The Royal Tenenbaums by Wes Anderson & Owen Wilson


INSERT: A first edition copy of The Royal Tenenbaums. On the dust jacket there is an illustration of a creamcolored note card that looks like a wedding invitation. title of the book is engraved on the card. The next page says “Chapter One.” NARRATOR (V.O.) Royal Tenenbaum bought the house on Archer Avenue in the winter of his thirty-fifth year. CUT TO: A five-story limestone townhouse. A forty-three-year-old man in a raincoat rings the front doorbell. He is Royal. NARRATOR (CONT’D) Over the next decade, he and his wife had three children and then they separated. INT. DINING ROOM. DAY. He is surrounded by The

Royal sits at the head of a long table. his children.

Chas is twelve, with curly hair, dressed in a black suit and tie. Margot is ten, with a barrette in her hair, wearing a knitted LaCoste dress and penny loafers. Richie is eight, with long hair, parted on the side, dressed in a Bjorn Borgstyle tennis outfit with a headband. Chas wears a blank expression, Margot looks as if she is about to cry, and Richie has tears all over his face. MARGOT Are you getting divorced? ROYAL (gently) At the moment, no. good.

But it doesn’t look

RICHIE Do you still love us? ROYAL Of course, I do. CHAS (pointedly) Do you still love Mom?


2. CONTINUED: ROYAL Very much. But she asked me to leave, and I had to respect her position on the matter. MARGOT Was it our fault? ROYAL (long pause) No. Obviously, we had to make certain sacrifices as a result of having children, but no. Lord, no. RICHIE Why’d she ask you to leave? ROYAL (sadly) I don’t really know any more. Maybe I wasn’t as true to her as I could’ve been. CHAS Well, she says -ROYAL Let’s not rehash it, Chassie. An Indian man with salt-and-pepper hair, dressed in pink pants, a white shirt and a white apron, comes in from the kitchen with a Martini on a tray. He is Pagoda. NARRATOR (V.O.) They were never legally divorced. Pagoda hands Royal the Martini. ROYAL Thanks, Pagoda. INT. HALLWAY. DAY.

A gallery of the children’s art, done mostly in crayon, but with beautiful frames and careful lighting. The subject matter includes: spaceships, wild animals, sailboats, motorcycles, and war scenes with tanks and paratroopers. A stuffed and mounted boar’s head with its teeth bared hangs in the stairwell. A label on it says “Wild Javelina, Andes Mountains.” Under the stairs there is a telephone room the size of a closet. Old messages are tacked to the walls, and the children’s heights are marked on the door frame. A thirty-three-year-old woman with a scarf around her neck and sunglasses on top of her head talks on a rotary telephone. She is Etheline. (CONTINUED)

3. CONTINUED: Richie sits on her lap reading an Atlas of the World. Margot sits on a foot-stool reading The Cherry Orchard. Chas stands in the doorway with a slip of blue paper in his hand. NARRATOR (V.O.) Etheline Tenenbaum kept the house and raised the children, and their education was her highest priority. Etheline says into the telephone: ETHELINE I’ll hold, thank you. CHAS I need $187. ETHELINE (pause) Write yourself a check. Chas hands Etheline the slip of blue paper. INSERT: A cheque made out in the amount of $187. Etheline signs it. CUT TO: Chas taking back the cheque. telephone: Bene. Si. Etheline says into the

ETHELINE (CONT’D) Grazie mille.

Etheline hangs up. There is a schedule of activities -guitar, ballet, yoga, scuba-diving -- written on a chalkboard behind her and divided into columns labelled Chas, Richie and Margot. She changes an Italian lesson from 4:30 to 5:30. NARRATOR (V.O.) She wrote a book on the subject. INSERT: A copy of Etheline Tenenbaum’s book, Family of Geniuses. On the dust jacket there is a photograph of the three children conducting a press conference in a room crowded with journalists. It appears to have been published in the late seventies. CUT TO: The press conference. Chas points to a reporter.

CHAS The gentleman in the blue cardigan, please. (CONTINUED)

4. CONTINUED: (2) REPORTER I have a two-part question. CHAS DAY.

Thank you. Go ahead. INT. CHAS’ BEDROOM.

Chas’ room looks like a businessman’s office, except it is very small and has bunk beds. There is a desk with an Apple II computer and an electric coffee pot on it. There is a water cooler in the corner, with a paper cup dispenser. Chas stands talking on the telephone while Etheline brings in his lunch on a tray. NARRATOR (V.O.) Chas Tenenbaum had, since elementary school, taken most of his meals in his room, standing up at his desk with a cup of coffee, to save time. On a shelf in an alcove there are ten cages connected together by plastic tubes. White mice with tiny black spots all over them race around outside the cages. Chas feeds one of them a drop of blue liquid from a test tube. NARRATOR (CONT’D) In the sixth grade, he went into business, breeding dalmation mice, which he sold to a pet shop in Little Tokyo. There are twenty-five pinstriped suits in boys’ size twelve and an electric tie rack hanging in the closet. Chas pushes a button on the tie rack and the ties glide along a track. NARRATOR (CONT’D) He started buying real estate in his early teens and seemed to have an almost preternatural understanding of international finance. There are a small weightlifting bench and punchbag in the corner. There is a set of exercise charts neatly drawn with felt-tip pen tacked on the wall. Chas bench-presses about fifty pounds on a small barbell. NARRATOR (CONT’D) He negotiated the purchase of his father’s summer house on Eagle’s Island. EXT. BACKYARD. DAY.

A house in the country. Chas crouches in the bushes with a BB gun. Across the lawn, he sees two younger boys with BB guns drop down from a tree. (CONTINUED)

5. CONTINUED: One of the boys is Richie, and the other has nearly-white blond hair. He is Eli. He wears Apache warpaint. Chas gets Richie in his sights. ROYAL Hold it, Chassie. Chas freezes. He looks up and sees Royal watching from the roof with a BB gun trained on him. Royal is dressed in khaki pants, sunglasses and no shirt. CHAS What are you doing? ROYAL (hesitates) There are no teams. Royal fires. Chas screams and fires back as Royal scrambles away, laughing. NARRATOR (V.O.) The BB was still lodged between two knuckles in Chas’ left hand. INT. MARGOT’S BEDROOM. DAY. You’re on my team!

The walls of Margot’s room are red, with little running zebras painted all over them. There is a collection of African masks hanging in the corner. Margot sits at a small metal stand, typing on an IBM typewriter. NARRATOR (V.O.) Margot Tenenbaum was adopted at the age of two. Her father had always noted this when introducing her. CUT TO: A cocktail party. Royal introduces Margot to a group of elderly men in black tie. ROYAL This is my adopted daughter, Margot Tenenbaum. Margot nods politely. CUT TO: A wall filled with bookshelves. There are thousands of books of plays. Margot takes out a copy of The Iceman Cometh. NARRATOR (V.O.) She was a playwright and won a Braverman Grant of fifty-thousand dollars in the ninth grade. (CONTINUED)

I didn’t. Richie sits on the edge of his bed. There are a chemistry set.6. Eli is at the end of the line. Margot carries a small red suitcase. He stops and stares at Margot and Richie. NARRATOR (V. Richie’s room is in the attic. INSERT: A pair of knitted gloves. Margot places a tiny canoe beneath a palm tree. NARRATOR (CONT’D) She and her brother Richie ran away from home one winter and camped out in the African Wing of the Public Archives. Eli.) Four years later. DAY. a drum set and a long shelf filled with tennis trophies. Hi. EXT. One finger has been clipped off at the middle knuckle and is being sewn up.O. CUT TO: Richie and Margot sharing a Boy Scout sleeping bag on a bench in a gallery of wildlife dioramas in a darkened museum. INT. NARRATOR (V. Richie has on a small backpack with a sleeping bag attached to it. Richie is asleep. A single-file line of students in Catholic school uniforms goes past them following a museum guide. CONTINUED: There is a mock-up of a stage set for a play that appears to have taken place in a network of tree houses on a tropical island.) Richie Tenenbaum had been a champion tennis player since the third grade. she disappeared alone for almost two weeks and came back with half a finger missing. Richie and Margot sit on a bench in front of a large Gothic building. (CONTINUED) . RICHIE’S BEDROOM. MARGOT No. They both look extremely dishevelled and tired. RICHIE ELI You said I could run away. DAY. MUSEUM. And don’t tell anybody you saw us.O. too. Margot reads a book about sharks by the light of a flashlight.

NARRATOR (CONT’D) He kept a studio in the corner of the ballroom but had failed to develop as a painter. Richie parks a little Maserati next to a dune buggy. Richie throws in a dollar. CUT TO: The second floor of the Tenenbaum house. . NARRATOR (CONT’D) On weekends. DAY.7. STREET. Margot sits alone in the next. Royal took him on outings around the city. Royal yells along with the others: Vamanos! ROYAL Andale! Royal throws a fifty-dollar bill into a pile of money on the sidewalk.S. There is a slightly run-down thirty-five-story apartment building across the street. There is a ham radio set in the corner of the room. CONTINUED: There are thousands of Matchbox cars arranged on every available inch of space on tables. Chas sits alone in one window. There is a map of the world on the wall. One corner is filled with seventeen almost identical portraits of Margot looking over the top of a book with an irritated expression. vicious-looking pit bulls with scars all over them snarl at each other.O. NARRATOR (CONT’D) He turned pro at seventeen and won the U. sharing a bag of peanuts and laughing. They both watch as Royal and Richie get out of a gypsy cab in front of the house. CUT TO: A ballroom with vaulted ceilings and a giant chandelier on the top floor of the house. Royal and Richie stand among a group of Puerto Rican men as two large. EXT. Richie sits at the console wearing a set of headphones. Etheline helps Richie hang a new portrait among the others. desks and window sills. Nationals three years in a row. NARRATOR (V. Eli sits alone in a window.) These invitations were never extended to anyone else. with colored pins stuck in different cities.

Royal sits at a table with them. Royal rings the front doorbell. NARRATOR (V. holidays.) Richie’s best friend Eli Cash lived with his aunt in a building across the street. There are twenty eleven-year-olds wearing party hats. NARRATOR (V.O.O.) He was a regular fixture at family gatherings. Chas and Richie are in costumes. EXT. DAY. Dad? ROYAL It didn’t seem believable to me. NARRATOR (V. STREET.8. Margot. He carries a small package wrapped in red-and-pinkstriped paper with a white ribbon on it. There are strings of colored lights glowing around the front door and white paper bags with candles in them on the steps. Eli finishes making his bed and folds it into the couch. CUT TO: The Tenenbaum house at night. slippers and a bathrobe. BALLROOM. CHAS What’d you think. Eli walks up the front steps of the Tenenbaum house and rings the doorbell. He wears a set of house keys on a string around his neck.O. He is dressed in pajamas. An elderly woman works at a sewing machine in the next room. A two-room apartment with a crucifix on the wall. Chas is a bear and Richie is a leopard. Margot is a zebra. INT. DAY. Pagoda opens the door. NIGHT. There is a small stage-set across the room for a play that appears to have taken place on a ship. drinking a glass of whiskey. mornings before school and most afternoons. INT. (CONTINUED) .) They had agreed to invite their father to the party. Eli is dressed in pajamas. NARRATOR (CONT’D) The three Tenenbaum children performed Margot’s first play on the night of her eleventh birthday. He lets Eli inside. APARTMENT.

Mordecai.9. RICHIE Go. Etheline blows out the candles. NARRATOR (V. Don’t get mad. carefully removes the falcon’s hood. and feeds him some sardines from a tin. The falcon has a hood over its eyes. She looks furious. That’s just The lights go down. Richie carries the falcon on his arm to the edge of the roof.O. ROYAL Sweetie. There is a large antenna for Richie’s ham radio and a wooden coop with a falcon in it. She puts Royal’s aside and sets it in front of him.) In fact. (CONTINUED) . CONTINUED: Chas looks at Margot. EXT. Royal shakes his head. Royal looks across the room. virtually all memory of the brilliance of the young Tenenbaums had been erased by two decades of betrayal. Pagoda stands at the light switch. Everyone begins to sing “Happy Birthday. DAY.” Margot walks out of the room. Margot quickly collects her unopened presents from the table. everyone. MARGOT Goodnight. and the singing disintegrates. NARRATOR He had not been invited to any of their parties since. Richie opens the coop. She is silent. Royal says to Eli: Do you ROYAL (CONT’D) Why are you wearing pajamas? live here? RICHIE He has permission to sleep over. one man’s opinion. Etheline stands in the doorway with a birthday cake on a tray. The candles are lit. ROOF. CHAS Did you think the characters were -ROYAL What characters? It was just a bunch of little kids dressed in animal costumes. failure and disaster.

She is thirty-four. He has a full. MONTAGE: (The names of each of our characters and the names of the actors playing them appear over the following shots. black hair with one silver streak that runs through it. She wears a pink slip and a gold locket. He is getting a facial. A woman in a white apron lifts off the towel. Margot Tenenbaum is at a hairdresser’s with three people working on her at once. They are eight and ten. She has one fake finger made of wood. gray beard and round glasses. and she blows a puff of smoke as the hair dryer is lowered onto her head. CONTINUED: The falcon spreads its wings and lunges into the sky.) Royal Tenenbaum sits in a chair in his hotel suite with no shirt on and a towel wrapped around his face. and there are strips of blue cellophane covering his face. The wall behind her is filled with portraits of tribesmen and native warriors from around the world. Etheline Tenenbaum draws eyeliner around her eyes in the dressing mirror. A tailor pulls at the hem of the jacket and sticks pins in the sleeves. Steam fills the air. He puts it on at an angle and stares at himself. Eli picks out a sandwich. but with no blades in their razors. white at the temples. worn very long in the back. He puts the tape recorder back on the sink and starts brushing his teeth again. Royal lights a cigarette at the end of a three-inch holder. He is now sixty-six. Chas Tenenbaum shaves in the locker room of a boxing gym. The tailor’s helper brings Eli a cup of tea and some cucumber sandwiches.10. Clair brushes his teeth with an electric toothbrush in a very small. She holds an open copy of a book of plays by George Bernard Shaw. and excitedly dictates something into it. Her hair is being dyed. (CONTINUED) . A second helper hands him a short-brimmed Stetson cowboy hat. She holds up a pair of prescription sunglasses and looks at herself. The woman quickly peels them away and begins to massage his temples. He stops suddenly. She is fifty-five and has long. and Royal looks in the mirror. They are also shaving. Ari and Uzi Tenenbaum are on either side of him. and he is dressed in red silk pajamas with white piping. She lowers them and does her lipstick. and there are little clamps and bits of foil twisted into it. Eli Cash is in the fitting room of a clothing store having a white buckskin jacket with fringe taken in. white-tiled bathroom. with grey hair. She is smoking a cigarette. picks up a tape recorder off the edge of the sink. All three have extremely curly black hair. He is thirty-six and in top fighting condition. Releigh St.

The manager hands Royal the piece of paper. fifty-six years old. parted on the side. and a beard. MANAGER I’ve been instructed to refuse any further charges on your room account and to direct you in writing to please vacate the premises by the end of the month. There is a set of Encyclopedia Britannica. ROYAL What about Sing-Sang? hundred. He points it at his reflection. I owe her a Royal points to The manager looks to the masseuse. Royal lies on his stomach on a massage table getting a massage from a young Asian woman. The ocean goes by at a fast clip in the porthole behind him.” Royal’s suite at the Lindbergh Palace Hotel. He takes out a little camera. INSERT: Page 22 of The Royal Tenenbaums. INSERT: (CONTINUED) .) Royal had lived in the Lindbergh Palace Hotel for twenty-two years. the masseuse. a headband. There is a hand-lettered sign regarding trash and recycling taped to the wall behind him.11. The manager of the hotel stands in front of Royal with a piece of paper in his hand. with grey hair and a moustache. and penny loafers. the Landlord. He puts the camera back into his pocket and goes out the door. with long hair. A towel on the dresser says The Cote d’Ivoire in red stitching. DAY. an exercise bicycle and a Xerox machine. CONTINUED: (2) Henry Sherman stands in front of a mirrored wall in a vestibule of his building. and takes a picture of himself. in red ink. He wears a khaki suit. It says “Chapter Two. He is thirty-two. He is a tall black man. Richie Tenenbaum looks at himself in the mirror in his stateroom on board an ocean liner. There are shelves full of law books and hundreds of spy novels in stacks on the floor. smiles sadly. He wears a doublebreasted navy blazer. It is signed H. HOTEL ROOM. Sherman. NARRATOR (V.O. INT. He carefully folds a checkered handkerchief and tucks it into his breast pocket. underneath a row of mailboxes. a striped tennis shirt.

There is a mist outside the window. and a crew of technicians in white uniforms. He lights a cigarette. The radio operator finishes typing a message into a keyboard and looks up to Richie.) He was a prominent litigator until the mid-eighties. It MANAGER Can you pay her in cash? Royal shakes his head. NARRATOR (CONT’D) No one in his family had spoken to him in three years. RICHIE Read it back to me so far. She does not appear to understand English.O. The radio operator looks to Richie. when he was disbarred and briefly imprisoned. short-wave radios. begins: Dear Mr. INT. NARRATOR (V. and I think I’m in love with Margot. RADIO OPERATOR Dear Eli. RICHIE New paragraph. DAY. CUT TO: Royal standing in the window looking out at the falling snow as Sing-Sang folds up the massage table behind him. we have no -CUT TO: The masseuse. CONTINUED: A letter typed on Lindbergh Palace Hotel stationary. (CONTINUED) Richie nods. RADIO ROOM. . Pietro. In light of your continuing failure to remit any form of payment. There are computer terminals. The manager hesitates. I’ve never been more lonely in my life. I’m in the middle of the ocean.12. maps on the walls. The radio room on board the Cote d’Ivoire. and an oil tanker in the distance. I haven’t left my room in four days. Tenenbaum.

and there are tears all over his face. Eli looks up.) Richie had retired from professional tennis at twenty-six. five oceans. He wears no shoes and only one sock.13. The recent publication of his second novel -(CONTINUED) . He closes his book. He wraps a scarf around his neck and goes out the door. Richie. A telegram marked “Ship to Shore” is tucked into his coat pocket. The audience applauds NARRATOR (V. the Amazon and the Nile. NARRATOR (V. LIBRARY.) For the past year he had been traveling alone on an ocean liner called the Cote d’Ivoire and had seen both poles. “Tenenbaum suffers midmatch nervous collapse in the semis at Windswept Fields. A caption across the page says “Meltdown!” And. Eli stands at a podium reading from a book to a crowded audience. INSERT: A copy of the Sporting Press magazine.” CUT TO: Richie dictating to the radio operator. His voice is quietly dramatic. End of letter. On the cover. ELI The crickets and the rust-beetles scuttled among the nettles of the sagethicket. Richie signs a slip of paper and hands it to the radio operator. INT. he whispered. and threw the busted leather flintscraw over the loose weave of the saddlecock. amigos. RICHIE Your friend. in smaller letters. there is a photograph of Richie standing at the baseline of a tennis court. His last match had been widely discussed in the media. NARRATOR (V. And they rode on in the friscalating dusklight. CONTINUED: Richie takes a sip of a Bloody Mary. uproariously. The stands behind him are filled with confused fans.) Eli was an assistant professor of English Literature at Brooks College. NIGHT.O. Vamanos.O.O.

