Invitation to the Self
journey with the star people

Bonnie Jean Hamilton illustrated by Bonnie & Bryan Hamilton

Copyright © Bonnie Jean Hamilton, 2005 All rights reserved ISBN# 978-1-4116-2673-7

Dedicated to those who live the Experience



This is where I have been And what has driven me To Look farther And Find That which beckons me – My Soul.Those long years of waiting… Like wading through snowdrifts in wintertime. v . The cold wind blowing strands of hair across my eyes So I could not see What was hidden there Some Truth within myself… To only see a glimpse Of that radiating beauty and light.

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Table of Contents Introduction About Me Visitation • • • Part One: operations Part Two: hybrids Part Three: implants 15 47 69 1 3 Training • • • Part One: testing Part Two: the secret government Part Three: transitional phase 85 111 133 Graduation • • • Part One: earth changes Part Two: psychic attack Part Three: the connection 149 165 181 Taking Control • • • Part One: overcoming psychic attack Part Two: controlling the dream state Part Three: energy manipulation 203 223 251 265 271 Conclusion Glossary vii .

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I have seen wondrous things in the physical plane and beyond. that was just a dream. all matter has a life of its own. All my life I have wondered what was beyond the physical realm…because I knew there was something more. in which the professor taught us about anthropological hoaxes.” no matter how intent I was. Since I was born. in any dimension. So. and they didn’t care to take any time to try and understand. no matter what dimension or plane of existence.” I did not give up. it merely changes form. my body being split down the middle. There is no death and there is no way that an experience or life occurring on this plane or any other plane of existence. but whenever I open my mouth. there I was. “honey. No matter what construct. or delusions emanating from insane people who belong in state hospitals. is not “real. Of being told that alien abductions are either hoaxes fabricated for the purpose of making money. I have felt it with all my being since I was a small child. I knew then when I was just starting out in life. These concepts are not welcome in the physical world. I get shot down. during my senior year. Energy does not die. Energy is Life. a young. including the concept of visitors from other planets.Introduction My life has been a tumultuous upheaval of not knowing which world to focus on. Even when I went to college I attempted to speak to professors about “star people” and they brushed it off. it is not 1 . or any period in time. that everything. They didn’t understand what I was trying to say. I think I have had my feet in two worlds. I actually took a class. impressionable individual living extraordinary experiences with no explanation given to me except.

2 . Well…I don’t care anymore.socially acceptable to push the boundaries of our fragile belief systems. Welcome to my book.

I talked to the Earth and the Earth loved me. Life was good. At the bottom of the hill we lived on was a lake and off to the side of the cabin was a small waterfall. I had not a care in the world. a few raccoons and. Walking wooded paths lined with ferns and moss was a daily activity. but would float amongst the pleasant images. At times the images were not pleasant. I saw it again when I was older. the trees. I would see pictures floating through the air in my bedroom. I saw animals. I had a special feeling in my heart for every living thing. I did not understand what was happening and would sometimes become frightened. candies. of course. My playmates were our two dogs. the warm sunshine embracing me. like a blobby "whale" figure that kept bothering me . ice cream. I began to experience nightly "visions". my family and I lived in a small log cabin in the woods. this was a peaceful existence. at times during never seemed to be terribly threatening. and that is how I had expected it to stay…. 3 . the ducks and geese. As I got a little older. and guided me through fear and sadness. in bed at night when the lights went out. Needless to say. I had a great respect for nature and all its beauty. helped me work through difficulties. There were a few kids that I played with occasionally who lived in the countryside as well. and toys. It has taken the shape of a whale and also a dolphin. Our nearest neighbor was at least a mile away. It assisted me in learning. and also the only world I knew.About Me When I was four years old. seemingly out of place. I have since discovered that the mysterious blobby figure drifting amongst the enticing images of candies was a spiritual guide. I can remember sitting in the newly fallen autumn leaves.

On another occasion that I recall. I had been wide-awake when this occurred. however. turned out to be nothing compared to what was to come. two knotholes that were on the wooden door of my bedroom . They were holding hands. as they had no visible eyes or other facial features. When that did not work. She stared at me and then looked into the air. so I sat up and began grabbing at them. The figures vanished as she entered the room. There were no discernable features. I woke my mother with all the commotion. trying to figure out what I was doing. One very early morning in particular. there seemed to be a turning point in my young life. but she could not see them. regardless. which made me feel as though they were friendly in some way (at least to each other). as I tried to tell my mother what I had witnessed. I wasn’t having any luck at physically 4 . I screamed loudly and my mother came running. I decided to stand up for better reach. I was clearly distraught. I became frightened of little things. After that incident. I was terrified. I explained to her that I was trying to "grab those candies" and the tea set. occasionally jumping. when I was a child. The blobby whale figure. I saw the images of candies and a play tea set in the air. but even so. I recall sitting up in my bed and seeing two "stick people" with huge bulbous heads approaching the footboard.I thought they looked like two big eyes. I only saw it as a foreign anomaly and intruder. but I was able to see these images. It was clear that I was awake.However. for instance. I had curled up next to my mother in her bed while she was asleep. It troubled me so much that my parents painted the door in a vain attempt to try and cover the knots.

And according to my conscious memory. This particular alien showed a vague resemblance to the blobby whale figure. my mother informed me that when I was an infant/small toddler. I also took note of his unusually light colored.they had to "wait for it to end. what happened that night and what happened to me every night. this was very true. She listened patiently and lovingly advised me to get rid of the whale image by telling it to "go away. and I will tell you about that soon." which led them to believe that I was actually still asleep and dreaming. Even though I was only seven and not very tall myself. because he was my friend. and my poor mother seemed to be on the edge of hysteria. "It looked like you were awake. When I was seven years old. This did not scare me however." My mother told me. I had no conscious recall of the events that occurred during that time period until just recently.getting anything." According to my parents. I did not know how I went from being terrified of the bulbous-headed stick figures to being friends with this alien. but when we brought you over to the light." but she never fully understood what was going on with me. For most of my adult life. 5 . with my eyes wide open. My parents tell me that I had no recollection of these "night terrors" in the morning and was a perfectly happy and spoiled child. he was shorter than me. I experienced "night terrors. A few years ago. so I sat down. the best that any four-year-old could. I dreamt that an alien was in my house with me. I would begin screaming and crying during the night for no apparent reason that anyone could tell. but to no avail . They would hold me in an attempt to comfort me. and I explained to her. She questioned me for some time about that night. your pupils were fully dilated.

the alien and I rushed into a closet to hide. As I did.” They were trying to break into the house. I felt comfortable and safe being near him and trusted him like an old friend. When I was nine years old. I screamed and woke up. Running through an open door. They chased us around the kitchen table and I fell.the robbers spotted us and began chase.creamy white skin and lack of hair. because some bad men were after us. we were both quiet and listening intently. We knew that if they caught us. I had this dream once again. In no way did his appearance disturb me or seem unfamiliar. we entered the kitchen with the bad men trailing too close for us to escape. Going to the front window and peering out. two years later. picking up the books and throwing them out the front door at the unwelcome intruder. I then remember my alien friend and I going outside. I was 6 . I called these two men “robbers. I remember standing side by side with the little alien. without looking back. they would coat us with gold and turn us into statues. one of the men rushed over to slip a tiny. We were mistaken . thinking the way was clear. my alien friend and I left the closet and walked out into the living room where we saw my father. rectangular piece of paper under my left side. It was trying to get in the door. I saw a fox trotting across the lawn. In the dream. After hiding for quite a while and determining that we were safe. but I didn’t let it in because I knew it was connected to the robbers. just below my ribcage. chasing it away. and I looked down at him as he looked up at me. My father pointed to the set of encyclopedias on the coffee table and suggested I hurl books at the fox. approaching the house. So. I took his advice. Everything happened the same way except that this time. we dashed across the street to the neighbor’s house. in fact.

my alien friend and I were running from the robbers in my neighbor’s kitchen. Because I had previously been so afraid of the visitors. tucked me in. screamed. trying to focus on the details. simply bewildered by having the same vivid dream twice. I quickly flung the books and. in fact. straining. whom I do not recall well. like I did before. Feeling a twinge of panic and hoping that my eyes were playing tricks on me. I was nine years old. through the the living room watching the fox out the front window and someone other than my father was there with me. The doll was alive. One of the bad men placed a tiny. I quickly looked away and pulled the blankets over my head. he ran away. It did not seem strange to me to have an “alien friend” however. just as planned. I was lying in my bed. so I kept it in mind for future reference. rectangular piece of metal under my left side. The eyes and mouth began to move as she swayed from side to side. it slowly came to life. read me a story and kissed me goodnight. just like before. suggested that I “throw books” at the fox. and each night I asked them to 7 . this made no sense…until my recall. As I stared at my favorite dolly’s face. I must have been about six or seven years old. I was running around the same table and fell. As I remember it. they turned my bedroom light off and closed the door. Of course. It was always a little scary for me. and woke up. It was as though I had known him forever. At the end of this dream. I fell onto it. The suspense drew me back. the symbolism meant nothing to me at the time. I knew it was odd. just below the ribcage. it seemed quite normal. This someone. Now for a bit of background information: Almost every night after my parents helped me into bed. to see my dolls lined up on a shelf on the opposite side of the room.

and that was okay. I saw images floating in the air as I always had. Upon taking these forms. Each step closer gave the dolls a more alien appearance until they reached the side of my bed and I saw them for what they were – my alien friends. step down from the shelf and walk over to my bed. as I drifted off to sleep. growing in size as they approached. that actually contained what I called "alien friends. They waited patiently and made no visible effort to force me into going with them. In addition to this bizarre experience. On this evening in particular. another one developed: My dolls seemed to come to life! At times. I knew who they were. which they did. I knew to pull back my covers and slip out of bed." My family and I moved to a new area and I met new friends to socialize with. I watched the dolls come to life.come back and check on me. I'd had a handful of dreams. it looked as though they were talking to each other. I am now under the impression that this type of event happened quite frequently. as long as they kept to themselves and didn’t bother me. By that time. gently held out their hands. I tried not to look at them. Regardless of this fact. on either side of me. through the living room. two of them. but it was difficult to turn away. which I recall at this point. I was very open-minded to unusual events happening during the course of the night. I placed my hands into theirs and we slowly and quietly walked past my sleeping parents. the dolls no longer scared me. We played together almost every day and had adventures ranging from goat herding to swimming in the bay. When my feet touched the floor and I stood there with them in my dark bedroom. I 8 . The visions and images in the darkness continued until I was about nine years old or so. As if I had done it countless times. and out the front door.

The adults just humored me and told me to go play. Naturally. We laughed and talked while sharing some type of snack they had brought with them. They walked into my yard and we sat down together at the picnic table. When I was 11 years old. being the curious child I was.had no trouble learning new concepts and did well in school. I remember them being tall and thin with light-colored skin. threw on some clothes. and I was happy to hear that. but I was not completely unfamiliar with them. It was late at night and I was lying in bed when a flash of light caught my eye.I think my cousins wanted to 9 . which I courageously greeted. A UFO was landing in the large parking lot beside my house. an event occurred that made a strong impact on my life. Before leaving. I quickly got up and went to the window. I was much more curious than I was frightened with these friendly people. The next morning I jumped out of bed. about the dream. including my cousins who were there. These aliens were new to me. I was convinced from the vividness of the event that aliens had really come in the night . but none of that changed the nightly visions. I felt as though I had been through some sort of evaluation and had passed the test. Standing in a huddled group were five or six aliens. and ran to tell my whole family. but I do not recall anything unusual about their heads or eyes. as they seemed the normal size and shape of a human's. and they seemed to already know me. there was no hesitation on my part to run ecstatically through the house and then outside to investigate. calling me by name. but my cousins were very excited about searching the parking lot for "UFO marks" and the prospect of actually finding evidence of a landing site. they made it clear to me that they would come back to see me again.

I exclaimed to my boyfriend to look. the nightly visions vanished as vivid dreams took their place. It was truly disappointing.believe it as well. etc. for that matter). I barely noticed (or cared to notice. I watched the night sky for weeks afterward. I was doing well in school and had healthy relationships with friends. My boyfriend and I had been out on a Saturday night. we both saw the same light – going back up. so we kept watching the sky. carrying notebooks to record our findings. but didn't find anything more than a few oil spots from cars. After about five minutes. knowing that we had seen something special. I was promoted directly from 10th to 12th grade and studied advanced English Literature classes.” While we listened to terribly loud rock music. talent shows. majorettes. a light caught my eye. My daily life of school. We made a kind of detective game out of it. Perhaps what triggered this change in consciousness was what occurred the week I conceived my child. cruising the streets in his new black sports car. married and had my first daughter that I began to think about my own unusual experiences once more. We slowly turned to each other. like an enormous meteorite. boys.m. watching the ripples in the dark water. It was not until I was 19 years old. but although I experienced more vivid "alien dreams" throughout my teenage years. 10 . marching band. had taken all the excitement away from my sleeping moments. I was apparently at a new stage of development. Subsequently. The unusual sight intrigued me. guitar playing. We literally searched all day long. but he missed it. track team. I looked up quickly to see a rather large white light falling from the sky. we parked in a wooded area overlooking the water at one of those “lover’s hangouts. At around 12:30 a.

I had time to contemplate. I picked up a copy of an Edgar Cayce book about dreams. I saw a great intelligence in her. would be beneficial to the everyday waking life. When my daughter was born. as I was then responsible for a life other than my own. but one in particular that captured my curiosity was that of dream interpretation. and looking up through the towering pines to see the stars lighting the branches like Christmas lights. I studied various subjects. My boyfriend and I married and moved into our own place. listening to the crackling fire. I spent much more time at home. I longed to know more about the mysteries of our world.That same week. and the stars were absolutely sparkling. their symbolism and interpretations. The night was cool and clear. I felt the need for stability and comfort. This would be the night I would become pregnant. I had never felt this sense of peace and happiness before. I remember lying in the hammock we had set up. feeling very attached to this beautiful little girl. 11 . we went on a little camping trip. I loved to look into her deep blue eyes. what is beyond it? And my favorite: What does “nothing” look like? Being an inquisitive individual. I was changed. quiet location in the woods. I wanted to learn about the human spirit and its potential. and I loved to spend time with her. Our site was in a wonderful. Cayce suggested that to record one's dreams every morning. I read books about the soul and about metaphysical ideas that are not usually taught in classrooms. to just sit and think about life. those compelling portals of love and light. whether on paper or on cassette tape and look back over it later. My thoughts eventually led me to questions that are not easily answered: How did life begin? Where did we come from? Does the Universe have a boundary? If so.

I attempted to read the book. as realization hit hard. My heart sank as my body went numb and my breathing became barely noticeable. Something in my mind clicked and a memory was triggered. The book tells the story of a woman who had horrible alien abduction experiences. When I was 20 years old. allowing the individual to interpret his or her own dreams. that did not fit in with the other "normal" dream symbolism. until one evening when I read just enough to make the connection between the book and my dreams. unsuccessfully. but I did not get far before I was so scared that I could not continue. A cold chill came over me as fragments of my own recollected dreams popped into my mind. The book fell from my hands onto the floor. making it easier to figure out daily problems of life in general. certain dream patterns would emerge. I had no conscious preconceived notions of what an alien abduction was. I eventually began to recall more and more dreams each morning and was able to discover patterns and decipher them.I had forgotten all about the "alien dreams" from my childhood. but I did not know how . I took Edgar Cayce's advice and recorded my dreams almost every morning in a spiral notebook. but my curiosity kept me trying. I noticed a particular sort of dream pattern that seemed odd to me. At that point. I felt my mouth hanging open and hot tears streaming down my face. Something in the book felt familiar to me. It took many months for me to pick up the Intruders book again.According to Cayce. I wrote these dream experiences down and made no judgement on them until a year or so later. I tried and tried to read the book. 12 . I received a copy of the book Intruders written by Budd Hopkins. I continued reading little bits and then putting it down.

sometimes more. What brought it on.The next five years of my life would bring an "alien visitation" at least once a week. as I became enrolled in an intense training program taught by the star people themselves. I cannot say…perhaps it was my mind being triggered by the book. 13 . I would like to share with you some of the highlights and most meaningful experiences that have occurred. and the memories of previous experience returned to me.

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Visitation Part One operations 15 .

My own experiences were so much like his. they were barely legible. One thing I have noticed that makes my experience somewhat different than others is that I have been able to gain a certain level of control and have learned how to deal with the visitations. 16 . It seemed we both saw the possibility of the phenomenon being a spiritual learning experience. my recorded dreams were the first place to look. I lost all sense of direction. I had the immediate mindset of a helpless victim. I realized there was not actually a threat. Another book that opened my eyes to the world of alien abduction was Whitley Streiber’s Communion.but what were they? I knew I would need to collect as much information as I could and attempt to analyze the data. my typical reaction upon seeing a star person was to run up and say Hello. In this case. Obviously. After reading Intruders. I try to look at every angle to find a solution. there was the realization that things were not “normal” . After becoming accustomed to the visitations. upon seriously analyzing the data and becoming more consciously aware of the experiences. I wanted to be open to the experience.Invitation to the Self In the beginning. once we got past the initial shock. I examined what amounted to fragments of what my mind had recalled in those early morning hours following the visitations. I felt like I’d found a friend. to keep the records better organized. even if I did feel scared at the time. when I was hit with the sudden realization at 20 years of age that I had been abducted by aliens. however. I began to recopy my notes into a newer notebook. Some words had been scribbled so quickly. This is something I have always done. whenever I have a problem or a difficult situation to deal with. whatever came my way.

It would not be unusual for me to approach a star person and feel his or her skin. In surprise. and it is so difficult to discern who is who that I will use one term for the time being. I would either use the term “aliens” or “star people” (with “aliens” referring to a negative experience that I did not like). I think there are a few bad apples in the bunch. I began to use the term “star people” following an event in which a friendly visitor had a conversation with me about the connectedness of all beings. most of the time. I felt this was somehow true. So.” as if he assumed I had known that all along.Operations My perspective over the years has come to be that these "aliens" are just people from another place. For matters of simplicity. for a while.” and he seemed taken aback by that comment. every now and then. and I am known to be just as curious as they are. I now call all the visitors “star people. And. And. There were. there have been quite a few times when I did things differently than what the star people had expected. examine the eyes. or wrap my hand around an upper arm and yell out. 17 . they would simply leave and come back a few nights later. I have not always been cooperative with them. “I am not an alien. "Man. and I usually had the freedom to move about as I pleased. I had referred to him as an “alien. touch the face. putting some thought into it. you're skinny!" Perhaps this is due to the fact that I had remembered the visits from childhood and had become accustomed to spending quite a bit of time with them from an early age in life. I have always tried to wear a pleasant smile and.” Just like with any people. when I did not feel like dealing with them. simply attempt to “go with the flow” of the experience. he said to me. I am your brother. those few rare occasions when I was paralyzed and taken against my will. all depending on how I felt about a visitation. however. Of course.

confusing and filled with symbolism: This happened on a normal evening.operations. and I did not feel like I was there voluntarily. I did not recall boarding the train. as I felt wide-awake and aware of my surroundings. implants. egg extraction. The train came to a screeching halt. it seemed as if I were suddenly on a train! Needless to say. which I promptly pulled. Unfortunately. However. my thoughts quickly turned from. rushed over and grabbed me by the arms. "Wasn't I just going to bed?" to "Boy it's crowded in here…. scars. This is where the stereotypical “going onto the spaceship and being examined by aliens” takes place. I went through my usual routine of washing up and getting pajamas on." A large group of people surrounded me. I searched around and found an emergency cord. The idea that everyone agreed upon and chatted about excitedly was that we were all going to a rock concert. while my husband was left behind in 18 . Here is an example of an early visitation. I didn’t know how I had gotten on the train. including my husband who stood next to me. and hybrid children. I decided that something was wrong. I was escorted to the front of the train (the engine room). my entire being was jolted with shock. A small group of almost identical people entered the train car. Not long after lying down and getting comfortable in my bed. regardless of the people trying to convince me how wonderful the concert would be. I desperately wanted to leave the train.Invitation to the Self My early dream record (from age 20 onward) is filled with the more typical aspects of abduction . Deciding to take action. many people who have only had sporadic abduction experiences a few times in their lives have never been able to make it past this point.

that there was a good chance these people were not human not only by their odd facial features. Another one of the Indians came up the hill toward me. just as suddenly as I had entered the train scene. and we found spots on the ground and sat together. I did not recognize anyone. I did not see the Indian approach from my left. He stopped to look up at me with a smile. so I just stood there. however. The crackling flames held my attention and soon filled my view. the sight of them made me feel more comfortable. At that time I was consciously aware that I was not in a normal dream state. landing in the fire without getting burned. He promptly spun and jumped back down the hill. nervously. I was standing outside on the top of a hill. I stood mesmerized as the wind carried swirling ash and smoke around my body. and quite seriously. and I let myself relax just a bit. That was quite confusing to me. The people in the engine room seemed to know me and called me by name. I quickly. He noticed that I was staring at the instruments and. I did know at this point. facing each other. but I was not afraid when I heard his voice. while the warm air lulled me into a trance-like state. "Hi Bonnie. For some reason. looking down at three "Indians" dancing around a fire at the bottom of the hill. exclaimed. asked if I would like him to "zap the zits off” my face. but also by their mannerisms. and I became entranced with watching him dance around in the flames.Operations the car." managing to put a smile of greeting on my face. I was unsure of what to do next. He was carrying what looked like a small bicycle air pump and a sewing needle. 19 . so I smiled back again. are you all right?" I turned to face him and cautiously replied with a "yes. He motioned for me to sit. Then. with a grin on his face. trying to get a grip on the new scenario.

throwing the blankets off and hurrying to examine the back of my leg was the first thing I thought to do upon waking. but since everything else in the room was smooth. 20 . I was just sitting upright on a hard. silvery-grey metal room. "Why are you doing that?" and he opened his eyes. Then he closed his eyes and began a soothing chant. I barely recall a window next to the bed that looked into another room. I blurted out. I was very nervous and wanted to leave badly." and he threw his head back in laughter." He resumed his captivating chant. Consciously. I curiously watched his face and listened to the sounds he was making. What really grabbed my attention was a tiny. Draped across me was the colorful afghan made by my grandmother and mother. I believe it was as well. There I saw a deep scar . startled but amused with me and calmly replied. odd-looking person sitting near the foot of the bed. I could not tell if it was male or female. It was lighter than the surrounding skin. and about four inches long. I woke in my own bed with a start and immediately sat up to look behind my right knee. I didn’t have time to examine the bed. twin-sized bed that was positioned against the wall of a that was not there when I had gone to "sleep" the night before. I had no clues from this experience that would lead me to believe that anything had happened to my leg. sunken in. but gradually thickening in the center to about half an inch. This gave me some comfort. polished metal. but certainly not enough to make me want to stay in that cold. not a thin line. It was fairly wide. but it appeared to be smiling at me.Invitation to the Self "No. and I soon found myself in yet another new situation. gifted to me. "Because it is time for it. sterile room. Nonetheless.

by pulling an "emergency brake. but it did not. However. dark eyes. Perhaps I found my own way there. it proved to be effective. The event was almost like an interruption of the 21 . the other "people" in the train car seemed empty. I was singled out from the rest of the group. which seemed as though it were just a type of background setting (a prop). and long black hair. They apparently hadn’t been planning for this. with dark skin. but it seems more likely that I was taken from my bed by an outside force. The reason I called them Indians was that they appeared to be of a Native American Indian descent." Trains have been associated with the symbolism some abductees/contactees have reported. My analysis of that experience goes something like this: Upon lying down on my bed to sleep. I was purposely put into an immediate state of confusion by all the commotion and activity going on in the "train car. trying to decipher the symbolism shrouded in cloudy memories was not a simple task. they were tall.Operations As you can imagine. or something I created on my own. Now…how the "Indians" came into it. like false images. certain patterns and symbols have become quite clear. I figured out a way to stop what was happening . I drifted into an alternate state of consciousness. which is typical in a visitation setting. after years of record keeping and analyzing the data. and some clearly perturbed star people came to haul me off. one way or another. I was then separated from my partner. The distraction of all the people and the thought of going to a concert should have excited me (I was a musician and a huge music fan) and kept my mind occupied. I knew that something very strange was going on. I am not sure. The "train" or UFO or "alien situation" came to a sudden halt." Whether this was an actual object already there. about 6 foot.

I did not feel that I could speak to other people about the visitations. The physical body was directly affected by what occurred on a different but parallel level of conscious existence. on some conscious level. sizes. in some dimensional space. I found myself meeting various types of star people. wearing blue overalls even. bearing children. doing what they had been told by someone else. What was actually much more believable to me was that some part of me. but their movements were robotic in nature. 22 . I would soon discover. They started to dominate my sleeping and waking moments. all different shapes. and have given me aid on numerous occasions. having "operations" and.Invitation to the Self alien visitation. and I was under the impression they were acting under orders. Some came to take skin samples from me. The “Indians” have always been very friendly towards me. I was getting implants. usually when I was in trouble and in need of help. which was actually the strangest of all. In October of 1988. I found it very hard to believe that I was physically taken from my bed and out of my house without disturbing anyone else." They were living. and mentalities. sentient beings. some did psychic testing with me. The scar that I quickly discovered on my leg upon waking is a physical mark. and they were becoming more and more frequent. Living day-to-day became quite interesting and difficult. was taken out of bed and had a chunk of flesh removed. and some just came to have a look. placed there by either the Indians on the hill or the small star people that were with me in the metal room. I went along with what they wished. I had an experience with some creatures I called "blue robots. What I do know is that I would see them again.

I had been standing in what was an information area . about 20 feet in diameter. I had free movement of my body. and even though I couldn’t be sure.Operations knowing what was expected of me without the use of speech.there were no seats or operating tables in this section of the room. which they had asked me to "keep my eyes on. and it is obviously not the whole truth). There were approximately six beings in my immediate vicinity and others running errands in other parts of the room. I knew they wanted to “operate” on me. they escorted me to a place on the opposite side of the room. I remained calm and patient. There was a circular indention in the floor. doing their work. I had picked up this bit of information by listening and observing. I stood still and watched while the little blue robots swarmed all around me. things became confusing to me. so when they were finished with that "information gathering" part of their work. outpatient type of procedure. only as tall as my waist. I was staring at what looked to me like the back of a television set. which somehow involved me. I was inside a circular metal room. they were just leading me. about 6 inches deep. aboard what seemed to be a spaceship. I asked them why I needed an operation and the response was that I had "pain" and they needed to fix it (this is a typical response that I have heard over and over again. They were communicating with one another and very busily running back and forth. Two of them helped me step down and turn so I was facing a wall. They asked me to step down into it and stand there. my head became dizzy and my vision was out of focus. I assumed it would be an easy." At that point. I had total freedom of movement. What I saw was a tool that was drilling into the back of 23 . more curious than afraid.

"Hey Doc. and I have to give him some credit. I would contact a magazine called Venture Inward published by the Association for Research and Enlightenment (the Edgar Cayce Foundation). which I sent a short letter to. as time 24 . hoping to hear from other “experiencers.can you take a look at it?" What I really wanted to say was. He tried to understand. The magazine had a pen pal section. we could talk about them until he became too uncomfortable and wanted to drop the subject. that's how life goes . I finally found some others to communicate with who made me feel a little less lonely. As I was saying. In the near future. and the operation was over. There was a loud BANG and a flash of light. sometimes. I went to a local doctor (a general practitioner) who said I had a cyst that could be removed with surgery. and as you can imagine. I would have felt pretty stupid walking into the doctor's office and saying to him. I answered every letter and. I had developed a lump in the same location on the back of my head. he could prescribe pain medication. if it bothered me. or I could just let it sit there and.Invitation to the Self the supposed television set. I then realized that the hole being drilled was not into the back of a television set. I was abducted by aliens about a week ago.people are ruled by their fear. I've got a lump there now .” I ended up hearing back from about 25 people who had either seen UFOs or had what they thought might have been an abduction experience. and they drilled a hole into the back of my head. "Could you please cut this alien implant out of my head?!" Unfortunately. but into the back of my head! Within the week. I didn't tell anyone except for my husband. I did not feel comfortable in telling anyone about the visitations. he was open to my experiences and.

ALL of 25 . I had gone to bed that night with no problems. this time standing in the center of the kitchen. I could better analyze the situation at a later time. I looked down the hallway to my bedroom and saw my bed sitting where it should have been. the more I tried to control my fear and collect information during actual visitations. Of course. although not realizing it right away. which was not normally the case. in my living room. but none of the lights worked. as I could see that it was very late at night. I suddenly thought to myself. I looked across the house and saw that the front door was wide open. I got up and flipped the light switch. as I always kept a night light on. One night that summer. enabling me to understand the best that I could what was occurring. I thought I was still in the physical world. I woke in an alternate reality. I also noticed that all the lights were off. The more contact I had with the star people. My bed was in there. "This happens all the time when they're here. This immediately alarmed me. I abruptly found myself "waking" once again. But now. Because I was able to do this. It took a good amount of willpower to stay calm and observe what was happening around me and to me. I went in and out of an alternate state of consciousness three separate times before the night was over. as I helplessly slipped from one strange scene to another. I was not always able to keep such calm control in circumstances when control was taken away from me." and I felt aggravated.Operations went on. with my entire family sleeping on it. I was confused and frightened. and I was concerned that someone might walk in. the numbers dwindled and I was left with about five consistent pen pals. with no worries in particular.

was holding a sort of "mirror" in front of me. which was very sore. I screamed and began swinging my arms to hit whatever was near me. "I don't know…I did it in my sleep. silently. which I was looking into. I knew then that this was how I could see every room at the same time.Invitation to the Self the lights in the house were on. That type of visitation was frightening and bothersome . everyday waking world. I was standing in the kitchen and distinctly felt a presence in the room. I can clearly recall the doctor’s concerned words. The next thing I remember is actually waking up the next morning in the normal. I tried unsuccessfully to rinse out the foreign object. I woke with a start (although I had never gone to sleep). I knew right away that something had happened to my eye. although I could see nothing. 26 . I felt it moving around me. "There's nothing there!" but I knew there was. which should have been impossible from where I was standing. saying. My husband suddenly appeared. but nothing ever emerged from my bloodshot eye. My heartbeat accelerated as I felt someone move close to me and I panicked. I then realized that someone. The pain persisted. an individual probably two foot shorter than me." I had to wear an eye patch for a week or so until it healed. and I paid a visit to the family doctor. I could barely even open it enough to see. "What the heck did you do to yourself?! There's a gouge taken out of your eye!" And all I could reply with was. Once again. for a third time.having no control and feeling as though I had been violated in some way. This time however. and I could see every room's light. The front door was wide-open and all the lights were off again. but never really knowing how. like I had an eyelash or something in there for a while and had been rubbing it.

I also recall having ovum removed from my body in more hospital-like surroundings. subconscious images and symbols aimed at the day’s events. I quickly replied. something that really stood out in my mind. but different states of consciousness or levels of reality. Most of the experiences I have recorded are not my typical. He was a friend of mine that I had known for a while. green park. which I recorded. For the most part. hoping the subject would never come up again. Some incidents were tolerable while others were unbearable. 27 .Operations Recalling my dreams was a practice that I had become rather good at after a few years. I was able to discern which dreams were simply normal. it was not unusual for something related to pregnancy to be thrown in. as he smiled and we flew further.” nonchalantly brushing it off. Some looked up and waved. Even during events that revolved around psychic testing and warnings of Earth Changes. My friend suddenly asked if I would like to be pregnant. normal dreams – the recorded dreams are what would be unusual for me. One of the first “pregnancy events” that happened went like this: I found myself floating through the air with a star person beside me. “No thanks. and which dreams were not actually dreams at all. That answer seemed to be okay with him. So many of the visitation experiences had to do with egg extraction or pregnancy “testing” that they actually became “normal” events. not right now. those times remain hidden in my mind. We floated past some stone buildings into a small town where other star people and humans were walking down a street and relaxing in a lush. but not in great detail. and I had the feeling that I knew some of them.

and quite visible. In a confused moment. I was in a mountainous area standing on a curvy. He said that I had been pregnant for 14 days and that I would have the baby in another 14 days. I had a new scar on the back of my right hand. They were running around. fertile.Invitation to the Self I recall an event in which a bunch of “little kids” were running around my house. There were about 20 of them. I was hearing someone run across the roof. What I could not figure out was why I had to get a scar on the hand for that…I mean. It was a straight. I really wanted to remember the patterns. Was that not noticeable to them? On another occasion. The picture I get is not of a warm. I made a visit to a doctor who told me I was pregnant. For some reason. thin line almost an inch long. but I do not recall what that individual looked like. children of a human and star person genetic makeup. I walked into the living room and was watching them when I noticed some very intricate patterns on an object resting on the coffee table. When I woke up the next morning. looking at things. In this alternate state of consciousness. I was watching flashes of light in the distance and then UFOs flying over. 28 . grabbing things. but there were no physical signs of pregnancy.” The next thing I knew. and knocking stuff over. they were all spending the night. I began to question how the star people go through the process of creating hybrids. I just happened to be on my menstrual period at the time. and they were wreaking the place. Then I suddenly became aware of a stinging sensation on my right hand – I had been given a “pregnancy test. I do not feel that there is anything beautiful about the way they create children. dirt road. The reality of this event scared me and made me wonder if I may have actually been pregnant. I went to the door and let whomever it was in. so I focused on them as long as I could.

who was running through the house in terror. So. locking all the doors and windows. to say the least. The fetus is taken away shortly thereafter when it is “ripe. standing behind the counter of the art gallery I worked in. one in which the local doctor lived nextdoor. At times. I kept quiet until the only customer left the gallery. went to the bathroom. “You invited them!” he screamed. I then locked the door.Operations glowing pregnant woman overjoyed about the life growing inside her. having a memory triggered by the pain in my ovary. Sometimes it took a few days to remember them. but he was hysterical. and I was trying to understand. The triggered memory led me to recall this event. I did not always recall events immediately. An image of lying on a cold table while three star people stared down at me popped into my mind. the picture I get is of a cold. I briefly woke up and wondered how it was possible that I just woke up twice! I sat up in my bed and looked down the hallway leading off from my bedroom. Well. and cried. “I don’t want any company coming over! It’s your fault!” he turned and glared with hurt eyes. At that point. confused by his fear. It was quite uncomfortable. perhaps the afternoon. I had flashbacks of a previous night's experience later in the day. one day while I was at work. I felt a sudden sharp pressure in my left ovary. I woke and hastily scrambled from the blankets to join my husband. For example. I anxiously followed him. At the far end of the 29 . My lower abdomen felt as though it had filled up with air and then all the air was sucked back out. standing over the cash register. “What’s wrong?’ I asked. sterile environment where a woman’s uterus is implanted and the child kept secret from her. I really didn’t know what he was talking about.” It is certainly not a method our human culture would find comfortable. there I was.

I remember thinking to myself. all experiences were not so easy to deal with. I don't really know why. Now. I must have been seriously “out of it. metal table having eggs sucked out of me by three star people was. and the movement reminded me of a swimming jellyfish.” because I was not alarmed whatsoever. I was unable to look down for further analysis. not terrifying. it's just a star person. At first. I slipped in and out of an altered state of consciousness that mirrored my normal. strangely. going in and out of waking consciousness. Here is one example: This event was very real and considerably traumatic for me. Unfortunately. 30 . I briefly left the scene. I have no more recollection of what occurred that night." as if that were perfectly acceptable. as though there were a connection between the movement of the lights and the soreness in my legs. It looked like it was filled with numerous small. or at least what I remember of it. my legs began to feel tingly and sore. immediately losing consciousness of the physical world. I was looking up at the night sky at what appeared to be a triangular-shaped UFO. Sitting on that chair was a figure in a black trench coat and hat. I returned to the altered state. waking world. there were actual "abductions" where I was forcibly taken from my house. It started pulsating. this time lying on the front seat of a car. On a few rare occasions. All night long. "Oh. I just seemed to be rather calm and quiet about the whole thing. My best guess as to what actually happened was that the star people had taken eggs from my ovaries. As I watched the pulsating of the lights.Invitation to the Self hallway was a chair. flat. Perhaps they used some type of calming technique to prevent me from kicking and screaming at the top of my lungs. Lying on a hard. and I lay back down. bright white lights.

I had no control over the situation. I instinctually knew that I was not seeing the whole picture. then I saw myself lying on my own bed and then sitting in a bathroom. and not seeing one during an extremely vivid visitation like this was very rare indeed. I quickly slipped from one situation to another. not helpful. both mentally and physically. my legs were slowly pulled away as though they were being stretched from my body. The woman was not truly concerned about me. My legs were pulled farther apart as the pain became more intense. I was completely paralyzed. Why were some visitations peaceful and interesting while others were 31 . in a mocking. I started to cry. The triangular-shaped light was still there and once again began pulsating. With every movement of the light. I looked over to one of the empty rooms across the hallway from her to see a large hand pointing to what appeared to be ancient writing on a stone wall. I reentered the original state and found myself in an underground building. no matter how hard I tried. walking around hallways and deserted rooms. that was clear. It said DECEIT. What I saw then was a screen memory (a false image used to cover up what was really happening) of a spider. She asked what was wrong and what had happened to me. Tears were fresh on my face as I rounded a corner and saw a human woman seated behind a desk in one of the small rooms. I was terrified. I never saw a star person in this entire experience. false sympathy. I felt that I could barely stand it. They were so tingly and sore. The pain became greater and I prayed for the ordeal to end. I was hurt from the previous episode. This time.Operations looking up at the night sky. The light pulsated in time with the yanking on my legs. Her motives were malicious in nature. and the throbbing pain was spreading into my lower groin area.

All the while I was standing in one spot. I stood motionless. in that experience there was absolutely nothing to feel good about. which prevented me from focusing properly. dancing and mingling as if it were quite normal having a dance club in my kitchen. The party scene changed a number of times. The thoughts made no logical sense. like the one on the train that attempted to keep my mind occupied. but it comes back to me now and again. filled with strange faces and the clamor of many voices. and I’m going to look at it now and share it with you. and the sign on the wall makes me wonder even more – was my subconscious mind trying to tell me something? The idea of being forcefully abducted by aliens was bad enough. I became totally confused. like there was a pressure building up behind them. it isn’t that easy. I said to my husband. This gathering was in my own kitchen. and nobody can say anything to make it any better. and it seemed we were both a bit perplexed about what was happening. and partygoers brushed by me. This is the type of event that one puts away in the back of the mind. pushing them forward. Unfortunately.Invitation to the Self purely terror? Well. until I had gone to three or more different parties. hoping to completely forget. My eyes felt strange. Sometimes. moving from one location to another. but it was just the beginning. and my vision was off as well. It started out at a party. I have one of those horrors that I’ve tried to bury. “Something isn’t right – I don’t feel like myself. It is another event that was very frightening and left me feeling helpless. but to have another human being treat me in such a fashion…. the bad feeling became more intense. My husband was near me. held in place by my confusion 32 .” As the party continued. nothing to rationalize the actions of whoever did that to me. an experience occurs that is quite terrifying.

I was becoming quite distraught.” over and over again. and I got the impression that it was meant to keep others out rather than keep me in – it wasn’t like I was struggling. a form of silent communication took place. something is wrong with my eyes. I was lying on my bed surrounded by three star people. My eyes hurt terribly and I was scared. in a vain attempt to escape the noise and confusion. 33 . but when I became fully conscious of the situation. and all the party people were still there. This is the only instance that I can recall being in a situation where the door was guarded. the “party” was still in progress. and another male was guarding the bedroom door. I felt that she needed to do something.” She appeared to be concerned and somehow sad. hoping to finally receive some sympathy.Operations and despair. “This isn’t me. One male was standing near the foot of the bed. I looked up at her. as if they were examining a frightened animal. I vaguely recall deciding to walk into my bedroom. As the female made eye contact with me. I confided in her. They were a bit taller and wider than the female. A female sat next to me on the bed. to anyone that walked by and to myself. I was with strangers in a strange place. I suddenly became aware of standing in my own kitchen once again. “This isn’t me…this isn’t me. My husband was now gone from the scene and no one else listened to my cries. anyway. I kept saying aloud. afraid of what I was feeling. She was pale and thin with comparatively small black eyes that focused on me with a sense of pity. and my vision was blurry and my eyes were sore. In the rest of the house. not understanding what was happening around me. Knowing that she felt empathy for me. a job of some sort that I would not like.

taking on new form…growing. slanted. bulging from their sockets. “Will my face run off onto the floor? How will I breath? Or eat? Will I stay this way forever?” Afraid that my eyes would stream out of my head like 34 . Screams of horror filled the tiny room as my grotesquely misshapen face bled into a new. and I still have trouble thinking about it. swiftly felt around for something. My eyes were becoming very “alien-like” – it appeared as though my face were transforming into a new shape. almonds. thin “probe” in her hand. Normally. two male star people were dragging me into the bathroom. They were very strong. The two star people forced me to look into the mirror. maybe because I do not want them to be…. but instead went forward with her task. but it just so happened that my eyes and the rest of my face appeared to be melting off. with warm liquid flowing from them like someone had turned on a faucet. if you can imagine that. and I believe these were the same two from the bedroom. They were quite tall. The next thing I knew. gripping me tightly by the arms. like I had never thought of doing before. Fear gripped me as I wondered somewhere in the back of my mind where human nature still existed…. this part was even worse than the bedroom scene. I knew what was coming and I hoped it would be over with quick. She held a long. elongated shape. and my eyes were becoming huge. They were as bloodshot as they could possibly be. Well.Invitation to the Self She did not answer my plea for help. Now. She gently inserted this probe into me. The specifics of this event are not clear to me. about 6-foot-5 or so. and then pulled it back out. and never even knew was possible. I cried and wailed as my eyes widened and stretched. I screamed at the top of my lungs. standing on either side of me. This happened over 14 years ago. this isn’t difficult to do.

