Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev. Rev.

12/29/90 01/07/91 01/15/91 01/18/91 02/07/91 02/13/91 02/15/91 02/19/91 02/22/91 02/26/91 02/28/91 03/18/91 04/03/91

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THE ADDAMS FAMILY
by Larry Wilson and Caroline Thompson

Rewrite by Paul Rudnick

based on the characters of Charles Addams

SHOOTING SCRIPT April 11, 1991

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/6/90 FADE IN: A1 EXT. ADDAMS MANSION FRONT STEPS - CHRISTMAS EVE A1

A GROUP OF CAROLERS, their eager faces upturned, SINGS an endless and cloying roundelay of "Little Drummer Boy." They sing with self-righteous good cheer. As they pompously begin their umpteenth verse, THE CAMERA SLOWLY PANS UP THE ADDAMS MANSION -- past the black wreath on the front door, past broken windows, weather-beaten shingles, a creaking shutter. THE CAMERA CONTINUES TO PAN TO THE ROOF where the Addams Family members, GOMEZ, MORTICIA, GRANNY, PUGSLEY, WEDNESDAY, and LURCH, their faithful butler, gleefully POUR a CAULDRON OF BUBBLING, STEAMING PITCH over the edge. AS THE CAULDRON TIPS, THE CAMERA PUSHES INSIDE, THE BLACKNESS OF THE PITCH FILLS THE SCREEN. TITLES BEGIN. DISSOLVE TO: 1 INT. DIM HALLWAY - SEVEN O'CLOCK A.M. C.U. AN OVER-SIZED "CUCKOO" CLOCK -The clock is a perfect REPLICA OF THE ADDAMS FAMILY HOUSE, down to the creaking shutter. It chimes the hour. In ONE WINDOW, a LITTLE MECHANICAL GOMEZ bends a MECHANICAL MORTICIA back until she's almost off her feet and plants a kiss between her clockwork decolletage. One, two, three mechanical kisses, counting toward seven o'clock. IN ANOTHER WINDOW, A MECHANICAL PUGSLEY hangs a MECHANICAL WEDNESDAY from a noose on a gallows, up and down. Meanwhile, little BURSTS OF FOG float off the rooftop where a little MECHANICAL GRANNY cranks her fog machine. The front door of the house pops open, and a MECHANICAL LURCH appears and begins sweeping. Just then, THING, the disembodied hand with the full-bodied personality, CLIMBS into view over the back of the clock. Thing leaps to the floor and SCAMPERS down the hall. LOW TRACKING SHOT follows Thing along the hallway. (CONTINUED) 1

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 1 CONTINUED:

2. 1

He runs past a couple of doors, past a pair of LEGS in pajamas, feet in bedroom slippers. He skids to a halt and BACK TRACKS to the legs. He pulls on the cuff of the pajama bottoms. They belong to GOMEZ, who stands in the doorway to A2 INT. FESTER'S ROOM A2

Gomez wears a fez and a smoking jacket over his pajamas. Even at this early hour, he puffs on his trademark cigar. Gomez is all enthusiasm or all despair. At the moment, he radiates unfathomable woe. GOMEZ Think of it, Thing. He's been gone for twenty-five years. For twentyfive years we've attempted to contact Fester in the great beyond... The room is a dusty, cobweb-filled, long-unoccupied shrine to Gomez's lost brother, Fester. Gomez drifts in from the doorway. The room has remained untouched since Fester's disappearance as a teenager. The thick coating of dust and cobwebs adorns the mementoes of a rapscallion's youth - a football pennant from Alcatraz, headless sports trophies, a high school photo with all the other students keeping as much distance from Fester as possible. As he lovingly and morosely surveys the room: GOMEZ ... And for twenty-five years, nothing. Not a whisper, not a clue. I'm beginning to think my my brother truly is lost. Gomez sighs. the B2 Thing TUGS at his cuff, pulling him towards B2

INT. HALLWAY - SAME TIME Galloping ahead of Gomez, Thing leaps onto an old-fashioned door latch and the door swings open INTO

2

INT. GOMEZ AND MORTICIA'S BEDROOM - SAME TIME Gomez approaches the bed. is... MORTICIA (CONTINUED)

2

Asleep on scarlet satin sheets

Morticia OPENS HER EYES. A dark Garbo. he crawls out of his human-size pajamas. sultry and remote. incisive. darling? MORTICIA (passionately) Oh.I would die for her. still on their poles. 2 Low-voiced. yes.SAME TIME A3 3 Pugsley crouches on the floor. "Dangerous Undertow!". smiles are rare. Either way -. then SHRINKS to the size of a mouse. The ghostly whiteness of her complexion is offset by the red of the pillowcase upon which her hair is spread like a diabolic halo. are stacked in the corner. This tubby energetic monster of a nine-year-old boy has every chance of growing up to be the public monster his parents would be proud of. CUT TO: A3 3 OMITTED INT. "Keep Clear! High Voltage!" SAWED-OFF STOP SIGNS. In another corner stands a CYLINDRICAL FLOOR-TO-CEILING FISH TANK. Pugsley SWALLOWS it down. Grin- He contorts. The walls of his room are covered with road signs he's collected -. with Morticia. The brew steams. ning wickedly. GOMEZ (adoringly) Unhappy. 3. playing with his kid-sized chemistry set. "Detour! Excavation Ahead!". PUGSLEY'S ROOM . and subtle. He MIXES chemicals in a beaker.what bliss. yes. Laughing. undergoing the beginnings of a transformation."Bridge Out!". I would kill for her.11/28/90 2 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (gazing at Morticia) Look at her -. she's a ruined beauty. Completely. FILLED WITH PIRANHA.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . CUT TO: 4 OMITTED 4 .

The trap door is flung open. along with a collection of glass eyes. On the bedside table beside her. As she languidly drapes herself across his chest. CUT TO: 5 A6 OMITTED INT. Wednesday drops her tooth in the box. She sits on a stool among the stored Addams' family objects. Wednesday opens a cigar box. THE OTHER TIED TO A TRAP DOOR. Inside the box are assorted human and animal teeth.11/28/90 A5 INT.... WEDNESDAY Thank you. GOMEZ (wildly aroused) Tish.. il me perce comme un poignard. A5 Solemn and mournful. ten-year-old Wednesday has black hair and white skin like her mother. Wednesday's pulled tooth swings at the end of the string.. In a foul mood. she is caught in a sudden shaft of sunlight. that's French! MORTICIA (nonchalant) Oui. Morticia's OVERSIZED CARNIVOROUS ORCHID WILTS. She squints. Granny tromps up into the attic. Cara mia! (CONTINUED) GOMEZ 5 A6 . GOMEZ AND MORTICIA'S BEDROOM . fangs and dentures.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .SAME TIME 4. GRANNY pokes her head through. ATTIC . the sun. Grandmama.SAME TIME Gomez takes Morticia in his arms. ONE END OF A STRING TIED TO HER TOOTH.. GRANNY You kids are going to have to kill your own breakfast this morning. MORTICIA Gomez. She's a giggly hag who looks like she was in the bathtub when the hairdryer fell in.

In the background.. Morticia brushes her hair with a silver filigree brush. CUT TO: 6 EXT. drawing his bedside saber from its sheath and BRANDISHING it at the offending beam. then. instantly aflame. CUT TO: 7 INT.where's your fog? (CONTINUED) 7 6 GOMEZ MORTICIA .SAME TIME At the window. is malfunctioning this morning. struggling to churn out its patches of fog. You frightened me. Gomez pokes his head out. howling demon.12/3/90 A6 CONTINUED: 5.! The FOG MACHINE. Do it again. You were like some desperate.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA AND GOMEZ'S BEDROOM ./EXT. Gomez.. you were. GOMEZ En garde monsieur sole! He thrusts and parries. unhinged. straight out of a Jules Verne nightmare. Gomez? Querida? MORTICIA Last night. GOMEZ (disturbed) Granny . LEAPS from the bed... GRANNY Lousy bucket of bolts. pantomiming a duel with the shaft of light. A6 He kisses his way up to her neck. suddenly bursting with enthusiasm and a sense of purpose. ROOFTOP .SAME TIME Granny delivers a swift kick to her fog machine.

missing decapitating Gomez by millimeters. The bags' contents wriggle. WEDNESDAY (taking her bag) Thank you. (CONTINUED) 8 9 . It crashes below.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Lurch. smashing through the front porch roof.11/28/90 7 CONTINUED: FROM ABOVE 5A. He holds two brown paper lunch bags in his enormous hands. a reanimated stitched-together behemoth. ENTRANCE HALL . 7 the fog machine hurtles downwards. CUT TO: 8 9 OMITTED INT. the gigantic family butler. eager to escape.LATER Standing beside the front door is LURCH.

THE ADDAMS FAMILY . shattering the bowl. Judge Womack hurries to his broken window. GROWLS. GOMEZ AND MORTICIA'S BALCONY . NEIGHBOR'S HOME . and peers inside. shaking his fist: JUDGE WOMACK Damn you. Judge! Keep the ball! I have a whole bucketful. the Addams' CRUSTY PATRICIAN NEIGHBOR.SAME TIME JUDGE WOMACK. Addams! CUT TO: 13 EXT. and Pugsley closes the bag.Thing serving as his tee -. is having his breakfast when Gomez's golf ball lands in his cornflakes. opens it. 11 ONE OF THE GOLF BALLS flies with incredible speed THROUGH THE WINDOW of the ADDAMS' ONLY NEIGHBOR. Gomez waves back. covering him with milk. He holds up a bucket of golf balls. CUT TO: 10 EXT. (CONTINUED) 13 12 11 .SAME TIME FROM THEIR VANTAGE POINT -it appears to Gomez and Morticia that Judge Womack is waving to them. BALCONY OUTSIDE GOMEZ AND MORTICIA'S BEDROOM SAME TIME 6. GOMEZ (calls) Sorry about the window.while Morticia sips tea. 9 Lurch 10 Gomez is HITTING GOLF BALLS -. This well-tended HOME sits on the hill overlooking the Addams' Mansion like some Republican sentinel.11/6/90 9 CONTINUED: Pugsley takes his bag. CUT TO: 12 INT. He tosses his golfclub to Thing. who DEPOSITS IT in the golfbag.

MORTICIA (yearningly) Oh Gomez. THE CONSERVATORY . the school bus strains to chug down the road. This very evening -. off to school. burning with uncertainty. GOMEZ They grow up so fast.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . don't they? Too fast. MORTICIA Imagine.. gnawed by guilt.LATER THAT MORNING Morticia. Gomez sits at a table.our twenty-fifth seance.11/28/90 13 CONTINUED: Gomez joins Morticia watching THE DEPARTING SCHOOL BUS.. Gleefully hanging from the rear bumper is Pugsley. don't torture yourself.. That's my job. All those years. barely human. if Fester did come back. Don't tease.. Tish. playing CHESS with Thing. THEIR POV MORTICIA 7. CUT TO: GOMEZ A14 B14 . Half-alive. wearing gardening gloves. Darling. MORTICIA The little ones. CUT TO: A14 B14 OMITTED INT. Bless them. GOMEZ (lustfully) Tish. a rotting shell. undone by woe. GOMEZ It's a milestone.. is snipping the blossoms off her roses. 13 Tires smoking.. dragging his heels.

Margaret passes through Gate first. High-strung and superficial.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . As they do. 14 TULLY ALFORD. Then. Gomez and Morticia both look out. CONSERVATORY . Thing moves two chess pieces. Ha! GOMEZ That Tully. Margaret is more disappointed in Tully than he is in himself. Tully fights Gate for his coat. MARGARET. cheating. MORTICIA (impressed) Checkmate. and an embittered grey aura that is the mark of a middle-age misspent. Gate slams on him. approach "GATE. Thing gestures out the window.SAME TIME A15 TULLY Gomez moves a chess piece." Tully has a puffy." a wrought-iron monstrosity that opens of its own accord.SAME TIME 8. and his wife. as Tully passes through. TULLY (to Gate) Gimme that! Stop it! I'm warning you! It's not a good day! CUT TO: A15 INT. CUT TO: . Though Tully comes here often and Margaret has been here before. clipping him and catching the end of his coat. the family attorney. MORTICIA (looking out) Tully is here. Margaret continues stiffly up the walk. Thing moves another piece and gestures in triumph. Let me go! Ignoring Tully.12/3/90 14 EXT. MORTICIA Romping with Gate. JUST OUTSIDE THE ADDAMS' GROUNDS . GOMEZ (moving a piece) Check. once handsome face. darling. they never cease to be startled by "Gate.

B15 (CONTINUED) . 8A.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .SAME TIME Tully! MARGARET Can't you keep up? TULLY I'm trying.12/26/90 B15 EXT.. may I remind you! TULLY If it gives you pleasure. Tully rips his coat to get it away from Gate. GATE ... MARGARET These are your last paying clients..

MARGARET This is all so humiliating. B15 Margaret marches on toward the front door. Finding herself alone with Lurch. for evening. CUT TO: C15 INT. About Screwing up her CUT TO: 15 INT. (before Margaret can reply) Don't say it. I'll get the money. did I marry you? TULLY Because I said yes. skirting the fog machine as if it had every reason to be there. ADDAMS FAMILY PORTRAIT GALLERY .A LITTLE LATER Tully hands his hat to Lurch and marches off toward Gomez's study. ENTRY HALL . Ask-for a loan. I've got a plan. Why 9.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . courage. the charity auction. MARGARET I'm here to see Mrs. Addams. Lurch heads for the stairs.generations of Addams grotesques in elaborate gilt frames heading toward the imposing doors of Gomez's study. TULLY No loans! I'm not a bum. Margaret resolutely follows. (CONTINUED) 15 C15 . splattering his trousers with fog. Like a decent coat . Beg.something dressy. It hisses at Tully as he passes. Margaret is more nervous and intimidated than she would ever admit.A LITTLE LATER Tully stalks glumly along the hall and past the family portraits -. Growling.2/28/91 B15 CONTINUED: MARGARET Something has to.

A PORTRAIT OF THE TEENAGE FESTER ADDAMS draped in black crepe and HOLDING A LIT CANDLE. its blade glinting. It BITES him. interrupting the reverie.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . He flails. Girding himself. Tully proceeds inside. Fester was utterly hairless with a dead white complexion and eyes rimmed in black like a raccoon's... At fifteen. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ It SHUDDERS. preoccupied. The identifying plaque reads "Fester Addams. THE INTRICATELY CARVED DOORS TO GOMEZ'S STUDY creak open. He misses. dancing around. Damn! TULLY 10. clamping its jaws onto his trouser cuff. CUT TO: 16 INT. 16 .?" TULLY regards the portrait intently. GOMEZ'S STUDY . Tully. He leaps into frame. Missed. TULLY'S HAND grabs for the hilt of the sword. He finds himself FACE-TO-FACE with one of the paintings. THE BLADE embeds in the wall with a thunk.11/20/90 15 CONTINUED: ON THE FLOOR lies a BEAR RUG eyes and mouth open. strides toward the rug. sudden FEROCIOUS GROWL as he steps on it. 15 There's a He kicks at the rug. finally managing to shake it off. almost as if having a premonition. 1947 .SAME TIME A SABER slices through the air. brandishing a saber. though how it is holding a lit candle is an utter mystery.

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 16 CONTINUED:

11. 16

Tully BACK-PEDALS and, as he PULLS the sword from the wall, POINTS TO something behind Gomez. What's that?! Gomez turns to see and Tully CHARGES, wielding the sword as if he means to decapitate Gomez. But Gomez easily PARRIES the blow. GOMEZ Dirty pool, old man! I like it! He shreds Tully's TULLY

Gomez counters, driving Tully back. jacket. Had enough? TULLY

They continue to fence. Gomez flips Tully's briefcase open and a sheaf of legal looking papers spills out. GOMEZ Where's my pen? Never mind, I'll use yours. His blade finds the pen in Tully's inside jacket pocket. He does HANDSPRINGS back to his desk, landing gracefully in his chair. GOMEZ First, the old business! He swivels, warding off another blow, then cavalierly continues the duel as he signs the LEGAL DOCUMENTS scattered before him. CUT TO: 17 INT. ADDAMS ATTIC - SAME TIME Morticia, Granny, and Margaret sort through Addams' possessions. In trunks. Boxed. Stacked. Covered with shrouds. Morticia opens a gigantic, elaborately carved armoire. MORTICIA Perhaps it's in here. GRANNY (mischievously) I don't think so... In the front of the armoire is an overstuffed GARMENT BAG LABELLED 'UNCLE NIKNAK'S WINTER CLOTHES.' (CONTINUED) 17

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/6/90 17 CONTINUED: MORTICIA (full of fond memories) Uncle Niknak's winter wardrobe... She carefully passes the garment bag to Granny who chucks it aside.

12. 17

The next garment bag is marked 'UNCLE NIKNAK'S SUMMER CLOTHES.' MORTICIA Uncle Niknak's summer wardrobe... She passes this garment bag to Granny who chucks it aside also. Next in the armoire is a BODY BAG. MORTICIA (fonder still) Uncle Niknak. Morticia continues going through the armoire. CUT TO: 18 INT. GOMEZ'S STUDY - SAME TIME Gomez and Tully are still duelling. hasn't even broken a sweat. GOMEZ I wish you'd drop by more often. Tully doggedly fights on. His jacket has suffered more shredding from Gomez's blade. TULLY I'm like to, but... GOMEZ But what, old sport? TULLY Oh, you know... GOMEZ You know what? TULLY I'm a bleeder. (CONTINUED) Still signing. 18 Gomez

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/20/90 18 CONTINUED:

13. 18

Gomez STOPS DEAD at a document. Deftly, he DISARMS Tully, sending his saber flying up and out of view. GOMEZ What's this? A new proposal? "The Fester Addams Off-Shore Retirement Fund?" What would they do? TULLY What wouldn't they do? It's a very worthy cause and a great addition to the other Fester Addams Funds. GOMEZ (rhapsodizes) Fester - all tribute to thee. called him inhumanly evil. TULLY (protesting) No! GOMEZ Only our parents. I called him brother. TULLY And his memory must live on, forever. Through money. We'll deposit the funds under my name, for tax purposes. Really? GOMEZ That's inspired!

Some

TULLY He would have wanted it that way. Beloved Fester. The sword tumbles back into his hand. duelling. Indeed! GOMEZ For Fester! TULLY A brother! GOMEZ My brother! (CONTINUED) They resume

For Fester!

TULLY Next quarter!? Tully goes to attack like an enraged bull. is new business and we don't discuss new business again until. He lands on a distant date. flipping endless pages.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . It's going to have to wait. 18 With one finger.... TULLY One million dollars.. GOMEZ It's brilliant! TULLY It's untraceable. The perfect (2) 14. Next quarter! Tully has gone white. GOMEZ But.. GOMEZ (cont'd) . TULLY (taken aback) What? But this is different! It's in my name! Make an exception! GOMEZ Old business is old business and new business is new business and this.. he rifles through a desk calendar. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ Next quarter!? . You know the rules better than that. Gomez holds up the proposal.. it's not old business. amount. Tully.11/28/90 18 CONTINUED: TULLY One of a kind! GOMEZ The doctors all said! TULLY Kind to animals! So good with children! GOMEZ They never proved anything..

