A Selection of Obscure Robert Anton Wilson Essays

From his essays in GettingIt.com and the Fortean Times. I was under the assumption that they would be somewhat dated. But as I reread the articles, it became clear that admirers who are unaware of them might in fact find them enjoyable. I’ve left the links in but not sure of they still work (via 10 Zen Monkeys, boing boing) More of RAW’s work can be found here http://tinyurl.com/kpxuyz and here
http://tinyurl.com/6gane

Coming Again The orgasmic release of the Apocalypse myth
by Robert Anton Wilson Published November 15, 1999 in Whoa! The sky is falling! The sky is falling! -- Chicken Little Back in the early 1980s, Vicki Weaver, a pious Christian lady, persuaded her husband Randy that the Bible proved that the final battle between Christ and Antichrist would take place in 1987, beginning with an attempted slaughter of the Christians by ZOG -- the Zionist Occupied Government in Washington, D.C. The two of them (and their children) logically moved to a high hill in Idaho -- Ruby Ridge -- where they planned to stage their own last fight for the Lord. Alas, 1987 passed, Vicki had to recalculate, and things were a bit fuzzy there for a while. But then the '90s came 'round, Randy sold a sawed-off shotgun to a government informer, and the Feds arrived to arrest him. Randy and Vicki thought they were facing the ZOG, the Feds thought they were dealing with lunatics, and the results were so bloody all around that Ruby Ridge remains controversial to this day. Sometimes, the Apocalypse can ruin your whole week. On the other hand, I have survived Doomsday so many times that it has begun to bore me. In the last three months alone, I have -- we all have -lived right on through three dates that leading eschatologists have authoritatively named as the Day of Reckoning (11 August, 11 September, and 7 November.).

I wonder why so many people have such a lascivious longing for the Apocalypse? It seems a far more popular fantasy game than Dungeons & Dragons, and, of course, it has all the thrills and chills of a slasher movie.

But there may be more here, just as there is to horror and catastrophe movies if you think about them. Neo-Freudians, and especially Reichians, suggest that our form of civilization stifles and constricts us so much that at times we all long to experience some orgasmic but catastrophic "explosion," like King Kong breaking his chains and wrecking New York, or even more like the masochist in bondage, according to Dr. Reich. This sudden release from the bondage-and-discipline of our jobs and our taxes -- actually called the Rapture by Fundamentalists -- seems ghoulishly attractive to Christians, New Agers, and others who believe in a "spirit" that will survive the general wreckage. In that case, the end of the world seems no worse than a visit to the dentist: You know you'll feel better afterwards. This sort of desire for Total Escape/Total Annihilation has always had its bards and visionaries. Christianity, for instance, started out as a typical Doomsday cult: Verily, I say unto you, there will be some of them that stand here which shall not taste of death until they have seen the Kingdom of God come with power. -- Mark 9:1 And there shall be signs in the sun and in the moon and in the stars... This generation shall not pass until all be fulfilled. -- Luke 21: 25,32 And then shall appear the sign of the Son of Man in heaven ... This generation shall not pass until all these things be fulfilled. -- Matt 24: 30,34 Of course, when all the marks standing there and their whole generation did pass without the Apocalypse coming, these prophecies required reinterpretation. The second most common talent among Doomsayers -after their unparalleled ability to predict dates on which the world perversely does not end -- is their capacity to recalculate. But, then, theology is logic with deuces and one-eyed jacks wild. Among those not committed to the Rapture, prophecies of doom usually have another loophole: Only most of humanity will perish. In these scenarios, those with the Right Ideas will survive, although they will probably need to stockpile food, water, and guns in advance. Those with the Right Ideas are the ones who believe in the Prophet, of course. Thus there seems an element of sadism mixed in with the masochism of the Millennialist mentality: We will suffer only a little, these folks say, but the rest of you motherfuckers are really going to get the

Freud himself pronounced that sadism and masochism always contain a bit of one another. In 1957. The famous psychic Edgar Cayce predicted that Christ would return in 1998. very small selection of failed end-times prophecy. and so will Doomsday. October 22. Robert Anton Wilson is the author of 32 books. Pick a date -. As long as people enjoy scaring themselves and scaring one another. heading east. an encyclopedia of conspiracy theories. a pastor named Mihran Ask chose April 23. too. So far. Why haven't we heard from him? Maybe he's having trouble finding a place to rent. But others calculated exact years for the end of the end: 1918. We survived the alleged three meteors of November 7. who had previously goofed by announcing that it would occur in 1843. 1844 -. and if we survive that. including Everything Is Under Control. In 1986. Well. of course. well. the batting average of all Doomsayers has stayed firm at 0. but we still have Y2K ahead of us. Another psychic. the Jehovah's Witnesses. Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh predicted the catastrophes would begin in 1984 and climax in 1999. undeniable "beginning" of the end. Criswell -. and 1994. and I guess you did.works. 1920. This is only a very. and maintains the Web's strangest . visible. It didn't. as the palpable.best remembered for his oratorical performances in Ed Wood's movies -. or you wouldn't be reading this. Moses David of the Children of God predicted the battle of Armageddon would happen that year and Christ would return in 1993.any date -and you may become the leader of a new cult. I survived all of them. if you are curious. the Seventh-day Adventists and. 1925. the Weekly World News recently reported the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse to be in the vicinity of Santa Fe. 1957 as the Last Day. When the 1844 prophecy also failed. later. 1975.This was Doomsday. I remember that vividly because Paul Krassner claimed in the next issue of The Realist that the world had really ended that day and we just weren't paying attention. as calculated from the Bible by William Miller. That. Some of them rejoiced in the bloody World War that began that year. Here's a brief list of some of the Doomsdays that had to be postponed: • • • • • • • • 1141 CE -. new calculations from the same texts gave birth to the Adventists. will not stop this ever-popular guessing game. You may even get as rich as Rajneesh or the Pope.000. 1941. The Jehovah's Witnesses originally picked 1914 as the jackpot year. In 1983. horror movies will remain popular.predicted August 18.Hildegard of Bingen predicted the world would end that year. for instance. you can find longer lists of Doomsdays here and here. 1999 as the end of time.

