, watching me get dressed with a smile playing on his lips. He was dressed minimally as well; his muscular chest was bare and his only clothing was the pair of blue board shorts, slung low on his hips. I stared at the trail of soft hair leading from his belly button down below his shorts. My heart raced at the sight of him; suddenly his appearance struck me as far too sexy for family time. I realized we would hereafter always need to figure out this balance. He smiled at me, almost as if reading my thoughts, and said, I know, baby. I want you too. Always. He kissed me long and slow, his fingers stroking my backside before pulling back with effort, laughing. But, here we goget ready for our life now. Immediately thereafter, Emmett I assumed, of course, that it had to be Emmett pounded on the front door as a second warning. Edward said in a normal speaking voice, Come in everyone. Were in the kitchen. I looked up and saw a blur of movement that stilled into Alice standing in front of me, bouncing and clapping her hands. You guys are having so much fun! I looked at Edward and we both laughed at her statement. It hadnt been a question. We have, I agreed, smiling and hugging her. The rest of the family filed into the kitchen, grinning and giving me hugs before turning their eyes to Edward. A silence swept over the room. Edward leaned against the counter with the heel of each of his hands resting on the edge of the counter on either side of his waist, one leg crossed over the other casually. His hair was, if possible, messier than usual. His eyes gleamed and a smiled played on his lips as he listened to his family react to the scene around them. Alice gaped at him. I had to see it with my own eyes to believe it. I told you, Rose, didnt I tell you? She turned to Rosalie, pointing at Edward. Rosalie let out a dry laugh. Who would have guessed getting laid would have such an impact on Edward? Certainly not me. Her voice was dripping with sarcasm, but her eyes were soft and held a

warm smile. Emmett laughed next to her, nodding. Esme defended Edward quietly, staring at him lovingly. I think its more than that, Rosalie. It is, Jasper breathed. Itsunbelievable. I looked around at my new family, trying to see him through their eyes and not the eyes that had spent virtually every moment watching him, absorbing his light, his adoration, his desire. Edward chuckled and reached for me, pulling me back against his front and wrapping his arms across my chest so that we were both facing his family. Carlisle, do you need to get in on this action? Carlisle laughed softly, shaking his head. Im good. Just happy to see you two. Carlisles smile was warm and his eyes twinkled at us. No one moved, everyone stood frozen, smiling in disbelief. I suddenly realized how calm Edward was, how much more of him shone through without his layer of self-imposed angst. He had been like that ever since our first morning here; I suppose I had stopped noticing it. With the exception of a few difficult moments, his eyes were always relaxed now, crinkling with an almost constant smile. His brooding was no longer dark, but instead thoughtful; he seemed more quirky and observant than morose and tortured. His quiet demeanor hadnt disappeared, but the quality had changed. His thoughtful posture was confident, relaxed, sexy. Well done, Bella! Emmett laughed, breaking the silent tension and pulling me into a hug. I blushed hotly, pushing him away and trying to diffuse the moment by asking about their trip. Alice hopped around the kitchen, explaining how they had gone to see some old friends in Peru. And then I saw Edward smiling like this, she pointed a slim finger at him again, now wagging it happily, and I had to see it for myself. I swear Bella we wont crash your honeymoon indefinitely. She smiled winningly at me, and then added more quietly, I just really missed you guys. I knew it was going well andwell, I just am really happy to see you. I smiled at her and nodded, her words made my heart swell in love for my new sister. It is really good to see you guys. I looked at each of them. Esme pulled me into another hug and then looked up at Edward. So, what have you guys been up to? I blushed wildly as the entire rest of the family burst into peals of laughter. Esme chuckled next to me. Besides the obvious. Goodness. She looked at Carlisle for help, and he just shook his head again, laughing. I knew if she could have blushed she would have, too. Edward laughed softly, looking at the floor, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. I hadnt seen him do that in days, and realized it was a mannerism he displayed when he was trying to focus or filter. I couldnt imagine how much filtering he had to do with so many audible minds around him again. He looked at me to answer Esmes question, and we both shrugged, realizing most of it was so personal even the times we were clothed that we didnt really know how to answer the question.

Weve just beenbeing married, I said quietly and fidgeted for a moment. Its so beautiful, here. Thank you, Esme, Carlisle. Were really enjoying the island. I smiled at them, hoping the answer sufficed. I bet you are, Emmett winked at Edward and Edward groaned, most likely at the thoughts that rushed into Emmetts head. Okay, okay, Emmett, thats enough. Edward pushed himself off the counter, laughing openly now, and leading everyone into the living room. He turned his attention to Alice and asked, What kinds of activities do you have planned, little Alice? A warm smile lit up his eyes, knowing she would never arrive anywhere empty-handed. His eyes turned flat and he groaned at what he saw in her mind. Alice. No. Oh come on Edward, it will be so much fun, I promise! Alice pleaded. Its so cheesy, Alice, he sighed. I know! she said, giddy. Thats the point! Edward looked at me warily with an apology in his eyes, and then turned back to Alice, Is Bella going to have fun with this? He glared at her intensely; his protectiveness was adorable. She is! And youre going to die of the sexiness overload. Its still your honeymoon after all. She was talking so fast I almost didnt understand her. Without more input from Edward, she jumped through the front door, running into the darkness. Edward, what is going on? Where is she going? I laughed, forgetting how quickly I fell behind when the two of them were together. Youll see soon enough, his voice was resigned, but his eyes were happy. He took my shoulders in his hands and looked at me earnestly. Just know, Bella that you dont have to do any of this. He leaned in to whisper sexily in my ear, And know, too, how thoroughly I will ravage you later for whatever teasing you inflict upon me tonight. I gasped, moaning slightly against him. Everyone around us smiled and pretended to be inspecting something nearby, obviously hearing the exchange but pretending they didnt. Everyone except Emmett who hooted, Thats hot! Esme elbowed him, hard. Emmett whimpered, grabbing his side. Edward winked at me and kissed me softly. And so it begins, he chuckled against my ear. ***** Karaoke? I almost shrieked. No. No way. Alice laughed at me and then turned serious. Okay, Ill play along. She fixed an innocent, pleading expression on her face. Please Bella?

I rolled my eyes. No, Alice, no way. There is not a chance in hell that I am singing karaoke! I looked at her in disbelief. Did she not know me at all? I liked attention less than did chameleons. She laughed. Please? Why are you laughing? I asked, agitated. Because I know you are going to say yes. She smiled smugly. So just give into it and enjoy it. She lowered her voice and turned her back to her family, none of whom except Edward were paying any attention to us anyway. Are you telling me you dont like putting on any shows, ever? She winked at me. I gasped, Alice! I felt like my cheeks were melting. Edward chuckled quietly behind me. She giggled, a tinkling beautiful sound. I didnt steal too many peeks, but Bella, you cant fool me you little vixen. You made me proud. She made a kitty-claw gesture at me and smiled wide as I gaped in horror at her. She stood up straighter and nodded, resolute. Youre going to rock this! Besides, Rosalie sings. We just need to add some spice. Come on! Guys versus girls! She grabbed my hand, bouncing next to me. I looked to Edward to help me but he just held his hands in front of his chest and shook his head, smiling. I rolled my eyes at her, a smile playing on my face. I honestly dont know how you ever say no to this woman, Jasper, I dont even try, he mumbled from the couch. I turned back to Alice. Where did you even have space in your luggage for a karaoke machine anyway? I asked, totally confused. Alice looked at me as though I was very slow. What do you mean, Bella? We brought the boat. She walked me to the window and pointed to the large vessel moored to the dock down the beach. I groaned. Of course they would have a gigantic yacht at their disposal. Where did you think we were staying when you went to bed? Here? Emmett cackled. No thanks, I can do without that acoustic torture. Edward watched me with a bemused expression on his face. I could tell he was enjoying watching me with his family. The way he looked at me, so loving and satisfied I wanted to kiss him, pull him into the bedroom and only come out hours later. Sensing my bodys response, he shot me a warning glance. I took a deep breath and turned to Alice and Rosalie, Okay, lets do this. Alice squealed, grabbed Rosalie, and pulled us both into the bedroom to decide what song Rosalie was going to sing. I laughed at her choice, but decided to be a good sport. This night was getting interesting, and I had to admit I was having fun. I couldnt wait to see what the guys chose. ***** Carlisle and Esme ducked out for a hunt, then to leave the kids to their fun. Apparently karaoke

wasnt their thing either. We flipped a coin and decided the guys would go first. They emerged from the room in shorts, all shirtless, each with one of my shirts tied over their heads like scarves. What the? Rosalie laughed. Alice and I stared at them with our mouths gaping open. They looked ridiculous. Emmett fidgeted with the karaoke machine, and Jasper and Edward clapped their hands over their heads as the opening guitar began, andoh GodI Believe in a Thing Called Love by the Darkness started playing on the machine. It was perfect for the activity Alice had inflicted on us all; it communicated their deliberate protest to the cheesiness of the moment. The over-the-top glam rock song was a hilarious, good-natured choice. Emmett sang, struggling to not burst into laughter. Cant explain all the feelings that youre making me feeeeeel. Jasper mimicked the drums. Edward played air guitar. I had never seen three bigger hams in my entire life. I had never seen Edward cut loose and be so self-deprecating. They all chimed in for the chorus, and despite the ridiculous song, all three of us were speechless, watching their bodies move. Although they were clearly making fun of the game, they were making the best of it. My heart burst watching them, their earnest love for us evident by their complete engagement in probably the last activity any of them, except perhaps Emmett, would have chosen. The song ended and we clapped and whistled wildly, giving our respective husbands big kisses. They laughed, collapsing on the couch, leaving the shirts on their heads. Okay girls, now we expect something really good, Emmett laughed. Alice dragged us into the bedroom, digging accurately into my luggage to give each of a bathing suit and pulling three towels from the closet. Alice how many bathing suits did you pack for me? Fourteen, she answered, without hesitation. I just started at her, shaking my head. We wrapped ourselves in the towels before Alice went over our moves one more time. I felt dizzy from how much I was dreading this, but Alice assured me that the song really required us to keep our backs to the guys the whole time. That helped my nerves. I wouldnt have to watch the guys looks of horror watching me dance otherwise. ***** EPOV The girls emerged from the bedroom wrapped in towels. Bella was blushing furiously, her hair in an adorable high ponytail. She looked positively delicious and I was on the verge of calling this off and dragging her into the bedroom but resisted, wanting to see what they had in store for us. I knew Bella was mortified, but I had seen this beautiful woman move, and knew she would completely blow me away. Rosalie hit the code on the machine and looked at the two other girls before hitting play. They both nodded. The opening music started and all three of us burst out laughing at the sounds of Destinys Child singing Bootylicious. All three girls leaned into the microphone singing, sultry, Emmett, can you handle this? Jasper, can

you handle this? Edward can you handle this? I dont think you can handle this! Whoo! At the last sound they all threw their towels off and turned their backs to us, shaking their hips, revealing three of the skimpiest bikinis I had ever seen. The sight wasindescribable, and I was struck, once again, knowing Bella would be exponentially more stunning once she had changed. The thought made me almost dizzy with desire. She was too much for me as she was. Rosalie began singing in a sultry voice that caused Emmett to bombard me with images I had to actively block. I shot him a look and to his credit, he did look sheepish. Sorry, he thought. But dude, look at them. Bella and Alice began grinding their hips with their backs to us, waving their arms in sexy movements next to their heads. Bella was tentative, but even as I watched her and I knew she felt my gaze burning into her back she began to relax visibly. Rosalie sang, I dont think youre ready for this jelly. I dont think youre ready for this jelly. I dont think youre ready for this, cause my bodys too bootylicious for you, babe At the end of each chorus the girls raised their hands up over their hands in a windmill motion and brought their hands down hard on their asses, making the most delicious smacking sounds, bending their backsides towards us and looking over their shoulders at us. We all groaned in unison. Bellas eyes burned into mine. I felt myself hardening in my shorts, wanting everyone out of the house immediately. Damn Edward, Emmett thought, the image of Bella grinding to the music in his head. Shes got some moves. I growled, but said quietly, You have no idea. I was mesmerized by the vision of Bella, her arms wrapped together over her head, as her hips swayed to the music, her body moving beautifully, sensually. I heard Alices voice in my head, I told you so. Now get us the hell out of here already. The song ended and I stood up, not caring if my pants needed adjustment, and not caring either how abruptly I ended an admittedly fun evening. Bella stared at me with her chest heaving. Okay, I said quietly. Time to say goodnight. Everyone else appeared more than happy to leave and get to exactly what we had in mind for ourselves. They were gone in seconds and we were alone. It was all I could do to not rip Bellas bikini from her body and take her over the couch. ***** BPOV Edwards eyes were almost black. I felt like his stare might melt the ridiculous bikini off of my skin. He appeared frozen in place and was noticeably hard underneath his board shorts, my shirt still tied adorably to his head. I walked over to him and pulled the shirt from his head, seeming to wake him from his stupor.

Bella, do you know what you do to me? His voice was quiet and the room felt immensely silent after his words fell away. Show me, I barely even whispered, my need for him overwhelming. I needed him so much, needed to feel his skin on mine, his lips on my breasts, his hands everywhere. I wondered if he could hear the pulse in my sex. He moved towards me slowly, running his hands up my torso, moving them around to my back before they slipped forward and palmed my breasts. I groaned and felt my nipples hardening as he pulled me closer. He untied my bikini top in back, letting it fall to the ground before he knelt and lowered the bottoms of my bathing suit, holding them so I could step out of them. I noticed that he put the bottoms in his pocket and smiled at him beneath the teeth that chewed my lower lip. He stood and his fingers traveled deliberately up my arms, but his eyes were trained on my lips, and his mouth was open, almost as if he tasted me in the air. His hands reached my shoulders and moved slowly down my sides to my hips, and around to my ass. He kneeled before me again, lowering his hands down the back of my legs and up around the sides, back up to my hips. He stayed on his knees and pulled me to him, pressing his face against my lower abdomen, and taking a deep breath against my skin. He didnt move from this position for a long moment, instead letting his hands gently stroke my hips as my fingers entwined in his hair. Even though we were both still, the tension between us wasnt diffusing or calming. It was ratcheting, growing past a point that felt patient and relaxed. My body felt like it was continually getting wetter, and my pulse was racing so fast I was certain it was distracting everyone on the boat. Edward looked up at me. You are so excited. So wet, Bella. Youre killing me. He hadnt even touched me there yet. I moaned, pulling on his shoulders, urging him up closer to me. He stood up in a flash, wrapping his arms around my waist and crushing his lips to mine. I fumbled with the tie on his board shorts and lowered them over his erection, my heartbeat skipping at the feeling of him released and slapping against my stomach. You were amazing tonight he murmured into my mouth, his hands grabbing my ass, pulling me against him, and rubbing his cock against my stomach. But do you have any idea what thoughts were going through my brothers heads? I pulled back, shocked. Oh Jesus, Edward. I think I just died a little bit. I could have gone my whole life He interrupted my rant with a hard kiss, pushing his tongue into my mouth, claiming me. Who were you dancing for out there? His voice was rough, and his hands were gentle but only barely. I hesitated; his agony was delicious. Alice, I said, teasing, my voice sultry. He groaned against me. Such a tease. His hand lightly spanked me as he watched my mouth. Harder, I dared him, feeling my breath coming hard and fast.

His hand came down hard on me, the smacking sound loud in an otherwise quiet room. I yelped slightly and Edward murmured, Sorry, against my lips. Dont be, I purred, grabbing his cock and squeezing. Show me how much you want me, he growled in my ear. I dragged his hand down between my legs, pushing his fingers between my lips. Slowly I began moving, rubbing myself on his hand. He groaned and continued to stare at my mouth. His fingers began moving over me in time with the rolling of my hips. I turned my back to him and leaned over the back of the couch. Im sorry I teased you tonight. I pushed my bottom towards him, looking at him over my shoulder in the way that made him crazy. He whispered my name, his tone almost desperate, and came up behind me. He rubbed himself against my entrance, then grabbed my hips with both hands and pushed into me. I cried out at how hard he was, my need for him overwhelming me. He pulled himself all way the way out, and I moaned, begging him to come into me again. He spanked me and I cried out. I can feel how much you want this. His voice was quiet with a soft undertone of love in the otherwise teasing words. I do I begged, backing up against him. He held my backside still, rubbing my lower back with his thumbs. He pushed into me again, and the sensation was almost too much for me. I gasped his name, pushing myself back against him, feeling him sharp and deep in me. He thrust into me twice and then pulled out again. What do you want me to do now? His voice was still soft. I hesitated, knowing what I wanted but unable to say the words as they came to my head. Just tell me, baby, he whispered. Tell me whats in your head right now. Spank me, Edward. I swallowed and felt my skin break out in goose bumps. Spank me and fuck me. Hard. I blushed at my own words, the truth of my desire bare between us. He groaned my name, pushing into me and doing as I asked; the spanking was beautifully sharp and arousing for me, but probably only a tiny tap for him. He began to thrust into me, gripping my hips roughly. I love how your hands are holding me in place, I moaned and his hips moved faster behind me, causing him to move deep in me. Faster, Edward I begged, wanting to see him break his self-imposed limit on his speed with me. Suddenly he pumped into me faster than Id ever felt before. It was an inhuman movement and his hips were a blur as I looked behind me. He was never going too hard or deep, but the sensation of him moving so fast was almost like a vibration throughout my whole body. He began moaning loudly, and his eyes were trained on my ass as his hands held me still. He had never moved so fast inside me and the feeling was unbelievable. The sound of his hips colliding with my skin was a blur of soft taps against my skin.

