H O L I D A Y

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E D I T I O N

Babitch-Carpenter Family
N E W S L E T T E R

Of the

Another Year in the Books
How do you summarize a year as great as 2012? Should we focus on the fact that the world didn’t end (in that case you won’t get our 2013 newsletter)? Or maybe we could wax poetic on the Presidential election and the divide between Democrats and Republicans. Perhaps a family perspective on life lost (the gerbils) and new beginnings (a puppy) would be a good focus. Certainly the year brought changes for the boys in school and on the field, and for Cheryl and Leland in their professional lives. Maybe the best thing to say about 2012 is that it was the best time we had since 2011, and probably won’t hold a candle to all the great things to come in 2013!

Growing Like Weeds!
To all the friends and relatives who let us know that the boys seem to be getting “bigger” or “taller” all the time – yes they are. As a pediatrician, I must point out that it is normal and expected that children should grow. Ours are no exception. And, while they may be taller than many other kids their age, it should come as no surprise, given that their father is 6’2” and was always tall for his age.

Proof Positive! This picture shows:
A) Bradley and Dylan really can get along without strangling each other B) The only time “Babitch” has been on the back of team jersey since the beginning of organized sports.

THE LOREM IPSUMS

WINTER 2016

Travels and Culture
The Babitch-Carpenter clan trekked far and wide this past year. The world travelers had non-stop adventures both at home and

Italy
Cheryl and Leland celebrated their 15th wedding anniversary this year, and got rid of the kids escaped to Venice. Despite illness and heat, the couple managed to take in the sights and enjoy the rich culture (excluding the food) of the City of Canals. The pair hopes to return there soon (before it sinks).

Florida and Chicago
Cheryl, Leland, Bradley, Dylan, Mack and Carol headed to Florida in the early spring, and enjoyed the sights including Disneyland, Legoland and Gatorland (they have a lot of land in Florida). Special props go to the knights at Medieval Times. Cheryl just can’t stop talking about the show. Lee’s Hanukkah presents included horseback riding and jousting lessons, and he is growing a beard at Cheryl’s request. More recently, the family foursome spent a long weekend in Chicago watching Northwestern lose to Nebraska, the Lions lose to the Bears, and visiting Wrigley Field – baseball’s home to the longest streak without a World Series. The family is now in grief counseling.

Bradley
Inspired by his class poetry readings, Bradley has decided that he will move to France when he is old enough (probably 10). He is already pursuing the attitude and wardrobe of a typical Frenchman and insists that we call him Pierre. His new favorite foods – French fries and French toast. Cheryl, who studied French throughout high school, is proving no help with tutoring.

Dylan
Like his mother, who frequently travels to Wyoming, Dylan has discovered a love for everything Western. He is building a collection of cowboy hats and boots, as well as several belts with enormous buckles. He has started to culture a Texas drawl, and likes to say “y’all” and “I reckon.” We think he’s in for a real shock when he discovers that almost no one in the Cowboy Hall of Fame is Jewish.
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THE LOREM IPSUMS

WINTER 2016

The Year in Sports
2012 again proved to be a busy year for the BabitchCarpenter family in the world of sports. While the Tigers soared into the World Series, the family made it to several games, and even got some signed balls, and an entire team of bobble heads. The boys continued to excel at sports, and played football in the winter, spring, and then again through the fall and into the winter. Bradley’s team made it all the way to the semi-finals, where they suffered an unfortunate loss to a team of second graders (who must’ve been on growth hormones). Both boys enjoyed playing baseball, and again had a great team that took 3rd place in the league. While nobody generally celebrates 3rd place (AKA, second runner up), it is a great achievement for the Babitch-Carpenters, whose parents’ previous sporting accomplishments included awards for “Best Scorekeeper,” “Best Attitude,” and “Good Effort!” Both boys plan on careers in sports, though their parents are hoping for backup plans, like astronaut, rock star or President of the United States.