NARRATOR (V. On the dust jacket there is an illustration of an Indian in warpaint with a long. Old Custer. bloody knife clasped between his teeth and a yellow scalp hanging from his hand. Margot sits Indian-style on the counter painting her toenails red and talking on the telephone. ELI Well. The bathroom of Margot’s and Raleigh’s apartment. LOBBY. Eli walks among the card catalogues surrounded by a crowd of admirers.) -. He unfolds a newspaper clipping and looks at it while he waits. What this book presupposes is: (tentatively) maybe he didn’t? Eli shrugs and smiles. reviewer make the point of someone’s not a genius? I think I’m especially not a Isn’t that -Why would a saying mean. INT. everyone knows Custer died at Little Bighorn. He scribbles his name on it and hands it back without looking. and she has a towel wrapped around her. (CONTINUED) .O. CUT TO: Eli standing near the circulation desk with a group of professors drinking cocktails.had earned him a sudden. BATHROOM. do you genius? Someone gives Eli a book to sign. He says sadly: ELI (CONT’D) You didn’t even have to think about it.14. CONTINUED: INSERT: A copy of Eli Cash’s latest book. NIGHT. There are cotton balls between her toes. NIGHT. CUT TO: Eli placing a call from a pay phone in the lobby. did you? INT. unexpected literary celebrity. He says suddenly into the receiver: ELI (CONT’D) Let me ask you something.

please? Margot puts out her cigarette. The Kasawa stares at him curiously.dressed in a Speedo. She waves the smoke away. there is a photograph of Raleigh -. CONTINUED: Hot water runs full blast in the bathtub. I just don’t use that word lightly. with goggles on top of his head -. and sprays perfume into the air with an atomizer. A little black-andwhite television set is tuned in to the six o’clock news with the sound turned off. Margot hangs up the telephone. Margot answers without taking the cigarette out of her mouth. MARGOT (CONT’D) I have to go. Margot whispers into the telephone: MARGOT Well. He seems worried and intimidated.O. There is knock on the door. He is wearing red pajamas and a camel’s-hair bathrobe. RALEIGH How are you. She reaches over and unlocks the door with her foot. Margot? RALEIGH There is another knock. Raleigh has an English accent with a lisp.15. my darling? (CONTINUED) . Raleigh cracks open the door and looks inside. NARRATOR (V. Margot takes a drag of a cigarette balanced at the edge of the sink. On the dust jacket. standing next to a Kasawa. Uh-huh? MARGOT RALEIGH May I come in.on a beach. turns on a little electric fan. The Peculiar Neurodegenerative Inhabitants of the Kazawa Atoll. CUT TO: Raleigh looking in the bathroom doorway. Clair’s latest book. INSERT: A copy of Raleigh St. Eli. Clair. Margot does not look up.) Margot was married to the writer and neurologist Raleigh St.

thank you. Margot blows on her toenails. your dinner? MARGOT No. DAY. A younger Margot stands behind them partly hidden in the door frame. He goes out suddenly and closes the door. She is dressed in a string bikini. She takes it out and lights it. Margot opens a box of Q-Tips. STUDIO. Margot taps her fingers on the counter. NARRATOR (CONT’D) Nor were they aware of her first marriage and divorce to a recording artist in Jamaica. thank you. INSERT: A remaindered copy of Desmond Winston Manchester XI’s LP record Dynamite Stick. RALEIGH You must eat something. NARRATOR (CONT’D) She kept a private studio in Mockingbird Heights under the name Helen Scott. She looks to Raleigh. CONTINUED: (2) MARGOT Fine. The wooden one makes a clicking sound. There is a cigarette hidden inside. The titles include: Static Electricity. which she had been since the age of twelve. There are posters for several of Margot’s plays leaning against the walls. Margot reaches over with her foot and locks it. On the sleeve there is a photograph of five Rastafarians standing in front of a metal shack. For example. Raleigh hesitates. Erotic Transference and Nakedness Tonight.) She had not completed a play in seven years.) She was known for her extreme secrecy. NARRATOR (V.O. none of the Tenenbaums knew she was a smoker. NARRATOR (V. INT. .O.16. Shall I make A small room with one wooden chair and a metal stand with an IBM electric typewriter on it.

Make yours look like mine. He wears Henry Aaron-style flip-up sunglasses.) Raleigh’s next book was on the subject of a condition he called Heinsbergen’s Syndrome. The boy has an earphone in his ear. Raleigh and Dudley both have a set of building blocks in front of them. Done. with a highly acute sense of hearing. dyslexia and color-blindness. Raleigh says into his tape recorder: RALEIGH Seventeen October. Third examination of Dudley Heinsbergen. Raleigh is dressed in a turtleneck shirt and a corduroy blazer with suede patches on the elbows. across from a fifteen-year-old boy in a plaid fishing hat with “Dudley” stitched across the front. RALEIGH’S LABORATORY.17. DAY. Raleigh sits at a table. RALEIGH My goodness. bizarre. Dudley stands on the far side of the room misspelling words on a chalkboard. How interesting.O. Raleigh’s basement. Dudley’s are strewn out randomly. A cardboard screen stands in between the two sets of blocks. Raleigh whispers into his tape recorder: RALEIGH (CONT’D) Dudley suffers from a rare disorder combining the symptoms of amnesia. moving his blocks around slowly. Dudley. Dudley sets to work. How CUT TO: Raleigh sitting in a corner. RALEIGH (CONT’D) All right. Dudley finishes arranging his blocks into the shape of a lopsided octagon with branches coming out of it. . NARRATOR (V. Raleigh lifts the cardboard screen and looks to Dudley. DUDLEY He shakes his head. (CONTINUED) Raleigh begins to laugh quietly. INT. Raleigh’s are arranged in the shape of a symmetrical cross.

Chas runs around the room.O. Ari presses the button for the elevator and waits. Ari and Uzi are sound asleep in their bunk beds. His expression is blank. INT. he holds a fishing lantern. He yells at the top of his lungs: CHAS Fire alarm! Ari! alive! Uzi! Let’s go! Look Ari bolts out of the top bunk. Rachael. Chas yells to Ari: Uzi has on a pajama top (CONTINUED) . NIGHT. In the other hand. He looks to Uzi. Uzi sits up. CHAS (CONT’D) Let’s go! NIGHT. He puts on a pair of cleats and grabs the turtle out of the fish tank. NARRATOR (V. Ari’s and Uzi’s bedroom. which begins blinking rapidly in a strobe effect. There is a turtle in a fish tank in the corner. The apartment is extremely large and spare. In one hand. He is shirtless and has on pajama bottoms. There are two fire extinguishers and a large firstaid kit mounted on the wall. which blasts a recording of a police siren at full volume. was killed in a plane crash the previous summer. CHAS’ APARTMENT. It is perfectly neat and organized like a military barracks. and underwear. tipping over chairs and blasting the tape recorder. There are night lights in every socket. he holds a small tape recorder.) Chas’ wife. RALEIGH I’m afraid you are. Chas and Uzi rush into the hallway. He screams: Uzi! INT. It looks like a museum.18. HALLWAY. CONTINUED: Dudley turns around suddenly and frowns. He presses play on the tape recorder. He turns on the lantern. He looks half asleep. am I? Raleigh looks to Dudley. He hesitates. RALEIGH (CONT’D) There is also evidence of -DUDLEY I’m not color-blind. Chas stands in the doorway.

It stops. Ari and Uzi. We’re all dead. Ari and Uzi and their mother stand in front of a small plane outside a hangar. CONTINUED: CHAS No elevators! There’s a fire! INT. were also on the flight and survived. The lantern is still blinking. CHAS Four minutes and forty-eight seconds. The boys wear camp shorts and no shirts. looking up at the building. BATHROOM.19. Chas picks up Uzi. The mother has on sunglasses with a scarf tied over her hair. (CONTINUED) . SIDEWALK. The tape recorder has been turned off. Chas.) Chas and their two sons. There is a beagle looking out of the window of the plane. He looks very old and has white fur around his eyes. STAIRWELL. Chas turns off the lantern and presses stop on his stopwatch. Uzi starts to cry. INSERT: A slide projected onto a screen. The street is deserted. The wind blows her dress sideways. CUT TO: A dog’s cage upside down in the desert surrounded by scraps of metal and clothing. as did their dog.O. and she is laughing. Burned to a crisp. His breathing is wheezy. INT. EXT. NIGHT. NARRATOR (V. They race down the stairs. NIGHT. who was discovered in his cage several thousand yards from the crash site. Ari and Uzi stand on the sidewalk. A cloud of smoke billows in the distance. UZI What about Buckley? CHAS You forgot him. The beagle is asleep next to the bathtub on a little bed with “Buckley” written on it. NIGHT. Uzi is doing a karate stance. Chas’ siren can be heard in the distance outside the window.

HENRY Apropos of my question re: I-40 slash I9 adjustments. peeling potatoes. A human skeleton hangs on a stand in the corner.O.20. The back doors are open on to the garden. Henry Sherman. Henry stands up.O. CHAS It doesn’t matter.O. He seems very nervous. He looks disoriented and weak. he had become increasingly concerned with their safety. CONTINUED: Chas shakes his head. UZI We left Buckley. Etheline looks up NARRATOR (V. The doorman watches uneasily from the lobby. INSERT: (CONTINUED) . Chas rubs his eyes and his temples. His hair is now white. Ari and Uzi look scared.) She taught bridge class twice a week with her friend and business manager.) Etheline became an archaeologist and had overseen excavations for the Department of Housing and the Transit Authority. NARRATOR (V. listening to a Walkman with headphones. at him curiously. There are stacks of National Geographics on the floor. Uzi is still crying. There are shelves full of hundreds of bones and bits of pottery with little numbers painted on them. He is working on her taxes. Pagoda sits on a bench outside. DAY. INT. Etheline is at her desk studying an arrowhead while Henry sits next to her. He says quietly: The walls of Etheline’s study are filled with pre-Columbian art and primitive tools and weapons. NARRATOR (V. Chas sits down on the sidewalk. ETHELINE’S STUDY.) Over the last six months.

ETHELINE What do you mean? HENRY I mean for tax purposes. HENRY (CONT’D) I love you. He takes off one ear of his headphones.) Since her separation from her husband.21. Henry nods calmly. in light of the circumstances. NARRATOR (V. I didn’t. ETHELINE (pause) But I thought it was -Etheline? Yes? HENRY ETHELINE HENRY Will you marry me? Pagoda stops peeling the potatoes.O. (CONTINUED) . Accounting for Everything. Did you already know that? ETHELINE No. caption at the top of the cover says “A Guide to Personal Finance. CONTINUED: A copy of Henry Sherman’s book. HENRY It would probably be advantageous for your marital status to be legally established as single.” It appears to have been published in the late sixties. He checks the elevation with a compass. Etheline puts on her prescription sunglasses. He wears a hooded fur coat and has ice frozen into his beard. she had had many suitors -MONTAGE: A large man stands on a glacier in Antarctica with penguins behind him. A title identifies him as Neville Smythe-Dorleac. A CUT TO: Henry looking down at Etheline.

PAGODA Hello. He smokes a cigarette. and a safety pin holds his glasses together. He has two bandaged shaving cuts. Henry. CONTINUED: (2) An Asian man in a tweed suit and large. CUT TO: Henry looking down at Etheline. please. Etheline starts to say something. perfectly round glasses on a settee in a room filled with avant-garde furniture and sculpture. Royal rides down in the elevator at the Lindbergh Palace. ROYAL Thanks. a red-and-pink-striped tie. INT. He has several sets of blueprints under his arm. Tell Mr. TELEPHONE ROOM.22. DAY. A title identifies him as Yasuo Oshima. The elevator stops. She takes Henry’s hand. INT. Pagoda frowns. A title identifies him as Franklin Benedict. Etheline smiles slightly.but had not considered a single one until this moment. gray moustache and jetblack hair. He is Dusty. Dusty. weathered face and wears a safari jacket. a dark pink shirt. He is dressed in a gray double-breasted Savile Row pinstripe suit. is it? HENRY (pause) That’s true. ELEVATOR. A white-haired man sits in a director’s chair on a sound stage. NARRATOR (CONT’D) -. Pagoda places a call. DAY. surrounded by extras dressed as futuristic earthlings and aliens. He has a strong. ETHELINE This isn’t really a tax issue. I don’t know why I put it that way. ETHELINE Let me think about it. (CONTINUED) . She hesitates. and Aristotle Onassis-style wrap-around sunglasses. The elevator operator has a thin. Royal this is the Pagoda.

A Royal and Pagoda stand alone in the middle of a field. DAY. INT. Royal answers it. He The elevator doors open and Royal strides out quickly. ROYAL What do you got? EXT. CONTINUED: DUSTY You’re welcome. INT. The telephone rings. ROYAL I don’t like the sound of this one damn bit. Lord knows I’ve had my share of infidelities. DAY. LOBBY. I mean. light. Tenenbaum. PAGODA The black man asks her to be his wife. ROYAL I’ll take it in there. INSERT: (CONTINUED) . Who is it? ROYAL BELLBOY A Mr. A bellboy appears. Royal points to a little wood-paneled telephone booth. Pagoda. (pause) And no goddamn two-bit chartered accountant’s going to change that. DAY. Royal stares off into space. crosses through a gigantic lobby. TELEPHONE BOOTH. misting rain falls. He shakes his head. Mr. CITY PARK.23. Pagoda. But she’s still my wife. ROYAL (quietly) No shit? And what’d Ethel say? PAGODA She thinks about it. BELLBOY There’s a call for you.

There are twenty people at five card tables playing bridge. Pagoda frowns. Chas? ETHELINE Chas stops in the doorway. ETHELINE Did you call a locksmith? CHAS (hesitates) Uh-huh. Etheline seems confused. up the stairs. They look very distinguished. (CONTINUED) . Pagoda carries the fish tank with the turtle in it. Chas. boxing gloves and a computer. The driver is Anwar. blankets. boxes. struggling with all of their possessions. Ari.” INT. Uzi. Chas. clothes. The bridge players watch strangely as they pass. Ari and a uniformed driver are unpacking suitcases. toys. It says “Chapter Three. Chas looks back at them but keeps moving. There is a silver BMW parked at the curb with three doors and the trunk open. NIGHT. CONTINUED: Page 50 of The Royal Tenenbaums. HALLWAY. Anwar and Pagoda come out of the hallway and cross through the living room. ETHELINE (CONT’D) What’s going on? CHAS We got locked out of our apartment. Etheline and Henry are among them. The doorbell rings. Most of them are in their fifties and sixties. Buckley is at his side. Buckley follows them. Pagoda comes into the hallway and opens the front door. Anwar and Buckley out of the room. Pagoda leads Ari. NIGHT.24. Uzi. Etheline hesitates. Pagoda. Buckley has a cold and coughs often. LIVING ROOM. Chas. Uzi is on the steps with a duffel bag over his shoulder and a stack of coloring books under his arm. Ari and Uzi all wear red Adidas warm-ups. He starts down the steps. INT. CHAS Give us a hand.

HALLWAY. CHAS’ BEDROOM. NIGHT. Etheline looks to her guests. too. Ari and Uzi sit silently on the bunk beds in Chas’ room. Chas looks up and studies the ceiling. CONTINUED: ETHELINE (pause) I don’t understand. Chas stand alone in the hallway. They have dark circles under their eyes and seem exhausted. NIGHT.25. INT. It feels like we’re Chas chuckles as he turns on his old electric tie rack. either. Silence. ETHELINE What are you talking about? CHAS The apartment. CHAS Isn’t this great? camping. He shrugs. I have to get some new sprinklers and a back-up security system installed. CUT TO: Two dalmation mice chewing on a plate of hors d'oeuvres on the window sill. She and Etheline closes the sliding door to the living room. He looks like a wreck. ETHELINE But there’s no sprinklers here. Did you pack your bags before you got locked out? Or how did you -CHAS It’s not safe over there. INT. CHAS Well. but acts incredibly cheerful. please. (CONTINUED) . The bridge players watch them silently. pretending not to notice how sad the boys look. Chas walks around the room examining things. we might have to do something about that. Etheline looks concerned. ETHELINE Excuse me for a moment.

Royal nods gravely.” Chas turns it around to face the wall. Uzi Royal sits on the edge of an examination table with white butcher paper on it. ROYAL What kind of side effects can be expected? DOCTOR Well. A certain percentage of patients may also experience seizure. and that way we can all be together. CHAS (CONT’D) You know what? I’m going to sleep in here. CHAS Who put that in here? There is a framed poster leading against the wall in the corner. comes and lies down next to him. INT. A young doctor on a rolling stool takes Royal’s blood pressure as they talk. He frowns. CONTINUED: ARI When are we going home? Chas sees something across the room.26. he comes back in. DOCTOR’S OFFICE. . ROYAL You mean like flopping around on the floor and everything? DOCTOR In some cases. Severe nausea and dizziness are standard. A caption across the top says “The Baumer. Chas spreads out a blanket on the floor and lies down. surrounded by a cheering crowd. It is a tennis-shoe advertisement with a picture of Richie holding a trophy over his head. Chas goes out the door. A moment later. DAY. there’s a number of possibilities. CHAS (CONT’D) See you in the morning. He kisses Ari and Uzi goodnight.

