Social Superstar

First Published in Paperback 2008 By Sumi Books
Text Copyright: Anthony Almeida 2008 The moral right of the author has been asserted. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission in writing of the publisher, except by a reviewer who wishes to quote brief passages in connection with a review written for insertion in a newspaper, magazine, or broadcast. A catalogue record is for this book is available from the US Library Design and Typeset by Jeffrey Posner Printed and bound by Lulu Cover picture used with permission from the author. ISBN: Every reasonable effort has been made to acknowledge the ownership of copyright material included in this book. Any errors that have inadvertently occurred will be corrected in subsequent editions provided notification is sent to the publisher. Walden Books NY8, NY


The Best of TSBMAG.COM

SOCIAL SUPERSTAR: Best of TSB Magazine Vol. 1 Table of Contents
Introduction Part 1: The Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript Part 2: The Best of TSB Magazine Section One: The Dating Articles 5 Keys to Playing the Role of Being Wanted 10 Lessons for Successfully Hooking Up Emulate a Celebrity for Instant Rapport Using an Opinion Opener to Initiate Conversation Being Comfortable Talking Dirty 10 Ways a Girl Can Keep a Guy Like Me Keeping Cool and Plowing On How to Talk to Younger Women Going Caveman on Women Never Show Emotion When She Walks Away 5 Tips for Lasting Longer in Bed How to Get Better in Bed Having Trouble Getting Hard Wimps into Winners Ultimate MySpace Jealousy Tool Aim Lower PUA Openers, Openers, Openers How to Calm Your Sexual Neediness Are You the Man or Just the Fan? 107 109 113 115 118 120 123 125 127 129 131 133 135 140 145 146 147 150 151 9 106

Section Two: The Inner Game Articles The Hero, the Bounty, and the Purpose Driven Life


Social Superstar

Integrity Makes a Man The Great Gatsby Complex Build it, and They Will Come Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along The Anatomy of the Sickness Living with Passion 7 Secrets for Getting Out of a Slump Can You Control Your Emotions Like Arod Going Down in Flames Bust Through Your Comfort Zone

159 162 166 169 171 175 177 180 182 185

Section Three: Alpha Living Articles 10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive 3 Tips for Abs of Steel A Manly Guide to Choosing Your Drink 7 Steps to Naturally Boost Your Testosterone How to Naturally Increase Energy How to Redo Your Wardrobe Winning the Day 1 College Roommate Wars 187 191 194 197 199 203 213

Section Four: The Stories The Buenos Aires Hooker Juice Incident Fortaleza Nights (Part 1) Fortaleza Nights (Part 2) Ten Years After I Took Her Virginity My First Piece of MySpace Pussy The Return of a Pickup Artist (Part 2) 216 222 226 229 233 240

The Best of TSBMAG.COM

Snowballed Hotel Room High The Early Days: Experimenting With Speed Seduction The Falling in Love Pattern Don’t Buy the Cheap Sex Toys The Drunken Night in Medellin Story

247 249 253 257 260 264

Section Five: 31 Days to Better Game Day 1: Designing Your Life Day 2: Developing Inner Game Day 3: Updating Your Look Day 4: Always be Advertising Day 5: Being High Status Day 6: How to be a Good Flirt Day 7: Approaching and Opening Women Day 8: Improving Conversation Skills Day 9: How to Build Comfort Day 10: Being Funnier… Day 11: Push Pull/Cocky Funny Day 12: Body Language 101 Day 13: Building Your Social Circle Day 14: How to Properly Tease a Woman Day 15: Creating a MySpace and Facebook Profile Day 16: Tips for Flirting Online Day 17: Phone Game Strategy Day 18: Text Game for the PUA Day 19: How to Go on First Dates Day 20: How to Get a Day Two

270 273 276 278 280 285 290 292 296 302 304 313 317 318 324 334 338 343 347 350

Social Superstar

Day 21: Building Sexual Tension Day 22: Preparing Your Bachelor Pad Day 23: Quick Lesson in Kino Day 24: Body Language 202 Day 25: Being the Badboy Day 26: Friend into Lover (part 1) Day 27: Friend into Lover (part 2) Day 28: Managing a Relationship Day 29: Tips for Getting Better in Bed Day 30: Ending a Fling or Relationship Day 31: Perform a SWOT Analysis on Yourself Index

354 356 361 363 368 371 374 377 380 382 385 387


The Best of TSBMAG.COM Dedicated to Morgan Chase II

This book is five years in the making! Who was there for the red and black days? For those that just came on board recently, the red and black days refers to the early days of TSB when it had a blood red header with a black background and white text. And Mike and I thought the site looked hot. Putting this book together brought back many memories. I had to search through over 1,500 articles to choose the very best. The evolution of the site, in a way, represents the evolution of both the life of me, and the life of Michael Stoute. We wanted to make this book a diverse look at the four years leading up to its publication. Instead of focusing solely on dating articles, stories, or self help type articles, we chose to break the book up into six parts. These six parts are a great representation of TSB Magazine, as well as Bobby Rio and Michael Stoute- the men behind the magazine. Another reason we chose to break the book up into four parts is because we think you will get more value of it that way. There are articles in here that will help you with all aspects of your life. For instance, if you bought this book for the pickup advice, you might be pleasantly surprised in six months to read some articles about fitness, fashion, or inner game, you may have missed earlier when you ‘re were concentrating solely on devouring all things pickup. The six parts of this book are as follows: Part 1: The Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript This is our never before released manuscript for becoming a social superstar. This manuscript was first created over 10 years ago. Over the past 10 years it has been tested and refined. This contains everything you need to know to climb to the top of any social ladder. Part 2: The Best of TSB Magazine

The Essential Dating Articles

Social Superstar

Going through our huge library of dating, pickup, relationship and sex articles, I found it tough to choose “the best” so I decided to choose articles that give you a well rounded approach to improving your dating life. Most of these articles came out Mike’s and my own personal experience of improving our dating life. It wasn’t a quick and easy ride for either one of us… we hope that these articles will make your ride a little less bumpy.

The Inner Game Articles
These are some of the articles that mean the most to me. Through the many phases I’ve gone through as a person during the five years we were creating this magazine… these articles resonate with every period. The topics transcend dating advice, as the entire core principles can be applied to any area of your life, and I am confident you’ll see a marked improvement. This section is also the most timeless… as long after the days you are married with children… I hope that you still pick up this section of the book and reread some of these articles and find inspiration from them.

The Alpha Living Articles
Like the Inner Game articles I chose to include these Alpha Living articles because they too, are timeless. These are articles that you can read when you’re a sixty year old man, and still learn something from. Whether you’re interested in getting in shape, maximizing your energy, or just learning the art of ordering a man’s drink in the bar… you’ll find the information in this section. Alpha Living is a way of life that you’ll hopefully continue throughout your lifetime. It is about fulfilling your dreams… and doing so in style.

Stories, Tales, Lies, and Exaggerations
The fun stuff! Over the past five years, Mike Stoute and I have chronicled our stories on TSB. These are the stories that made Bobby and Mike the men they’ve become. You’ll read some inspiring stories… and other stories that display our humiliation. Some stories will educate you… other stories will entertain you… and other stories will have you asking “why the hell did I ever take advice from these guys?”

31 Days to Better Game
31 Days to Better game was an extremely popular series we ran at TSB Magazine where we presented a different lesson every day that would

Whether you’re a novice or an experienced PUA.The Best of TSBMAG. and gurus. The lessons were brought to you by some of the best dating coaches. There are 31 lessons that walk you through many different areas of game. all giving their unique perspective on improving certain areas of game. bloggers.COM help you improve your dating life. I think you’ll enjoy this section a lot. I believe that you can get something out of following the 31 day plan. 8 .

Social Superstar Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript Table of Contents Introduction Chapter 1: What defines a superstar? Chapter 2: Image is everything (authority + social proof) Chapter 3: The 10 Second Impression (authority + social proof) Chapter 4: Building Your Social Resume (authority + social Proof) Chapter 5: The Attitude (liking + scarcity) Chapter 6: Be Captivating (liking + scarcity + authority) Chapter 7: Cultivate a fan base (commitment + liking + reciprocation) 9 .

It was around 2002 and that I found the underground seduction community. We took the teaching of Dr. And with those friends and fans… women will naturally follow. which focused on the psychology of influence. Ciaduini.The Best of TSBMAG. The only reason I have not released it up until now is because many of the strategies contained in this manuscript I have personally used within some of my current social circles." I found them to be even more effective. At that point I was just coming out of a relationship and began studying the art of seduction. Everything in this manuscript has been tested and refined. and we applied to the realm of climbing the social ladder. Pick-up artists are usually defined by their ability to cold approach a random woman and quickly close her. If you follow the guidance of this manuscript. It was at this point that I took the original manuscript and began altering it to include some more of the hidden techniques of some of the world's best pick-up artists. This manuscript is about building an empire of friends and fans. One of my friends and I attended a private seminar held by social scientist Dr. It works. This manuscript is not going to teach how to be the world's best pick-up artist. and were even featured on prime time news for our antics at the Homecoming day parade.COM Introduction This manuscript has been developed over the past 10 years. The teachings in this manuscript transformed my friends back at Montclair State University from relative will never have the need to cold approach again. Robert Ciaduini. 10 . This manuscript was first conceived while I was back in college. After graduating college I took the principles originally constructed and altered them a bit for "the real world.into a group of men who threw 400+ people parties.

They will want to be associated with them. I would like you to take the time to think about the guys you have met in your personal life who have best exemplified the image of social superstar. People will naturally want to be around them. Envision the way the carry themselves. While simply copying their characteristics will not land you roles in motion pictures. Listen to the way they talk. or Johnny Depp. focus on specific aspects of them. Right now. When you think of social superstars. Now I want you to spend a minute writing down the different characteristics of them that jumped out at you. No matter how different the external image of these guys may seem. energy. and vitality that the social superstar produces. These guys will often be referred to as charismatic. You should picture their specific body language. Once you have a clear picture of them in your mind.who come to mind? Maybe you know a few guys personally who have this characteristic? Or maybe you immediately think of a guy like George Clooney. or simply enigmatic. Other people want to drink in the enthusiasm. Tom Brady. or have you quarterbacking in the Super Bowl -it will have you commanding the power and respect these guys have. there are certain characteristic that they all share. within your specific social scene. Tommy Lee.Social Superstar Chapter 1: What Defines A Superstar? So you want to be a Social Super star? And live large? Some guys are just born with inane gift to control the energy of any room they enter. hear the way their voice sounds when it comes out of their mouths. and sense of personal style. Spend a minute to get a clear picture of them in your mind. charming. First. Listen to the way they use humor casually. Listen to the way they construct their conversations. posture. What aspects of them are unique and unlike the many others you come in contact with who don’t possess their charisma? 11 . These characteristics are the blue print for social superstardom.

12 . by understanding that there is nothing unique inside of these menyou'll know that you too are capable of reaching their level. Try to capture in words. And second. In the following chapters I will delve much deeper into the process you must go through to elevate yourself to Social Superstar status amongst your social scene. Try to describe the energy that these social superstars instilled in others around them. This is important for you to fully comprehend this for two main reasons. In fact. Envision the look on people’s faces when they walk into a room. fundamentally it has nothing to do with them at all. is because it is my way of outlining the goal for this manuscript.The Best of TSBMAG. It has everything to do with the way that people react to them. and why you want to become it. Or the energy that is sucked out of the room when they depart. The reason that I have asked you to write down both the specific characteristics of these men and the specific ways in which people reacted to them. Imagine the way a woman would react to one of their advances.COM After you have jotted down a list of the distinct characteristics I want you to dig a little deeper. Imagine the way their entourage would follow one of their commands. you'll realize that by using the principles of persuasion and can manipulate the reaction you receive by others. The Reaction They Receive What you must first understand going forward is that what causes these men to rise to the level of social superstar has nothing to do with what is inside of them. You can't become a superstar if you don't have fans propping you up. I will repeat this phrase for emphasis: It has everything to do with the way that people react to them. and ideally onto a greater stage. you must first have a clear goal of what you are trying to become. Hear the way people speak about them when they were not around. First. I want you to envision the way other people react to them. the envy that other people felt towards them. Write down the desire that women had toward them. Over the course of this manuscript you will learn to use the principles of persuasion and influence to climb to the highest level of any social ladder. If you want to become a Social Superstar. Now spend a minute writing down the different ways in which people react to them.

These cars are sitting right alongside of hundreds of other cars. The SL500 Mercedes convertible. what cars catch your attention? The Ford Taurus? The Toyota Corolla? No. Think like this. The Plan: Image is everything.Social Superstar Chapter 2: Image is everything (Authority + Social Proof) Your objective: The objective of creating an image is to establish both authority and social proof. People will automatically assume that since you have the social intelligence to stay fashionable. In this chapter you just need to recognize that by being trendy and fashionable you are presenting yourself as having a high level of social intelligence. But you notice these are actively involved with "cooler" social circles. The Porsche. or hip. You can’t wait for your peers to tell you what to like. and say “look at me” But these are the cars you look at because of their reputation. The image you present to the world should establish you an authority on your scene. Because if you’re waiting for them to dictate what you can wear. The Corvette. They don’t flag you down. and their alluring Image. You need to know what the current trends are before most everyone else. It is how you carry yourself. The 745i series. When you walk into a parking lot. You need to dress fashionably. trendy. These cars have a presence and if you want to be a social superstar you need to have just as powerful of a presence. Your image should also convey social proof. They don’t yell out for your attention. You have to be ahead of them with the trends. or what music 13 . their fine details. Your image should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are the person to look up to for determining what is cool.

Choose someone who is well known and followed in the media. blogs. Instead of dropping $60 on a new video game… buy a pair of the trendiest sneakers you can find. If you’re the artsy music type choose someone from a popular band. You can by a whole new wardrobe for like $50. Another option that I’ve done is go to thrift shops or Salvation Army stores with clip outs of outfits you want to put together. If you’re more of the athlete type choose someone like Tom Brady or Tony Romo. When it comes to creating your image. Social Superstars know what the current trends are because they are keenly aware of what is going on. or they have friends that are keenly aware telling them what is going on. You need to be up to date with the trends. Spend $100 if you have to. Generally I recommend picking a celebrity you most resemble. it’s out of style. But the sneakers must be the real deal. If you’re going after the “bad ass” look you would want to choose someone like Colin Farrell. And once they’ve run their course and 14 . The examples I’m giving may be outdated by the time you read this. and magazines to know what the trends are.The Best of TSBMAG. This is the basis of who you are in the public eye. If you don’t have “cool” friends then you need to be following fashionable websites. You are probably thinking that you can’t afford the clothes they are wearing. You’re right. If you’re going for a preppy look choose someone like Matt Damon. You don’t want to copy their style from a movie. You want to copy their style from their day to day life. Everything else can be second hand. You can also start putting more of your focus. Celebrities pay fashion consultants thousands of dollars to keep them trendy… there is no reason not to take advantage of the lessons they teach with every outfit they wear. I always suggest modeling yourself after a celebrity that you most resemble or whose style you would like to emulate. But it is also important to pick someone who fits the style you are going after. chances are by the time you’re wearing it. A solid pair of kicks is your best investment. It isn’t called “being trendy” for nothing. Choose someone in their twenties.COM you can listen to. But what you can do is mimic the clothes by purchasing similar outfits of less expensive brands. and energy toward you image. money. You can’t. what you see in the gossip magazines.

knowing when not to speak. body language.not even the blonde-bombshell walking by can shake this poise. you’re not paying too much attention to any one person) .from The 7 Elements of Charisma. A sincere. work on maintaining a healthy tan. I am going to go into great detail about how to use things like physiology. and what to say when you speak. But image is more than just wearing trendy clothes. And if you don’t have a high 15 . Your posture should make you appear to be confident and at ease with your surroundings.learn to read when it is called for. Meaning. * If you’re white. but you’re too prestigious to stare. Even if you’re not at ease. People around you WILL notice this and subconsciously decide that you ARE a person of prestige. and posture to build immediate social proof. and when it’s not). sit.Social Superstar gone out of style. In the end. it is easy to stand out when you have it and it shows. pay attention to your posture so that it seems as though you are. It is the total package. * Flaunt a sincere. tonality. No sunshine? Find a nearby tanning salon. In the next chapter. and stand. It breaks the ice. The Elements of Image and Charisma Here are some other tips to enhance your presence and image .esteem and confidence. automatically paints you as a person of high self. your goal is to give off the impression that you’re a prestigious person accustomed to ranking high in social circles . In other words.and that’s because you feel that there is nobody worthy of your attention. friendly smile at strategic intervals (but don’t overdo it . friendly smile is a strong weapon. knowing when to speak. you’re never “star-struck” because you are the star. But for remainder of this chapter I want to give you some more hints on how to make your image more appealing. * Pay attention to how you walk. In a world where most people lack a high level of self-respect. tears down people’s walls. and knowing how to carry yourself throughout. The 10 Second Impression. * How do your eyes follow the crowd? As if you’re disinterested (meaning. You may cast a glance. Buy a new pair. A good pair of sneakers or shoes is the cornerstone of a good wardrobe. * What is your mind set? You are in a situation that requires a strong focus on tact and diplomacy.

now it’s that much easier to give it to them. Here’s an analogy: If you look like a thug. And if you look like a charismatic person used to respect and even admiration. you ask yourself: How is this person going to interpret my next few words? What kind of effect are they going to have? What effect is it that I’m going for? Will I sound like I know what I’m talking about? Or will I sound like a fool? Will I sound confident? Or will I sound cocky? Will I sound sincere. you’ll be prejudged as probably being gay. You need to give off the impression that you are an important person and are considered an important person by others. like most). * Before speaking to a person. it’s that much easier to create the effect that you’re after. Charisma opens many doors and will get you into many places otherwise far off limits. And now you’ve created “presence. It is a very influential tool when you want something. This is what he or she expects. Many elements make up Image. By themselves. you will be prejudged as a person who is probably charismatic and worthy of respect and even admiration.” When creating a charismatic image.something that we practice in our daily encounters with others until it is developed over time. Once you’ve been prejudged. And because they expect it. but when packaged together they merge for great effect. someone who listens more than he speaks? Or will I seem as though I talk too much and therefore am not a good conversationalist? 16 . then fake it. For the rest of us. you’re using this instinct to your advantage (which most people can’t control because they’re unaware that it is something happening in their subconscious). you’ll be prejudged as probably being a thug. In the chapter on attitude I will give you tips to help the right attitude to come naturally to you.the trick to faking it is to fake it with sincerity (this will be repeated further along).The Best of TSBMAG. Maybe for a very rare and select few. Notice that we used the word “probably” in the above paragraph? We use the word “probably” to represent the other person’s expectations. it is an acquired art . these simple details regarding a positive.COM level of self-respect (again. If you look like your gay. Take note . Most people don’t understand the charismatic persona and can only assume that it comes naturally to some people. or will I sound fake? Will I come across as a good conversationalist. presence is but one. You need to always be conscious of how you appear to other people. prestigious selfimage don’t accomplish much.

Below are some tricks you need to convey: * Never seem to be in a hurry . a coward. Remember.. as if you could do much more. This means even when you are not actively engaged in a conversation you need to present you best image. If you don’t have any clue what makes a good conversationalist read through some of the articles on http://www. but you don’t want to fall into the trap of constantly being inside your head worried about what you are going to say. elusive. as if you know that everything will come to you eventually. or hurts your image in any other way.’). You just want to think for a brief second if what you are saying conveys confidence and coolness. act effortlessly. 17 .. What you say doesn’t have to be perfect. or if it makes you sound like a showboat. you are being watched at all times. means ‘So slight as to be difficult to detect or analyze. * Your actions must seem natural and executed with ease . * Always seem patient. Cloak your focus on the elements (which will more than likely seem intense when you first start practicing the art) by being confident on the outside and relaxed on the about building conversation skills. and over time.hurrying betrays a lack of control over yourself. Never let them see you sweat.tsbmag. You need to be a good conversationalist.Social Superstar The above advice is sound. * Practice being subtle (” when you act. These articles should provide a nice foundation for becoming a better conversationalist.” as used here.

nervously rubbing his chin. And it should present you as a man with high social intelligence. As you sip your beer you are making 10 second judgments on everyone that passes your table.COM Chapter 3: The 10 Second Impression (authority + social proof) Your Objective: The objective of manipulating your non-verbal communication is to establish both authority and social proof. but those around you appear to respect you and look up to you. You are observing everything that is going on around you. It should convey that you are comfortable as the leader. and squished. slouched down. There is a person to his right and left. You are not only completely comfortable within your scene. a stylish haircut. In less than a minute your entire perception of him has changed. the guy just stands there. Your 3 second judgment so far is positive. The bartender is busy and the man is forced to wait there for his drink a moment. A man walks by. he is of above average looks. The combination of these three attributes you will provide you with the requisite social proof you need. While the bartender is serving a girl on the other end of the bar.The Best of TSBMAG. but so has every girl's who was 18 . Your non-verbal communication should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are used to being treated well. and an expensive watch. trendy jeans. He keeps timidly putting a finger up to get the bartender's attention. avoiding eye contact with the other patrons. wearing a nice button down shirts. Not only has your perception of him changed. Your Plan: Imagine that you're sitting at a table in a crowded bar. The man walks up to the bar. and neither of them has squeezed over an inch to let him in. The non-verbal communication you present to the world should establish you an authority on your scene.

That guy… standing alone waiting for his drink. Yes. Everything we've gone over in the preceding chapters regarding creating the look of a superstar is important. the proof. but you also must take away any last hint of doubt. grooming. tan. You wouldn't have to speak to a single one of them. and your sex life. in which he talks about how the best marketers create a short pitch that is so powerful that it is almost impossible not to buy. 19 . and has a body most guys would kill for… but he just looks uncomfortable and out of place. It is all prominently on display by the way they carry themselves. your social intelligence. He's a good looking guy. in your best outfit. in a nice outfit. We've talked about how it is important that you always present your best self. Yes. But you must be aware that there is more at play then how you are dressed up. and physical appearance. the benefits. "The Irresistible Offer" is the title of a book by Mark Joyner. and the amount of eye contact that they make with other students. you must present your physical attributes in the best possible light. you must dress fashionable and cool. We've already discussed fashion. you have extremely limited time to catch the public's attention. These are the non verbal cues that people look for when making a snapshot judgment on someone else." The Irresistible Offer This means that you need to be completely congruent in all areas of your identity. You need to not only present them with the features. There are certain telling cues that allow people to make instant decisions about your level of self esteem. But that is not enough to be a superstar. You need to create the irresistible offer. their walks. Although all of the physical signs should be pointing to "cool" it is apparent that he is anything but. There is a saying I love "Walk the talk. He claims that in today's marketplace.Social Superstar eying him down as he walked by. within minutes you would be able to tell which of the students were of the popular crowd. If you walked into any high school in America. and which of the students were bound to be eating their lunch alone in the cafeteria. So has the perception of every guy who was subconsciously sizing himself up against the guy for dominance on the social hierarchy.

In the following sections we are going to go into detail in the different areas that make up your non verbal cues. you will be identified as a fraud immediately. I am extremely confident. posture. They can bring you onto MTV's Made. and how well you follow the general rules of intrapersonal communication. and has a cult following of men who aspire to be like him." A third student says "It's got to be that you know how to talk to a girl in a way that will get them horny enough to fuck you. After his powerful stories of success. The way you carry yourself is the one thing that cannot be faked. says "It's true I dress in a sexy way… and if a woman was going to fuck a guy in ten minutes he'd probably look like me… but no.The Best of TSBMAG. Brad is a well known social artist. These areas in include: body language. The first student says. "Because you are extremely confident" And Brad says "Yes. and makeup artists in the world… but if you're body's non verbal cues remain the same. he asked the audience why they believed he is able to continually have women willing to sleep with him after knowing him for less than a half hour.COM The best way to remove any last hint of doubt is to "Walk the talk" and carry yourself like a superstar. Everything about you needs to be congruent. eye contact. As we will discuss later in "Never appear too perfect" you must show some vulnerability and flaws… the flaws just can't come involve any of these cues. and must stand up to the test of scrutiny. who dresses like a rockstar. One by one members of the audience raised their hands to give their input. I don't want you to mistakenly interpret this to mean that you must be perfect. In the first few minutes of the speech Brad gave some details about the various 10 minute lays that he has had in his lifetime. and have you done up by the best fashion consultant. I was at a seminar listening to the legendary Brad P speaking about how to get a 10 minute lay. that isn't why. but there are a lot of extremely confident guys who don't pull girls into random bathrooms for spontaneous sex" A second student says "Because of the way you dress." 20 . If you are going to create yourself to be "the irresistible offer" you need to hit them from every one of these angles." Brad. personal trainers.

" How to Create Comfortable Body Language Sex is hypnotic. His body language makes you forget that you're watching an actor PLAY James Bond. 4 Ways to Make Your Body Language More Hypnotic 1. That's why it's used so blatantly in advertisements. I am confident. So what is the secret to hypnotic body language? It is easier than you think. How do you give your appearance that same hypnotic appeal as sex? In the previous section. Sean Connery is highly regarded as the actor that best portrayed the character James Bond. None of these feelings are sexy. "Everything" Brad says. and fears. I am dressed like a rock star. Meanwhile Brad has been writing each answer down on the teleprompter in front of him. Finally Brad points to the seven answers on the screen. standing awkwardly alone. the example we used of the man waiting for his drink. Be relaxed 21 . and I make it impossible for them to not want to fuck me in ten minutes…" Brad presents the women he meets with "the irresistible offer. brought to our minds all of our own insecurities. We may keep our gaze on the man. If you want to create a hypnotic presence as a superstar… you need to be so comfortable in the role that your audience accepts your role without reservations. He is so comfortable in the role… that you believe he is James Bond. but we would be doing so in the same way we that we just can't turn away from a car wreck. They key to creating hypnotic body language is comfort.Social Superstar And Brad says. While it can be argued that all of the actors nailed the part… it is obvious upon watching a few scenes of Connery as Bond to notice just how comfortable he appears in the role. I talk good game. I have sexy body language. "Oh… I get them so horny they can hardly contain themselves when I talk to them… but a lot of guys can talk a good game. made us feel uncomfortable. anxieties. The man. "I get ten minute lays because I am all seven of these answers." The students shout out several more answers.

you can use it to your advantage pretty regularly. If you want to achieve relaxing body language you first must relax all of your muscles. Subconsciously people tend to mirror the people they are surrounded by. Along with relaxing your muscles you need to relax your mind. The interesting thing about physiology is that once you learn how to manipulate it. Be confident 4. What you are basically trying to do is put yourself in a sort of hypnotic state of relaxation. The easiest and most productive way to relax your mind is through slow controlled breathing. We also tend get really tense in the shoulders. How you stand 2. In order to make physiology work in your favor it is necessary to recognize your nervous habits. How you sit Here is an explanation of each. But if you learn to control your physiology. If you are nervous and tense when you go out… naturally the physiology you present will be that of a nervous and tense person.The Best of TSBMAG. There are three main body positions in most social situations which you can use to convey comfort: 1. your heart rate naturally follows. Be Relaxed The easiest way to make people comfortable around you is to be relaxed around them. and stop the nervous. Be powerful 3.COM 2. How you walk/move 3. so that you can put an end to them. tense gestures… your brain will assume a position of relaxation. Once you slow your breathing down. When we are nervous we tend to tense up our jaw muscle. slowly those around you will tend find themselves falling into a relaxed state. 22 . If your mind is nervous… it will be harder to control your physiology. causing an almost crawled up appearance. This is especially true of your facial muscles. The more relaxed you appear to be. Slow down We are going to show you how to demonstrate these four qualities to further illustrate how to create a compelling presence.

Get in the habit of catching yourself whenever you find that you are performing any of the above habits. Doing any of these things immediately screams that you are not comfortable in your present situation. but that they are higher value and thus. The beautiful thing as I mentioned earlier is that the discontinuation of performing these nervous ticks will trigger in your brain that you are no longer nervous… and your brain will command you to act in the way you naturally do when you are comfortable. This behavior communicates that you’re nervous and that you feel awkward. you are emotionally reacting to them. or playing with your drink all tell the set and everyone around you that you are not only nervous around them. but after enough training you will naturally no longer perform these nervous ticks. The emotion of nervousness often manifests itself through these nervous behaviors. let them hang naturally by your sides. You’ll notice a marked improvement in your interactions.Social Superstar Below are some of the nervous habits that you will need to avoid… and ultimately replace with more positive empowering habits. Looking relaxed when walking One of the most common ways a man displays nervousness while walking is to keep his hands in his pockets as he walks. but after some practice. or fiddling. It is important to remember to keep control of your hands. When people feel insecure or nervous they start to have trouble sitting still. touching. Some people will rub their chin or neck. Looking relaxed while standing Nervous ticks such as swaying from side to side. playing with your hands or fingers. Fight the urge to start rubbing. You don’t know what to do with your hands so you shove them in your pockets. Eliminate them. At the beginning you’ll have to force this. moving around too much. you’ll start to automatically relax more in social situations. Force yourself to relax and let your arms just fall. At first it may be a constant battle with yourself. Their insecurity eats away at them and they feel forced to constantly be moving their hands. Instead. other people with run their hand through their hair. others will juggle the loose change in their pocket. The minute that you recognize yourself using your hands to display nervousness… immediately stop and place your hands by your side in a relaxed manner. 23 .

Don't squeeze your hands. Once seated. Being Powerful While having a relaxed appearance will surely make others around you feel more comfortable. Instead. keep your hands away from your face and hair.The Best of TSBMAG. You will need to incorporate several other characteristics into your body language. There is nothing good that your fingers can do above your neck. A superstar knows how to balance the two. which is face up. One of which is power. and if you keep one foot on your knee while talking you might have a tendency to shake the free foot. the objective is to take up space while appearing relaxed and comfortable. but if you find that you are fidgeting too much then cup your right hand face down in your left hand. Looking relaxed while sitting When you sit. The subcommunication behind this body language tick is that you’re nervous and uneasy. A low value person can be relaxed… but very few low value people will be both relaxed and powerful. This helps you maintain control and good body posture. it is not enough to create that hypnotic captivating presence.” This is when people hold their drink in front of their chest in a social environment. The reason that you want to display power and dominance is because these qualities communicate value. As we spoke about above in relation to "being relaxed" you will find that the more powerful a physiology you present. creating a silly looking distraction.COM Another thing to be conscious of when you're standing in a bar or club is the “drink shield. Feet belong on the floor. and relaxation with your body language. If you are constantly crossing and un-crossing your feet and legs you'll appear uncomfortable. alone. It is best to keep your hands apart. hold your drink down by your hip and don’t cross your arms or take a protective stance. 24 . you will naturally come to feel more powerful. Don’t overdo ‘taking up space’ lest you come off as tryhard. In this case it’s the drink. So your instinctive reaction is to cover your midsection (traditionally the most vulnerable spot on most mammals) with some sort of protection. simply let them lay together on your lap. security. You are trying to convey abundance. While you are seated it is best to keep both feet on the floor.

It displays a lack of enthusiasm and energy towards life. 25 .these impressions present that of a less than powerful person.. Many times guys do this because they believe that the other person cannot hear them. These are not the kind of people other people want to interact with. People that feel a lack of power tend to offer nothing to the world. one of three things happens typically: I. The minute you lean in you have just handed them the power in the conversation. Avoid holding your face up with your hand. Another way to give your power away is to lean in when talking to someone. You both move halfway out of the way. III. The Gunslinger Walk is based off of an article originally published by Sebastian Drake.. people often get into a situation where two people are walking directly at each other. and make a conscious effort to recondition yourself to avoid the negative habit in the future. II. One of the hallmark traits of this behavior is head straight. If you think that you're having trouble being heard then maybe you should work on your tonality and voice projection. Throughout society. as I think this article is best representation of keeping your power as you walk. You then go on to walk as if this long cape is flowing down your back. Looking powerful when walking One of the most efficient ways to walk in a more powerful way is to implement the Gunslinger Walk. It is important to learn some of the ways that people give their power away as to avoid them. After experimenting with the "cape walk" for several weeks I began to naturally feel more powerful as I walked.Social Superstar I learned this technique years ago while listening to an Anthony Robbins CD in which he describes "the cape walk. The other person moves for you. You move for the other person." The "cape walk" is technique in which you imagine you have a Superman cape hanging down your back. Whenever this happens to you. as they appear to have nothing to offer. Here is the article in its entirety. This displays the image that you’re too bored or tired to bother holding up your head. It can also give off the impression that you’re uncomfortable with the way you look and are trying to hide your face.

26 . but it can be a hell of a lot of fun. Roll in the heels: An exaggerated roll of the heels at the end of each step. Knowing smile: The disarming. The Gunslinger’s Walk is a highly exaggerated style of walk based on highly successful men and the caricature and archetype of an 1800’s gunslinger . Simply observing one of these people can strike wonder.and that’s it. awe. Slow movement: Moving extremely slowly through crowds. you NEVER move for another person based on status alone. or just the way he carries himself. With people who are also high status. Henceforth. large muscles. you will move a half-step out of the way. This does not bode well for meeting her later. The man might have status from a style of dress. and inspiration into the hearts of those around them. The most common and obvious example are beautiful women. and they will move the other half step. and then high status men. self-assured smile finishes the look. When you move out of someone’s way . It’s mirrored off people who brim with the utmost confidence. Roll in the hips: An exaggerated push from the hips with each lift of the leg. Thrown back shoulders: The essence of good body language.The Best of TSBMAG. Gunslinging isn’t necessary. The key elements of a Gunslinger’s Walk are: Horizonview: Staring beyond the crowd and expecting it to part. Men who moved with raw electrifying presence. You’ll move if you meet someone handicapped.either the white-hat sheriff. or the black-hat bandit. With a solid presence.COM People move for people that they see as higher status than them subconsciously. you will feel people who believe themselves lower social status than you moving out of your way as you move through the world without you even doing anything.especially a beautiful woman you’re signifying that you see her as better than you. or young children . elderly.

In modern times. and with his full stature. it’s hard to get people to move for you. Thrown back Shoulders Rise up to your full stature. Slow Movement When gunslingin’. It’s crucial to keep your view to the horizon if you’re rolling your hips: You look like you’re a larger than life figure that way. Remember to keep your shoulders back and broad at all times. but instead staring past them into the distance as they think about what goals they want to achieve.Social Superstar The Horizon view The legendary cowboys did not look at a crowd as they moved through it: Their eyes were always looking past. as opposed to just trying to court attention. you transcend the negotiation and the struggle. Picture the cowboy . He moved with purpose. pushing off the ball. and draw a bit more attention to yourself. you see the most beautiful women and high status men not looking at people directly in front of them. By taking a long past view at the horizon. if someone is stopped. and “roll through” into the front of your foot. and people are more likely to move out of the way of you as you pass. or falsely humble. with your chest out and your stomach in. staring off into the horizon and the adventures that lay beyond. To aid you. it becomes a negotiation. Every time two people walk directly towards one another in a straight line. rolling them through so you rock ever so-slightly back and forth each time you move. To take this to its logical extreme.he never made himself small. you can mentally imagine a “ka-ching” sound like a cowboy’s spurs every time your foot touches the ground. or meek. it’s crucial to move at a slow pace. When you hurry through the gives you a 27 . Ka-ching… ka-ching… ka-ching… Throw your hips into your walk. So move slower than people around you . This will add to your stature once again. land first with your heel. Roll in the Hips and Heels When your foot lands. everyone is forced to go around them. The lower value person moves from the way of the higher person.

with a slight knowing smile. You don’t look at people in front of you that are oncoming. This one’s a bit more advanced and complicated. Directing Traffic One last tip that’ll help with gunslinging. This “directs 28 . people’s natural instincts are to follow the people in front of them. great body language. self-assured and self-confident smile. The key is to lift up the opposite hand of the way you want the person to go. with a view on the horizon.COM presence. with your palm facing towards they way you want them to go. It’s a slight. raise your right arm from your side upwards. The Knowing Smile When gunslinging. knowing. The effect becomes more pronounced the more people who do it: So. you start gunslinging. one person moves . and tend to break sideways.The Best of TSBMAG. Jackpot. Your palm should be facing left. How to Part a Crowd Here’s the secret behind my legendary gunslinging performances: Once two people simultaneously break out of your way at the front of a crowd. there’s a great chance the crowd will break and you can then “part the seas” as you move through it. A slight smile goes a long way with gunslinging to keep curiosity mixed in and soften you up slightly. and means people scurrying will tend to defer to you. if you choose to try it.then two. They assume that someone or something important is coming through. makes you look powerful. which creates quite a stir. with just a dash of cockiness mixed in. rolling your heels and hips. remember to smile . moving slowly. So. if you want someone to pass you on your left. so get the fundamentals down first. Then. you look at one point off into the distance where you’re walking.don’t try to “look hard”. You can “direct traffic” by which hand you hold up as people are walking towards you. quite an impression. and quite an entrance.

though it’s tricky to get. Do not cross your arms over your chest for this reason. Don’t go overboard with it. standing up straight. squished between two other customers as he waited for his drink. The Gunslinger’s Walk is a potential nuclear reactor in your social toolbox. Picture the way a U. Do not put your hands in your pockets or cross them over your chest. or get high on the power… Looking powerful when standing If you want to have a powerful presence while standing than the first rule is to take up space. Marine would stand when at ease. Once you get it though. look up. Your weight should generally be towards the rear of your soles (closer to the heel) so that you always appear to be leaning back. it’s invaluable. When you’re standing. was a clear example of standing in a less than powerful way. Looking powerful while sitting What you want to communicate is that you do not make any apologies for your existence and that you are used to always being comfortable. shoulders pulled back. Looking down even has been proven to have a bad effect on your mental state. it’s a sign of weakness and also looks unattractive. Sliding forward slightly in your seat will allow you to lean back even in a vertically-backed chair. You can observe this in others. 29 . you want to stand with your feet shoulder-width apart or slightly wider. and chest somewhat out. In the example we used earlier about the guy in the bar. Your hands should drape at your sides the way they naturally fall. In that example the man clearly gave up his power to the other two customers who forced him to stand there uncomfortably. never look down.Social Superstar traffic”. Your upper body should ideally be leaning back without hunching over. Your stance should project confidence. so have fun and use it wisely. The main communication here is that you are comfortable and confident. If you need to look away. Keep your head up. but one which clearly does not lend itself to laziness. Useful tactics to convey this include draping your arms over the backs of chairs or over the seatbacks of booths or couches.S. especially in nightclubs. Feet and legs can be spread moderately or crossed ankle-to-knee. It should not be an uncomfortable stance.

It’s going to feel weird for awhile. Walk at about 50% of your normal speed when in the venue. an exit. butt. etc).” Practice this in the mirror if you suspect they are moving unnaturally.COM Being Confident As I mentioned earlier…there’s a bonus beyond the initial differences that changing your body language communicates to the outside world. When you walk or move. Don’t believe me? Try it. you will naturally be projection power and confidence as you walk. Just what we were going for. When you are moving towards something (a set. Seriously. exerting about the same amount of pressure (no smooshing). Either way. this works. a clear one. even if they aren’t selfaware enough to know why. The outer world touches our inner one. the bathrooms. because it’s different and new. you also change the way you think. and you project confidence to all comers. and eventually it won’t feel weird. Except that you are standing like you are confident. you look better standing straight. and a clean one. Your hands should swing naturally at your sides while you walk but without looking either stiff or “floppy. Women find you more attractive. Cause and affect get blurred. though.The Best of TSBMAG. Now walk away from the wall. the object is to convey dominance and purpose. shoulders. Looking confident while walking If you read and follow the Gunslinger Walk as discussed above. Pick a wall and stand up straight against it. Your feet. The Japanese have long held the belief that a cluttered home leads to a cluttered mind. In fact. take the shortest route 30 . Co-workers and those around you often might comment that you seem…different. it’ll start to feel good. but hold the pose for 5 minutes. You’ll find yourself with this new confidence that wasn’t there before and doesn’t seem to have much of an explanation. like someone stuck a pole up your ass. It also can change your inner one. and when you change the way you move. and you wind up feeling a certain way just because you are acting that way. and head should all touch the wall. Keep going. How do you feel? Right.

A relaxed and powerful person tends to appear very confident. Slowing down and taking deliberate actions Watch a few James Bond films. In an upcoming chapter on interpersonal communication rules I will go over the correct ways to interact with others.Social Superstar possible—usually a straight line. Looking confident while standing If you are slumped over. and healthy. and even appearing depressed. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. you will naturally become more confident in your interactions. optimistic. We will go into more detail regarding posture in the following chapter. 31 . lack of confidence. Looking confident while sitting The best way to appear confident while sitting is to follow the advice for both looking relaxed and powerful. or if your head hangs down. Try learning how to turn your head slowly. but for right now it is important to know that standing erect (not "stuck up") gives the impression that the person is confident. when moving through the crowd. This will radiate from you. self-assured. Similarly. Once again. walk straight up with confidence. simply following the rules for looking relaxed and powerful will make you appear more confident as you stand there. He’s just too cool. alert. This makes a huge impact on how others perceive you. you want to project dominance. Have you ever noticed that James Bond never looks like he doesn’t know how to act? And that he never fidgets or behaves nervously? Everything James does is a little slower than it should be. Once you have a foundation for the laws of interaction. or shuffling your feet. Instead of circling a set several times like a vulture. how to blink slowly. Oftentimes women notice you and the way you move or interact with people and they make judgments about you before you’ve even noticed them. slouching. you give the impression of having low self esteem.

Habit 3: Keep your muscles relaxed. Tell your friends to point this out to you. and take big slow steps. While doing the talking you should be holding eye contact for the majority of the time. A smile displays a positive energy that is infectious. it hurts”. In the beginning you will need to constantly be checking yourself. The idea is to take up some space. If someone else is talking to you. Create a little game with yourself to remind yourself to pay attention to your posture. This means your head should be high. If you’re talking to a group of people switch eye contact up between the different members of the group… but always be holding it with someone. This is another habit you will have to check often to avoid falling back into the old habit of slouching. shoulders back.COM This kind of body language transmits the message: “I’m so comfortable in my own skin. chest puffed out a bit.The Best of TSBMAG. This is especially true when walking through a bar… you never want to give off the vibe that you’re looking for the cool place to 32 . hold eye contact about 50% of the time. Spread yourself out a bit. Habit 6: You should keep your feet about as far apart as your shoulders. but don’t be afraid to get comfortable. Habit 4: Smile often. You need to keep your face free of this stress. Habit 8: Walk with confidence and power. Try never to appear to be in a hurry or flustered. When we tend to get nervous we tense up in the jaw. Look around slowly and smoothly. neck up. If you don’t have a naturally attractive smile than you should practice in front of a mirror. Your new body language habits to implement immediately Habit 1: Make it a practice to hold eye contact with everyone that you meet. Also walk with direction. This is especially true of your facial muscles. Don’t slouch and look sloppy. Habit 5: Push your chest out a bit and pull your shoulders back. Habit 7: Take up space when you sit. don’t dart around and jolt your head around like you have been drinking espressos all day long. Habit 2: Get in the habit of walking around with your head up and your neck straight.

David DeAngelo commonly recommends his students to watch "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. Every gesture you make should flow naturally at the same speed as your previous gestures. Think Jim Morrison. Rock Star Posture A signature of any rockstar is their posture. If you’re grabbing a drink off the bar take it at a speed that says “I’m in no hurry. A man becomes more attractive when he exhibits grace and poise. You want to give off the vibe that you know where it is and already are heading there. It's like he is embodying the hypnotic characteristics that make romance novels so popular. Tommy Lee." In the movie Michael Caine's character teaches Steve Martin's character how to be a European style gentleman. you can have the same hypnotizing poise as Jim Morrison. Habit 10: Use hand gestures when telling a story. how to blink slowly. He is promising chivalry. and are routinely making the necessary adjustments. If you’re giving a girl a once over. gestures. and poise. and gentleness. They had their audiences hypnotized by their movements.” Try learning how to turn your head slowly. How to improve your posture 33 . Most of us have downright horrible posture… let alone rockstar posture. Think Billy Idol. grace. Think Lenny Kravitz. Habit 9: Avoid making sudden hyper gestures.Social Superstar be. The good news is that if you make yourself constantly aware of how your body appears. These guys knew how to command a stage with their bodies. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. elegance. The trick to pulling all these habits together is to use slow calculated gestures. If you want to see an example of a man going through this transformation. do it slowly like it doesn’t embarrass you that she noticed. It is also the grace in which they move across the stage. When talking to someone avoid clutching on to your beer or putting your hands in your pocket. It takes a constant and conscious effort to achieve rockstar posture.

6. Make sure your earlobes are in line with the middle of your shoulders. When standing straight up. and hips. Good posture involves training the body to stand. make sure that your weight is evenly distributed on your feet. but the spine itself curves in a slight 'S'. and look stupid. 3. Or any movie starring George Clooney. Stretch the top of your head toward the ceiling. Hold your head up straight with your chin in. Do not tilt your pelvis forward. and pulling your head back in to your chest. Now follow the above steps: 1. You'll need to constantly be watching yourself.COM Most people don't even know what good posture is. you might not have the money to hire their trainer… but that doesn't mean you can't emulate their posture and poise. 4. Keep your shoulders back. If you're serious about working on your posture you better get comfortable standing in front of a mirror. shoulders. If you've got a mirror nearby go to it right now and align your ears.The Best of TSBMAG. but you don't. Tuck your stomach in. Sure. Most people think that to "stand up straight" means tensing your back to heave your chest 'in and up'. 2. walk. these are the curves found from the base of your head to your shoulders and the curve from the upper back to the base of the spine. Do not tilt your head forward. You might feel like you are leaning forward. These guys are trained by professionals to be the embodiment of a movie star. or Brad Pitt. sit and lie in positions where the least strain is placed on supporting muscles and ligaments. 5. your knees straight and your back straight. It shouldn't hurt at all if you try this. Stretching and exercise to improve posture 34 . If you're unaware of what good posture looks like rent some James Bond movies. you're probably forcing your back into an unnatural position. The arches in your feet should be supported. Tom Cruise. When you tell someone to work on their posture they automatically start walking around like they are in the Marines. If it does. backward or sideways. This isn't the posture you should be striving for. These points make a straight line. The spine has two natural curves that you need to maintain called the 'double C' or 'S' curves.

35 . 2. Keeping your hands on your shoulders. then alternate 10 reps for each arm singularly. Do 10 repetitions with both arms. Remember to keep your ears aligned! Bend forearms toward shoulders to touch your shoulder blades. While you wait for a web page to load. raise both elbows (count one. You're not looking to build muscle mass… so you don't need to do the exercises with a large amount of weight. Raise both arms out to sides at shoulder length. You should at least feel a slight fatigue in the shoulder muscles. When you first begin to improve your posture you might find that you neck or back will tend to get a little sore. As you'll find in later chapters… a social superstar is looking for every excuse he can to find new ways to mingle with people and make new friends. 1. constantly checking your alignment! If ten reps are too many to start. curl your back upwards. and touch your shoulders with your hands. toast to pop. left. counting to ten as you raise arms. If you have the time I good idea might be to take a yoga class. Think about being able to place a bowl in the hollow of your back. do as many as you can. You'll be surprised how much exercise fits into 30 seconds. counting ten as you lower. and gently massage your neck. alongside your ears.Social Superstar You want to do exercises that strengthen the muscles across your back and shoulders. and your ears aligned. Do as many reps as your wait allows. A yoga class is a perfect example of one of these methods. Align your ears over your shoulders. right). two). 3. back. On your hands and knees. Be a penguin. I'd probably start my day off doing them to feel fresh and add some extra energy to my morning. Do ten reps. as it may cause further strain. Slowly lower arms to sides. and then the opposite. This is why it is important to do some of the following stretches: Tilt (stretch) your head in all four directions over your shoulders (forward. When you first make the commitment to improve your posture you should repeat these exercises several times per day. two) and lower them back to your waist (count one. you can even do these exercises without hand weights. Avoid rolling in a circle. Slowly raise arms back to shoulder height. Align ears with shoulders. Hold for a slow count of ten. like a cat. Raise both arms straight up. In fact. place elbows at your side. or the microwave to beep.

if it does not. • • • Standing Stand with weight mostly on the balls of the feet. Keep both feet flat on the floor. If you're following the body language advice laid out in the previous chapter on these three areas you'll have already noticed a significant natural improvement in your posture. Let arms hang naturally down the sides of the body. standing. In this position. the head is carried too far forward (anterior head carriage). a footrest can be used along with the office chair. Stand against a wall with shoulders and bottom touching wall. and walking.COM As we discussed in the previous section on body language there are 3 general times the superstar needs to be keenly aware of his posture… and constantly working on improving it. Align your back with the back of the office chair. Tuck the chin in a little to keep the head level. Be sure the head is square on top of the neck and spine. not with weight on the heels. 36 . with shoulders upright. Avoid locking your knees. These 3 areas are sitting. If there's a problem with feet reaching the floor comfortably. But we know by now that "Rockstar Posture" is crucial for a superstar… here are some more ways you can improve in these areas. and heels are all aligned. not pushed out forward Stand straight and tall. Make sure your neck. • • • • • Keep feet slightly apart. the back of the head should also touch the wall . Sitting • • Sit in an office chair.The Best of TSBMAG. back. about shoulder-width. Avoid slouching or leaning forward. Flex your arms at a 75 to 90 degree angle at the elbows. Keep your shoulders straight. You may have to adjust the office chair. especially when tired from sitting in the office chair for long periods.

Each of these emotions are easily expressed through our eyes. The most important thing to realize when working on improving your posture is that bad posture is like a bad habit. The Eyes One of the most important and critical components of displaying powerful and confident body language is the eyes. This means that for a couple months it is necessary that you are consciously aware of your posture. then doesn't is make sense to have them hypnotized by your eyes and your understanding of their wants and desires? You can do this by using your eyes to build rapport. There are six basic emotions in the human race. Keep shoulders properly aligned with the rest of the body. Standing in front of a mirror for a couple days practicing won't get you lasting results. disgust. A glance into someone's eyes can often reveal if they are experiencing happiness. And we all know how hard habits are to break.Social Superstar Walking • • Keep the head up and eyes looking straight ahead. surprise. If you want lasting results you need to find a way to engrain this into your mind for a couple months. fear. or keep an index card in your pocket with the words "Rock Star Posture" on it. and create a feeling of arousal in the person you are trying to attract. Just be glancing into someone's eyes you can often tell what is going on inside their mind. There is an accepted idea that most people will judge other people within the first five seconds of meeting them." This statement is powerful because not only does it acknowledge the fact that we can read other people by simply looking into their eyes. set your phone alarm to go off randomly as a reminder. Our eyes reveal more about us than any other part of our body. The eyes are often referred to as "the windows to the soul. or sadness. If this is really the case. anger. Tie a string on your finger. It is probably most effective if you find a way to constantly be reminding yourself to be in tune with it. Avoid pushing your head forward. but that other people can read us by looking into ours. 37 .

and moving past the men they are not. This acknowledgement could come in the form of a smile. In later chapters we will go into more details about picking up women. If you make eye contact with a woman it is a good idea to give an acknowledgement to let them know you have noticed and are interested. Looking up in response to a question or while telling a story is fine. When you are talking to anyone it is generally accepted that you use the 70% rule in the United States. knowing that you are always being watched… it is important to use eye contact correctly and efficiently.The Best of TSBMAG. and marketing yourself.COM When it comes to presenting confident body language. Women on the other hand. you should always give one in return if you are interested. For instance. Keep the focus of attention on the person you are talking to. and the various rules and insights that go along with the process. But it is important to know how to correctly use that eye power as to not intimidate or scare away the person that you are trying to attract. In this chapter I want to discuss ways in which you need to continually be aware of how you can use your eyes to your advantage. then chances are you misunderstood her eye contact. This is why it is important that if she gives you an acknowledgement. Caress your partner with your eyes as you gaze into their eyes. When you intentionally break eye contact. but looking up to break eye contact is often thought of as waning interest. all of the experts will agree that strong eye contact indicates a powerful presence. or eye brow raise. nod. do not break to look at another person." This triangle extends from the ends of the eyebrows to the tip of this person's nose. 70% of the time you will at the other person in the "eyes triangle. giving second glances to the men they are interested. men tend to fix their gaze on one or two particular women in a setting… not paying attention to the many other women that might be watching them. will casually scan the room. As we will discuss in later chapters. 38 . It is important to know that men and women have different comfort levels in regards to the amount of eye contact that they are willing to give and receive. to the left. do so by looking down. If you don't get an acknowledgement back. or to the right. When you break eye contact. In this chapter I want to give you some various pointers in regards to the use of eye contact in regards to body language. But eye contact in regards to picking up women is something that I will discuss more later.

Attraction increases as mutual gazing increases. is that confident people have much more frequent eye contact with their conversational partners. instead of looking at their conversation partner’s face. The more eye contact you can maintain. they tend to be more self-disclosing about personal subjects. They often contract when discussing issues that bring them sadness. the higher self esteem you actually rate yourself on. Others rarely interrupt two people engaged in a conversation if they have consistent eye contact. Women are better non-verbal communicators than men. Pupils also enlarge when people are talking about things that bring them joy or happiness. The longer your eye contact. 39 . Men can improve though. Women engage in more eye contact them men do. When women are engaged in a great degree of eye contact.Social Superstar Here is some scientific research on eye contacted as found in Kevin Hogan's book Irresistible Attraction: • • • • Generally speaking. the greater the intimacy that is felt inside. tending to look downward or away. Eye contact has been show to be a significant factor in the persuasion process. One reason men aren't as good in reading body language is hat men often communicate sitting or standing side by side and don't see as much non-verbal communication as women do. the more self esteem you are perceived to have. the longer the eye contact between two people. • • • • • • • Researchers have discovered that one of the most striking differences between people who are socially confident and those who are shy. Many shy people never make eye contact at all. When eye contact decreases mend tend to disclose more and women tend to disclose less.

COM Most North Americans. a struggle for dominance over another can often be signaled by a staring contest. except in very rare situations. or that you are looking around for someone else you would rather talk with. a friendly gaze will do. If it really bothers you to look directly into another person’s eyes. Avoid intense. especially Caucasians. If you gaze generally at the eyebrow area or the bridge of the nose. you can look at the person’s face without focusing solely on the eyes. keep the majority of your focus on the other person. prefer to have a lot of eye contact when they are talking with someone.The Best of TSBMAG. others have the opposite problem. While some people have difficulty maintaining eye contact during conversations. The very phrase "shifty-eyed" connotes a person whose eyes dart around the room. often making their conversation partners feel very uncomfortable. not all people who stare piercingly at others mean it as 40 . In humans too. It can be very unpleasant to be on the receiving end of an intense stare. your conversation partner may assume that you are bored. the use of staring is part of a power struggle to determine which animal is dominant over the other. or with another person. this is close enough to the eye region that you will appear to be looking at the person’s eyes. Whenever you are in conversation with someone. If you have difficulty knowing exactly how to make eye contact. you can benefit from practicing in front of a mirror. When you are speaking with someone who is from a culture that prefers a lot of eye contact. If you glance around the room too much. In many animals. be sure to keep looking at that person frequently while you are talking. even while you are wondering what to say next. When a person doesn't make eye contact with them. implying that they are untrustworthy. prolonged staring into another person’s eyes. particularly at close range. Although some people use staring intently as a deliberate tactic to intimidate others. You don’t need to use a piercing stare. or look too frequently at other people. North Americans tend to assume that person is hiding something. You may find that it eases your own discomfort if you let your vision go slightly out of focus. They stare too intently into other people’s eyes when they are talking to them.