Bella, fuck, oh Godoh so tight, Bella, please. His voice made me wild, and I felt myself throbbing around him as I begged him to push harder. The vibrations of his movements spread along my clit, down my thighs, and to the back of my calves, making my legs feel weak and numb. He held me up at my hips, pushing into me unbelievably fast before almost bellowing my name and thrusting deep into me as he came. He slumped over me, leaning me farther into the couch. He stood up after a few moments, turning me to him and picking me up. Carrying me to the couch, he sat me down, kneeling on the floor in front of me. His hands ran over my breasts, and he reached up to suck a nipple into his mouth as he slipped two fingers in me and began circling my clit with his thumb. I leaned back against the couch, simply feeling his touch and taking in his expression of raw adoration. He brought me to the edge and back again over and over again, torturing me with his delicious fingers. Do you want me to let you come, sweet girl? he asked softly, watching my face Please, I whimpered, watching his arm move below me, watching the muscles move underneath his skin. But you look so beautiful right now. What if I wanted to watch you a little while longer? A smile played at his lips when I looked at him, pained. When I was crying out to him, not sure I could take it anymore, he lifted himself up on his knees and pushed into me, thrusting deep and rubbing his pubic bone against my clit, bringing me close to release. He whispered my name in my ear, urging me to let go. Come for me, my Bella. Come all around me. I love you so much, please come for me Light exploded behind my eyes and my cries echoed off the walls in the room. I knew for sure everyone heard me down on the beach. I could not have cared less. ***** I hardly slept. We moved our passion to the bed, Edward stopping briefly to put on some music. We lay, kissing and touching each other for hours, the reminder that we would not be able to touch constantly once we were integrated back into our normal life made me reluctant to give up one moment alone with Edward. His fingers stroked every inch of my skin, and our mouths tasted each other over and over. I didnt know what the next few days held for us, but I could sense the same need for connection emanating from Edward; his kisses were alternately feverish and gentle, frenzied and luxurious. We watched the sunrise, whispering to each other as we let our minds wander together. I finally dozed off, naked and spent in his arms. *****

Chapter 13: Spill It I let out a loud yawn and stretched as I reached for Edward. I looked up and saw him standing next to the bed with a plate of strawberries and mango. His skin was shimmering slightly in the sun coming in the French doors, and his shorts were riding low on his hips. He hadnt worn a shirt in

days life was blissful. Strawberries? I asked ravenously, sitting up quickly. Where did you find those? We had been on the island over a week. I was running pretty low on fresh produce. Esme brought enough groceries for a family of ten. You are officially re-stocked. He placed the plate at the edge of the bed and sat down next to it. He reached out and tousled my hair, glancing at my naked sheet-wrinkled skin. You are ridiculously cute right now. He leaned down to kiss me, letting his lips linger on mine. He pulled back and smiled at me. I could see profound happiness on his face and I realized he had everything he needed in life on this island. I grabbed some fruit and devoured it; I hadnt returned to my dinner last night after the family arrived. Did you go to the boat this morning? I awoke at one point from my morning slumber and Edward had been gone. I had gone back to sleep easily, figuring he was spending time with his family. He nodded, watching intently as my lips move over a strawberry. I sucked on it more erotically than I probably needed to. He moaned, and then croaked, Only for an hour or two. I spent most of the time with Carlisle. I was getting the third degree from everyone else, their thoughts were out of controlalthough not completely inaccurate. He smiled crookedly at me, touching my cheek with his hand. I imagine youll get something similar today if they can pry us apart. Carlisle didnt grill you, then? I would have thought Carlisle would want more details than anyone, being Edwards closest confidante. Not his style. But, he didnt need to. I told him pretty much everything. He shrugged, playing with a lock of my hair. I gulped down a piece of strawberry I probably should have chewed more thoroughly, almost coughing. Um, everything? I asked, feeling the blush wash over my cheeks. Edward smiled at me, Dont worry. Not everything everything. Just the things that Carlisle would want to know. Like? I waved my hand in a circle, urging him to be more specific. I needed to know exactly how mortified I should feel next time I saw my father-in-law. Well, I told him about the first night not specific details about our lovemaking, Bella, he assured me, seeing the horror on my face. Just the part about how it felt easier than Id expected. His finger traced my lip, his eyes losing focus as he thought back to our first night on the island. I described, as best as I could, how well I can sense what your body feels, how it reacts. How Ive memorized your heartbeats, how I can tell what you need. I stared at Edward. His words were incredibly romantic but the image of him saying these things to Carlisle made me queasy with embarrassment. You said those thingsto Carlisle? My voice was quiet. I was not angry, just surprised that he spoke about such intimate things with someone else. I had never had a confidante like that, before Edward.

I did, Bella. Does it bother you? I shook my head and shrugged in a single gesture. He smiled at me. Carlisle is my father, but more than anything he is my sounding board. His input is exceedingly important to me. He had been worried about our honeymoon, about how it would go when we were intimate. I wanted to reassure him that it was all much smoother than expected. He leaned down to kiss me, letting his tongue slide into my mouth as a low moan emanated from his throat. He sat up, quickly, adding, Oh, and I mentioned the venom. He was very interested in that. I rolled away from him and slammed my face into a pillow, groaning. Oh my God Edward, please tell me you didnt My voice was muffled and I punched the mattress next to my pillow. Edward laughed, rolling me over before climbing on top of me, pushing my legs apart with his thigh. didnt what? Tell him about your propensity for hyperventilation? he chuckled, looking at me softly. No. Of course not. I just mentioned that it causes a tingling sensation on your skin, not altogether unpleasant. From a scientific standpoint it really is fascinating. You can say that again, I mumbled, bringing my hand to my eyes, attempting to exhale the mortification I felt. He chuckled. And its not like we have a whole host of testimonials from humans who have had sex with vampires. So, theres an element ofa learning opportunity for us. His voice trailed off and I could tell that he was finally feeling somewhat sheepish. Please dont make this clinical. I know how you and Carlisle can be together. Youre going to totally geek out about this. But it is so much more than a scientific curiosity, Edward. I couldnt hide the small amount of hurt I felt that he was able to dissect something that was, clearly by contrast, so completely transcendent to me. He took my face in his hands and kissed me. Thats really all the clinical stuff we discussed. But Bella, you have to know, its far more personal to me than that. He looked at me, his eyes concerned. Mostly I just talked to him for awhile about what I feel, how youve changed me, how I feel whole. None of these things are things you havent already heard. Imagine how it is for him, to have loved me like his own son for so long and have seen me so lonely. This is huge for him, too. But trust me, that when it comes to my feelings, I will always tell you first, and you hear much, much more of what is in my heart. Of course you do. His smile turned from apologetic to lust-filled as his hands traveled down my neck to cup my breasts. I pulled his shorts down and he squirmed out of them, kicking them off the bed. What kinds of things do I hear from you, about us, that he wont? I asked softly as my hands curled into his hair. I arched my hips into his stomach as he kissed across my collarbones. Well he drawled, reaching up and pecking my lips, I wouldnt tell anyone else how your mouth feels against mine his tongue licked my lips softly. I wouldnt tell anyone else how soft your breasts feel in my hands, how beautiful your nipples are, how they are the exact color of peonies but smell like freesias. He kissed each nipple and inhaled deeply before letting his tongue swirl around the peaks. He moaned softly, God, Bella. I arched my back at his touch.

He continued, bringing his face to mine. I wouldnt tell anyone else how your entire chest flushes as you orgasm. I wouldnt tell anyone else how you taste, your flavor is a mixture of flowers and lust. His fingers snaked down between my legs, rubbing me softly for a moment before he lifted them between our lips. I would forever associate the smell and tasted of myself with the taste of his lips, his cock, his fingers. I wouldnt tell anyone else how the blood rushes to your skin under my touch, like a trail of pink fire. I wouldnt tell anyone else about your hungry kisses and bites against my shoulder when Im pleasuring you with my fingers. He licked my neck. You love my fingers, he whispered. Dont you? I nodded and he smiled softly. His voice turned hoarse and his erection pressed insistently against my thigh. I wouldnt tell anyone else how you love it when I say fuck and pussy, and spank you when you beg me to. And I know you love it precisely because I would only ever let you see that side of me. I sucked in air at these last words, my heart slamming into my throat as the truth of his words overwhelmed me. He continued, his breath and voice soft again against my neck. I wouldnt tell anyone else how your pussy feels around me right before you climax. Your muscles are on the delicious edge of release, quivering and squeezing me. Your whole body freezes in motion begging me not to change a single thing about my movements until you come. He looked into my eyes as he took one of my hands and slid it between us and around his cock. I wouldnt tell anyone else how you look when you feel how hard you make me. Its like you still cant believe it. He kissed me, slow and loving, staring at my eyes as my fingers moved along his length. I wouldnt tell anyone how hot your lips and tongue feel around me when youve taken me into your mouth, how you moan against me right before I come against your soft tongue He reached up and traced my lips. And I wouldnt tell anyone else how your eyes look into mine when you are begging me to push inside you, the way youre looking at me right now. At these last words I let out a soft moan and pulled my legs up around him as he slid inside me. ***** We showered together, taking much longer than we probably needed to. We both opted to dress simply in bathing suits, and headed out to the boat so Edward could give me a tour. It was a relatively new acquisition, apparently. Carlisle and Esme anticipated that we would be spending more time on the island, and wanted a comfortable boat for trips to and from Rio. I climbed aboard, looking around, my mouth gaping open. It was amazingly luxurious. Its huge, I gasped. Thats what she said. Emmetts voice came from behind me. I turned to see Edward laughing, giving Emmett a fist bump. I laughed, turning away from them. A large deck spanned out in front of me, covering the entire front of the boat. The controls appeared to be on the second floor, and a main cabin opened out onto the deck. I walked inside. Plush couches, a large-screen TV, a Wii, the karaoke machine, a huge

sound system, and some tables all filled the room, without making it feel crowded. It was gigantic. This is like something you see in Charlies Angelsor a rap video, I mused, looking around me. Emmett laughed behind me. Its in our game plan. Leave this island after a few days and pick up some bitches and hos. I heard his laughter behind me, and then heard him say Ow! I was just kidding Rosie. Rosalie came up to me and gave me a small, uncharacteristic hug. Good morning, Bella. She smiled. I smiled back at her, noticing her miniscule gold bikini. Her long legs seemed to start just below her chin. I felt a pang of self consciousness and looked at Edward. He was staring at my ass in the red boyshorts of my bikini. I laughed and went over to kiss him lightly. What was that for? he whispered. I just love you, I murmured against his lips. Okay, enough of that. What, cant you guys take a break for ten minutes and be sociable? Emmett scowled at us playfully. Edward laughed, his head falling back in amusement. Ten years, Emmett. Ten years I had to endure crumbling walls, broken doors, and nonstop moaning before you guys cut down to, what, at least twice a day? Never mind the three times time you broke my bed. Edward laughed, shaking his head. Now, you two get to keep completely silent whenever I need to kiss my wife. Emmett laughed, holding his hands up in surrender. Fair enough, bro. Rosalie smiled at us, her eyes twinkling. Jasper and Alice walked in, dripping wet. Alice looked adorable in a tiny black string bikini. Jasper wore red swim trunks, his torso surprisingly muscular. I realized I was staring and looked away quickly. I felt Edward chuckle behind me. Busted, he whispered in my ear, his tongue darting out against my earlobe. I felt my body flush at his touch. Jasper looked at both of us and rolled his eyes. You guys are killing me, he said in his soft drawl, a smile playing on his lips. But dont stop! Alice squealed at us. I am totally benefitting from what your mood is doing to my husband. Mee-owww! I blushed furiously and Edward groaned next to me. Were you guys swimming? I stammered awkwardly, unfortunately finding the question with the most obvious answer possible. Edward kissed my neck, laughing quietly at my lack of finesse. Emmett snickered, If you can call it that. Edward looked at Emmett then Jasper, his curiosity piqued. What is this about? Emmett smiled at Jasper, and then shrugged. I saw Jasper swimming and told him he reminded me of my second grade teacher teaching us how to dog paddle. He says he could beat me to Rio and back, but it would be a waste of his time kicking my ass so handily. I told him to put his money

where his mouth is. Edwardss eyes sparkled. Come on Jazz. Youve seen Emmett swim. Hes like a boulder with fins. Of course youd beat him, and itd be totally worth it. His laugh was low and happy. Emmett growled. Jasper laughed and shrugged. Im pretty sure Id beat both of you cleanly. Thats not the issue. I just dont know that I want to embarrass you in front of your ladies. Then I'd have to sit around feeling your angst all night. He cocked an eyebrow. The shit-talking had started in earnest. Edward laughed again. Well, now, I dont want to enter this bet and be accused of sand-bagging. You can take Emmett, but Im definitely out of your league, Jazz. Edwards voice was saccharine and patronizing. Like hell you are, you brooding little shit. Jasper grinned at Edward. Emmett chuckled. Thats awesome, Jazz. Okay okay, Rosalie stepped forward with her hands in the air. A swim to Rio and back. The winner gets to choose the punishments for the two losers. The punishments will be different for each loser, will not include anything having to do with anyone elses wife, and the guy coming in second place gets to choose from the two punishment options. I thought this over, watching Edward vibrating with the challenge. Rio was not especially close. The guys nodded, staring at each other. All three male bodies were buzzing with excitement. Edward pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it onto a couch. Lets do this. I looked over to Alice, who was smiling at me. She winked. I wasnt sure if that meant her guy would win, or mine would. And then the thought occurred to me. What were the punishments, and is that what she was winking about? ***** The boys dove into the water and disappeared. I tried to scan the water for Edward but he was gone in seconds. Alice tugged my arm and nodded to the deck where we sat down on three chaise lounges in the sun. Edward largely stays underwater. Emmett will use a pretty powerful stroke. Jasper kind of mixes the two. They love to swim. Rosalie smiled over at me from the chaise to my right. Alice was on my left, closing her eyes against the sun and clearly enjoying the heat. How long will they be gone? I asked. I had no idea how long it took three vampires to swim fifty miles each way. Not long. Maybe two hours, Alice murmured. They swam fifty miles per hour? The thought set my pulse racing. Alice cocked an eyebrow at me. Two hours? Rosalie exclaimed, ignoring me. What the hell? My mouth dropped open. This was considered slow for them?

Alice shrugged. They stop to wrestle in the water about five times. Emmett is being a pain in the ass. Rosalie laughed, Thats my boy. We sat silently for awhile. It was a beautiful day, breezy and warm; the sky was blue and cloudless. Alice turned to me suddenly, Oh! I have some gossip! She giggled. And I never have gossip so this is special. I smiled at her expectantly. Rosalie said, Oh is this the? Alice nodded. Yep, the Edward-is-married-so-Im-giving-up-on-life story. I looked at them both, bewildered. What are you talking about? Alice smiled wickedly. Jessica Stanley eloped. I gaped at her. Jessica eloped? In just the past week? Alice nodded at my expression. I know, right? But the worst part is the guy is Edwards total hideous-alternate universe doppelganger. Rosalie snorted, Yeah, in her dreams. What Alice means is we can totally see what she was going for. Consider, in this alternate universe, that Edward has bad skin, thin floppy hair, a drinking problem, and the strange habit of constantly smelling his fingers. Alice sighed. OK I know, he looks nothing like Edward. But you can tell what she was reaching for. The silent, brooding, floppy-haired type. Oh, hes awful though. Poor Jessica. Rosalie snorted at this last comment, clearly not so sympathetic. I grimaced, laughing softly at the image. Who is he? Rosalie shrugged, No clue. I think hes a student at U Dub. Im pretty sure they met out at a bar in Seattle. We know Edward will be heartbroken to know she is off the market. Jessica certainly had a lot of growing up to do without the complication of having eloped with a stranger. I actually felt kind of sorry for her. Although I knew she wasnt the most altruistic person, she had been my first friend in Forks. Silence fell over us, a comfortable, easy quiet. I closed my eyes. The sun felt delicious on my skin. I began watching Edward moving over me this morning behind my eyelids as I started to doze off. So, Bella... Rosalie drawled and my eyes jerked open. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Alice bolt upright next to me. I turned to her; her eyes were bright and excited. I interrupted Rosalie before she could continue, Where are Esme and Carlisle, by the way? I was genuinely curious, but also wanted to delay what I knew was coming.

She waved dismissively. They took the other boat to Rio to find stores for supplies for the cabin re-model. But, really, lets talk about you and sexy Eddie I groaned, dreading the approach of the Spanish Inquisition. Tell us all about our big brother in the sack. Rosalie said bluntly as she smiled sweetly at me. Alice squealed, clapping her hands. Wow, I mumbled. Start out with the small questions, Rosalie... Rosalie laughed. Come on. Weve been dying. Hes been a virgin for a century and has sex for the first time last week, with a human no less. You can understand our curiosity. I turned to Alice and pretended to glower. Just ask Alice for details, she seems to have seen most of it. Alice giggled. I just saw you putting on the black La Perla set and the stilettosI was particularly fond of those shoes, I knew theyd make your legs look about five hundred miles long she trailed off, then straightened up. But I swear I didnt see the rest of that night or much of any other one either. Its not like you guys decide too far in advance what youre going to do, right? She smiled, holding up her hand in a gesture of pledge. I nodded, remembering the night with the black lingerie. I was glad to know she didnt see what happened later. It was too personal to share. All right, some ground rules, I said, looking at each of them. Im not at all averse to sharing some details. Some. I clarified as they both clapped. But Ive never really had girlfriends where I talked about things like this, or even a boyfriend with whom details like this happened. Plus, hes your brother, so Im not entirely comfortable spilling everything. They both looked at me thoughtfully. Rosalie broke into a sly grin, Okay, fine. I get that. But seriously Edward seems like an entirely different person. The constant grin, its almost freaking me out. Im justwell, Im impressed. She looked me over, nodding. So, we can ask you yes or no questions, then? I hesitated. All right. Yes, no, or no comment. She nodded her agreement. Did you have sex the first night here? I nodded. They exchanged glances, raising their eyebrows at each other in silent communication. I sighed. The intimacy with my new sisters was fun, but already beginning to border on painful. Alice looked at me, Have you worn the blue lace boyshorts? Those were smoking hot and Edward cant control himself when you wear that color blue. I nodded, remembering the second night at the house when Edward took me roughly. I blushed. I know. Those were fabulous. Rosalie chuckled. Well return to that story when were not limited to yes or no.

