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problems. to flag@erayd. and was last updated on December 16th. Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated . 2012. This story was first published on December 16th.fanfiction.please email any bugs. . feature requests etc.net/s/4720248/. 2008. All rights are reserved except where explicitly stated otherwise. 2008. The content in this book is copyrighted by CrystalBrooke or their authorised agent(s). based on content retrieved from http://www.net.Copyright Page This book was automatically created by FLAG on January 17th.
Funny.. Beatboxing and 2Pac. AH.. to Bella's mortification.Summary 1Shot.enough said. and why is he wearing such an atrocious snowman shirt? And who knew mistletoe could cause such a drama? B&E -3- . But who's the sexy guy. Charlie throws a 'hip' Christmas party.
I was going to be a hunchback by the end of the night.Chapter 1 OK. and they'd all be gone by half eleven. and the fifty other people who were here had all had one whiskey too many. My pleasant. I sighed. and I always gave the same answers. this is just something funny and silly that I wrote a few weeks ago. and then one extra. As if they weren't sad enough. My back was beginning to pain me. only this was far more painful to both witness and hear. How wrong I was. and tripping over their own feet as they stumbled towards me to interrogate me. I just assumed I could hide in my room. It was like torture. and whoever convinced him to try deserved to be shot. There were forty-nine-year-olds dancing. I had never been more mortified in all my life. I agreed without thinking about it. watching the people that surrounded him. They were crying with laughter. I was as red as the baubles that adorned the somewhat tacky tree in the corner of the room. being forty-nine and unable to tell you who Zac Efron was. -4- . "You're Charlie's daughter. quiet father was now attempting to beat box along to Tupac. They always asked me the same questions. He couldn't do it at all. aren't you?" Obviously. Isabella. Hope you get a laugh out of it! Enjoy x x x Mistletoe Kisses When Charlie decided to throw a Christmas party. Charlie had surprised me. thoroughly entertained. the slightly drunker ones attempting to provide the backing bass. but now they could add dancing to their list of totally lame things that they couldn't do. Random middle-aged nosy bat women kept spying me. Charlie. I had managed to sneak over to the corner of the room and was attempting unsuccessfully to blend into the wallpaper by trying to look as small as I possibly could. Because no normal teenage girl would be at a tragic party like this unless absolutely forced. My plan hadn't worked though.
Because they can always tell if I stand around too long. I am. and they're always agog for more information. piss off. No one talks to me at school. Gah. "Oh. "Oh. yeah. Call me Bella. Mr Banner's leer really brightens up my day. let me tell you. am I? Go and feed your husband before he starves. because I am invisible to everyone in school. I go back and hide in my corner. I was a total loser. Even that old guy who was picking his nose over there was cooler than me. thanks. I'm not one to kiss and tell…" That last answer drives them crazy. but I have no one to help me. thank you. "Oh. eh?" Oh. I had no friends. fine. I'm a terrible liar. now. I was at this party." "I'm sure you've made a load of new friends here. I had no boyfriend." "And how's the love life? A lovely girl like you is bound to have snapped up a good one!" Oh. so I'm hardly going to be swinging off the arm of some gorgeous." "How is school going?" Absolutely crap. loads. When they are distracted by another bottle of whiskey or sherry or whatever. I like to think of my teachers as my friends. It makes me sound interesting. and stupid. I fear I may be falling further behind in every subject every day."Yes. which is why I run away so fast. So I just blush and retreat extremely quickly before they can tell I'm lying and have no substantial evidence whatsoever to back up my statement. why yes. like I'm not just as pathetic as every loser at this party. No one is even momentarily fooled. which is why I regularly get sat on. I was just really glad none of these people who call themselves friends of -5- . They talk to me. I was such a loser. I was invisible. you dumb twit. if you haven't already gathered that. tanned and toned boyfriend. and sometimes they even smile at me.