Even within North America. In many cultures around the world.Social Superstar an act of aggression or dominance. They want to see your eyes. If you wear sunglasses. • Start with your eyes. this is not true of all people. Some people who stare very intently into the eyes of others are quite unaware of the negative impression they are creating. there are some cultural groups that prefer not to make very much eye contact. you can frequently glance away for brief periods. desirable thing to do. and by gazing at the entire face as well as the eyes. nodding. If you are dealing with someone who has different cultural practices than what you are used to. make an effort to be sensitive to the expectations of the other person if you want to have a smooth relationship. These tips are from Kevin Hogan's Irresistible Attraction. Are they clear or are they bloodshot? People who look at you will notice and the clearer your eyes the more attractive people will perceive you to be. it can be a shock to find out that eye contact is not always welcomed. Key Components of Hypnotic eyes These are some ideas that you can take with you for using your eyes as a tool for marketing yourself better. In North America. If it has been your habit to stare intently into the eyes of other people without looking away. people of African American and First Nations origin usually prefer to make far less eye contact than Caucasians do. get ready to take them off. you may have been making your conversation partners very uncomfortable. 41 • . In addition. Although most North Americans like to have a lot of eye contact with their conversational partner. Hey can add Mystery. If you have grown up in a cultural group that expects eye contact. You can lighten the impression you are making by smiling more often. averting your eyes and keeping them lowered is considered the polite. There are many countries in the world where looking someone in the eye is considered to be disrespectful and an invasion of privacy. but ultimately people want to see what they are getting.

you can shrug your eyebrows at her to let her know you’re interested. the wink is nonetheless a fantastic means of communication. Look at the person you are talking to about 70% of the time when communicating with them. you are looking away and to the right when you open your eyes. Avoid looking at others for any length of time when you are with someone who may be special. and shows a strong degree of social confidence and awareness on your part. 42 . or is expecting a response . If you want to attract someone. It’s sufficiently mysterious that it gets girls wondering. This is the version that puts more social pressure on the girl (to qualify herself or retract a remark). A quick. Look at a woman from shoulders up and she will think you have depth and personality. The wink is a great way to respond to a woman when she asks you a question you don’t feel like answering if she’s giving you a hard time… 3. It is often done subconsciously by both men and women . Remember the longer they have eye contact with you the more emotional arousal they are experiencing inside. consider contacts or surgery. subtle shrug of the eyebrows (sometimes held longer) can also be used to express interest. An eyebrow shrug can signify that a person is surprised. Not everyone can do this. Slow. or make a note when she shrugs hers at you. Raising both eyebrows can be used to show a number of different moods and expressions. A favorite of television rakes and seducers. In the other. because she’s interested too. look at them. as in. “Did you actually just say that?” Two versions: in one. This is an easy and effective way of communicating disbelief. hard blink (two eyes). Wink (one eye).COM • • • • • • If you wear glasses. 5 non verbal gestures you should master using your eyes 1. but most folks can.this is the more playful (still with some social pressure) version.The Best of TSBMAG. 2. you are looking straight at the girl when you open your eyes . Eyebrow shrug. People need to see your can almost be used as a dare or challenge. Make the person feel like they are the only person in the room that could possibly catch your eye.

These are the elements that make up an interaction. If you are meeting a client or friend and you know that they are right handed sit to his right. If you look at a woman and squint. When most people think of good conversationalists they automatically think the ability to talk well. This is when you look at a woman like she just said the most retarded thing you’ve ever heard.Social Superstar 4. you pull your lips into a half-smile (with one side of your mouth). In the previous three sections we discussed how critical body language. posture. 43 . You will see that many men who are good with women squint while they are talking to them. and simultaneously shrugging your eyebrows. it can seem like you are sizing her up and trying to decide if you like her a lot. while kind-of laughing/huffing in a “I can’t believe she said that” way. the simple act of selecting where you sit can display dominant alpha characteristics that will also facilitate the communication process. or alternatively that you doubt the truth or accuracy of something that is being said. If he is left handed sit to his left. These guys don't always say a lot but they have the amazing ability to communicate more in glances and movements than most guys do in entire sentences. Ultra-skeptical look. As we will discuss in future chapters… the ability to talk well is one of the most important characteristics of a superstar. But in there is more to an interaction than just words. The squint is a way of saying that you are thinking about something. Intrapersonal Communication Rules One of the hallmarks of a superstar is the way in which he interacts with other people. You hold this look and stare at her until she gives into the social pressure. Think James Bond. Here are some basic rules about choosing your seat in different circumstances. Squint. But even the interaction itself plays apart in how you come looking out of it. What I mean by this is that there are certain rules that you can follow that will always present you in the best possible light. as the most socially conscious in the room. and your eyes are in creating a seductive hypnotic presence. Think Don Draper. For instance. 5. It helps to place them in the position of being the slightly skeptical selector. Basically.

Entering this space is done so at your own risk. When you find the ones that look best. practice them. it just means that when you do enter this space you are doing so strategically and with specific intention. When you are communicating with another person you need to be consciously aware of your facial expressions and hand gestures. sparkling eyes. This is the ideal way because by videotaping yourself in a social situation you get to see how your face naturally contorts while in conversations. This doesn't mean you can't lean in to share a secret with him or her.The Best of TSBMAG. If you are attempting to communicate well with a female in business or a social setting. These are the first thing someone notices about you during conversation. relaxed countenance that responds to conversation with a natural smile looks of alertness and interest. The first is to stand in front of a mirror and try out different expressions. which is 19 inches to 4 feet.COM If you are attempting to persuade another man you should be sitting across from each other. The second way to practice facial expressions is with the aid of a video camera. if you leave the "casual personal" space of the other person. Whether seated or standing you should stay out of the other person's intimate space. This is more "real" than looking in a mirror as you will have the opportunity to see all of your habits in action. 44 . Keep performing them over and over again until it feels natural for your face to contort to those specific expressions. you should be seated across from her at a smaller more intimate table. you also stand the risk of losing the focus of the client. but if positively changes your internal chemistry. A pleasant. and an attentively tilted head are all looks that gain universal approval. And these are "features" that are within your control. Similarly. Intimate space is normally defined as an 18 inch bubble around the entire body of the other person. There are two solid ways to work on facial expressions. Do you find that people often ask you what's wrong? Even when you're completely content? If so it means that you need to seriously work on your facial expressions. A smile not always changes the way people respond to you.

For instance. We will notice things that will probably make us feel embarrassed or ashamed. Now you have specific goals that you want to achieve in regards to your facial expressions. Using your hands Some people talk with their hands. and then once again have someone record you in a social situation. You need to be your own publicist. and eye contact habits that you may want to work on. Hand gestures generally take place in a square area defined up and down by the waist to the neck. But it is imperative that you face this. It is incredible how much we don't know about ourselves until we carefully study ourselves on film. models. posture. The use of a video camera can also really help you identify the body language. Trust me. This is exactly the kind of training movie stars. It is much more graceful and relaxing to cup your hands together. nervous gestures such as tapping your fingers on a table and picking at your face or nails can make you look insecure. the guy who uses flailing. this will be an uncomfortable exercise for most of us. There is a lot that can be communicated with the hands. Likewise.Social Superstar Once you've identified the habits that you want to change. This is why you must be conscious of what your hands are saying. 45 . and perfect your smile. then you must find new expressions to replace them with. jerking or broad movements pushes people away be defining large space around off limits. darting. and from side to side by the width of your shoulders. You can continue this process several times until you get rid of all of your nervous ticks. Work on it. and overcome it. It is at this point that the use of a mirror will come in handy. and musicians go through with their stylists and publicist. unfavorable expressions. People from across the room can observe you and learn a lot about you by the way you use your hands in conversation.

It is known that girls use this tactic all of the time in bars and clubs to make their judgments on guys. Building an online social resume allows you influence many more people with much less effort. anyone can become an “expert” on any subject in a short period of time. I believe that you should view your social life in the same way. We want to be able to quickly classify a person into a certain group. the real estate world. the testimonials they have. and the appearances they’ve made. This is why it is taught in the community that you need to create social proof through being the most social guy in 46 . you would need to belong to several trade organizations.and then put that social proof on auto-pilot. so that we know how to approach and deal with them.The Best of TSBMAG. Building Your Social Resume If you use the above formula for “becoming an expert” and apply it to “becoming a social superstar” you will quickly see your social status sky rocket! We human beings don’t have the time or energy to really dig deeply to find out the truth about someone… so we look for the clues that will make these judgments easy for us.COM Chapter 4: Building Your Social Resume Your Objective: The objective of building your social resume is to create massive social proof for yourself. have a bunch of happy customers . This means that in order to coin yourself an expert in say. With this definition… in all likelihood. and have performed some speaking engagements or received some media coverage relating to the subject. Your Plan: In The Four Hour Work Week Tim Ferriss points out that in today’s world the definition of an expert is largely created through the affiliations he or she belongs to.

If you want to be viewed as a Social Rockstar… become one! Elements of the resume 47 . twittered the news. Pete. and I added to our social resume when we attended the party at Playboy Mansion. who do you know?” and so on. The value in the trip to the Mansion wasn’t the girls we were going to hit on there. Pete the Freshman. While I completely agree with this theory… I believe that you should take it a step further and position yourself as a Rockstar. It is a simple theory really. and you make appearances at the right venues. A couple months ago Mike Stoute. The value came from the pictures we took. How do you do this? You do this the same way a so-called expert builds his resume. Do you think that created some instant social proof? We never even had to bring it up in a conversation. You affiliate with other rockstars. Sure I had a vague curiosity to party at the Mansion… but I knew it wouldn’t be nearly as fun as some of my rendezvous in Brazil. Mike. The results were immediate. Then why did I trek across the country to go there? Simple. Immediately after attending the event. Within hours of changing our Facebook status to “Partying at the Playboy Mansion” we each had girls we hadn’t spoken to in years leaving us comments and emails with questions like “How did you guys get in the party?” “I heard that it was a private party. Last week when we attended a reunion at our former college. and I plastered our Facebook pages with the pictures. as someone would inevitably ask us about it.Social Superstar the place and then using routines and stories in your conversations that further exemplify your high social status. I was further solidifying my position as a Rockstar. the news of our adventure in the Mansion had already spread like wildfire… and we’re continually pressed and praised about it. you get testimonials. and wrote detailed accounts of the experience that we emailed all of our friends. and the stories we are now able to continually tell about the experience. or even this past Mansformation Weekend.

facebook. my pictures from the Mansion create the image of a guy who is invited to high profile-hard to get into parties. You have to view your Facebook friends as a master marketer views his list. Testimonials: What other people are saying about you. Associations: The people you are perceived to hang out with. Appearances: The places you are perceived to be spending your time. These two accounts (I prefer Facebook) will be constantly marketing your unique selling points. and your appearances. but you’re better off learning from an expert. Facebook is your list. If you couple these pictures with another group of pictures from one other exclusive event… you’ll be perceived as the kind of guy who regularly attends these sorts of events.mention this manuscript and I will send you a link to an hour long podcast I did with Race de Preist on effectively using Facebook to meet women. proof comes from your associations.The Best of TSBMAG. If you’re new to it Race and Kelly give a couple fantastic tips for getting hot girls to leave comments on your page. If you're on Facebook simply send me a friend request: http://www. Once you have a platform for showcasing your “proof” you need to start acquiring it. This is because it is more important to create the image of… then to be consistently living it. If you don’t have an account…GET ONE! You have to view these accounts as your publicity machine. your testimonials. You probably noticed that I used the word perceived in the above definitions. a list is what creates sales… a list is what spreads word of mouth. Remember. 48 . The testimonials are easy to get… if you’re living the life.COM The number one tool that you have in creating your social resume is your Facebook and Myspace accounts. For example. people will naturally be talking about you and leaving comments on your page. To a marketer. This is an area you do not want to slack off in.php?id=515434783 When I receive your friend request. I could write an entire post about the specifics of creating your Facebook or Myspace profile. and a list is what connects a marketer to his

facebook.php?id=515434783 49 .php?af=795295 Remember: Befriend me on Facebook and I will send you an hour long podcast that goes much more into detail on the subject of using Facebook for meeting women and building your social Superstar http://www. http://www.

50 . Your Plan: Decide exactly what kind of guy you want to be If you really intend on changing your identity and thriving in a social world. You need to have a clear vision of your end result if you intend on getting there. and being. Once you create a well-thought out. you must first be fully aware of how you intend on looking. thinking. acting. It is important to remember that other people must be lead to believe this on their own. It should convey that you are so focused on your own goals. You must ask yourself the critical questions: What would my "new self" think in this situation? What would he say? How would he act? And at all times you need live and breathe that identity. The attitude and values you possess on the inside will directly relate to the way you are perceived on the outside. Your attitude should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are a scarce commodity. Your attitude should convey the fact that you "are going places" and probably won't be around this scene forever. feeling. passions. This must all be completely fleshed out. not only in your mind. but down on paper as well. Building up your inner game will be make you the kind of person people like to be around.description of the person you intend on becoming… you need to keep this vision in your mind as often as possible.COM Chapter 5: The Attitude (liking + scarcity) Your Objective: The objective of your attitude is to establish both liking and must never verbally tell them or act in a way that you feel you are superior to them and will leave them behind. The attitude you present to the world should establish you as a likeable person. and commitments that your time is extremely limited.The Best of TSBMAG.

There is no use re-living them. And in the future. ask yourself "what did I learn" and write down your answer in as a positive statement. Then forget the failure and move on. It is your job to not only be concentrating your mind on being this person…. As for your mistakes and failures… as they come along. This will be a never ending habit. when asking yourself how "the new you" would act… you can factor in the quality of perseverance. Were you the spelling bee champion in the 2nd great? Did you hit the winning home run in a little league game? Score a hot chick? Tell a funny joke? These are going to form your new identity. As much as people say "repeat I'm confident over and over" that will not work unless you have some cold hard facts to back it up. and second guessing. But in order to maintain the qualities that uniquely make you… you.Social Superstar Many books will tell you to merely think it enough… and you're subconscious will magically turn you into him. You need to collect as many of these memories and write them down as vividly and descriptively as possible. Anchor vibrant energetic states Personally I find most aspects of NLP unhelpful and annoying… but I have found a great use for the idea of anchoring vibrant energetic states. no matter how big or small. will be added to this list. By creating this list. 51 . Every accomplishment you achieve. If you quit something before finishing it… instead of saying "I'm a failure" simply say. You've already learned everything you need to learn from them. "I learned that success comes from perseverance" And then add that to the quality of the kind of guy you want to be if it isn't already listed. you'll need to take with you your previous successes and accomplishments. You'll notice that as the list grows. you in essence backing up your claim that you are confident and allowing yourself to act that way without feeling like a fraud. Focus on your past successes instead of failures In the quest to reinvent your identity you'll need to leave behind the failures. but actively acting in the way you'd imagine this person to act. All of the negative memories we are going to leave behind. so will your confidences. The positive memories create the foundation of your confidence. doubts.

COM I came across this idea by accident. 52 . If you have a good conversation with a girl at bar. I was unconsciously anchoring these songs to a feeling of an adrenaline rush. I later found that if I listened to these songs. have a headache. making it that much easier to have another success. If you are interested in learning more about anchoring check out a book on the subject. Never be content with just one success. runny nose. your confidence is increased. You need to keep the success momentum going. and I used to listen to the same songs over and over while I ran on the treadmill at the gym. It is extremely hard to get into state when you're tired. but I haven’t been able to do that… so I wouldn't want to give you advice that I cannot personally verify as being true.The Best of TSBMAG. while standing or moving around. cough. For some strange reason the universe loves the concept of momentum… and slumps. then it would go without saying that the one of the most important aspects of self confidence is peak physical health. Build on little successes In the beginning of your identity make over. run down. Whenever you have a success. My Ipod only had a few songs on it at the time. Because certain songs tended to pump me up. During that period of raised confidence it is important to attempt to achieve another form of success. the core attribute your looking to build upon is your sense of self worth and confidence. We've already talked about focusing on past success. You should continually be building on every success you have. Experience Peak Health If self confidence and esteem really come from the inside out. There are people who claim to be able to anchor specific feelings to a certain touch. I tended to bring back that exercise high I used to only experience at the gym. and creating a success journal… but you also need take advantage of the momentum that each success brings. Without knowing it. stomach ache. This is the foundation for everything. or soreness. The more vibrant and energetic we feel inside. before leaving the bar instigate a few more conversations. the more likely we are to radiate these traits outward. I played them more often during the point of the work out where my adrenaline was peaked.

The trick to starting an exercise and healthful eating habit is to make it a must. exercise provides you with an opportunity to anchor vibrant states to yourself as we spoke of earlier. Eating healthy. Eating healthy Exercise is critical.Social Superstar This is why it is important to treat your body like a temple. Also. Don't look at it like you're on a diet. If you are consistently filling up on McDonalds. If you find yourself consistently making excuses as to why you missed a workout. If its snowing out.. This means there are no excuses. Exercise 2. The two keys to peak health: 1. There is a saying "you are what you eat. Think about the last time you finished off a Big Mac or a big dish of General Tso's… did you feel like you could conquer the world? Did you feel attractive? Many people don't realize that a big source of their depression stems from their lack of physical health. and unmotivated. tired. Even without the long term health benefits of changing your diet and exercise you will feel an immediate benefit in the amount of energy you possess. The more discipline you prove you have to yourself. If you're on vacation… you still go. gassy. Instead of having a Taylor ham and cheese bagel and coffee for breakfast. the clarity of your mind. If you're hung over… you still go. greasy. pizza. You'll often feel bloated. get in the habit of eating oatmeal and Green tea. your mind will often follow right behind it. like exercise has to be a must. and Chinese food… your body will respond accordingly. you still go. Once you break your old pattern you will find that the oatmeal fills you up just as much as the bagel and the Green Tea energizes you more than the coffee. Taco Bell. every day you find time to get to the gym. If your body is run down from eating badly and not exercising.. you will begin to accept this behavior from yourself. You will find that once you get into a consistent exercise habit your confidence will begin to sky rocket. Look at is simply as the way you eat. and your 53 ." This saying has a lot of truth to it. the easier it will become. your level of motivation. You must force yourself to change your diet permanently.

in nice clothes. At first I never understood why they bothered. I used to have the mentality that if I'm not going to see anyone. and change back into their nice clothes before heading home. What I noticed though was that a couple of my Spanish employees would come to work every day looking sharp. Later in the day when it was time to leave. Stay Well Groomed. What I want you to get out of this section is that it is always important to look and feel your best. I soon discovered that I was often depressed and felt very discouraged with myself. Then once they got to work. they would wash up. These benefits carry over into all areas of your life. This will keep you motivated and inspired. You need to look in the mirror and be proud of how you come across. tanning.The Best of TSBMAG. But this was a horrible mentality to have. plucking my eyebrows. But then I came to understand that this was how they kept their dignity. In the chapter on making yourself more attractive I gave many hints on how you can increase your physical attractiveness. When we want to buy something we want a voice appears in our head saying "no you can't afford that" or "shouldn't you buy something more useful?" When we want to talk to a girl or apply for a job a voice in our head says "don't. or keeping up my appearance the day's I was working.COM increased pride in yourself discipline. in dirty clothes. Because my job entailed me to where old painter's clothes and often find myself covered in paint… I would often decide that it wasn't worth shaving. or wearing nice clothes. Say yes to yourself As children we so often hear the word "no" or "you can't" that we grow up inflicting ourselves with these words. Because the one and only person you really need to impress is yourself. I would look in the mirror and see a scruffy. what is the point of shaving. they would change into their work clothes. unkempt guy. even when no one is watching." 54 . fixing my hair nice. and would feel like that was all I was. trimming my nose hairs. This is how they separated themselves from their job. doing my hair. Well Dressed I discovered this principle when I was working as a paint contractor.

and bam your life is changed." "You can get it next year" How can you ever get what you really want if you are your own biggest obstacle in achieving it? The step to reversing this is to practice saying yes to yourself. They are the place that we crawl back to avoid facing defeat in other areas. If you didn't have yourself in your ear telling you "no" how many more girls would you have approached? How many more classes would you have taken? Jobs applied for? Friends made? Even if you only achieved a fraction of the extra dreams you went for. 55 . Order whatever it is you want on the menu regardless of price. Do you really enjoy playing World of Warcraft 7 hours a day… or is it easier than admitting to yourself that you're scared to talk to girls. some guys its porn. We tell ourselves all of the same excuses that our parents told us.. It will reshape the way you live your life. Get in the habit of allowing yourself to have the things you want. "You're too young" "You only wind up breaking it" "You'll hurt yourself" "You'll lose it" "You have to be fair" "You can't afford it. Crutches are things that we use to avoid reality. or our teachers or relatives told us. This means that quitting a dead end part time job and focusing 100% on your dream. It means cutting off your "booty call" and finding a girl that inspires you. This will set precedence. for some guys it fantasy football. For some guys their crutch is video games. It means going for broke. or one beautiful women to fall in love with you. or one professor to see your hidden brilliance in a subject. Apply for a job that you have no qualifications for. Whatever it is that we want we are often the first person to talk ourselves out of it.Social Superstar We are unconsciously embedding the word no into our minds. While there is nothing wrong with having a hobby… the problem arises when you hide yourself in your hobby. how much would this have improved your life? It only takes one great employer to give you a chance despite your shoddy resume. Eliminate Your Crutch/Burn Your Ships To fully develop unstoppable inner game and the winning attitude it is necessary to burn our ships and get rid of our crutches. or apply yourself. It also means eliminating your crutches….

Say something that surprises you. crank out an extra rep or two.COM The hardest thing I ever had to do a few years back was quit the restaurant I was working in. Things won't get boring. add a bit more resistance. but it makes your life exciting. I would head over to the restaurant and drink with my buddies. Embrace Your Passions 56 . Quitting the job not only meant burning my ships (as the job provided me with money. whenever I experienced a set back at the real estate agency I was working at. How do you achieve this? This push yourself one step further every day. If you don't have the opportunity to initiate an extra conversation. and dates) but it also meant eliminating my crutch. The objective is to stretch yourself into the largest and greatest rubber band of all time. friends. run an extra minute. The job provided me with a solid wad of cash every week. Try something zany even if it doesn't work this time it will train your mind to look for new ways of doing things.The Best of TSBMAG. close friends. and unlimited females to interact with and date. If you're working on a project. You'll begin to look forward to each day as you'll find yourself continually surprising yourself. and then burn them. Not only does this help you grow as a person. You won't feel trapped. It is important that you push yourself past at least one comfort zone daily. it is just important that you push yourself past it daily. think outside the box. then say something unexpected in one of the conversations you are involved in.. You have to find out what your ships and crutches are. If you are trying to conquer shyness. All was always good there. make an effort to initiate one more conversation every day. I knew deep inside that if I kept working there I would stay comfortable and never achieve my goals of running a successful business or publishing a book. At the time. Yet. If you're going to the gym. or got frustrated with the screenplay I was writing. It doesn't matter what your comfort zone is any area. Push yourself past your comfort zone daily Look at yourself like a rubber band. Life will no longer seem repetitive.

Maybe they decide they want to write children's books. If you don't live up to your own standards. or travel the world. or volunteer for worthy causes. In a later chapter I have reproduced that exercise for you. energizing reason to get out of bed every morning does amazing things for your self esteem. imagine you have this money. Really get inside your mind. unproductive life. or open a bar where they know everyone. You'll often find that achieving life goals and dreams doesn't cost nearly as much as you think.Social Superstar I will go more into detail about embracing your passions in the section on being an interesting person. or train for the Olympics. In Tim Ferriss's book The Four Hour Work Week he gives an exercise called Dreamlining which allows you to see approximately how much money you will need to make to finance your dreams. or paint. You might find that hour becomes your most cherished of the day. You are the only judge of what is important for you. When you find something that drives you… go with it. Let it drive you. Really dwell on it. Let it power you. The trick is to find whatever you would do if time and money were not an object and do it now. Only Seek Approval from Yourself Many people misinterpret the advice to "not care what people think" to be advice recommending living a slovenly. This is not the case. but plant the seed of passion in your mind. If you would write children's books… start writing one now. withdrawn. set a goal to visit another place. they'll decide something completely different. If you want to travel the world… pick one place right now and set a goal to visit it. But in this section I just want to remind you that the more inspired you are on the inside. the more it shows on the outside. or write music. Having a solid. then you're letting yourself down. Don't jump at the first thought that comes into your mind. How do you find your passion? Think to yourself "what would I be doing if I suddenly won $150 million in the lottery. Sure. Spend an hour every night writing. you might not be able to do it in the same capacity now. Once you visit that place. this freedom. What sparks you? Most people think if they won that kind of money that they would want to retire on a beach somewhere… but often when they really think of it. 57 . and then envision yourself in different scenarios.

It is simply advice to live life on your terms and not let the whims of the masses affect your ability to make decisions. And the more you try to please everyone. The first and foremost person you need to please is yourself. 58 . This is not advice to be selfish.The Best of TSBMAG. the more you wind up pleasing no one.COM You can't please everyone.

and authority.but decided that cool is subjective and people might not understand it as a standalone definition. If they don't like you. above all you must be likeable. You must get other people to like you.the kind of person that people want to be around.Be Cool. What makes someone cool? Well everything we talked about in the previous chapter “Look the Part” definitely plays a huge part in appearing cool. captivating or cool. If you want to be captivating. scarcity. People are like sheep. Your Plan: I was originally going to call this chapter. your influence over them will run thin… and you will also not enjoy yourself around them nearly as much. People get bored and uninterested in what is always around. They want to be told what to do. Looking cool is a good way to get people to take notice.Social Superstar Chapter 5: Be Captivating (liking + scarcity + authority) Your Objective: In order to be interesting. The second weapon of influence you must use is that of scarcity. which ultimately you must do to demonstrate that you are cool. The final ingredient to being captivating is possessing a sense of authority. They want to be led. But looking cool doesn’t make you cool. And most importantly they want someone to look up to. These weapons are liking. And how do you demonstrate that you are cool? Be interesting! 59 .you must convey three weapons of influence. They are most fascinated and attached to what they can't have.

surfing. collecting comic books. Some people choose playing Halo 3. tango dancing.The Best of TSBMAG. Some people will take this the wrong way and think they have to load up on useless facts and knowledge… ala Mystery’s “Did you know fish cough?” routine.COM Wallflowers are rarely cool. If you want to be a Social Superstar it is crucial that you become the most interesting person in the room. snowboarding. or golf as a hobby. world travel. hacking into highly secured computer networks. fantasy football. this is the easiest to immediately implement. While they all can be fun and rewarding… how interesting do these hobbies make you appear to other people? What if your hobbies included: Playing in a cover band. World of Warcraft. We can choose anything. volunteer relief aid work. What we choose to make our hobbies is our choice. Why? Because as pretty as they can be… they’re usually like talking to a wall. So how do you “be interesting” you ask? Here are some traits of interesting people that we will explore further: Interesting hobbies Interesting profession Contradictory character traits The dirty little secret Fearless Says less than necessary No where you’re going Never appear too perfect Have interesting hobbies Out of all of the traits. There just doesn’t seem to be anything deeper than the pretty exterior. rock climbing. or race car driving? Do you think other people would take a tad bit more interest in you? 60 . While devouring interesting facts and storing them away for appropriate times can make you sound interesting and does play a small part in a Social Superstar repertoire…it is more important that you be interesting.

This is a guy who marches to the beat of a different drummer. A guy who chooses to learn and compete in tango dancing competitions is an oddity. There is nothing fundamentally fascinating about rock climbing.Social Superstar Your immediate reaction might be to say that simply faking an interest in a hobby is enough. or traveling the world? Maybe words like: Adventurous Passionate 61 . You need to develop passion for these things. Your hobbies give other people the ability to make a snapshot judgment of your personality traits. what personality traits do you associate with someone who spends their free time surfing. The hobby itself is not what makes you interesting. Merely going through the motions of rock climbing. It is actually pretty boring to watch. You need to develop a passion for them that radiates from within your core being. or flying around the world is not enough. You may ask what is more interesting about surfing than golf. playing in a cover band. What would personality traits would most people attach to someone whose hobby was following major league sports or playing video games or golf? Now. And most people are compelled to know why? How many people are genuinely curious as to why you spend your free time shuffling around your fantasy football roster? Not many I would assume. This is where the value of this lesson comes in. Are you starting to get the idea? What you choose to make your hobby tells other people a lot about your personality. This is a guy who goes against the grain. or struggling to surf. But there is something unique and interesting about the type of guy who chooses to spend his free time rock climbing while his friends are sitting in front of a computer playing video games. It is your choice to pursue that hobby which makes you interesting. How many girls admire your dedication to World of Warcraft? How many of those same girls would admire your dedication to volunteering to perform relief work after various catastrophes? What you choose to do with your free time says more about you then anything that comes out of your mouth. It’s not.

you can run a Yahoo Groups or Google Groups search and see if there is already a group of people discussing it. They are a rare commodity in a world where most people act like mindless sheep following along with the herd. Most people are confined to the day to day activities that make up their comfort zone. Finding new. computer hacker. The best way to find out the potential of turning one of your childhood dreams into a current hobby is to begin by searching around the internet. This is what makes these “interesting” people so extraordinary.COM Free spirited Thrill seeking Interesting people are often associated with these sorts of for groups in your area. My first recommendation is to choose a few things that you have a genuine interest in. cave dweller. a space explorer. rock star? Who says you can’t be? In our times it is possible to make a hobby out of any possible thing you may have an interest in. Take some time for a moment and think about the kind of words people would use to describe you. or you can visit specialized travel sites to see what kind of adventure travel they offer. you can search meetup. What were some of your childhood dreams you gave up on? Did you want to be an archeologist like Indiana Jones. In the late Randy Pausch’s Last Lecture he talks about rediscovering your childhood dreams as a way to bringing fulfillment to your life. exciting. The wonderful thing about entering one of these groups is that it presents you with an opportunity to meet new and exciting people that you normally would not have come in contact with.The Best of TSBMAG. and ability to live life outside the comfort zone that is so fascinating to us. It is their drive. Are you a sheep? 62 . It is amazing what you find when you begin to step outside of your comfort zone. And even better. and interesting hobbies is not as hard as it may seem. You can run a general Google search and see what comes up. determination. you’re likely to find a group of people that have made a hobby out of the same exact thing to share experiences with. These new acquaintances might open your eyes to entirely new horizons.

Social Superstar There are more benefits to exploring a new and exciting hobby other than being perceived as interesting. the dream will be fame. but not limited to. as most will. don't put down solving world hunger out of guilt. etc. material wants: house. What would you do if there was no way you could fail? If you were 10 times smarter than the rest of the world Create two timelines. racing ostriches. Dreamlining In Tim Ferriss's brilliant book "The Four Hour Work Week" he gives a phenomenal exercise that will not only help you develop your passion. clothing. All people have their vices and 63 . Most people quit a fitness routine a few weeks after beginning. being (be a great cook.) in that order. For now. and do not concern yourself with how these things will be accomplished. Some people call this “developing character. I am going to take the next section directly from Tim Ferriss's book and urge you follow this advice and create your dreamlines. For some.let alone climb to the top of Mount Everest.and list up to five things you dream of having (including. its unimportant. consider what you hate or fear in each and write down the opposite.” No matter what name you give it the results are the same. car. If you pick a hobby that continually challenges you and forces you to continually dig deep inside to persist… you will grow as a person. The sad truth is that most people don’t even finish a book that they startlet alone persist long enough to make it to the finals of a surf competition in Hawaii. be fluent in Chinese. for others fortune or prestige. If you really want a Ferrari.). You will be looked as sort of an authoritative figure. You will seem to possess a wisdom normally reserved for wise old men. tracing your roots overseas. There is a certain amount of unsaid respect and admiration for the man or woman who does these things. And most people don’t travel out of their state – let alone backpack across South East Asia.).6 months and 12 months. If you have difficulty identifying what you want in some categories. Be sure not to judge or fool yourself. etc.” Others will call it “maturity. but it will also help you understand the means it will take to achieve your dreams. Do not limit yourself. and doing (visiting Thailand. This is an exercise in reversing repression. etc.

The Best of TSBMAG. put it down. consider these questions: a) What would you do. but this column is just a temporary spot for "doing" actions. People find it easier brainstorm "being" first. Identify an action that would characterize this state of being or task that would mean you have achieved it. star or otherwise highlight the four most exciting and/or important dreams from all the columns. most people have a lot of trouble coming up with the defined dreams they're being held from. Here are a few examples: Great cook = make Christmas dinner without help Fluent in Chinese = have a five minute conversation with a Chinese coworker What are the four dreams that would change it all? Using the six month timeline. This is particularly true with the "doing" category. If still blocked. Drawing a blank? For all their bitching about what's holding them back. If something will improve your feeling of self worth. Repeat the process with the 12 month timeline if desired. 64 . fill in the five "doing" spots with the following: • • • • • One place to visit One thing to do before you die (memory of a lifetime One thing to do daily One thing to do weekly One thing you've always wanted to learn What does "being" entail doing? Convert each "being" into a "doing" to make it actionable. In that case.COM insecurities. day to day. if you had $100 million in the bank? b) What would make you excited to wake up in the morning to another day? Don't rush.think about if for a few minutes.

The truth is we all have to earn a living. to outline every step from start to finish. Once you have three steps for each of the four goals. If not rachet it down. This happens after years of naming your current profession when asked “what do you do?” If you say “I’m a painter. Set actions-simple. the required vehicle to achieve them and build momentum with critical first steps. Each should be simple enough to do in five minutes or less.Social Superstar Determine three steps for each of the four dreams in just the six month timeline and take the first steps now. And very few jobs are glamorous. But for the rest of us. Far too many people let their jobs define who they are as a person. The variable change too much and in-the future distance becomes an excuse for postponing action. 65 . For the continuation of this exercise pick up a copy of "The Four Hour Work Week" or visit fourhourworkweek. Do it now. CEO of a fortune 500 company. Identifying yourself with your job is fine if you’re a rock star. First. and living like a Have an Interesting Profession This one is a lot more difficult to control than finding an interesting hobby.” or name any other job too many times you begin to identify yourself with your job. You are much more than your occupation. therefore. If you fall into the unglamorous and mundane… do not be defined by your work. I'm not a believer in long-term planning and far-off goals. tomorrow and the day after. This is a good introduction to dreamlining and illustrates how it can create the needed momentum to set you on the right direction towards achieving your life goals. The objective of this exercise isn't. but to define the end goal. But why not choose a profession that genuinely interests you? Chances are if it genuinely interests you… it probably is interesting to other people as well. actor. or astronaut. In fact. Define three steps for each dream that will get you closer to its actualization.” or “I’m tech support.” or “I’m a real estate agent. CIA agent. complete the three actions in the "now" column. let's focus on those critical first steps. I generally set 3-month and six month dreamlines. well-defined actions-for now. I would never recommend choosing a profession simply because it sounds glamorous. we are cutting ourselves short.

There are countless examples of interesting lower paying jobs out there like tour guide. I would concentrate more on finding a job that you’re passionate about rather than choosing a job strictly for conversation pieces. I’ve made a short list of examples below: • • • • • • • FBI Agent Firefighter Archeologist Any job in film. Hobbies tell more about you anyway… because they are what you choose to do on your free time. mundane. I would spend more energy on finding interesting hobbies. In the pickup/seduction community there is a lot of talk about demonstrating higher value. Do not kid yourself into believing that you don’t. or television Airline pilot Reporter (for legitimate magazine or newspaper) Public Speaker These are just few of the better paying jobs. If you've follow the advice laid out above in regards to discovering your passions and creating hobbies 66 .The Best of TSBMAG. skydiving instructor. Even if the job sounds like the most boring job on the planet. music. Interesting Skills A social superstar has the keen ability to keep everyone in the room focused on him. If you’re starting from scratch and a curious about some examples of interesting jobs. death trap of job… you have options. if you are truly passionate about it. but it is a vehicle for putting your charisma and enthusiasm on display. that will shine through. Passion is not only contagious. street artist… and so on. So while the job itself might not be glamorous… you will appear glamorous performing it.COM I could spend fifty pages trying to talk you into following your dream profession and why it is completely possible that you attain it… but that is beyond the scope of this book. I simply want to point out the fact that if you’re in a boring. I would recommend at the very least finding a job that you’re passionate about.

Kevin would subtly scratch his nose when Daryl sniffed the right card. The Sniffing Card Trick This trick requires a silent partner. Other Magic Tricks I have never been big on magic tricks. Daryl would leave the room while the person chose the card. and eventually choose the right card. While everyone's attention was on Daryl. I suggest taking the advice of some of the most popular dating coaches and gurus and learn some routines that you can bust out at parties. I am going to list this trick along with several other types of skills and routines you can learn to captivate an audience. In my college days I had two good friends Daryl and Kevin who mastered one simple card trick that had audiences captivated every time they performed it. As with all of the different skills I will list. When Daryl came back to the room he would begin sniffing each card.Social Superstar around them. For these guys. Daryl would notice Kevin scratching his nose. continue his performance for a bit. My two friends Daryl and Kevin pulled this off for years in college without anyone ever catching onto it. He would sell the trick well by really smelling the cards and acting as if he was looking for a clue on the card. He would then lay out 7 cards on a table or floor. but with the popularity behind them do to legendary pick up artist Mystery. show it to everyone in the room and then put it back in the row of 7 cards. bars. you will most likely already be developing some interesting traits and skills that are all your own. realize that was the card. I saw Daryl perform the trick countless times and no one ever figured it out. He would then invite someone to take part in the trick. it is important to pick skills that are congruent with your personality. For some guys it takes awhile to fully integrate themselves into a new hobby or passion to the point that they feel it will benefit them in social gatherings. It was a trick that they worked together on. there must be a place for them in this book. Magic tricks worked for Mystery because he was genuinely passionate about magic. I'm not 67 . and gathering that will make you stand out from the crowd. Basically Daryl would pull out a deck of cards and shuffle them around for a bit. Daryl would tell the person to pick out one of the cards. and never revealed the secret of how they accomplished it until years later.

buy them all a drink.. and boat loads of hotties. maybe a round of shots. Learn to Play or Sing one song You're at a bar. John Bon Jovi wanna be seems to have his pick of the litter tonight.The Best of TSBMAG. If they sense that you're the kind of guy who rolls with a large entourage. They 68 .com/2006/10/31/demonstrate-higher-value-withtorn-card-trick/ http://www. make up some bullshit about "leaving town. You casually mention how you sing "insert song you've practiced a million times" really http://www. they will try to appease you. co-workers. and men want to be friends with. Play to their egos. There is also a wonderful resource for guys looking to use magic to improve their game called PUMA Skills. and how much you miss being up on stage. introduce them to some of your hot female friends. The long haired." If you are serious about learning magic and want to try your skills with some more professional tricks you can go to www. but you must have some real interest in the subject matter. its jampacked with friends.tsbmag. If you believe that magic tricks are something that you would like to add to your repertoire of skills you can find some videos of a few good ones on our companion site. your birthday. just getting over a really bad break up…" and 5 out of 10 times the band will invite you on stage to sing the You can also view more magic trick videos by going to Youtube and searching "magic tricks. The trick to this is to learn one song that most cover bands will know… and love to play.COM saying that you have to have a desire to be a magician to perform magic tricks. all swooning over the shitty cover band up on stage.penguinmagic. Think Jessie's Girl.tsbmag. which will allow them to charge more money for their appearances. You're a fun social guy though. If the band doesn't seem to be and purchase some of the tricks that the pros use on stage.. www. During one of the set breaks you start bullshitting with the band. Most cover bands are just looking to build a following.tsbmag. in hopes that you will encourage your crew to be their new groupies. The kind of guy women want to fuck.

with your audience wanting more! The Superstar's Guide to Being Funny There are many different types of humor. There is no reason you both can't share the stage for a moment. Sure. and make you seem just that much more naturally cool. When you get on stage to kick ass with the band… it is should come as total shock… which will amplify the effect. Best of all… you leave the social encounter on a high note. It is important to master the one that comes most naturally to you. some people will scream for you to play another song. Why not blow them away with something really good? Most people study for years to get really good at the guitar." You'll come off as modest. When the party rolls around feel free to strum away. But you don't have to get really good. you best rock the house. The first criterion for this is that you have a decent voice and a good sense of rhythm. Just find one of your more talented friends or family members to teach you the song. Practice it often. Anybody with a little patience can spend a few days perfecting one song on the guitar or piano. Practice in front of a mirror.Social Superstar want to be social superstars too. 69 . Video tape yourself and fine tune your body language and how you carry yourself on stage. Even throw in a line like "I'd play all night… but that wouldn't be fun for anyone else. Just simply refuse… tell them you don't want to steal the thunder from the party. and record it so that you can listen and fine tune. which is a pleasant characteristic of a super star. You are not to tell anyone about your ability to sing. You just have to get really good at playing one song. This means that you have to spend a fair amount of time perfecting this one song. Sometimes parties will have stray guitars or pianos. If you get up on stage. This same idea can be applied to musical instruments as well. You also need to have a good stage presence. Make it the staple of your karaoke choices. and some party goer will wow everyone with his rendition of chop sticks from Big. Which really comes down to mastering a few chords.

Everyone and I mean everyone loves being around someone that consistently makes them laugh. Develop a character "Humor doesn't go into a character is comes out of him. Without a character. you can get laughs simply be being yourself. And often times you'll find yourself laughing before he's said anything. Because Vince Vaughn has really mastered this character. I do think that if you learn a little bit about humor. humor comes much more easily for him. He has developed the character of "smart ass. or making an observation on something he's witnessing. If you sense that the people around you don't respond to your jokes." If you think about the funniest performers most of them have at least one memorable character who makes you laugh before he even says anything… because you already know what his reaction will be. That being said. Think about the people you most enjoy spending time with… more than likely they will be the people that you laugh the most around.) The funnier you are. or there tends to be a lot of uncomfortable silences after you deliver your lines… stop! You'll have an easier time just being the cool serious guy… then the unfunny jokester. you're simply a recite of jokes. you can learn to recognize it. When he's responding to a question. While I don't think that spur of the moment jokes can be taught to someone who doesn't naturally think that way. You begin to expect a certain reaction. Humor is a polarizing thing… while being funny can make you extremely popular… trying to be funny when you're not can crush your social dreams. he just has to ask himself what would "a smart ass" say? It is important if you want to be funny that you have a character and that you stick with the character. the easier it will be to infiltrate new social circles. With it.The Best of TSBMAG. Humor cannot be forced or it's uncomfortable. A character needs a trademark or point of view that does not change. there is a lot of arguments over whether or not comedy can be taught. People hate bad comedy. and put it out at appropriate times. Let's use Vince Vaughn as an example. you can almost feel what his reaction will be before he makes it. Laughing feels good. The humor actually flows more from the 70 .COM Being funny is not a prerequisite for a social superstar (Being fun to be around is though." When you're watching one of his movies or listening to him speak in an interview.

No 71 . Or your characters interaction with another person. do it for a little while. Because once you "nail" the character. The character is where 90% of the humor flows from. You will probably find that they have a standard character that they have become. In order to make this concept work you must believe it and act congruently.humor will naturally flow out of it. My whole character was the arrogant-what's in it for me. It won't work if you approach it tentatively and try it… it will actually backfire. The humor comes from your characters interaction with the world. And they're not seeking approval. the straight man The guy who only wants to know what's in it for him A high maintenance chick The ultimate authority and commentator on wussy guys Imitating the women you're with Becoming devil's advocate and promoting bad behavior She needs adult supervision As you can see that by merely immersing yourself in any of these characters. Think about the funniest people you know. The ones David DeAngelo mentioned above are particularly good for dealing with women. They are actually "being" the character. then all of the funny stuff starts taking care of itself. Most funny people are not trying to be funny." I based the humor off of Vince Vaughn. the interactions. For many years I developed the character of "daddy. the humor will come with how the character is interacting with the world. You can't go into character. Or your character's interaction with your thoughts. If you can get the character down. I was able to make that character work really well. Here are some roles that David DeAngelo recommends trying out or testing… The I'm superior to you character An assumed or fake position of authority The character of the victim of her seduction The cold guy. especially if they can tell you're trying to use it to get their approval. If you keep trying to see if your audience likes it will probably backfire on you. and responses than from the jokes.Social Superstar character.jerk. get a laugh… then leave it.

Some guys need to understand things at a greater level before implementing something. But your best bet is to head out often to the local theatre or club and watch some standup comedy live. But they can teach you the underlying principles of what makes people laugh. but a social superstar needs to transcend a type. For instance. because people love to classify people into types. and you'll begin thinking like him. and how people react to them. allowing funny sarcastic lines to flow out of you. Louie CK. exhibiting only one facet: the alpha jock." Best recourses to learn humor Watching standup comedy. you have to know fundamental people skills so that you are "liked. that’s a good start for a character.The Best of TSBMAG. and a whole lot of excess cash? Well. This 6 CD set will leave you with more material than you can begin to use. or playing in a blues band on weekends. This allows you to observe the reactions of those around you. Cocky comedy is the best type of humor for attracting women.COM matter what character you choose. It lets you observe the power of delivery and timing. If you're one of those guys pick up the book "Comedy Writing Secrets. Have Contradictory Character Traits No one is less compelling than a person in life who acts like a million other characters you’ve encountered. I'm not a firm believer that books can teach you how to be funny. Some of the comedians you might want to study are Bill Burr. And they’ll likely try to push you along into one. 72 . Pay attention to his delivery. the tortured musician. If this is your type… maybe you can make yourself interesting by doing volunteer work with the humane society. Learn to see the world through his eyes." Cocky Comedy Course: David DeAngelo's cocky comedy course is a brilliant way to learn the art of cocky comedy. It is easy to fall into this trap when building an image. I've found that watching Vince Vaughn movies really helped me develop my sarcastic sense of humor. Read Books. Also pay attention to the connections he makes. the brainiac.are you picturing formal suits and furrowed forehead? Long hours. the well situated power investment banker. lots of technical gadgets like a Blackberry. Watching Movies.

The alpha male fucked a guy. not be spotting contrasts like stop signs along the road. Your observer should experience the tension. And that feeling is invigorating. The three dimensional ones. The best contrasts are so seamlessly sewn with your characterization that they’re not easy to spot. A fascinating element of human nature is that we all possess contrasting traits. He does this by leading his target in one direction. This means the nice guy admits he got rough with his last girlfriend. There is nothing in life that kills interest more than predictability. letting the target feel like they have him all figured out. And there is nothing in life that peaks interest more than a swerve just when we thought we had something or someone all figured out. each of our bundles distinctively different from anyone else’s. They slowly reveal things about themselves that keep us wondering what we will find out next. television. not a type but a real person. A great seducer does the same thing. The innocent girl had sex with a stranger. People love being swerved when they least expect it. or fact about themselves that is completely contradictory to the image they have put forward thus far. our experiences. or books are those who possess depth. other times greatly conflicting. The dedicated business man had a thousand dollar a week coke habit. The ones that intrigue us most don’t come off as stereotypes or clichés. they seep into your being. These are all contradictions of character. ADVANCED: use with caution The Dirty Little Secret People love surprises. We all carry with us histories.Social Superstar These sorts of distinctions make you different from any other person that might fall into this type. sometimes subtle. These contrasts provide endless opportunity to make yourself more complex. 73 . and then the seducer blind sides the target with an action. They make us want to know more. And they fascinate us. The responsible teacher has fucked a hooker. explore the specific and unique details that will make you more complex. The most interesting characters in movies. To understand more. It is a completely refreshing change of pace. When you build an image. story. They make us feel as if we’ve missed something all along. and our memories.

friend’s girlfriends. He was one of the most laid back. single moms. You have to build rapport with your target. He says of all the girls he told not one stopped seeing him. She proceeded to tell everyone in arm’s length about what happened. prostitutes. They got into a fight and he hit her just once. He also happened to have a fuse that would occasionally go off. Little did he know. lesbians. But suddenly he was a little more complex. and then you drop the bomb. It makes us feel alive. Now at the right moment you have to disclose this information. And they will surrender to you for it. nor do anything other socially unacceptable behavior. He literally had girls throwing themselves at him. I was friendly with many of the girls there and talked open and honestly about my sexual experiences. By introducing danger to your target you will make them feel alive. Not many people knew this side of him. And in the end desire always wins out over reason. But in their mind they were captivated by him. I am not saying to go out and hit your girlfriend. they all though they had him figured out. He was dangerous. cousins. My friend didn’t have to do all of this because all of these girls knew him previously. How many of our fantasies involve our teachers. I told 74 . They are frowned upon. although not proud of the indecent. But the girls didn’t care. and have her end the relationship. laid back guy. So by the time the story had come out. But danger is seductive. where he would lose his temper completely. and minors? These people are taboo. I had a job in a restaurant once. He was socially unacceptable. it had just begun. His ex girlfriend learned it a year into the relationship. virtuous characteristics. easy going guys. I’m sure if you did deep enough into your past you can find something you’ve done that is a little taboo. They had known him for years as a nice. The fact that they shouldn’t do it only made them want to do it more.The Best of TSBMAG. you could ever meet. But it was enough to bruise her eye. And you wait until that point where you sense they feel they have you figured out. My friend thought is social life was over on campus. or fuck a minor. He was now taboo. They are dangerous. continues years later to tell the story of that relationship to girls he meets. I had a friend back in college. Sure when they talked about him to their friends they acted as if they disapproved of him. You have to allow them to see all of your positive. My friend. What I am saying though is don’t hide what is there.COM By nature we want what we are not supposed to have.

most of our major fears are solely based on what thoughts someone else will have about us. This is 75 . a woman sees a reflection of most of her fears and insecurities. our fear of ruining our reputation. How many stopped him. This is especially true if you are a naturally nice wholesome guy. The dirty little secret is a great way to make you more desirable to a girl. Creating a little bit of an edge for yourself will work wonders for your sex appeal. Most people are insecure. We are held back by our fear of losing our job. Appear Fearless You’re fearless. And not one of them ever even made me where a condom. then do it anyway. Live a fearless existence. You guessed it. our fear of being laughed at. How ridiculous does that sound when you really think about it? 90% of the decisions that you make are influenced by your need for friend still found it morally necessary to tell every girl he was with afterwards about the charge right before he would sleep with them for the first time. lonely or in a shitty relationship. Although the charge was bullshit. What would your personality be like if you weren’t governed by all of these fears? If you take a look at the short list of our major fears… you’ll find that not one of them is life threatening. have given up our dreams… because we are afraid of making the wrong decision. our fear of going broke. our fear of making a mistake. Most of us are working a job we hate.Social Superstar them about my love of Asian massage parlors. Did it stop me from fucking half the waitresses there? Hell no. In fact. and we’re not even afraid of the consequences of the wrong decision… We are afraid of what people will say about us… what people will think about us. Feel the fear. because bad boys provide an adrenaline rush that the average guy does not. How refreshing is it when we meet someone who isn’t controlled by these fears? Women are attracted to bad boys. If you want to stand out in a crowd. our fear of rejection. none. Most people are held back by various forms of fear. Most of our fears are completely unwarranted. Most people suffer some form of anxiety disorder. I have a friend with an assault charge on his record. In the average guy. Most fear stems from our need for approval.

and do it anyway. What was so iconic about a person like John F Kennedy was that he always appeared so cool. this might just be the hardest advice you will ever receive: You need to feel the fear. terrorism. and collective. Appearing fearless is really the objective. Most human beings go through their daily existence terrified. If you do. Chances are you probably suffer from quite a few of those fears yourself. A Superstar does not confine himself to these fears. cold calling. The bad boy makes her forget all about her fears and insecurities. airplanes… and the list goes on. I am going to repeat a challenge that I laid out to you during our 31 Days to Better Game series last July. relationships. What is a fearless existence? A fearless existence is one that is not governed by the illogical fears that most people hang onto their entire life. While it may seem difficult to "be fearless" it is not nearly as difficult to appear fearless. But the fact is. confrontation. poverty. Because they can sit and talk and wallow in their fears and insecurities together. Some people are terrified of death. the heroes. some people are scared of social gatherings. no matter what the situation was.The Best of TSBMAG. natural disasters.9% of the situations you enter into. he never showed eve one ounce of fear. and the superstars of this world… overcome their fears in the face of the public. no one is inherently fearless. or bedding Marilyn Monroe. heights. He realizes that short of death or serious injury… life goes on after 99. He takes her into his fearless existence.COM why the average guy becomes her friend. Whether the president was fending off missile crisis. depriving themselves of true happiness. They find these characters exhilarating because they can't figure out how they can be so fearless. The difference is that the bad boys. 76 . calm. fighting for civil rights. the ocean. cold approaching. People like their heroes and superstars to possess the traits and characteristics they most wish they had themselves. public speaking.

say what you feel like saying. Do you want to call out of work and go the beach? Do it! Do you want to tell the counter girl at the bank that she’s sexy as hell? Do it! Do you want to finally change the style of your haircut? Jump out a plane? Get a tattoo? Have sex with a stranger? Do whatever the fuck you want! Whenever the fuck you want! Do this for just 2 days and experience the thrill of being fearless. Just for the next two days. and the less in control. the more common you appear. the more you say. You get my point. If you have a fear of flying… parachute out of an airplane. They'll go home trying to figure out what happened in the conversation. approach who you feel like approaching. Say Less Than Necessary The 4th Law of Power states: When you are trying to impress people with words. and the more time they spend pondering. the more likely you are to say something foolish. You can often gain the control in a conversation by merely giving short answers and long pauses…simply because it will put the other person on the defensive. As long as you put up a guard by carefully controlling what you reveal. or whatever other insignificant. and sphinxlike. After the two days you can go back to worrying about what people think. the more interesting you will appear. or how you appear. and they'll quickly try to fill the silence by nervously jumping in with comments that reveal valuable information about them and their weaknesses. open-ended. Even if you are saying something banal. An extremely effective way to break through your fears is to tackle a really big one immediately. trivial reason is holding you back. tell someone who has pissed you off to “fuck off. Powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. 77 .Social Superstar Live the next two days of your life completely fearless. The more you say. they will continue to try to interpret and explain you.” do exactly what you want to do. They find it necessary to know what you are thinking. Human beings are curious creatures. If you have a fear of public speaking… go to a Toastmaster's meeting and give a five minute speech to a group of strangers. it will seem original if you make it vague.

and carefully choosing your words. I've long figured out that the less you say to a girl. or not out for love… but the truth is. And far from interesting. The more time she spends trying to figure you out.The Best of TSBMAG. the more value she's invested in you. Once words are out. If you don't make it a habit of controlling the words that come out of your mouth. If you have a low tolerance for alcohol. you may be tempted to blurt out "I love you. the consequences will linger on long after the pleasure has subsided. Revealing too much not only serves to diminish the interest people have in you. but it can also be dangerous for placing yourself into a corner later on. Do not take this as an excuse to be shy or introverted. Once she knows how deeply you feel… the interest begins to diminish. Yes. This means you also must learn to handle your temper under pressure or when angry. 78 . Shy people like to think of themselves as noble… but in fact they are the most self indulgent people there are. I know because I used to be one. The social superstar lives on his own terms and knows exactly what he wants out of life. Shyness is not interesting. I've been accused of being heartless. you will wind up with a habit of letting your mouth write checks you can't cash. As much satisfaction you might get from an uncontrolled outburst. there is a difference from being shy. In fact. you cannot take them back. If you want to be a social superstar you must not let others goad you into saying something that you will come to regret." but you've just given away your greatest bargaining tool. or something that could be used against you. the more interesting you appear to her. as everything you've worked for could be ruined by one night of diarrhea of the mouth. This simple concept intrigues people. Know Where You're Going Most people wander through life aimlessly. They can't believe that he actually has it all figured out. They look for other people to guide them and show them direction.COM Saying less in a conversation also helps you avoid saying something that will make you look foolish. This is especially important when you are out drinking. be sure to watch your consumption. This also relates to a lot of the advice I give out regarding expressing your feelings toward a girl. I used to spend way too much time thinking about what other people were thinking about me. shyness is a sign of insecurity. Not the social superstar. I always recommend saying the bare minimum. This is not noble… it is vain and reeks of self centeredness. In the heat of the moment.

where you want to go?" This typical answer must not ever slip out the social superstar's mouth. They're just not cool enough to notice. right? Even if the place is completely dead… he must know something special about if that the rest of us don't if he is hanging out there. When asked what bar. appear to have an inner knowing guiding your actions. If he is there… then IT IS the coolest place you could possibly be. Think about it. you're there right? And you're the most interesting person these people know. If you claim that it is going to be a great time… make it a great time. If you've chosen join the fire department. or movie they want to go to.Social Superstar If you want to capture people's attention. Maybe this quiet hole. restaurant. The social superstar always knows where he wants to go. or picking a career. If you walked into a bar and Brad Pitt was chilling there you would automatically assume that you found the happening spot. is must be cool. Could you ask for anything better?" People like to have other people make up their mind for them. After all. This is one of the reasons we are fascinated by athletes. Once you decide where you're headed… do not second guess -the -wall bar does have some special quality. Each and every one of your actions should appear to be done completely by your own accord. It is difficult for the common person to comprehend that a human being as dedicated his whole life to a sport... It applies to everyday situations. Instead of complaining that no one is there. That is the mentality you need to have. "I don't know. they need you to point it out. be completely confident with your decision and act as if that was the ONLY logical decision you could have made based on your belief system. Always seem one hundred percent confident in your choice of what you're doing with you leisure time. People are amazed by people who live with a sense of purpose. If you're convincing enough they'll begin to feel that you're right. and is always confident in his decision. If he is there. or suggesting other places… try saying something like "This is exactly what I needed tonight. This idea of "knowing where you're going" doesn't just apply to choosing a major in college. If you're at a bar and its pretty empty. most people will reply. a nice quiet place to chill with some cool peeps. 79 . Don't be like the masses seeking approval before they do anything.

and persistent… you don't want to inspire too much envy from people. And he would always talk up his experiences to other people later on. Certain people have a way of making you feel small through their brilliance. passionate. Don' hate yourself for it. Although on the outside we praised him. 80 . While you want to be interesting. Do not be that person. You can avoid being this guy by not talking too much about your accomplishments. They will try to create situations in which you falter. we absolutely hate feeling inferior to someone. Even if you are great at something… it is not always necessary to display your talents.COM I had a friend in college who was the master of this. success. or victory… it tends to create immense envy amongst your former peers. If you begin to inspire too much envy in people they will subconsciously want to ruin you. You don't want to make the people around you feel mediocre. He just couldn't seem to do wrong. No matter what situation you were in with him you couldn't help but enjoy yourself. motivated. In a later chapter. we talk about the time and the place to "be excellent. After awhile we even found our self "accidently" saying things that might get him in trouble. Sometimes that is not enough though. But you want to avoid being the guy who creates those feelings in people.The Best of TSBMAG. Even if you and him just sat in a bar drinking alone… when asked the next day he would be like "me and Bobby just had this really cool night bullshitting for hours in this hole in the wall bar… we got hammered and shared some hilarious stories." Do you see where I'm going? Never appear too perfect As humans. Your rise to the top must seem gradual and expected." It is also important as you make your climb to social superstar that you don't make a sudden improvement in fortune. Sometimes you have to hide some of your skills in certain situations. When someone gets an unexpected promotion. We've all had that friend who was almost too perfect. You were human. He would talk up the occasion and make you truly feel that he was genuinely pleased to be hanging with you no matter where you were or what you were doing. and other people absolutely adored him. secretly we were jealous and almost wanted him to slip up.