while others frankly admit they find it as perplexing as a chimpanzee in a Beethoven string quartet. You can see why New Agers like this: It sounds like it supports the old magick idea that if you get a hold of a hair from your enemy. David Berman of Columbia. but this dissent needs to be mentioned since most New Agers don't know about it. a mathematical demonstration by physicist John Stewart Bell published in 1964. the "AntiBellists. has become more popular than Tarot cards with New Agers. Particles once in contact certainly seem "connected. Alain Aspect and others in the 1970s -.have settled the matter. things aren't that simple. who think they understand it but generally don't. or it may mean that there is some kind of information that can travel faster than the speed of . These arguments are too technical to be summarized here. Reality Ain't What It Used To Be Thirty-five years after Bell's Theorem by Robert Anton Wilson Published November 1. Unfortunately. and only a small minority still cling to them. April 1985. some of whom think they understand it. Some. but Dr." or correlated. Berman finds it so absurd that he prefers solipsism.com. ("Is The Moon There When Nobody Looks?" Physics Today. 1999 in Whoa! Bell's Theorem. solipsism.) Among those who accept Bell's Theorem. Berman says it isn't." still publish criticisms of alleged defects in the experiments. Most physicists think a long series of experiments. The most daring criticism of Bell comes from Dr. especially those of Dr.site @ www. anything you do to that hair will affect him. In my own (hazardous) attempt to translate Bell's math into the verbal forms in which we discuss what physics "means. so that whatever happens is related to everything else (non-locality). He also serves as CEO of CSICON (the Committee for Surrealist Investigation of Claims of the Normal). Meanwhile it remains controversial with physicists. But not all physicists have agreed. N. non-locality ("total rapport") and 2. who believes he has refined the possible interpretations of Bell down to two: 1.rawilson. We will explain non-locality below. David Bohm of the University of London offers three interpretations of what it means: "It may mean that everything in the universe is in a kind of total rapport.and again by Aspect in 1982 -." Bell seems to prove that any two "particles" once in contact will continue to act as if connected no matter how far apart they move in "space" or "time" (or in space-time). Dr. You can find more about this here (and for general problems associated with Bell's Theorem click here). or at least to be dancing in the same ballet.

I'm here in this universe. brings us very close -. a quantum heavyweight and Nobel laureate.. like persistent optical illusions. It means particles are correlated because everything is correlated..g. but are only human projections. Dr. so I never sent it there. or it may mean that our concepts of space and time have to be modified in some way that we don't understand"(London Times. an idea that seems "occult" or worse to most scientists -. Herbert et al. Bohm's third alternative. (Some think Relativity already demonstrates that. brings us into realms previously explored only in science fiction. especially Capra. Bohm's first model. Jack Sarfatti have offered even more radical offshoots of this notion. If I can send an FTL message to my grandpa. Dr. Nobody has openly endorsed this view but several (Stapp. because space and time are just "in our heads. could lead us anywhere. Buddhism.very.) The particles are correlated because they never moved in space or time. he might be so shocked that he wouldn't survive to reproduce. You can see why New Agers like this. From the Big Bang to the last word of this sentence and beyond. very close -. it is argued with unction and plausibility in Fritjof Capra's The Tao of Physics. all the way back to the Big Bang. Bell's particles may be correlated because they are parts of an FTL (faster than light) cosmic Internet. it might change my whole universe to the extent that I wouldn't be here at all (e. The strongest form of this non-local model is called super-determinism and means that everything is one thing. or at least one process. John Archibald Wheeler and Dr. but atomic physicists are its creators." as in Vedanta.light.. Bohm's second alternative. It also brings us within hailing distance of Jungian synchronicity. nothing can be other than it is. but in the universe next door the message removed me.to Oriental monism: "All is One. The universe is in constant creation. 1983).) This must either be rejected as impossible. Dr. since everything is part of a correlated whole. once endorsed it. of unknowingly endorsing it. "total rapport.) have accused others. producing multiple parallel universes. Wheeler has proposed that every atomic or sub-atomic experiment we perform changes every particle in the universe everywhichway in time. including back to the Kantian notion that space and time do not exist. or else lead to the "parallel universe" model." also called non-locality. modification of our ideas of space and time. Sarfatti is working on the theory of information-without-transportation and hopes to develop an FTL system which will indeed allow me to send an email (or its equivalent) to Julius Caesar with all the paradoxes that might result. as in Sufism. Dr. February 20. and Taoism." .even if Wolfgang Pauli. information faster-than-light.

Unfortunately.and they got me thinking. 1926 in fact. indeterminate and meaningless) or some system we haven't found yet. Sounds like Zen to some. it's hard enough finding your way around in Chinatown. Bell's Theorem "means a whole new ball game.. Each show had at least one galoot remarking that the line between "cult" and "religion" seems fuzzy at best."Scientology" and "Heaven's Gate" on A&E's Investigative Reports -.e. in Aristotle's excluded middle. i. In Doubt We Trust Cults. give up classifying things into only the two categories of "true and real" and "untrue and unreal. we can never know anything about any hypothetical "observed" without an observer. false. David Harrison suggests that we may have to abandon Aristotelian logic. the four-valued logic of Rapoport (true.Woody Allen Last week." physicist Saul Paul Sirag told the present author once. and BS in general by Robert Anton Wilson Published November 29. the Copenhagen view is stated as: We can only describe observer-observed interactions." In between. the probabilistic logics (percentages/gambles) suggested by Korzybski. Berman's solipsism and the moon that is only there when we look at it.) Generally. religions. He also serves as CEO of CSICON (the Committee for Surrealist Investigation of Claims of the Normal). but others fear this is opening the door to Dr. All we can say for sure is that "reality" ain't what it used to be. I happened to see two TV shows about "cults" -.the basic pre-Bell axiom that we can describe an external world apart from our experiments or meddlings. including Everything Is Under Control. and maintains the Web's strangest site @ www. 1999 in Whoa! Can we actually "know" the universe? My God. Others would rather give up "objectivity" -. nobody feels too sure about the rules of the new game. -. c..com. Some say this rejection of objectivity was always meant by the Copenhagen Interpretation (invented by Neils Bohr long before Bell appeared.rawilson. we may have the "maybe" proposed by von Neumann in 1933. as we have seen. See also: Mutts Who Think Robert Anton Wilson is the author of 32 books. an encyclopedia of conspiracy theories.. but each show also had a majority of .And there are other alternatives.

