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Monday, 19 March 2001

MAN : I knew I was fucked when the pukeko I was walking past cleared its throat and said hello, got any bread?
The cheeky fuck. Youd think I was made of the stuff.
He went on: Im a bit partial to whole grain, I am
Really? Like I could give two shits. I dont need to be accosted by a protected species on my way to work. So I said,
all cocky like: Why should I give you any thing. Whatve you done for me lately?
And it turns its head to regard me with its other eye and it says all cool like: You owe me needlefuck, now pony
up
In some ways the little bastard is right. Im the oppressor. My ancestors stole land from its ancestors. Why should
we pay them? Theyre just a bunch of fucking birds, you know.
Well they were till some smart cunt decided that it would be ... fuck-knows what it would be- smart, bright, nice,
fun, - it honestly doesnt fucking matter. Were fucked all the same. Im no technician, no fucking egghead. But here
it is: A virus that attacks the DNA strands and makes subtle changes in the genome. As each generation is born,
grows, fucks and multiplies the effects of this virus is felt. Brain functions change, tongue muscles mutate, vocal
mechanisms lengthen and strengthen. Sentience. What made humans king of the hill is now available to any creature
that fucks, eats or roots in shit. Do you understand? Six generations of mice and the latest are in university learning
particle physics. Two months and thats all she wrote.