embarrassing moments… nobody paid any attention to me. I raced into the hall. and have to listen to the surprised squeak of "Oh. because I had one of those shy complexes where I didn't speak unless I was spoken to. trying to catch up had been a bit of a nightmare. I'm not that small. which was thankfully empty. A few people talked to me. but I had long since given up on that -6- . and would probably never see them again. I just hated when people sat on me. I yell in protest. It had been exactly two months since I moved to Forks. an endless monotony. everyone had stared at me. I had hated all the attention. and very close to pulling out a conveniently hidden bazooka from the inside of my sock and opening fire on the lot of them. School was a stressful. or anything. I liked the fact that no one asked anything from me. now underway. hanging up on its hook. and I wasn't required to be cool. God help me. I went into a trance. I decided it was high time I left the room.Charlie's brought no teenage sons or daughters with them to witness my dad's 'impressive' break dancing routine. I didn't see you!" Get glasses. but once the realised how boring I was. Because I moved here in November. I didn't complain. including myself. Eyeing my father attempt to do the splits. I had no chance of making any friends here at this party. And if there were any people from school here. and shook my head. I don't know why they had a certain blind spot when it came to me. It felt like ten million years. facts and figures. Every day was the same. trying to rid myself of the urge. colours. judged and scrutinised me. my eyes mesmerised by the way the Christmas lights in the hall twinkled off of the tinsel wrapped around the radiator opposite me. I could just be sitting on the wall outside listening to my iPod and the next thing there's a big huge ass in my face. one day drifting into the other until I couldn't tell which day was Monday and which day was Friday. I was crippled with embarrassment. and no one paid any attention. When I had first arrived. they went back to their own friends and I was left mainly to my own devices. shapes. or beautiful. or nerdy. I could just be me. I eyed Charlie's holster. surreal blur of faces. And that was OK with me. I tried to get notes off other people. or sporty. voices. I hadn't seen them.
The last time. the perfect pale skin. merry Christmas. eventually. and the dazzling crooked smile. I nearly wet myself there and then out of sheer excitement and nerves. I fell over a lot. Just clumsy. He was grinning at me. I babbled and rambled and blurted stupid things and their eyes widened and they ran in the opposite direction. Hello. "Yeah. or else I walked into the glass doors of reception. in school." he said. glaring at the tinsel again. was leaning against the wall next to me. I wondered if it would always be like that for me. -7- . I wanted to think that maybe things could be different for me. and then promptly forgot about it. smiling shyly. idiotic moments like that. my voice an octave higher than usual. the green twinkling eyes. for some completely insane reason. Oh my God. at school. OhGodohGodohGod. my head snapping in the direction of the velvety. How did I miss this guy.ordeal. smiling back. and my eyes returned to him of their own free will. "Er. "Hi. "Hi. Sometimes people witnessed it. taking in the flop of bronze hair. The most gorgeous guy I had ever seen. I blushed and dragged my eyes away from the Sexy Beast. if anyone at all had noticed. horribly mortifying. walking around at my party? How could I do such a thing? My eyes drank him in hungrily. and I melted." I added. "I'm Edward Cullen. thinking they were open. I regularly mortified myself. My hands were shaking." I jumped violently. I couldn't talk to guys like this." I stammered. so I hid them behind my back. I was calling Jessica Stanley's name for the ninth time when she said suddenly to the person next to her: "Can you hear something or is it just me?" Horribly. or I tripped over that stupid loose floorboard in the English room for the millionth time." I said. and laughed. so completely under the radar I wasn't sure if I even counted. If I would always be so invisible. sexy male voice. usually on my face in front of the whole cafeteria." "Bella. you too.