I was relieved to see that my face looked normal except for being red from crying. Still. bouncing back and forth until I had no strength left in me. I was very cautious. Just as the female star person felt empathy for me. When I look back at this information. I kicked and screamed. “That’s not me! That’s not me!” as my face and eyes became so ugly.Operations punctured egg yolks. for some time. forcing me to see myself in the mirror. and my eyes were sore. I poured all of my hate into the mirror. and I kept crying for a while. possibly for my own good. My pillow was drenched. During the mirror trial. trembling. but they held on. the worse it became. The more I screamed. I thrashed wildly as hatred jumped the 12 inches from my face to the mirror. so far past my normal boundary of strength that I was now on autopilot. and when I did. I fought with reserves that seemed unreal. I hated seeing that face so much. There was no more rational thought. lashing out to make those two let go of me. almost lifeless. I hated them and I hated myself. I was crying and shaking when I woke up. but they would not. and I know I kicked them good. fear flowed from my very pores and turned to anger. as my soul piercing cries shattered the glass and I woke in my bed. I lay there. the two male star people were not trying to be mean to me. There was a silent communication that told me they were doing this for a reason. I screeched and wailed. so grotesque. that as I screamed. They were not happy about holding me and making me face myself in the mirror. I try to find something that makes sense. so did 35 . as though my reflection might jump out and grab me. It took about an hour before I could get up and bring myself to look into the bathroom mirror.

whether it was planned or not. and this is supposedly done with good intentions. New thoughts have recently come to my mind about this incident. was that I faced my fears that night. One thing that happened for sure. I couldn’t understand why the star people would feel concern for me and at the same time put me through all that emotional turmoil. Well. Then I thought about wild animals that scientists capture. it was emotionally draining. Here is an early visitation in which I did have control and had the option of having a visit or not: In one of the earliest records. some part of myself that I did not like. I saw something in that mirror. I had poured out so much anger and hate. The following day. I have an intriguing occurrence that needs telling. Please keep in mind that I had been seeing the star people since I was a young child. I felt like an angel. I tried everything to avoid seeing it. but I managed to live through it. tag and let go. do tests on. I am not sure. what are the helpless animals thinking and feeling after being shot with tranquilizers and dragged around in a strange environment? I believe this is a similar situation and one that I can use to help me understand my experience better. If I look at the overall picture of that night. but I had blocked that memory from 36 .Invitation to the Self these two. Whether this was due to their friendliness toward me. my relationship with the star people was interesting in that I usually had my own free will and could basically do what I wanted. there was an emptiness that needed filling – and I filled it with love. For a long time. or my own ability in making it so. and I hated confronting it. As I have already mentioned. That experience was a rare one where I was forced to do things I didn’t want to.

but I waved just in case it was the star people. I was still groggy from sleep. At first. In this experience. the more “cartoon-like” the noises became. anyway). listening intently. so I got up to let her out. I spoke out loud to them. but I’d heard these sounds before – the star people sometimes make them. staring at the backdoor. It’s rather difficult to explain. Around 5 a. “Maybe my friends actually came to see me…I can’t see them 37 . I was standing in the hallway at the time. Shortly thereafter. I started hearing extremely bizarre noises. Early in the evening. After lying there for a while. and they happened so quickly. as it seemed the voice was inside my head…so I wondered if my mind was playing tricks on me or if I was just making it up. I heard a voice whispering to me. but the voice kept talking. I couldn’t get back to sleep. I woke to hear my cat meowing loudly. got under the covers and just lay there.Operations my adult mind for some time. As I opened the door. I crawled back into bed. but the more I listened. hoping they would hear.m. I listened carefully to see what I could make of it. I thought it was the cat jumping around or possibly raccoons getting into the trashcans. and I thought to myself. I felt a longing to see my star friends. it was hard to decipher. and I thought it was probably a plane. She was sitting in the hallway. thinking about what I could do to call them to me. I saw a tiny white light in the sky above the house. but I could only hear the sounds every now and then. I did know that telepathy was a form of communication they used. I began to wonder if the star people were trying to contact me. Figuring that anything was worth a try. and nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary (so far. This startled me quite a bit. I seem to have recalled my connection with them and actually called them to visit. I went to bed as usual that night.

my muscles tense.” Then the voice said to me. “Please help me go to sleep. tried every which way to get comfortable and sleep. but saw nothing out of the ordinary. whether it was my own subconscious mind or if there actually was a separate entity involved. I didn’t know what to expect. heart pounding.” So I went to the backdoor. “I will try. they could see me. possibly the star people that I had spoken to earlier in the night. but it’s hard to sleep when you guys are making all that noise!” I had my eyes fixed on the back door. I’d be too scared for that. I directed another thought to the voice.” and forced myself to sit up and look out the window. “You have to go to sleep.” The voice was still there and it replied. I couldn’t make any sense out of it anyway. I went back to bed and soon the weird cartoon noises started up once again.Invitation to the Self while I’m awake…can I? No. I tossed and turned. “No. In a feeble attempt to acquire some peace. so I could get some rest. someone was speaking to me.” I made a sincere effort to let 38 . but I was unsuccessful. those noises came from the cat. “Why don’t you look out your window?” and I replied. “Are you scared?” Then I felt like I was being put to the test so I bravely said.” I thought about what was occurring and weighed my options. I replied. Either way. “I’m just making this up. but I could not see them. thinking they were getting ready to walk right in. She came running in. I don’t want to. The voice asked. “I know. I scanned the yard and sky. I saw nothing unusual. Then I suddenly went into a state of denial and thought. but I knew I was wasting time with voices in my head. “Why should I?” There was a brief silence and then. ready for it to fling wide open. I came to the conclusion that if someone was out there. At that point I just wanted the noises to stop. opened it and called the cat.

Then. thinking that I might as well just get up since it was almost morning anyway. but they were not getting it quite right. I must have glanced at them at one point. I thought to myself that the star people were trying to help me go to sleep. I did not see them with my eyes. looking around the room. I kept my eyes open to watch the amazing transformation. I lay there staring at the ceiling. and quite unexpectedly I might add. Suddenly. Three small star people were pulling me out of bed. dragged by my head and shoulders toward the floor. I looked toward the bed and saw myself lying there…I was no longer in my physical body. I felt myself being pulled out of the bed. but could feel them there.Operations my muscles relax. being wide-awake while this was happening. and the room was just 39 . in fact. think of something soothing. I WAS NOT ASLEEP! What I did not realize at the time was that I was being pulled into an alternate reality. It felt so real to me. my body seemed to be dozing off…the only problem was that my eyes were still wide open! I didn’t feel tired at all. I was very alert. I felt as though I were going into a trance-like state. without warning. However. thinking that it was absolutely crazy. Being the inquisitive individual that I am. but it wasn't working. as my arms and legs began to lose muscle control and my body went limp. and all the time I knew that I was the only one who could hear them. Sirens began to wail in my mind. I turned my head toward the window and saw little red lights. I was moving my head. because I remember seeing that they were a glowing yellow color. and permit myself to drift off. There was just too much anxiety at that point. which I could have done. but I was consciously aware of my surroundings. I let the experience take me instead of fighting it off. They got louder and louder.

Everything seemed to be back to normal for a few minutes. I don’t want to go! I’m bringing myself out of this!” I pushed so hard. Every now and then. On one of these occasions. by sheer force of will. And the star people also came to know this of me. No matter who it was. when I knew the star people would be coming weeks beforehand. I yelled at them. setting it up at the end of the hallway. I decided to set up my video camera and tape myself sleeping throughout the night. “What’s going on? Why are they pulling me out of my bed? I don’t like this. “One who pesters! You were bothering me!” The rest of my sleep time was quiet and restful. I would find this information in dreams and visions. I would have complete control. until I heard strange sounds again and a voice that asked. “You know. I was fortunate enough to know about a visitation ahead of time. if I could harness my own inner will and strength. you guys are pests!” I immediately snapped out of the “trance-like state” and was once again lying in my bed. pointing directly toward where I would be lying in the bedroom. to speak aloud. and one of them was waving goodbye to me. Not only did I want to see if my physical body moved from the bed. 40 . I also wanted to capture the star people on videotape! I prepared the equipment. and sometimes from spirit friends who guided me. but I managed to get to sleep that night. “What is a pest?” I saw a vision of their craft in the sky above the house as it was flying away.Invitation to the Self as I had seen it through physical eyes only moments before. I had great expectations and was fairly nervous. I answered. and I was respected for it. I came to the understanding that I always had a choice.

Suddenly. to tell him there was someone at the door. a lovely older star lady stood before me. away from the house. but I had forgotten most of the event. which brought me to a full waking state. a thought came to mind . Apparently still in the alternate state of consciousness. When I opened the door. I slipped back into the visitation. They averaged a height of 3-foot and prominent black eyes. disappointed that I had not gotten a clearer look at the star people. At that point. I slumped over on the bed. I glanced toward the foot of my bed and saw little yellow sparks and heard what I termed a "magic wand" noise (maybe something I'd heard on a cartoon). V-shaped craft flying upward. I believed myself to be coming into consciousness. I tried to wake my husband. Judging by the way I felt and how aware I was of my surroundings. I decided to look out the window for any sign of unusual activity. After a few minutes of being awake. just curious. She was like no one I had ever seen before. A knock sounded on the side door. When I pulled open the curtain and peered out. I was not scared at all. Dejectedly. but he grouchily said. and I felt a cold chill run up my spine.the star people had come for a visit. "so what"…so I got up by myself and answered the knock. I saw three red. I felt as if I had 41 . As I became refocused in the new state of consciousness. I was cognizant of numerous small beings running through the front rooms of the house.Operations The star people actually showed up on time. A small star person came up from the back of the video camera and promptly turned it off! I then heard a loud banging sound on the roof. I sat upright in the bed and looked down the hallway. close to the bedroom. However. two of the V-shaped craft turned back to land in the yard.

I was not clear on what she was saying. This was a groundbreaking event for me. so she came back to see me. and I was sorry to see her go. now to the part I'm sure you are wondering about . but she seemed to be very pleased with me. She was clothed in loose. with a matching cloth scarf wrapped around the top of her head. She told me that she'd heard me thinking and knew I was cold. I never saw myself sit up on the videotape. She went on to say that she was “very proud" of me. or my sitting up happened in another state of existence in which I was very close to waking consciousness. almond-shaped eyes. Okay. She was short and chubby with small. jet black. the tape resumed and the sound of my neighbor’s barking dogs was heard in the background. After 20 seconds or so. I sat down in front of the television and watched the videotape nonstop. It made me question how it was that I could consciously recall sitting up during the night.did the video camera catch anything? Not much. What I can deduce from this is two possibilities: either I sat up while the camera went to static (which really wouldn’t have given me enough time). cotton-looking robes of various colors. The camera went dead. She went on to talk about electricity and how I had affected some of the things in the house with my energy. and the screen filled with static. There was no activity on the tape except for one small spot that lasted roughly 30 seconds.Invitation to the Self known her forever. there was a kind of "wet breathing" sound that lasted approximately five seconds. but 42 . This is what I witnessed: every now and then I rolled from side to side. I was popular with the star people because I had a certain type of energy. just as if I were sleeping normally. At that point on the tape. and her bright smile gave me comfort. In the morning.

many things that happened during the visitations that were difficult to explain. Our Western culture has been conditioned to believe that if an event does not happen physically. This is so for everyone. I had to come up with a term for where the events were taking place. That was just the beginning of my query. events that occur in other levels of the conscious mind have meaning and worth just as material events do. I have named the multitude of non-physical levels of conscious awareness the “alternate reality. Besides the fact that translating an experience from the alternate reality into physical terms is quite difficult. I have come to the understanding that reality transcends the physical. It is a spiritual concept that transcends space and time. this is where the visitations take place – in the alternate reality.Operations the videotape did not show any evidence of it. It really made me start to wonder about the possibility of how I could wake up in the morning with physical scars on my body. the encounters have been shrouded in symbolism and filled with what can only be termed “alien culture” recalled in fragments. These events that occur in various levels of consciousness are very much as real and valid as any material event. There were many. Whatever happens on these other levels of awareness affects the physical world and vice versa. if the star people had not physically taken me out of bed and put the marks on me. In order for me to comprehend what was happening with the star people and the visitations. 43 .” The alternate reality is a general term for various levels of consciousness and states of mind. and believe me. then it is not real. other than the normal physical consciousness. it has not been an easy one to understand. For the most part.

I do not know what the connection is. when I dream of a bulbous-headed deer with large black eyes or a two-foot long spider. For example. For me. some nights I longed for regular sleep. I didn’t look. somewhere very close by. Sometimes. but that did not prevent the event from 44 . Sometimes it can be difficult enough to recall visitations at all. either because a traumatic event was too much to handle and purposely buried by the self. but then I thought better of it. So.Invitation to the Self Add to this the fact that many experiencers are disoriented when near the star people. Then there are "screen memories" . I thought that I might look out the window to see the owls. I have come to find that when I hear an owl in the evening. the memory does not always bring the order of events back right away. owls. not just by appearing in screen memories. The most frequently used false image (over-used to the point of obviously being fake) is the spider! In other words. owls have “alerted” me to the possibility of visitation. In many ways. not wanting to “bring on” a visitation. and they are unfamiliar with the territory.images or thoughts that are remembered instead of the actual event. however. I consider the owl to be a helpful guide. I get suspicious! Owls have made a huge impact on my life. some screen memories have been small animals such as cats. I am not pleased when all I remember from a night’s experience is the vision of an owl…but this also alerts me and tells me to look deeper for hidden memories. but it is there. rabbits. but by entering my waking world as well. or because the star people covered it up. On more occasions than I can count. one evening I heard two owls hooting outside my bedroom window. there is a good probability I will have a visitation. and even larger animals like deer. but when they are remembered.

I looked out the window and saw a huge owl staring back at me. I realized there must have been something going on. Perhaps I was becoming tired of being “lied” to. This made me quite upset. to not come at all.m. This of course. about 3:00 a. “I don’t appreciate having screen memories!” I told them that they no were no longer allowed to take eggs from me. and they would be held accountable for their actions. “It’s just an owl. One morning in particular. I decided to let those star people have it. much more than usual. I began yelling at them. probably because it just didn’t compute. which was quite abnormal for me. for some reason. the whole universe would know about it. The more I thought this over the following day. was unusual for me. the more and more I came to realize that I had experienced a screen memory. like I had a bruise. I could recall no dreams whatsoever upon waking. and if they did. my mind quickly tried to analyze the picture. etc. so I tried to remember anything at all (a feeling. Well. I went on to say that if they were going to visit secretly. a fleeting glimpse of a memory. and the idea I came up with was that maybe it was just a big cat…. I am talking BIG. I was a bit confused. no more recollection.” and that was it. which were glowing yellow! For some reason.). In the end. I recall thinking.Operations occurring. 45 . I had no recollection of any dreams that night. That was not always the case.. but I never did figure it out. slanted eyes. it had large. I checked it out and found a brand new scar. my left arm felt sore. I suddenly recalled waking in the very early morning. The next morning. and hearing owls hooting outside. hoping they could hear me. like 3-foot tall! Not only was it enormous.

46 . and I believe these are the same ones that came to see me when I was 11 years old.” After apologizing profusely and making sure that I felt better. My whole family and I were sitting in the living room of our house. I can remember thinking that these two were very “clean and straightforward. the extraction of ovum halted and the screen memories became few and far between. These star people were tall and slender with fairly normal (human-sized) heads and eyes. and they were sorry to have made me feel that way. I watched as it approached. These were “representatives” sent to apologize to me. noticing that the movement was slow and deliberate.Invitation to the Self Two nights later. From that moment on. and lightcolored skin. as the two star people instantly appeared standing side by side in my living room. I could see two star people standing inside the ship in front of a large window. a UFO flew slowly across the field toward my house. the representatives took off. I have built a friendly relationship with this “species” of star people. The room filled with an orange glow. waiting. They said that they did not realize I was uncomfortable.

Visitation Part Two hybrids 47 .

looking surprisingly like a hard plastic. As I stood there on the slope. The other one had no visible lighting and was larger. muddy mountainside not far from the summit." I got a warm. all five senses working overtime. What happened that night would set a precedent for visitations that followed . I started off standing on a wet. probably about 20 feet in diameter. When I say hybrid. They quietly flew up to the top of the mountain and out of my sight. it would not surprise me if a hybrid was created with a conglomeration of genetic material from a number of different entities. friendly feeling from them. all covered with tall clumps of grass and trees. I smiled and waved as the ships flew over. I was consciously awake for a good part of this experience." I believe I referred to it that way because of the strong feelings of love and family I was immersed in. There were other mountains close by. telling me to rethink my whole worldview. with black and grey coloring. two UFOs slowly flew over. That one in particular seemed very familiar to me. One was a small. I am referring to a person who has a mixture of human and star person genetics – it does not always seem to be a half and half mix. I excitedly took off after them. So this gives them an interesting and varied look…. They both tilted back and forth onto their sides slightly. so much so that I knew I had a connection with these star people and had definitely seen them before. It was a clear night. In fact.the sheer reality of it screaming in my face. slipping 48 . but was disoriented at times. light-colored disc with multicolored lights encircling the edges. but more like some DNA got switched around here and there. I suppose to say "Hello. stars shining.Invitation to the Self One of my first conscious experiences with the hybrid people occurred when I was 21 years old. I found myself in a place that I called "home.

I grabbed a clump of grass and caught myself. come on!” so I ended up walking toward the voice and leaving the building. star people. He smiled and said. He looked almost completely human. standing there with a gaping grin on my face. My memory blanks out there." He invited me to the white building. I was completely in awe. and beyond them stood a white. but I had never seen one face to face. It must have been a fascinating sight for them as well. They all seemed to be friendly. From the reading I had done. Breath came in short spurts as I ran for the parked UFOs. I briefly sat at a table with a male hybrid who had striking green eyes and jet-black hair. but someone was calling me from a side door. managing to stumble my way over the top. I gladly accepted the invitation. I expected a 49 . and there was no one guiding me. so I looked for a friendly face. I wanted to stay and talk. soon we will be introduced to the Earth. "Do not worry. hands and legs covered in mud. Now I could see that the two ships had landed. but then he turned right and I turned left as we went our separate ways. and smiled and greeted me as they passed. star people that looked like humans. It was truly amazing. They kept coaxing me to "come on.Hybrids and losing my balance in the mud. in which there was a "party" of some sort going on. landing on my knees. Their doors opened and an array of people came out: humans. We entered the building together. The party was more like a family reunion boasting all shapes and sizes of people. but I could sense that something was different. A third UFO landed nearby. I stood and stared open-mouthed as a star person exited the craft and approached me. and the hybrids. one-story building made of brick. I already had the knowledge of the existence of hybrids. I didn’t know what to do.

being the first one of its kind. I had that feeling of being in a loving environment. after this. whether they were star person. Also. While I was just beginning to develop some sort of a sense of where I stood with the visitations. The hybrids I have seen. was a real shocker for me – during the event. but some with larger than normal eyes and paler skin. Light colored hair seems to prevail. I have the feeling this was my introductory experience with the hybrids because. The thought that I had some type of connection with these people was frightening. every hybrid I have met has had a pleasant demeanor. How could that be? I didn’t remember them. I was completely aware of my surroundings. The first ones I met were already strong adults. casually talking and strolling by as if everything were normal. but I had a feeling I had been around these people before.Invitation to the Self hybrid to be a small. even though it felt good to be there. I gawked openly as people of various sizes and colors passed me. human. What really scared me was the idea that it WAS normal. They very much had the appearance of being human. a new pattern of events came 50 . No one was offering any explanations and I. generally unhealthy child. of course. was too dumbfounded to ask. This experience. and I was free to explore. but I have seen dark brown and black hair as well. I was confused and amazed and left to ponder the possibilities over in my mind. however. and nothing that I experienced or witnessed made me feel otherwise…it was just the fact that I was mingling in a crowd of interplanetary guests! Many of the people. These were not deformedlooking. frail. I would see hybrid people again in group settings and one on one. weak-looking. however. have all been strong and healthy. grotesque monstrosities. or hybrid already seemed familiar to me.

I parked the car and walked through airplane hangars and other types of buildings until I came to a structure that seemed to be the center of attention. did not accept it because.Hybrids flowing out of my mind to fill the pages of my dream journal. Airplanes and helicopters flew across the sky. and an announcement broadcasted over the radio. 51 . There were so many. a man in uniform walked in and found me there but was not really surprised to see me. I knew something must have been going on.” so I followed him. all headed for the base. All the local people wanted to know what the commotion was. I turned on the car radio to hear some tunes. The road was filled with heavily laden Army trucks. for one thing. Trucks pulled up and soldiers were walking about. “Come with me. I got in my car and started driving over that way to check it out. they were headed in the wrong direction. hidden from view. The public was informed that the Army trucks were simply delivering toys to the elementary schools in the area. As I was snooping. during aware states of consciousness. I drove over to the NASA base and went inside the gates. however. One night I had a vivid dream about a nearby NASA base swarming with activity. He led me outside to a cleared field that was surrounded by trees. I was looking for any information I could find. Many times. the government having some kind of connection with the star people. I was in the presence of military personnel including Army and Air Force. so a conference was held at the town hall. The people accepted this ridiculous explanation and went about their business. I carefully snuck inside and worked my way into a back room. I. Being the inquisitive individual I am. These new experiences involved the government and. strangely. He smiled and said.

I decided to give it a chance. The man escorted me over to an area off to the side that I can’t remember too well. I did not particularly feel a connection to this child. I stood there in sheer disbelief. There seemed to be little claws growing from the fingertips. and the teeth were definitely sharp. but then thought. I did not want to sit down 52 . it’s not human. “Well. what is this thing?” was my first impression. completely dumbfounded.Invitation to the Self A UFO had landed in the field and brought “babies” with it. climbing. for the most part. The baby appeared to be human. I let the child walk over and climb up onto the swing. in some reality. As I held the child in my arms. but I could tell without the shadow of a doubt that something was not right. just a responsibility for it while I was there. so maybe that’s how alien children grow…really fast. the fact of the matter is. I quickly noticed that it was growing! I started to panic. I thought it was going to bite me! I was scared but intrigued at the same time. Why the UFO came to the NASA base. as the child grew from an infant to about seven or eight years of age. I knew there would be a bad storm and that I would have to get the child and go inside. my attention was completely drawn and focused on the little newborn star people. not flat-edged. I woke up. to walking. as if I were babysitting.” convincing myself that this might be normal in some fashion. At that point. I walked over to a swing set that had been built just for the arrival of these babies. It had never really and truly occurred to me what the ovum extractions had been for…actually. What I do know is that he placed a baby in my arms and then backed off. It went from lying in my arms and not being able to hold up its own head. “Oh my God. I have no idea. and swinging! I heard rumbling coming from the sky and looked up to see dark clouds approaching.

I instinctively looked up to see a UFO hovering above the tree line. however. There was no escaping it. even though I wanted to. but I did not permit myself to think about it. bringing my eyes to rest on a large washtub filled with bubbles and containing one chubby baby. I did not. but I had been thrown into this setting quite unaware of anything. I was giving this baby a bath. I could not completely block these thoughts from my mind. because I was living it! During one visitation. especially having a baby. It was as if they wanted to set this impression in my mind and leave me with it.” someplace that I didn’t even understand. I was under the distinct impression that this was supposed to be MY baby. or know how to get to? These were not rational thoughts. Apparently. I was standing on a wooden deck attached to the back of my house. and they were not something that I could deal with at that time. The strange thing was. Of course. watching me. 53 . having no support system. My hands held a washcloth covered in warm water and bubbles that dripped down my leg. I woke from the scene and recorded the experience. Unfortunately. My memory picks up with soapy water spilling across the wooden planks. How could I let myself ponder the idea that I was producing offspring that were automatically being taken away from me and brought to some far away place? Let alone. It appeared to be completely human. How could I ever imagine that I had children living among the “stars. One thing is for sure – the star people are relentless observers. being raised by people who were not human? I did not often bring those thoughts to the surface of my mind.Hybrids and analyze that data. I knew what the star people were doing. feel a connection to the child.

Invitation to the Self Two months later. He said to me. took care of the house. You might be wondering where my husband was during these times of duress. It was the same baby from the previous experience! I later got the impression that this was a child of mine. The last time I entered this state during the course of the night. I could feel them all around. lying in my bed. terribly frightened. one that lived with the star people. cared for my young daughter. most of the time he was sleeping on the couch. It was not a good relationship. it scared me. Going into what I can best describe as a consciously aware state of alternate existence. and each time I found myself in the same alternate state. I suppose the fact that aliens visited me didn’t help matters. Sometimes he was there with me.. and I stayed awake for the rest of the night. slender. I did this over and over again. I still really do not know for sure. At that time in my life. I worked a full-time job at an art gallery. As you can imagine. and was a charter member and vice-president of community development for the 54 . “You and your family are very important to us. I screamed and woke up. there was a tall. he did not want to be bothered. star person standing in the bedroom doorway. but quickly fell back to sleep. Well. or had not gotten home from a night out with his friends. I woke myself up. so close that it seemed I could feel their breath on my skin. an extremely disturbing visitation occurred. It was about 3 a.m. I just didn’t wake him. but I could not see them. I became cognizant of the fact that the star people were very closely watching me. I turned to look behind me and saw the baby boy lying next to me. asleep. because when I had before. but it certainly was not the only reason behind our eventual divorce a year later.” He nodded toward the bed.

so assumed it was just my own feet lumbering through. after a Jaycees meeting at a friend’s place. My first thought was that two frogs were hopping alongside. but I couldn’t quite tell if it was an actual hopping or a dragging sound. but I am afraid I will step on you. except for the fact that truly weird stuff happened to me at night.m. at ground level on both sides of me. I had been offered a ride. but it was fairly black. My way to deal with it was to record the data and attempt to analyze it. One evening. I stopped once again to get a better listen.Hybrids local Jaycees. 55 . so did the sound. My next thought was that perhaps there were two snakes flanking my sides. I began to hear dried leaves rustling nearby me. I wanted to take my time and enjoy the evening air. so I stopped to listen. I continued my walk and heard the sound once again. I picked up my feet and looked closely to see if I was dragging something with me – perhaps a small branch. I proceeded forward and the rustling of leaves on either side of me was quite loud and obviously not my own feet. “I don’t mind if you walk with me. It was a cool autumn night and I could make out houses through the leafless woods as I approached. Okay…the explanations I was coming up with were not making much sense. to try and make some sense of it. I halted in my tracks and said. I began to make the trek back to my house. but when I stopped. I realize that. I strained to see in the darkness. and I lived right on the other side of the thin woods. I lived my daily life as normally as any person would. I believe it was around 9:30 p. now clearly not my own feet. I heard nothing. to the invisible whatever.” Once again I resumed my trek and the noises were no more. As I jumped the ditch and stepped into the wooded area. but it was a nice night in a quiet neighborhood.

asking personal questions about my life. I finally brought myself to tell mom and dad about the visitations. I broke down crying in his office. but I saw nothing else. At that point. Calling them “alien” was just the easiest way to get the basic idea across. suggesting an immediate hysterectomy. After separating from my husband in 1990. they had no concept of what I was trying to say. At first. I explained to him that I desperately wanted to have another child. My father’s biggest question was “How do you know they’re aliens?” I attempted to explain that they definitely were not humans. They listened intently and tried to understand what I was going through. He tried earnestly to console me. Regardless. my parents concluded that I was having a “metaphysical experience. they just were not of this planet! I didn’t even try to go into the possibility of them existing in another dimension. I went into my house and related the episode to my husband. 56 .Invitation to the Self Shaking my head in wonder and giving a short laugh. and that was good enough for me. and having no one else to talk to.” which was okay with them. I left the woods and came into the clearing where my house was located. a pre-cancerous condition was discovered in my cervix. I had plenty of spare time to sit and think. After many tears. I stopped to look at the sky. to see if there was any other information to be gathered. The gynecologist sadly gave me the news. there was a bright flash above the roof of my house. who listened in awe but had no explanation. I do not recall a visitation that night. While I was in the transitionary phase of not having a male partner. I spent a good deal of time alone or with my parents and my daughter. they didn’t act like humans. I can never thank them enough for the support they have shown me. they didn’t look like humans.

The doctor and I decided to try a simple surgery that would attempt to remove the abnormal cells from the cervix. He was not very hopeful however. I spent a good deal of time crying and praying. and caring. and in all seriousness advised me to find a man and get pregnant within the next six months. having done quite a bit of research and study on the subject already. After being together for a mere two-month period. I desired to give birth to my second and last child. A second operation was attempted a few months later. hoping to catch it before it spread any further. I was still alone. The condition was becoming more severe and was spreading rapidly. We have always discussed my visitation experiences in-depth. and I had to do it in a hurry. The surgery date for the hysterectomy was set. and had almost given up on the chances of having another child. I told him all about the visitations right away and he was very accepting of the whole thing.Hybrids hoping to come up with valid suggestions. preferably with a man I was in love with. Luckily for me. It was like a miracle. I was 23 years old at the time. I had no partner and no hopes of reuniting with my former husband. when I met Bryan in 1991. was unsuccessful. Bryan was thoughtful. I did not want to waste any time getting into this relationship. also without positive results. and he has always been understanding and supportive. However. From the start. which took place only a month later. if you know what I mean. my wish came true. The first surgery. We had discussed the details in-depth. and then a third. loving. Bryan and I decided to commit to each other and make this dream a reality. He was very interested in metaphysical experiences and the paranormal. what mattered more than anything at 57 . both knowing that neither one of us was financially stable.

There were a number of “nurses” preparing instruments around two tables that had been pushed together. 58 . Bryan invited me to his house for dinner. “Don’t worry. Bryan. he had whipped up a wonderful dish of Chicken Parmesan that we enjoyed thoroughly. bringing our legs together as one. this will be just like last time. side by side. candlelit table for two. The head nurse looked familiar. The nurses performed a short procedure with these skin samples to test our “compatibility. He had decorated the room beautifully. During our weeks of discussions. A few nights later. seated at a round. and she proceeded to wrap cloth straps around my right leg and Bryan’s left leg. We looked dreamily into each other’s eyes. Being the excellent chef that he is. We did this.Invitation to the Self that point was bringing my second child into the world. the nurse relayed to me that the results were positive.” What I vaguely recall at that point is Bryan and I both having a small slice of skin taken from each of our legs. There was no threat of harm. shiny metal room. thinking about the conversations we had been having of spending our lives together. I came to consciousness in a small. so I went along with what was asked of us. Smiling. This would be the night I would conceive my second child. Bryan was quiet and cooperative. she looked over toward me and said. I was approached by who I assumed to be the head nurse. She asked us to climb onto the tables and lie down. accompanied by my new partner. with candles glowing in all the corners and soft music playing in the background. and I wasn’t sure if he was fully aware of what was happening. and she apparently knew me already.” With a very delighted tone of voice and a smile. I experienced a visitation.

so did the rest and relaxation. Did it have something to do with the visitations and the alien experiments? I am sure there was more activity going on than I was able to consciously recall on my own. According to my dreams. congratulating me and encircling me with a protective energy that would remain throughout my pregnancy. Happiness was bursting from inside me.Hybrids I cannot accurately describe the energy created that evening. but all the same. but I was growing and learning. and I felt reborn. The night was beautiful and new. my experiences were changing. I was laughing heartily and swaying back and forth on my feet. making it difficult for conception to take place. I did not consume any alcohol during the night.” since three large scoops had already been taken from my cervix. therefore. my uterus ridden with full-blown cancer. I have often wondered what caused this condition to begin in the first place. Eventually. I felt as if I were drunk. I became used to being around the hybrids and different types of star people. as Bryan and I walked down the street laughing together. Nine months later. but I do not know the answer to that question. healthy baby girl . As soon as the pregnancy ended. The doctor considered my pregnancy to be “miraculous. the visitations had practically come to a miracle baby. I gave birth to a beautiful. I was given a rest and was being protected from any negative experiences. The visitations resumed as usual. What I do know is that during my pregnancy. I can only say that when I walked out of that house. It was not uncommon for me to be in a 59 . like I had never felt before. Everyone was happy and looking forward to a healthy delivery. I immediately underwent a hysterectomy. and it was most definitely contagious. Spinning around me was a “tornado” of spirit friends.

I figured out that when I got close to the UFO. going about their business or just getting together for some kind of “social. One craft floated off to my left in the distance. saw two UFOs. the bottom door opening and closing. and it chilled my bare feet.Invitation to the Self large room filled with a conglomeration of people. not surprisingly. They were holding each other closely and silently observing the UFO. Having a mischievous thought. I was so accustomed to seeing UFOs that I had taken the time to stroll around the yard and check on my flower garden before giving the star people any further attention. Backward. and the other was hovering about 40 feet in front of me. I walked around to the side yard and saw the sun just coming up above the horizon. in the distance. I looked up and. it would descend and the door would open…if I backed up. and I was laughing to myself like a kid testing its parent. It was lovely. 20 feet up. Backward. the UFO would ascend and the door would close. Forward. young and old. I came to understand that all these people were somehow related and were part of a family. The grass was wet with dew. You see. I wandered closer to the nearby UFO and it slowly began to descend. that nothing really surprised me anymore. I decided to have some fun with it. I entered the alternate reality and walked outside to my backyard. The ship went up and down in the air. What I did not fully realize yet was that I was also part of this family. I repeatedly walked toward the ship and then backed off. There were two people standing not far from the craft to the left. however. 60 . Forward. A door on the bottom of the ship opened as it neared the ground. about onequarter of a mile away.” I met so many people in so many situations. During an exceptionally vivid encounter.

We can only let YOU in. “We can’t keep it open. but I was more interested in checking out the room. This area appeared to be like a garage! I was surprised to see familiar tools – I’m pretty sure I saw a shovel hanging on the wall and a garbage can in the corner. “Keep the door open!” and a voice sounded in my mind. I yelled out.Hybrids I wanted to see what the craft would look like from a distance. The cream-colored male. but I wondered what they had come for. As I was examining the room. I noticed a table piled with loose pictures. and I 61 . I was the only person in the photos. I saw baby pictures of myself. I finally went inside the ship. Some of them looked familiar. and the walls looked smooth. maybe because I remembered when they were taken or perhaps because I had not seen them in a long time. Cupping hand to mouth. I just had to think about looking outside and the walls would become transparent. followed behind and watched my every movement. He looked very familiar to me and was quite friendly. I walked over and sat in a chair in front of the table. So. The room had a pleasing blue tint to it. A male star person was there to greet me. The bottom door drew closed. Surprisingly. as if I needed more volume (when they could probably read my devilish thoughts). if it landed with the door open. but the ship stayed on the ground. about a foot shorter than me. I was confused and wondered how they had gotten them. From what I recall. I examined the photos closely.” which I thought was ridiculous…I was only standing about 30 feet away – would somebody please tell me – WHO is going to see a UFO in my backyard and madly dash into the opening before they can shut the door? I laughed and shook my head and then decided that I’d spare them any more grief and just go in. It felt pretty nice to be in there. I knew this because whenever I wanted to.

above the ears. especially my feet.Invitation to the Self was just an infant. Feeling dejected. “You aren’t my mother. I could feel them examining my every move. I lay there. thinking about the star people.” No matter how much my interest was drawn to the photos. “How the heck did they get these…? Did they steal these from us?” I started to feel a little angry. I turned around to see her. She looked like a hybrid to me. she and the male went to an upper floor of the ship and watched me from there. I got up and left. about 6-foot. “This is your mother. I rose from the chair. indignantly sticking my nose into the air as I went by. still and silent. but kept my eyes on the stranger…or should I say imposter? This made no sense to me and made me even angrier. Why did they have those baby pictures? Why did they want me to know they had them? Why would that star lady say she was my “mother?” I knew what they wanted.” I did not turn toward him when he spoke. wanting to see my reaction to the pictures and perhaps to my so-called “mother. I walked by her. I woke to a seriously tingly body. She was tall. there were about 10 star people on the upper floor. I looked through them for a few minutes and then noticed baby pictures of both my parents as well. Her hair was a light blonde color and was cut very short. I was disgusted. All together.” purposely turning my back to her and then returning to the pictures. shoving it backwards. with light-colored skin. A star lady had entered the room while I was looking at the photos. which was a typical occurrence for me after a visitation. they wanted 62 . She was thin. The male said to me. I already have a mother. I was not going to give them what they wanted.

I didn’t have time to wonder what.Hybrids me to accept them as my “family”…but why? I already had my real family. Using a new skill I had learned from the star people. yelling excitedly from the back porch. was I in for a rude awakening. I went to greet the three. I peered nervously toward the front door in anticipation and saw small. this unspoken knowledge was understood simultaneously by my entire family. and I knew the star people would understand that. They were my friends. but I wasn’t going to turn it down! I was excited and scared at the same time. I handed them out to Bryan and the kids in case we needed them for defense. Somehow. then began to glide into the living room. and found myself sitting up in the bed. it’s red!” My two daughters were in the bed next to me. oh boy. Three dark grey star people slowly made their way up the porch steps and entered the front door. A few months after the encounter with my “mother. I had dealt with negative experiences enough to know that it is always wise to be prepared. Boy.” I was once again making that familiar trip into the alternate reality. as my husband ran into the room and jumped onto the bed to join us. In fact. Smiling. exactly. and we watched in awe as a red glow filled the room. dark figures approaching the house. They did not appear to be dangerous. Leaving the bedroom by myself and walking out toward the living room. striding toward them 63 . I focused my thoughts and used subtle energy to create knives for each of us. I did not want to take any chances with my family involved. Even though I felt that these particular visitors were friends of mine. and a UFO with red lights landed in the yard right outside the windows. I instantly knew they had come to help me. “It’s red. I needed protection for. and they wanted to give me some type of protection. Bryan was trying to get my attention.

Running to the front door. Three little girls stood before me. I thought they were so beautiful. and there were three of them as well.” apparently not understanding my confusion. waiting for me to make the first move. I did not want them to go. and ran the other way. I was confused. almost black. which I held out to her. For some reason. I opened my hand and willed the knife to disappear. I took a seat next to my husband and kids. come on in. greyish color. I looked into the eyes of the oldest one and asked. “Hi.” They jumped in fright. a way 64 . I stopped in my tracks and looked behind me to see if something scary was back there. The three girls stood near the bed.Invitation to the Self saying. Their heads were large. even though that was the feeling I picked up from them. I needed to choose names to give their fathers. “We are children. Their fingers were webbed. quickly turned. I showed them my open hands and they cautiously. and their skin was a shady. I just couldn’t fathom the idea that these highly intelligent individuals were actually kids. I stared at them as hard as I could. She explained to me that their fathers were outside in the ship. jet-black eyes. Then I looked down and saw a dagger in my hand…oops. The oldest one examined my open palm. They had sent the little girls in because I would not be afraid of them. reluctantly returned. the backs of their hands had small bumps on them. and I was intrigued. “Why do you look like children?” and she replied. but there was nothing. She then took my hand and I led the three of them to where my family was sitting in the bedroom. I stuck my head out and called to them as they were running swiftly toward their ship. but the fathers might be terrifying to me. I wanted to see everything about them. and so were their deep.

They liked being near us. and I would be able to go aboard the ship. I could feel my heart about to jump out of my chest as my mind came to the abrupt realization that I was standing upright in front of this star person. I had apparently gone through a transition moving to the craft. but I forced myself to stay awake and watch.approximately one foot in front of my face was a star person who must have been 15 foot tall. but was waking and starting to think more clearly. so I stayed calm. white glowing light that filled the room. What I first recall onboard is just gaining consciousness. something done to my head. There was definitely a soft. I had learned to control my fear with the help of past teachings of the star people. One of them was “Old MacDonald” – everyone thought that was funny. to recognize them in some way. at least for a few more seconds (which is what I was thinking as I desperately tried to retain consciousness). So. I was immediately transported inside the ship. I didn’t realize where I was right away. Then it dawned on me . we made a little game out of it. My family helped me come up with the names.Hybrids for me to label them. The room seemed foggy. As soon as the three names were chosen. I could see the amusement and fascination in their eyes. Standing behind him were two others. including the star children who laughed when Bryan and my two daughters started laughing. My vision was beginning to come into focus. for protection. This would allow them to make contact with me in a way I could understand. Regardless. I felt disoriented. I felt like sleeping. Fortunately. only coming up to his KNEE! 65 . but perhaps it was my just my vision. One of them was finishing up some type of “work” on me. These were the fathers the children had spoken of.