Dont forget the no comment option, I reminded her. Whatever, she smiled at me, winking. She and Alice looked at each other, then both burst out at the same time, Did he go down on you yet? What? I gasped, feeling like we jumped from kindergarten to a dissertation thesis. I felt my cheeks burning. Uh, thats a yes, Rosalie giggled. And? Andwhat? I asked, avoiding their eyes. Bella. Alice cocked an eyebrow at me. We live for that. Dont pretend like you dont. I released a big breath, deciding to just give into it. I could definitely see living for that. They squealed. But its complicated. The venom. Oh my God Rosalie murmured and Alice gasped next to me. I had forgotten about that. Oh, Bella, did it hurt you? I rolled my eyes wanting to disappear. Not exactly. They stared at me. Rosalie growled, Are we going to have to drag every detail out of you? This is just so personal! I shrieked, covering my face. Bella, youre our sister now. There is no such thing as too personal, Alice smiled. Rosalie giggled. Im happy to share Emmetts measurements, if you like. I groaned. Please, no. Please God, dont. They both laughed at me, and waited for me to explain the venom issue. I think itwell, it kind of tingles. It becomes pretty intense if itsdown there I felt like I was going to combust I was so flushed. They both looked at me, nodding. And? And what? It tingles. A lot. I shrugged, hoping I didnt need to explain more. Of course it tingles. But who can complain about a continual orgasm? Rosalie looked at me in disbelief. I gaped at them. What? Wait, its the same for you guys? They nodded, smiling. And you didntblack out? They both slapped their hands over their mouths. The precision of their coordinated reaction was

almost comical. Pass out? Oh Bella thats awful! What happened? Alices voice was full of concern. Realization dawned on me. You guys cant hyperventilate. Of course not, youre vampires! A wide smile spread across my face. That means that when I change, I get all of the good, without the blacking out and humiliation! The both looked at me, trying to understand what I was talking about. What do you mean, humiliation? Alice whispered as though speaking about a grave tragedy. I sighed, realizing I was going to have to spell it out for them, wishing I had just answered, It was nice and left it at that. I was breathing too fast. I hyperventilated. I passed out, like a ton of completely un-sexy bricks. Twice. Rosalie said cautiously, So you didnt get it for very long, then. I chuckled at her phrasing, get it. Their faces were set in the most concerned and sympathetic expressions; it pushed me to laugh out loud. You guys, its not like there arent other things we can do. I shrugged. Not that I wouldnt mind more of that, but we had lots of fun. I left it at that. Before they could ask me any more probing questions we all noticed what looked like the wake behind an invisible motor boat. The guys were coming towards the boat, fast. We stood and walked to the edge, watching them approach. I couldnt possibly tell who was in the lead; they all appeared to be on top of each other; giant waves of water pushed away from a blur of bodies. The boat jerked hard once, and then a split-second later two successive thuds shook the boat. Alice jumped up and down as the boys climbed out of the water and hopped up on the deck. Edward walked over to me with a cocky smile plastered to his face. His chest was glistening. Want to kiss a champion? I squealed and wrapped my arms around him, kissing him as I pressed my body against his wet one. Alice was kissing Jasper in much the same way. Rosalie had her hands on either side of Emmetts face, comforting him. Aww, poor Emmett, I sighed, only half serious, pressing my body against my husband. Edward smirked. Dont feel too sorry for him. He wins the strength bets easily. Im just too fast for him. Besides, he was being a pain in the ass. Thats what Alice said, I laughed. He kissed me again and turned me so my back was against the railing. I pulled back, feeling him grow hard against my stomach. Edward He stepped back and pecked my nose, nodding. Jasper looked at him. Okay, Edward. Lets discuss punishments. What are my choices? Edward chuckled, clearly having fun with the decision. Okay, choice one: you wear the outfit of my choosing all day tomorrow, no argument, no details until tomorrow. Option two, you do karaoke to

Youre Beautiful by James Blunt. Jasper said, Outfit, all the way. Definitely the outfit. I laughed at his certainty. Emmett groaned, Aww, man. That is such a vag song. The guy even sounds like a chick. Edward chuckled. I know. Thats why it is such a good choice for you Emmett. Better get your falsetto warmed up for tonight. Alice turned to Edward, her eyes twinkling. Edward stared at her for a long moment and then laughed, turning to me. I cant believe you spilled! I dropped my face into my hands. I know. Trust me, I cant believe it either, I croaked. I looked up at Edward and he was positively beaming at me. *****

Chapter 14: Mosaic We all settled into the living room as Emmett entered the code for the song. I was still chuckling over his outfit: he had squeezed into a pink sweater dress of Rosalies, the fabric nearly ripped from the strain of stretching over his muscular body and the bottom barely covered the top of his thighs. The dress was a clear statement about the song. He glanced up and smirked at Edward, who was smiling happily, lounging in the chair. I looked over at Rosalie; her face was a mixture of excitement and curiosity. I sat on the floor next to her, leaning against the couch, feeling nervous for Emmett. I appeared to be alone in this sentiment. Emmett grumbled to himself, his deep voice resonating in the room. This isnt that bad. Its not like the time you made me drink the milk. He looked nauseated and glared at Edward. Edward chuckled from the chair, Whatever gets you through the song, Em. Im not sure you realize how high he sings. And youre totally smokin in pink cashmere, by the way, Jasper said quietly from the couch. If I werent already spoken for he raised his hand in claws, rawr. Just wait until tomorrow, Jazz, well see who's smokin then, Emmett laughed. Im going to rock it, whatever it is. Jaspers voice was barely a whisper as a smile curled his lips. Alice whistled between her fingers and climbed on Jaspers lap. Speaking of rocking, Emmett, lets see what youve got. Edward moved his hand in a gesture of forward progress. The opening chords began and Emmett put on a masked dreamy expression, his hand above his head in a feathery diva gesture. He began singing, My life is brilliant and then swore under his breath, laughing. His voice far too deep for the song, knowing Edwards punishment required a falsetto. His voice cracked continuously, profanities flying out with every verse.

His earnest attempts to sing high enough for the song, and largely failing as his usually deep, smooth voice came out in a cacophony of cracks, made the entire family laugh hysterically. He was laughing at himself equally hard, struggling to stay focused. I looked around the room. Everyone was enjoying Emmetts predicament, but not maliciously. The song ended and Emmett took a deep bow to our loud applause and catcalls. He had thrown enough swear words out during the process that Edward could have probably insisted on a do-over, but opted against it. He walked to Rosalie and I thought I heard him whisper, You are, you know. She kissed him softly. Esme chided him good-naturedly for his swearing, and suggested he take a note from Edwards book of respecting the English language. Edward and I exchanged an amused look, my eyes moving down to stare at the lips that uttered deliciously dirty words to me every time we were alone, my heart thudding in my chest. Jasper chuckled behind me, Very interesting reaction, Bella. I shot him a look over my shoulder, causing him to chuckle louder, the sound deep and happy. I hopped up and kissed Edward quickly before heading into the kitchen to make some dinner. The rest of my new siblings and husband sat down at a table to play Hearts. I heard Edward beg Emmett to keep his legs together next to him. Carlisle sat down at the laptop to do some work; Esme followed me into the kitchen. She walked to the pot rack and grabbed the pink apron hanging nearby, wrapping it around her waist. I blushed at the memory of the last time Id seen a vampire wearing that apron in this kitchen. Esme turned to me, Bella, you must be absolutely starving. Please let me make your dinner. Sit, talk with me. I smiled. Id love your company, Esme, but I really can cook my own dinner. She laughed and said, Im sure you can. But please, cooking is one of the most satisfying maternal behaviors I never get to experience. Its not like I get to bring my children mountain lions or deer. And I only get to spoil you like this for a short while. Let me enjoy this. I took in her words silently, considering her easy reference to my impending transformation, and then nodded, realizing I was only going to sound rude if I refused. I really wanted her to sit and relax. I felt like I owed her so much as it was. Besides, she said quietly, almost as if she had heard my thoughts, I could cook for you for a thousand dinners and not feel like Ive thanked you for what youve done for Edward. She shook her head in a gesture of wonder, turning her head to smile at me in open gratitude. Esme, I responded quietly, rubbing my toe along a line of grout between two ceramic floor tiles, I get much more in return from Edward. From all of you. She looked at me for a long moment, and then walked over to the refrigerator, pulling out some salmon and vegetables. She set some water boiling for rice and began cleaning the fish and cutting the vegetables. Youre so used to being entirely self-sufficient. She said the words as an observation, but it felt like a question. I suppose, I said, shrugging. My Mom is a good cook, but has almost set the kitchen on fire more

times than I could count. Charlie could cook a bowl of cereal and thats about it. In each case it was just easiest to fend for myself. Her look was soft. Im talking about more than just cooking. I adore your parents, Bella, and think they have done an amazing job raising a thoughtful, independent young woman. But our family operates differently. We depend on each other greatly. I just hope you can become more comfortable with the ways we take care of each other without hesitation, without need for repayment. Youre a part of this now, and will be forever. You give us new life. She looked at my hands clenched in front of me. You bring more to the table than we do, but I dont think you feel that way, do you? I felt tears stinging the back of my eyes from the warmth in her words and looked away, out the window at the moon reflecting off of the waves. I feel overwhelmed by your generosity and unable to articulate everything I feel I owe your family. But I do appreciate what youre saying, Esme. I smiled at her, shrugging. She nodded her understanding. She referred to a cookbook briefly before whisking some butter and flour in a saucepan, adding a bit of cream, followed a minute later by a dash of lemon juice and some capers. The smells were delicious; I was famished. Do you want wine or something else with dinner? she asked me. I stood up, heading over to the cupboard to grab a glass for water. Just water for me tonight. Last time I had any wine in this kitchen I ended up grilling your son about how he was going to change me. The words were out before I realized what I was saying. Esme laughed softly and the sound was warm and comfortable. I threw her an embarrassed smile and took the food over to the table. Thank you Esme, this looksamazing. And it did. I began to devour my dinner, Esme sat across from me, re-arranging the flowers she had brought into the house earlier in the day. Im sure that was a fun conversation. She winked at me. He is stubborn, but more than anything he is scared. Every day you are together he is more afraid of losing you, of doing itwrong, she said quietly, apparently not needing to be brought up to speed on the conversation Edward and I had had that night. I guessed this was another thing Edward had discussed with Carlisle their first night here. I blushed hotly. I know, I mumbled and stared into my glass of water, really not wanting to get into it. The idea that Esme knew that I wanted Edward to bite me after we made love made me slightly uncomfortable. I would want the same thing you do, though. She leaned towards me and smiled conspiratorially. I laughed despite my mortification, shaking my head. Esme was an amazing combination of mother and older sister. Edward appeared in the doorway to the kitchen, Hows dinner, my love? There was a gleam in his eye; he knew what we had been discussing. Mmm, Esme made me the most delicious salmon. Im inhaling it. I laughed, looking at my almost

empty plate. Good. He smiled at me as he leaned against the doorframe. You havent eaten much today. His eyes were concerned, surveying me carefully. Esme walked over to me and kissed the top of my head softly, whispering, Good night, love, before leaving the kitchen to go find Carlisle. She touched Edwards cheek and whispered something too quietly for me to hear as she ducked out of the kitchen. I looked at the clock and realized it was almost midnight. The day flew by so fast with everyone around us. Thank you, again, Esme. It was delicious, I called to her, she turned back and winked. Edward came over to stand behind me and rubbed my shoulders, before leaning to kiss my neck. Do you want to play some cards? he asked, gesturing for me to come into the living room. Alice is creaming us at Hearts and shes completely adorable. No, I actually think Im going to turn in. At my words, he began to walk to the living room, presumably planning to ask everyone to leave. No, Edward, stay. Play cards. Im exhausted and I know youre all having fun. I took my dishes to the sink, beginning to clean up what Esme hadnt already washed. He stopped me. Ill clean this up. Go lie down, Bella. Well finish this round and then Ill come to bed. He pulled me to him and kissed me, opening his mouth against my lips as his eyes stared into mine. He ran his hands down my back andh is touch flipped a switch in me. I pushed my hips against his thighs, grunting softly against his kiss. He moaned and I felt his erection beginning to push against my stomach. Ill come to bed very soon. I miss you, I whispered against his chest. You have permission to ravage me in my sleep. He groaned against my neck and kissed me softly before letting me go. I said goodnight to the rest of my new family and headed into the bedroom, the sound of their laughter and teasing ringing off the walls. ***** I was dreaming about Edward, his body over mine, behind me, inside me. His hands rubbed my legs, he was on top of me, and then behind me again, his fingers moving up grab the flesh of my ass, pushing his cock between my cheeks. Bella are you sure? he asked quietly as his hips shook slightly against my ass. Please, baby, I moaned, pushing back against him. He rubbed his wet fingers against the soft skin, pushing a finger into my backside and I heard something moving next to me, Edwards quiet moaning, and a cold hand on my inner thigh. I opened my eyes; my lids were heavy and I felt blind in the darkness of the room. I blinked and Edward slowly came into focus. He was kneeling in front of me, one hand pushing my naked legs

apart, his other hand stroking himself above me. Bella you were dreaming about me. Your heartbeat matched how it is when Im inside you. Baby, tell me about your dream. His voice was a whisper and he moaned as he slipped his fingers inside me. I pulled him down on me and grabbed his cock, guiding him into me. My limbs melted around his cold skin, and my body felt leaden with the remnants of sleep and the intensity of what I had dreamt. Edward moved my arms above my head, holding them there with one hand as the other moved underneath me, grabbing my ass and pushing himself deeper into me. I grabbed him tightly around the waist with my legs, and began rocking against him. I panted into his neck and felt myself losing all inhibitions at the memory of my dream, the memory of wanting something so much it left a physical trail of need inside me. I think I moaned, Unhhh Edward, you feel so good Bella he grunted, pushing into me. I think we were going to I whimpered as he sucked gently on my shoulder. I think we were going to have anal sex His cock turned to beautiful concrete inside me at my words and his moan sounded almost pained. Oh Edward, you are so hard. His breath was steady but sharp against my ear and when he finally spoke, his voice a growl. Fuck, BellaI needoh God youre so close His lips coursed down my neck and his mouth captured my nipple. The venom spread across my chest and my orgasm hit me hard. My back arched up off the bed as my arms were still pinned above me in delicious captivity. He didnt slow in me as he usually did to bring me down from my climax. Do you want to try that? I could feel the urgency of his words in the tight coil of his body, in the tension in his voice. I nodded, breathing hard, I want to try everything with you. The answer was simple and honest. He buried his face in my neck, murmuring my name. I knew we were just discovering each other, but I wanted no boundaries with Edward, ever. He released my arms and dug his hand in my hair, moving over me with the same urgency. that sounds so good Have you thought about it? I whispered, scratching his back lightly. Yes. Do you want it? God, yes, he murmured. Bella, I cant picture I dont want to come yet fuck He slowed his movements and kissed my ear, face, and neck, his eyes moving over my face, his need

for me written all over his expression. I miss you, he whispered just as his lips met mine. I missed you today; I need more than just nights with you we oh... his body began trembling over me; I could tell he was close. We need a better balance. He flipped us over so I was on top of him but he sat up beneath me and pressed his chest against mine. I couldnt find words to respond in kind as I rolled my hips over him; my moans would have to suffice. I was close to climax again, his hands in my hair holding my ear against his lips, his breath cold in my ear. I love you more than anything Bella, I need more of you. Im insatiableI cant get enough please oh God I can feel you coming, yes I felt myself on the edge of continually falling, of orgasms coming up beneath me, consuming me. I couldnt even form words, realizing how much I missed his touch all day. I needed him to consume me. I put my fingers below me, at the base of his cock, and squeezed my index and middle fingers together around him. He cried out, Yes, harder My climax rocked me and I was unable to make a sound; I arched away from him in a silent scream. His mouth claimed my breasts hungrily as he slowed his upwards thrusting, moaning, Bella, Im going to come so hardlet go of me and flipped me back over onto my back before pulling out of me and kneeling between my legs. He stroked his cock and grunted as he began pulsing above me, spilling all over my stomach. He groaned at the sight, staring at my abdomen, now drenched by him. He fell down beside me, listening to my heavy breathing and placing his head on my breast. After several quiet minutes, he grabbed a towel by his pillow, wiping me off gently. Ive been thinking about doing that all day long. He chuckled at himself, I dont want to be away from you so many hours. Its hard to share you. He turned his head and kissed my breast. I guess I needed to claim you tonight. I curled up against him, pushing my face into his neck and whispering his name. My body felt heavy and weak from climaxing so hard, from witnessing the force of his orgasm over me, and from my frantic need to have his arms around me, have his lips touching every inch of me. Cover me, I murmured. I need you everywhere at once. He complied, wrapping his cool arms and legs around me. You are my everything. ***** I rolled onto the pillow next to me and woke as a piece of paper crunched under my face. I grabbed it and unstuck it from my bottom lip, squinting to read the beautiful penmanship. Off to get Jaspers outfit and some other goodies in Rio. If you wake and Im not here, Im not far.

Muffins in kitchen. I cant wait to see you. ~E. I climbed out of bed and took a long shower, afterwards pulling on a simple black one piece bathing suit and a blue silk wrap, piling my hair in a high messy knot. I grabbed a warm blueberry muffin from the counter and walked out onto the beach where Alice and Esme were quietly watching the surf crash violently on some rocks down the beach. They saw my approach and Alice started bouncing, waving to me. Good morning, Mrs Cullen! Alice clapped. I hope you slept well! Your husband is almost back with the most awesome outfit for Jazz. She was giddy. I laughed, Im sure he had fun finding goodies in Rio of all places. I bet its very Carnivale. Alice laughed, Some parts of it are. And he definitely found goodies. Esme missed her wink at me, but I definitely caught it. As if on cue, I saw Edward approaching the dock in the smaller boat. He grabbed a couple of bags and leapt onto the beach, running to us. He picked me up and pulled me into a deep, full kiss. Did you miss me? he whispered into my hair as I nodded against his breath. Esme and Alice chuckled next to us. Did you just now remember were crashing your honeymoon? Esme asked, looking down the beach as the rest of the family ran towards us after a hunt in the woods. Jasper approached, looking curiously at a bag in Edwards hand. Edward handed him the bag silently, a wide grin on his face, and Jasper turned towards the boat, laughing. Ill be right back, he said in his slow, quiet voice. Ladies, prepare to be overcome with lust. We stood in place, waiting for Jasper to emerge, everyone but Alice and Edward making bets on what he would be wearing. A few minutes later he climbed from the boat and we all dissolved into hysterics. He had a gigantic blue and red feather headdress on top of his head; the bright plumes probably reached three feet in a 270 degree arc around his face. The entire band of the crown across his forehead was covered in green sequins. The headdress was clearly the focal point of his outfit, but it wasnt the only thing he had on. My eyes traveled down his sculpted torso, which was bare except for a couple of sparkly stickers over his nipples, and lower to a miniscule leopard print Speedo. I blushed furiously; the Speedo barely containedanything. I shot Edward a look, Why? He laughed, nodding to Alices gaping expression. Apparently reality was better than the vision. Jaspers legs were bare, but his feet were covered in plush Homer Simpson slippers. I laughed out loud when I saw the slippers. He walked towards us, completely at ease, almost as if he were wearing his usual black jeans and t-shirt. Edward smiled at Jaspers appearance, I like what you did with the stickers. I kind of left that one up to you.