3. Lead by Example It’s easy for anyone to tell someone how cool they are… You need to show them. instead of telling Joe he’s in charge of renting out the hotel and buying the beer… Tell him you trust him to find the right guy to rent the hotel and buy the beer. Pump up everyone in the group… get everyone to succeed. not Responsibility No one wants to be told what to do… but everyone loves to tell other people what to do. Someone always will.Social Superstar Other tips for being cool 1. Create a Winning Group Culture Why is Derek Jeter adored… and Arod hated? Because Jeter is seen as a leader who looks out for his team’s best interest… and Arod is seen as a self serving asshole. 2. You’ve got to pinpoint who that guy is as quickly as possible and be prepared for the moment he turns against you. 5. Joe will never let you down. If you’re planning out Prom Weekend. Delegate Authority. It is crucial that you’re 81 . Don’t ever talk about how many girls you can pull… just pull them. When you’ve been assigned the role of leader… it’s easy to take advantage of the people below you… but that will ultimately lead to them losing respect for you. If you’re going to be the leader of a group… it should be a group that wins. Don’t Avoid the Risk Why was Braveheart so fucking cool? Because even though his legend would have been sealed had he never stepped foot on another battlefield… he went out there with his men each and every time. Don’t lecture… LEAD. Have you noticed how in the show Entourage. If you and your buddies find yourself at a college party… be the guy who immediately fits in. People can only suppress jealousy and envy for so long before it explodes. EVER. If you’re on the football team and everyone else on the team is too hungover for Saturday’s game… be the guy still scoring the touchdowns… because you switched to water midway through the night. Know Your Competition Someone is always aiming for your top spot. Vinnie Chase wants to do everything in his power to make his friends successful too? 4.

orgies (yes I will tell this story one day) and countless one night stands. and openness to admit explicit details of my life without blinking an eye. I also found these people incredible tame for my taste. random games of truth or dare. I had been working in a restaurant for about a year. I became almost a guru to them. I remember a few years back. and a girlfriend that was already occupying most of my time. and better yet. after graduating college. Most people. I didn't socialize much with this group as I had a huge scene at college. Well. This is something that I've always been extremely good at. know how to use their sexuality as a key ingredient to their rise in stardom. I brought my frank sex talk with me. and romance novels. try to suppress their sexual needs and desires. This leads to a population of people who hunger for their fix of sexuality through pornography. soon they are opening up to me with their explicit thoughts. hidden affairs. Which gave me an unbelievable amount of power. Soon this tame crowd was openly discussing the use of vibrators. The Taboo and getting people comfortable talking about sex The biggest social superstars. makes us feel comfortable with our sexuality is a refreshing change of pace.The Best of TSBMAG. I found myself spending more time with these people. At my command I would have girls hooking up with each other. by nature. 82 . the individual who his comfortable. threesomes. While people are usually taken back at first. and an entire other lot of topics that had previously been unheard of to discuss. and simultaneously getting dumped by my girlfriend.COM ready for that explosion. They looked to me to tell them was alright to discuss and admit to. For the first year working there. politicians like Bill Clinton and John F Kennedy. For this reason. and we begin to crave this person's presence. explicit chat rooms. so I tended to naturally talk about it. When it happens… sit back and smile. Very few people give them this opportunity so it automatically puts you in an advantageous position. knowing that you’ve already covered all your bases. I've never viewed sex as something dirty or to be ashamed of.

This is an art form. And not something that you should assume you have the skills to do right off the bat. you create an environment where everyone feels free to indulge in it. On many occasions I would sleep with more than one girl in a night… with both of them well aware of what was going on. You don't want to come off as the horny college guy who can't stop talking about sex.Social Superstar By creating an environment where everyone was able to let their guard down and feel confident expressing their desires. 83 . You have to be comfortable talking about it because it is such a natural part of your life that you would not be able to understand otherwise. There were no games behind it anymore. as that will only label you a dirty hippie. This is similar to the movement that went on in the 1960's with the hippies. Although I don't suggest taking the "free love" approach. Almost as if you're more evolved towards it then others. You need to come off as having a maturity towards sex beyond your years. you will wind up looking like a sex crazed pervert. sex became just another every day activity. By creating an environment where sex is not a taboo subject. If done wrongly.

This is why it is necessary to use specific psychological techniques that will mentally bind them to sticking with you. The following section will teach you exactly how to get people to like you.The Best of TSBMAG. But a crucial element to becoming a social superstar is to be liked and adored. Your Plan: 84 . This weapon simply states that human beings feel a mental obligation to repay favors done for them. The second step in building a fan base is to get them to commit to the idea of following your lead.COM Chapter 7: Cultivate a fan base (commitment + liking + reciprocation) Your Objective: The objective of the following chapter is to teach you how to develop a legion of people who worship you. The previous chapters have given you the tools necessary to be the type of guy who people want to be around. Once someone decides that they like you it will be much easier to use the other weapons of persuasion and influence on them. People's attention's spans often waiver. liking. If you want to have people following you it is important that you first get them to like you. The third weapon of influence you must use to build your fan base is the weapon of reciprocation. This is perhaps the most powerful of all the weapons. Your communication skills need to be honed to near perfection. In the following section I am going to show you how use the power of reciprocation to get legions of people looking for ways to help you achieve superstardom. and reciprocation. They quickly get sucked back into their own day to day existence. The three most important weapons of persuasion and influence for building a fan base are commitment.

Part Time Jobs Most romances don’t occur between two people who meet at a bar or club. But I also understand that there are some people reading this who will need some guidance into how to go about finding the groups of people that they want to hang out with. and live a more exciting and rewarding life than 98% of the population. 85 . It’s a fact of life. When you’re spending 4 to 8 hours a day with the same group of people you tend to get close to them. How to Get Involved in Scenes Most of this book was written with the presumption that you already have a social scene that you can climb to the top of and command. earn more money. It makes sense. The majority of romances occur in the workplace. These three weapons of influence (liking. You also tend to start picturing them naked. If you follow the communication techniques laid out throughout the rest of this section you will make more friends. date more women. reciprocation.Social Superstar This next section will get you further in life than any of the previous sections. In this short section I want to list some more ways find people with common interests. Even if you currently have a social scene that you are active in I believe it is important that you know how to find new scenes when the time comes. and commitment) are so powerful that if you can master them the world will be handed to you on a silver spoon. It is also important to be a member of several social scenes because it allows you to play them against each other for jealousy effect. And b y dividing your time between several scenes the "scarcity" effect will multiply. as will your "social proof." In the previous section on "hobbies" I gave you some tips for finding way to immerse yourself into new hobbies.

COM I learned this lesson my junior year of high school when I took a job at Shop Right. And I mean everyone… from the 16 year old cashiers to the 55 year old Seafood Dept. Remember these jobs not only open you up to meeting co-workers and customers… but you also get introduced into the social scenes of all the friends you make at your new job. The girls that will work there will more than likely be the hipster intelligent type. These are jobs for those of you still in college. I've put together a list of some of the best jobs to meet women at.The Best of TSBMAG. A tanning salon is best for someone with a fairly good level of game. You want to work in a salon that has at least 5-10 other people working there. All the customers will be girls as well.close and personal time with any cute chick working there. or those of you just looking to supplement your income with a second job. This means you will have a chance to build rapport over time. those of you still waiting to find your life calling.If you are going to get a job in a tanning salon you want to make sure it is one of the bigger chains with lots of beds. Young girls. The 5 Best Part Time Jobs for Meeting Women Tanning Salon. Chances are they will all be girls. And most of the customers will be repeat customers coming in weekly.Barnes and Noble is best for the guy who genuinely likes to read and discuss books. The benefit is that most likely it will be a small staff of 2 or 3 people working. This means you will have up. I wasn’t working there for more than two weeks before I realized that the employees looked at the place like it was a giant night club. Barnes and Noble. These girls may seem kind of nerdy… but they are wild in bed. But once you graduate high school the quality of girls your age working in a supermarket will greatly diminish. Everyone was hooking up. managers. If you’re in high school I would probably recommend a job in a supermarket for meeting women. There won’t be as many co-workers to choose from. and you will only have a minute or two to interact with customers each time they come in. There will be many female customers 86 .

You’re game doesn’t have to be good to work the restaurant scene. 87 . If you establish yourself as the fun party guy you’ll soon be adored by all the Just Graduated High School Hotts. single moms. And it is perfect for you.Can you say social scene in a box? That is what waiting tables is. to enjoy the fruits of your labor. If at all possible go for a position in the cafe.This job is for those of you under twenty one. Barnes and Noble won’t offer as many hotties working there… but you will have a great opportunity to interact with those who do. If you’re half way social and present your best self… you’ll get laid. If you’re working there for awhile you’ll become aware of the girls that work in Hollister a few stores down… the girls who work the counters in the food court… and the girls selling bra and panties in Victoria Secret. You’ll work with a mix of college hotties. Hotties with a lot of 19 year old friends. The only drawback of a watering job is that there is very little chance of scoring with customers. The customer base will largely be young girls. Retail Store in a Mall. Get a job at chain restaurant like Fridays or Houlihans and you will instantly be engulfed in a social scene of 10-20 other likeminded college students looking to get paid. and get laid. get drunk. It’s an instant social scene. And I ask… Is there a better age group to be adored by? I think not. What makes waiting tables better than the other three jobs on this list? Alcohol. Your game needs to be good… but not great. The mall is a Mecca of female talent. The best part of waiting tables is that it is almost customary to have a drink with your co-workers when your shift ends… and we all know… one drinks turns into three or four. The cafe will offer the best opportunity for flirting with customers.Social Superstar roaming the store… but it will be hard to spend a good amount of time hitting on them without pissing off your manager. and the barely legal high school hostesses. A lot. If you get a job in a store like The Gap you are bound to be working with adorable little 19 year old hotties. Not only will your store have hotties employed in it… but so will every other store in the mall. Waiting Tables in a Restaurant.

8.COM Bartending in a Hip Bar. You will be raking in the cash. 2. 10. easy. The first day you show up at any of these events start talking to people. The longer you wait to break the ice… the harder it will get. The trick to making friends at these kinds of things is to start right away. You will have your pick of the customers. 3. 21 Ways to Expand Your Social Scene 1. But that’s part of the power in achieving it. What makes bartending so great is that your co-workers and clientele are likely to be just the kind of girls you’re looking for… hot. 6. and they drink! It’s not easy to land a good bartending job at a cool place. Don’t start with the intention of making new friends or finding a girlfriend… just make friendly conversation. 7.meetup. 4. Point blank… bartending is a power job. Don’t ask me why… but bartenders rank up there with cops for scoring the most ass.” Other Ways to Expand Your Social Scene I just wanted to give you a quick list of ways you can immediately expand you social scene.This is the Pinnacle of part time jobs.The Best of TSBMAG. Join the Toastmasters Take dancing lessons Join a volunteer organization . 88 Join a young professionals organization Take a yoga or meditation class Get a part time job waiting tables Join a bowling league Join a volley ball league Attend alumni events at your previous college Attend a weekly class at your gym Check out the various clubs at www. 11. You get the best of all worlds. 9. You will be banging your co-workers. Of course everything on this list requires you to be social and open to meeting people. Working as a bartender in a hip place says “I know important people.

Teach a class on a subject you love (art. In addition to this list. Whatever your passion is find a way to immerse yourself with people who share your interest 16. Use Myspace and Facebook to network (as opposed to hit on girls) 13.Social Superstar 12. The key to this is to find activities that truly interest you and inspire you. guitar) 14. Being around people that share your interests will not only make new friends available to you… new potential girlfriends… but it will also help you grow as a person and get you closer to achieving your dreams. classes. Revive the old band and start looking for gigs at local bars 15. Join a softball league 17. seminars 21. When you combine these 13 characteristics with the specific techniques I am going to lay out in the rest of the section you will have the blueprint for building a fan base. computers. This list contains 13 characteristics of a likeable person. How to be liked I want to start this section off with a basic list. that you should copy on a piece of paper and keep this list in your wallet along with your list of the six weapons of influence. get a part time internship in a field you love (even if it's for free) 20. If you implement all 13 of these characteristics to your daily life you will find that people will instantly want to be around you more. 89 . photography. written by Sebastian Drake. I highly recommend that you read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. Help with a political campaign (perfect timing) 19. GET OUT OF YOUR HOUSE Those are just some of the many ways you can immediately begin to meet new people and expand your social scene. Attend any networking event your job puts on (and network) 18. Scour the computer for local events.

COM 13 Characteristics of likeable People 1. Not talking too much . almost hypnotic. Likable people and high status people do not talk too much. and you both become quite important to each other. Instead they encourage others to talk and to open up. 5. Sometimes you will not feel in the mood to smile -however. give them a high five. 3. If you want to change one thing to come across more social. and that smile puts people at ease.when you become more curious and encourage them to speak more.The Best of TSBMAG.Maintaining eye contact when you talk to someone draws them deep into conversation with you . "But that's enough about me . some "pound". Likable people are always looking to find out more about the other person.People who are at ease. Smiling shows that you're pleased to see someone which can be really flattering. smile a big smile. Touch .Closely related to the above point. Touching shows emotion and affection and brings you closer to other people. Eye contact . and encourage others to talk about what they really enjoy. confident. 2.the rest of the world slows down. Smiling . 4. People love to talk about their experiences and cool things they've done . It shows a calm confidence in what they are saying and it makes them even more engaging. This strikes a great balance between good eye contact and not staring. Humans crave physical contact with others. if you choose to smile anyway you'll still get the great results. Most people don't feel heard . and more emotion and affection can be expressed through touch than any number of words ever could. what they are doing. If you catch yourself rambling for a while. Not talking about yourself .You'll consistently see magnetic people reach out and touch others. and happy tend to smile. and what interests them the most. A quick tip: Right eye to right eye.what about you?" 90 . Look from your right eye to the right eye of the person you're talking to. a playful punch on the arm or a big hug.likable people know this.Likable people typically are more curious to get to know other people and don't talk about themselves as much. Next time someone does or says something you really like. an easy way to adjust is to say. they'll actually like you more.

Likable people never criticize others. As crazy as it sounds. ever. people know the solutions to their own problems. If someone brings a minor problem to you. No big deal. If people aren't used to you opening up. I really appreciate that you did that. and criticizing is almost always useless). praising. If you can reach out to understand another person. Next time someone tells you something heavy that you could have a long discussion on. but doesn't explicitly ask for your help. you'll instantly form a great connection with them. People want to know that they are not alone in the world. and empowered. People universally hate criticism. and you're with them. The result is that a man trying to impress communicates that he's not impressive. and hate people that criticize them.Somewhat accomplished people want everyone to know about the accomplishments they've made. people get used to feeling empowered around you. let them know. Not trying to impress . Likable people always start off with genuine praise and appreciation before trying to give constructive feedback. that means they do not want you to tell them how to solve it. no long talk. and striving to truly understand them is powerful. If they ask what you'd do. letting them know you understand. Over 90% of the time. maybe make a quick suggestion but don't drive the point really hard. and appreciating constantly.Whenever you see anything you like in another person. you might get a funny reaction at first. 8. Once you've established that you're constantly on the lookout for great things in others. Everyone wants to be understood. They want to feel understood. "Hey. When you do mention something you really like.When someone tells you they have a problem." "I thought that was really cool how you did that." 9. 7. instead try saying just "I understand. Not trying to fix other peoples' problems . Really amazing people are much more humble and low key about what they've done. Never criticizing. try listening. keep it casual. Just. 10. The most impressive people never actively try to impress people. Showing praise and appreciation . most people do not tell others about their problems in order to get 91 . nodding. cared about." You'll be amazed at how uplifting it can make other people feel. and will only give this feedback rarely (because likable people understand that praise is a much better way to help people change than even constructive feedback. for any reason .Making people feel understood. Tell them you believe in them and you think they'll sort it out. Empathy .Social Superstar 6.

13. It brings people down. The most important thing that you will find is that once you implement everything you've learned in the previous section you will find it very easy to make friends.for a bonus. or accept that it's there.The Best of TSBMAG. pop culture. Eliminate negativity . pick a couple more and start implementing. The most charismatic people never "impose" that down feeling on others.COM solutions. If you don't like something. activist groups you disagree with.Everyone feels down from time to time. the more you gain control over your life. You probably already do a lot of those .Never mentioning anything you don't like. I've also recommended reading How to Win Friends and Influence People. and long term improvements down the line. You'll see quick improvements right away. 11. Being positive is really good. they want understanding. empathy. and so on. The steps outlined can be used just as effective for making friends with other men who will make suitable wingman. Never complain . 12. and reassurance. Never impose weakness on others . The more you stay composed. not complaining about the government. Not talking about things you dislike is even more important. fashions you think are silly. 92 . or just good buddies. there's no reason to complain. and they feel they can rely on you. Especially never being down on culture-wide things outside of your direct control: So. and refrain from showing being fazed or flustered. they're a fort of strength for people around them. When you realize that. Making Friends In the section below I am going to outline some steps for acquiring female friends. People start to respect you more. you have two choices: Take action to fix it. others feel slightly less inclined to be around them. instead.When people complain. People are very strong and quite good at solving their own problems when believed in.

you friendship is never at an even playing field. I would occasionally sleep with them too. But by this point I was a social superstar so it was acceptable. 93 . we are trained to want every pretty girl we come across. Why do club owners. But the fact is. simply because I could. In order to do this you must eliminate all desire you have to sleep with her. I burned a lot of good bridges doing this. bartenders seem to always have power? It is because these guys are always surrounded by women. Because they were likely aware of your true intention. This is why it makes much more sense for you to put girls in the friend zone. The girl will always hold a subconscious power over you. This is because the man who controls the women… is the man everyone wants to be around. we can't have them all. as my skills progressed. most adored woman in that scene. And you will more than likely forever pine for your opportunity to finally bust through the barrier of friendship. Women often make the man. When you get put in the friend zone your intention wasn't to be friends. As guys. Women know that hanging around these guys equals excitement and privilege. Think about it. For a long time I made the mistake of sleeping with cool girls. and getting put in the friend zone. Sure.Social Superstar The Art of Acquiring Female Friends The importance acquiring female friends has been stressed many times on TSB and throughout the dating advice industry by nearly every coach. knowing full well that I had no interest in taking the relationship any further. Later. actors. The social superstar knows that the easiest way to climb to the top of the food chain is by having female cheerleaders cheering on your every should make an effort to befriend the hottest. Whatever social scene you are currently involved in. Guys new to studying dating and pick up will probably find this advice contradictory to the never ending battle against getting placed in the friend zone. But there is an important distinction between making friends with girls. DJs. Men know that hanging around these guys will lead to more girls in their lives. Your intention was to date or sleep with them. I instead made friends with these girls.

Instead you will be giving her appreciation. but to make her feel important. For instance. interesting. The easiest way to make someone feel important is to really pay attention when they are talking to you. Instead of waiting for your chance to talk. did you see (insert movie) cause I always trust your opinion on what's good. Remember details of her life." She won't have expected you to remember that minute detail of a previous conversation… and when you do she'll really appreciate you. You aren't going to give them gifts.say something like. take mental notes of what she is telling you. Your goal is not to flatter her. compliments. Appreciation simply means recognizes the unique qualities in her." By doing this you're demonstrating that you see her as having an expertise in something other 94 . She is merely a pawn in your chess game. The social proof she provides you with gives you the ability to become a superstar. understood.if she's complaining about her current job.COM You must accept right now that you will never sleep with her. Once you've acquired this information."Well.The Best of TSBMAG. The most important thing to do if you want to win someone over is to give them something. play to that. 2. This way you can discover what her true interests and passions can use it to win her over. This social proof gives you the ability to befriend her. No one can resist these things. if you can tell that she believes she is very knowledgeable about movies… say something like "hey. and special. Once you figure out how she views herself. and adventurous guy. they always need fireman. Appreciation mixed with adventure and excitement. Confidential tricks for winning her over 1. if during a conversation she makes a joke about having wanted to be a fireman when she was little. making friends with her should be relatively easy. For instance. If you've followed the guidelines throughout this manuscript than you've already established yourself as a funny. Don't be obnoxious or creepy about it. Once you've completely eliminated your desire to sleep with this woman. You've already developed a strong degree of social proof. These things devalue you. or favors. in a conversation down the road. but by paying attention you'll be able to ask her things later.

com/2006/12/04/podcast-1/ Communication The way in which you communicate with them men and women in your social group will go along way toward building your fan base. And make her have a good time doing it.Social Superstar than looking pretty.she'll become addicted to the thrill you provide. Get her to experience something completely outside her comfort zone.but don't go out of your way to hide them. Most guys put on such a front around her. If the two of you are involved in a social scene together you can pick another person in that scene and share a bit of information with her about that person. that the realness you display around her will be refreshing. but play it up very well. began to make yourself more interesting. Don't stress your faults or blunders.but tell her she can't tell anyone. For instance. Make it ridiculously unbelievable. I got the entire staff. She'll always be questioning you about whether or not it's true. after a work Christmas party one year. and give off a 10 second impression of a superstar. Completely drop your guard around her. The communication skills you are learning in this chapter do not work nearly as well if you are looked at as having lesser status.greatseducer. Don't hesitate to say anything you would around your male friends.and soon the mere sight of this person will make her wish you were around to share in the humor. If you can get her to do something outside of her comfort zone. Be 100% completely yourself. This means that the communication skills you are learning in this section are dependent on you having already created your image. 5. or beta qualities. 4. and associate the rewarding and exciting feeling with you. 95 . It is important that you've already completed the above listed steps so that you will be accepted by your peers as being a "higher status" head over to a strip bar with me. Everything you have learned in this manuscript will work in synergy. Develop an inside joke with her. taken on the attitude of the winner.women included. Now whenever this person is around. 3. For more information on acquiring female friends listen to our podcast on the subject at: http://www. Most girls want to believe deep down inside that they're more than their looks. make inside references to that little piece of knowledge.

96 . Even though it is an unconscious feeling.and her choosing to compliment you makes you feel special. When a man "lower" than you on the social ladder compliments you or does you a favor you feel no special bond toward him. Now that was an extreme example because of the examples of the two different classes of women. It is a simple concept. That bond is the feeling of the need to reciprocate. whether it is a compliment. You remember that compliment. When someone gives us something of value. On the other hand. people are greatly moved by admiration that comes to them from someone they view as being "higher status" then them. But this theory holds just as true when applied to men who you view as having different social value. People will assume that he is being nice because he wants something from you.COM A lower status man who follows the principles laid out in a book like "How to Win Friends and Influence People" will come across as insincere or "try hard". And you secretly resent the fat girl for thinking that she has a chance with you simply by complimenting you. This is because a lower status male will be viewed as having an agenda. or a gift… we do not feel a sense of completion until we reciprocate the gesture. A woman will say to another woman "I really like you earrings" and immediately the other woman will say "Thank you.The Best of TSBMAG. This is why you will so often hear two people complimenting each other within seconds. a favor. A beautiful woman can pick and choose who she compliments. the need to unburden one's self of it is so powerful that a person often acts immediately to restore the balance. But when a man who you view as being "higher" up the social ladder than you does you a favor or compliments you there an unconscious bond that you feel toward him. You don't accept the praise as genuine.and more importantly. People do not appreciate or respect praise or admiration that comes from someone they view as being "lower" than feel a sense of "liking" toward that beautiful woman. If a fat girl tells you that she likes your new haircut you immediately assume that she has an agenda behind it. The law of reciprocation is the most powerful of all the weapons of influence. But if a woman of exceptional beauty tells you that she likes your new haircut you begin to feel proud of the haircut. I love the shirt you're wearing." People can't have the weight of reciprocation hanging over them.

If a site like Maxim mentions us just once and provides one link to us. We are also greatly aware of the hierarchy and where we fit in within in. Playboy.they will get back what they gave exponentially. I want to briefly show an example of how this works in the business or marketing world. websites. But the level in which we reciprocate back is tenfold when we feel the person who gave us something is of higher value to us. and authors.because we recognize that imbalance between our two spheres of influence. providing four or five links to their site. and influence. We recognize that as being fairly new TSB is below sites magazines like Maxim.we will go out of our way to mention them four or five times. The Law of Reciprocation and Higher Status This is the fundamental concept that you need to build your fan base: When a higher status person gives something away to a lower status person. We feel an immediate sense of liking toward that site for recognizing our unique talent. we are above thousands of other websites and blogs. The sense of reciprocation is felt in any situation in which one person provides another with a favor. The same rule applies just as strongly to role reciprocation plays in the social hierarchy. When TSB is mentioned or receives a link from a site like Maxim or Playboy we recognize that a genuine favor was produced.but to return it in a much greater magnitude than we originally gave it in. prestige. The hierarchy in our world is based on reputation. or gift. This world includes all of the other men's online magazines. or Men's Health. 97 . Before I explain the ways in which to apply this in the social world. blogs.Social Superstar While it is only possible to gain the feeling of "liking" when a higher status person compliments you or does you a favor. number of visitors. We also feel a strong sense of the need to reciprocate.we will get back what we've given exponentially. As editor of TSB Magazine I recognize the "world" in which we reside in. The weight of reciprocation will be so strong on their back that they will feel the need to not only return the favor. compliment. If we (the higher status) person give something to anyone that is lower status then us. Here is the kicker…. However.

you want them to feel like they are a part of it. Well. This is what will cause them to put some investment into it.The Best of TSBMAG. taboo subjects… ultimately your goal is to bring these qualities and characteristics out from those around you. and therefore.greatseducer. to indulge in the taboo. fearless.the easiest way for you to acquire fun and excitement is to provide it to others. Once you have established a little bit of social currency. This podcast includes many ways in which you can add excitement to the lives of those around you. This is what will make them commit to seeing you achieve social superstardom. They will feel that they are a part of it. humor. are along for the The secret to being fun to be around The biggest thing you can do yourself be fun to be around is to make the people you're with feel like they are fun to be around. http://www. Although you should be introducing things like adventure. 98 . This means help those around you develop the confidence to explore their sense of humor. Be Fun to Be Around The entire reason you should even want to become a social superstar is for the fun and excitement it will provide you. We did a podcast called "Being the badboy with women" awhile back. and adventurous. The easiest way to be fun to be around is to follow the principles laid out in chapter six. you are able to multiply that currency. and have some skills that entertain people. based on the law of reciprocation. Encourage them to take risks.COM This is the reason that some people seem to rapidly ascend to the top of the social ladder. You don't want the people around you to feel like an idle spectator in your show. talk about the taboo. and to demonstrate the skills that they have." Remember: Everything we give we will get back exponentially. This is very similar to the saying "the rich get richer. As you read through the next few sections keep this in mind as it will allow you to see the true power in what I am telling you. Some of the key ideas include: be funny.

long road trips. 16. This means organizing things like ski trips. Themed parties (toga. He is a leader who organizes the fun adventures that everyone craves. paint ball expeditions. 6. ugly sweater. The social superstar makes things happen.often they are not creative. This means that they will most likely hang out at the same couple of bars or clubs every weekend. 12. 15. 9. 4. tailgating… The events I just listed are things that pretty much everyone enjoys doing. 80's) Softball games and BBQs S & M clubs Salsa clubs Concerts w/tailgating Bowling nights Road trips Ski trips Beach houses Happy hours (particularly a weekly event like Taco Tuesdays) Paintballing Sky diving excursions Hookah bars Volleyball night (some bars have courts) Strip clubs (bringing women with you) Fairs 99 . 10. 11. Here is a list of things that you should try to organize: 1. 7. Winning the higher status people over requires the skill of becoming the go-to guy for a good time. Although most high status people are fun to be around. concerts. 3. Or a lower status person tries to set them up. 2. 5. 13. nights out at unique places like S& M clubs.but no one follows along. salsa dancing. These sorts of events are what will make you unique and separate you from the other higher status males in the group who are content to spend another night at the local pub. The problem is that no one takes the initiative to set them up. 14. 8. You being the high status male must initiate these sorts of things and get people to follow along with you.Social Superstar Be Someone Who Makes Things Happen Lower status people will always be won over much more easily than the higher status people in your social circle. themed parties.

You should not only be listening. You need to use the information wisely and subtly down the road. And days or months later. but never take the initiative to set up. Show genuine interest in other people's lives. Because of this very few people actually pay attention to the people around them. Most people barely listen to the people that they are in conversation with. but you should be remembering the details of the conversation. when she was complaining about her current job. If you are the guy introducing other people to this whole new world… they will repay you with loyalty and admiration.and be their biggest fan. you said "I'm sure there are fires you could be putting out." On the surface she probably laughed… but inside she will be flattered that you remembered such a small detail of something she told you. everyone craves attention and recognition so much it hurts them. but actually remembered obscure details of a conversation. asking a lot of questions of someone may even annoy them. and are just silently waiting for their chance to speak. Here is a trick for remembering details: 100 . You need to store specific details away for later use. The secret is to really listen when they talk to you. The secret is to continually be curious about other's lives.COM 17. There is nothing more flattering to a person than the realization that someone not only listened to them. This does not mean simply ask them a lot of questions. Monster truck derbies These are just some fun things that most people would enjoy. Most people wind up at the same bars or clubs every weekend.The Best of TSBMAG. Remember the example I gave earlier of the woman who casually told you that she wanted to be a fireman when she grew up…. And the person who supplies them with "drug" of recognition holds a very strong power over them. Get Interested in Other People I am about to tell you the secret to acquiring and keeping massive amounts of friends. Everyone is the most important person in their own life. The sad truth is. In fact. Anybody can ask a lot of questions to fill up the dead air.

When having conversations with important people you just press record. but many of my old friends and classmates show up for what is basically a yearly reunion.Social Superstar Photographic Memory If you don't already own a digital voice recorder. The night before the homecoming game everyone from the Greek system usually meets at this bar called Alexis right down the street from campus. and then tell her you'll call her. Only stalkers know every little detail about someone. But it is a pleasant surprise and a great conversation hook when you ask them about something they probably assumed you forgot. says "hello" to me. She'll wonder why you didn't write it down and assume you will forget it. you can use it to demonstrate a photographic memory. I had been out of school for seven years. Be careful not to seem too creepy by remembering too much. While I am ordering a beer this girl from a sorority I used to part with frequently. you need to go out and get one immediately. After making brief small talk. You can also use this when getting a girl's phone number. You carry the voice recorder along with you in your pocket. She was absolutely astonished I knew her name." Her jaw dropped. 101 . Other than using one as a self improvement tool when it comes to perfecting tonality and conversation skills. you can just tell her you have a photographic memory. She is a girl that I always thought was pretty cute.) These folders should be reviewed before you go out to interact with these people again. Later when you call. These people will be impressed that you were able to remember things that most people forget. but she always had a boyfriend so I never talked much to her during college. then repeat it loud enough for the recorder to pick it up. Ask for her number. she says "Do you even know my name?" I looked her straight in the eyes and said "Of course I know your name Kimberly. You can play the previous conversation and pick out important details. We spent the rest of the night talking and I arranged a date to hang out. Remember Names I went back for homecoming weekend at my old college last October. She went on to confess that she had a huge crush on me throughout college. They are useful for so many activities. Later when you go home transfer that file to your computer in a folder with their name (or better yet a code name.

Let's say that there is a guy in your social scene that is slightly below you on the social ladder. It is not a competition or a race. When you view someone as having higher status than you.the higher your value becomes. Make Other People Feel Like Superstars As you can see by everything leading up to this to openly praise them. Making other people feel like superstars is really a culmination of everything we've learned in this chapter. Just think. as badly as you want to become a social superstar. and fun people you have around you. The cooler. And when you see anyone. And more importantly – the more enjoyable your life becomes. more interesting. One night you go out with this guy and he hooks up with an attractive woman. Human beings love the sound of their own name. You need to look at them as members of your team. Remember that everything you give to others will be reciprocated back to you. And they feel flattered when people remember it. Use the photographic memory trick if you have to. I actually get tingly upon hearing a beautiful woman say it. At first I was shocked that she would have thought I didn't know her name. You always want your team to be as strong as possible. But then I realized that I too get happy when a girl I view as having higher status knows my name. But the most important part.COM I realized something that subconsciously believe that they are too important for you. You see yourself as such a blip in their reality that they probably don't even know your matter how low down the social ladder the may beaddress them by their name. This must be done in public. compliment them. The lesson to be learned: Remember everyone's name the first time you hear it.they will feel the need to give back to you twice as much as you gave to them.the secret to building your fan base is to become the fan of others. So the next step is to make these people feel like Superstars. It is obvious to you that he is proud of 102 .The Best of TSBMAG. They never get tired of hearing it. Never worry that someone else will steal your spot light. And if the people you are giving value to are lower on the social ladder than you. entertaining.most of these people will have the same desire. and give value to them.

the entire focus of what I have been talking about is how you should be giving value to others. But he can't.they will feel an uncontrollable sense of obligation to reciprocate the value.he will forever be in gratitude toward you. Before I knew. You know that he wants to brag about it. You should also make it a habit to pull people out of their comfort zone. help him to get over it. Let Other People Sell You This is the culmination of all of everything you've been doing. He will love you for it. This is because he doesn't use concrete examples for his praise. He is the coolest guy I know. There were two girls we both wanted to talk to. Help him by giving him practice. This is your chance to boost him up even further. So you do it for him. Well. You've taken interest in them and have openly praised them. By doing things like remembering people's name. Tell the story for him. This guy is the coolest guy I know. The flattery must be sincere. showing interest in them. If you know that Joe is shy around woman. And later build him up. And you've done a nice thing for him. The praise must be specific. You are a high value person. Get in the habit of being the fan of those around you. and he's making out with this cute brunette. Not only is there a sense of 103 .exponentially. He says something like "Joe is the man. Don't lecture him or try to impose "strategies" on him.make him seem even cooler than he is. and turning them into superstars. I say this because we all know that guy who is always seems incredibly fake while boosting up his friends. Bring him into situation where he will be forced to talk to women. It should be said like this: "Joe is the man. making them feel important. Not only should you acknowledge to him that you were impressed by what he did… you should brag about it for him to the other people in your social circle. and contribute to him building his self esteem. Last week the two of us were at this bar. praising them. You know that Joe is proud of what he did. Talk about how "the girl was definitely into you." Do you see how much more sincere and real it sounds when you back up praise with specific examples. now is the time in which that value is paid back to you. It took him like five minutes. Up until now.Social Superstar himself. Think about it." This sounds phony." If you can get him out of his comfort zone.he's macking both of them.

" Your entire life. This means that every tiny.especially your social life. These men and women will become an army of publicity agents for you.but it is in their best interest to do so. You are now on "their side. A month later you are at a bar. When you show up for a party random people will already know who you are. It turns out that one of his friends has the same interest in rock climbing that you do. If you praised them. wash. this idea gave rise to the notion of a butterfly flapping it's wings in one area of the world. tonight you walk into a restaurant and have dinner. You 104 .The Best of TSBMAG. If you're showing them a good time. Imagine that you spent a night partying with Brad Pitt. causing a tornado or some such weather event to occur in another remote area of the world. and repeat on this new group of people.the higher that they will be able to rise along with you. The more people talk about you the higher your value becomes. Rinse. remembering the large tip you gave him he recognizes you and introduces you to his friends. You leave your waiter a larger than normal tip. For instance. How many people do you think you would be telling that story to? Everyone you possibly could. they will be constantly talking about how much fun they had with you. View it like this. seemingly insignificant action will have a later effect on your life. If you are higher value. Because these people already know who you are they will be more likely to talk to you." This means that the stronger and more powerful you become. they will go out of their way to praise you and talk you up to everyone who will listen. They will look for every excuse to talk about "the awesome time" you had ruled by the butterfly effect. Can you see how quickly you can become a social superstar? Can you see how quickly invitations will start pouring your way from various social circles? Can you see how many opportunities will be thrown at you? The Butterfly Effect "The "Butterfly Effect" is the propensity of a system to be sensitive to initial conditions. Such systems over time become unpredictable.they will want to be associated with you. The waiter is there. It will eventually get to the point where your reputation will precede you.COM obligation to return the favor. Now imagine that Brad Pitt turned out to be a really cool guy who showed genuine interest in you. Your name will travel through many social circles.

Social Superstar befriend the guy on Facebook and set a date to go rock climbing. The day before you're about to go rock climbing you leave a comment on his Facebook page telling him "Get ready for some heavy duty climbing tomorrow!" It turns out that a girl you dated several years ago is friends with him on Facebook. She sees your comment. and befriends you. 105 . She invites you to come to a party with some of her friends. All because you left a waiter an above average tip. While at the meet and fall in love with another girl.

2005-2008 106 .The Best of TSBMAG.COM PART TWO: The Best of TSB Magazine VOL 1.

2. They are so unsure of their own opinion that they need to confirm it with the opinion of other women. The story has to indirectly reference that she was hot. Instead say. passionate. but you get the point. prostitutes. ex girl friends. If you want to fool a girl into believing any one thing about you it should be. Tell a story about you and a hot chick. Take as many pictures of yourself with hot chicks as possible. The point is to have these pictures 107 . that you are wanted by other women. Through Storytelling. I’m not a jealous person. Girls are strange creatures.Social Superstar 5 Keys to Playing the Role of Being Wanted Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 09/09/2007 If you could make a girl believe one thing about you. and intelligent? That you’re the energizer bunny in bed? If you guessed any of these things you’d be wrong for ninety nine percent of the women out there. Never say. In some of the gambits Mystery uses this plays a huge part. what do you think would most make her want to date you? That you’re rich? That you’re packing nine inches? That you’re insanely confident? That you’re talented. If they like him “I should like him too” is the thought that goes through their minds. I don’t care if these girls are friends.” You see you never said she was hot… But the girl will assume it. I wasn’t jealous. But she was like a ham when she noticed guys gawking at her. or your cousins. 1. So I’m going to give you a quick list of things you can do to achieve the perception to a girl you are interested in that you “get laid” and are in demand. “Me and my ex. co-workers. who was really hot…” That sounds like you’re trying to impress her. That example is a little over the top. To me that's just obnoxious. Through Pictures. “One of the things me and my ex would fight about was the way she responded to the attention she got from men.

If you’re already scoring hot babes this will just be things you do naturally and in turn will make you score even more babes. and be not at all phased by having to wait to see her. You can then say “Saturday would work better. And when you can’t hang out don’t give a reason. Through Unavailability. Girls by nature love to look at pictures. Texting is even better. The key to this is don’t mention the texts and don’t respond to the texts.” The girl will wonder what your type is. When you’re out with a girl. When she flips through these pictures and sees you with all these girls a message will be delivered to her brain. but she’s not my type. don’t say “she’s hot” it sort of puts you in that category of college guys who read Maxim magazine. try to set it up to have many of your friends call your cell phone or text you. These are just five things you can begin immediately to present the image to women that you are in demand. just say “a friend” 4. “She’s got sexiness.COM lying around your house or even in your car. If she says “You want to get together Friday?” Say “Fridays no good?” Don’t say why. If she asks you if you think Jessica Alba is good looking. Instead say.The Best of TSBMAG. read the text. If she asks who keeps texting. Don’t always be available to hang out. Girls will always assume its other girl’s texting you. You can pull your phone out. Through Taking Hot Girls off a Pedestal. Never talk about how “hot” another girl is. and then quietly put your phone back in your pocket without mentioning it. and if she fits it. The rich get richer my friends… 108 .” or “How about early next week” Either way she’ll assume that if you can hold off meeting her then you must be used to meeting attractive women. She won’t ask. Through Text Messages. 5. “I better keep this one before he runs off with one of these girls” 3. Just read the texts and put the phone away. Or how “hot” she is.

Read it.Social Superstar 10 Lessons for Successfully Hooking Up with Girls Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/07/2007 Fuck an intro! Let’s get right down to it. The minute you feel your gut saying its time. If you feel a vibe. The sad truth is there are a hundred guys lined up behind you to fuck this one girl. if you don’t feel it. Don’t waste another second with a dead end lead. Lead the conversation in the direction you want it to go in. 2. You know when talking to a girl if you are getting a vibe or not. Understand it. Not tomorrow. principles immediately in your life. Those are all excuses to delay. That leaves 20% for error. Apply these rules. No later. That is your way of justifying the fact that you haven’t got the balls to act on a good lead. 3. chances are she does too. A way to procrastinate. You are probably saying. Act on it quickly. I’d say that is a chance worth taking. Delay for a second. The first ten lessons apply in situations where you have yet to kiss the girl. That is your fear of failure. ‘okay I feel it. and watch the used condom wrappers pile up. not after you get a haircut. Because the more time you spend reading this shit. In grain it. or a new job. With that being said. Learn it. And remember. Unless you are a completely delusional person. Take action quickly. Intuition is priceless. Trust your gut. not next week. Do not give yourself time to second guess. If you start looking for proof you’ll start finding the opposite. The biggest mistake you can make is letting a good one slip by because you hesitated or wanted more proof that your gut feeling was right. or after you have time to plan out some advanced strategy. now what?’ If you don’t think it is the 109 . flee. Re-read it if you fuck up. I’d say on average your gut feeling is right more that 80%of the time. thought is the cheapest commodity on earth. the less fucking you’ll be doing. while the guy who took action has his dick between her legs. Because second guessing comes from thought. If you want pussy you better be ready to act on a minutes' notice. 1. IT IS TIME. Go with it. lessons. and you’ll be home again masturbating.

she will be more than willing to follow. but if you leave without kissing her you are no closer to her pussy then you were yesterday. You tell a girl she is beautiful and there will be silence. Compliment things that she can reply to. If you can get her hand in yours. If this is the case it is vital that you set the terms of your next encounter immediately. but if you are not at that point then you risk a potentially awkward moment. Those are clichés and hardly ever get you anywhere. Nothing. Rubbing her back. I know it happens. You may have had the greatest conversation in the world. Her dead aunt. Don’t ask. Kiss her already. Shit. Tell her. Make sure you keep the conversation light and flirtatious. Her current boyfriend. This is our way of warning her that it is coming. Planting seeds is for farmers my friend.COM appropriate place or moment to kiss her. Let her know. but DO NOT OVER DUE IT. If she has on a nice smelling perfume let her know that you’ve noticed. Her last relationship. 110 . If you let her start rambling on she may wind up talking about something that kills the mood. Chances are you won’t have another opportunity as perfect as you just blew. damn it. Throw compliments out there. Holding her hand. YOU WILL TALK YOURSELF RIGHT PAST THE MOMENT. I’m not talking about molester type shit. A nice trick is to grab her hand when leading her through a crowded place. Remember: THE MORE TIME THE TWO OF YOU SPEND TALKING THE HARDER IT WILL BE TO KISS HER. I’m talking about making an initial contact. Find a genuinely nice characteristic of hers and let her know you notice it. Until your lips have touched hers you have shit. I stressed this point in lesson #3 but it is well worth repeating. Before we can kiss a girl we must make use of our hands. Silence is good if you are at the point where you want to move in for the kiss. It will seem completely appropriate. Holding her hand is the key. a little longer than necessary. There are times that you really can’t kiss her right then and there. Yea. That way it is not a complete shock when we lean in for the kiss. or how pretty she is. Now make sure the conversation stays where you want it. 6. Brushing hair away from her eyes. Lead her to a better spot. If you are in a crowded place tell her to come with you some where more intimate. it creates a certain amount of intimacy. The hand is the first step. you are more than half way there. If at all possible keep holding it. Shit.The Best of TSBMAG. 5. Let her know your intentions if you must leave without kissing her. 4. If your gut was right. Don’t try to flatter her with remarks about her eyes. once you get her through the crowd. in not so many words. lead her to that place. yet.

Make up your mind quickly and stick to that decision firmly. and I’m sure most of you do to. deal with them. While you don’t want to lose her to the competition. But do not try to talk her into staying around. Once you have decided. Use your hand. Always leave with the upper hand. 10. Once you realize that nothing is going to happen tonight. Tell her that you really want to see her again. let her leave. or go for the kiss. I hate making that call. DO NOT BEG FOR IT. Don’t settle for less. WAITING FOR THE PERFECT MOMENT = ANOTHER NIGHT JERKING OFF. but know who the bitch of the bunch is and go for her 100%. Do not wait for the perfect moment to strike up a conversation. Set a date. It will kill your chances for next time. If a girl shoots one of your attempts down and you continue on it shows vast amounts of confidence. 9. Decide who the lucky lady is for the night and go for her. push the other ones out of your mind for the time being. Girls do not like the weak. There are a million girls in the world.Social Superstar that when you see her again you intend on kissing her. you also don’t want to appear desperate. and a time up. There is no perfect moment. Don’t be weak. The perfect moment does not exist. This is kind of a rehash of the other nine lessons. And I don’t know about you. Even if you are. Most of the time the girl is just weeding out the weak. That way if you fail with her. A winner figures out a way to win. and overcome them. a place. Don’t leave it up to a phone call. a loser gives up that much sooner. Hold her hand for a second or two longer than normal while saying goodbye. Follow lesson #6 while saying goodbye. you don’t give up until you have gotten in her pants or there is a painfully clear rejection. (Hopefully fucking her) Do this by stressing those warning signals I told you about. The difference between a winner and a loser is. 7. Now I’m not saying you can’t talk to other girls and use them as jealousy tools. You will spread yourself to thin if you go for more than one girl at a time. Be decisive. That is why once you have decided on the girl. hold the hand. When obstacles appear. Make plans to see her right then and there. ask for the number.she’s off the list. Those who look hungry never get fed. Overcome small obstacles. CONFIDENCE IS THE MOST ATTRACTIVE QUALITY YOU CAN DISPLAY TO HER. let it go. 111 . 8. Unfortunately you can’t fuck them all. If she has to leave. but I am sick and tired of stroking myself to sleep. Don’t act hungry.

And dreams are like thoughts. I learned these lessons the rough way. with half the sense of humor. Why? Because they require a certain amount of balls that we all have but tend to suppress. If I knew I could have her I was okay. NO MORE! I will say it again loudly. I will laugh in your face. get more pussy in a week then I did in a year. Months! I watched guys not half as good looking.The Best of TSBMAG. half the knowledge I had. you have not proven anything to anyone. Because without it you’re a dreamer. So fucking what? It is all shit. When I say rough I mean I went months in between fucks. Bad. Until you have that girl naked in your bed begging for your cock to dig inside of her. Try and tell me how you can have any girl you want on any given day. 112 . cheap and meaningless. It is easier to delay. SHOW ME THE PUSSY.COM These are the toughest lessons to master. And it hurt. As with anything in life. I took comfort in the knowledge that I knew more than they did. I was the king of content. UNTIL YOUR DICK PENETRATES HER PUSSY YOU HAVE JACK SHIT.

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Emulate a Celebrity for Instant Rapport
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/19/2007

This is simple advice. I’ve done it. And I’ve seen other people do it. And it works. It works like a charm. This is best for guys who haven’t yet developed their own personal style and unleashed their own personal inner charisma. People naturally feel most comfortable around people they know. They are also most attracted to people that they see often. This is the reason people often date someone they work with, go to school with, or share mutual friends with. You see these people all the time and they are part of your consciousness. When you see these people out you are drawn to them out of their familiarity. Because they are familiar you feel rapport with them and are attracted to them easier then someone you are seeing for the first time. Follow me so far? This all came much clearer recently in Brazil. I was in a city where I knew no one. The place is filled with beautiful women. It is relatively easy to initiate a conversation with any of the girls down there, as I am a young decent looking foreigner. What I noticed about myself is that I was drawn to the girls that reminded me of girls I knew back home. I was consistently going after the girls that resembled girls from my social circle, not just in appearance but in manner. It wasn’t a conscious decision. But in a land of unfamiliarity these girls were comfortable. They put me at ease. I felt a rapport with them which made me more attracted to them. This got me to thinking. When you’re out and you see someone who looks like someone that you know, don’t you pay a little more attention to them then the other less familiar looking faces? Most people do. It’s natural. We like familiarity. Women are the same way. I’ve found that when a woman I just met tells me that I remind her of someone she knows, she is usually more responsive to me, lets things accelerate quicker, and generally less flaky in future meetings. So the question I had was how I could create this rapport more often. And the answer was to remind women of someone they know more

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often. Since we don’t know anything about most women and the men in their lives, how can we remind them of someone they know? We have to remind them of someone that everyone knows. And who does everyone know? Celebrities! I know a few guys who naturally resemble celebrities (not necessarily traditionally good looking celebrities) and these guys have always had an easy time opening women. Most of the time the women don’t even realize that the guy looks like so and so, but they feel an instant rapport with them. This is because these guys are familiar to women. The women feel like they’ve known them for a long time. They put their guards down. So a quick way to gain instant rapport with women is to emulate a celebrity. Most of us have a celebrity that we resemble in some way. It doesn’t have to be a great looking guy. It can be Tony Soprano for all it matters. It just has to be someone that is part of national consciousness. Once you decide on someone that you physically resemble (it helps if it’s someone that other people have told you) then next step is emulate their mannerisms, their tone of voice, their gestures, facial expressions, and style of dress. I’m not talking about stalker type obsessive shit… I’m just talking about emulating someone. You can rent a few videos of the person you’ve chosen and really watch them. And practice. Practice their walk, their talk, and their mannerisms. You don’t want to make it obvious that you’re trying to look like someone. And the people that know you closely will notice the change and most likely rip on you for it... But when you go out you’ll notice a huge difference in the way you are reacted to. Girls will open up to you much easier. This doesn’t mean you don’t need the game to back it up. But it will open doors that might have otherwise been shut. Try it. See for yourself and let me know the results.


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Using an Opinion Opener to Initiate a Conversation
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/01/20089

Last night after the radio show Mike Stoute and I headed over to a local pub for a couple beers. The radio show was quite stressful as there was a shit load of technical difficulties with the transmitter… which messed the phone lines up, and hence, instead of talking to our planned guest we were forced to improvise. It left us feeling drained and just looking to unwind. The both of us already had girls we were going to be meeting later on, so our intentions were solely to chat a little and throw a few beers back. As some of you know, both Mike and I are recently single, and once again experiencing some of the things that make dating such a pain in the ass. Our conversation at the bar turned towards the girls we were going to be meeting later on in the night. Both of us had been dating these girls for a brief period of time and already beginning to experience the “what is this?” or “where is this going?” or “what should I tell my friends we are?” talk. The talk that takes the fun out of casual relationships. Mike and I were telling each other various stories of time’s we’ve been in the situation and how the different girls reacted. We were trying to come up with the “right” way to answer the dreaded “what is this?” question. Although the topic was somewhat serious, we began making a goof of it by coming up with over the top comebacks to the question. “Well, Sally now that you’ve asked… I thought we would spend a few weeks fucking, you know, to keep my dick occupied until something better comes along.” The goofing put us in a better mood and got us laughing a bit. Keen to the fact that there were two fairly attractive girls standing next to us sipping drinks, Mike casually turns to them and says “What's the best way to respond to a girl when she asks ‘what is this’ and you’re not really into her?” The girls were all too eager to jump in with their opinions. The four of us quickly became immersed in conversation. Soon the question became “what do you say when someone tells you ‘I love you’ during sex, and you don’t feel the same way? This got the conversations even livelier and more provocative. Soon the two girls were met by another female

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friend and instantly dragged her into the conversations, introducing us to her as if we were long time acquaintances. After getting a handful of text messages from the girls we were supposed to be meeting later on, we decided to call it an evening and head home. Although both of the girls we were talking to at the bar were attractive, neither of them struck enough interest in Mike or me to ask for numbers. So we said goodbye and left. On the way home I got to thinking how smoothly the whole conversation transpired. It reminded me of another time a few months back when I used an opinion opener that lead to a one night stand. What the two nights had in common, and what I believe made the openers work so smoothly, was the fact that they were legitimate questions that we wanted the answer to. In the Houlihan’s story, Eddy and I were already engrossed in a conversation that was entertaining us, so it was perfectly natural to invite a couple girls into it- to share their opinions. Our energy was real and the girl’s sensed it… which opened them up to take interest in our opinion opener. The same thing happened last night with Mike. Mike and I were legitimately curious to know what a girl wanted to hear from a guy when she asks “what is this?” so the girls we asked were more than willing to commit to the conversation. I think that the biggest mistake guys make when it comes to fully understand how to use an opinion opener is that they don’t realize that they need to have some emotional involvement in the answer. If you’re using canned openers, chances are you are using an opener that someone else had emotional involvement in, and that is why it worked for them, and not for you. When I use the phrase “emotional involvement” it doesn’t mean you need to feel deeply and passionately about the topic, but it does mean that you have to have some level of curiosity and interest. For instance, most people have heard of Neil Strauss’s “80’s pop duo” opener. Neil Strauss found humor in naming dogs after an 80’s pop duo, so when he asked that opener at the very least he was entertained by the idea. Some people are out there using this same opener and weren’t even born in the 80’s and could care less about 80’s pop duos. These people have no emotional involvement in the opener and it will rarely work for

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them. If the notion of naming a couple pugs “Hall and Oates” doesn’t make you laugh, how is it supposed to be entertaining to a girl you’re imposing it on? Joseph Mathews wrote one of my favorite books on opening called “The Art of Approaching” but I think the biggest mistake others who buy that book make is that they skip all the great theory and skill building and flip right to the long collection of openers. There is nothing magic in an opener that Mathews created, or Mystery created, or Style or Tyler Durden or Mehow. Those are just openers that happened to work for them. Just like I wrote about Mike’s “what's the best answer” opener, and I’m sure I’ll read in some field report in a few weeks how someone used that as their opener. I think instead of focusing on what Mike said to initiate the conversation last night you should focus on the way the night took place. Mike and I went out to have some good conversation. We were discussing a topic that interested and entertained us. When the point in the conversation called for another opinion we casually turned to the girl’s next to us and asked them a question. Our energy was good, our topic interesting, and everything flowed from there. Now you may not always be in the middle of a great conversation when you want to approach a girl. If that’s the case, instead of using an opener from someone else’s past great conversation, use one from your own. If a couple nights ago you and a few friends were in a heated debate over whether or not American Idol is rigged… then draw upon that conversation for an opener. If you were talking about “who turns out more successful the high school nerds or jocks” then use that as opener. At least you had some emotional involvement in them at one point. And I think if you’re genuinely curious about the answer than you won’t hear that little nagging voice in the back of your head calling you a fraud when you say “Do floss before brushing?”


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Being Comfortable Talking Dirty
Written by Michael Stoute Original Published: 02/25/2008

Talking dirty to girls is something that I have struggled with for a long time. It is only now that I feel “pretty” comfortable doing it, still with some hesitancy. I am sure that this comes to some men pretty easily, but it just didn’t to me. There I was, enjoying some great sex when I hear “Tell me how you like fu*king my pus*y” Now don’t get me wrong, I did like fu*king her pus*y, yet I didn’t feel compelled to actually say it to her? Then when I would say it, I felt like I didn’t use a strong enough tone of voice and sounded weird. With all this going on I actually start to lose wood…Great! I couldn’t really understand why I was having this problem. I was confident in all other areas of my game, yet when it came to this I was on new ground. What I realized is that most of the problem had to do with me dating a different breed of woman. A woman who may not be so confident in life, but has ultimate confidence in the bedroom. Girls with more sexual experience than me in some cases… MAN UP These women want someone to take control; hair pulling seems to be as common a missionary these days. Spanking makes me think of booty’s, not babies and giving girls mild titty twister’s (purple nurple) is coming back. The sexual culture is changing and you may be missing it. Women like this don’t just tell you to pull their hair and spank them, you have to know! So how do you know?


