Convergence of Saturn and Earth Predicted to Occur late 2013

Dr. Sugob Remonortsa of the Utilitarians for the Study of Astronomical Phenomena (USAP) has announced the approach of a rare convergence of the orbits of Earth and the planet Saturn. “The two planetary bodies will remain millions of miles apart,” Remonortsa explained, “but the parallax of their separate orbits will cause Saturn to appear many times larger than the full Moon in the night sky from December 18th to 20th.” The astronomer explained that because Saturn is a gaseous planet of a density that would permit it to float in water, there is no risk to life on Earth from its approach that is close only in cosmetological terms. “The gravitational interflux will be minimal,” he noted, “Such spectacular views of Saturn and its rings last occurred in the year 843 B.C. and will not take place again until 4096 A.D.” The Hubble Space Telescope will be focused on the image of Saturn and its moons and pictures of unprecedented clarity are expected to be captured. Within two weeks of the convergence, they will be posted online at The impending convergence has been independently confirmed by astronomers in Europe and Asia. All urge calm on the part of the public during this rare celestial display. Dr. Ami Rekaf of the Point Peak Observatory noted, “Past manifestations even of comets have led to episodes of mass hysteria. All should thoroughly understand that no danger to this planet or life thereon exists.” It is anticipated that the best views of the convergence will be during the early hours of December 18th and 19th, and optimally from 30 degrees to 60 degrees latitude. Hotels in the target zone have already begun to be filled with reservations from scientists and skywatchers from all parts of the world.

Illustration courtesy of USAP

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