I felt warmth emanating from him as I once again left conscious awareness. I headed home like some zombie just brought to life. It was raining. to give me protection. I was just waking up and was unable to move for a few seconds. I quickly grabbed the dream notebook and began writing as fast as my hands could go.” a good thing. I think my head was almost touching his knee. I instinctually began to walk home. The mere height of him scared me. I briefly looked around to see the town that I knew very well covered in the quiet darkness of night. and I am grateful for that. He treated me with kindness and was very gentle. no matter how scary. The next thing I knew. had I known. These children were precious.Invitation to the Self Even so. They were highly intelligent. but I tried to think of watching what was happening instead of being scared. I had no clue who they were. It was then that it struck me – the realization that the star children I’d just met were my children. MY children…. The rain was cold and drenching. Then…he picked me up in his hands. My next memory is of standing in the bank parking lot downtown. One thing I do know is 66 . with a beauty that shone from within. I do not know how I would have reacted. He was actually able to pick up my entire limp body in just his hands. spilling onto the notebook and blurring my vision. he had done something to my “mind. and it was awfully frightening. When I met these three daughters of mine. my mind filled with thoughts and images. as my heart and mind were both racing like some scared animal. raindrops hitting the pavement. He brought me up toward his chest. I didn’t even pay attention to where I was stepping. Tears were streaming down my face. I was standing so close to him.

and I felt their curiosity perk up when I asked them why they looked like children. and soaked in as much of them as I could before they were taken away. I felt a closeness and a compassion that I could not explain. They came to me that night as part of a plan to protect me. They were the same size as many of the adult star people. in my arms. There was an air of calm intelligence. as I knew they were observing my every move. but the underlying theme is of a calm and self-controlled intelligence and inquisitiveness combined with the beauty of human emotion and feeling. dark eyes. standing tall with a sense of self-confidence. so it was hard to tell the difference! I finally figured out for myself that they were children by empathically picking up feelings from them. I hold hope in my heart that I will meet with her again. some looking more human and others seeming more like star people. I did not yet know this was my own child. There is a child-like innocence that is apparently universal. I would have held them close to me. human and star person combined is compelling. I have seen various degrees of this “mixing”. I only felt how attracted we were to each other and how I could have held her hand all night. I do not know why the hybrid children are being created. What I can say is that the ones I have been fortunate enough to meet have filled me with intrigue -–their beauty and intelligence. holding her small hand in mine.Hybrids that I would not have wanted them to leave. I was so impressed with the way they held themselves. This is a fond memory that I will never forget. and they were very brave taking the chance of entering the house on their 67 . When I sat down and looked into the eldest’s big.

whatever world they live in. I have nothing but love and respect for these children. with no help from their fathers outside. 68 . and I see their futures as being very promising.Invitation to the Self own.

Visitation Part Three implants 69 .

I ran out of the room to find help. it was just something I got used to over time." which was most likely myself. For example. hair turning white with a reddish tint. I became familiar with the star people implants but was never exactly sure what they were for. the conscious recollection of implants surfaced.Invitation to the Self Not long after I began recording my dreams.I am not saying that it was ever a comfortable experience. At times. Don't get me wrong . I saw telephone poles and trees nearby. I remembered having little. On a night in the early summer of 1992. metallike objects inserted into various body parts. military of some sort. The implant would be in place the next day. There was a helicopter flying above me. and well remembered. the memory of being implanted was vague and well covered up. I gained consciousness on a dark." as I referred to him. Then I saw the man in charge of this operation: a "Washington Official. I was being led by the left arm into an area that contained mobile trailers set up alongside the road. near a large ditch filled with overgrown grass. the implantation was very clear and straightforward. 70 . I woke. I was led to one of the trailers at the front of the line. The most remarkable and clearly recalled implantations were not conducted by the star people. Of course. actually physically present. This is where it goes blank. sat up in my bed and noticed that all my bedroom windows were open. I realized immediately it was a visitation – on occasion this happens.S. things like all the windows being open or all the lights being on or off. country road. in one alternate reality event. in his late 50’s. but by U. skin also had a reddish tint. and the only other thing I could recall in the morning was that "someone was taken out in the woods and implanted by the aliens. and a few vehicles with red flashing lights were parked along the roadside. at other times.

all military personnel.Implants with lots of wrinkles. They seemed to assume that in my altered state of consciousness. This was information I had not previously or consciously known. The job he needed to do now was to put a new "bug" in my nose. I knew by picking up feelings from him empathically that this man had done the job many times before. it would be impossible for later recall. He took a seat in the swivel chair beside mine and began to gather the equipment he needed from the counter. as if I could not hear them. and I learned that they had no idea how I had been able to dislodge the previous implant from my body. The whole trailer was filled with military personnel working on computers and other types of electrical equipment. What was so insane to me was that I was wide-awake. I felt quite alert and aware of what was happening. I attempted to remain calm and let them drag me around – that’s the way I am of course. seemed to realize this. I was surprised to see 71 . It was a little "kit" that contained the tracking device. but they conversed plainly and openly about it in front of me. or at least very consciously aware of what was happening. None of the people around me. since I had somehow managed to get the "last one" out on my own. He sat me down in a swivel chair next to a counter that held a computer. They must have seen that my eyes were open and I was looking around. His build was medium with a height of about 5foot-11. The man in charge took my arm and led me into the trailer. have to get that information. He spoke with some soldiers about my procedure. truthfully. so I pretended to be oblivious by letting my eyes glaze over and not look at anyone directly. and was actually becoming bored with it. I didn’t want them to realize I was awake.

When the implanting was complete. My eyes began to water. Somehow. and into the road. I looked around slowly. He only looked at my nose and did not bother to check anything else about my condition. he casually stood up and grabbed my right arm. I thought. I charged into the open field. It seemed to me as though he were just going to let me stand there. and I wanted to scream so badly. I acted as “zombie-like” as I possibly could. All the while. wanting to run into the field and toward trees. wanting so badly to run. I took off. or just let me wander off. not wanting to attract any undue attention to myself. and so sloppy with his work. joking about something. with a concentrated gaze. He let go of my arm and began to walk away. headed for the group of trees.Invitation to the Self that it was like a standard issue type of thing. He slowly led me out the door. 72 . I was screaming inside. down the portable metal steps. he used a long. Leaning toward me. feeling the cold. but I dared not let them know I was conscious. with the tall plants reaching my knees. Everyone appeared to be busy doing something else. In one quick leap of faith. but I did. watching them as I took each step down into the ditch. thin tool to push the bug far up into my nose. a forest to hide in. this guy was talking to the others. still talking to the others in the trailer. This was my break. The guy that had me by the arm was now walking away. wet grass on the bottoms of my feet. and I didn't know what to do. I kept my cool somehow. I carefully stepped off the road. I forced myself to remain stationary even though I felt like jumping up and ripping the thing from my nostril. I don't know how. He pulled the little pieces from the plastic baggie and positioned himself to begin his work. longing to run out the door. I scanned the area for personnel.

Had the stitches dissolved. mucus covered string began to emerge from my right nostril. Listening all the time to hear their shouting. plopped out of my nose into the sink. I would not have been able to remove the bug myself. and I blew with such force that I was getting dizzy. an old gas station.Implants I knew I would have to make haste if I were to remove the new implant from my nose. red and wet with tears. soon realizing there was a small town on the other side of the thin wood. The muscles in my legs burned as I reached their limits and pushed farther. and of all places. not looking back. covered in blood and mucus. The string kept coming. at the same time attempting to hold back the tears enough so I could see and concentrate on escape. I became quiet and studied the object. The whole thing. I gently pulled. I didn’t take time to think about how fortunate this was. With a firm and steady grip. Eventually. On the side of the building I approached was an open door that I quickly entered. I caught a fleeting glimpse of my face. but none came. of course. Every now and then. knowing that the implant was attached to the other end. directly into the sink. I held my breath and grabbed the string securely. I ran so hard. In a brief moment of overwhelming curiosity. I emerged into a quiet area. I knew I had to hurry. A white plastic piece appeared. What looked like a knot of stitches was connecting the small white plastic piece to the actual bug. You 73 . which they were doing rapidly. Gathering up a great amount of courage. My clogged up nose and uncontrollable sobbing made it difficult to breath. I reached the tree line and kept going. and I could feel something larger approaching. I looked into the mirror as I began blowing my nose harder than ever. as I shook and cried. This was a bathroom and. a slimy.

staring at two rooms that were situated side by side. dark area. The aliens laughed at me and asked if I would stay with them. another metal object was implanted inside my nose during the course of the night. standing in single file. They focus on a predetermined task and complete it. military. So why did they want to keep track of me? Good question. They were identical in size and shape.Invitation to the Self would not believe how grateful I felt at that moment. as I looked down at the device and then at my disheveled reflection and burst into tears once again. the government protecting me from aliens. This is the way I remember it: I was standing in an empty. This wouldn’t be so difficult if I felt they were on my side…you know. On my birthday that year.S. and possibly some type of secret groups within the government. and their movements were precisely 74 . their actions were human in nature. It has been the best way for me to describe these people. all the years of my experience. These were clearly not alien visitors. What made them differ from each other was the right-side room being filled with “aliens. There have been different branches of the military represented. As though it wouldn’t be bad enough to experience strange and terrifying visitations from people of other worlds. I felt even more afraid of the government visitations than those of the star people. I have never been able to come up with an alternative word for the term “government” during these odd visits. star people do not normally do sloppy work. Quite the contrary. What was truly strange to me was that the aliens were all identical.” and the left-side room being filled with beautiful flowers. I was now subject to an intense scrutiny by what appeared to be U.

and they have never stood there 75 . He was almost transparent. In the morning. It occurred to me that no matter how many encounters I’ve had with the star people. they just kind of looked at me. and then I was able to stick my finger in there and feel around. quite like a projected image. It felt like something was lodged in there. they watched a television show about two men who were abducted by aliens and had their noses implanted with “bugs. the right side of my nose hurt terribly. For some reason. I kept feeling it everyday. I came to the realization that there were no star people involved in that particular procedure at all. as it slowly turned and worked its way toward the tip of my nose. pin-like metal object about one-half inch in length just on the inside of the skin. It was like I was actually looking at one alien in a fun house mirror. rational explanation into the picture. Soon after. They just did not know what to say about it. The pain was excruciating for two days. but it hurt so badly that I could not touch it. I did not go to the doctor. I had nothing but bad feelings and did not try to piece anything together. It was easy to reach. I could barely move my face without having shooting pains run into my right eye and sinuses. and then I lost track of it.Implants mirrored by one another. perhaps because I’d never really gotten results from a doctor after visitation before.” Then my parents had a visual to go by. but they couldn’t. When I told my parents about my experience. Instead. not far up inside my right nostril. I just wanted to get away. they have never mirrored each other’s actions. There was a small. I told my parents that aliens had abducted me and shoved something up my nose…. At the time. Then about two weeks later. to put some kind of meaningful. I know they were attempting to understand.

although I had no memory of it from the night before. We both already knew that we were having similar experiences. Well. the other end would pop up just underneath the skin on her arm. The swelling and redness around mine had already gone down considerably. The next evening. not the government. besides my parents. Unfortunately. but this time I was very surprised to discover that she had the same type of object in her arm that I had in mine. We compared lumps. after seeing the holographic images a few times. This is apparently a technique used to distract people and lead them to believe that the star people are responsible for these events transpiring.Invitation to the Self laughing at me – why would they? Sure. She proceeded to tell me that she had dreamt 76 . mean star people. they had better things to do than spend precious time taunting me. and this angered me – I could deal with my own situation. they might tell a few good jokes now and then. my little sister came to see me. I was not the only person in my family. This was very familiar. I felt a pain in my forearm. Even in the experiences I’ve had with negative. but hers was really swollen. I checked it out and found a pinlike metal object about one-half inch long just under my skin. and my first thought was of another bug from the government people. One morning when I got out of bed. I caught on.they like to use holographic images. It was truly disgusting. who was dealing with the issue. There is also the fact that similar events transpired during future government visitations . but knowing that it was happening to my kid sister hurt me beyond what I can describe. but they’re always too busy completing some procedure to just stand around and laugh. When she pushed on one end of the pin-like object.

Even talking to our parents would be hard. He chased both of us and did something “bad” to her arm. I will talk more about this in a later chapter. If we had to have little pieces of junk in our arms. Even if we did know for sure. At the same time I was going through visitations. Well. but they did not know about my little sister’s experiences. One suspicious incident took place over a weeklong period. You may be asking yourself. I’m sure that hearing about it from me made them feel bewildered and helpless enough. she was at the point of cutting the thing out. How did I learn to do this? Well. the star people were teaching me what you might call “psychic skills. and I definitely wasn’t going to slice her arm open. I’ll tell you. literally. overloading them and causing them to short-circuit. It all began with a vivid dream. we directed large amounts of it into the bugs. but decided not to chance hurting myself further.” which did involve energy manipulation. at least they would be no good to whoever put them there. I had thought the same about my implant. “Why didn’t they just go to the doctor?” You have to understand that it would be difficult for us to explain what had happened to our arms.Implants about a “mean government man” coming into the house. My eyes opened sleepily as I heard repetitive knocks on my front door. 77 . I knew the implants were energy based. Using our hands to gather subtle energy. It wasn’t instant knowledge popping into my mind. explaining it to the local family practitioner would be quite a task. What we did instead was to take the problem into our own hands. and neither of us wanted to be considered mentally unstable. and it didn’t take long to figure out that anything running off energy could be overloaded and broken. I had done it myself. ending with what may have been an implant.

Four nights later. I was a bit bewildered by that. but it was so far underneath the skin that I could not reach it. He just kept blinking into new bodies.Invitation to the Self It sounded like someone was anxious to get in. I squinted my eyes to try to gain a better focus. but I did not favor any of them. Oddly. I saw the same man in the house again. whether it made sense or not. and a few of those incidents were close to waking reality. I woke to a strong burning. On the seventh day. He seemed to be here and there throughout many dreams that week. It didn’t make any sense. The burning was so strong it made me jump and almost cry. I got up and walked across the room to the clock and the pulsing sensation stopped. my first instinct was to analyze the situation. I have no idea what made the change occur. as though I would not notice. noticing that the head didn’t quite match the body. near the elbow. I suspected a possible implant. I saw a strange man standing there. but nonetheless. The spot suddenly became very cool and had no 78 . he kept changing his appearance. this time every 17 seconds. I tried to scratch the spot. as he slipped into the form of another boyfriend. and he managed to walk right into the house. I recorded a pulsing sensation every six seconds. I thought. I lay back down on the bed again. it was an emergency. He held his hand over the burning area and pushed energy into it. Of course. I ran to the door and quickly pulled it open. itching sensation in my left arm. He took on the form of my very first boyfriend. so Bryan helped me right away with energy manipulation. that is what happened. and the sensation returned. Looking at the clock in my room. Perhaps. Then I saw a bright flash and heard a loud noise before I woke up startled. I suppose he was trying to see which one I liked best.

wearily trudging toward me. but. he managed to keep up with me. and sat upright. I thought I had actually lost him. I was quick. He followed me through neighborhoods. silently begging me to not run. He saw the urgent look in my eyes and bent his head to the side with an imploring glare. the skill of deftly tracking a soul from one state of consciousness to another is rare indeed. implants got to be horribly normal and regular. I slumped over in exhaustion. because I didn’t have anything left in me. the added energy stopped it from throbbing. I had no memory of receiving an implant. During the following night. but it never hurts to try. leaned over and consolingly 79 . Then he appeared. holding a silver gun down by his side. I ended up in my grandmother’s backyard near the water. I decided to give in. and even different dream states – and that is saying something. He almost lost his balance. I was startled by the sight. He gratefully and slowly made his way toward me. Whatever it was. I wasn’t ready for this new maneuver. I was completely exhausted. Unfortunately. I had him on a wild goose chase. Why did they follow me. a government psychic chased me from one scene to another. and by the end of the night. that he was exhausted as well. Of course. He reached me. I had used all my energy trying to avoid confrontation. relentlessly persisting on tagging various body parts? I do not have the answer. I felt a few very weak impulses. countrysides. not caring anymore. I could see.Implants more burning pulsations. debating whether I would keep running or not. and he had used all his energy trying to catch me. He arrived in a helicopter. I sat and waited for him. For a moment. One night. but then it stopped forever. as he stepped from the craft. having learned many tricks of evasion and ways to hide. surprisingly.

Most are small. alive.Invitation to the Self said. just hold still now. appearing to be more like fatty cysts when removed. but some of the implants seem to be organic. however. He believes there are different types of implants. “The government implants have been recognized as mechanical devices. and for simplicity.” The majority of implants Bryan has encountered have been government made. These are the implants that run off the body’s energy. I sat down with Bryan and we talked in-depth about his experience.” He went on to say that the star people implants resemble insects when in place. It is not an easy idea to discuss. metallic-like objects that act as radio transmitters or "bugs. The star people implants. removing implants. The implants of the star people. According to his research. I did not feel any pain. They exist separately from the body’s own energy. however. yet less sophisticated than those of the star people. the government bugs are more technological. it makes one feel like an animal being tagged by scientists for research purposes. which seem to be organic. This will be quick. I learned that some of the implants run off the body's own electrical system. have their own energy fields. with outstretched “legs. are much more complex." Just as many contactees have said before.” He gently pressed the gun tip into my right ear and pulled the trigger. are organic in nature. Some of the implants. I get this information from my own experience and from energy healers that have worked with abductees. How they exist in the 80 . he places them in two major categories: government implants and star people implants. I knew he had just inserted an implant. My husband is one of those people. They are mechanical devices that are easily overloaded with energy and short-circuited. “Okay Bonnie.

he is seeing the form that the object takes energetically. Either that. with no injury to the abductee/contactee. he replied. first try to find an experienced “energy healing practitioner”. This person needs to understand the subtle energy fields of the body and how this energy 81 . both types of implants can be absorbed into the body. It is also possible that a cushion somewhat like a cyst will form around the area. or Qigong. he works with it on a different level. “An electrical device can only sustain so much energy running through it. you have to disrupt that barrier and break it apart. As Bryan says.” The star people implants need to be dealt with in a different fashion. “Even though the government implants are mechanical devices. When he “sees” an implant. not physically. he does not know. If you believe you have an implant.” Understand that when Bryan does this type of procedure. he is working with energy fields within and around the body.Implants body. but imagines that a parasitic situation takes place. Since the implant has its own energy field. Once they cease functioning. or the body will reject them and push them out through the skin. How do you get rid of an implant? If it is a government implant. which enables him to destroy it more effectively. you can push subtle energy into the spot until the implant shortcircuits. they do not appear to be made of pure metal. with the living implant absorbing needed nutrients from the human body. Reiki. “Most doctors would view these implants as cancerous cells.” He went on to say that the body treats the implants from the star people as part of itself. When asked what type of material the government implants are made of. The body is able to absorb them. someone who works with techniques such as Healing Touch. Although the implant IS physically present.

keep repeating the direction of energy into that spot. This really works. There may be some of you who wonder if the implants are always bad things. and focus on it. particularly a ball of white light. Examine your leg and try to see the energy of the implant. just try to feel it there. There should be a slight distinction between the normal energy of your leg and that of the implant. If I suspect that I have an implant. Let’s suppose it is in your leg. Continue moving the flow of energy back and forth until you can really feel it. Imagine a ball of energy forming. Keep doing this over and over. but it at least causes the implant to become inoperative. See it “explode” or burst open and then suddenly grow dark. Visualize the implant getting hotter and hotter. No matter what type of energy it has. This does not take it out from under the skin. it won’t take as long. Some contactees may feel that the implants from star 82 . Just hold your arm out in front of you and imagine the energy flowing from your elbow to your fingertips and back. I certainly don’t like to think about a foreign object living in my body. Now you can take that ball of energy in your hand and send it into the implant area. I don’t know anyone who feels comfortable about having an implant in his or her body. If you cannot find that kind of help. Put your hand over your leg and direct all the gathered energy into that one small spot. and the light of its energy getting brighter. If not. Then take that energy and bring it all into the palm of your hand. You also need to visualize where the implant is.Invitation to the Self works. If you have a friend to help. you can manipulate the implant with your own energy or with help from a friend. Try to practice using energy by moving it up and down your arm. Bryan and I use focused energy to overload it. That is how you “kill” it. If you cannot see it.

You should hold to your own and be true to yourself. I have felt that perhaps my star friends needed the implant there for this reason. Like I said. 83 . At times. it’s a personal preference. they will find a way.Implants people are a way for their friends to find them. I don’t need to have a foreign object taking up residence under my skin. I decided otherwise. it really is a personal decision. We all have different perspectives on life. but then after thinking good and hard about that concept. I believe that if someone wants to see me bad enough. anytime. I certainly didn’t have any implants when they first contacted me at age four…at least. I don’t think I did. anywhere. Well.

Invitation to the Self 84 .

Training Part One testing 85 .

meaning that if someone near me feels sad. being part of a whole group of people who feel happiness. operations. and lying on a table or sitting in a chair to get comfortable. better yet. The star people also wanted me to learn more about the Earth. The best part of being an empath is feeling the glowing energy of happiness flow from an individual who is nearby or. life-giving. there began a teaching. When I began to consciously recall visitation experiences around age 20. I have become more empathic toward others. Slowly. I spent many sessions 86 . The usual routine was: boarding a craft. most events dealt with some type of biological manipulation.Invitation to the Self Hybrids. and implants were not the sole activities of visitation. but I can tell you what happened. a new experience came into play – one of psychic teaching and testing. It involved using senses outside the normal range of our regular five and functioning in environments not found on the physical plane of existence. Since the star people have been working with me. I will feel their sadness. quiet room accompanied by a star person. That type of situation creates a wonderful. so I regularly joined them on short excursions around the planet. I can feel it. Either way. I was learning about the Earth as we flew over the mountains or seas or wherever. and sometimes a star person stood next to me and spoke. In between egg extractions and scary episodes of poking and prodding. In front of me was a large screen that may have been a window. walking into a dark. supportive energy that we all thrive for. I cannot explain the “why” of any of it. I am open to other people’s feelings. Sometimes I put on headphones to hear descriptions of what I viewed on the screen. If a person is angry or upset or anxious or nervous.

My hands went flying out in front to stop my fall and. I know what – let’s switch today! I’ll run the equipment and you lay on the table. 87 . “Okay. knowing we were learning together. and he or she would do so. I was being impatient.Testing doing this. in one befuddled movement. and then slowly looked up at me and replied. I would ask the star person standing near me to explain. eyes downcast toward the floor. It was usually the young male whom I had come to know during these classes. Like a kid set loose in a candy store. briefly examined the equipment. He was like an apprentice or teaching assistant. and his slim. “…okay. learning as we went along. white figure was clothed in cotton-looking shades of blue. hit the counter. I sped back to my willing. This became so routine that one day I said to him. It’ll be fun!” He hesitated momentarily. His features were quite human in nature. although his skin was a bit pale. so I felt at ease with him. Not even waiting to regain my composure. he hopped onto the table and lay back just as I had done so many times before. catching the headphones and myself. tripping over my own feet. He wore a matching vest that I thought was so cute.” Trustingly. they apparently knew a great deal about the Earth itself and wanted me to learn these things as well. clearly weighing in his mind what consequences he might face. his eyes were a bit larger and blacker. “Hey. timid friend and helped him adjust the apparatus to his head. and he had no hair. He ran the equipment and helped me make any adjustments I needed. I excitedly ran to retrieve the headphones. as I moved to the controls and. He stood around 5-foot-2. not wanting to spend too much time figuring it out and seem like I didn’t know what I was doing. Needless to say. get ready!” I said. If I did not understand what I was seeing on the screen.

I learned how to manipulate energy in alternate states of consciousness. and it was very dark so my vision was impaired. This happened just by observing and copying. something we all do from the beginnings of our lives. moving through various energy bodies. It was quiet and still.Invitation to the Self My ignorance was quickly revealed as sound blared from the headphones. One evening I was standing alone in the woods. some about myself. their pets. Soon I noticed a faint glowing through the 88 . I was in the alternate reality. “maybe we shouldn’t do this. but all I could see were the black profiles of trees. that were not always things I wanted to know. mating rituals. telekinesis. To name a few: geography of the Earth. I don’t even remember feeling a slight breeze.” he moaned. I looked around me. This became necessary if I were to spend any amount of time in those other places. I saw and learned amazing things. and aspects of energy manipulation. Just to be able to move about and function freely required a new set of skills – I was not in the material world that I was used to. I also learned quite a few things on my own. Along the way. causing the star person to jump up and swiftly remove the offending gear. people and cultures of the Earth. which made the scene pretty eerie. I had just become aware of being there and assumed that once again. agriculture.” I agreed completely and quietly took my place on the table. Even though many of the teachings were apparently planned out ahead of time. absorbing and pushing out energy. mental telepathy. “Ohhh. sensing the presence of spirits and other entities.” different types of star people. the design of countless UFOs. government documents about extraterrestrials labeled “Top Secret. The teachings consisted of a wide variety of topics. There were new rules that had to be mastered.

and every scar I had showed up during this test. It was a yellowish color that became clearer to me as I approached. Inside the house were other star people who asked me to hold my arms out. Pyramids and other geometric shaped scars began to appear all over my body. The pyramid shapes were probably only 3-foot tall. The test was to show which star people had been in contact with me. When they had finished. so I did. I wondered how they could have gotten there and. 89 . keeping my eyes and ears open for any movement. as the thought came to my mind. hovering just above the ground. They performed a few tests on my skin. I was positively horrified. Apparently. My hands and forearms had become red and swollen. It was a magical feeling to be among the glowing shapes in the night. I walked steadily toward the light. floating out there in the middle of the woods. They said that one star person in particular had left a “trace” on me three or more times. I soon realized the glow was in the shape of a pyramid. I saw another glow. a thin. As I got closer. many scars that appeared as my veins swelled and I got a bad feeling in my stomach. He escorted me to a small “house. I entered a small clearing and saw numerous glowing pyramids of different colors. and something about a “sliver. which I do not recall in great detail. this one was a light blue color.” I walked back through the woods to the pyramids where I was supposed to wait for someone. light-colored star person appeared in the clearing next to me. they each left their own kind of mark. which seemed to be at ground level. They were beautiful but supernatural looking. There were many. but I do not remember anything beyond that.” which happened to be in the woods not far from where I had been standing with the glowing shapes.Testing trees. I had a look for myself.

I was also shown other planets. They all sat around the sidelines watching me. I did great. I knew I had been visited since I was a young child. I was taken to a “top secret” class where I learned about star people. language and writing. Well. And during one 90 . right? Inside this place was a maze.” As it turned out. Think so? There were no visible scars on me in the morning. which I think I associated with precious gems something you see in every castle. some in our solar system and some elsewhere. which was a good thing. I was either being poked and prodded or placed in some maze to find my way out. a labyrinth in which test subjects were to fumble around aimlessly. and from the looks of it. Perhaps it was the idea that my entire body had been manipulated and scarred that made me ill. I was taught about various types of UFOs and some of their passengers. I was lost inside a “strange castle” (which was my label for it). their ways of life. and I made my way out fairly quickly. On numerous occasions. it had been longer than just a few years. but I never imagined they had been hurting me like that. they placed me in the maze. Why oh why did they need to know what I was capable of? On one occasion. The structure had very tall ceilings and was filled with sparkling lights. Among the many lessons. The star people told me that if I passed the test I could “have the castle. Would they cut and operate on small children? Did they take skin samples and do testing on little kids? It was apparent to me at that point that they did.Invitation to the Self I felt sick the next morning. What I want to know is when I’m going to get my castle…. Testing was such a favorite thing for the star people to do. of course. I was beginning to get the idea that I had been in the presence of quite a few star people.

but no sugar. but I’m not sure. I presume these star people had. smaller objects and. the infamous “chocolate shake. then. He seemed to be proud of that one. The star people happily looked to each other in acknowledgement. it may have been on a very large ship. thick book that told about life where some of them lived. like souvenirs. I wondered if he had picked them up during a visit. One even gave a little jump in excitement.Testing visitation. tasted a chocolate milkshake and wanted to copy the recipe…well. I held back the grimace that wanted to surface and instead smiled and pretended that I liked it.” that could very well have been a ship. As I was standing there. They were so pleased with themselves. as though he’d made it himself. with a star person. To me. I took a gulp. looking out across the dry and 91 . A very friendly and hospitable star person handed me an old. I was standing inside an elevated glass “booth. admiring the headboard. it tasted like lumps of dry cocoa floating in tepid water. On the tour. I got the impression it was on another planet. knowing very well from the appearance and smell that it was not up to par with the chocolate milkshakes my dad makes. There was definitely something resembling chocolate in it. They were thrilled to have me there to test it out. I went on a tour of their living quarters. I was taken to a remote part of some planet. They were interested in showing me other. It was interesting to me because the shells looked like the ones we have on Earth. On another occasion. at some time. held my breath and swallowed.” My family and I joke about this incident of which I have told them repeatedly. I even saw a bed that had a headboard made out of seashells. their version of the drink was pretty horrible. three more star people entered the room.

Finally. I did my own investigative work. This craft reminded me of the colorful artwork created by many Native American peoples. On many occasions. and colors were great. That must have been the signal they were waiting for.Invitation to the Self dusty landscape. This time. They wanted me to learn as much as possible – that much was clear. I came to my senses and turned the thing on. The best I could do under such circumstances was to take in the information and store it subconsciously. As I watched the sky through the camera. an absolutely gorgeous UFO came into view. They intentionally crossed over my yard so I could get a look at them. I’m not sure how they expected me to take all the data in. the ground and the sky too. The different sizes. but it was overwhelming. although we could see a smaller planet in the distance. I was standing in my backyard. I was so dumbstruck by the enormity of the event. watching two lights floating far above me in the night sky. because it happened so very fast. shapes. I could see scattered rocks. because they came down and brought friends with them. It made me think of beadwork and also of 92 . but nothing more than that and dirt. I had the impression it may have been Mars. they even gave me my own video camera to catch UFO footage. So. sometimes with the aid of the star people. which was supposed to be Mars itself. I waved my open hand to them. Everything had a pinkish tint. So many UFOs flew over that I couldn’t focus on them all. I did not remember to use the camera I held in my hands until many UFOs had already passed by. not all of the so-called learning experiences were understandable to me. letting the camera hang down by my side. I didn’t know where we were. motioning them to come down.

It landed in the field near me. I felt privileged to be allowed to witness the beauty and serenity of the colorful rainbow craft. which were almost identical but smaller. The test was to push the correct sections and make a 93 . all I consciously recall of that part is descending. we sat around a teacher of extraterrestrial origin. At times. I participated in a number of group learning activities with other humans. Long “tentacles” hung from the bottom of the craft. During one event. There was a rainbow of colors covering this ship. as though it were a jellyfish.” Three more ships. It had sections on it that lit up and made musical tones when touched. The star people were quite interested in testing our psychic abilities.Testing Navajo sand paintings. The beautiful jellyfish ship took off. intently listening to lecture and taking notes. and exiting the craft along with four human children and my camera. watching the ground come closer to me. beautiful times with the star people. I hold Native American Indians as well as the alternate reality Indians in high regard. hovered in the sky above the larger one that had landed. I watched in awe as the children walked around my back yard. Unfortunately. That experience has been one of the more memorable. They seemed to be waiting. they passed around a flat. and my memory becomes blank. I was told that these children were special and had been taken aboard the craft because one day they would be “president’s aides. Our level of awareness was enough to focus on the teacher. and I was allowed aboard to videotape the inside of the ship. This could easily be held in one hand. plastic-like pad formed in a diamond shape. I have wondered if that ship was actually connected with the “Indian” people that have helped me on occasion. but not enough to turn to each other and converse.

During a visitation experience one evening. I’m not sure how well I did. but only bits and pieces come to the surface. We were having a conversation. and they were also writing. It takes patience to put the puzzle together. obviously. but the actions you take now that make up who you shall be that really matter. At one point I looked around and realized there were more humans present. I have been given much information over the years. I had written something about medicine and also this: “It is not the actions in your past that make up who you are. During the human group activities. I figured I could bring the paper home with 94 . possibly because I was having trouble keeping focus in the altered state of consciousness. I was so happy when they did that. The stronger your psychic abilities were. I believe that since we were all in an altered state of consciousness we did not speak amongst ourselves. These all came down near my yard and several star people emerged. but I kept forgetting what we were talking about.Invitation to the Self song. The large ships were light colored and the smaller ones black. Everyone tried it as the star people looked on. and that could be years apart. the louder it sounded. They did want me to remember certain things. but I was able to play a little song and the sound was louder than anyone else’s.” The unfortunate part about experiencing time with the star people in another state of consciousness is that it is difficult to recall many details. That seemed to be good enough for the testers. but listened to and focused on the directions given by the star people. if they had to give me paper to write it down or a video camera to record the information. I saw two extremely large mother ships let out 10 “baby ships” each. They gave me a sheet of paper and a writing implement so I could write down what they said.

I tried to ignore it. and I checked to make sure she was all right and sleeping soundly. This. Quite suddenly. with my back to the open room. it would be gone. thin face. I didn’t want him to think I was scared of him – but I was. One entire week. My youngest daughter was sleeping with me that evening. I was accustomed to knowing when spirits were nearby. I felt as though someone were observing me from the far corner of the room – and that someone had an odd energy pattern. It all started out early one morning when I was feeling restless and couldn’t sleep well. wanting to believe I was just making it all up in my head. possibly some grey. an impression came into my mind. and that was normal to me. however.m. and went to the bathroom. I distinctly felt an unusual presence. slanted. but saw nothing. I turned around and looked. He had large.Testing me and read it in the morning…but then when I woke up. and I wondered why they even bothered with that. He was unusual looking to me. 95 . I envisioned a very tall. I felt him watching me like a hole was being drilled into my back. The strong feeling of being watched came back to me. and I could not ignore it. His skin had a dark tone to it. Yep. just so he would know that I knew he was there. the whole week. skinny star person standing in the center of the room. I attempted to relax and clear my mind so I could go back to sleep. This did not prove to be helpful. made me very nervous. It was so disappointing. I tried to get comfortable facing the wall. I experienced a brand new type of visitation. black eyes and a long. I turned to look across the open room. When I returned to my room and climbed into bed. Once again. I got up around 5 a. nothing like the others I had seen.

A small white light flew down to me from the sky. but I was becoming increasingly uncomfortable. I held my daughter to comfort her. I felt more relaxed. So I did. Upon confronting the invisible tormentor. so I made myself wake up. although it had backed off and was no longer near the bed. Still feeling that prickly. I found myself lying in the bed. I swiftly lost waking consciousness. and I was shrouded in darkness. I was glad to see the shining object and was going to touch it. standing right behind me. but I saw no one. I could imagine him now. quite forcefully. “No. I was not going to let myself give in and be nice to him after that. so as to startle and scare him away. my daughter burst into tears. This thing would not give up. my body all tingly and unable to move. I rolled onto my opposite side to face the open room. I felt him moving closer. almost needle-like sensation. kissed her. The only way I would possibly be able to sleep would be to turn and face the menace. I knew this had something to do with the intruder. I quickly 96 . That was it! I spun around quickly. Initially.” stopped crying. It was still in the room. staring at me and giving me so much trouble. staring at me. and went back to sleep. Suddenly. it’s that alien!” I was mad at him for being in my room. It was night and I was standing at the edge of the ocean.Invitation to the Self Again. I tried to forget him and go to sleep. the incoming waves almost close enough to lap at my feet. I also felt fear. waiting for me to hold my hand out for it. as I would normally have done. and giving a few warning glances in his general direction. and told her that everything would be all right. I was getting very frustrated. Within a few minutes. At the same time I felt bothered and irritated by this situation. but then stopped myself. Even though I had not yet entered any type of scene. I had gone into the alternate reality. She said “okay.

I stayed awake until the tingles were completely gone. Then I let myself sleep. In fact. I started to get used to him and almost forgot he was there. many lessons on this subject and they tested me to the extreme. The light brought balloons and pretty clothes for me. Since I was still angry with him. wherever I went! Talk about freaky. It reminded me of what used to occur when I was just a toddler. so I grabbed the items and woke up. There were many. The next thing I knew. I just could not get rid of him. night and day.Testing recognized that feeling. He followed me around for an entire week. A small white light drifted down from the sky to the truck. release it. I was riding in a truck with my mother. The next night. They created scenarios in which I fought psychic attackers. he just stood and observed from a distance. One of the biggest lessons I learned from the star people was to face my fear. He did not approach my daughter or me. I pulled myself up and halfway out the open window. and control it. this star person was still in my room. though he did not bother me again like the first night. he had followed me throughout the day. He gave me a big smile and disappeared. I knew the stranger was desperately trying to be nice. as I was very tired and knew I couldn’t stay up any longer. I felt him there every night. I woke myself yet again. and I never saw him again. I had no choice but to find my own way out. I sat up in my bed and I told him just that. I was not afraid of him anymore. I sat in the passenger’s seat as she drove down the main street of our town. Always luring me…. After a week had passed. people chasing me with guns. They put me in situations where I was scared to the point of almost breaking down. reaching for toys and candies in the darkness above my bed. even 97 .

five humans entered the room in what appeared to be a trance-like state. The five people were lifted into the air by this energy. Without warning. The tiny. it floated there. they began to spin – a spinning motion that caused them to become even more dazed than they had been. The ball was solid and about the size of a grapefruit. The testing with the golden sphere was an extraordinary event. allowing it to float in midair. doesn’t it? But it’s no stranger than anything else that went on. They wanted me to be prepared for anything.Invitation to the Self aliens coming after me. I clapped my hands together and the golden ball emitted waves of energy. been connected with the transitionary phase of traveling from the physical dimension to the alternate reality. I eventually became used to their false backdrops and fake lighting in the test scenarios. Instinctively. This was a ball of gold that made a fine humming vibration. drifting into horizontal positions. I grabbed the ball in discontent and dashed into another room. mischievous star people standing around me were getting a big kick out of this. A memory was triggered in my mind and I then realized that this trick had been used on me many times before. It sounds strange. It glowed as it emitted an intensely compacted energy. and I assume they thought it would be fun to see what I could do with it. I looked back while I was running and saw the humans stop spinning and settle 98 . It had. Not happy at all with the results of this test. it seemed. sending ripples across the room as if a pebble had been tossed into a pond. at times. As the ball floated before me in mid-air. The golden ball was a device they used often. It was being manipulated by a rambunctious group of miniature individuals that reminded me of a kid’s soccer team. but when I threw it into the air.

the anxious star people were a little overbearing for me. They were laughing and having their fun. I decided to do this by trial and error. The star people ran after me to see what I would do next. I raised the volume and stopped for a moment just to take in the information. my attention quickly turned to other objects in the room. At that time. I focused on a small radio that was sitting on the table. I felt like I was babysitting a class of hyperactive elementary students…and I was definitely not in control! I listened as they played a raucous game of ball. so I wanted to get away from them. Becoming excited.Testing back down to the floor. my concentrated energy was amplified. I watched the stem lengthen and leaves sprout on all sides. The plant began to grow. I played around with the glowing sphere using my thoughts only. I focused my energy on the radio to turn on the power and then some music. With help from the ball. I released the golden ball and started flying around the house. They had all run outside with the golden ball. with my back to a window. They said to me. 99 . Noticing a houseplant sitting on a counter. oblivious to the trouble they were causing. as long as there were no other humans present. I focused my energy on it.I had just learned one of them on my own. These star people were new to me. The next thing I knew. they had broken through the window and glass shards flew into my back. with the power turned off. All this had been done with thought energy amplified by a sphere of gold. Through the use of the golden ball. and reminded me of devilish children – I hadn’t met anyone as curious as me until now! I sat down on a couch to rest. Quickly forgetting about the people and everything else around me. I attempted to learn the other powers of the ball .

which caused discomfort. thick – not like the typical skinny star people. In that way. I felt the density of the glass. How ridiculous is that? For quite some time I really hadn’t a clue as to what the image meant. Yes. but not pain. I have to say that probably the strangest and most unexplainable experience during my testing was meeting the giant eyeball. as if school was out on a holiday. It was curious. triggering the feeling and smells. There is a possibility that I had seen these star people before… perhaps a subconscious memory had tumbled around and reached the surface of my conscious mind when I woke. I had the feeling I was in the house I lived in when I was 11 years old. a group of star people casually floated over to my bedroom window. but I enjoyed the memory while it lasted. even though I was not on the physical plane. during visitations and even when I was on my own. One night. Their body shape and size indicated a need to float. but nothing concrete. particularly Thanksgiving. They just floated over from the neighbor’s yard. as they did not appear to have a ship or any other type of transportation.” when they saw the glass stuck into my back. an actual eyeball. you won’t feel it. It showed up now and then. they 100 . When I woke up in my bed. as though walking might be too much of a hindrance. but had an agenda all its own. However. quite unexpectedly.Invitation to the Self “Don’t worry. I felt excitement. I realized I was not really there. It did not appear to be directly associated with any star people. I ended up delicately pulling glass shards from my back with no help from them. I even smelled pumpkin pies baking downstairs. about 10-foot wide. They were tall and dense. flying through the astral plane. I think the weirdest part of this experience was waking up. and now I have theories.