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You have to build rapport and maintain Kino escalation to test the waters. (Build comfort and get her comfortable with you touching her and vice versa) Then move this forward veeeeerrrrrrryyy slowly. Maybe start while you are talking and touch her arm, and leave it there for like 5-10 seconds. NEVER GROPE! Keep it real calm and relaxed. Later on lean in to talk to her and use touching her leg as an effect in something you are saying. Example: You're telling some story about something and you say. “Then he grabs me and …..” When you say grabs me, grab her leg for a sec, at most until you finish your sentence, then pull away and continue with your story. Later on (if you are still being your cool guy self and are not being creepy) you need to start looking for opportunities to make a comment about her anatomy, I would go for the ass, one because it is the least confrontational and two, because I love ass! With confidence say something like, “You have a really nice looking ass, would you mind if I gave it a little smack?” MAKE SURE YOU HAVE GREAT KINO AND RAPPORT BEFORE ATTEMPTING A BOLD APPROACH LIKE THIS; IT WORKS FOR ME...THAT’S ALL I CAN SAY. Most girls just laugh, some let me smack it on the spot and others make me work for it a little. Either way, it’s a great SOI (statement of intent) that will for sure keep you out of the friend zone. If it does work, you may have just found you next sex tigress!


or a few days. don’t find it necessary to flirt. Tell me you want your space. In the beginning I need to wonder what's going on. and at least one of your hands in close proximity to my body. because then it would become predictable. I think that you'll find doing these same things will keep the girl interested as well. Nothing keeps me more interested than a girl I can’t figure out. but then never be available to hang out. We are all simply humans. and then use the term “friend” to describe me. Confuse me.The Best of TSBMAG. but then call me late night and tell me how much you miss me. 3. teasing. The point of a good date is the continuing escalation of sexual tension. I want inside jokes.COM 10 Ways a Girl Can Keep a Guy Like Me Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/09/2008 This is a list of what it takes for a girl to keep me interested. Big mistake. compliments. Tell me you want a relationship. I don’t want to talk about your job. I want to wonder if you’re going to return my call in a few hours. Play with my head. googly eyes. After I spend a week waiting for our Friday night date… I want you to call and say “something came up can we do it another night?” Of course I don’t want you do this all the time. I want to sit around and wonder why you’re not answering the phone. You have to do this through a mix of playful banter and gradually increasing the amount of time your hands spend touching parts of my body. nor am I impressed with how smart you are with your political views. Flirt damn it. And I want my buddies talking about 120 . Like my friends and get them to like you. I want to know that I will easily be able to commingle you and my buddies. In the beginning you need to create sexual tension. Do it just enough that I never know what I’m in store for. 1. 2. Too many girls. especially the hot ones. Be unpredictable. I’m shallow and need the complete approval of my friends before I would seriously consider making you my girlfriend. Once you tell me I lose interest. your daddy issues. 4. Spend three nights having wild passionate sex with me.

I’ll humor you and discuss your friend Sally’s relationship with her boyfriend or your brother’s drug problem… but what I really want to be talking about is my interests. and my hobbies. and bust my balls from time to time.Social Superstar “how lucky Bobby is” behind my back. I’m going to feed you a lot of bullshit. Make an honest attempt at getting along with them. your job is to make me feel like I just fucked your brains out harder than any guy you’ve had before. So will most other guys. 121 . I want you to crack a few jokes on me. Laugh at my failed attempts at show boating. Do not try to make me feel small. 8. don’t act like it's my obligation to always pick up the check. 5. 7. Seem excited by the prospect of all of us doing something cool together like a camping trip or ski weekend. Call me out on it. my travel. Be genuinely interested in my goals. but damn it. Way too many girls do this and don’t realize it is a real turn off to guys. But don’t be afraid to let me know I can’t get one over on you. I’ve achieved that goal. 6. And make me believe that you’ll have no problem with me continuing to hang out with them in the future. Sure. Other than the playful banter I spoke about earlier. And don’t just say “do you need some money?” Make a sincere effort to pay. In college my goal was to fuck as many girls as possible. And I’m a horrible liar so you’ll probably see right through it. Point out my short comings if I’m oblivious to them. So you better make an attempt to become vaguely interested in them too. You’re job in the beginning isn’t to show me how experienced and adventurous in bed you are… there is plenty of time to discover that later. Offer to pay occasionally. But I want to believe that I’ve opened up this new sexual side of you that never existed for your other boyfriends. I won’t let you. Call me out on my bullshit. It was my magic dick that unleashed your hidden whore. I know I’m not your first. I’m not cheap and would never accept your money in the beginning. these are really the only things I truly enjoy talking about. Make me feel like I’m the best you’ve ever had in bed. but if you don’t chances are I’ll be bitching to my friends about you. Challenge me. No. so now I’ve set higher long term goals involving my career. Do not belittle me.

So. Care about my well being more than I do.The Best of TSBMAG. I’m a busy guy.COM 9. I’ll fall for it every time. or maybe an “incident in college” early in our relationship… just enough to give me a glimmer of hope that one day I’ll find myself in bed with you and one of your friends. I’ll hold onto that hope long past the point where there seems to be any realistic chance of it happening. Hint at an attraction to other girls. My house is sloppy. I’m there. I’ll fix it…When you need someone to move a heavy piece of furniture. Hint at threesome. I can be a downright mess at times. and my sink is overflowing with dishes… I know this. When you get a flat tire. Just pick up a broom and give me a hand. when you notice that it's been a long time since I’ve changed my sheets… throw them in a basket and head to the laundry mat. 122 . 10. It's not your job to harass me about these things. my car is a wreck.

and working out again. that allow me to keep decently fit. But I am usually able to motivate myself in small bursts. Plow on. That adrenaline rush usually puts me in a talkative mood. Tonight at the gym I’m all amped up after downing a super sized Red Bull. “See that mirror. I’m naturally lazy. I’m reading the bodybuilding forums. “It's just my gym outfit. 123 . I want to crawl away.” “Oh yea?” she says.” I point at the mirror in front of us. “Never underestimate the power of a gym outfit. Still giving me nothing to work with.. so with confidence sky high I turn to the girl on the elliptical trainer next to me and say “that is a really nice color on you. The second after I say it I immediately have that twang of self doubt… like ‘what the fuck did I just say?’ That feeling of doubt is only amplified when she looks at me like I have three heads. “I read that it's a proven fact that the better we perceive ourselves to look while we’re working out.” She was wearing this pale blue shirt that really brought out her eyes.. So I’ve began one of those small bursts of motivation. I slack during the winter and then panic come spring when the scale starts tipping in the wrong direction. buying the supplements. the more motivated we become and the harder we push ourselves. She says..” My mind is telling me it was a stupid inappropriate moronic way to start a conversation.Social Superstar Keeping Cool and Plowing On Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/11/2008 Every so often I hit that point where the time comes I need to get my ass back in shape. Instead I take a deep breath and compose myself.” I tell her. You can’t lose on the opener..

I don’t go for a number or even a name. and gym pants with paint stains on them.The Best of TSBMAG. and casually build attraction. I look like I just rolled out of bed. And the next time I do will be one step closer to rapport. But they’re confident enough to keep going knowing that girls forgets your “opener” a minute after you say it. I’m looking really good tonight.COM I’m in the worst shape I’ve been in a couple years. you’re going to see the same girls. The point of this post is that many times you’ll initiate a conversation and get dead air. It is everything afterward that counts. wearing an old beat up t-shirt. I’ll see her again. That's the way I look at gym game. 124 . This finally gets the girl laughing and smiling. take a deep breath and plow on. Really really good! And I’m having a great workout!” I over exaggerate my motions on the machine. “For instance. The best approach is to mingle with a bunch of them. If you go to the gym the same time every day. It's easy to get nervous and go into deer in headlights mode… instead compose yourself. Even naturals struggle with initiating conversations. The interaction ends on a positive note.

I realized a little later that what I was doing wrong was trying to approach these girls in a rational way to spark interest. Or I would try too hard to fit in with the younger college guys to try to conceal my age. plowing through women (until I met the ex) but after college my skills trailed off in the same environment. You need to keep them in the moment if you want to score with them. Not ask them questions that make them dig for answers that take them into their head… but instead to make declarative statements about them… For instance.. When I was in college I was a machine. My topics of conversation usually involved questions like. The best way to keep them in the moment is to talk about them. I realized it was the way I was hitting on these girls that was fucking it up for me.Social Superstar How to Talk to Younger Women Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/14/2008 Tonight I’m heading to hang out with a few college guys that I know. None of this worked. In the tight nit college environment girls tend to be attention whores. “How do you like living in the dorms?” and then I would go on and tell them a story about my dorm life experience. I was talking to them in a way that was taking them out of the moment. These guys usually tend to be surrounded by hot college tail… so it got me thinking about gaming these younger girls. In Mark Redman’s excellent e-book Conquer Your Campus he talks about how college girls crave the college experience. My game on girls out of college was solid… but back in the old stomping ground I came across very AFC.. a line I’ve been using successfully when hanging around college girls is to turn to one of them and say “You’re trouble… There’s always one of you in the group…” and then smile. I would head to a college bar or college party and get no response from the girls I was trying to talk to. What I failed to realize is how self obsessed younger girls tend to be. 125 .

Then you can give her a nickname. Chances are she’s fucking some guy that lives in a dirty frat house eating Ramen noodles every night. 3. 2. A college girl doesn’t care how good your job is. A little mischievous. Use the environment directly around you as a source of humor 126 . My four step plan: 1..COM She’ll usually say “No. Avoid talking about “what is your major?”Or “Back when I was in college…” and don’t try to impress them with the things that tend to impress older girls. I’ll say something like “That guy over there is upset because he misses his dog” and then I’ll go off the cuff with some humorous reason I observe that. Very playful and fun… The trick is to keep the interaction fun. Assign her a nickname to establish rapport 4.The Best of TSBMAG.” This gets the conversation centered in the moment… Me and her talking about how she appears to me right now. or how much money you make. Not me… why do you think that?” I’ll then usually go into some cold reading “You just have that energy about you..” If that dies down a bit I’ll keep the conversation ‘in the moment’ by pointing at other people standing around us and begin making random statements about them. Use a little cold reading to keep interest. Make a declarative statement about her. I’ve even used something as simple as “Trouble.

And that was when I began going caveman on women. She started to finish her sentence. I used to be very guilty of talking myself past a hookup. The first time I did it was on a blind date. I can safely say that putting this idea into action took my game to the next level. especially girls.” We are all horny fucking creatures. This means they look for others to lead the way and let them know what they are doing is alright. Girl after girl in college I lost because of diarrhea of the mouth. You’re letting her feel comfortable expressing her sexual side. And since then I’ve done it that way.Social Superstar Going Caveman on Women Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/02/2008 Neil Strauss brought the term “caveman” into popularity in his book The Game. and progress toward sex. Why going caveman works People. but then lose her by talking myself past the moment. At the end of the night I kissed her mid sentence. Then one day things got completely easier. Strauss defines caveman as: To directly and aggressively escalate psychical contact. When you eliminate words and rational behavior. It was like a disease for me. I don’t know what provoked me to do that. have “make up my mind for me” syndrome. with a consenting woman. I would rope the girl in with witty banter and create the attraction. predicated on the idea that early human beings did not use intelligence and words but instinct and strength to mate. She was blown away. When you “go caveman” on a girl your bringing her into your level of animal like attraction. That night I created it. In the past I was one of those guys who always waited for the right moment. in turn you’re saying “it's okay to act a little irrational. We all have that side of us that wants to get buck naked and lick each other’s privates… most of us are just 127 . I put my finger to her lips to shut her up and then kissed her again. A friend and his girl set me up with one of her friends. Like life changing easier.

Going caveman means you stop talking and get physical. her and her friends came back to my house for the after party. Another night I went out with a group of friends. What would a caveman do? When things are going well and you’re in a private place with a girl… things can go one of two ways. At this point she is already attracted to you so you can either further emotionally or intellectually stimulate her… or you can sexually stimulate her. She was testing me. Later that night.The Best of TSBMAG. There was a girl Nancy that was with us who I had been flirting with on and off for a month. Instead of going into conversation about some stupid topic I started teasing her by gently pushing her away from me on the couch. (This does not mean take advantage of her or intrude if she says stop) It means get her on your level. That is cave manning!!! 128 . This was our first night hanging out though. If you’re looking to further escalate the encounter you need to ask yourself ‘what would a caveman do?’ Would he smell her hair? Would he bite her neck? Run his hands down her spine? Once you go caveman you can’t go back When you go into caveman mode it has to be for real. When we meet someone that allows us to act that way it is really liberating. and then I pin her down and kiss her. Unleash her hidden cavewomen. She pins me down. You can’t test it and then back peddle. Next thing I know we’re wrestling on my living room floor. When I kissed that girl mid sentence… she says “what was that” slightly snotty. She would push me back. If I had apologized or went back to talking things would have been weird… instead I put my finger to her mouth… shut her up and then kissed her again… After that she spent the night.COM trained not to act that way. No words were said.

Not only does it negatively affect you with the girl you’ve been working.” Well. He basically stopped talking to anyone around him and just sipped his drink looking miserable. But luck had it that she chose him to do body shots with. Well. She was drunk and kept getting side tracked chatting with everyone in the place. dance against. You could tell by the way he had his arm wrapped tightly around her in a “mine” sort of way that he was scared shitless of letting go in fear that his miracle score would disappear. If I noticed 129 . blonde California Hot never made it back to AFC. At this Irish Pub I was at last night in Cabarete some standard AFC scooped up a drunken blonde. he looked like a needy. the way he carried himself after she left sealed his fate for the worse. finally settling on some other guy across the bar. and stick her tongue down his throat. Here is where AFC blew it hard… and what I’m warning you against. whiny bitch…. and noticed something last night at a bar that I wanted to address. and even if she had originally wanted to return back to him.Social Superstar ever Show Emotion When She Walks Away Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/01/2008 I’m currently down in the DR scouting out villas for our upcoming Mansformation Retreat. I will have more about the trip when I come back in a couple days. depressed. do you think he’s making it tempting for her to return to him? Hell no. She was pretty drunk and was really anyone’s game. but right now I wanted to talk about how you should compose yourself when a girl you’re hitting on in a bar walks away. he had a right to be scared because a few minutes later the Irish guitar player called a couple of the girls from her group up to the stage to sing along with the chorus of “American Pie. AFC stood there alone with a sour puss on his face repeatedly glancing at her across the bar waiting for her to return. but it negatively affects you to every other girl in the place. Now.

if you’re talking to a hottie. AFC last night blew his whole night after losing one Hot. at least now you’ll be in a position to tackle other girls. flirting with other girls standing next to you. don’t make it obvious to everyone in the bar how happy you are to be talking to her… I’ve seen guys giving each other hi fives like a bunch of middle schoolers after scoring a number. and just genuinely having a good time. Because you can be sure that the girl will peak over at you and you want to give her a reason to come back. or other people around you. You’re safest bet is to engage yourself in conversation with the friends you came with.The Best of TSBMAG. and she leaves. or fuck another dude in the bathroom… you best play it extremely cool. You also want to keep her curiosity hooked on whether or not she has you. 130 . say hi to a friend. On the same note. Go back to talking with your friends. whether it be to take a piss. By acting like a sad little puppy when she leaves you’re killing your chance she’ll be back. how many other people noticed the same thing? When a girl you’ve been hitting on leaves. Forget about her until she comes back… and if she doesn’t come back.COM how miserable he looked.

Squeeze it firmly until the urge to orgasm passes. 4. a project at work. 131 . I know that I have trouble finishing when I’m doing a girl doggy style. big head at the top of the penis to delay it. Find out what position you tend to have trouble finishing with and switch to that position whenever you feel like you’re going to finish too early. Don’t wait too long to make the squeeze or you’ll wind up splurging in your hand. 3. This one can work wonders.Social Superstar 5 Tips for Lasting Longer in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/24/2008 Raise your hand if you’ve ever been a three pump chump. Switch positions to one your less likely to climax with. For me. I’ve never met a girl who bitched that you suddenly had the urge to eat her out. Squeeze the glands at the top of the penis. Relax for a few minutes and when you feel its safe… go back to work. It’s frustrating and embarrassing no doubt. 2. Use breathing patterns to prolong ejaculation. The most common way of trying to delay orgasm is to take your mind out of the moment and focus on something completely non sexual… like doing your laundry. If you feel yourself building up for an orgasm too quickly. pull out for a couple minutes and switch to some foreplay. It's best to take slow long breaths if you feel yourself getting too turned on. 1. but it also has the disadvantage of taking you out of the moment… As much as you want to stare down at her watching yourself go inside and out. The slow breaths will calm you down and let the urge to climax pass. or your grandmother. If you feel yourself about to orgasm early you and your partner can squeeze the smooth. Use this time to let the blood rush away from the head of your dick. it will help your cause if you close your eyes and daydream for a couple minutes. I’d say pretty much everyone reading this (who’s had sex) has had the misfortune of blowing their load a tad bit too early. 5. And it definitely won’t increase your chances of sticking your wilie in the girl again…but there are ways to prevent it.

The Best of TSBMAG. Remember. 132 .COM I hope that these tips will help you from prematurely ejaculating. you only get one chance to make a first impression.

Other people say that improving your stamina. Recently I was quite frustrated with a girl I was dating because I couldn’t get her off with oral sex. The woman that you’re sleeping with will give you all the clues you need… you just have to be ready to read them. and be willing to make the adjustments. All of those things definitely won’t hurt you… But they still won’t necessarily make you better in bed. The secret is to simply pay better attention to what is working and what isn’t on a particular woman. I’ve found there is only one secret for becoming a better lover.Social Superstar How to Get Better in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 Some people will tell you that the secret to getting better in bed is practice. the basics don’t change… but some girls like it hard and fast. 133 . The first few times with this girl it was driving me crazy. I searched my repertoire for all the things that worked on the previous girls… and she wasn’t responding to any of them. Sometimes she’ll verbally tell you what she likes… but most of the time you’ll have to watch how her body reacts. or adding more foreplay will make you a better lover. The best lover is attentive and knows how to read the clues she’s giving you. lasting longer. Finally about a month in. The key line to this statement is that you have to pay attention to what works on each and every particular woman you’re with. I noticed that every time my nose would press against her clit while going down on her. Some girls only cum on top… other girls get off doggie. she would tense up tremendously and push her pelvis out to make the pressure of my nose greater. Practice will get your sexual confidence up… but it won’t necessarily get you better in bed. I’ve never had that problem before. others slow and soft… some girls like massive foreplay… Others like their clothes ripped right off. The reason this is so important is because every woman enjoys being pleased differently. Needless to say she went from being indifferent to oral… to begging me for it. The minute I realized what she was reacting to I went right along with it. Sure.

You should also watch out for her body language. When she particularly fancies something you can be sure she’ll let out an extra special moan in hopes you catch on. while groping my right tit. Everyone kisses differently. This goes for all areas of foreplay and sex. most girls want to tell you what is working and what isn’t. Sure. or pull you closer. or I begin the foreplay in any room but the bedroom. Some girls are wildly turned on by the idea of being caught. But if you want that first kiss to be memorable you’ll quickly note the actions of her lips and tongue.The Best of TSBMAG. What you have to realize is that just because they’re not going to open up their mouth and say “Bobby I really like when you stick a pinky in my ass. fear of embarrassment.) The fact is. She’ll do everything possible to prevent you from suddenly stopping or changing positions. you can try to change her style to match yours.COM I’ve had many girls tell me that I’m the most amazing kisser they’ve ever experienced. The key is to be extremely observant and act upon the giving stimulus. or fear of killing the mood. If you notice that a girl gets super wet and turned on when you whisper dirty commands in her ears… keep on doing it (but don’t overdo it and let it loose its affect. This is not because I have some special technique… it’s because I adjust to their particular style of kissing. 134 . The most common things to look out for are the intensity of the grunts and moans she is making. When she is enjoying something she’ll usually tense up. and mimic them. push herself toward you. and spreading my legs over my head…” doesn’t mean they won’t be trying to telling you in every other conceivable way. When I sense a girl has this fetish… I’ll make sure I leave a door open. But they won’t tell you out of fear of hurting your feelings. blinds up. You also want to be paying attention to the psychological factors influencing how turned on she is getting.

I didn’t realize exactly how wrong until she reached her hand down my pants. But the minute I had a girl willing to come back to my place… I would lose all feeling down there. I didn’t lose my virginity until my freshman year at college. and unhooked her bra with the skill of a pro… but something was noticeably wrong. There was this exhilarating sense of accomplishment. I wound up in a relationship with a girl from my math class. I still remember the first night I brought a girl back to my dorm room. Have you ever found yourself with a girl. That night was the beginning of my journey on a long and bumpy road to sexual competency. She fumbled around for a minute before I embarrassingly brought her hand back up to my chest and continued kissing her like nothing happened. We were having marathon foreplay sessions where I would expand so big I felt I could burst… 135 . I was completely limp. and I have to thank my blogger friend Evil Woobie for pushing me to finally write it. things are escalating towards intimacy… and absolutely nothing is going on down there? Or you manage to finally get an erection… only to quickly lose it as you attempt to slide the condom on? If you haven’t already experienced these situations… chances are you will at some point in your life. this paralyzing fear of inadequacy. I was jerking off twice a day… hard as a rock. I was surprisingly competent at making out. She was a virgin too. We took it slow in the bedroom and soon I was functioning full strength during make out sessions. I sure have. and at the same time. Because of this I felt apprehensive about hooking up with girls as I imagined them all to be much more experienced than me. I knew that physically there was nothing wrong with me… I mean.Social Superstar Having Trouble Getting Hard? Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/04/2008 This is a post I’ve been meaning to write for awhile.

Alcohol in small doses helped the problem. The more time I had to prepare for the sexual encounter… the more anxiety I felt. 136 . After we broke up I entered the hell of erectile dysfunction all over again. girls I wasn’t supposed to sleep with. For the rest of our relationship I never wore a condom because I saw it as Kryptonite to my erection. I found it almost impossible to put on a condom without losing or at least greatly diminishing my erection. What I learned about my experience with limp dick 1. and then a movie.) fat girls. My next few attempts ended the same way. We went out to dinner. girls I didn’t want to sleep. It most often happened in experiences where there was a built up pressure involved. I never got around to putting a condom on. 5. By this time I was tearing it up with the girls on my campus. My girlfriend went on the pill… so all was well. Alcohol in large doses made me lose all sensitivity down there. 3. And the more anxiety I felt… the less chance I would get or maintain an erection. The girls I had the best sex with were the ones I felt no pressure to perform well… i. Mainly because I feared going for the homerun… only to fail. 2. The less comfortable I was with the girl… the less chance of success in the bedroom.COM But then the night came when she decided she was ready to give me her virginity.e. This meant that if I could make it past the first few mishaps with a girl… it would be smooth sailing from there on out. Of course. The entire time my mind was racing with anxiety over how well I would perform at something I’ve waited 18 years to attempt.The Best of TSBMAG. I managed to fondle myself in the bathroom enough to get it up… but when she handed me a condom to place on my boss… I fizzled away. But I was very rarely closing the deal with them. When we finally got to my place I was a nervous wreck. 4. It wasn’t until one morning when she climbed on top of me… slid me inside her and starting bouncing up and down… that I finally was able to maintain an erection.

For the first time I felt there wasn’t just something fundamentally wrong with me.Social Superstar 6. Other times I would blame it on “just getting out of a relationship. How I Handled the Problem when it occurred If I didn’t avoid sex completely with a girl… I would prolong it as long as possible with massive amounts of foreplay. and just about every other over the counter supplement… and none of them made a damn difference. to let anyone going through this know… it isn’t just you. If there was still nothing going on down there… I would eat her pussy and call it a night. Herbal supplements don’t work. 137 . Visualizations are a powerful tool that can be used for achieving any goal… but for me. I was amazed to find that pretty much all of them had experienced the problem before.” Other times I would blame it on being “stressed out over finals”. Sometimes I would blame it on being “too drunk. The next biggest breakthrough came with using visualizations. Whenever I was on a date with a girl I would start letting the anxiety take over and imagining the pain and embarrassment I would feel if I couldn’t get it up. overcoming erectile dysfunction was where I saw the most distinct result. I took Yohimbe. Once I was armed with the knowledge that other guys have gone through this too… I became a lot less nervous about the situation. Some of them were even experiencing it as regularly as me.” What I did know was that my sexual confidence was completely down the toilet for awhile there. Road to Recovery The biggest break through that I had was one day opening up to my friends about my problem. Ginseng. I realized that much of the cause of the problem was me visualizing the worst possible outcome. Horny Goat Weed. I would pull her hand away and just pretend that I was teasing her to build anticipation. Man Power. If a girl started to reach down there and I wasn’t hard. That is my biggest inspiration for writing the article.

If you’re going through the problem right now the best advice I can give you is to stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. The hardest obstacle to overcome was my aversion to condoms. An odd thing happened the next time we had sex. The mind naturally attracts what we focus on the most. Instead change your focus to the mind blowing sex you intend to have. because it was the best sex of my life too. When we finally finished she said “that was by far the best sex of my life. A few years after college I began dating this girl who refused to sleep with me raw dog. If for some reason I still lost my hard on I stopped beating myself up over it. I’ve worn them consistently since her and never once lost my erection putting one on. We honest to god.The Best of TSBMAG. Oddly enough… with all the girls I slept with I never once had a girl force me to wear a condom. It’s part of being a man. Since then my mind did a 180 degree turn in regards to condoms. Repeat the image of yourself performing competently over and over in your mind. but my performance was less than stellar as my penis was only barely hard. I would hold the vision of this unbelievable sex in mind and it was like a fortress blocking out the anxiety. Whenever I started to feel anxiety creep in… I would start imaging having the wildest hottest sex imaginable with the girl.COM I changed my internal visualizations.” And I believed her. Conclusion It’s been many years since I’ve faced the embarrassment of an episode. fucked for like four hours straight. 138 . I was hard as a rock. but if I felt myself shrinking… I would chuck it aside. I fucked her all over her house. but could not cum. I would imagine myself hard as a rock jamming her to the point of pain. We had the most mind blowing sex of my life. I would tell myself “it happens” and then begin looking forward to my next opportunity to sleep with the girl. Soon I found that I was actually going home and having the sex I was imagining. I made her come multiple times. I would attempt to wear them on occasion. I began viewing them as a tool to last longer in bed. My first time using a condom with her I managed. I don’t kid myself to believe it will never happen again.

and get back on the horse.Social Superstar If the problem still arises don’t put too much emphasis on it. Do any of you have any tips for guys who might be facing this problem? 139 . Look at it like a stumbling block.

I don’t know. it’s because you haven’t learned to recognize when you’re being tested or just haven’t yet learned how to respond properly. or have been told. when you set rules and boundaries for her to follow. this is important. you can tell this is happening when you hear something like “Uh…well. Could that really be true? Frankly. If you’ve ever been dumped for being “too nice”.COM Wimps into Winners Written by Ross Jeffries Original Reprinted: 03/07/2007 Originally newsletter from: http://speedseduction. never get fed) 3. How hungry you are for her attention (remember: those who look hungry. or there’s some unseen competitor who she’s waiting to hear from.The Best of TSBMAG. and how to do some testing of your own. In this issue. I’d like to talk about how you can pass those tests. to see: 1. The other factor is ambivalence. You thought you would get points for being “co-operative” a “helpful”. 2. time and again. the sad reality is that often a woman just isn’t that interested in you one way or another. maybe she just got burned in a bad relationship. Just how much control she can exert over you and/or the relationship. a woman will test you by the second date. This search for strength is the single most important reason why she tests you. But I will say this: 95% of the time. or sooner. You see. Maybe you aren’t exactly the physical type she goes for. Why She Tests You: The Search for Strength and Certainty Look: one of the primary things that women are looking for from a man is security. Believe me. the feeling that someone is stronger than they are. and instead you just got the fuzzy end of the lollipop. When you put a woman in her place. or what I call the “make up my mind for me” syndrome. it lets her know she can relax around you and feel comfortable and secure. “let’s just be friends”. Whatever her reasons. I’d like to go out with you Friday. but why don’t you call me late Friday afternoon and I’ll let you know for sure?” 140 . If you’ll take her There’s a common saying in street fighting that 95% of all real fights wind up in a clinch and go to the ground.

modern women just get overwhelmed with eighty billion things they are trying to do at once. when you are in bed with her. “But you promised!” won’t cut it. increase her interest. “How could you do this to me?” or. your response to these tests. they flake on commitments that occur during the peak of the overwhelm. an attack. since you know it’s your chance to get her really hot for you!!!! Now. HAH! A RESPECT OPPORTUNITY!!! Look: your attitude has to be that every rude piece of behavior. when overwhelmed. And. is just an unprecedented opportunity to… KICK THE OTHER GUY’S ASS!!!! Just so. and intensify her desire to please you. good buddy. In other words. … IT’S GOT TO COME FROM THE RIGHT PLACE IN YOU!!! In other words. Whining stuff like. rather than something to be feared. AH. All he’s doing is showing he can’t control himself and he just earns the woman’s contempt. the fighting style of the late. instead of being. the macho idiot who loses control and trashes the place when his girlfriend comes home ten minutes late is definitely not the example to follow.Social Superstar Finally. Coming from this perspective. and may even find yourself actually looking forward to her trying to pull shit. How to Handle It…Dealing from a Position of Strength To get back to street fighting analogies. “Oh no… why is she doing this? What did I do wrong?” from now on will be…. Just don’t go nuts with a stream of obscenities. there’s a concept from Jeet Kun Do. a woman’s bullshit and tests are great opportunities to establish respect and dramatically increase her interest in you. but firm 141 . as part of an attack is just a convenient target to be destroyed. before we go on to some specific scenarios. great Bruce Lee that basically says that any weapon thrust your way. Notice I’m not saying you can’t or shouldn’t get a little pissed. there is the fact that sometimes. (Streams of obscenities are for afterwards. You have to come from the calm. you’ll be mentally prepared. No.) The other thing that doesn’t work is acting like a hurt little boy. Taken from this perspective. every silly test of hers is just an unprecedented opportunity for you to establish respect. let me add one other thing: when you do put her in her place.

you’re embedding a command that she really does want to go out with you. Will this work? Very often it does. This is all part of displaying the critically important… WILLINGNESS TO WALK AWAY FROM HER!!! You see. I’ve come to the conclusion that a woman can only experience real passion for you if on some level she believes she could do something to lose you! Understand that when you show this willingness to walk away. and that always gets attention. after years of experience and study.COM “take it or leave it” position. Is going out with me something you can take or leave or is it something that you’re smart enough that you really want to do that?” Then shut the hell up and listen for her answer. that you are the person of value. Scenario one: You call to ask her out for the first time. What if she still hesitates? Well. if you show a non-stop. You have my number.The Best of TSBMAG. And you know. then where is that tension of knowing she could lose you? Answer: Nowhere! And that’s why you get nowhere when you put up with this kind of stuff! If you’ve seen an initially hot relationship grow ice-cold. something like. Just be as matter of fact and non-hostile as you can. Now. point blank. in any area of your life. “Well. why don’t you call me later in the week and…. Her response is ambivalent. and they had better take advantage of the opportunity. it conveys the message that you are the prize to be pursued.” Here’s your response: “Let me ask you a question. By way of contrast. this is one big reason!!! Ok. It’s not what she’s expecting. what are you doing here? You’re calling her on her ambivalence and letting her know you don’t have time to be put on hold. and I’m going to leave it up to you. And you’re also suggesting she’s stupid if she doesn’t grab this opportunity. Understatement works best with this one. This is an attitude that will move you forward in any area that’s challenging you. On to some scenarios. Finally. forever and ever devotion to her. and put up with her crap and ambivalence. if you don’t call it’s going to be a loss 142 . I’d like to but. say this one: You: Look.

HANG UP!! Now. if someone makes a commitment to me. My rule is. Her: What????? You: Look…you made a commitment to spend time with me and now you’re blowing me off. I’ve seen the hardest. If they can’t keep it. Just say NOTHING!!!) Her: Hello? Are you there? What’s wrong? You: What’s wrong is I can’t believe the bullshit I’m hearing. Scenario Two: She calls and cancels at the last minute without offering to do it again at some specific time. I need to know at least a day in advance so I can make other plans. eager to please me when I’ve done this. but maybe what you won’t realize until after you hang up is. great…if not. Got it? If you can live with that rule. she’ll probably call back with five minutes and apologize and ask you out!!! I’m not kidding here. It throws some kind of switch in their heads. NOT your fists. jaded bitches go to giggly little girls.Social Superstar for me. I expect them to keep it. I can’t make this too clear. but man does it work well!!! In fact. from “My parakeet is sick” to “I’ve got to shampoo the rug”. I am against the use or threat of the use of violence or force against ANY human being. I’ve got a rare tropical disease that’s causing me to shrink by the hour. You’re disrespecting me and disrespecting my time and I’m NOT going to put up with it. my friend. that it’ll be a loss for you as well. I am NOT talking about or in any way suggesting or condoning physical violence with a woman. Ok? Bye. you don’t really get their attention until… You Give Them A Swift Kick In The Ass!! Please note I’m speaking of an attitude. 143 . I’m talking about using your mind. this may sound extreme. sayonara! Then. Seriously) Her: I can’t make it. unless there is an imminent threat of violence against yourself or a loved one. You: (dead silence for as long as it takes for her to talk again. In fact. (I’ve heard every excuse in the book. I guess with some people.

doesn’t it? ‘Til next time. and these tests will become opportunities to power her straight into your bed.COM Scenario Three: You go to pick her up at her place and she either keeps you waiting outside for more than ten minutes. or are you just accidentally acting clueless? HER: (mouth dropping open in shock. Ross 144 . Piece and peace. The point is this: when women throw this stuff your way. Walk a middle ground of strength. self-control AND self-respect. Don’t put up with it. Wait for her to finish. but I expect the same. YOU: Are you being intentionally rude to test me. Do you understand me? HER: Uh…uh…yes. And that certainly beats a poke in the eye. ok? I’ll always treat you respectfully. and as soon as she does say something like this: YOU: Can I ask you a question? HER: Sure. unable to say anything!) YOU: Don’t ever keep me waiting like this again. or lets you in and then proceeds to talk on the phone for at least that long while totally ignoring you. like a “nice guy” and don’t lose your temper like a jerk.The Best of TSBMAG. you want to do the unexpected.

Don’t think girls don’t read your comments. Just don’t tell too many people what you’re doing. Anyway. So if you want to create a good jealousy trap. So I left a comment from a fake chic telling me how great of a time she had. they pay attention and remember shit like that. I actually forgot about my fake comments until a girl I used to have a thing for came back into my life. 145 . Comments like “what a great time last night…” “Your party rocked…” “I was so surprised how well endowed you are. But it wasn’t my fake profile girl. the girl I was bummed missed the party actually mentioned something like “I know you had fun that night!” She said this because she read the comment and assumed I went home with the girl… Actually I went home with a girl that night. as they teach in the Art of Seduction. Anything that would add some value to our profile page. But the point is. I and my nameless friend took this tactic a little further about a year ago. I was pretty bummed she missed it. Take advantage of this tip. This is a great way to create a triangle. I know that Dave M teaches about creating recon profiles in his Insider Internet Dating course. I’m glad I didn’t invent this. that honor would go to one of my friends who’ll remain nameless.Social Superstar Ultimate MySpace Jealousy Tool Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 12/23/2007 Ok. We got to talking and we were talking about my Halloween party last year that she missed. But you get the point... My friend's tactic goes one step further. and a little joke about a photo in my room. You’ll look like a real ass if you get caught. and it's still paying off… What we did was create a couple fake female profiles on MySpace. Just like you read the comments of a girl you’re interested in. They do. I'm going to put a patented “sleazy” on this post. A recon profile is a fake female profile you create to attract men… the point of the profile is basically to see what your competition is writing to women online. what a great host I was.” no just kidding about that last one. Then what we did was leave comments from them on our real profiles. Even for Bobby Rio this is sleazy.

you best give her the fuck of the century. Fuck that! Even Bobby Rio rolls with the fatties some time. Aim lower. at home Friday night masturbating guys always seem to have really high standards? These guys who have absolutely no experience with women are waiting for the perfect 10 to come along. I’m not saying you shouldn’t strive to fuck hotties. You’ve read the story! It’s all just practice for the big game. no ass getting. Haven’t you notice the guys who fuck the hottest chicks also fuck the ugliest as well. You don’t go from T-ball to the big leagues without some time in the minors. When you get the perfect 10 in bed. just today's thought. That way when you do meet the perfect 10 you’re experienced enough sexually not to blow your load in three minutes.The Best of TSBMAG. Anyway. Plus its fun… but don’t tell anyone. 146 . C’mon guys. Like they’re way too good for her.COM Aim Lower Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/15/2007 Just a quick thought… How come all of the virgin. Is it a front you're putting up? Is it easier to say you’ve got really high standards than it is to admit you have no game and are afraid of girls? I say this because I have a few buddies who are perpetually alone. And when I try to set them up with a “not so hot” chick they act like I’m crazy for suggesting it. I’m just saying that in the meantime get your feet wet with some piggy's.

I think that is why Neil Strauss's book became so famous. never political. So are canned openers good? If it takes using a canned opener to get you to have the confidence to open your mouth in front of a girl then by all means use them. So what makes a good opener? The reason that openers Mystery uses or Style or any of the other canned ones that have become popular over the years. These were original openers that better matched my unique personality. are so good is because they are non threatening. the hooks. topical (mainly topics girls might be interested in) and they are sometimes comedic. always light… meaning the topics are never depressing. Openers. Openers Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/29/2007 It seems that the topic of openers is all the rage lately. A conversation starter. I took everything I learned in the amazing book and constructed my own “canned” openers. the routines… but I never used them in the field. It seems that people love googling openers looking for the page of perfect ones to use in bars/clubs/banks/hot dog stands/Wall Marts…. (Or hasn’t it always been?) What are good openers? Will Mystery openers still work? Are canned openers good? Mike Stoute and I did a podcast about openers a few months ago. Essentially.Social Superstar PUA Openers. that is all an opener is. Remember the topics at times are supposed to cause arguments (who lies more… floss before or after… is kissing cheating…. but I feel that it's time to write on the subject again.. So in reality anything that you say to a girl is an opener. never anything that can be angrily argued about. 147 . I memorized the punch lines. I read about how to deliver them. And I want to hear some comments and feedback to see what all of you think about the topic. never racial.) but the openers cause flirty type of arguments… not real heated win or lose type arguments. What I did when I was first starting out years ago was I bought the book The Art of Approaching and basically took the 50 or so openers he gives you in there and studied them. I looked for the reasons that they work. Because it gave a lot of people a handbook of what to say to a girl to start a conversation. I used the outlines he gave and wrote openers that actually interested me..

COM For instance the question “Do you floss before or after brushing” became my opener “That piece of meat in a wonton soup… what the hell is it?” The opener “Is kissing cheating?’ became “Would you let your fiancé go to Thailand for his bachelor party?’ “You have a real confident way about you” became “You have a friendly air about you. to fit the mood of the moment. It's all about how you sell it. they were imagining themselves pulling the cord. From there I started developing routines to lead into. I created a whole shit load of openers that brought up topics I liked and started using them. the impatient tandem jump instructor yelling at me… these things made the story come alive… these things got me LAID that night. my friends and I had three different sets of girls swarmed around us waiting for me to answer the burning question “will I pussy out or will I go sky diving tomorrow?” My friend opened the set my telling them to talk me out of being a pussy.The Best of TSBMAG. But usually these stories weren’t lies… they were stories that happened to me. I used my imagination and turned a true story about my backing out of a skydiving trip… into this life or death moment of manhood bullshit that the girls ate up. Once you know the purpose of a routine (demonstrating higher value. These thing got one of my friends 148 . I remember once. disarming obstacles…) they became easy to make up. sometimes I felt like a liar…(”it's not lying its flirting” lol) Sometimes I would return to a bar a couple weeks later and have to remember some story I made up and roll with it again." The jealous girl friend opener became “Would you be mad if your boyfriend slept with Jennifer Anniston?” This is how I got by in the beginning. I told the story… I had them imagining themselves in the plane. Yes. you must not be from New Jersey. By reading books like Magic Bullets I was able to see how to construct a routine. Sometimes I cheated and used a Mystery routine. the wind. Tell me I only live once… blah blah… I ran with it. As I used them more and more I began to see a pattern of how girls reacted to them. dates. To tell me I will regret it. (back then they weren’t so cliché) but more and more I began making up the routines on the spot. I just changed names. genders.

It's to tell you that openers aren't some magic mysterious lines that are hidden away for a select few. and you’re going with the flow. He still thanks me. It's fun.Social Superstar LAID that night… the other one (with the least game) got a number and wound up fucking her three dates later. Man. you can’t ask for a better feeling!!!!! 149 . When you go out and the night really becomes an adventure. It's easy. My point isn’t to brag. They are merely conversation starters. and it's working…. Things are even truer when you get to the point that you’re not using canned ones. Once you know how to construct a good opener. It actually makes you look forward to going out.

You don’t need to promise her flowers and diamonds. 150 . Your intention should be to give her as much sexual pleasure as possible. someone with a little baggage… your goal here is not to fall in love. If you're wondering where to find these fuck buddies. or Adult Friendfinder. Your goal is get comfortable being sexual. They are on Match. What's great about a fuck buddy is that because you’re getting laid a couple nights a week you won’t be so needy and hungry when you're out hunting. Women can smell neediness a mile away. but if you’re a guy that's been sitting on the sidelines for years you’re going to need a little experience in the bedroom before you start fucking around with 9 and 10s. They are at bars. do it. Remember “you only get one chance to make a first impression. maybe a chunker with a cute face. Use each other. talking sexual to girls. escalating. Nothing more. That's great.COM How to Calm Your Sexual eediness Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 09/19/2007 Too many guys jump into this seduction/PUA stuff swinging for the fences.” And women want guys who get laid.The Best of TSBMAG. This means getting comfortable touching girls. So what's the best way to do this? If you're less than experienced in the bedroom I recommend going out and getting yourself a fuck buddy. They are all over. The more comfortable and confident you get in your sexual abilities the more natural it will be for you to act sexual around women. If you're fucking a girl right. And don’t feel bad about it. she won’t ask for those things.” And it works.” Back in the day me and my friends would call it “practicing for the big game. As much as your ego must hate the idea of slumming. I’m talking about a plain Jane.” Every time we fucked a girl that was ugly or fat we would blow it off to “practice. You probably work with one of them. They can look at you and know if you “get laid.

We all have heard some variation of this in our lives and we know it is not an easy thing to hear. I was doing a telephone Life Coaching session for a 19-year old young man named Dan. Like many of us. They spend exorbitant amounts of money on makeup. gym memberships. this incident left Dan confused and filled with self-doubt about his women-reading skills. this attention becomes like a drug. had an additional problem that he and many others often need help with: discerning a girl’s interest or lack of interest. I am used to young men coming to me for confidence boosting and for improving their internal and external relationship with the opposite sex. With this fact in mind. though. I explained to him that this was a frequent mistake I see in men: They don’t know how to tell the difference between when a girl wants them or their attention. They don’t understand how to tell. Many women measure themselves based on how many men hit on them or give them second glances. it is very important to keep in mind that when you think that a girl is into you. when he asked her out for coffee.just in case you have not noticed. plastic surgery. that she was not into him. especially a very hot one. Original Published: 04/24/2008 Recently.Social Superstar Are You the Man or Just the Fan? Written by Justin B.” She had been smiling at him and eagerly said hello to him every time he came into the gym. though. He claimed that “all the signals were there. He had recently had a bad blow to his intuitive confidence in this area when he had thought that a beautiful and single girl that went to his health club was interested him. put into my own little rhyme sequence. etc. He was sure she was into him and even admitted to me that he started envisioning how jealous his friends would be when he landed this hot babe. He was to find out. if she is looking at him as “the man or a fan. She expressed to him that she saw him as a “cool guy and a friend. she may be really into the 151 .” Ouch.” Let's get these fact straight fellas: Women love attention. Especially to hotter girls that are used to getting the attention. to beautify themselves. they had good conversations and she seemed receptive to and appreciative of his frequent compliments. This young man. clothes.

1) Most of the time if a woman is truly attracted to you she is going to be self-conscious around you. often like to feel the “butterflies” in their stomach and like to feel that they are “being kept on their toes.” It sounds crazy but it is true. If a woman seems not to care about the impression that she is making on you then most likely you are “just a fan. by contrast.not only my own experience with women. This principle will be interwoven in some of the pointers that I address. If you are interested in the exact psychology behind this: in short the stomach area is a part of a woman’s body that she is usually very conscientious about. and collected we were and try to find ways not to feel and appear nervous. Below are 2 general principles and tips for judging a girls interest or lack of it. Psychology is not an exact science and a lot of the advice about human behavior is true to the extent that it shows trends. There are many more but these 2 seem reoccurring.” Before I go into giving some very good and specific tips let me first issue a disclaimer about anything cookie cutter when it comes to human behavior.COM attention that you are showering her with. Women. I remember a few years back I was not sure if this very attractive girl that I worked with was into me. She is going to seem a little nervous and cognizant of her behavior. Watch particularly if you think you look good one day for her tugging at the bottom of her shirt by her stomach area: This is usually a sign that she thinks you are attractive and wants to measure up. Pay careful attention as you read and do not read this hastily. So. When we men go on a date we like to take pride in how calm.The Best of TSBMAG. There is an important principle to keep in mind when seeking to understand women: Women actually like being nervous sometimes. by now you are probably wondering how you tell if you are “the man or just a fan. This does not mean that she does not think that you are attractive or that there is no chance of changing her interest. Watch also for her brushing her hair back nervously. but also from having women as Life Coaching clients and friends. There was a group of us who ate lunch together in the building cafeteria that talked politics 152 . cool.” I don’t just mean a physical impression either. but you must learn to tell the difference if you don’t want to waste your time and set yourself up for needless rejection.

She noticed on his keychain that he had a key tag for PETCO. We usually stop by there after the gym and there was a hot chick working there behind the courtesy desk that goes to our gym.” She laughed and knew that it was true. If she wants to know if you have a girlfriend you don’t have to tell her. then it probably is an addiction. He cut her off and said “If you are asking about it. She will find ways to be closer to you and look for excuses to ask you questions. One day we were alone in the cafeteria and a news story came on television about the war in Iraq. Scott said that she had been smiling at him a little in the gym but he was not sure if it was friendly or personalized to him. but did smile at me and listened when I spoke. I walked over with him and she saw his yogurts and asked him if they were good. My friend Scott and I were in A&P a few weeks ago. he got her number and was out with her that weekend. not a group of you.she probably will find a cute way of asking. most likely you are unfortunately “just a fan. A few months ago I was on a teleseminar conference call about addictions with one of America’s best health experts. “I am not sure if it is an addiction…” she stated.” 2) Is she asking you questions about yourself? Bottom line guys: If a girl is not asking you questions about yourself most likely she is not into you. She ate with us but never said much during these conversations. Not surprisingly. You guys get the point by now: If a girl is not trying to overtly impress you. if you are wondering and find yourself 153 . David Simon. To close. Then she asked him something that sealed the deal and left no room for doubt. Right then I knew that I was not just “a fan” and I got her number. She asked him if he had a dog and as he answered her questions.she had never tried them she said. nor really look like she really cares what you think and is a little nervous. If a girl is interested in you. They had exchanged pleasantries but the conversations were always short because she was working out with friends.Social Superstar regularly and with a lot of zeal and passion. He bought a 6-pack of soy yogurts and I told him to go ask her if she could ring him up. She confessed in a cute way that she had asked her friend who knew a lot about the war to fill her in because she wanted to appear smart in front of me. I walked away. I want to tell a quick story. she asked more questions. A participant asked him about her habit of drinking a large Starbucks coffee every day. she will want to know more about you and will find a way to ask you. Using the same principle. On this particular day she had a lot to say and I looked at her quite impressed.

the answer is probably what you do not want to hear: that she is not into you. then.The Best of TSBMAG. like the caller.” Thank you Justin – 154 .COM asking if a girl is into you. and you are unfortunately a “fan” and not “the man.

The show begins with a plane crash. 155 . but being the show is in its fourth season and I’m at the beginning… my post would be old news for most of you. and watch the first season of Lost on DVD.. I have resisted watching Lost for years but at the insistence of my brother and a couple friends I decided to give the show a shot. takes charge. The truth is we watched eight straight episodes of Lost and passed out on the couch halfway through the ninth.. I could write a whole post about the show. The point of this post isn’t to talk about Lost. Shit is upside down.. but to talk about leadership. and has all of the survivors looking up to him within an hour of the plane crash.. We are so fascinated with them because very few of us have the intestinal fortitude to be one. Jack selflessly tries to help everyone on the island. No one has a clue what to do. success… but more importantly a sense of purpose. Women. confusion mode. down a bottle of Pinot. I’ve been hanging with this girl for a couple weeks now and we decided to stay in last night. People are fascinated with leaders. Everyone is in panic. I’d love to tell a story about how 30 minutes into the first episode we were having animal sex on my kitchen table or how her friend showed up and we had a mind blowing three way… but that just wasn’t the case. And just like Jack these guys get life’s bounty. But there are people out there just like Jack. Jack. money. She had never seen it either and was into the idea of starting the series from the beginning. and I’m sure you guys would wind up spoiling a lot of shit for me. order Chinese. Sure it's a television show. wakes up from his black out and immediately takes on the roll of the leader.Social Superstar The Hero the Bounty and the Purpose Driven Life Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 02/24/2008 It was a very tame Saturday night for me. Until the main character.

He didn’t get the girl because he sold her on his ideas through long winded speeches and debates. In a world so obsessed with “self help” I think we often neglect the fact that the best form of “self help” is the selfless act of helping others. waiting for my slice of the where he detailed his six month trip across the continent of South America. To prove to myself that I wasn’t wasting my life away in the rat race. I don’t have any regrets.The Best of TSBMAG. Yet. And for the longest time that was my dream. and waking up in strange places with strange people. He’s back now and I recently posed a question to him in a comment.COM Jack didn’t become a leader because he was the best politician on the island. growing a beard. I had been following a blog. my motives for the trip are still entirely selfish. I realize that part of the reason I wanted to take the trip was for some form of escape. Because when it comes down to it. wishing badly it was me trekking on a bus through the Peruvian Andes. having three week flings with Chilean beauties. watching Lost last night I still felt as if I were missing something important. I recently wrote a list of 5 Must Have Self Help Books and that list included two books by Wayne Dyer. slept with more women than I care to admit. He did it through purpose and action. something along the lines of “did you find what you were looking for?” Because I’m starting to believe that even the soul searching trip I felt destined to make…. Many books talk about living on purpose. I can’t speak for anyone but myself but there are times in my life that I feel an overwhelming sense of being unfulfilled. I followed his journey religiously. He obtained the respect of everyone on the island because while they were standing around waiting to be saved… he was saving other people. and generally lived on the edge and survived to tell about it. I’m not sure freedom is as simple as throwing on a backpack. But I’m not so sure escape is that easy. Rooshv. I’ve got more friends than I can count. still won’t be enough. But even with all the books that I’ve read on the subject. I was going to finally live. Some way to convince myself that I was free. And I’ve had more than I ever dreamed I would. Dyer has written many books about living on purpose. I was going to take it. it took watching seven 156 . visited more countries than most people could name. I think it is impossible to be free. And when you’re living completely self centered.

Jack that was inside of me waiting to be released. or national independence. pursuing. Jack that she knew she would never see in me. I would be waiting for something to happen that would make me think “now I’m really living” but more than likely I would spend six months waiting. Maybe it was the deliriousness of staring at a television screen until the wee hours of the night. how can I experience a sense of purpose in my life? Take on the role of leader? What kind of higher goal will transcend me to the next level of living? I think that my problem with the Dyer books I’ve read about purpose driven life. Most of us will never have the opportunity to deliver a speech like William Wallace gives in Braveheart or liberate a nation through self sacrifice like Gandhi did. analyzing. but does that mean we have no choice but to view ourselves as less significant. A little lost. each speaker recollecting a 157 . or the previous movies such as Gandhi. curing cancer. worldwide democracy. judging. While these are all noble causes. or realizing that the girl sitting next to me was seeing something in Dr. I felt it was ‘beyond me’ to live selflessly. and then wake up and decide it was time to go home. or Braveheart is that I always sort of believed you needed to be inspired by notions like ending world hunger. and rationalizing the trip’s every minute. peace in the Middle East.Social Superstar straight hours of Lost to make me finally understand what living on purpose is all about. global warming. I figured maybe I was doomed to a world of ego domination. But I think many of us have been mislead to believe that to “be great” you must do great things. So understanding that I will more than likely never be trapped on deserted island and have to play the role of savior to a group of stranded castaways. but I woke up this morning feeling a little different. I would still be stuck in my mind. Living on purpose means getting lost in the moment because there is something greater than your personal desire that needs to be achieved. less “great?” I was at wake this afternoon. The father of my friend’s girlfriend passed away and as I listened to the various eulogies. or maybe it was me seeing something in Dr. to date. none of them have swept me away in inspiration. comparing and contrasting. That is why my South American trip would not have been the escape I was looking for. And because of that.

COM particular time in their life when the deceased impacted their life for the positive. He took days off from work. and acted as a sense of strength for his girlfriend and her mother when the two of them would continually break down. are those who ultimately see the most of life’s bounty. and you get swept away in the emotion of a wake. 158 . great role models.” It's about deciding to be great this very minute. We can be great friends. It's been said over and over again that those who live on purpose and relinquish their personal wants and desires. he had long intense conversations with the dying man. leaders. how clearly something so elusive can suddenly appear. It's about deciding that every action you take from here on out will serve a greater purpose. It's not about waiting for that moment where you can “look like a hero. A few of the speakers had given heartfelt thank you to my friend who had stepped in to pull the family together as it became more and more certain that his girlfriend’s dad was going to lose his battle with cancer. We don’t need our plane to crash in the South Pacific (if that's really where they are) to give us our moments to shine.” It's funny how when you’re running on a few hours sleep. Standing there in the funeral parlor I realized we all have the choice on a daily basis to be great.The Best of TSBMAG. your heads a little messed up from too many episodes of Lost. great listeners. Everyday each one of us is presented with situations where we can be a leader and a hero. One of the speakers quoted a line from "It’s a Wonderful Life" saying “no man is a failure who has friends. Everyone in that room viewed my friend as a hero. and heroes.

These are the artificial indicators of achievement in our society. We addressed integrity in our “The Lost Art of Being a Man” podcast. Their lack of integrity stems from the fact that they hold beautiful women to different standards then they hold the rest of the world. the other part of it was that I was completely impressed with the stories of his unparalleled will and determination. Even after I began to lose interest in baseball I still made an attempt to keep track of his career. We have all most likely been a role where we’ve acted in a way that is not congruent with our core set of values… but watching Roger Clemens at the Congressional hearings yesterday reminded me of the importance of living with integrity. and how it relates to the way you interact with women. is living within a set of core values and beliefs that you set for yourself. I included. Most of us are not above striving for them. But the real depth of your character and what ultimately makes you a man. I was envious of the motivation he possessed that got him out of bed at 4:30 am every morning to work his body to peak performance. The set of values they define for themselves gets pushed aside for the opportunity to be with a beautiful woman. I’m the only guy in NJ who walked around in an Astros hat. I am by no means a perfect person. I religiously followed his career and collected his memorabilia.Social Superstar Integrity Makes a Man Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 02/14/2008 There is more to life than how much money you can make or how many girls you can sleep with. It was to the point where my friends laughed because I changed favorite teams every time he signed a new contract. 159 . It is equally important in how you live your life. Roger Clemens was my favorite sports figure since 1986. The reason women have no respect for “nice guys” is because these nice guys often lack integrity. But integrity goes further than your dealings with the opposite sex. Part of my fascination with him was based on childhood nostalgia.

Period. It is my personal business and I may not feel the need to be completely open. Or doing everything in your power to correct them in the future. I relate it similarly to mistakes I’ve made where I’ve cheated on girls that I loved. Once again. But most of us have defined our core set of values to let these sorts of lies slip by. My definition of living with integrity means owning up to your mistakes. Owning up to a mistake is what separates the men from the boys. has left me with the feeling that the man lacks a sense of integrity. It would have been easier to continue the lies (as OJ showed us deny deny deny) but to me there is a difference between situational lying and lying about something you’ve been accused of. If someone casually asks me how many girls I’ve slept with. The same can be said for Roger Clemens use of steroids.COM That being said Roger Clemens choice to have himself injected with steroids is something I could forgive him for. It is his personal business. I will not deny it. I told them EXACTLY how I felt and why I did it. I may lie as to not appear a slut in that particular situation. and I know full well that I did. But watching Clemens blatantly lying over and over again to save his chances for the Hall and his endorsement deals. I’ve lied to girls and cheated on them. Shit happens. People fuck up. you’ve lied. Human beings make mistakes. While making a mistake is human nature. And if someone casually asked Roger Clemens if he’s ever used steroids I would not condemn him for lying in that situation. But when I eventually got caught I laid all of my cards on the table. If you’ve ever used someone else’s canned routine in the field… you’ve lied. I don’t think any of us are above lying. But if a girl claims to have slept with me. Something at that point of his life (mainly his fierce drive to be the best) made him feel it was necessary to use performance enhancing drugs. It wasn’t always easy. we are human beings. There is a certain shame in these types of lies. It's not something I’m proud of. Because when you deny something you’ve done against 160 . But life is too short for regrets so I move on. If you’ve ever told a girl you were going for a friend's luncheon but really had sex with an Argentine prostitute in back alley brothel….The Best of TSBMAG. Something at that point in time (mainly my dick) made me feel it was necessary to sleep with a woman outside of my relationship.