they all instill BS -. If we see somebody who looks like Joe across the street. science can only say. We examine him empirically . as a "religion. we all know damn well how fallible we are. even to the extent of toasting." i.fits more of the facts known at this date than any rival model. for instance. "Does that matchbox have any matches left in it?" Metaphysical questions about "mind control" or any other immeasurable "entity" or "essence" cannot be answered. This line remains obvious and visible to all observers. But restricting myself to the "materialistic"/scientific method of asking questions that have definite experiential answers.e. If a group has enough members to influence elections.folks who were quite sure they could distinguish a "cult" from a "religion" by the institution's degree of "mind control" or "brainwashing.Belief Systems. At least for those who enjoy that kind of pastime. BS contradicts both science and ordinary "common sense. for a few thousand years. "This model -. the cops and the corporate media will treat it with respect. as in Waco. argument. Sort of like chess. We know that our sense impressions can mislead us." Except when we get dragged into a metaphysical. I have no commitment to materialism as a philosophy that explains everything. we are aware that it may be Joe or it may be some ginkus who looks a lot like Joe. it will also have a large bank account.or theory. But BS has an even more total incompatibility with what I loosely called "common sense." Catholic nuns and priests vowing celibacy seem no more or less weird than Heaven's Gate members who also make that choice. or interpretation of the data -. the same group could be called a "cult" and treated accordingly.g. you know. Mormon extraterrestrial cosmology seems as goofy as Scientology. since no correlation of words can ever do that. or "mind control.. roasting and charbroiling. and a philosophy is never more than a correlation of words." I think both groups were confused. There are two clear-cut and empirical lines between a "cult" and a "religion": [a] membership (voters) and [b] bank account. Materialistic questions can be answered. I observe no difference in operation between "cults" and "religions." With few members and little money. or combat. or ideological." more metaphysical distinction between one gang of True Believers and another. and these two factors will guarantee that the politicians. e. etc." We can never know if the model will fit the facts that might come to light in the next millennium or even in the next week." It contradicts science because it claims certitude and science can never achieve certitude: After all. [b] being a function of [a]. The only problems arise when people try to draw a less "materialistic. Religions and cults all use the same techniques of brain damage. and the best that can be said is that arguing about them has provided a certain amount of intellectual entertainment.

000 is to assert that you are more than three times as smart with words as Babe Ruth was with baseballs -. and I have never encountered two people who agreed totally about what was or was not in the hall. The same experiment works with hearing. and other senses. We all live in different sensory universes. tentative judgements are safer than rapid certitudes. if ten witnesses at an accident are questioned.600. But if our perceptions are somewhat uncertain. Now.333. ten slightly different stories always emerge -. but even then you'd only have an average around . or any similar data. the Earth looks flat.and yet that's what every Belief System (BS) claims. I must have tried this several hundred times by now. further doubt. We have learned that slow. maybe you are vain enough to think you are more than twice as good at philosophy as Ted Williams was at baseball.and sometimes the differences are huge. The late. You will all hear some sounds nobody else hears and miss some sounds everybody else caught. conditioned and learned brain circuits. Worse yet. further doubt. The person with BS knows the "right answer" at all times and knows it . That means they missed more than two out of three times they swung. nu? -. not slight. then all of our ideas. To assume an average of 1. and nobody has a guarantee that his/her universe corresponds more exactly to the alleged "real universe" than anybody else's. including the political or ideological ones.lest we classify him too quickly as Joe or not-Joe. great Dr. Timothy Leary used to put this in terms of a baseball metaphor: the best batters all had a lifetime batting average below . etc. I have performed the following experiment in workshops for nearly 40 years now: Everybody in the class is asked to describe the hall they passed through to get to the classroom. Human brains are as individualized and unique as human fingerprints. must also remain somewhat uncertain. investigation.rather a conceited view. as well as with vision and memory. the color of the walls. Let somebody with a watch say "Go!" and then all of you be silent and listen for one full minute -60 surprisingly long seconds. After all. further investigation. The function of religions and cults. Try it with a half-dozen friends. which are deductions or inferences from perception. is to short-circuit the normal "common sense" process of doubt. We do not walk through the "same" hall: we walk through a realitytunnel constructed by our imprinted.