Jasper rubbed them, laughing. Nice, I smiled, looking at Edward. Very original. Alice was buzzing next to me, clearly noticing only the Speedo. Edward smiled at me and then looked back at Jasper. I thought he needed some color. He laughed and added, I actually just grabbed things from the first few stores at the harbor. I didnt want to be gone long. He snaked his arms around me and leaned to nuzzle my neck. I got you a present too, love. Something for our future adventures, he purred into my ear before darting his tongue against my earlobe. I could hear the smile in his voice and I turned to look at him. His eyes were full of fire and mischief. I leaned against him, moaning softly at the realization that this was my life now strange surreal antics, family bonding, and overwhelming intimacy with Edward every day. Jasper looked at me and laughed, I am guessing its not the sight of me in these slippers that is putting you in that mood, Bella. ***** We played in the water for a while. Edward let Jasper take off the slippers and headdress while he swam, and when he emerged, I was sad to see that his sparkly Hello Kitty stickers had probably disappeared in the surf. I crawled up onto the sand and everyone played Chicken in the water while I watched, feeling delicate and clumsy. Edward looked up at me watching them play and his face contorted into an expression I couldnt read. Almost nostalgic, maybe determined. Definitely something I couldnt decipher. He put Alice down and came over to me, pulling me up by my hand wordlessly. He grabbed a surfboard, and put me on it when the water was waist-high. He took us out far into the water, out of sight of the beach, pulling me on the board. Stopping just past the waves in the calm water, he slid me off the side of the board and into his arms. His lips were salty and hungry as his mouth covered mine. Below the water, his hands were impatient. His entire demeanor was communicating something different, something more intense since this morning. Sharks, Edward I murmured against his lips, suddenly terrified of what swam beneath the board I clung to as our legs dangled in the water. Nothing like that would come anywhere near me, he reassured me as he pulled off my bathing suit, hooking it over his arm. Youre completely safe. He lifted me onto the board, steadying it with his hand and pulling me to the edge. Our weight dipped the end into the water. Edward spread my legs at the edge and lowered his face into the water, leaving only his golden eyes above the water line. I startled when I felt his tongue circling my clit, gently probing at first, and then when he saw that I could handle it, more vigorously, sucking and thrusting his tongue into me. I laid back against the board, relishing the feeling of his mouth on my sensitive flesh while the sun beat down on my naked body. I wrapped my legs wrapped around his neck and he moaned, nodding

against me at the new position. As my orgasm quickly approached, he slowly stroked the skin around my backside with his finger, before gently pushing a fingertip just inside me, slowly in and out. He watched my face to measure my response and I groaned loudly; the sensation was unbelievable and my climax escalated and continued, unending and gripping. He whimpered and his lips grew almost frantic as I cried his name into the open air. ***** We returned to the beach to find Alice and Emmett wrestling in the sand, Carlisle and Esme sitting together in the shade of a cabana. Rosalie was lying in the sun, gorgeous in a white one-piece. Jasper sat in the shade alone, reading a book, his headdress sparkling from indirect sun. I went inside to make myself a sandwich as Edward joined Alice and Emmett by the water. I carried a blanket outside and spread it in the shade of a palm, sitting down to eat my lunch. I looked up and found myself staring straight at Jaspers bulging animal print crotch not three feet from my face. I startled and my wide eyes traveled up to meet his amused expression. Dont be embarrassed. I approached quietly. May I join you? I nodded, swallowing a bite of sandwich and patting the space next to me. Sit down, princess. Jasper sat down a bit farther away than I had indicated, leaning his elbows on his bent knees. I was struck with how comfortable each of them was in their own bodies and wondered if the same would be true for me someday. Only with Edward was I comfortable being totally exposed. We sat in silence for several minutes while I ate my sandwich and Jasper watched his siblings doing one-armed hand-stands on the sand. Finally, I had to ask: "You dont strike me as the exhibitionist type. Why did you choose the outfit over the song?" He smiled down at the sand. "Emmett would have enjoyed the outfit too much, no matter what Edward chose. I dont care either way. I took this in, seeing his point. I looked at the faint scars on his arms and chest, thinking about his past, and all the things he had seen. I wondered how long it had taken Jasper to trust his family to trust anyone. We sat in silence for awhile again and I wasn't sure why he had joined me but it was an easy silence. I had the feeling he wasn't influencing our mood, that we were both relaxed and enjoying the quiet company. It occurred to me that Jasper and I shared a certain reserve. I wondered why I hadn't appreciated it before. "You feel better," he said quietly, cryptically. I laughed, "What is it with you and Alice and the non-questions?" He looked at me with a small smile playing on his lips. "It wasn't intended as a question, Bella. It was an observation."

"Oh." I watched him. He knew I watched him and he didnt stir, didnt feel the need to return my gaze. He stared out at the water for several long minutes. "In a time of less tension, I wanted to say again, Im so sorry about your birthday, Bella." His words were simple and delivered without defense. I knew he didn't need reassurance. He knew how I felt about it, but I wanted to address it anyway. "I know you are Jasper. I never blamed you." He looked at me and nodded slightly. I realized that was probably the last time we would ever talk about that night. Jasper's way of dealing with things suited me very well: say it and be done. I watched him again, waiting to find out what else he was thinking. "Edward was a wreck when he left you. I cant even imagine what it would have been like to be near him when he was away from you. But even after Italy, even after you two were reunitedhe was so emotionally raw. You were too, but you didn't really know it then." He turned and looked at me. My heart was lodged in my larynx, I was unable to respond. I knew what he meant now, about me feeling better. He watched me quietly. "It seems like you've talked about it. It seems like you know now how hes always felt. I nodded and he murmured, I would have tried to tell you, to alleviate your pain. Unfortunately, there really are no words for what he feels." He looked back at the beach. No, I agreed. He looked at me again and said, Despite your blush, you dont mind when I look at you. I looked at him, Non question? He nodded, Observation. I shrugged, To the contrary, I would say I do mind being watched. He shook his head. That isnt what I said. You dont like being dissected. But I think you appreciate being seen. What he was saying felt like a cartoon anvil falling onto my head. He articulated exactly what I felt around my new family. I felt like when they looked at me, they saw my intentions rather than my mistakes. They saw who I wanted to be for them and let the other, less desirable things fall away. I thought back to our time in Arizona, to my escape from his and Alices protection and felt a pang that I had put them all in danger, a pang over my naivet. And yet they all seemed to be apologizing to me for who they were. It struck me that Jasper would probably come to be a very important person to me. The instant I saw ahead to what our relationship would become, still not knowing him very well at all at this moment, felt surreal and I laughed quietly. He didnt turn to me, but I could feel him smiling. In spite of that realization, or perhaps because of it, it didn't feel strange that our conversation had

started out intensely and not altered course. "Do you get tired always feeling everyone feelings?" I asked. "Tired as in exhausted? Or as in exasperated?" He pushed on Homer Simpsons face, looking at me out of the corner of his eye. "Either," I allowed. "Exhausted, yes. Exasperated, never." His voice was quiet. You and Edward have talked abouthis changing you. His amber eyes were lined with thick lashes, his lips full, and a dimple played on his cheek. I rarely looked so closely at Jasper and only now realized how beautiful he was. He laughed. Sorry, that one was a question. I nodded in response. He sat for a moment, seeming to listen to something, and then said mostly to himself, Youre not afraid. Its true. I wanted to ask him what he meant, but also didnt. Was everyone going to ask me about this? Was Edward talking to all of them about what I had asked of him? I changed the subject instead of pressing. "Who, other than Alice is easiest for you to be around?" "Emmett," he said, and I was struck by the confidence of his reply. He interpreted my silence correctly and continued. "Hes a loud fun guy on the surface, but there is so much warmth there. Emmett has no pretenses and that is what I love about him; when he's happy, he's happy. When he's mad, he's mad. There aren't a lot of mosaic feelings there that I have to wade through." He shrugged, smiling at me. "He has better intentions than almost anyone. He loves unconditionally." He studied my face for a few more moments, causing a blush to creep over my cheeks. Youre easy for me to be around in that sense. You are not complicated. I felt the compliment in his words and smiled. And it will be easier he trailed off, turning his face away from me as the breeze picked up; I realized he was down-wind from me. I was so content talking to Jasper; I felt a rush of warmth and knew it came directly from me. He looked at me and smiled, touching my arm softly. "Thank you for that." He kissed the top of my head as he stood and walked down the beach towards Alice. *****

Chapter 15: Intimacy I told Edward about my conversation with Jasper as I finished dinner. It was just Edward and I; we had decided we wanted a night just the two of us. He listened without interrupting, apparently fascinated by my version of events. It just felt likeI dont know, like Id known him forever. I thought about how easy it was to be with Jasper. When he sat down, it seemed as though we were picking up a conversation we had started a long time ago. Edwards expression was open and happy, he seemed thrilled to hear

about my day and my connection with his brother. He is in awe of you, he said. Hes not sure what to make of you, I can tell, but his thoughts were very similar to yours. I smiled at that, even though I had known somehow that was true. A sneaky smile spread across his face. And his thoughts are purely brotherly and admirable, Im happy to report. I laughed, Edward, do you remember the Speedo he was wearing? I think I would have known if his thoughts strayed even slightly into non-brother territory. He laughed as he walked over and kissed me slowly, his lips moving along mine, down my jaw to my neck. Im going to go take a shower. Come meet me in the bedroom in a few minutes? I nodded at his surprisingly specific instructions, noticing he had not asked me to join him for a shower. He turned to leave, looking at me over his shoulder with smoldering eyes as he left the room. I took my dishes to the sink, rinsing them quickly before Edward started the water. I heard the shower start and sat down to write a quick postcard to Charlie and one to Renee and Phil to mail the next time someone went into Rio. I turned out the lights in the living room and walked to the bedroom. ***** I gasped at the sight of the room. Tiny tea light candles covered almost every flat surface, creating hundreds of flickering shadows along the wall. The bed was made with black satin sheets I didnt recognize, the regular blankets folded and placed on the chair in the corner. Apparently I wasnt going to be curling up in bed to sleep quite yet. I saw a piece of paper on the bed and walked over and picked it up. Get naked. The two words made my body feel dense and warm. I slipped out of my wrap and my bathing suit, pulling my hair out of the bun and letting it flow down my back. I sat on the edge of the bed, wondering when Edward was going to join me. A black box sat on my bedside table. There was no note, no indication of whether I was supposed to look inside. I could still hear the shower running and risked peeking into the box. Inside there was a jelly-like ring with little nubs along the outside diameter and what looked like a bullet on either end, a short pink rubber toy, a tube of what I guessed was lube, and a long, thick vibrator. I felt myself blushing and put the lid back on the box quickly, as quietly as I could. Right at that moment, the shower turned off and Edward stepped out of the bathroom, already mostly dry. I realized he had been listening to me. He was grinning at me, his expression amused. He dropped the towel on the floor, walking to me naked and beautiful. Like your presents? What presents? I asked, playing innocent. He played along. Oh, you didnt peek at this box right here? He cocked an eyebrow as he kneeled on the floor in front of me.

Oh, of course I peeked, I smiled at him. But, Im not sure what everything in that box is for Do you want me to tell you or show you? His amber eyes burned into mine as his hand caressed the back of my calf. Show me, I whispered. He lifted my foot and began kissing his way up my leg before pulling back. Before we get too carried away, we need to set a ground rule. He resumed kissing my calf up to my knee, waiting for me to respond. Okay. About your fantasy last nightcan I call it a fantasy? He looked at me and my entire body began throbbing at his expression. I nodded and his smile in response was beyond sensual. Good. He kissed my knee again, stroking my leg softly with his hands. I want to try everything with you, too. But I ask that we start by exploring some of these newsensationsand take some time to work up to actualpenetration. I gasped at his words, feeling my cheeks flushing hot. The rest of my body responded with something far more wanton than embarrassment. He laughed softly. You do love it when I talk to you about sex, my little kitten. He dragged his tongue up the inside of my knee, reaching my thigh before stopping. He looked at me again and his eyes were serious. Im not sure I can penetrate you that way without hurting you. That might be something we want to savefor after He looked at me and I nodded my understanding. At this point I didnt care how he took me; I just needed him inside me. But as a consolation, as you already know, I got us some toys. He stood up and walked over to the nightstand, opening the drawer and pulling out the black sashes I had used to tie him to the bed a few nights before. Is it okay if I blindfold you? he murmured. I just want you to feel. I nodded and he wrapped one of sashes around my eyes, circling my head two times, and tying it firmly but gently at the back of my head. The other he used to tie my hands together. This okay? he whispered, running his hands down my arms. Yes. My voice was shaky and breathless. My knees were bent at the edge of the bed and I heard him moving around on the floor near me. Suddenly every other sense was heightened. His cold skin, while not touching me, brought goose bumps to the flesh of my legs. I heard his breathing, low and deep; he was inhaling the scent of my arousal. His own smell was overwhelming to me with my blindfold on, and I felt like I was drenching the sheets beneath me. I felt Edward move in front of me, as he whispered, Do you trust me?

I nodded, parting my lips as my need for him made my chest heave. I felt his cold lips press gently against mine and his tongue pushed my lips apart. His sweet breath swirled over my tongue. Bella, do you know how much I love you? I moaned against him, my bound hands reaching for him but not finding his body in front of me anymore, his lips suddenly gone from mine. His mouth touched the back of my neck as I felt him land quietly behind me on the bed. Your skin is so beautiful, so perfect under my fingers he reached a hand around my body and a feather touch ran along my breast, the pressure increasing as he pinched my nipple. I cried out, arching my back against his hand and leaning back against him but he was gone. I ended up lying down on the bed with my legs hanging over the edge. I reached my hands above my head, feeling for him. Thats right, lie down my love. He was in front of me again and his cool hands pushed my legs apart. He blew a stream of cool air across my sex You smell so good Bella, can I taste you? Yes. I felt his soft hair graze the skin between my knees as he leaned forward and let his tongue dart against my wet skin. Bella, you are so wet, oh Godyou taste so good He pushed his face into my folds and I felt his tongue circling me quickly before I began to gasp for air. His breath came out fast and deep against my thighs. Bella I need you to take a deep breath. Focus on breathing. I need to taste you more. I tried to slow down, to focus on taking deep breaths, knowing that his mouth was going to touch me again. Good, baby, he whispered, kissing my thighs. He licked me gently, gauging my response, and then more vigorously when he could tell I was okay. Its just me and you, he murmured and I felt something cold at my entrance and pushed my hips towards him. It began vibrating and he pushed it in me as his tongue gently sucked my clit. I bucked my hips against his mouth. Edward, oh God, yes He moved his mouth away as my breathing picked up, and pulled the vibrator out of me and pressed it gently against my clit. I had never felt anything like it and with the effects of the venom I was approaching a massive climax. He pushed two fingers in me and pumped them in and out of me as I whimpered his name. Edward Im so close, so close, so close Oh Bella, youre so tight around my fingers. Does that feel good? Do you like my fingers inside of you? His voice was barely a whisper, almost a groan. I moaned in reply. When I was on the verge of climaxing he pulled the toy back, and spread my legs far apart. I could only feel his breath against my skin and cried out at the loss, squirming on the bed for release, pushing towards his face, begging him to let me come. He pushed my legs up against my chest, keeping them spread. I felt his fingers rubbing some lube on my backside and the liquid felt warm on his cool fingers. The sensation was mind-blowing, already

pushing me towards climax. Relax, sweet girl his voice was unbelievably deep and my hips pushed towards his voice. He gently pushed a finger inside me then, moving it slowly in and out for awhile before carefully adding another one, all the time kissing my legs and whispering to me in a low murmur. He removed his fingers and replaced them with the small rubber toy. I cried out in pleasure, pushing against his hand as he licked my thigh. The feeling of the small plug in me there made me moan uncontrollably. Edwardunhhh fuck I moaned, almost a whimper. Do you like that? he murmured, moving the toy in and out slowly. Does it feel good? God yes. It makes me want to feel you there. I thought I had spoken the words out loud but wasnt sure until I heard him swallow loudly. So you want this? he asked in a shaky voice and I felt him slide his cock over my clit and to my entrance. I nodded vigorously, my arms stretched out above my head. He slid inside me, groaning loudly as my legs gave out, falling to the side. He rocked over me for only a moment before the sensation exploded inside me, and a primitive cry escaped my lips as I climaxed violently around him. Oh God Bella, oh God he moaned, kissing my breasts and thrusting against me feverishly. After what felt like forever my orgasm subsided, and Edward focused on his own body, grunting and moaning my name with each movement of his hips. He began to shake and finally pushed deep inside me, cursing loudly as he released. I couldnt see him, but could feel him over me, trembling and steadying himself. I was left, spent and panting on the bed, one of my bound arms over my forehead. Edward slowly moved out of me and pulled the plug from my backside as I gasped at the sensation. He climbed up over me, lifting my blindfold and wearing an expression of intensity unlike anything I had seen before. He untied my hands and tangled his fingers in my hair, rubbing his renewed erection against my thighs. You completely blow me away, Bella. He covered my mouth with his. We kissed for awhile, enjoying some heavy petting until his breathing became deeper and his body was hard and faintly pulsing. I love what you want to do with me, he murmured, dragging his tongue down my neck. I love that you dont hold anything back. I rolled him onto his back and straddled his thighs. He propped himself on his elbows, watching me reach to the nightstand for some of the lube as a crooked smile played on his lips. I handed it to him, unsure, and he took the bottle and dribbled some on my palm. I rubbed my hand along his head before squeezing down his shaft, stroking him slowly. His eyes were fixed on my hands and he gripped the sheets next to his sides. Your hands feel so good faster baby

I moved faster on him, cupping his scrotum with one hand and stroking him quickly with the other, squeezing him as I moved up and down him. I watched his beautiful face intently, knowing just the sight of this was causing me to soak his thigh. Oh Godsqueeze me harder, you sexy girl, grab me he moaned, and his gaze never wavered from where my hands moved over him. Bella, Im so close so close so close so close Bella His legs began trembling with his now-familiar efforts to contain the strength of his release. I plunged my mouth over him and his hips shot off the bed as his cries echoed off the wall. Oh fuck he groaned as his cock pulsed against my tongue. I stared up at him and his eyes never closed, never moved from the sight of me over him. Slowly his body stopped moving and his hand rested on my shoulder, silently urging me to still. I looked up at him and felt my chest clench at his expression. His face was wild with need for me. Bella, ImI need He pulled me up to his face and kissed me passionately as his moans came out continuously in my mouth. ***** We spoke for hours in the dark. I could hardly see him, but his pale skin glowed slightly in the black room with the moon only a sliver in the sky outside and the tea lights long since extinguished. I knew he could see every move I made, could process every expression. He traced my lips with his fingertips and I felt his eyes constantly trained on my face. I need you more every time we make love. I dont know how to explain it. I dont know how I am ever going to get enough of you. He sounded feverish. Your body begs me for more and I want to give it, I do. I need more, all the time. Its almost like I cant show you or tell you how I feel but its growing, and its hard to contain His voice was almost pained. Before I could process my own words they were out of my mouth: Change me. Change me now. Change me because you want to keep me forever. Change me because of what we just gave each other. Change me because you know I need you more than anything in this world. It came out as a whisper and my heart was racing, my mind frantic with the intimacy we just shared. He sighed against my lips. I do want you forever. I want you more than that; I am insane with need for you. But this isnt it. This isnt how it happens. Edward, please, hear me, I said softly against him, not wanting to ruin the moment but knowing how right it felt. Bella, cant you trust me? he whispered earnestly as he pulled my face to his, his lips needing mine, his breath cold on my chin. I need you so much, please just let me do this my way. I looked at him and my heart pounded heavily with passion, need, longing, and everything there were no words to describe. I just want my last human memories to be us, like this. I want a say in how this happens. I cant start eternity with you only on your terms.