He is calling numerous people liars. In essence. be a man and move forward. in fact. 161 . and wasting the time of a whole lot of people who would just like to move on from this shit.Social Superstar someone else’s word… you’re. This is where Roger Clemens has crossed the line of simply making a “human mistake” and gone on to show an utter lack of integrity. In every situation in life you have these same two choices: You make excuses. The problem with Clemens choice of action is that the only person he is looking out for is himself. In the face of adversity that Clemens is facing you always have two choices: You can lie and manipulate and play the self serving “if I deny long enough they’ll forget about it” card or you can own up to your mistake. using his wife as a scapegoat. questioning his best friend’s story. take the self serving route. calling them a liar. blame everyone else… or you own up your mistakes and BECOME A MAN.

” She fucked just about every guy I knew.COM The Great Gatsby Complex Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/23/2008 I’ve always said you can learn more from certain novels about human nature than you can from some of the most celebrated self help books. They are usually not ex girlfriends. F. The two fall in love and date for awhile before circumstance prevents the two from continuing their love affair. And discussed the details with me. That was part 162 . Daisy goes on to marry someone else. The Great Gatsby Complex is an inward hope of meeting someone from your past that drives you to make decisions in your present life. For me there are three that pop into my head: Jackie. Jackie was a girl I worked with a few years back. but instead they are usually girls that we have unfinished business with… girls that “slipped away” or circumstance prevented things from going further. He also throws party after party in his mansion in hopes of her showing up without the realization that it was her old lover throwing the party. We clicked on many different levels… and we both were insanely attracted to each other… but Jackie was “on the promiscuous side. and Gatsby spends the next five years building an empire to impress her with his new wealth. The reason that I decided to write about this is because the other night I realized that I still suffer from what I call The Great Gatsby Complex. He is full throttle into “the sickness” over an ex lover Daisy Buchanan. It is the guy who is struggling through law school so that he can show up at his high school reunion and impress a girl he had a crush on ten years ago… it is the guy that is at the gym seven days a week building the perfect body in hope that he runs into an old flame and she’s blown away by his chiseled abs. In the novel. Scott Fitzgerald’s famous novel The Great Gatsby serves to constantly remind me about the art of letting go. We all have those girls from our past that still haunt us.The whore. the main character Jay Gatsby has one of the strongest cases of “oneitis” I’ve ever seen.The Best of TSBMAG.

I met Jaime at her older sister’s birthday party. Jaime was the most adorable girl I had ever seen and soon we were laying on the bed making out… she’s telling me how we’re going to get married… how much she likes me… and I’m enjoying it like I haven’t with any girl in a long time… I resist having sex with her for most of the night despite her constant begging. Later I’m so confused over what I did that I never talk to her again.The 17 year old... She’s the friend that after five years of unbearable sexual tension we explode during a ski trip and spent a week in a hotel barely ever leaving the bed. I mention these girls because they still haunt me. I’ve written about her before.Social Superstar of our friendship… helping each other get laid. Soon I found myself standing on his porch telling her how cute she was… then we kissed. Later that night Jaime came back to a friend's place and we kept talking. I don’t consider myself as having oneitis over any one of them… but I do find myself hoping that they’ll show up at the bar I’m at more often that I’d like to.The soul mate. I do have fantasies of running into one of them and instantly rekindling the old unfinished feelings. We got down the shore and rented a hotel… her friend quickly disappeared and left us alone in the room. until we gradually disappeared from each other’s lives. Kryptonite. We were both in relationships at the time with other people. I had hooked up with her sister in the past and felt a little weird at the party because her sister was there with her boyfriend (who she was with when we had our fun) so to keep myself occupied I flirted with her younger sister Jaime.. I tried to avoid her after (she wasn’t exactly street legal) but a week later she called me up and asked me to go down the shore with her and her friend. I’ve found myself suggesting certain bars to my friends because of the slight chance one of these three 163 . So after that night we went back to being friends. finally I give in... and there was no way I could be caught dating her. Jaime. and when the trip ends -so does our brief romance…and our friendship.. but there was one big problem.. Jackie was a known slut.. The chemistry was so unbelievably hot. We avoided the temptation of hooking up with each other for over a year… until one night we couldn’t take it anymore and dragged each other into a bathroom during a party and made out like our life depended on it. What is so dangerous about The Great Gatsby Complex is that it can begin to control your present moment.

COM might show up there. I think that the reason it's the girls that we have unfinished business with that haunt us the most is because we only have the memories of the intense attraction. I’ve found myself constantly looking around hoping to spot one of them… Holding onto the past like this ruins the opportunities that are presented to you in the present. These feeling never got a chance to mature so they are still burning strong… unlike ex girlfriends who we went full circle with and our feeling had a chance to run their course leaving us with both good and bad memories. I know I made mistakes that might have cost me a chance at a great love affair… but what is done is done. Part of the reason we hold onto these ghosts from our past is because we don’t believe that we’ll meet anyone better. I don’t deny that they hold a special place in my mind… but holding on the past in this way can prevent you from meeting new girls who may have similar qualities. I know some of my actions back then weren’t stemming from my best self. and connection. You have to have faith that she is out there… 164 . You have to know that you have all the qualities and characteristics to meet and attract an even more special girl. The third step of ridding yourself of the complex is the act of forgiveness. They were brief romances that ended prematurely.The Best of TSBMAG. AND THAT'S ALL THEY WERE. Each of the three girls I mentioned added excitement and adventure to my life during the time I knew them. How to Rid Your Self of the Great Gatsby Complex I think the first step in ridding yourself of the complex is the acceptance of all things past for what they were. The second step of ridding yourself of the complex is the expression of gratitude. And I am thankful for that opportunity. The final step of ridding yourself of the complex is the expression of faith. It is time to forgive yourself and move on. Each of these experiences made you the person you are today. Each of these three girls had a quality about them that separated them from the hundreds of other girls I was with during that time frame. chemistry. Any of the three girls I mentioned could easily have been the love of my life… but they weren’t. You have to forgive yourself for anything you did to contribute to ruining the romance.

If you are being held back by ghosts from your pasts I suggest following the four step plan to rid yourself of the complex. 165 .Social Superstar Once you develop a sense of faith that you’ve yet to meet your ideal girl… the chains from your past are released and you begin to grow excited for what you may find in your future.

COM Build it and They will Come Written by Justin B. women will pick up on the very confident and responsible vibe you give off. His wife is skeptical but tells him to follow his vision and build the field. and you build your life up to a point where you feel good about it and. protagonist Ray Kinsella played by Costner is told early in the movie by a mysterious voice “Build it and he will come” as he walks through the cornfield on his large farm. which will easily translate into attracting women. When you are being fulfilled in multiple areas of your life.” If you have seen this excellent movie you know it teaches many life lessons and has some great underlying messages and themes to it. this will attract women. starring Kevin Costner and Ray Liotta.The Best of TSBMAG. let us translate this phrase into “Build it and they will come. ironically.” It is not that they don’t really care. I think you all intuitively understand that what I am saying is that you have to have a strong basis for your self-esteem outside of your success with women and that. some of the deceased ballplayers from the shamed 1919 Chicago White Sox baseball team show up on his field and now he more deeply understands the message that he chose to have faith in: to “build it” and trust that they “will come. After several months. Original Published: -4/03/2008 Build it and They Will Come by Justin B In the very popular and successful 1989 movie Field of Dreams. “have your shit together”. After this. Many men often note that men that seem to land a quantity of quality women into their beds give off a vibe that they “don’t really care.” As a motivational Life Coach I often deal with men that tell me that they have a difficult time attracting and dealing with quality women. I often tell them that one of their main problems I see is that they are too focused on getting women and not focused enough on building their own life and their own self-confidence and self-esteem. though for our purposes is this key phrase “Build it and he will come” and how it can be applied to your own life with women. Kinsella gets a very clear vision of a baseball field in his cornfield and believes deep inside of himself that there is a connection between the “build it” part of what he heard and the vision of the baseball field. What I would like to focus on today. as they say. it is rather that they are so fulfilled and 166 . For our purposes.

While you release endorphins and build your emotional and physical muscles. Men find themselves best when they are happy with their work. because she said that it expresses a sense of confidence and fulfillment that he is strong and that he could “be strong for her. and become passionate about it.” Remember that a personality trait that women often get frustrated with about themselves is the fact that their self-esteem is too much based on what the opposite sex thinks. Being this way will put your much more in touch with your own masculine energy and will make you very appealing.for women. this is your career but if not find something that interests you. 1) Find a cause. his friends.Social Superstar focused on the other parts of their lives that they don’t have a lot of time to worry about how they are doing with women. A woman I was talking with recently told me that it is very sexy for a guy to be very into his job. I am not just saying this for the reason you might be thinking: that women like muscles. you will attract attention with your very masculine vibe. sports. though. If you can identify your core passions and pursue them you will find yourself much more fulfilled in a holistic and overall way. besides women of course.” So how can you apply this philosophy to your life and “build” your own life up to make room for them to “come”? Here are some starting points although by now I am sure you get the idea. or career that you are passionate about. his family. When you lift weights you are going to be getting in touch with and expressing your masculinity even outside of the gym. the last thing that they want is to be with a man that has the same issue. The men who have mastered this principle have inadvertently taught themselves and us a valuable lesson about the connection between their own lives and their success with women: “Build it and they will come. Become charismatic and excited about it. You may even consider it something for women. Women pick up on their vibe of independence and self-fulfillment and this is very attractiveboth emotionally and sexually. purpose. will build your self-confidence because you will slowly get in touch with the negative thoughts that are holding back 167 . etc. 2) Lift weights. 3) Practice meditation or some form of relaxation You may have never considered meditation or consider it something for New Age weirdoes. Hopefully. Learning to meditate.

Then watch how as you “build” your life. See the value in them because you will feel better and therefore will not need women to make you feel good about yourself.The Best of TSBMAG. they will come in droves because you too “will not care. Do not get into the trap of doing these things solely to attract women. 168 . I usually recommend to clients anything by Steven Halpern or Deepak Chopra. As you become more content and build your self confidence at a deep level. “they” will come.” Find a local meditation class or buy a book or CD on meditation.COM your success with women and other areas of your life.

By our ninth month together I desperately wanted to be single again. I became a completely different person. So for the next six months I stayed in a relationship I was miserable in. I had no idea how to break free from her. I think my plan was to treat her so badly she would end it with me. I barely paid attention when she spoke to me. I wasn’t much better. I heard from friends that she actually had to go for counseling. naive to the reality of relationships. The more I hinted that I was looking to end the relationship the more she clung closer to me. And finally she did. I was bitter towards her. Soon the resentment grew to anger. spending every waking hour together. and was dating more and more women. I was a naive boy at the time. But the whole ordeal took a giant toll on the both of us. my girlfriend Jillian and I rushed in full throttle. I got involved in my first serious relationship my freshman year of college. I was now this bitter.Social Superstar Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/29/2008 It was actually Ross Jeffries who originally coined the phrase “Leave them better then you found them. As time went by I became more and more resentful of Jillian. and thought that by ending the relationship with this girl I would break her heart into a million pieces . I found myself falling back into this trap. I denied most of her attempts at sexual activity. I hated the person that I became. this phrase will hold as much importance as anything you’ve been taught before. I was no longer the charming man that won her over. The thrill of this relationship lasted about 6 months.forever ruining her for other men. Little by little I was ruining her. I made her feel small by talking about her insecurities. But later in life when I became better with women. mean. non-sexual. and had the names of our future babies already picked out. 169 .” He was talking about the women that come in and out of your life. After this I avoided relationships altogether for awhile. As you get better with women. I criticized everything she did. Like most young couples. asshole. She was a mess.

as our relationship was very low maintenance. My integrity was all but drained. Nancy was a fun girl who I enjoyed fucking. but I never did. Soon I became the same person I was years earlier with Jillian. The repercussions of the way you treat a woman echoes throughout your life. Kate figured things out on her own and suddenly stopped calling me. I would openly stare at other girls. 170 . I felt like a soulless monster. and it carried over into the rest of my life. Since Kate I have changed my ways.COM I had been dating this girl Kate for like four months. I have realized that it is much less cruel to end a relationship than it is to stay involved with a girl you don’t have feelings for. than I was to string a girl along. and have even fucked from time to time. I was deliberately saying things that I knew would make Kate feel insecure. It was apparent to me that Kate thought things were more serious than they were. She was a bit upset. I avoided sex with her. I felt good about the way things ended with Nancy. Luckily for me. The lesson I learned was that I was much better off being honest with a girl about how I felt. I hated the person I was once again becoming. but was appreciative that I was honest with her. You can’t avoid the pain of a breakup… but by delaying it you can make it much worse. I viewed myself as the kind of guy women should stay away from. I no longer viewed myself as the kind of guy who attracts women. A few months after Kate I started dating a girl Nancy. But I was too lazy to end it.The Best of TSBMAG. The way I felt as a person during those times with Jillian and Kate was less than human. A couple months into the relationship I sensed Nancy was looking for more. and knew it wasn’t going to go anywhere. I wouldn’t call Kate for days at a time. We sat down and had the talk. and my self esteem was shot. I explained that I didn’t want anything more than what we had. I didn’t have that dark cloud surrounding me that I had a few months earlier with Kate. Nancy and I are still friends to this day. She was probably waiting for me to make the apology call.

vomiting. Mack Tight referred to it as when “guys become a needy pile of shit after they become obsessed over a woman. I knew in my head that it was now or never time for making my move. I wanted to create a fresh persona. The first night of the ski trip I made a dramatic change in the way I interacted with her. alluded to her attractiveness. at the very least. Although initially she seemed a little taken back. everything came to a boil on a ski trip. slowly she responded to my escalation. While the only cure for “the sickness” is time… I thought that if I wrote a detailed description of how the sickness infects (using my last battle with it as an example) you guys might be able to keep this as a guide to compare against when you feel it coming on. you may be able to avoid some of the classic mistakes that I made. By the end of the night we were lying on my bed making out. Even as our closest friends tell us to “move on” “play it cool” “forget about her” their words go in one ear and out the other. I became more sexual. but then usually brings about physical symptoms like nausea. But I persisted again that night. We spent the rest of the trip basically locked in my 171 . and distance myself from the friend zone that I had previously been regulated to. depression.” We call it “the sickness” because once it infects you’re almost powerless against its control. insomnia. It happens to the best of us… and even though we most likely know we’ve been infected. and once again she wound up on my bed with me making out. Weeks before the ski trip I began avoiding her before heading up to the mountain. It corrupts your mind first. Justin. Although I won’t pretend that you’ll be able to rid yourself of your obsession. The “sickness” is like oneitis on steroids. The Anatomy of the Sickness After slowly falling for one of my female friends over the course of a year. weight loss.Social Superstar The Anatomy of the Sickness Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/30/2008 Mike. and got more touchy feely. The next day she told me it was a mistake and that she liked me too much as a friend to continue. and I coined the phrase “the sickness” back in college. it is still near impossible to battle.

The first couple nights back home went ok. our strong connection as friends. I fell asleep that night with the phone in my hand. it was like nothing I had experienced before. and then remember our wonderful week together in the mountains and get stuck in my mind trying to figure out what went wrong. Somewhere in between Saturday and Sunday I convinced myself the reason that she’s avoiding me is because she doesn’t trust that I’m really into her. It made sense in my mind. and had arranged for them to be delivered to her 172 . In fact. To be completely honest. My mind was on the girl a bit. I went against my better instinct and called her. I waited and waited… but the response never came. or just my flat out physical attraction to her. The girl and I exchanged evening text messages. And when she didn’t answer I left a message. Although I left the week in the mountains feeling quite vulnerable. She knows I’m a player.” I would momentarily feel better. I bought the biggest baddest most expensive bouquet of flowers they had. still waiting for the call. I would say my confidence was sky high. They all reassured me telling me “it's only been a day. I was fairly confident that she felt the same way. So I went against my better instinct and headed to the flower shop on Monday morning. I was in “play it cool” mode so I figured I would wait a few days to call her. but I wasn’t too worried as she had a habit of flaking throughout our friendship. Saturday morning is when I went into panic mode.The Best of TSBMAG. I began scanning my brain for reasons why she would be blowing me off. Bad!” I expected an immediate response with her echoing the sentiment. I was on top of my game. I began asking the opinion of a few of my friends. I figured that what I needed to do was to prove to her that I was really into her. I don’t know if it was the sexual tension that had built up over the last year. but I was in a state that I had never previously experienced. I had just completed my crowning achievement as a player. After the bar closed I have an after party back at my house. Friday afternoon I could hardly contain my excitement to possibly spend time with her. The realization that she didn’t call set in. I was still in “play it cool” mode so I decided to hit the bar with a couple of my friends.COM bedroom. Quite drunk at this point. While still at work I sent her a text “I want to see you.

I ask her to hang out but she says she’s tired and is just going to sleep. 173 . I try to play it cool and act like I don’t care. get extremely drunk… and take home some 18 year old hostess I worked with.was me completely shit faced handing her a love letter I wrote her… her taking the letter and leaving… never even calling me to acknowledge it. But even a fresh young 18 year old couldn’t deter me from the beginning of “the sickness. When she gets to my house she acts nonchalant about not calling… and I forgive her immediately. She keeps avoiding seeing me. My “wet friend” tells me not to answer the phone and give her a taste of her own medicine… but “dry friend” intervenes and I wind up talking her into coming over. We make out a little while… I eat her pussy. The next morning I debate whether or not to cancel the flowers. tell me how much she’s missed me… and wind up cuddled next to me on my bed. How the night ended. I am plastered but somehow talk her into heading out for a couple drinks with me. As time went by I gave up hope of her calling.. I wait till Friday to call her again. Later in the night I get a call from her thanking me for the flowers.” The next two months are a blur. I decide to still send them. then she leaves. Monday night she calls me at one in the morning. She is almost frightened to see me. I proceed to go out with a friend. They basically consist of me checking my phone every three minutes to see if she called.Social Superstar work Tuesday night… complete with a really embarrassing card basically professing my love. For a minute or two I tell myself I’m not going to call her back… but then I give in and call. The few times she actually does call or text… I am too weak to play the game. Then later in moments of weakness I send her text messages asking “what's going on with us” and other shit I get nauseous thinking about. Finally two months later I get really drunk and show up at her work. Once again… no answer. I’ve finally got her in front of me after two months of playing phone tag… but it's nothing like I imagined.. In my mind… she was going to confess her love to me.

174 . He was dating a new girl… finally starting to get over “the sickness.The Best of TSBMAG. I knew that there would be an annual Christmas party at the place she worked. Finally the rest of the party breaks up the fight… they put me in a cab and send my sad sick drunk ass home. I began asking her questions alluding to “the weekend we spent together. I’m going to leave this story without commentary. and never would imagine her to be into him… but as I got drunker it made more and more sense. I didn’t feel threatened because I knew the guy. Then I began noticing that she and one of her co-workers were awfully close. So once again. It is simply meant to show how the sickness can take hold of anyone. So I did the only thing a drunken sick bastard could do… I followed him into the bathroom and punched him square in his jaw.. Bobby Rio woke up the next morning at Rock Bottom.” But I couldn’t leave well enough alone.” It was clear she didn’t want to talk about it. The night started out pleasant enough… I spent time catching up with a handful of old friends… chatting with her whenever the occasion would allow. I had friends that still worked there. I think I may have even bit him.. I go out get completely shit faced and show up at her work party with one of my friends. The next thing I know we’re ushered out to the parking lot… We’re rolling on the pavement pounding on each other’s skulls… sticking fingers in our eyes. At that point in my life I already knew everything there was too know.. But as I got drunker the cool guy shell I had been putting on was slowly cracking.. always the one with the control and calling the shots… And I fell like a toy soldier.COM The mess that Bobby Rio had become was finally starting to put the pieces of his life back together. I was banging chicks left and right. Everything was becoming crystal clear… (In my drunken distorted mind) SHE WAS FUCKING THIS GUY.

everything. The greatest pickup artists in the world usually have a passion in their life greater than seducing women. While improving areas of your non verbal communication may make you look and feel like a more passionate person. for Neil Strauss it's his love of journalism. At first I tried to artificially create a sense of passion in my life. Bobby Rio’s passion in life is traveling the world. and voice tonality to present a passionate looking man to the world. I didn’t truly grasp the concept of living with passion. and is an excellent place to start… ultimately you still won’t be living with passion. Argentina for a couple weeks to visit a friend. for Extramask its comedy… What living with a higher passion does for each of these PUAs is it gives them a reason to exist other than picking up women. That trip ignited a passion in me that burns strongly to this day. something that gives meaning to their existence.Social Superstar Living with Passion Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 05/19/2008 The first time I heard that phrase it was from an Anthony Robbins CD. And as Sebastian Drake talked about in our recent interview with him. improving these things will create a sense of “passive value” for you… and eventually you might even begin to feel a bit more passionate in your day to day activities. It gives them something to strive for. My desire to see the world is stronger than my desire for any girl or to 175 . For Mystery it is his love of magic and showmanship. “what does living with passion have to do with improving my skills at attracting women?” My answer is. It gives them something fascinating to talk to about. although I found it motivating. Six years ago I headed down to Buenos Aires. At the time. for Christian Hudson its entrepreneurship. for Cajun and Mehow its theatre. I used body language. It gives them something to get excited about every morning. You may be asking. physiology. for Tyler Durden its adventure.

” Discovering and cultivating your passion is an area that we are going to discuss in much more detail during our Mansformation Weekend Retreat. ironically. In fact. My happiness is never defined by how many notches I’ve added to my belt. How this relates to pickup and seduction Since no one can ever take my love of travel away from me… I never attach excess meaning to winning or losing with a particular girl. and that. 176 . “If money wasn’t an issue. this will attract women. what would I be doing with my life?” Really taking time to think about this question will begin to give you a deeper understanding into what internally drives you. I think that the first step in cultivating your passion is to ask yourself.COM make any amount of money. “this will help you have a strong basis for your self-esteem outside of your success with women. it defines a lot of my criteria for jobs and relationships. I live with a willingness to walk away from any girl… And like Life Coach Justin says in his Build it and they will Come article. I will never work a job that does not give me the flexibility to travel often (2 weeks vacation a year won’t cut it) nor will I date a girl who won’t just get up and go on a wild adventure with me.The Best of TSBMAG.

the further along you seem to fall into it. And other times we go through a health slump where we seem to just entirely let ourselves go. The most frustrating thing about slumps is that more you try to get out of one. The trick is to gradually build momentum based on small accomplishments.000 credit card debt… just focus on paying off $25 a month. Sometimes we get in a financial slump where we just can’t get caught up on bills. Once you’ve got in the habit of taking a walk every night. Focus on One Goal. If you’re dreading putting seven days a week in at the gym. For instance. This prevents people from making any effort at all to interact with new people. Start Small. It is impossible to stay energized and 177 .instead commit to taking one long walk around your block every night. Here are 7 Ways to Motivate You Out of a Slump 1. We all go through them. Instead of focusing on building a relationship. And then when we try to get back on track. Once you’re no longer missing the $25 a month… start saving $35. the mere thought of the time and energy involved in starting a relationship can scare the crap out of you. If you want to get your finances in order don’t dwell on how you’re going to pay off that $15. Use Small Successes to Build Momentum. 3. Now that you’ve been talking to two new people a day for a week… challenge yourself a bit and start flirting with those two new people.Social Superstar 7 Secrets for Getting out of a Slump Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/25/2008 Slumps are a part of human nature. Effectively removing yourself from a slump can be a struggle. if you’ve been single for a long time. One of the biggest obstacles people face in overcoming slumps is they become intimidated by the task at hand. focus on just talking to a couple new people a day. Other times we go through a dating slump (draught) where it seems like we’ll never kiss a girl again. 2. we can’t figure out where to even start. but with the right motivation you can get right back on track in no time. do a few crunches when you get home from it. Many times the reasons we fall into slumps is because we’ve so over whelmed by everything going on in our life that we choose to negate it all. Once you’ve started small you should be able to develop a new routine.

7. Write your goal on an index card and put it in your pocket. hang around guys who have already improved that area. When you read over your goal make sure you’re visualizing yourself as having achieved it.COM focused on improving too many areas at once. It’s quite possible that you’ll find the mere habit of working out daily will motivate you to meet more people and get your finances in order. everywhere you go. In the time where you’re motivation is lacking. read the hundreds of stories of guys who were 30 year old virgins who went on to date some of the most beautiful women in the world. Find someone who will push you through the rough times. Every day. If you’re looking to get into better shape find a good workout buddy. that goal will be right beside you. Realize Motivation Comes and Goes. These are not the kind of people you want to associate yourself with. Motivation comes and goes. And when that gust dies down… to know that it will arrive again shortly. And ask for advice… Or hang out with guys in the process of changing themselves as well. If you’re goal is to get better talking to women. It is pretty hard to accomplish something completely on your own. It is much better to just pick one goal that you are committed to achieving right away.The Best of TSBMAG. 6. I find its best to let a few select people in on your planned outcome… and ask for their help in achieving it. 4. If you’re not having luck meeting a significant other. The point is you need to continually inspire yourself and at the same time remind yourself that it is completely possible. Get Inspired. You really need to avoid the people in your life who bring about a negative influence. its best to spend that time 178 . and broke… pick the goal that you think will be the best catalyst for improving the other areas later on. out of shape. If you’re piss poor and think it’s impossible to change your situation read blogs and books from people who were in similar financial states and gone on to make millions. The trick is that when you’re feeling that gust of motivation to ride it out as long as possible. You’re not always going to be 100% motivated. When you find yourself losing focus or motivation… pull out the index card and reread your goal. Find some Good Wingmen and Avoid the Negative. Carry your Goal Around With You. If you’re lonely. There are some people out there who just don’t like seeing other people succeed. 5. Stare at it and visualize it for however long it takes to snap you back into the right frame of mind.

and talking to your wingmen.Social Superstar reading up on your goals. This will prevent you from falling back into the slump. 179 . revising your plan.

The Best of TSBMAG. He does this knowing that journalists around the country are going to talk about it. and fans are going to discuss it. Can you imagine any more possible pressure? My point is you’re not good or bad based on one experience. Once he realizes what action causes the frustration he can move on.000 people live. teammates. Maybe he is swinging for fences instead of just trying to make contact. He is as good as he is because he is able to acknowledge the emotion of disappointment or frustration. He then looks for the lesson that was offered from the situation. In fact. He can move on because he knows that in the past he’s overcome slumps. I think we would all agree he must have rock solid inner game. If every time he went up to the plate he reminded himself how much pressure was on him… how would he ever possibly hit the ball? If every time he struck out or grounded into a double play he dwelled in the emotion of frustration or disappointment… how would he ever gather the courage to walk back up to the plate. He does this in front of 50. and millions of people watching on television. and owners are going to share their opinion on it. and the manager. Once he 180 . maybe he took his eye off the ball for a split second too long.COM Can You Control Your Emotions Like Arod? Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 Inner game is not about succeeding every time. Or even a collection of experiences. Alex Rodriguez is as good as he is because he is able to learn to master his emotions. In order to be as good a baseball player as Alex Rodriguez. there are times the bases are loaded. or maybe the pitcher was just having a damn good day. Alex Rodriguez does not get a hit every time he goes up to the plate. So there is no reason he can’t overcome them in the future. the game is on the line… and he strikes out.

Chances are you don’t face anywhere near the kind of pressure Arod does. The only wraths you face are your emotions. or scoring home runs. This mean you can play the game and have as much fun with it as possible. You don’t face the wrath of millions of fans. he goes and works with the hitting coach to fix the flaw in his artillery. 181 . disappointed teammates.Social Superstar knows that he is certain of his ability to overcome it again. No one is paying attention to whether you’re striking out every night. If you learn to control them… you’re on your way to inner game. an angry manager. and pessimistic critics.

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Going Down in Flames
Written by Alex Strandberg Original Published: 07/03/2008

We all care way too much what a complete stranger that knows nothing about us thinks. Fear of rejection is the underlying emotion in most approaches. The thought of a beautiful woman sitting there and calling you a loser in front of the entire club makes most guys stomachs turn in knots. Sort or ironically, being rejected will bring the most success with women into your life. Let me explain Internally most guys think that they are complete lonely losers that no one could love. They greatly fear that women will find this out and have no desire for them. They learn all these cool lines and tricks but that fear of being thought of as a loser by women and confirming their already held beliefs is still strong. It carries so much weight that it cripples them from being comfortable in interactions or EVEN APPROACHING WOMEN. They try their hardest to avoid getting “rejected” in order to avoid facing their own belief system. They try their very best to do everything “right "and LOOK COOL but by the very act of trying they are doing everything wrong. From this they place way too much importance on getting a good re-action from the girl and becoming very outcome dependent and needy. If the interaction goes well they get a false sense of self esteem from the girl and feel good. If it goes badly then that fear of actually being a loser is triggered and they feel terrible. When you are outcome dependent you become very attached to what the girl thinks of you. This just breeds of insecurity and neediness which if you hadn’t guessed is a HUGE TURN OFF for women. Women are attracted to men who could take or leave any woman. Not caring whether the woman comes, stays, lays or prays seems very counter intuitive but it's what will get you the “best” results and lead to a happier and more peaceful life.


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In addition to this fear of being rejected is a fear of the unknown. If you are just starting out in approaching or have done a couple of approaches the fear of the unknown is still lingering in the background. This fear makes your mind race at a hundred miles per hour with a million Questions: “what if she pours a drink on me?” “What if she rejects me and all the people in the club laugh at me and I am humiliated?” “What if this happens?” “What if that happens?” And so on. The only way around fear of the unknown is to go straight through it and become comfortable with ambiguity of approaching and life. When you get rejected badly and the initial sting wears down you will find it hilarious how some girls will treat a complete stranger who was just saying Hi to them and being friendly. Part of the reason why they felt the need to reject you badly is how annoyed they are at being hit on all day by guys who haven’t a clue. Another part of it is the pleasure they get from rejecting guys. They love the feeling of having the power to control another person's state of emotions through their own actions. One of the biggest fears that guys carry around with them is a fear of going back to who they were before they learned of the seduction community or any self help stuff. They remember how they felt before knowing any better, the loneliness, the feeling or being powerless and useless in driving the direction of their own lives. Guy’s develop a debilitating fear of being rejected because they fear that they will go back to who they were in the past. As a result, they avoid rejection at all costs. My suggestion: Go out with the intention of getting rejected HARD. Like any fear, the only way around it is to go through it. Getting rejected, laughed at, drink thrown in face is NOT A BIG DEAL. It’s not a big deal but you need to go through harsh and “embarrassing” rejection in order to realize that it doesn’t matter what some anorexic club ho who has NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE thinks of you. Hypnotica walked around for two months unshowered, unshaven, in a dress with a dildo strapped to his head in order to get over caring about what other people think. This is a great thing to do but it’s not very practical to people with jobs and obligations. Alternatively, you can go out as many times as needed with the intention of getting rejected.

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Here are a couple of things you can do to go down in flames: -Go up to a girl or a group of girls and ask them “hey, do you like salads? I like croutons that come with salads” It’s a very stupid and ridiculous question to ask to girls in a club but it will help you get over trying to look cool and caring what they think of you. -Go up to a girl and in a suave and cheesy way say “Daddy’s home” but try not to crack up laughing before you deliver the line. After you say these two things or make up your own, DON’T try and recover and get the girl-just make the approach as bad as you can possibly make it. You might feel uneasy and dumb saying these things but those feelings will eventually go away. Each time you get rejected badly you will get closer and closer to not giving a shit what other people think about you and you will stop caring about the outcome of the situation. Releasing attachment and concern for other’s opinion of you will GREATLY improve your success with women and all other areas of your life. After a while you will actually begin to enjoy being rejected because of how funny it will become to you. Your skin will be so thick that nothing she does will be any concern of yours. It will no longer send you down a spiral of depression and completely ruin your night. I’m sort of sadistic in nature; I’m not sure what I enjoy more, being rejected badly or getting the girl. I’m leaning towards to former because getting the girl is enjoyable but getting rejected harshly in a hilarious way is damn entertaining. -Alex


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Bust Through Your Comfort Zone
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/08/2008

I´m sitting here at an outdoor internet cafe in Medellin, Colombia staring at the beautiful city surrounded by mountains, and all I can think is ¨just three years ago I used to shit myself at the thought of vacationing to Colombia.¨ I would literally freeze up imagining myself alone in Colombia. I had visions of corrupt police, rampant drug wars, kidnappings, violence, and theft. Although I had visited Brazil and Argentina on several occasions, Colombia was on a short list of places that I was too scared to venture. Well, all it took was the persuasion of one hot Colombian girl, and here I am. It's my third day here and I feel this incredible weight lifted off of my shoulders. I have always prided myself in my sense of adventure... and I cringed at the thought that there were places I was avoiding out of fear. Well, I broke through my fear... only to find that they were completely unwarranted. Yes, completely unwarranted. Like most of our fears. I´ve been giving a lot of thought about what contributes to that stealth inner game that some guys seem to have. I´ve actually been building a list of traits and actions we can make our own to slowly reach that unstoppable confidence we all want. And on that list is: THE DRIVE AND ABILITY TO BREAK THROUGH OUR COMFORT ZONES We all have comfort zones. We are comfortable with a certain group of friends. We are comfortable at certain bars and clubs. We are comfortable dating a certain scale of girls. We are comfortable performing a certain type of job. We are comfortable making a certain income... But what I´ve come to realize is that the truly confident and successful people rarely stay in their comfort zone long. Confident, successful people are always looking to push and challenge themselves. They are

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always on the lookout for new opportunities that will inspire them to be an even better person. The main reason that most of us stay in our comfort zone is fear. Sure, we will claim to really like hooking up with chubby girls. Or really love that townie bar around the corner from our house.... but what we are really saying is ¨We are not willing to take the risk to find out if something better exists.¨ But the fact remains: Something better does exist. But we won´t ever attain it if we aren´t willing to sacrifice comfort for a little while. Here is my advice: Take Action Make a list of people, places, and actions that are a part of your comfort zone. Do you go to the same hair stylist because you love their haircut, or are you afraid to try someone else? Do you find yourself heading to the same bar? Buying the same polo t-shirts? Hitting on the same scale of girls? Going for the same type of job? Make a list of everything that falls within your comfort zone. Once you´ve created a list of things that make up your comfort zone; make another list. This is your Action List. On this list write down one step you can take towards breaking out of your comfort zone. Write the name of a bar you´ve always wanted to check out. Write the image change you´ve been dying to make. Write down the job you´ve always wanted to apply for. Now look at that list. And do everything on it. You want unstoppable inner game? Then do it. Do it.


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10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/06/2008

You want to see immediate results? You want to start getting more phone numbers, more looks, more compliments? Then implement these simple ten steps now and you’ll have more dates than you can handle. Tip #1- Improve your Posture Most people don’t realize the importance of posture. But it says more about you than anything that comes out of your mouth. Bad posture can make you look bored, depressed, or just plain homely. Improving your posture starts with becoming aware of it. Just being aware of excessive slouching will force you to take action right then. Toning your muscles through exercise will also help enhance posture. Place your head squarely on top of your neck, make sure your shoulders are upright and your back is arched forward. This will make you appear taller and more confident. Be sure to leave your arms relaxed and loose. A great way to improve posture is to remain active throughout the day. This will prevent your body from being molded the wrong way. Tip #2- Smile A smile can literally light up a room. A man or woman who walks around flashing a smile will always be perceived to be more attractive. With a healthy smile, we are able to transmit the emotions within our hearts. It is very true that our smile reflects our mood, personality and even our inner health. Smiling makes you seem warmer, more inviting, confident, happy… but the best part is that a great smile can make someone else feel all of these same emotions and attach them to you. The best way to improve your smile is by practicing in front of a mirror. Make sure that what you're intending as a smile isn’t coming off as a smirk. Also pay attention to your teeth. Nice teeth are a cornerstone of a good smile. If you’re teeth are yellow consider getting them whitened. It is also important to stay on top of dentist visits. Tip #3- Tanning

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Don’t misunderstand this tip as a call for you to turn yourself into an orange oompa loompa. Orange skin is not attractive. But some healthy looking color can benefit anyone, especially in the winter time when our complexions tend to get pale. I would generally recommend tanning a few times a month. I usually go just enough to have color, but not so much that people can recognize that I’ve been tanning. Tan skin makes you look thinner, healthier, and tends to make your clothes look better against your skin. It also helps hide imperfections in your complexion. Tip #4- Be Flirtatious Someone who knows how to flirt effectively will always attract more of the opposite sex than someone who solely relies on their looks. Flirting is an art form that if you can master you will be a few steps ahead of the competition. Flirting is essential in creating sexual tension. They key to flirting is achieving a sense of relaxed playfulness. Teasing is a great way to flirt. As is competitive flirting which takes the form of slight sarcasm and dry wit. Cooperative flirting is different. Rather than jabbing her, you pull her into your reality and create an “us against the world” dynamic. Flirting is a mix of pushing away with words and pulling in with actions. In the game of flirting think back to how you acted towards that classmate you had a crush on in the fourth grade… and act the same exact way. Tip #5- Get an Expensive Haircut The haircut needs to be great. It is very easy to go the cheap route when it comes to getting your haircut and head to the local Supercuts. This won’t cut it if your goal is to immediately make yourself more attractive. The key here is going to a salon that has a great reputation. These salons will usually cost you much more than your local barber… but it's worth it. Movie stars look like movie stars because they have the best that money can by making them look that way. Even if it is only a one time deal you deserve to get a “movie star” haircut. Stylists at these salons know how to shape a haircut around your particular face, head size, and personal style. There will be a huge difference. Even if you can’t afford to

and inappropriate body hair. You can usually find dance lessons locally.Social Superstar continually get your hair cut at these more expensive salons. Eliminating a unibrow alone can change the look of your face. the more attractive the company you keep. Tip #8. thus increasing their perceived attraction. cleaning wax out of your ears. Therefore. On the other end if you’re an above average looking person but you hang out with the local riff raft people will look for your negative qualities to explain why you’re slumming. facial hair (especially if you’re a girl). We tend to look for reasons that will support our reality. Tip #7. If you are not a naturally good dancer I would recommend taking some dance lessons. And pluck your eye brows. The lessons are usually available in group form and individual form. I would usually recommend taking a few individual lessons before you jump into the 189 . The same can be said for an average looking guy who walks into a bar with a beautiful woman… everyone in the bar will look for his positive qualities to reason it. acne. A good dancer is immediately perceived to be more sexual. the more attractive you will be perceived to be. at least you can take some pictures of yourself and plaster your MySpace profile with them! Tip #6. So if we see an average looking girl hanging around a bunch of models we will tend to look for her better qualities to justify her being there. Others actions that you can take is cutting your nails. The first is getting rid of all unwanted hair. It is much easier to let others guide us.Hang Around Attractive People Humans look for short cuts when it comes to forming their own opinions.Learn how to Dance If you want to attract the attention of the opposite sex during a night on the town you should consider learning how to dance. And one of the easiest ways to do this is to lump you in with the company you keep. controlling dandruff. People like to make opinions quickly. or other skin conditions. ear hair.Stay Well Kept and Well Groomed There are grooming tips that you can implement immediately that will drastically increase your attractiveness. This includes nose hair.

Good use of accessories will make you more noticeable in a crowd.The Best of TSBMAG. hats. earrings. It is the sense that provokes the most intense emotions. and that you are confident in your ability to pull off wearing these things. the better you smell. Ideally you can have several different men or women give you their opinions on which one is the best. Tip #10.Add Accessories to your Wardrobe If you take notice of most celebrities the one thing you’ll find in common with all of them is that they all make use of accessories. necklaces. the more attractive you will be appear to the opposite sex. bracelets. While you may not choose to go that extreme.Smell Good Smell is one of the brain’s strongest senses. There is a term called “peacocking” which means purposely dressing in a way to draw attention to you. There is a theory that pheromones play a huge part in sexual attraction and I would not argue with that at all. One thing is for certain. Although taste is subjective. My recommendation is to sample a few different brands and ask a member of the opposite sex to judge. Adding these things to an outfit shows that you put thought into the way you look. Too much of a good thing can be a turn off. Tip #9. Accessories include belts. And can spark animal like sexual attraction. watches. It may cost a few dollars but you will be amazed to see what kind of response you get next time you're asked out onto the dance floor. you should seriously consider added some flash to your look. Once you purchase a fragrance make sure you put just the right amount of it on. Accessories are items you can add to your outfit to give you some added flash. the purchase of a good cologne or perfume is a great investment. and scarves. 190 . glasses.COM group classes.

Proper Nutrition: I think a problem many people have is that once they start working out and burning calories they look at it as a free pass 191 . Nothing beats jogging or running. the elliptical. For me though. efficient. Here are three tips that I’ve found helpful during the times in my life that I’ve reached my desired outcome. 1.Social Superstar 3 Tips for Abs of Steel Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/19/2008 Abs are like a prized possession. although they looked SWEET! Unfortunately I let myself go over the last year… and we all know that while abs take awhile to build. Cardio. they disappear in an instant. and effective method of burning calories. or biking should be enough to get the process in gear. But sometimes it's good to remember how basic it can be to get what we want… with the proper discipline. 2.. the periods in my life where I’ve had abs… have always been more about the sense of personal accomplishment then about how they looked…. and Cardio: You can do a million crunches a day… but if you’ve got a solid layer of fat covering your abs you’ll never see them. These are no secrets… Because there is no short cut. It is the most intense. What makes abs so desirable is that most people aren’t willing to put in the effort it takes to get them. which in turn bring up the value of anyone who takes off their shirt to display a six pack. Swimming. and taking aerobics classes are beneficial as well. hiking. It will take a minimum of three to four days a week of intense cardio to burn the amount of calories needed to shed fat around your gut. What people fail to realize is that the cardio needs to be intense.. Everyone knows that the trick to getting rid of fat is cardio. They seem almost elusive at times. 20 minutes on the treadmill while reading a magazine and chatting on the phone won’t cut it. Cardio. the Stairmaster. This makes people fascinated with them. jumping rope. Three to four sessions a week of intense jogging. running.

You need resistance to properly strengthen and build them. The same goes for abdominals. If you want proper abs development.Grab a dumbbell. 192 . Abs are muscles just like biceps. you are not using the abs very much if you do. you’ll never get to the point where you’re body starts converting fat into energy. Drink at least a gallon of clean water each day as well. carbs moderate (40%). you need to create enough resistance where your abs are forced to work. It will help in nutrient absorption and digestion and will help flush toxins from the body. Cable Rope Crunches . under your chin. I seriously know girls who finish their workouts and head to Hagen Daz for a Sundae. then back up. pecs. hold for a couple seconds. and fats minimal (10%). and glutes.Grab the triceps rope. You are now using your abs more to work against the leverage the dumbbell has created. 30 degree contraction until you feel the abs contract. triceps. Working out Your Abs: The biggest mistake that most people make when trying to build abdominal muscle is that they do sets of crunches or sit ups without any resistance. and bend downwards. Don’t swing with the hips. If you’re filling yourself up with shitty foods. Just a slight. But it is important to get something in you. or let it lie on your upper chest.COM to pig out. You should keep protein intake high (approximately 50% of daily calories). Remember. only. It’s basically a crunch. but no more. Not eating on time or at all is almost as bad as eating too much.The Best of TSBMAG. The whole point of spending all that time burning calories is to start burning the excess fat. forcefully contracting your abs on the way down. Would you work your biceps out with no resistance? Or your chest? Here’s an important key. you are on your knees. you need to add resistance (weight) to your abs exercises. either hold it in front of your face. But the contraction is the same. Stick with a heavy enough weight where you can handle 10-15 reps. The Five Best Abs Exercises Weighted Crunches . kneel on your knees. and perform regular crunches.

Wrap your feet around a small dumbbell. If at the same time you’re eating healthy and burning calories you should be seeing results in a couple months. with your hands tucked under your butt. do not swing all the way down. just far enough (30 degrees) to fully contract the abs.Lie flat on your back. Seated Abs Machine . Start with your feet about 6 inches from the ground. then raise them about 12-16 inches from the ground and then back down slowly. and perform leg raises. As you can see doing these exercises while adding some resistance will build muscle much quicker and in larger gains. A couple months of intense workouts are a small price to pay for abs of has a really great free personal trainer course that will set you in the right direction. 193 . If you’re unsure of proper nutrition or just need a good plan to follow Bodybuilding.Once again. They are effective at strengthening your core region. which is your abs and lower back. This is very similar to Cable rope crunches. hold for a couple seconds.Working on the stability ball will incorporate balance into your abdominal work. Stability Ball Crunches . These can be done on the end of a bench as well.Social Superstar Weighted Leg Raises . then back up.

Shit I hate the taste of booze. wobbly. Yea… you’re game tends to be a little tighter when you’re not red faced. We can argue semantics… but I’ll just say you’ll never see Bobby Rio clinging to a club soda. or bottom shelf tequila drowned in sour mix… but you look cheap drinking 194 .The Best of TSBMAG. do you? I mean all of my most memorable nights have involved me waking up. If I drank alone I’d probably be sipping Bay Breezes or some kind of Dairies. “what the hell happened last night?” So the real question isn’t should you or shouldn’t you drink when you hit the bars… the real question is what kind of drink will best serve your purpose. These plastic cup drinks are usually reserved for the drink special of the night. Never order anything they are going to serve you in a plastic cup. looking at the girl next to me and thinking. No. You know… the $1 Miller Light draft or the $3 Margarita. Your drink always serves two purposes: to get you hammered. You tend to find this atrocity at bars that are near college campuses. You don’t think I actually enjoy the endless rounds of SoCo and lime shots I guzzle down. The rules bend a little depending on the location… but certain ones are set in stone. or the unnecessary twelve packs I always grab for the after party.COM A Manly Guide to Choosing Your Drink Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 There is a dirty rumor in the pick-up community claiming it is better to stay sober when gaming women in bars and clubs. These drinks not only taste like shit as they’re usually stale beer. and to make you look cool in the process. and slurring your words… but you don’t have as much fun. these are all part of the show. maybe a Pina Coloda… but there are certain rules you need to follow in social environments.

195 . or Kamikaze is off limits. Anything ordered on the rocks looks cool. Malibu Bay Breeze. Never. and they drank scotch on the rocks. I would pay extra to have them pour it in a pint glass. Because someone is going to hear you order it. Never order anything frozen or served in a novelty glass with a funny straw… unless you’re sitting on a beach in the Caribbean. Never. In fact it says that your life sucks so bad that trolling around this shitty bar is actually an “event” for you. Remember clear or brown… I don’t care how much you liked the Big Lebowski it’s never acceptable to order a White Russian. Let’s face it. Sex on the Beach. There will be times when you freeze like a deer in headlights when the bartender asks “what you drinking. men were men. rusty nail… they didn’t ruin the integrity of their vodka by splashing cranberry juice in it.” Generally. even if I planned on drinking Miller anyway. Back in his day.” Your first reaction may be to spit out “Michelob Ultra” but you need to regroup and imagine what your grandfather would have ordered. Buttery Nipple. Rocks glasses are cool. A safe bet is to order something your grandfather would have drank. anything with a novelty name like Alabama Slammer. You think this one would be self explanatory but I never fail to see some schlep slurping on Mudslide wondering why he hasn’t been laid in a year. And I don’t care how good you think it taste… you are never ever to order a Cosmo. or inevitably some girl will ask you what you’re drinking. The name of the drink is more important than what is inside it. The only exception to this rule is ordering a Margarita at a Mexican joint. rye and coke. Drinking one of the “vacation” drinks sends out the vibe that you don’t get out often. Manhattan. What does it say to everyone that you will sacrifice the enjoyment of your drink to save a buck? Hell.Social Superstar them. and you don’t want to have to respond “Fuzzy Navel. It doesn’t much matter what’s in the glass so long as it’s clear or brown.

The Best of TSBMAG. But you must look cool in the process. 196 .COM So remember it is quite alright to get a little sauced when you hit the bars… in fact I even encourage it.

Obviously the major reason being that the increase in testosterone most anabolic steroids produce causes extraordinary gains in muscle mass. In addition to the gains in muscle mass many guys become addicted to the adrenaline rush of having excess testosterone flowing through their veins. Not only are steroids an expensive habit. and even a slight increase in its level will provide many amazing benefits. Here’s the biology behind testosterone: 197 . Taking steroids is a coward’s way out that leads nowhere fast. I’ve seen many of my friends succumb to the lure of steroids. While they would tell themselves it was going to be only one time… soon they became reliant on them and were doing cycle after cycle. To put it bluntly. Benefits of increased testosterone’ * Increase in strength and muscle size * Body fat decrease * Increased sex drive and endurance * More energized and motivated * Decrease in bad cholesterol * Makes you more attractive to women Increasing testosterone can be a huge benefit to you. I’m going to give you tips to naturally increase your testosterone. Testosterone is the most important muscle building hormone in your body. Instead of cheating and doing it the artificial way that will drain your wallet and health. This is not to say that your body couldn’t benefit from extra testosterone. the side effects can be brutal in the short term… and deadly in the long term.Social Superstar 7 Steps to aturally Boost Testosterone Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/09/2008 There seems to be a huge fascination with guys taking steroids lately.

COM First. Eliminate Binge Drinking. Exercises that put your muscles under the most amount of stress will force your body to produce more testosterone. and canola are a proven natural way to boost testosterone. Soy has been known to raise estrogen levels which decrease testosterone levels. and turnips. You can also reduce estrogen by limiting the amount of soy protein you take in. avocadoes. 198 . the adrenal glands release DHEA into the bloodstream. or “LH” for short. True gains in muscle and testosterone come when you push yourself to the limit at the gym. dead lifts. If you follow these 7 steps you can avoid having to resort to sticking needles in your ass a couple days a week. Cortisol is a catabolic hormone that will cause testosterone to plummet. and attractive. Limit Cortisol production. and military presses. flaxseed. Increase consumption of Essential Fatty Acids. Push yourself 110% at the gym. LH and DHEA then travel together to the testes where testosterone production begins. Excessive alcohol consumption can drastically reduce testosterone levels. LH basically “tells” the body to start producing testosterone.The Best of TSBMAG. 2. bench presses. Sexual stimulation causes the body to increase the production of oxytocin which increases endorphin production (the “feelgood” chemical). 1. lunges. It is also produced during times of lack of sleep. sexual. Have more sex. 5. radishes. dips. 4. You can reduce estrogen by eating more cruciferous vegetables like broccoli. cauliflower. cabbage. vibrant. Once this occurs. Fill your work out with compound exercises. Cortisol is produced during times of high stress or anxiety. Testosterone can now be released into the bloodstream to perform its magic. Reduce Estrogen levels. These exercises include squats. Reducing the levels of estrogen (the main female hormone) will greatly increase your testosterone. and this also raises testosterone. 3. fish. These 7 steps will provide that natural boost in testosterone that will leave you feeling more healthy. The EFAs found in peanuts. It is best to keep your drinking to a minimum and try not to exceed more than three drinks in a night. olives. 6. the brain releases a substance called Luteinizing Hormone. 7.

Energy is the fuel we all run on. Everything listed below will increase your energy level for the long term. I was exhausted this morning. Nutrition. and it took me another hour to wind down enough to sleep. Make sure you consume complex carbohydrates and not just simple carbohydrates. jolt of energy I decided to do some research into how I can naturally increase my energy level. 5 Ways to Naturally Increase Your Energy As easy as it seems to pop a Stacker 3. 199 . soda. Needless to say. but short lived. Without it we are virtually useless.Social Superstar How to aturally Increase Energy Levels Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/16/2008 Last night I took my girl to the Bon Jovi concert at MSG. Make sure you get enough fruits. We got home extremely late. but over time you’ll slowly find you no longer need to flood your body with caffeine. Examples of simple carbohydrates would be candy. whole grain rice or even apples. After struggling to find the motivation to begin writing … I decided to hit 7-11 for my second Red Bull of the day. Continuously feed your body small amounts of complex carbohydrates to get the most out of your diet. down a Red Bull. cake and table sugar. You’ll simply get fat and become lazier than before. Don’t feed your body junk. The carbs that you should be taking into your body should be complex carbohydrates such as whole grain bread. After guzzling the Red Bull and feeling that instant. You might not get that instant gratification that a Red Bull will give you. Think about how much more you would accomplish in life if you had an endless supply of energy. proteins and complex carbohydrates in your everyday diet. 1. or hit Dunkin Donuts for your fourth cup of coffee… these are all temporary fixes that will leave you even more depleted in the long run. Simple carbohydrates create a short burst of energy that will simply wear off and leave you depressed. vegetables.

Conditioning takes place through daily exercise. If you live an exceptionally active life style you might want to supplement with an additional B complex. 3. I actually went through a period of about six months where I had completely given up caffeine and replaced morning coffee with a homemade juice.COM In addition to proper diet you should be taking a multi vitamin every day. The B vitamins act as coenzymes. Another great way to get bursts of nutrients that your body needs is by using a juicer. joining in a game of basketball or ultimate Frisbee. to better transport oxygen throughout the body. Get the right amount of sleep Everyone’s body is different. Modern diets are usually void of many of the key vitamins and minerals our bodies need. but it truly works wonders for energy.The Best of TSBMAG. The enzyme then acts as a catalyst in the chemical reactions that transfer energy from the basic food elements to the body. I would advice picking up a decent juicer along with a book on good juicing recipes. It includes: * Strengthening the muscles involved in respiration in order to better move oxygen in and out of the lungs. The fact is. Even if you hate the idea of spending time in the gym. Conditioning Conditioning is your efficiency to move oxygen and blood to needed parts of the body. What most people fail to realize is that even though you’ve 200 . most of us don’t exercise nearly as much as we should be. compounds that unite with a protein component called an apoenzyme to form an active enzyme. 2. or just taking a morning power walk around the park. you can be taking a jog at the track. * Working the body’s muscles which support healthy circulation and blood pressure. but on average we need about 7-8 hours of sleep a night. It gets messy and expensive. * Increases the number of red blood cells in the body. By taking a daily multi vitamin you can be sure you’ll be getting the daily recommended amount of all of them.

I would advise you to avoid sleeping more than the recommended 8 hours. I am forced to stare at my goals. to my bathroom mirror. One of the ways that I’ve been doing that lately is by writing all of my goals on index cards. I’ve taped the index cards to my computer. the body you want.Social Superstar been lying in your bed for 8 hours does not mean you got 8 hours of solid sleep. I tossed and turned. If you know you have a tendency to toss and turn for an hour before finally falling asleep. If you find you have to continually go to the bathroom throughout the night. not sleeping pills. In this photo album or collage paste pictures of things you’re striving for. got up several times to use the bathroom. adjusting the pillow every 3 minutes… before finally falling asleep at about 2:30. 4. Everywhere I look from the minute I wake up. I said supplements. These pictures can include pictures of the car you want. Remember. found myself too hot. A good way to stay motivated is to create a picture album or collage of your goals. Using myself as an example. Knowing what your goals are is not always enough to motivate some of us. limit your beverage intake to two hours before bedtime.lie down an hour earlier. Being forced to look at your goals forces you to think about what you have to do to achieve them. last night after lying in bed at about 1:00 am. the girl you 201 . I find that when I stay in bed an extra hour or two in the morning. I tend to be lifeless the rest of the day. If you still find that you’re having trouble getting a thorough night sleep you might want to take some supplements that support sleep patterns such as ZMA and Melatonin. Motivation One of the surest ways to get you pumped full of energy is to get yourself in a completely motivated state. and then too cold. and to my television. Sometimes we need to be motivated by the promise of extreme pleasure or the fear of extreme pain. You need to make sure that you are getting 8 hours of restorative sleep. There is no hiding from them. You also want to avoid getting too much sleep.

especially Tony Robbins. take a picture of yourself in a swim suit. These speakers. Every morning. If you’re trying to lose weight. the first thing I do is listen to one hour of one of these speakers on my IPod.The Best of TSBMAG. There are a couple songs I listen to over and over again at the gym. 5.COM want. do a great job of pumping me up. when I hear these songs I get that burst of motivation I usually feel on the treadmill. Anchoring This is something that I’ve been using lately to great success. On the opposite side of that. Music is another great way to create an anchor. you can post a picture of yourself with your less than ideal body weight. I’ve done this with working out. What has been remarkable is that even away from the gym. 202 . I am naturally more energized in the morning. I’ve found that since I’ve gotten used to being pumped up in the morning from the audio… that now. For some people the pain of seeing themselves look less than desirable will motivate them to get off their ass. and force yourself to see it daily. If you follow these 5 tips you should be able to slowly wean yourself off the Red Bull. the career you want… Anything that will inspire you and get your mind racing. even on days I skip listening to the audio. Jim Rohn. and Jack Canfield. I have been flooding my mind with motivational audio programs like Tony Robbins. I will make sure I play these songs while I’m busting my butt on cardio as they always push me to go the extra mile. If you listen to a certain song continually during times you feel completely motivated… you’ll be able to recreate that feeling just by hearing the song.

jackets. or better yet their closet. hats. shorts. • • • They always wear (piece of clothing) because it goes with everything A majority of their wardrobe is the med to their personal interests Most of the stuff is old and anything new was a onetime purchase (event) You Need Some Clarity So you want to dress cool and be hip? It all starts with understanding what you’re working with and getting rid of what you don’t wear. Go down stairs or in the attic and pull out everything you own for all seasons and events.Social Superstar How to Redo Your Wardrobe Written by Michael Stoute Original Published: 07/24/2008 This is a 3 part series I am writing about how to redo your wardrobe. A common problem is that men put things away because it’s “winter” clothes and then forget about them over time. replace it with more so you can stay style fat! After you have everything organized. pants. You have to manage your wardrobe just like your food supply. When you’re running out of something. shoes. this article is about how to throw away your clothes to get ready to redo your wardrobe. Yes. One of the biggest problems I see when I look at what guys wear. sport coats. This makes things hard for a number of reasons. I mean all of them. Now organize everything by type. There is a reason that you do this first and you will understand by the next article in the series. Organize by Type Get all your clothes together. shirts. t-shirts. not season. suits and underwear. never forget the underwear… 203 . is that there is little or no synergy with the entire wardrobe.