It’s Another Boy!
(at least he was until we fixed him)
The Babitch-Carpenters are extremely excited to announce the arrival of the world’s smartest dog – Tiger, now 10 months old. Tiger’s brilliance has astounded all of us. Under Leland’s tutelage, it only took one day to master Macintosh computers (Windows is still hard). Having mastered technical skills, Tiger tried his hands paws at landscaping, taking the initiative to remove a Hosta and replace it with a bright Hydrangea (he was right). His New Year’s resolution is to complete his first book, “How to Train Your Human.” Animal Planet has optioned the rights to the series. 3

THE LOREM IPSUMS

WINTER 2016

Halloween Haul
Watch Out Poppleton Park!
Bradley, Dylan and friends took on the task of trick-or-treating with a vengeance this year. The duo brought extra bags, Sherpas, and donkeys with them as the made their way through the streets of Poppleton Park. The totals are outlined in the graph. Though they have done a good job of working their way through the haul, some choices still remain (Werther’s originals, candy corn and Necco wafers…).

Prize Winner!
Cheryl was excited and honored to be recognized by her colleagues this past year as one of the best criminal defense attorneys in the state. At an award ceremony earlier this spring, she spoke passionately about defending the rights of the poor and voiceless. She and her counterparts from around the state had their names added to the coveted trophy for the great work they do with those accused of sex crimes. The boys seemed extremely excited during the ceremony, and everyone discovered why, when they paraded around with trophy yelling, “Stanley Cup! Stanley Cup!” and asking if they could drink beer out of it.

Parenting Corner
As the boys are getting older, discipline is becoming a bigger challenge. Never ones to ignore the latest trends, the exasperated parents have tried both the “tongue torture” method (espoused by Scientologists like Tom Cruise), and the “crating method” (recommended by Petsmart)

First Annual Caption Contest

In 50 words, or less, describe what the family is looking at. Fame and glory could be yours, as we will publish your name and caption in the next newsletter. Send your caption, with $50 entry fee*, to: Account 3457, Bank of the Caymans, Grand Cayman
As a lawyer, Cheryl felt obligated to add some text in small print at the bottom of this contest. Habeas corpus. Piecing the corporate veil. Assumed risk. Comparative negligence. Rule of perpetuities. (Those are about all the terms she remembers from her bar review course.) Any disputes will be handled by binding arbitration. The laws of the State of Confusion apply.

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THE LOREM IPSUMS

WINTER 2016

Eye on the Family
Though this publication tends to focus on the exciting times and happenings with Leland, Cheryl, Bradley, Dylan and Tiger, let us not forget to focus on the accomplishments and fun with other family members throughout the year. The Babitches (yes that is how you make it plural) got together with the Bermans and Mendelson’s over the summer for a HOT time in South Haven as the extended family celebrated their inaugural reunion. The extended family enjoyed their time together, despite the summer heat. Activities included lectures on flossing from cousin Sy, and raucous rounds of corn hole. Cheryl took the opportunity to join the cousins as they reintroduced baptism into the faith. Leland, Bradley and Dylan decided to have a boys’ weekend in St. Louis for Leland’s birthday. They took Mack along, and had a great time at the Arch, around Busch Stadium, and at the Budweiser tour (Dylan was the designated driver). Carol, our poet laureate, has been working hard with the boys to culture the young writers in them. Bradley has been working hard on a series of stories about a young boy who discovers that he is actually a wizard after living with his evil aunt and uncle for years. Dylan is working on his first script – a comedy about a group of guys who wake up in Las Vegas, only to discover that their bachelor party went terribly wrong. Special kudos again go to Gram-E, who bravely manned the house on Halloween to hand out candy while the rest of the family went out to Trick-orTreat. We know you snagged some of the Snickers for yourself, but still love you anyway.

Business News

Both Cheryl and Leland made big moves in their careers in 2012. No promotions or raises for the duo – relocations instead. Cheryl upgraded from her cramped, home office to a opulent place in Bloomfield Hills that is befitting of a high-powered attorney. She shares it with her colleague Shannon, and the two are settling in like queens. Leland was excited to see the finishing touches put on the newest building at the DMC, part of Children’s Hospital, and then was given an office in the oldest building on campus, which he was told is in a state of “benign neglect.”

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