in a very obvious attempt to distract me from his terrible and frightening shirt. Way to go. -8- . my parents dragged me along. It's shockingly awful. no. I'm here merely by force. "Totally. By all means. "My mom made me wear it. And he looked genuinely intrigued. I didn't mean…" he said awkwardly. then. thrilling to the way his name sounded when I said it out loud. He cocked his head to one side in the most adorable way." I said. A navy shirt. in an exaggerated accent. during which he gazed at me and the tight black dress I was glad I squeezed myself into. They are currently the ones singing out of tune on the Singstar. which surprised me." He laughed. They were waving at me." I said. "Parents. I made him awkward and uncomfortable. it's a great party…" Oh. With snowmen on it. Bella. and my eyes finally registered what he was wearing. "Charlie is trying to rap along to Tupac. before I could ask." I blushed a little. I gazed at him too. leer away at me." he said. Well. "Edward." "Oh. This is more like a Halloween party. damn. torn between wanting to laugh and hurl. Disturbing. "OK. his hands gesturing the hall around us. eh?" I said." he said. "So how come you're out here and not joining in with the festivities?" he asked hurriedly. and I forgot all about the freaky snowmen with their wide eyes and creepy grins. quite lamely. All the drunken leers I had received from Charlie's friends had been worth it. and unfortunate genetic coincidence." I said. "My dad is the one hosting this debacle. There was a short little pause. If you strain your ears."Did you get dragged here too?" Edward asked. you can just about hear them over your dad's spectacular rapping. "I see. "I mean. "Oh. Edward. and I giggled. Edward was totally gorgeous. shaking my head. his cheeks tinged with the cutest shade of pink.
"That bad. "Yeah."I'm hiding. Plus." was my excellent and witty comeback. No one needed to hear my every thought. right. My dad screeching the words "NO MATTER WHERE I GO. "You just asked me one of the Questions. and when I saw you sneak out here I decided in a very stalkerish way to follow you. talking to me. it's not that. and I almost forgot where I was. and he frowned. yet I still insisted on blurting them out anyway." He smiled lazily and cocked his head to the side again. How's school. looking as though he was trying not to grin." I sighed. huh?" "No." "Questions?" He was confused. and we just continued to stare at each other. I SEE THE SAME HO!" brought me back to reality again. "I'm hiding too. I couldn't believe he was at my house. I'm glad I did. Mr Sexy Beast. and quite rightly so. I shouldn't have said anything." "Oh." Edward said. have you got a boyfriend? I've been quizzed multiple times already by old nosy bats. Almost. I spied you half an hour ago and nearly fainted with relief that there was someone my age I could talk to. "Oh. "So…" he said eventually. "Why?" "Wouldn't you be hiding if your dad decided he could rap and beat box and dance all in the one go?" "Touché." he said thoughtfully." I'm so glad you did too. "Hiding?" he repeated." I said. "How are you finding school?" I groaned. his eyes twinkling. There was another pause. -9- . have you made any friends. "Would you mind me asking you the same questions again? I'm curious now. "How come you're out here?" I challenged.
Do you have a boyfriend?" ." I smiled and looked away from him. "That would be great." Edward grinned." he said. unable to tell whether or not he was being sarcastic. you're nice. You can tell me the truth. "So. dazed. and I was really looking forward to the next question… not… "So. it's going crap. second question. helping me with my schoolwork? I'd be insane to turn that down." Oh. Edward." he offered."I suppose not.10 - . "I'm honoured. "How are you finding school?" he asked again. I nearly choked. really. I couldn't keep up in school. thanks. Oh so nice. I'm nice like that. if it wouldn't be too much trouble for you." "OK. that's no good. relief rushing in at the thought of finally getting help. no matter how stupid I would feel every second of it." he continued." I said automatically. nodding. unable to find my voice. "If you need any help. "Well." I said excitedly. "Fine. Here's the question I'm most interested in. if you want. yes. "You don't need to give me the same answer you gave them. this sexy beast." he said. "I wouldn't want you struggling. You're very. I'm falling behind… it's not going great. I don't know anyone." I breathed. counting you… it brings it to a grand total of… one. I couldn't make any friends. you know. and then I was quite ready to tell him my whole life story. a suppressed laugh in every syllable. very nice. "Have you made any friends?" I was almost too embarrassed to admit it. but there was something about him that compelled me to tell him I was a total loser. Edward was frowning again. "Well. Not being lost any longer." he said. He must have thought I was so pathetic." I sighed. then. "No problem. "Well. I wouldn't mind helping you.