MARGOT I tied it to the radiator. She looks to Etheline. Etheline and Raleigh stand outside the bathroom in Margot and Raleigh’s apartment. I don’t think that’s very healthy. it can’t be very good for your eyes. BATHROOM. A key slides from under the door to Etheline’s feet. Margot answers without opening the door: Who is it? MARGOT ETHELINE It’s me. Margot is in the bathtub watching Planet of the Apes on her little black-and-white television set. do you? Nor do I think it’s very intelligent to keep an electrical gadget on the edge of the bathtub. MARGOT (pause) I doubt that. Etheline has on an overcoat and gloves. anyway. Etheline examines the television set. DAY. my darling. RALEIGH You have a visitor. Etheline sits on the edge of the tub with her coat in her lap. DAY. sweetie. Etheline smooths back Margot’s wet hair. (CONTINUED) . INT. ETHELINE Well.27. HALLWAY. There is a length of red twine wrapped around it and knotted to a pipe. Margot turns off the television set with her foot. Silence. Etheline looks to Raleigh. ETHELINE (CONT’D) Chas came home. ETHELINE Raleigh says you’ve been spending six hours a day locked in here watching television and soaking in the tub. EXT. ETHELINE Well. Raleigh knocks on the door. Raleigh looks embarrassed.

He watches Margot talking on the telephone. The front door of Margot and Raleigh’s apartment building opens. Hang on. Margot sets down her suitcases and goes into a telephone booth with graffiti spray-painted all over it.28. Etheline and Dudley walk behind them. RALEIGH But why is this bloody necessary? MARGOT Because I’m in a rut. and I need a change. Margot comes out and goes down the steps with three suitcases and her TV. But I think he’s been very depressed ever since -MARGOT (urgently) So am I. She closes the door and makes a call. ETHELINE (pause) So are you what? EXT. DUDLEY That taxi has a dent in it. Etheline stands on the corner and raises her hand into the air. Raleigh waits uncomfortably outside the telephone booth. MARGOT (frowns) Why are they allowed to do that? ETHELINE (hesitates) Well. Raleigh sounds desperately unhappy. Raleigh follows her. Dudley points at the taxi. Margot comes out of the telephone booth. STREET. I don’t know. CONTINUED: MARGOT (pause) What do you mean? ETHELINE He and Ari and Uzi are going to stay with me for a little while. RALEIGH You don’t love me anymore. A gypsy cab pulls over. DAY. do you? (CONTINUED) . exactly.

Margot goes into her room and sets her suitcases on the floor. She closes the door and locks it. CUT TO: Margot and Eli in Margot’s single bed with the sheets pulled over their heads. I’d just love to see her. She opens the door to the closet and turns on the light. Eli looks out nervously and slowly emerges. ELI (CONT’D) Could we have dinner with your mother sometime? Margot frowns. (CONTINUED) . Raleigh and Dudley watch the taxi drive away. Margot puts her suitcases into Dudley continues to point at it. the back seat of the taxi. She whispers: Hello? MARGOT There is a rustle behind some hanging clothes. Margot gets into the taxi. OK? Raleigh nods. and watching the news on her TV with the sound turned off. MARGOT’S BEDROOM. He whispers: ELI Hello. She looks at Eli strangely. Margot is eating potato chips. I can’t explain it right now. Etheline looks at Raleigh sadly. She gets into the taxi and closes the door. beautiful. Raleigh looks crestfallen. He is dressed in white briefs. NIGHT. Dudley takes a bite of a graham cracker.29. CONTINUED: MARGOT I do. INT. smoking a cigarette. DUDLEY Another dent here and another dent there. MARGOT (gently) I’ll call you. kind of. MARGOT What for? ELI (shrugs) I don’t know. Raleigh has tears in his eyes.

Etheline stops. hold on. Etheline comes out the front door of the Tenenbaum house and goes down the steps. ROYAL I want my family back. Eli looks disappointed. The next morning. CONTINUED: MARGOT I don’t think so. ETHELINE Stop following me. Royal suddenly appears at her side. I’m sorry for Royal hesitates for a fraction of a second. you. baby. Eli. ROYAL You got a minute? Etheline looks startled. ETHELINE Well. you can’t have it. She keeps walking. ETHELINE What are you talking about? Royal stares at her blankly. DAY. I want to spend some time with you and the children. ETHELINE (CONT’D) What happened? (CONTINUED) . SIDEWALK. ETHELINE What are you doing here? ROYAL I need a favor.30. I’m dying. EXT. He nods. ROYAL (CONT’D) I’m sick as a dog. I’ll be dead in six weeks. She looks to Royal. but it’s too late. ETHELINE Are you crazy? ROYAL Now. ROYAL I’m dying. dammit.

He hesitates. ROYAL (CONT’D) Hold on. Royal looks around Royal seems Etheline cannot seem to catch her breath. down. Let’s get -- Royal holds Etheline by the shoulders. He ROYAL (CONT’D) I’m not dying. I’m sorry. says gently. Etheline looks stunned. suddenly worried. ETHELINE (CONT’D) What’d they say? What’s the prognosis? Etheline begins to hyperventilate. time. trying to comfort her: Listen. my God. CONTINUED: Royal shrugs. I want us to -She says furiously: Etheline slaps Royal hard in the face. But I need some Etheline looks puzzled. ETHELINE (CONT’D) Oh. ROYAL (CONTINUED) . Etheline looks as if she is going to faint. ETHELINE (CONT’D) I didn’t know.31. ETHELINE What’s wrong with you? Ethel. scared. Ethel. A month. ROYAL (CONT’D) Maybe two. He looks Royal tries to calm her ETHELINE (urgently) Where’s the doctor? ROYAL Wait a second. nervously. Hold on. ROYAL Take it easy. Etheline stumbles a step and Royal catches her.

32. A telephone conversation. INT. 375TH STREET Y/CHAS’ ROOM. She looks back to Royal. INT. ETHELINE Are you or aren’t you? ROYAL (pause) Dying? Yes. UZI Who’s your father? CHAS His name’s Royal Tenenbaum. She goes over to him in the middle of the intersection. DAY. (CONTINUED) .” Chas sits at the desk in his bedroom on Archer Avenue. DAY. Henry sits at a desk in his study. HENRY’S APARTMENT/ETHELINE’S TELEPHONE ROOM. A sign on the wall says “Water Safety and Rescue Class. CONTINUED: (2) ETHELINE Go away! Etheline turns away and walks quickly across the street. There are ledger books and adding machines in front of him and glass statues of birds and animals behind him. Etheline stops. ARI You told us he was already dead. She can see from the look on his face that now he is telling the truth. ROYAL I am dying. Uzi stands beside him. HENRY And are they all right? ETHELINE Hard to say. Baby. Etheline is in the telephone room on Archer Avenue. 11 a. HENRY Have you told your children? ETHELINE More or less. Ari talks on a pay phone next to an indoor pool. A second telephone conversation. Each wears goggles and an orange life-jacket belted tightly.m.

33. CONTINUED: CHAS (hesitates) But now he’s really dying. INT. ELI’S TOWNHOUSE/MARGOT’S BATHROOM-DARKROOM. DAY.

A third telephone conversation. Eli sits on a couch in front of a painting of two men wearing ski masks riding a motorcycle chasing after a screaming girl in a bikini. He smokes a long, Moroccan-looking pipe. Margot talks on the telephone in her bathroom on Archer Avenue. There are three bottles of developing chemicals and a photographic enlarger next to the sink. ELI I’m very sorry, Margot. That’s OK. anyway. MARGOT We’re not actually related,

ELI That’s true. EXT. BOAT DECK. DAY.

The Cote d’Ivoire. Richie sits under a wool blanket in a chaise lounge reading a telegram with “Shore to Ship” printed across the top. He looks upset. A waiter stands next to him with a pen and a pad of paper in his hand. All of the other passengers on the deck are very elderly and have white hair. RICHIE I’d like to send a response, Alberto. Yes, sir. WAITER Go ahead. I’m

RICHIE Dear Mom, I received your message. coming home as soon as possible. (pause) Who do I see about that? The waiter shrugs. EXT. PIER 32. DAY.

The entrance to the passenger terminal for the Cote d’Ivoire. A sign across the glass says “Royal Arctic Line.” Richie stands on the sidewalk with his hands in his pockets as bundled-up, white-haired passengers and baggage handlers run by around him. He has two small suitcases and a vinyl bag with a pouch on he side for a tennis racket. There is no racket in it. Two elderly men with white hair come over to him. (CONTINUED)

34. CONTINUED: ELDERLY MAN 1 Can we get a picture with you, Baumer? Richie nods. One of the elderly men gives his camera to a baggage handler, and they stand next to Richie. ELDERLY MAN 2 I saw you whip Vishniac in the finals at Glenchester. You were beautiful back then. Richie smiles briefly. picture. The baggage handler takes the

ELDERLY MAN 1 Thanks, Champ. The two elderly men walk away. A city bus stops at the corner. The door opens and Margot gets out. She smiles at Richie and waves. She wears a mink coat with a belt around it. She has on pink gloves. She walks across the sidewalk and stops ten feet in front of Richie as the bus drives away. They stand there smiling at each other. MARGOT Stand up straight and let me get a look at you. Richie stands up a little straighter and continues to look at Margot with the same smile. MARGOT (CONT’D) What’s so funny? Richie shrugs. MARGOT (CONT’D) Well, it’s nice to see you, too. Their smiles fade, and they both look cold and sad. Richie reaches out his hand. Margot goes over to him and puts her arms around him. EXT. TENENBAUM HOUSE. DAY.

Margot and Richie stand on the steps in front of the house. The door opens and Etheline and Pagoda come outside and hug Richie. Richie and Henry shake hands. Ari and Uzi come running out and hug Richie. NARRATOR (V.O.) That night, Etheline found all of her children living together under the same roof for the first time in seventeen years.


35. CONTINUED: Chas watches from his window on the third floor. Richie looks up and sees him. Richie waves tentatively. Chas waves back without smiling. EXT. ROOF. DAWN. opens feet, says and

Richie comes out on to the roof dressed in pajamas. He his falcon’s coop. He puts his hand under the falcon’s and the falcon steps on to his fist. The falcon’s hood Mordecai across the front. Richie pulls a leather cord lifts the hood off the falcon’s head. He strokes the falcon’s feathers and talks softly in its ear. NARRATOR (V.O.) The next morning Richie woke at dawn. He had decided birds should not be kept in cages, fed Mordecai three sardines, and set him free.

CUT TO: An hour later. Richie sits on a box on the roof eating a bowl of cereal and reading a book called Three Plays by Margot Tenenbaum. There is an empty tin of sardines at his feet. The door to the falcon’s coop is open, and the falcon is gone. INSERT: Page 76 of The Royal Tenenbaums. EXT. STREET. EVENING. It says “Chapter Four.”

Royal gets out of a gypsy cab in front of the Tenenbaum house. He is dressed in a white bathrobe, white pajamas and red bedroom slippers. He carries a cane, but walks across the sidewalk quickly and energetically. Pagoda waits for him at the top of the steps. hands. Silence. OK. ROYAL They shake

Pagoda opens the front door. INT. LIVING ROOM. EVENING.

Royal sits on a stool across from Richie and Margot on the couch. Chas stands at a table in the corner reading Richie’s Atlas of the World. Royal looks to Chas. Chas looks back at him but does not move. Royal looks back to Richie and Margot. ROYAL I’ve missed the hell out of you, my darlings. You know that, don’t you? (CONTINUED)

CHAS (yawning) How long are you going to last? Royal looks across the room at Chas.36. Royal looks back to Richie and Margot. Not long. Will you give me a chance? (CONTINUED) . and I love you more than anything. from his atlas. ROYAL (CONT’D) But let me get to the point here. MARGOT ROYAL (shrugs) I had a good run. Dad. RICHIE You don’t look so sick. CONTINUED: MARGOT I hear you’re dying. I’m sorry. ROYAL RICHIE What’ve you got? ROYAL I’ve got a pretty bad case of cancer. A month? ROYAL CHAS A year? Chas does not look up ROYAL About six weeks. ROYAL So they tell me. The three of you and your mother are all I’ve got. I’ve got six weeks to set things right with you. Thank you. Now. Chas laughs quietly. and I aim to do it. ROYAL (CONT’D) Let me finish.

That’s right. at some point. Thanks. MARGOT He looks back to Royal. RICHIE (pause) I haven’t been out there since I was six. But the first thing I’d like to do is take you to see your grandmother. ROYAL Do you speak for everyone? CHAS I speak for myself. MARGOT I haven’t been there at all. never invited. isn’t it? can swing by her grave. I was ROYAL Well. she wasn’t your real grandmother. ROYAL Well. really. I can’t say. you’re invited this time. we (CONTINUED) . Anyway. Richie looks to Chas. too. you’ve made your views known. I suppose.37. CONTINUED: (2) CHAS No. Rachael’s buried there. Make up for lost time. RICHIE You know. So why don’t you let somebody else do some of the talking now? MARGOT What do you propose to do? ROYAL Well. so I didn’t know you’d be interested. too. Well. sweetie. ROYAL (pause) CHAS Who? My wife. ROYAL Oh.

ROYAL (CONT’D) May I see my grandsons? Why? CHAS ROYAL Because I’d like to finally meet them. Chas scoffs at the idea and shakes his head. Chas? Chas stops. CONTINUED: (3) Chas slams the atlas shut and puts it back into the bookcase. ROYAL (CONT’D) Don’t give me that guff. Royal extends his hand as Chas walks by. Royal looks to be on the . Margot waves. There is a clean square and a hook on the wall in the stairwell. Chas walks away up the stairs. EVENING. as if something has been removed. verge of tears. Chas slaps it away and goes out of the room. INT. Chas is already half-way to the second floor as Royal appears at the bottom of the steps. He yells toward the kitchen: Pagoda! INT. ROYAL He looks down to Royal. LIVING ROOM. children. Royal says to Margot and Richie: ROYAL (CONT’D) I’ll be right back.38. Royal stands in the living room with Richie and Margot. ROYAL (CONT’D) Thank you. He walks toward the door. my sweet boy. CHAS I think we’ll pass. ROYAL Where’s my javelina? NIGHT. Royal frowns. STAIRWAY. ROYAL I’ll say goodnight to you now. Richie hugs Royal.

down the steps. Royal clamps his hand on Pagoda’s arm and lets out a slow whistle. Royal gets into the taxi and closes the door. ROYAL (CONT’D) Hello. Henry Hold He bounds Royal puts out his hand for Henry to give him five. the cab. ROYAL Lay it on me. ROYAL (CONT’D) Look at that old grizzly bear. driver. Pagoda nods. man. Ethel! Good evening. Goodnight all. DAY. Royal says quickly: ROYAL I’ll contact you in the next twelve hours and give you further instructions. what can I say? Henry looks uneasy. NIGHT. please. Henry leaves the door to the taxi open. Royal’s face darkens. ETHELINE Royal. Royal licks his fingers and smooths back his hair. STREET. Margot and Eli walk together down a street with trash everywhere and abandoned cars and broken windows. this is Henry Sherman. Royal and Pagoda stand outside the top of the front steps. Henry. (CONTINUED) . sir. Hey. EXT. ETHELINE Don’t pay any attention to that man.39. EXT. I’m dying. Henry and Etheline get out of the taxi. reluctantly slaps hands with Royal and says: HENRY How do you do? ROYAL (shrugs) Ah. A taxi stops in front of the house. TENENBAUM HOUSE. ROYAL I’m just kidding. They each carry a playbill for a play called That Rascal.

ELI (CONT’D) How’s Richie? MARGOT (pause) I don’t know. A voice comes on the call box: Hello? VOICE ELI Sugar. VOICE Margot says blankly: The door buzzes open. Me. ELI (CONT’D) You don’t give a shit. MARGOT (frowns) What are you talking about? ELI (shrugs) That’s what he said. I can’t tell. (points to a deli) Right there is where you used to go get jacked off. CONTINUED: ELI Right there is where I used to go get jacked off. Hey. Margot nods. He says he’s in love with you. Hang on. She seems distracted. MARGOT I’m listening. I don’t know how we’re supposed to take it. They stop in front of a partially demolished building.40. Eli? (CONTINUED) . They walk in silence for a minute. ELI Yeah. baby. Eli presses the buzzer to one of the apartments. it’s Eli. either. He wrote me a letter. MARGOT What are we doing. ELI That’s right.

The archaeologists crouch around Etheline while she compares a bit of soil on the end of a trowel with a color chart in a handbook. and shaking dirt through metal hand-screens. It was told in confidence. ETHELINE Don’t be silly. sir. About Richie. She has on sunglasses and boots. He puts the pebble back on the CUT TO: Etheline and Henry walking through a trench together. looks up at the destroyed building. by the way. He wears a gray wool suit and tie. sketching. ARCHAEOLOGICAL EXCAVATION. He picks up a pebble off the ground and looks at it. Henry appears in the background. Margot stands alone on the street. Etheline says to the three archaeologists: ETHELINE (CONT’D) These were probably slaves. climbing down a ladder on the far side of the pit. She A large network of pits between two brownstone townhouses. DAY. ground. ETHELINE Good. Etheline dusts off a partially unearthed skeleton. Now I’ll just remove the loose soil and note the decomposition levels. She is dressed entirely in denim except for a scarf over her hair. EXT. (CONTINUED) . Before the arrival of the -GRADUATE STUDENT What are you doing? A graduate student with a shovel is looking at Henry and frowning. surveying. The three archaeologists are all scruffy young men with beards. Eli goes inside. HENRY I’m sorry to interrupt your work. GRADUATE STUDENT (CONT’D) Please. put that artifact back where you found it. Etheline and the three archaeologists turn around and see them. There are workers digging.41. CONTINUED: (2) ELI I just got to pick something up. Don’t repeat that. Henry looks embarrassed.

