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Dylan Allison

The Detrimental Effects of Bullying

Inquiry: Why do people cause physical/mental harm to others?
Proposed thesis: Bullying is becoming a huge problem, it causes so much more than
mental harm, and its not only happening at school.
Bakalar, Nicholas. "Being Bullied Is Bad for Your Health. New York Times,12,May2014 n.d. Web. 25 Feb.
This article is a couple of years old now but I do not think that it would make a
difference in this case because what is discovered in the research would not
change in a couple of years. Nicholas makes his argument here by writing an
article about a research done by scientists that found that being bullied actually
leads to bad health. This is because it raises a fluid in your blood called C-reactive
protein (CPR) and it raises your risk for heart disease and many others. The weird
thing they found is that the ones doing the bullying have a low count of CRP.
Even lower than that of kids that have nothing to do with bullying at all. They
also found that the social standings of the kids that are being bullied are closely
related to children that experience physical abuse at home. This article proves that
bullying causes more than just mental harm. We all know that a kid being beat up
would cause physical harm but would you think that it could lead to a child
having heart problems or forming a disease? Someone might be able to mature
and get over the hurtful words or things that were said to them but they would not
be able to get rid of a disease they have gotten from being bullied. It is something
that they would have to live with for the rest of their lives.

Cloud, John. "When Bullying Turns Deadly: Can It Be Stopped?" Time. Time Inc., 24
Oct. 2010. Web. 25 Feb. 2016.
This was published in 2010 and I think that this does not take away from the
credibility because bullying is still deadly and causes the death of many people. In
this article Cloud supports his title by giving examples of kids that have killed
themselves due to bullying. Going deeper into the topic, he gives specific reasons
that they committed suicide. The big one was people being bullied because of
sexual interests. A specific example that hits the hardest is that of Seth Walsh. He
was thirteen years old when he hung himself in his own back yard. His bullying
began when he was in fourth grade, and by seventh he was afraid to walk home
from school. This eventually led to him hanging himself and his mother finding
him still barely alive. Ultimately after being on life support for nine days he
passed away. Mental harm left this young boy and many others to their death.
Mental harm can do so much that a person begins thinking that life is worth living
anymore. These suicides showing that it has taken a turn for the worse.
Hertzog, Jodi L., Tammy Harpel, and Rochelle Rowley. "Is It Bullying, Teen Dating
Violence, or Both? Student, School Staff, and Parent Perceptions." Proxy Login
University Libraries - USC. N.p., n.d. Web. 25 Feb. 2016.
The main thing they want to see here is how the views that people have on what
behaviors cause bulling, teen dating violence (TDV), or both.. They ran an
experiment and found that the views were different between the groups they
surveyed. It was written in 2015 so it is recent data on the subject and is another

one of my peer-reviewed sources so it is a credible source. It also adds to my

argument that bullying is becoming a huge problem because it is expanding its
boards. I am saying this because I did not even know that teen-dating violence
was a thing, but it is. They are not bias because they are presenting facts for an
audience and dont put personal opinions into the research or let it change their
findings. Adding to my argument as well is the fact that it is not just in schools
because dating obviously does not only partake in school.
Knopf, Alison. "Bullying, in Teen Sports and Elsewhere, Requires Parent
Intervention." N.p., n.d. Web. 25 Feb. 2016.
This source tells of bullying within sports that teens partake in.; they have found
that the mail reason that it takes place is jealousy. One thing I found interesting is
that they say that it can take place in sports that are solo sports like figure skating.
There are many ways that it takes place and they do it to get in the head of the
other person. It does not give a specific time that it was written but that does not
matter because I dont think time would change this. It is a credible source
because it is peer reviewed and she i
Is the managing editor for The Brown University Child. She does not seem to be
bias but she could possibly be because she only talks about one thing. The reason
why I say she is probably not is because there isnt really another side to this
story. This supports my argument because this directly proves that it outside of
school. It even affects the lives of people in the sports they like to participate in.
Romero, Andrea J., Christine Bracamonte Wiggs, Celina Valencia, and Sheri Bauman.
"Latina Teen Suicide and Bullying." Proxy Login - University Libraries - USC.
N.p., n.d. Web. 25 Feb. 2016.

This source talks about how a Latina teen is more likely to have symptoms of
depression and other things related to bullying. I would like to look at another part
of this study where it shows the different types of bullying that has been going on
with the teens. It talks about the percentage of bullying at school versus cyber
bullying. It clearly shows a rise in the cyber bullying side of this. This helps my
argument because it means that it is happening in more places than just at school.
This is a credible source because it is a peer-reviewed paper. The authors do not
seem bias to me because they are just telling facts about the study. This helps me
because it shows that cyber bullying is one main reason for the bad effects on
teens. It also shows how bullying is becoming a big problem because of the great
percentage that are thinking about committing suicide.

Shireen, Farhat, Himani Janapana, Sanila Rehmatullah, Hoor Temuri, and Fatima Azim.
"Trauma Experience of Youngsters and Teens: A Key Issue in Suicidal Behavior
among Victims of Bullying?" N.p., n.d. Web. 25 Feb. 2016.
This source was done in 2014 so it is fairly recent it is also one of my peered
reviewed sources, this means that it credible for my research. This talks about
research done that basically sees the connection between bullying and suicides.
One of the things they found is that the risk of suicide attempts are higher in girls
other than boys. They have also shown that the depression and feelings of their
being no hope of happiness are drawn directly from bullying and are linked to
suicides. This shows that bullying is a great problem and needs to be fixed. I do

not believe that the authors here are bias because they are simply talking about
scientifically proven things.
I think you did a really great job with this essay. You made sure to give information on
why your sources were credible. To make these statements a little bit stronger I would
consider giving a sentence or two on where you found these articles (online library
database, google) and including whether or not it is a peer reviewed journal! I also
changed some of the formatting of your essay so your paper would look like the example
that was on blackboard. Overall, the main thing I would change would be to add
quotations throughout your summary of each source. I would also give a sentence,
maybe at the end of each paragraph, explaining how this source is useful to your final
essay and where you plan on using it within your final paper. I think for your essay, if
you narrow in your inquiry question to reflect where specifically bullying occurs and
why, you will tie in readers even more to your topic. I think this because I was very
intrigued when reading your source analysis of the article talking about bullying in solo
sports (which is a very specific place bullying occurs).