What’s’ Left? If you haven’t been clothes shopping too much lately then you are probably left over with a relatively small amount of clothing. Homework Study the remaining clothes or pictures of them and get ready for Part 2. dump it or wash it and put it in a box somewhere that you will bury as a time capsule for aliens to find in the future. Mix and Match I want you to go through all your remaining clothes and see what actually goes together. The only way this will work is if you get rid of everything you don’t wear so that you can see what you actively have to work with. These are your staple outfits that you currently wear. then you have already gone through your entire wardrobe and thrown away what you didn’t need following the process I outlined. either with photos. Part 2 If you read the previous post in this series “The Throw Away”. pen and paper or in your head Now it’s time to move into the second phase. If you are looking at something and saying “but I have always had this” or “this is my lucky t-shirt”. If you don’t wear too many colors (like most men) this will not be hard and may not even be necessary. then print them out on a cheap color printer so that you can just cut them out like photos. If you take digital pictures. 204 .COM Throw it Out! Go through each pile and start throwing out everything you don’t wear. Most people only wear 15-25 different items on a regular basis yet everyone has a closet full of crap. Now I want you to either write down or take pictures (preferred) of what you currently have and wear on a regular basis.The Best of TSBMAG. Let’s start with colors first. You have also looked at all the remaining items and studied them.

always leaving you with clean clothes! (+ $250) Now that you have thrown away unused clothes and picked out some outfits with the remaining. You should be able to find 3-4 or more nice things for around $75$100. If you used any of the clothing items in more than one outfit. If you don’t have any decent jeans. The reason this part requires money is simple. 205 . The ideal set of different outfits is 10 in my opinion. then this is a clue where the weakest part of your wardrobe lies. Men can typically wear the same or similar jeans over and over without any problem so my guess is that you probably are going to take a bulk of this money and spend it on tops. clothes cost money and you will always have to invest money into your wardrobe to keep it updated. it’s time to put on the finishing touch on your new wardrobe. $250 is a fair amount for a man to spend on his wardrobe in one day. but just think of it as a kick start to your new image. I suggest going to the GAP and buying 2 nice pairs of boot cut jeans to add to your current wardrobe. I would say go to Marshalls or some other “Yesterdays Fashion” outlet and look through the clearance racks. This way you can wear something different for 10 days and do laundry every 5 days. Think about the weaker points of your wardrobe and what you need most. Your initial investment… Take some of your hard earned money and get ready to shop.Social Superstar Look at what you currently have and see what your outfit possibilities are. but before you go I want you to remember the 5 outfits that you are working with already and/or take pictures of them with you. The jeans should run you about $50$75… Shirts and Tops To start things off you want to pick up 3-4 new shirts/sweaters or some kind of top. Try to make 5 different outfits out of what you have. I rarely buy things full price and I always visit the clearance section of every store I go to first. The reason I wanted you to make 5 different outfits is because you want to be able to “recycle” what you wear every week so that you are not wearing the same thing every day and for laundry reasons as well.

or Puma family. take a step back and think of how many other things you own and how this shirt can be meshed in with your current clothing arsenal. If you have to buy a new pair I would suggest trying on a lot of different kinds with a pair of jeans on to see which ones look and feel the best. Comfort is so important with shoes and I urge you to make sure they are comfortable or you will never end up wearing them.COM Clothes Shopping is like Food Shopping Remember while shopping at the store to keep your current wardrobe inventory in mind. For sneakers. Before buying a pair of shoes I would look through your closet for any old shoes you may have forgotten about. Shoes that are made well will last and if they fall apart can usually be fixed. I would recommend something in the Converse. If you are looking at a cool shirt. 206 . Don’t buy that crazy shirt because you will wear it once every 3 weeks and feel like a pimp. Shoes and Sneakers With the reaming money I would like you to buy a new pair of sneakers or shoes. I like to compare clothes shopping to food shopping because when you go food-shopping you are always thinking of ways to maximize what you currently have in your fridge and cabinets. Take your time and pick out a nice pair of shoes that are not too flashy so that you can wear them with almost anything. They tend to stay in style through all of the different fashion cycles. You might find a pair or two of decent leather shoes that you can just take to the shoe shop and get shined and fixed up. Adidas. So check out what you already have before spending a lot of money. Shoes are a different story. Stay away from the high end brands for now unless you can afford them of course. buy the nice button down shirt because is not so flashy and will blend well with your other outfits therefore allowing you to wear it 2-3 times over a 3 weeks period. Same thing with clothes shopping except you are constantly looking for things that will add to and extend your existing wardrobe.The Best of TSBMAG. whatever fits your current lifestyle better.

As your wardrobe gets bigger you will be able to throw in more “loud” items. then they typically go home and realize that these new items don’t fit in to well with their current wardrobe and get frustrated. Let’s say you are willing to spend $100 a month to finance your wardrobe (which is not a lot). Systems and Schedules The easiest way to keep a nice wardrobe going is to build it in baby steps. You have to keep that food shopping mentality I talked about in the previous article of the series. Most men will go shopping for clothes every once in a while and just buy a few things that look good. but I would still suggest only buying 1-2 items at a time. but in the beginning keep thinks basic using solid colors and common styles. When you are out shopping. It has to mesh well with what you already have for you to get the most value out if it. With this $100 I would be looking to buy 3 to 4 new items a month. Just because an item of clothing is nice and looks good in the store isn’t enough to buy it. Split up the money so you spend around $25 a week on say a new shirt or pair of pants. adding new items one at a time. keep mental notes of what you already have in your closet. There is a time and a place to add a “peacock” aspect to it and I will explain how in the final part of the series. This means you have to go shopping 3-4 times a month. I will talk about how to constantly increase your wardrobe at a moderate pace so you don’t go broke and how to “peacock” (stand out) with items no matter what your age or profession. Constantly be buying things that will fit in with what you already have. If you follow this method when buying clothes you will have more outfits than you can think of as time goes on. In this part of the series. Part 3 This is the 3rd and final installment of the How to Redo Your Wardrobe series. You can up the monthly allowance if you like. “Pea cocking” without looking like an idiot 207 .Social Superstar And always remember to keep in mind what you already have including what you buy during this process. In the previous two articles we systematically removed clothes you no longer wear and then preceded with a plan to kick start your new wardrobe with a small amount of money.

You may be wearing a lot of different styles.COM Pea cocking is a term that has become associated with men adding certain items to their wardrobe to stand out. The problem with this concept is that everyone is different and therefore has to “peacock” in a different way.The Best of TSBMAG.. Age 17-21 This is the age range where you are probably all over the place with finding yourself and an image. Styles with young adults change so quickly that I suggest keeping things simple and looking for some trendy items. he he What I am basically saying is that as a young person with no job. stuck in one style because if the people you hang with or just lost altogether and are still wearing the clothes your parents bought you for birthdays. Great examples of this were certain brands and t-shits when I was young. Having these “staple” items will allow you to evolve with the trends while maintaining a nice foundation for your entire wardrobe. 208 . if you don’t already. I feel most of the problem centers around age difference and profession and I will illustrate how you can “peacock” no matter who or where you are in life. I will break this down in 2 separate categories. If you are constantly buying this trendy crap then soon you will have a wardrobe like a clown. Wherever you are in this phase it doesn’t matter. BUM Equipment was huge when I was in HS and that sh*t is UGLY! Then there were those heat activated fabrics that changed colors when you touched it. On the other hand. Just remember that “staple” items are needed no matter what. As for the young professionals out there. you can’t even wear it anymore. Have plenty of solid shirts and pants that you can use when wearing your “trendy” item(s). you have to go with the trend at times to “peacock” and demonstrate that you know what’s up… When you buy trendy items. This is the time where you are going to be experimenting with a lot of things in life so why not your wardrobe too. but still ugly as sh*t.. make sure that they can fit in with what you currently have and aren’t so crazy that when they fade out. great for Kino now that I think of it. the playing field is open to almost anything in the style department. You don’t want to be the person wearing all the different trends because you will look like you are trying too hard.

Social Superstar Age 21-30 Professional You are the type of guy that has a nice job where you have to dress in a suit. I am also going to assume that you have some cash in your pocket to go out and accessorize with. Stay away from pattern shirts with ties unless you are absolutely sure it looks good. jacket and tie or at a minimum. I actually think this is the easiest one to “peacock” out of all the following sections due to the fact you will probably be wearing more clothes in general. cufflinks are for when I wear a tux? Wrong! Yes they are formal. Ties . Sport Jackets This is one of my favorite items of clothing and can be done really right or really wrong. So if you plan to buy some nice cufflinks. shirt and tie. Some guys don’t realize that a sport coat is entirely 209 . If you are a tie freak and own a bunch of wacky designs and stuff then you may want to pick up a few nice silk solids to balance you out. clean classy and professional. there are 3 or more distinct ways to tie the knot. The problem with cufflinks is that you need to have special shirts to wear them with. He he… When picking out ties for patterns and colors I tend to stay with solids and thick stripes. plan on buying a few new shirts to go with them. I want to take a quick moment to mention that when having to wear a tie every day. not the cufflink itself. your shirts for the most part should be solid colors. you may want to reevaluate your alpha male goals. Do the same with your cufflinks. It gives you that full knot that you see in the men’s fashion ads. Most men don’t realize how versatile the tie can really be…For instance. I tend to stay away from the crazier designs of things and keep to basics. but they have been worn for years in regular suits. If you are working a job where you have a dress code like this and make crappy money. If you haven’t noticed yet. but it looks so sweet when done right. I always go with a Double Windsor and so should you! It is by far the hardest knot to tie. which will come with time young Skywalker… Cufflinks .The tie is one of my favorite items to peacock in the professional look. The act of wearing the cufflinks is pea cocking. I have yet to see a better knot that has more girth.Now I know what you may be saying.

Real men “peacock” shoes with class and sedulity. but over all I feel they are a little less dressy than the laced styles besides the fact they are getting played out. There are a ton of different fabrics for sport coats and the more you shop the more you will discover. As far as the style of the shoe. Shoes Shoes are unique part of any man’s wardrobe and they can say a little or a lot about you. Lately it is big to wear a sport coat with a hoodie under it and I think it looks pretty sharp. This is almost the same principle that I talked about earlier with the sport coat fabrics. Forget the designs on the back with that “Ed Hardy” type look. When dressing professional. Loud shoes often scream cheesy and/or make you look like a fool. women will notice the smallest pattern and look…after all they addicted to shoes themselves. Instead look for cool fabrics to peacock. Don’t worry. I prefer laces to slip on types because I feel they just look better. Don’t forget to wear nice socks and a matching belt! No god dam white socks!!!! Age 21-30 Business Casual and Outside of Work Now let’s say that you work in a nice place but its business casual and/or you are outside of work. Sport coats are items that are meant to stand alone and are made with fabrics that are easier to match up with common pants. When picking out sport coat styles I would again keep it simple. Funny thing is that you see guys wearing jackets from their bar mitzvah’s and communion’s with a hoodie and it looks stupid. Just go to any store and walk around touching the fabrics in the suits section and then go over to the sport coats and see the difference for yourself. I would suggest wearing simple styles with nice textures. Being that you won’t likely be wearing a tie or 210 .COM different than the jacket that comes with a suit. The simple fact that you don’t have to tie a slip on combined with the laziness factor of men has caused this style to be played out. it will either look cheap or you will only be able to wear it once in a while.The Best of TSBMAG. I own slip on shoes and I do like them. but this situation is pretty rare due to the material and look of suits. It is true that some suit jackets can double as a sport coat.

make it a nice phat one. So let’s talk button downs… There are many different styles and brands of button down shirts but in general I feel most of them look the same and will get you thrown into the mix with the other cookie cutter button down styles. Fabrics… I can’t say it enough. Take some chances with it. you will be surprised. Since most of these pants will need to be tailored. Being able to pick out unique styles is a skill you hone over time and mixing your wardrobe up like this will keep you from being pinpointed as a “BRAND” whore. Pants and Slacks Fabrics.Their designs are unique and dressy at the same time. My personal favorite. I have plenty of unique “no name” button downs that are probably my strongest items and they were purchased at stores like Marshalls and Kohl’s. “Wow. When being casual the rules change and the power shifts to other items of your wardrobe. This big cuff reminds me a 211 . I am going to focus on pea cocking other items I may have told you to tone down in the above section. If you are wearing a nice pair of pants that feel great from the material. Ben Sherman…. Shirts In the previous section I mentioned to keep you shirts as solids and use the tie and other accessories to accomplish your James Bond “peacock” style. If you are a magician then you can wear pants with flames and naked girls. say 1 ½ inches give or take with your height. this allows you another opportunity to add a little “peacock” to it. they are too old man-ish and hard to keep pressed. women will notice and they will probably touch you just because of it. Fabrics.Social Superstar sport coat. I mention Ben Sherman because I like their stuff. if not grow up! Touch the clothes as you look through them. When buying these types of shirts I almost always go with a designer and/or stick to a few. Stick with a nice smooth looking nice feeling choice. feel the difference. those pants look comfortable!” I would also recommend staying away from pleated designs. If you are going to go with a cuff in the pants.

Game On! 212 . I am sure that I may have missed some things or not fully answered your questions so please leave any in the comments below.COM little of that gangster look from the days of Tommy Gun.The Best of TSBMAG. I think its bad ass… In closing: I hope you have really enjoyed this series and especially this last installment which I worked pretty hard on.

posters.Social Superstar Winning the Day 1 College Roommate War Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/28/2008 It’s all fair in war… and that is exactly what move in day at the dorms is. most closet space. TV. If you walk in and find that there are bunk beds… you have instant decision to make. Son. Mom and dad will wake you up at noon or so… hung over you’ll start loading the cars up with your microwave. computers… You’ll get to campus around two. it may sound cruel… sure. all walking around like clueless tourists… And then you’ll walk into your closet sized dorm room… And your nerdy ass roommate will have already jam packed his stuff into the limited closet space… and even worse… he’ll have claimed the better bed. there are drawbacks to both: Downsides to the bottom bunk: 213 . Yes. No matter how big of a dick you feel for claiming the best bed. you’ll probably want to spend your last day in your hometown boozing it up with your high school buddies into the wee hours of the night…. when it comes to move in day… You need to beat your roommate to the punch. Most people will generally jump at the lower bunk… (I was one of the late hung-over fools who got the top bunk) But in reality. covering the walls with your Pink Floyd and Bob Marley posters… just know… he would do the same thing to you in an instant. there should probably be a more fair way of choosing… but the reality is… the early bird gets the worm. fight the traffic and commotion of another thousand underclassmen pushing shopping carts full of their shit. Sure.

Downsides to the top bunk: • • • • You need to be able to climb in the dark. As for appliances. anytime you’re in bed. Basically. Chances are you’re roommate will have wanted it… This gives you a great bargaining tool later. you’ve got to climb your ass down and get it.COM • • • • • You clunk you head on the supports under the top bunk if you sit up too quickly. If you’re a raging drunk.The Best of TSBMAG. For instance. If the guy above you is a raging drunk… there is a good chance after a night of hard partying you're likely to get an unwanted golden shower. and mooch off his big screen TV and 27 inch computer monitor… Always fill the room with as much of your shit as possible. you’re liable to roll off the bed in shitfaced confusion. If someone is drunk and lost… and your room is open. he wants to watch the Mets… it’s 214 . Every time you wake up to piss in the middle of the night you’ve got to climb down half asleep. As much as you will both try to pretend everything is equal… the guy who owns it unconsciously has final say over how it’s used. and computers… As tempting as it sounds to let him haul all his stuff to the dorms. and want something. entertainment. Even with the downsides of the bottom bunk… always choose it. People will always be sitting on your bed when they come in your room. When your roommate climbs down from the top he’ll probably wind up stepping on your head out of spite. they’ll crawl into the bottom bunk because the top is too high. you want to watch the Yankee game.

and to do a formal introduction to each other. chances are you’ll speak on the phone a week or two before move in day to discuss what both of you are bringing. you have all the time in the world to socialize later. If you’ve got a lot of posters… bring them all. you’ll have all your shit packed and ready to go the night before. This simple line will give him a false sense of security. hop in the shower. If he doesn’t have any. The last thing you want is some dweeb hanging pictures his parents brought him back from their last trip to Key West. guzzle the Red Bull.Social Superstar your TV… he’ll be checking scores on the internet. Set you alarm clock for 7am and have 2 cans of Red Bull waiting by the bed. How to be sure you beat him to the room First. taking first crack at the hotties on your floor. The minute the alarm clock goes off. you’ll get the better bed. Getting there early provides several benefits… you’ll get better parking and fight less of a crowd getting to your dorm. you’re free to decorate the room as you please. So the sooner you finish the move in bullshit… the sooner you can begin to conquer your campus. In the meantime. It is crucial during this conversation that you bluff. and amaze your parents at how energetic and excited you are to get to campus. 215 . Remember the first week of college is crucial for establishing yourself as the party guy…. He will feel like he’s got all the time in the world to mosey down to campus. These are not things you want to negotiate. and more importantly. You tell him that you’ll be getting back late from a trip that afternoon and probably won’t make it to campus until later in the evening. while you’re watching Jeter and company on your big screen.

but the party isn’t the point of the story so I’ll sum it up quickly. Argentina. my girl. wine. I mean. but the both of us were in the thick of relationships and our girls jumped at the chance to have a romantic getaway in Buenos Aires. only my friend Jake and I decided to go. The entire drive in the van we are guzzling beers. John. His Spanish friends were downright cruel. John is blindfolded and mouth duck taped. kidnap John from his apartment. He had lived there the past 4 years. Jake. We had both been to South America enough times to know not to bring sand to the beach. I was still within the first 3 months with Kate. I could write an entire post on the bachelor party alone. But what’s done is done…. had no choice but to go along with it.The Best of TSBMAG. Jake.COM The Buenos Aires Hooker Juice Incident Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/28/2007 I want to prelude this story by saying that this one of those stories that makes me question my own moral character. and the rest is history. was getting married in Buenos Aires. had been with his girl close to two years and was miserable that he wouldn’t be able to tag some new Spanish ass. We had arrived just in time!! The girls. Needless to say we were both ecstatic when we get a call from John’s cousin the first night down there informing us that his bachelor party was tonight. so I didn’t necessarily mind having her tag along on this trip. and then rip it 216 . on the other hand. At one point they put duct tape over John’s hairy nipples. and I. A bunch of John’s Spanish friends. He invited a bunch of us to the wedding. he fell in love with an Argentinean girl. although not happy to be spending their first night in Argentina alone. even by Bobby Rio standards. Force him into woman’s clothing and throw him in the back of a van. and whatever bottle of hard liquor that is currently being passed around. and although he had planned to move back to the US. this is an all time low. Out of all our friends. and we are shouting derogatory things at him while harassing him physically. The bachelor party was the one of the craziest experiences I’ve ever seen. Two years ago a college friend of mine.

wedding preparations. then we loaded him into the van and headed to the strip bar. Jake and I had other plans.” Meeting them at their apartment was a little more than I bargained for. and go home. They say they can’t leave the bar till 4. then the titty bar. on what was supposed to be a romantic getaway with my girlfriend. let them grope us. just flirt a little bit. The next couple days of the trip are quite civil.” he says. All the while the stripper’s phone numbers are just burning a hole in our pockets. heaven. he turns to me and says “They want us to meet them at their apartment. The strip bar was a full frontal festival of beautiful busty Latinas…or as I like to call it. We let him sweat it out for about a half hour. Jake calls the stripper. But I’m a good friend. I’ve never seen so many trannies in my life. but “what the hell. and after some back and forth conversation in Spanish that I couldn’t understand. Unfortunately most of John’s friends were married and were more excited about the kidnapping part of the night. Then they open up the back of the van and make John (still in women’s clothing) run behind the van tied to a leash. Finally the 4th day into the trip Jake can’t take it anymore… He say’s we have to go meet the strippers. So I agree to hang out with the strippers. I am honestly pretty content at this point with Kate. We are sitting on a couch with two of the strippers listening to them tell us how much they love our blonde hair and blue eyes (I think that's code for “I love your money”) Anyway. involving a lot of sightseeing. big dinners. We take the numbers and leave. and I can see how much Jake needs this. and am in no rush to go sneaking around with strippers. (The beauty of 3rd world laws) This part of the story climaxed when we arrive in a park that was filled with Transsexual prostitutes. leaving him to be ravaged by Planet of the Shemales. Jake who speaks some Spanish asks them if they want to hang out tonight.Social Superstar off. “Just for kicks. Our plan is to just meet them for lunch or something.” 217 . but give us their numbers and make us promise to call them this week. They gave me the address. and getting dragged to every clothing store in the city so that our girls can take advantage of 3rd world bargains. We take John out of the car and tie him to a fence and pretend to drive away.

who is grinning like a kid in a candy store. roughly $40. if by stripper you mean prostitute. Jake pulls out his paper with the phone numbers. disgusted. We have to walk up 8 floors of stairs to get to their apartment. We stand outside the building giggling nervously like a couple of giddy teenagers. Her body’s alright. We are both in shock. The girls look at this as an opportunity to go on a shopping binge without us. who asks us our names when we enter. A cab drops us off in front of a large brick building. I feel a little… I don’t want to say sleazy… you know… just a little creped out… but she’s wearing only a robe and I keep hearing my dick say “follow her boy… faster…damnit!!!” A minute later I’m in a dingy little room filled with a small bed. There is a Madame sitting at a desk. a television set. confused. My stripper. comes out of a room and hand signals me to follow her. My prostitute’s face is a little less pretty than I remember. I just shrug. She is drenched in hooker perfume (presumably to cover up the smell of her previous appointment) 218 . and are trying to gauge the other’s desire to go through with this. We will fuck the whores!!! My fake name is called first. She asks us who we are here to see. I look at Jake.. It is immediately clear upon entering the apartment that we have just entered a classic South American Brothel. We make up a couple fake names. and wait for my change. After a minute of stern deliberation it is settled. I walk toward the desk where the Madame asks me for $35.The Best of TSBMAG. We muster up the courage and walk in.. and don’t seem to mind our departure. The Madame tells us to take a seat. I’m slightly embarrassed by the situation and the fact that a language barrier prevents us from communicating.COM We make up some excuse about going to meet John for one last guys only luncheon. I’m really not sure how I’m supposed to proceed with the scenario. and a night stand. and reads two names. Jake and I sit and give each other little looks. except for a really nasty c-section scar. Jake looks at me with a “what the fuck” type of look. (Yes $35…And our girlfriends thought they were getting bargains in the malls) I hand her about 100 pesos. disappointed. I am quite winded by the time we reach the top and barely notice the 2 two middle aged white men that just exited the apartment we were about to enter.

I may throw up.” I attempt to smell myself several times. She is happy. I get out of the bed and begin putting my clothes on. too” Jake is laughing.. 3.” “You need to burn those clothes. and hope Kate doesn’t notice I’m wearing a different outfit. borrow clothes. 219 . I feel extremely dirty.. I want to get the fuck out of there… but I don’t want to sit in the lobby waiting for Jake. But oddly. Jake starts sniffing me. Deny and play dumb. I can’t show up at our hotel smelling like a whore. 2. “Dude. I am no longer turned on. “ We go through my options: 1. She is running her hands through my hair and licking my ear. “I need a shower badly.. Now that I’ve cum she looks even less pretty and the c-section scar looks even uglier and nastier. I try to gesture that I have a headache. I back away. She wants to cuddle… We lay there with about twenty minutes to kill. down the staircase… out the door… and smack into the cold light of day. My performance is adequate. My prostitute is whispering something in Spanish. Show up smelling like a whore. Buy some cologne and drench myself in enough of it to override hooker scent. And he wins. She just keeps trying to tongue me... my dick is quite hard. “This ain’t fucking funny man. I am probably the first guy under forty she’s fucked all day. He gives me a nod.Social Superstar She is smiling and rubbing her titties under the robe. Call John see if I can go to his place. She takes my hand and puts it on her breast. you fucking reek of hooker perfume” “Fuck! That bitch was drenched in the shit. He moves forward and smells me again.. We both hurry out of there… through the halls. if not stellar. After briefing one another on the gory details of the last hour. Her perfume is giving me a headache so I have my face buried in the pillow. She tries to kiss me on the lips. shower. I think she is telling me she loves me. Jake meets me in the lobby a few minutes later.

He smells his wife (like she might be the one drenched in whore juice) John then walks out of the bathroom and immediately blurts out “What's that smell?” Jake points at me.. I take off my shirt and start washing my chest and stomach. I try to explain my situation but the reception is horrible. Once I get in the bathroom I start washing my hands. I lean out the door and call for John.. She almost chokes. No one wants to ask me why I smell like I’ve taken a bath in cheap perfume. I am now completely naked scrubbing myself with a sponge that was in his shower. his fiancé there… but so is Mariella’s mother and father. She motions for us to come in. John comes to the door. We need to take care of this as fast as possible as the girl’s are surely beginning to wonder what's taking us so long. I point back at Jake. “You guys went to meet those strippers didn’t you?” “I’ll explain later… can you please get me some clothes to wear?” “Yea… but you’re bigger than me. I am stunned. She introduces us as “John’s amigos de Estados Unidos”. Once we get in we notice that not only is Mariella. I shout “can I come over for a minute” into the phone. Her mother comes over and kisses me on the cheek. She grabs my hand and leads me toward them. We jump out of the cab and ring John’s bell repeatedly. I start to put my clothes back on and realize that it would be defeating the purpose of washing if I put the smelly clothes back on. face. I ask John if I can use the bathroom. She wants to introduce us to them. Everyone in the apartment is completely uncomfortable with the situation. neck… fuck it. I reluctantly enter. Her father gets a whiff of the smell and starts sniffing suspiciously.COM I call John from a pay phone. He shouts “Sure” Jake and I take a cab to John’s apartment. My mind is blank for an excuse as to why I smell like whore. but it's too late. I try to hide my stench behind Jake. I try to wave to avoid a handshaking and kiss. John’s fiancé answers the door. They’re going to be a little tight. We’re buzzed in and quickly rush up three flights of stairs.” “I don’t fucking care… “ 220 .The Best of TSBMAG. I can only imagine the conversation that is taking place outside the door.

So I just go along with it. and in an effort to avoid any more embarrassing conversation I quickly announce that we have to meet our girlfriends back at the hotel. We finally get back to the hotel. 221 . Then she notices the clothes I am wearing. I am afraid I might blurt something stupid out. Kate is waiting for me. Just my luck… she’s horny. I feel too guilty to speak. She gives me the “fuck me eyes” I try to tell her that I’m tired.Social Superstar I put on Johns clothes. She is happy to see me. I make up an excuse about spilling spaghetti sauce all over myself at lunch… had to go to John’s to change. Mariella and her parents are still in total shock and barely acknowledge me when I wave goodbye. I exit the bathroom. “Are you wearing perfume?” she asks. She believes my story. They are a quite tight on me. She is lying in bed… relaxing after a hard day shopping. I hesitantly enter my room. Not in the mood… but apparently my tight eighties rocker jeans are turning her on. She pulls off me for a second. She starts nibbling my ear. The shirt is not bad. But the jeans make me look like an 80’s rocker. I thank John for the clothes and grab Jake and we bounce.

and make your way to the bar to grab a Bohemia and take in the view. who wakes up early and takes a jog on the beach. well-reviewed. which left you with very few clear memories. You were here two years ago but that trip was during your “Black Label” phase. You are still riding the adrenaline rush of last night’s Red Bull and Cialis fueled comet trail of adventure. and a liver that still has not forgiven you. 222 . maybe plays a game of tennis. has fruit for breakfast. You entered to pounding bongo drums. reads Hemingway at a table outside a café along the water. He curses you out in Portuguese. Now that you’ve made your token phone calls you feel like you have just been to Confession at church. No sign of the blonde and her friend that you were supposed to meet. Your night began at Amozoa. you confessed nothing. But Brasileras have no concept of “on time. You hang up the phone and pay the fifteen Reas for the call. Your highly acclaimed novels are still buried beneath dirty clothes in your suitcase. Yet. or was it Europa? You were already pretty tight when you arrived.” This morning when you called your mother you felt ashamed.COM Fortaleza ights Part 1 Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/14/2007 You bought three new. You used phrases like “Nice and relaxing” “Catching up on work” “Plowing through novels” “Good restaurants "and “often lonely” to describe the trip. who on vacation. “No tengo nada” you lie. You’ve always envisioned yourself as the kind of guy. and then hits up a local museum. A street kid puts out his hand for coins as he passes you by. The kind of guy. a vaguely tribal feel. “Where you from?”A Brazilian guy is shouting in your ear. You don’t know at exactly what point you deviated from your “ideal self. hiked up for extra effect. sipping a glass of Cabernet.” so you don’t worry.The Best of TSBMAG. and a clan of scantily clad Brasileras shaking their stuff on stage to the pulse of the music. Bits and pieces are forming shapes in your mind as you sip an espresso and watch the girl’s parade down the strip in their short denim skirts. novels for this trip.

“You like?” he asks you. You twirl her around and do a once over. But your “well raised” childhood taught you to never be rude.” you tell him. You wonder if maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if the blonde doesn’t show up.” you scream back. She shakes her finger “no” but her smile lets you know it okay to continue.Social Superstar You wonder if you have the word “gringo” tattooed on your forehead. Maybe a Red Bull will help you “man up. A petite light skinned Brasilera giggles. “You like Coca. It’s not like you don’t have options. You turn to the girl and go Cave Man on her. You run your hand from her ass up the curves of her abdomen.” You walk back to the bar and order your first of the night. 223 . and visions of “the blonde” naked were like piranhas gnawing on your brain. As you crack open your second Bohemia you wonder if you have the energy to go through with the night. You’re not sure if you welcome company at this time.” You check your watch. You decide to do a lap and see if your blonde and friend have arrived. “I’ll find you a good one. They both have penciled in eye brows and slicked back jet black hair. You were quite enjoying your own blurred thoughts and not quite enticed by the idea of engaging conversation with a guy who obviously wants something from you. Thinking it might be a pick pocket you swat it away. Marijuana?” “Only chicas” you say. The girl/guy things are giving you “fuck me” eyes and while their gender is not clear. You grab her ass like you own it. For some reason you always feel compelled to speak your broken Portuguese. All could have been avoided if you had only jerked off when the desire arose earlier in the day. You politely thank their pimp but tell him “I already have a chica. The guy seems genuinely pleased with himself. when you near her breast she grabs your hand and places it back on her ass. He calls over probably the only two ugly girls in the club. What you like?” “No necassario. You feel a hand graze you butt. “Estados Unidos. it is certain that they are prostitutes. and you wonder if they could be transvestites. even when they’re speaking English. But jerking off in Brazil seemed like an Oxymoron.

And if they don’t? You look around. the skinny. Sit tight my friend. Fucking “gringos” in their Brasilia Soccer jerseys. Those far away eyes. When you come out of the stall you wish you had given it an extra couple of shakes as you notice a nice wet spot near your crotch. It was only yesterday you were busting through language barriers on basis of charm. the barely clothed “garotas de programma” putting their pussy on display. Throw you off balance a bit. They always do. pointing at buildings…works every time. The Red Bull rush has begun. you think.The Best of TSBMAG. the black girls with huge hoop earrings commanding the dance floor…the punk rockers. tell her “it was a pleasure” and make your way through the crowd. the one with the shaved head. the fat. It comes in all forms. yesterday at lunch. Brasileras aren’t shy about pointing that sort of thing out. You kiss this one on the cheek. rolled with the punches… And won her over with impersonations of “stupid Americanos” holding your imaginary map. They’ll come. There is something fundamentally perfect about being adored. the Asian looking ones with sinister eyes. The one that can keep a girl laughing when she has no clue what you’re saying. too many girls… too little time. Curious eyes are set upon you from all directions. the long swanky model types with heartbreaking cheek bones. the beautiful. never do Disney vacations. that when the friend arrived unexpectedly. the sixteen year old debutants. What do you know? Another Bohemia has bit the dust. Sex is all around you. She points to your eyes and tells you they’re beautiful. foreshadowing all of the reasons that you’ll most likely never get married. But not now. You’re about to head back into that bathroom to dry off when you spot the blonde and her friend on the dance floor surrounded by guys. 224 .boom shaking mulattas. Back to the bar. Presenting your best self. you think. But first a much need bathroom break. The boom.COM “Eu Gusto” you tell her. the fucked up X heads. You are a fucking Star. never have kids. Your swagger has returned. the crazy. A situation like this might normally unravel your nerves. Yes. The self.Does it matter? Then you remember staring into her eyes. never raise a family.

And when the two of them. 225 .Social Superstar When you started to sense that the friend might be the type to be persuaded… you upped the ante…divvied up your attention…treated them equally special. No way. No. ran their fingers through your hair and kept repeating “muito lindo” you saw the potential for something truly spectacular. guards finally down. You’re not willing to wave the white flag quite yet. Jose.

You take the blonde by the hand and immediately remove her 226 . You want to knock that smug look off his Portuguese face.” A louder voice hails down a cab and says “To the cheapest motel. Has your Super Americano Power waned? Have your girls been swept away with tales of a booming European economy… You decide to flex your muscles.there is always tomorrow. You rode in like a rock star. kicking over a flower pot.COM Fortaleza ights Part 2 Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 12/02/2007 The night bellman at your hotel is talking loudly at you in a language you don’t understand. you think. You order 8 shots of the Brazilian equivalent of Yagermeiser. You slovenly escort the two girls outside. The girls could not be happier to see you. Rapido! Por Favor” You would be damned to let the night go up in flames at this point. You signal over a cocktail waitress. You’re drunk and go for tongue but both girls resist. Fortaleza’s most well known and luxurious hotel. The whole matter could have easily been resolved with a small bribe. But you blew any chance of that happening with your “American sense of entitlement” and incoherent attack on his character. The group is confused. Apparently strolling in at 4am with a couple of barely legal Brasileras is frowned upon at this establishment.The Best of TSBMAG. Just a few hours ago you were in the mist of the single biggest girl heist of your life. Nights early. he is telling you. a girl dangling from each arm. You get the gist of it though. One voice in your head says “Cut your losses. No one sent you the memo. They reluctantly do the shots… looking around to see who the mysterious stranger is that sent them. He points at the door. You get two kisses on the lips. Back at the club you had come out of the bathroom to spot your girls sandwiched in the middle of a group of Norwegians. You have the waitress deliver the shots to your girls and their new Norwegian friends. ordering the cleaning lady to bring a bottle of Scotch up to your room… Pronto! These sorts of things aren’t acceptable in Hotel Luzieros. You felt a little intimidated. You make your Great Gatsby entrance.

Rearrange some priorities. Manny’s hand is on your knee and he is talking loudly and passionately in Portuguese. But you don’t want to think about these things right now. You’ll have some contemplating to do when you get home.from the opulent to the destitute. Outside the street is still tinkered with people.Social Superstar from the group. Emelia. a lone hooker trots on heels. They get closer closer closer…They Kiss. Jackpot! After an hour or two of dry humping the two Brasileras and taking turns kissing them you suggest the bounce. And if they don’t we chop you up and feed you to pigs” The girls are too busy to notice. one hand holding her skirt from riding too far up her ass. Down the road. Raquel. and a girl who turned out to be sixteen. You take turns grinding with each girl… you look on in disbelief as the girls grind sexually with each other. Brazil is a strange place for sure. …Toward dawn you are sitting in the front seat of a cab next to Manny the driver. You reach your hand in the back and one of the girls begins 227 . Smile and nod. You casually ask the girls to see their documents. Manny could probably tell you stories that would break your heart. You trust that Manny is actually taking you to a motel and not to a guerrilla hide out where you will be kidnapped and tortured. Maybe even some life decisions to make. the brunette is eighteen. You flashback to an incident in Brazil two years prior involving a spotlight. He could just as easily be saying “You parents will pay the ransom. You smile and nod. Your “gringo sense of rhythm” is usually a game killer but tonight you’re Michael fucking Jackson. Make you run back to the States. But you aren’t certain. Their eyes light up. You look back and feel bad leaving the brunette to the pack of Norwegian wolves. a couple machine guns. but can never be sure of these things. Pick up some pieces… From the back seat Emelia lets out a squeal. The girls drag you on the dance floor. The long winding road that is Avenida Beira Mar travels the course of the night. In the back seat Raquel is disappearing inside Emelia’s dress. the blonde is twenty. You think Manny likes you. He is asking you questions. As your cab gets closer you see that she is topless. Manny doesn’t blink an eye as you pass her. The coast is clear for takeoff. You signal for her to come over.

Sandwiched in between the two warm bodies. 228 . They are giggling in a way that reminds you that this is exactly where they want to be. These guys seemed to know what they were doing. that you began to feel comfortable around them. You slide into them. you still had that underlying fear that you’ll be discovered as a fraud. All your doubts are alleviated when Raquel and Emelia fall onto the bed. It wasn’t until college. And even as it finally began to come naturally to you. Looking at the girls. that is just about how you feel right now. Yea… once upon a time. Growing up you always thought the other guys knew some fundamental secret about girls that you didn’t. Raquel is the first to signal you onto the bed. And when they quickly undress. When Manny pulls away. you can only wonder what you did in a previous life to reap these fruits in this one. You run your hands along the crest of their abdomens. Maybe you can be again… Just not tonight.The Best of TSBMAG. you are reminded that this is exactly where you want to be. Even as you began a long string of conquests you always had the feeling you were just learning what came naturally to others. you experience a moment of doubt. leaving you and the girls in front of the motel.COM sucking your fingers. with the help of alcohol. They both are both kissing your neck. Their bodies are twisting and turning into one another. you were one of the good guys. Emelia gently slides your pants down to your ankles.

I get home and search my drawers for my least appealing outfit. I took her virginity for god sake.” I park my car outside of her apartment. She's been at happy hour. She's 25lbs away from pulling it off. I hear my buddy Phil saying. that way if it's a bomb. Jillian. She must have caught it. and I realize that the day didn't exactly start out with promise. I think back to waking up with a huge hangover. she is old pussy. And she took mine (although I don't let too many people know that. I refuse to waste a Friday or Saturday on her. I sneer. “Always take two cars. about a year before Beth (love of my life till she broke my heart in a million pieces) came around. As much as I hated this girl when I was dating her. She wants me to meet her at her apartment. This means we will be taking one car. and she comes back two minutes later in a different outfit. She always was an annoying drunk. and you take off. If I'm going to fuck this girl. So I had no intention of calling her. And everyone loves old pussy. you tell her you're going to take a piss. So why should it end with promise. As I'm checking my email. There goes the quick getaway. Jake seems to think I'm going to fuck her.Social Superstar 10 Years After I Took Her Virginity Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/27/2007 I get the random phone call. But I should have figured she would call me.) I say. Great. I smile because there is a part of me that kind of knows it's true. wants to know if I want to meet up for drinks one night this weekend. She’s ten years older than she was when I dated her. and totally inappropriate black hooker boots. I call Jake on the way home. a skirt. and she was no prize then. she calls. She answers the door dressed in a tight white shirt. because she tells me she’ll be right back. I ran into her about a week ago for the first time in years and gave her my number out of courtesy when she gave me hers. she’s drunk. I sit in it for a second. Plus she’ll expect less time from me on a week night. An outfit I don't usually mind on girls who can pull it off. what about tonight. I'm going to do everything in my power to convince myself I wasn’t intending to. a girl I dated for a little over a year. 229 .

Instead of joining the fun I walked over to the pool table where three girls were about to start playing. isn't it?” She says we’ll go to a place outside. “This is New Jersey there are no outside cafes. I was behind her in line and she told him to verify her name with me.” She insists and I don't feel like arguing. Amazingly the dog is being good. He’s a cop and is interested in her story. I get out of the bathroom and this bitch has a crowd of derelicts surrounding her. “This is going to be a long night. Luckily her name came back to me right then. I felt this was a perfect time to apologize for my blunder. “Lauren. I recognized one of the girls. I take this as my cue to excuse myself for a much needed piss break. I have now been in the car with her for twenty minutes. Plus one her friends had made eye contact with me while I was grabbing a drink at the bar on the way back from the bathroom.” I think. because she's’ crazy. and I have to pet it while she tells me how cute it is. “that is a problem. She was an old college friend of a friend type girl. We get to the pub and this bitch won’t leave the thing in the car. Unfortunately I don’t have that option.The Best of TSBMAG. I tell her. So I do the next best thing and guzzle gin and tonics. which was good. “Just pick a place and leave the fucking dog in the car.COM It is awkward in her apartment. There is this little dog that keeps jumping on my leg. I tell her. well. I keep nodding my head. When the guy asked me. 230 . I smile because. She is in the middle of some story about how she got pulled over for no good reason. does in fact. She tells me the puppy is too scared to stay home alone. I wish I could tape record this car ride to play to people to demonstrate the torture I was going through listening to this bitch. And so she was kicked out of the club. All egging this stupid cop story on.” I say to get her attention. I just for the life of me couldn’t remember her name. Talking loudly and compulsively about nothing. Apparently her rambling has put it to sleep. Nothing I care about anyway. and a guy playing pool over hears her.” She picks the Town Pub. have no outdoor places. Finally I say. This idiot puts this little puppy in her purse. Over the summer she was getting harassed by a bouncer who was claiming her ID was a fake. At that precise minute she puts the dog into her purse and tells me she is taking it with us for drinks. She soon realizes that New Jersey. because I don't know many people that go there.

and proceed to defend myself for ever having dated this idiot. We are hitting it off nicely. And a bunch of other shit I could care less about. I paired with Ivana. ‘I didn't see nothing look’. Jill comes over to me and explains how Lauren just hates her for fucking her ex boyfriend. I need another drink. but I'm feeling sporty. When we walk back to pool table there is tension between Jill and Lauren. I explain what a dog was doing in her purse. She is crying hysterically. Her face is covered in blood. They feel my pain. Only she is crazy. I figure Jill won’t mind. I walk her away from the crowd. It starts freaking out. the puppy wakes up. Everyone in the place is staring at her like she's crazy. I tell her. She is screaming that the girls stole her dog. I tell them they should probably give it back. The cute one who was eying me. Just then Jill comes barreling out the front door. I walk back over to Ivana and see if there is any chance of getting her back to my house later. I promise to call. We chat for a few. The three girls are in it with the puppy. The two remaining girls decide it's a good time to flee. All the girls hover around the dog. She glances at the bag and realizes that there is no dog in there. And apparently is scared of pubs. She looks under the table. She has an accent. We exchange numbers. I just wanted to talk to Ivana some more. When she leaves. We are all kind of making fun of my obnoxious friend and her and her obnoxious stories. She realizes that the girls are gone now too. I call Ivana over to me. I twirl my finger by my ear to signify she’s crazy. As Jill is talking to the girls. I should have never left because when I come back Jill is by the pool table telling the girls how we were each other's firsts.Social Superstar She’s a friendly girl and within minutes I'm the fourth player on a two on two pool game. and decide to take it. I will go outside to see if the girls have it. She's from Denmark or France or something. Something I never do. The girls all laugh. She panics. I tell Jill to go to the bathroom and cool down for a minute. One of the girls grabs the dog and heads for the door. she is preoccupied with the derelicts anyway. I explain my ordeal. I give a. She starts scurrying around. They decide that Jill is unfit to raise this dog. Jill stops in the middle of a sentence to point out that Lauren has been giving her dirty looks. I offer to buy the girls a round. Meanwhile Jill has lost it completely. I'm standing by Lauren’s SUV. I feel queasy. Ivana and I say a nice goodbye. Jill has made her way back to the booth near the pool table. She is absolutely 231 .

I give her another little hug. She's in the emergency room and just wants to tell me what a complete and utter selfish. I can.” he says. give her a little hug. She doesn't remember. before the fight. I ask her how it happened. When our half hour was up we just keep making love until someone from the front desk has to come in and tell us to leave. and tell her. feeling a little guilty for letting it happen. “Not till a titty pops out.COM hysterical. 232 . I agree. I ask the bouncer if he's going to break it up. She says she can't believe I'm leaving. He then searches the truck for the dog. Jill is crying and bleeding and hugging the dog. but I have to go. That night I dream of Beth and being up in Killington with her. He wants to know if they really have her dog. I really can be a dick. They are both punching each other violently. Later in the night we make love in the outdoor hot tub with a couple watching. Finally the bouncer runs over and breaks it up. She gets blood on me. I push her off and start to walk away. She was bleeding when she came out of the pub. I shrug. Maybe she ran into a wall in all the confusion. Her all bundled up.The Best of TSBMAG. A bouncer calls me over and asks me what happened. I'm awakened from my dream the next morning with a phone call from Jill. I teach her how to ski and she picks it up quickly and soon she is beating me down the mountain. Looking so cute as she keeps falling into the snow. "it's been a fun night. I kind of pat her on the back. Her lip is still bleeding pretty badly. waiting for us to use up the half hour we were allowed to be in there. I tell her I have work early. And so begins another fine morning. My head hits the pillow and I wonder if this is really what my life has come to." She says it's really fucked up for me to just leave her like this. heartless dick I am. I got to get as far away from this psychopath as possible. She runs over to the SUV and starts screaming at the girls. He takes it from the truck and hands it to Jill. We are outside Jill’s apartment and I'm trying to calm her down. I suggest we leave. We look over at the car where Jill has pulled Lauren out.

A common line. Young new pussy is what this house is all about. Still have visions of girls sitting on our shoulders. “Did she see the house?” or “What did she say when she walked in?” Like because we had a house (only slightly nicer than a frat house mind you) girls were going to just fuck us.Social Superstar My First Piece of MySpace Pussy Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/20/2007 We've always had delusions of grandeur in regards to the house we our renting. “Bobby's old and kind of sleazy.” I'm blunt but. We also always imagined that because we had the house now.” The first month we have the house. Yep. “Maybe the house isn't as impressive as we think. But he's got a nice house.” Jake proclaims “Shut up with that. Sort of like Field of Dreams. An outdoor one. and his teeth are really yellow. So we were naturally perplexed when a couple weeks had gone by and none of us were yet to christen our new place with a new girl. it's the bars we go to. I'm in no mood for excuses. guarantee we'd be more appreciated there. “I'm telling you. “I'm telling you. Probably because we lived in such shit throughout college. We should have it packed right now with girls flipping coins seeing who gets to fuck us next. getting ready for the onslaught of young new pussy that was awaiting us. naked chicken fighting. so I'll fuck him anyway.” Jale again.” I tell them. my roommates and I have over glorified this house. Like they're going. “What the fuck is it?” Brian is asking us after a third Friday in a row sitting on floor in the living room drunk watching Napoleon Dynamite at 3 in the morning. “We are wasting this house. Without women.” Brian says. we all basically start blowing off the girls we were dating. 233 . and shit like that. We were still without couches for our living room and we were hot tub shopping. It would have been sweet. we go to New York. girls would just naturally come.

Without paying. Having a reputation to live up to can be a pain in the fucking ass sometimes. “I don't see condom wrappers in either of your trash cans. Of course there was the slight crick in the plan being that it's a completely dead Monday bar night and we don't have any leads to work with from the weekend.COM “Don't do it.” “I'm going to out you on the internet. Apparently they see the irony.” Jake with hands over ears. Tell everyone about your 2 week long drought. “I don't know man. “Get on the phone. Without calling one of my old stand bys. 234 . My first thought was to call Tammy and break the rule a little bit. Take a quick piss and decided I was getting laid tonight. “Bobby Rio having trouble getting laid?” They laugh.The Best of TSBMAG. Are we the neighborhood homos. and I swore Id fuck something new tonight. In this house. You know what grown men share a house at thirty? Crack heads. Crack heads and gay men. The one thing that keeps me single. Recollect on the weekend. it would be a completely new chick. We're almost thirty. I got pretty excited imagining what she was going to look like. boys?” That Monday I woke up in the morning.I am just fucking horny and have to be realistic.” Brian threatens me with what he knows it my worst fear. On one hand she is an old standby. the pleasure of not knowing what the next girl you'll fuck looks like. “Give it time. I announce my dilemma to my roommates as we were all preparing for work. do your magic.” Jake says.” Me still optimistic. stop. I lie in bed. now clearly enjoying the opportunity to rip.” Jake says. “You might be on to something I finally admit. Don't crush my dreams daddy. No. I try to defend myself.” “You're crushing it. But on the other hand.

“Yea. I could bring Keira Knightly home and fuck her on the kitchen table and they still wouldn't be impressed. you'll both be thanking Bobby. And I'm getting you two pricks laid too. on school nights?” Brian says. I always hear stories of successful book store pickups. but still kind of considered it creepy to be contacting girls online. Although I was fairly confident I could have taken home this Mexican women that kept giving me the eye.” “Work you're magic. I headed home to regroup. Not much talent here this morning though. and know it is a weak comeback. if she could stay out past her curfew. but it is the first Monday of the month. I'm getting laid tonight.” I say this. I hang out in Shop Right for a bit. I call out of work. I had put a profile up a month or two ago. But tomorrow morning. and it is full of people cashing in their food stamps.” I am saying this wondering how the hell I am going to deal with them tomorrow morning when we all wake up alone. I figured I just start humming one of her favorite songs. I also quickly found that my off beat sense of humor didn't translate well in emails. browsing profiles on MySpace. I try to think where I can go on a Monday morning to meet some women. I still managed to waste hours browsing profiles. but I have a vague recollection of a past conversation that didn't go so well. “I think I saw her hanging out in front of 7-11 the other night. Bobby. I am sitting on my computer.” Jake inputs. I head to Barnes and Noble. maybe casually mention how much I love Lost or whatever other stupid show she has 235 . she had two bratty kids that would have posed a problem in closing the deal quickly. What time is it again. I await the abuse. There is a cute girl behind the counter serving coffee.Social Superstar “I could be fucking Tammy any day this week plenty of other girls too. “That's it. As the details of conversation become less blurry I decide I better get the hell out of there before she recognizes me. I looked at it like I was acquiring ammunition in case I ever ran into one of these girls in a bar. “You joke now. These two dicks.

I enlarge them and get set to analyze. I wrote her back. My about me and who I'd like to meet. But as I'm looking at her picture my dick is getting hard so it's settled. I think as my home screen reads new messages. not in fact. Brazilian or Asian. I am sad to report. Or how I met them. I am currently taking applications for Wednesday nights. hung like a -use your imagination. For a moment I feel special. My spare time consists of trying to find ways to sneak strange women out of my room before they realize that I don't know their name.COM listed under TV. About me: Well. Who I'd like to meet: Adventurous. and heroes. I'm sure you're reading this and wondering. So send at least four pictures. I mean it would be fate. Slightly chubby. and decide that she is. An exposed left arm kind of scares me. I have posted the email in its entirety. Single white. Perfect. how can I be one of those lucky ladies? Well it's your special day. I read the email. that smart. Then the thought hits me. No clear body shots. A lovely word. She'll do. "Pick me!" And so we have a winner. So I am a bit surprised when I see that it's a girl called "Everything I thought you know" that has messaged me.The Best of TSBMAG. Only three. but in that sloppy goodness sort of way. View more pictures. Picture Tara Reid twenty five pounds heavier. A tad larger than I would prefer. Two of the pictures have to be body shots. And write me a brief essay on why you deserve to be Bobby's Miss Wednesday Night. and I'd be golden. I am the mother fucking man. 236 . shed have to fuck me right? Fate. I start believing the hype. about me. I click on her profile page to check her out more. if I'd have to do a newspaper singles ad it word read something like this. might explain it. Adorable face. male. I read her interests. I go back to her profile page. a plus! I did not receive many applications. what if she is smart enough to be displaying sarcasm. I am the man.women. She is only eighteen. open minded women. contact me and I'll show you. Now. Or better yet. I have posted it in its entirety. I very rarely got messages on MySpace. spontaneous. Blonde.

music. and in an effort to save space. If I hear from you we'll take it further. She tells me that these two girls are the only ones that would be willing to come tonight. Now I've heard of online success stories. When my roommates get home I tell them the news. So I know it is possible. The beauty of eighteen year olds is that they are extremely easy to impress. Until now. If you would seriously like to be considered for the role. laughing inside at the thought of which of roommates would wind up with the fat one. a deck of cards. I will not post it in its entirety. Exactly three hours later she contacts me. what she's doing tonight Her looking at my roommates MySpace profiles Her telling me how hot they are Us making plans for tonight Now. if you're thinking that sounded too easy. 237 . Me telling her that one of her friends was too fat for my roommates. I have a friend Michael that cleans up online. Instead I will break it down into subjects. We plan the night. food (so that fat one doesn't drag them out to McDonalds before things get going) condoms. He pulls 3 or 4 girls a week off MySpace and Match. Boring small talk More boring small talk How hot I am What kind of piercing she has What kind of tattoos she has What she's doing tonight Does she have 2 friends Are they hot Me looking at friends MySpace profiles Again. and she will have to bring someone else. and that's about it. We will need: Beer. I leave out the small detail above. IM me at Bobbyrio03 on AOL. I'd say half the time he fucks them the first night.Social Superstar I will be at my computer for the next three hours. I just never had a need to bother with it. everything will be explained later. It was an extremely long conversation. A bit of information I skipped over in the subject matter. I hesitantly agree. I'm actually trying to get him to write a book on the subject. They are both very happy.

It must be done exactly in this order. I once again laugh. No one will ever know about this. one bigger than the next.The Best of TSBMAG. We learn a whole bunch of irrelevant information about these girls. Around 10PM we decide it is time to take this to the next level. And the drinking begins. The message has been sent. The horses are keeping up. the lights are dimmed. Take notes! Casual drinking Speed up the drinking with flip cup Pair off and speed up drinking even more with beer pong When sufficiently drunk suggest the game. My roommates look at me in shock. I decide the jacket should stay on until I put a few beers down. The horses love us immediately. She tells me it's cold. I shrug. We seem like great guys. And so it's on. I am breaking a pact that we made that night. I cringe. They are fat. There is Aimee (gothic horse). There is nothing gratifying about winning the affection of a horse. gothic horse is downright repulsive. There is Katie (horse). The three of us are communicating solely with eye glances. It will not be pretty later. We pretend to be interested. The doors are locked. They stampede in. I know what that jacket hides. While my horse is no prize. That's what you fucks get for not respecting my authority. Only my girl will not release it. We are all sitting at the dining room table. We turn our cell phones off. There is an instant decision to be made. By 9:30 we've become restless. Below is straight out of Bobby Rios playbook for banging girls under twenty. Never have I ever Begin sexual talk 238 . No one will ever know until I tell the world about it boys.COM 8:30 PM The piggies arrive. ha ha ha ha. I assume the role of gracious host. thinking about which one of my roommates will fuck her tonight. We will fuck them anyway. We are all thoroughly disappointed. we swear to each other while the horses take a piss together. We continually check the blinds to make sure no one can see in. We do the introductions. I take their jackets. The speed at which we are putting beers down at 8:45 on a Monday is frightening. And Kristen (shit smeller).

I let this fat pig ride me. I shrug and mumble something about drinking too much. But trust me. Her hand makes its way down my pants. We pair off. Oh. We wonder if she is going to swallow him. He wins the argument. I fuck the shit out of her. I hope you never have to do what I am about to do. yea. “You have amazing eyes. Then I blow my load all over her big fat titties. it is much easier to do the smooth transition with girls over a buck fifty. or that many beers. she has cuteness to her. Jake is with shit smeller. “Show me your room. We both win the battle as we watch Brian make out of with Gothic Horse. and I roll over and go to sleep. In the morning we hurry the horses out.” she whispers. I am a little jealous. I brush the hair out of her eyes. We kiss. Instead I continually point out to him how her nostrils are snared. And I had my first of many MySpace escapades. “You have an amazing smile. The kiss is oddly passionate. She looks perplexed. There is no thrill of victory with fat girls. lick my dick like it's an ice cream cone. Kids. And so the house finally got us laid. I am alone in the kitchen with horse now. I eat her pussy. it works on real girls too. I don't admit this. It is all just practice for the big game. I mean if you're going to do it you may as well enjoy it. I tell her how sexy she is. I do her doggy. In this light.” I tell her. He seems happy. 239 . the skinniest of the crew.Social Superstar Top the night off with Truth or Dare Get Laid Yes. We sit and brag about the poundings we gave them. we rationalize. I throw a pair of boxers at her to clean up with.” she tells me. He continually reminds me that my horse hasn't seen her hooves since the third grade.