42. CONTINUED: HENRY I just wanted to apologize for the other day. When I proposed to you. Why? ETHELINE I thought it was very sweet.

HENRY Look. I know I’m not as accomplished as some of the men you’ve been involved with. Franklin Benedict and General Cartwright and your ex-husband and -ETHELINE That’s ridiculous. HENRY But I feel I have just as much to offer as any of them. I know I went about it backwards, but -ETHELINE Henry, I have no interest in Frank Benedict or Doug Cartwright. I never did. Henry falls into a pit and disappears from view. does not notice this and continues walking. ETHELINE (CONT’D) And as far as Royal is concerned, he’s the most -Etheline stops. She looks around. She sees Henry climbing up a ladder, out of the pit. He is covered with dirt and has a small twig in his hair. She rushes over to him. ETHELINE (CONT’D) Are you all right? Henry sighs. He brushes some dirt off his jacket. Etheline

HENRY I’m fine. Anyway, let me know when you make up your mind. Henry starts to walk away. Etheline grabs his sleeve.

ETHELINE Wait a second, Henry. Henry stops. He looks to Etheline. kisses it. He looks surprised. I’m sorry. She takes his hand and

ETHELINE (CONT’D) I’m very nervous. (CONTINUED)

43. CONTINUED: (2) Etheline pulls the twig out of Henry’s hair. That’s OK. HENRY Thank you. Why are you --

ETHELINE To tell you the truth, I haven’t slept with a man in eighteen years. Silence. Henry nods. He puts his hand on Etheline’s cheek. DAY.


Margot lies in her bed behind a mosquito net watching a downhill skiing competition on her portable television. Etheline stands in the doorway and says calmly: ETHELINE I think I’m falling for Henry. Margot looks to Etheline. netting. MARGOT That’s amazing. ETHELINE What do you think of him? MARGOT (excited) I think he’s gorgeous. ETHELINE I’ll tell you a secret. marry him. He asked me to She pulls open the mosquito

MARGOT (dreamily) I’m going to have a father. ETHELINE (hesitates) Well, I haven’t accepted yet. Besides, you already have a father, sweetheart. MARGOT Not really. Plus, now he’s dying. CUT TO: The hallway outside Margot’s room. dark, watching from the stairs. Pagoda is poised in the




A rooftop park with a chain-link fence around it. There are several fighters lifting weights and jumping rope. Ari does chin-ups from a jungle gym. Uzi does sit-ups on a mat. Buckley lays on the cement beside them. Someone whistles from behind the fence. Ari and Uzi look. It is Royal. He is inside a telephone booth with the door partly open, holding the receiver to his ear. He signals for Ari and Uzi to come over. Ari frowns. He looks across the courtyard to Anwar, sitting on a bench, reading a BMW owner’s manual. Royal ducks back into the telephone booth and holds the receiver to his ear. Anwar does not look up. Ari slides down a fire-station-type pole. He and Uzi cautiously go over to the fence with Buckley. Royal hangs up the receiver and comes out of the telephone booth. ROYAL That’s a hell of an old hound dog you got there. What’s he go by? Buckley. ARI

ROYAL (pointing at Buckley) Buckley. Sit. Buckley sits. Royal looks impressed. He turns to Ari.

ROYAL (CONT’D) You know who I am? Ari shakes his head. I’m Royal. ROYAL (CONT’D) You heard of me? His expression becomes

Ari nods. Royal looks pleased. serious again.

ROYAL (CONT’D) I’m very sorry for your loss. Your mother was a terribly attractive woman. ARI (pause) Thank you. ROYAL Which one are you?


Royal looks back to Ari and Uzi. UZI But we just met. ROYAL (looks to Uzi) Uzi..45.. ROYAL (shakes his head) Do me a favor. He stares off into space. ROYAL (CONT’D) How’s your daddy? Fine. ARI ROYAL You think so? How often’s he got you working out? ARI Sixteen times a week. Hello. I don’t get invited around much. ROYAL No. we didn’t. I’m your granddad. (pause) Here’s what you tell him. UZI ROYAL I’m sorry we haven’t gotten to know each other. CONTINUED: ARI Ari. but we’re going to have to pull some strings to make that happen. What do you think about that. I guess. Ari and Uzi look confused. . Royal sighs. by the way? You don’t have to say anything. I want us to have a relationship. Tell him you want to meet me. ROYAL (CONT’D) Kind of a fuck-you to the old man. ROYAL (CONT’D) Look.

Chas wears his red one. Ari and Uzi stand together dressed in black Adidas warm-ups. CHAS’ BEDROOM. The trees are bare. wasn’t she? CHAS I wouldn’t know. A technician tinkers with a large Xerox machine on the other side of the room. Chas. DAY. We got another body buried out here. INT. Silence. Royal takes half of the white flowers off his mother’s grave and hands them to Chas. Ari and Uzi are both dressed in black Adidas warm-ups. He sighs. He says to O’Reilly Tenenbaum Earth.46.” Epitaph: “The Salt of the places a bouquet of white flowers at the There are tears in his eyes. DAY. A small cemetery next to an electrical power plant. Ari and Uzi sit across from Chas.” Royal foot of the grave. RICHIE ROYAL Is he worth a damn? (CONTINUED) . that’s right. and the city is across the river. Take some of these. wouldn’t she? Chas turns his chair around and looks to Ari and Uzi. Another technician rolls in a crate on a dolly. EXT. Chas: ROYAL She was a tough old broad. Excuse me. Royal’s mother’s gravestone reads “Helen (1909-1962). ARI I bet Mom would’ve wanted us to meet him before he died. Chas walks away. He is behind his desk with his back turned to them. ROYAL Oh. CEMETERY. Royal and Richie stand beside them. You know him? Yeah. Silence. ROYAL (CONT’D) What do you think of this big old black buck moving in up there? RICHIE (pause) Who? ROYAL Henry Sherman. Hang on.

There are a mother and father and five very young children. Did you know that? Uzi shakes his head. and she wears a black LaCoste dress. Royal nods. UZI How’d it get chopped off by -Uzi. She reaches to adjust the log slightly just as the father swings an axe and chops the log in half. sister Maggie.47. Margot looks to the father as if he is an idiot. Everyone looks stunned. A fourteen-year-old Margot stands behind a barn with a family of blond farmers. I’m adopted. The father stares at Margot’s bloody hand. ARI MARGOT It’s OK. Shh.” Uzi stares at Margot’s missing finger. EXT. And I went to find my real family when I was fourteen. Uzi and Margot standing in front of Rachael’s gravestone. I am. CUT TO: (CONTINUED) . and black nail polish. CONTINUED: RICHIE I believe so. UZI What happened to your finger? Ari looks quickly to Uzi. which reads “Rachael Evans Tenenbaum (19652000). They live in Indiana. Margot’s hair is dyed black. MARGOT (CONT’D) Well. FARM. FATHER Now just set one of them hickory trunks right up on top there. DAY. I’ll tell you. CUT TO: Ari. Margot sets a log sideways on top of a wood pile. black eyeliner. MARGOT It got chopped off by an axe.

Royal says wistfully: ROYAL (CONT’D) I wish it were mine. Drowned in the Caspian Sea. you know. CUT TO: Richie and Royal looking at an impressive monument in the middle of the cemetery. isn’t it? What? RICHIE ROYAL You probably had another good two to three years of competitive play in you. RICHIE (shrugs) Probably. Ari and Uzi standing together. Silence. ROYAL (CONT’D) Why’d you choke out there that day. INSERT: (CONTINUED) . Richie nods. CUT TO: Royal and Richie walking together among the gravestones. ROYAL I had a lot riding on that match.48. ARI Did you try to sew it back on? MARGOT (shakes her head) Couldn’t find it.” ROYAL That’s a hell of a damn grave. ROYAL (CONT’D) It’s a shame. Baumer? RICHIE (pause) I don’t know. CONTINUED: Margot. An inscription says: “Veteran of Two Wars. Dad. Father of Nine Children. Richie nods. Financially and personally.

and her new husband. and . Gandhi serves. He looks into the stands. Richie serves suddenly.O. They were just married yesterday.actually. with Rachael. Clair. Richie hits his return directly off the court and deep into the stands. He hesitates.) That’s seventy-two unforced errors for Richie Tenenbaum. didn’t I? (CONTINUED) . He’s taken off his shoes and one of his socks. Margot. They look very concerned. Richie stares at Margot and Raleigh. He looks to Royal in a lonely seat up in the nosebleed section. CUT TO: Royal and Richie standing together. What’s he feeling right now. He’s playing the worst tennis of his life.O.O. With a bizarre swing. ROYAL I kind of disappeared after that.) I don’t know. underhand. watch from their seats in a courtside box. ANNOUNCER (V.49. Jim. He shakes his head and talks to himself. Raleigh St. barely tossing the ball into the air. Gandhi nails his return. TEX HAYWARD (V.O. It is briefly revealed that he is wearing no shoes and only one sock. Jim. ANNOUNCER (V. There’s obviously something wrong with him. He looks to Chas. Richie is shown preparing to serve with tears all over his face. Richie is playing an Indian player dressed all in white. Royal stands up and walks towards the exit. Tex Hayward? TEX HAYWARD (V.) That’s his sister.) Who’s he looking at in the friends’ box. I think he’s crying. holding hands. He looks to Etheline. CONTINUED: (2) A television set tuned in to network coverage of a tennis match on grass courts. Tex? Margot and Raleigh. and Richie attempts to play it by throwing his racket at the ball. Ari and Uzi. A title identifies him as Sanjay Gandhi.

CONTINUED: (3) RICHIE (shrugs) Yeah. Twice. Royal nods. Were we? Chas does not respond. Tenenbaum to withdraw these funds without your written authorization? ROYAL Objection. dammit -- (CONTINUED) . Chas and Royal and two attorneys sit across from him. Royal says quietly: ROYAL It was the object of the game. do I? INT. ROYAL You still got that little BB in your hand. Chas stands beside him. typing. He holds up his hand and shows Royal a little round bump between two knuckles. I know you’re not very good with disappointment. ROYAL (CONT’D) Well. JUDGE And how was it possible for Mr. CUT TO: Royal scraping some dirt off of Rachael’s gravestone with his foot. you sued me. A stenographer sits at a metal stand. ROYAL Royal sighs. A lawyer in a robe sits behind his desk. Royal taps it with his finger.50. But I don’t hold it against you. He kicks a pebble on the ground. Chassie? Chas looks to Royal. wasn’t it? No. but I understood. Now. CHAS Why’d you shoot me? Silence. CHAS We were on the same team. JUDGE’S CHAMBERS. It moves slightly. DAY. And got me disbarred. your honor.

CHAS (CONT’D) He also stole bonds out of my safety deposit box when I was fourteen. object. ARI ROYAL Call me Mr. Don’t CHAS Because I started the corporation when I was a minor. sir. ARI ROYAL I’m kidding. OK. CONTINUED: ROYAL’S LAWYER This isn’t a courtroom. OK. Uzi looks to Royal. ARI Royal yells across the cemetery to Richie and Margot.51. Chas’ attorney whispers something into his ear. UZI Were you in prison? ROYAL Kind of. Royal looks guilty. so my father was the primary signatory on most of my accounts. (CONTINUED) . CUT TO: Royal and Chas surrounded with Ari and Uzi. The judge looks to Royal. Chas turns and walks away. Royal. ROYAL You think you could start forgiving me? CHAS Why should I? ROYAL Because you’re hurting me. Tenenbaum. Call me Pappy. Minimum security. Should we split? Yes. I got jacked by the IRS.

Baumer! All right! Richie smiles and waves to the maintenance man. I heard about that letter you sent to Eli.Anyway. A pack of cigarettes falls out of Margot’s pocket on to the ground. MARGOT By the way. I know he’s a lot older than you are. He hesitates. CONTINUED: (2) ROYAL Let’s shag ass! CUT TO: Margot and Richie walking toward the cemetery gates. They stop walking and look at it. . if you need someone to talk to. Margot picks up the pack of cigarettes and puts it back in her pocket. RICHIE Well. MARGOT Thanks. Silence. Richie starts to say something. MARGOT Those aren’t mine. Come on! A maintenance man with a shovel in his hand yells from across the cemetery: MAINTENANCE MAN Hey. OK? I like Raleigh very much. let me know.52. but -. they just fell out of your pocket. RICHIE You dropped some cigarettes. and you’re having some problems. RICHIE How are you and Raleigh getting along? You think you’re going to get back together? MARGOT (pause) I don’t know. RICHIE Well. OK. maybe I can help.

Sabrina. INT. Richie stands on the top step. Eli’s wife. I wonder? RICHIE Well. is painting in her studio. Look at you. INT. Classical music plays quietly on the record player. I would ask you the same question. ELI I know. She is very beautiful and wears spectacles and a white sari. ELI Oh. DAY. Sabrina? ELI She seems irritated. with antiques and potted flowers and old rugs. ELI CASH’S TOWNHOUSE. They smile sadly at each other. that was meant to be just between you and me. Eli embraces Richie. ELI (pause) Rightly so. my Lord. (CONTINUED) Sabrina does not look up. He opens the front door. It is furnished like a house in the English countryside.53. I’m sorry. STUDIO. She is barefoot. CUT TO: Richie and Eli walking into the front room of the house. ELI (CONT’D) Yes. Eli walks into the vestibule smoking a joint which he keeps in his mouth at all times like a cigarette. RICHIE Eli. Richie and Eli walk into the next room. Why would she have repeated that. RICHIE Did you tell Margot about that letter I wrote you? ELI (hesitates) Why? Did she mention it? Richie does not respond. . I did. DAY.

She SABRINA Hello. Silence. She is Sabrina’s model. Charlotte is five. has an English accent. Cinnamon looks at Eli coldly. Hello. They are both drinking wine. Stetson is six. ELI What’d you say? (CONTINUED) . Richie looks disturbed. Charlotte? Richie. Sabrina looks to Richie. There is a large zip-lock bag of marijuana on the table. as he is in the process of relighting his joint. The children do not respond to Eli. ELI (CONT’D) That’s Cinnamon. Cinnamon. He works at a spinning potter’s wheel. They are both blond and fair. ELI Stetson? Say hello to Uncle There are two children in the corner. except where she wore a bikini. He notices a nude.54. INT. DAY. She is only mildly surprised. frightening painting on the wall of five men wearing African masks and sitting on dirtbikes. RICHIE How’d she break her arm? ELI (sadly) I fell down the stairs with her. Cinnamon. She is painting a set of teacups. Sabrina hugs and kisses Richie. darling. There is a large. teenaged girl standing on the table. She has a deep tan. She has a cast in a sling on her arm. molding a hunk of clay. Eli sits on a couch across from Richie. Eli does not appear to notice this. ELI’S STUDY. CONTINUED: SABRINA What? ELI Look what I found on the doorstep.

for some reason. RICHIE How often do you -ELI I’m worried about you. INSERT: (CONTINUED) . (pause) She’s married. Don’t listen to me. RICHIE Did you say you’re on mescaline? ELI (nods) I did. Richie. Yeah. actually. (barely audible) I’m on mescaline.55. indeed. you know. Eli pours himself another glass of wine. But I did find it odd when you said you were in love with her. Very much so. Richie reflects on this for a minute. RICHIE (pause) Why? ELI Well. Margot is. RICHIE (quickly) Adopted. ELI When? Right now? (pause) I’m sorry. RICHIE ELI And she’s your sister. CONTINUED: RICHIE (pause) ELI Hm? What? RICHIE I didn’t say anything. I’ve been spaced out all day.

(CONTINUED) . Royal says suddenly: ROYAL Where’re my encyclopedias? MANAGER They’ve been placed in storage. Frederick? MANAGER The manager looks to the bellboy. I’m sorry. suitcases and boxes are stacked and piled on four carts next to the front desk. Royal comes into the lobby and freezes. CONTINUED: (2) Page 112 of The Royal Tenenbaums.” The side entrance of the hotel. revolving doors. Dusty. sir. INT. ROYAL Hello. ROYAL You son of a bitch. appears at Royal’s side. The bellboy begins to roll one of the carts across the lobby. LOBBY. A bellboy rolls a fifth cart next to the others. DAY. The manager walks away. There are also several dozen hanging garments on a rack with wheels on it. DAY. EXT. MANAGER I’d be happy to make a reservation for you at another hotel. Dusty. A large number of trunks.56. You’re taking my encyclopedias. This is humiliating. MANAGER Hello. Royal goes in through It says “Chapter Five. the elevator operator. LINDBERGH PALACE HOTEL. The manager and his assistant come over and watch Royal study his possessions. ROYAL (shaking his head) Damn you. MANAGER Would you like to -- ROYAL Where am I supposed to go? You’re turning me into a goddamn hobo.

I think he’d be much more comfortable here than -CHAS Who gives a shit? I do. You poor. Henry. What are you suggesting? RICHIE That he come here and stay in my room. INT. CHAS Are you out of your mind? RICHIE (sincerely) No.57. RICHIE And he agreed that -- CHAS I’m sorry. Chas. poppa’s boy. Royal places a call from the lobby. RICHIE CHAS You poor sucker. CONTINUED: ROYAL Spot me a quarter. NIGHT. Etheline. washed-up Henry puts his hand gently on Chas’ arm. Maybe I’m a little confused. ETHELINE Have you spoken to him about this? Briefly. Ari and Uzi sit at the table eating dessert. RICHIE I think he’s very lonely. (CONTINUED) . Lonelier than he lets on. TELEPHONE BOOTH. Anyway. Richie. will you? Of course. I’m not. Margot. ROYAL It’s your dad. and maybe lonelier than he even realizes. Richie? INT. DINING ROOM. MANAGER DAY.

