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Jokes

Jokes

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Published by maged_lamiy
Jokes
Jokes

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Categories:Types, Comics
Published by: maged_lamiy on Jan 10, 2013
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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10/07/2015

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_Actor:_ "Are these poor relations of yours blood relations?"

_Fulpurse:_ "Yes; they are ever bleeding me."

* * *

There had been a collision near Euston Station between a timber-cart and
a cab.

The cart-driver said, with mock sympathy: "Oh, well, you can't help it!
You're doin' yer bit, you an' yer 'orse and yer blankety cabs all over
age!"

"You're doin' yer bit, too, ain't yer?" was the cabby's rejoinder,
"a'carrying of two lots o' wood--one in yer cart an' the other under yer
blinkin' 'at!"

* * *

SCOTCHED!

A parsimonious farmer notorious for the small rations he doled out to
his employees, said to a farmhand eating his breakfast,

"Jock, there's a fly in yer parritch."

"That disna' matter," replied Jock gloomily, "it'll no' droon."

The farmer stared at him. "What do ye mean?" he asked angrily; "that's
as much as sayin' ye hav'na' enough mulk."

"Oh," replied Jock still more gloomily, "there's mair than enough for
all the parritch I have."

* * *

THE BRUTE!

_Mrs. Newlywed:_ "What does that inscription mean on that ring you gave
me, Archie?"

_Mr. Newlywed:_ "'Faithful to the last,' my dear!"

_Mrs. Newlywed:_ "Oh! how could you? You always said I was the first."

* * *

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