The Ten Commandments Revised Version Incorporating New Amendments, drafted over the course of many years, but

ratified Nov. 7, 2012  I am the Lord thy God, thou shalt not have any strange gods before me, except of course for the State and any deified, saintly political candidate that cometh along.  Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, except of thy president or of Che Guevara.  Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain, unless thy government hath neglected thee by reducing thy entitlement. Then curseth all thee wanteth.  Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. The Sabbath day, which art now redefined as either April Fifteenth or Election Day.  Honor thy father and thy mother, by suffering fifteen percent of thine income to them for Social Security and Medicare, plus more for prescription drugs and pensions.  Thou shalt not kill, except when thy elected officials send thee to war to murder innocents overseas.  Thou shalt not commit adultery, much.  Thou shalt not steal, but shalt gladly allow thy government to do so from thy neighbor in thy name, and heartily so!  Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor, but if thou seeest something, sayeth something!  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife. Lest Obamacare covereth male enhancement, then covet away.  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s goods, unless he haveth too much, in which case feelest thou entitled to it.

Sign up to vote on this title
UsefulNot useful