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relationship problems. Jill is very stressed about her work and financial situation. This seems to be the source of their tension. Joe can contribute to improving his relationship with her by engaging in active listening. Joe seems to be sloughing off Jill’s issues instead of listening to her and showing his concern for her life issues. He may be giving her some solutions to the problems, but he is not doing so in a compassionate or thoughtful way. Jill seems to perceive Joe’s carelessness as being obstructionist. This would allow for her failure to engage in activities in her usual manner. Joe can be an active listener by asking questions of Jill which are open ended. She can then provide answers that will give him insight into her feelings of stress. He cannot assume that he will be able to understand what she is trying to tell him if he continues to shut her down when she talks about her problems. Jill can contribute to resolution in this scenario by being open to communicating with Joe. The text tells us that asking the other person for permission to discuss their issues is a means of opening up communication. The two of them can use this as a means of creating a more open atmosphere between them. This may make it easier for Joe to do his part as an active listener. This would make the discussion an opportunity instead of a burden on him. It does not matter which issues they are trying to discuss. Opening up communications on a positive note will help them talk about and resolve issues in their sex life, their social life and their professional life. If they find they cannot resolve these issues together then they may choose to enter couples therapy as a means of giving them access to better communication tools. DQ 2 Attractiveness is founded in three components. These are attitude, physical attraction and reciprocity. Attitude is attractive because we are more naturally inclined to communicate with those of like attitude. Physical appearance is a cornerstone of physical attraction. Reciprocity indicates that the other person communicates with us in a supportive way. I would say that the main element in attraction is physical attraction. We are usually attracted to someone initially based on their appearance. This induces us to want to know more about this individual and to pursue them to learn more about them. I think that physical attraction acts as the foundation for many relationships. I know that confidence, humor and intelligence can play into the development of new relationships as well. Other elements of attractiveness contribute to a longer lasting and better developed relationship. The stage of the relationship gives an idea of the depth of the impact of the other components. I believe that physical attraction is the basis of most
relationships and that attitude and reciprocity contribute to the development of more lasting relationships. .