I knew that my quiet words, even delivered with kisses, with soft touches all over his face, managed to stun him slightly. I do hear you, Bella. Please believe that I hear you. Please just have some faith in me. He kissed me softly, pulling me to his chest. I whispered my love to him and fell asleep shortly thereafter, exhausted. I had said everything I could say. ***** Morning sun. Cool hands stroking my skin and a soft, constant stream of words spoken by his deep voice. My whole body was sore from our lovemaking and my mind was deliciously clouded with the memories of our limbs tangled together, of his hands, his sounds, his body moving around me and inside me. Edward smiled at me as I opened my eyes and stretched. He leaned and gently kissed my shoulder. I love you. I love you so much, I whispered. He pulled me close in response and sighed quietly, content. I realized he was drained too; he was so rarely out of words. My throat was dry and I was famished. Im going to get some water and some fruit. Ill be right back. I kissed him again and extricated myself from his arms. He nodded, sitting up in bed, and rubbing his head absently. As I walked around to the door he was heading towards the bathroom to shower, mindful of his siblings sensitive olfactory systems. I walked into the kitchen, inhaling deeply with the scent of the ocean coming through the open windows. In what would later feel like slow-motion, I stepped onto a wet tile and slipped on the floor. I crashed forward, slamming my head onto a corner of the counter and crumpling in a pile onto the floor. Disoriented and dizzy, I scrambled to my feet before stumbling against the center island under weak legs and sliding down again onto the tile. I brought my hand to my forehead and looked at it; it was covered with blood. My hand disappeared from view as blood ran into my eyes, turning my vision black. I felt the familiar wave of dizziness and saw Edward race into the room just before I blacked out. *****

Chapter 16: Good For Us Bella. Bella. Edwards voice was pained. Bella! Shit. Open your eyes. My eyelids fluttered open and he immediately grabbed my hand, pushing it against a towel on my head. Thank God! Hold this. I realized what had happened and gasped. Oh God, Edward, get Carlisle! Bella, he said, ignoring me. You need stitches. Hold this here while I get the bag.

I held the towel against my throbbing head. I really did feel exactly as I would expect to feel after falling headfirst into a gigantic marble counter. I blinked and looked around, feeling disoriented and nauseous. Edward had picked me up off the floor apparently and placed me, naked, on the counter. He was gone and back in an instant with a large black bag. He rummaged through it in a blur. He pulled on gloves, grabbed a suture kit, a lidocaine syringe, and some alcohol and iodine wipes. He clearly wasnt breathing. I focused on his face, his expression was pained but determined. He pulled the towel away, and his eyes darkened as as he surveyed the cut. Edward, get Carlisle, I urged again, feeling my heart pounding in my chest. This was not good. Hes hunting on the mainland. If I cant do this Bella, I cant even imagine He let his words hang in the air. His voice was deep and unfamiliar. My eyes burned into his, begging him to meet my gaze. Edward, we cant do this forever. I am bound to fall, a lot. Its a miracle weve been together a week without me bleeding. His eyes met mine briefly, meaningfully, before he focused again on the cut. Well, except the whole virginity thing I trailed off in understanding, wondering if that was actually much harder for him than he had let on at the time. His face was wracked with agony; I had never seen him like this. His mouth was only inches from mine and I longed to kiss him, to reassure him. This may hurt a bit. He sounded almost angry. He injected lidocaine into a couple different spots on my forehead as he held gauze to the cut. I had no idea how big the cut was, but judging from the blood on the towel I was holding, it was a pretty nasty gash. He cleaned the area with alcohol and iodine and opened the sterile suture kit. Bella, get rid of the towel. I looked down at the bloodstained towel I clutched in my lap and threw it into the sink. Spread your legs, he growled. What? I wasnt sure that I had heard him right. Please, Bella, I need to smell you a different way. Spread your legs. His voice was pleading now, softer. I spread my legs and he relaxed slightly. Distract me, now, please. His hands were steady as he began suturing my cut, but his eyes betrayed the torment he was fighting. Distract you, how? I hated having to ask him to be more specific, putting any more strain on him, but I didnt want to do anything wrong. He let out a low cry, Just distract me, please, Bella His voice was agonized as his hands worked as

fast as they could without tearing my delicate flesh. I pushed my index finger inside of me, feeling my own wetness mixed with Edwards semen inside me from the middle of the night. I brought my finger to his lips, drawing it along his mouth and looking into his eyes. I love you, I whispered. Edward, taste. He inhaled a tiny bit, and let his tongue touch his lower lip. I moaned reflexively, seeing him tasting us. His eyes met mine and his expression was still pained but mixed with something else nowlust, but sexual lust. Its us. Its both of us in you, he said quietly. Yes, I whispered. His hands worked gently on my forehead. I could feel tugging but no pain; my skin was numb. I was completely focused on him and reducing his agony. More, Bella, please. Again. I repeated my action, letting my fingers touch his lip then come to rest on his cheek. While he licked his lip, he brought some scissors to my head, cutting the sutures, and wiping the area with some ointment. He put a gauze bandage over my head, pressing it firmly. He pulled the bloody gloves off his hands and threw them and all the tools into the garbage can and carried it to the door. He moved to the sink to wash his hands and then grab a bottle of bleach from under the sink and generously doused the contents of the garbage can outside the kitchen door. He came back in and poured some on the tiles. He scrubbed the tiles and the counter, and then took the sponge to the sink before washing his hands again. My eyes burned with the bleach fumes and I blinked to keep my vision clear, watching my husband feverishly remove all traces of my blood. All of this clean up took less than ten seconds, and when he was done, he stood at the sink, naked, frozen, his shoulders hunched, and his hands gripping the porcelain. Edward, come here. He didnt move. Edward, come here. Something deep inside me told me what he needed. He turned and walked to me. I almost cried at his expression: tight, nervous, and desperate. I pulled him into my arms but he remained stiff and unmoving against me. He was scared, he didnt trust himself. I let go of him and laid back against the counter. I brought my heels up to the edge and spread my legs open to him. He watched me move and stepped forward. Wordlessly, he pushed into me, and thrust himself against my hips as he whimpered softly. His eyes stared at where he disappeared inside me and his fingertips ran along my sex, almost reassuring himself that he was moving in me, making love to me.

His fingers grazed his length as he slid in and out. He didnt make a sound. He simply grabbed my thighs and drove into me over and over, bruising me I knew. I didnt care. His gaze never left the sight of us coming together, he never blinked, but I could see him inhaling deeply, see his face relax, his amber eyes soften. Yes, baby, let go I whispered. His movements quickened, and his legs shuddered behind me as he pumped into me, hungry and needy. He cried out, a dry sob, as he twitched in me, feeling his orgasm approach. Finally, his eyes met mine as he came, and the raw need on his face was excruciating. I dont know how to do it! he cried after he came into me, his head falling against my stomach. He pulled my body against his and carried me with him as he crumpled to the floor. I wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing his cheeks, his lips, his neck, his ear, his collarbone. It helped having me aroused, I said quietly. It helped your control. He nodded, looking me in the eye. The pain and fear in his eyes broke my heart. ***** We got up and I took his hand, leading him to the shower. Our only action once in the stall was to come together and embrace as the water ran around and between us. After several long minutes he turned off the nozzle and grabbed a towel for me and then one for himself. We dressed in silence as I struggled to find the right words and he struggled with something so much larger. When his eyes finally met mine, I smiled at him, trying to reassure him thatwhat? That everything would be ok? That I knew what he was feeling? I had no idea. He stared at my forehead, his eyes hard with worry. Alice was waiting for us on the beach, her nervous energy palpable. Why didnt you wait ten minutes for Carlisle you stubborn bastard? You knew he was close. She smacked him hard, but I could see relief on her face. You know why, Alice, he grumbled. Grumpy Edward was rearing his head. He met Alices eyes, and he growled to me, Get on the boat, Bella. Excuse me? I asked, shocked at his tone. Just get on the boat. His voice was sharp. I didnt understand but saw Alice avoiding his gaze, clearly hiding something from him. I shot him a dirty look, resolving to take him to task later for bossing me around. I walked up onto the main deck and sat in a chaise next to Emmett and Rosalie. Whats up, Crash? Rosalie said with a smile. Emmett chuckled. Hey Bella? Emmett asked sweetly, Thanks for bringing Surly Edward out to play. Hes awesome. He shot me a dirty look. Sorry, I mumbled. If one of you cold fuckers would actually bite me I might become a little bit

graceful. Emmetts laugh was loud and happy. Check out the mouth on her! He looked over at Rosalie and she nodded appreciatively. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jasper walk into the main cabin. I felt a tug of sadness that it would be harder for him to be around me today. Emmett looked at me, noticing my mood. Have you seen the cabin out on the other end of the island? I shook my head. Lets go! He stood up and threw me over his shoulder as he yelled, Its my turn with Bella! I squealed, laughing. He whispered in my ear, Lets get away from the grouch. ***** Emmett was fast. And huge. I felt like I was being carried by an 18-wheeler zig-zagging through the trees. Are you trying to terrify me, Emmett? He just laughed and ran faster as I held on for dear life, my arms wrapped around his thick neck, my legs clinging to his waist. He came to stop in a lightly wooded area. The landscape was distinctly different from the island oasis backdrop around the main house. Trees surrounded a small wood cabin providing dappled shade that protected the entire building from the bright island sun. The beach was just beyond the thick of trees, the sound of the ocean was muted but still audible. Emmett smiled at me. I like this cabin much better. Come on, check it out. He grabbed my hand and pulled me up the three steps onto the wide porch and opened the front door. It was somewhat dusty, and there were spider webs in many of the corners, but the entire structure was beautiful. It was a single story, high wood-arched ceilings in a large open space, with five doors coming out of the simple main room. One led to a kitchen. It had no appliances but was a large, open area with windows along three walls, giving a beautiful view of the small forested area outside. The other doors opened to small empty rooms, presumably bedrooms. There was no bathroom. I guess the structure was built before inside plumbing was available and assumed Carlisle saw no need to change anything. Emmett was looking around the house, grinning. I love this space. I love how rustic it feels. It just feels like Im really away from everything here. Dont get me wrong; the other house is beautiful and Esme has done a beautiful job with it, but its so modern. So bright. I like the darker wood, the shaded spaces. I like feeling like a caveman in here. He turned to smile at me and grunted, beating his massive chest playfully. Im begging her to keep it darker when she redecorates. I think Ive won her over. My eyes followed him as he moved around the house, loving seeing him take it all in. His enthusiasm for everything was so inspiring, so adorable. He turned to me and took my hand again. You havent seen my favorite part, though. He led me out a door at the back of the main room and brought us out to a massive stone fire pit surrounded by a circle of with carved wood stumps; a place for relaxing at night under the stars.

The trees around the area were cut in a circle around the fire pit, leaving an open view of the sky above. Why havent we spent time here yet? I asked, bewildered. The setting was beyond beautiful. You cant really go wrong anywhere on this island, he chuckled. The other house, the beach, the boat he trailed off. I nodded, agreeing. There was plenty to do here even without this space. Plus, Esme likes the spaces to be finished before we spend time there. Its just a thing she has. I smiled at him, understanding that he actually preferred them unfinished. Despite my desert-preferring tendency, here I actually shared Emmetts love for the small shaded area, loved the damp ground, the lush groundcover all around us. This island was a complete paradise. I walked over to a patch of soft green moss and sat down, leaning against a fallen tree. Emmett came over and joined me. We watched some birds above us, quiet in our thoughts. Its easy to talk to you, he said, smiling openly at me. Its also easy to be quiet with you. Youre good for all of us, Bell. I smiled at the nickname, finding it somehow fitting from Emmett. Ive really loved having time with each of you. I smiled back at him, feeling my heart surge at this time alone with Emmett. Saving the best for last? he laughed, pointing at his chest. I shrugged, You mean Carlisle? You havent spent time one on one with Carlisle? I shook my head. He rolled his eyes. Whatever. Hes nothing special. We both laughed at this. We sat quietly for several long minutes, listening to the cacophony of nature around us: birds, insects, and the ocean. Are you scared about anything? he asked suddenly, looking at me with his open, honest eyes. Tell me, and Ill do anything to help. Im scared of what this is doing to Edward. I wish hed just get it over with already. I cant handle the tension anymore. No kidding, Emmett laughed. If it was me Id have changed you day one, hour one, minute one. He smiled a naughty smile then broke into loud laughter. I dont know how he hasnt broken you. I would have snapped your little ass like a twig. I blushed and hit his arm lightly, not wanting to hurt my knuckles. Please, Emmett, lets talk about that lots more. Its so appropriate. He laughed beside me, holding his hands up in surrender. Okay, okay. Note to self, no joking about breaking the human sister-in-law. He picked up a rock and threw it at a nearby tree, the impact creating a loud thud. The rock lodged into the tree. Awesome. He smiled, looking at me, expecting me to be impressed. I loved how much he seemed to love his life.

You really like what you are. I didnt know how to better phrase it but was pretty sure Emmett would know what I meant. He seemed to always assume the best of intentions were behind any statement. He looked at me for a long moment, grinning. Youre something else. He turned back to look at his tree and nodded. Yes, I do. I love my life. I think we have the best of both worldsonce were able to control our thirst, that is. He looked at me again, and squinted slightly, trying to get a read on me. I never got the angst thing. I mean, Jasper yes. I get that its just really really hard for him. Its been hard for all of us, and Jazz is just newest to it. But once you figure it out He shrugged happily, Weve got a really good life. We get to see the world changing before our eyes, we have this amazing family, we never have to want for anything. I just dont understand the need to punish ourselves. I smiled at him, feeling relief flooding me as I realized that I would have this person to turn to for perspective. He continued, Look, Im not trying to downplay some of the terrible things weve all done. I know Edward feels tortured about having ever taken a human life, and I know sometimes his thirst for you makes him feel like a monster. I get that. But everyone fucks up, right? I laughed at his words, and he shook his head, smiling at his gross over-simplification. Okay, I see what youre thinking. I get that killing a human is a bit different than yelling at your Mom or even robbing a bank. But only because its farther along the spectrum of fuck-ups, not because you shouldnt choose to just make yourself better and forgive yourself for all of the above. I looked at him again, nodding, appreciating his words but really having nothing to add. Thats one reason Im glad I dont have any superpower, like mind-reading, or emotion-sharing, or future-seeingI just think it makes you way more sensitive and angsty. You cant ever just let go. I laughed at this quintessential Emmett statement. Always perfectly happy with the grass on his side. You should write a book of quotations, Emmett, I said and he laughed. The Vampire World According To Emmett. The Tao of Bloodlust, he joked. The Joy of Vampirism, I laughed and he cocked an eyebrow at me. His expression turned mischievious. Im not sure I should tell you this, Bell, but weve all been making bets on what your superpower will be. I stared at him, skeptical. Will be? Oh, for sure. Youre way too special a human to not have something carryover as a vampire. His words were so honestly sweet, I leaned over and kissed his cheek. He rubbed it and pretended to put it in his pocket. So, what did everyone bet it would be? I asked, smiling. Nope, that I am not telling.

Oh come on, Emmett, thats just evil. Heres a carrot Bella, oh, nope, not for you. I scowled at him and he crumbled like a house of cards in a slight breeze. Okay, but you cant tell anyone I told youexcept Edward who will know as soon as he sees me. And ok, also Alice who probably knows Im telling you this right now. But everyone else, nothing. Got me? I nodded, stifling a smile. Esme and Jasper actually thought the same thing; they think your power will be some type of calming influence on people. I smiled at that, feeling more flattered than I could express. And Rosalie thinks, he started laughing at this, that it will be telekinesis, and her reason is that things are always mysteriously flying under your feet tripping you. He did little air quotes around mysteriously and I winced. I thought it might be levitation for the same reason, you know, as a vampire youll actually be able to miss everything in your way. He was laughing hard now. Ouch. That stings, Emmett, I said, laughing next to him, playfully smacking his arm. Okay, and Carlisle thinks actually this one is pretty good that you have some emotional healing power. He stopped and looked at me. I felt my mouth hanging open. This family saw me so differently than I saw myself it made my heart ache. And Edward? Emmett laughed, Oh yeah, him. Edward thinks you may have some kind of shield that can protect you and maybe even others from things, like Aros and Edwards mind-reading, Janes pain thingbut that one Im not sure about because Alice and Jasper can get in there, so weve argued back and forth about that one he trailed off and I stared at him. And what does Alice think? I asked, quietly. She would actually know. That is, if Edward had actually decided to change me. He smiled, The little pixie isnt telling. Arrrgg! I growled. Emmett sat next to me, chuckling. Tell me about it. Were all dying to know. He looked over at me, suddenly serious. Bell, you have to promise me something, okay? Whats that, Emmett? Promise me, because youre choosing this life, that youll find the good in it. That youll find something you love other than me, of course, his fingers pulled confidently at his shirt, and live for it. That youll make the most out of what you can be. That youll finally see yourself for who and what you are. okay? I felt tears stinging my eyes at all his hopes for me, his expectations that I could be this person overwhelmed me. Emmett, I dont know how Ill feel afterit all just feels like a very big unknown. I can promise to try. I sighed, looking at him. It makes me feel worlds better to know youll be

there. I will be there for you. I will take care of you. We all will. His eyes were earnest, and I wanted to wrap my arms around his frame. He looked up thoughtfully at the trees, thinking for a long moment. I waited to hear what he wanted to say, understanding the depth Emmett possessed. Bella, have you ever been shit on by a bird? I looked at him, laughing. No. And I guess its surprising given my propensity for disaster. He laughed next to me. I havent either, he looked at me and pointed to his chest, mouthing, reflexes, by way of explanation, then looked back up at the trees. But Ive seen it happen, and I just have to think that would be one of the most disgusting things that could happen to a human. To think that you could be walking back from, like, the library, or your girlfriends house, or be sitting at a picnic with your kids and its a beautiful day and the birds are singing and oh-isnt-this-lovely-kids? And then shit actually falls on you from the sky. He shuddered next to me, a deliberate human movement. I couldnt contain my laughter and leaned against him. Thatsreally deep, Emmett. ***** Emmett brought me back to the boat where everyone had gathered on the deck, talking about plans for the next few days. I sat next to Esme, across the deck from Edward. He caught my eye and mouthed Sorry. I smiled back, mouthing, Thank you, and pointing at my forehead. He bowed his head slightly, smiling sweetly at me. Esme hugged me next to her, saying, Weve decided to leave tonight. Well leave you two here for the rest of your honeymoon then meet you back in Forks. I looked up at Edward; he was avoiding my gaze. Oh, I said quietly, not knowing if I was happy or a little sad that the family was leaving. I also realized that with Carlisle leaving the island, the chances of Edward changing me here were slim to none. Jasper came and sat next to me, and I felt a wave of cheerfulness spread over me. I looked at him gratefully. He took my hand and squeezed it. I felt my heart burst with adoration for our newfound, quiet connection. What time are you leaving? I asked. Whenever you like, sweetheart, Esme said softly. Id love to make you dinner. I bought some gorgeous lobster in Rio this morning. I smiled and nodded my thanks to her. I had an idea for an after-dinner activity and looked at Emmett. What do you guys think of having a fire outside together before you go? Down at the fire pit after I

eat dinner? I saw Emmett grinning ear-to-ear, nodding vigorously. I think that sounds like a great idea, Bella, Carlisle said warmly. Great! I clapped my hands, a very Alice gesture, and everyone chuckled. Im going to go grab some lunch quick I stood up, laughing at myself. I was beyond happy. Edward followed me off the boat. ***** I heated some leftovers for lunch as Edward sat in the living room, strumming a guitar. I sat on the floor near him, putting my plate on the coffee table and pushing a forkful of pasta into my mouth. I swallowed. Do you miss your piano? Very much, he said, watching my mouth as I chewed. I suddenly felt like my chewing must be unbelievably loud to him and tried to swallow my next bite quietly, failing miserably. It must sound disgusting when I eat, I said, embarrassed. Why would you say that? he asked, his face alight with confusion. Your mouth is beautiful. He sighed, appearing to rearrange his position in his shorts. I smiled and he growled, You really have no idea how sensual you are, you silly girl. I smiled and let myself relax, taking another bite. I saw Edward shaking his head next to me, laughing quietly. We sat together, not speaking for a while. Edward played various songs on the guitar quietly as I ate. Are you ok? he asked, looking up at me. I realized his eyes were tense as they traveled down to my thighs. I was sitting cross-legged on the floor and had taken off my shorts when I came in the house, so was sitting only in a bathing suit. I could see hand-shaped bruises all along the inside of my thighs where Edwards hands had grabbed me this morning after stitching me up. I nodded. Im really okay. I think they look worse than they feel. I forgot about them, I said honestly, attempting a reassuring expression. He looked up the neck of the guitar, tuning it slowly. It wont be an issue forever, Edward. And this morning you seemed to need to be brought back tous. He looked up at me and nodded slightly. His fingers began moving over the strings of the guitar, the opening chords of Just Like Heaven flowing gently into the room. I watched him, my heart rate picking up at the familiar, beautiful song. His version was slow, obviously acoustic. Every sound had stopped around me as his hands moved beautifully over the guitar strings. He began to sing, his eyes meeting mine every few moments. His voice was unearthly beautiful; I froze, watching him. Show me, Show me, Show me

