On Growing a Beard

By Elton Camp
Hair on top’s impossible for me
For this my genes did decree
But I can hide my disgrace
By growing hair on my face
There it comes fast and thick
Growing a beard’s an easy trick
After only a single day
It starts, stiff and gray
For three days I let it grow
Family didn’t seen to know
Then my wife started rain’
!hy did you "uit shain’#
$It’s a beard I’m going to cultiate%
But the ery thought she did hate
$&orry, but no matter what you say
It’s my face and I’ll do it anyway'%
After fie days it was coming along
But then there was something wrong
A beard was becoming "uite a bitch
Because it most intensely did itch
(et not a word to her did I say
But ery "uietly shaed it away
$Horrible beard% would’e been a hoot
Instead of $!hat an ugly, bald old coot'%

It was better in theory than
in reality, I learned

Sign up to vote on this title
UsefulNot useful