GOMEZ Fine lunge.a secret panel -revolves and deposits Gomez on the other side of the wall.GREED. closing the office doors behind him. colliding with the chair. DEN . offering a BEJEWELED TREASURE. (CONTINUED) . The entire shelf -. landing on the floor. Tully crawls to the doors and slides them open a crack. on the floor. We see the book's title . Thing. The saber skewers the overstuffed chair.just missing being run through by Tully's saber.11/28/90 18 CONTINUED: (3) 15. Then it turns back to its original position. intent on spying on Gomez. GROANING. Tully lies. He PEEKS INTO: 19 A20 OMITTED INT. GOMEZ Make yourself comfortable. CREAKING. VAGUE ANIMAL HOWLS. Gomez reaches for A BOOK. 18 Gomez does a KUNG FU BACK FLIP out of his chair -. plucks the sword from the air and resheathes it.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez GRABS TULLY'S BRIEFCASE and makes a brisk exit. while I get the money for the monthly expenses. Gomez carelessly flings away his sword. but your riposte a tad rusty. CUT TO: B20 INT. old man. Tully SOMERSAULTS over the desk.SAME TIME B20 The armoire has been totally emptied. Tully gets to his feet. ATTIC . THE SOUNDS OF CHAINS AND PULLEYS. ruined.SAME TIME 19 A20 At one of the floor-to-ceiling bookshelves. goes through the doors. SPLASHING WATER. FROM BEHIND THE BOOKCASE COME THE SOUNDS OF GOMEZ MAKING HIS DESCENT INTO THE VAULT. and staggers for the bookcase. Morticia looks over the contents of a nearby shelf. perched on a decorative Samurai helmet. Thing sits on the shelf. pulling it partway from the shelf. and carried by the momentum of the charge.

inserts her fingers and they're instantly stuck. Morticia.11/28/90 B20 CONTINUED: MORTICIA There it is. (takes the treasure from Thing) Thank you. MARGARET It must be worth a fortune. B20 Morticia passes Margaret the JEWEL-ENCRUSTED CYLINDER OF WEBBED GOLD. MARGARET (struggling) Mmm? MORTICIA The seance . MORTICIA Hush . He won't eat. but greed helps her get over it. 16... what is it? MORTICIA A family heirloom. this is too extravagant! Even for the auction! GRANNY Let's keep it. Won't you come? It's Gomez. (superciliously) Oh. Just what we've been searching for. he can't sleep. Look at those emeralds. Margaret is at first afraid to touch it. MARGARET (awed) My God.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . dragons' heads with gaping jaws at either end. MARGARET (aghast) He coughs up blood? (CONTINUED) She . A finger trap from the court of Emperor Wu. Widows and orphans. We need more of them. Thing.tonight.it's for charity. Margaret isn't listening. he's been coughing up blood. I'm terribly worried. Margaret? Enchanted by the object.

GOMEZ There . DEN . returns it to the shelf. a feather duster in his gigantic hands. CUT TO: C20 INT. Tully reads the title. He manages to close the book and.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez.11/20/90 B20 CONTINUED: (2) 17. A HURRICANE BLAST OF WIND GUSTS from the open book. TULLY'S BRIEFCASE Now filled with greenish DOUBLOONS.. "GONE WITH THE WIND. wearing a green accountant's eyeshade. He grins sheepishly at LURCH Who's been watching him from where he dusts in the hall.. CUT TO: 20 INT. For the new fund.. approximately in the same place where Gomez unlocked the secret panel -but Tully's book comes out of its place on the shelf and nothing happens. A checkbook. B20 MORTICIA (sadly) Well. not like he used to. It's dead weight in his hand -.another hateful ordeal. rippling his facial muscles. (CONTINUED) 20 .LATER C. it's time..the monthly expenses. TULLY (trying to phrase it) I don't suppose you have any paper money in that vault. Tully reaches for a book. Gomez. blowing Tully's hair straight up. then tosses them into Tully's briefcase. Biting back his frustration. GOMEZ'S STUDY . weighs a final handful of coins on an old-fashioned measuring scale. Tully snaps the briefcase shut and hoists it from Gomez's desk. heart pounding.U.SAME TIME C20 At the bookshelf." He opens the cover.

The seance .. For him.. CUT TO: 21 22 thru 26 A27 B27 OMITTED OMITTED 21 22 thru 26 A27 B27 It lands TULLY TULLY OMITTED EXT.11/28/90 20 CONTINUED: Never! them. JUDGE WOMACK'S HOUSE . By the way .I don't trust 18. GOMEZ Eight o'clock. GOMEZ The banks . Really? GOMEZ (his arm around Tully) Not like you and me. Or Fester. (CONTINUED) . Tully. (Judge Womack won't let him inside). searching his pockets for the doubloon. expertly in Tully's vest pocket. Tully resumes his put-upon march to the door. Gomez flips an extra DOUBLOON across the room. Seance? Tully lugs the briefcase toward the door. 20 (confidentially) Strange people.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ I broke another of Judge Womack's windows this morning. helplessly enduring another of the Judge's tongue lashings.A LITTLE LATER Tully is on the front steps.I need you here. Tully turns back.

(annoyed) Miss Bradbury! ABIGAIL (O. day in and day out. (to Margaret) Mother warned you.." Here's your doubloon. And you'll hear Satan laugh. Margaret. "Marry Tully Alford.. Alford." TULLY ".11/12/90 B27 CONTINUED: JUDGE WOMACK (to Tully) Still working for Addams.. Alarmed. (CONTINUED) . she'd always say. I can still hear her voice. Tully steps into D27 INT... His offices were once quite elegant. an arrogant. Mr. Her steely will and conniving manipulativeness are barely veiled by a thin layer of polish and good manners. TULLY'S LAW OFFICE .S.LATER 19. MARGARET (still wearing the fingertrap) I'm stuck! JUDGE WOMACK (to Tully) You lowlife. (to Margaret) Are those emeralds? CUT TO: C27 INT. B27 C27 Tully enters the secretary's alcove. still lugging his impossibly heavy briefcase. TULLY'S OFFICE .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Tully looks around for his secretary. but now the leather on the chairs is starting to crack and a repainting is long overdue. TULLY Miss Bradbury ... aristocratic-seeming 60ish doyenne.) She's at lunch.SAME TIME D27 Sitting in a chair on the client's side of Tully's desk is ABIGAIL CRAVEN. clear as a bell..

special relationship.. Tully blanches. Mother? deadbeat you mentioned? The Before Tully can react... TULLY (choking) Wait a minute. TULLY Mrs. (CONTINUED) . With his barrel chest and his kamikaze demeanor. your call. Mr. Gordon.. in his 40's. I was just about to call you.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Mr. ABIGAIL (to Tully) Gordon and I enjoy a very. but his face falls at the sight of: GORDON CRAVEN Fleshy and round. have have you. Craven. I'm wild about him.. his dark hair plastered with pomade. GORDON (infatuated) She's a pip.... GORDON Mother. D27 Instantly obsequious. Tully sets his heavy briefcase on his desk and shakes her hand. Just hear me out. ABIGAIL I'm certain you were. (she gestures) You haven't met my son. hanging him upside down from the wall like an oil painting. he is IMMEDIATELY THREATENING. Alford? Tully turns amiably. hold on! to listen to me! You have ABIGAIL We do. Alford? And why? TULLY Please. GORDON Is this the one.11/28/90 D27 CONTINUED: 20. Gordon has him by the throat. impeccably if eccentrically dressed.

Gordon! Gordon lets go.. dropping him on his head. Payment due.. Mother. make me proud. I've tried everything.. Gordon.1/15/91 D27 CONTINUED: (2): 21. GORDON She's a saint.. (CONTINUED) GORDON . Still charming? Still spending? Whimpering.. Mr. So do I. no? (after a beat) Down.. Gordon grabs Tully and sweeps him onto his desk. ABIGAIL We've lent you a considerable sum. ABIGAIL (re: Gordon) He's so terribly trusting.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Alford? heard so much about her.I want to believe him. ABIGAIL And how is your wife. ABIGAIL Oh. crawls toward his desk. D27 ABIGAIL Refreshing...& 21A. ABIGAIL (sternly) Gordon. Tully TULLY GORDON I've TULLY I don't have the money to repay you. TULLY Soon. ABIGAIL (to Gordon) Silly boy. Many thousands of dollars.. Gordon .... I promise.

No! TULLY Sweetheart! Don't ask! ABIGAIL TULLY'S CRINGING POV Gordon's face hovers inches from his own.? Gordon makes a face at his mother. GORDON He lied to us. CUT TO: .. croaky whisper) Fester. menacingly. The inspiration is obviously born of terror. Gordon leers down at the battered Tully. Gordon is the SPITTING IMAGE OF THE LONG-LOST FESTER. there's a fortune. comes nose-to-nose with Gordon. Sweetheart. TULLY (babbling hysterically) It's not what you think! Those are doubloons! For the Addams account! Addams? TULLY There's more. D27 TULLY'S BRIEFCASE pops open as it hits the floor. but no one can get to it! Don't you think I've tried? ABIGAIL Have you? Have you tried hard enough? Ask him. Mother.1/15/91 D27 CONTINUED: (3): 22. disbelieving. TULLY. TULLY (in a shocked. SPILL OUT.. The glare from the lightbulb hanging overhead whites out Gordon's hair -making Gordon look as bald as a cue-ball.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . It's like a sudden vision. as he would appear twenty-five years later. They share a malicious smile. The Addams' doubloons Abigail and Gordon light up at the sight of the gold. Gordon descends on Tully.

Abigail stands behind him. Morticia leans out the window.11/28/90 E27 EXT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ (nuzzling her) It's a miserable night. consulting a picture of FESTER that Tully has lent them. his arms around her waist. My little boy.. MORTICIA (festively) Children. darling.. MORTICIA (aroused) I know. highway-style motel room. MOTEL ROOM .. ADDAMS MANSION DEN . MORTICIA And lightning. (CONTINUED) GORDON . facing a cracked mirror. and this hideous creature. CUT TO: 28 29 A30 OMITTED OMITTED INT..SAME TIME 23. Seance weather. with stained fiberglass curtains and a splotchy oil painting. (hurt) Mother. we're starting! (amused) Put down that antenna! Another LIGHTNING FLASH. Gordon is seated on the bed.. ABIGAIL (staring at the picture) It's uncanny.. THE ADDAMS MANSION . E27 27 Gomez stands behind 28 29 A30 A typical.EVENING Morticia stands at the open window. GOMEZ (passionately) Hailstones. rundown.SILHOUETTED AGAINST THE NIGHT SKY RAIN. her. THUNDER AND LIGHTNING! CUT TO: 27 INT.

no more grubby store-front scams. (putting a towel on Gordon's shoulders) Think of it. And later.for now. my angel .A FEW MINUTES LATER Lurch peels off Margaret's and Tully's wet overcoats. and he'll take the rap. ABIGAIL (seductively) Shave and a haircut.. GORDON (intensely) You're so good. So can I. Abigail holds up a shaving brush. (CONTINUED) CUT TO: 30 31 . A30 Gordon moans orgasmically as Abigail begins to shave him. Mister? GORDON (breathing heavily) Two bits.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . covered with foam.I can feel it. ENTRYWAY . Margaret wears the same clothes she wore on her earlier visit -.11/14/90 A30 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (correcting herself) Handsome creation.the finger trap has made it impossible for her to change. 30 31 OMITTED INT. No more loansharking to scum like Tully Alford. GORDON GORDON 24. right in my fingertips. we'll be miles away. All that delicious money .. You locate the vault and then we're gone poof! Before they notice what's missing. ABIGAIL (in his ear) Just one week and out. And Alford? ABIGAIL We need him .

MARGARET Hello. Margaret is amazed. TULLY Get it yourself. MARGARET Give me the car keys.. Thank God. TULLY Big night for you guys! small fry. She tries to straighten her disheveled clothes.1/15/91 31 CONTINUED: MARGARET What a miserable evening. conversation. TULLY Give it a rest. Morticia appears. honored guests... TULLY Don't add to it. Tully reaches out to pat Wednesday's head. She moves away. 25. motions to the tray. Entrails? CUT TO: MORTICIA Morticia . Lurch presents a tray of vile-looking canapes.... MARGARET Call me a cab.. Wednesday has come to escort them. Tully. sweetheart. (holding up her trapped hands) Could you? Wednesday deftly releases the trap from Margaret's fingers.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 31 Tully tries to make Hey. MORTICIA Welcome..

THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Is everyone comfortable? CUT TO: 25A. in this house of yearning.) Let us gather. on this day of heartsick loss.2/7/91 A32 LURCH AT HIS ORGAN He plays a CRASHING CHORD. at this table of woe. A32 . MORTICIA (O.S.

playfully) Pugsley. we offer a clarion call to Fester Addams. the crystal ball in the center. Pugsley has a meat cleaver aimed at his sister. MORTICIA (raising the raven) From generations. to generation. The candle is in its belly and the beams of light glow from its eyes. They do.11/28/90 32 INT. Granny takes a squeamish Margaret's hand..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . (passing the raven to Wednesday) Do you accept the glorious burden? WEDNESDAY (taking the raven) May it weigh me down through all my melancholy years. to Tully) Kids. MORTICIA All close eyes and join hands. In the background. GOMEZ (bemused. 32 The family and Tully and Margaret sit at a round table. O spirits! Harken.. Ow! GRANNY What a grip! (CONTINUED) . Reluctantly. our beacon to the beyond. all souls! Every year on this date. he hands it to Gomez. DEN . Lurch continues to play mood music on the organ. WEDNESDAY (to Pugsley) Stop it! GOMEZ (scolding. MORTICIA Sing.SAME TIME 26. Morticia holds a tarnished gold CANDLEHOLDER in the shape of a RAVEN.

Tonight. 32 Granny pulls away. Still chuckling. Morticia resumes the seance.. Let us be your plague.. Thing lets go and runs off. O Death. Pumpkin. Pugsley laughs appreciatively. stiff as a corpse. Ashen. MORTICIA (affectionately) Mama. Wednesday. to her seat. CUT TO: MORTICIA MORTICIA . My hand! GRANNY She's got my hand! Left holding Thing..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Fester Addams. Granny cackles. Margaret sits. gather your strength and knock three times. Margaret tries to shake Thing off. Excuse me.. Margaret shrieks.you're a handful. Join the fun. Thing ." Mama. but he hangs on tightly.. Margaret shudders.11/14/90 32 CONTINUED: 27. WEDNESDAY (intones) "Let us ransom you from the power of the grave... Tully pulls her back MARGARET TULLY Sit down. you should know better. leaving her "hand" behind. GRANNY I feel that he's near. With a last look around the table to insure that everyone has settled down. Granny takes a hold of Margaret's now-rigid hand with her own real hand.. Margaret tries to escape. her sleeve apparently empty.

CUT TO: 38 INT. TULLY By all means! Tully smirks. Lurch hits a crescendo on the organ. GOMEZ He's at the door! He runs out and through the house to the 38 . GOMEZ (urgently) Ask! 36 Ask! GRANNY Fester Addams .11/14/90 33 and 34 35 OMITTED 28.. He pounds THREE TIMES. THE FRONT DOOR . Gordon's hand again KNOCKS THREE TIMES.SAME TIME 37 Waiting for someone to answer. 33 and 34 35 EXT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Mama.SAME TIME Granny's eyes pop open. DEN . DEN . Lurch's organ music perfectly underscores and punctuates the scene. Quickly.I demand that you knock again! CUT TO: 37 EXT. the heavy hollow sound reverberating.just his hand.. this time even harder. Jubilant. THE FRONT DOOR .SAME TIME We see Gordon's hand on the DOOR KNOCKER . CUT TO: 36 INT. GRANNY Did you hear that?! MORTICIA Ask again. barely able to contain his smug enthusiasm. Gomez springs to his feet.SAME TIME The knocking reverberates through the room.

He seems immobile.A SHORT WHILE LATER Fester stands by the tall. DRAWING ROOM . Pinder-Schloss. Gomez eagerly pulls open the front door.FESTER FROM BEYOND. (CONTINUED) . and his clothing and pallor are pure Fester. dowdy suit. Morticia looks to Gomez for confirmation. Fester endures it. The exact resemblance is shocking. Could it be? Is that him? TULLY (innocently) Is it possible? Oh my God.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . and her hair is in braided coils. Abigail steps forward. Fester! Gomez! Gomez throws open his arms. ENTRYWAY/FRONT STOOP ..11/20/90 39 INT. enveloping him. Fester's eyes have a hard. 39 His family at his heels. a pair of shining black ferret eyes. 40 FESTER GOMEZ Gomez and MARGARET GRANNY MORTICIA INT.. Gomez breaks the stalemate. Fester continue their face-off. 40 ABIGAIL I am Dr. Steam rises off his wet greatcoat. she now wears a plain. Gordon's head is completely shaved. baronial fireplace where an enormous fire burns. Gomez and Fester stare at each other. There on the front steps stands GORDON -. I-dare-you-to-question-me look in them. She now speaks in a German/Austrian accent. calculating. It seems a miracle. Neither man says a word. Gut evenink./EXT.SAME TIME 29. He smothers Fester in an embrace.

beside Fester's steamer trunk. studying the exotic decals. at Human Services. Fester hates being (CONTINUED) TULLY TULLY . my oh my go tell it on ze mountaintop .. Ze vaves. so many tests. He vas found in Miami.. At long last. and I am bringink him. low unt beholdt. Gomez slaps Fester companionably.. Ze sky. and also beautiful. ze Florida Department of Fish unt ze Game. MARGARET But don't you think that's absurd? Honey. 40 Pugsley stands nearby. zay vere valls of doom.. ze say. it vas black like pitch. during ze Hurricane Helga. Ze story .. after who knows vat heartache. I'm tellink you! Zere are tests. tangled in ze tuna net! It vas just last month.1/15/91 40 CONTINUED: 30.zey drag him from ze ocean. Tully nudges her in the ribs to shut up.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . from ze very jaws of oblivion.he is. MARGARET Isn't that the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard? TULLY (through gritted teeth) Blossom. and a complete psychological profile. Can you imagine? Zen . ABIGAIL How did zis happen? How did it come to be. after all zese years..it is most amazink. GOMEZ It certainly is. touched... your bruzzer! Boom! Zey gif him to me. I am bringink him home to you! MARGARET That's preposterous. Margaret. after ze naked unt ze dead.

FESTER Well. back to share . (CONTINUED) .THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. MORTICIA Fester Addams ... for a week. disgusted with Tully. Her fingers are instantly stuck again. demonstrates the fingertrap.. TULLY Darling. I've got a lot of things cooking in the Bermuda Triangle. MORTICIA (dreamy) The Black Hole of Calcutta..11/12/90 40 CONTINUED: (2) 31. Gomez.home at long last.everything! MARGARET Well. at least. The Bermuda Triangle.. but I have to get back. Tully hands Margaret the fingertrap to distract her. I just don't know. 40 GOMEZ And now you're back.well.. TULLY Back to share your joys.. hey . back to share your sorrows. MORTICIA (aglow with romance) Oh. A week? GOMEZ Don't be ridiculous! You're home! MORTICIA FESTER Sorry. how does this work again? MARGARET An infant would understand. GOMEZ (fondly) Devil's Island. Margaret.