UZI We brought an extra sleeping bag you can use. Mr. ETHELINE Call him Henry. UZI You want to borrow our electric -Uzi. This is a family matter. Chas jerks his arm away. I’ve got an old Scout cot and a couple of army blankets. CHAS Don’t get in the middle of this.58. (CONTINUED) . CHAS ARI We don’t mind. RICHIE Oh. call me Henry. ARI (to Richie) Where are you going to sleep? RICHIE I’ll just camp out upstairs. that’s OK. Sherman. Why? CHAS I don’t know him that well. HENRY Please. Who? UZI Pappy? We like him. Mr. All right. MARGOT Don’t talk to him like that. Sherman. CHAS I prefer Mr. Sherman. Dad. yes. ETHELINE You’ve known him for ten years. CONTINUED: HENRY Let’s not get out of hand. CHAS As your accountant.

RICHIE’S BEDROOM. Richie? Richie hands Royal his cane. He produces a wooden spoon. now. Where’s my suitcase? Royal’s knee gives out. Get out. goddammit. Chas stands in the doorway. ROYAL (CONT’D) Would you mind handing me my cane. RICHIE (CONT’D) I think he’s asleep. He staggers a step. Royal struggles to his feet. RICHIE Well. Pagoda has on a surgical mask and scrubs. NIGHT. Dad? RICHIE (CONTINUED) . he’s already up there. He rolls the IV stand beside him. things. INT. There are several monitors and machines breathing and humming. because of the medication he’s on. CONTINUED: (2) Chas looks shocked and then revolted. which he takes between his teeth. But I guess you can wake him up and throw him out. All right. He grips the back of a chair and looks to Richie with a surprised expression. surgical scrubs.59. Royal sits up on the edge of the bed. Royal lies on an electric hospital bed. ROYAL (CONT’D) Let’s see. Richie’s room has been converted into a makeshift hospital room. if Mom says it’s OK. CHAS It’s not your decision. He has an IV in his arm and a tube in his nose. There are numerous bottles of pills and medicines on the night stand. CHAS ROYAL Let me just collect my He is dressed in pink Richie is behind him. ETHELINE Nor is it yours. Silence. He collapses on to the floor.

the elevator operator from the Lindbergh Palace. Etheline Dusty speaks with the Tenenbaums in the hallway outside Richie’s bedroom. Can you sub for him tonight?” CUT TO: (CONTINUED) He looks at it. CUT TO: Forty-five minutes later. son. McClure.60. . INSERT: Dusty’s beeper has a digital message on it: “Smitty worked a double yesterday. INT. my goodness! Pagoda. He is being examined by Dusty. DUSTY His condition is stable. ROYAL Call Dr. Richie yells out the door: Mom! RICHIE (CONT’D) ROYAL Grab me a Nembutal. HALLWAY. ROYAL Fuck do you care? Richie gives Royal a pill with a glass of water. NIGHT. Chas frowns. I recommend that you push fluids and continue the stomach cancer medication. ETHELINE Oh. He checks Royal’s pulse while everyone watches. CONTINUED: Richie and Pagoda rush over and kneel on the floor beside Royal. Royal is back in bed. The attack was just a side-effect. Chas looks down at Royal. Dusty’s beeper goes off. comes to the door. Richie runs to the night stand and pops open a bottle of pills. CHAS Are you OK? Royal takes the spoon out of his mouth. Dusty is dressed in a white lab coat and elevatoroperator pants with a red stripe down the side.

RICHIE Is he going to be all right? DUSTY That depends. I have another call to make.61. including my epitaph. Now. by the way. Royal a small brown paper sack. ROYAL (CONT’D) Proof-read it for me before they carve it on the headstone. NIGHT. ROYAL Pagoda is in possession of a parcel that contains my will and some instructions regarding the funeral. RICHIE DUSTY (solemnly) Then that’s the best we’ve got. Pagoda comes in and hands Etheline sits next to Royal’s bed. if you’ll excuse me. CHAS For how long? DUSTY We’ll have to wait and see. CHAS Can we move him? DUSTY Absolutely not. Is he a fighter? Yeah. Etheline nods. ETHELINE ROYAL I never did stop loving you. INT. for when the time comes. (CONTINUED) . Do you believe that? ETHELINE Not really. RICHIE’S BEDROOM. OK? OK. CONTINUED: Dusty pushing a button on his beeper.

drinking a milkshake. He closes the door. Etheline shakes her head and goes out of the room. Royal says in a quiet. Chas turns out the light. A dalmation mouse eats some crumbs off the floor. Chas. CUT TO: An hour later. Them’s the rules. strangely upbeat voice in the darkness: ROYAL Goodnight. Silence. Royal lies in bed. The ballroom on and tables with Near the center tent. ROYAL I was going to read for a little bit. NIGHT. He walks away. ETHELINE (pause) Thanks. there is a yellow nylon pupis dark except for a lamp glowing inside the . He unwraps it and takes a bite. the top floor of the house. The room tent. CHAS Lights out. Royal raises an eyebrow. stunning. That dress is ROYAL I’m in the middle of a sentence. BALLROOM. of the room. He hesitates. Royal opens the paper sack and withdraws a cheeseburger wrapped in aluminum foil. CHAS Have to finish it up in the morning. Chas appears in the doorway. Chas hesitates. CHAS 11:30. old man. Henry is standing in the doorway. m’boy.62. INT. Lights out. Sorry. There are chairs sheets over them lined up along the walls. CONTINUED: ROYAL You look terrific. reading a spy novel.

INT. whatever it is. TENT. Chas looks disturbed by this. Chas comes into the tent. RICHIE’S BEDROOM. EXT. He looks down at the street. Richie lies on the cot reading Three Plays by Margot Tenenbaum. too. I don’t. and I love you. I love you. CHAS (gritting his teeth) Stop saying that. CHAS Well. huh? RICHIE (pause) He’s your dad. Chas. NIGHT. There is a photograph of the Tenenbaum family taped to the nylon wall. CHAS No. Eli is climbing out a window on the second floor. ROYAL What’s that jackass doing here? (CONTINUED) . DAY. You’re my brother. Royal throws his cigarette out the window. (pause) You really hate me. he’s not. There is a Boy Scout sleeping bag on an air mattress on a cot inside the tent. CHAS Looks like you and Dad are back together again. He frowns. But believe me. I know what you and the boys have been through. startled. I don’t know what you think you’re going to get out of this.63. don’t you? RICHIE (puzzled) No. Pagoda sits next to him drinking a cup of coffee. RICHIE I don’t want to hurt you. Chas. it’s not worth it. Richie looks up. The next morning. Royal sits on the window sill smoking a cigarette. There is a small table with a stack of books and some of Richie’s Matchbox cars and tennis trophies on it.

He steps on it. The backyard. Their eyes meet. drinking tea. He used to send me his grades in college.” CUT TO: Margot and Etheline sitting together in Etheline’s study. MARGOT (incredulous) What for? ETHELINE I think he just likes the encouragement. He looks up to Royal. INSERT: An article on Eli in the Sunday magazine section. Eli. Tenenbaum. Love. MARGOT (frowns) That’s ridiculous. He sees Royal’s cigarette burning on the ground. He’s done it for years. DAY. Etheline is reading the article on Eli. Margot is reading Henry’s book. Eli drops to the sidewalk. Royal yells: ROYAL (CONT’D) I know you.” There is a photograph of Eli in the desert holding a dead rattlesnake by the tail in each hand. MARGOT Did Eli send you that? ETHELINE (nods) He always sends me his clippings. Just in case you missed it. The headline says “Where the Wild Things Are. asshole! Eli hesitates. Raleigh is standing in the window. RALEIGH How long do you intend to stay here? MARGOT I don’t know. Accounting for Everything. GARDEN. (CONTINUED) .64. He looks miserable. CONTINUED: Pagoda looks down at Eli. Margot and Etheline look up. Margot and Raleigh sit at a metal table He smiles defiantly. There is a rap on the glass. A note stapled to the top says: “Dear Mrs. Margot looks at it. He runs away. EXT.

And I don’t think he deserves -MARGOT Stay out of it.65. Raleigh sits up suddenly. MARGOT What are you talking about? even know him. Silence. DAY. Margot puts her hand on his back. MARGOT But -- RALEIGH I want to die. HALLWAY. He knocks on the railing. For God’s sake. at the top of the stairs. No. Raleigh stands up and walks away. MARGOT Raleigh. INT. Royal watches down the stairwell as Margot comes up. But -RALEIGH You’re joking. please. She looks up at him. Raleigh crumples into a ball on the ground and stays there. Royal steps on to the landing (CONTINUED) . You don’t ROYAL I’ve met him. RALEIGH Have you met someone else? MARGOT (pause) I couldn’t begin to even think about knowing how to answer that question. Margot walks toward her room. CONTINUED: RALEIGH Are you ever coming home? MARGOT (pause) Maybe not. ROYAL I don’t like the way you’re treating Raleigh.

Will you advise me? RICHIE I don’t know. What do you want to do? (CONTINUED) . Margot stops. that’s what they used to say. Richie comes out of the coop and goes over to RALEIGH (CONT’D) I’m utterly devastated. ROYAL (CONT’D) It’s not right. ROOF. and perhaps you understand her better than anyone else. EXT. RALEIGH I believe she’s having an affair. ROYAL (hesitates) Well. RALEIGH Richard. She says in a quiet voice: MARGOT No. I didn’t.66. I don’t know where else to turn. They look at each other for a long minute. may I confide in you? RICHIE (pause) OK. I know you’re terribly close to Margot. You used to be a genius. Raleigh. Margot turns to Royal. Raleigh stands at the edge of the roof looking down to the ground while Richie cleans the empty falcon’s coop. Margot goes into her room and closes the door. DAY. anyway. dammit. RICHIE I doubt it. She stands still with her back to Royal. Silence. CONTINUED: ROYAL You’re two-timing him with that bloodsucker Eli Cash. RALEIGH Nevertheless.

His IV bag hangs on a rolling stand beside him.67. INT. RICHIE Who do you think it might be? RALEIGH (hesitates) I don’t know. Chas covers the receiver with his hand. He stares at Richie’s bloody hand. DAY. CHAS’ BEDROOM. perhaps -RICHIE Find the guy and get him? RALEIGH (pause) Well. I thought. CHAS What do you need? ROYAL (hesitates) Nothing. Three secretaries make copies and take messages. Ari and Uzi sit working with a calculator and a ledger pad at a small desk in the corner. huh? CHAS Please. INT. You got them crunching numbers for you. ETHELINE’S STUDY. CONTINUED: RALEIGH Well. the Xerox machine and a television and VCR on a cart. at the moment. Royal stands in the garden. Royal says to them: ROYAL Let’s go down to Little Tokyo and get some firecrackers. (CONTINUED) . Royal comes down the hallway and looks in the doorway to Chas’ room. He kicks it. I thought we might -Richie punches his hand through the attic window. DAY. Chas is on the telephone. no. Raleigh looks shocked. four telephones. Etheline sits at her desk writing numbers on little bits of pottery and recording it in a notebook. don’t come in this room. looking in the window. There are five computers. A messenger waits for him to sign a document.

CONTINUED: ROYAL Chassie’s got those boys cooped up like a pair of jackrabbits. RICHIE’S BEDROOM. I’m talking about putting a brick through the other guy’s windshield. Silence. INT.) Royal. But you can’t raise boys to be scared of life. ROYAL I know it. Royal.) We take boxing and self-defense class. you don’t. Ari and Uzi jaywalk through heavy traffic. Ari and Uzi ride horses in the park. Ethel. DAY. ROYAL I’m not talking about dance lessons.68. ROYAL (pause) No. Royal.) What do you mean? MONTAGE: (Royal. You got to brew some recklessness into them. Royal leads them at a full gallop down a ravine and over a stone wall.O. Ari and Uzi jump off a high scaffold into the indoor pool at the 375th Street Y.O. Ari says over the intercom: ARI (V. Royal pushes a button to talk. Ari and Uzi laugh continuously throughout the following montage. Royal listens to Ari over the intercom while Pagoda does yoga exercises in the corner: ARI (V. Ari and Uzi race go-carts up and down loading ramps and in between fork-lifts in a large warehouse. ETHELINE He has his reasons. ETHELINE I think that’s terrible advice. Royal. I’m talking about taking it out and chopping it up. (CONTINUED) .

Chas hangs up the telephone.What is that? Royal licks his finger and rubs away the blood. ROYAL (indicating Pagoda) He saved my life. CHAS’ BEDROOM. How’s ROYAL Just stepped out to get some air. CHAS Where’ve you been? Chas goes to the doorway. the -CHAS (concerned) What’s that? Chas points to a spot of dried blood on Uzi’s forehead. Stuck me in the gut with a shiv. DAY. and he carried me to the hospital on his back. There was a price on my head. He glares at Ari. DAY. No. Royal. and he was a hired assassin. Holy shit. ROYAL That’s not -. Thirty years ago. He sees Royal. Ari and Uzi throw water balloons at a gypsy cab. Ari and Uzi ride on the back of a speeding garbage truck. CONTINUED: Royal. I was knifed at a bazaar in Calcutta. (CONTINUED) . Ari and Uzi walking by the hallway. ROYAL He did. Uzi and Royal. ROYAL (CONT’D) That’s dog’s blood. Ari and Uzi hide cartons of chocolate milk under their jackets and walk quickly out the door of a bodega. Royal. you know. STREET.69. The three secretaries are still at work. and Chas is on the telephone. EXT. ARI Who stabbed you? Royal motions to Pagoda again. INT.

CHAS Stay away from my children. Chas grabs Royal by the arm and pulls him into the closet across the hall. I haven’t been in here in years. covered with dust. And I think you’re having a nervous breakdown. Royal stands alone in the dark. EXT. by the way. understand? Do you ROYAL (looking around) My God. ETHELINE How are you feeling? ROYAL Oh. PARK. in shelves up to the ceiling. CONTINUED: Chas frowns. I think -Chas turns off the light. DAY. I am. There are hundreds of board games. (sincerely) I’d like to thank you for raising our children. most of which are about thirty years old. He looks to Royal. He switches the light back on and looks down at the floor. Royal Royal and Etheline walk along a path through the park. CLOSET. Chas closes the door and turns on the light. Scrapping and yelling. Royal hesitates. DAY. The stuffed boar’s head is under the bottom shelf. INT. and closes the door.70. in the corner. goes out of the closet. I’m having a ball. ROYAL (CONT’D) There you are. rolls his hanging IV bag at his side. Loving every minute with this damn crew. (CONTINUED) . He smiles. CHAS (screams) Are you listening to me? ROYAL Yes. Mixing it up. I don’t believe you’ve recovered from Rachael’s death.

didn’t you? ETHELINE I tried to. though. ROYAL (CONT’D) What’s so funny? ETHELINE Nothing. but I’m ashamed of myself. ROYAL I’m not kidding. I’ll tell you one thing. anyway. ETHELINE Nothing. and if -Etheline laughs. and guts than any bob-tailed fox I ever damn hunted. then why didn’t you give a damn about us. (CONTINUED) . Royal? Why didn’t you care? ROYAL I don’t know. CONTINUED: ETHELINE (pause) OK.71. But I’ll take it as a compliment. and fire. You’ve got more grit. tell me. They look at each other for a long minute. ROYAL (CONT’D) You always put them first. Lately. it’s nobody’s fault. What? Royal smiles. ROYAL Goddammit. ROYAL No. Just these little expressions of yours. don’t do that to yourself. Or. Etheline shrugs. ROYAL (pause) I don’t know what you’re talking about. it doesn’t -ETHELINE Well. I’m the one who failed them. (pause) Plus. I feel like maybe I didn’t do such a great job.

I’ll call you in the morning. CONTINUED: (2) ROYAL (CONT’D) You’re true blue. Etheline turns around and goes back up the steps. EVENING. Henry watches her. CUT TO: Henry with two bags of groceries in his arms. Etheline goes inside and closes the door. You really are. Ethel. He looks sad and stunned. (pause) Actually.” Etheline and Henry come down the front steps of the Tenenbaum house. HENRY Well. Henry is dressed in black tie. ETHELINE (hesitates) I don’t think the timing’s right for that. Silence. watching from behind a stone wall above the path. Henry frowns. It says “Chapter Six.72. The ends of a pair of theatre tickets stick out of his breast pocket. Etheline stops at the bottom of the steps. INSERT: Page 147 of The Royal Tenenbaums. I hope you’re right. EXT. But I don’t. SIDEWALK. ETHELINE Well. Pagoda holds a gypsy cab for them at the curb. I’d agree if I thought he was really going to die in six weeks. HENRY I’d like you to talk to Royal about us. if you don’t mind. Henry. I don’t believe I’m going to join you tonight. . He listens as Royal says: ROYAL (CONT’D) How’s your love life? ETHELINE None of your business. Pagoda watches Henry.

INT. NIGHT. Henry looks at him blankly. Royal has a half-eaten cheeseburger in his hand. Henry stands at the counter reading the Wall Street Journal. ROYAL HENRY You didn’t? No. Royal comes into the kitchen eating a cheeseburger. CLOSET. HENRY (long pause) Coltrane? What? ROYAL HENRY Did you just call me Coltrane? No. The next morning. He has on reading glasses. Royal snaps his fingers. Coltrane. He whispers excitedly: ROYAL She said that? Pagoda nods. ROYAL (CONTINUED) . Royal sits on a stool. DAY. INT. ROYAL Are you trying to steal my woman? HENRY (pause) I beg your pardon? ROYAL You heard me. ROYAL Can I ask you something? HENRY (pause) OK.73. KITCHEN. Royal and Pagoda stand together in the board-game-filled closet drinking Martinis and smoking cigarettes. ROYAL (CONT’D) We got the sucker on the ropes.

yeah? Right on! Sit down! What? ROYAL HENRY ROYAL Royal starts doing a little dance in front of Henry. I don’t. Henry waits for Royal to continue. Royal stands up. ROYAL (CONT’D) What’d you say? HENRY I said. would you? HENRY You don’t think so? ROYAL No. Royal. If you think -ROYAL You want to talk some jive? Henry hesitates. sit down. CONTINUED: HENRY (pause) OK. ROYAL But if I did? Silence. He screams: ROYAL (CONT’D) I’ll talk some jive like you never heard! HENRY (yelling) Oh. HENRY (seething) Listen. ROYAL (CONT’D) You wouldn’t be able to do anything about it. ROYAL (CONT’D) I’ll talk some jive with you. He looks puzzled. goddammit! (CONTINUED) .74.