How you do that trick The one that makes me scream, She said The one that makes me laugh, She said And threw her arms around my neck Show me how you do it And I promise you I promise that I'll run away with you I'll run away with you Spinning on that dizzy edge I kissed her face and kissed her head And dreamed of all the different ways I had To make her glow Why are you so far away? She said Why won't you ever know that I'm in love with you? That I'm in love with you? You, Soft and only You, Lost and lonely You, Strange as angels Dancing in the deepest ocean Twisting in the water You're just like a dream... You're just like a dream... Daylight licked me into shape I must have been asleep for days And moved the lips to breathe her name

I opened up my eyes And found myself alone, alone, alone Above a raging sea That stole the only girl I loved And drowned her deep inside of me You, Soft and only You, Lost and lonely You, Just like heaven He put the guitar down and held his arms out to me. I climbed into his lap, kissing his mouth with all of the love, hunger, reassurance, and need I could muster. He clung to me and gazed at me with such naked raw love. I felt tears falling down my cheeks. Soon, he whispered against my lips. I promise you. ***** Esme cooked me the most unbelievable dinner, insisting on making appetizers, a main course, and a chocolate cake with strawberries. And winemy glass seemed to be constantly filled throughout the meal. The entire family joined me at the table, cracking jokes, telling stories. There was enough food to feed all of us and then some, but of course I was the only one eating. I felt several sets of male eyes on my mouth as I ate the strawberries off the cake before I noticed Edward shooting his brothers scolding looks. Jasper and Emmett left before us to build the bonfire. After dinner the rest of the family cleaned up the kitchen in seconds, and whisked me down the beach to the fire pit, where a large fire was roaring into the otherwise dark night sky. Edward sat on my left and Carlisle on my right. Jasper sat across from me, next to Alice. Everyone else was on the side of me around the circle. Carlisle stood and kneeled down in front of me. He looked at me silently, a warm expression in his eyes. May I? he asked, indicating my bandage. Of course, I said, leaning forward. I didnt know why he was doing this with everyone here, but no one seemed to mind too much, although I sensed no one was breathing. It almost seemed like he was making a point. I felt Edward look away. He lifted my gauze bandage and looked at Edwards handiwork. He smiled. He did an amazing job. It will heal very well. It must have been very hard for you, Edward. He pressed the bandage back in place and sat down next to me. Everyone was quiet for a few moments but it seemed that we all knew that Carlisle had something

to say. Bella. Youre our family now. I hope you feel that. I looked at him, nodding, unable to speak, unable to even say Thank You or Of course I do, or even All my friends want to sleep with my father-in-law. Nothing. I just stared at him, knowing something important was coming. His voice was quiet but strong, I spoke with Sam and Jacob before we came here. I sat up, startled. You what? He didnt repeat himself; he just took my hand softly and let me absorb the meaning of his words. Aboutme? And Edwardchanging me? I asked quietly. He nodded. And? I asked, terrified that he was going to tell me that we could never return to Forks. To their home. Because of me. And then it hit me that they were returning to Forks without us to pack. To prepare to move. He squeezed my hand and I felt a wave of calm. I looked up at Jasper; he winked at me. Carlisle continued, And I explained the Volturi issue, and suggested perhaps none of us would want the ancient Italian vampire mafia descending upon our small town. He had a small smile playing on his lips. I started to relax. Carlisle would not be teasing if everything had turned out horribly. Right? So, theyunderstand? I asked in a shaky voice that betrayed my anxiety. This matters very much to you, our ability to return to Forks, he said quietly, his eyes searching mine. Yes, they understand. It was about twenty hours of sometimes heated discussion, but they understand. They have agreed to make an exception. But Bella, even if they hadntit would not be a question what we would do. You are Edwards wife, you are our priority. He looked up at Edward who was staring at me intently, his eyes determined. Carlisle squeezed my hand so that I turned back to him. I wanted you to know, also, that Jacob played a key role in these negotiations. I thought it would be important to you to know that he supportedyouall of us, and helped convince Sam. My mind reeled as I processed what hed said. Everyone was watching me; apparently I was the only one hearing this for the first time. I felt like there was some heavy implication in the conversation but was so exhausted from constantly trying to anticipate what was going to happen. Im really happy to hear that, Carlisle. Thank you for doing that for...for Edward and me. It was all I could manage. Edward put his hand on my thigh. It was silent, except for the cracking of the fire, the insect noises around us, and the quiet crashing of waves on the beach in the distance. Suddenly Emmetts voice rose out of the darkness. Edward, did you ever tell Bella about that time we had to leave Buffalo because of Miss Marshall? He started laughing, hard.

Edward groaned next to me, as his siblings and parents joined Emmett in laughter. No, I havent. Whats the story, sweetie? I asked slyly. Edward looked at me out of the corner of his eye and then turned a scowl to Emmett. Nothing. She wasa bit taken with me I guess. Emmett laughed loudly, You could say that again. Rosalie chimed in, Yeah, she pinned you to your locker and shoved her tongue down your throat. And then, what, snuck into the locker room and tried to grope you? What? I asked, shocked. I assumed, of course, that they never told any authorities, wouldnt want the attention. Edward was laughing now. She tasted like stale coffee and biscotti. It was disgusting. He looked at me, smiling crookedly. Granted, Im picky about what tastes good to me. I blushed. Everyone groaned and ignored us. Emmett wouldnt let it go. Bell, it happened about four times over the years. We have had to leave more places because teachers would jump Edward than for any other reason. I looked at him, shocked that Id never known this. I heard Esme giggling next to Carlisle. I dont know what it is, but there is something about a well-behaved, good-looking young man that made the teachers wild I was shocked and disgusted, trying to imagine any of our teachers kissing either one of us. Ugh, Edward, you poor thing. I cant imagine what it would be like to- He cut me off, No teacher will ever come near you. His voice was hard. Jasper chuckled across the fire pit towards us. Down boy, he murmured. Edward smiled, looking away somewhat sheepishly. He then looked up sharply at Emmett, Emmett, did you tell Bella about Mr. Neilson? His smile was evil. Emmett groaned and everyone burst out laughing. What? I asked, needing to be brought into the loop. Whats the story there? Same as Edwards story, Emmett grumbled, looking into the woods. I burst out laughing and Rosalie said, That one really surprised me. He was hot. I thought for sure he was after some girls in the class. Emmett took Rosalies hand in mock sympathy. Rosie, that was probably the only man in that entire school that was not completely obsessed with you.

She smiled sweetly at him, leaning over to kiss him. I looked around the fire at my family. You miss us already, dont you, Bella? Alice asked across the flames. I do! I said, putting my hands over my face. Dont worry, kiddo. Edward will show you the time of your life as long as youre here. Emmett smiled at me. I know. I turned and looked at Edward. His eyes were dark and hungry and my heartbeat picked up. It only gets better and better. He stood, sensing my reaction. His voice was quiet and intense. Okay thats my cue. Im taking my bride back to the house. Time for goodbyes. Everyone came and hugged me goodbye, telling me to have fun, be good, that they would see me in a few days. Emmett pulled me to him and I cried out in the pain of his crushing hug. Edward pulled him back, angry. Emmetts face was contrite. Some silent exchange occurred and Edwards face was tighter than normal. I know, Edward said, a low growl. Shes tiny. Emmett held out his fist silently as Edward bumped it with his own. The gesture was reassuring and brotherly. Edward pulled me up on his back as they all ran silently back towards the beach house. Edward and I waved from the door as they all walked towards the boat. He turned to me, closing the door against his back, leaning against it and staring at me. Are you ready to be ravaged, my little kitten? he asked with a crooked smile on his face. He raised an eyebrow teasingly and licked his lips. He pulled his shirt over his head and threw it to the floor. Bella? *****

Chapter 17: Mine, Forever Are you ready to be ravaged, my little kitten? he asked with a crooked smile on his face. He raised an eyebrow teasingly and licked his lips. He pulled his shirt over his head and threw it to the floor. Bella? Yes I answered quietly. Even after I answered he didnt move from where he stood at the door. I fidgeted nervously; his gaze was unswerving. I no longer felt intimidated by his presence, but his intensity was hard to read tonight. My eyes darted to his naked torso and back to his face. He smiled at me, sensing my rush of

arousal. I knew now that I couldnt hide any physiological reaction I had. Youre blushing, love, he whispered. Of course I am. I smiled at him, touching my eyebrow in a nervous gesture. Am I making you blush? You are. I smiled again, seeing him enjoy watching me squirm. How do you want me tonight? His voice was low and sultry. Naked, I whispered, watching his eyes move down my body. Do you want dirty Edward? Or do you want slow Edward? He pushed himself away from the door, but did not walk towards me. Slow, I murmured. Then, unsure: How do you want me? I asked, I couldnt explain my nerves. I was hot. Suddenly the heat was oppressive. I want you how I always want you: wet, around me, moaning in my ear. He smiled slowly and the look bordered on a snarl. I looked away briefly and then back at his intense gaze. There it is again. The blush. His eyes were playful now. My mind scrambled to figure out what kind of love he wanted to make tonight. For once I didnt know where we were going. I felt that I was missing an important sub-context to our foreplay. I nodded, touching my cheeks with my hands, feeling the hot skin beneath my fingers. Will you miss it? I didnt answer. Your blush. His clarification was quiet. He took one step towards me. Reflexively I took one step back. A wounded expression flashed across his face before understanding took its place. He stopped, his expression softening. No. My answer was firm. He cocked an eyebrow. No? His voice was soft. Its such a human thing, to blush. You wont miss it? Really, I wont. I tried to make my voice strong, but I felt lost in our wandering conversation. Its horrible for someone like me to not be able to hide their feelings, particularly embarrassment or

anxiety. He let his breath out in a low exhale as his hands fell limply to his sides. You see yourself so clearly in some ways, and not in others. You are amazing. I blinked and looked away from him for a moment, trying to figure out his mood. I looked back at him and felt the worry in my face, heard the worry in my voice. Will you miss it? I think I will be too busy worshipping you to miss anything. His answer was delivered without any hesitation. His eyes continued to burn into me. Again I registered how badly he wanted me. Forever. I felt my cheeks warm at his answer. We both laughed. I looked around the room, trying to find the invisible haze of tension settling around us. Whatwhat is going on with you tonight? I asked finally, carefully. He smiled at me, trying to relax his tense body. Ive tried to explain. Im not doing a good job explaining. I fall more in love with you every day. I feel a little crazy. He laughed, shaking his head. I cant express it well, and I am having a hard time containing it. I dont mean to be weird tonight. I just cant get overthis. He pointed to the space surrounding me. My voice was a whisper: Baby, come here. I felt relief knowing what he needed. I started walking backwards towards the bedroom, extending a hand to him. He walked towards me, enveloping me in his arms and covering my lips with his hungrily. Bella I need you too much. I whimpered against him; I could not hold him tight enough and felt his body quivering next to me with the restraint it took to not crush me. I am out of words. I barely heard him. He kissed me deeply and his tongue pushed into my mouth, his moans echoed in my throat, his hands dug into my hair, and ran over my skin. He carried me to our room, setting me down gently in front of the bed. Do you need ahuman moment? he asked quietly, swallowing. I nodded, heading into the bathroom for my nightly ritual: wash face, brush teeth, brush hair. He followed me in, watching me silently as he leaned against the doorway. I walked over to the suitcase, planning on putting on something to come to bed. Be naked with me now, Bella. His voice was low over my shoulder and my heartbeat picked up slightly at his sudden close presence behind me. I turned to him and slowly removed my clothes as he watched, mesmerized. I stood naked before him as he slipped out of his jeans and boxers. He smiled at me before leading me to the bed. Edward climbed in next to me, pulling my body onto his to kiss me deeply for several minutes as his hands roamed over my back. He rolled us over so that we were facing each other. I love you, Bella, he whispered to me.

I hummed my reply, kissing him and needing him to come into me. He pulled his face back to smile happily at me. His voice was tender and slow. I love how your voice sounds when you say my name. I love the way your fingers move when you are brushing a strand of hair from your face. He kissed my nose. I love your laugh when I make a bad joke; its sweeter and sillier than the laugh you make for my good ones. I love how your hands tremble when I play you your lullaby and how you stop breathing sometimes when you are listening to my voice. He chuckled, kissing my neck. See? Breathe, Bella. His hands moved to my face and he stroked my cheeks with his thumbs. I love how your eyes narrow at me when I tease you, so sexy and playful. I love the taste of you and the feel of your soft skin under my fingers. I love holding you while you sleep, but I love holding you when youre awake even more. I looked at him, resisting the urge to speak because I sensed there was more he wanted to say. There was. Edward quietly told me the story of how he fell in love with me, things I knew but we never talked about anymore. How he thought he hated me the first day he saw me, because he felt like a monster; hed felt as though he had a safe life, a life he could predict and understand, and when I came into his world he had no control. He told me how he watched me, observed my quiet mannerisms, and my clumsy demeanor. He described how he was completely stupefied to find himself falling in love with me, he was scared, self-loathing, exhilarated, awkward, and lovesick. He told me how I surprised him at every turn, how I was fearless when he expected me to be terrified, how I was strong when he expected me to collapse, how I was sassy when he expected me to be intimidated, how I was forgiving when he expected me to be ruthless. His laugh was gorgeous next to my skin. He told me how he felt to be near me, how it made his throat burn, his body ache, his mind clouded. He told me how he struggled to be with me, to love me without hating himself. He told me how my lips felt against him the first time we kissed. He told me how much it tortured him to stop when I kissed him back because my arousal pushed into him like a fog and he wanted to simply lose himself in the feel of me. He described how I felt underneath him the first time we made love. He told me how he knew my body better than I did, how he read my body better than he read anyones mind. Edward was silent for a minute, and then told me how sorry he was that he had left me. I tried to stop him here but he pressed his lips to mine to silence me. He told me he would work every day to earn my forgiveness. He told me how sorry he was that he couldnt give me a family. Then, his voice softened and he told me about his day, that he was proud of himself for being able to stitch me up, that he was sorry he snapped at me in the morning, but he had had a good talk with Alice. He told me that he loved seeing me with his family, that his family adored me, that he wanted me to see our future with them. He told me everything. I was mute; I was stunned into silence. He watched my face as he grazed my jaw with his lips.

What is this about? I couldnt stop the tears from spilling onto my cheeks and pushed them away, wanting to clear my vision. He smiled at me, chuckling. I tell you those things well, some variation at least - every night while you sleep. I pulled back from his face, blinking. While I sleep? Every night? He nodded, his expression shy. I figured I should say it to you when youre awake sometime. I figured that you might want to hear it. I climbed on top of him, kissing him with abandon and pressing my hips into his. Grabbing his hair in my hands, I whimpered against him, needing him. He hesitated for a moment before tangling his fingers in my hair and arching his body to mine. He moved beneath me; hips pushing up against my ass, his moans loud in my mouth. We were a tangle of limbs, hot and cold. Hard and delicate. I moved down his body, pulling his legs around my ribs as I drew him into my mouth, tasting him, taking him as deep as I could. His hands never left my skin until he was close, and when he began to shake beneath me, when his words of encouragement turned into pleas for more, he reached behind him to grab a pillow. He groaned, pushing his hips against me, moving in my mouth, faster, his words coming out in jumble, his legs shaking harder now. He grunted hard and low as he came into me as he ripped the pillow underneath him. He pulled me up to him and flipped me onto my back, staring at me intently. Bella he whispered. So good he moved his hips against me, rocking slowly. He waited a long moment, seeming to be in silent communication with my body before pushed into me slowly. There it is. There is my look, he moaned. I keep that look in my mind all day long. Before I registered that I wanted him to move faster, it would seem that he would move faster. Harder. Slower. Deeper. His eyes never left mine. I grunted out my breaths with his thrusts, and he watched my mouth try to form words. I pulled his head down to my lips, telling him, Baby, Im close. I know. He smiled. Instead of increasing his tempo, he slowed down, kissing me softly. Do you love me, Bella? My words from the other night came back to me; I recalled my need to hear him say these things. I moaned against him, understanding the need to reassure he must have felt at the time. I love you. I love you more than anything in this world," I moaned, feeling my body careening on the edge or orgasm as his movements brought me so close and kept me there. I squeezed him with my inner muscles and tried to pull him deeper with my legs around his waist. He gasped and drew a long path along my neck with his tongue, setting my skin on fire. Cool puffs of air landed on my skin as he whispered, "Tell me you need me. Tell me how much..."