It stared down at me. How dare this menacing monstrosity scare away my new friends like that?! I could remember seeing this ridiculous image before…but where? How strange it was. his arm reaching right through the glass window – keep in mind that visitation is taking place on another plane of existence and physical laws do not apply. and this was a wonderful experience for them. and I stared back at it in defiance. these were gentle beings.Testing seemed almost like sea mammals. I stared back at them in wonder. but what I felt from them was an outpouring of love. I 101 . The being dropped my hand and they instantly fled. I felt so much love coming from them and I thought to myself that their looks were deceiving. their gazes shot out towards the backyard. They also had sharp teeth and claws. was I surprised when I saw a giant eyeball staring at me from above the trees! This eyeball was not a spaceship. They approached the window and peered in. It did not appear to have any connection with the star people I had just seen. They were very happy. I smiled and held my hand out in greeting as they pushed each other aside to be the one to grab hold. and I watched their peaceful smiles turn to expressions of terror. a little hesitant to make a move. which may seem intimidating to some. The largest and most fierce looking grabbed my hand with awe. Boy. I got the impression they were not often met with such acceptance. and it was clear that he made a special effort to be gentle. rough looking hand felt surprisingly smooth. We were exchanging feelings of love and happiness. which made me think of the blobby whale figure from my childhood. I jumped from my bed and ran out the backdoor to see what had happened to scare them away like that. when quite abruptly. even elated to see me. and my curiosity took over. almost like it was alive. His sharp-nailed.

but not quite quick enough or smart enough to catch me. like there was some kind of power behind that eye. We stared at each other like old enemies. I knew I had seen it before. Without energy. it merely changes form. sometimes chasing me. I previously gave an example of creating knives when I felt threatened. our bodies are controlled by an intricate electrical system. depending on what the situation called for. a subtle energy that sustains life. I came to associate the eye with negative feelings. All forms of matter are created and controlled with energy. but it could never catch me. I focused my thoughts on the formation of the knife. drawing energy from around me. I have also created to use it for protection and for defense. I imagined a knife resting in the palm of my hand. Another very important fact to remember is that energy does not die. there is no life. 102 . In the case when I felt the need to defend myself and create a knife. The same can be done for any object. I also saw it during a frightening government visitation. In the alternate reality. I first concentrated on my hand. I would see the eyeball again. pulling it into a new form. and when it was in clear focus. As you may know. Once I had my hand consciously locked in focus. It seemed a formidable enemy. I have been able to manipulate energy in various forms. which I will relate in a later chapter. The idea is to be able to consciously focus your thoughts. I opened my fingers to reveal my open palm. The star people taught me about energy . I was learning how to protect myself. As I dealt with the new experiences of being chased or bothered by unwanted visitors.Invitation to the Self picked up feelings of strength. I looked down at my hand.

When I overloaded that bug with energy. With all the activity going on. I was pushing energy into it. well. I encountered beings that were not friendly in the slightest. I managed to draw yet more unwanted attention. As I got closer. but basically. I heard a deep. At times. If lightning strikes and a sudden rush of energy enters your television. rumbling noise and felt it pass through the ground under my feet. and then there were others who wanted information about my star friends. being in close contact with the star people and dealing with government visitation. That is how I killed the bug – I hit it with an abrupt overdose of energy. I first had to learn about the movement of energy and how to control it. When I short-circuited the “bug” in my arm. I had to draw energy from around myself when I wanted to create an object. There were some flying. Just think of when we have a thunderstorm and your television is plugged into an electrical outlet. One of the most important was creating a barrier or force field of protective light around myself like armor.Testing In order to create objects by reforming energy. This is actually the first thing you should do when going into a situation you aren’t sure of. I used energy manipulation in different ways. On one occasion in particular. and I did attract these negative entities from time to time. it became defunct. This can vary in different realities. Since I was some sort of oddity. beings were drawn to me for various reasons. It is a basic foundation of psychic self-defense in the physical world and one of bodily protection on the other planes of existence. some standing. The beings were emitting 103 . you may not have a television anymore. I was in the alternate reality walking down a dirt road when I spotted some non-human entities in the distance. There were entities that merely wanted to draw energy from me.

quickly scrambling inside and running for the bedroom. They wanted to know what I was all about.Invitation to the Self deep sounding vibrations from their chests and throat areas. unlike other ships I had seen. but about the guns they were waving around . but captured and taken to a “building” in the sky. I tried to leap up and take flight. and I was not prepared. and diverse species of star people. dodging from lasers. I ran away without looking back and found my house. They spotted me and quickly attacked. but they swiftly and easily grabbed my legs and pulled me down. as I also knew that being hit with one of those lasers would end it all. They had different types of weapons.the ones that shot yellow lasers. However. I feared for my life. They were small metallic discs that actually looked like they had smoke coming out the bottoms – very mechanical looking. Since they took an interest in me and I was not to be killed immediately. as this sound was making people keel over on the spot. some suited to kill humans. and saw their ships floating nearby. The most conscious part of the event came now. close to normal consciousness. I made my way back outside. I was not killed. I knew the creation of these weapons had a great deal to do with varying energy vibrations or frequencies of different life forms. I was very nervous. other life forms. Screaming uncontrollably. as they began to shoot yellow lasers into the room. very aware. because I was the only human that had tried to fly away from them. I was able to wake myself once I 104 . They were interested in me. not so much about them. I was scared out of my wits. the creatures were right behind me. The beings sighted me and began to take chase. covering my head and hoping for the best. Then I saw humans lying on the dirt road. I had the opportunity to worm my way out. I tried to hide in the far corner of the room.

As I woke. but if it got to be way too much for me to handle. They showed me things that would scare me. It’s over with. there was no way to avoid the situation. the star people would intervene and stop the lesson. In those training days. and how it was a problem for me. I could hear the lasers still shooting. That worked for a while. you can only let bad things build up for so long in your mind and then you have to face them. however. For a long time. Fortunately. They intensified my training. and I tried to stuff it into the back of my mind and cover it up with other thoughts. I knew that. You know. There is no escape from yourself. I would either be “captured” or the star people would gently take me out of the scene. I was given lectures on how fear controls people. They had tried to kill me. They made a horrible. but not forever.” I would tell myself that when I had an extremely difficult night. I was scared a lot of the time. unearthly noise that shattered the quiet of my bedroom. At times I might be running all night. this was training. all muscles tense as I woke. and I had no choice but to face them and deal with it. there were spiders practically 105 . that was just a nightmare. I was thrown into constructed fights and psychic battles in which I was forced to find creative methods of defending myself. I was terrified. Those thoughts ended up coming back to haunt me. trying to escape from an attacker and just get worn out. but I knew deep down that it had been an actual occurrence. lying there stiffly. I kept trying to tell myself. Why were there strange beings trying to kill me? I did not know. there was not a whole lot of that gentleness. “It’s okay. That doesn’t matter anymore. but the star people were aware it. When this happened.Testing found my concentration.

It got to the point where the spiders were obviously rubber or plastic. going into the alternate reality. The star people tried to make it look realistic. but you can learn how to manage it. I found two men in the living room of my house. however. After that. it did have something to do with what my perceptions were becoming. Of course. His face became angry and he swung at me. it was not easy to tell what was an actual attack and what was just a lesson. One evening. and I realized it had been another test. hitting the floor. I swiftly stabbed him in the abdomen. I was able to spot the fake settings instantly. It seemed they had been watching me for a while. I had only perceived them that way. It isn’t always easy to completely get rid of a fear. He crashed into me and I fell backwards. they whooshed away. they had never been a real threat to me. Being consciously aware in 106 .Invitation to the Self everywhere I looked. but they did not quite have the hang of creating sunlight and landscapes inside of UFOs. one of them rushed at me to attack. feeling that my breath had been knocked out. I quickly realized that I did not need to breathe here. I did not see spiders anymore. I laughed at them. I learned how to consciously control my fears. I ran out the front door and into my yard. Suddenly. I looked up and saw a familiar group of stars. and when they saw that I was in the alternate reality with them. In the early days. So when I saw that they were just toys. and I was not about to be slack because I suspected it was just set up. I simultaneously jumped up and created a dagger in my hand. so it does not inhibit your thoughts or actions. All this nightly activity happening in expanded levels of consciousness really got my curiosity up. After quite a lot of fighting. It took me a few years to be able to distinguish. He disappeared.

can be. The mind can do amazing things. Why couldn’t I lift the girl and bring her out with me? I could have done it if only I had remembered there is no weight in this alternate reality. so I reluctantly jumped out the window. She was extremely weak. One night I went into the alternate reality and flew around until I noticed some human-looking life forms walking around a complex of buildings. I jumped up and looked inside. so I took off running. but she was so heavy…she could not pull herself up. as soon as I landed. There was a window about six feet up. 107 . Here is where I got scared and lost my concentration. at least. There I saw a terrible sight – a girl. Another thing that was all too clear was that they used humans like me as a food source. Their intelligence was greater than mine. I circled back to the outer edge of the complex where I landed near the backside of a building.Testing new and strange places has drawn me into some bad situations where I have wandered into places where I just wasn’t welcome. but very happy to see that someone had come to rescue her. One of the beings spotted me. The buildings were all connected like a big maze. but did not come after me. I couldn’t stop there. Unfortunately. which was very clear. so I assume I did not seem threatening or worth the effort to go after. But of course. Why didn’t I just fly away? Because I forgot I could. I was curious. They had seen me. I anxiously burst through the window and climbed in the room to help her. I immediately turned and flew off. I thought it would be interesting to meet these other humans. Whatever you believe to be true. Then I heard someone coming. I realized they were not human at all. She slowly looked up at me. probably teenaged. there does not have to be. human. She was huddled in the corner near the window. I tried to lift her.

I started to run away from a highly intelligent creature that would have liked to eat me for dinner. I was desperately trying to think of what to do. simply because I did not know what I was doing. I stopped running and woke up. For days. Luckily. I made it to the chimney and tried to hold on. some of them rather large. and I did try. I cried for so long. The maze of buildings was difficult to navigate. People were standing below me 108 . being on the outside edge. I could not stop thinking about her and the look on her face. We were soon in a place outside the complex. I felt so guilty about leaving that girl behind in the complex.Invitation to the Self Instead. but I could not find my way. I was able to work my way out to a wooded area. zigzagging across the sky. and the roof was slippery. the creature was right behind me. I also experienced more visitations from star people that were not interested in being my friends. I was panting now. I cried all day. What good was all the training I was going through if I could not use it properly? What I did not know at the time was that I was wandering into random levels of reality. I felt bad about myself. I had a vivid dream in which I looked out my bedroom window and saw a red light in the distance. when I realized the being was no longer behind me. I ran into these types of situations way more than I wanted to. One evening. It was raining. I wanted to go back again. and the weakness in my leg muscles almost pulled me down. ones in which I had no business going to. I got the distinct impression he had turned into someone else’s dinner. I climbed out the window and onto the roof. a place that seemed to be wilderness. having lost my concentration. No matter where I went. I could not outrun him. I was scared. I began to see shadows of other creatures moving about.

I was outside on my roof.. I woke up. with bookshelves lining one of the walls. I was not aware at first. I realized they were hurting him on purpose. There were guards in the room who seemed to be star people. The guards returned shortly thereafter and went over to where the other human was lying. I picked up a nauseating feeling of dread and hopelessness. The UFO observed me and then flew upward. At one point. The situation was exactly as it had been previously. There were two other humans in the room. wondering what I had done wrong and why I was in prison. and I felt that his future was grim. I had been thrown into a large prison cell. they just watched the door. I saw a flash of light and the UFO looked like a meteor. They grabbed one of the other people and dragged him out of the room. as it had been in the dream.. They were very rough with him. I was confused and unable to focus clearly. full of holes. The roof was slippery and I was scared. I jumped up 109 . but the rest of the craft sat stationary. Exactly two weeks later. They were shouting at me and throwing things onto the roof in an attempt to aid me. the experience changed and I found myself hostage.Testing on the ground. I could not believe the things they were doing to him. trying to help me. but I did not have a very clear focus on them. They looked as though they had been drugged and were very groggy. nonetheless. I was lying on a “hospital bed” in this makeshift holding area that actually appeared to be some sort of study. torturing him. but then they turned on us. It was dark and gloomy looking. with a few small white lights that encircled the midsection. except this time a UFO hovered directly above me. also on beds. At that time. The lights were spinning. because I was groggy as well. and it was raining. This was not something I was used to seeing star people do. I slipped into the alternate reality. For a while.

but enough to make them leave the room for assistance. Once again. I fought them off. but I made it over and fought with the guards. not very well.Invitation to the Self to stop them. I felt so bad that I could not have done more to help him. I quickly managed to escape and find my way home. 110 . I was weak. My energy was very low. I cried. and I knew I had to get out of there fast. I wondered if the man left in the cell had been able to wake up as well. Their attention left the man and focused on me instead.

Training Part Two the secret government 111 .

My favorite thing to do was jump into the air and fly straight upward toward the night sky. preventing me from going beyond my limited range. it occurred to me that I was out-of-body and my “silver cord” was pulling me back. I’m sure it was a good thing – that way. I would fly. you are actually out-of-body. When you realize you are more than your physical self and you become free of the boundaries of physical law. and I knew I had the means to do so. It was as if an invisible rope were tied around my body. Every person has one. I became more interested in trying new things on my own. your spirit has left the shell of your physical manifestation for a short time while you are asleep. I wanted to explore and discover even more than what I was being taught by the star people. You can also leave your body while awake. Sometimes. If you have not heard. Apparently. I had some type of safety net installed in my system. My inquiring nature was captivated with fresh ideas and possibilities entering my awareness. I would get so far up and then get yanked backward into my body. the silver cord is what connects the spirit body to the physical body. Actually. I was not able to leave the Earth’s atmosphere. When I first started doing this. the silver cord breaks. After numerous failed attempts. but no matter when it happens. I was so curious about what was out there in space. With my curiosity getting me into so much trouble at night.Invitation to the Self With all the teachings going on. Whenever the opportunity arose. it can be a liberating experience. if you are aware enough of what is happening. I couldn’t go too far before I was ready 112 . when you have a very vivid dream. it can be a wonderful feeling. I was curious about everything. When you die.

It was so thrilling and new. I entered a vivid dream state where I was in my backyard. With great effort. I began swinging myself head over heels around the clothesline. That night. Shooting into the starry sky. the laughter came spilling out in a nervous. allowing my weight to hang from it completely. At that point. I spun out of control. I was able to see great detail. such as a watering can. I was fully aware of my thoughts and actions and the surrounding environment. slowly at first. but regardless of that fact. after many years. Obviously. I curled up into a fetal position as I spun. yet excited fashion. I enjoyed the feeling of weightlessness. I came into full consciousness. quite suddenly. in which fleeting images may come and go.The Secret Government to. This was truly exhilarating. and boy. My head was tucked 113 . I would chose an object. topsy-turvy and felt a twinge of panic begin to overtake me. I had never done anything quite like this. I was in a reality where gravity was not an issue. then faster and faster. Then I let myself wander over to the clothesline. finally. When I had it clearly in focus. especially on my own. I soon found myself leaving the ground and. flinging myself upward. I brought my feet up from the ground and pulled my knees toward my chest. and focus my eyes on it solely. I grabbed onto it and hung on. was that a surprise! It was certain that I was no longer in my physical body. One night however. just walking around and focusing on random objects. I wrapped my arms around my knees to pull them in close. uncontrollably hurdling through the night air toward the open sky. I managed to extend the boundary of how far my cord would let me go. as I began to swing myself back and forth. I also noticed that my concentration stayed on the watering can until I consciously turned it away – quite unlike a normal dream.

I could see from brief tumbling glimpses that the Earth was getting smaller. I saw that it resembled a huge rolling wave. I was flying at an accelerated rate of speed through the upper levels of the atmosphere. I then remembered my friends speaking about this cloud formation before. I had never made it this far on my own. It was not as dense or thick as I had expected it to be. I opened my eyes as wide as they could go. They treated it as a landmark while journeying. The term “Ocean Cloud” came to mind. I knew I had to take control of the situation. I slowly opened my eyes. The image was absolutely breathtaking. I instinctively slowed myself as I advanced upon a humongous cloud shape. it’s okay.” which calmed me a little. Upon closer inspection. pass right through it. It appeared to be a line of cumulous clouds floating in deep space. I continued my flight toward the Ocean Cloud. surprisingly. I didn’t want to chance losing the experience. but I was more interested in examining the cloud. I couldn’t chance coming this far and missing something! I was still moving at an extremely fast speed. 114 . and I squeezed my eyes shut tightly in fear. I knew I had left the Earth’s atmosphere and was heading into new territory. I was able to stop the hurdling motion. Slowly. I saw streaks of light blurring past and assumed they were stars. with concentrated thoughts. I stopped to take in the awesome sight and ponder its existence. I hadn’t even imagined making it this far. in fact. it did not take long to reach the cloud and. Traveling at the tremendous speed I was. I wasted no time in flying headfirst toward the heavens – this was my big chance! I did not look down anymore.Invitation to the Self in to my knees. However. “It’s okay. I realized I had also seen it before. I was so happy. attempting to take everything in. Clusters of stars were streaking by me. I began repeating to myself.

I saw no stars in the dark part of the sky. There was a dark orange glow behind the silhouettes of tall buildings. at the bottom in small print. suddenly. I kissed the ground and thanked God for bringing me here. wherever here was. With hot tears streaming down my face. sitting on the ground of a strange new place. I was still. but they were written like newspapers. One was entitled Earth Life. I frantically searched the papers for the name of this location. containing the daily headlines of news stories. a good distance from the enclosed city. and I thought that was odd. The title of the newspaper read “JjAjR. I was kneeling on a polished pebble surface. as the orange color took on a round shape that was enveloped by a dark purple extending and growing darker until the night turned black. I looked up and saw the skyline of a city. read. I was shown an image of two books. examining the skyline again. I felt as though I were inside a huge bubble. Then. Looking back down at the ground. afraid this state of consciousness would slip away from me at any moment. There seemed to be a bubble protecting the city. “as portrayed in Southern California. trembling nervously.” I quickly turned my focus back to the city. I saw what appeared to be a set of comic books. I was fully conscious.” I flipped the paper over and looked at the back cover. I 115 . My location was within the darkness. I could always go back to the Ocean Cloud – now was time to go forward as far as I could! I went further and further until I saw yet another cloud and flew through that as well. far. I could not believe my eyes. This was the ground…of what? I had left Earth long ago. that the whole place was. far from home.The Secret Government I came out the backside and kept going. I looked down and immediately saw two flashes of light in my mind. which.

and it turned into somewhat more of a vivid dream. two others arrived in a flying car. I was not completely conscious any longer. The being that approached – you’re going to love this one – looked like a “storm trooper” from the Star Wars story. What happened instead was that my state of consciousness changed.Invitation to the Self looked down at the paper I held in my hands. near the water. trying to escape someone. even though I knew that was a long shot. actually hoping to jump off the space cloud through which I came and out of this place. I was under a dock area. I noticed a low-lying spot nearby. I jumped heavily into this part. and was speaking into a walkie-talkie type object. I was still on my knees staring in awe. Overcoming the initial shock. A “white suit” yelled out at me. I attempted to stuff it into my back pocket. The next thing I knew. and took a leap into the air to fly off as quickly as possible. I was very scared. I looked for the paper I had put into my back pocket. After recording the experience. I was hoping that it might work. but there was nothing. A young boy came running under the dock. Suddenly. Luckily for me. however. It said. Wanting to save it. It was wearing a white armor suit. and I would have it when I got back to Earth. and I was disappointed that I could not have brought back more evidence. It was too weird. one of the beings in the white armor rushed under and killed the boy. of course. Otherwise. “I am scanning the area. “Hey! We don’t need any astral travelers here!!!” I woke up and began to write. just like I had seen in the Star Wars movies. someone approached the area. I really would have been in shock.” Before I could even think about what to do. sitting in a room 116 . I went back to sleep and into this realistic experience: I was in a government building.

I sat back down as she reentered the room. never to be seen again. and I saw papers spread out on the desk. On occasion. A lady in uniform was sitting there with me. I told her that I did not remember that dream. She had pen and paper for taking notes and remarked that she wanted to ask me “a few questions about the aliens. I found myself in various government installations being questioned. “I have to go now. With a calm expression.” She waited patiently for me to say something. and I began to understand what a “government psychic” was. and sometimes to take a skin sample and then leave. This seemed to be 117 . She wanted me to tell her about some of my dreams. I thought it was crazy. Interesting and strange creatures came to observe me. after witnessing a small UFO land in my yard. seemingly just to get a look. I acted like I didn’t know what she was talking about – then she showed me! She had a copy of one of my dream records! In my own handwriting! I was disturbed by that. and she got up and left me sitting alone. The growing visitation from the star people seemed to be drawing attention from different directions. but I did not speak. my mind quickly switched to an alternate state of consciousness where I was standing inside a very large building. Not all of the visitors were foreign either. the government people were also beginning to show more interest. made almost completely of windows.” I replied with.” and I got up and walked out. I went over to where she had been. but did not want the lady to notice. A voice called from another room." and The Guide Book to Alien Species. I began to feel like a circus sideshow. I was amazed by what I saw: "alien this" and "alien that. after experiencing a visitation. One evening.The Secret Government filled with what looked like airplane seats. So then she asked about my “most recent experience.

“I know. I did not have a good feeling about the situation. I had quickly grabbed a lifejacket and was heading outside to help rescue the crashed pilot. For the most part. I can see it all around you. "I am friends with the star people. at least not on Earth with a human piloting and all the American markings on it. carefully kneeling beside him and looking at him from above. and I saw another jet like the first one. and a being resembling a 3-foot tall humanoidtoad crawled out. this was not going to be a pleasant 118 . but a human was not piloting. trying to be friendly. A woman in uniform came into the room and said that she would like to speak to me before the others arrived. waiting for someone.Invitation to the Self an earthly building near the ocean. I was sitting in a conference area with a big screen television and rows of seats. I had the feeling she was a psychologist. proceeding to lie down on the floor near the far wall. I got the impression he was a soldier. His eyes were like little slits. I said to him. Almost immediately. He nimbly exited the water and entered the building. as everyone watched an unusual looking jet fly past the windows and crash into the ocean. This was a large office space with an arrangement of small rooms. but unfortunately. I had never seen an aircraft like it before. but he had been pulled out of the water already. I was in an Air Force building. mostly military personnel. but was testing it out. I was simply ignored. I could tell he was not from Earth and. I went over to see.” and he smiled and replied. very rough looking. and was being brought in the building. This jet also crashed into the ocean.” His skin was a greenish-brown color. I got the distinct impression the pilot wasn’t really sure how to fly it. I kept watching jets fly past the large windows. The room was filled with humans.

They hovered motionlessly. to forcefully attempt to get the information they sought. the outlook never seemed to be positive. Two shots were fired at me as I picked up speed and raced toward my parents’ house. looked up and smiled. then waved at them. One night during a vivid encounter. watching me. The black one had its side door fully open. Perhaps this is partly what my instruction with the star people had been for. One was black and two were green Army helicopters. they started sending trained psychics after me. “Hmmm…not very friendly. just across the field. Whenever I ended up in rooms with people wearing government uniforms that wanted to question me. I glanced back up to see what they looked like. flung the backdoor open. and 119 . I lowered my head in thought for a moment. It was not unusual to see black helicopters in the alternate reality and even during the day. to see what would happen. after they figured out that I was not going to talk to them voluntarily. and standing inside was a man wearing all black. I managed to talk my way out of the room and wake myself up.The Secret Government therapy session. Eventually. I lowered my head in thought again. Well. I walked out of the house and into the backyard to see three helicopters hovering in the sky above. I was pretty surprised and stopped in my tracks. are they?” I addressed the man pointing the gun at me. They mostly wanted to ask questions about the star people and my experiences with them. I decided to try and be nice to them. “Hey you!” and promptly gave him “the finger” and proceeded to run across the yard. and no one waved back. They wanted to know everything I could tell them about the star people. pointing a rather large gun at me. I jumped onto the steps. I started walking forward.

who had me by the arm. At times.” He hesitated and then said. the government people brought me out to a quiet. then proceeded to guide me through the nearby woods. The high-ranking military official. An older man. not feeling enough energy to do anything. were dragging them along. “So? What did you do wrong?” and I sadly answered. the situations were hard to handle and even got to the point of being thoroughly depressing. A group of soldiers. In this alternate reality event. At first. three star people and two of the human soldiers. and I heard the order to “take out the aliens” if they put up too much of a fight – they didn’t want to take a chance of them escaping. I met my father in the kitchen and breathlessly blurted out. I think the government people are here and they’re going to take me away. The government had captured three star people who were putting up quite a struggle. There was quite a ruckus of running and yelling. all dressed in green uniforms. held me by my left arm. in what appeared to be an Army uniform. I could see a large green Army truck piled with soldiers pull into the driveway. A small group of soldiers accompanied us. “Why? What did you do?” “Dad. I stood there in shock with my mouth hanging open.” He replied with. A helicopter hovered above. wooded area. all mixed 120 .Invitation to the Self rushed into the house. and I saw people run inside as we advanced. “I know things the government doesn’t want me to know.” From the kitchen. I watched in horror as commotion ensued and the helicopter opened fire on the star people and the soldiers dragging them. There were people and animals living here. “Dad. We approached an old farmhouse. Five people ended up dead. we stood on a hill and watched from a distance. and I woke up. My heart sank when I realized what was going on. I told you before…I have star friends.

Once again. I remembered that it had taken me many years of trying to achieve flight myself. During quite a few conflicts. I woke up crying. it astounded me. I wanted to share what I was learning. The military personnel knew this farmhouse was here. At that point. Every now and then. of course. They were very sad. I began teaching classrooms of people how to fly. this time. It was not just protection or insight for myself. They were trying to hide from us. Sometimes I just saw them standing outside a window of the classroom. helping me with the teaching. I used my empathic skill to tell the man how the beings felt. the star people were with me. The fortunate thing for me was that even the government psychics did not know how to fly – at least the ones I had encountered so far. I felt very bad about myself. The problem was keeping my 121 . Almost like I had no control over it. I knew the star people were teaching me new skills for a reason.The Secret Government breeds – hybrids. or going out-of-body. They knew they were part of an experiment. and had never even thought of trying. I just wanted to throw-up. When I was dreaming about flying. and I suspect it was a government operation. I was completely on my own. flying up into the trees and even higher. and that their lives were no more meaningful than that. in a way that I could not fully explain. smiling at me. The official wanted me to help him. by telling him how the hybrids felt and what they were thinking. and then at times. for aiding the government people. I evaded my attackers by taking to the air. I felt sick to my stomach. they were doing their own genetic experimentation. Some were slower learners than others and. I felt so happy and free that I started to teach other people how to fly in the alternate reality. I met so many people who did not know they could fly. but for others as well.

We looked up toward the night sky and saw defined. They were evidently elite. The star people. As we were apparently moving into conscious awareness outside a group of small buildings. as I have already written. The group I was in watched helplessly as red. concentrated beams of light streak across. halting in certain places. If my concentration slipped. who were conducting this activity from above. By no means was my skill at avoiding the attackers perfected. Often. glowing outlines appeared around different types of military craft.Invitation to the Self thoughts on flying and not focusing on the fear of being captured. as though they were targeting. I had a mindboggling encounter with a powerful race of star people that had its own trained soldiers. well-trained soldiers that let nothing stand in their way. I thought about what I could have done in a better way. Shortly after the “government hybrid” incident. the government people would get the best of me and get their information or forcibly have me aid them in some way. The group I was with decided to hide in a nearby bunker – 122 . but also from the government psychics who were unknowingly teaching me how to defend myself against them. a lack of faith in myself or feelings of fear would cause me to slowly fall from the sky. Every time this happened. almost overwhelming. I ended up learning not just from the star people who were making an effort to train me. I was standing with a group of other humans inside a military base on Earth. some movement caught our attention. my flight would suffer. The intensity was awesome. Then we heard the explosions and witnessed many different types of land and air vehicles being blown to smithereens. Red arrows of light moved silently and swiftly. now sent troops to the ground that began marching in our direction.

The Secret Government we scrambled inside quickly. and wearing loose fitting white garments. and began with someone questioning me about the star people. The conversations were usually brief. thinking that maybe I would be able to decipher it all later. They were extremely powerful. In fact. Most of the time. I just tried to write everything down. I was so confused about what was going on. There were always so many different connections between the star people and the government. and the talk would end up with me asking them questions. On occasion. it always got turned around. I had never seen anything like these star people before. I had encounters in which the government was capturing UFOs and. I spoke with government personnel on the telephone. thin. like desert clothing. but did not harm us. I do not know why I was shown this. Their heads and faces were covered by white cloth as well. I got the feeling that this race of beings may actually be raised just to be soldiers – perhaps another biological. I held a small. In the alternate reality. and it seemed to take no exertion on their part to come down and demolish everything in their path. perhaps it was just to let me know what they were capable of. I would be witness to this. They looked very much alike. Somehow. Trees encircled the open space. lap top computer in 123 . I was speaking with NASA employees. each about 5-foot-9. The star people seemed to have their own questions. genetic undertaking. On one rare occasion. almost like we weren’t even there. I was standing in an open field under the starry sky. giving me a secure feeling. The soldiers stormed in and smashed everything. at times. they paid no attention to us at all. concerned for our lives at that point.

It did not seem. I did not realize it right away. and no one was doing very much explaining. I was mixed up in something I did not understand. so I got rid of them by pushing a button on the computer. and examined the men standing there. it seemed I had created a bit of interest in the UFO/abduction phenomenon at the A. What came up on the large screen was their real names. hobbies. After viewing all the information. likes and dislikes. however. etc. so I decided to keep him. I went by my gut instinct. I was beginning to feel as though I were in the middle of a very sticky situation. the star person near me said that I had the choice to “keep” the men or “throw them away. Each time I did this. depending on the circumstances. a white light streaked across the night sky. He was allowed to leave the area. but standing next to me was a tall. Since their readers 124 . who was a bit younger. all of whom worked undercover for the CIA. His eyes were wide with fright and sweat was beading on his forehead. Wherever I ended up. I had remembered speaking to him on the telephone before. yellowish star person who was guiding me.E.R. that I had much choice in the matter. I met three men there. He had been polite to me in the past. The two older men seemed to be very shady characters to me. (Edgar Cayce Foundation). I took the men’s names and typed them into the computer.” I wasn’t sure exactly what that meant. and directly in front of me was a large screen mounted into the ground. I tried to use my best judgement and make the best decisions possible. stood nervously in anticipation.Invitation to the Self my hands. The editor of Venture Inward magazine contacted me about the letter I had sent to their pen pal section. Meanwhile. and a man disappeared. The third man. looked over their information.

One evening. including former government employees. or maybe my imagination was way too overactive. The events were many. but these were thoughts that happened when I felt alone and different. they also seemed to have a lot of their own knowledge on the subject. I met with two lovely ladies who conducted the interview at my house. and would soon create enough interest for a UFO conference to be held at the A. I sometimes wondered whether I was just losing my mind.E. in the same spot. I had a vivid dream that there were two clouds in the sky all day. It has been like putting together pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. It was published in 1992. Towards evening. unprovoked attacks from the government psychics. although not in-depth. More people were speaking out about alien abduction and UFOs. Though I felt much happiness with the publishing of the article. Experiences revolving around government involvement continued in the alternate reality. I gladly accepted. headquarters in Virginia Beach. I was still dealing with frequent visitations and unwelcome. I knew very well that my experiences had all been very real. There was an unexplainable connection between UFOs and the government. It was wonderful to share my experiences. and I hoped the article would reach people who needed to see it. The good part was that now I had a supportive husband and my parents were aware of the visitations. I also knew that my analytical mind would not try to make sense out of these irrational events if there was nothing to it.The Secret Government appeared to be interested in the subject. I could see they were not 125 . but none really giving me the answers I was looking for. At the same time these people wanted information from me. I was asked to do an interview for an article to be published in the magazine.R.

“go away. but spaceships. they thanked me and gave me a copy of the questions and answers. The questioning continued as well. and fell back to sleep quickly. a man with a video camera was asking me about the scars on my hands. but this third one had NASA written on it. and they surely were not sensitive to anyone’s feelings. which I assumed to be experimental projects. My heart sank as I looked down at my hands and saw the scars and suddenly felt as though I’d been tortured. “Oh! How many aliens have you seen at one time?!” I said that I did not really know. One night. He made some comment and the guy with the camera suddenly figured it out and said. I was in a courtroom. the government had its own UFOs. 126 . and I felt as though I were being interrogated and watched relentlessly. Another ship slowly flew over to join the others. and a man was standing on top of it. I answered all their questions. The government people were not subtle about anything. I was very tired. Another man was with him. what appeared to be a UFO would turn into a helicopter being flown by government personnel – perhaps there was holographic imaging involved or psychic manipulation to achieve various images. A few nights later. and the other man said that it was more like 3. It looked just like them. however. I had this traumatic experience: Just as I was drifting off to sleep.” and then wake up. and when it was finished. I glanced over toward the side of the bed and saw a man sitting there! I was scared senseless. maybe 500.Invitation to the Self clouds. on the stand. In one experience. Their questions were direct and straight to the point.000. Sometimes. I barely had enough energy to move my lips and whisper. On a number of occasions. and two government men were questioning me. and he already seemed to know what they were from.

I did not have time to run again. I cannot recall the entire conversation. but there was a connection there. but he helped by giving me a “trigger” that would aid me in remembering past visitations. I knew that was a bad place to hide. “okay…I guess. He began to talk about aliens. and even though I was not happy about sitting next to the guy who was going to blow my head off. He said that he was working for someone. Instead of concentrating on his task. but at least I was out of the bedroom.” I started to talk about how nice the weather was. I thought about the giant eyeball image. He sat down next to me. how are you?” With a puzzled and hesitant look he replied. I sat up in the bed and looked out the window. This took a lot of my energy. I kept talking about anything and everything until I came to the topic of his occupation. I got a feeling that it wasn’t exactly the government. He went on to say that the man who had appeared on my bed was called “Beethoven. 127 . an agency. He immediately found me and held the gun to my head. and that I could see all the stars. previous experiences that I had recalled only parts of or had not remembered at all. So there I was. I also knew that the man with the gun was coming after me. I heard him enter the house. sitting under my dining room table with a killer. hiding under the table. I quickly smiled and blurted out. the sky being so clear. and I woke up. His gun disappeared. as I struggled for an idea of how to save myself. What a picture.The Secret Government After going into another state of consciousness. “Hi. he focused on my face and my speaking. I saw a man outside with a gun.” which was a code name. I rolled out of bed and swiftly made my way into the dining room. I saw flashes of memories run across my mind.

I had previously seen it while in the alternate reality. This encounter brings my thoughts back to the earlier experience of when I saw the triangular pulsing light.” over and over again and eventually woke up. shining on us. I was in my backyard with another person.” This seemed to be some type of experiment run by the government people. but the government people did not know what I was talking about. I was once again leaving the waking world and slipping into another state of consciousness. I could still see the lights that were in the experiment room. I tried to keep myself awake. It was shaped somewhat like a bench with metal sides and a midsection that lit up. which I had a word for. and I thought it was old and kind of primitive. the lights on the ceiling above us shone down like spotlights. in fact. sore and throbbing. Soon.Invitation to the Self I was afraid to go back to sleep after that. it hurts. The other three humans acted as though they had been drugged. but I was just too worn out. and I didn’t feel too spiffy myself. and my legs were forcibly drawn apart. “It hurts. When we four humans were sitting on our models. one was a train. and we were trying to escape from a swarm of stinging bees. 128 . I kept saying. What I recall happening after that seems to be a screen memory. a few of them were standing around. We each sat upon a “mode of transportation. I soon discovered that I was in a well-lit room with three other humans. the third I forgot. Looking around myself. One of the “modes of transportation” was a model of an airplane. I sat on my model and waited for something to happen. and mine was something that I had never seen while awake. also no “alien” presence on that occasion. My legs were all bit up and throbbing from supposed bee stings. I asked them if they had the newer model.

I then saw what appeared to be a train flying over the house. near a window. I saw my daughter walking toward some strange looking people. I ducked my head down. I was standing on a sidewalk down the street from my house. and the phone cord had wrapped 129 . who was about five years old at the time. It’s one thing for them to attack me. but quite another when it is one of my children. but she did not come. The scene changed and I was in another room in the large house. It was beginning to be too much to handle. but the distance was getting longer and I was not making any headway. I got up to run after her. afraid we would be hit. to protect her. I fell to the floor with her underneath me. It took a lot of determination. and it sounded like it was heading our way. The people smiled evil grins at me.The Secret Government The intensity of the attacks was stepping up. I tried relentlessly to dial. and I was starting to get worn out from it all. which sounded more and more like a train as it got closer. running from attackers and trying to help others who were being provoked. We were standing at the far end of a long hallway. but I finally made it to the end of the hallway and into the room. I was scared out of my mind. Quite suddenly. It was a roaring type of sound. I was in a large house with my oldest daughter. In one encounter. I did not know where we were and I was concerned. darting into an open doorway. I became terrified and grabbed my daughter. I found myself struggling through many nights. My daughter jumped up and ran toward the opposite end of the hallway. I called to her. but the numbers would not work. I began to look for a door so we could escape. I heard a loud noise. I saw a telephone and ran for it. I scrambled desperately. but nothing functioned properly.

I looked toward the stars. tripping every now and then on the uneven sidewalk. Oddly enough. I was only a few feet off the ground and travelling very slowly. They did not know I could see them. one I had felt before. in her bed. exploring. which I feebly attempted. It gently held me and pulled me skyward. having a good laugh at my misfortune. a bright white light flew down to me. about 60 feet up. a group of military personnel were hiding behind some parked cars.” Instantly. I did what I love to do – go flying across the Earth. The military people thought it was a riot. 130 . I gathered up enough strength and concentration to rip the cord from my neck. My daughter was fine. I was laughing heartily. I took off without stopping to look back. I knew where I was. when feeling this unrestrained. cows in pastures…I felt so much happiness. and having a wonderful time. As usual. I saw hills and lakes and forests. The thought occurred to me to start flying. as I was running and sobbing. and then prairies.Invitation to the Self itself around my neck. I felt myself leaving my physical body. Grief stricken with thoughts of my daughter. Why was I having so much trouble? Why would anyone want to purposely hurt me? All this to acquire information? My mind was filled with questions and very few possible answers. I woke up crying. One evening as I drifted off to sleep. The cord wound itself tighter around my neck and I began to choke and gasp. “Please…help me…take me home. Somehow. towns of different sizes. I feared for my life. This was a very freeing sensation. I absolutely loved the adventure of leaving the shell of my physical body and freely flying about. but only on a few occasions. I jumped into the air but was not doing well at all – I had lost my confidence. I flew across fields of green. and knew the way home. It turned me in the right direction and escorted me home. huge fields of wheat.

A building hidden within a thick forest attracted my attention. and this time was no exception. In all directions. A couple of them had walkie-talkies and were speaking quietly into them. I turned to run. government people were closing in on me. anticipating my capture. In desperation.” A brilliant white flash lit the air as a UFO was revealed in the clear sky above me. No sooner had I landed than a group of people jumped out of the building. away from danger. as I was gently lifted off the ground. Then I looked down to see those on the ground. Some of the personnel began to walk slowly but deliberately toward me. My curiosity always took me to new and exciting places. without even consciously knowing what I was doing. They told me to “hold still. I saw the silver disk pulling me upward. I wish you could have seen the baffled looks on the government people’s faces…. Startled. I flew down to the place. exploring the wide-open spaces that I had never seen before. I started to cry. I was panicking and had forgotten that I could fly. surrounding me. 131 .” I had become quite afraid. A beam of beautiful blue light encircled me. “Help me.The Secret Government thoroughly enjoying the sensation of soaring through the sleeping countryside. Looking skyward. I raised both hands and my face to the sky and quietly whispered. landing on the ground. Oh. and more people emerged from the trees behind me.

Invitation to the Self 132 .

Training Part Three transitional phase 133 .