and very annoying since most of their "right answers" don't make sense to the rest of us. Holocausts etc. one Web site proves Bill's diabolism by converting Bill Gates III into the ASCII code used in computer science. . eights and one-eyed jacks wild. etc. Paradoxically. He also serves as CEO of CSICON (the Committee for Surrealist Investigation of Claims of the Norm The Lumber Of The Beast Tracking the Antichrist by Robert Anton Wilson Published October 11.namely. because memorizing rule books cuts you off from sensory involvement with the existential world. This makes them very happy. Common sense and/or science require investigation and revision. including Everything Is Under Control. it shuts off all brain functions except memorization and represents the suicide of intelligence. and maintains the Web's strangest site @ www. "faith. especially the brains of those who wrote your particular rule book. result from deliberately forgetting the fallibility of human brains.and a good memory. see? That's the advantage of using wild cards. It also physically exhausts you. BS only requires a Rule Book -. Why not just "Bill Gates" since he seldom uses the III? Why not William Gates III? Well.rawilson. you get the wrong results that way. this leads to a rejection of the best functions of the brain -." certitudes of all sorts. as Ezra Pound noted in Canto 85: Awareness restful & fake is fatiguing If the world seems to be full of stupid. using the timehonored methods of Theological Numerology -. making for a livelier game. you've probably suspected it. an encyclopedia of conspiracy theories. Inquisitions. revise and correct itself.sacred scripture. its ability to rethink.com. Das Kapital or whatever -. purges. For instance. 1999 in Whoa! Did you know that Bill Gates is the Antichrist? Well. that is because it is still dominated by Belief Systems. Whether this BS operates under the label of religion or cult or Political Correctness. It also creates the kind of intolerance that produces witch hunts.immediately. People with "faith" represent mental health problem #1. Belief Systems. Robert Anton Wilson is the author of 32 books. but some people have set out to prove it.which transcends ordinary logic because it's played with deuces. crazy and half-asleep people.

. Recent candidates have included Aleister Crowley. the Antichrist is always considered a specific individual appearing only in the last days of Earth. Napoleon and Hitler (by unanimous acclaim). without mentioning the Father. I=1.. Other historical figures who have been positively identified as "the" Antichrist included such notables as Martin Luther (by Catholic theologians)." which makes an ideal sing-along for pot parties and other gatherings of the digerati elite. S=83. Ronald Wilson Reagan.In ASCII. One even gives you the lyrics to a song "Bill Gates Is the Antichrist. MS-DOS 6. identified with the Dragon and the Beast in Revelations. Incidentally. "Antichrists" in all these contexts simply means heretics. I John 2:18 denounces many "Antichrists" who were already living then (nearly 2000 years ago. though." while I John 4:2-3 describes the "Antichrists" as those who deny Jesus.it has both singular and plural forms.. The Catholic Encyclopedia says "Antichrist" does not refer to one specific person or event. of course. Yasir Arafat. Bill still has rivals.. Add the numbers and the total is 666! Horrors! If you're not convinced. I=73. Barney the Dinosaur. G=71.where the word "Antichrist" only appears five times -. Mickey Mouse. Madonna. Saddam Hussein.) and I John 2:22 defines the singular "Antichrist" collectively as "he who denies the Father and the Son. I=1.. and even Ronald Reagan -. has six letters in each word. I=1. L=76. Well. In the Holy Writ -. of course. they could all be the Antichrists.. evades a direct answer. Meanwhile. Bill Gates III converts to the following: B=66. E=69.whose full name. Converted into ASCII code. postBiblical creation. T=84. Bill seems to be the target of more Web sites identifying him as the Antichrist than any other candidate. In fact. all the popes since the Reformation (by Protestant theologians) and. again. the result is: 77 + 83 + 45 + 68 + 79 + 83 + 32 + 54 + 46 + 50 + 49 = 666. Nothing says Anti can't be an Auntie. of course. but that was only the beginning. A=65. if you use the term the way the apostle John used it. Among the first to be identified with the combined Antichrist/beast/dragon figure were. in the film Who's That Girl?. when asked if she is the Antichrist. L=76. the reification of Antichrist(s) into one monstrous individual. Nero and Caligula. Henry Kissinger. Prince Bernhard (founder of the Bilderbergers!). was a later.21. thus yielding 6-6-6. Among the fundamentalists. try Bill's Microsoft Operating System.

At least. including Everything Is Under Control. means Lucifer's Enterprise. cartoons. a . or in Robert Fuller's scholarly study of this obsession. He also serves as CEO of CSICON (the Committee for Surrealist Investigation of Claims of the Normal). All of the above persons. "Lucent. by definition. Robert Anton Wilson is the author of 32 books." According to a 1992 poll by Time. Betty. The Anti and/or Auntie and/or plurals now has his/her/their own Web site. a leading demonologist. Bugs Bunny was the first UFO "abductee" in a 1952 cartoon called "Hasty Hare. mathematically. Now. and were also wearing Nazi uniforms. in 1961. Now that sounds sinister. who molested them sexually and otherwise. Bugs Bunny And Other UFO Victims Reality isn't always consensual by Robert Anton Wilson Published December 13." The next case did not occur until nine years later. Naming the Antichrist (Oxford. It sounds like a hell of a show. Anthony dollar and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. "Bob" Dobbs observed. 1999 in Whoa! Although few people remember this. As J. when Betty and Barney Hill famously encountered the "greys" from Zeta Reticuli. "You know how dumb the average guy is? Well. claims Anti-or-Auntie lives at Lucent Technologies at 666 Fifth Avenue in New York.Leaning toward the pluralist view. never did recall that poignantly puzzling detail. according to Abductees Anonymous. by the way. 1995). Antichrist and Associates. doesn't it? Oh. an encyclopedia of conspiracy theories." of course. some fundies have identified the Antichrist with freemasonry. for some reason. do you know the meaning of 2 x 4 x 666? That's the lumber of the Beast. Texx Marr. They brag a lot about their control over the mass media and preach love and kindness. many millions have allegedly suffered the same sort of "extraterrestrial" sexual abuse. Barney Hill remembered the malign midgets as garbed in Nazi regalia. 53 percent of our citizens expect both Christ and Anti to fight their final bout sometime in the year 2000. I wish I knew where to buy tickets. computers per se. have been accused either on Web sites. and maintains the Web's strangest site.R. coins etc. groups. the Susan B. I kid you not: None of this is satire. half of them are even dumber than that.