Henry walks out of the room. determined look on his face. ROYAL Don’t play semantics with me. darkly: Royal stops dancing. Henry reads the label on the bottle while he places a call. DAY. He has the bottle of pills in his hand. INT. At Colby General. HENRY Hello. STAIRWAY. CONTINUED: (2) ROYAL Oh. Royal goes to the refrigerator and opens it. INT.75. He says ROYAL (CONT’D) I want you out of my house. McClure. TELEPHONE ROOM. Etheline looks to Henry. He takes out a jar of peanut butter and a jar of grape jelly. HENRY This is not your house. I’m calling in regards to a Dr. Nothing. INSERT: The pill. ROYAL She stands in the doorway. I want your raggedy ass back on the -ETHELINE What’s going on here? Henry and Royal look to Etheline. It has pink and blue sparkles all over it and the word “Tic-Tac” printed on the side. Henry takes out a pill and examines it. . INT. The name of the patient is Royal Tenenbaum. RICHIE’S BEDROOM. Henry goes into Richie’s room and takes a bottle of Royal’s pills off the night stand. Henry jumps to his feet. He goes back out of the room. Henry goes up the stairs with a cold. DAY. Yes. I heard you. DAY.

PETER Right. Henry stands in the doorway. haven’t they? Eli nods sadly. Margot and Royal are watching Eli on ROYAL Change it. HENRY How much is he paying you? Pagoda looks scared. CUT TO: Richie’s room. you know. Pagoda lies on a hammock listening to Indian music on a portable record player. DAY. Two dalmation mice dart out across the floor. Richie comes into the room. They run under the radiator.76. ROYAL You think we could get somebody to come over here and kill some of these mice for us? (CONTINUED) . He is Peter Bradley. distinguished-looking man in his fifties. RICHIE Richie goes into the closet. There is a knock on the door. PAGODA’S ROOM. A small room with an Indian pattern on the wallpaper. Royal frowns. television. His hand is wrapped with bloody bandages. ELI Well. The host is a tall. INT. Margot looks concerned. MARGOT What’d you do to your hand? Nothing. The door opens. They sit at a round table lit at the center of a pitch-black room. INSERT: A television set tuned in to an interview show. and then it opens. Eli is his guest. Bullshit. He stares at Pagoda. I grew up with the Tenenbaum family. They’ve come on hard times now.

77. he invented them. Or. INSERT: The television set. ELI (CONT’D) Holy shit.S. Richie drags a large trunk out of the closet. Why? ELI Hm. Right. PETER Not a success. CONTINUED: MARGOT No. PETER (looking around) What? (CONTINUED) . intercom and presses a button on it. Henry goes over to the HENRY Etheline? Would you mind coming up here for a minute. Pops? HENRY You’ll see. tell him to stick them in a fucking cage or something. ROYAL What’s cooking. Those belong to Chas. Eli’s interview continues. Henry and Pagoda come into the room. your previous novel -ELI Wildcattin’. Well. Wildcattin’ was written in a kind of obsolete vernacular. please? Royal looks at Henry suspiciously.) (on the intercom) OK. much like the -Eli freezes. He looks quickly across the room. ROYAL Well. anyway. PETER Now. ETHELINE (O.

he doesn’t. I’ve seen it. He braces himself against the edge of the table. PAGODA He has the cancer. HENRY Hold on a minute. Pagoda looks worried. What the hell kind of way to act is that? RICHIE (pause) He’s on drugs. Etheline and Chas come into the room. and walks off the set. MARGOT (worried) I’ll be right back. Henry steps in front of the television set and turns it off. Royal sits up. Peter Bradley watches him go. He turns to Royal and points at him. HENRY (angrily) No. (MORE) (CONTINUED) . please. Silence. HENRY (CONT’D) Pagoda has something to say. Ari. CUT TO: Everyone watching in Richie’s bedroom. PETER (CONT’D) Are you all right? ELI (concerned) Why is it so dense in here? Peter hesitates. Peter looks concerned. Uzi and Buckley follow them. stands up. ROYAL Son of a bitch. HENRY (CONT’D) I know what stomach cancer looks like. Eli removes his microphone. Henry stares at Royal.78. Chas is eating a sandwich. Margot goes to the telephone. Everyone looks to Pagoda. They look stunned. CONTINUED: (2) A look of sheer horror crosses Eli’s face.

Etheline looks to Royal. He says ROYAL Time to come clean. The pain is excruciating.79. pal. Chas crushes his sandwich in his hand. ROYAL I guess we’re back on the street. Etheline looks to Pagoda. Can you send a taxi to 111 Archer Avenue? Right away. HENRY (CONT’D) Not only is there no Dr. He looks to Pagoda. He goes into the bathroom and closes the door. shit. It closed in 1974. He sits down on the bed and picks up the phone. Chas hangs up. Thank you. ROYAL How would you know? HENRY My wife had it. No more lies. McClure at Colby General. He is fully dressed in a suit. He picks up one of his bottles of pills off the night stand and leaves the rest. please. CHAS Yes. Pagoda looks uneasy. CONTINUED: (3) HENRY (CONT’D) And you don’t eat three cheeseburgers a day with french fries when you’ve got it. He places a call. (CONTINUED) . PAGODA Ah. Henry turns to Etheline. regretfully: Royal looks to Pagoda. ETHELINE But why would he -Chas slams his hand against the bathroom door as hard as he can. Royal pulls out his IV and the other tubes that are attached to him. and he is zipping up a small leather bag. man. Silence. She frowns. Royal comes out of the bathroom. ETHELINE Were you part of this? HENRY Of course he was. there’s no Colby General.

He turns and stands in ROYAL (CONT’D) know I’m the bad guy on this I just want to say that the days have been the best six probably. front of everyone.O. Royal realized that it was true. ETHELINE But we hadn’t spoken in seven years. Royal swallows one of his pills.80. Plus. Royal begins to gather his possessions. Or. I do have high blood pressure. NARRATOR (V. DAY. I one. ROYAL I know. I did some malpractice work for him. HALLWAY. though. sad expression crosses Royal’s face. CONTINUED: (4) Pagoda stares at Royal bitterly. A strange. ETHELINE (CONT’D) What was the point? ROYAL (pause) I thought maybe I could win you back. anyway. and I got kicked out of my hotel. Royal comes out of Richie’s room with his suitcases. my whole life. I was broke. Pete’s owed me a favor. RICHIE How’d you get all these medical supplies? ROYAL (pause) A guy at St. but last six days of. Richie points at the hospital bed and life-support machines. Look. INT. Royal? Royal stops. I thought I could get rid of Henry and keep things status quo. (CONTINUED) .) Immediately after making this statement. Etheline stands at the end of the hall. ETHELINE Why’d you do this to us.

DAY. Royal nods. MARGOT (pause) Neither are you. I really do. past Margot and Henry. Royal’s suitcases are beside him. STREET. A gypsy cab pulls over to the curb. Royal puts his hands in his pockets. STAIRWELL. with tears in ETHELINE (CONT’D) Goodbye. Royal stops in front of him.81. Chassie. Etheline stares at him angrily. Margot and Henry stand at the top of the steps. I feel like a different person. Royal points to Henry. RICHIE You were never dying. (CONTINUED) . I Royal walks past him and goes out the front DAY. EXT. ROYAL Take it easy on those boys. Richie and Royal stand on the sidewalk. in the front doorway. Royal and Margot look at each other. He begins to cry. ROYAL (CONT’D) He’s not your father. He stares into space. ROYAL You know. door. CONTINUED: ETHELINE (pause) You’re a bastard. Chas stands at the bottom of the stairs and watches Royal come down with his suitcases. this illness. Royal waves to the driver. Royal. this closeness to death. Royal turns and walks down the stairs. her eyes. Margot closes the door. Richie shakes his head. Dad. ROYAL (smiles) But I’m going to live. It’s been very profound for me. into the house. He turns away and goes up the steps. INT. don’t want this to happen to you. Chas hesitates. Richie.

But. dammit. Pagoda pours some iodine on a cotton ball and applies it to Royal’s knife wound. ROYAL How you doing. pal? Pagoda drops his suitcases to the ground. Pagoda’s teeth flash as he goes over to Royal and stabs him with a penknife. Royal says to the driver: ROYAL (CONT’D) The 375th Street Y. Royal screams. 375TH STREET Y. CONTINUED: The front door of the house opens.” INT. ROYAL Everyone’s against me. PAGODA You son of a bitch. door says “375th Street Y. man. INSERT: Page 198 of The Royal Tenenbaums. ROYAL Goddammit! That’s the last time I get knifed by you! You hear me? Pagoda helps Royal to his feet. An extremely small room with a low ceiling and a single bed. The gypsy cab driver watches blankly.82. I want to be loved by this family. EXT. He collects his suitcases. Pagoda comes down the steps with two suitcases. 375TH STREET Y. DAY. PAGODA You can’t blame them. ROYAL (CONT’D) How much money you got? (CONTINUED) . He falls on the ground. Royal leans on Pagoda as they get into the gypsy cab. Royal stands in front of a mirror while Pagoda stitches up the knife-wound in his side. He looks furious. He clutches his side. A sign next to the It says “Chapter Seven. please. ROYAL I know. DAY. Royal grimaces.” A huge building that looks like a castle. He holds a bottle of iodine in one hand and a box of bandages in the other.

NIGHT. ROYAL (frowns) What do you mean? Pagoda nods. Henry refills Etheline’s glass. please. HENRY (relieved) You’re right. (CONTINUED) . and there is a gentle breeze. two bottles of wine. Henry’s bedroom is filled with paintings and sculptures from the fifties and sixties. Let’s just try and have a nice time. Henry looks uneasy. It’s awkward sitting here in our pajamas and everything. INT. He clinks his glass against hers and takes a small sip. and three candles on it. All right. OK. HENRY’S APARTMENT. HENRY Would you like another glass of wine? ETHELINE Yes. CONTINUED: PAGODA I don’t have. ROYAL (CONT’D) We’ll figure something out. Silence. Etheline says suddenly: ETHELINE (CONT’D) Maybe we’re rushing things. The doors to the balcony are open. We don’t have to do this right now. ETHELINE Henry gets up and changes the record to a more upbeat number. ROYAL (CONT’D) You got to be kidding me. They look at each other fondly for a minute. She drinks her whole glass all at once. He puts on a slow jazz record and sits down across from Etheline at a small table with a vase of roses. How’re we supposed to pay for the damn room? Pagoda looks up at Royal coldly.83. Henry has on pale-blue silk pajamas. Henry. You’re broke? Royal looks furious. Etheline wears a cream silk nightgown.

CONTINUED: HENRY Yes. He looks to Etheline. a bowl of strawberries. He stops a few feet away from Margot. OK. Henry quickly strikes a match and sets the crepe suzette on fire. I should go. MARGOT (pause) ELI OK. Margot waits in the middle of the bridge. and a crepe suzette on it. and there’s no need for us to force anything. He gets up and turns off the record player. what? MARGOT OK. There’s no hurry. offer you some dessert? Henry points to a dessert cart with a lemon meringue pie. His napkin catches on fire. ETHELINE No. Let’s just ETHELINE Actually. Etheline picks up her overnight bag off a chair and goes into the bathroom. EXT. DAY. two cheesecakes. BRIDGE. I’m not in love with you. Henry nods. and he dips it in his water glass. His clothes look severely dishevelled. I think we’re both a little uneasy. ELI I’m not in love with you any more. Eli walks towards her from the opposite bank. A footbridge over the river. I should go. (CONTINUED) . Henry sits alone. Silence. HENRY Can I. His face is smeared with dirt and traces of paint.84. MARGOT I didn’t know you ever were. I think you’re right. Etheline hesitates. at least. either. He looks disappointed. a chocolate mousse. ELI Let’s not make this any more difficult than it already is.

You’re in love with Richie. Yes. (CONTINUED) . PRIVATE DETECTIVE’S OFFICE. The detective hands Raleigh a manila folder. CONTINUED: ELI I know. MARGOT Do you send my mother your clippings? Eli hesitates. I assure you. gentlemen? RALEIGH Very little. He opens and begins to read. stop ridiculing me. MARGOT Your reviews aren’t that good. Richie looks over his shoulder. Eli turns away and looks sadly out at the river. Silence. DAY. Raleigh. Which is sick and gross. A large man in a coat and tie takes photographs of Margot and Eli with a telephoto lens. He is a detective. two hundred yards away. CUT TO: A second bridge. DETECTIVE Would you like to examine the report? RALEIGH We would. over and stands beside him. Margot nods. DETECTIVE How much do you already know. Margot goes A small room on the 30th floor of an office building. ELI But the sales are. Richie and Dudley sit across a desk from the large man in the coat and tie.85. MARGOT (CONT’D) And your grades in -ELI Please. rather. INT. ELI (CONT’D) You never gave me the time of day until I started getting good reviews.

86. (In each of the following images. Margot opens a window and looks out at the Eifel Tower. He has on warpaint and wears a large tusk in his nose. Richie looks stunned. CONTINUED: MONTAGE: Margot at age twelve buys a pack of cigarettes in a bodega. Margot stands in a pool of water facing a young tribesman in New Guinea. and Margot runs her hands through the girl’s hair. DETECTIVE . eating a croissant. She carries a small suitcase. Silence. next to the falcon’s coop. . RALEIGH (CONT’D) She smokes.a tough-looking Irishman on the deck of a ferry.Eli in a deserted subway train going full speed at night. A man dressed in a black shirt with a priest’s collar places a string of shells around Margot’s neck. There is a goat in the doorway. Margot sits in a make-up chair at a television studio. . Margot smiles at him mischievously. Peter Bradley comes up behind her and puts his hands down her shirt.a Puerto Rican teenager in the back seat of a taxi. Margot makes out with: . CUT TO: Raleigh turning to the last page of the report. She shimmies down the gutter and runs across the lawn. Yes. Margot smokes a cigarette. leaning against the chimney. She holds hands with one of them while he lights a large brown-paper-wrapped marijuana cigarette. She wears a bra and a slip. She smokes one on the roof of the house. . The girl puts her arms around Margot’s waist. Another man has a small machine gun. Margot stands inside a torch-lit shack among a group of dancing Rastafarians in Jamaica. He closes the folder and looks to Richie. A topless girl appears next to her. and the ocean glimmers outside.a skinny guy with a Mohawk on a city bus. Margot kisses him on the mouth.) Margot climbs out the window of a girls’ dormitory.

DAY. INT. He holds a pair of scissors in his hand. by the way? MANAGER I’ll inform you of my decision at the appropriate time. closes the door. BATHROOM.87. Dusty. Richie walks by in a bathrobe. I’ll contact you in the next twenty-four hours. ROYAL Put in a good word for us. He picks up the razor. takes a deep breath. I get it. Hot water runs full blast in the shower and the sink. Pagoda. Dusty and the manager of the hotel sit at a table in the laundry room of the Lindbergh Palace. INT. BASEMENT. He goes into the bathroom. MANAGER All right. He pushes his hand back through his hair. Raleigh lies face down on the couch with his head buried in the cushions. No. He carries a pair of scissors. RALEIGH His voice is muffled. Richie stands in front of the mirror. Royal. INT. ROYAL I appreciate that. Everything seems to be in order. DUSTY I already did. Which way are you leaning. DAY. He opens the medicine cabinet and takes out a can of shaving cream and a straight razor. He covers his face with the shaving cream. He has clipped off his beard. and locks it. He looks back in the mirror. and says quietly: (CONTINUED) . RALEIGH’S LABORATORY. The manager is reviewing a typewritten document. He says quietly: DUDLEY You want to play some word games or do some experiments on me or anything? Raleigh answers without moving. DAY. Dudley walks over to him with a box of building blocks.

She sees Dudley. A doctor gives him an injection and says to Etheline: DOCTOR He’ll probably sleep for several hours. CUT TO: The bathroom door slamming open. leaves the room. He sits down on the floor. Dudley bursts into the room. She sees blood on him. MARGOT How do you feel? The doctor (CONTINUED) . Chas. four times. His Who? INT. She rushes over and grabs his arms. arms are covered with bandages.88. Dudley? DUDLEY (pause) DAY. Margot holds Richie’s hand. Dudley screams hysterically. She throws open the closet door and grabs her coat. She looks around frantically. MONTAGE: Three paramedics race down a corridor pushing Richie on a gurney. along his left forearm. He switches hands with the razor and slashes his other wrist. Everyone is gathered around Richie in his hospital bed. The floor is flooded with water and blood. Silence. Raleigh and Dudley run beside him. Etheline hangs up the telephone and runs into the hallway. She has tears all over her face. Etheline nods. Blood runs into the sink. MARGOT Where is he. Richie slices the razor deeply. They are covered with blood. and then I’ll come back to check on him. He looks horrified. Buckley has his head out the window. Margot bursts through the doors of the emergency room. CONTINUED: RICHIE I’m going to kill myself tomorrow. Richie is slumped in the corner with shaving cream all over his face. Ari and Uzi hold on as Anwar weaves the BMW in and out of traffic. HOSPITAL ROOM.

thanks. said to let him sleep. RICHIE CHAS Could you paraphrase it for us? RICHIE I don’t think so. Margot sits next to Raleigh. That’s enough. ETHELINE Are you in any pain? RICHIE Not really. CHAS Is it dark? RICHIE Of course it’s dark. DAY. Ari and Uzi sit on Chas’ lap. You did? MARGOT RICHIE Yeah. (CONTINUED) .89. Raleigh stares into space. RICHIE I wrote a suicide note. Right after I regained consciousness. INT. WAITING AREA. Everyone looks slightly confused. It’s a suicide ETHELINE All right. The doctor The corridor outside Richie’s room. Etheline fills out some insurance forms. CHAS Can we read it? No. note. CONTINUED: RICHIE Fine. CHAS Why’d you try to kill yourself? ETHELINE Don’t press him right now.