12:30 pm I am not the only one in the bar. He is finally back from Vegas. Don't call so soon. vitamins. I throw a pair of jeans on and head to The Saloon for a beer. I wonder how she is going to be in bed later. but if you wait six days to call a girl after you get her number chances are she forgot you. I can hear the people out there saying. Here is some advice. 12:50 pm I decide that I do not want to spend my Memorial Day weekend with the kind of people who drink alone at the town pub. I tell him he should give it to 240 . The truth is when you get good at this shit you start writing your own rules. But you only got her number last night Bobby.The Best of TSBMAG. I hang up the phone and smile. These people have watched Swingers too many times. Now he wants to tell stories.COM Return of a Pick-Up Artist (Part 2) Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/09/2008 11:45 am The day began with a Powerbar. An indicator that she already put my number in her phone. water and a cool shower. I call Gloria. I am afraid that these old men have subliminally installed that in my brain. Yes. I contemplate putting in a few hours at the office. never show even the slightest sign of interest with old people. They will take it as an opportunity to spend the next two hours spilling their guts about a life gone by. We chat for a few minutes. I quickly scratch that idea. He is almost 70. It is a great movie. 1:15 pm I call Phil. He is approximately the 600th old man in a bar who tells me not to get married. 12:51 pm Gloria answers. buddy. Apparently there are other people who use Memorial Day weekend as a way to justify drinking in the afternoon. He tells me he thinks one of the hookers out there gave him the clap. She knew it was me. I make a friend with a guy next to me.

Here is a hint. I did not fret. unless she's a complete slut. what celebrities we'd like to screw and just when I sense the conversation has gotten too racy I bring it back to PG. Every time I guide the conversation to edgier topics she bites right away. 3:35 pm I have been doing a good job juggling the conversation between PG and R. She's got long wavy brown hair. Gloria is taking the ride with me up to Warren to help me assess Phil's uncle's land. 3:00 pm I have been in the car with her for thirty minutes and I have to say it's been a pretty pleasant experience. Maybe even thirty. Each time I test her she bites and brings the conversation even racier. I test her out and see if I can elevate it even further. you’ll have to be a little more creative. I get directions for some land up in Warren County that he wants me to do an appraisal on. pop culture gossip and just when the conversation hits a lull I throw out things like: coworkers who fuck. Every time I bring it back to R. dinner. The older the girls the more willing she is too elevate the conversation. Just kind of has that natural no make-up kind of beauty. Here is another hint. Who knows. if you want to fuck her the first night. She had a little bit of the hippy chick thing going on and I thought this would be a good way to get her juices flowing. Then I steer it back to neutral topics: work. She's got to be in her late twenties. There is a slight hint of age twinkling in her eyes. the first guy she kissed. Tell her you brought her a gift back. Younger girls tend to be more naive when it comes to talking about this kind of 241 . For your first date with a girl don’t go the standard coffee. drinks route. family. when we lost our virginity. Soon she is describing the first time she gave a guy road head. No. It's sexy though. 2:30 pm I pick up Gloria. I had put quite a few down at Bob's party and was a little scared I might get a surprise when she answered the door. if I blew my load this early the rest of the day would be a waste. maybe even fuck her in the woods. I started seeing this conversation going in a very good direction. Unfortunately we were about a minute from the land. She has been on that date a hundred times with a hundred guys. But she is actually even hotter than I imagined.Social Superstar Penelope. friends.

There is a tiny lake. I was not shy about touching her but now the touching was turning flirty. Like I'm a real professional under my bad boy exterior. I grabbed her hand and we walked around for awhile. I had her posing all over the place in all kinds of positions. There will be a time for that later. although this is only to make this trip seem a little more important. All the signs of an adventurous afternoon were there. The Kino has begun. Boards are over a door. suggesting something like that could freak a girl out if the rapport isn’t as strong as you imagined. Here is a hint. I don't mean be a meathead. Some girls just get so damn turned on by nature. but we got in that house/barn. This early in the day I was not going to take that chance. As cool as she seems. 4:15 pm A pack of wild sheep stroll in from the field in the back of the property. There is a small abandoned barn looking house.” Which was actually the look I was going for. So instead of giving up when I saw the bars over the door. I start snapping some pictures of them. She suggests that we check out the inside of the barn/house. and have very little tolerance for banal talk. Rising higher lower. There are only a handful of trees scattered around. 242 .com photo shoot. “Oh look how cute and professional you look. I pulled out the camera. I contemplated going for a naturalgirls. I put my clip board down. I made it a point to bust the fucking door in.The Best of TSBMAG. Use random opportunities like this to display some alpha male characteristics. Displaying raw power. Hands were getting left places longer. I wonder if there is an abandoned bed in there. She sees through my bullshit and calls me out again. I told her to pose. I walk around taking pictures. It took a few times and knocked quite a bit of wind out of me. The older ones eat this shit up. They are just as horny as you are. Fully clothed unfortunately. There was a bed but it was decrepit looking and I'd have preferred the floor. The look in Gloria's eyes when we see the sheep let me know that the juices are officially flowing.COM stuff. actually. I jot things down. All day hands were always brushing against each other. That way all these boring pictures of barren land will have something interesting to look at. but ultimately decided against it. 4:00 pm Phil's uncle's land is pretty barren. Caveman type shit. you just have to do those certain things women like to see men do. but she said it with the slightest hint of sarcasm.

but don't make the mistake of joining in the conversation because it won't lead anywhere good. If the rapport is good enough you can enjoy the silence together. She quickly pulled me out of the room and out of the barn. The silence is not uncomfortable. But she would like to cut my hair. She kept getting closer and closer to me until I could feel the warmth from under her jeans.Social Superstar I saw a room in the back that I decided would be the room. Our hands are in the middle of the table intertwined. A lot of times girls are just saying this shit to make themselves feel better about what they are about to do. Normally this look scares me. I kept nudging her toward the room chatting her up about the crazy ax man behind the door. She gives thumbs down. just kidding. To our surprise though three hawklike birds came flying at our heads. Another hint. I have a fucking fear of birds. I got behind her and guided her toward the door. she's not going to sleep with you tonight because she likes you or because you won't respect her in the morning. My racing heart and freaked out gestures definitely subtracted from some of that alpha male I had displayed earlier. What can I tell you? Luckily she was even more freaked. She tells me I should let her cut my hair. She's right. She runs her hand through my hair. It was definitely a buzz kill. as planned. We finally pushed the door open basically falling into it. I ask her if she left because of the birds. Give her time to think about how cool you are and a whole bunch of other reasons to justify fucking you later. I am genuinely enjoying 243 . Ignore it. She grabbed a hold of me. that I found myself a little flattered by the adulation. such a sexy at ease way. I ask her if she doesn’t like my hair. She is looking at me hard. She says sort of. but she just has this confidence about her. She left because if the birds hadn’t of come she was about to do something I probably wouldn’t respect her for tomorrow. I don’t say anything though. Don't respond with anything. She has gone googly eyed on me. 4:45 pm We are in the car on our way home. 5:30 pm We grab a quick bite to eat at a small Italian cafe near her house. I joked with her saying that someone was behind the door waiting for us. There is less talking then on the way up. when a girl throws out a comment like. Let them rid themselves of the guilt. Once you are at this stage use any excuse you can to get her touching you. Oh well. Don't always feel the need to keep the conversation going. Then she laughs and says. I probably wouldn’t have.

but it did make me pitch a tent with my smock as I got up to walk over the other chair for the haircut. I can't tell if she realized I was kidding. I tell her I have a foot fetish. She keeps touching the water and asking me if it's warm enough. I am aroused. The place is closed but she has a key. I want to open my eyes and look up at her. 6:17 pm The hair cut has begun. I watch hair falling off my head. Bobby is all around pleased with this one and gives her the Bobby Rio seal of approval. She asks me if I want a pedicure at the salon. This rates up there with a scalp massage I got from a pro in a termas in Rio a few years back. I look up and she is soaping up her hands.The Best of TSBMAG. Just thought I'd throw that in there so that you don’t think the only thing on my mind is sex. 6:15 pm I am sitting in a chair at her salon. and is basically manager of the place. I came from that scalp massage.COM her company. Now Gloria's massage was not going to make me cum. I wonder if I should try to hide this fact or leave it out in the open and see if she catches it. 5:50 pm We are in the car on the way to her salon for a haircut. and don't adjust. While I'm perfectly happy with my present haircut. But the bait worked and she telling me about a scene in another movie that turned her on. No joke. I ask her if she gets turned on by the toe polish scene in Bull Durham. She leans my head back into the sink and I wince when my neck touches the cold stone of the sink. when I was a little kid I used to get so turned on when the shampoo girls breast would brush against me during the wash that I couldn’t resist the idea of sitting in a chair watching her in the mirror. I decide fuck it. I appreciate the enthusiasm in which she is doing 244 . She leaned into me and a titty brushed against me. Finally her fingers start running through my hair. I wonder if it will make things awkward if I hate my hair cut. In the car ride I bring the conversation back into R territory. so no one will mind. Yes. She is sexually massaging my scalp. I mean how am I supposed to act if she really fucks it up? My attention is quickly diverted from my haircut to the mirror where I watch as all of her attention is focused on my head. I have towel choked around my neck and a restricting smock on. She runs water over my head. This is not as sexual as I imagined it would be.

I tell her and really mean it. My hands are running up and down her legs. people can see in. As soon as I say this she drops the scissors. At this point I am about to indulge myself in the details. Another hint: That was only the second time I complimented her all 245 . I spin myself around on the chair so that I'm facing her midsection. Just when I think I'm going to have to overcome another obstacle. I am extremely turned on.Social Superstar her job. And then the whole thing. She says we can't do it here. No panties!!!! God I love hippie girls. Make her feel like the luckiest girl in the world to hear it. My mouth goes down to her belly button area. I watch her wiggle out of them. She goes crazy. I smell her neck for a second and then turn her face toward me and start kissing her. I sense that she has come from the oral. I get on top of her and am kind of grinding into her. If you are uncomfortable reading about my sexual exploits you probably shouldn’t continue. she suggests we go into the back room. We stare at each other for a second. We are making out hard. I have no fucking clue what time it is pm I stand up and push Gloria down into the chair. Just enough muff to keep with the natural girl image. but trimmed up enough to still look edible. I help her with her pants. When you say something like that to a girl. I pull her head up and tell her again how fucking sexy she is. She can't pause for a minute. My mouth goes back in forth from her mouth to her neck. as they are fond memories. I do the lean back please me lean and await my reward. and then I pull her towards me. She turns me over and is practically ripping my jeans off of me. The unbuckling begins. She is extremely turned on. Which makes me wonder if I should tip her when she's done? I decide she will get a tip. In the back room there is a recliner chair where they do waxing and stuff. She's got the trademark hippie girl patch. I tease with crotch rubs. say it with all the confidence you can muster up. So I eat. She goes down on me and I am enjoying it way too much. She pulls me into her. I lay her down on the chair. 6:19 pm You are so fucking sexy. One good compliment can melt away any defense she might have still had up.

But we'll see… 246 . This is truly some of the best sex I've had in awhile. I know some guys would have asked her to spend the night. I easily could have spent the rest of the night with her. But you really have to wait to see where you want to go with this before you start getting so close. As much as I am into Gloria she's a little old for daddy and probably won't make the cut. Hint: Guys even if she's the fuck off the century don't get all gushy telling her how good it was or how much you like her. If in a week you decide you're not into them it is easier to start blowing them off.COM night. Lay there. Use compliments sparingly so that when you finally give them they will be regarded higher. 8:30 pm I drop Gloria off. put your arm around. cuddle like you're really into (it helps when you are) and be fucking silent. I wiggle my boxer briefs from around my ankles stand up and push her down on the chair. We are both breathless. I am inside of her now.The Best of TSBMAG. There is a glorious finale with an extremely satisfying cum. Trust me words are not necessary. I was really enjoying the time with her.

Although I tried to stay away from frat houses as I was trying to “make it in the real world” the offer was just too tempting. and whispered to each other that “if all else fails we take her upstairs and tag team her. I found her upstairs making out with one of the younger frat brothers. 247 . What was left of my confidence was officially shattered. She excused herself to go to the bathroom. As the night started to wind down I got hungry. The thought of hot young drunk college girls was enough to persuade me and my friend Jake to blow off work the next day and head out on a Tuesday night to relive some former glory. I stalked her out like the hungry wolf that I was. The mixer was with a subpar sorority and the talent pool was slim. I mean licking my chops. I waited for her about ten minutes. Still in a bit of a depression I proceeded to drink myself silly. In my drunken state I assumed we hit it off pretty well.” A few minutes later I noticed a chick that was cute (in relation to the other pigs at the party) and I went over and started conversing with her. and had just been dumped by the girl I thought I was going to marry. willing to fuck anything. We jokingly sandwiched her and danced a little.hungry. The party was less than spectacular. But worst of all… I just fucking need to blow a load!!! Some of my old college buddies were having a little get together at their house and invited me. My skills and confidence were at an all time low. I did the walk of shame back downstairs. Unfortunately my game was pretty bad at this point and I just kept talking about nonsense and wound up boring her to death.Social Superstar Snowballed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/21/2008 I was in the worst drought of my life at the time. At one point we were standing together sipping keg beer from our red cups when this sloppy fat chick starts trying to dance with us.. I was fresh out of college. At this point there wasn’t anybody downstairs so I just plopped on the couch and waited for Jake so we could leave.. When she didn’t return. Jake was in no better shape than me.

The Best of TSBMAG. swallowed and everything” Jake tells me. I am not going to lie and say she had any redeeming qualities. They were kind enough to head upstairs without making conversation with me. Stroked her hair. She had breath that made me want to puke. “If you’re still down we can do her porn style” “Dude. I was just with her behind the shed outside. 6 years later Jake is still asking me how his babies taste. But I kept kissing her and slowly slipping my hand down her pants.COM A couple minutes later the fat girl from earlier walks in the front door. I’ve got the fat girl inside half naked and ready to fuck” I tell him. I immediately got her on the couch. And a minute later I was lying on a dirty couch making out with her. I told the piglet I would be right back and headed out to my car to grab a condom. As luck would have it… the door opens again and a handful of girls walk into the house. These girls happened to be from my ex girlfriends sorority. As I was walking outside Jake was walking back in the house. Once they left. I figured all my dignity was gone. 248 . Told her she was sexy. I looked at this as a gift from god. She didn’t. the fact I got caught on the couch with a fatty by my ex girlfriend’s whole sorority. I may as well finish the deal. I just put my head down in shame. But I started dry heaving uncontrollably. They looked at me in shock when they saw me lying on the couch with the piglet. or the realization that I just made out with a piglet three minutes after she swallowed my buddies cum…. She gave me a killer blowjob. “Yo. and finally went outside and pulled the trigger… blowing junks all over the front porch. I don’t know if it was the 12 red cups of Bud Ice.

Mike and I were sharing a room on the same floor as the groom’s family. Against my better judgment I scanned my phone for some tail to call. I had fucked her once before. She was dressed high school whorish as usual… and got quite a few stares from the families of the bride and groom.” This only made her want me more. as Chris wanted us in close proximity to prevent any debauchery that would have had us over sleep the morning nuptials. I actually came before I got inside her… I caught my load in my hand and then pushed her off me and told her it was “too soon. where I slowly got drunk enough to realize I was wasting a perfectly good hotel room.. just drunk enough to make some bad decisions. The insurance policy came in the form of a pill of Viagra I scored off a friend for “extra measure. Since Mike and I didn’t exactly conform to the couple’s moral standards. Tammy was an eighteen year old senior in high school…. we didn’t see much of Chris anymore. The previous attempt at fucking Tammy’s ridiculously tight pussy left me with no alternative than to secure an insurance policy for the next time. It was a little surprising because our friend Chris had basically been “born again” after dating a very Christian girl for the last couple years.Social Superstar Hotel Room High Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/27/2008 Somehow me and Mike Stoute were asked to be groomsmen in a college buddy of ours wedding.. and my performance was less than stellar. A handful of us met at the hotel lobby bar. Not fall down humiliate yourself drunk. The rehearsal after party ended pretty early which left a lot of time to kill at the hotel we were all staying at. Chris gave me a look. and we're not talking about the sweet innocent type. but I was too 249 . Mike and I were sitting in the lobby when Tammy arrived. I stopped at Tammy. we wound up in his wedding party… The night before the wedding we all got pretty drunk after the rehearsals. Nevertheless. Tammy was a hostess at a restaurant where I was bar tending at the time.” The restaurant was a close knit group and I had a reputation to uphold… I figured I could get Stoute out of the room for a good hour while I gave Tammy the pounding she craved.

I just sat there waiting for Mike to leave so that I could get my grubby hands on Tammy. After getting the evil eye from just about everyone in the lobby. and shows them his left. The bald guy darts after him. They both looked at me to answer it as I was apparently the most sober. The three of us just froze. Chris. I let them knock another minute. Just as he gets finished telling us how big scumbags we are. while the three of just stared at each other in disbelief. they would have let us go. and the two of them entered the room. so Mike could roll a “cigar” that he and Tammy could smoke. Mike spots a dime bag on night table. I peeked through the little hole and saw a man in a suit standing next to a bald security guard. so when the two of them got together the entire room was a giant cloud. but the bald guy tackles him just as Mike reaches his hand out to flush the bag. Just as the two of them were finishing their second “cigar” there was a pounding knock on the door. The next thing I know Mike is barreling past them headed towards the bathroom. and pretend we don’t smell anything. Tammy was just as big a fan. Finally I slightly opened the door and peaked out. and I just shrug our shoulders. Tammy.The Best of TSBMAG. The men are not amused. They demand to see what's in Mike’s hand. If you’ve listened to Mike’s incessant coughing during our podcasts you could probably tell that he is quite fond of the green stuff. Then switches the bag and shows them his other hand. 250 . Mike. Then as the manager starts looking around the room. It is our friend Chris. The manager explains the situation and tells him to leave. The hotel manager opens the door. Mike starts pleading with them to not call the cops. They demand to see both hands. The bald guy takes the bag and demands for all three of to sit on the bed. They tell us that if he hadn’t been a wise ass. The bald guy pushed the door open. the three of us decided to go up to the room. He casually tries to grab it without them seeing. but the bald security guard catches him. The room is a cloud of smoke and the hotel manager starts harassing us about the smell. He is a corrections officer. there is another knock on the door. He is reprimanding us sternly. sniff around. Mike makes a running dive toward the toilet. But now the bald guy is pissed. The hotel manager calls down to the front desk and tells them to secure a police officer.COM drunk to give a shit at that point. Mike puts the bag in his right hand.

The hotel manager tells them the whole story with all the gory details.” Even the bald guy is little 251 . He then tells the bald guy to search the room to make sure we don’t have anything else in the room. None of us say anything. The hotel manager looks at me like I’m the scum of the earth. But he then says “I can’t leave this girl in the room with you two in good conscious. I apologize and promise that I will never ever see Tammy again. The manager tells us he’s not going to ruin our friend’s wedding just because we’ve decided to be fuck ups. Lucky Mike gets to stay in the room. “And I want you to be there with me when they arrive” he says to me. as Tammy and I get escorted through the halls by the manager and the security guard. We finally get down stairs where the four of us sit in the lobby waiting for Tammy’s parents to arrive. We pass various members of Chris’s family on our long walk to the elevator. shuts the door and comes back inside. The only identification Tammy has on her is her high school ID. Twenty five minutes later Tammy’s mom and dad show up. At that precise moment the bald guy pulls my pill of Viagra out of a pill case in my duffel bag. The hotel manager wants to know why a 26 year old has a high school girl in a hotel room that is filled with booze and other goodies. The bald guy has to hold Tammy’s dad back from striking me. He tells us “You’re friend may have just saved your ass. The bald guy wants to know why a 26 year old guy is carrying around a pill of Viagra.” His solution is to call Tammy’s parents and have them come to the hotel to pick her up. Tammy’s mom is grabbing her ear and calling her a “little tramp. He asks “Whose duffel bag is this?” I raise my hand. I have no answer for either one of them.Social Superstar seeing visions of two missing groomsmen and in no mood to explain what jerk offs his friends are to his fiancé. Mike and I hand him are licenses. The manager tells Chris to leave for a minute. He holds the little blue pill in the air and wants to know who has a prescription for an erectile dysfunction medication. he’s going to leave the police out of this. begs the hotel manager to not call the cops.” But he wants our names and some identification.

a hot cousin from Texas.COM uncomfortable with the whole situation. Everyone in the room officially agrees that I am the scum of the earth. I am having a blast. It will not be pretty walking into work on Monday. I am engaged in a great conversation with one of the bridesmaid. I sleep soundly that night. The wedding goes smoothly the next day. My cell phone goes off with three texts in a row.The Best of TSBMAG. 252 . 1st text from co-worker Trish “Old man need Viagra?” 2nd text from co-worker Kelly “Tell me she’s lying Bobby?” 3rd text from co-worker Jackie “Your dick only works for me daddy?” I turn my phone off.

I hope you find them informative and entertaining. I know its coming. Here are my adventures. It's hard to believe that it's been 10 years for me. Amazingly when I sat down to write it all came back to me crystal clear. Tracy is too drunk to notice. I know what he’s going to say next. Buff continues on… “…like six months from now… still feeling that sense of connection… and looking back at tonight as having been the start of it. At that very moment I know Buff is motioning with his hand from his solar plex to hers. The Early Years: Experimenting with Speed Seduction 1998 Buff is in the bedroom with Suzanne. I sip my beer. So I’ve decided to start a new series about the early years. I want to repeat it along with him. These were the craziest times because it was all so new and life transforming. I’ve got the nervous giggles. “Have you ever felt an instantaneous connection to someone? Like maybe as you’re sitting there looking at him… a cord of light grows from you to them” Buff’s voice is radiating from the bedroom. I’m waiting for Suzanne to burst out laughing.” 253 .Social Superstar The Early Days Experimenting with Speed Seduction Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/12/2008 I’ve wanted to write in detail about some of my experiences in the community for awhile now. “And as that cord glows with the warm of that connection… maybe you can even imagine a time in the future…” I’m lipping along with him. She flips over a card and tells me I have to drink.

“Yea… yea” I say. He is on his third date this week. “So where’s Buff?” “I think he’s working” I tell her. We are talking and laughing and smiling but we’re not saying much of anything. Ross Jeffries says “Those who look hungry never get fed. “Is he coming by after work?” she asks. “A little. She turns to kiss me. All that matters is that we don’t look hungry. Her face drops. She kisses Mike on the cheek. already drunk. 254 . Buff is notoriously missing. Mike and I are drinking Bud Lights and discussing the past couple of weeks.” she says.” Straight to the point she says.The Best of TSBMAG.” “Do I look hungry?” Mike asks. It doesn’t matter.” I tell him. comes over to Mike and I to say hello.COM My giggling causes beer to shoot out of my nose. “Pretend I just said something funny. Mike smiles at me. The Instantaneous Connection Pattern A few weeks later we are at Fatsos. “I love him. At least not much of anything that makes sense. Its college night and half of Montclair State is there.” Mike busts into laughter. Ross Jeffries says “A kiss on the cheek is supplication. He’s such a sweet guy. but I lean back and wave.” Suzanne. It is filled with “weasel phrases” and “embedded commands. I pat the index card in my pocket. “Are you alright?” Tracy asks me.

‘Imagine…me going down on you… all night long’” I say this staring directly into Angela’s eyes.Social Superstar “Not sure. “Okay” Suzanne says then walks away. “So I was just talking to Suzanne… and she kept repeating Buff’s name to herself over and over again. 255 . looks me dead in the eyes. But if it wasn’t for a tad of constipation I would probably not have made it past the pictures in the issue of Playboy I was browsing through. I head to the bathroom to regroup. then blushes. “Yea… It really took me back…I didn’t even know what to say. A clear head beats a beer buzz for confidence. He pulls me aside and says. “It was actually kind of scary. A life defining moment on the bowl You never imagine that your life is going to change while taking a shit. “The girl walks right up to. “Sweet Caroline” is blasting through the speakers and she’s trying to get me to dance with her. I pull out my index card and review the notes. The card reads “Use quotes” I walk out of the bathroom and bump into Angela from Sigma Kappa. who has a cult like following of guys all claiming that he can seduce any women in a matter of minutes.” “What?” Angela asks. I pour the rest of my beer in the pisser. “Really?” Angela asks. Instead I say.” I smile. “You wouldn’t believe what this girl just came up and said to me.” I tell her.” I say. and says.” he says. In the back of the magazine I stumbled across an article by Peter Alson about this ugly middle aged guy named Ross Jeffries. Just then Mike interrupts us.

The Best of TSBMAG.COM Alson weaves tales of lowly computer nerds scoring blowjobs from aspiring models and playboy bunnies in coffee shop bathrooms. 256 . I was immediately sold. Super Guru Pickup God Ross Jeffries has defied nature and figured out the secret to the universe.

She is hiking her yellow sun dress up to her waist. She is unbuckling me. my five o’clock shadow. Deanna puts something soft and damp into my hands. She climbs on top of me. With her other hand she cups the back of my neck and pulls my face toward her. “No… why?” 257 .” I say. Sometimes foolish men attribute their success to blind chance. my Sublime tshirts. Easily assignable to success. She puts her finger to my face and I put it between my lips. I was part of the crowd. and an insurance check paid a trip to Cancun I didn’t think I would be able to afford. tongues thrashing together. Other equally foolish men mistake coincidence for success. I’m free now and our mouths are locked. There was the time my car got hit by a van full of illegal Mexicans. my other hand is wrapped around the back of her neck. My baseball hats. I look to down and see that it’s a pair of her turquoise colored panties. Easily assignable to coincidence. Another time I called a radio station every hour on the hour until I won tickets to a Tom Petty concert.Social Superstar The Falling in Love Pattern Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/12/2008 “I don’t even know you. “All the better. Deanna clutches the lever of my seat and pushes me back. The seat belt has me trapped and our mouths don’t reach each others. For the first five weeks of our Creative Non Fiction class she didn’t know I existed. She is running her hand down my chest. my bloodshot eyes… “A typical frat boy. Tonight is a tossup. I’ve got one hand cupping her bare ass.” Deanna is whispering in my ear. I’m pinned down by my seat belt. “Are you wearing contacts?” I ask her.” is how she described me to her friend.

a Garth Brooks concert. Her tongue is cleaning out my ear. They had the ‘jump in and learn to swim’ type attitude with the stuff. I’ve got a tit smashed against my face. There were stories about a skiing in Vermont. Success or Coincidence? There was a moment of hesitation when the professor called on me to read my story to the class. This was the big go… Mike and Buff had been using Speed Seduction frequently since the cassette tapes arrived in the mail a few weeks back. Paris in the spring time… I wrote about the first time I fell in love… She’s straddling me and our pubes are rubbing hard against each other. “Do you think I’m pretty?” she whispers.” she says. the birth of a child. Success or coincidence? She’s fumbling with the buttons on my jeans. She reaches between our legs and wraps her hand around The Boss. She adjusts herself and guides me into her.The Best of TSBMAG. There is a reflection from the street light our car is parked under. “Tell me. a first trip to Yankee stadium. Horns are beeping. Her eyes roll back into her head. as she slides my jeans down. “Beautiful. 258 . Outside cars are passing by. Our assignment a week ago in class was to write a short story describing a memorable experience. a death of a father. I lift my ass. and her pale blue eyes are glowing like an Alaskan Huskies.” I say. The perfectionist in me always found it wasn’t quite the right time. Engines igniting.” I say. winning a spelling bee in the sixth grade. I mainly sat in front of my mirror reciting patterns and practicing tonality.COM “Just wondering.

You’ve already begun to feel that connection… and grow even more attracted. Deanna collapses on top of me.Social Superstar I am in Creative Non Fiction reading my story from the paper in front of me… “It was my third date with Shari when I realized what was happening. you just want to release them in a flood and I find when you do that now with me I find you just feel so enchanted like you are now under a love spell cast upon you such that you can’t control yourself and just find yourself going wild with it” Success or Coincidence? The Boss explodes. I’m getting a case of rug burn on my crotch. I am self conscious and a bit uncomfortable with what I’m reading… but it’s too late to stop. “And as you feel that passion growing more and more maybe to a point where you feel yourself just letting go completely as you allow this person to come deep inside releasing all those feelings that have been building and building up inside. You begin to pay attention in that special way. First. I put my hand over her mouth to silence her. The restriction of fucking in a Jetta is unsettling. that’s when you can make that connection…” The Falling in Love Pattern Deanna is grunting and growling. “You don’t even know why you just have to go deep inside and find all those values that are so important to you but you just naturally link them up with this person such that you find yourself beginning to look through the eyes of attraction … cause I find when you look through the eyes of attraction. Her eyes are closed which is good because a couple students are walking past our car. I see them peak in but continue walking. becoming aware… of the rhythm of your breathing… the beating of your heart… and that sense of growing fascination… such that as you continues to be aware of all this… one particular feature of the their face begins to rivet your attention… so as you just continue to keep looking… it’s like the rest of the environment disappears… and the entire world becomes this face…” I am keenly aware of the eyes of the class on me. It’s like you’re not even aware until it’s too late. look through the eyes of desire. 259 . I have to lift her a little so I can bounce her up and down on The Boss.

COM Don’t Buy the Cheap Sex Toys Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/22/2008 I’ve always been pretty experimental in the bedroom… dare I say… kinky.The Best of TSBMAG. or anal beads. I went with the anal beads for the low low price of $4. these are a series of beads attached to each other usually by a string with a handy retrieval ring. There was the time we lost the key to the handcuffs…. We were like a couple of perverts trying to see what we could come up with next. Only I had very little money. This place had everything I ever dreamed about. This was back when I was dating my first girlfriend Jillian. bondage. With the amount of money in my pocket. For all her flaws… I do say. I have a wild imagination. The package promised that if I inserted them into her ass… and 260 . The time I jokingly asked my ex to pee on me… and she did! The time I bought the super large dildo to play with on her… and then suddenly felt inadequate. Lucky for me. The Pleasure Palace. But nothing was worse than the time I cheeped out on the sex toys. There were a handful of items marked down for clearance. right from the start.. I’ve found girls willing to let me indulge in my whims. I wanted everything. my choice was narrowed down to a cock ring.99. edible panties. But what I’ve noticed while mulling over my exploits is that often these whims have turned out to end on a sour note. fruits and vegetables. For those of you unaware of what anal beads are. I was a kid in the candy store. she was gung ho in the bedroom. There was the time I took a roll of film of my ex in compromising positions… that mysteriously disappeared when we went to the CVS to pick them up. Role playing. voyeurism… we did it all. sue me. One day I ventured off to the holy grail of perverted fun. I spotted a discount shelf.. Luckily. blindfolds.

The string which had five beads going in… had come out with four. But I can be pretty persuasive. right? Jillian wasn’t thrilled with my new toy. As our session got steamier. Jillian starts making her "I’m going to cum" face. That was until I looked down at the string in my hand. I take this as my cue to start sliding the anal beads in. I quickly tried to hide the string under the pillow." Things started out amusing enough with the beads. She starts panicking. "What's wrong?" "One of the balls didn’t come out" I tell her. in and out. Wailing away. and usually felt dirty about it afterwards. so they went in without a fight. She jumps up and grabs the string from under the pillow. She reaches her hand around to her ass and starts holding her anus open while jumping up and down. She only mildly liked it when I did her anal. 261 . It is obvious that the bead slipped over the last knot. I sold her on the "new orgasmic heights. We tried them out in her vagina first. Worth a shot. I started poking my finger around her ass trying to warm her up to it. It doesn’t. I’ve got her legs spread over her head.Social Superstar then pulled them out right as she climaxed… she would reach new orgasmic heights. I was a proud man. In and out. By this time. But my face must have given it away. and she likes it. She squirmed a bit… but soon enough I’m digging away. She did a giant pelvic thrust… but then flashed me a reassuring smile to let me know she enjoyed. Just as the two of us reach orgasm I pull the string in one quick flick of the wrist. I’m doing her pretty hard missionary. They were still pretty lubed up from her pussy juice. I pray the bead will pop out. so I reach under her ass and grab the ring and get ready to yank. Jillian starts asking.

She starts hyperventilating. "You better get this fucking thing out of my ass. "It's right there." I say." She kneels down over the bowl and lunges her ass into the air. The grunts and growls that were coming out the bathroom would have scared small children. She’s making some nauseating faces and I have to leave the room. She begins pushing. I sit her naked body on the toilet and tell her to push like she constipated… push like she’s trying to get a baby out. I open the door and peak in." She looks like she’s going claw my face off. "Maybe you should try taking a shit. But nothing is falling out. I want to reach in. I say "Maybe we should go to the Health Center on campus." I take from her reaction that wasn’t an option. Now she’s crying so loud I can’t concentrate. Look and see if you can see it. and growling all over again. Jillian has her ass raised above the bowl and is shaking it violently. grunting. I take my two fingers and pry apart her anus. She’s screaming. I calm her down enough to walk her into the bathroom.COM If you remember from previous mentions of Jillian. "Push" I tell her. After a few minutes they stop. See if they have any suggestions. 262 . She starts pushing. but I am afraid I’ll just push it back further. I get behind her and start prodding around. I can feel it. she wasn’t the most mentally stable girl. "I feel it" she screams. Miraculously the little purple bead appears… but just as I’m about to grab it her anus closes shut and sucks it back in.The Best of TSBMAG.

harder this time" I demand. The bead plops onto the floor. She’s pushing so hard one of the veins in her forehead seems it's going to burst. I walk in the room and grab the string and flush all the beads down the toilet. is why you don’t buy the cheap sex toys.Social Superstar "Push again. my friends. I pick the thing up and flush it down the toilet. I’d have to dump her. And that. I’m really hoping a turd doesn’t pop out along with the bead. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" she screams. 263 .

But I’m thinking now… the older she is… 264 . My dick goes limp. Sofia could be 25 or 40 and I wouldn’t be surprised. 9:05 My girl gives me a little peck on my lips.The Best of TSBMAG. I beg one last time… “A goodbye blow job…please?” 9:25 I’m in the backseat of Sofia’s car and I’m trying to calculate just how old she is. 8:44 I’ve finally got some momentum going. I give up. my mind trying to hold a fantasy long enough to rub one out. And normally I wouldn’t have cared much. one of my girlfriend’s cousins… Anna and her big fake titties… then Sofia and her rebellious tomboy attitude… but the noise is just too distracting. c’mon other people need to use the bathroom” my girlfriend shouts in … Everything is fucked. Privacy is nonexistent. That’s what happens when you cram 9 people into a three bedroom apartment. I pull her close and grind my hard-on into her. She tells me not to be so grumpy and that I better have a good time tonight. She rolls her eyes and tells me no. The most action I’ve gotten all week in this chastity ward of an apartment. But just outside the door there are seven different Spanish voices continually reminding me that my time in the bathroom is limited. I finish putting on my shirt. I start unrolling some toilet paper to finish into… “Bobby.COM That Drunken ight in Medellin Story Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/18/2008 8:40 pm My dick is in my left hand… my right hand is fumbling through the medicine cabinet for some kind of lube… I’m squatting over the toilet. I float different pictures through my mind… first.

. We knock glasses and shoot them. and a slight bit creepy. Because in a brown eyed world… the blue eyed man is king. 10:00 Jim calls me over to him. I try pouring Sofia a shot. “Muy Bien! Mucho gusto!” He asks me why my girlfriend didn’t come. a banker… a cowboy. I explain that she had a wedding rehearsal … and has to get up early tomorrow for the wedding.Social Superstar the more likely she’d be up for doing something if something should happen to come up… 9:44 We get into the bar… it’s themed like a typical Colombian town. a nun. Each room with a different theme. “I no care” I say and fill the shot glass. There are three bottles of the stuff on the table. She shakes her finger no again. He hands me a shot. “I no like” she says in broken English. “Si” I say. And the town bum… 9:45 I walk through smiling… making sure they notice… And they always notice. She shakes her finger no.. Sofia notices my curiosity and says “Aguardiente. 9:46 I follow the cousins to a table filled with about eight or nine Colombians. I am doing the obligatory kiss on the check to bunch of chubby Spaniards… the loud alpha male of the group introduces himself in English. In fact. 9:51 Shot number one goes down smoothly. you like?” I smile. The room we wind up in is themed like a cathedral. . I smell the glass to make sure it wasn’t water. “So you can have some fun tonight!” he says. 265 . I lift the glass and down the shot myself. a farmer. I am happy that there will be at least one person I can communicate with here tonight.. The waiters are walking around dressed like typical town people… there is a priest. He puts his arm around me. “You like the Colombian girls?” he asks. His name is Jim.

Her sister wants to play dirty. I fill a few glasses and try to hand the sixteen year olds shots.COM 10:02 Jim calls over an old fatty. She doesn’t know how dirty I can get. My constant humping of her leg and staring at her tits has seemingly offended her… I put my tail between my legs and head back to the table. Sofia grabs my arm… and tells me in her adorable broken English to “slow down or I get too crazy” She’s probably right… but I’m past the point of reason. She doesn’t know daddy. For all intensive purposes I’ll assume it’s sixteen. I pour the three of us shots and we gulp them down. I start to wish I Googled the age of consent down here. It’s too loud to deal with language barriers. I’m a little embarrassed by my blunder. I push the glasses toward them again. Some young girls… that can’t be older than sixteen. I assume he is trying to hook me up with her… I give him the thumbs down. I want to make conversation. 10:11 I turn to Sofia. I try… but it’s useless. I fumble for the bottle and begin pouring another shot. My lack of rhythm is apparent. 10:14 I get back just in time for another shot. but nothing another shot of Aguardiente won’t cure. 10:13 Pretty soon I’ve made both of us uncomfortable. Things get ugly quick on the dance floor. They shake their fingers no. She takes my hand and leads me to the dance floor. Jim introduces me to the fatty… his wife. 10:18 266 . 10:16 There are a few new faces at our table. Sofia not wanting to be seen dancing with the gringo… pawns me off on her sister.The Best of TSBMAG.

. He actually pushes us closer together. Yea right!!! This is where things get blurry. Because when you can be loyal… that’s meaningful… So you’re going to go out there… drink your drink… be friendly… not too friendly. Here are the definite memories I have: … Gulping down another four or five shots of Aguardiente … Jim’s daughter shaking her finger no as I try to lick her ear …Jim’s fat wife pulling me off her daughter and then scolding her daughter in public Here are the fuzzy memories I have: 267 . Before I have time to explain… he tells me to dance with his's a moral test of yourself.Social Superstar Jim sees me trying to make conversation with the girls and comes over to us. Jim seemingly pleased… heads back to the table and leaves me and his daughter alone. 10:22 Time for a piss break. She is in the middle of us and I’m grinding lower and lower with her. and then you’re going go home and jerk off. He looks at the group of girls and nods at me. I look back at him over my shoulder… now he gives me the thumbs up.. As we are dancing Jim comes up behind his daughter and sandwiches her against me. 10:25 I regroup in the bathroom. And that’s all you’re going to do. I give him two big thumbs up. whether or not you can maintain loyalty. . 10:19 He introduces me to the sixteen year old… his daughter.

They are staring at me and laughing and pointing for me to go back into the hallway and to my own room. 268 .The Best of TSBMAG. I am completely dehydrated and desperately want water. Naked. He wakes up and flips out. naked. I close my eyes and go back to sleep. I momentarily snap back into consciousness and walk into the hallway. I decide to piss before going to sleep. I try to wake her up. I’m standing buck naked in the room where the aunt. on my bed. 9:20 am I wake up alone. Naked. I head back into our room. I have vague flashes of the night before… I panic. I retreat to my bed. Sofia and Anna are sleeping. Hearing his anger the aunt comes into the room and in Spanish intervenes. but thought of going into the kitchen to face the family is terrifying. I walk to the bathroom. I start to crawl in bed with him. Only they are not sleeping. (Most likely explaining that I’m a drunken mess who has no clue what room he is in… or probably even what country he is in) The two of them guide my naked ass back to my room. This time I wonder into my girl’s cousin Adolfo’s room. It’s not going to happen. I try for a few minutes to jerk off. Only I’m not in our room. I take off all of my clothes and demand sex.COM … Sofia pushing me into a car with a random Spanish guy … Driving through the mountains of Medellin thinking I’m being kidnapped …throwing up in a port-a-potty on the side of the road: Here is where things get ugly: I stumble into the apartment and stalk out my girlfriend. I go caveman on her. She is not turned on my aggressive drunken behavior… or my breath which reeks of puke. In the other room I hear the Spanish chatter of the entire family having breakfast.

269 . She asks me “What the hell happened last night” 11:53 I do the walk of shame to the bathroom. When I expose myself from the room… the entire family starts mocking me in Spanish. They are nice about it… but are openly amused.Social Superstar 11:40 My girlfriend wakes me up and tells me that I have to get dressed for her friend’s wedding. All I can think about was how pronounced the “shrinkage” was….

In order to fully experience and appreciate the lessons you’ll receive over the next 31 days you need to have a clearly defined end result..The Best of TSBMAG. Having a clearly defined end result means knowing exactly where you want to be 31 days from now. These three books all explore the ancient principle that your mind will create whatever reality you present it. building attraction. This step is more important than any lesson you will learn from here on out.. or any other area of your life… until you develop a clearly defined goal for yourself your mind will continue producing the same results you’ve always gotten. money. 270 . and friendship) the universe will continue to provide you a life of lack. managing a relationship. If you have had difficulty with talking to women. Have you read the book The Secret? Or how about Real Magic? Or Think and Grow Rich? These three books (if read and implemented correctly) are worth their weight in gold. This means that if you consistently think of the lack in your life (of women. How will you look after you’ve achieved better game? How will you act? What kind of girls will you be dating? Sleeping with? What will a day in your life look like once you’ve got this area of your life mastered? How will you feel? What kind of thoughts will be running through your mind? These are all questions that you cannot ignore.COM 31 Days to Better Game Day 1 Designing Your Life Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/10/2008 The first step you need to take to improve any area of your life is determining your desired outcome. money) the universe will provide you a life of abundance. The title of this series is 31 Days to Better Game… but “better game” has a different meaning for everyone reading this. But if you train your mind to see abundance (of women.

Clearly imagine the women and note the way you interact with them. Take a pen and paper with you. The idea here is to create a blueprint of the life you want. Then close your eyes imagine this reality. See your ideal life. You need to read this piece of paper and be instantly transported into that reality. Next Every morning when you awaken… take out that piece of paper and read it a few times to yourself. thought out.” If during your visualization you saw yourself having unbelievable sex with a perfect 10. You need to close your eyes and spend the next thirty minutes visualizing yourself as your Ideal Self. clearly defined. I felt the same way years ago when I was presented with this concept. Imagine clearly what you will look like. the thoughts running through your mind. It needs to be filled with emotions and feelings. Your Homework Everyone reading this needs to set aside one hour in a quiet place. But I’m going to safely say that it is magic. pay attention to the way you walk. I want you to trust me to give this a chance. As you run this image through your mind. feel like. summary of this new you. and act like once you’ve mastered this area of your life. the way your voice sounds. write ” I am having sex the girl I’ve desired” and so on. visualize yourself in the company of the woman you want to be with. suppose in your mind you saw yourself surrounded by a set of beautiful women and they were all laughing and having a good time… you would write “I am confident around large groups of beautiful women and easily create enjoyable conversation while building attraction. I want all of you reading this to put aside your personal opinions and judgments and reservations. Now I want you to write the most descriptive. See your ideal self.Social Superstar If this sounds new age and hokey… wait a minute. It needs to be as detailed as possible. For example. 271 . After you’ve spent about thirty minutes just completely immersed in this “new you” stop your visualizations and grab your pen and paper. Write everything in the present tense.

” Throughout the day try to remember to keep your self. I’m not asking you to approach 10 sets a night…. Lay there holding that image (with feeling) firmly in your mind. and a half an hour in the evening visualizing the life you want. Those that choose to follow this… I know that I will be hearing miraculous stories! If you want some further reading on this subject I highly recommend reading The Secret 272 ..COM The entire time you're visualizing this life… let your mind go. See if so real that it feels like you're dreaming. I’m not asking much.The Best of TSBMAG. There is no hard work involved. I’m just asking you to spend a half an hour in the morning.” Every night before you go to bed. The rest of you can keep your excuses I don’t want to hear them. “I am always meeting and attracting new interesting girls. Even if you deviate from your “ideal self” in your current reality. continue to talk to yourself in the positive. At the end of the 31 days I want feedback on this exercise… I only want feedback from those of you that followed it every day exactly as I’ve stated. Don’t slack. or remind yourself of your shortcoming or flaws… Clear your mind of the negativity and focus solely on “ideal life.. You will be tempted to let your negativity and doubt creep in and tell you this isn’t possible. repeat the ritual of the morning. I want each and everyone one of you to do this for one month.

Experience: When people ask me how I developed my “Rock solid confidence”.Social Superstar Day 2 Developing Inner Game Written by Cajun Originally Published: 06/12/2008 Inner game is probably one of the most popular subjects in the community. Inner game is also a topic that I think can only be discussed from a personal level. I’m going to get into both of these. can be attributed to one of these two areas. This is bullshit! To be scared of the possible 273 . So what is it? To me. Every problem you run into with not just women. that is. inner game problems boils down to two things: your experience and your mindset. only you can. I always answer the same. since it tends to be rooted in a lifetime’s worth of negative beliefs that are based on things like fear and rejection. but life itself. It’s only when were thrown into situations that are unfamiliar to us that we start to lose confidence in ourselves. and give some personal insights. I can’t convince you how to think or look at life differently. “Practice”. When you think about what confidence actually is you realize that it's simply doing something that you’ve done enough times to be comfortable with. and hope that you can learn from my experiences. It’s a major sticking point for nearly everyone who has trouble talking to women and it’s a problem that can be difficult to fix as well. The sad and somewhat ironic reality is that most men are not comfortable talking to women simply because they don’t talk to women! It’s a negative feedback loop that’s perpetuated by a fear of “what might go wrong”. so hopefully by the end of this article you’ll have a clearer understanding of what exactly it is that you need to work on to fix your own issues. but I can tell you how I overcame the very same problems.

and necessary part of the learning process.COM negative outcomes is to be scared of the very thing that enables you to get better! Think about it this way. Getting used to rejection isn’t easy. we create our own reality with our thoughts (Or beliefs. and it’s a game that a lot of people are scared to play. the sooner you can come to terms with it and move past it. Don’t be one of them. but you got on anyway because you saw how much fun all the other kids were having. it took me a while before I got used to rejection enough that I could understand where I went wrong. whether any of us actually exist or not is irrelevant. Life is a game. that our consciousness was independent of it…but recently this all changed. the outer circle being reality. We experience the outer circle. but the best advice I can give you is to simply accept it. That is. It’s possible. through our inner circle. Well this is the same thing. your own. or simply ignored. your reality. there may only be 1 reality. I remember when I first started out with this stuff I used to get drinks thrown in my face. reality. just accept that it’s a completely normal. 274 . even then you realized that the reward was worth the risk. The truth is. We are now learning through quantum physics that reality is actually the inner circle. What does this mean? As far as any of us know. writing this entire article out to send a message to YOU. don’t get mad at her or yourself. and the inner circle being our consciousness. don’t go home. when you were learning to ride a bike. our consciousness. The sooner you realize that rejection is a necessary evil. That is. or the world around us. told off. reality exists inside our mind. and that our consciousness is the outer circle. The first few weeks were rough. from your subconscious mind. Who’s to say I’m not a figment of your imagination. if you’d rather). were you too scared to get on because of a fear that you might fall down? Maybe. You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs.The Best of TSBMAG. Mind Set: Most of us grew up in a society that believed in a 2 concentric circle model of reality. This is how we believed reality worked.

like I said. The five senses are so accurately programmed that there is no detectable difference to reality. Think of it as your “console hack”" I’m sure you saw this coming. You become who you believe you are. and how they work. I can only give advice on inner game from my own personal perspective and this is simply how I believe reality works. and you will become one. all I will have to do is read this piece of paper and it will all come back. let’s say. Now. I remember because I had an epiphany that night and it was so mindblowing that I had to write it down as soon as I came home. 15 years from now programmers invent this computer game that is virtually identical to reality. and I know that if down the road I ever forget everything that I’ve learned in the past few years.Social Superstar I recently received an email from a student of mine asking about the power of beliefs. I replied with the following: “Think of it this way: what if. then all you have to do is believe that you ARE a rich Casanova. The AI is so smart you can’t tell it’s not a real person. let’s say. It has since become my mantra. In fact you can have. you get to play this game. I’ll end this article with something that I’ve never written about before: I remember the very night that I became good at attracting women. So. What does the paper say? “The secret to becoming amazing at attracting women is…to remember that you already are. Cajun.” Sound a little like the matrix? Well that’s ok. a rich Casanova in the game. The trick is you have to actually believe it. and be anything you want in this program as long as you ask for it using these “beliefs”. 275 .” Your welcome. and then the program takes care of the rest. but the programmer tells you some hints on how to play. if you want to be. he says this: “This software is programmed to work intuitively with your brain. but this “game” already exists and it’s called reality.

If you’ve seen the before and after pictures you know what a drastic improvement these simple steps made.” The phrase should have been worded “Looks only matter so much. If you look in the mirror and see things jiggling. If you want further information on designing a weight loss/muscle gain plan read this free personal trainer program-the site has like five hundred articles on every aspect of weight training and nutrition. but you will begin to feel much more attractive. I’m not saying that you have to look like David Beckham… but you know deep inside if you’re body can be improved upon. and change his wardrobe. there is no excuse not hit to hit the gym. What I did not include on that list but is equally important is maintaining a fit body. But you don’t need to be naturally good looking to make a good first impression. grow a goatee. hair style. “You’ve got to present your best self.The Best of TSBMAG.” I wrote a post a couple months ago called 10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive. hit the gym. posture and grooming tips. I highly recommend reading over that list. smiling. If you’ve read The Game you know that the first advice Mystery gave Neil Strauss was to improve upon his look. If you’re unsure of how to lose that extra weight check out this article about shedding unwanted pounds… if you’re looking to gain some muscle read this article on bulking up for the summer.COM Day 3 Updating Your Look Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published:06/13/2008 There is a misused phrase being tossed around in regards to attracting women… “Looks don’t matter.” There is no denying that physical attractiveness makes it easier for attraction to take place. get a tan. He had the less-thanhandsome Strauss shave his balding head. The list includes simple to improve areas like skin color. By just implementing these 10 tips you will begin to not only look more attractive. 276 . Like Strauss says.

More importantly is dressing in a way that promotes your self confidence. Although the article was geared toward high school students there is advice on creating your image that can be applied to all age groups. No matter what area of your physical appearance (if any) needs an overhaul there is more than enough information contained in this lesson to get you well on your way. Remembers just because “Looks only matter so much” you shouldn’t use that as an excuse to be lazy about your appearance. If you’re still looking for more advice than I would recommend purchasing Brad P’s Fashion Bible. Today’s Homework Today you need to make the necessary changes to present your best self.Social Superstar After you’ve improved upon the areas of your appearance that need some work… it's time to update your wardrobe. We’ve had a couple fashion consultants contributing articles to make your choices easier. I am not a firm believer in peacocking in the sense that Mystery and Style teach. If you still have questions regarding how to go about updating your life you might find an article I wrote for my How to Be Popular in High series helpful. Would you be attracted to a girl who isn’t doing her best to present herself to you? 277 . But I do believe in using clothes and accessories as a way to attract positive attention. If you’ve got little or no sense of fashion than read through our men’s fashion articles here at the site. The article also talks about creating a presence and takes quite a bit from the classic article The 7 Elements of Charisma.

They read books. study lines. and slept game.” It is so hard for them because all week they’ve created a pattern of bad posture. Is it because they are that much better salesman? No. It’s because a successful salesman is constantly marketing himself while the other 90% do their 9-5 in the office and call it a day. I spent this weekend with AFC Adam Lyons from Pua Training in New York. boring conversation. learn to “be alpha” but they sit in their house all week waiting for the weekend to practice game. He didn’t wait until heading to the clubs at night to go into game mode. No matter who he was talking to he was projecting the same charismatic personality. If you’ve just read an article about flirting. start 278 . Does that mean all you should care about is game? Hell no. poor tonality. Always dress to impress. Always be presenting your best self. A lot guys wonder how come some nights it is so hard to get “in state.” And he’s right. breathed. then they expect to miraculously be the life of the party come Saturday night.The Best of TSBMAG. Always be opening sets. approach anxiety. Always be chatting up strangers.COM Day 4 Always be Advertising Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/16/2008 In a common sale’s office 10% of the salesmen make 90% of the money. Always strive to make your conversations memorable. If I had to name the most inspiring thing I got out of the weekend it was Adam’s ability to always “be on. The biggest mistake most guys tend to make while trying to improve their game is they think that it only counts when they are at a bar or club. He lived. It just means that everything you learn needs to be implemented at all times. Every lesson that you learn throughout these 31 days needs to become a new habit in your life.” Adam made the comment several times that he “is game. and AFC tendencies….

Always leave the house expecting to meet the girl of your dreams. Once you get in the habit of always reinforcing the skills you’ve been learning. you will find that it becomes a lot easier to get “in state” since you will be spending most of your time in the right frame of mind. is that you will find. More importantly though. Your co-workers who used to ignore you will be asking you to come hang out with them. like the most successful salesmen. that the best leads come when you least expect it. The counter girl at your local bank will be dropping you IOIs. I don’t care if you have to flirt with your sixty year old neighbor…. Because you just don’t know when you will bump into her.Social Superstar flirting immediately. you need to always be reinforcing these skills. If you’re always “on” you’ll find that you’ll naturally be attracting more women into your life. 279 .

Because with “high status” comes most of the traits women desire in men like security. fame. …yes. it will make the life of her kids better and even make her friends jealous and envious. act and by their body language. power. wealth. In Wisconsin we deer hunt and my Dad always told me to never cough because a deer’s hearing is much better than a human’s… Well a woman’s “status” senses are far superior to a man’s. women are actually very competitive with each other but in more subtle ways than men… 280 . clothes. Now you might ask why “status” is so important to women. cars and made them wear a disguise.COM Day 5 Being High Status Written by Mack Tight Originally Published: 06/17/2008 I was reading Bobby’s recent post “Never Show Emotion When She Walks Away” and all I could think was “could that dude make it any more obvious that he was low status”? Let me explain… When you think of “high status males” who do you think of? Donald Trump… George Clooney… Kobe Bryant… your favorite politician… Now if any of these guys had an attractive girl make out with them and run off would they set around and pout like a tit baby about it? Fuck no… They are flooded by a large quantity of attractive women in their life… and even if you temporarily took away their money. any woman would still be able to read that they are high status within minutes of meeting them by the way they talk. Not only will landing a guy like that make her life better. social acceptance and notoriety.The Best of TSBMAG.

if you go to a car dealership to deal on a car. the attractive women are going to have a harder time landing this guy’s business. There was a term called a “common” for sports cards of a player no one wanted. you always want to give them the impression that there are other dealerships that are in the hunt for your business… 281 . “Commons” were ummm… common… …don’t be a common! The guy in Bobby’s story showed to everyone in the bar and most importantly to the girl that he was a “common” by gawking at her and pouting. This raises his status to them. If on the other hand you don’t give a shit when dealing with a hot girl you’re showing your supply is low and your demand is high. It is quite obvious that an attractive girl kissing him was a “big deal” and a rare occurrence in his life… That made it quite obvious to everyone that he was “low status”. Here’s another analogy from my childhood… When I was a kid I collected sports cards. Now similarly. Now if a guy’s supply is high and demand low and attractive women is the commodity. Supply and demand is not unique to women and men either… Why is gas $4 a gallon? Supply and demand! Why are diamonds so expensive? Supply and demand! (Thanks to DeBeers) It is like your status is a publicly traded stock when you go into a club and your every action makes it go up and down in value.Social Superstar So how can women sense your status? They can sense your supply versus your demand… If you are clingy and needy it shows to them that you have a low demand and a high supply.

