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I actually kind of appreciate the Transformers movies.

Created by Terry van Feleday

Edited for PDF by Fat Lou

 

 

TALE !F C!"TE"T#

 Prolo$ue

Transformers %&''() 

 Part *+ efore time be$an, there -as the Cube. Part &+ Please buy our toys Part /+ !## FI01T2 Part 3+ 4eet the Autobots Part 5+ This part is short because the ne6t one is lon$. Part 7+ 8evelations Part (+ 4e$atron2 Part 9+ I:m bored no-, can -e start 8!TF already

Transformers+ 8even$e of the Fallen %&'';) 

 Part *+ 1oo oy. Part &+ <hat the fuck, 8even$e Part deu6 Part /+ 4eet the Autobots, Part & Part 3+ I can:t even summari=e this nonsense. Part 5+ <ell, there:s no avoidin$ it. Part 7+ The >4!?"TAI" DE<@ conspiracy Part (+ e-are the 8eedman. Part 9+ <ell hello there, old friend. Part ;+ <hat movie am I even -atchin$ at this point Part *'+ ...

This 

 is our villain Part **+ E1!LD T1E 0L!8 !F BETFI8E2 Part *&+ Devastator, hero of the -orkin$ class2 Part */+ I:m bored no-, can -e start D!T4 alroh $od -hat is happenin$ aaaaah I"TE84I##I!"  Duel %*;(*)

Transformers+ Dark of the 4oon %&'**) 

 Part *+ #trap in, kids. Its $oin$ to $et fuckin$ -eird...G Part &+ It is impossible to strive for the heroic life. The title of hero is besto-ed by the survivors upon the fallen, -ho themselves kno- nothin$ of heroism. Part /+ 0od is on your side Is 1e a Conservative The Devils on my side, hes a $ood Communist.G Part 3+ ein$ a kid and $ro-in$ up. Its hard and nobody understands.G Part 5+ 1eroism by order, senseless violence, and all the pestilent nonsense that $oes by the name of patriotism  ho- I hate them2G Part 7+ "othin$ beside remains, round the remains of that colossal -reck...G Part (+ <e -ant everybody to act like adults, Huit playin$ $ames, reali=e that its not ust my -ay or the hi$h-ay.G Part 9+ !rbitin$ Earth in the spaceship, I sa- ho- beautiful our planet is. People, let us preserve and increase this beauty, not destroy it2G Part ;+ The miracle is this+ The more -e share, the more -e have.G

 

Part *'+ America -ill never be destroyed from the outside. If -e falter and lose our freedoms, it -ill be because -e destroyed ourselves.J Part **+ The needs of the many... !ut-ei$h the needs of the fe-.G Part *&+ <elcome to the desert of the real. G  Part */... Part *3+ Every frame is so dense, it has #! 4?C1 $oin$ on2 Part *5+ Kincomprehensible Cybertronian chitterin$K Fin+ <as it all -orth itG <hy are all these robots so damn u$ly Conclusions, or really ust ramblin$s