there would be no scientific taboo against investigating such cases. or of the mystics of all traditions -. and Congress might even have declared war on the invaders by now. which once gave Dr. Imagine what would happen if "many millions" of U. The Outer Space monsters were also behind the assassination of John F.support group for survivors. alleges that he saw papers revealing a treaty between our government and the "greys. The little bastards have broken the treaty. on the other hand. But our government can't stop them because of their superior weapons." although he remains convinced that they experienced something and that the experience is real in some sense. Kennedy. Mack. citizens said they had been sexually assaulted by aliens from Mexico or Iraq.S. with all the prestige that bestows upon this eldritch and Lovecraftian topic. not only by meddling sexually and/or genetically with our citizens. the investigations of Dr. I've met Dr. Budd Hopkins has become rock star famous for helping people "remember" such experiences. who claims to be a former Naval Intelligence officer. I find that startling. Mack to remain on their staff. Bill Cooper. that they now love their kidnappers and have received important ecological warnings from them. In his second book. If the subjects claimed. former president of the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis. Obviously. isn't sure about the literalness of alien abductions. instead of aliens from Outer Space. as well as learning from their extraterrestrial sermons about how wicked and wretched our society is. both law enforcement and mainstream science seem to have no interest in this matter at all. Peculiarly. and he seems like a sane and sensible man. a distinguished scientist on the staff of the psychiatry department at Harvard University." who are providing our military with advanced technology. except that it sure ain't consensus reality. allows Dr. in this context. Timothy Leary the bum's rush for having weird ideas. but also by mutilating a lot of cattle. Corey Hammond of the University of Utah. has written two books on the subject." but "experiencers. this would be considered evidence that they had been "brainwashed" as well as raped (think Stockholm Syndrome). The differences in scientific and political reactions to atrocities by human aliens and nonhuman aliens seem even more confusing than the rest of this mystery. he says. Dr. as most of Dr. Dr.or of Leary and his merry band of acid astronauts. And Harvard. Cooper says. Mack's subjects do. He frankly admits that he's not quite sure what kind of "reality" these experiences occur in. . John Mack. under hypnosis. Dr. Hammond has had a lot of clients who. Passport to the Cosmos (Crown) he no longer calls his subjects "abductees. And this is not just another New Age fad. It's something more like the non-ordinary reality of Carlos Castaneda's Don Juan books. Consider. Mack.

something even worse than selling us out to rapists from Reticuli. . He also serves as CEO of CSICON (the Committee for Surrealist Investigation of Claims of the Normal). He himself. I think the whole topic needs less sensationalism and more open-minded research. Mack and Dr. sadomasochism.Nazis. Mack. Frankly. Hammond at the same time. I cannot accept either the blind faith of the True Believers or the dogmatic denials of the Establishment. the next person engulfed by this non-ordinary reality might be you or me. Could both Dr. another conspiracy is simultaneously torturing and reeducating children to make them Slaves of Satan? Or might we more economically assume that a lot of people have had a lot of nonordinary experiences -. and the data he has unearthed on Satanic cults in general." Can we believe both Dr. prove that three distinct groups are working together -. But in that case. Mack's cases and Dr. who has been investigating UFOs for more than 30 years. Vallee has suggested as one possible explanation a vast experiment in mind control and behavior modification by some Intelligence Agency (he doesn't try to guess which one). Jacques Vallee. and maintains the Web's strangest site @ www. may have been deceived by his superiors in Naval Intelligence. has also considered a variation on Vallee's theory. Hammond's cases represent persons who fell victim to this and retain only shattered and distorted memories of their ordeal? Considering what has already leaked about the CIA's MK-ULTRA research. Dr. After all.and we all tend to interpret these according to our own hopes and fears? Consider the model offered by Dr.com. and NASA -. Like Dr.rawilson. Dr. he points out.psychedelic trips without drugs -.remember hideous incidents of Satanic rituals. coprophilia and assorted horrors. the government (I no longer feel safe in calling it "our government") must be using the "grey mythology" as a cover-up to hide something else -. the CIA. Cooper says.who have been secretly and brutally programming American children for over 50 years to make them part of "a Satanic order that will rule the world. the guy who says the greys were behind the JFK hit. and accept that while extraterrestrials or even weirder nonhumans have been raping people and teaching ecology. infant sacrifice. including Everything Is Under Control. this hypothesis does not seem altogether extravagant. Bill Cooper. Robert Anton Wilson is the author of 32 books. an encyclopedia of conspiracy theories. Hammond believes that these cases.

Ducks are fairly rare. He also convinced her that she possessed no fewer than 126 alternate personalities. that when she was a child her father had forced her to participate in Satanic rituals of human sacrifice." Right? The FBI's Behavioral Science Unit. Santa Cruz. This must mean. And as my grampa used to say. Ellen Bass and Laura Davis. Olson employed "Recovered Memory Therapy.' demonology. 1999 in Whoa! In 1997.4 million in damages to one Nadine Cool. Magazine. Dr. The types of horror stories unearthed by this therapy usually involve incest.until she confronted her father with these hideous memories and he dropped dead of a heart attack. Even doubting the talking duck might get you in trouble at U. Satanic rituals or abduction by sex-monsters from Outer Space. Dr. Doubting that Satanism exists in every nook and cranny of our republic." This offshoot of psychoanalysis holds that most mental problems result from childhood traumas so unspeakably evil that we have blocked all memory of them. including angels.I Remember Satan 'Recovered memory. in their book The Courage to Heal (Harper & Row. of course. and duck soup by Robert Anton Wilson Published September 20.but such infidels are often so sunk in skepticism that they even deny the Virgin Birth and the Face on Mars. has even been drawn into the fray. demons and even a duck. which deals with serial killers. a jury awarded $2.C. under hypnosis. that the FBI is part of the cover-up. 1988). and announced that they have never found any evidence to support the panic. Kenneth Olson. Chicago. She had believed it all -including the duck -. Recovered Memory Therapy has a Politically Correct pedigree: It was popularized by two outstanding Feminist philosophers. . and they can only be "recovered" under hypnosis. And Satanic rituals were authenticated by Ms. who had sued her former therapist. Besides. "There's no smoke without fire. might easily get you convicted of Political Incorrectness. 1993) there were over 60 mob panics created by Satanic revelations in the years1982-92. at this point. He had convinced her. for malpractice. Many secular humanists hold that these B-movie scenarios are not "recovered" by hypnosis but created by it -. According to sociologist Jeffrey Victor in his book Satanic Panic (Open Court.