Ze human spirit . Not even for a vacation.a hard tink to kill. His fingers are crushed in a rusty. The acid has eaten away the lock on Fester's trunk. then pulls out his hand. no. his arm inside up to the shoulder. ABIGAIL (to Wednesday) Oh. He grins. To be checkink on Fester's adjustment. She is instinctively SUSPICIOUS of this new Fester. Cool. Everyone knows that. you can bet. Pugsley opens the trunk a crack. Wednesday alone stands apart in her mournful fashion. He fishes among the contents. will you be staying too? ABIGAIL No. Something snaps. Zere is zo much you do not understandt.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . WEDNESDAY Nobody gets out of the Bermuda Triangle. (CONTINUED) PUGSLEY . Pinder-Schloss. Pugsley is disintegrating the lock with a beakerful of acid and an eyedropper. 40 GOMEZ (to the group) Excuse us. MORTICIA (to Abigail) Dr.11/20/90 40 CONTINUED: (3) 32. But I vill be back. MORTICIA Second honeymoon. ferocious-looking BEAR TRAP.it is . I really must be goink. At the steamer trunk. my little vun.

you don't have to..you must be exhausted. Let me. BEING HELD BY THEIR FATHER.. (she turns to go) Good night. GOMEZ AND FESTER AS BOYS. MORTICIA A crowbar.. Morticia begins removing Fester's burglary equipment from the trunk.12/29/90 40 CONTINUED: (4) 33. (CONTINUED) Wednesday CUT TO: 41 42 . FESTER (alarmed at what she might find) No. MORTICIA Unpacking . FESTER'S ROOM .. As she speaks. that's all right. Morticia begins to open Fester's trunk and go through it. EACH IN A DOGGY CARRYING CAGE. FATHER STANDS BESIDE A CRUDE WOODEN SIGN WITH "CAMP CUSTER" BRANDED INTO IT.. dynamite. Imprinted below the FACE OF THE BEAUTIFUL GIRL ON THE LEFT is the name FLORA.... PROUDLY SITTING ON THE LAP OF A BOUND-AND-GAGGED SANTA CLAUS.. 41 42 OMITTED INT. Fester examines two photographs in a handtooled leather frame on the bureau... cyanide.LATER Morticia has shown Fester to his room. um. the camera lingers on the following photographs atop the bureau: A PICTURE OF FESTER AND GOMEZ AS YOUNG BOYS. 40 GRANNY (agreeing) Even with a chainsaw. She exits. As if we'd run out. Fester. below the BEAUTIFUL GIRL ON THE RIGHT is FAUNA. continues to stare at Fester.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Abigail pinches Wednesday's cheek.... hard.

He sees . Fester approaches a set of GLASS CASES. ANGLE on the FIRST CASE. but tries to act calm. FESTER It's reserved? For what? For Skipper. CUT TO: A43 INT. He whips back into his room. 42 It's time to go to work. staring at Fester. ANGLE on the second.. FESTER Nosy little brat. In this case there ANGLE on the third. who stands by the empty case. WEDNESDAY -in her doorway across the hallway.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .12/29/90 42 CONTINUED: It's clear that they are identical twins. Fester is startled. 33A. he looks out again -.S. pinned in place. taking in the piles of odd objects and memorabilia. The camera PULLS BACK. This case is about three feet high.A FEW MINUTES LATER The TRAP DOOR RISES in the attic floor. The case contains a set of mounted BUTTERFLIES. appears. STILL LARGER CASE.) It's reserved. ATTIC . are several STUFFED VAMPIRE BATS.. LARGER CASE.Wednesday's door is shut. As he does. the camera PANS around the room. Wednesday stands near the trap door. WEDNESDAY (O. and fairly wide. The CLOCK in the hall STRIKES MIDNIGHT. Frustrated.. It is empty. staring back at him. He opens the door to his room and peeks out. He looks both ways. Fester's head A43 Fester climbs into the attic. (CONTINUED) WEDNESDAY ..

a dog? That 33B.. I'm sorry.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Skipper isn't a dog. (CONTINUED) .. would be cruel. FESTER (gruffly) Of course not. A43 WEDNESDAY No.12/29/90 A43 CONTINUED: For Skipper? FESTER Is he.

A43 B43 He sits on the edge of the bed.12/29/90 A43 CONTINUED: (2) WEDNESDAY He's a bully. which is next to the bed. on the floor. As the room fills with candlelight Fester sees . (CONTINUED) A SINISTER HAND WITH WRIGGLING FESTER . using it to relight the rest of the candles. Fester seizes it and nurses the flame. FESTER'S ROOM . sinking into the mattress so deeply that he's almost buried alive. then he hears the creak of his door opening. FESTER -goes for the knife he keeps in his boot.FESTER'S EYES. There's only the sound of Fester's animal panting.. Wednesday has obviously unnerved him.. Who's there? He sees . getting dreamy. He backs away from her. Getting comfortable. FINGERS. THERE'S A VAGUE FLICKERING FROM ONE OF THE CANDLES.A FEW MINUTES LATER Fester runs back into his room and shuts the door. 34. The door slams. A cloud of dust billows around him.. CUT TO: B43 INT. Who knows what terrors they've seen? But now they lose their coldness. he lies down. A SHADOW -thrown huge on the wall.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . then LIGHTNING ILLUMINATES A HAND GRIPPING THE BEDSPREAD. Fester stares at Wednesday. Veins in his forehead bulge. he burrows deeper. THE WINDOW EXPLODES OPEN -The wet wind snuffs the candelabra light. CLOSEUP .... Yawning.

They gaze together out into the torrential downpour as Fester continues to scream. certain that Gomez is about to attack him. Fester's SCREAM is heard distinctly from down the hall. They both smile. MORTICIA (smiling) He's home. watching him sleep.SAME TIME Gomez and Morticia snuggle in bed in the afterglow of their celebration. Gomez stands in Fester's room. He SCREAMS. FESTER'S ROOM . violently throwing Thing off. 35. listening. Gomez gently lifts him and tucks him into the pocket of his smoking jacket. It can only I've got 43 Fester SCREAMS again. B43 Fester jumps with fear. her head resting dreamily on his shoulder. (CONTINUED) 44 . GOMEZ My own dear brother. pushing against the backboard. GOMEZ Screams in the night. MORTICIA (flirtatiously) I know.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez enjoying a post-coital cigar. goosebumps. MORTICIA AND GOMEZ'S BEDROOM . mean one thing. and pins him to the floor. CUT TO: 44 INT. Thing snoozes on Fester's chest like a kitty cat. Pulling the knife from his boot. Fester leaps from the bed. CUT TO: 43 INT. They wait. jumps Gomez.MORNING Obviously moved. He shakes his leg. he presses the blade against his throat.2/13/91 B43 CONTINUED: THING -sitting on one of his legs. Instantly awake.

then springs to his feet.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ Two out of three? CUT TO: . GOMEZ Damn. 44 Gomez JUDO-FLIPS Fester off his chest. and turns. it's good to have you back! Let's go! He leads the way out. He pauses.11/28/90 44 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (very cheerful) Breakfast? 35A.

WEDNESDAY (gazes levelly at Fester) It doesn't make sense. Morticia smiles approvingly and passes Wednesday the salt. (CONTINUED) . WEDNESDAY May I have the salt? MORTICIA What do we say? WEDNESDAY (dutifully) Now. Lurch assists her. Granny works at a stove that's a coal burning monstrosity. The walls sweat and smoke crawls along the floor. obviously saved for honored guests. A45 The family eats breakfast in the subterranean kitchen. GOMEZ Really? Who knew the Bermuda Triangle could change a man so much? You used to toss and turn all night.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA (to Fester) Sleep well? FESTER Like the dead. Flames belch out of the oven. GRANNY Start with the eyes. Granny flips these offals onto family members' plates.LATER 36. THE ADDAMS KITCHEN . She's given him an elaborate pewter place setting with a dragon motif. Throughout. FESTER (staring at the food on his plate) What is this? MORTICIA Mama's specialite' de la maison.1/15/91 A45 INT. The top is a gigantic grill where innards and various unidentifiable somethings sizzle. Only Pugsley is missing. Morticia has seated Fester between Gomez and herself. We had to chain you to the bedposts.

She studies it. Fester turns his back on Wednesday and addresses Gomez. You'd be surprised at all the things you don't know. FESTER (condescendingly to Wednesday) The Bermuda Triangle is such a large and mysterious place. MORTICIA She certainly would.1/15/91 A45 CONTINUED: 36A.she's hooked.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Remember Camp Custer? GOMEZ (aglow) For pre-teen offenders? (CONTINUED) . WEDNESDAY Ask me anything. Wednesday adores the Bermuda Triangle. Death at sea . A45 Fester had no idea a simple exchange could be so fraught with pitfalls. FESTER Being in my old room sure brings back memories. He already feels cornered.

FESTER Aren't memories precious? I'd like to spend today wandering through the house.) SCREECHING SOUND OF CARS heading for a collision is heard.S.no wandering today. still on its pole. There is a satisfying crunch of metal. Granny.. Just then. 37. GOMEZ No.LATER Gomez and Fester are in front of the bookcase THAT'S THE ENTRANCE TO THE VAULT. shushing everyone. GRANNY Who wants seconds? Something in Granny's soup tureen YELPS. Everyone beams. remembering.. Sorry. DEN . Gomez holds up a finger. the CARS COLLIDE.. CUT TO: B45 45 OMITTED INT. A45 Pugsley runs into the room. GOMEZ Building a fire..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . FESTER (guessing) Hanging our stockings. no. GOMEZ Waiting for Santa to come down the chimney. dragging a freshly-stolen STOP SIGN.. the (O. Finally.. jabs her ladle into the tureen.1/15/91 A45 CONTINUED: FESTER And I was thinking about Christmas. (CONTINUED) B45 45 GRANNY . old man . Don't be shy. Gomez and Fester laugh mischievously. keeping her eyes on Fester. no. Today we're going straight to the vault.

while Fester is wobbly.we're children again. Gomez looks up. Fester reads the title. Fester is right there with him. Fester FESTER CUT TO: 46 A47 OMITTED INT. GOMEZ I feel like .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . "Greed. and he and Fester DROP OUT OF VIEW. THE BOOKCASE SWINGS OPEN.you're it! Gomez pulls the chain. Gomez is all high spirits. through a trap door. leading to the underground river. Gomez is gleeful.11/20/90 45 CONTINUED: 38. THE SECRET CHAMBER . Over his head hang HUNDREDS OF RUSTY As he does so. B47 C47 OMITTED INT. (CONTINUED) . his hand on Gomez's hand as he goes to pull out the old volume. Gomez reaches a SMALL CIRCULAR ROOM. Fester is petrified. CUT TO: 47 INT. 45 Gomez reaches for a book. CHAINS. eagerly follows Gomez inside. he punches 46 A47 Gomez grabs one of the chains.SECONDS LATER Gomez and Fester are SLIDING DOWN A TWISTING SLIDE. Fester on the shoulder. BENEATH THE SECRET CHAMBER .MOMENTS LATER Gomez runs gleefully down a flight of STEPS." They share a smile. GOMEZ Tag . UNDERGROUND RIVER 47 B47 C47 The slide deposits Gomez and Fester on a dock.

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 2/7/91 47 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (inhaling deeply, as if in a meadow) Smell that air, Fester! Fester inhales dutifully. Like a tomb! He gags.

39. 47

GOMEZ Gomez strides to the end of the dock. Waiting there is a VENETIAN GONDOLA, rundown but still magnificent. Gomez does a running leap to board the gondola. He puts on a straw gondolier's hat and calls out to Fester... GOMEZ Tutti a bordo, fratello mio! (gesturing to the water) The sea - your second home. Fester boards the gondola gingerly, looking queasy. Ship ahoy... Gomez winds an old Victrola as he sorts through a pile of 78's. He puts the needle down on a record and begins to sing along in a bellowing basso profundo. He sets sail, poling down the UNDERGROUND RIVER. CUT TO: A48 and 48 A49 OMITTED A48 and 48 A49 FESTER

INT. ATTIC - SAME TIME Wednesday and Pugsley are exploring the attic, investigating various items. PUGSLEY Do you think that's really Uncle Fester? WEDNESDAY Father says so, but I think Mother isn't sure. Wednesday stands in front of an ELECTRIC CHAIR. (CONTINUED)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 1/7/91 A49 CONTINUED: WEDNESDAY Pugsley, sit in the chair. Why? WEDNESDAY So we can play a game. PUGSLEY (climbing into the chair) What game? WEDNESDAY It's called... (she thinks) "Is there a God?" CUT TO: 49 INT. ENTRANCE TO THE VAULT - SAME TIME PUGSLEY

40. A49

49

Still singing, Gomez poles toward A MASSIVE METAL DOOR, SIX FEET ACROSS AND TEN FEET HIGH, set right into the ROCK OF THE GROTTO. Gomez docks at the narrow ledge in front of the door. Gomez leaps onto the ledge and Fester follows. He's getting excited now, wondering what treasures exist behind this door. The vault... Gomez goes to work on the oversized combination lock. (CONTINUED) FESTER

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 49 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (knowingly, to Fester) Two to the right, ten to the left, and then around to...? FESTER (guessing) Five? GOMEZ (surprised) Eleven. Two, ten, eleven. fingers, toes.

41 & 41A. 49

Eyes,

Fester licks his lips in anticipation. GOMEZ So many years... FESTER Long, barren years... GOMEZ Years that we wasted... FESTER Years we'll bring back... GOMEZ We enter together - a triumphant return! FESTER We enter as brothers - we enter... GOMEZ As one! Gomez slowly opens the door, revealing... 50 51 OMITTED INT. VAULT - SAME TIME 50 51

Rather than a treasure trove, it looks like A DECREPIT NINETEENTH CENTURY MEN'S CLUB -- torn red leather chairs and settees, an assortment of TORTURE DEVICES and HUNTING TROPHIES. An elaborate bar with a cracked mirror. Welcome back! FESTER (very disappointed) Thanks. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 51 CONTINUED: GOMEZ Our secret place. Sanctus sanctorum. If these walls could talk, eh, old man? FESTER (looking around, unsure) What... what would they say? GOMEZ (assumes that Fester is joking) You tell me. You go first. GOMEZ (gesturing to Fester, out of respect) Senior partner... FESTER (desperately) Junior spaceman. GOMEZ First a brandy! (indicating the bar) Do the honors. (opening a large wooden box) I've got a real treat in store. FESTER (grumbling to himself, as he chooses a bottle from the bar) Where is it, you ridiculous imbecile... FESTER

42. 51

There are a half-dozen excellent brandies on the wellstocked shelf. Fester pockets a silver jigger, then chooses a bottle AND THE BAR SPINS AROUND with Fester, revealing... THE INTERIOR TREASURE ROOM -A STONE CAVERN stacked high with ADDAMS TREASURE -- gold, jewels, bizarre but priceless statuary from around the world. Fester gets one slack-jawed glimpse and THE BAR SPINS AGAIN, depositing him back in the OUTER ROOM. (CONTINUED)

They smoke cigars and drink brandy from extra-large snifters. PUGSLEY (after a beat) I knew that. WEDNESDAY It has to warm up. and the lights on the chair go on. ATTIC . OUTER TREASURE ROOM . Showtime! And. Why? WEDNESDAY So it can kill you. then who is he? WEDNESDAY Somebody else. He turns -. Wednesday pushes a button. with shaking hands. He and Fester sit in sideby-side armchairs with the stuffing coming out. Fester pours himself a stiff drink and replaces the bottle on the shelf.his arms overflowing with FILM CANS.1/7/91 51 CONTINUED: (2) 43. The entire mechanism hums and vibrates. PUGSLEY But if he's not Uncle Fester. (CONTINUED) .SAME TIME 53 PUGSLEY 52 A53 B53 GOMEZ Gomez is running home movies. 51 Gomez has been too busy digging through the box to have noticed Fester's carousel ride. CUT TO: 52 A53 B53 OMITTED OMITTED INT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .SAME TIME Wednesday is strapping Pugsley's arms and legs into the electric chair. CUT TO: 53 INT.

your first cigar. finally focussing on a head and shoulders shot of Gomez and Fester. The film then JUMP CUTS to: Young Gomez has buried young Fester in the sand at the beach. old man. clearly another person. 53 The young Gomez and Fester. few yards away. Only Fester's head appears from beneath a mound. a single hand struggles out of the sand.. shark fins strapped to their backs. The film JUMP CUTS to: A hand-held 16mm camera weaves its way through a group of ball-goers.1/7/91 53 CONTINUED: ON THE HOME-MOVIE SCREEN -- 43A... GOMEZ Here! The debutante ball! that fateful night? Remember A FESTER (guessing) Of course. Mother insisted. now in their teens. I've smoked since I was five. sneak around a corner toward a swimming pool crowded with kids.. (CONTINUED) . GOMEZ What? Come on.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . The Addams boys look both sinister and dashing in their tuxedos and Gomez is already smoking his trademark cigar.

out of foolish pride. Forgotten. Throughout the twins are seen only from the waist up.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .11/28/90 53 CONTINUED: ON THE SCREEN -- 44. Forgiven. Gomez holds out his arms. Fester gasps for breath. Quite the pair. FESTER (covering his tracks) Flora and Fauna. Yet. dead or alive. But I never meant to drive you off. FESTER (holding up a hand.BEAUTIFUL RED-HEADS with dementia in their eyes. GOMEZ Can you ever forgive me? What? GOMEZ I didn't love them. not to the Bermuda Triangle. you could have any woman you wanted. I was jealous. 53 the boys flank their dates. I admit that now. and then becomes extremely dramatic. insanely jealous. Fester endures the hug. You were so dashing. the TWINS from the pictures on Fester's bureau -. GOMEZ (playfully) Say it! Say the password! (CONTINUED) FESTER . I wooed them. Gomez? Gomez sighs. eh. Gomez turns the hug into a painful headlock. both. very gracious) Water under the bridge.

SAME TIME The electric chair is really humming.1/7/91 53 CONTINUED: (2) 45. GOMEZ You forgot our secret password? The word we used one hundred times a day? Our special private name for each other? FESTER (rubbing his neck. he flings open his arms. demented freak? FESTER Yes.. releases Fester. GOMEZ (joyously) Demented freak! CUT TO: 54 and 55 A56 OMITTED 54 and 55 A56 Gomez INT. ATTIC .... perplexed.. 53 FESTER (choking) The password? I. Gomez. please.. Pugsley now has the chair's helmet on as well.. we were children.. GOMEZ (continuing to choke him) Come on. you almost killed me. you remember. you demented freak.... (CONTINUED) . stop fooling... still gasping) That was a long time ago. Wednesday is about to throw the huge master SWITCH. GOMEZ (shocked) Did you say.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . lights up.. I'm choking. I.. FESTER (turning blue) Please.... you demented freak! Fester has accidentally hit on the password.