“No. When we are awake we think. is it really happening? Is it REAL? Most people would say. When we are asleep we think. Thought transcends the physical world. Hello? Wake up people. that didn’t happen! It’s not real! Thoughts are not real because I can’t grab them. That’s not real. which gives no leeway for metaphysical experience.” Let me ask you something: When a thought runs through your mind. an event that occurs while you are asleep is also real. and we cannot see a thought. of course not. whether it is in a normal dream state or in another state of mind. It may not be physically real but. it is real. When we are outof-body we think.” Too many people are tied up in the notion that if it isn’t physical. nonetheless. It is a matter of fact that we think all the time. yet we know that thought is “real. When we are in an alternate reality we think. They’re not physical. How do we expect to progress in science if we do not open up some doors of the mind? Just as a thought is real no matter where you are or what state you are in.” Our way of science teaches us to use the approved scientific method. I feel confident in saying that for the most part. so they’re not real. When we imagine we think. Anything that cannot be concretely pinned down by the five senses is not actually happening…. do you know that it’s really happening? A thought has no substance or mass that we can hold onto.Invitation to the Self When an event occurs in another state of consciousness. an abduction experience or visitation by the star people does not take place on the physical plane of reality. so do you say to yourself. “No. Because 134 . From my personal background. then it’s not real. When we are dreaming we think.

I believe the majority of encounters occur in what I have termed the alternate reality. I believe that staying in the physical world for an extended period of time would prove to be quite difficult for them by slowing them down and limiting their actions. However. REAL experience. I do believe that star people have the capability to visit humans within the physical plane for a limited period of time. but for the majority of cases. I have been fortunate enough to have experienced and recalled apparent “transitional phases” of switching from the physical reality to the alternate reality and vice versa.Transitional Phase consciousness is capable of expanding. a meeting place of sorts. this does not discount the possibility of physically being abducted and missing for three days. the star people have an easier time maneuvering and doing their work while in the alternate reality.” Therefore. they do not have as much control on the physical plane as they do on other planes of existence. but I am working on a theory. the star people have to lower their vibrations while abductees/contactees have to raise theirs to meet “half way. that since our bodies vibrate on different frequencies. In other words. I have been told a number of times. Here are a few instances that I would like to present to you: 135 . The truth of the matter is that I do not know how it happens every time – the methods do not seem to be consistent. What I am saying is that an individual who is consciously flying around in a silver disc with the star people may physically still be lying in bed. humans are taken from the physical reality and transported to an alternate plane of existence. They are actually moved from their physical bodies into another level of the self – a consciously aware.

I realized that even though I felt so close to a normal state of consciousness. as though an invisible pole went through my midsection and I was circling around it. I did not panic. as I am always yearning to know more. I felt very much awake and aware of my surroundings. Interestingly. I’m not sure why. which were also familiar. like static electricity tingling throughout my body. maybe it was nervous laughter. I was laughing. so I knew it was just in my own head and no one else in the house would be able to hear it. I felt and could hear the crackling of what seemed to be static electricity. They observed me as if I were part of a scientific experiment and they were recording the data. I began spinning in circles. I certainly wasn’t having fun. For some strange reason. There was a very bright light and I saw three tall star people standing nearby watching. my memory came into clear focus while I was already in the alternate reality.Invitation to the Self In this case. I heard the beeping noise in my head and was spinning uncontrollably. I walked toward the window to more closely inspect the red lights when I was suddenly lifted upward and into a horizontal position about five feet off the floor. I knew the star people were doing this. so I was patient and just let it happen. I was not quite there. I was feeling a type of energy. I did not dwell on this idea however. The speed was so great that I could not control the muscles in my face. as I became distracted by a loud beeping noise which had abruptly begun sounding off inside my head. permeating my entire being. They were in the living room with me. I had experienced this before. standing in my living room. I saw that they were wearing clothing – what resembled layered robes. I could also see little red lights behind the curtain and just outside the window. Then I felt my 136 .

I continued to feel the tingles all over. Luckily. that I might not like her if she took on her true form. I went back to sleep. so she did it . and my body was lying there without me…. I approached a star person and asked her to turn back into her “real self. They were disguised as humans so they would not scare me or the other humans they had onboard the craft. One ship landed and the star people came out onto the lawn. just to know that I was awake and in my body again. I had returned to the alternate reality. When I felt safe enough. still giving off the same type of energy. like she was a child. and I really hadn’t given it a second thought. I felt that I had no control over the situation. like I have so many times after visitation.” She replied that she did not want to frighten me. It was a prickly type of feeling. The disoriented humans were being escorted out of the craft to be washed off. but I was not in it! At that point I became very frightened. Four UFOs were hovering in the sky above. as I returned to my physical form. Apparently. and carried her around the yard while we spoke.” I was unable to move for about a minute. they had just been picked up from elsewhere and they needed to be clean to stay on the ship. I was overjoyed to feel my blankets and my pillow with my hands.she transformed into a 3-foot tall star person.Transitional Phase physical body lying on the bed. I picked her up. I told her it was okay. it was not long before I felt my two “selves” merge. and was going out the front door of my house. but when I did. not too much unlike when your foot falls asleep and you get “pins and needles. still the same spirit. I told her about the beeping noise and the spinning I had 137 . I was very happy to see the ships and ran forward to greet them. She seemed to be fine with that.

She casually replied that it would be about a month or so. Slowly. My immediate reaction was to wonder how the heck I got out there and why I was just sitting there by myself in the middle of the night. the radio came on and started making a sharp-sounding beeping noise. A few months later. I thought that someone had grabbed the edge of my blanket and was shaking it violently. Suddenly. but I didn’t even want to try doing that. and with a smile she exclaimed. Then another noise began in the back seat. I was concerned about being gone and my family missing me. “Oh! I was just warming you up!” We prepared to board the ship. It was a flapping sound. It got louder and faster. I was facing the wall. the sound subsided and I was lying on the bed. I only heard the noise. I was in the alternate reality. unable to move for a few minutes. I had a similar experience. almost like someone was briskly shaking a blanket in the air. but the time on my clock later showed only three or four hours gone from the night. I turned and looked behind me.Invitation to the Self experienced. Finally. I was afraid to even breathe. I tried to say “what?” but I could not move my lips to speak. which was parked in the driveway. I was scared and could not turn to look. sitting in the passenger’s seat of my car. There was 138 . attempting to make some sense of it. so I asked the star lady how long we would be. and I tried my best to discern what was being said. I did not feel a breeze from this. I was so afraid. I gradually felt myself lying on my bed. I felt as though I could not move or open my eyes. I leaned toward the radio. as it seemed to be a language of beeps. with my back towards the open room and the flapping noise still sounding off behind me.

I was having a restless night. After the light flashed by me. unafraid. I awoke to find that a painting I had been working on had vanished. In fact. Once again I wondered how it would do them any good in the alternate reality. and the blankets did not appear to have been moved at all. nothing seemed to be out of place. Another instance very similar to this one occurred about a year later. which included bright flashes of light. I knew there had to be connections. I was coming to realize that the visitations were not taking place physically. Slowly. who liked the painting so much. light-skinned star people busily scurrying around me. It was a picture of a star person and a little girl in the woods on a snowy evening. The illumination became extremely bright and the craft seemed to explode into a ball of energy. I stood in the glow. while watching a UFO land in my front yard. my memory had a lapse. at the time. I was reading a group of papers about different types of star people while the little guys were going about their very important business. It was very early 139 . the craft began to spin and hum. so I just stood back and let the encounter happen. these two worlds were separate. I knew these people were my friends. I was later told that the star people.Transitional Phase nothing there. I experienced more of what may possibly have been types of transitional phases. had taken it for themselves. creating a yellowish-white light around itself. A flash of brilliant light flooded the yard and house. One day. but I could not understand how I would have physical scars on my body in the morning when I woke. On one occasion. whatever that was…. but my culturally conditioned mind could not fathom how the physical world could be connected to other levels of existence. To me. not able to sleep. I next recall sitting in my kitchen with 15 to 20 very small.

Invitation to the Self in the morning, and I was lying there, staring at the ceiling. Suddenly, I was in an alternate state of reality, sitting up in the bed, with someone sitting next to me. I did not pay attention to who was there. Whoever it was handed me a photo album to look at. I started flipping through the pages. There were some pictures of an old friend of mine, so I looked closely at the photos, and I clearly remember a curious look coming across my face as I realized that something was odd about the pictures. I promptly blurted out, “These are pictures of star people!” I then looked over to the person sitting next to me and realized it was a star person. Instantly, his body became of flash of white light. Within moments, a second flash came, completely filling the room. I was dumbfounded. My mouth fell open as I felt a change overcoming me, a sort of numbness. I quickly felt myself lying in the bed, my muscles limp and unable to move. I was shocked from the abruptness of it all, and just lay there motionless, unable to move for a good long time, probably two minutes, and that’s a long time when you’re paralyzed! As you’ve probably noticed from other accounts that I have recalled in the book so far, there have been frequent moments of feeling tingly and unable to move after waking from visitation. I believe this phenomenon has to do with the process of moving from one level of reality to another. As time went on, and I became accustomed to the procedures of the visitation experience, the tingly feelings and the paralyzation upon waking seemed to subside in intensity. What began to happen instead was me trying to do it on my own…. One night after a visitation, I woke suddenly in the bed and, for some reason, felt that I had woke too soon…I wanted to see the

Transitional Phase star people a bit longer. I knew they were in their UFO far above my house, getting ready to leave. With great determination, especially being wide-awake now, I closed my eyes and repeated to myself over and over again, “I am awake and on the ship.” I started to feel tingly, and I got scared at first, but I kept going. I could not believe what was happening. My body became so tingly that I could hardly feel it anymore. I kept up my little chant as I began to feel the star people nearby. I was beginning to make out their forms, and I realized that I was coming up through the bottom of the spacecraft! I saw at least three star people staring at me with disbelief. One was sitting in a chair and had started to get up to see what was going on. At that point, when they realized what I was doing, I felt myself promptly returning to my physical body. Before long, I fell into a vivid dream and was talking to a friend who I could not see, only hear. This individual told me I had just been “dematerializing” my atoms, and that I had almost made it onto the spacecraft. The star people saw me and sent me back right away. References to realities other than the physical were brought up from time to time. I do not think I was expected to understand it all, but as long as I had the notion that life goes on in other dimensions and planes of existence, I was doing well. Sometimes the information came during visitation, and then at times it was to be found in regular dreams and visions. In one of these particular instances, I was in my backyard with family and friends, having a picnic. Nobody, besides myself, seemed to notice the yellow craft hovering above the house. I smiled and waved to it, and it promptly sent out a small “probe” towards the ground. At that point, everyone could see what was going on. Of course, they focused on the funny glass thing that had just

Invitation to the Self floated out of the sky, and completely ignored the spaceship above the house. I had seen numerous probes coming from ships before, so I knew what they were about. Sometimes they brought messages and sometimes they had something like cameras in them to gather information. This probe was probably the largest I had ever seen, about 2-foot across and 1-foot wide in the middle, tapering to the edges. It was a smoky grey color, and had what appeared to be little lumps for eyes, positioned on its topside. It reminded me of a stingray. The family children ran over in excitement, wanting to “catch” the strange object now resting on the ground. They threw plastic bags on top of it, in an attempt to bury it. I broke out laughing and said to them, “You’d better watch out! When that thing’s ready to take off, it’s gonna zoom out of here!” They quickly removed the bags and the probe flew away, apparently to escape the overly zealous kids. It returned a few minutes later, landing on the ground near me. The yellow craft followed it, floating about eight feet off the ground, approximately 10 feet in front of me. Two star people showed themselves, and I recognized them as friends of mine. They explained that many different dimensions existed simultaneously, side by side. They wanted me to understand that our world was undergoing a change, from the 3rd to 4th dimension. “As you change, you will be able to see other people living in the 4th dimension.” They went on to say that they were able to view all of my dimensional selves at the same time, and I got the impression there were at least 10 dimensions to see. After the brief discussion, they flew off. The star people know that life exists in a multitude of realities, and they have made great efforts to get this point across to me. I believe

Transitional Phase that many other contactees have had similar experiences. Of course, knowing that other levels of reality exist is one thing and reaching them is another. I am of the opinion that the transitionary phase I have been speaking of is an effect of moving from one reality to another. The only knowledge I really have about the transitional phase comes from the experience of doing it, which does not mean that I actually understand how it works. What I do know is this: The physical world is based on energy – energy that we have the ability to manipulate. Our physical bodies are energy based. Just like a fingerprint, each of us has a unique, individual energy frequency that our bodies vibrate on. This frequency correlates with the body’s energy level and can be manipulated. This is a long shot, but here it goes: it may be that the star people use electromagnetic radiation to speed up the body’s energy rate. This radiation comes in the form of intense white light, which transfers its energy to electrons, bumping them up to higher levels. The faster the electrons move, the higher the energy vibration becomes. In order to leave the physical reality, the electrons need to be moving at a rate beyond the speed of light. Accelerating electrons beyond the speed of light enables the Spirit to leap into the next world – a quantum leap, if you will. The speeding up of the body’s electrons acts as a catalyst for interdimensional travel. Electromagnetic radiation can also be used to slow down an electron’s movement rate, bringing the individual back to the physical reality and normal level of awareness. This transformation shifts your awareness into another conscious level of reality; you simply shift your awareness, but do not carry your physical form along with you. The speeding up of the body’s energy

Invitation to the Self gives you a boost; a momentum to make that leap of awareness. This is, I believe, what the star people do when “abducting” people from their beds at night. When I tried this maneuver on my own and brought myself onto the spaceship above my house, I willed myself there through concentrated thought. It wasn’t so difficult for me to do it on my own; all I had to do was concentrate and there I was on the ship with some very surprised star people. Why was it so much easier for me to just think about it and there I was? I have control over my own body, with the use of an extremely powerful tool – thought. We know that matter has mass and light has mass. They exist in the material world. Energy has no mass and thought has no mass. Their boundaries surpass the material world. In other realities, mass and light take on an energetic form, not a physical one, however, the form of thought remains constant whether in the physical world or in an alternate reality. Thought, therefore, can work as a bridge between worlds. The energy we are made of may be manipulated; we can change its form. We are much more than our physical selves; we exist on many levels, and when our physical forms perish, our spirit energy still survives. What the star people do is manipulate a person’s energy so that a part of the self leaves the physical form and travels to an alternate reality and, I believe, they also have the means to take a person physically into that alternate reality as well. Another concept to understand is that every level of the self affects all levels of the self. This explains the physical scars that abductees/contactees find on their bodies. They do not necessarily receive these scars on the physical plane; what occurs on one level of the self directly affects all levels, including the physical self. This helps

even though I was sure I had done it during the night. I had no choice but to deal with it or completely and utterly lose my mind. of course. when truthfully. The videotape. I do not know why this was done. Whatever it was meant to be. watching the world around us fall apart. and I believed I was fully conscious and aware of what was happening at the time. when I watched the tape the next morning. I never saw myself physically sit up or leave the bed. I was with my family. unthinkable change. As this type of experience evolved. What actually transpired was that my sitting up happened in another state of existence in which I was conscious. I was placed in situations where I was forced to deal with this stupendous. They believe the events happen in the physical reality. We each have the ability to exist consciously in other dimensions and planes of existence. but not in my physical form. I was brought into events where I became witness to the entire world shifting from the physical reality into an alternate reality before my very eyes. Remember the visitation that I knew would happen beforehand and I tried to videotape it? Well. that abductees/contactees are not able to explain. Perhaps it was a test of some sort or just a learning experience. Wind and rain pelted us as we stood on a dock watching ships load their hulls with supplies and head out to 145 . could not pick this up. the more I traveled to other levels of reality. It was very clear in my mind. During one of these rare occasions. The more I learned with the star people.Transitional Phase to explain the bizarre occurrences that happen during visitations. since they feel fully aware and conscious. and they are very much as real as the material world we focus on now. they may be experiencing the visitation in an alternate reality with waking consciousness still intact.

Invitation to the Self sea. For some reason, they could no longer stay in port. Roads and bridges were falling apart. People could not get from one place to another. They were giving up on hope, killing each other, and running around like mad zombies searching for life. My family and I hurried to our house, looking for that safe haven we had always expected to be there. We crowded into one room, holding onto each other. The window before us revealed a dark sky with the moon slowly rising. It was full and bright, casting shadows in the room, giving us a feeling of familiarity – the cycles of the moon on time and on schedule. Suddenly, it appeared as though an eclipse was beginning to cover our lovely moon, bathing it in an eerie dark red. This happened very quickly and was over. As I took in a sigh of relief, it began again. The moon glowed a dark red color and then it passed, bringing back the white light of the full moon, but lasting only temporarily, as the crimson wave swept across the moon again, this time remaining. As my entire family stared in awe and disbelief, the dark red moon literally blinked out of existence. In its place appeared a grid of blue, green, and yellow light…just a flat square of color in the night sky. Somehow, in a monotonous slur, I uttered the words, “I heard someone speak of this before, but I did not believe them.” We watched, unmoving, as the square rolled onto its side to become a diamond shape. As it made this turn, the grid pattern extended on all sides, creating a crystalline structure. In all my experience, there has never been such a moment of sheer terror as this. To watch the moon dissolve into an alien, crystalline device meant to me that my entire world was shattered. In every other traumatic experience, there was at least a familiar humanoid shape or

Transitional Phase some recognizable lines of landscape; some form of semblance to hold onto. I now existed in a foreign, seemingly unfriendly environment. In a void of all rational thought, my mind went blank and I simply stared at the unbelievable evidence of my reality gone, replaced with a horrendous monstrosity. The children started wailing and screaming. This snapped me out of my stupor, and I knew in that moment it was up to me to hold us together. I was the only one who had any type of experience related to this at all. I shoved my fear to the back of my throat and rubbed the girls’ hair, telling them, “It’s okay, we’ll figure this out. It will be all right,” not having an inkling of a clue how…but what else could I do? This was the most extreme case of witnessing the transition from one reality to the next, but it was not the only one. I had, on numerous occasions, ended up in an alternate reality where energy was seen and represented in color, and the sky was filled with geometric shapes. In time, being exposed to this new landscape made me somewhat familiar and more at ease with the situation. I came to know, in that particular level of reality, that energy was highly “suggestible.” It was so easily manipulated that I was actually frightened by having that much control. Perhaps I felt that by changing too much around me, I could undermine the foundations of a recognizable reality so much that I would bring myself into a seriously bizarre environment that I could not even comprehend, and I would become trapped there. What I think was really happening was that the star people were introducing me to a new environment. My fear was overpowering at first, so much so that my thoughts could not even come together in an orderly fashion. However, over time, it advanced to the point where I was able to observe and wonder about the “rules” of this new reality

Invitation to the Self and how they could be used and manipulated. My fear of the highly suggestible world reflected sensible caution on my part, which most definitely needed to be addressed. While realizing I was not in the physical world, I also knew this was a real place. My experience in this foreign environment would affect me on all levels of my self. Acknowledging that concept and taking it seriously has given me the advantage of calm control during the visitation episodes. I continue to visit new environments and slowly work my way into understanding how to function within them. Not only does the experience help me understand other realities, it helps me understand the physical world as well.


Part One earth changes


Invitation to the Self I was entering a new level of education as the visitations took on new form. There was no more genetic experimentation or creation of hybrids. What took their place was a sincere, symbiotic relationship of open communication. Instead of being fed information in lecture format, I began my own experiential learning; I was able to ask questions and try things out on my own with limited but ever present guidance. My opinions were also of value, as I occasionally translated between human participants and star people. It seemed I was in the perfect position to understand and empathically pick up feelings from both sides. One of the lessons repetitively pounded into my head concerns the state of the Earth and the coming Earth Changes. I do not know if this information is to be taken symbolically, literally, or somewhere in between. The star people have gone to great lengths, relentlessly filling my mind with images of impending catastrophic events. When I say Earth Changes, I am referring to an increasing awareness and rising of vibrational frequencies that will bring about a change in consciousness on the planet. This may or may not include a pole shift. The shifting of the poles happens when the Earth shifts on its axis, causing the north and south poles to become positioned in new locations. This has been discussed in a number of writings. I am not an expert on the subject, but the star people have told me that if and when a pole shift occurs, there will be great physical upheavals on the Earth. I have also been taught that the best protection against these tragedies is to be as pure of mind and spirit as possible. These messages were conveyed to me through dreams, visions, and talks normally consisting of approaching storms, rising water, warnings of war, and images of the sun and moon. The state of the environment

It was brilliant. there was one occasion that I recall being on a craft with the star people. When I was able to turn back. I wanna show you something. white-skinned star person turned to me and said. Suddenly. I did. I recall standing breathlessly with my eyes fixated on a violent sky. but it was so intense. as the clouds began to twist and swirl. I automatically looked up. There seemed to be an evolution of these images. which I could almost call a closet. of the sun and the moon. a group of us casually hanging out together in one of the welllit rooms. a light burst forth from behind the clouds. looking quite menacing. but warnings of war and catastrophic-type storms were far greater in number. I tried to focus on the light. and I thought it must be the sun shining through the blackness. motioning for me to follow. it hurt my eyes to see it.” He walked toward the doorway and left the room. but there was no door on it. I was afraid that a tornado would develop. A rather tall.” A bright blue 151 . as he stood to my right side and held his hand above my head. “Watch this. soon making their way across the land toward me. Dark storm clouds loomed threateningly over the horizon. and he was a friend of mine. There were numerous visions like this. I was momentarily forced to look away. This was a comfortable situation where I could come and go as I pleased. He then said. I patiently and trustingly walked into it with him and faced the blank wall. at least 7-foot. This star person led me to a small indention at the end of the hallway. In fact. In one of the early visions. I saw that the light was emanating from a brilliant corona – it was an eclipse of the sun.Earth Changes had always been an issue that was brought up by the star people. “Hey. then proceeded down a brightly lit hallway. a connection between all of them that was built upon over the years.

sick feeling came over me – 152 . suddenly. What I saw then was the blue light fade out as a cloudy sky scene took its place. a small sliver of light shone through and then a darker object that I could not decipher. the immense body of water before me was swiftly sucked away by some tremendous force. I was standing on the beach looking out at the ocean. Still. an ill. I freely let the experience happen. Try to learn as much as you can about the world and its variety of people and cultures and become more understanding and loving to those around you. not believing my eyes. according to my sources. emanating from either his hand or something he held in his hand. Without warning. it’s a great idea to be open to other people’s ideas and to be tolerant of one another. I felt a calming peacefulness yet. many will not make it. at times separating from each other. I just look at it this way: no matter what happens on our planet. They won’t be ready to evolve. I do not know how easy that type of transition is to make but. and I realized then it was another eclipse. I kept watching and soon the clouds became thinner. probably containing a message of some sort. The first experience I have recorded about physical Earth Changes happened in 1988. a burst of light shone forth from behind a crescent. As the clouds rolled by. The night was still and the sky was clear. I jumped and fell over backwards with fright. After the initial shock. I believe that enlightening our minds and being open to experience will allow us to enter the new state of consciousness the planet needs to attain. I saw sandbars and puddles where a massive ocean rested only moments earlier.Invitation to the Self light. it was not clear to me what was happening when. filled my sight and I knew he wanted to show me an image. at the same time.

and this is my opinion on the matter: No matter what happens. Do you think you are separate from someone who 153 . I have had plenty of time to contemplate the idea of our planet erupting in chaos. All the people on this Earth. I kept recording the information with the hope that one day I would understand. and I assumed they were UFOs. humankind would be able to grow and thrive. If only we would stop and listen. So. I saw bright lights dancing above me in the sky. share the same fate. How can we enjoy it here if we devastate the place? If we would stop poisoning the Earth with pollution. all of which concerned the destruction of our planet and the demise of just about every creature inhabiting it. Just be quiet and listen – is that so much to ask? Stop what you are doing and soak in a little bit of that energy. I did not realize it at the time. Stop and think about the natural beauty we are destroying. This lesson was one of many. we could hear this beauty calling to us. There is love and beauty all around us. There wasn’t any way for me to prevent the elemental forces of Earth from doing whatever they wanted.Earth Changes that this life was about to end. The only way I had to deal with that concept was to keep it in the back of my mind and just try to live my life as a good person. If we would be more tolerant of one another and more willing to work together. People with money and people with no money share the same fate. so I was fairly limited in what I could do about that. We need to take care of this planet and we need to take care of each other. but what I was seeing was probably the makings of a tidal wave. right away I was exposed to the idea that “life as we know it” on Earth would not last forever. it would be able to grow and thrive. we have a responsibility to this planet. no matter what culture or lifestyle. This notion was not really one that I could comprehend.

we are One. Almost always. Many times I woke abruptly. Just like dominoes. It will not flourish if we fail to care for it. the Earth will do it for us. Together. 154 . emotional. we are God. We each feel we are too small to stop the problem. one by one. my first thought was to grab the dream journal or notebook or scrap of paper. And never forget…if one domino falls. I have a feeling that the Earth needs to cleanse itself before it goes on…and if we don’t clean up our act. These were in no way ordinary dreams. whatever was closest. and you are a little piece of them. Just remember that we are all connected – when one piece of a Soul begins to do something. I am of the opinion that if we all work together and pull ourselves and the planet through to the next level of awareness. too minute to make any difference. The people you meet are little pieces of yourself. and it will certainly not survive if we do not stop killing it. the others will soon follow. and write as much as I could before the tears stained the page so badly that it could never be read. not being able to move my muscles. We need to support one another. which is very much alive. or jolting upward into a sitting position with a feeling of shock or sudden realization. you have a Spirit that is connected to all Spirits. the other pieces follow.there will be no sadness like the death of the Earth. The visions that I experienced were very strong. What happens if we end up killing the planet? I can tell you one thing .Invitation to the Self is completely different than you . there will be no need for death and possibly mass extinction. We are not separate from each other. and thought provoking. and we need to step back and quietly take a look at the way we are treating this Earth. You are the same inside.someone who has a different belief system? You are not.

revealing the immense storm clouds sailing swiftly over the raging sea. sleeping peacefully. I walked the streets in my town and saw many changes. Even after many years of dealing with it. Dark clouds rolled in. I find truth in all. I am still moved by bursts of inspiration and insight stemming from dreams. as well as the atmosphere of the whole place. It did this again. a second day. I recorded important events in my book. My children lay near me.m. and trips to other realities that I know are as real as the material one I live in from day to day. as I prepared to seal the temple. Time was growing short. Then I knew it was time to prepare. I watched the sun set at 11:00 a. and I tried to avoid them.Earth Changes Living through extraordinary experiences is not easy for anyone. People no longer cared about each other. When the third day came. They did cruel things to hurt one another. I went to the center of town – to the temple. Many objects had a red aura around them. and the sun quickly began to sink below the horizon. until the children woke up. The people were different. Many were acting strangely. Turning back to the 155 . visions. and I ran to the door and called for the people of the town to come. I did nothing but record information for many days. as I waited for the signs. The windows of the temple looked out over the ocean.. One of the visions that really made a strong impact on me was recorded like this in my dream notebook: “…And the day came when I began to sense that the end was near. ones that I thought might later be useful to other people. with the moon following close behind. There came a day when the sun went down soon after it had risen in the morning. as if something had changed their minds about how they should live. so I was cautious.

both in the physical world and in the alternate reality. Two spaceships appeared outside the windows. but they did not come. the moon turning blood red. sparkling blue-green had turned brown. and three United States Destroyer ships gliding through the violent water. polluted and forgotten. just as I needed to be cared for.” I have always viewed this vision as very symbolic. One night. Overcome with dismay. I looked down the beach and saw an elderly couple sitting together on the white sand. seeking some kind of explanation. I pleadingly yelled out to the people. It had been a special place for me to visit.” They quietly replied that people had ruined the beauty with their garbage and didn’t care about it anymore. I plodded over toward them. Slowly I asked. The water that was once a gorgeous. I had no choice. They wanted me to understand the seriousness of the matter and to know that the Earth was a living organism that needed to be cared for. I saw the sun setting.Invitation to the Self windows. “What happened to this place? It used to be so beautiful…. people were busy “living” their lives. emotional reactions from me. I was placed in settings that. I had been to this place before. looking out over the water. 156 . the star people had warned of catastrophic events. but as my time with them progressed. From the beginning. Now it was dead. littered with gruesome clumps of oozing garbage and the shoreline was cluttered with a large amount of debris. but at the same time I have seen parts of it coming to life around me. I dreamt I was standing on a beach that had once been beautiful. were meant to draw intense. waiting for me to board. They did not have the time to stop and clean up their mess. I believe. I reluctantly and with great sadness sealed the temple. the information became more direct and focused. full of life and energy.

then a huge cloud coming up from the ground with lightening shooting out of it. I looked up and saw spaceships fighting with each other and with people on the ground – the government. I was here only a few years ago…how can this be?” They just looked out over the murky water. There were flowers 157 . A faint. staring out over a far expanse of those dangerous objects. “I don’t understand. and I knew he did too. The government was doing experimental testing with bombs. I was watching government personnel loading explosives into the tips (noses) of what looked like airplanes. It quickly became a “war of the worlds. I was standing outside with a star person. I stood on a small walkway. I then watched the planes colliding and exploding in midair. and felt an intimidating eeriness creep over me. The star person explained that there were many different groups involved in this fight. Suddenly. I felt sad. I then found myself in a huge government warehouse where explosives were stored in large cones. In the distance. I was standing in a beautiful green park that had existed in that location for a very long time. I had an alternate reality experience. He told me to watch the sky. bluish glow emanated from beneath the liquid covering the cones. I could not understand the calmness of their response. It was dark inside. fading from view as I woke. but there were so many that wanted to go through with the violence. I stared at them in disbelief and began to cry. I got the feeling he and others were trying to stop the fighting. I saw an orange flash of light.Earth Changes In other words. more than what I knew. they had better things to do. and very quiet. The following night.” with everyone attacking each other. In another episode.

the bugs and the grass and the trees. and they couldn’t understand how having a strong. and open spaces for picnics and for people to run and play. I looked to the young people and begged them not to let others come to this place. healthy foundation of life supporting their ideas would promote everyone’s growth. They laughed at me and said I was foolish – how could I expect them to make any money that way? They didn’t care about anything else. It was a peaceful area filled with a nice-feeling energy. All of it had been paved over with asphalt. 158 . some young people came to take over the maintenance of the park. and it made me feel such emptiness inside. What happened instead was. and we drove over to where the park should have been. I then saw a vision of the future: cars and trucks and buses came to the attraction and they all parked on the paved area. I looked out the window and was horrified.Invitation to the Self and trees. when the bus pulled up. They decided to pave it over and build a tourist attraction. it was too late to stop it. I was expecting to exit the bus and step out onto the lush green grass and enjoy the natural beauty. Well. It was like a sewer. One day. In my grief. but it was empty. Of course. I saw that underneath the pavement was a large. I hung my head and wept. remembering all the life that used to be there – animals and birds. gaping hole. By the time I knew what was going on. I thought about how they were wasting their energy on this useless project while destroying the Earth. I felt crushed inside. After I had the vision of the future. there was nothing to support them…they crashed through the asphalt and most died in the fall. I told them they were killing it and that it should be allowed to return to its natural state. I was riding on a bus with these young people.

I passed a wide gap in the earth below me. I wondered where I could possibly be. Then it hit. 159 . The next thing I knew. The few survivors straggled to their feet.Earth Changes The visions progressed to an even higher state of urgency. large group of people. as it seemed I was sitting on solid earth myself. face first. a darkness enveloping me. some of us started to feel our strength pick up and made a greater effort to reach our goal. seeing the moon and a planet very close to it. Slowly. I was propelled to the other side of the gap. but survived. An unanticipated shockwave of energy. I was sitting amid ruins. In one experience. Glancing around me. saw the fleeting vision of a military ship. staring intensely and squinting my eyes to examine the planet further. they would not have been able to pass over on foot. I was intrigued. however. There was a cold eeriness. I was trudging across a desert with a large. As I went speeding through the air. all exhausted from walking so far. dragging our feet as we slowly progressed through a barren wasteland. hurtling forward through the air. I saw the rubble and debris of what used to be a dwelling. smashing and rolling onto the ground. If the others had enough strength to reach it. a good 20 feet up. at that time. As we got close enough to actually see the other side. a blast so huge that most were laid out flat on the ground. I turned my eyes to the night sky. it appeared to me that the planet I was looking at in the distance was the planet Earth. In a moment of sheer disbelief and a widening of my eyes. Some. I had somehow gotten a little further ahead than most of the others. The star people were pushing me to the limit. We were trying to reach the other side. forcing me to imagine the end of life as we know it. I was lifted into the air by the tremendous smack to my body and. were lifted off their feet and went flying.

it would be fine if he told me a few things. That was all the information I got. He agreed that. They had tried to shoot it with lasers to steer it off course. Three nights later. I felt that I was not adequate to fill the space. yes. a powerful psychic attacked me. and I felt sad that there were no more teachers. but this action had been unsuccessful. After intense deliberation. I had managed to convince the psychic that it wouldn’t do any good to attack me in an attempt to retrieve information. he finally caught up to me and I had to face him. there were people of all ages sitting around me…so many faces of different colors and nationalities. so that justified his decision. I felt a twinge of panic in my stomach as I glanced at the papers sitting on my lap – the last of the notes that were left by earlier teachers. They were waiting for me to teach them. In fact. The people were depending on me. The government knew about it but did not disclose the information for one reason or another. I found myself in the position of having to decide which were the most important subjects to teach. and I began a conversation about his job and how much energy he was wasting pursuing me all night. I could see that he was tired as well. it would really be nice if he could give me some of his information. but I decided to do my very best. I attempted to smile and be friendly. I didn’t want to fight. After a very long and drawn out chase. he took on the opinion that he was being “overworked and underpaid” anyway. He went on to say that some type of large object hurtling through space was on its way to Earth. He agreed and decided to sit down. but there 160 . possibly to avoid panicking the masses. Before it was over. I had not heard those words before. so I just kept running away from him.Invitation to the Self When I looked back down to the ruins.

In the meantime. the star people continued showing me images of what seemed to be an eclipse. and a serious demeanor. but my eyes were opening and closing like I was in an altered. regular event that had happened before and was expected to happen again. In the scene of confusion. two beings emerged from the shadows and came at me. I was lying down on a table or some flat surface while the two of them were standing nearby talking. as a rather large figure stepped out from behind me and scared the other two off. and he made me feel quite safe. trance-like state. People were running past me.Earth Changes did seem to be some slight connection with the sun and moon images shown to me by the star people. the star people gave me a vision to see. In the distance. unnatural blackness. This being was protecting me as if he were a bodyguard. These visions became more detailed as time went on. hysterical. I know that gorgeous blue161 . He was around 8-foot tall. It was nice to know someone was looking out for me. with a very large build. but that did not ease my mind about Earth Changes. During one encounter with the star people. creamy-white skin. As I was slipping in and out of conscious awareness. but an unusual. I heard the star people telling me not to worry. not knowing what to do. it seemed that one of them was doing some kind of work to my head. He stood behind me in a defensive stance with his arms crossed in front of his broad chest. I distinctly heard one of them say. almost as if I had been given an anesthetic. smooth. I was outside and it was very dark…not a normal darkness. as it always did. as if this would be a normal. In fact.” They were speaking casually. I was listening to a conversation they were having about an event of massive proportions. “It always happens on an equinox.

the dart thrower might actually hit that number. we could see from the position the dart thrower was standing.” Let me try to explain this with an analogy: If we all stood still and held our breath.Invitation to the Self green water can easily be polluted with brown goo and trash. However. and about the sides. The immediate impact in the center sends out ripples that become less intense. Regardless of the visions. waiting for them to happen. I believe there is a reason for this. I believe this information should be discovered individually. and one of us threw a dart at a dartboard. If we all stood still and held our breath. I do not like to prophesize about the future simply because of this: prophecies do not always come true. and the reason is called “free will. if we start moving about and doing our own things. Prophecies might all come true if we all stand still and hold our breath. But what if the dart thrower moves an inch either way or if one of us coughs as the dart leaves the thrower’s fingertips – the dart might not hit the same spot we thought it would. where it might land and what number might be hit. in one’s own good time. The dart could end up anywhere…maybe not even on the board. Think about what happens when you drop a pebble into a pond. Perhaps some people might like me to tell them when the pole shift will happen and what signs they should watch for. in back. I cannot clearly give an explanation of what it all means. changing the lives of the people around us. Free will can change everything. in fact. and the trajectory of the thrown dart to the board. a funny little thing called free will comes into effect. it works like a ripple effect. but 162 . because people have a tendency to spoil natural beauty. the strength behind the throw. Imagine if everyone started moving around the dart thrower in front.

not even fair. The second wave affects your neighbors and the third wave affects the town you live in. So many events can change or transpire given to free will. The actions you take affect you and all the people around you. I believe. The ripples keep flowing to other parts of the world. This information may or may not hold truth for you. That is for you alone to discover. You are the center. in one way or another. I only present to you what I have experienced personally. that for me to take my experiences and predict Earth Changes for all people seems ridiculous and. The first wave is your family and close friends. You can choose to change your mind about anything at anytime. 163 .Earth Changes larger until they reach the edge of the pond.

Invitation to the Self 164 .

Graduation Part Two psychic attack 165 .

I had nightly visitors who wanted to know what I knew about the star people. having traveled there myself. I turned and looked to see a figure walking on the opposite side of the street. It was a difficult task for another psychic to scare me. 166 . I created a knife in my hand. I have always been one to give people a chance. I know that all people have some good in them. so only hints of light shone forth from here and there. I nonchalantly strolled along a quiet. just in case. when confronted by the government psychics. All the shops had long since been closed. so it is only fair that I should give them the benefit of the doubt. Fortunately for me. I had training in this field. The government psychics were coming in full force. I stayed on alert. I never took the initiative to attack anyone.Invitation to the Self Another lesson that intensified as it evolved was how to defend myself against psychic attack. It was a man who seemed to be trying to keep my same pace. like I was in this experience: I was already in the alternate reality. empty downtown street late at night. Quite often. Some of the inquisitors were straight to the point and immediately began to ask direct questions. I then noticed a dark shape in the far right side of my peripheral vision. enjoying the evening air. In a defensive mode. but I was learning how to defend myself in new and inventive ways. let alone retrieve any information he or she might be looking for. I meandered down the sidewalk. Others were sneaky and attempted to trap me in some way so that I was forced to tell them what I knew. However. even if I knew that particular individual was not a friend. The most popular (and most bothersome) method was to attempt to scare me so badly that I would become paralyzed with fear and do whatever I was told.

I know it sounds revolting. he was right behind me. he quickly averted his eyes and started singing and talking to himself – a very good move on his part. No matter where I went. he had his own defense for this. I was exhausted and did not feel that I 167 . He grabbed for me and I slashed at him with the knife. until I wasn’t going to put up with it any longer. I started to get tired and knew I couldn’t run much longer. He tried to jump onto me and pin me down. I ran again. I quickly slipped into a backyard and picked up the pace even more. I kept cutting and slicing. I started running. Instead. In fact. it became quite obvious to him that he had been spotted. doing a very nice job of completely ignoring me. along with the knowledge of not being physical. I started to walk faster. and he was still talking. also running now. but I was up quickly. focus is the most important rule. and so did he. I probably would have been able to lose him easier. if I had handled that situation a little less dramatically. The knife was in my hand as I jumped down onto his chest and began to cut his throat. but it would not last much longer. In the alternate reality. and he was just looking the other way. this time in another direction. Even before I could turn to face him.Psychic Attack Now. I knew I was in trouble. When I had his head almost entirely severed from his body. and swiftly pushed him down to the ground. so I decided to stand and fight. I stepped up beside him. I had him down for the moment. positioning my leg behind his. I came to a tall fence and turned to look behind me. He was right there. he grabbed a handful of my hair and yanked hard to pull me over backwards. We struggled for some time. one hit after another. The man followed. Instead of focusing his energy on what I was doing to him. but I had to do something! Besides. to see how close he was.