How could the FBI possibly be left out of such a juicy conspiracy? Secular humanism and Political Incorrectness. Like Nadine Cool. which originated in Nazi Germany. Claus got the boot from a Christian congregation. The Devil On The Chimney A tale of Lovecraftian horror and psycho-archeology by Robert Anton Wilson Published December 27.i. Robert Anton Wilson is the author of 32 books. Dr. represented in court by a stuffed dummy. They charged him with paganism. Worse yet. and maintains the Web's strangest site. including Everything Is Under Control.e. is it possible that Daffy Duck is the Devil? Keep an eye on your local media for further Feminist or Fundamentalist revelations. Dr Juan Fernandez III. Ms. Pope John XXIII threw the suspiciously merry old clown out of the Roman . however. which (he convinced her) resulted in her developing 75 personalities. an encyclopedia of conspiracy theories.000 in damages to Joan Hess of Wasau. are both still seducing millions. worse yet. a pagan god trying to steal Christmas from Christ. a group of decent.. another jury of infidels awarded $850. Cory Hammond of the University of Utah. He also serves as CEO of CSICON (the Committee for Surrealist Investigation of Claims of the Normal). Hess no longer believes any of these memories. the CIA and NASA are both part of the international Satanic cabal. they found him guilty on all counts. for persuading her under hypnosis that her father had sexually molested her as a child and forced her into a baby-killing cult. Maybe Daffy was also the talking duck in the Nadine Cool case? Or. Christian. including some juries. hard-working folks who called themselves the Truth Tabernacle Church held a trial featuring the well-known elf Santa Claus as defendant. They charged him with perjury for claiming to be Saint Nicholas. Claus.Why not? According to leading Recovered Memory expert Dr. About a month ago. It wasn't the first time Mr. She had sued her former therapist. Wisconsin. 1999 in Whoa! Nine years ago in Burlington. according to an Associated Press report earlier this month. Fernandez was wearing a tie with a picture of Daffy Duck on it when he was convicted. And never trust a duck. North Carolina. for basically being a jolly old elf -. They charged Mr. with all sorts of high crimes and misdemeanors. They even charged him with encouraging child abuse by appearing in whiskey ads.

to reveal Santa Claus as SATAN Claus.all have traits of the god that walks like a man and acts nasty sometimes and clownish sometimes and who was ritually killed and eaten by most of our ancestors in the Stone Age. See Sir James Frazer's The Golden Bough for the gory details. The heroine.000 BC. indeedy. like Peter Pan and the Green Man of the spring festivals. And you can find the rituals of this still-living god among the indigenous tribes of both American continents.the same demon in different disguises -. It only takes a minor letter switch. meaning bear. in 101 tales. consult Adaline Glasheen's Third Census of 'Finnegans Wake. Let me Illuminize you. What? Hannibal Lecter another of Santa's uncouth family? Yes. One variation on that became The Silence of the Lambs. (They also recognized Christmas trees as phallic symbols long before Freud. Another became Little Red Riding Hood..Catholic church back in the late 1960s. You can find him and her (for this god is bisexual) disguised in Artemis and Arduina and King Arthur. And Santa.) Many fundamentalists believe that all pagan gods are basically one false god -. And I swear the same god-bear tromps and shambles through every page of Joyce's masterpiece of psycho-archeology. You can track the bear-god in dwindling forms in a hundred fairy tales from all over Europe and Asia. As Weston La Barre pointed out a long time ago in his classic Ghost Dance: The Origins of Religion. and the Court Jester -. meets him while on a mission of mercy. This deity appears in cave paintings from southern France carbon-dated at 30.' Most folklorists recognize "the cannibal in the woods" as a humanized relic of the bear-god.and etymologists. instead of eating her he becomes her ally and helps her reach her goal. you can find remnants of a primordial bear-god from the bottom of South America up over North America and over the North Pole and down across most of Europe and Asia. Santa not only has an unsavory pagan ancestry but a rather criminal family history all around. who then became one with their god and thus also became (if the ritual worked) as brave as their god.and they think the disguise is thin in the case of this particular elf. who first spotted the bear-god when they identified the IndoEuropean root ard.. Finnegans Wake. I sort of think the fundies have it right for once. all unmasked via canny detective work by folklorists -.and (in an odd way) Chaplin's beloved Little Tramp -. If you don't believe me. and when she succeeds. they point out. . The Jehovah's Witnesses have always denounced Santa for his unsavory pagan past. He generally sets the heroine to solve three riddles.