MORTICIA (a beat) Oh. MORTICIA Children . as we hear the sound of high voltage sizzling Pugsley.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . you have a last request? PUGSLEY Can I have ice cream? No.what are you doing? Morticia climbs up into the attic.. A56 As Wednesday is about to throw the switch.. her usual impassive self. ANGLE on Wednesday's face.. WEDNESDAY (pleading) Mother. all right.. WEDNESDAY I'm going to electrocute him. then a smile breaks through.1/7/91 A56 CONTINUED: PUGSLEY But why would Dr. She smiles and flips the switch. WEDNESDAY Do 45A.. CUT TO: MORTICIA . Morticia pretends to be stern. PUGSLEY (pleading) Please. Wednesday is very solemn.. Pinder-Schloss tell a lie? WEDNESDAY Because she wants something. Morticia's head appears from the trap door. MORTICIA But we're late for the charity auction. PUGSLEY (sighing) Then just do it. I said no.

on the FINGERTRAP. BAYSHORE WOMEN'S CLUB .U.1/7/91 56 INT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .LATER C. then 45B 56 (CONTINUED) . jewels glittering.

unable to disguise its sleeped-in look. She wears the same disheveled dress. Next to him. standing on the auction block as if she were the item up for auction. modestly. and fifteen emerald chips. JUDGE WOMACK I open the bidding at five thousand dollars. JUDGE WOMACK acts as the event's auctioneer.12/3/90 56 CONTINUED: MARGARET ALFORD. He reads into the mike from the catalogue: JUDGE WOMACK . Margaret looks (CONTINUED) . They look REACTION SHOTS of various people in the crowd. GOMEZ Twenty thousand! MORTICIA For the elderly and the insane -(gazing fondly at Granny) They've earned it. encrusted with rubies. the money we raise goes to help those less fortunate.. who 46. It was donated by Morticia and Gomez Addams. Gomez and Morticia sit with their family. over half our proceeds will benefit the elderly and the mentally disabled. Bah! GOMEZ Not enough! He thrusts up his arm. JUDGE WOMACK is surprised at the bid. staring at the Addams family in horror and disbelief. On the stage beside her. confused. fingers still ensnared in the ancient finger trap. She beams. JUDGE WOMACK Remember. She holds her hands aloft. around..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . This year. All the Addamses look at Granny proudly. 56 blushes.

aimed at Judge Womack.. He smiles greedily.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Granny gives her a stern look. GOMEZ raises his hand. JUDGE WOMACK Twenty-five -MORTICIA bashfully raises her hand. Judge Womack gives her a look that says shut up.. MARGARET pesters the Judge Womack. 56 MARGARET What are they doing? It's theirs. MARGARET (to Judge Womack) What are they doing? Judge Womack shushes her. ANGLE on Pugsley.. (CONTINUED) . (to Gomez) Mon sauvage..2/19/91 56 CONTINUED: (2) 47.. She now has the PEASHOOTER in her mouth. ANGLE on Wednesday.. Wednesday glares at her brother. He has a PEASHOOTER in his mouth. Fester takes Morticia's opera glasses and peers appraisingly at the glittering finger trap. Wednesday sheepishly hands Granny the peashooter. JUDGE WOMACK I have twenty -GOMEZ (interrupts) Twenty-five! (to Morticia) Cara mia. aimed at Judge Womack. MORTICIA Thirty. and holds out her hand. He sheepishly passes her the peashooter.

MORTICIA Your turn. passionately.. He does so.. as Margaret's jaw drops.. Gomez utters a little cry of wild passion. but keeps it extended for Gomez to kiss.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . She lowers it. MARGARET (to Judge Womack) But I don't understand.. JUDGE WOMACK I have fifty thousand dollars.. THE FLABBERGASTED JUDGE WOMACK repeats breathlessly.2/19/91 56 CONTINUED: (3) 47A. mon amour. GOMEZ It's yours. MORTICIA You spoil me.. my ecstacy. Fifty! Morticia has raised her arm. Judge Womack hammers his gavel. amore mio. 56 GOMEZ Thirty-five! (to Morticia) Eres divina! MARGARET is increasingly agitated... (CONTINUED) MORTICIA . MORTICIA raises her hand.

MORTICIA Isn't it too enchanting? Fester pulls his fingers. beside him. CUT TO: A59 . FESTER has his fingers TRAPPED in it. frowns at Fester. in disgust. MORTICIA There's a trick to it. Morticia. admires it also. she has clearly just scored the hit on Judge Womack. 57 58 Gomez shares a look with Wednesday. ADDAMS MANSION . almost as if he were hypnotized. FESTER How do you take it off? Morticia releases it for him. and grabs his neck. Of course. CUT TO: 57 58 OMITTED INT. a projectile HITS HIS NECK. CUT TO: A59 EXT. DUESENBERG . eyebrows knitted.DUSK CLOSEUP ON THE FINGER TRAP -The jewels glinting in the passing lights. He stares at it. He YELPS.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . trying to free them.2/19/91 56 CONTINUED: (4) 48. with the peashooter in her mouth. ANGLE on Granny.NIGHT Several windows are lit. As he does so. then leans forward from his place on the other side of Morticia and. 56 JUDGE WOMACK Sold to Morticia Addams for fifty thousand dollars! Judge Womack shakes his head. She and the children share a conspiratorial smile.

. DUESENBERG . CUT TO: .2/7/91 ALTERNATE SCENE 58. You GOMEZ It's for charity. eyebrows knitted.DUSK CLOSEUP ON THE FINGER TRAP -The jewels glinting in the passing lights. then leans forward from his place on the other side of Morticia and. frowns at Fester.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 58 He stares at it. trying to free them. Of course. 48A. And it belongs in the family. FESTER has his fingers TRAPPED in it. MORTICIA There's a trick to it. bought the fingertrap. Fester pulls his fingers. 58 INT.. you shouldn't have. FESTER How do you take it off? Morticia releases it for him. Gomez shares a look with Wednesday. as if hypnotized. almost MORTICIA Gomez.

with cool professionalism. CUT TO: 60 A61 OMITTED INT. DINING ROOM . CUT TO: 61 INT. then tosses it aside as if touching it burned him.11/20/90 59 INT. (CONTINUED) 61 60 A61 .S. FESTER'S ROOM . then paces back and forth in front of Gomez's transformers. He picks up the nitro. the model trains race toward one another. He stares at the picture. slips his safe-cracking tools into the bandoliers strapped across his chest. The LIONEL TRAIN races through the remains of a strip mined mountain terrace. His emotions churning like the locomotive wheels. Gomez rants to Thing. 59 Gomez's elaborate MODEL TRAIN LAYOUT fills the room.P. He reaches into the drawer for the nitro-glycerine and comes up with the photo of the young Fester and Gomez being brought home from Camp Custer by the U.BEDTIME Preparing to go to the vault. Thing gallops into view around one of the mountains. setting it on a sure collision course with the first. Fester. DINING ROOM .LATER 49.SAME TIME Puffing black smoke. and proceeds with his preparations. GOMEZ (ranting to Thing) 'How do you take it off?' That's absurd! That finger trap was a party favor at his tenth birthday! Gomez demonically starts his SECOND TRAIN. toward the inevitable.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . man.

we see the title . See the fire trucks? From Gomez's train room. sit beside her. 61 GOMEZ He wore that finger trap for two years! Mother had to teach him how to eat with his feet! And the combination. Two books are propped up. she has a family photo album on her lap. CUT TO: 62 INT. KITCHEN . CUT TO: A62 INT. WEDNESDAY Where are they? MORTICIA At a birthday party. when he was little? MORTICIA (also pointing) And that's Uncle Fester. and my cigar . There is a stack of books on the table. and the password.SAME TIME 62 Morticia is seated on the bed.SAME TIME A62 Granny sits at the kitchen table.Gray's Anatomy. Granny looks up from her reading. we see the title The Joy of Cooking.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .and he slept so well! Thing paces furiously. As Granny reads. PUGSLEY (pointing at a picture) Is that Father. Granny reads from the first book. PUGSLEY Father's playing with his trains. and the kitchen table shakes. Yes. followed by another WHISTLE BLAST. The sound of Gomez's trains has begun to RESOUND throughout the house. MORTICIA (worried) Oh. (CONTINUED) . looking at the album. reading cookbooks. She turns to the second book. Wednesday and Pugsley. we hear a voice howl "ALL ABOARD!". a TRAIN WHISTLE pierces the night.1/15/91 61 CONTINUED: 50. no. PUGSLEY'S ROOM . in pajamas.

CUT TO: 63 INT.SAME TIME Lurch is sitting up in his too-small bed. and he pricks his finger. MORTICIA It's always a bad sign -. Fester removes the well-worn copy of "Greed" from the shelf and the secret panel opens. THE COUNTLESS CHAINS-(CONTINUED) A65 64 63 .hobbies. looking troubled. GOMEZ These thoughts! I'm in torment! What is truth? What is fiction? Thing pounds the table in frustration. Lurch's needle slips from the noise. seeing if that will make it turn. wearing his nightshirt and cap. CUT TO: A65 INT. FROM INSIDE ONE OF THE TRAINS -A LITTLE PASSENGER LOOKS OUT. He's headed for the vault.SAME TIME 50A.SAME TIME Fester is at the INTERIOR WALL.SAME TIME The model trains WHISTLE AT FULL BLAST. He pushes against it. 62 A63 Grimly determined. He passes Gomez still raving. heading for each other. He is sewing a button on a shirt -a gentle giant. shrieking in warning as they round Dead Man's Curve.. The CHUG of the trains now SHAKES the entire house. LURCH'S BEDROOM . DINING ROOM ... ADDAMS LIBRARY . CUT TO: A63 INT. CUT TO: 64 INT. Then he remembers.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . He sucks on his finger. He looks above and there hang. THE SECRET CHAMBER .11/20/90 62 CONTINUED: WEDNESDAY He must be upset.. almost to the boiling point.

The CHAIN YANKS BACK. WHISTLING CACOPHONY. Only Morticia sees this. have you brushed your teeth and washed behind your ears? I did. pulling Fester straight upwards. MORTICIA So do I. WEDNESDAY I know what he's worried about. ANOTHER BLAST. darling.. now a CHUGGING. PUGSLEY'S ROOM . Another BLAST. toward a NARROW GAP IN WHAT MAY OR MAY NOT BE A CEILING. B65 . CUT TO: PUGSLEY I'm sorry.. (trying to hide her anxiety) But let's get to bed. With a screech of pulleys and geers.. Now. He randomly yanks one of the chains. WEDNESDAY The covered bridge. pull? 51. hanging on for dear life.. the chain rockets him. WEDNESDAY Is that man really Uncle Fester? Uncle Fester WHOOSHES through the floor-to-cealing piranha tank. PUGSLEY (listening) He's using the diesel. A SHRILL BLAST is heard. MORTICIA (very concerned) Dead Man's Curve. Fester disappears into the gap. A65 Which chain to From far above in the house. Fester hears the distant train whistle.SAME TIME Morticia and the children are listening to the sounds of the trains.11/28/90 A65 CONTINUED: each with a rusted metal grip on the end. CUT TO: B65 INT...THE ADDAMS FAMILY .

SAME TIME The TRAIN CRASH is imminent. 65 66 A67 B67 C67 67 and 68 69 & 70 71 72 OMITTED OMITTED OMITTED . CUT TO: 66 A67 B67 C67 67 and 68 69 & 70 71 72 OMITTED OMITTED OMITTED OMITTED OMITTED 52.give me a sign! Shall I be joyous? Or shall I be damned? The TRAINS COLLIDE! Metal rends.11/20/90 65 INT. & 53. Smoke and flames. GOMEZ (falling to his knees) Spirits above me . DINING ROOM .THE ADDAMS FAMILY .

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 2/15/91 73 EXT. YARD - MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT A COAL CHUTE set in the side of the house DROPS open depositing the soaked, disoriented Fester AT THE FEET OF MORTICIA

54. 73

Silhouetted by the full moon, she stands regally above him, waiting for him, her velvet cloak covering her night clothes. MORTICIA (pointedly) Sleepless night? Walk with me, Fester. She turns and glides away. follow. Fester has no choice but to CUT TO: 74 EXT. BACK OF HOUSE/THE CEMETERY - MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT Morticia leads Fester into the chill of the cemetery. They follow a STONES of the everywhere -in their open path that winds among the ELABORATE TOMBAddams dead. Gomez's golfballs are on the ground, in statues' upturned hands, mouths. 74

As they pass them, Morticia points out various monuments. The marble statues look so real they could be alive. MORTICIA Aunt Laborgia - executed by a firing squad. Cousin Fledge - torn limb from limb by four wild horses. And darling Uncle Eimar... Uncle Eimar is a hooded executioner with an upraised ax. There is an UNEARTHLY MOAN, seeming to come from the tomb. MORTICIA Buried alive. Psychopaths, fiends, mad-dog killers - roots, Fester. Pioneers. Lest we forget. Among the statuary is a MARBLE VULTURE, posed with the dignity of an eagle on a flagpole, but the flagpole is actually a replica of Fester's bald head. (CONTINUED)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 3/18/91 74 CONTINUED: MORTICIA Your beloved Muerto. After you left, he was simply... a different vulture. He wouldn't circle. He wouldn't peck. That's how much you mean to this family.

55. 74

They reach the MAUSOLEUM where MOTHER AND FATHER ADDAMS lie. It stands on a knoll, the HIGHEST POINT IN THE CEMETERY. Poison ivy covers the dilapidated Greco-Roman tomb. Mother and Father Addams have been depicted as a god and a goddess, charioteers driving their steeds to the netherworld. Father Addams smokes the ubiquitous Addams cigar. Morticia gazes up at the likenesses of Mother and Father Addams. But Fester averts his eyes -- the faces seem to be STARING DIRECTLY AT HIM. MORTICIA Mother and Father Addams... Imagine what we owe them. Oh, Fester, how I wish the children could have known them better. But tell that to an angry mob. She turns to trace the FAMILY CREST, carved into the mausoleum. THE TOP OF THE CREST IS A VULTURE. THE BACKGROUND IS COMPOSED OF THREE LION'S HEADS -- IN ONE PANEL, A HUNTSMAN HOLDS OPEN THE LION'S HEAD; IN ANOTHER PANEL, THE LION HAS SWALLOWED HIM UP TO HIS TORSO; IN THE LAST PANEL, THE LION HAS SWALLOWED THE HUNTSMAN COMPLETELY BUT FOR ONE DANGLING FOOT. ON A BANNER AT THE BOTTOM IS THE FAMILY MOTTO IN LATIN. MORTICIA Three lions rampant. The vulture ascendant. And our credo "Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc." "We gladly feast on those who would subdue us." (reflective) Not just pretty words. As an Addams, you understand completely, don't you? She stares levelly at him. FESTER As an Addams, yes, I do. (CONTINUED)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 1/15/91 74 CONTINUED: (2)

56. 74

MORTICIA (after another beat) Good night, Fester. She heads toward the house. She turns.

MORTICIA Rest in peace. CUT TO: 75 INT. HALLWAY - EARLY MORNING Fester is on the phone hunched over, his eyes darting to make sure no one overhears. FESTER (into phone) They're on to me, Mother! I'm almost sure!... Of course, I've tried, I still can't find it... you've got to get over here. Wednesday is bound and gagged on a chair in the background. Pugsley runs up to Fester with two bottles of poison. Fester, vaguely impatient, points to one. Pugsley nods and runs off. FESTER (into phone) ... Don't say that... (tenderly) ... You know that I do... CUT TO: A76 B76 OMITTED INT. ADDAMS KITCHEN - A FEW MINUTES LATER Granny and Lurch are doing the dishes; Granny rinses and Lurch dries. Lurch then hands each dish to Thing, who stacks them. Morticia sits at the kitchen table, sipping a cup of tea. Wednesday stands before Morticia, holding up a large, nasty-looking carving knife. MORTICIA (to Wednesday) Is that for your brother? Wednesday nods. (CONTINUED) A76 B76 75

let's look it up. no.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Mama. MORTICIA (eagerly) What does it say? (CONTINUED) MORTICIA MORTICIA . money troubles.1/15/91 B76 CONTINUED: MORTICIA (taking the knife) I don't think so. even nastierlooking knife. How can I help him? Tell me.suspicion and anxiety. troubled husbands. Wednesday takes the knife and exits. MORTICIA (worried) His trains are everywhere. She starts thumbing through the pages. the children are beside themselves ... adultery.this can't go on. GRANNY Well. GRANNY Troubled husbands. GRANNY (still looking) Financial. MORTICIA Is there an index? GRANNY Here it is . B76 Morticia hands Wednesday a much larger. 56A. in husbands. Oh... GRANNY (still looking) Turned into a toad or reptile. Granny wipes her hands and opens a large. No..... ragged leatherbound book.

they all are. very upset. I can tell. palms and feet with the tears of a stillborn monkey.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . He's suspicious. Add milk. Ease their distress. thank God I came over. Lurch growls in agreement. I can counsel the troubled family. MORTICIA (offended) I can't do that. then disdainfully) Milk. It's barbaric. ABIGAIL Really? Well. What? ABIGAIL (smiling) I'm a doctor. that over-heated FESTER He's no moron! He's Fester's brother. they had some awful fight. Really. It's my calling.SAME TIME 56B. Abigail is calmly inspecting the room. Leave a headless rooster beneath his pillow. Remember. replace it with vinegar overnight. UNCLE FESTER'S BEDROOM .. I'm surprised at you. (a beat.. Smear his forehead. Gordon.1/15/91 B76 CONTINUED: GRANNY (reading) Drain all his blood. FESTER They know I'm a fraud! The whole bunch! It's not going to work! Who knows? moron? ABIGAIL Gomez. years ago. CUT TO: C76 INT. kneading his hands. CUT TO: FESTER . studying various objects with disdain. Mama. B76 C76 Fester is sitting on the bed.

76 (CONTINUED) . 56C.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA (to Gomez) Dr. (to Abigail) Should Gomez speak with Fester? He's right outside the door. ADDAMS DRAWING ROOM . Pinder-Schloss is here to help.1/15/91 76 INT.A FEW MINUTES LATER Gomez and Morticia sit with Abigail.

S. Pugsley runs Wednesday through.11/6/90 76 CONTINUED: GOMEZ I would speak with Fester. 76 Gomez gets up and stalks toward the door. smiling. No! No! FESTER Gimme that sword.. villain. Bloodshed! He hurries back to the 78 TOP OF THE STAIRCASE and looks down into the FRONT HALL where.SAME TIME Fester is marching toward his room. GOMEZ -.. then falls dead. when he hears. She staggers. I will! Fester gets a genuine gleam in his eye.. hack and slice.) O villain. SWORDS DRAWN. (CONTINUED) . 78 FESTER 77 Pugsley hands him the sword.. damned villain! PUGSLEY (O. but that's not! That's an impostor! An impostore! OUTSIDE THE DOOR -Fester hears and STORMS OFF. WEDNESDAY (O. 57. 77 INT.S.) If I must strike you dead. Pugsley and Wednesday thrust and parry.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .S. DUELLING. Wednesday backs Pugsley in. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY . talking louder and louder.if that were Fester.) Who calls me a villain? Breaks my pate across? Plucks off my beard and blows it in my face? WEDNESDAY (O.

