Its true, words do mean more than their dictionary definition and so it is with the

phrase the Fear of Speaking. Its a familiar, socially acceptable, and convenient
phrase to explain away ones reluctance to engage in Public Speaking. And its
that very common use and acceptance that does more to produce less from a
majority of citizens by discouraging civil participation in public conversations.
Conversations that might be important, even crucial, to their well-being.
The statistics generated by a recent Google search indicate that about 75% of
people polled say their #1 fear is The Fear of Speaking. That statistic varies by
Poll, but when I first became aware of a Fear of Speaking statistic in 2009, it
was reported at about 45-50% in a similar search. Now, whether the polling is
more accurate or people are becoming more fearful doesnt alter the fact that the
challenges we and our planet face are increasing in number, complexity, and cost.
Well, what about devising solutions to all these challenges? Complex challenges
almost always require complex solutions, often enabled by collaboration of pieces
of information. More people, more input. More input, more opportunities to find a
solution. This is another situation where less isnt always more. Lets digress...
Take a crossword puzzle for example. If the puzzle was designed using all 26
letters, but I was only given 8 letters to choose from, my chance of a successful
solution is in doubt. Although I might not require all 26 letters to complete the
puzzle, every additional letter provided improves my chances. Based on my
experience with crossword puzzles, my skill with words, and a little luck, I might
solve it with less than 26 letters. But when it comes to solutions, almost always,
more input is better.
At this time of human and planetary evolution, when we sorely need substantial
thoughtful, creative, experienced input to arrive at effective solutions, were not
getting it. We dont get the input of half-to-three-quarters of our population. What
we do have is Delegation not Participation. Commenting with the click of a mouse
is an action, but not to be confused with standing-up and saying I have an idea.
Its less embarrassing, or so it seems, to say to yourself and to others I cant
speak in public, I have a fear-of-speaking, its called Glossophobia.
Well, my experience teaching & coaching Public Speaking group workshops and
private clients, indicates that most people dont suffer with clinical Glossophobia.
Nor do they suffer with Communication Apprehension.
Performance of Speaking tomjdolan.com tom@tomjdolan.com
Fear of Speaking Toxic Phrase, Toxic Results
Tom j Dolan / Tokyo
When confronted with Speaking, anyone may experience anxiety, nerves, sweats,
nausea, dry mouth, stage fright, insecurity, or a desire to be, at that moment,
somewhere else. But
On the other hand, these same people dont experience an intense, unreasonable
fear of leaving their homes and mixing with people in a public place. They dont
fear the possibility of talking in public to a store clerk, an Agent at an airline ticket
counter, or the waitperson at a restaurant. Most people frequently talk in public to
their family, friends, co-workers, fellow travelers and dozens more known and
occasionally unknown people. Its the stuff of life.
Of course, speaking anxiety can present itself when theres a requirement or
expectation to speak to a Group, any group: a class, meeting, seminar, social
dinner or professional event. Many people will go to great lengths to avoid even
the possibility of addressing a group. With a knee-jerk response theyll say I cant
speak to a group!, Im not a good speaker., Oh, I couldnt do that!, or any
other statement that essentially says I have a Fear of Speaking. And if statistics
are correct, most of the people you ask will nod in agreement.
If you do a web search right now for the phrase Fear of Speaking, youll get a
return of approximately 126,000,000 responses. Amongst those returns are
countless Speaking Trainers, Coaches, & organizations that have a solution for
your Fear of Speaking. That phrase has become a ubiquitous flag to get your
attention. And surely this marketing strategy must work because almost every
Speaking organization sells it. Its a drum-beat of sorts: sell the Fear, the Fear
I suppose if any phrase is used often enough, people not only accept it, eventually
they embrace it. Unfortunately the embrace of the phrase The Fear of Speaking
has become a death-grip. It strangles initiative and risk-taking. The phrase has
become more than its words, more than an indicator of social anxiety, more than
a simple excuse. It has become a justification for non-participation in public
conversations that might be important, decisive, even critical to a persons well-
being, and by association, to the well-being of the rest of us.
I think its long overdue to recognize the phrase The Fear of Speaking for what it
is and what it isnt.
The phrase The Fear of Speaking is freely and commonly used interchangeably
with Glossophobia or Communication Apprehension both of which produce an
extreme or irrational fear of Speaking in Public, even of being out in Public places.
Well, the good news is, neither are the same thing as The Fear of Speaking as its
typically used which is as an explanation for avoiding speaking at public events.
I have met many people who avoided Public Speaking or speaking at public events
which actually is not the same thing as Glossophobia.
Performance of Speaking tomjdolan.com tom@tomjdolan.com
Avoidance is a more accurate statement of fact for most people. Unfortunately, the
connection between The Fear of Speaking and Glossophobia has become
ubiquitous. And so Fear of Speaking is typically o!ered-up as an acceptable
reason to avoid speaking in public events.
Compare these two:
Im getting help to control my Fear of Speaking, my Glossophobia.
-Really? Wow!
Im taking a workshop to learn public speaking skills.
-Thats nice.
The Fear of Speaking has evolved, acceptably, to incorporate not only the
phobia, but as a reason to not participate in public conversations. The real fear is
not The Fear of Speaking in public, its the fear of embarrassment when
speaking in public... and they are not the same thing.
A fear of embarrassment can arise from any number of reasons. In most
instances, I believe the person knows where the fear stems from even if they say
they dont. In actuality theres no reason to tell your Speaking Teacher you are
embarrassed by this or that, but some people do. And I confess that most of the
reasons offered up to me are remarkably unexceptional, and can be managed.
As a result of those revelations, it was apparent that in a supportive, safe, learning
environment, most students & clients could learn to manage, overcome, even
eliminate their fear of embarrassment through the acquisition of Speaking skills.
The Fear of Speaking is not as daunting as it has been made out to be. Its
inflated, exaggerated, overblown, and it should be excised from general use. Its
an inappropriate barrier to hide behind. Its a toxic misrepresentation of the
anxiety that most people feel. The Fear of Speaking doesnt serve the individual
nor the rest of us. In fact it deprives us of greater participation, narrow views,
unique solutions, re-drawn maps, thoughtful opinions. When it comes to solutions,
more input generally produces better results.
It all comes down to this: if you want to participate not delegate, and you have an
aversion to speaking in public, help is available. A local community college class,
a Speaking Coach, or a group like Toastmasters, can help you overcome your
resistance. Its not difficult to accomplish and the result can be a life-changing
experience for you. Speaking skills are learnable. Challenges proliferate.
Performance of Speaking tomjdolan.com tom@tomjdolan.com
Tom j Dolan, the Author, is a media professional and the producer of
Performance of Speaking an informative website devoted to
Training & Coaching both untrained & experienced Speakers who
want to contribute to the global conversations shaping the future of
our Communities, Regions, and Planet.