uptight Christers. at least for part of a week. just when we need it most.com. despite getting the bum's rush by some grim. They called the lascivious critter an incubus. in the dead of winter." And the bear-god seems wakeful lately. in the Arab lands. is doing quite well also. and maintains the Web's strangest site @ www. Meanwhile. In the Christian Dark Ages. Santa retains traces of his carnivorous past. Yeah." He also pops up to deliver the punch line in Norman Mailer's Why Are We in Vietnam? We will see more of him. As a pagan myself. an encyclopedia of conspiracy theories. and the molesters come from Outer Space. they always return with a new mask but the same symbolic meaning. Sir Walter Scott called them "the crew that never rests. cannot be killed or banished. including Everything Is Under Control.these archetypal forces always come back under new names. too. I wouldn't have it any other way. the Boogie Man or Bogie or Pookah or Puck are all of somewhat ursine ancestry. but if they are "bad" he will EAT THEM ALL UP. Robert Anton Wilson is the author of 32 books. we note a similar outbreak of randy djinn. it began happening to young men. He has quite successfully stolen Xmas from X and brings pagan lust and pagan cheer to most of us. like the Great Mother and the Shadow and our ursine hero. They have never left us. The sex-demon. He has appeared prominently in three recent bits of pop culture (the movies Legends of the Fall and The Edge as well asStephen King's The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon) and snuck into Modern Lit 101 not only via Joyce but also via Faulkner's great parable "The Bear. and the three brothers hunting the dragon (Recognize them in Jaws? Spot them doing their Three Stooges gig?) -. although other animal-gods got mixed in sometimes. we all share the pagan belief. Children are told that if they are "good" all year. "The gods have not returned. methinks. He also serves as CEO of CSICON (the Committee for Surrealist Investigation of Claims of the Normal). His beaming face appears everywhere and if we have a minor cultural war going on between those who wish to invoke him via alcohol and those who prefer their invocations per cannabis. as archetypes of the genetic human under-soul (or "collective unconscious"). the Jester/Clown/Fertility God aspect of Father Bear. it India. every year.rawilson." Jung might state the case thusly: Gods. . that the best way to mark the solstice and the year's dying ashes is to form a loving circle and all get bombed together. Related example: Young ladies in ancient Greece were often seduced or raped by satyrs. Now it's happening all around us.In some rustic parts of Europe and probably in Kansas. Santa. Santa will reward them. especially to monks. it was devas. As Crazy Old Uncle Ezra wrote in Canto 113.

who published it in The Challenge of Chance.) Some people are clusters of bloody synchronicities in 23. Clark’s ship had an accident that killed him and everybody else aboard. Many of my weird 23s were incorporated into the trilogy Illuminatus! which I wrote in collaboration with Robert J Shea in 1969–1971. Mom and Dad each contribute 23 chromosomes to the fœtus. 23 has many links with termination: in telegraphers’ code. while Burroughs was thinking about this crude example of the irony of the gods that evening. Seisel’s grandparents had a 23 in their address. to give a flavour to those benighted souls who haven’t read Illuminatus! yet: In conception.The 23 Phenomenon Robert Anton Wilson With the release of movie The Number 23 earlier this year we paid tribute to the late. (A few lexicographers believe this is the origin of the mysterious slang expression “23 Skiddoo!”. he had known a certain Captain Clark. a bulletin on the radio announced the crash of an airliner in Florida. Prof. USA. Hans Seisel of the University of Chicago passed the following along to Arthur Koestler. defines 23 as the number of “life” or “a thread”.. who once bragged that he had been sailing 23 years without an accident. the man convicted of shooting Schultz. I first heard of the 23 enigma from William S Burroughs. Furthermore. hauntingly suggestive of the DNA lifescript. On the other hand. Looking further into the Dutch Schultz case. and after 1965 I also began collecting them. According to Burroughs. around 1960 in Tangier. the carrier of the genetic information. DNA. Sidney Carton is the 23rd man guillotined in the old stage productions of A Tale of Two Cities. I will mention only a few of them here. 23 means “bust” or “break the line”. Nova Express. etc. That very day. I found that Charlie Workman. his mother had 23 both as a street . Aleister Crowley. Schultz himself was assassinated on 23 October. Burroughs began collecting odd 23s after this gruesome synchronicity.. has bonding irregularities every 23rd Angstrom. Burroughs discovered that the bootlegger “Dutch Schultz” (real name: Arthur Flegenheimer) had Vincent “Mad Dog” Coll assassinated on 23rd Street in New York when Coll was 23 years old. and Hexagram 23 in I Ching means “breaking apart”. served 23 years of a life sentence and was then paroled. author of Naked Lunch. in his Cabalistic Dictionary. much lamented Robert Anton Wilson by reprinting this 1977 article from (you guessed it) Fortean Times 23. The pilot was another captain Clark and the flight was Flight 23.

Campbell also claims that Hitler lived briefly in Liverpool when he was 23 years old. Seisel himself once had 23 as both his home address and his law office address. a weird dream about Liverpool. it premiered in Liverpool on 23 November (which is also Harpo Marx’s birthday). etc. was the first psychologist to study weird coincidences of this sort and to name them synchronicities). which Campbell says describes the street intersection of the theatre where Illuminatus! opened (Jung. When Illuminatus! was turned into a play. on page 223 of Jung’s Memories. While visiting Monte Carlo. Dreams. in which the heroine wins a great deal by betting on 23 at roulette. producer of Illuminatus!. A few days after the expedition left. The Morgan Bank (which is regarded as the financial backer of the Illuminati by the John Birch Society) is at 23 Wall Street in Manhattan. Mother tried betting on 23 and it came up on the second try. in addition to the well-known 28-day female sex cycle. author of The Bermuda Triangle.number and apartment number. I turned on the television and caught an advertisement for the new film. The advertisement began with an actor shouting “Flight 23 is down in the Bermuda Triangle!” A week later. Airport 77. Berlitz claims it is real. I now have almost as many weird 23s in my files as Fort once had records of rains of fish. but I haven’t found the reference for that. In 1977. My two oldest daughters were born on 23 August and 23 February respectively. and people are always sending me new ones. Adolf Hitler was initiated into the Vril Society (which many consider a front for the Illuminati) in 1923. and it is specifically said to be “twice the size of the pyramid of Cheops” – but Shea and I thought we were writing fiction when we composed that passage in 1971. Die Liebe der Jeannie Ney. According to Omar Garrison’s Tantra: The Yoga of Sex. but “the crew that never rests” (Sir Walter Scott’s name for the Intelligence – or idiocies – who keep pestering us with this kind of phenomenon) refused to let me off the hook that easily. Recently. . claimed he had found a submerged pyramid “twice the size of the pyramids of Cheops” in the waters down there. Reflections. Euclid’s Geometry begins with 23 axioms. Charles Berlitz. You will find that monstrous edifice described in Illuminatus!. I was invited to join an expedition to the Bermuda Triangle. Seisel’s mother read a novel. one of my best friends died – on 23 December. later found. I declined because of other commitments. of course. there is also a male sex cycle of 23 days. As soon as I became seriously intrigued by collecting weird 23s. Ken Campbell.