his name is Tim. at the blessed green leaves and white berries. Another few inches and he would be touching me." Edward joked. nervously. and Charlie. He was so close to me. "Bella. "I practically gave you a thesis on me. while I turned red. meeting his eyes. He mightn't even have spoken to me at all if any other teenager was at this party. "Dammit. "I did. grinning. and I really. I hadn't been able to smell it a moment ago. I was ninety-eight percent certain he had moved closer to me . Oh my God." I blurted out randomly. almost hyperventilating. You know what?" he whispered. really felt like kissing him. Thank you God." Edward said. I want to tell you a secret. and only I can see him. He was facing me now. and I nearly collapsed. and Mary. and Joseph.I could smell his aftershave. and I panicked. I had no words to describe how hot this guy was.11 - . "What?" I breathed." I said. my whole body in full hyperventilation mode. if you are any way interested in that fact. standing quite close to me. and Santa. He gazed at me for a moment." he said. and it couldn't possibly get any more gorgeous. Probably. He was oh-so-close now. and Jesus." I said. But I wasn't sure if he was really that interested in me. "Well. I raised my head and looked above me. and the sound of my name spoken aloud in his deep and velvet voice made me shiver.Had he moved closer to me? I think he moved closer. I could count the number of times I had been kissed . There were a load of fifty-year-old drag queens in the next room who were more attractive than me. "I didn't realise. "You're standing under mistletoe. Thank you so much." I nodded stupidly. I wanted him to kiss me. still breathless. moving his head closer to me so he could speak softly in my ear. and I lowered my face again. "I don't have a girlfriend. "Yes. Anyone else was cooler than me. His crooked smile widened." he said slowly. "Can I tell you a secret?" "You might as well." He chuckled. Automatically.
Dad!" "I WILL NOT RELAX! YOU WERE OUT HERE MAKING OUT WITH THIS FANCY DUDE HERE . surrounded by a selection of random people. "HE'S FOOLING AROUND WITH MY DAUGHTER.on one hand. drunken guests clamoured in the doorway. "Hey. hey. "Oh. and he was probably going to be able to tell how awful I was and be disgusted by me. My dad was standing in the doorway of the hall. the burning sensation of his hands using my waist to pull me closer to him… Santa had outdone himself this year. the mortification… But then he kissed me. "YOU WOULD WANT TO CONTROL THAT ONE. "What trouble have you caused now?" Edward rolled his eyes. I knew I was going to be awful. "ISABELLA SWAN! EXTRACT YOUR TONGUE FROM THAT YOUNG MAN'S MOUTH THIS INSTANT!" We jumped apart in fright." Fancy dude? I ask you. shrouding me and filling my head. for all. and I went as red as Santa himself. focussing blearily on him. and my hands tangled in his hair and all I could think about was his heady scent all around me. CARLISLE!" Charlie shouted. son!" Edward's dad said. He was embarrassed? I was wishing death on everyone. "WHAT'S ALL THISSS YELLIN' 'BOUT?" A rather dishevelled but extremely handsome guy wrestled his way through the throng of entertained. slow and torturous death. and my eyes closed. looking drunk and outraged." Edward said nervously. the taste of his lips against mine. Edward coughed and ran his fingers through his hair embarrassedly. Dad.12 - . including myself. and gah. "WHAT IS GOING ON?" Charlie roared. "Relax. "Nothing!" I yelled back. his tongue twisting with mine." .
"COP A GOOD FEEL OF WHAT EXACTLY?" Charlie roared. "What boyfriend?" Carlisle asked interestedly. swaying where he stood. kill me now. "There is no boyfriend!" I dramatically pointed upwards at the mistletoe. in an oddly disappointed tone. it was Edward and me alone again." "Really?" Edward said." . "Really!" Carlisle said exuberantly. finally demented. and watched everyone's eyes raise to glance at it. apprehensively. "What boyfriend?" Edward asked. "There's highlights of the game on!" The crowd immediately dispersed. "WHAT BOYFRIEND?" Charlie screeched. He was exactly the same shade red as me. "Good on ya.13 - . "Hey. finally turning in my direction. really. but he had no argument. "I thought it was pretty incredible myself. Comprehension dawned. Charlie!" someone shouted from within the living room. adding fuel to the fire. "BUT -" Charlie began. He had put up the damn mistletoe." someone hissed. son! Did you cop a good feel?" Edward seemed to visibly shrink in size. and Edward shrugged quickly. Bella?" Old Pervy Lady inquired from the back of the crowd. "That was the single worst thing to ever happen to me and I'm so sorry about that. A few seconds later. "SHUT UP!" I yelled. There was no rule stating I could get no action under it. please.Oh. "What was he doing?" Carlisle asked." I whispered. "Kissing. "I am so sorry. no further argument or input from any of them. "Is this that boyfriend you were telling us about. We had so much in common.
