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‘AS H 49 wiwreR 1992 EDITOR: DAVID R. WYDER ASH is a publication devoted to all forms of expression and will appear twice in 1992. ASH welcomes your submission with an open mind. Send me your artwork, comics, collage, essays, poetry, prose, rants, raves, reviews and anything else you can think of that can be reproduced on these pages. Please send sufficient postage if you want your material returned. ASH #9 is available for $2.00 in cash, check made payable to the editor, trade, by lark or bull semen shipped frozen and from good and beef stock. Direct all requests for issues to: DAVID R. WYDER/ASH 121 GREGORY AVE. ,#B-7 PASSAIC, NJ 07055 submissions Back Issues of ASH #3-#8 are kept in the freezer with the bull semen and can be thawed out for $1.00 per issue. IN THE ASHTRAY-Lifeline for the next issue is July 1, 1992. New Jersey has more autos per square mile (699) than any other state. There are 5.9 million drivers in New Jersey. Your editor walks but still manages to "drive" people crazy without license or auto. Cover and Back Cover by Blair Wilson. See inside back cover for additional notes. FOR MATURE READERS _ CONTRIBUTORS JOHN M. BENNETT - COLUMBUS, OHIO JOHN BINNS* ~ YORKSHIRE, ENGLAND MICHAEL BROWNSTEIN ~ CHICAGO, ILLINOIS JUDSON CREWS - ALBUQUERQUE, NEW MEXICO JIM DeWITT* — KENTWOOD, MICHIGAN DANTEL E - CAMERON, WISCONSIN JOE E — RIVERTON, NEW JERSEY JULES EIRRONE ~ FT. WAYNE, INDIANA WALT FRANKLIN* ~ REXVILLE, NEW YORK JOHN GREY - PROVIDENCE, RHODE ISLAND DAVE HASKINS* - TIVERTON, RHODE ISLAND ROBERT HOWINGTON* - FT. WORTH, TEXAS PHILIP HUGHES - BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS ‘TODD KALINSKI - LINCOLN, NEBRASKA RICHARD KOSTELANETZ* - NEW YORK, NEW YORK ‘THOMAS KRETZ* - ROME, ITALY LYN LIFSHIN® ~ NISKAYUNA, NEW YORK JAMES LINDLEY - BELLINGHAM, WASHINGTON MATTHEW LUBICH* ~ JOHNSTOWN, COLORADO WILLIAM T. MASONIS* — LAUREL, MARYLAND GREG McGHEE* — PATERSON, NEW JERSEY ERROL MILLER - MONROE, LOUISTANA TODD MOORE* ~ BELVIDERE, ILLINOIS B.Z. NIDITCH.~ MILTON, MASSACHUSETTS OBERC - "LEXINGTON, KENTUCKY ANDY PLUMB* — GREENBRAE, CALIFORNIA PROLOGUE* - BRONX, NEW YORK JUDY ROSENBLATT* - NEW YORK, NEW YORK DAVID ROSKOS* - NEW BRUNSWICK, NEW JERSEY ROBERT SEGARRA* ~ BROOKLYN, NEW YORK PAUL SEMEL ~ WEST ORANGE, NEW JERSEY GLENN SHELDON* ~ PITTSBURGH, PENNSYLVANIA SELENA A. SHEPHARD* ~ GREENBRAE, CALIFORNIA DAVID P. SMITH* - SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH ‘T. KILGORE SPLAKE - MUNISING, MICHIGAN KEN STONE - PORTLANDVILLE, NEW YORK BELINDA SUBRAMAN - EL PASO, TEXAS JEFF SWAN = NACHES, WASHINGTON JUDE VASSEUR* - GARFIELD, NEW JERSEY KEN WAGNER ~ OLEAN, NEW YORK BRYAN WESTBROOK* — FAYETIVILLE, ARKANSAS BLAIR WILSON* ~ SEATTLE, WASHINGTON (*First Appearance In ASH) All rights revert to the above authors and artists at time of publication. Payment is one copy. Contributor discount available for additonal copies. aim ow PUBLISHING 1992 ‘There Is No Safe Sex’ 3 IESE ESSE EHD SS HSI SSIS ISIS IAI III SOI II III IIA TARAS I AA MOTHER'S DAY CARD Dear Mom, come home, all is forgiven. I'm a big boy now. What say we bury the placenta and be friends? Back in school whenever they'd ask “Why so stupid, so no-account?" I'd sing-song "I dunno!" and sometimes mumble "Mom." Bosses would scowl and bark "Defective by genes or choice’ "673-9507" I'd smile, giving them your phone. My wife would muster tears and wail “Why can't you behave? Grow up! I'd point to my navel and shrug. ‘Those days are ancient history. Put ‘er there, old womb of destiny! Your egg-laying days now on the shelf, no threat is poised generations to come. Drop by any time, meet the wife and kids. ‘Their presents to me this Father's Day you wouldn't believe. Or maybe you would. PHILIP HUGHES ‘THE RIBBON On a Sunday in the hunting season I discovered a roadside willow tree From which the brisk wind stirred Dangling privates of a whitetail deer. At first I thought it strange Fruit of city hunters Marking passage here like a dog Lifting its leg on a fire hydrant then recalled the story of A "Nam vet who, upon returning To the pride of folks who knew Only that he'd done his job Resumed his love for hunting. Soon the neighbors learned We had pinned the privates of A buck deer to a tree As he had done with genitals of an enemy in war. I stood before the penis, Testacles, tab of belly skin— A ribbon tied to a gift For the wind— knowing it belonged To more than a slaughtered deer. WALT FRANKLIN FERRER EEE a AAA A AA IAA A A AIA IAS AAAI III IAAI

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