"I need you Edward. I need you so much. I can't exist without you. You are my world..." "Forever, Bella. He thrust into me, pressing his hands to the side of my face while his lips moved on my neck. "Tell me you're mine forever. Tell me you belong to me." His voice was so low, and his breath was uncharacteristically fast as he sucked up the air around me, gulping down the smell of my skin. My body was aching, clutching him. Realization pushed at the edge of my mind as I whispered, desperate for release, "I am yours forever, Edward. He looked at my chest, at the familiar flush of my climax creeping over my skin, at the tell-tale hitching of my breath in my throat. He smiled at me as my body twisted below him. He brought his hand to my pussy, rubbing along the space where we came together. His fingers touched his lips briefly and then dragged against my neck, drenching my skin with my scent. And then he closed his eyes and leaned back. Edward closed his eyes while he was making love to me. At that moment, I understood. I understood that the family was never in Peru. I knew that they came here only for us. I realized that he wanted me to be as sure about them as I was about him. I knew that Carlisle was here, in this house. I knew that my husband had listened to me, and had meticulously planned to change me like this. And in the same instant my orgasm came crashing down over me, arching my back up against my husbands cold body, Edwards fist crashed through the headboard, pulverizing the wall behind the bed. I cried his name and screamed my love for him as he bent to my neck. ***** EPOV I entered Bella, watching her eyes turn hooded and dizzy with need. I relished the small smile that played on her lips when she felt me slipping inside her. The smile that communicated, This. This is what we were meant to do. Her heartbeat slowed, and then picked up. Slowed and picked up. I listened to the sounds I had memorized so meticulously, saying goodbye to them, needing to rely only on her movements and soft groans from now on. Her expression drove me to distraction. I lived for the look she made when she felt me inside of her.

I would never lose that. I listened to her body, not her heart. I wanted to make sure I knew her body and its movements better than she did, make sure that her heartbeat didnt matter, that I could play her body like ivory without sound. And I did. I smiled when she told me she was close, her unnecessary prompt was warm and husky in my ear, driving my own body to the edge of release. But I would not let go again tonight. Her breath smelled of me. I needed it to. I let myself listen to her heartbeat again, to see the pulse in her throat. A flush crept over her chest. I said goodbye. I let my thirst come into my head; kept it on a barbed wire leash. I inhaled deeply, whispering my love to her quietly. Her body tensed and she stared at my face as she began her journey towards climax. But I slowed in her, needing to hear her voice, needing the words to take root in my head, to echo and pull me back when I needed them. I put my hand against her warm pussy, her skin was slippery with her arousal. I needed the smell of her to bring me back from her blood. I dragged my wet hand along her neck, hearing her begin to whimper in earnest as I began moving faster, urging her to come. The scent of her blood and arousal, of my semen on her lips, together with the feeling of my thirst finally given access to her throat, was overwhelming. I closed my eyes to slow my need and bent to her neck, pressing my lips against her pulse. I wanted to scream. I wanted to change my mind. But I wanted her forever. I slammed my fist into the headboard. She knew. She screamed out my name. She cried that she loved me. I sunk my teeth in her soft flesh and her blood rushed too fast into my mouth as she gasped beneath me. I pulled back before I let any into my throat, kissing her mouth almost brutally, unable to quell my fear and my longing. Her own blood coated her lips as I cried my love for her in a dry wracking sob. I screamed for the pain she was about to endure. With her small hands, she pulled my head to her, her breath hot against my ear. One whispered word: Go. GO! my mind screamed. I bent and drank.

Hot. Earth. Wet. I heard her whisper my name. I licked the wound closed but bit her again before I could plan the movement, now feeling the bloodlust moving up my legs causing them to push into the bed and pin her down, moving up my chest causing it to crush her beneath me, moving up my arms causing them to vise her head still, moving to my hands causing them to strangle her. My mouth opened, letting Bella into my throat. The sound of her heart. The blood rushing into my mouth. And all I could feel was the need to drain Bella. ***** I was killing her. Again. And then: Our meadow. Bellas laugh. Bella buried in a parka standing by her truck. Bellas hand in a nervous gesture on her ear. Bella falling and my arms reaching out to catch her. Bellas soft mouth on mine, moaning my name. Bellas looking over her shoulder at me, her eyes pushing me to lose control. And in that moment, I felt how hard I was, still inside of her, and needing her more than I needing anything. I heard her soft whimpers, the smell of my semen on her breath and the smell of her desire for me beneath my lips on her skin. I felt her body writhing beneath mine. I opened my eyes. Bellas hair in my face. Bellas skin under my grip. Bellas blood on my lips, on her lips. I licked the wound closed. I moaned as I bit each tiny wrist, closing the cuts quickly and willing the venom to work. My throat burned, my body convulsed against the withdrawal. I closed my throat, swallowing continuously, moving with purpose. I knew my father and brother had been at the door within seconds of my smashing the headboard, our signal. I looked at Bellas tiny body beneath me, silent, her face tight in agony. Carlisle, I whispered. He burst into the room, moving to Bella in a blur, feeling her pulse, checking her cuts. He bit where I bit her wrists and licked her wounds softly, pushing his own venom into her arms. His own nervous energy demanded some additional contribution. He looked up at me, moving quickly to tend now to his first son, to yank me into his arms as I let out the sobs I had been holding inside all day knowing tonight was coming; even after Alice had told me it would be okay I couldnt act sane, couldnt be normal around my wife. I had been completely shaken by this morning, completely unprepared for her blood flowing freely in front of me today of all days, when I needed to be strong. I sobbed into Carlisles neck. I didnt care that I was naked. I didnt care that Emmett was moving into the room, covering Bellas body with a blanket and washing the blood from her neck with a wet rag. I didnt care that I was hysterical in my fathers arms.

I needed to calm down but my calm was unconscious on the bed, in pain. Carlisle held me tight, and then gently released me. He watched us silently as I climbed into bed beside Bella, pulling her shivering body to mine. She was silent and her face was stone. I didnt have the sense to remember anything, to know whether she should be screaming yet, and whether she should feel pain immediately. Carlisle stared at her, his expression unreadable. Its all going as it should. He reassured me, his face relaxing. Better, actually. She is quiet. I worked to not sob against her in relief, to not lose my mind over having not killed her. I resisted burying myself in her neck and crying dry sobs of joy. I pushed every thought I had towards reducing her pain. Towards getting her through the next few days. I whispered to her about every memory I had of her and everything we had yet to do. I held her while she silently burned, having given her the last human experience I could manage: her sexy vampire clich. I buried my face against her neck and waited for my wife, my life, my everything to come back to me. *****

~The End~
Read The Sequel: A Life Extraordinary

Let Your Light Shine FGB Outtake

Pillow Talk
Timing of out-take: This takes place during the night in chapter 15 LYLS (after toy play, before Bella wakes up and slips in kitchen). Bella is still human. ~*~ Edward POV Her hair fell around us, a curtain of dark blocking out the light from the tea lights. I watched her hand, still moving over me, elbow cocked to the side. She looked so determined, wanting to make me come again even though what we had just done together required some quiet time to process. And then something inside me melted. I had never felt anything like it before, nothing so intense even on our wedding day when she walked to me. Even the first time I saw her. This was warm; a

longing that twisted me up in the most delicious way. It was an ache that pulled me closer to her, the feeling of wanting to twist around her and just... squeeze. Her eyes were wide and honest and there was so much love and want there. "Bella, I'm... I need... " I mumbled, unable to find words for what I needed. I needed her. I needed more of her, all of her. ~O~ For a while we simply kissed, touching and tasting. I loved the way her lips felt on my tongue, the way her tongue felt against my lips. I was acutely aware of every point of contact between us. She pulled me on top of her and wrapped her legs around mine. Her calves felt like a band of heat around me, and for several minutes all I could feel was this stretch of warmth around my skin. I reached down and touched her leg, pulling it higher to my hip. Kisses would start tentative, maybe playful, and then grow into deep, ravenous, arching hunger before returning back to slow and tasting. "I love the way we kiss," she whispered, the words coming out pressed against my lips. I hummed. I pulled back and then licked her jaw. "When you say that, what do you mean?" She shrugged and smiled a little shyly. "We kiss the same." I nodded, smiling. "It's probably because we learned together." She dropped her gaze to my chest above her. "True." I didn't want to sound like I didn't feel the same way. In fact, if anything I understood her meaning precisely. It was almost as if we read each other's mind when we touched. She gave me everything I wanted before I had to ask. So I added quietly, "But I know exactly what you mean." My agreement seemed to make her bolder and she ran her fingers into my hair, pulling back to look at me. "It feels like when we kiss, we want the same thing at the same time. Slow or fast. You know?" I nodded, smiling. "I do." "It's never been awkward." I laughed a little, kissing along her neck. "It was awkward once." "When?" she asked, looking confused. "Our wedding kiss. I was a little awkward." I remembered finishing our vows, hearing Reverend Webber pronounce us husband and wife, feeling my love and lust intersect in a sharp spike in my chest. I'd barely contained a possessive growl and had had to concentrate entirely on kissing Bella not only gently, but chastely. "You weren't awkward. You were just restrained." This made me laugh again and I nodded, bending to press my lips to hers. "Very. I wasn't used to kissing you in front of a crowd. I wanted" I closed my eyes, shaking my head slightly. I'd wanted to pull her gown from her body and feel her right then, as soon as she was my wife. "It doesn't matter. It was perfect." "What were you going to say?" she asked, smiling nervously. I shook my head, kissing her again. "Some variation of how much I wanted you." I rolled my eyes at myself playfully and she laughed. Her lips moved up my chin and my eyes drifted closed as I let myself feel her breath, her teeth

grazing my skin. She spoke, exhaling warm air against my neck. "Do you think it will change?" Her voice vibrated against my throat and I felt it, inside me. It was distracting enough that I couldn't rewind through our conversation. "Do I think what will change?" "How we kiss." "When?" She looked at me, arching an eyebrow and my chest twisted as I wanted to find a way to tell her how much I loved her face. Suddenly, I understood. "When I change you?" Her eyes softened and grew hungry, dropping to stare at my mouth, at the sharp teeth behind my parted lips. Was that the first time I had acknowledged her impending change so plainly? Could she tell from my face that I wanted it soon? We both knew I would do it, but she still thought it would happen at home, in the basement. She whispered, "Yeah." I licked my lips, feeling caught in her stare. "Why would it change?" "I mean, will it be different when I don't have to breathe anymore?" I smiled. "I don't know. I've never kissed anyone who doesn't have to breathe." She laughed and rolled her eyes. "I just hope it doesn't feel like you're kissing a rock." I gaped at her, feeling a strange mixture of horror and amusement. "Do you feel like you're kissing a rock when you kiss me?" "No," she laughed. "Then why would I once you're changed?" I wondered if I was being dense because I could focus on very little other than how often she licked her lips. "Because I'm all soft now, and I'll be harder then." My cock twitched against her leg at the idea of really kissing her, of sucking as hard as I want on her skin, at being able to let go and make love to her with complete abandon. "I'm sure you'll feel perfect." "Will my mouth taste good?" She paused, chewing her lip. "Maybe better?" she laughed, blushing. "You taste so good." "So do you. And I'm sure you'll taste wonderful after, as well," I murmured, sucking gently at her jaw bone. She blushed further and I could taste the sweet hue of it just beneath her skin. I struggled to not suck harder. She hummed quietly and I wondered what she was thinking. "What is it?" "Will I still get wet?" She bit her lip and I glanced at her mouth, trying to understand what she meant. "No," she said, watching my eyes and shaking her head. "I mean wet." I nodded and shifted over her, pressing against her wetness with my length. She groaned, arching under me. "Yes." I kissed down her neck. "You will get wet faster, I imagine." "How do you know?" "I don't, really. I am just making an educated guess based on years of listening to males and females react to each other, both in my house and outside my house." I laughed. I licked my way to her

breasts and blew a stream of air across her nipples. They grew harder as the skin tightened. "I believe these will be even more responsive. Everything is more responsive." Shifting my hips back, I slid my fingers between her legs, rubbing slowly. "Though to be honest, I can't imagine you more responsive, more wet." She pressed her head back into the pillow, parted her lips to gasp and I took the opportunity to slide my tongue into her mouth, to suck a little on hers. "That okay?" I whispered, pressing a bit harder with my fingertips. She nodded but when I moved faster, excited, her hips shifted away and I felt her slight wince and adjusted the pressure. "Sorry," I breathed. "Too hard?" "I'm good." Her hands pulled at my hair, her legs tried to move up and around my hips. "I want you." "Yes." I moved closer, slid my hand to her hip and pressed myself inside. The world, which had felt unbalanced and too bright, too sharp, narrowed down to only the space where Bella touched me. I wanted to fall upon her, bury myself inside, but the acuity of my need for her made it impossible to ignore every twitch of her muscles, the fragility of her bones beneath me. The feeling gave me hope in view of my plans for the next night. Every particle in the air around me smelled of her. I felt everything she did almost a second before she moved. I was more attuned to her tonight than I had ever been. I wondered, suddenly, what I was feelingthis drowning love, as if I swam in nothing but my need for herand I froze. I couldn't believe it hadn't occurred to me before what the obsessive fascination and the intensifying longing meant. For several hours now, even when we had been only separated by a wall or an arm's length, it had been too much. I craved the feel of her skin on my hands, the taste of her breasts, the sliding of her mouth over me. I thought of nothing but the sound of her moans and her voice begging me to come. I was having my first love day. I choked, coughing out a sob. "What is it?" she asked, pulling her head back and pressing her hands to my cheeks. How could I explain it to her? "I love you," I mumbled, lamely. She smiled, letting out a quiet laugh. "I love you, too." I shook my head, kissing her forehead and rocking in her, just a little. "I mean... I just love you in a way that I can't find words to explain." She smiled, cupping my face. "I know what you mean." Oh no, my sweet girl. This is so much more. This is me wanting to possess you. This is me being insatiableliterally. This is a feeling of continually falling, of unflagging desire, of adoration so intense I truly believe nothing in the world has ever been as precious to anyone as you are to me. But instead of trying to explain any of this, I kissed her. I pressed my lips to hers, parting them when she opened her mouth hungrily and sucked on my lips. I was all at once struck with the thought that Bella would someday feel this way for me. Would she feel it with similar intensity? The thought that she might was dizzying. Suddenly, it was all I could do to not bite her immediately. Was this how it was meant to be? This moment, now, with both of us just us, together, no plan, no obsessing, no over-thinking? I ran my hand up her throat and held two fingers around her pulse point, feeling how her heart responded when I slowed down or stopped, when I started moving

again, when I whispered in her ear. I reveled in her life even as I struggled to understand if this was when I was meant to end it. "You feel so good," she whispered. "I love feeling you like this, on top of me." And just like that I knew it wouldn't be tonight. Because just as she loved the way I felt over her, and as much as I needed to feel her unbreakable beneath me, I would miss this. I wanted Bella firm and eternal, but I loved her like this, too. I wanted to make love to her human body for one more night. I wanted to feel her soft, warm, breakable and tender beneath me. I filled my head with the smell of her. I tasted her shoulder, her nipple, the skin over her ribs. "Up here," she breathed, pulling me back up to her face. "Kiss me." So I did. Over and over until she was panting and squirming beneath me, urging me to move faster. "Slow," I mumbled before stopping altogether and kissing her deeply. When I pulled back and looked at her, she was grinning. "You're stopping?" she whispered. I shook my head. "No. Just so absorbed in you I keep forgetting to move." "That's okay. I like it when you're just in me like this." Her hands ran up my back and into my hair. "Me, too." "Tell me your firsts," she said before biting my shoulder. "First what?" I slurred, drunk from her. What was she asking? "First anything." She shrugged and bit me again. It was delicious, soft pressure. I wanted to tell her to really bite, to dig in and scrape against me but had no idea whether it would hurt her or not. She tugged at my hair, saying quietly, "You choose." She was my first everything. How could I choose what to describe? A million moments flashed into my mind. I settled on the first first. "First time I smelled you?" She smiled. "Okay." I chuckled and shook my head because I knew she would want to hear that. How many times would I tell her this story? It occurred to me that I told her this every night while she slept and tonight would be the last. Emotion wracked my chest so I kept it simple to keep my voice steady. "I wanted to kill you. I think I also wanted you... sexually." "Both?" I nodded. "I was overwhelmed with it all. Lust, rage, hunger... " "Another." She inhaled deeply and pushed her breasts against my chest. "First time I saw your naked breasts?" "Yes," she whispered. Without thinking I began slowly thrusting in her again. I needed more. I needed every part of her wrapping around every part of me. "I saw you changing one night. You were going to bed late and I was early." The memory caused me to grow even more rigid inside her. "I know the night," she said, squeezing me inside. "You wore a black bra under a-"