ETHELINE Oh. She reaches into her pocket and takes out a pack of cigarettes. ETHELINE What’s he talking about? MARGOT It doesn’t matter. RALEIGH (CONT’D) And a light. MARGOT Silence. Everyone looks surprised and extremely uncomfortable. She gives one to Raleigh. RALEIGH May I have a cigarette? What? MARGOT RALEIGH Shall I repeat the question? MARGOT You don’t smoke. please? Margot takes out some matches and lights Raleigh’s cigarette.90. Everyone looks at Raleigh and Margot. my goodness. (CONTINUED) . I know. RALEIGH She’s balling Eli Cash. He puts it in his mouth. RALEIGH Many times over. I’m sorry. Raleigh stares at Margot in silence. MARGOT RALEIGH And you’ve nearly killed your poor brother. RALEIGH (bitterly) I bloody well know that. Margot sighs. CONTINUED: RALEIGH You’ve made a cuckold of me.

HOSPITAL. Etheline sees him and stands up. Henry Sherman comes in. He swats at the necktie.91. Pagoda stands behind him. Three hours later. INT. They are both dressed in hotel elevator-operator uniforms. EXT. She hugs him tightly and starts to cry. As he unfolds them. Etheline puts her arms around him. please. out the door. I think you should quit. Henry senses something wrong in his peripheral vision and looks confused. Margot nods. ETHELINE How long have you been a smoker? MARGOT (pause) Twenty-two years. he unintentionally clamps them to his necktie and pulls his necktie up to his temple. STREET. Raleigh stands up and walks away. He looks to Etheline with an embarrassed expression. He says earnestly: HENRY How can I help? Etheline begins to point to Henry’s necktie suspended near his ear. NIGHT. NIGHT. hurling his glasses off his face and on to the floor. Silence. He goes over to her. down the hall. but she hesitates. He starts to put on his glasses. ROYAL Richie Tenenbaum. The door opens at the end of the hall. Margot lights a cigarette for herself. Etheline looks disturbed. CONTINUED: (2) RALEIGH (CONT’D) Thank you. Your name? NURSE (CONTINUED) . Henry picks up his glasses and puts them back on. Royal speaks anxiously to a nurse at the registration desk. Royal and Pagoda get out and walk quickly into the building. A gypsy cab stops in front of the hospital. ETHELINE Well.

Silence. He hesitates. EXT. sir. She frowns. ROYAL (CONT’D) Where’re you going? Silence.92. Royal looks puzzled. Royal looks very upset. he didn’t look half bad for a suicide. afternoon. ROYAL (hesitates) Why? What does it say there? don’t want me? I’m sorry. He’ll be in tomorrow Royal and Pagoda stand in front of the hospital. NIGHT. ROYAL I think if we shimmy up that gutter and jump across the window ledge we can pry open the ventilation shaft and -PAGODA There he is. CONTINUED: ROYAL Royal Tenenbaum. Royal and Pagoda watch it drive away. His arms are covered with bandages. She looks back to Royal. Richie looks to Royal and Pagoda. man. The doors open. Royal points to the edge of the roof. A bus pulls over in front of Richie. He sounds desperate. anyway. NURSE I’m afraid visiting hours are over. Richie gets on the bus. Pagoda points to Richie waiting at the bus stop on the corner. Burroughs. They NURSE I have to refer you to Dr. Royal calls out: Richie? ROYAL He sees their uniforms. He is dressed in surgical scrubs and bedroom slippers. SIDEWALK. (CONTINUED) . ROYAL (CONT’D) I have to say. Attempted suicide. The nurse looks down at her registration book.

She seems worried. leans against the wall. (CONTINUED) . Richie looks into the tent. She has a Rolling Stones record in her hand. MARGOT Well. Hello? MARGOT (CONT’D) Richie looks at the seventeen paintings of Margot hanging in the corner. An unfinished eighteenth. Margot is sitting on the floor next to a record player smoking a cigarette. BUS. RICHIE What are you doing in my tent? MARGOT (hesitates) Just listening to some records. NIGHT. She looks startled. INT. shouldn’t you be on some kind of suicide watch or something? RICHIE (pause) Probably. He puts his arm around Royal’s shoulder. INT. Richie walks in and sees the lamp glowing inside his tent. RICHIE I checked myself out. NIGHT. Margot calls out from inside. TENT. with Margot slightly older. BALLROOM. MARGOT (CONT’D) I thought you were supposed to be in the hospital. Margot puts out her cigarette. The ballroom on the top floor of the Tenenbaum house. NIGHT. An old city busy with trash on the floor and graffiti spraypainted on the walls. Richie sits in the back row and rides downtown.93. MARGOT Who’s there? Richie does not respond. Richie goes to the tent at the center of the room. INT. CONTINUED: Pagoda nods.

94. crisscrossing stitches and dried blood. and he came out to me in a canoe. Richie nods. MARGOT (sighs) I know. Richie unwraps one of his bandages. Poor Eli. We were only married for nine days. I guess that was the attraction. CONTINUED: Richie goes into the tent and sits down Indian-style in front of Margot. That looks horrible. RICHIE I heard about your ex-husband. She puts on the Rolling Stones record. Richie. Richie says quietly: RICHIE I have to tell you something. I was swimming. MARGOT (pause) Desmond? RICHIE (hesitates) I guess so. He wraps the bandage back around his arm. Margot sighs. if you know what I mean. MARGOT Jesus. Silence. I met him in the ocean. we mostly just talked about you. MARGOT How many stitches did you get? RICHIE I don’t know. RICHIE (surprised) You did? MARGOT Yeah. It plays quietly. You want to see? Margot nods. I didn’t get his name. Anyway. RICHIE (nods) And I heard about Eli. His arm is covered with jagged. Margot looks stricken. MARGOT Yeah. (CONTINUED) .

Richie kisses Margot on the mouth. Margot looks back into the tent. Margot nods. MARGOT You’re not going to do it again. MARGOT (sadly) I love you. (CONTINUED) . but it’s not your fault. sleeping bag. MARGOT (CONT’D) Why’d you do it? Because of me? RICHIE Yeah. Richie sits alone for a minute. She kisses Richie’s hand. Richie. and she kisses him back. MARGOT Let’s lie down for a minute. RICHIE I can’t stop thinking about you. I went away for a year. She starts crying.95. Richie lies down on the cot. and it only got worse. They listen to the music for a minute. too. CONTINUED: (2) MARGOT What’s that? RICHIE I love you. Margot gets up and goes out of the tent. She smooths back his hair. I don’t know what to do. Margot sighs. isn’t it? Richie nods. Richie looks worried. MARGOT I think we’re just going to have to be secretly in love with each other and leave it at that. Margot looks at his Boy Scout MARGOT (CONT’D) This is the one we took to the museum. She puts her hands on the back of his head. are you? RICHIE (pause) I doubt it. She lies down next to Richie and puts her arm around his shoulder. Richie pulls away from her and looks into her eyes.

He looks exhausted and depressed. Henry’s book and Eli’s book. One of the businessmen hands Royal a dollar as they walk out into the lobby. ROYAL (CONT’D) He nods. We just started. The elevator goes up. RICHIE (CONT’D) So you’re elevator operators now. The doors open. Richie picks up the stack of books off the table next to his cot. He hangs it on the wall in its place. elevator. waves to Richie. It says “Chapter Eight. sir. INT. Royal stands with his back to Richie. CONTINUED: (3) They look at each other for a long minute. A dalmation mouse appears and crawls among them. but we’ll get a bump when we join the union. Royal The doors of another elevator open. ROYAL (CONT’D) What floor? RICHIE It doesn’t matter. standing in front of the elevator. The book on top is Family of Geniuses. (CONTINUED) . Royal sees Richie looks surprised. DAY. ELEVATOR. He spreads them out on the floor among his Matchbox cars and tennis trophies. Pagoda Richie looks at him. Richie nods. Royal is dressed in his elevator-operator uniform. Richie comes downstairs in his pajamas. He carries the stuffed boar’s head. INSERT: Page 230 of The Royal Tenenbaums. The record ends. INT. Pagoda hesitates. Royal closes the doors and pulls a lever. Then there are Margot’s books. He Richie waves back. He steps into Royal’s Going up? Richie looks back to Royal. Margot turns away and goes out the tent.” The next morning. ROYAL Yeah. The elevator at the Lindbergh Palace.96. is the operator. Raleigh’s book. He takes three well-dressed businessmen down to the lobby. DAY. ROYAL Thank you. HALLWAY.

ROYAL Does she know? Uh-huh. Royal turns around quickly and looks to Richie. CONTINUED: RICHIE What made you decide to do that? ROYAL Well. Richie nods. looking out at the city. Silence. in answer to your question. I guess I’m trying to prove I can pay my dues and what-not. ROYAL He says quietly: He nods. RICHIE (CONT’D) Well. Silence. RICHIE ROYAL Since when? RICHIE Since always. But. just hope somebody knows. I RICHIE You asked me why I choked out there that day. (CONTINUED) . Royal and Richie stand on the edge of the roof. Sure. ROYAL Margot Tenenbaum? Yeah. ROOF. I think I know the answer. we’re broke.97. Royal looks surprised and moved. DAY. and I wanted your advice. EXT. RICHIE ROYAL And what’s her feeling about it? RICHIE I think she feels confused.

but then what isn’t these days. Pop. Silence. you love each other. RICHIE I know you do. but I just don’t. It’s probably We’re not related by ROYAL (CONT’D) I don’t know. Maybe it works. Royal nods. ROYAL No. His expression changes. RICHIE I don’t think so. CONTINUED: ROYAL I can understand that. ROYAL I wish I had a little more to offer in that department. Why not? Hell. myself. ROYAL (CONT’D) You know what? Don’t listen to me. I never understood her. I wish I knew what to tell you. He stares down at the ground. RICHIE (pause) That’s OK. He keeps looking down at the ground. Royal shrugs.98. right? Richie nods. so -Royal stops short. ROYAL (pause) That’s true. takes a deep breath. blood. (CONTINUED) He . Royal looks very sad. and nobody knows what’s going to happen. I never understood any of us. I do. it’s not. illegal. ROYAL (CONT’D) It’s still frowned upon. He says quietly: ROYAL (CONT’D) Do you still consider me your father? RICHIE Sure. Royal nods.

ROYAL Jiminy Cricket. He flew right in RICHIE Yeah. CONTINUED: (2) ROYAL I don’t blame you. ROYAL He smooths out the Richie slowly reaches out to the falcon. Richie looks off into the distance. He hesitates. He must have a goddamn radar in his brain. The falcon is Richie and Royal ride down in the elevator. ROYAL Well. and -Mordecai? RICHIE Royal looks up. Richie frowns. but now he has white feathers on his neck. feathers on its neck and says softly: RICHIE You came back. He frowns. Richie seems uncertain. ROYAL (CONT’D) She’s a great looking girl. RICHIE I’m not so sure this is Mordecai. the son of a bitch must be molting. and she’s smart as a whip. Royal and Richie watch as it lands on the railing in front of them. RICHIE I need your help with something else. He seems frightened. by the way. ROYAL What do you mean? here. perched on Richie’s arm.99. Royal and Richie study the falcon. (CONTINUED) . A falcon flies in a low circle around the building. ELEVATOR. DAY. Holy shit. Royal looks up at the sky. Silence. INT.

(CONTINUED) . What’s the situation? RICHIE Well. It accelerates and starts shaking violently. They are dressed in their elevator-operator uniforms. ELI (CONT’D) I guess Margot and your mother couldn’t make it. Eli has yellow powder on his nose. ELI (pause) Is it just you guys? Richie looks slightly confused. Eli and the Egyptian men stare at Richie. He yells into a walkie-talkie: Pagoda! ROYAL (CONT’D) Let’s hit it! RICHIE (hesitates) I didn’t mean right this second. Richie walks into the room. Royal and Pagoda follow him. There is a knock on the door. Eli sits on the couch in his study working on a jigsaw puzzle of the Beatles crossing Abbey Road. I think -Hang on. ELI’S STUDY.100. ROYAL Royal throws the lever on the elevator to full speed. Richie. RICHIE We want to take you to get some help. Yes? ELI Everyone looks up. He says awkwardly: ELI (CONT’D) Hey. Three Egyptian men are chopping up yellow powder on the table. CONTINUED: ROYAL (excitedly) You got it. DAY. Silence. INT. Eli looks confused and uneasy. The door opens and Richie looks inside. Electronic music blasts form the stereo.

ELI I don’t know what to say. RICHIE Where’s Sabrina? ELI (pause) They went back to England.101. RICHIE You don’t have to say anything. Royal looks to the Egyptian men. I heard about you Silence. Richie goes over and stands next to him. He sits down next to Eli. and Margot. Pagoda points to the door. Richie nods. He sees the bandages around Richie’s ELI (CONT’D) What happened there? RICHIE (hesitates) Nothing. (CONTINUED) . ROYAL Would you excuse us. Eli gets up and goes over to the window. arms. I can’t believe you would ask me that. RICHIE Are we still friends? Eli seems embarrassed and hurt. across from them. CONTINUED: Eli looks disappointed. He looks out at the backyard. I’m sorry. Egyptian men leave the room. ELI What do you mean? Are we? RICHIE Royal and Pagoda sit The ELI Of course. RICHIE It doesn’t matter. Eli looks deeply depressed. please? The Egyptian men hesitate.

over to the window and looks out. Eli opens the window. He looks to Richie. Eli goes into the bathroom and locks the door. Anyway. ROYAL Me. Royal and Richie rush over to the window. A waiter stands next to him. Let me just get my things. too. RICHIE (pause) But you didn’t have a drug problem then. and picks a dead leaf off a branch of a tree. Margot sits across from Royal. ICE-CREAM PARLOR. INT. They watch Eli drop to the ground. run into the street. ELI Yeah.102. Every booth is filled with divorced fathers and their young daughters. and hail a taxi. ELI (CONT’D) I wish you’d’ve done this for me when I was a kid. Margot? (CONTINUED) . What would you like. quietly: Eli looks to Royal. He Pagoda goes A room decorated like a birthday cake. please. CONTINUED: (2) ELI I always wanted to be a Tenenbaum. ROYAL I want to order some ice cream for my daughter. PAGODA There he goes. you know? Richie nods. Royal nods and says Me. I do recognize that I have a problem. and I want to get better. ELI But it doesn’t mean what it used to. Royal is dressed in his elevator-operator uniform. I really appreciate your coming over here now. He sees Eli running down the fire escape. has on socks but no shoes. but it still would’ve meant a lot to me. DAY. reaches out. does it? Richie shakes his head. too.

I think people want to hear that. one. Silence. MARGOT (sadly) I know it was. ROYAL (pause) It’s a trick question. Helen. SIDEWALK. Do they? Royal nods.103. He has a bunch of white flowers in his hand. minutes. CONTINUED: MARGOT I told you. MARGOT (CONT’D) You probably don’t even know my middle name. DAY. ROYAL Your brother’s all torn up inside. The waiter nods and walks away. (CONTINUED) . MARGOT Silence. MARGOT (hesitates) Well. Royal stands on the sidewalk in front of the Tenenbaum house. Royal looks frustrated. Royal sighs. He leans across the table and says urgently: ROYAL Can’t someone be a shit their whole life and want to repair the damage? I mean. MARGOT You don’t have ROYAL (surprised) That was my mother’s name. I guess. Nothing. MARGOT (CONT’D) I’ll have a butterscotch sundae. I only have five Margot sighs. so am I. EXT. but I’m not going to discuss it with you.

Royal hands Etheline the envelope. made it. Royal is waiting at the bus stop on the corner. ROYAL (CONT’D) This is Sanchez. ROYAL She says quietly: Etheline looks to Royal. Chas closes the window. Royal throws Ari looks out the window.104. Royal calls up to them: ROYAL Anybody feel like grabbing a couple of burgers and hitting the cemetery? Chas appears between Ari and Uzi. Uzi appears beside him. He stands alone with his hands in his pockets. Royal looks nervous. She opens the envelope. Royal goes over to them ROYAL I got you something. (CONTINUED) . ETHELINE What’s this? A divorce. It contains a sheaf of typwritten documents. From you? Yes. next to a small Mexican man in a windbreaker and a tie. Etheline and Henry come down the front steps of Henry’s building. CUT TO: Royal putting his bunch of flowers on Rachael’s grave. He walks away. He looks down to Royal. STREET. Ethel. Henry does not know what to say. a pebble at a window on the third floor. They both look depressed. Royal smiles. DAY. ETHELINE ROYAL Royal looks to Henry. Henry shrugs. CONTINUED: Anwar is asleep in the BMW parked at the curb. Royal has a large envelope in his hands. Actually. I Etheline and Henry look at Royal warily. EXT. Ari opens the window. She looks to Henry. He’s a notary public. Royal motions to the Mexican man. HENRY (hesitates) Hello. Etheline and Henry see him.

sir. but my son expropriated it from me. Sanchez puts several stamps and notations on it. (CONTINUED) . Sanchez. Etheline signs. Etheline signs. SANCHEZ You’re welcome. Thanks. Royal looks to Henry. Henry does not respond. please. He’s everything I’m not. I used to be a homeowner myself. ROYAL Sanchez just has to file the Royal signals to the bus driver. Royal hands Etheline a pen and points to a dotted line. papers. CONTINUED: SANCHEZ Hello. Etheline. And congratulations. ROYAL (CONT’D) And initial here. block. Royal looks up at Henry’s building. both of you. And here.105. ROYAL If you’ll just sign here. A city bus approaches from the next ROYAL (CONT’D) ROYAL (CONT’D) Here comes my bus. ROYAL (CONT’D) You own this building. Ethel. Royal hands the sheaf of documents to Sanchez. ETHELINE Are we divorced? Almost. ROYAL (CONT’D) I didn’t think so much of him at first. He turns back to Etheline. Henry? It’s magnificent. ROYAL (CONT’D) I love you. Etheline signs. but now I get it. don’t you.