I did some research of my own. I didn’t know when. we talked about the attack – he did not recall the exact details. including defense against psychic attack. I yelled out for help. so I got up and left the scene. there was always someone to aid me when I really needed help.and that was pretty hilarious. I had a strong feeling that he was going to come back for me.Invitation to the Self could go on. especially after the psychics discovered that he knew what was going on. but kept very quiet so I did not attract his attention. best friends. but I made a great effort in focusing on it with strong intent. He knew about the visitations in great detail. and the troubles I had been having with the government psychics. My husband instantly appeared and took control of the situation. and supported each other in everything. I was able to discover his name and what he was afraid of: snakes. Most fortunate was the fact that Bryan had been studying psychic self-defense himself. but I suspected it could be as early as the following night. that fear is the great killer. I found him later that same night. I was sure he could handle it. I would spend the entire next day concentrating on becoming a snake . Therefore. This was not an easy task. Luckily. I tried to think about what it must feel like to be a snake. It’s a 168 . People can be controlled by their fears. This particular psychic was determined and quite powerful. and that was a tactic commonly used by the psychics to gather information. In fact. and even the government psychics themselves. I had learned from the star people. of course. it wasn’t just me but also Bryan who was targeted. Using the travelling skills I had learned. We were partners. but he did remember helping me with a struggle. but I tried to imagine it anyway. When he woke. I set a plan into motion.

which was completely bare. I kept telling myself repeatedly to watch for him and turn into a snake when he approached. Then I let loose…or should I say the snakes let loose. I focused and told myself to wait. I held back until he was approximately six inches away from my face. using just enough outwardly focused energy to determine his position and how close he was getting. As I went to sleep. He had what you might call a “shit-eating” grin on his face. What I was actually doing was keeping my focus inward. I concentrated completely on my plan to become a snake when this man showed up again. and it was tiring. I stood in one position. which quickly brought me into an altered state of consciousness. The look on my face was probably blank. and the government psychic entered the room. I watched as hundreds of tiny snakes shot out of my snake-like self into the bewildered government psychic. MUCH to my surprise. square room. I found myself standing in a small. That night. unmoving.Psychic Attack good thing I didn’t have to go out anywhere that day…snake woman on the loose. This took a great deal of energy on my part. with no sign of him. and it may have appeared as though I were paralyzed with fear. it happened. Filled with eager anticipation. With each deliberate step he took. I could clearly perceive the life-like intensity of this place and braced myself as the door opened. I went through a number of regular dreams. apparently very pleased with himself for finding me so easily. 169 . maybe with wide eyes. I entered the fourth dream. looming over the psychic's head. I shape-shifted into a 10-foot snake poised on its tail end in a striking position.

Learning how to defend myself turned out to be very useful. The government psychics kept coming. even more so than the star people. At that point. You might be wondering HOW the government people were doing this. It is not difficult to travel out-of-body and visit another person. I still do not know the definitive answer to that question. I was flying around when something caught my attention and then ended up trapping me – they drew me to them. At times. and they were also intent on keeping track of my whereabouts. The government psychics use this technique as well as remote viewing. government people never took me out of my bed like the star people did. I noticed a subtle difference between the visitations of the star people and those of the government. I was always in the alternate reality already when they made contact with me. I never saw him again. with genetics. eyes bulging and mouth hanging open as the snakes went into his body. the psychics were working their way into my life. psychic development. and “time travel” (for lack of a better phrase). From what I am able to recall. unfortunately. an experience with 170 . I have a feeling they differed slightly in the frequency they took place in. In many of the attacks. Perhaps they needed to keep track of my vibrational frequency so they would know when I had entered the alternate reality. I believe the government conducts its own experimentation. It could be that although it was also a conscious state of awareness. clearly stunned and shocked.Invitation to the Self Talk about the element of surprise…. He stood motionless. Now more than ever. They were definitely interested in any information they could attain about the star people. he was the one unable to move. it was something I definitely needed to know. but I do have an idea.

but then I figured they must have been having some type of costume party. it happened one night. not in the physical world. seen them existing in the same space. I had. “okay. and he would adjust it so the experiment would work. in between my teeth. something I could not quite put my finger on. quite unexpectedly for everyone involved. which I thought was strange. Boy. It seems to me that the government psychics do not have the same level of access to an abductee/contactee as the star people do. All the people were dressed in costumes. do I know how to get myself into trouble or what? He just needed me to hold some little metal thing in my mouth. Whatever the case. I believe those experiences also took place in the alternate reality.Psychic Attack the government people was actually more like the physical world. they work on two different levels of the alternate reality. As I was dancing and trying to fit in with these weird people. Perhaps the secret government was trying to reach that same level the one the star people operate from. He seemed pretty harmless. Ever wonder what would happen if the government psychics showed up the same night the star people did? Well. I woke in the alternate reality to find myself dancing at a nightclub. We 171 . It has been easier to recall details and events taking place in those experiences with the government people than it has been to remember the star people visitations. I believe there were times when it was accomplished. at times. There was also an odd feel to the place. I might add.” and went with him. a man approached and asked if I would help him with an experiment he was working on. closer to it in the vibration of energy. or maybe the star people came down a step or two for one reason or another. so I said.

Invitation to the Self walked over to an object shaped somewhat like a small telescope standing on a tripod. I didn't care about his experiment any longer. wanting to help out." Well. about 8-foot tall. He gave me the little metal piece to hold in between the upper and lower teeth on the right side of my mouth. my tongue darting away from the awful metallic taste. Out of the corner of my eye. It became quite clear that it was a star person. in the shadows. I asked the man to stop. found I was unable to move. I clamped down on it. but. I wasn’t too happy about it. Suddenly.” I complied. I was not worried. over to the left. a sound from behind the curtain distracted the man working on my tooth. This was over on the far side of the room. The figure leapt from the shadows and grabbed him. I began to feel an uncomfortable sensation of electricity coming from the metal. and he turned and went closer to look. I saw a rather tall figure appear near the curtain. I was getting aggravated. and I quickly pulled the metal piece from my tooth. away from everyone else. I just wanted to get away but at that point. he attempted to insert the metal piece into one of my lower molars on the right-hand side. We were standing close (about three or four feet) to a wall covered by a long curtain that reached the floor. I just dealt with it. as I knew its focus was not on me. As I held my mouth open. and then came over to me and asked me to open my mouth so he could put the metal piece “in place. He was adjusting some controls on the telescope-like object. It was vibrating and sending little shocks into my tooth. I could not see it well but had the feeling it was waiting for the right moment to jump out. because it was bothering me. I looked at it 172 . He dragged the man from view. but he kept insisting it would not take much longer and that I was "doing just fine.

headed for the exit. but instead stuffed it into my pocket and ran across the room. As I was lying there. and my first instinct to save my hide was to smile and wave. I went about my business of getting some 173 . trying to find an escape. I kept running and running until I woke up. with my hand resting on top of my husband’s head. The star person had left as quickly as he had come in. I found no way out. but there was no response. approximately 4-foot tall. my heartbeat accelerated. which showed me the bedroom doorway. I stopped to look up. which was sending out flashes of light every few seconds. nonetheless. Much to my surprise. The door opened and in strolled a government agent. so I got up and went to the kitchen for a drink. which I did. with light creamy-tan colored skin and large black slanted eyes peeking around the bedroom doorway. My pulse quickened as my eyes widened and became glued to the mirror. slowly waking from my sleep. my glance fell upon the mirror on my wall. I crashed through the barn doors and ran into an open yard. Then I saw him – a small being. One night I was lying in my bed. I turned and ran through other yards and behind houses. It was THE eyeball…I was so shocked to see it. Suddenly. While I was running. Bryan jumped and sat up in the bed.Psychic Attack first. not able to get any real sleep. but my husband had seen him. while he was sleeping. there was an extremely large eyeball hovering in the sky. I caught sight of a flashing light reflecting off the nearby houses of this rural neighborhood. as I distinctly felt a presence in the house. I wanted to yell to Bryan. It was at that point I noticed that the “night club” actually looked like a barn. thinking to throw it onto the floor. but I could not move…not even my lips. who was lying next to me asleep. watching intently.

he was able to bring us there by way of thought. but it did not appear to be me. He was nice to me and seemed harmless. but was now sitting with a woman at one of the dining tables. briefly scanning whatever was lying about. I walked up beside him and said “Hello” and began asking him questions about why he was in my house. and they both smiled. I assume that because I was giving him my full attention. As we spoke. Looking back at it now. I was awake for a short time and then went back to the alternate reality and the same government building. how could I be so calm about a government agent walking into the house? I should have at least screamed in fright! I don’t have much of a choice but to assume I was already in the alternate reality and had not realized it. wondering what he was doing in my house. apparently waiting for others to arrive. We were standing in what looked like a long dining hall filled with decorated tables and chairs.Invitation to the Self juice as he wandered in aimlessly. the room gradually changed into another room. which actually isn’t too hard to believe. He searched around the dining room and then the living room. I try to rationalize this bizarre occurrence – if I was awake. apparently looking for something. They looked up when I appeared. Then they went back to 174 . one inside a government building. but I woke in my bed before anything happened. I was curiously watching him. I got the impression he was actually there for me but didn’t want to alert me to that fact. We stood around for a while. The man was still there. I must have slipped into that other state of consciousness without noticing. Streamers were hanging from the ceiling like there was going to be a party.

What has occurred to me since then is that they couldn’t really do much if they could not keep my attention. I walked into this room and saw. They were dressed in what looked like white lab coats. I jumped up onto a table. so…naturally. a star person sitting on a bench! I stood still to wait for any movement or reaction on the star person’s part. and I began to feel the pangs of boredom. but it is likely they were surprised to see me swinging from the ceiling. He led me over to a table where two other people were standing. These were government personnel who worked with “psychic development. The man rose from his seat and asked if I would accompany him. black eyes. Suddenly.Psychic Attack their conversation. seemingly confused with my actions. Well. I laughed to myself as I flew about the room like some wild woman. entering a large. I stood back and paused momentarily in irritation as I realized that what I was looking at was not what I had assumed it to be. but there was none. jumping from table to table. We stood and looked at each other for a few moments. much to my surprise. no one taking the initiative. and I was allowed to roam about freely if I chose. I jumped down and said “sure. Perhaps they didn’t know how to fly. The man and woman took notice and stared at me in wonder.” No one made any sudden movements. so I went to investigate. I was distracted by a noise coming from one of the side rooms. I got closer and looked into the large.” We walked into another section of the building. 175 . open room with a low ceiling that had a few doors going to other smaller rooms. what else was there to do? I leapt to the next table and the next and started grabbing streamers and swinging around the room on those.

“You’re not a star person. you’re a fake!” I strode decisively into the next small room and saw yet another fake star person. In fact.” enabling them to contact me at any time.Invitation to the Self I angrily yelled out. they were very pleasant with me. I quickly strode over to him. I propped myself up on the table in disgust.” I could not believe my ears. one of them being that they needed help in “gaining my confidence. I was just very revolted with the whole affair and losing what patience I had. I was disgusted and stormed out of the room. as they pleaded with me to go along with them. so I lay down on that table and let them inject 176 . There seemed to be a sense of urgency. They knew all about my visitations from the star people and the government psychics that tried to gather information from me. They were engaged in a discussion about me. they even told me that they had attempted to gather information from me a number of times with no luck. “What the hell is that!? That’s a suit!” Seeing a portly man in a security uniform. “What is that fake star person doing in there!?” He replied that those fake aliens were utilized to project images that were used for a number of reasons. Consumed by indignation. They went on to explain that what they needed to do now was to “get a lock” on my “frequency patterns. I walked back over to the lab coat people and their examination table. I pushed it over and watched it topple over onto the floor…nothing more than a suit. and I could see no harm in what they were asking. projecting false images of aliens so I’ll be cooperative with them – and he actually told me that! Perhaps his conscious mind was not aware of what he was saying in this place. However. He was so indifferent about the whole thing…no big deal. At that point. I was not afraid of these people.

I went exploring down a hallway. They said they’d almost gotten the lock on my frequency. so many that I didn’t bother to count. that relaxing drug they gave me wasn’t working too well. I turned to walk away and received sudden empathic feelings of sadness and regret. I tried to sit still for as long as I could and let them get the “lock” they needed. However. Apparently. glad to see me returning. of all things. I just nodded my head and slowly made my way back to the large. I sat up and pulled the wires off my body. but I just couldn’t help it. I somehow understood that this had been their “last chance. I was still intent on searching the place. Unfortunately for them.” They proceeded to hook me up with pads and wires. looking into rooms along the way. I wasn’t interested in helping out anymore. The lab coat people were very upset that they did not get the lock on my frequency and. One room had a purple-colored forest in it. He said the psychics could use the things in these rooms to “disorient” people they wanted to gather information from.” It seems the secret government wanted to tag me and lock onto my vibrational frequency in order to track my progress through the upper 177 . This was some type of training facility for government psychics. I did see a person standing in the hallway and I asked him what all this stuff was for. but they needed me to get on the table for a little longer. I stopped and turned to look back at them. and I was getting bored again. open room with the examination table. at that moment. I saw people in the rooms along the way but did not stop. I was too curious about the other rooms.Psychic Attack me with something that would help me “relax. I jumped off the table and walked toward another one of the doorways leading to more rooms beyond this large one. The lab coat people were standing there.

It was an underground building. I looked back down and saw that this was a marshy area with cattails surrounding the exit. I went to look around again. In the morning. completely hidden from view. over the water. They landed their helicopter nearby and wanted me to hop 178 . I leapt into the air and flew toward the exit.Invitation to the Self levels of the alternate reality that the star people work from. they would make the star people look bad by doing mean things in their star people suits. Another tactic they began to use more often was to disguise themselves as star people. where two of my spirit friends were waiting to help me. simply because they were not able to take a measurement of frequencies that high. but were unsuccessful. feeling very much like I was awake. They opened the doors as I flew up a ramp and into the sky. some “star people” were flying around in a helicopter…so right away. They desperately needed to access those levels. things were weird. I sat for some time and just thought. I felt scared and started to cry as I flew home. Why were those government people so nice to me? Was it just to get what they wanted? And why were they so sad when they failed to acquire that “lock on my frequency?” The government psychic encounters became more and more strange as time went on. however. On yet another occasion of running from attackers all night. when I saw them. I had not been expecting their assistance but. I ran into a nasty government psychic that began chasing me down a hallway. I assume this was in order to have me believe they were friendly. so I could trust them. Sometimes. but the people were not being so friendly anymore. I was consciously aware at that point. I went to them quickly.

awaiting the practice attackers’ approach. resting peacefully. My way to cope with the nightly insanity was to learn from it and devise a new technique for fighting off the attackers. less violent method of protection.Psychic Attack onboard and take a ride. My system of defense slowly began to evolve into a less fearful. yelled at them. it was not hard to lose them.” Their costumes fell off and they were clearly human underneath. I was in the mountains with a gathering of like-minded people. When they landed near me again. Dealing with so much stress at night was not easy. I somehow managed to put on a smiling face and go about my daily business without too much trouble. Two people came at me. These two were flying at me. at that point. I stood my ground defiantly and. And by the way. We were all practicing defensive moves against psychic attack. “Are we going for a ride into outer space or to a government lab!?” and their reply was. I got a pretty good idea of what was going on. I have no idea what a green lab is. One lovely alternate reality evening. but. and my first reaction was to use energy like the star people had shown me.” and they both floated softly down to the ground with their eyes closed. with hands on hips. Eventually. I was learning how to defend myself in less violent ways. It seemed to me that not only was this way calmer and more peaceful for both 179 . I pushed a good amount of blue light energy at them. I thought it was crazy – did they steal a chopper or what? I woke up three times during the course of the night and went back into this same odd experience. “to a green lab. having come up from the bottom of the hill. saying “peace…sleep. They chased me. I was standing on a large hill. I even met others in the alternate reality who were working on the same issue.

Invitation to the Self sides involved. but it also took less energy and effort than having a fistfight. if you think about it. 180 . The psychic attackers would soon learn that my methods were ever-changing and unpredictable. doesn’t even make sense in a reality where physical laws do not apply. Which.

Graduation Part Three the connection 181 .

going from thoughts and feelings of home. The series of photographs began in the infant stage and progressed all the way to present day. My alternate reality skills were coming into clear focus. Where were my mom and dad? Weren’t they supposed to be protecting me? I was just a baby! What shook me up so badly was the abrupt switch of perception. in a way. I did not want to know about. A number of times. The visitations had definitely changed. On one hand.Invitation to the Self I was beginning to feel more confident that the experiences I had at night were every bit as real as my daily. I felt a kind of connection with the star people. Although the star people were still around. I was sitting in a chair looking at a photo album. This was worse because it dealt with a small. love and caring to being stolen from my crib at night and whisked away to wherever the star people wanted to take me. Time that. I felt as though I were progressing somehow. My subconscious mind began to reveal memories of the past. protection. they basically stayed in the background and let me go with it. and most likely oblivious to the fact it was happening at all. like the feeling you might experience with old 182 . with the star people. defenseless child – me. wondering where my parents had been. and it hurt more than the feelings I had after dealing with attackers. I became quite upset looking at these photos. and there was the sneaking suspicion I had been through a lot more of this “training program” than I was consciously remembering. I felt violated. My parents had been helpless to stop it. family. waking life. in which I was spending a considerable amount of time with the star people…more time than I could have ever imagined. Inside the album were pictures of me…at different stages during my life. as I found myself free to explore on my own.

special rooms that are protected by thick metal walls. I was near a tent working with a few other kids my age. but that “this complex IS a safe. that the visitations had commenced before I could even speak my mind. Before we embarked on our journey.The Connection friends that have been in and out of your life but are always friends no matter what. I felt unsure of my life and who I was. I couldn’t understand how I could have been gone so long without my parents even noticing. I realized there could be a connection with something a star person had said to me as we were boarding a UFO. I asked how long we would be gone on the ship. She replied “Oh. in some type of training camp.” I knew I had been at this camp for about two weeks. It sounded like a nickname. and someone (exactly whom that someone was is not clear to me now) was teaching us how to survive in cold weather conditions. I worried about hidden memories and. in fact. it was agonizing. I was with a group of teenagers. I heard someone say the name of the place. From what I was beginning to see. He was explaining to me that most places have “safes”. logically thinking as an adult. But this was my initial response to the shock.” 183 . pushing aside the few feet of fallen snow to reveal the earth underneath. I had spent a good deal of my life with the star people. about a month or so. After looking back over my records. but I wondered how there was no “missing time" back home. On the other hand. it seemed that I had been taken advantage of. Snow was falling as we dug with shovels and hoes into the ground. but I can’t recall it now. The scene changed and we were inside an underground area surrounded by thick metal walls. The intensity picked up as I saw visions of the past: myself as an adolescent. This person looked like an Army soldier.

I figured it wasn’t either. I leapt from the couch and sprinted to the door. I watched intently as a figure slowly approached the house. I watched a small red light appear in the distance. they moved closer and closer to me. and they proceeded to do their up and down motion side by side. I curled up in the blankets and snoozed off to the alternate reality. up and down. I wasn’t sure if the light was an airplane or helicopter. It was moving in an odd fashion. all staring at the back door. up and down. Is it possible that time moves differently in the alternate reality? I believe so. I decided to go in. More and more often I had vivid dreams of parties and reunions social gatherings of humans and star people. At bedtime. On the edge of our seats. The rest of my family was already sitting there. and a faint red glow slowly spread across the lawn.Invitation to the Self but we were only gone for three or four hours earth time that night. I was standing on the back porch stargazing. Another identical craft joined it. not quite in fear. and I then realized I had left the door wide open. As I watched. One evening while still awake. Wham! I slammed the door right into the little guy’s head! 184 . At first. but after watching it abnormally move up and down. just doing its little movement. Not wanting anything dangerous to walk right in. Once there. I found myself standing on the back porch again. but something more like anxiety. I turned and sped into the house and jumped onto the living room couch. we waited. vertically in the sky. After observing the light for a good 30 minutes. It stayed at the same distance. The little red light had evolved into a red pyramid shape with a jellyfish-like tail.

A young 185 . “OH. two babies!” and quickly swung the door open. and we all decided to go. that is. who were able to maintain a conscious level of awareness. I seemed to instinctively know to do this. one just clambering to his feet. In appearance. This large room was a social gathering area with activities going on. I went over to bathe at one of the many shower areas I saw in a back section of the room. as I had seen people taking showers on the ships. and playing games. and I’d seen the star people washing some passengers off before bringing them aboard. The next thing I was aware of was standing in a large open room with a conglomeration of beings: humans. They wanted us to go with them. hybrids. although they did not specify where. however. which probably frightened them quite a bit. smiling and apparently not upset over my sudden reaction. People were mingling. It seemed that the people with more experience. They both stepped cautiously up to the door. they looked like 2-year-old human boys. It just seemed natural to me. both with light blonde hair. so I asked my husband and kids if they felt like having an adventure. wondering what I had done. and those who were in other states of consciousness were gently taken care of by others. could fend for themselves. I didn’t feel embarrassed as I walked over to the open shower and removed my clothing. as if we all lived there together and I had been there before. I knew. they were not fully human. and nobody was paying attention anyway…until I began showering. Everyone needed to be clean before spending time on a craft. apparently knocked back from the impact of a wooden door slamming in his face. talking to each other. There were two small hybrid children. It felt very comfortable. I exclaimed. and star people.The Connection I peered out through the glass.

“I like the way your body is made. This kind of event would happen from time to time and become more frequent as my experience advanced. just intently observing. Looking further. As I mentioned before. He said. examining what I could. It was lovely. I thanked him and finished my shower. speaking about military bases. star person. but he wasn’t googling or anything. listening intently to a lady who was reading a book to them. I had come to understand many of the 186 . The sight was awesome and I just stood there for a few moments. from his reaction to me. I walked out onto it and was amazed to see that we were floating above a white. and had tall windows draped with sheer white cloth. sparkling city. I clothed myself and walked into a smaller room. whether it was human. soaking in the excitement of it all. Why would I go from a beautiful. There was some connection that I had not puzzled together yet. I strolled through the center of the room. What a surprisingly beautiful place it turned out to be! Smiling. I then heard someone. This room almost seemed like a daycare center. ones that held evidence of extraterrestrial life and knowledge of the star people. somewhere in the back of my mind. happy experience to a briefing on military bases? I really don’t know. painted with bright colors. or hybrid. I was now in a position of being able to communicate to just about everyone I encountered.Invitation to the Self man walked up and curiously watched me. There was a group of children sitting on the floor. he apparently was not.” At first glance. I discovered a balcony extending outward from this room. The story was about Goddesses. The peacefulness was suddenly jolted by the sound of military jets flying by – quite an abrupt change. I had assumed this person was human but.

and some of the people in the room panicked and ran into corners in a feeble attempt to hide.. even during the transitional period of moving from one reality to another. I was standing in a room with about 20 other humans. We all saw beautifully colored lights twinkling above us.” for lack of a better term. When they touched it. I didn’t like the idea much. Sometimes the star people could be purely “scientific” in their methods.” but some of them ran for the door and tried to turn the knob. I shook my head and muttered to myself with disapproval. since I was usually the only one who could see them. but I did not feel it was meant to be harmful. Here is an example of what happened one time during a translation experience: Finding myself in the alternate reality. It seemed we had all arrived in this place together and were just becoming aware of our surroundings. the star people were on their way and wanted to keep all 20 of us there until they arrived. which really surprised me the first time I deciphered it. a small electrical shock came from the doorknob. which was nice for me to experience in a group. and the people yelled and jumped back. including their own feelings and the feelings of their “subjects.” 187 . in many instances.The Connection star peoples’ actions and mannerisms. Apparently. I knew the sound as the speech used by some of the star people. “it’s okay. put their work before anything else. They sometimes spoke in a language of screeching “beeps.. We simultaneously looked up to the ceiling and it disappeared so we could view the night sky. and by that I mean that scientific researchers. We also began to hear screeching noises. I compassionately said. I had heard this many times.. I also understood their speech. I tried to calm them down.

Even more humorous were the hair colors they had chosen – pink and purple. It was funny to me. It was a rather strange and abrupt visit. I discovered that if I concentrated on their sharp sounding voices I could understand them. unsure of what to do. As we stood there. of course. They had never been good at being fashionable. we realized these were from different lives we had lived. and even told them the star people were about to walk through the door. I was right. explained to the people that this had happened before. as if the ink were bleeding up through the surface of our skin. What I managed to uncover was this: their planet was in very bad shape. so their hair almost reached the floor. in a clear voice.Invitation to the Self I walked to the center of the room and. I told the other people what the star ladies had said. I was able to calm their nerves a bit. each wearing a makeshift disguise of robes and wigs. The doorknob turned and in through the doorway came two star ladies. Upon closer inspection. At that point. but I knew they were trying to talk to us. Images and designs began to show. and that we needed to try to remain calm and just stay where we were. kind of like tribal markings. It was quite unnerving. and I had no idea what the purpose was. Then I saw a brief vision of a planet exploding. another lady and I began to see “tattoos” appear on our hands and arms. and we kind of stood around for a few minutes in a bit of a stupor. I inspected them for a while before waking. so they had to evacuate. but there were many images sprawled across our bare arms. We had a few marks in common. they were only about 3-foot tall. some almost 188 . they left. with really long wigs. They were allowed to make one last trip back there to complete any unfinished business. but we had no choice except to watch and let it happen. They were screeching.

It looked like an experiment in psychology. I then grabbed the star person’s arm and said to him. I traveled to the alternate reality quite often without them. People were seated at stools around a bar having drinks. and they always looked like they enjoyed my company. and curiously asked. as I did theirs.” and the star person quietly backed off. I was quickly becoming the cultural interpreter. basic words would do. including me. round table. We had apparently just arrived in the alternate reality. like something I had seen before in an ancient history book. so I quickly lunged forward to intercept the blow and scolded the man. the star person reached out to stop him. There was also the time when the star people were observing a group of humans.The Connection identifiable. with so much energy needed to focus. The star people had given me the freedom to come and go as I pleased – or perhaps I had taken that privilege for myself. and a few inquiring individuals peered at us from their tables. You are not going to take that away from us. “No. One of them went to strike a star person on the head. when I saw a star person sitting at a small. I was standing in a café with my husband. Of course. nothing I had ever seen on this planet. in an enclosed setting. They seemed to be sitting back and watching me explore on my own. saying. Then when the same human turned to hit a fellow human in the head. with two star people inside the room with us (participant observation). “No hit!” I guess I figured in this state of mind. There were also those that I had no clue about. I was looking around. Every now and then I would run into them. checking things out. like the spongy Nerf type. “Can 189 . In one experience. He noticed that I was looking in his direction. That is a form of communication. A few humans were wielding soft baseball bats.

” and the star person. I was getting the impression that I was not the typical contactee the star people dealt with. “yes. not fully aware of what was going on around them. knowing they can see all the humans they want upon waking. The one trick I recall the most clearly is creating a ball of light energy in my hand. And. He seemed to be proud of me. even as I was waking! In that state just between sleeping and waking. and said to him. This is most likely true for many contactees. How long has the connection been there and 190 . Bryan also walked over and stood behind me to watch. The star person. there’s an alien in the room. he would ask. as there is evidence of ancient peoples sighting UFOs and extraterrestrial beings. Before each trick. my focus was on watching the star people. I am your brother. Many of the fellow humans I saw on the ships seemed to be in trance-like states. I would replicate the maneuver. for the most part. and I suspect it has been that way for a very long time. we are somehow related. I felt his presence all morning.” and walked over to sit at the table. I turned to Bryan. “I am not an alien. What I was beginning to understand was that the star people are not separate from humans. glad to see a friendly face. who was lying in the bed next to me.” and I knew in my heart this was true. In order for me to speak to them. showed me three “tricks” that he could do with his hands. There is a strong connection between us. “Can you do this?” and afterward. standing next to the bed. and kept speaking with me.Invitation to the Self you see me?” I said. “Look. it would take a good deal of concentration and energy to help them bring their attention into focus enough to listen. in a chair across from him. who are only able to see and observe the star people during visitation. quickly said to me.

They even refer to us. but as the dream progressed. I got the hang of it. I was having a bit of trouble at first. as if I had put on glasses. The front seat enlarged and the steering wheel turned into a lever. smooth. I had a vivid dream in which I was driving a car. star people and human. Many concepts were changing for me. This typical four-door sedan eventually turned into a spacecraft. I found myself standing on the ground facing two star people. They did not speak to me. One of the star people standing before me was quite tall and the other was fairly short. One evening. The more I thought about this.The Connection how deep does it go? From what they have told me. sat and talked with them. When the craft had become fully equipped for space. as I grew in different areas of my life. the more I felt that it was okay to spend time with them. as brothers and sisters. It was funny to see them standing there together. I stood in one position as the world around me went from blurry to clear. but smiled and handed me what looked like a small compact case. the dream state evolved into a more conscious level of awareness. I willingly accompanied them on their spaceships. with no seams. I decided that I wouldn’t be the person I am today without their companionship. I went from steering and controlling the vehicle from one spot to having to run back and forth across the room to make use of all the controls. The vehicle also went through the transformation from ground travel to air travel. fuzzy to crisp. with about a 3-foot height difference. At that point. we are a family. and listened patiently to their lectures. as did the car itself. that fit into 191 . The controls in the car changed every so often. Even when I was a young child. and they had woken me from my slumber.

My heart felt like it would explode with pure joy as I did flips and rolls through the air. and then with much exhilaration.” I kept my eyes open as I continued to drift upward through the ceiling of my room and out through the top of the roof. wondering what I should do with it.Invitation to the Self the palm of my hand. After I made it out. when flying. I was filled with a happiness that I cannot explain. “You can go through the ceiling. wanting to immerse myself in the shining light. shining on a distant storm cloud. turning it over and over. The scene had changed and I was in my own bedroom. I flew for the cloud. noticing the feel of it. leaving my body. Wanting to continue. as my state of consciousness shifted up another level. up around 10 feet or so. I was standing in the wet grass and actually felt a mosquito bite me. as I saw the sun peeping up over the horizon. It seems that. I stopped. creating a reddish glow. wondering what it was for. I stopped briefly to look down at the house and yard. floating in midair. shot upward toward the starry sky. I concentrated and thought to myself. I held it in my hand. Then a beautiful array of colors caught my eye. I suddenly knew that if used properly. I felt the thickness of the roof as I floated up through it. It worked! I was slowly lifted off the ground. I closed my fingers around the compact and thought about floating. It was 192 . They just kept smiling at me. and I saw the layers and materials it was composed of. a good burst of energy can take one a long way. It was my bedroom ceiling! I was now quite aware of what was happening. feeling so much happiness as I let my body fly swiftly through the air. and then realized that my head was bumping into something solid. I smiled back and then looked down at the compact. this small compact would enable me to float in the air. The star people were gone.

down to where my physical body was sleeping. until I woke in my physical body. was a living. there. It was a very exciting time for me. Bryan and I studied the subject together. I was ecstatic. as far as I could see and. It didn’t take long for me to start 193 . to put it mildly. I was learning and discovering new concepts so quickly. With great anticipation. my silver cord. extending from my upper back. but this was made of a number of thick cords coming out of my back. was more important to me than anything else.The Connection then that a conscious remembering hit me – I had always wanted to find my silver cord. was floating behind me. which wasn’t actually silver but a pinkish flesh tone. The cord became thinner and thinner the farther away from me it went. I turned to look behind me and. but I didn’t care about that anymore anyway. I reached behind me and grabbed hold of it. this was a surprise. a part of myself. I also noticed a kind of stickiness to it. I expended my remaining energy on examining it as long as possible.” In absolute awe. scribbled it down quickly in my dream journal. I had lost the little compact. flesh-like “cord. which was the only thing that made it different from any other part of my body. Well. I felt the warmth radiating from it and felt the thickness and heaviness that continued down toward the Earth. It was enormous. What I had discovered. I had expected to see a thin string. I assume. of course. similar to the rest of my skin. I took those new ideas and experimented with them. I pulled the cord around to my front to get a good look at it. I lay there and thought happily about the cord and. my heart beating fast with excitement. joining together as they went outward. After the star people taught me about energy manipulation. becoming one solid mass of living flesh.

I sat there and watched them for quite some time as they stood directly on the other side of the barrier. a sort of barrier that I hoped would work in the alternate reality. As it turned out. I was correct about a visitation. imagining the energy building up and engulfing the room in a sphere of protective white light. standing outside on the roof just outside my bedroom window were two star people. Bryan and I had discussed this and agreed that the circle of energy should keep out any unwanted visitors. After quite some time. trying to solve their dilemma. I was not afraid. They could not get in.Invitation to the Self trying new things on my own. Sure enough. They did not break the energy barrier – the only thing that went through the barrier 194 . to do some testing on me. I distinctly felt a presence. when I had a feeling that I may have a visitation coming. One evening. they used a form of telekinesis to remove a small piece of skin from the bottom of my foot and float it out through the window. they were both wearing loose fitting red clothing and also had their heads wrapped in cloth. they had only come for a one-time shot. but I can say that to the best of my knowledge. so I sat down on the floor and had a good look at them to try and figure them out. I am not exactly clear on what happened. Using my empathic skills. I walked around the perimeter of my room in circles. they figured it out. so I went to the window to look. After falling asleep and entering the alternate reality. Unfortunately for them. I laughed to myself. but curious. I decided to circle my bedroom with white light. a style similar to a turban. and the energy barrier was in place. Strangely. I had never seen this type of being before. they couldn’t figure out how to get in. I felt that these beings were “neutral”. deliberating amongst themselves.

at least it detained them for a while and prevented them from actually entering the room. Way up there in the sky was a bright silvery-white light that appeared to be “rolling” its way upward. well into darkness. 195 . but not a big deal compared to the visitations. an indicator of a coming visitation. I didn’t mind seeing my star friends. Here is an example: During the middle of the day. was gone. I saw UFOs while awake and then later had visitations in the alternate reality. At times. It was always kind of neat to see. I had experienced this before. The light became very large and suddenly. A white flash made us stop in our tracks and look up. Bryan and I were out taking a stroll. I heard a ringing noise in both ears. whether it was putting protective energy around my own body or placing it around the entire house like a huge bubble. I felt the need to protect myself in some fashion or another. I watched for a few minutes and did not see the light again. I spotted a UFO in the clear blue sky. It turned pure white and seemed to explode. but I definitely did not like being poked and prodded by anybody! Preventive measures are always a good way to go. It had been. It was a bright silver object far above me that flew a short distance and then vanished. Three times that day.The Connection was a piece of my skin going out. It was a worthwhile experiment. It had been quite a clever solution on their part. still in the alternate reality. Later that evening. The energy barrier had been a partial success. Every now and then. so I went back to bed. at times. enjoying the cool night air. I ran to the window and saw a red light in the distance. I saw UFOs during the day or at night while I was awake. seemingly imploding into itself. Every now and then. The next thing I remember is sitting up in my bed.

On the way to our room. I was on a peninsula. and myself) experienced a visitation and all recalled some part of it the next morning upon waking. and this time a star person emerged from it. Later. I dreamt the oceans had risen and huge waves were crashing everywhere. and I felt like I was trapped. I saw the silvery UFO once again. but we could still see a faint outline. my entire family (my husband. It went straight up until we could no longer see it. I ran to her and she asked me. I saw my oldest daughter. a bright light shone down onto her bed from the ceiling. My daughter was calling to me in both worlds. flipping its way into the heavens. but they did not come down. I have little recall of this event but do know that near the end of the experience. That night.” which is what I thought at the time from taking a look at her eyes. The following evening. trying to call the star people down for a visit. Apparently. my two daughters. She sat up and looked at me. I was about to join them when my youngest daughter yelled out. My experience begins like this: I was outside with Bryan. with my husband following her. “Mommy. We saw lights in the sky. but then realized it was the same object. an implant was inserted inside my right ear. She jumped up into the light. we were in the alternate reality together. Suddenly. “Mommy!” and I physically woke in my bed. during the course of the night. to say the least. so we decided to go back in the house and to bed. It was very frightening. where are you going?” I told her that I wouldn’t 196 . and the water was coming from both sides. At first. and I could see that she had been “looking into a star person’s eyes. A smaller white light followed it.Invitation to the Self It darkened. we thought it to be two separate bodies. It was a way to board the spaceship.

It began to dawn on me that I was making some kind of serious progress when I experienced my own “graduation. I am not the only person in my family who knows the star people. The star people were treating me more as an equal and less as a student.” The star people were common knowledge to my family. and that seemed to comfort her. From what other contactees have reported. I was gaining more control over my own life and my actions in the alternate reality and Out-of-Body. I was having conversations with them and teaching “classes” with them. She says that we got our things together and all went for a ride on the ship. I also dreamt once again that the water was rising and becoming violent.The Connection go anywhere. One of them got out and walked around the yard. Without realizing it at the time. If you are an abductee/contactee.” I had entered the alternate reality with the star people and was standing at the edge of a 197 . shining down over the street. He was contemplating whether to bring the whole family on the ship or not. and from my own experience. My oldest daughter said that the star people came down in their spaceship and landed in the yard. my husband recalled seeing lights in the house. I was going through a spiritual transformation. but I did not go out. I went back to the alternate reality and watched the lights of the ship through the walls and ceiling of our house. so we openly spoke of them in casual conversation. “Yeah. it is likely someone else in your family is too. it seems that this connection with the star people runs through family lines. And this brings me to the topic of connection once again. In the morning. when my older daughter burst in. My youngest daughter was explaining to us that she saw different colored lights in the road. the spaceship was there.

I stepped into the water. back to the star friend behind me. He kindly encouraged me to go forward. and the bottom hem and the short sleeves were 198 . but there wasn’t much time left. as they threw trash and screamed obscenities. I found myself in a new setting – my family and I were dressed in different colored robes. I hesitated. I noticed little white markings on it and then realized this was something I had been working on during my training.” The colors of the robes showed what “levels” we were on. I went under the bridge and up onto the other side of the lake. where a doorway was opened for me and I proceeded to walk onto the bank. because beyond the bridge there were others who loved me and were waiting for me to arrive. I was told that I had now “graduated” and that I was “ready. but I recall that my robe was white. Across the lake was a bridge on which people were standing and yelling at me. I could proceed forward. which was shallow and easy to walk through. looking from the screaming people before me. saying that I should ignore those people who were yelling.” After this experience. polluted lake. People waiting for me there were very happy to see me. getting ready for my “graduation ceremony. Soon the doorway was clear and I broke through it. I was almost finished with this project. They were saying that I was crazy. A few feet in front of me was a screen doorway. He said that I had done my part in completing the work and passing the tests. When I had completely removed the white markings from the door. A star friend quickly appeared next to me and started pulling white markings off the door.Invitation to the Self large. We both rushed to rip markings from the door. I paid no attention to the nasty people on the bridge. That was not fully explained to me. He was going to help me finish.

and watched in amazement as a key slowly appeared there. Then I gently closed my eyes. singing softly. A craft gradually approached from the east. more like a glow. coming up with my own melody. I was calm. I was standing outside near the ocean. knowing they were near. experimenting with different notes. I watched the sky. It was evening and a breeze was blowing off the water. the star people came for another visit. I held it up with one hand and saw some type of ancient writing appear. just enough that I could see it was there. as I could feel their energy in the air. and I kept singing as I watched it getting closer. My star friends told me that since I was now prepared and did not need their help anymore. As I waited. not a brilliant one. The UFO stopped when it reached me and hovered there approximately 20 feet above my head. I began to sing. Star people and humans were mingling in the crowd. A light shone down from the craft. My singing voice echoed in the thick silence around me. In the stillness. I felt a warm glow in my heart and a knowing that this key was to be used when the time was right. even though I wasn’t sure of exactly what I was proud. 199 . letting the key slip inside my heart where it would be safe until I needed its use. I knew to hold out my hands. I felt it had something to do with the coming Earth Changes. Not long afterward. already in the alternate reality. and I stood motionlessly. I brought the key to my face to examine it more closely. I stopped my singing so I could hear what the key was saying to me. now swaying from side to side waiting to see what they wanted. Strands of hair blew across my face. soaking in the eerie silence.The Connection decorated with a latticework design. they would be moving on to help others. as the words became musical tones. It was an oblong shape and flat. I felt proud of myself.

I sat with Dr. since it was my article that had generated the interest in the first place. the editor of Venture Inward.Invitation to the Self It was getting to the point where instead of the star people coming into my bedroom and dragging me out of my body with a flash of light and a big to-do. 200 . so I’ve been storing them up. they would form something special.R. in turn. I went on to receive a number of “keys” which I placed in my heart. that day. I know I don’t have all the keys yet. During the conference. I met some wonderful people there. The calmness of the meeting made for an unobstructed. and I happily related many experiences while we ate lunch. making the time we had together used more efficiently. Budd Hopkins. I did not have a clue what to do with them.E. but I believe as I progress on my spiritual path I will earn more keys and these. the A. open communication for both sides. who wrote the Intruders book that had triggered my conscious mind. so we were able to discuss the phenomenon. Mack and Karen Wesolowski from PEER. I gladly accepted. will somehow open new doorways. I would go and wait for them in the alternate reality.R. Wesolowski for hours in the garden outside the A. Everyone was openminded and receptive to new ideas and possibilities. John Mack from Harvard University and PEER (Program for Extraordinary Experience Research) and Mr. I was invited to attend the conference for free. in Virginia Beach held its first UFO conference. The experience of being taken from one reality to the next was bypassed. including Dr. I also spoke to Ms. I always had the impression that when they were put together. even the people who had no previous experience with the subject. In 1995. Robert Smith.E. but I felt the importance and privilege of being gifted with them. For part of the conference.

My ties to other people were expanding – human and otherwise.E. This gave me a stronger sense of relevance.The Connection acknowledged my presence and asked me to stand.R. I had never felt so much support before. and I received applause for ultimately bringing this conference to the A. This event made me aware of the fact that many people are interested in the “alien abduction phenomenon” and that there are educated. 201 . serious researchers studying the data. and I felt a little more like sharing this information with others.

Invitation to the Self 202 .

Taking Control Part One overcoming psychic attack 203 .