Dr John Lilly refers to “the crew that never rests” as Cosmic Coincidence Control Center and warns that they pay special attention to those who pay attention to them. Nonetheless. the 23rd letter of the English alphabet. . Will Shakespeare was born and died on 23 April. I have become increasingly interested in Sir Francis Bacon as a possibly ringleader of the 17th-century Illuminati (Some evidence for this can be found in Francis Yates’s excellent The Rosicrucian Enlightenment). in accord with custom. I have had odd psychic experiences of that sort for many years. editor of The Fanatic. I had the impression that I was being contacted by some sort of advanced intellect from the system of the double star Sirius. When Burroughs told him. was allowed to pick the day for his own elevation to knighthood by Elizabeth I. counting back. I found. B and C. “23 is the death number”. the 46th Psalm has a most peculiar structure. among other things. In this connection. (I have found some interesting 46s – 46 is 2 x 23 – but mostly regard them as irrelevant. and were shot to death by the Texas Rangers on 23 May. Heathcote Williams. both intellectually and emotionally. The 46th word from the beginning is shake and the 46th word from the end. Bacon. pops up continually in these matters. This particular experience. Dutch Schultz’s assassin was Charlie Workman. The physicist who collaborated with Carl Jung on the theory of synchronicity was Wolfgang Pauli. and I always record them carefully. who tends to look at the dark side of things. W. He picked 23 July.Burroughs. have the Cabalistic values of 2–3. the most popular bank-robbers of the 1930s. however. On 23 July 1973. met Burroughs when he (Williams) was 23 years old and living at an address with a 23 in it. I conclude this account with the most mind-boggling 23s to have intersected my own life. the two (or one) chief source of 18th-century Illuminism. William Burroughs first called the 23 mystery to my attention. until or unless supporting evidence of an objective nature turns up. Bonnie and Clyde. Williams was impressed. that 23 July is very closely associated with that star. 1934. Adam Weishaupt and / or George Washington. also come to mind. it is interesting that the 23rd Psalm is standard reading at funerals. Their initials. gloomily. but he was more impressed when he discovered for the first time that the building across the street from his house was a morgue. lived out most American underground myths quite consciously. was especially staggering. is spear. so I spent the rest of the day at the nearest large library researching Sirius. sees 23 chiefly as the death number.) Through various leads. but refuse to take any of them literally.

And 2/3 equals . if you prefer. My psychic “Contact” experience continued. Readers of this piece might find it amusing to skim through The Magical Revival and Aleister Crowley and the Hidden God. and subtitled his magazine. being in the constellation Canis Major. I finally decided to tune in one more time to the Sirius–Earth transmissions. the actors cajoled me into doing a walk-on as an extra in the Black Mass scene. a former student of Crowley’s (and note the initials K.66666666 etc. two books by Kenneth Grant. continuing until 8 September. the period 23 July – 8 September became known as “the dog days”. still one week after my 23rd experiment. Since Sirius is known as the “Dog Star”. The same week as that issue of Time. The next week. the symbol of the Illuminati. You will find numerous references. which is the name of one of the four German Rock musicians in Illuminatus!. Coincidence? Synchronicity? Higher Intelligence? Higher Idiocy? Of course. “A Review of Scientific Illuminism”. for nearly two years. off and on. One of the group was named Winifred. and try to produce something objective. The actor who played Padre Pederastia in the National Theatre production of Illuminatus! informed me that he once met Crowley on a train. cloudy and occult. bawling Crowley’s slogan “Do .On 23 July. on the stage of the National Theatre. But the second night of the National Theatre run. “Mere coincidence”.e. i. stark naked. The 23 July festivals in Egypt were part of Temple’s evidence.. using a battery of yogic and shamanic techniques. that is how I found myself. I opened myself to another blast of Cosmic Wisdom and told the Transmitters that I wanted something objective this time around. who called himself Epopt of the Illuminati. again!). after which I forcibly terminated it by sheer stubborn willpower (I was getting tired of wondering whether I was specially selected for a Great Mission of interstellar import. – Crowley’s magick number repeated endlessly. the eye on the pyramid was a favourite symbol of Aleister Crowley. Rolling Stone published a full-page advertisement for a German Rock group called Ramses. dear brothers and sisters. The Equinox. ancient Egyptian priests began a series of rituals to Sirius.G. since Kallisti Gold is the brand of very expensive marijuana smoked by the hero of Illuminatus!. linking Crowley in some unspecified way with Sirius. Time magazine published a full-page review of Robert KG Temple’s The Sirius Mystery. until October 1974.G. On 23 July 1976. And. and the advertisement included a large pyramid with an eye atop it. or was just going crazy). K. which claims that contact between Earth and Sirius occurred around 4500 BC in the Near East. After two years of philosophic mulling on the subject (late 1974 – early 1976). but I was more amused and impressed by his middle initials.

of course. As a fortean. I am. my one moment on the stage of the National Theatre. and I’m sure that last bit. But I will never cease to wonder how much of this was programmed by Uncle Aleister before I was ever born. under the patronage of Her Majesty the Queen. . was entirely Crowley’s work. at the age of 23. an ontological agnostic and I never believe anything literally. you’ll find that he began the study of magick in 1898.what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law”. If you look up Crowley’s Confessions.

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