It says “Chapter Nine. The door closes.” Ari. STREET. There are about fifty guests. EXT. and He looks back to Etheline. give them programs for the ceremony. Etheline Eli drives through a tunnel at top speed in the middle of the night. He whispers: ROYAL I got you some jawbreakers. and Henry stand watching with Sanchez. Uzi and Pagoda stand in front of the house with Buckley. The midshipman is Walter. He hugs Pagoda and kisses Ari and Uzi on the tops of their heads. runs to the bus. Electronic music blasts from the stereo. INT. and direct them to the front door. They hide them in their jackets. INT. He looks lost and sad. DAY. (CONTINUED) . jumps inside. Royal smiles at Ari and Uzi. receiving the wedding guests. DAY. CONTINUED: (2) Royal smiles. will you? Etheline hesitates. HENRY It’s slightly uneven. CUT TO: Page 258. INSERT: An invitation to Etheline’s and Henry’s wedding at the house on Archer Avenue. NIGHT. Royal slips Ari and Uzi each a large purple-and-green-striped jawbreaker. He has on sunglasses. The members of the wedding party are dressed in morning suits. He turns away suddenly. Half of them are black and half are white. It is nearly identical to the invitation on the cover of the first edition of The Royal Tenenbaums.106. She nods. ELI’S CAR. He looks around. and he is covered with grass and dirt. They help people out of their cars. Royal and Dusty get out of a gypsy cab. Henry studies his tie in the mirror. He yells: ROYAL (CONT’D) Take back Pagoda. CHAS’ BEDROOM. A twenty-one-year-old black Navy midshipman helps Henry finish tying his bow tie.

HENRY I know you are. Margot has a white plastic inhaler in her mouth. He nods. I’m a widower myself. HENRY I’m a widower. yeah. (pause) You know. HENRY Hello. RICHIE Nice to meet you. This is my son. Henry? RICHIE Richie cracks Henry looks to the door.107. I forgot. Richie. He and Walter shake hands. Chas looks to Henry. help me quit. CHAS Oh. Richie comes into the room. Chas. Walter Sherman. CHAS (CONT’D) So you’ve been married before? Yes. CHAS Henry’s your dad? Chas is standing in the doorway. Margot looks out the window at the guests arriving on the street while Etheline finishes her make-up. INT. Walter. ETHELINE Is it working? It’s supposed to (CONTINUED) . ETHELINE What are you chewing on? MARGOT My nicotine inhaler. CONTINUED: Henry unties his knot and starts from scratch. MARGOT’S BEDROOM. Walter hesitates. open the door and looks into the room. WALTER Nice to meet you. DAY.

MARGOT’S BEDROOM. ELI’S CAR. CUT TO: Ari. ROYAL Well. Royal and the priest look down the block. Uzi and Buckley watching frozen as Eli’s car races toward them. I’m half Hebrew. but the children are three-quarters MickCatholic. He is dressed in a morning suit. Royal and a very small Irish priest stand together at the top of the steps. He whispers: ELI Here I come. accelerates. INT. Eli’s convertible skids through the turn on to Archer Avenue.108. Ari and Uzi tie Buckley’s leash around a pole in front of the house. of course. Eli’s face is covered with Apache warpaint. DAY. He downshifts. I really don’t know. There is a tremendous crashing boom and the sound of shattering glass. Etheline rushes over next to Margot at the window. Royal looks panicked. ROYAL (pause) I believe so. He wears a distracted smile. and steers toward the Tenenbaum house. EXT. DAY. STREET. DAY. He looks to Ari and Uzi and hollers: Boys! ROYAL Royal jumps down the stairs. A car’s tires squeal around the corner. Royal and the priest frown. PRIEST (nods) So they were raised in the church. ETHELINE What was that? (CONTINUED) . INT. CONTINUED: MARGOT Not really.

There is also a crushed mailbox. DAY. DAY. He gets back up and keeps running. SIDEWALK. it to Eli. Eli puts it on. INT. they ran over Buckley. LIVING ROOM. ETHELINE Oh. CONTINUED: MARGOT Eli just crashed his car into the front of the house. ARI Dad. my God. He yells: CHAS Where are you? Royal and Richie stand up among the rubble. Three dalmation mice dart around the room in confusion. What? CHAS (CONTINUED) .109. Eli sits on the floor. It’s OK. and mail is scattered all over the sidewalk. Chas grabs Ari and Uzi. He falls and bangs against the wall. Chas sprints down the stairs three at a time. ROYAL (CONT’D) They’re safe. DAY. Chas. He is bleeding from a head wound. The lighter airmail envelopes drift about in the wind. INT. He hands The wedding guests quickly begin to come out the front door and gather around the smashed car. barefoot. He sets them down. They look alarmed at his appearance. ELI Where are my shoes? Dudley finds one of Eli’s shoes in the fireplace. STAIRWELL. Several guests help Eli stagger to his feet. Chas runs down the steps. He examines them. Chas runs over to them. covered in glass and debris. particularly the warpaint. ROYAL They’re OK. Royal holds Ari under one arm and Uzi under the other. EXT.

Eli takes it quickly. knocks over a chair. Eli! CHAS The guests panic as Eli jumps over a couch. Royal shrugs. Eli body(CONTINUED) . KITCHEN. He darts away from the window. Ari and Uzi start to cry. Chas bolts up the steps. Buckley’s leash remains tied to the railing and extends taut beneath the wheels of Eli’s car. ROYAL I think we lost Buckley. He looks to Chas and points to Royal. He did? He says blankly: CHAS Eli Richie nods. RICHIE He saved them. and ducks into the kitchen. INT. Royal nods. banging his way through the crowd. HALLWAY. ELI Did I hit anybody? Everyone looks to Eli. He screams: Chas bursts into the house. appears in the broken front window of the home. CONTINUED: Chas looks to Royal. He holds one of the canapes to him. does not appear to notice Eli’s strange appearance and injuries. He Pagoda looks up from a tray of canapes he is preparing. ELI (CONT’D) Is everybody okay? Eli sees Chas staring at him. checks him and breaks out of the room. Eli hesitates. ROYAL Wait! DAY. PAGODA This is the quail’s egg. Richie brushes some debris off Uzi’s hair.110. Chas looks to Royal. Chas looks to Richie. DAY. He turns to the wreckage. Kind of. Chas! INT. Chas smashes open the door.

Eli yells. Help! ELI Please! Chas yells insanely. There are bonsai trees all around them. It is locked. The wedding guests scream and yell and try to break it up or get away. People rush into the backyard. Eli scratches and clutches. Eli runs to the back wall and tries the gate. (CONTINUED) . CHAS ELI (pause) Is he dead? Yeah. He has his hand over his eye. It is very quiet. Richie sits up in the bushes. Chas? Chas hesitates. NEIGHBOR’S YARD. Chas picks up Eli and tries to throw him over the wall. Eli is stretched out on his back. He seems drained. Chas tackles him hard. next to Eli. CHAS ELI (pause) I need help. EXT. ELI Did I hit the dog? Yeah. DAY. Chas breathes heavily. He and Chas look at each other. Chas grabs him by the arm. He turns to everyone watching him. Chas elbows Richie in the face. They both stare up at the sky. CONTINUED: They slam past the priest and knock him down the basement stairs. Chas lands in a Zen garden. and slams him against the wall. They look stunned. BACKYARD. RICHIE He climbs over the wall. Eli slips out the back door and sprints into the garden. Chas! RICHIE Don’t! Richie tries to pull Chas off Eli. He throws Eli over the wall. swings him around. Richie runs outside. Richie falls backwards into the bushes. DAY. EXT. Chas lies down on the ground.111.

ROYAL Well. ma’am? We got a couple of boys out there. That’s just my style. He says suddenly: ROYAL Can I say something to you. (CONTINUED) . them. ROYAL (CONT’D) I’ve been considered an asshole for about as long as I can remember. Henry nods. Henry? Henry looks to Royal. SIDEWALK. He says gently: HENRY I don’t think you’re an asshole. He looks back behind him and yells to someone: WALTER Go around to the other side! EXT. Henry and Royal run around the corner and up the steps of a neighbor’s house. A small Asian woman in a kimono looks out at ROYAL (CONT’D) Can we get into your backyard. Raleigh holds the priest’s hand. a tow-truck and a fire engine in front of the house. EMBASSY.112. But I’d feel pretty blue if I didn’t think you were going to forgive me. You’re just a kind of a son of a bitch. DAY.” Royal knocks. Raleigh and two paramedics roll the priest on a gurney. The door opens. Royal. Royal looks to Henry. Walter looks over the top of the wall. A plaque next to the front door says “Residence of the Japanese Ambassador. There are two police cars. PARAMEDIC I think he may’ve broken his ankle. DAY. an ambulance. CONTINUED: CHAS So do I. EXT. down at Chas and Eli. Royal seems genuinely moved by this remark. I appreciate that. They wait.

POLICE OFFICER I love your work. and killed that poor dog. The dalmation sits. Royal looks impressed. indeed. What kind of Royal points at the dalmation. Sparkplug. ELI (touched) How sweet of you to say so. and there are several bandages on his head and arms. POLICE OFFICER You’re Eli Cash. smashed it into the house. is it? (to the priest) Do you have an alternative? The priest shakes his head. Dusty stands with Richie on the sidewalk and examines his eye. RICHIE Not really. Eli is being questioned by a police officer. It is scratched badly and looks terrible. ROYAL I think he’s part mutt. CONTINUED: RALEIGH That’s not terribly serious. He looks very upset.113. The police officer studies Eli’s driver’s license. papers you got for him? One of the firemen shrugs. DUSTY Can you see out of it? Richie covers his good eye to test his bad eye. His warpaint is smeared. (CONTINUED) . Royal stands among a group of firemen with a dalmation. ELI At which point I apparently lost control of the vehicle. ELI (pause) I am. ROYAL (CONT’D) Sit.

WALTER But these aren’t structure-bearing elements. Ari and Uzi try to look at Buckley under Eli’s car as several firemen and tow-truck drivers attach straps and chains to the wheels and axle. ETHELINE You boys come over here with me. ROYAL I got you a new dog for the boys. Dudley laughs crazily. It’s still best to file under force majeure and recoup the deductible. Etheline goes over to them. CONTINUED: (2) DUSTY Uh-huh. Page me if it spreads to the other eye. Chas looks at the dalmation. RALEIGH What’s so funny. ETHELINE I know. Walter points to the rubble. Dad. (CONTINUED) . CHAS He looks back to Royal. Silence. Dudley? DUDLEY You look great! Henry and Walter survey the scene from the smashed-out living room window. ARI But Buckley’s still under there. Royal takes the dalmation over to Chas.114. You did? Royal nods. Raleigh and Dudley stand next to each other wearing firemen’s helmets. at the moment. Minor corneal damage. but there’s nothing we can do for him. HENRY It doesn’t matter. CHAS What’s this? ROYAL I just bought him.

Chas. Dad. Royal puts his hand on Chas’ head. Etheline smiles sadly. ROOF. He nods. MARGOT I wonder what happened to him.115. (pause) Sometimes when people have a traumatic experience. ROYAL I know you have. (CONTINUED) . Silence. He stares at the ground. Uzi pets the dalmation. Chas looks to Royal and takes a deep breath. Richie and Margot sit near the edge of the roof. Etheline looks to Royal. Royal holds out the leash. He brushes his hand against the white feathers on the falcon’s neck. Margot says quietly: MARGOT Well. Ari takes the leash. CHAS What’s his name? ROYAL (quietly) Sparkplug. CHAS We’ve had a rough year. All of you. Thank you. their hair turns white. Royal watches as Chas takes the dalmation over to Ari and Uzi and talks to them quietly for a minute. Chas suddenly starts crying. I’m sure he’ll get over it. CHAS Chas hesitates. ROYAL You’re welcome. RICHIE I don’t know. EXT. DAY. I’ve been trying to make it up to you. He takes it. next to the falcon in its coop. CONTINUED: (3) ROYAL I’m sorry I let you down. Richie has an ice pack over his eye. Royal looks back at her. Chassie.

Henry and Etheline stand side by side in front of a judge in a small office with green carpet and an exercise bicycle. and Royal takes a drink. CONTINUED: Richie nods. but the wrapper has faded. She takes a puff. NARRATOR (V. HENRY So help me God.) Royal dug a hole for Buckley behind the garden shed. Uzi and Chas watch Royal throw dirt on to a grave in the backyard. DAY. They have tears in their eyes. GARDEN. She points at the chimney. RICHIE How old you think those are? Margot opens the pack. Ari. She reaches behind it and takes out a pack of cigarettes and a matchbook. Margot puts her arm around Richie’s shoulder. MARGOT I’d say about ten years. Richie studies the pack of cigarettes. and lights it.116. The dalmation sits on the ground next to them. It is still sealed. She pulls out a loose brick. She takes her inhaler out of her mouth and puts it in her pocket.O. (CONTINUED) . Chas hands Royal a bottle of scotch. and buried him in a canvas duffle bag. puts it in her mouth. and she lights it. and they smoke their stale cigarettes together. She turns and looks at the top of the chimney. EXT. DAY. boys. She looks to Richie. Richie nods. He takes it. Say a prayer -- Ari begins. ROYAL All right. Margot looks at him for a minute. MARGOT (CONT’D) This was one of my first hiding places. Henry has his left hand raised and his right hand on a bible. with a jawbreaker in his mouth: ARI Dear Heavenly Father -INT. takes out a cigarette. Margot offers him a cigarette. OFFICE.

NARRATOR (V. on it. CUT TO: Margot standing alone outside the theatre. under the marquee.) Raleigh and Dudley went on a lecture tour to eleven universities in the promotion of their new book.117. MEDICAL STUDENT Can he tell time? RALEIGH Oh. no. Royal sits in the front row with the other Tenenbaums. INT. DAY. He laughs quietly and shakes his head.) Margot’s new play. The Levinsons in the Trees. THEATRE. in judge’s chambers. INSERT: (CONTINUED) .O.) Etheline and Henry were married fortyeight hours later. Raleigh and Dudley sit onstage at a table in front of an audience of doctors and medical students.O. NARRATOR (CONT’D) It ran for just under two weeks and received mixed reviews. Brooks College. CONTINUED: The judge extends the Bible to Etheline. Raleigh takes a question. A father introduces his daughter to a group of native tribesmen. NIGHT. NARRATOR (V. smoking a cigarette. A stage-set for a play that appears to take place in a network of tree houses on a tropical island. INT. my Lord. The house is sold out. AUDITORIUM. Dudley shakes his head emphatically.O. was produced at the Cavendish Theatre. Elaine Levinson. FATHER This is my adopted daughter. She puts her hand NARRATOR (V. The rest of the audience is silent.

Runs with Two Horses. Ari and Uzi ride on the back of a speeding garbage truck. HOSPITAL. NARRATOR (V.O. A tall. Richie has a white gauze patch taped over his eye. skinny. ready to serve. On the dust jacket there is a yearbook photograph of Dudley with his Henry Aaron-style glasses flipped up. 375TH STREET Y ROOFTOP. is? You know who Laver He bounces a ball and gets Uzi steps up to the service line.O.) Royal had a heart attack at the age of sixty-eight. Eli practices with a lasso in front of several young addicts. NARRATOR (V. Dudley’s World. NARRATOR (V. His expression is almost impossibly blank. A resort compound on the high plains. Uzi watches it race past him. INT. He has stitches on his forehead. Royal. twelveyear-olds at the 375th Street Y. Uzi and a group of children dressed in tennis clothes watch as Richie demonstrates the continental style of grip to them. A concrete tennis court with a chain-link net. ELI This is my sponsor. Uzi hits a fast serve to Richie’s forehand. Ari. DAY.) Richie started a programme teaching competitive tennis to eight.O. . EXT. They are all laughing. He and Eli are dressed in matching deerskin jackets. DAY. EXT. CONTINUED: A copy of Raleigh’s new book. Native American man in his late forties walks over to Eli. RICHIE Rod Laver used it. Richie fires his return full-speed straight down the line. STREET. Eli points to him.) Eli checked himself into a rehabilitation hospital in North Dakota. Chas.118.

He nods.THE END -- . Margot has her arm around Richie’s shoulder. Richie. Henry stands next to Etheline. They step away from the grave. looks up at Chas.” The priest sees this and hesitates. DAY. Royal is strapped on to a gurney with tubes sticking out of his arms and an oxygen mask on his face. Eli. Raleigh stands next to Dudley. Chas puts his hand on Royal’s cheek. Royal’s gravestone sits in a wheelbarrow next to a pile of dirt. She takes his arm. Henry. Royal closes his eyes. Richie throws a white flower into the grave. AMBULANCE. He smiles slightly. The priest is on crutches. Pagoda wears Royal’s sunglasses.119. INT. EXT. NARRATOR (V. They are all bundled up in coats and scarves. It says “Epilogue. Dusty stands beside him. -. He looks puzzled. The ambulance races full-speed up the wrong side of the street.O. and the sky is getting dark. DAY. Raleigh. INSERT: Page 275 of The Royal Tenenbaums. They all stand in silence for a minute before they turn away and walk to their waiting car. and was the only witness to his father’s death. She smokes a cigarette. Chas looks to Ari and Uzi standing a few yards away. It reads “Royal O’Reilly Tenenbaum (1932-2001). CEMETERY. NARRATOR (CONT’D) In his will.” Epitaph: “Died tragically rescuing his family from the wreckage of a destroyed sinking battleship. holding his hand.) Chas rode with him in the ambulance. he stipulated that his funeral take place at dusk. Everyone in the family is gathered around as Chas. Ari and Uzi fire several shots into the air with Chas’ and Royal’s old BB guns. Royal appears to be smiling underneath his oxygen mask.” He Snow falls lightly. Dusty and Pagoda lower the casket. Chas sits beside him. Eli stands next to Walter. Tears stream down his face.