CUT TO: 79 INT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . I vill help. 78 79 Gomez is still raving. the sword still to her throat) That's what I said. WEDNESDAY (agreeing..A faker! A phony! An utter fraud! A base. FESTER No excuse. Gomez sits beside Morticia.is zis familiar? GOMEZ (impressed) Tish? No. The jugular.. solemnly) He's only a child. (pointing the sword at Wednesday's throat) Aim for a major artery. Addams. DRAWING ROOM SAME TIME 58.11/28/90 78 CONTINUED: FESTER Haven't you ever slaughtered anyone? WEDNESDAY (referring to Pugsley.. he takes her hand. GOMEZ (excited) Is it unpleasant? Deeply. deceitful-ABIGAIL (interrupting) Mr. They are ABIGAIL I vill (CONTINUED) . explain. Jais? Ze theory of displacement . ABIGAIL Ha! It is too exciting. Morticia shakes her head. both fascinated. I beleef I am understandink.. GOMEZ .

no? GOMEZ But.... was an accident. GOMEZ Displacement! How bizarre. Go! Off viz you! But zen . luff. You luff him. ABIGAIL Ze feelinks in your brain cells. I do? MORTICIA (impressed) Of course. He sulks. you feel guilty .. MORTICIA (egging him on) He's furtive. ABIGAIL It is a very common psychosis. and here. He's sullen..you displace. GOMEZ (excited) He's backstabbing. You suspect tinks. Pugsley? ABIGAIL Guilt.. but you resent him. 79 (CONTINUED) . hate. am seeink it every day. hate..... MORTICIA I It GOMEZ GOMEZ 59. I imagined Fester was the problem.you are feelink ze little black monster. MORTICIA (sincerely) Lucky doctor.you drive him avay.. Jais! Your bruzzer returns.. Luff. I didn't hate my mother. ze bubble and ze collide..11/28/90 79 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL Your very own bruzzer . Like for Mama.THE ADDAMS FAMILY ..

MORTICIA Thank you. 79 GOMEZ I suspect him. CUT TO: . MORTICIA (decisively) But that's love! GOMEZ (jumping to his feet) By God. Pinder-Schloss.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. MORTICIA You're unbalanced.... Dr. GOMEZ And I hate him... ABIGAIL I do vat I can.11/28/90 79 CONTINUED: (2) 59A. you're right! He is Fester! Gomez is suddenly jubilant again.

children? There's a lot to learn. They are all looking at an enormous. I pick things up. ancient BOOK which Fester holds open in his lap. turning another page) Look. C. 80 A81 Fester is seated on a leather couch. WEDNESDAY (still suspicious) In the Bermuda Triangle? FESTER (ignoring her. PUGSLEY AND WEDNESDAY (enthralled) Scabs. PUGSLEY Uncle Fester. Pugsley and Wednesday are snuggled up on either side. how do you know so much? FESTER I've been around. he has clearly just caused the explosion. (CONTINUED) B81 PUGSLEY . boy! FESTER. As the smoke clears ANGLE ON Fester. The title reads WOUNDS. crouched over a detonator.3/18/91 80 A81 OMITTED INT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . AND GOUGES.a new chapter! Oh. CUT TO: B81 OMITTED An EXPLOSION fills the screen. as dirt and debris go flying. on the book's cover. Wednesday and Pugsley stand or crouch beside him.SAME TIME 60.U. (turning the page) Gangrene. SCARS FESTER You see. children . WEDNESDAY'S ROOM .

ANGLE on the window of FESTER'S ROOM. I've been working with them. The children's eyes sparkle. Abigail stands at the window. It's going to be fun! (CONTINUED) 81 . FESTER'S ROOM .A FEW MINUTES LATER ABIGAIL (in her real voice) Everyone will be at the children's play tonight. yes. carports and toolsheds. as if it were Christmas Day. B81 Fester smiles approvingly. It's perfect for small homes. looking out.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . high above Fester and the children. with a nitroglycerin cap. He reaches into a crate and holds up a HAND GRENADE. CUT TO: 81 INT. WEDNESDAY What about picnics? 60A. correct? FESTER Oh.3/18/91 B81 CONTINUED: FEATER Three parts dynamite. She is not pleased.

brooding. (she gives his head a twist and becomes quite fierce) Understood? CUT TO: 82 thru 85 86 OMITTED 82 thru 85 86 FESTER The EXT.. grateful son... the kids.. FESTER But.11/14/90 81 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (livid) Fun? Is that what we're here FUN? 61.. (CONTINUED) .it says." FESTER I do hear it. the vault...THE ADDAMS FAMILY ...EVENING Fester stands alone on the roof. Then she immediately grabs him and ABIGAIL Darling. "Gordon... 81 Fun? for? She SLAPS Fester.. ABIGAIL Soon we'll have the money. You can't go to the play.. Loving mother.. my treasure? My heartbeat? It beats only for you. this is no time for theatre. ROOF . hugs him. my reason to live. I'm sorry! You see what they've driven me to? I've raised a hand to my child. looking out over the cemetery... Gordon. ABIGAIL Can you hear it. I love you. ABIGAIL The house will be deserted! vault will be ours! But.. Abigail hugs Fester's head to her bosom. and we'll be far from here.. Listen closely .

(CONTINUED) . We can't do that again. In the way? GOMEZ A brother? FESTER Gomez. Displacement . FESTER 62. Gomez passes the club to Fester. I'm. Stench and decay. Fester.) There you are! At last! Gomez joins Fester at the railing.life is all fun and games.12/3/90 86 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (O. Gomez holds out his hand.it's a common psychosis. Isn't that grand? Is it? Gomez slaps an arm around him. You're home.you're back! Those years apart. For you . (gesturing to the swamp) A wasteland. Toxic waste. Quicksand. Patches of fog crawl.. It's all ours. But. GOMEZ Precisely . Fumes.. GOMEZ The primeval ooze. The swamp bubbles. Thing supplies Gomez with another club. Pinder-Schloss explained everything. You have a beautiful wife. What a lovely woman .. It is morbid and magnificent in the moonlight. Fester. Unidentified beasties gambol. Thing is there with a golf club.so chilly. You belong here. FESTER You don't know what you're asking. Fester. A dance in a graveyard.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ Look at it. 86 Beaming. in the way. Wonderful kids. old man.S. things change. Gomez gazes down into the cemetery.. GOMEZ What a fool I was to doubt you! Dr. take care.

brooding. as if attending the Academy Awards. Lurch steps out of the car.11/28/90 86 CONTINUED: (2) 63. FESTER'S ROOM . and over the cemetery. OS. Uncle Fester. 86 The two men hit golfballs off the roof. with great ceremony. SCHOOL . CUT TO: .LATER Fester sits on the edge of his bed. PUGSLEY Come on. we hear the sound of a WINDOW BREAKING. In the distance. As the by-standers gape. the Addams family steps out of the car. And the pus. Fore! CUT TO: A87 87 OMITTED INT. Wednesday and Pugsley appear in the doorway. the play.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . FESTER I changed my mind! CUT TO: 88 thru 90 A91 OMITTED 88 thru 90 A91 Come to A87 87 GOMEZ EXT. With the Shakespeare. FESTER I said I was busy! WEDNESDAY But you said you'd help us.NIGHT The Duesenberg pulls up in front of the school building. By-standers eye the strange and wondrous automobile. and opens the rear door. into the darkness.

hanging next to Harmony's essay) MORTICIA (concerned) Have you spoken to her parents? (CONTINUED) .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . B91 The lobby is crowed with the families of students. (she points to a magazine cover of President Bush.NIGHT 63A.2/26/91 B91 INT. SUSAN FIRKINS.SAME TIME B91A MORTICIA SUSAN At his desk now. I'm concerned. Susan is Wednesday's teacher. Mrs. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM LOBBY . MORTICIA Oh. Have you ever heard from your husband? CUT TO: B91A INT. Ms. Furkins Wednesday's told us so much about you. frazzled and a little too eager. she's wholesome.A MINUTE LATER C91 Susan Firkins is showing Morticia a bulletin board hanging on one side of the lobby. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM LOBBY . of course. You see. Wednesday's teacher. CUT TO: C91 INT. a young woman. He appears to be building a bomb. SUSAN Wednesday is an excellent student. FESTER'S ROOM . Fester works with great concentrations. Addams? Yes? SUSAN Could I see you for a moment? I'm Susan Firkins. He hurries. hanging next to a child's essay) Isn't that sweet? And Harmony Feld has picked Diane Sawyer. but frankly. This is our class bulletin board. Susan Ringo has chosen the President. approaches Morticia. (she pints to a photo of Diane Sawyer. As the Addamses enter. This month our theme is "Our Heroes". people we love and admire. He looks at the clock.

. MARGARET (holding her son's shoulders) Isn't he adorable? I made this myself. MORTICIA It's charming. MORTICIA (touched and very proud) Wednesday's Great Aunt Calpurnia. ANGLE on Susan.college first. and enslaved a minister. we've told Wednesday . She was burned as a witch in 1706. But don't worry." (she points to a photo of an oil painting of an evil-looking crone. with her mouth hanging open. They say she danced naked in the town square. yes. What is he -."Calpurnia Addams. TULLY JR. The Alford's son.1/7/91 C91 CONTINUED: SUSAN (not comprehending) But Wednesday brought in this picture . C91 91 Tully and Margaret are chatting with the Addamses. is wearing a felt ELF COSTUME.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .a lizard? (CONTINUED) . CUT TO: 91 INT. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM LOBBY .NIGHT 63B. SUSAN (shocked) Really? MORTICIA Oh.

and he's home alone." GRANNY Toad on a stick! Get your red hot toad on a stick! Can't enjoy the show without your toad on a stick! A92 INT. hawking another of Granny's "delicacies. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM . (she kneels and wipes Tully Jr.11/12/90 91 CONTINUED: MARGARET An elf. Why. 91 TULLY So Gomez. He appears to be building a bomb. MORTICIA Too young. I could just eat you alive! No. Fester works with great concentration. where's Fester this evening? GOMEZ Moody -. We're all out on a jaunt.SAME TIME A92 At his desk now. CUT TO: B92 INT. He hurries. 64. He looks at the clock. Margaret.that's better.'s face with a Kleenex) Look at you .as usual.SAME TIME Gomez attempts to schmooze Judge Womack. um. You are just too precious for words. Granny and Lurch appear. (CONTINUED) B92 . GOMEZ I was hoping you'd come over and play a round of golf. FESTER'S ROOM . JUDGE WOMACK I'd rather rot in hell. TULLY (his eyes gleaming) What a shame. Not to brag but I've got a beautiful little nine hole pitch-and-putt-set up in my cemetery. in that big empty house.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .

FESTER I changed my mind. Morticia and Gomez politely join in while Lurch fidgets and Granny slumps.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . in her chair. peering in windows. ADDAMS HOUSE .11/28/90 B92 CONTINUED: GOMEZ Ahhh. CUT TO: B93 EXT.SAME TIME Sitting at the make-up mirror. 65.. CUT TO: B93 A93 C92 92 . bored. B92 He tucks one of his cigars in Judge Womack's breast pocket and heads off to join his family. banging the knocker) Dammit. CUT TO: A93 INT." They finish to the enthusiastic applause of the AUDITORIUM FULL OF PARENTS. He thrusts a package toward them.. Lurch stops fidgeting and Granny sits up straight.. MORTICIA The children are next. reflected in the mirror. ABIGAIL (whispering. where are you! I should never have used him! She clomps down the porch steps and heads around the side of the house. a previous engagement. Fester is suddenly behind them. Wednesday and Pugsley are putting on their armor. CUT TO: C92 92 OMITTED INT. (very harsh. it's Mother. Gordon.SAME TIME Abigail is hammering on the door with the knocker....LATER A HALF DOZEN ADORABLE SEVEN YEAR OLDS are on stage singing "We Are The World. sweetly) Gordon.. VARIETY SHOW STAGE .. BACKSTAGE .

They wrap firmly There's no one to D93 The vines go taut. AT HER ANKLES -VINES snake out from a window well. my thoughts be bloody or be nothing worth! If I must strike you dead. ADDAMS MANSION. from this time forth. GOMEZ (whispers) I knew you couldn't stay away.2/15/91 C93 INT. 66. a very palpable hit. VARIETY SHOW STAGE. Pugsley SLASHES WEDNESDAY'S JUGULAR. slashing Wednesday's arm. SAME TIME. I will! Pugsley lands the first blow. They both press the attack. AUDITORIUM. SAME TIME. PUGSLEY A hit. WEDNESDAY How all occasions do inform against me. They're happy to see him. CUT TO: 93 INT. hear her and no escape. She makes horrible GURGLING NOISES. drawing blood. In a fatal blow. CUT TO: D93 EXT. and spur my dull revenge! O." As they duel. BLOOD SPURTS in arterial squirts. WEDNESDAY O proud death! What feast is toward in thine eternal cell? (CONTINUED) 93 . C93 Pushing people aside. they act their little Addams' hearts out. She gapes down at them and screams. Virginia tries yet another window. Fester forces his way to where his family is seated. around her ankles. A SHORT WHILE LATER. old man.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Pugsley and Wednesday in their elaborate costumes are drawing to the climax of their scene from "Hamlet. preparing to pull her under. Standing on tiptoes. HER SLEEVE RENDS AND BLOOD SPURTS.

LANDING IN JUDGE WOMACK'S LAP.2/15/91 93 CONTINUED: 66A. 93 In a final vengeful moment. CUTTING IT OFF. (CONTINUED) . SENDING A GUSHER OF BLOOD OUT OF HIS STUMP. THE ARM DROPS TO THE STAGE AND BOUNCES OFF. Wednesday HACKS AT PUGSLEY'S LEFT ARM.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .

accepting their family's applause.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Wednesday falls dead. open your arms. 93 An oil and Pugsley and Wednesday bow deeply.. WEDNESDAY (gurgles) Sweet oblivion. All lost in the triangle. Wednesday. Then. THE AUDIENCE -sits perfectly still.. (CONTINUED) .there were sailors and pirates. jaws agape. applauding wildly. You were terrific. devoted friends.11/28/90 93 CONTINUED: ONSTAGE -Wednesday clutches her bleeding throat. Fester applauds louder than anybody. WEDNESDAY (thrilled) Uncle Fester. and an airplane full of tourists from Miami Beach. CUT TO: 94 and A95 B95 OMITTED 94 and A95 B95 INT. someday will you take me there? FESTER It's a promise. deep in shock. Bravo! THE LIGHTS ON STAGE COME UP -GOMEZ 67.LATER THAT NIGHT Fester is tucking Wednesday into bed.. WEDNESDAY'S BEDROOM . They are now FESTER .. painting. Goodnight. THE ADDAMS FAMILY -leaps as one to their feet.

No one even looked at the corpse. I proposed that very night. bench nearby. MORTICIA Your cousin.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . It was my first funeral. GOMEZ A Shakespearean delight! A Gomez sits on a C95 All hail Fester! MORTICIA It's like a dream. Fester kisses the doll's empty neck. You were still a suspect.. Side by side.. In matching coffins. GOMEZ You were so beautiful . CUT TO: C95 INT. six feet under.someday we'll be buried here. Your moustache. CEMETERY . rotting together. for all eternity.3/18/91 B95 CONTINUED: 67A. A boy. B95 He kisses her on her forehead. Wednesday holds out the doll's severed head. Fester kisses it. Magic in the air. I couldn't stop staring.. all during the eulogy. MORTICIA (gazing at the cemetery) Just think .. MORTICIA What a sublime evening.. years ago. Our lifeless bodies. When we first met. MORTICIA (nostalgically sitting beside Gomez) An open grave. Your laugh. She holds out her headless doll. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ ..pale.SAME TIME Morticia is standing in the moonlight.. GOMEZ (aglow with romance) You bewitched me. Your eyes. and mysterious. it was an evening much like this. Balthazar. A girl. theatrical triumph..

C95 They embrace in the moonlight.2/7/91 C95 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (aroused by all this) Cara mia! MORTICIA (passionately) Mon sauvage! 67B. CUT TO: .THE ADDAMS FAMILY .MORNING LURCH -is sweeping up.tightly wrapped in a plant cocoon. he comes upon 95 ABIGAIL -. Lurch growls. the camera PANS above their heads: we see the headstone featuring UNCLE FESTER. CONSERVATORY . As they do. CUT TO: 95 INT. Among the plants.

PUGSLEY (to Fester) Did you like the blood? FESTER Perfect . teases it with her fork. amused) Rascals. GRANNY Who put this in here? Pugsley and Fester exchange a conspiratorial glance and giggle. peeling off bits of the vines that had encased her. play with your food. at the sideboard. Wednesday has SOMETHING MOVING in her cereal bowl. the table with the family. proud.a full bucket. Mama? Granny pulls a SKELETON OF A SHIN AND FOOT out of one of the serving dishes.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GRANNY (referring to the skeleton) That's for company! GOMEZ (shaking his head. Wednesday. GOMEZ Doctor! You were so right! an evening! MORTICIA Fester fit right in. I was so 68.LATER The cheerful Addams breakfast is underway.1/18/90 A96 INT. Abigail enters. KITCHEN . A96 Fester is at MORTICIA Weren't we all. GOMEZ The displacement is over! (CONTINUED) What MORTICIA She . Granny SCREAMS.

Mother. FRONT WALK . anguish. ABIGAIL Please . And we owe it all to you.. A96 Amazed by the gesture. he does. Tish? MORTICIA (to Fester) We've planned a farewell party.. WEDNESDAY Does he really have to go. breakfast..Greta. MORTICIA (gazing at her family) Bloodshed.. 69. nice. GOMEZ We've invited the whole clan. ABIGAIL Fester . ABIGAIL Jais. (CONTINUED) 96 MORTICIA . FESTER I'm fine. ABIGAIL Vat a luffly gesture.11/14/90 A96 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (glaring at Fester) Vell. Pinder-Schloss..A LITTLE LATER.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Fester looks over at Gomez and Morticia. Greta.. isn't zat. if he insists upon leaving. I'm completely in control. Dr. we shall mark the occasion.. CUT TO: 96 EXT. Fester is escorting Abigail through the yard. GOMEZ Well.valk me out.. We're a family again.

11/28/90 96 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (grabbing him) They're not your family. FESTER I'm fine. They don't love you. Really. Gordon. I can give you that.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . I do. 96 (CONTINUED) . 69A. They're evil and corrupt and degraded. I am.

Together they push them open and STEP into the BALLROOM Moonlight streams in through the floor-to-ceiling windows. They reach Gate. CUT TO: 98 INT.A SHORT TIME LATER ABIGAIL 70. elaborately carved..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Fester is cutting the blooms off Morticia's roses. 96 97 98 Each carrying a lighted candelabra.. oaken double doors. Pugsley. ABIGAIL (bellowing) Open up. overwhelmed by the grandeur. Granny. The furniture and banquet tables are FUNEREALLY SHROUDED... The black marble floor glistens. and Wednesday stand in front of the tall.. the shrouds undulate in the breeze admitted through the open doors.. for me. As Gomez and Morticia waltz past. Gomez steps up to Morticia and embraces her. (CONTINUED) . FESTER A party. It's straight out of a ROCOCO palace. MORTICIA'S CONSERVATORY .EVENING. then follows Morticia.. HALLWAY OUTSIDE BALLROOM . Lurch. to dance. MORTICIA We're opening the ballroom now. Morticia. A lofty unsupported dome ceiling is DECORATED with figures worthy of Dante. Like some primeval sea. Gomez unlatches them. Gomez. CUT TO: 97 INT. Fester hesitates.2/13/91 96 CONTINUED: We'll see.. here. They begin Fester remains frozen in the center of the ballroom. revealing the true enormity of the ballroom. Fester. Even Gate is intimidated and swings open.

