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take charge of your life

take charge of your life

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Published by: S on Jan 25, 2013
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is going to throw problems and challenges at us at

every stage. The choice is ours, whether we want to take charge and face them or whether we want to sit back and complain about them and do nothing. Which means they will keep troubling us and we will keep reacting in the same old patterns. Why do we become sad and despair when we become unhappy? The answer is very simple, because I don’t like being unhappy, I don’t like the feeling, I want to be happy all the time, I want that pleasant feeling to last. Yet I continue to live this way with the same problems, the same sadness and the same anxiety about the future. Do I ever ask myself if I am capable of doing something about this problem that looks like an unbeatable demon at this time? If I can not solve the problem can changing something else make things better? Do I want to remain like this, till I am forced to face the issue (most times it is too late by then)? Why is it that inspite of being so fed up I don’t have the motivation to change; either the situation/people around me, or if that is not possible (which is the case 99% of the times) then change myself. Initially when the problem starts we start by trying to change the situation or the people we believe are causing the problem, but very soon we realize that changing any of them

energy. Be honest and sincere. Wow! That sounds almost . If you want to be happy you have to take charge of your life. we loose so many other things. I have complete control over my response. I decide my emotional. Somewhere in our heart we always knew that “self change” was required. In this process of changing others we loose many good relationships which we later regret. Why don’t I do that? Why does the thought of changing myself scare me so much? Why can’t I gather motivation to change myself? If I do get motivated out of desperation why doesn’t it last? What stops me from putting the effort? Have I ever tried? Why didn’t I succeed? Please ask yourself these questions and write down the answers. If I take a minute to think deeply and be ruthlessly honest I will realize that most circumstances would have changed if I changed myself whenever others refused to change. Read further only after answering these questions. intellectual. however people behave with me.is next to impossible and a waste of time. and emotions. and behavioral response to the things life throws at me and take complete responsibility for my behavior. Then we become desperate and feel hopeless and sometimes give up. What does taking charge mean? It means whatever are the circumstances around me. But alas! If only I invest half the energy I wasted in changing others in changing myself. there is no other way out.

he was not stuck there. and look where he is now. Examples can be multiplied. When we are not in charge of our lives we let the problem take charge and say “I could not help it!” YOU CAN! YOU MUST! Or else be ready to be swallowed by the problem. Hritik Roshan used to stammer badly. Sudha Chandran lost her leg. Sushmita Sen was educated in Hindi medium. he took charge and solved it. he did not let the problem overtake his life. The problem is here. Now it is up to us whether we want to do something to solve it and make ourselves feel better or keep crying and remain sad and frustrated endlessly. then why did this happen to me? But the point is what is the use of asking this question? It has happened and by repeatedly asking why it happened. look around you .impossible! But there is nothing more possible! Trust me when I say this there is not a better way to be happy! Now how does one go about doing this? Let us analyze our situation: what happens when there is a problem? Our immediate response is. But that did not stop her. he went beyond the problem. why did it happen? It should not have happened. not going anywhere. and she took charge of the situation and went beyond it. imagine the loss. I have not done any harm to others. she is a dancer. it is not going to go away. Mahatma Gandhi was arrested so many times he did not say I cannot help and give up. that did not stop her from participating in the Miss Universe contest. I don’t deserve this.

Don’t be angry and frustrated with everyone around you for the next one week because . Change is not easy. But I have complete control over my self and I am going to decide my behavior and not let circumstances make me dance to its tunes. The only difference being that when we have problems we start complaining “why me?” and remain there whereas they took charge of their life. Either take action or let go. they are like you and me. but if I choose to resist change because it is so difficult and takes so much effort then there is little hope for any good. I am not a puppet! Next time your boss humiliates you THINK! “Should I be assertive and politely let him know I am not at fault? Will it help or should I just keep quite and make the necessary corrections because it not worth telling him anything” be in charge and choose your emotion. I have to wait for some miracle to happen and make me a satisfied happy person. forget it and completely drop the issue. These are not extraordinary people. Don’t just react instinctively. because most often outside circumstances and people cannot be changed. but is remaining sad and frustrated any easier? With change there is a ray of hope that I will not remain like this for long. took action and solved it by changing themselves.and you will find many examples. When will that happen? HAPPY WAITING TO YOU! Take charge of your life!! Tell yourself everyday I cannot control anything or anyone other than me.

We react instinctively by getting angry and abusive. abusive.your boss was not good and say “I cannot help it. as if we don’t have a choice but to be angry. . The capacity to choose is the definition of being a human. How many of us choose? Most of us live like animals bound by our faulty ideas and emotions. I just feel that way”. depressed and anxious. If you hit a dog it cannot think “Should I bite back or forgive?” When followed by a tiger the deer can only run and that running gets it caught. YOU HAVE A CHOICE! Just as you have choice to read this or not! Choose you emotions and take charge of them. becoming depressed and frustrated or by becoming anxious etc. but man can choose to hide. choose his emotions. all the other species are bound by their instincts. That is animal behavior! In this entire creation only man has the capacity to choose his response.

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