I heard about a psychology course offered at the local community college. They were very cautious. but they did know of the possible traumas that could be recalled and were not sure if they could handle that or not. It would not budge. Not only did I enjoy the challenge of going back to school after 10 years. I met her there. What they wanted to do was a trial hypnosis. Some abductees undergoing hypnosis have episodes of crying and screaming while reliving hidden memories – apparently. it was also therapeutic for me. not unlike timid mice. I did so. so I signed up.Invitation to the Self During the summer of 1995. One day after class I approached the professor and spoke to her about my experience with the star people. she knew what I was capable of and took me seriously. It was explained to me that the subject of alien abduction was not very familiar to either of them. This was nothing new to me and seemed quite 204 . I went along with the psychologist’s suggestions. that type of therapy session is not for everyone. quickly going into an altered state of consciousness. I engaged myself in the study of human behavior and earned straight A’s. along with another psychologist who was to sit in and observe. including psychologists. pushing down on my arm with all her weight. Her reaction was one of interest. being near the end of the semester. The other psychologist got up and approached me. I had always been interested in the subject. She asked me to hold out my right arm and make it as stiff and hard as if it were an iron beam. to see how easily I could be hypnotized and what might happen. The psychological concept of being able to alter one’s lifestyle through thought control was intriguing. She had her own practice outside the college setting and invited me to come in for a session. and I thought it would be a great way to spend the summer.

Analyzing the data on my own. The glow of candles shone through windows and doors as they 205 . not only was an “altered state of consciousness” quite ordinary for me during visitations. This was a fairytale-like place that held my interest strongly. I was disappointed.Overcoming Psychic Attack normal. hysterical patient in the office who they could do nothing for. In many ways. the two psychologists decided that we could go no further – they were afraid. even those that brought new and difficult situations. so had the experience of psychic attack. What I did not realize at the time was that this absorbing locale had been set up just for me. I tried to assure the psychologists in the room that everything was okay. but at the same time I understood their shared perspective. and I felt that I was in control. It all started while I was in a pleasant dream. My last experience of being rescued by the star people occurred in 1995. I had more control over each encounter. I had wanted to investigate the experiences further. What had not struck me yet was that all the streets were empty. However. There were no other people to be seen. Unfortunately. but Bryan and I had also been practicing meditation techniques together. exploring a new land. An enchanting little town with cobblestone streets and smoke drifting upward from chimneys caught my eye. Their fear of losing control prevented us from going further and learning more. it was easy to see that just as the visitations had evolved. to gain my interest and hold my attention. but I was still quite aware of everything that was going on around me. but I left the office with my hopes broken. I was not in the clear yet. I knew I was in an altered state. I returned home to continue my usual recording of information as it came to me. They did not want to take the chance of having a traumatized.

stretching their arms and legs like rubber to reach out for me. calling me to come closer and have a look. It came rushing toward me. I dropped all other thoughts and came to an abrupt halt. I looked up toward the Pleiades constellation. I refocused all my energy on an appeal for help. I had just spotted what appeared to be a gingerbread house. In a sincere moment of distress. floating in mid-air. they kept their feet planted firmly on the ground. and blew the stars a kiss. I accelerated my flight speed and momentarily lost them. in some sort of trap. I was quite upset that the magical dream had ended.Invitation to the Self opened invitingly. Being quite unprepared for this attack. The men were not able to fly. and I was excitedly hurrying toward it when I happened to notice two men following me. cried out for help. Upon seeing my adverse reaction to them. These unpleasant individuals clearly did not fit into the surrounding environment. desperately struggling to adapt to the new state of mind suddenly thrust upon me. I was sluggish in my movements. I actually hesitated and looked back longingly to the quaint little shops and lighted streets. Instantly. The dreamstate turned into a consciously aware alternate reality event. gradually changing and forming into a glowing ball 206 . but I could not keep up the sudden burst of concentration required to completely lose them. That jolted my level of awareness up a notch and I realized I was under psychic attack. and I reluctantly jumped into the sky to flee the scene. the men broke into a flat-out run. Knowing that I needed assistance immediately. white light flashed all around me. covered with candies and toys. taking chase after me. seemingly coming from the stars themselves. Instead.

More and more of them were leaving the ships to encircle my position. I was careful with the luminous ball as I glanced back up toward the stars. I learned how to focus my awareness and energy where it was needed. there had been brainwashing or programming involved.” I turned my attention back to the ball and threw it into the air and popped it. as well as the rest of the setting. on the ground and in the air. I had no time to think about who they were or why they were doing this. That was the last time I asked for help and the last time I received it.Overcoming Psychic Attack that floated before me. hair in a tangled mess and tears streaming down my face. “thank you. Over the years. sleeping world with no movement around me. as they were surrounding me much too quickly. rapidly closing in on me. From that point on. Unfortunately. but I was not sure. I was immediately confronted by a hostile group of about 20 people. I woke in my bed. It occurred to me that whoever or whatever they were. smiled and whispered. There was no sense in running or even flying. my thoughts were focused solely on how to get away from them. the feelings I picked up from them were hostile and robotic. I gained a good amount of control in the alternate reality and in dream states. I made a conscious effort to be more alert – to always be prepared for anything that might happen. 207 . I was floating in a quiet. falling from silver ships strategically positioned in the sky. I was on my own. The attackers disappeared. I held out my arms and the ball came to a rest in the palms of my hands. These people appeared to be human. I came to consciousness in the alternate reality. One evening that autumn. They were floating down like heavy balloons. I saw my own reflection in the ball.

their programming shut down and they stood there not knowing what else to do. I continued to do this to each attacker that advanced upon me. The eyes were glazed over in an eerie fashion. I glared back into the eyes. What I do know is that I have used the same method of defense against other negative entities. attempting to grab my concentration to gain control over me. rather) by looking through and past the eyes. he jerked and twitched and stumbled around in circles. and from the looks of it. I felt that my only way out was to respond with an attack.Invitation to the Self The first one advanced upon me. When I hit the walls inside their heads. Trying to contain the panic burning at my insides. Not a pretty sight. one of them being a 4-foot-tall star person with big black eyes. When my concentrated ball of white light energy hit the wall. shooting out from an air compressor. as though this individual’s thoughts were really in another place. the wall collapsed. 208 . I do not know why they tried to attack me or who could have done the programming to their minds. I quickly determined that these entities had been programmed to carry out predetermined actions. They seemed devoid of all thought. The entity suddenly stopped. The reaction was always the same – an abrupt stop of all movement. About halfway between the front and back of the head was a “wall” which I could see (or feel. not even thinking about what to do. and promptly found it. It was almost like a shot of air pressure. searching for some weakness to aim for. Instead of stopping and blankly staring into space. forcing me to look into its eyes. I gathered up a tiny. standing there motionless with a blank look on its face. His reaction was a bit different…. condensed ball of my own energy and shot it out of my eyes into the entity’s eyes and to the wall inside its head.

been paralyzed. there were only humans present. it had become very clear to me that there was a secret department of the government with indepth knowledge of “alien” visitations. For me. I was having a picnic in my backyard. did a loop and turned back. Even among negative. You might imagine that. this time a little lower than before. I tried to ignore it. I do not personally have any conscious recollection of this type of experience happening to me. It flew by again. It continued to make passes 209 . by the time I was 27 years old. In 1995. By using some form of telepathy or hypnosis. The few times that I recall actually being paralyzed. it was always more of a side effect of the transition of moving from one state of consciousness to another. It was daytime and the sun was warming the air. The helicopter flew by. members of my own family were also experiencing psychic attack. For most of my experience. and I was not the only one. My family and some of our friends were sitting in the shade of a tree. I have. Not only were other abductees reporting such events. but never while a star person was staring into my eyes. at this point in my life. at times. I knew because I dealt with them quite often. hurtful entities. hoping it would go away. I noticed a black helicopter in the distance. It did not. the abductee is then paralyzed. While relaxing with this good company. I was getting tired of having pests interrupt my enjoyable dreamtime. One night that same year. I have been able to move about and escape their clutches. I have had the ability to move freely among the star people. in a vivid dream.Overcoming Psychic Attack I have heard from other abductees that the aliens will sometimes take control of an experiencer's body by staring into his or her eyes. enjoying iced tea and little sandwiches.

to be able to see lights and objects flying in the sky. I had decided it would be better to throw this stuff away somewhere besides in my own house. Not one of the bullets had managed to hit me. So. near the front sidewalk. knowing it was a “probe” or “bug. I was standing there in plain sight. I just stood there with a curious expression on my face. quite reluctantly and grudgingly. I figured if I didn’t see it. my logic did not work in this particular instance. and each one took a shot at me. I was amazed that I hadn’t gotten shot. It dropped a small wire ring to the ground. I was about to dispose of the items when three cars sped by. yet I was determined not to let this spoil the pleasant afternoon. I gathered up the government “trash” and proceeded to make my way to the garbage can outside. The helicopter came to a standstill. The consensus was that this government bug should be disposed of. I skimmed through it and then decided to make a copy for myself. I saw a notebook full of information about star people. and I 210 . I pretended not to see it. finally gaining the attention of the others and then. I never even moved. myself. so I walked into my house to throw it away. It was common for me to be the only one. hovering just above our beautiful shade tree.Invitation to the Self for quite a long time. Each identical car had a similar-looking driver holding a gun. When I reached the dining room table. about three feet from the road….” We played with it for a while and then broke it into pieces. Well. there would be no way that anyone else would notice it! Unfortunately. Supposedly. The helicopter flew off. then surely no one else would. I picked up the small device in my hands. and if I didn’t speak up about it. a government worker had accidentally left it there. When I was satisfied that I had recorded enough information. in my dreams.

but at that moment I stopped playing around and hastily woke myself up. Upon waking. the actuality of the situation hit me like a Mack truck. with no fear of being directly involved in it. shaking my head in disbelief. This man was somehow organizing the attack. I had to stop myself for a moment to hold back the laughter. I casually threw the notebook and bug away and headed back to the house. and wire-rimmed glasses. “Okay. At that point. According to Bryan. I heard rapid breathing and sounds of distress. For some reason. on the way to the house. I was thinking. He next found himself inside a NASA 211 . you got me. I was confronted by a ninja with a shotgun…. “Why would a ninja need a shotgun?” But. making him look quite menacing. now would I? So I said. I don’t know if he realized I had seen him or not. but then an image was projected into the hand of the star person. He anxiously told me that some government people had taken him inside a spaceship. I wouldn’t want to embarrass the fellow.” He stood motionless. as though he were not really there. aiming the gun at me. the image was only seen in what appeared to be a reflection. This fellow seemed to be observing the scene. Much to my surprise. He saw a star person there who was smiling at him. as pathetic as it may be. he was accompanied by a man wearing slacks and a dress shirt. I quietly woke him and asked him what he was dreaming of. from some other place. to snicker. and when I looked upon him again. the government people wanted him to be afraid of the star person. I quickly looked over to my husband and could clearly see that he was having some difficulty in his sleep. I turned away from him for a moment.Overcoming Psychic Attack thought about how those attackers obviously needed more training.

there had been no spaceship or star person. it is very important to remember that you are not in your physical body. it had all been a projected image used to frighten him. If one managed to get through to me. We are trapped in the physical world. This is the first fact to realize in order for you to overcome whatever is happening to you. or even in a bad dream or nightmare. it became more and more difficult for attackers to affect me. We cannot make objects appear or disappear with our thoughts. For the most part. Even though I was aware that events occurring in the alternate reality were “real. I just began to ignore them. and that is what he had been seeing. we have been conditioned to believe that we are limited in our physical actions. The more evidence I got about the psychic attacks being actual. tied to a chair. the more serious I became about them. subject to the whims of the deities 212 . by the way. were different each time. The only predictable thing was my overwhelming curiosity.Invitation to the Self base. and these defenses. The description he gave me exactly fit the man I saw in my own vivid dream only moments before. I would instantly develop a defense. In reality. but I was learning. He then looked over toward his side – standing right next to him was the man in slacks and a dress shirt and wire-rimmed glasses. Because of this. During a psychic attack. From birth. We cannot walk through walls or fly. where he had been seated in front of a television screen.” I did not yet realize the extent of their reality and connection to the physical world. On the screen he saw distressing images of the same star person and the spaceship. Bryan’s image had also been projected onto the screen. There was nothing predictable about the way I handled new situations. real events.

It is part of you that you can lose. If you fall off a cliff and hit the bottom. Our minds have great difficulty in even contemplating the possibility of having the ability to create and control our own realities. Use your willpower to defeat what scares you. If you are afraid of heights. just like losing weight when you go on a diet. Every psychic or sensitive person is at a constant battle with himself or herself – overcoming fear. the psychic will sense that. You will be pushed off the edge and begin to plummet to your death until you realize. Fear is the great killer. In order to overcome your fear. If your head gets cut off. just stick it back on – it’s not going to hurt you. and everybody has some kind of fear hidden inside. you must face it and deal with it. you can walk through walls and you can fly. You can make any object appear or disappear with a thought. The attacker can create the scene of a cliff and have you standing on it. Your fear is your weakness. so what? Just get up and brush yourself off. You are stronger than your fear. the easiest way to begin to defend ourselves in another reality is for our minds to realize that we are not physical. so we have no limitations. it is a good way to begin to overcome a negative alien abduction or psychic attack. A psychic that comes to attack you will uncover your fear and use it against you. If you are not in your physical body. Because we all have this conditioning.” If you can realize that truth. You are even free to create your own surroundings and your own experience. I’m not in my physical body…this can’t hurt me. Even though this idea needs examination in itself. It is the first thing the attacker will look for. “Hey.Overcoming Psychic Attack that rule our lives. then you have many choices: you 213 . because you have created the fear yourself.

some sensitive people use their gifts for negative purposes. What the attacker wants to do is immediately gain control over you. Why does the psychic want to scare you so badly? When you are terrified. a couple. you can make the whole scene disappear and wake up…. The two psychics. I was in a large auditorium. read Psychic Warrior by David Morehouse. The quicker the better. announced that we were all to be taken hostage. one way or another. you are pretty vulnerable. Please remember that most people who are sensitive or psychic are gentle. In a later episode of psychic attack. you can stop your fall and shoot back up to the edge to confront the attacker. You are focusing your energy on the fear instead of using it to stand and be strong.Invitation to the Self can stop your fall and float gently to the bottom. confronted me. These “military psychics” may be the same government psychics that investigate abductees and contactees. Unfortunately. Think about it – when you are crouched down in a corner whimpering in fear. but that everything would be fine as long as I gave them the information I had “in my pocket. loving people who would never want to bring harm to another. They were trying to scare me into giving them information. you can smash to the bottom and stand back up. There is information being disclosed now about the government performing its own psychic testing and “military psychics” being used for purposes of remote viewing and psychic warfare. It is also very easy to get information from you. it is easy to control you. sitting on some bleachers with a couple hundred other people. For more information on a first hand account.” This was interesting. in the spotlight. because whenever I went to the alternate reality and found something I wanted 214 . standing on the floor. It is your choice. you can fly away. male and female.

I believe that information may somehow be accessed. “Who exactly is going to take us hostage?” He hesitated for a moment. Instead. Now they were actually asking for it. I blurted out. and they faded from the scene as I woke up.” with a rather large ghost chasing us. but that’s not what came out of his mouth. were going to do the job. First of all. I stood up and hopped down the steps. They said the information they were looking for concerned the star people. these supposed kidnappers were old friends of mine from the teenage years. considering that I know a good deal about spirits and ghosts and am not afraid of 215 . Of course. You see. The attackers’ expressions were that of surprise. bumbling clowns who walked absent-mindedly into telephone poles on occasion. this was a ridiculous scenario. as I grow spiritually. The really intriguing thing to me is the information they wanted from my “pocket. “You must be joking!” and cracked up laughing.” On numerous occasions when I was visiting another world or when I was with the star people. landing firmly in front of the male psychic making the announcement. who he identified by name. but it did not.Overcoming Psychic Attack to keep. My family and I were trapped in a “haunted house. I would collect information and stuff it into my back pocket. The attempted information retrieval continued the following night. I asked him. I will learn how to find it again. he confidently exclaimed that two of my old friends. residing within another level of my self. I had expected him to say that he and his female partner were. Perhaps. The threat of being taken hostage was meant to frighten me. I would never have the materials in the morning when I woke…or did I? My opinion on that is changing – I think the information is still there. I would put it in my back pocket.

I dwelled on happier thoughts. curious person I am. more at peace. and they were more powerful than what I had previously experienced…but so was I.” I then entered a dimly lit hallway and saw my mother shifting uneasily in front of a closed door. eventually. I began to feel more comfortable with myself. wearing a 216 . “No mom. “Oh no! The girls aren’t in their room!” Of course. I rose lazily from the couch. Tears streamed down her reddened face as she looked to me and dramatically exclaimed. Now this new type of attack needed a defense. The number of government psychics thinned out tremendously and. a knock pounded on the door.Invitation to the Self them. being the open-minded. I have met lots of them during my travels in the night. the attacks almost came to a complete stop. it is not difficult to run into multidimensional entities from time to time. Staring back at me was a rough-looking woman dressed entirely in black. While I was enjoying a vivid dream of spending time at my grandmother’s house. they’re right here. Eventually.” as I swung the bedroom door open to reveal my children sleeping peacefully in their beds. We easily escaped the “ghost. the attacker would not be able to touch me. By developing this form of defense against psychic attack. I started to believe that I was above the clutches of the psychic attackers and. new psychics managed to reach me. so I calmly replied to her. I came to realize that what I really needed to do was rise above the situation – if my energy was raised higher than the attacker’s energy. Instead of being worried about defending myself. went to the door and peered out the little window through the lace curtain. I knew I could control this state of reality. sweet iced tea. I had been relaxing. watching television and drinking my grandma’s delicious. for the most part. I was right.

I did not let her in. and slammed it shut. but a consciously aware experience. her short black hair sticking out as if she had been running her hands through it in all directions. Instead. In a moment of desperation. The crazed woman began to bang on the outside walls of the house and yell. Thoughts ran through my head faster than I could catch them. I jumped back in shock. first thinking of protecting my grandmother. The black-haired lunatic woman was standing there. Needless to say. and saw her out there. I flung open the front door. Students were listening to a teacher who was at the front of the room near a chalkboard. I quickly ran around the house pulling down shades and making sure the windows and doors were all locked. sitting in the back row at a desk. staring at me with a malicious. Everything seemed to be okay. focused on her favorite television show…but she would not remain in her calm condition if this crazed individual managed to break into the house. but I didn’t know how I had gotten there. I pulled a 217 . I found myself in a classroom setting. I had a few moments of self-composure before I saw her rise from a desk in the second row. fuming with anger. Instantly. it was trying to get in. evil grin.Overcoming Psychic Attack nasty grin on her face. I snuck a peek through one of the miniblinds. I stood as well. I looked around to see what was going on. as I was clearly not in a dream anymore. in this case. going so quickly that I was half-stumbling. Grandma seemed to be oblivious to all the commotion. It was like a wild animal trying to escape from a cage. locking it in place. I had been able to calm myself just enough for a good idea to pop into my head and a chance to catch it. I was panicking. hurled myself through. Luckily. I ran out toward the street to lure the menace away. knowing that this was it – the showdown.

There seemed to be no change in her. One evening while in the alternate reality. it was like greeting an old friend. I fell 218 .Invitation to the Self bow out of the thin air behind me. I remember thinking about what I could do to keep them away from me. but she kept walking. By the time she reached me. After surviving a number of these trials and gaining needed experience. I walked around. I had no choice but to stand and wait as she swiftly approached. at least not that she showed on her face. The arrow struck her in the chest. and imagined an arrow of “white light. waking in my bed. because I was interested in this new area that I had just spotted. and we embraced.” I aimed at my target. I left the scene. I developed new methods of defense on the spot. I began using high frequency energy to stop attackers. in every situation. The arrow of white light had worked. opening my arms in acceptance and forcing a smile to spread from ear to ear. which contained quaint little shops – just like I had done so many times before. inspecting the surrounding environment. and let it fly. I found myself instantly encircled by five psychics. but I knew it was only temporary. With each step she took. I had intended for this arrow of white light to hold a small amount of positive energy and love that would temporarily raise the crazed woman’s awareness. I did not see her again. which was now walking toward me at a good pace. drew the string. As soon as I realized what was going on. I flew straight up and away from them. I was hoping I had lost them. I took a big gulp and stood my ground. then flying a good distance before returning to the ground. She was pleased to see me. the expression on her face changed. the evil grin turned to a soft smile. and her eyes relaxed into a confused but happy look.

fascinated by the various trinkets set out for sale. he reached out for me and we embraced. Fleeting thoughts rushed through my mind. “this guy is good. put a smile on my face and walked toward the man. but my curiosity still had me snared. I had managed to overcome fears that I had built upon since birth. and objects sparkled and drew my attention like magick. I then noticed a blur rushing past the open window. He stood before me in the forest. I have found that the best defense against psychic attack is to raise one’s own personal energy to a level that is nearly unapproachable. I closed my eyes and made myself disappear from the shop. I reappeared in a wooded area.” I wasn’t about to run. searching for a new defense. I felt confusion coming from him but also relief and happiness. Little lights glowed on the shelves like faeries. I had become tired of that option. I definitely did not want to have to deal with them now. I entered the nearest shop. I 219 . The attack had abruptly ceased with no damage done on either side. and a psychic swiftly appeared in the shop. I approached him with my arms open wide in acceptance. one who had been in the original group of five. I found it. I relaxed my muscles.” I said to myself.Overcoming Psychic Attack into their little trap. he was the only one left that I had to deal with. It was a rather large man. let my arms rest down at my sides. In a moment of mixed bewilderment and love. Again I thought of the attackers and tried to raise my energy enough to completely avoid them. I dropped all my resistance. Apparently. “Okay. he dropped his defenses also. not after finding this magickal place. With a quick step back and a dumbfounded look on his face. prepared to attack. He lost track of me for a few minutes but then found me again.

I did not oblige. I was attacked one evening by a negative entity that greatly disturbed me. causing me a great deal of undue stress. What I did then. but one that must be accomplished. One step in raising your energy is to release whatever fears you may have. Love is always a great focus. you must find a way to face that fear and get over it. I believe this was an entity without a physical self. I faced the entity and. In a different sort of experience. around its body to hold it in place.Invitation to the Self have not made it to that level of “untouchable” myself. which many people are. It suddenly occurred to me that this entity did indeed have its own energy that it was using solely to maliciously hurt others and drain their energy. never even thought of doing before. sending it outward to be used for other. wrapped coils. If you are afraid of spiders. using my own blue light energy. I then proceeded to “disband” the creature’s energy. The form that had taunted me all night dissolved into the air as I watched it float off in all directions like billions of tiny white lights. I had never done. if we can drop our fears and anxieties long enough to trust in it. not unlike tentacles. but some type of creature that wanted to scare me out of my wits to steal some of my personal energy. Think about it – WHY does that spider make you cringe? Does your reasoning actually make good 220 . This is a huge step. more useful purposes. This did not appear to be a government psychic. yes. but I am not certain it is even possible for a “reality jumper” like myself. This creature had dragged me through a number of nightmares involving my friends and family. When I had regained my composure. I think the best we can do in situations of confrontation is to be as positive as we can.

Be strong and believe in yourself. your energy will have raised and your odds of future attack will be slim. A psychic attacker will have a difficult time approaching you. let alone opening up an attack. You do not need to look for answers outside yourself – you have all the answers inside. you are the only one you have left. there is a very good probability that you will escape its clutches. Another step to take is to realize that you. are in control of your life. whether that is in the physical reality or otherwise. Absolutely no one knows you better than you do! No one. By the time you conquer your fears and decide to give yourself permission to take complete control of your life. Think about it. When it comes down to it. No matter what your actions or where they lead you. in the end. 221 .Overcoming Psychic Attack sense? Even if it’s poisonous. and only you. By having a strong belief in yourself you can accomplish any goal. That individual had better be very sure of him or herself to step up to you. you are the only person who can truly decide your path in life. and in most cases. You have will power that you can harness. it is not.

Invitation to the Self 222 .

Taking Control Part Two controlling the dream state 223 .

I still dealt with that other part of my life in a quiet way that would not interfere with my daily existence. a talent show. and a play. thoroughly enjoying the companionship and the overall atmosphere of people wanting to better themselves through education. The teachers took time to work with students one on one in a helpful manner. The experiences in the alternate reality became so life-like. changed the nocturnal visitations or psychic attacks. providing a supportive environment conducive to growth. like something special was happening. I enrolled in a course of study at the two-year college. Around 12:30 we made our separate ways off to slumber. focusing on psychology and sociology. I could not tell the difference from that reality and the waking world. I washed up and got into bed. It turned out to be a wonderful learning community. I spent a night at my sister’s house. I felt a yearning for more knowledge.Invitation to the Self Upon completing my psychology class. If I was able to instantly change a setting or fly through a wall. We stayed up late having fun drinking chocolate milkshakes and playing video games and cards. noticing a distinct “magickal” feeling. 224 . None of this social activity. The only true way for me to determine which world I was in was to take control of the environment. however. there was a certain familiar feeling in the air. that sometimes. By the second year of my studies I had been elected president of the Student Government Association and vice-president of Phi Theta Kappa. I knew I was in the alternate reality. manipulating the energy to my own will. During this time period. I had a terrific time organizing events and student activities as well as taking part in an art contest. I became involved with academic groups.

sending him into an outright panic. with sweat dripping down his red face. A man and I were just getting into a car. “hold very still” (so the aliens wouldn’t see us. Approaching with caution. The man beside me suddenly became quiet. This part is a little blurry in my memory. I didn’t see anything else. We were both slightly disoriented as I put the gear in drive and slowly drove forward. I got out and walked with them to their ship. As far as I know. I didn’t understand why. he slid into the passenger’s side. It was dark and I didn’t see any other people around. pleading with me to pull over. Of course. I held an image in my mind of a beautiful totem pole on which various animals where climbing in a spiral fashion. that tactic wasn’t a huge success…. The man was frantic. Consciousness flowed into me and I looked over to see my passenger. the man stayed where he was in the car. until a spaceship flew over the car. he seemed a bit nervous. about five cream-colored star people stopped at my door. I tried to calm him down. which I went along with just to make him feel better. perhaps it was that white lab coat he was wearing. As I lowered myself into the driver’s seat. but it did no good. deserted area through which we were driving. At that point. The only thing I really remember is the thought that some type of operation was done to my brain! I saw a bright flash and found myself back in the front seat of the car. I noticed a small group of star people walking toward us. so I stopped the car in the quiet. in fact. as I was not the slightest bit afraid or nervous. I assume). He lunged across the seat and grabbed my arm. For some reason. he anxiously whispered. I got the impression that this man was a scientist. and bending down to peer into the car. 225 . It was as if the car were the only object existing in a black hole.Controlling the Dream State I dozed off and quickly found myself in the alternate reality. Then.

and the scientist was quite appalled at the idea. I briefly scanned the surrounding trees and then turned toward the lonely building. At that point. A young girl with long blonde hair suddenly moved across the room to take a seat on the throne. I looked up as I entered and saw. I explained that to the scientist. This girl was very special. Nobody’s going to bother us. although I don’t think he really needed the lowdown. I then noticed a gilded chair in front of the totem pole. either. There was no one else to be seen. that the girl I was seeing was me.” He didn’t seem to believe me. and I wondered what kind of operation I had gone through. like a queen. it’s okay. much like a throne. The scientist was still in the car with me. I felt a change in my mind. there was a difference. a picture of the same beautiful totem pole entwined with various animals. Somehow. It gets confusing again here – the girl also had an operation done to her brain. I drove the car to a place where he and I were supposed to do some work. gold with a velvet cushion seat. and wanted to have the operation done in order to be able to do something very special with her life. in a way. He thought it was unthinkable and a horrible thing to do. on the far wall. 226 . We pulled up in front of a white building. I went on to explain that the girl had made this choice herself. but he didn’t want me to leave him alone. We both knew we were in the presence of someone extraordinary. This was a wooded area with a hidden driveway. “C’mon. now sitting quietly. It seemed. The scientist and I just stared at each other with our mouths hanging open.Invitation to the Self I started driving again. and I convinced him to walk inside with me. The scientist followed as I led him down a hallway and to a room that I inexplicably knew we should enter.

Secondly. but then a whole rainbow of colors flowed forth. However. blazing ball of reddish-orange fire in the woods that I explained to myself as “the setting moon. The scientist was staring at me in disbelief. but she never felt enough energy to get out of bed to investigate. I saw a large. at first. Upon waking the next morning. The second time I woke during the night. but I accepted the idea and let it flow. from my bed. It was like Fourth of July sparklers. I asked my sister how she slept that night. 227 . I tried not to make the sparks too large. I was mistaken about that as well. as loud noises on the roof kept waking her all night. My fingers had never actually spontaneously burst into sparks of energy before. but then I thought it was pretty cool. I was quite surprised. it was in the wrong spot – the actual streetlight was a bit further down the road. First of all. as though he’d had quite enough for one night. She replied that she hadn’t slept too well. The sparks were mostly colored white and silver. because I could feel that energy wanting to explode. this light was shining from a more elevated spot in the sky and was quite brilliant and focused. knowing the man was frightened and I was just scaring him even more. The first time. I looked out the front window. sparks of energy began to shoot from my fingertips. upon careful inspection that morning and then the next night. He had a terrible look on his face. and saw a bright light shining down on the street.” Obviously. it was certain that the bright light I saw could not have been the streetlight. I remembered rousing from my sleep a few times during the night. Even though I really wanted to let loose with it. I explained this to myself as the streetlight.Controlling the Dream State As I was explaining all this to the scientist.

When I wanted to fly. Flying became almost second nature. Step by monotonously slow step. but would then be promptly dismounted. Lifelong goals that I had strived to achieve in my dreams for years and years. climb on and ride. Trying to analyze the situation. anywhere.Invitation to the Self This time in my life was a turning point. For years. for some reason. I worked my way up to being near one and finally getting close enough to reach out and grab it. My flying skill had also developed. I was gaining more confidence in the waking world and in other realities as well. in my dreams I was never able to catch a horse and get on its back. In order to dispel any confusion about the differences and similarities between these types of events. It still took concentration. after I had done it a few times. the novelty wore off and I went on to other things. after about 20 years of failed attempts. Years of practice where now paying off. Throughout this book I have spoken of dreams. For example: horseback riding in my dreams. I would jump up and soar across the sky with little effort. Interestingly. I believe it had something to do with my own spiritual growth and reaching a level at which I had control and was in touch with my higher self. Finally. out-of-body experiences. I had always loved horses and had ridden a few times in the waking world but. I was able to hop up and float in the air anytime. I will elaborate further: 228 . but I could not get on. but not like before. and the alternate reality. now becoming a pure joy. I was able to get on the horse’s back. I was now able to accomplish. I was able to calmly approach a horse.

It is not normally associated with the mundane issues of daily life. The energy may be more easily manipulated than in the physical world. using energy to create or destroy in the astral plane takes a greater 229 . dreaming is a time to rest and consider life. Some are in first-person view and some are seen from another perspective as though one were watching a movie. Some dreams are more vivid and detailed than others. • OBE – Out-of-Body Experience takes place on the astral plane. but not as easily as when in a dream. a dream is just a dream. This type of experience allows for spiritual growth and knowledge of the self. It does not allow the same conscious state of awareness attainable during out-of-body experience or an astral plane event. but you will feel the density and thickness of what your astral body passes through. but daily events may bring an OBE on. and also in color. Dreams come in black and white. and fears. but no matter what type of dream it may be. You can float through a wall. namely the astral self. moving the wall of a room to the opposite side or setting it at a strange angle. The astral plane may appear similar to the physical plane at first sight.Controlling the Dream State • Dreams – We dream of possibilities. Unlike dreams. One’s state of mind may have a direct effect on what types of dreams one has. but objects will shift about and even mirror the physical world. Our dreams are subconscious images working their way through conscious interpretation. This type of event involves one level of the self. separating from the physical body and bringing consciousness with it. filled with symbolic meaning. hopes. Dreams may give insight to help guide us through our daily lives.

I saw my horizons broadening and I knew that education was the key. In this type of experience. It is a matter of belief in yourself and knowing that you are in control. I wanted more. In 1997 I graduated from the community college with my Associate in Arts and Science Degree. the art of energy manipulation does not come easily. calm control and focus is what matters. but when it is done. I optimistically applied to a prestigious four-year college and was accepted. needless to say. • The Alternate Reality – The alternate reality is entirely different. I decided to major in cultural anthropology. including 230 . This is where abductees and contactees typically meet the star people. Being interested in psychology and sociology with a growing interest in cultures around the world.Invitation to the Self deal of concentration and effort. it is amazing. By forming a clear thought and focusing it in your mind. It was an exciting adventure for all of us. I delivered the valedictory address to my graduating class and received three standing ovations – I was quite pleased with the whole thing. because your state of awareness is very similar to a waking state of consciousness. What happens in the alternate reality will ultimately affect the physical world and the other levels of the self. Before trying to slip through a solid wall. The process takes a little longer and requires more focused energy on your part. you can accomplish anything. it requires much practice. However. In 1998 my family and I relocated to live near my new college. you must think clearly and set it in your mind. Still. Human behavior.

Bryan and I both volunteered our time leading ceremonies at the local Unitarian Universalist church. watch television. the energy in both may be directed and altered to suit 231 .Controlling the Dream State my own. and behavior. learning as much as possible. “nontraditional” students for lunch and to hang out. My state of mind in dreams and in the alternate reality was sharper than it had ever been. development. And theories of the origin of life and humankind’s development over the ages were quite intriguing. I also took part in activities outside the school setting. I did. My focus was clear. I think the anthropologist Clyde Kluckhohn sums up my feelings about the subject best with this quote: "Anthropology is the science of human similarities and differences. mutually unintelligible languages. Even though dreams do not allow the same level of conscious awareness as the alternate reality. I didn’t join any social groups within the college. meaning that I had a good deal of control in the way the dream or experience went. Anthropology is the study of human origin. or study. considering my “multicultural” experiences with the star people. Bryan worked not only as a chef but also as a lifeguard. talk. and I did archaeology and spent a lot of time swimming – one of my favorite sports. was fascinating to me. however. It provides a scientific basis for dealing with the crucial dilemma of the world today: how can peoples of different appearance. as I desired to focus strictly on my studies. meet three times a week with a group of older. and dissimilar ways of life get along peaceably together?" It seems only appropriate that I should be interested in understanding different cultures and ways of life. a place that recognizes and respects all religious views.

The next thing I knew. Nonetheless. I saw that things were a little different than they should have been. and would not come back home this soon. I would go out-of-body and visit some friends of mine. I was still lying on the bed when I noticed a rather strange sensation on my forehead.” I could almost see a triangular shape there when I closed my eyes. I kept my eyes shut for a few minutes. I was confused but went along with it. since he usually gets up very early to leave for work.m. After a few unsuccessful attempts.Invitation to the Self one’s desire. traveling without my physical body was no big deal. as I mentioned already. as though I could feel my “third eye. “Why are you home so early?” He casually replied. At that point. I felt like I was wide-awake. but a sneaking suspicion tugged at my senses. taking a seat at the kitchen table. I had been awake for a while and didn’t have to get up quite yet. I was getting up out of the bed and walking into the kitchen. so I wanted more rest if I could find it. Bryan was just coming in the front door. around 6:30 or 7 a. I was happy to see him. so I smiled and asked. everything seemed to be in its proper place and functioning normally. trying to get a better look at the shape on my head and feel the sensation there. I was surprised. Looking around me.” and no more explanation than that. as something felt out of place. He stepped into the kitchen and walked toward the food cabinet.. I turned 232 . And. I decided that since I was lying there feeling bored and did not have to start my day yet. I examined his movements. One morning. but I wasn't quite sure that I was. “I came back to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. at times it was difficult to discern which reality I was in. I was lying in bed trying to go back to sleep. I did my visiting and then returned to my body.

The temperature was way higher than it should have been . and I knew they needed their heat and oxygen bubbles working. I didn’t do anything to prepare for them but. A few months later. vivid blue color. As I went through the kitchen and living room. Standing water in the backyard was a beautiful. Luckily. I was confused about what world I was in. I had a similar experience. "Yes!" as he continued making his sandwich. I went to check the fish tank. during the night. My interest drew me to the window. I slowly rose from my seat. I checked the light switches and the refrigerator. As I passed through the dining room. I looked over to the aquarium and saw that it was still functioning. now relying only on my inner self for true answers. first thing. I then realized this was not my normal waking reality. All the electricity in house was shutting down. and I woke myself up. the lights went out in those rooms as well.Controlling the Dream State to Bryan again and asked. so I wasn’t worried. In the morning. I decided to get out of bed and walk around. It was the only thing that still had electricity. I then thought about how this (electrical abnormality) happens quite often during visitations. but I figured that my star friends were around. wondering why everything was off except for the fish tank. "Am I awake? Are you really here?" He looked up with a grin on his face and said. no fish were hurt from 233 . which revealed intensely bright colors in clear and sharp detailed images unlike anything I had ever seen in the physical world. Before going to bed that night. My only concern was the fish tank – I had tropical fish at the time. I felt the star people nearby. electricity still on.a whopping 86 degrees Fahrenheit! I quickly removed the heater and the lid of the tank and poured some cold water in. scanning the house. the lights went out.

I wanted to work with the local Native American Indians and write a sort of “ethnohistory” about the people and their culture. What was similar to the previous experience. including the Chief. I attended tribal meetings. I had taken part in and conducted anthropological field research already. During his interview. I quietly and respectfully asked if he knew about the star people. I contacted the tribe’s senior clan mother and then waited for months with no reply. and other types of ceremonies. when Bryan came home early to make a sandwich. The year 2000 was my last year of college. as my whole family was accepted into the tribe as good friends. I felt honored and privileged. They had to make sure that everyone in the tribe and the spirits agreed with it. that is. but it was not time yet. He began to tell 234 .Invitation to the Self the incident. My professor and I both knew this project would be a lot of work. She invited me to a tribal meeting and a sweatlodge. She said that she had been praying for months and talking to the other council members of the tribe about my project. I was allowed in. sweatlodges. I took a strong interest in indigenous cultures with a focus on Native American Indians. I conducted private interviews with a few of the tribal members. when I was beginning to wonder if I should change my research topic. I received a call from her. Fortunately for me. I tried several times to open a line of communication. First I had to assure her there would be no archaeological “digging up of her ancestors. including archaeology. For my senior research. was the acute level of conscious awareness in a reality other than the physical. if I could even manage to get the people to talk to me. Finally.” as some anthropologists tend to do. My time spent with the Native people was wonderful.

and a timeline and map of their history and movement from place to place. my family and I returned to our quiet home. That way. I did not forget how the “Indians” had helped me in my alternate reality experiences. At the same time. so I tried not to complain. but I did not want to bother them.” We smiled at each other in a knowing way. just as they had said they would after my graduation from their school. Instead. My research with the Native people ended with an ethnohistory. interviews.” He stared into my eyes for a few moments and with a warm smile replied. I believe “we are all related. with large lapses between visits. I did not like it much. as they say. as I desired to find a good-paying job in the field of anthropology. My ancestors came from the Stars…from the Pleiades. and it made me feel a connection to the Native people involved with this project. participant observation. I knew they were busy with their work. “Yes. I was 235 .” I graduated from college in the year 2000 with a BA in Anthropology and decided to spend time working on this book. They were staying away. I still knew they would hear me if I spoke aloud to them. and I hoped it had been helpful for them to have the information recorded. In fact. including archaeological evidence. in an environment we were used to – a slow-paced life perfect for writing a book.” I turned my tape recorder off and looked at him in all seriousness and said. because I missed seeing them. It was not an easy decision. I only saw the star people sporadically. we were near our extended families.Controlling the Dream State me about special pieces of meteorite that had fallen from the sky and how they called them “star people. The project had been very successful. I know of the star people. “I’m not talking about meteors…. I got a part-time job and spent my other days homeschooling and writing.

which was shining down over another object. I looked up to the sky and saw the sun shining down over the moon. Three bodies this time. I knew I had been going through some rigorous training…the problem was that I did not know what it was all for! 236 . “You need to use everything you’ve learned now – you’ve been training for this since you were a baby. As usual. people were getting sick and dying before anything could be done about it. I knew that the energies of the Earth were changing and that I would see the star people again soon. Upon exiting the room. I had new symbolism to figure out. I could not make out what the third object was. It was appropriately labeled “confinement. In the spring of the following year. He told me that in order to escape from the chaos. like that of a planet.” I understood what he was saying on one level. It was spreading so quickly. In October of 2000 I dreamt a vivid scene in which a virus was intentionally being dispersed around the world.Invitation to the Self patiently waiting for the time when we would be together again. I did not understand these messages and images in the sky. I went down a hallway to a closed door. I would need to spend time in confinement. I was sitting on a bed of tiny flowers with a star person in an alternate reality event. and somehow. The star person turned and said to me. We were looking at a photo album together. but this would take a while. I quickly gathered my family members and asked an elderly gentleman for help. but the shape seemed to be of another large round body.” so I went inside. it was filled with pictures of me throughout the years. I stayed there for a while and eventually found a way outside. I knew it was an important sign.

unfortunately. In one vivid experience. with my husband and two daughters. The possibilities were endless. and I knew this. There was the persistent threat from government psychics. Anything I could imagine. All I had to do now was determine what I was facing. but there seemed to be something even more. I had graduated from their school and was pushed out the front doors to face the world on my own. The star people had proven to be benevolent beings. The walls were lined with dusty shelves that held boxes and boxes of toys. with thick dust and cobwebs draping from the corners of the tall ceiling. Anything I could imagine I could bring to life. large room. These wooden shelves stretched imposingly all the way up to the towering ceiling and there was no ladder or other means to 237 . had basically left me. many of them were filled with despair. It seemed it had been deserted for some time. I was standing in an old. I had learned to propel myself through alternate realities. I could bring about. whatever it was. at least. my friends. I believe our relationship had been a symbiotic one of give and take.Controlling the Dream State The star people. which I had begun to overcome. like a warehouse. An intense silence closed in around us. as I watched my visions come true and. that’s how I felt about it. my focus had turned from trying to figure out the star people and visitations to defending myself and trying to figure out the government involvement! I also knew that the world was changing. learning from each other. Indeed. I knew I felt compelled to help abductees. vanishing and reappearing in flashes of white light. The year 2001 brought dreams and experiences of confidence and control. Left me to continue on my own…but what exactly was I continuing? It seemed like it was important.

ready to take a dip in the warm waters of the Gulf! I excitedly investigated my surroundings. I contemplated changing the contents of the box. The doorway opened and I proudly walked through. but the middle had been a doorway that had been closed over long ago. as the footholds were only small protrusions jutting outward. I climbed up the face of the wall. I leaned my head back to bring it into view. When I reached the top of the wall I extended an arm toward the sun. which was difficult. It flew down from the sky and brilliantly absorbed into my chest. noting that we were. My mind began to ponder the limitless possibilities. The task seemed a bit daunting. The two end sections were solid. I levitated the box from the top shelf and floated it down to her. “I want a jump rope!” With another mindful thought. I successfully accomplished the feat and watched her pull a rope from the box. Another evening I dreamt I was taking part in a ritual in which I had to scale a brick wall and touch the sun. With a strong sense of determination and a concentrated thought. I came to the conscious realization that I could grab and move anything with purely mental energy. in Mexico where I had wanted us to be. and there we were. one that was nearly touching the ceiling. thought.Invitation to the Self reach the higher racks. The wall was made of three sections. My youngest daughter asked me if I could get a box of toys for her. indeed. 238 . “What kind of toy do you want?” I asked her. “Hey! Do you want to go to Mexico?” Everyone nodded in anticipation as I focused my energy to transport us to the beach. but I decided to take the challenge. I was absolutely thrilled with this discovery – the freedom of being able to change any situation with a thought.