COUSIN OPHELIA ADDAMS who looks like a Tennessee Williams heroine who's just been fished out of the Mississippi.how long has it been since we've waltzed? MORTICIA (ruefully) Oh.I wonder-. A SMALL ORCHESTRA plays a FRACTURED WALTZ. Thing is a 99 Gomez and Morticia dance among the ADDAMS FAMILY RELATIVES -. DEXTER AND DONALD (they echo one another) I wonder-. a teenage hunchback in a loud blazer.. she reaches for one of the shrouds and WHIPS IT OFF -. hours. With him is his child-sized wife. COUSIN LUMPY ADDAMS. 98 He dips Morticia. BLACK. SLOSH ADDAMS.IT FILLS THE SCREEN.to Fester. THE BALLROOM.. MORTICIA 71. If a man could look like a toad and still be a man. LOIS. Gomez. and Gomez in black velvet lounging pajamas.what happened-.11/20/90 98 CONTINUED: All for you! GOMEZ Tish . this is he. He's made many a killing on Wall Street. all four arms embrace his date. As she bends back. third hand on the bass.what happened-. Dexter and Donald dance Ophelia over to Gomez and Morticia. resplendent now in their party clothes.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .that portrait gallery of GROTESQUES come to life. When the shroud comes down THE PARTY IS IN FULL SWING. an over-age Heidi. CUT TO: 99 INT. with thick blonde braids. Gomez and Morticia. the two-headed cousin in matching turtlenecks. Among them are: DEXTER AND DONALD ADDAMS. DIGIT ADDAMS. (CONTINUED) . Morticia in a formal version of her black sheath.to Fester-. smoking jacket and fez.

Ophelia. with a spacy Thorazine smile. 99 A100 Fester is in his robe. FESTER What would look best? A tuxedo? ABIGAIL A nice dark suit is perfectly acceptable. or his underwear. Soon. Ophelia addresses Morticia.but the party's for me! (he holds an outfit up in front of the mirror) I love this. he is considering various pieces of clothing. OPHELIA Where is Fester? MORTICIA Soon.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . I know . Abigail stands nearby. her arms folded.4/03/91 99 CONTINUED: GOMEZ Still primping.you're not really an Addams. Where am I? CUT TO: A100 INT. I suppose. CUT TO: . on hangers or placed on the bed. may I remind you . FESTER'S BEDROOM OPHELIA 72. FESTER I know. FESTER But the whole family's coming! I want to look terrific! ABIGAIL Gordon. Her mind water-logged and bleary.

Cousin It is a hairball in a homburg. BALLROOM . It. He SEES-MARGARET on the dance floor with Tully. He parks the car and flips open the top. Morticia come over to greet him. MORTICIA Far too long. COUSIN IT Ooot gibber bleep. He pauses for a moment. CUT TO: 101 INT. who gleeps and squeaks in a language the Addams have no trouble understanding. to survey the house. ooot. ooot. slicking it back. ADDAMS MANSION 72A.4/03/91 100 EXT. 100 The front door opens. driving up in his bubble-topped Itmobile.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . old man! COUSIN IT Bleep gibber. then excuses himself. obviously checking out the women. ANGLE on COUSIN IT. he has obviously been summoned. and Lurch appears. It runs a hand through his hair. GOMEZ Gomez and 101 Cousin It looks around. He looks out. You're right. (CONTINUED) . his face lights up as he sees a new arrival.A LITTLE LATER Lurch escorts COUSIN IT into the ballroom.

SAME TIME Wednesday is dancing with Lumpy Addams. Mother? (CONTINUED) WEDNESDAY MORTICIA C102 . There's a TAP on Margaret's shoulder. CUT TO: A102 B102 OMITTED INT. He takes her in his arms and spins away with her. then slip away from the party . Morticia approaches them.11/17/90 101 CONTINUED: MARGARET 73. hat in hand. MARGARET Don't let me out of your sight. Wednesday? Yes.. How? FESTER I'm the guest of honor. ABIGAIL You'll make your appearance. She turns. and you take me here. FESTER'S BATHROOM . Abigail shaves the back of Fester's head with a straight razor.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .SAME TIME A102 B102 Before The pipes groan loudly as scalding water floods the sink... CUT TO: C102 INT.. ooot... BALLROOM .. 101 clings stiffly to Tully in the midst of all this Addams' weirdness.. MARGARET The first time we've been dancing in ages. TULLY Don't threaten me. the teenage hunchback. her is Cousin It.. eager to cut in. The room is filled with steam.. TULLY It's a formal occasion. ooot. COUSIN IT Oot.

. fine. I will try and reach the vault tonight.1/7/91 C102 CONTINUED: MORTICIA Could you run upstairs and check on your uncle? (as Wednesday runs off) Thank you. are people everywhere. FESTER Yes.. Mother. FESTER All right. There ABIGAIL You can do it. (to Lumpy) Why. you. if you just stop whining. dear. Gordon. well.. FESTER It's not going to be easy. FESTER'S ROOM . it's unattractive. I'm counting on you. Mother? (CONTINUED) . I hear ABIGAIL I hope so. But if I can't. C102 102 She hears the water running in Fester's bathroom. Uncle Fester? WEDNESDAY 74. Okay. CUT TO: 102 INT. Don't buckle. I understand. then there's silence..A MINUTE LATER The door opens and Wednesday peeks inside. The pipes make a final clang. Lumpy Addams. (screwing up his courage) Then that's it. the sound of voices beneath it.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . INSIDE THE BATHROOM -Fester turns off the water. No one likes that. Look at you. All grown up.

The straight razor catches the light and GLINTS MENACINGLY.1/7/91 102 CONTINUED: Wednesday stands frozen in the doorway. Wednesday! FESTER Abigail's facade disintegrates and she bellows. torn and it shows. Ve von't He is genuinely Fester can't believe this is happening. hurt you. little vun. 102 Abigail and Fester wheel around on her. WEDNESDAY You are a fake! I knew it! 74A.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . ABIGAIL Come here. Get her! (CONTINUED) ABIGAIL .

I cannot see! GOMEZ I'm blinded by beauty! (CONTINUED) 104 105 106 C104 .SAME TIME Wednesday throws open a TRAPDOOR IN THE FLOOR and DISAPPEARS DOWN IT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 104 105 106 OMITTED OMITTED INT. and into the darkness of the night. shielding his eyes. C104 EXT. HALL . She runs through FESTER'S ROOM and ACROSS 103 INT. in fact. BALLROOM .S. 75.12/29/90 102 CONTINUED: Abigail pushes him toward Wednesday -. GRAVEYARD . Fester tries to find it but.NIGHT Wednesday runs through the graveyard. 102 103 She slams her bedroom door behind her. pulling the door closed behind her. into the ballroom. She takes off toward the cemetery. Twenty-five years later.SAME TIME into her own room. WEDNESDAY'S ROOM . Fester KICKS the door open just in time to SEE: A104 INT. CUT TO: EXT.SAME TIME A104 B104 B104 Next to the coal chute where Abigail was grabbed by the vines.) Flora and Fauna Amor! Gomez approaches. Galvanized into action by the hold his mother still has on him. the twins from the home movies.SAME TIME Lurch escorts FLORA AND FAUNA AMOR. He takes their wraps revealing that they are. GOMEZ (O.one marked Pugsley and one marked Wednesday.who suddenly scared. takes off running. ARE TWO SMALLER CHUTES -. the door is seamless. HOUSE . a pair of SIAMESE TWINS. they still look quite beautiful and quite mad. Wednesday SLIDES OUT of her chute. He pounds the floor in frustration.

... FAUNA . this darling man.... how can I compete? You're twice the woman I am...... They're waiting for Fester. FAUNA I saw him first. he was mine. FLORA . he was mine. Tully... ... you nabbed him.. Copycat! Tag-along! Morticia appears.... FAUNA ... Morticia! FLORA I hate you! I've FAUNA FLORA 76.11/20/90 106 CONTINUED: FLORA Gomez Addams. the Amor twins. always was. FLORA . who is striding by in search of Margaret. FLORA (flirting) Hello. 106 FAUNA . Fauna.. heard so much about you.. you terrible flirt. Amuse them..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez grabs Tully.. at least with me.. Gomez. GOMEZ Tully... MORTICIA Flora.. MORTICIA Why.. The Amor twins.. FAUNA .

Let's just leave .or they'll suspect something.. FESTER I couldn't find her anywhere. Now get to the party . ABIGAIL Pull yourself together. (using her accent) Ja? CUT TO: A108 OMITTED A108 A107 107 TULLY .12/26/90 106 CONTINUED: (2) 77..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . leading him onto the dance floor.out the back. CUT TO: A107 107 OMITTED INT.. Oh my God.. She'll turn up . Fester comes climbing back through the open window. FAUNA (to Tully) She's nothing.. I'll be down soon. MORTICIA (calling after them) Bon chance! The girls now have their four arms all over Tully. At that moment.. 106 FLORA (to Tully) Ignore her.SAME TIME Abigail is in the room alone.the little cockroach. FESTER'S BEDROOM .

Lurch then lifts the tray onto a serving cart. Granny turns the roast pig slightly to arrange the garnish and reveals its SECOND HEAD.. chatter giddily as he tries to maneuver them through a box-step.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA Mama.11/17/90 B108 INT. now on the dance floor with Tully. It's obvious that Fester and Gomez are devoted. TULLY Why wouldn't they be devoted? FAUNA Well.SAME TIME 78/79. CUT TO: C108 INT. you've outdone yourself. KITCHEN . FLORA (rolls her eyes heavenward) Fauna. Satisfied. TULLY Especially considering what? FLORA It makes no difference now. GRANNY Hey . he's the king of the castle again. FLORA You can't imagine how surprised we were when Gomez called and told us Fester was back.. and rolls the cart out. FAUNA Especially considering.SAME TIME Flora and Fauna. now that Fester's back.... This one too has an apple in its mouth. she covers it with a lid. It is beautifully glazed. isn't he? (CONTINUED) C108 .. deliciously plump and has an apple in its mouth. B108 Morticia watches as Granny garnishes a ROAST PIG set on silver tray. BALLROOM .it's a party.

The house. Alford? Why. Tully hurries off. Excuse me.. ladies? FLORA FAUNA TULLY 80... grinning like the cat who swallowed the canary.you name it. the money . CUT TO: D108 E108 OMITTED OMITTED CUT TO: D108 E108 . FLORA Gomez be damned. they giggle madly.. isn't he? FLORA (flirting) Are you. Fauna. Mr. C108 Tully winks at Flora and blows a kiss to Fauna. FAUNA Fester's still single. FAUNA I'd like to.2/28/91 C108 CONTINUED: FLORA Fester's the older brother.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . So he gets it all. I'm Fauna! I'm Flora! TULLY I'm flattered.

Everyone. and the guests fall silent. Our treasured guest of honor -Fester Addams.SAME TIME Morticia and Fester have appeared at the door to the ballroom. 108 The music stops. Now he is found. our family grieved.2/7/91 108 INT. MORTICIA When he was lost. (CONTINUED) . 80A. BALLROOM . and our celebration begins. And how it became them. MORTICIA Your attention please.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .

(CONTINUED) GOMEZ . The Mamushka! Gomez begins to CIRCLE around Fester. Gomez admires his brother. NOSE-TO-NOSE WITH GOMEZ. They begin JUGGLING THEM BACK AND FORTH -.. high into the air.. Gomez has changed clothes -. GOMEZ Taught to us by our Cossack cousins. Gomez hurls the scimitars to Fester. the Mamushka has been an Addams family tradition since God-knows-when.. Gomez then throws the scimitars straight up.MUCH TO FESTER'S SHOCK AND SURPRISE. Fester stands in the center. They launch into a TONGUE-TWISTING PATTER SONG. CIRCLING COUNTERCLOCKWISE to Gomez. Fester Addams. Baffled. petrified. It's an ELABORATE. sending him whirling like a top into the CENTER OF THE DANCE FLOOR where he suddenly STOPS. Morticia.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . manages to somehow bungle his way through. Fester stumbles his way through.11/6/90 108 CONTINUED: 81. Granny. Fester. CAREFULLY CHOREOGRAPHED ROUTINE. GOMEZ . The MOVES GET MORE AND MORE INTRICATE. this Mamushka's for you! The juggling continues. and all the Addams women rap out a stirring martial beat on tambourines. and now. and begins juggling them.We danced the Mamushka while Nero fiddled! We danced the Mamushka at Waterloo! We danced the Mamushka for Jack the Ripper. the eye of this dizzying hurricane.but instead ABRUPTLY SPINS HIM BY THE ARM. The other family members form a ring. He carries FIVE GLEAMING SCIMITARS.. 108 She takes him by the hand as if to lead him toward the assembled guests .he's dressed now like a Hollywood Cossack. During an instrumental passage of the song.

108 GOMEZ After all this time Fester hasn't forgotten a step. What's he going to do with THE FIFTH SCIMITAR? HE OPENS HIS MOUTH TO SCREAM. SWALLOWS IT TO THE HILT. IT DROPS STRAIGHT IN. his hands are full.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . he CATCHES. A REMOTE CORNER OF THE BALLROOM . TWO. They close in on Fester. not a word. Amazed. coming straight at him. FOUR -. Fester burps.. ONE. hasn't forgotten a word! Fester STOPS DEAD. The Addams CUT TO: A109 INT.with two in each hand... FESTER How did I do that? Gomez slaps him on the back. cheer again. COUSIN IT Ooot oot blipper.. Panicking. MARGARET We've been married for almost twenty years. FESTER (astonished) Not a step. Fester has missed a beat and looks up to SEE -ALL FIVE SCIMITARS -DROPPING FAST.. Fester drops the scimitars he holds and pulls the one from his mouth.SAME TIME Cousin It and Margaret are waltzing in an out-of-the-way nook.. they are somewhat involved.. HE The Addams mob CHEERS LUSTILY and launches into the finale of the song. THREE..11/6/90 108 CONTINUED: (2) 82. (CONTINUED) A109 . sometimes it seems like more.

The raucous sounds of the Mamushka reverberate from the Addams mansion. Upstairs.. on the dance floor. Ten minutes . people change. JUDGE WOMACK (smiling) What can I do for you? CUT TO: 110 . He's apoplectic. leading a trembling Margaret.A SHORT WHILE LATER Judge Womack is on the front porch with Tully. COUSIN IT Glibber gleep gleep. FRONT HALL .. In the rear of the hall. stops him.I'll be back.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . frustrated. TULLY Hey . Tully slips out the door. people grow..not to worry. A109 109 Abigail ABIGAIL But that hideous little girl.12/26/90 A109 CONTINUED: MARGARET Of course. 83. a reprise of the Mamushka has begun. CUT TO: 109 INT.. Abigail turns. JUDGE WOMACK What the hell's going on over there? TULLY How would you like to be rid of the Addamses for good? I'm serious. ABIGAIL Where are you going? There's trouble. TULLY (interrupts) I'm in charge. Cousin It passes across.A LITTLE LATER. Plan B. CUT TO: 110 EXT. throwing up her hands. JUDGE WOMACK'S HOME . in his coat. Tully is heading for the front door.

won't you.. Margaret. covering him with lipstick. Flora and Fauna giving good-bye kisses to Fester. (a beat) Call me? The limo drives off. It drives off. An AMBULANCE pulls up. Gomez and Morticia stand on the front steps waving good-bye to their departing guests. 111 Cousin It leans out the window of his limousine. confidentially) I'll call. 84. MARGARET (torn) I can't. they hang on him with all four arms. The limo passes -Morticia appears.. MARGARET You're a marvelous dancer. He's It.3/18/91 111 EXT. He is enjoying himself.TWO O'CLOCK A. White-jacketed ATTENDANTS step out.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . been such fun. isn't he? MARGARET (sighing) He's perfect.M. FLORA You'll come see me before you leave. with a straight-jacket built for two. FESTER There's your ride! Good-bye. She puts her arm around Margaret as It's MORTICIA Oh. girls! CUT TO: MORTICIA . as Margaret waves a fond farewell. he's very special. once I'm alone. ADDAMS MANSION . COUSIN IT Ooot ooot gibber. Fester? FAUNA (to Fester. sharing a romantic last moment with Margaret. We musn't.

A BIT LATER A84A. He opens the door and strides into -113 INT. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY . FESTER'S ROOM . 112 Fester skips down the hall.3/18/91 112 INT. the Amor Twins' kisses still fresh on his cheeks. He grabs Abigail and starts dancing with her. swinging her around and singing bits of the patter song. still practicing bits of the Mamushka. (CONTINUED) .SAME TIME 113 Fester dances into the room.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .

.I sang up a storm! And I danced 'till I dropped! The Mamushka! He begins to dance again. Date. return to your depraved orgy. sits on the bed.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Sing. ABIGAIL I'm perfectly fine. Dance. breathing fire. Mother.. Gordon.2/13/91 113 CONTINUED: Gordon? Fester keeps singing and dancing. Mother? ABIGAIL Mother? Mother? Who is that? don't think I recall. Sometimes I think you're not even my son. Please. I don't understand this.. by all means .. Please.. I'm dandy. Don't concern yourself with me. turning away from him..go. You only owe me your entire existence on this planet. Abigail. I have! It was marvelous . is that. (CONTINUED) FESTER I FESTER . have you been having a good time? FESTER (jubilant) Yes. 113 Fester lets her go. Let me get this clear. Have you. FESTER Don't say that! ABIGAIL I'm just your mother. Gordon! ABIGAIL Stop it! This instant! ABIGAIL 84A. lipstick? your face? All over FESTER (still giddy) From the twins! The beauteous Amor twins! ABIGAIL The twins? Gordon. ABIGAIL Gordon. Gordon.

. Gomez enters... she points to the MORTICIA (whispering) Look . I love you.. like a little entree.they're not you. Gordon. I'm so terribly sorry. platter. PUGSLEY (sleepy) Where. that hunchback. MORTICIA (whispering) So sweet. It means nothing.. (he kneels at her side) It was just a party.our little boy.11/12/90 113 CONTINUED: (2) 85.. Pugsley wakes up. ABIGAIL (very no-nonsense) We've got to find Tully..THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. GOMEZ (whispering) All tuckered out. It's over. He looks just. 113 FESTER (coming to his senses) Mother. She finds this enchanting. Cousin It . where's the party? (CONTINUED) . he looks around. She discovers Pugsley ASLEEP. BALLROOM . Morticia shushes him. Make me believe it. FESTER And I want money. I'm. CUT TO: 114 INT. ABIGAIL (clutching him savagely) Say it. Those Siamese twins. curled up on the SILVER PLATTER WHERE THE TWO-HEADED PIG LAY.SAME TIME 114 Morticia is looking for her children.

GOMEZ Fester! You take the ravine! the unmarked. awaiting instructions. Granny has grabbed her divining rod. GOMEZ Fan out. Good man! GOMEZ Good thinking! (CONTINUED) . MORTICIA (worried) Her favorite. ADDAMS YARD . 114 115 Gomez rallies the family for the search.head for the dung heap. Lurch distributes torches.have you seen your sister? PUGSLEY Not since before the Mamushka. then stands aside. Morticia wears a black cloak.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . looking down at them from Wednesday's window. GOMEZ (calls out) Fester!! Up here. They look up at Fester. Pugsley helps Gomez unroll an ancient map of the area.the shallow graves.. Gomez? GOMEZ Don't fret .. and Lurch . CUT TO: 115 EXT. darling .) FESTER Somebody should stay behind . abandoned well! And FESTER (O.check the bottomless pit. Mama and Morticia .LATER MORTICIA 86.we'll find her.S. Pugsley . I'll take the abyss.in case she comes back.11/12/90 114 CONTINUED: MORTICIA It's over.