"A red sweater," she finished, a little breathless. "I hoped you were outside. I stood by the window, far back enough that it wasn't obvious. I didn't think you were really outside but I hoped you were." "I was." I stopped, looking at her. "You were teasing me." She nodded, whispering, "What did you do?" I smiled. "I masturbated." She gasped out a laugh, breathy and tight. "That word sounds so dirty." "It was dirty," I said, laughing now, too. "I wasn't particularly gentle that night. A lesser man might have caught fire." She laughed, throwing her head back into the pillow and I sucked on her neck. Too hard, I realized, as a slight red mark bloomed on the hollow of her throat. I stared at it, fascinated. Suddenly, I imagined biting her there, imagined seeing the mark on her skin, forever. I began moving again, faster now, picturing the shape of my teeth on her skin. For once the thought was not horrifiying, but was instead surprisingly, immensely arousing. "Oh, God," I whispered. "Another," she breathed, looking up at me. I moved my hand to her hipbone, rubbing my thumb over her skin as I rocked in her. It took a minute before I could process the request. All around me her pulse was pounding. "First time I almost made love to you?" She stared at me, nodding and looking slightly surprised, as if she still didn't believe I'd thought of sex with her before we were married. "Don't you remember the meadow, Bella?" I asked quietly. "When I told you I wanted you, that I would give you anything, whether we were married or not?" "I do," she said. "I just don't think I'll ever get over hearing about those thoughts you had before we were here." "The first time I almost made love to you was the night you found the bed." She stilled, looking at my mouth. "What?" she whispered. "The bed? In my bedroom. When I called you an angry grizzly." "I know the bed. It's just not what I expected you to say." I bent and licked her bottom lip, smiling at the way she pulled the lip into her mouth, sucked on my taste and chewed on her tingling skin. "Why?" "You teased me," she said and her smile was strained, wounded almost, as she lowered her eyes. The expression caused me to literally ache. The sudden distance between us in the moment felt leaden. "I did?" She nodded. "You pulled my leg up over your hip like you wanted us to rub together there. You really touched me. Then you made me feel like I misunderstood." I closed my eyes, thinking back to the night in question. I thought about how I felt her arm, her waist, her thigh. How I had pulled her leg over my hip, grinding slowly for three of the most delicious seconds I'd known to that point. Then I remembered the spike in her lust. How the smell of her, aroused, tore open my need. How I barely held back from giving her anything she asked for that night. I remembered telling her the

idea of moving farther was ridiculous, because in that moment, I hadn't been entirely sure I would have been able to control my strength. "I am so sorry," I said, kissing her throat. "Did I embarrass you?" "Yes." "I wanted you so much." "Not obviously. I felt as if I was continually trying to seduce you." "You were," I laughed. She scowled at me and I softened my tone. "Look. I wanted you. Intensely. I've told you I had to touch myself constantly to keep from trying to touch youanywhere. But I am glad we waited. I am glad we remained virgins until you were my wife. In my opinion, it's how it is supposed to be." She sighed and then nodded. "I know. I'm glad it happened how and when it did." She reached to kiss me. "But we are married now." I smiled. "Very." "Very married?" I nodded. "I might even venture to say you are extremely married to an absurdly possessive man." She purred, licking her bottom lip. "Well, this absurdly possessive now-husband owes me a grinding session." "Do I now?" I asked, ghosting my lips over her neck. "Yeah," she breathed. Her heart began to flutter and I pressed my hand to her chest, wanting to feel the rhythm in my palm. I memorized how it sped under my touch. The sound and the beat were locked away in my memory for always. Closing my eyes, I pulled out of her, moved to the side, and smiled as I kissed her. I remembered and mimicked what I'd done on the bed that night. I slid my hand down her ribs but this time paused to cup her breast, squeeze it in my hand, then bent to suck on it, before moving my hand over her waist, then hip, and down her leg. I paused again, tickling the back of her knee, relishing how she shivered. The scent of how she wanted me coated every particle of air. "Here," I whispered, gripping her knee and sliding her leg over my hip. Shifting forward, I felt my shaft slip between her lips, exactly right. "That's it," I said. She moaned, shaking, her hips rocking already. I pulled back slightly so the ridge of my cock would rub across her clit. "Is this what you wanted that night? My cock between your legs?" "Yeah." I could feel how we fit together. I'd known it even then, known how badly I wanted her sliding against me. "It was just like this. I was lined up with your fucking perfect pussy, Bella." She started moving faster, her hands clutching at my hair. "Could you tell that I was hard?" She whimpered when I asked and I growled, "Feel how hard I am. Just like that night." I shifted back and reached between us to gently tap my cock against her, making her breath catch and trip over itself. I ran my finger over my tip and brought it to her lips. "I'm leaking everywhere, fuck... I need to feel you." She swallowed and tried to speak, but couldn't. And I couldn't seem to stop talking, moving back

against her and rocking faster now. "You gonna come on me?" "Yeah." She buried her face in my neck, panting and gasping, so hot on my skin. "Let me see," I whispered. "Let me see your face." Pulling back, she looked at me. Her eyes were barely open, lids heavy. She panted across my mouth, lips parted. "Close... " The word trailed off and she let out the smallest grunts, begging me, saying please over and over. The sound of her voice did wonderful things to me. I had the sensation of falling and spinning into her. "Fucking beautiful," I told her. "Give me your noises." "Please," she gasped as I pressed my ear to her lips. "Edward, don't stop." "Give it to me," I begged. "Give it up, give it up," I whispered over and over. She shifted her hips and cried out when I pressed harder against her. "Is that where you want it? Hard right there?" She gulped, swallowed, nodding. I held steady, firmly in the same spot, rocking in short fast movements. I was consumed, absolutely consumed with this woman. It was all I could do to not tilt my hips back, push inside her, feel her pulse around my length. "God, you're beautiful. So goddamn beautiful... fuck... " I couldn't stop staring at her, taking in each aspect of her expression: excitement, longing, anticipation, lust, and an edge of fear that I related to all too well. The fear was about not knowing if this love would explode somehow, if this would be the coupling that would drive us both mad with the realization that we could not literally climb inside the other. She started to come, her body bucking and instinctively pulling away from the intensity but I followed with my hips, keeping the rhythm as she panted and then started calling out to me. "I'm here," I said. Her cries were louder, and she screamed and then gasped and tried to pull away but I knew she could come again. I knew she was sensitive but she could take more. "Don't pull away. You're not done yet. Not even fucking close. Give me another." Her hips relaxed in my hands, her grip tightened in my hair again. "Yes... yes," I rasped, lost in her wetness all around me. Her heartbeat thundered, her pulse echoed in my chest. So close. Closer. "Oh." It was just a breath of a sound. There was so much contained in that single, quiet gasp. "That's it. Come on me." "Coming," she breathed. "I can't- I can't-" Her hips shook and I gripped her as hard as I dared. "Don't you fucking stop." "Touch me there," she gasped and I knew what she wanted. I kissed her neck before licking my fingers and sliding them to her backside, touching, pressing. With a sharp cry she came again, the pulse beneath her skin pounding all around my length. It felt like the walls rattled in the silence that followed. Everything in my head shook with need for her; it was disorienting. Each cell screamed for more; my mind begged to absorb everything she did. "Mmm," she hummed. "That's what we should have done that night." I laughed tightly, kissing her neck. "You didn't come," she whispered.

"I will." Over and over, I wanted to add. Soon we will be unable to get enough, both of us, just like how I feel tonight. "So do it," she purred, saucily. "Roll over," I growled, struggling to not nip at her skin. She obliged, rolling to her belly before glancing over her shoulder at me and smiling wickedly. "Bella, careful. That look... " I trailed off. She knew what that look did to me. It's why she was giving it. I ran my hands over the smooth expanse of her back, feeling the blood rush to the surface, meeting my hands. I felt the gooseflesh follow in its wake; the cold settling in only after the flush from my touch. "Do I do that to you?" I whispered, still marveling that my touch could ever make her skin flush hot. "What?" she breathed. "Give me goosebumps?" I hummed in response because my question had been rhetorical. I knew the thousands of reactions her skin had to my hands. I ran my hands between her legs, feeling the wetness there. My fingers circled and she arched to me, spreading her legs. "Do you like it like that?" I asked and then ran my fingers forward and back over her clit. "Or like that?" "Mmm," she hummed. "Which?" I pressed harder, both with words and my hand. I wanted to know. Circles. Forward and back. Circles. Forward and back. She giggled into the pillow and I fell impossibly more in love. "Either. Both." "Which feels better?" She paused, pushing her butt towards me for more. Circles. Forward and back. "I don't know," she whispered. "It's like asking me to choose between eating and breathing." I laughed and bent to kiss away the moisture gathering at the nape of her neck. It must have been warmer than I thought or she was really worked up. "You'll soon find you will care for neither of those things. It's choosing between pleasure and pleasure." "Fine," she said quietly, and I could hear the smile. "In that case, I choose pleasure." I skimmed my hands across her backside, pressing her smooth cheeks together, glancing a soft spanking over one side. "I want to fuck this," I whispered. She held her breath. "You can," she said on the exhale. "Not now. Ground rules, remember? I'm just fantasizing." She laughed tightly. I smelled her everywhere. "Okay," she whispered. "Did you ever think you'd want that?" She shook her head. "Never really thought about it. It probably would have seemed like something people don't really do, you know?" I nodded, kissing the middle of her back. "So why now?" She took a moment to answer and reached her arms up to hug the pillow under her head, before arching into me. "I feel so close to you." She shook her head and her hair swept over her back. I

pushed it aside and bent to kiss her shoulder. "It's overwhelming sometimes. And it's impossible to ever find the right way to show you. It's like we are constantly struggling to get just a bit closer. Deeper." She dropped her voice, "I can't ever get enough. So... that's why now." I choked on my words, feeling my eyes burn from unformed tears. "Yes," was all I could manage. She was translating my strongest, silent heartbeat. She sighed. "I want to do it all. Any way we can touch, I want to try." For this, for her ability to articulate this one fundamental truth so simply, I kissed my way down her back, sucking and licking until she shook for more. She could not possibly understand how her words filled me, settled inside, and satisfied the hunger. "Well, I want it," I said. "I want to feel every part of you. But I want to make it good for you. So for that, we will wait," I whispered, "for now." "Well, for now you can move between," she said and the skin beneath my hands flushed red, a full body blush. "Mrs. Cullen, are you blushing while you suggest I slide my cock between these perfect cheeks?" "Maybe," she giggled. "Such a dirty girl." I reached for the lube and ran some along my length before dribbling some between her cheeks. Straddling her, I whispered, "Push up, Bella." She arched into me and I settled my erection between her cheeks, sliding slowly forward and back. "Is that okay?" she asked, looking over her shoulder at me. "It's good," I groaned, watching. This position allowed me to watch myself move over her, see her soft flawless skin appear and disappear underneath my cock. All too soon I was thrusting and struggling to remain mindful of my weight over her. She arched and pushed into me, rocking her own hips up and down into the bed to join my movements. "Bella," I said, strained. "Christ I'm not... I can't... " "Do it," she whispered. It was too much, all at once it was too much and I leaned my hands on the bed beside her shoulders and watched as my orgasm overwhelmed me, as I came on her skin. She laughed, wiggling her hips under me and looking back at my face. "That was different," she said, smiling. I stared at her skin, running my hand over her back and finally climbing off of her. "It was." After I cleaned her back, we spoke for hours in the dark. I watched a hundred expressions pass over her face as we discussed her day, whether she was sore, if she had enough to eat. She watched me as though she could barely make out my face in the dark, but I soaked in every detail, loving how she eventually grew so relaxed that her eyes grew unfocused, directed at my lips. I pressed my fingertips to her mouth, tracing the curve of her top lip, kissing her beneath my own fingers every now and then. "Are you okay?" she asked, smiling against my fingers as I touched the corner of her mouth. I nodded and lowered my hand between her legs; she was swollen and warm there. She needed rest, but even so she moved against my hand. "Rest, Bella," I murmured.

"It feels good. It's cool and soothing." She wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me closer. "Come here and kiss me again. Why do I feel like you're studying me?" Though she was smiling, I knew the question was genuine. "I am studying you. I can't stop looking." Pulling back slightly, she looked me over. "You all right?" "I need you more every time we make love," I breathed. "I don't know how to explain it. I don't know how I am ever going to get enough of you." I pressed my fingertips against her clit, needing to feel her shaking from my touch. "Your body begs me for more and I want to give it, I do. I need more, all the time. It's almost like I can't show you or tell you how I feel but it's growing, and it's hard to contain." Her voice came out quiet but the words were shaking with her intensity. "Change me. Change me now. Change me because you want to keep me forever. Change me because of what we just gave each other. Change me because you know I need you more than anything in this world." I kissed her once, and then again, steadying myself. I felt like my chest was constricted by a tangle of wire, anxious and needy. I was at once terrified and in love beyond reason. My control was frayed and the sound of her voice, begging me for precisely what I wanted to give her at just that moment, reduced it to a single thread. I needed her to trust me because without that, I wasn't sure I could do it how I'd planned. "I do want you forever. I want you more than that. I am insane with need for you. But this isn't it. This isn't how it happens." "Edward, please, hear me," she whispered and I struggled to keep from breaking. It took every ounce of strength I possessed to beg her one last time. "Bella, can't you trust me?" I pressed my lips to hers, spoke against them. "I need you so much, please just let me do this my way." She looked at me, her eyes so close to mine. So much depth, so much passion in this one look she gave me. She whispered into my lips, "I just want my last human memories to be us, like this. I want a say in how this happens. I can't start eternity with you only on your terms." She didn't yet know that our terms were one and the same. "I do hear you, Bella. Please believe that I hear you. Please just have some faith in me." If she asked again, I would be unable to say no. Please Bella, do not beg me. I cannot say no again. I ran my hand over her back, stroking softly, hoping I could convince her to let this go and just give me this one last night with her. I had so much to say. ~O~ She fell asleep, finally. I inhaled to speak and stopped, instead bending to breathe in the scent of her hair; the sweetness of her shampoo mingled with sweat and the smell of sex. All around us was the smell of our lovemaking. "I fell in love with you on a Wednesday," I whispered, kissing her temple. "Although I met you on a Tuesday." She curled to her side, facing me and I wrapped my arm around her, pulling her close as I began my ritual. Except tonight would be the last time I would say this to Bella in her sleep. "Anyone who knew me would probably say it was love at first sight but I didn't understand what I was feeling. How can it be love if I was unaware?"

I kissed her forehead in apology. "There was blood lust, of course, but it was more than that. What I felt was a longing so intense it was painful." I smiled ruefully, remembering. "I interpreted the pain poorly. I was not used to pain that way, a pain of want or desire. The pain was from everything I wanted but that was unrequited. I had buried that part of me so deep for so long that it was unfamiliar. I assumed I could never love." I pressed my lips to her shoulder and then licked her skin there, tasting the faint saltiness of her sweat, of the lingering sweetness of my own venom on her skin from before. I must have licked her everywhere in our lovemaking tonight. I had been wild. She had been wild. "I wonder if you truly understand that, Bella," I whispered. "Do you understand what it means to me that you are here? What it means to me that I can love, that I have love, that you love me as intensely?" I paused and ran my finger down her naked back. Her skin was damp in the warm night and it gave me liberty to shift closer, to curl my leg gently across her hip, cooling her skin. "Even if I could sleep I am not sure I would want to. I would be too afraid of waking up and finding this to be a dream." She stirred in my arms, mumbling something unintelligible and I froze, not wanting her to wake. I needed this last night of confessions. Telling her the contents of my heart and mind like this was such an important ritual for me and soon she would never sleep again. Every night that I told her these things, I did it differently. I had no prepared speech, no single way of describing something as profound as my love for her or as agonizing as my apology for leaving her. I simply began speaking, letting the words flow out however they came. Even though tonight was monumental in that it was the last night of sleep that Bella would enjoy, and therefore the last opportunity I had to stealthily tell her the contents of my heart and mind, I didn't want to do it differently. "We fell in love quickly after that. You held me so tightly to your heart and I was just as fierce, if not terrified. What if I hurt you? The idea of you broken was unfathomable, and I was convinced it would be me that would hurt you." I inhaled and pulled her flavor into my head. "I did hurt you. I broke your heart by leaving and I do know that a part of you that used to be light will never be so again. I do know that. If I could undo anything in my existence, it would be that." I sighed. "But then I wonder what our life would be like if we had never had the pain of separation. Don't get me wrong, Bella. I would never presume to say that I made a good decision by leaving. But the idea that this... " I ran my hand down her naked back and across her backside, "this intimacy would be different between us if we changed even one little thing I can't imagine losing this. What are the chances we are stronger for it?" I shook my head and rested it against the pillow, watching the way strands of her hair drifted to the same rhythm as the curtains blowing into the room. "I love you," I said. "I love you so much I don't have space inside me to contain it all." I closed my eyes and inhaled. "I love this feeling." When I opened my eyes, I saw that her lips were moving but she was not speaking yet. Her face was so calm. She was so calm. "You would have made an amazing mother," I whispered. I didn't say more about this tonight. Sometimes the knowledge that we would never have children wrecked me. Tonight was one of those nights. Instead, I focused on what we were together, not what could never be for us.

"What we did tonight was" I shook my head and smiled, resting my palm still on her backside. "It was sublime." I pressed a kiss to her neck. "I can't wait to take you that way." I shifted my body away from her so she wouldn't be woken by my erection pressing into her thigh. "It was difficult to be away from you today but I'm glad you had time to sleep in. I had fun buying Jasper's costume but wanted to be back with you so acutely I almost don't remember buying it. I do remember buying the toys. Someday I want to do that together." I inhaled and drew a few spirals on her back. "There is something I want to tell you. Part of me hopes you can hear what I'm saying, if only so it gives you peace of mind until tomorrow night. I... " I didn't even know how to tell her. Every way I could think of phrasing it felt so trite. I heard my last syllable hovering in the air and exhaled slowly. I started to grow panicked. What if something goes wrong? What if, when I bite her, I am unable to resist drinking? What if I grow too excited during our lovemaking and break her neck before I have the chance to change her? What if my true nature comes out and I simply decide that a moment of true blissher bloodis worth the subsequent eternity of a screamingly tortured existence? "I'm scared," I whispered. "I need this so much. I need to be the one to do it. The idea of anyone else doing it just feels so wrong to me. But I'm scared, Bella. If I lose you... " I coughed and gave in to the terror for a minute. For one minute, I told myself. I stared at her and let my mind race through every horrible possibility. And then, I stopped. I sucked her scent into my head and remembered a million other things. The way I could touch her so lightly I had her begging. The way I could suck on her lip, kiss her fingertips, brush her hair with my own fingers. The way I resisted her virginal blood our first night together, the way I was able to pull back after saving her from James' venom. I remembered every time we made love, every time she put her mouth on me every time I pressed my fingers into her and didn't hurt her. I could do this. "I just need you to know one thing," I whispered. But instead of one thing, my mind still flooded with everything. So I simply pressed my lips to her forehead and said, "I love you." I said those three words over and over as the sun came up and I shadowed my hands over her back. Slowly, slowly she woke up and looked at me. My chest loosened. I needed to feel her. She blushed and I wondered briefly if she was remembering what we had done last night. I smiled and kissed her shoulder. "I love you," she said, hoarsely. "I love you so much." I had said the words so many times during the last hour she slept, and yet nothing seemed to fit that space inside me that barely contained my feelings for her as much as hearing her repeat them back to me. I sighed, nodding, and kissed the top of her head. Her body shook as she stretched in my arms. "I'm going to get some water and some fruit. I'll be right back." She kissed me and then climbed out of bed. I struggled to not reach for her, to beg her to come back to me long enough for me to hear her gasp my name. I moved to the bathroom, intending to shower and hopefully be able to get my mind off of keeping Bella naked in bed all day. I knew my family wanted time with her. Just as I turned on the water, I heard a shriek and then a crash. The entire house filled with the smell I had spent almost two years resisting.

I sprinted into the kitchen and felt my entire world collapse as I saw Bella, unconscious, in a pool of her own blood. The only thought I hadand it pulsed inside me like a drum hit again and again with a heavy malletwas that I could lick her wound close and turn her now, easily. She was naked, tiny. She smelled like me, like her, like us. I knew it didn't happen this way. "Bella," I said, panicked. I shook her shoulder. "Bella, wake up." I closed my eyes and felt the bloodlust pounding just beneath my skull. If I couldn't do this, I couldn't even think about biting her after making love to her. I steeled myself and prepared my body to be slow and gentle, to carefully sew Bella back together in order to take her life later tonight.