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A CALL TO WINGS

Behind every great man is a great wingman: Michael Jordan had


Scottie Pippen, George Bush the First had Dan Quayle, and Han
Solo had Chewbacca. But sadly you can't just snap your fingers
and find a Dan Quayle, so I have been forced to scrape by
without a permanent wingman for the last few years. But no
more!
I am in the market for a new wingman. Below is my "Application
to be Gary Knox's Wingman." If you think you're up to the job -
and let's face it, you're probably not - please complete the form
and email it back to: Gary.Knox@asu.edu

- G. Knox

APPLICATION TO BE GARY KNOX’S WINGMAN


PERSONAL INFO:
Name: _______________________

E-mail Address: _____________________

Alias: _______________________ (e.g. Jack Package, The Barnacle)

Special Skills: _______________________(e.g. PowerPoint, speak


German, Masseuse)

On the scale below, please rate your attractiveness.


Ted-----2-------3------4-------5-------6-------7--------8-------9-------
10---------Gary

SHORT ANSWER:

If you were my wingman and we had to entertain 5 women at a


noisy bar in Scottsdale with one of them being a “Mother Hen”
what game would you run, and why?

MULTIPLE CHOICE:
1) What percentage of chicken was found infested with bacteria?
(12/4/06, Consumer Reports)
A) 32 %
B) 3 %
C) 97 %
D) 83 %

2) You are claiming to be the session’s drummer for Van Halen.


Who could NOT be your lead singer?
A) David Lee Roth
B) Gary Cherone
C) Sammy Hagar
D) Barney Stinson

3) For some reason, you're pretending to be British. Who is your


President?
A) Tony Blair
B) Winston Churchill
C) Margaret Thatcher
D) Trick question - Prime Minister

4) Women do not enjoy jokes about their...


A) Face
B) Shoes
C) Intelligence
D) None of the above

ESSAY QUESTION:

In the space below, talk about a person who has made a


significant impact on your life.