. with Gomez in the lead. Tully closes the book and smugly unfurls a LEGAL DOCUMENT. TULLY sitting in an armchair. CUT TO: 117 118 OMITTED INT. 116 INT.. 117 118 Abigail joins him. ABIGAIL Where the hell is Tully? They head out. basking in the rays of sunshine that beam from a copy of "The Sun Also Rises. GOMEZ That's the spirit. TULLY Taking a little sun. 87. CUT TO: TULLY .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Thing . WEDNESDAY'S ROOM . THEIR POV Spread far and wide over the grounds." Tully smiles at them. 115 Gomez nods. ABIGAIL What are you doing? Relaxing.A LITTLE LATER Fester and Virginia find. tiny lights aloft.lend a hand! Let's go! They all sweep off. DEN .A SHORT WHILE LATER Fester is still at the window. 116 ABIGAIL Have you gone mad? Au contraire. the various members of the family search for Wednesday. calling.12/3/90 115 CONTINUED: GRANNY Then who'll take the swamp? Thing tugs at the cuff of Gomez's pants.

He steps into A124 INT.MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 88. CUT TO: A124 . Granny's torch casts scary shadows on the cave walls. SWAMP . Gomez approaches quietly. stopping occasionally to quest the air for his mistress.MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 120 Torch aloft. MAUSOLEUM .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Stalagmites.MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT Lurch picks up a car -. CEMETERY .2/19/91 119 EXT. Relieved to find her. Stalactites.MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT Morticia and Granny stand in the middle of the dripping dankness. CUT TO: 120 EXT.SAME TIME Inside it is catacomb-like. CUT TO: 122 EXT.DARK 123 122 121 Gomez reaches a stately mausoleum at the far end of the cemetery. curled asleep on a stone sarcophagus.one of which belongs to Wednesday. Pugsley searches through the primeval forest. Gomez lowers the uplifted claw of one of the vultures and the stone doors slide open. Mama. PRIMEVAL FOREST ADJACENT TO CEMETERY . CUT TO: 121 EXT. 119 Thing hops lily pads. NEIGHBORHOOD . filled with the bleached bones of the Addams dead. I was sure we'd find her here. Gomez's torch casts shadows -. GRANNY (calling out) Wednesday! Wednesday! MORTICIA Oh. Two proud marble vultures guard the entryway. UNDERGROUND GROTTO . CUT TO: 123 EXT. He doesn't want to wake her up.looking for Wednesday. He lifts her tenderly in his arms.

THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ A restraining order? TULLY It requires you to keep a distance of one thousand yards from this house. appalled at the sight of Gate.Fester Addams! GOMEZ But . (to Gomez) You're bitter rivals. You've got about nine hundred and ninety-nine yards to go . GATE .from my own house!? TULLY Not your house. the older of the brothers -.catch my drift? GOMEZ (in disbelief) I am restrained .this is lunacy! MORTICIA Fester adores Gomez! TULLY He's afraid of him.always were. Gomez . He rattles miserably on his hinges -locked tight with heavy chains and yellow police tape large "NO TRESPASSING!! COURT ORDER!! ADDAMS FAMILY KEEP OUT!!" signs are posted on Gate's rusty bars. Gomez. moustache! Not any more! It belongs to the eldest living descendant. Seeing the twins brought it all back.2/15/91 124 EXT. waving his legal document. GOMEZ What's all this? TULLY -hurries down the walkway.DARKNESS BEFORE DAWN 89. TULLY This is a restraining order. PULL BACK TO REVEAL -the family. the sleeping Wednesday and Pugsley. 124 Gate can't open. always will be! (CONTINUED) Lurch carries .

Leave it alone.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 89A. He's very hurt it's not a good time.just leave.2/15/91 124 CONTINUED: GOMEZ It's not so! Those girls meant nothing . Or better yet . 124 (CONTINUED) .he knows that! I demand to see Fester! TULLY Sorry .no can do.

GAVEL -hammers on the Judge's bench. with God as my witness I am that fool! CUT TO: 125 A126 126 OMITTED OMITTED INT. COURTROOM .DAY C. WEDNESDAY But he isn't even Uncle Fester. rubbing the sleep from her eyes.U. GOMEZ (to his family) Do not fear . The courts will decide! (fervently) They say a man who represents himself has a fool for a client.justic shall prevail. reads his decision.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Well. then (CONTINUED) 125 A126 126 . Gomez and Morticia turn to look at her.2/22/91 124 CONTINUED: 90. PULL BACK to reveal -JUDGE WOMACK is the presiding judge. He hammers the bench again. 124 Wednesday comes forward.

. CUT TO: 127 EXT.. ADDAMS MANSION . Gomez Addams. her carnivorous plant.2/26/91 126 CONTINUED: JUDGE WOMACK Given applicable standards of proof.DAY The family members TROOP to the car with their few possessions.LATER The Duesenberg eases out of the driveway and onto the street. Lurch uproots his favorite tree and joins the procession. watches the car drive off. FESTER standing at a second story window. his head thrown back. 126 127 already sits in the passenger seat of the Duesenberg. CUT TO: 128 129 . (He holds up a golf ball) I believe this is yours. WEIGHED DOWN by Lurch's tree. CUT TO: 128 129 OMITTED EXT. ADDAMS OVERGROWN DRIVEWAY . Wednesday one of her Marie Antoinette dolls. It is with no small amount of personal satisfaction that I declare Fester Addams legal executor of the Addams estate and rightful owner of all properties and possessions contained herein. GOMEZ 91.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . the attempts to impugn this man's character or question his identity have been woefully inadequate. Pugsley his chemistry set. Granny carries her favorite cauldron. dragging a toy wagon packed with his rings. sticking out of the trunk. Morticia carries out Cleo. his coat draped over his shoulders as if he were an invalid. his glove. Thing follows.

He looks back never heard French. I like it. n'est pas.LATER. mon cher? As she turns to Gomez. Her mother pats her consolingly. It's as if been leeched from at her as if he's Huh? Wednesday tends to him. we see the interior of the bungalow -. The asphalt has been ripped up in big chunks and Lurch's tree is parked next to the Addams' new home. PUGSLEY This place isn't so bad. With an icepick and a hammer. GOMEZ GRANNY CUT TO: 131 . 130 A two-story NEON ARROW points the way to this bungalow court -. she deftly makes a large spidery CRACK in the round mirror. The Addams' Duesenberg is parked in front of the furthest cabin. she stands back to admire her handiwork. dear.U. PUGSLEY comes from the bathroom. MORTICIA That's the soap. LOG CABINS OF SIMULATED WOOD surround the TEEPEE-SHAPED OFFICE.11/28/90 130 EXT. They even put candy in the bathroom. GOMEZ sits slumped in a hyde.SAME TIME C. WAMPUM COURT . (CONTINUED) She and her mother exchange a chair made from wagon wheel and naugaall of his insane. 131 INT.Bright and awful ersatz western. MORTICIA Just as long as we're together. nibbling a wrapped bar of motel soap.all ersatz cowboy and Indian mixed with chrome-plated plastic and orange shag carpet. Sighing deeply.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . DRESSING TABLE MIRROR Morticia leans into frame. vibrant energy has him. 92. He's a broken man. worried look. BUNGALOW . Granny joins her.

Father? GOMEZ (in a monotone) They're very bad for you. He takes a bar of soap from Pugsley.11/20/90 131 CONTINUED: Oh. WEDNESDAY (very worried) Father? PUGSLEY 93. He takes another greedy bite. CUT TO: A133 EXT.U. Abigail.. and morosely eats. ADDAMS MANSION . on three hands. (CONTINUED) A133 132 132A .all of them wet and bedraggled and gasping for air. The family moves closer to Gomez. ADDAMS YARD . Gomez unwraps it CUT TO: 132 132A OMITTED INT. GOMEZ But maybe I'll have one of those. ABIGAIL (to Fester) You're doing this on purpose.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .MIDWAY TO THE VAULT C. and Tully . Wednesday pats her father's arm..MIDNIGHT THE COAL CHUTE ON THE SIDE OF THE HOUSE -drops open. 131 Wednesday exchanges a panic-stricken look with Morticia. dumping out Fester. as they reach up to pull three of the countless chains. WEDNESDAY Do you want a cigar.

Morticia squarely faces the crisis. A133 They all struggle to their feet and march grimly back toward the door. as Addamses? GRANNY Kill the hare.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA We are Addamses. and we will not submit. 133 WEDNESDAY Put the tortoise on the highway. And why? GRANNY Because we like it! (CONTINUED) .11/20/90 A133 CONTINUED: 94. Who recalls the fable of the tortoise and the hare? The swift.the mattress pushed aside. Boil it. strangle us. A bowl of MOTEL SOAPS is beside him. CUT TO: 133 INT. A damp cloth covers his eyes. the want ads open on the table before her. WAMPUM COURT BUNGALOW . She addresses the family from the head of the breakfast table.MORNING Gomez is STRETCHED OUT on the naked box springs of his bed -. In contrast. yet lazy little cottontail. Thing MASSAGES his aching head. break our bones we will come back for more. MORTICIA Yes! We will survive! Poison us. and his slow but determined companion? What does that story teach us. PUGSLEY During rush hour. Skin it.

133 134 135 .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . CUT TO: 134 135 OMMITTED OMITTED 94A..11/12/90 133 CONTINUED: PUGSLEY Because we're Addamses! Gomez tries to rouse himself. GOMEZ (out of it) We're Addamses.soap bubbles floating from his mouth.. He burps -.

Cars speed by. with my children. 136 Wednesday and Pugsley have set up a LEMONADE STAND. Carrying a SAMPLE VACUUM CLEANER and a bucket. Pugsley offers him a cup of punch. An array of POISONS are lined up on their rickety table. Here. EMPLOYMENT AGENCY Morticia is being interviewed by a PERSONNEL OFFICER. Lurch comes out of the motel courtyard. PUGSLEY On the house. Lurch BURPS -. one day each week I visit Death Row at our local prison.your domestic skills can be very valuable.11/28/90 136 EXT. service organizations? MORTICIA Well. a relentlessly perky gal with a clipboard. The pitcher on the table before them steams. Have you been a volunteer. Lurch downs it in a gulp and heads off.DAY 95. Lurch. Feeling the effects of the lemonade. They've slashed their prices to a nickel per cup.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . PERSONNEL OFFICER We have so many homemakers re-entering the work force . their contribution to the Addams' financial well-being. SIDEWALK IN FRONT OF THE WAMPUM COURT . (CONTINUED) PERSONNEL OFFICER 137 138 . CUT TO: 137 138 OMITTED INT. PERSONNEL OFFICER (knowingly) Liberal Arts. Major? MORTICIA Spells and Hexes. College? MORTICIA Private tutors. PTA.a tongue of flame shoots from his mouth and INCINERATES A WOODEN INDIAN advertising the Wampum Court.

Abigail is going through a stack of colorful travel brochures. PERSONNEL OFFICER (with some bitterness) Of course not. and begins rifling through her card file. MORTICIA 96. ABIGAIL Acapulco? Cancun? (she snaps her fingers in the air.A loafer? A hopeless layabout? A shiftless dreamer? MORTICIA (wistfully) Not anymore. But it's not his fault. What is he . ADDAMS LIVING ROOM . right after lunch. CUT TO: 139 INT. CUT TO: FESTER 139 . we'll go everywhere.. PERSONNEL OFFICER Well. 138 The Personnel Officer shoots Morticia a doubtful glance.where should we go first? FESTER (sadly) I don't know. Fester stares off into space. what about your husband? Is he currently employed? MORTICIA He's. We'll try again.once we find the money. he's going through a bad patch at the moment. ABIGAIL The Mediterranean.DAY Abigail and Fester are seated at opposite ends of the couch.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. trying to be festive) Ariba! Ariba! You choose.. the Riviera . Gordon .. castanetstyle.4/03/91 138 CONTINUED: PERSONNEL OFFICER (perplexed) With your children? Autographs.

.

GIRL SCOUT I only like all-natural foods and beverages. (CONTINUED) PUGSLEY WEDNESDAY . WAMPUM COURT . They are negotiating with a PRISSY LITTLE GIRL IN A GIRL SCOUT UNIFORM. A140 Wednesday and Pugsley are at their lemonade stand.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Are you sure they're real lemons? Yes. Organically grown.4/03/91 A140 EXT. with no preservatives. GIRL SCOUT (with grave doubts) Is this made from real lemons? Yes. The girl scout carries several boxes of Girl Scout cookies.LATER THAT DAY A96A.

In a panic.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . SCREAMS again. SUBURBAN HOUSE .DAY White clapboard. Geraniums in the flower boxes. Lurch steps inside and shuts the door as best he can. like the salesman's manual undoubtedly advised. turns to challenge the perpetrator of this atrocity and. seeing Lurch. I'll buy you buy a box of my girl scout cookies.. he rings the doorbell. onto her peach Oriental rug. the tools of his new trade. A140 WEDNESDAY Are they made from real girl scouts? CUT TO: 140 EXT. Surrounded by a white picket fence. CUT TO: 141 142 & 143 A144 B144 OMITTED OMITTED 141 142 & 143 A144 B144 140 OMITTED OMITTED . Lurch carefully opens the little white gate. opens the door -.only to be greeted by a BUCKETFUL OF SLOP thrown past her. The door swings open and Lurch exits. Carrying his SAMPLE VACUUM CLEANER AND BUCKET. she tries to slam the door on Lurch. Do deal? 96A. he STICKS his foot in the way.. AT THE DOOR. obviously in a hurry. jauntily waving a check. A moment passes. The door partially RIPS off its hinges. afraid he might break something. I a cup. but. if delicious we have a GIRL SCOUT tell you what. A BLONDE HOUSEWIFE in tennis whites.2/26/91 A140 CONTINUED: Well. She SCREAMS in horror.

. sitting on carpet squares. 144 Morticia is telling a story to a group of TODDLERS. and so the witch lured Hansel and Gretel into the candy house.. MORTICIA . what do you think that feels like? After a beat. with crayon drawings taped to the walls. Hansel pushed the poor. who have gathered in a circle around her.DAY 97.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Now. low and behold. defenseless witch into the oven instead. DAYCARE CENTER . by promising them more sweets.2/22/91 144 INT. The room is sunny and cheerful. all the toddlers begin to CRY and WAIL. and she was about to push them in. CUT TO: . writhing in agony. Where she was burned alive. boys and girls. when. And she told them to look in the oven.

SAME TIME Granny. standing on the bed.DAY Granny holds a club behind her back as she stalks something.the stuff of legend. running now. kitty. hurries past the open window of the bungalow. ALEX TREBEK (reading from the card) Monsters Of History for $200.. on the TV set ." GOMEZ (shouts) Grandfather Addams! (smacks his forehead.SAME TIME Eating compulsively form a box of Mallomars. 145 thru 147 148 thru 152 A153 OMITTED OMITTED EXT. WAMPUM BUNGALOW . WAMPUN BUNGALOW . She stops at the sight of Gomez inside. BUNGALOW . Gomez is still stretched out on the naked box springs.11/20/90 145 thru 147 148 thru 152 A153 OMITTED 98. GERALDO Voodoo zombies . "Jeopardy" is on. kitty. or a living nightmare? Do zombies really exist? How are they made? Where can we find them? Call in with your comments. hosting his tabloid style show. club raised.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GRANNY Here kitty. (CONTINUED) . A154 C. CUT TO: 153 INT. "He was known as the Butcher of Bavaria.U. He stares vacantly at a game show on TV.. staring at the television. hard) Damn! Not in the form of a question! CUT TO: 153 A154 EXT.Gomez is now watching Geraldo Rivera.

we have this little nest. Geraldo is talking to a woman in A155 GERALDO So your son was brainwashed by voodoo slave masters and forced to recruit others. Yes. having lunch. Yes.AN HOUR LATER C.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 99. A154 Gomez reaches CUT TO: 154 INT. please stop calling. on the TV screen. (CONTINUED) .. ABIGAIL Just the two of us. FESTER (very flat) Yes. GERALDO (cutting him off) Mr. CUT TO: FESTER FESTER 154 A155 INT. ADDAMS MANSION DINING ROOM . And meanwhile. Abigail mimics him. Addams.. GOMEZ (on the studio PA system) Geraldo. As Fester repeats "Yes. Mother. for the phone. in his drone. We don't know where they meet. the studio audience. ABIGAIL We'll find the money.U. silently. Let's take a call. It is very quiet.11/20/90 A154 CONTINUED: A CALL-IN NUMBER is flashed on the screen. Without that dreadful family.DAY Abigail and Gordon are seated at opposite ends of the table. away from the world. Mother". Mother. ABIGAIL After lunch. we'll try again. Mother. BUNGALOW . Quiet and cozy. Our dream come true.

seated on the edge of the box spring. and a mountain of junk food wrappers. boy. Morticia brings Gomez the remote control for the TV. He switches off the set and stares at the blank screen. Gomez uses the remote to switch channels. Re-run. All he does is watch TV and eat.S. and Wednesday brings him a copy of TV Guide. A155 PULL BACK to the motel room. CUT TO: GOMEZ An episode of . GRANNY Dinner's going to be late. Pugsley. Morticia. Ritually.11/20/90 A155 CONTINUED: 100. Here. and Lurch brings him a canister of "Pringles". The whole family. She slams the door. Gomez lets the phone drop.Gomez. Gomez is now surrounded by junk food. let's go for a drive. as handmaidens. PUGSLEY I don't understand. GOMEZ (not even turning) A drive? And miss "Matlock"? Granny opens the door and sticks her head in. tries to comfort him. We hear her whistling. boy. MORTICIA I know .) Here. Wednesday and Lurch are seated nearby. GRANNY (O. "The Cosby Show" comes on. Pugsley brings Gomez a bag of "Doritos". as at a death watch.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . bags and styrofoam containers. very worried about Gomez.

2/7/91 A155A INT. I wish 100A. then who is he. I did.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . CUT TO: . A155A* WEDNESDAY Why is that lady doing all this? MORTICIA It's hard to say.LATER Morticia is putting Wednesday to bed. Morticia kisses Wednesday and she closes her eyes to go to sleep. mother? MORTICIA I don't know. And sometimes they just haven't found their special place in life. WEDNESDAY If that man isn't Uncle Fester. WAMPUM COURT . Sometimes people have had terrible childhoods. And sometimes they're dogs from hell and must be destroyed. darling.