I waited until I was about five feet away. To remain calm and observe why there is fear leads to greater understanding. I felt a promise of opportunity filling my heart with a surge of abounding joy. but when I get scared now. to a level I had not previously known possible…to be so carefree.Controlling the Dream State The very next night. Throughout the years of experience with the star people. Instead of smashing into the ground. I do get scared. step by step. He was in his castle. I have learned that behind the fear is valuable information. Without warning. This was the first time in my life I had attempted this little trick. flying head first with arms and hands stretched out behind me. or even thought of it. for that matter. The joy in my heart was indescribable. which was positioned on the edge of a towering cliff. Most of the time. and to achieve true freedom – freedom from fear. laughing all the way. then slowed and floated to the side like a leaf falling from a tree. I try to use them as the tools they should be. I aimed straight for the ground. The self-confidence I experienced enabled me to raise my energy up a notch. I was in the alternate reality meeting with a king. I jumped from the balcony as the king yelled out and gasped in amazement as he watched me plummet to the bottom far below. As I stood there with him. how to confront my fears and take control of them. to attempt any action. I had learned. looking out over the beauty that lay before us. I use the fear as a warning to be alert and to stay calm. unspoiled land of colorful forests and rivers winding through mountains. I joined him on a balcony overlooking a beautiful. this understanding enables 239 . Instead of letting emotions overcome me. I do not mean to say that nothing ever frightens me anymore or that I am like a solid brick of non-emotion.

I could barely make out movement before me . I was just gaining consciousness in the alternate reality. new obstacles present themselves in order for the experiencer to learn more and progress even further. I was able to enter and control dreams with minimal concentration.Invitation to the Self realization to come forth . I stood my ground. I should know by now that whenever a doorway is opened. The alternate reality became a whole new world to me – one that I could not only control if I needed to. and it was a time to experiment with them as well. The action was sinuous and flowing as figures of shadow wormed their way up from the ground on all sides. with the newfound level of awareness. that I was afraid simply because I did not understand. I was confronted by a group of entities that were nothing like anything I had seen before.that my fear originated in ignorance on my part. trying to focus my eyes and pull myself into awareness. As you may have guessed. I was taken off guard. I was not affected by any attempts made. not knowing what to expect. I had become a bit slack with the psychic defense issue. The psychic attacks had temporarily come to a standstill. A blow came from my right side and then from the left. not even realizing what was happening at first. I almost lost balance but was hit from the front and 240 . I had raised my energy so much in such a short amount of time.something unnatural was working its way into my vision. I had been above the possibility of attack for so long that I had almost forgotten how to deal with it. it also allowed me to see amazing things that were probably there all the time but had gone unnoticed. This was a relaxing time for me to just enjoy the skills I had learned. Unsure. However. my eyes were reopened for me. having the new level of awareness that I did. In this unexpected event.

Controlling the Dream State straightened myself. The entities continued their barrage, making eerie noises in an attempt to frighten me. More than anything, it was beginning to irritate me, so I woke myself up. I thought about the situation for a few minutes and felt angry about being bullied. I just could not understand why any entity would feel the need to attack someone who was happily floating around, not meaning harm to any creature. I decided to go back into the other world and teach them a lesson. I pondered the possibilities for a little while, knowing that I was tired and did not have a great deal of energy to fight with. As the thoughts ran through my mind, I realized it did not matter how much energy I had to spare; what mattered was the quality of the energy. I reentered the alternate reality and found the bullies immediately. Utilizing just a little bit of the energy I had, I encircled myself with a bubble of blue light. I then imagined that a whip-like tentacle was attached to this bubble. When the entities rushed forward to attack me, the whip grabbed them one by one, pulling them toward my blue energy. Upon contact with my energy bubble, the entity’s own energy dispersed, causing the form to disintegrate and the energy particles to float into the air to be used in another place. Upon completing my mission, I suddenly felt a presence behind me. At once, I turned to see five military helicopters hovering behind me, observing. I woke. Had it all been a set-up in order for someone to observe my attack/defense methods? A few nights later, I found myself aboard a UFO. This was quite strange, as it seemed that the UFO occupants were not the ones that had transported me there – it appeared that my curiosity had done that for me. These star people were unlike any I had seen before, with an

Invitation to the Self insect-like appearance and a not-so-happy-to-see-you attitude. I walked down a corridor, passing numerous star people who stopped and stared at me, wondering why I was there, or maybe how I had gotten there. I even saw a familiar-looking, small star person with grey skin and big black eyes. I almost stopped and gave him a friendly pat on the head, but quickly thought better of it and stopped myself. Finally, an insect-like female approached and indifferently asked if she could help me. I asked for something to eat. She tilted her head in confusion, like a dog sometimes does, then turned and walked off. She came back with what looked like ice cream, and I gladly accepted it. The next thing I knew, I was sitting with her at a table, doing a puzzle. This puzzle was a matching kind, comparing the human skeleton and insect-type star person skeleton. After attempting this puzzle without much luck, well…you know me – I got bored so I started walking around the ship again. At that point I woke up and thought they probably got tired of me and sent me away! Because I had grown spiritually, my experiences were changing. Even though I had always been curious around the star people, there had been a sense of uncertainty at times. Now there was never any anxiety or fear. I walked among them confidently, knowing I was free to do as I chose. I was happy to see them, always smiling, often chuckling. They had a difficult time getting me to hold still – not that I didn’t want to comply; my curiosity had always gotten the best of me, and having control in that alternate reality made it even worse. I was fascinated; enthralled with being so free and aware of the possibilities of life. Nevertheless, the star people had a fascination for me just as I had for them. The feelings were mutual, and I imagine that is why the


Controlling the Dream State insect-type star people at least humored me by taking time out to do a learning puzzle. After that point, when I did see the star people, it was only to hear words of encouragement and warnings of impending danger. I was to be on the lookout, to watch for the signs they had given me. It was confusing, because I didn’t know what to take literally. I didn’t know how to decipher those visions in the alternate reality to make them fit life in the material world. Still, I remained alert to all possibilities, keeping an open mind. On August 20, 2002 I experienced another psychic attack in the alternate reality. I was standing in the living room when a woman entered the front door. It was an older lady, wearing a very nonthreatening dress, decorated with lace and flowers – something a grandmother might wear. Her hair was short and curly, greyish in color. She was also wearing a pearl necklace. Immediately, I knew what she was and I adjusted myself accordingly, pretending to be her friend but ready for anything on the inside. She offered me the opportunity to wear her necklace. Approaching me cautiously, she unclasped it from around her own neck and then adamantly looped it around mine. I distinctly heard her thoughts in my mind, and I knew the necklace had some type of tracking device embedded in the silver clasp. Satisfied with her work, she walked out the front door, and I proceeded to make my way to the bathroom. I removed the pearl necklace and wrapped it around the base of the toilet. I’m not sure why I did that...I think it was something about the device not being able to pick up any signals around the porcelain base. I slipped in and out of consciousness inside the experience, eventually “coming to” on a couch near the window. I was still in the

Invitation to the Self alternate reality. I sat up and looked out the window, astounded to see a multitude of “tornadoes” rising from people’s homes and disappearing into the clouds above. Somehow, from the depths of my mind, came the realization of what was going on, and boy, did I get angry. Propping myself up to face the outside, I let out a deep growl; a sound that resonated from my chest and throat, sending out an intense, deep vibration that momentarily disrupted and broke the tornadoes apart. They did not reach into every house, but select homes. I knew what they were and I was furious. Streams of energy waves spiraled upward toward a central source, such as a satellite. The embedded chips under people’s skin made it easy for the government to track and monitor every movement they made. Most people slept soundly in their beds, quite unaware of what was happening to them and around them; they had no clue that radio transmitters implanted in their own bodies were collecting and sending information on a regular basis. The elderly psychic lady reentered the room as I slowly rose from the couch. I glared at her with images of “tornadoes” shining in my eyes. She jumped back and cringed in a corner, holding her hands up to her face. I released the image and smiled, leaving her very uncertain about what to do. She quickly fled. I had been dreaming of these thin tornado-like shapes for years, never sure of what they were. Now I had seen a disturbing picture of what could actually be the truth – the implanted devices were indeed used by the “secret government” to keep track of and attempt to control sensitive people through psychic attack.

Controlling the Dream State People who come up with new thoughts and ideas that may cause others around them to ask questions are seen as a threat to the secret government and actually, to society as a whole. These people are sought out and attempts are made to coerce them into conforming and living “comfortable” lives, not disturbing the boundaries of our bubble-like world, leaving the shell intact and under control. It doesn’t even matter who it is or on what level…even members of your own family can shoot down your “far out” ideas. Your neighbors, groups you belong to (church, school, etc.) – these are the people that usually accomplish the feat of making you conform. However, if that doesn’t work, the job has to be taken care of by others such as this secret government. Obviously, if you get too out of hand and no one else can control you, you have become a threat. Whatever this secret government is, it wants to keep power more than anything. It wants to keep the human population in control with as little resistance as possible. This is why they have used holographic images of star people and fake alien suits to confuse people like myself who normally perceive the star people as being friendly. Much to my surprise, I encountered a visit from the secret government not even a week after seeing the ugly truth about the tracking devices. For the first time ever, I was approached by this group with an openness that was quite disturbing. Not only did they confirm for me that this elite project does exist, they made an effort to gain my trust and my “membership.” The encounter began in a dream-like state. I was hanging out in a small café with about eight members of an exclusive club. This brought back memories of college sororities and fraternities, but not exactly – this club was a profound example of what corruption and

in fact. I did want to join them in the hunt. but there was an underlying deception that I could not pinpoint.Invitation to the Self money can bring an individual. I watched them leave. I was handed a bow and two arrows. grabbed the string with the fingers of my right. I tried to go along with the situation while I analyzed it. an awareness that I was fully conscious of. although I was not sure what they were hunting. it snapped.” and wanted to know if I would join them. pondering the invitation. and stretched my arm to its full reach. the dream had become a reality. They were planning a “hunting trip. Almost in slow motion. and I sat there for a short while. as if I were very unsure about what I was doing. The group was comprised mostly of men. I did not see any females. told jokes. I held the bow in my left hand. I showed interest. I approached them from behind. I held back as they left the café. I then looked down and noticed that I was standing in about three feet of snow. I had wanted to practice pulling the bowstring to get used to the draw of the bow. and seemed to be having a great time. but never gave them an answer. I left the café and proceeded to make my way through the alternate reality until I found them near a wooded area. They seemed to be sincere. preparing for the hunt. but they already seemed to know I was coming. The snow 246 . my empathic skill told me they were playing a little game that I could not figure out right away. When I pulled the string back. They laughed and drank. I was confused about their intentions. A few of them turned to smile and urged me to join them. as my curiosity was nagging at me. I decided that I wanted to go. At this point. Even though the people seated around me were happy and friendly toward me.

that is for sure. Layered cloth enrobed him. unable to decipher the event that had just taken place. The bright energy in his eyes shone past the wrinkles and leathery skin to reveal my friend who I had not seen in so long…not in this lifetime. On Christmas morning 2002. I sat in awe. His intelligence and wisdom filled the air around us. in fact. I had recalled him being a type of scientist. forming the words in my mind.Controlling the Dream State began to fall harder as I lost awareness of that reality and woke in my bed. and I bathed in it and soaked in as much as I could. we had been working together on a project that was not yet complete.” Heaviness fell around me and a chill ran up my spine as the thought scrolled across the front of my brain like a neon billboard. very old friend. Apparently. I entered the alternate reality to meet with a very. I could not believe I had been able to forget something so important. I slowed down and tried again. did I feel like I was being pulled from all sides. My excitement turned to laughter and then tears as I recalled the bond between us and the closeness we had felt for so long. he couldn’t either. covering his 4-foot-tall being. Never before had I felt this energy…in this type of situation. A feeling of bewilderment overcame me. making him look somewhat like Yoda. “What you call the ‘secret government’ has just invited you to join.” Boy oh boy. but uttered babbling sounds that made no sense to either of 247 . during some psychic attacks and then whenever I saw the “eyeball. In a surge of exhilaration I blurted words from my mouth that came out in a jumbled mess. This event was extremely real and brought forth deep emotions that I did not know were within me. This was a one-of-a-kind meeting with someone I had not seen in ages. one that I had consciously forgotten. I had experienced the feel of this group before.

it did let us confer with each other that the experiment we were working on was still in progress. I then realized that my position in this project was one of participantobservation. Then I remembered what I had done so many times before. I tried my best to stay calm and clear-headed. I touched his face as we shared feelings of recognition and love. We were no longer able to communicate with speech. I knew that our time together would be brief. The experiment had something to do with communication between the worlds. My friend seemed to think I had full conscious knowledge of what was going on. As we embraced one last time. and grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil. but the results were the same.Invitation to the Self us. I was filled with despair. as I rushed to think of a better way for us to share information. and the thought of not seeing him again for another lifetime filled me with dread. I was the one out “in the field” while the others were in safer. a change in the atmosphere. It quickly became clear that our communication had been drastically limited to sight and touch only. Although this was not a clear communication either. I was shocked and embarrassed at how easy it had been for me to forget. but the truth of the matter was that I was just recalling it as he relayed the information to me. he began to fade from my view and I wondered in anguish if I would see him again during this lifetime or if I would have to wait 248 . It was very plain to me there was not much time left for our project. Something had happened to the air around us. He tried to speak as well. more familiar locations. perhaps a vibrational change that prevented us from performing actions we had been used to in the past. He had come to gather a kind of progress report.

Bryan woke up and held me as I mournfully related the experience to him. and whom I could not communicate with now. sobbing. with deep and long breaths that seemed to permeate my entire being.Controlling the Dream State until I passed over into the next world. I sat upright. 249 . Sadness filled me as I thought about the friend who I had not seen in ages. Three flashes of lightning filled the early morning Christmas sky. and I watched a small white light flashing in the neighbor’s yard until it blinked out of existence. I felt very alone as we were slowly ripped from each other and separated once again by the distance between worlds. I slowly faded from the experience and woke in my bed. practically wailing.

Invitation to the Self 250 .

Taking Control Part Three energy manipulation 251 .

Perhaps it is because they believe the dreams are too difficult to attain or perhaps it is a matter of being afraid of facing the ridicule of others. we go to our 9-5 jobs. Imagine for a moment that you have six months left to live your life. you have to think about these things. they let go. think about the people you love. You can take control of your life or you can let your life control you. Is that what you really want to accomplish during your lifetime? Do yourself a favor and break out of that shell! Use that energy you have stored inside of you. What would you do? Would you be worried about what others thought of you? Would peer pressure hold sway? Or would you leap at the chance to live your life as fully as possible? To make your dreams come true? In order to gain control of your life. We are made of energy and we require energy to survive. and I developed logical thoughts…but I 252 . Think about the things that really matter to you. day in and day out. I was consciously aware of my surroundings. and think about what kind of difference you want to make in the world. realizing that I was more than my physical self. our entire world is completely made of energy. You know it’s there…it has been waiting there for you to open up to it. What kind of mark do you want to leave? Many of the dreams people have. Instead. In fact. sense-dulling rigmarole every day . I could move my head and look at whatever I wanted to. So…if we could regulate this energy. You need to reach into your heart. same boring.Invitation to the Self You have a choice. All it needs is a crack in the shell and a little push to break through. could we not regulate our world? This just happened to occur to me while I was first caught up in the alternate reality.stuff that doesn’t even matter.

and I was there flapping my arms. splashing each other and laughing. the air was thick like water. It was almost like swimming.Energy Manipulation was not in the physical world . The laws of physics were not in effect. pretending I was flying. my feet every now and then leaping off the ground. We were jumping in and out of the pool. I jumped up and down. My rational mind focused on this fact and I began to wonder. I never doubted it. When I discovered this other reality. I felt that somehow. I tried to fly. do I still have to abide by the rules of the physical world?” So. one in which I was awake but not limited in my movements. I was just a kid then. I kept trying the jumping and flapping technique until it dawned on me that I could utilize a 253 . but I had always wanted to experience that freedom. I was floating in midair. I took a chance and tried my seemingly impossible idea. and everything around me was made of energy. the more progress I made. to run and jump into the rushing wind. take flight and soar like an eagle. allowing me to temporarily take flight. My parents have a videotape of my cousins and me playing in the backyard on a hot summer day. flapping my arms with great determination. if I was persistent and I pushed hard enough. and what happened then changed me forever. even though it was exhausting and time consuming. I tried something. I was happy and I didn’t care what anyone else thought about it – I knew that somehow I would learn to fly.that was clear. Although I was in another reality. I used to run around flapping my arms all the time. “If I’m not in the physical world. and the more I jumped and flapped. flying through the warm air. For a few short seconds. I would be able to accomplish this feat. I was still made of energy.

I sensed that something was going on. I made an appointment with a cardiologist. I woke with a slight feeling of alarm but was not sure why. I am soaring through the skies. This is a fact that many people know but do not acknowledge. I started having painful heart palpitations. and I was concerned about having a heart attack. When you are able to realize that you and your entire environment are created with energy. It took a great deal of concentration to power the thought. When you believe in yourself. The same goes for the energy that runs throughout our bodies. I had always had a slight heart murmur.m. A few days before my scheduled appointment. and this required energy. We were to meet at the hospital where I would undergo a series of tests to discover the problem. directed. the easier it became. We already know that energy can be harnessed and directed – take electricity for example. I had an encounter. This energy can be harnessed. looking out the windows periodically to see if anyone was coming. It took years for me to simply have the thought to just jump up into the air one time and float there weightlessly. At about 3 a. you can alter the energy any way you want. and controlled by concentrated thought. you can accomplish anything. Nowadays I simply have the intent to fly and. but nothing so serious as to cause the sudden pain and discomfort I began to experience then. I was walking through my house. without much effort. It got to the point where just about anything could trigger these palpitations.Invitation to the Self different movement. Bryan had also gotten up. In my earliest dream of the night. Let me give you an example: In late 2001. but the more I practiced this new thought. so I went to check on my 254 . I was waiting for someone to arrive.

your heart is not receiving a steady flow of electricity.” I was shown a symbol of a spiral that was more square than circular. They were fine. This is an energy problem. Upon inspection. He was extremely intelligent and informed me that he had to stay on his silvery metal “island” or he would die. they almost felt like spirits. the entities all agreed there was no physical damage to my body. a different entity was there to check an organ of my body.” The day before my hospital visit. with great attention. On this island was a teacher. She spent over an hour with me and 255 .” He was a silvery-grey color with large black eyes and no tail. She was an older lady.Energy Manipulation daughters. one with her blankets kicked off. with large glasses and thin white hair. I went back to sleep. I walked back to my bedroom and said to Bryan. When I came to the last remaining room. “Isn’t it strange how we both woke up at the same time?” Then the town’s fire alarm went off and I felt a little frightened. This device is not working properly. I went there with him. After about 20 minutes. but apparently restless. thoroughly looking it over and then putting it back into place. I pulled them back over her and put protective white light around both of them. a little girl approached me and said. “Your heart has a small electrical device in it that controls the energy impulses. taking it out of me and.” I woke up repeating these words in my mind: “Your problem is electrical. The heart was saved for last. I wandered off to explore this island filled with numerous small chambers. I am not sure if they were star people or not. “meditation. whom I recognized. So. Each time I entered a room. As my eyes began to focus. I asked her how I could fix it and she replied. I saw a very weird “cat. I met with an astrologer friend of mine who does psychic readings.

She suggested I draw the symbol on a piece of paper and put it under my pillow that night and ask what it meant. I went to the hospital and had the tests done. I said to myself. Stop it right now. still having sudden bursts of severe pain in my chest that caught my breath and made me still with fear. The cardiologist studied the data and finally said. not the alternate reality where I had “power” to control my surroundings.000. “It means electricity!” I laughed to myself in amusement and woke up feeling assured. “NO.” He concurred that there was not actually a physical problem that could be fixed. I went into a dream and was briefly met by the same entities I had seen previously. saying. taking a bite off my fork. I drew the spiral-type symbol on paper and placed it under my pillow and asked the spirits to tell me the meaning of the symbol. somehow an electrical problem just didn't sound as bad as a physical one. I was able to regulate this electrical or energetic problem with thought. I decided right then and there that this was over. I was later mailed a bill for approximately $2. she could see no physical ailment and expected my examination with the cardiologist to go very well. experiencing painful palpitations the entire time. I was.Invitation to the Self decided there was nothing wrong. a pain hit me and I stopped. That same evening my family and I went out to dinner to celebrate the good news. While I was sitting there. There will be no more of this!” The pain instantly vanished and NEVER CAME BACK. They yelled at me like I was stupid. Well. 256 . I then told her about my experience with the “spirits” and the spiral symbol I was shown. “It’s an electrical problem. however. I was now facing my fears in the physical world. My husband looked over with a worried expression to see if I was okay.

Energy Manipulation To me, this was astounding. I had control over my body the whole time…. When I went back to work a few days later, I told everyone there about it, and guess what they said – “yeah, I’ve done that before” or just nodded their heads in agreement like there was nothing mysterious about it at all! So why is it they couldn’t have told me this earlier and saved me a whole lot of unnecessary pain as well as $2,000? Were they afraid to suggest that such a thing was possible? All the time they knew this could be done, while I was suffering with so much pain I could no longer work. As I was saying, people seem to know these things subconsciously. It was not once suggested to me that I try this technique of just telling my body to stop giving me the pain, but after I had done it, it was simply obvious to everyone around me that I could have done it all along! People know the “secret” of energy manipulation. It isn’t something that we talk about often or maybe not even think about often, but it is there. So my question is, why don’t we do it all the time? I believe the answer to that question is mental conditioning. We do not talk about or dwell on these ideas because we have been taught not to. The physical world is based on energy that we have the ability to manipulate. If we can control our physical bodies with thought, then why don’t we?! The same thing goes for our individual perceptions of life and the paths that our lives take; we have chosen our own paths and we choose to travel them, whether they are happy and fulfilling or otherwise. We each have the ability to bend reality in such a way that our lives can be changed. This is another way of using energy. A simple thought can change your life.


Invitation to the Self In the alternate reality, I was able to control what happened around me by concentrating on a single thought. I developed a particular intent and focused on it until it became a reality. So I began to wonder…is the energy of a thought so strong that it can alter one’s physical existence as well? I believe the answer to this question is yes. Perhaps there are differences in what can be accomplished in the physical and the alternate realities, but I have seen evidence of it and I do not intend to dismiss the idea. Maybe it is just a matter of perception and belief. In late 2002, I began to study the existence of energy in all realities. I came to realize that all realities are connected in some way, and this has to do with an intricate weaving of energy. The possibilities dumbfounded me, turning over and over in my mind. I had known for some time that realities other than the physical did exist. However, I had no idea that these worlds were blended within one another – not just sitting side by side, making them accessible by stretching out to the sides in order to grab them, but by reaching within. That concept made it a little frightening, knowing that entities from other worlds were not far away and separate at all, but part of the energy swirling all around me and within me. While I was discovering these new ideas, I sat down to read The Art of Dreaming by Carlos Castenada. I had read all the Don Juan books many years earlier, but it was not until this latest work that I made the connection between Don Juan’s “second attention” and my “alternate reality.” From the detailed descriptions that Castenada gives, they are one in the same. So for those of you who know his work, perhaps this new insight will be helpful for you in imagining the alternate reality in which visitations take place.

Energy Manipulation In January 2003, I entered the alternate reality, arriving in a place that I had been to only rarely. It seems that, just like having a silver cord that kept me from wandering too far from the Earth, my body has a built-in mechanism that prevents me from jumping too far ahead of what I can handle. Here, everything was alive and even the air seemed to have its own thoughts. It was not unlike a liquid, resting heavily on my skin, connecting every organism to the next, each affecting another’s movement. The energy was malleable, easily formed and manipulated. I walked out my front door to the sidewalk and stood looking down the street. As I quietly and carefully looked only straight ahead, I noticed movement close to my left side. I knew the tree in my front yard should be right there, so I assumed the wind was blowing the branches. I then realized there was no wind; in fact, the air was quite still and there was no sound. I turned to get a closer look at the tree, seeing flows of orange, yellow, and green energy flowing from the branches. Even though the tree is a Maple in the physical world, it appeared to be a Willow in this place, simply because of the delicate, sinuous energy that flowed forth from the branches. I felt happiness inside myself upon seeing this energy, but at the same time I was concentrating on what else could be moving around. I looked up to the night sky, and instead of seeing the familiar stars and constellations, my sight was filled with geometric shapes floating in spirals and other patterns. As my eyes popped into wide-open mode, I looked back down in haste, as I was fully aware that my actions would bring consequences – if I stared at that sky for long, my energy would attract attention from the beings up there, and I did not know exactly whose attention I might grab. That frightened me, so I decided to focus on more earthly

Invitation to the Self aspects of the experience. Of course, my curiosity got me and I looked up once more to see shapes floating by in all directions. I had encountered this place before and I knew how easy it was to send, receive, and direct energy. I forced myself to look away. Perhaps the most frightening thought is not having control taken away, but having too much control. Having the choice to decide what does and does not exist, or what will happen and what will not happen may be the very thing that stops us from taking control of our lives. It seems to be so easy to live in a world where most things are decided for us. All we have left to do is to go about our daily business according to the consensual laws of our physical reality. I decided that while I was there in that fluid, highly suggestible environment, I would try something. I wanted to call out to a friend of mine, to see if she could hear me and then meet me there. I yelled out her name and waited. I could almost see my words trailing off into the distance. I imagined that the energy from my voice traveled through that viscous air to wherever my friend was at the time. I had no idea if this would work, it was just an experiment. I called to her again, optimistically hoping to see her walking down the street toward me. I had used energy in many ways in the alternate reality, but I had never summoned a friend with it, and I had no experience using energy in this particular world. I called out to her once more, but there was no response, just the silent world pushing against me on all sides. I returned to my house and began to head upstairs to my bedroom, when the front door swung open. “I’m here, it’s me, I’m here!” I turned to see my friend running toward me, out of breath and laughing. We embraced and all the while I was thinking, “I can’t believe that actually worked.”

Energy Manipulation That reality and the physical reality are intricately woven together by the energy that crosses all barriers. This energy fills our spirits as well as every construction we have ever created. In the other world, my house was still my house; it held the same energy. Although it visually appeared to be somewhat different and was painted a different color, I still recognized it as the house in my physical world because it was still shaped by the same energy. The tree in the front yard was the same tree from the physical reality, I just perceived the energy differently. That life-giving energy exists in all levels of reality, meaning that WE exist in all levels of reality. The next day, I was sitting at my computer doing some writing, but my mind was still thinking of the reality I had experienced the night before. I recalled the thickness of the air and the flowing energy. I closed my eyes and tried to relive the feeling of being there. While I was sitting there in a semi-meditative state, thoughts began to pop into my mind. The words that came were based on the energy I had felt in the alternate reality, but pertained to all energy. This is how it reads: “Step lightly and slowly. Stop and look around you. See the energy alive in all things. You have that energy as well. It can blend with the energy surrounding you. All energy is shared. This brings the feeling of oneness. Knowing that we are all made from and share the same energy. Stand still in the silence and stillness. Feel the air on your skin. Hold your hand in front of you. Bring it to your face. Open your palm, face up and let the energy flow out and up. Create an apple there. You have harnessed the energy around you and within you to create. This is possible on all levels. Energy flows in and out, all around. There is no


You know they are alive and you know that you are part of them as they are part of you. The trees use the same energy you do. The star people hear you when you speak to them or when you blow a kiss. You know that all people are one. the restraints they themselves have made. You know this. Energy can be used to bring about change in the same manner. as we all do. People have separated themselves from each other for so long. fix your intent. It makes no difference. that you have had since you were a young child.Invitation to the Self end and no beginning. because they feel the energy you send. It is ridiculous. They love you because you know that. this energy may be used for any purpose. Set your mind. This is why you can talk to anyone and they will feel your spirit and they will feel their own spirits. it is a continuous cycle. You share the same energy. focus your energy. This is the feeling of “knowing” you talk about. You never forgot the connection. to be together in love. they have forgotten what it is like to be one. They forget the ties and the bonds that connect us all. Most people do not know this. someone else will. it is so easy to reach out and grasp that energy and that love. There is no separation. If you do not use it. but those who do will manipulate energy to their will. You are connected. There is energy in everything. because you are freely sharing that energy and it 262 . if people would just open up to it and set themselves free of their own restraints. They live in fear and sadness. It is available to all to use freely. and you acknowledge that. It is a matter of intent and focus. The only separation made is by people themselves who feel the need to be apart. It is there to use. Now draw in the energy floating around you. for good or bad. We are all connected.

It is a feeling of self-identity that you may feel near your heart or solar plexus. They are interconnected. You have strength there. We are all one. mental. and spiritual health is directly connected to your well being in the alternate reality. Your physical. You can control your reality on all levels. just waiting to be used. the part of you that controls willpower and everything else about you. I always played with the trees and the animals around our log cabin. So take a moment to feel the energy inside yourself. if you are not one of those lucky few. Our energy surpasses any “boundary” we perceive. deep down inside – not what your job is or the schedules and tasks you run through daily. forming many levels of the self. Some people may be fortunate enough to already be doing their life’s work. because we have created the boundaries for ourselves.Energy Manipulation makes people aware of the connection we have with each other. Of course. blending into one another.” The feeling of “knowing” that is mentioned goes back to my childhood. we just have to remember it. but the person 263 . many people believe that young children bring knowledge with them but forget this wisdom after years of conditioning by parents and peers. Wouldn’t it be great if we could all remember those things we knew when we first arrived in this world? I think we all hold a great deal of knowledge within ourselves. we can control it on all levels. Your condition on one level will affect your condition on all levels. In other words. There is no true separation between the realities. if we can control energy in one level of reality. I knew that everything was alive with energy. This is the center of your energy body. think about who you really are. However. even then.

You have that choice to make. Begin to make a plan of how you can accomplish your life’s work. All the parts of your self are energetically connected. You will soon find that you have more control in the dream state and when you travel out-of-body. conscious and subconscious decision. and learn through living. spread your wings and take flight. By taking control of your physical world. Take hold of that feeling and go with it. you can do it. It may sound difficult. Take it step by step and work towards one goal at a time. It will take dedication and a great deal of energy on your part.Invitation to the Self you dream to be. you are utilizing your creative energy and molding your reality. Your being will emanate a new sense of self-confidence and positive energy that will change your energy patterns in all levels of reality. You came into this life to accomplish something – what is it? 264 . Now you have to take action. subject to the tides of energy that will decide your fate for you. Feel that power and imagine what you could be – what you want to be. and once you have that foundation laid out. Write it down on paper and look at it. you begin to take control on the other levels of reality as well. to live to the fullest extent. Your other choice is to remain a bystander. It must be an all-around. manipulating energy. You can take control of your life. but you can do it. No matter how large or outlandish it may seem. This is your right as a human being. Think about how you can start to change your daily life in small steps that will bring your concept to life. there is nothing stopping you. In this way.

believing they are physically awake when in actuality they are not. foreign life forms. the alien visitations do not take place on the physical plane. I can confidently state that there are many worlds just as perceptible and real as the physical. To live through the ordeals of visitation and still exist normally in the daily world requires a great sense of self. I believe that for the majority of experiences. The only symptom that seems to show itself among these people is a type of post-traumatic stress disorder. Abductees/Contactees may be easily confused by the extreme genuineness of the situation. According to Dr. Many people who share this same experience have also changed and grown spiritually. The humans involved are transported from their physical bodies to another 265 . For those fortunate souls who can take the experience and transform it into a lesson and test of character. As this writing comes to a close. which obviously stems from the unfathomable experience of confrontation with unexplained and bizarre. it has taken my life and transformed it. and other psychiatric professionals. there is much to be learned.Conclusion Regardless of what alien abduction or visitation by the star people may actually be. These people need to be taken seriously and listened to with open-mindedness. For many. I assumed it was a physical one…not knowing there was any other type of experience to be had. and that the greater part of my experience took place in a reality other than the material world. I did not know there were other worlds existing along with the material one. When my visitation experience began. the typical experiencer has no mental abnormalities. John Mack of Harvard University. it does not occur that anything other than physical experience holds relevance.

For quite a while.conscious level of the self – an aware state of consciousness where one is awake and living a real. not knowing what was going on. Why. discernable event. While I was undergoing operations and having ovum extracted. I don’t know. I do believe. although perhaps not immediately – my awareness of that would come later. conducting their typical procedures on abductees/contactees and then leaving this physical world to return to a different vibrational frequency where they normally exist. they may be from another plane of existence. another reality. I am not so sure the star people are really from the stars. The truth is. it is beyond our level of normal perception. and I sense the stars and planets as being part of our physical reality. I drifted through the visitations in a confused daze. My experience has carried me through various stages of learning and growth. I’ve become used to the label I gave them. we 266 . It took years to put the pieces together and form some semblance of recognition of patterns and symbols. as humans. they worked with me through intense psychic training. however. but the experience grew into one of give and take. Where do the star people come from? When I gaze up at the stars at night. I saw the star people two or three times a week. a reciprocal interchange that brought benefit to everyone involved. that some abductions may take place physically. it’s an easy way for me to recognize them and talk about them. When the visitation consciously picked up at age 20. the physical laws as we know them may be manipulated so that the star people are able to work on this plane for a short period of time. or perhaps they exist alongside us in our own world and we are not able to perceive them – kind of like a dog hearing a dog whistle that we humans can’t hear.

bringing my mind to an alert state of consciousness. just as the visitations themselves were. The star people constantly provided me with one type of protection or another. After the failed “frequency lock” by the psychic development people. my “alien friend” and I being chased by the “bad men. the attacks slowed greatly. the star people knew about the secret government and the psychics that relentlessly harassed me to obtain information about them. Even to this day. when a new. the intensity of the psychic attacks did not pick up until I refused to freely hand over information to the secret government. Such is the way with the alien abduction phenomenon. at first rescuing me from difficult situations and then by placing “marks of protection” on my person. and I was treated with respect. However. and even to work things out in our own minds. and 267 .” However. so did the psychic attacks. They were very careful with me. unrecognizable experience presents itself. if I happen to suddenly find myself in the alternate reality. whether it was human or alien. we are just now in the process of getting a grasp on the information to form rational thoughts and ways of communicating about the subject. In my personal experience. brand new symbols and ways of organizing must be developed. We are learning. As the visitations from the star people picked up. I quickly prepare for anything that may come my way. I was trained to defend and protect myself against any attacker. The repetitive “dream” I experienced when seven and then nine years old gives the first hints of government involvement. It seems to me that the government involvement was taking place all along.categorize and label our collective world in order to share knowledge and communicate with one another.

I “graduated” from the star people school and was compelled to use the newly gained knowledge on my own. each one having its own rules and flows of energy. so I continued to develop through new experiences. I would advise any abductee/contactee to try and calm the self enough to be able to observe what is happening.were deterred even more so when I learned how to rise above the situation. No matter if you want to permit the visitations to continue or to stop them altogether. I had to let go of the fear in my heart. I have known that energy is alive in all things. preventing psychic attack from occurring. With the knowledge gained through my experience with the star people. In this way. In order to begin to harness this information and make use of it. I knew that if I could master the laws of any given location. I was able to begin the study of controlling the dream state and the alternate reality. it connects it. Knowing the basics of energy manipulation. with or without the star people. I slowly came to know that the energy not only flows through the whole of creation. I needed my entire self to be open to that flowing energy. You will not be able to come to grips with the situation if you do not begin to understand it. I began to explore new worlds. All my life. to realize that I was part of it. flowing in and out of the whole of creation. Also 268 . I would be able to come and go freely and experiment with the varying flows of energy that weave through everything. you absolutely need to have a level head. The intense years of training began to pay off. as I used what I had learned to advance to new levels of understanding. Then came the challenge of discovering those laws and learning how to use them and exist for a short time in those places. and then to feel the connection – my connection to all beings.

If. What you experience on other levels of the self is just as valid and important as what you experience physically. aware state of reality besides the physical. taking in every possible view and then pushing yourself to go further. when you are alone and feel you are ready. This may help to explain many occurrences that have not been explainable previously. Work your way up until you are able to focus during visitations. and they will hear you. This will shift your awareness. Tell them they do not have permission to see you anymore and if they try to. You can start by focusing your attention on a simple item in your dreams and viewing all the details of that item. Once you have found your sense of self and know who you are inside. In the comfort of your own home. bringing you into a more conscious state. speak out loud to the star people. you are much more than your physical self. If you do not wish to see them. practice bringing your consciousness into focus during your dream events and visitations. giving yourself a good measure of control. One person’s experience may be an ordeal of great proportions while another’s may be an occasion of thoughtful contemplation and learning. Remember. the whole universe will know and they will be held accountable for their actions. you will be able to stand up to the star people and make your will known. Try looking at the world from different angles. You are an energetic being capable of existing in realities beyond the physical.consider that the visitations are occurring in a conscious. Do not discount its worth. you want the visitations to continue and that relationship to flourish. on the other hand. How you deal with any situation depends on the way you perceive life. tell them that in no uncertain terms. 269 .

Free your mind.your multi-dimensional. 270 . endlessly creative self has no boundaries.

• Psychic attack – an assault of directed psychic energy affecting the mind. • Secret government – an organized group covertly involved with the alien abduction phenomenon. • Out-of-Body Experience – consciously takes place on the astral plane without the physical body. Star people – the “aliens” or multi-dimensional entities. affecting the mind and body. • Hybrid – a genetically altered person of both human and star person origin. • Implant (“bug”) – a small device inserted under the skin. • • • Screen memory – a false image or scene created to hide the truth. Visitation – an encounter with the star people. 271 . • Earth changes – prophesied physical and spiritual evolutions on the planet Earth. possibly a type of radio transmitter or monitor. • Energy manipulation – controlling subtle energy with learned techniques such as concentrated thought.The Glossary • Alternate reality – a place other than the physical world in which conscious awareness is experienced. • Dreams – subconscious images affecting the mind but not the physical body. • Transitional phase – a movement from the physical reality to the alternate reality and then back again.

alienabductionhelp. 272 . a research and support group for abductees and contactees.You may contact Bonnie Jean Hamilton online at Hamilton House.

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