frowning." "Oh fantastic. and I haven't been able to stay away from her ever since. "We'll get over it." he said. "I'm doing really well. waving his hands dismissively. . and I'm hoping to get into Dartmouth. THE FOLLOWING CHRISTMAS CHARLIE'S NOW ANNUAL CHRISTMAS PARTY "So Bella. "The kiss." "Ah. We got together at Charlie's last party." Edward interjected. "Oh. Alice and Rose should be coming with me. "Great. And Jasper and Emmett and Edward. "Yeah. He still wanted to kiss me. appearing behind me and wrapping an arm around my waist. They're all drunk. And we made out numerous times after that. even after that? And it turned out that yes. "A year." Edward said." "How is the wonderful boyfriend?" Wink. I mean the whole scene there a moment ago. he did. "And how long have you two been together now?" Oh Nosy One asked."What?" I was confused. and won't remember this in the morning. under the mistletoe." I smiled. In the meantime though… you're still standing under the mistletoe." I agreed. I beamed stupidly at him. "Still wonderful." I said. of course. that was great." Edward said. "No. how's school going?" Nosy Old Lady asked me. Will all your friends be going there too?" "Yeah.14 - ." I was shocked and amazed. grinning.
winking. A tray of whiskey floated by. "The dreaded questions again. I couldn't help but laugh at him." I mumbled." he told me. but he had never forgiven either of us for making out in the hall without his 'permission' last year. BUT WOULD YOU PLEASE CONTROL YOUR HORMONES?" Edward turned pink. laughing under his breath. The whole room turned to look at us. "Oh. and her eyes glazed over." he muttered self-consciously." Edward grinned that gorgeous crooked smile. "Well. now isn't that nice?" Nosy Bat said. "Don't listen to him. At least Edward had made it better. eh?" he teased. "Yep. and I wanted to die. and kissed me anyway. distracted. . He moved in to kiss me. the one that still dazzled me. at least I have good answers for them now. "I HEARD THAT. I'll make sure there is a later. "He's just drunk and annoying.15 - . "EDWARD CULLEN! PUT THAT MISTLETOE DOWN RIGHT NOW BEFORE I GET THE GUN!" My dad thought Edward was great for me. But Edward just grinned. and she chased after it. before pocketing the mistletoe again. "Charlie. has confiscated all his mistletoe after what happened last year. "For later. "But look what I got…" He produced a bunch of mistletoe from his pocket and held it up the air above our heads. a light gentle kiss. the one I could still never get used to. YOU TREAT ISABELLA VERY WELL AND YOU'RE A STRAPPING YOUNG MAN.My insides glowed at his words. and cringed at the same time in memory of that fiasco of a party. looking all delighted for us. Sexy Beast. grinning back at him. Edward lowered his voice. BY THE WAY! THERE WILL BE NO LATER! EDWARD. Edward grinned at me as she stumbled away." I said." he said. it appears.
and everyone was distracted. fighting over what song they wanted to sing. "Bonnie got the Singstar working!" someone yelled suddenly." "I HEARD THAT. I still manage to get mortified severely." "You'll always have me. no matter what. NOT YOU!" . CARLISLE! I AM SINGING BRITNEY.16 - . would you shoot me first?" I snapped. WELL. WELL. But at least I have you. TOO! I AM SO CLOSE TO GETTING THE GUN." he said. Edward smiled at me and kissed my forehead."ISABELLA SWAAAAAN! DO YOU THINK I'M DEAF?" "No. "I'm sick of you embarrassing me critically every Christmas. does it?" "Nope. "Merry Christmas." Charlie spluttered. struggling to think of a comeback." "TAKE A HIKE." I sighed." "Well." "YEAH. "Never changes. but you're making me deaf. IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY. "Somehow. YEAH.
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