Abigail sits on the bed beside him. It's because it's taking us a little longer than we'd hoped to find the gold. Lurch is flat out on the floor. Tomorrow. don't you worry . I think it's beautiful. Well. and turns) You know. Don't you. She goes to the door. She looks around at her family. and Thing uses Pugsley. ABIGAIL I know why you've been so glum. She strokes his hair lovingly. for a mother and son to be so close. B155 The family sleeps . Pugsley snores the inhale part of a snore. (she kisses him on the forehead. She sits up in bed beside Gomez. Isn't that right? Fester turns away.for a long beat. Wednesday sleeps in the same bed as Granny. CUT TO: AC155 INT. Morticia stares down at Gomez .4/03/91 B155 INT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . FESTER'S BEDROOM . Lurch groans the exhale part. WAMPUM . Gordon? Fester mumbles something. she gets out of bed. (CONTINUED) AC155* . some people might think it's strange. tucking him in. my darling. and Thing punctuates by wiggling.MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 101.NIGHT Fester is lying in bed. ABIGAIL (very stern) What? FESTER (dutifully) Yes. depressed. under his breath. for certain. It's beautiful. the covers around his chin. Full of resolve. ABIGAIL Of course it is. Pugsley uses him for a mattress.all but Morticia.we're right on the verge. mother. and stands.

CUT TO: E155 EXT. MORTICIA I would like to speak with Fester. AC155 Abigail exits. 102.A LITTLE LATER Tully opens the front door. wearing her cloak. heads off down the walk. Fester gets out of bed. Unseen by her. BUNGALOW . He smiles maliciously at the sight of Morticia on the stoop. CUT TO: F155 OMITTED F155 E155 D155 C155 ..LATER Morticia.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . also attempting to block her way. TULLY We've been expecting you. just outside Gate. MORTICIA Stop it. struggles to get it open. The minute the door shuts. and begins to climb out. you two. Thing trails after. Thing clutching the bars.. Tully steps aside. CUT TO: C155 EXT.4/03/91 AC155 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (instantly very sweet. ADDAMS MANSION .I'm weeping. Morticia breaks free of Thing. dabbing her eye with a fingertip) Look . fully dressed.A LITTLE LATER Morticia. GATE . He is fully clothed. CUT TO: D155 EXT. He goes to the window. Morticia crosses the threshold.

2/19/91 155 103. Mrs. He waves to no avail. sticking out his thumb. ABIGAIL Stop stalling! FESTER I'm not stalling! Stop badgering me! ABIGAIL (pushing Fester aside) Tully. DANCES AROUND in frustration. Fester and Tully are securing her hands and feet.any thoughts? MORTICIA (sweetly. CUT TO: 156 INT. consumed by greed and infinite bitterness. The vault. Mother. under Abigail's supervision.. A passing car splashes him with mud. I pity you. take over! Tighten it! (CONTINUED) . in a kamikaze leap.let's get started. MORTICIA (to Abigail. ABIGAIL Gordon .A LITTLE LATER 156 Morticia is now stretched out on the torture RACK. then tries HITCHHIKING. Persecution. I don't hate you.NIGHT 155 Thing does his damnedest to flag down any of the few oncoming cars. he GRABS ahold of the bumper of the next car that comes along and hangs on for dear life as the car SPEEDS down the street.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. Screwing up his courage. INTERSECTION AT THE FOOT OF THE ADDAMS HILL . to Abigail) Despite everything. agitated. STUDY . Addams . FESTER But. fiendish torture. graciously) You are a desperate woman. Fester seems torn. upset. (a beat) We could have been such friends. inhuman depravity sometimes it's just not enough. EXT. ABIGAIL I don't think so.

She MOANS. It's just me. but I've got this stomach thing. in afterglow. you know that. More BONE-POPPING NOISES. ABIGAIL (shoving Tully toward the rack) Do it! TULLY (to Morticia. She sighs. CUT TO: ABIGAIL ABIGAIL ABIGAIL . MORTICIA (to Tully. BONE-POPPING NOISES. rather sensually. Tighter! Tully tightens the rack a third time. Morticia MOANS again. politely) Where's your bathroom? NOW! Tully shuts his eyes and tightens the rack. STRETCHING SOUND. flirtatiously) You've done this before. She opens her eyes. even more orgasmically.2/19/91 156 CONTINUED: (2) 103A. She glances at Tully. 156 TULLY I'd love to. Morticia's bones make a horrible POPPING. very voluptuously. Again! Tully tightens the rack again.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . When I torture people. Morticia MOANS.

) We're paid through Thing rushes in. 157 A hand possessed. 158 EXT. After a beat: Who is it? Thursday. raising dust as he goes. GOMEZ (O. CUT TO: 159 INT. In the background. then stops dead to knock on the cabin door. BUNGALOW . Thing RACES up the driveway.2/19/91 157 EXT. BUNGALOW . the rest of the family sleeps. WAMPUM COURT . (CONTINUED) 159 158 .NIGHT 104. frantically signing.S. He opens the door.NIGHT Thing leaps dramatically onto the porch.MINUTES LATER Thing skitters on the kitchen counter.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .

Thing! It's terrible when you stutter! 105.A FEW MINUTES LATER Morticia is now lashed to an ENORMOUS TORTURE WHEEL. FESTER (to Abigail) You can't! Not with red-hot pokers! TULLY (queasy) Is this gonna smell? MORTICIA (graciously.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Which is the real you .. and heads off. 159 Frustrated. FESTER Morticia. underhanded monster we came to love? FESTER (desperately) Don't ask me. GOMEZ Morticia in danger. with understanding) Tully Alford .... please.. GOMEZ'S STUDY . under-handed monster you've become? Or the loathsome. Deadbeat. Tully and Abigail are tending the stick BRANDING IRONS stuck in the roaring fire..the loathsome.charlatan. TULLY Well.. stop! Thing flops down in exhausted triumph. MORTICIA Dear Fester . How Gomez adored you.or whomever you are. stop! help at once .2/26/91 159 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (whispers) Slow down. Send Gomez grabs him CUT TO: 160 161 OMITTED INT. Thing grabs a SPOON and begins tapping out MORSE CODE.. (CONTINUED) 160 161 . not enough. Parasite.

I have a thought. ABIGAIL (furious) Gordon? FESTER (very upset) I was. I know it was you. 105A... ABIGAIL Gordon..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . ABIGAIL . be my guest. restless! I couldn't sleep. Since you and Mrs.4/03/91 161 CONTINUED: MORTICIA Fester . top of my head. Addams are so very close. at my window...I saw you tonight. CUT TO: . Just a notion. 161 Abigail takes a red-hot POKER out of the fire and hands it to Fester.. Tell me what you think.

STUDY . The car glides silently through Gate -.who opens uncharacteristically without a creak.NIGHT Gomez cuts the engine. 162 thru 164 A165 INT.11/17/90 162 thru 164 A165 OMITTED 106.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . CUT TO: 165 INT. (CONTINUED) 165 . Gomez sees the reflections of the roaring fire through the study window. Thing skulks after him. Thing JUDO-FLIPS in after Gomez. DUESENBERG .SAME TIME As Fester takes the poker and approaches Morticia GOMEZ CRASHES THROUGH THE WINDOW. Gomez stops the car and skulks out. in a back-flip.

Tully's sword is knocked from his hand and he's sent tumbling backwards.HIS BLADE FLASHING LIKE LIGHTNING. 165 Tully also grabs a saber. one for me! Tully looks up at Gomez with cowardly. old man..) .2/15/91 165 CONTINUED: Cara mia! Mon cher! Addams! Thing tosses Gomez a saber off the study wall. Never again! Not TULLY This is for keeps.shredding the front of Gomez's jacket.S. In a blur of action. Gomez! just doubloons! Tully feints.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA Darling.. Let him up! Gomez turns to see. and.. ABIGAIL MORTICIA GOMEZ 107. then slashes . take care! Without even looking. GOMEZ Dirty pool. Gomez parries Tully's blow from behind.. GOMEZ . GOMEZ One for you. pleading eyes. I'm your lawyer. and approaches Gomez from behind. Gomez ATTACKS . Tully.. finally landing on his knees. I'm on retainer.. (CONTINUED) ABIGAIL (O.. it's Tully. Then he whirls on Tully. TULLY Gomez..

feet. (2) 108. on the torture wheel. CU on Fester.12/3/90 165 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL who now has a pistol aimed at Morticia.. Our wheel..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ Tish . Gomez throws aside his sword. confused at watching this emotional display. Gomez is near enough now to take Morticia's hand. 165 One shot and Tully scrambles to his ABIGAIL (to Gomez) That's right! Now get moving Addams. GOMEZ (to Morticia) To live without you ..seeing you like this. And if you're not back in one hour. Morticia will die horribly. blood boils. (CONTINUED) MORTICIA MORTICIA My . take him to the vault. and using her accent) I displace her. (the pistol aimed at Morticia.only that would be torture. GOMEZ (touching the torture wheel) This wheel of pain.. As does mine.

165 MORTICIA (to Gomez) A day alone .. Addams - FESTER But. Allow me." Seeing the title of the book."Hurricane Irene: Nightmare from Above. Gomez reaches for the book that will open the secret panel: ABIGAIL Can it.realizing what he's about to do. Gomez kisses Morticia's hand... old man.I should've left you where I found you! At Abigail's final words. Mother can't we. Fester reaches for a DIFFERENT BOOK -.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .only that would be death. snivelling baby! A stone around my neck! What was I thinking . Tully suddenly panics: (CONTINUED) FESTER . Gomez looks into Fester's eyes -." but Fester stops him from pulling it.you're nothing but a useless. Fester suddenly LEAPS FORWARD. FESTER No tricks. Knock it off! right now! ABIGAIL The vault. Gomez! That's the wrong book! CLOSE UP Gomez's hand is on the right book. GOMEZ (murmuring) Good show....2/15/91 165 CONTINUED: (3) 109. Gordon! Stop dragging your feet! You disgust me . "Greed.

Gordon listen to mother! FESTER I'll never listen to you . releasing Morticia from the torture wheel.to safety! MORTICIA But what of Fester? (CONTINUED) . Tully! Back off! ANGLE on Gomez. really? TULLY I'm your friend. my love . my dearest..think of the doubloons! FESTER They're not yours.not ever again! ABIGAIL I had to be strict with you because I cared! Put it down! FESTER You never really loved me! ANGLE on Gomez and Morticia. GOMEZ Come. ABIGAIL Keep the book closed. GOMEZ Leather straps. nearing the bookcase. my darling! He helps her down from the wheel. ANGLE on Fester. as Tully cowers. Gordon! You don't know what it can do! It's not just literture! FESTER (advancing on Tully) Oh.. 165 TULLY Put that book down.3/18/91 165 CONTINUED: (4) 110. MORTICIA Later. facing off with Abigail. Gordon . red-hot pokers.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA Quickly.

Then he blasts Abigail out as well. ABIGAIL Stop whining. which pelts him with papers and other flying debris. and the bookshelf slams shut. GOMEZ (calling out to Fester) Old man! This way! ANGLE ON THING. Fester desperately tries to close the book to quell the storm. He tries to hold the bookshelf open for Fester to follow. with electricity coursing through him. to Fester) Old man. this way! ANGLE on Abigail and Fester. Gomez can no longer fight the storm. Thing fights the wind. across the room. struggling across the floor toward the bookshelf. MOVE IN on the storm raging within the pages of the book. ANGLE ON GOMEZ. He falls to the floor.2/28/91 165 CONTINUED: (5) 110A. Amid the storm. who has now pulled the right book. 165 GOMEZ (calling out. but a HUGE BOLT OF LIGHTNING ZAPS HIM.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . "Greed". and blasts Tully out of the window. you little goodfor-nothing! Be a man! FESTER You're a terrible mother! I said it! There. to open the bookshelf. he is leading Morticia behind the bookshelf. Fester opens the book. fighting the gale force winds. then FADE TO BLACK FADE IN ON: 166 thru 169 170 171 thru 173 OMITTED 166 thru 169 170 171 thru 173 OMITTED OMITTED .

174 A group of little CHILDREN approach the front door. etc. We do not see who has opened the door. ADDAMS MANSION. and they all carry trick-or-treat bags. they SCREAM IN HORROR and run.. terrified. As the door opens.. NEXT OCTOBER . They giggle and chatter. a skeleton. CUT TO: CHILDREN ." The children are dressed in traditional Halloween costumes . but the children do.NIGHT 110B.2/28/91 174 EXT. and he KNOCKS on the front door.. One of the children is pushed forward. a ghost. After a beat. back toward the street. the children CHANT: Trick or.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . They freeze in mid-chant.there's a witch. There is a hand-lettered sign on the door reading "HALLOWEEN OPEN HOUSE.

calm down. 111.) . I even made finger sandwiches. All the decorations are elegant yet ancient. old man! MORTICIA (delighted) Look at you. The crystal gloves in the chandeliers have been replaced by miniature jack olanterns. hang from the sconces by the nooses around their necks. Perched on Fester's shoulder. FESTER (petting Thing) Oh. dead branches and spanish moss. on the stairs and the furniture. There are clusters of black and orange balloons.12/3/90 175 INT. he picks Pugsley up. Wednesday is dressed in her usual style. Here we come! Wednesday and Pugsley come down the stairs. The adults are delighted. covered with cobwebs. Skulls. GRANNY Well. (CONTINUED) PUGSLEY (O. carrying a tray of food. Gomez hangs upside down from the balcony. it's their loss. A banner on the wall reads "HAPPY HALLOWEEN". each wearing a top hat. COMPLETE WITH BALD HEAD AND GREATCOAT. each holding a candle. him a decoration. Skeletons.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Morticia hands Granny appears from the kitchen. GOMEZ Pugsley. A stuffed. 175 The family is busily decorating the house for their annual Halloween festivities. but Pugsley is dressed as a tiny version of UNCLE FESTER. and the letters drip with blood. life-size scarecrow leans against the stairway.SAME TIME Lurch is closing the front door. PUGSLEY (to Uncle Fester) How do you like it? Fester is very touched. are scattered about. FRONT HALL . dusty and faded. Thing shakes in fear. looking puzzled. Uncle Fester and Thing are draping the banisters and stairway railings with a garland made from crepe paper. with a pitchfork through its throat. Gomez flips down onto his feet.S.

175 (CONTINUED) . GOMEZ Let's get a picture! MORTICIA Oh yes . Lurch? 111A.in the den.2/15/91 175 CONTINUED: FESTER What can I say? He's going to break hearts.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .

he is painting Fester and Pugsley's portrait. GOMEZ Look. Cousin It . (CONTINUED) 176 . CUT TO: 176 INT. carving a pumpkin. GOMEZ (admiringly) It is a wonderful hat. darling? your costume? Where's WEDNESDAY (solemnly) This is my costume. Margaret and Cousin It sit together. Lurch has set up an easel and canvas. obviously very much in love.11/20/90 175 CONTINUED: 112. Everyone turns.I almost didn't recognize you. MARGARET Isn't he handsome? Everyone keeps asking where he bought his costume. Morticia is knitting.A FEW MINUTES LATER Fester and Pugsley are posed at one end of the room. Granny brings people cups of steaming punch.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . complete with wand. Margaret is radiant. Lurch opens the door. everyone! We have guests! MORTICIA Hello. Margaret. Margaret is dressed as a fairy princess. I'm a homicidal maniac. Cousin It wears a cowboy hat. MARGARET Trick or treat! COUSIN IT Ooot oot glibber. They look just like everyone else. There is a KNOCK on the door. DINING ROOM . MARGARET (to Wednesday) And what are you. 175 Everyone starts to move toward the den. Standing outside are Margaret and Cousin It. a bandanna and a holster. from a punch bowl. Gomez and Wednesday are sitting on the floor amid newspapers. holding hands.

MORTICIA That unfortunate woman. said that. and I'm not bitter. old sport . Now that I've got my memory back. With amnesia. WEDNESDAY Children begging in the streets. stop. 176 She just MARGARET I'm sorry.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .it's such a special time. but I blame Tully. GOMEZ (to It) You remember. COUSIN IT Ooot blipper gleep. WEDNESDAY From the Bermuda Triangle. sadly) But not enough.my real family. twenty-five years ago.2/19/91 176 CONTINUED: FESTER Halloween . PUGSLEY (to Fester) She wasn't your mother. (shaking her head. Ghosts and goblins. How true. (CONTINUED) . I'm blushing. Witches on broomsticks. MORTICIA Stranger things have COUSIN IT 113. Ooot oot oot. Filled with evil. COUSIN IT Ooot oot gleep. FESTER I'm so glad I can share this night with my family . MARGARET (the coquette) Oh.she really did find him tangled in a tuna net. happened.

2/19/91 176 CONTINUED: GRANNY (to Fester) Thank God for that lightning. Knocked some sense into you.. Uncle Fester? GOMEZ (jovially) Pugsley. PUGSLEY Please.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. 176 (CONTINUED) . 113A.

MORTICIA Of course . to Gomez remembering this childhood favorite) "Wake The Dead"! GOMEZ (equally excited) "Wake The Dead"! Out to the cemetery! Come on. having finished the pumpkin. He places it on a table.2/19/91 176 CONTINUED: (2) 114. all the old sayings are true."Wake The Dead. There's no place like home. everyone! Everyone starts to exit. Pugsley giggles. It lights. chattering happily. It has ONE EYE IN THE MIDDLE OF ITS FOREHEAD. GOMEZ All right. and lights the candle inside.time for a game! What shall it be . 176 PUGSLEY For the picture? Fester pops a light bulb into his mouth. And blood is thicker than water.bobbing for apples? Charades? COUSIN IT Ooot glibber glip.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez stands up. MORTICIA And just as refreshing. FESTER You know. everybody . The pumpkin glows." FESTER (delighted. Everyone oohs and ahhs. MARGARET (to Granny) I've never played this before how does it go? GRANNY Did you bring a shovel? (CONTINUED) MARGARET .

Fester flips Gomez in a JUDO FLIP. in a manly GOMEZ Let us never be parted. EXPERTLY MOUNTED AND STUFFED. Three skulls and a pelvis . Fester runs out. Fester rises.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . dusting himself off. 176 PUGSLEY Uncle Fester.3/18/91 176 CONTINUED: (3) 114A. Gomez LANDS At the foot of a glass display case. FESTER (joyfully. FESTER Let us always be as one. MORTICIA (touched by the brothers devotion) And just as refreshing.how's that? Pugsley and Wednesday cheer and run out.we'll give you a head start. to Gomez and Morticia) Come on! MORTICIA We'll catch up. Gomez. CUT TO: . Fester takes it.who could be more precious? GOMEZ Blood is thicker than water. old man. will you be on my team? No. Gomez offers his hand. mine! FESTER (to Wednesday) I tell you what . Fester faces WEDNESDAY FESTER My own dear brother . handshake. The camera pans up the case. It contains ABIGAIL AND TULLY.

Everyone -. FRONT HALL 115-117. they are moving toward the front door. of its own accord. a wolf HOWLS. followed by Granny's CACKLE. torches are seen.SAME TIME 179 MORTICIA Morticia and Gomez are silhouetted in the doorway..together at last.. like fireflies. what are they? GOMEZ Oh.. as the front door SWINGS OPEN. What more could we ask? Gomez? Morticia holds up the garment she's been knitting . In the distance. GOMEZ (ecstatic) Cara mia.. CUT TO: 179 EXT.3/18/91 177 178 OMITTED INT. ADDAMS MANSION . There is a FULL MOON. mon cher. is it true? MORTICIA (shaking her head "yes") Oui. FADE OUT. 177 178 Everyone is gone.. Wispy GHOSTS flit through the night sky. MORTICIA (deeply satisfied) Our family. A human SCREAM is heard. They embrace.it's a BABY JUMPER WITH THREE LEGS. Morticia and Gomez have drifted into the front hall. THE END .THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. Tish . In the cemetery.what a night.

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