The Best of TSBMAG. 282 . Always give the impression that you have options in your life even if you don’t. I want to fit in and I’m scared to stand out”! That’s what “peacocking” is all about… having the balls to stand out… …and I’m not talking about even wearing goggles and a fuzzy hat. For example. I had women cold approaching ME about the shirt and I went to town from there. Negging “Negging” is defined as saying something to an attractive girl that subtly shows her that you are not caught in a hypnotic trance over her beauty. some like dogs and cats but I LOVE MONKEYS! I had guys busting on me about it but I could HANDLE it. I recently bought a bright green Paul Frank t-shirt with Julius the monkey on it. some old carpenter pants and a boring t-shirt of your local major sports team screams “I’m high status”? To me it screams “I don’t care how I look.COM If you go to a job interview you want to give the interviewers the impression that there are many companies of courting you… …you are living in a world of opportunities and abundance. I bet everyone of those douche bags who were busting on me went out and bought the same shirt the next day… …but I have a feeling they had no luck with it because they could not properly handle the reactions. What can I say. I even had some girls who BUSTED on me just like the guys did but I was able to turn the tables and get attraction from them. High status men do not care what others think. Now let me switch things up and touch on some community concepts that hit on the “high status” point… Peacocking Do you think wearing a pair of Sketchers.

Basically you are showing her that in a sea of low value ass-kissing chumps you are the one prized high value man who is accustomed to interacting with girls of her level of beauty on a routine basis. She is accustomed to being put on a pedestal by guys staring at her. VERY subtle comments that could be taken as a backhanded compliment. Sure. take Mystery’s “its funny how your nose twitches when you talk” or Neil Strauss’ routine of picking a piece of lint off a girl’s shirt. some examples involve VERY.Social Superstar Calling it “negging” was a bad move because people outside of the community assume it is just about putting down women. You need to differentiate “negging” from being an obnoxious asshole. Many people who are new to the community do not understand how to calibrate proper negging. Do you think a rock star that is in town for a tour is going to barrage a girl he just met with a bunch of interview questions? What’s your name? What’s your age? Where are you from? What is your job? HELL NO! For him to ask such personal questions to a girl with them both knowing he will be in a different city the next day would be silly. It may sound mean but women WANT to come off their pedestals to meet a high value man like yourself! Giving/Taking Value I made a post a while back by Mehow about giving value by being the value. He might bring up some stories about something crazy that happened at his last tour stop in New York City. buying her drinks. It is not like you are calling the girl a “bitch” or saying she is “ugly”. It does a good job of differentiating how needy and high status guys communicate with women. For example. Instead he is probably going to vibe with her about cool things. Maybe they’ll talk about music or pop culture. 283 . endlessly approaching her and showering her with complements… …but you quickly knock her off the pedestal to defuse her defenses.

It’s casual. Mack Tight 284 .The Best of TSBMAG. So there you go… I hope I did a good job of explaining high status to you. The key is that quality women only have limited opportunities to interact with truly high status men. so it is completely worthless! High status men want to test women before they even care about their personal life. I also hope my examples gave you some ideas on how you can raise your status to women even higher. So show them that you are high status from the start and you will make yourself the exception and not the norm.COM Guys often interact with beautiful women by asking endless personal questions and they usually never end up seeing or talking to the girl EVER AGAIN anyway. A high status man has many options with quality women just as a quality woman has many options with low status men. ONLY if the interaction progresses to the point that it EXCEEDS his normal standards does he care to learn the back of baseball card stats of a girl’s personal life. They begin by building comfort and attraction by telling interesting high value stories (such as the rock star’s crazy night at his NYC tour stop).

well. To this day. If you’ve ever been talking to a woman and thought to yourself. But let’s learn how to flirt. somehow. I wasn’t exactly a huge hit around the college bars in Ann Arbor. I’m even boring myself!” then you know exactly what I’m talking about here. There’s nothing worse than a girl who. surprising and rewarding each other. Its two people talking about… anything they want (it definitely does not need to be logical)… and pushing.I was completely stilted when you’d throw me into a bar full of people my age. lame. Flirting is conversational play. that’s fine – you’re in the company of many other men. Needless to say. surprise… it is how you might communicate with your lawyer or your professor. so much as it is that they are worried the conversation will flatten out and get boring. The inability to be fun and flirtatious is one of the most common problems that men face when they’re learning to get better with women. it is not necessarily because they are afraid of getting rejected. initially. “man. she was bound to be attracted to me.Social Superstar Day 6 How to be a Good Flirt Written by Christian Hudson Originally Published 06/18/2008 I was a very boring guy until I turned about 22. pulling. hitting it with a bend. once a girl sensed how deep and concerned about the real world I was. only to see her attention wane as the conversation starts to get.”. I like to think of it as taking a flat note. emotion. economics and business. And listen. if you never learned to communicate any other way. and add some much-needed texture to the conversation. A flat conversation is one without any spark. MI. seems to be enjoying her time with you. My interests used to lie exclusively in history. Flirting is YOU and HER – your personality and hers – sharing some basic information and making it more fun. While they may have some approach anxiety. 285 . I thought that. it is issue number one amongst the clients with whom I work. and while this proved an asset in my talks with “adults.

BORING CONVO F: So where are you from? M: Right. (Little reward for playing along). Nope. (Now. saying quietly)… but you can’t tell anyone else. Let’s consider a few tweaks. building up anticipation. it was a good place to grow up. Now. M: Cool. It's just outside London. We’ve made a little game 286 .The Best of TSBMAG. but we’ve texturized it with some personality. our man is relaying facts.” to “that’s too hard” – we’ll use one of those in a later example). F: Stains… what’s that like? M: Ok.COM and running it through a flanger. promise. so check it out… What have we done here? We’ve conveyed the exact same information. This conversation is as flat as a deflated blimp. and probably not even as interesting. I’m from Stains. uh… Stains. (Here you’re creating a little game – more fun) F: Ohhh. How about you. But perhaps an example is in order. You know. and say) Promise? F: Ok. where are you from? Here. You get the Silver Star. I’ll tell you what it's like… (here you’re “headlining” what you’re going to say. DULL. I’m from… guess where I’m from. step back. (Note: there are about a million responses she could have here. London. put your hand on her shoulder and lean into her ear. M: Ohhh! So close. look her in the eye. ranging from “I don’t know. Key point: the girl is not having FUN sharing this information. F: Ok… how is it there? M: It’s pretty nice. FUN. INTERESTING CONVERSATION F: So where are you from? M: Hmmmm. ahhh. Swooosh – instant texture.

Social Superstar of getting it out of you. you’ll be golden. One option was to say “Are you qualifying me already?” which girls usually take as offensive and which. needless to say. and the process of sharing information. so let’s consider another example… a girl asks you what you do. (And she’s not pleased about it!) M: Ok. and as long as your delivery includes some warmth and a smile. but there’s no algorithm for knowing which – you just need to practice and develop a feel for it. after coaching him on how to rock the second one. a lot more FUN. he was doing a lot better with the ladies. It could be anything. I used to answer this question in one of two ways. because I’m not being truthful. (She’s going to have to work harder than her lame ‘How to Separate the Duds from the Studs in NYC’ guidebook told her she would) F: I don’t know.subtle frame control. shuts down the conversation. I want to add too – you don’t have to be a dancing ape with your delivery on this one. Think Happy Californian Stoner/Surfer. So what’s a fun way to stand out when a girl asks you this question? F: So what do you do? M: Hmmm.but most importantly. I’m a…. The other thing I’d say was something like “I’m a garbage man. about how to tell if the guy they’re talking to is going to treat them to Per Se dinners and weekends in the Hamptons.” You can be totally chill. as you’re getting away from the question at that point). screening and qualifying . punished them for asking me about myself. This is literally the first question out of the mouth of every girl you meet here in NYC. 95% of the time. there must be a book that girls receive when they move here. guess what I do.” which is obviously a lie and which. it's made the conversation. These exact conversation fragments happened with a boot camp client not long ago. tell you what… (thinking)… I’ll give you three options. There’s a whole mess of other things going on in here . (I wouldn’t play a “reward/punishment” game here if it's early in the conversation. or have some other presentation style that just smacks of “seduction community. That line works with certain girls. Too often. 287 . act gay. our models of fun behavior and delivery are guys who are way over the top. Ok.

Here’s the flat. And so on. so I’m going to guess option 3. (Give her a little hug) F: Wait what do you mean partial credit? M: Well… I’ve actually done all three. one way you might want to present it is to throw in your job. F: Haha. exactly. right… M: Option 3: I run a software company that builds security software for biotech firms who want to protect sensitive data from being stolen by insiders (sounds legit. boring version: 288 . you’re like… kind of right! You get partial credit! That deserves a hug. M: Wow. you’re wicked smart. the way that you present something like this may vary. too complicated to be a lie) F: Okkkkkk… that’s tough. right? But you’ve got the power of your copious intellect. This is a conversation I have. M: Ok. (Lots of detail. frequently almost verbatim. option 1… I run a beverage company that produces and markets caffeinated gelatin shots in little one ounce packets. interesting) F: Ahhh. and helps me avoid talking about the coaching stuff because I’ll steer it into talking about jello shots or software.e. described very interestingly. described as if they were jobs (i. it's time to ask the girl what she does.The Best of TSBMAG. Of course. along with two hobbies. fun. that sounds good.COM F: Ok. M: I know. Damn. ok… M: Option 2: I consult with men on their lifestyles and communications skills – kind of like Hitch – to help them meet cooler women and have better social lives (too ridiculous to be true – or is it?) F: hahahaha. F: So you’re an entrepreneur! M: Yeah. but no kiss on the cheek yet. if you play guitar you could say “I’m a musician working to get his first breakthrough demo track laid down). Now.

So what can you do with that?! Well… M: So what do you do? F: I’m a technical designer for Jill Sanders M: Wait a minute. no you’re NOT. How’d you get into sales? See? Creating this playful tension. Same information. (Smiling as if she just made your day when she told you that) F: Wait. Tell me about it. She has FUN telling it to you because the conversation itself is a little series of surprises.? M: Actually. some fun?” then you’ll find yourself flirting pretty effortlessly. no you’re NOT.? M: Ah. 289 . But if the attitude you take with you into your interactions is “what would give this conversation some texture. But it sounds exciting. I just don’t have anything good to relate. We’ve barely scratched the surface in terms of all the techniques you can use to flirt. uh… what’s that? I meet girls every day and they tell me they do something that I’ve never heard of. but with a more common job: M: So what do you do? F: I’m a sales representative for [insert big faceless company here] M: Wait a minute. Let’s consider another example. I’m just messing with ya. More often than not. OutOfHere. M: Ok. (Smiling as if she just made your day when she told you that) F: Wait. OutOfHere. And ultimately. more texture. why (she’s probably smiling now too)…. Get. this texture. why (she’s probably smiling now too)….Social Superstar M: So what do you do? F: I’m a technical designer for Jill Sanders. immediately. to what a girl does. this is what flirting is all about. Get. makes a girl feel much better about sharing information with you. more playfulness. I have no idea what a technical designer is (both laugh).

) and stay away from the classic Mystery or Strauss “who lies more” or “what 80’s pop duo should I name my dog after?” I’ve found that guys who are using these elaborate canned openers are getting stuck in routine mode and not going on to develop natural conversation skills.up artist to come out with an innovative. The reason these approaches are the best is because very little thought is going into the interaction. You’re mentally in the wrong state. I recommend having a couple canned openers ready for different situations… but I would keep them simple (hey. But there are perfect ways to approach and deliver your opening line. Most of the times these girls will be expecting you to open 290 . But that's just my opinion. An opener is just the first thing you say to start an interaction. Personally. make you look cool.. The easiest girls to talk to are the ones you're standing closest to. ideally it will make her laugh. fail proof. are you guys friendly?. guaranteed to work opening line to say to a woman.COM Day 7 Simple steps for Successfully Approaching and Opening Women Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/19/2008 I think most guys are waiting for some new pick.The Best of TSBMAG. BAM! You see a woman you want to talk to an immediately initiate a conversation. Don’t hold your breath. there is no perfect opener. The less thought out and planned an interaction is the more natural and relaxed you will appear. When it comes to opening girls I’ve found that several things will make all the difference. Proximity. Once you start scanning your mind for things to say it's over. 1. This is why in the beginning a lot of coaches recommend using canned openers. The best approaches are spontaneous. But the fact is. and create conversation that just flows from it. Yes.

If you open a girl and the whole time you’re talking to her she’s fumbling with her cell phone and avoiding eye contact… don’t waste your time. Remember not all girls are super outgoing… some girls need a little prying before they open up. I see too many guys open a girl with a funny line… then immediately go into “interview mode. You want to make sure your body language conveys the image that this interaction carries no excess value to you. Even if you just say “you girls look like you’re ready for a fun night” give them cheers with your glass and then go back to talking to your friend. You have to differentiate between a girl who visibly giving you signals of disinterest… and the girls that just take a little more work. (And build social value) 3. 5. 2.Social Superstar them. This will put you in the right frame of mind. 4.The reason spontaneous approaches work the best is because your body language doesn’t have time to get all weird and up tight. On the other hand. if you get a tad resistance. That is the beauty of the three second rule. Open as many people around you as quickly as you can. and is probably bored. don't prematurely eject.” Once you’re in interview mode she knows you’re hitting on her. If you’ve entered a bar. Stay Fun. and you’re in the proximity to a couple girls you want to talk them immediately. There are entire books on approaching but sometimes it's the simplest advice that is most practical and easy to implement.Once you’ve approached and opened girls keep a really fun vibe. Body Language. I hope that these tips help next time you’re out. The best approaches feel spontaneous. Bobby 291 . Spontaneous. You also want to present the image that you could turn and walk away at any time. Because the approach was spontaneous you will be sending off really natural body language. Know when to eject and when not to. As you walk into a venue scan the room for the best possible spot. The longer you wait the more awkward it's going to be. Now they’re opened. You’re better off staying playful for awhile. You don’t want to be the guy doing laps all night with the hungry look on his face.

the other night I was talking to a girl at a bar. actually I imagined it was a job on Wall St. Using the material she gave me “the mix of excitement and fear” I was able to transition into another thread. After you’ve approached a woman and have broken the ice with an opening line… you need to hook her into the conversation. You need to get her to invest some interest in talking to you. talking about how Intel is down a point?” From there the conversation flowed naturally because I avoided interview mode. I guided her along.. The standard question that most guys would have asked next was “how do you like the city?” Instead I said. I’m a finance geek.. Here she brought up the emotions she felt of excitement mixed with fear. you’re here because as a child you had bright lights big city dreams… you imagined yourself strolling down Fifth Ave.COM Day 8 Improving Your Conversation Skills Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/20/2008 The goal of a conversation is to connect with the other person on some level. 292 .” “So you imagined yourself in a power suit… doing lunches with the Gordon Gekko types. For instance. swinging your briefcase on your way to your job in advertising…” At this point she stopped me and said… “Ha-ha. She told me she just moved here from Iowa. “So..The Best of TSBMAG. How do you get a girl to invest some interest in the conversation? One of the easiest ways to elicit a response is to make assumptions about her and funny guesses. When that thread died down it was easy to transition into another interesting topic.” “So tell me what your first week in the city was really like” I asked her. and I asked her if she lived in the city.

Social Superstar “Well aren’t the most satisfying times in life the times you feel that adrenaline? It's like when you think of your most memorable vacation… it probably wasn’t a vacation you sat in a beach chair sipping Pina Coladas. her first month here) Each time she gives you a hook you should relate it back to her establishing a connection. and explained the emotion I felt of “being lost on this entirely different continent.. arriving in NY...” We were able to smoothly transition from “Do you live in the City?” to having a detailed conversation about our most adventurous vacations.. that sounds like a good story. (Leaving Iowa. yes… being stuck in France not speaking a word of the language.. It was probably one where you challenged yourself a bit…” “Haha.. A hook is something she says that you can use to extend the conversation.... and how it almost brings you back your childhood when things were still new… and you had that desire to explore. When she told me she just moved here from Iowa a month ago she gave me three hooks to work off of. out of money” “Oh. do tell!” See how the conversation is naturally flowing from one thread to another? After she spoke a bit about her adventure in France I told her about my first time in Brazil. If you’re listening to her you’ll notice a new hook every time she opens her mouth. The biggest mistakes guys make is turning the conversation into an interview… take the conversation above and see how easily it could have headed into interview mode: • • • • • me: Do you live in the city? her: I just moved here from Iowa me: Oh yea. so what do you do? her: I’m a stock broker me: where do you usually hangout? 293 . The key to being a good conversationalist is to keep your ears open for hooks.

• • me: tell me about your most adventurous vacation. didn’t speak the language.COM See how easily the conversation could have turned into a high pressured interview if I hadn’t used what she gave me and related it back to her. That I was able to empathize and understand her. • • • • • me: Do you live in the city? her: I just moved here from Iowa me: Really. I dabbled with stocks online a little. Here is an example from my conversation of how I took things deeper.. You also want to stay away from “try hard” relating. her: It was this time in France when I was dead broke. 2. and alone for two days wondering around Paris.The Best of TSBMAG. This is actually a technique I learned from Richard La Ruina’s book The Natural Art of Seduction where he talks about taking things deeper. me: So you must have felt both the thrill and fear of complete anonymity. 294 . I was really listening to her. This is where everything she says you try to find away to immediately relate to it. 3. me: Oh yea. I have a friend who went there on vacation last year. What do you do for fun? In the example above you’re wasting valuable hooks by trying to fill the air with pointless banter about yourself. So what does one do when they know no one will find out? • See how I acknowledged the emotion that she must have been feeling. What do you do? her: I’m a stockbroker. This simple acknowledgement let her know that: 1. Who cares that your friend went there on vacation? The proper way to handle a hook is to relate it back to her. That I was genuinely curious to know what one does when they know no one is watching.

Because now she knows that you’re on the same playing field. 295 . She knows that you’re not superficially trying to relate… This is a conversational strategy you should take on no matter who you are talking to. The easiest way to break an old habit is to consistently implement a new one.Social Superstar Once you’ve acknowledged what she has given you it is alright to relate the story to yourself. Instead of waiting for attractive girls to practice this new conversational strategy I would suggest practicing it with your friends. family. If you get in this habit you will naturally become a better conversationalist. Practice picking out the hooks these people are giving you. and coworkers. and then practice acknowledging the hooks. Many of us have old habits that we’re going to have to break.

My answer is…it depends on your conveyed status.The Best of TSBMAG. The more comfortable you get with your game. Daytime Drills One of the biggest problems men have with building comfort with women is that they put too much emphasis on the moment of truth. you want to get skilled at knowing how and when to use compliments and direct game as well as using negs and indirect game. however. I hope you guys enjoy it and find it helpful. Until you reach that level of game. treating a woman like a queen is not a sign of weakness as long as it’s crystal clear that you’re the king. which is even higher. One of my rules has always been that it’s all right to put a woman on a pedestal so long as it’s made clear that you’re on the throne. Picture yourself as 296 . physical appearance. If there’s any possible doubt as to your status versus her status. Or to put it another way. which is the moment of interaction at the bar or club. This is just a sampler of techniques you can use to build comfort with women and isn’t meant to be an exhaustive list by any means. you will probably want to lean more toward indirect game and playful teasing and insults. Two things I hear guys ask about when it comes to building comfort with women are (1) whether to go indirect versus direct with the game and (2) whether to compliment or playfully insult the woman.COM Day 9 How to Build Comfort with a Girl Written by T Originally Published: 06/23/2008 Bobby Rio asked me to shed some light on building comfort with women. sure you can compliment a woman upon first meeting her. social proofing and/or manner of speech are strong enough to convey higher value from the moment you walk in the door or open your mouth. however. Eventually though as you get more comfortable with your inner game and alpha role. it’s always better to start in the beginning with a little more indirect game and use playful negging and teasing to bring down your target’s status in relation to your status. If your body language. the easier it will get to convey that you’re an alpha male and a prize with hardly any effort.

take mental notes on what works and what doesn’t. you don’t have to get a number or pick a woman up. You’d practice by yourself for hours when nothing is on the line and not a lot of people are watching. When you do this. Ask a woman for her opinion on a cologne or article of clothing you’re considering buying when you’re shopping at the department store. Don’t fall into that trap. Chat with a cute bank teller while she’s handling business for you. You’d do visualization exercises. In fact. it’s even more important to make notes on what does work so that you can repeat it and fine-tune it. The same applies for building comfort with women: practice when it doesn’t count and when no one is watching and you’ll be way more confident and perform much better during game time. If you’re stuck on a long post office line behind an attractive woman. the more you realize that it won’t kill you and that 297 . You’d run drills. that’s an opportunity for conversation. You’d take shot after shot after shot in your spare time. pat themselves on the back for it. A woman sitting next to you on a bus reading a book you’ve already read is an opportunity. Start a conversation every day with a different attractive woman. and forget to ever repeat that joke or story again. go for five minutes. Imagine how nervous you’d be. but you never practice or touch a basketball except during big games in front of a large amount of people. say a basketball player. With these drills. Make small talk with the Starbucks barista when waiting for your coffee. You achieve that. You’d never do that. The point is to get comfortable starting conversations with women and to get comfortable with the occasional rejection. When you do these daily conversations in the beginning you’re just aiming to get used to the banter and to reduce the anxiety you get from having conversations with women. It’s not enough to make a note on what doesn’t work for the sake of avoiding repeating the mistake. The whole goal is to get comfortable talking to women you don’t know. And by the time you hit the big game you’d feel a lot less pressure on yourself because you mentally prepared yourself for this moment. Then go for a minute. the more you get rejected. Aim for 30 seconds. A cramped subway car is an opportunity. Imagine how off your game would be. Women’s defenses tend to be down more in these casual daytime situations than they are in a bar or nightclub where they are more guarded due to being hit on incessantly.Social Superstar an athlete. For some reason a lot of guys make a joke or tell a story that works brilliantly in a conversation. so you’ll experience less rejection and more responsiveness than you would in a nightspot.

First. A friend of mine. Avoid it at all costs. Then you need to focus on using your body language to convey the alpha male impression you want to convey. muscular physique. The conversation started out well 298 . Then you’ll want to get used to observing and interpreting body language. you’ll see your bar or nightclub game improve dramatically. Don’t apologize. I’m going to focus on how to build comfort with a woman once you’re already in conversation with her. Stick to your guns. But outside of that exception. There are plenty of other articles out there about that. weakling you are. avoid self-deprecation or anything that lowers your status. if you step on her foot or spill a drink on her. Don’t use self-deprecating humor.COM it’s not the end of the world. It works great because (a) it’s genuinely funny when done right and (b) it points out one of your strengths yet comes off less obnoxious and approval-seeking than outright bragging. Make her laugh. don’t apologize for who you are and don’t be afraid to offend. Apologizing for who you are and what you believe however is a no-no. Beethoven. you can joke about what a 95 lb. recently approached two women at a bar. I’m not going to focus on openers and how to start conversations with women. They are so afraid of not getting her approval that they almost beg for it. the anxiety kicks in and they start getting flustered easily.The Best of TSBMAG. A woman busts their balls a little bit and they backtrack or apologize immediately. never sound desperate to please. but never at your own expense. then you should apologize. Second. Be cocky. I’ll give an example of this. There is one exception to the self-deprecating humor rule: you can use selfdeprecating humor if it’s blatantly insincere and actually points out one of your strengths: for example. if you have an athletic. Nightlife Comfort Since this article is supposed to be about building comfort. Apologizing for your actions is the right thing to do under some circumstances. Once you get used to doing your daily daytime drills and getting comfortable starting and maintaining conversations with women. When many guys come across a pretty woman. Then they start over apologizing. be playful. And that alone is important. Of course use your discretion. Don’t do it. and tease her like she’s your little sister. because both those tendencies are obstacles to building comfort.

If she’s heavily into church.” His target’s jaw dropped and she was absolutely mortified. don’t mock her chosen field as frivolous or stupid. If you just keep negging and teasing at the same level you were when you first started building comfort with her. Women do not respect a man they can easily dominate or make uncomfortable. For some reason. often does more harm than good Fourth. but at some point one of the girls asked Beethoven what he and his friends were discussing earlier. Third. changing locations gives the psychological 299 . But Beethoven stuck to his guns. He just looked her up and down and said “Whatever. you risk coming off as a real obnoxious prick. Not only did he turn that potential negative into a positive. instead of making the situation better. why does it bother you? It’s not like you have anything to worry about looking the way you do” and just kept going with the conversation. and even worse. chosen careers and religious beliefs. Sometimes when guys get really good at the negging and teasing and see the initial results it gets them. which would have made her uncomfortable. but you do want to dial it down as you build more and more rapport with the girl. put her in a position of dominance. which would make her lose respect for him. And you never. he ended up hooking up with her. and if they do not respect you. Beethoven responded “We were just discussing how many fat girls there are here tonight. move around from place to place. And then it goes from being cute and charming to just smug. know when to stop negging and teasing so much. as these tend to represent a person’s core values and insulting these.Social Superstar enough. By never sounding desperate to please and never apologizing for who you are. didn’t backtrack and didn’t apologize. Once you start winning a woman over and she is warming up to you. You should keep playful tone and never stop teasing totally. She said “That’s not very nice” and seemed disgusted. it would have just highlighted the awkwardness. Good rule of thumb is to be careful about negging about political stances. If he apologized. they will feel uncomfortable around you. they go overboard and do it for too long. If she’s passionate about politics and is involved in certain causes. she is going to want to start getting to know you and building rapport with you. don’t tease or playfully insult her favorite cause or ideology. ever want to tease a girl about a topic related to her core values. even playfully. you earn their respect and set the foundation for building more comfort. If she is passionate about fashion and works in the field. even if it’s within the bar or club. annoying and dickish. don’t mock religion.

It’s an illusion. Then go to another part of the bar. But there’s also the risk that she may end up talking about him at length and getting nostalgic about him and talking about how much she still loves him. As with anything. 10 minutes later take her to some couches to sit down. I’m not going to go into the specifics of playful touching here. do not dwell too deeply into conversation about ex's (hers or yours) and specific approaches toward sex. For example. A conversation will get stale quickly and turn into the foundation for a friend zone relationship if you never touch her during the conversation. playful touching conveys sexual interest and builds attraction and sexual tension. she may have a lot of unresolved anger toward him. if within a bar.COM impression that you are spending more time together and bonding more. In the pickup community they call it “Kino. may start venting and getting worked up and then start transferring her issues with her ex 300 .” but it’s something my friend and I always made sure to do before we ever knew what it was called. such as going from one bar to a second bar to lounge to a diner…bouncing around like that gives the psychological impression to a girl that she’s just spent three or four mini-dates with you and she’ll feel more comfort with you than if you spent that exact same amount of time talking to her rooted to one spot. With ex-es. harmless conversation. The more locations a woman associates with you. and suddenly the attraction mood is dead and you’re on the road to becoming her emotional tampon as she drones on and on about how much feelings she has for him. Or on the flip side. don’t overdo it. but you can find tons of Kino-related articles by Bobby and Mike right here on the TSB Magazine I’m sure. which are very important when building comfort. take her to the dance floor later. you’ve just guaranteed yourself a place in the friend zone. Sixth. If you know how to dance. the more time she feels like she’s spent with you and the more comfortable she feels. Light. but it works. it can end up being a light. really. lead her to a spot at the bar and order drinks. Fifth. These things can backfire too easily if you don’t know what you’re doing. If you build comfort without building attraction at the same time. while it’s cool to playfully bring up sex.The Best of TSBMAG. Moving around from venue to venue also helps build comfort. make sure to touch her whenever you can. Take her to another end of the bar and introduce her to some your friends. You don’t want to come off as hyperactive and spastic and moving around every 30 seconds. but it’s not that hard. Getting the balance of touching just right so that you don’t come off either too timid or too aggressive takes some trial and error.

to change their minds you must change their logic. she’s going to feel obligated to stick to her original conservative statement for fear of looking like a hypocrite or liar. why guys fear commitment. Needless to say. Hope it helps some of you out there.Social Superstar specifically and men in general toward the next closest male target. who in this case would be you. And regarding bringing up specific approaches toward sex. I made this mistake with a woman once. As I mentioned before. With women. And on her end. Meanwhile. By asking her such a specific sexual questions too early before she’s built comfort and rapport with you. 301 . thinking that making her talk about her shitty ex would be a great way to sell myself as a positive alternative. to change their minds you must change their emotions. here’s an example of how that can backfire. it’s going to mentally psyche you out and make you behave less aggressively in your comfort building. even if she gets insanely attracted and comfortable with you later in that same conversation. and I have to get to know him very well first. if you never asked about sex at all things could have happened much more spontaneously. you’ll get a totally different answer than you would if you asked her that same question later on when you have her on an emotional high. it wasn’t a great comfort-building conversation. this isn’t an exhaustive list when it comes to building comfort. Instead I spent the night fielding angry questions about why guys cheat. but I think it’s a pretty good foundation. If a woman hasn’t built much attraction and comfort with you yet and you ask her what her attitude is about how soon is too soon to have sex. women’s attitudes change wildly with their emotional states. Unlike men.” Now that you’ve made her explicitly give a sexual timetable. why guys hurt women…I ended up being her convenient target for everything she hated about men. With men. she’ll be very cognizant about coming off like a slut to a guy she barely knows and may say something like “I don’t have sex with a guy until three or four months of dating. You’ll start believing you have no shot of building much comfort anytime soon. now that she’s verbally committed to that.

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Day 10 Being Funnier – Make it fun!
Written by Barry Kirkey Originally Published: 06/24/2008

Every woman likes a positive man, and often, positivity takes the form of a good sense of humor. The problem with giving anyone advice about how to become funnier, is that humor is universally subjective. Meaning, every culture, sub-culture or individual decides what is funny on their own. Yeah there are exceptions, people can be told by popular media what they think is funny, but you’re not one of those people because you’re reading this article. Here are some things you can do to become funnier, in chronological order: First, find out what you like. A sense of humor is as unique as your own DNA (simile). They are usually a complex combination of joke types, body language, interest in shows/movies, and so forth. This step should normally be a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised at how so many people dislike comedy. Once you find out what you like, expose yourself to it. Watch those shows and movies that you love. Watch them alone or with friends and family. Learn how to laugh out loud when you watch them, even if you’re by yourself. I would caution you, however, not to “force it down,” meaning if you’re not in the mood to watch a comedy show (sitcoms, late night, etc.) then don’t watch it. If you have the problem of never being in the mood then you need to find out why this is the case. Note: If you’re never in the mood to laugh, you may have other issues that are keeping you down. I suggest you speak to a psychologist, doctor or other professional that can determine why your mood is always down. You might be surprised to learn about what prevents you from doing what you love. This can be something as serious as depression or anxiety. However, it can also mean that you’re still, subconsciously, dealing with unresolved matters in your life (such as, a fight with your dad 6 months ago and you haven’t talked to him since). After enough exposure, you’re ready to take it to the field. Try to avoid copying other jokes directly – those Borat impressions are no longer

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funny, so don’t do them. Unless you’re a naturally funny guy – then you can get away with it, but that’s a whole different article. If you must copy, use a variation of what you’ve learned instead. For example, if you want to do a Seinfeld joke, don’t just start quoting the show. Do your worst and most annoying Seinfeld voice and exaggerate a Seinfeld-type joke as much as you can. Make it ridiculous and unexpected. While all this is going, laugh at your own jokes. Laugh as much as you can and absorb the criticism of others by laughing even more. Here’s why: Laughing is infectious. The more you laugh, the more others around you are likely to laugh as well. Not only that, but let’s consider the whole theory of conditioning by association. If you’re consistently around the same people, doing jokes often, and laughing often, people will associate you with laughter. When this happens, you’ve won the game – you’re known as “the funny guy.” “But Mr. fuckface (me)! How do I use this to get girls!?” Just by statistics, most people end up in quality relationships through other people that you already know (i.e., in the office, friend of a friend or family member). So you get the immediate benefit of being “the funny” guy in your own social circle that way. “But Mr. faggittface (me)! What about girls you don’t know?!” Okay, that’s definitely more difficult, but not impossible. With cold approaches, first impressions are the only thing you have, so make it count. Start off with the best jokes you have, make sure you laugh and you smile. If she looks down on you, make a friendly insult, “wow – someone dropped their funny basket in the toilet today!” and walk on to the next person. If you end up forced into a situation with someone who doesn’t respect your humor then this is particularly challenging, because you can potentially make an enemy without knowing it. Similar to what happened with Darth Vador, it’s difficult to turn someone from being your enemy to your friend, but not impossible. I won’t go into this situation now, because that is a discussion for those who are already polished and comfortable with their own sense of humor… Dun dun dun! Anal.

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Day 11 Mastering the Art of Push-Pull and Cocky-Funny
Written by The Asian Rake Originally Published: 06/25/2008

Do You Want Faster and More Powerful Seductions? How the 80/20 Principle applies to Push-Pull and Cocky-Funny? We’ve all heard about the 80/20 principle first developed by Vilfredo Pareto in the context of the distribution of income and wealth. My experience and observations have shown that the 80/20 rule applies just as well to push-pull and cocky-funny. After closely observing naturals who are masters at crazily rapid escalations and seductions, and after a lot of discussions with PUAs who have really tight game, I’ve discovered an important enhancement to the simplistic push-pull and cocky-funny concepts. This small bit of finetuning can shave a lot of time off your seductions and create much stronger, closer emotional connections. Here’s my thesis statement (yes, I’m an academic, lol): If you want to seduce a woman faster and have her more powerfully attracted to you, the optimal mix for a man who already has his fundamentals down (his body language, tonality, and basic inner game) and is interacting with a confident and attractive woman is 80% pull, 20% push. I’m not going to be too strict about the numbers. But more accurately, the optimal combination depends on how good the man’s fundamentals are and how confident the woman is. It’s a continuum with the upper end of the continuum being 80-20 pull-push. My experience has also been that pull-push is best mixed with humor. Plus, the pull and the push are opposite manifestations of cockiness. With push, you are cocky enough to think that you are too good for the girl, so you push her away. With pull, you are cocky enough to think that you are irresistible to her and to women in general, and you want her, so you pull her in. Although there is plenty to say about this combination of push-pull and cocky-funny, I’ll leave that to another article. My focus here is on the

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80/20 principle applied to the push-pull dynamic. I’ll assume here that it’s obvious that push-pull is closely connected to cocky-funny. For the classic book on push-pull, see Swingcat’s ebook, Real World Seduction. For cocky-funny, the best authority is David DeAngelo. Check out his ebook, Double Your Dating, and his DVD series, Cocky Comedy. I assume at least familiarity with push-pull and cocky-funny as described in these resources. Christian Hudson and Nick Sparks over at The Social Man are about to release a product that incorporates all the concepts in Swingcat and David D.’s books and then takes it all to another level. Watch at their site for the release. We’re good friends, so I’m a little biased, but you can go over there and check it out for yourself: What I say here is NOT for absolute newbie's, who don’t yet have their fundamentals down (body language, tonality, and basic inner game). If you still don’t know what good BL&T looks, sounds, and feels like, stop reading this and figure that out first. My point here applies to elite game. It’s for guys who want to know what it’s like to live in the top 10%, or higher, of men in this world. That’s not to say this is advanced. It’s just not for beginners. A quickie definition of push-pull straight from the pen of Swingcat: “Push-Pull is whenever you emotionally push a woman away from you and, then, emotionally pull her back in. Each Push creates an emotional space for each Pull.” We’ll be filling this out as we go along. Now let’s unpack the thesis statement. While you can succeed using almost any combination of push and pull (e.g., 80% push-20% pull, 50% push-50% pull), the combination that will generate the fastest seductions and most powerful connections is 80-20 pull-push or in other words, 80% pull-20% push. This is true only if the following also hold: a. The man has good fundamentals (good body language, tonality, tight inner game and is hence non-needy, etc.). This also applies if he is physically attractive or is perceived by the woman to have high social value. b. The woman is unusually attractive in the man’s eyes, and she is confident about her value and attractiveness. This relates to Believability. She needs to be able to be confident enough in her self-worth to accept your advances.

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If both those elements are in place, then the fastest and most powerful route to sex is a mix of 80% pull-20% push. [CAVEAT: If the man only has average fundamentals and the woman is only of average confidence in her own attractiveness and value, then the optimal mix is further down the continuum and closer to 50-50 pushpull. This is because pulling a woman closer to you emotionally is only effective when you already have a basic level of attraction from the woman. Of course, we all know that this kind of attraction is largely independent of one’s physical appearance. Over 90% of this kind of attraction is attributable to body language and tonality alone. That’s why I call these the fundamentals. Your attitude and outlook are also crucial to pulling off the right BL&T, so I include inner game as a factor for the sake of completeness.] Pushing a woman away is effective when a woman looks at you and doesn’t expect you to be cocky. It throws her off and is hence funny. It’s like when a precocious child talks like an adult, using mature and sophisticated vocabulary, sentence structure, etc. It’s unexpected and incongruent with the kid’s image, and hence, kind of funny, and if done right, it’s admirable. Now imagine a 50 year old, sophisticated-looking man talking the same way. It’s not funny anymore. It’s just normal and expected. Similarly, when a below average looking guy uses a lot of push cockyfunny, talking as if he’s too good for her and using humorous sarcasm, it’s attractive because the woman begins to wonder, “How can this guy be so cocky? He must have something going for him that I can’t see yet. I’m interested.” And because it’s done in a comedic way, she’s not offended, but rather, intrigued. Now if a guy who has his fundamentals down (good BL&T), a goodlooking guy, or a guy perceived to have high value starts to push her away emotionally, she’s not intrigued. Why? Because it’s obvious why this guy is so cocky. He’s good-looking, high-value, or has an attractive personality. It’s not funny anymore because it’s expected and congruent with his image. He just comes across cocky. For a guy like this to use cocky-funny, he has to really emphasize the humor and really cut down on the cocky part.

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Most people overlook the fact that David D. himself acknowledged this in one of his newsletters: "If you’re a pretty good looking guy, you might turn down the cocky, and turn up the funny. Women perceive good-looking guys who act cocky as MAJOR PLAYERS, and too much cocky too soon can backfire on you.” More accurately, this isn’t just true for guys who are good-looking. If your fundamentals are strong, or you’re perceived as high-value, then it applies just as well to you. It’s the push dynamic that makes these high-value or good-looking guys come across as too unattainable. For guys like this, it’s best to use the pull dynamic more often and save the push dynamic for that 20% of dramatic contrast. And obviously, when a guy with good fundamentals, attractive appearance, or high social value is perceived as a “major player,” it is very bad for his Believability. You can do it the opposite way, of course. You can do mainly push and just a little pull, like 80% push and 20% pull. Or you can be very cocky and only a little funny. Sure, you can get success that way, too. But for the most part, if your fundamentals are already strong, then: 1) You can get much faster seductions by pulling her in more often than you can by pushing her away. 2) You can get the girl to feel a deeper emotional bond with you by pulling more often than pushing. Here’s why: 1. If your fundamentals are good, then you will be a relatively DOMINANT, powerful, and confident man. Hence, girls (and most people in general) will naturally feel like following your lead. So when you tell a girl to sit down, she will feel a strong social and emotional pull to sit down. When you’re emotionally pulling a girl in by telling her to kiss you, she will have to work extra hard to resist. Most girls like a strong, dominant, powerful, confident guy, and many girls have the fantasy of “being taken” by such a man. Any resistance they give to such a man is just token.


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Thus, if you already have good fundamentals (BL&T and basic inner game), and you want to shave massive amounts of time off your seductions, you’re better off pulling the girl in more frequently than pushing her away because the chances are good she will give in more often than not. Ah, but Asian Rake, when you push a girl away, doesn’t she want to pull you in? Isn’t that the whole point of pushing her away? So you can get her to chase you? Yes, to a certain extent, this is true. That’s why you SHOULD STILL PUSH. That’s the all-important 20%. In fact, by pulling most of the time, when you do finally push her away, it’ll feel that much more powerful to her. If you’re a dominant guy, girls will feel pressure to follow your orders, and unless she’s very dominant herself, chances are good that she will NOT pull you in return every time you push her away. Chances are good that if you are a dominant man, when you push her further away, she will follow your lead and remain further away. Assuming the pushes and pulls are of about equal emotional intensity (that’s one variable I’m leaving out here), if you PULL more often than not, she might resist you at first, but then because you’re dominant, she’ll follow your lead and move closer to you emotionally and physically. If you PUSH more often than not, she might resist you at first, but then because you’re a dominant guy, she’ll follow your lead and move further away from you emotionally and physically. Sure you can generate attraction with most combinations of push-pull. But what’s faster to sex? When she’s emotionally and physically closer to you, or when she’s emotionally and physically farther from you? It should be obvious. This is how the best naturals I’ve seen get bathroom lays in less than 15 minutes. It’s pull-pull-pull-pull-PUSH-pull-pull-pull-PUSH-pull-pull-pull to the bathroom. 2. By pulling more often than pushing, you can also create the deep emotional connections much faster.

A far more efficient way to develop emotional connections is to pull her in emotionally. 309 . Pull Cocky-Funny? Once again. truly. If your Believability game is good then every qualification is actually a pull. I know that she loves a guy that is so sarcastic that it makes her nervous. and generally bust her balls as much as possible. I like that. One very effective kind of pull technique is in conjunction with screening and qualifying. this is also a key technique for creating the kind of emotional connections that will get girls to fall in love with you FAST. She’ll be saying to herself.” And of course. however. Now let’s add the COCKY-FUNNY into the mix. is a great example of a pull. “Wow. PUSH COCKY-FUNNY The prime proponent of this is David D. For instance. probably the best way to illustrate what I mean is through examples. “Wow. but this is one of the easiest to do. like sharing secrets and using childhood regression. helpfully lays it all out in his Double Your Dating: I’m going to play hard to get. she’ll want to open herself up and continue connecting with you. so I’m going to really keep the heat on… and when she starts to show any interest at all on the outside. how can she possibly feel an emotional connection? This should be obvious. Btw.Social Superstar If you’re continually pushing her away emotionally. make fun of her. What exactly do I mean by Push Cocky-Funny vs.” said in response to her little adventure story. of course. this guy really. Let’s first talk about the internal mindset behind Push Cocky-Funny. When you stack enough of these. David D. be indifferent towards her. There are others. I’m going to blow her off and make her prove to me that she wants me… so I can reject her again. sincerely likes me for my special qualities. she’ll feel like you really appreciate her for her unique qualities. you are really adventurous.

(Pull #2) HB (breaking out laughing): Where are you from? Me: From? It doesn’t matter. and I jump in front of her with my hands slightly extended in front of my chest in a “stopping” motion with my palms out. I learned from a natural friend that this sort of thing is best done when you’re a bit over the top or dramatically exaggerated in what you say and in your facial expressions. which is just about the only place in the club where you can talk without speaking right into her ear. First tell me where you’re from. but you’re better off reading his eBook or watching his DVD series Cocky Comedy. so I’ll give you one of my own examples. just look at you. which is what I call. I want your number. like if I’m standing next to a girl at a bar. you’ll be pushing her away a lot more than you’ll be pulling her in. 310 . I’ll turn to her and say in a completely serious voice.” PULL COCKY-FUNNY This is my default style of cocky-funny. LOL. Or say. “Push Cocky-Funny. I could go on forever. (Pull #1) HB (shocked): Huh? Are you crazy? Why? Me (with an incredulous look on my face): Why? I mean.COM You notice that with this mindset. I say after lowering my hands) I’m in love with you… Give me your number. This took place near the coat check of a huge nightclub. as if he needs to sell any more. Wow.” they’re thinking this kind of cocky-funny. with a sigh and a love-sick puppy dog look.The Best of TSBMAG. and body language. tonality. I never thought I’d be plugging David D. follows this up with some now classic examples: I do crazy things. (Pull #3) HB (laughing): No way.’s materials. long-haired beauty walks by. You’re driving me crazy. David D. Me: OMG! (Then. “What are you doing at a bar for god sakes? Can’t you find a nice normal guy? Or are you desperate?” All with a completely straight face. “Will you PLEASE stop touching me?” And then look them right in the eye. It should be a crime for you to walk in public. A super cute. When most guys think “cocky-funny.

That was 5 pulls to 1 push. If you haven’t read any of his materials yet. Here. This sort of Pull Cocky-Funny can get you super fast make outs and. Zan is probably the best representative of this kind of cockyfunny. and then I let her go back to her friends. Me (throwing off her hand and looking shocked): Are you calling me a liar? I’ve just confessed my deep dark love for you. We talked a little bit more. “enlightened seduction. check the mASF archives or google. For an example of a fast make out. … guess. The one push came after 4 pulls. HB: Um. (Then. asking what I was doing tomorrow… But that’s for another LR. I take her hand in mine).Social Superstar Me: Okay. In fact. HB (laughs): Okay. you’re making me really nervous. I don’t even think that push was necessary. some of which you can find elsewhere on my site and some of which I might write about in the future. (Pull #4) HB (laughing): You’re not nervous. There are many other tales to recount about naturals such as him. Another great example comes from Zan. Notice the push-pull ratio here. wait. (Push #1) HB laughed. give me your number. You can have the dog. My hands are all cold and sweaty. and now you’re calling me a liar? That’s it. We’re getting a divorce… But I’m keeping the DVDs. I’ll be so sad… I’m going to go home and cry now (and then I slumped my shoulders as if completely sad and depressed). Me (stepping out in front of her again and knowing that she’s just teasing and wants me to chase her): No.) You know. see the LR that features my first encounter with NaturalMD:. Among the community oldtimers. club bathroom sex. and she texted back. You’ll have to check back for those. China? Me: Pretty close… (Taking a step closer to her so that we’re inches apart. feel.” 311 . You can’t go. I texted her about an hour later. HB said (with a smile): “Okay. as my natural friends have shown. Me (perking up and letting out a sly smile): Okay. bye.” and started walking off. I say in a quieter tone. I said nothing and continued looking fake-mad. (Pull #5) HB laughed.

I understand… let’s make it 8 then. Did you miss me? HER: Hardly. And keep it all funny.COM There are so many possibilities to choose from. Pull Cocky-Funny. would it? HER (laughing) No. ZAN: I want to see you. I have two bottles of champagne at home. ZAN: (smile. I suppose not… I find this whole exchange completely charming and hilarious. and you are interacting with a confident and attractive woman. But if you have good fundamentals (body language. I never. her boyfriend objections (or whatever) mean nothing to me. wink) Really? That’s very interesting. Zan pulls her in about seven times. I will pick you up at 7. ZAN: Oh. or you have high perceived social value. do you? ZAN: Of course not! Wouldn’t be the same if I did. This is the ideal kind of frame to be operating from when doing Pull Cocky-Funny. I immediately go up to her. 312 . As if she had never resisted me in the first place. Push Cocky-Funny vs. Just about everything he says is a pull. So there you have it. smile and wink. then you can get faster seductions and make deeper connections by doing more Pull than Push. So her objections don’t even register with him. HER: I can’t.The Best of TSBMAG. ZAN: Oh hey. or you’re good-looking. tonality. He’s cocky because he believes that she’d be crazy to turn him down. In other words. HER: No! I told you last time I have a boyfriend. HER: No thanks. If she says she is not interested and leaves. ever worry about a woman’s resistance to me. Tell me your number and I’ll remember it. no problem. Both can work. ZAN: One to drink and one to pour all over your body… HER: You never give up. and basic inner game). so you’re still seeing Norman? HER: Uh… his name’s not Norman. ZAN: (big smile) Hello. and pick up right where I left off. around 80%-20% is ideal. My boyfriend wouldn’t like it. But if I ever see her again. but this conversation of his has stuck in my mind for a while now: ZAN: Come out with me for a drink tonight. sweetie.

Hopefully by being consciously aware of these mistakes you can catch yourself in the act. They are afraid that if they catch eye contact with someone they will be forced to talk or smile or do something else beyond their comfort zone. When people feel insecure or nervous they start to have trouble sitting still. 313 . and quickly correct them. People try to blend in with the crowd by slumping their shoulders. Slouching Over. others will juggle the loose change in their pocket. Fiddling with Things. it took watching myself on video a few times to really appreciate how many mistakes I was actually making. By taking the time to first break any of these bad habits you may have. Slouching over is a way of keeping a low profile. They do this because it is a way of avoiding making a connection with someone. For me. Subconsciously people slouch because they are timid and don’t want attention on them.Social Superstar Day 12 Body Language 101 Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published:06/26/2008 The first thing you need to accept about your body language is that right now you’re probably completely unaware of the mistakes that you are making. bowing their heads. Some people will rub their chin or neck. but you’re missing out on opportunities to connect with other human beings. Less confident people tend to look down a lot. By avoiding eye contact with people not only are you giving off a low status vibe. Their insecurity eats away at them and they feel forced to constantly be moving their hands. 3. The first part of this lesson I want to make you aware of the different ways you are conveying low status. Doing any of these things immediately screams that you are not comfortable in your present situation. other people with run their hand through their hair. 2. Avoiding Eye Contact. you will be making it possible to accept the new habits I will talk about later. It portrays an image that you are socially awkward and unable to properly socialize. and taking up as little space as possible. Body Language mistakes 1. Touching Your Face.

Body Language Habits of the Alpha Male This second part of this lesson is designed to improve your body language and replace the negative habits you may have been displaying. If someone else is talking to you. When we tend to get nervous we tense up in the jaw. This displays the image that you’re too bored or tired to bother holding up your head straight. Leaning Forward to Talk to Someone.COM 4. Habit 7: Take up space when you sit. It displays a lack of enthusiasm and energy towards life. Habit 3: Keep your muscles relaxed. causing her to move toward him. Spread yourself out a bit. hold eye contact about 50% of the time. Create a little game with yourself to remind yourself to pay attention to your posture. This is especially true of your facial muscles. 314 . It can also give off the impression that you’re uncomfortable with the way you look and are trying to hide your face. and which guys will fail. 5. In the beginning you will need to constantly be checking yourself. Tell your friends to point this out to you. Habit 5: Push your chest out a bit and pull your shoulders back. Habit 4: Smile often. If you think she can’t hear you… talk louder.The Best of TSBMAG. The unsuccessful guys are the ones bent over leaning forward... If you don’t have a naturally attractive smile than you should practice in front of a mirror. The idea is to take up some space. A smile displays a positive energy that is infectious. While doing the talking you should be holding eye contact for the majority of the time. Holding Your Face up with Your Hand. Habit 6: You should keep your feet about as far apart as your shoulders. as they appear to have nothing to offer. Habit 2: Get in the habit of walking around with your head up and your neck straight. If you’re talking to a group of people switch eye contact up between the different members of the group… but always be holding it with someone. Habit 1: Make it a practice to hold eye contact with everyone that you meet. You need to keep your face free of this stress. These are not the kind of people other people want to interact with. A quick glance around a room can tell you which guys are going to succeed with the women they are talking to. This is another habit you will have to check often to avoid falling back into the old habit of slouching. Don’t slouch and look sloppy. The successful guys are usually relaxed leaning away from the girl. but don’t be afraid to get comfortable.

relax. learn how to speak slower… and how to articulate every word better. The trick to pulling all these habits together is to use slow calculated gestures. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. This kind of body language transmits the message: “I’m so comfortable in my own skin. When talking to someone avoid clutching on to your beer or putting your hands in your pocket.” Try learning how to turn your head slowly. and take big slow steps. all the same rules apply to it.Social Superstar Habit 8: Walk with confidence and power. and feel like they need to talk because they’re nervous. Also walk with direction. Most people speak with weak. But if you implement these habits over rest of these 31 days you will find that eventually it will become natural to you. It takes time and determination to break a bad habit and replace it with a new one. do it slowly like it doesn’t embarrass you that she noticed. Learn to speak from down in your chest and stomach. If you want to attract beautiful women. Habit 9: Avoid making sudden hyper gestures. If you’re grabbing a drink off the bar take it at a speed that says “I’m in no hurry. Don’t do it! Learn to lean back. You want to give off the vibe that you know where it is and already are heading there. Every gesture you make should flow naturally at the same speed as your previous gestures. 315 . squeaky voices that convey the message: “I’m not confident… I have no self esteem”. how to blink slowly. neck up. Also. If you’re giving a girl a once over. This means your head should be high. Try never to appear to be in a hurry or flustered. Habit 10: Use hand gestures when telling a story. Body language and voice tone habits are not easy to change. Learn how to speak with a deeper voice. shoulders back. Most guys talk too much. and become comfortable with the tension that comes from silence. Become comfortable pausing… it creates anticipation. While technically it isn’t body language. too fast. This is especially true when walking through a bar… you never want to give off the vibe that you’re looking for the cool place to be. chest puffed out a bit. it hurts”. you’re going to need to take a few lessons from Barry White. On the subject of body language… voice tone is insanely important. Add more bass to your voice.

then all the techniques you’re learning will work TEN times better.The Best of TSBMAG.COM If you work on using your BODY AND VOICE to communicate that you’re a confident. sexually aware alpha male. 316 .

com 317 Or search for “Building Your Social Circle” on TSBMAG.Social Superstar Day 13 Building your Social Circle http://www.

I don’t view it as a way to “pull” a woman down to your level. (Note: I DO NOT do this for a living.COM Day 14 How to Properly Tease a Woman Written by Brad Howard Originally Published: 06/30/2008 Before I start. no matter how good looking she is I find that if you’re pulling YOURSELF down to HER level… you’ll find better success. the whole point of teasing is to create a fun environment where women can loosen up and open up to you. So… with that aside… let's get to it… let's talk a little about my way of teasing women… and how it sparks sexual tension. let me just say that this article is NOT going to be some PROFOUND. or get them to see that whatever’s going on it their life really isn’t that bad at all. They are: The Opinion Opener Teasing Your Look (clothes. In fact. Teasing is also a great way to shake someone out of a funk. complicated. piece of work that I’m trying to make sound more insightful than it probably is… It seems that everyone is doing that nowadays and I think that the message that people are trying to convey is getting lost in the fray. here are the MOST important “things” that if you get down that will make the most impact in your dating/relationship life… bar none. Here’s what I mean: 318 .The Best of TSBMAG. and the interactions I’ve have with guys that aren’t having any problems in the “woman” department. That being said.) First and foremost. This is just a collection of what I KNOW to be true from my personal life. I’m not out at bars testing out my latest and greatest “teasing” method… nor do I really expect YOU to be. hair) Your Body (best inner game changer… EVER!) If you can get these 4 aspects of your “game” down… you’ll CRUSH most men.

If you’re playful. She feels uncomfortable now… and the conversation takes a negative tone. that I DON’T condone. 319 . “Ah ha! I KNEW you were some type of shoe guru. It’s meant to be fun. but I don’t usually use it. For instance. many times. A woman’s ego is like a glass house and teasing in this way COULD be like throwing a ROCK into it. you might hear someone tell you to say. Here’s the thing about teasing though. and ask a woman “I need your opinion on something… and be BRUTAL… what do you think of these shoes. I’ll throw out some self-depreciating humor as BAIT to get the ball rolling. Don’t use teasing to “knock” a woman down. To which you could say something like. Teasing works BEST with women that you already know… or that you’ve just met through a circle of friends (especially if you have a bit of notoriety amongst the group for being a fun guy). I just picked ‘em up and I always seem to screw this up… ha-ha”. she’s likely to be playful back. So. “You know. “Setting up TEASE BAIT” Teasing is no fun if only one person is doing it. The WHOLE POINT of teasing is to make the woman FEEL GOOD by being around you. Where did you get your special talent (smile)?” And that’s just for opening someone up. everything is working for you tonight EXCEPT those shoes… where did you get those?” Is there a way to say this so that it works? Absolutely.Social Superstar I like to use self depreciating humor to set up teasing. if you come from a place of strength. It might work for some. Would I RECOMMEND that you try it if you’re a rookie at the whole “teasing” game? Um… HELL NO! And here’s why. For instance.

So you say: “Yeah. Again. Nelly… I know you’re just trying to get me drunk so you can take me home and do dirty things to me. I get it… Look. POWERFUL STUFF here. wink) This also works well if you want to take it to a sexual level.COM (The KEY to self-depreciating humor is that although you’re a strong. yeah. what you’re up to…You may continue… (smile. On closer look. (smile) Her: “Whatever. if you wanna ask me out. Her: “(maybe changing subject)” You: (laughing) “You can change the subject if you want. Let’s say that you want to ask a person out on a date (bland. if you get on one knee and smile really pretty… I MIGHT even say yes…” Her: “I AM NOT!” You: “It’s okay. but just remember that I KNOW (point to head). You: “Whoa. but they are just too scared to tell anyone about them. Who knows. just say so. This works REALLY well.The Best of TSBMAG. really… it won’t make you a lesser person (smile). “The Accusation Tease” This one is FUN. yeah I know… ha-ha). confident guy… you don’t take yourself so seriously) So maybe I’ll tell a fun story that people can laugh at (like the time I locked myself out of my hotel room NAKED and had to walk down to the desk NAKED to get another key) and then ACCUSE people of having similar stories. the reason this works is because people (women) can see how SECURE you are with yourself because MOST men would NEVER tell a story in which THEY were the one being made fun of. I use this ALL the time. You don’t have to keep beating around the bush. I am not” 320 . Basically. all you’re doing is ACCUSING the other person of trying to do something that YOU want to happen.

feeling me up already and we just got here… geez…” “The Frame-Banging Tease” Okay. why is it that every woman thinks that she can buy you a drink and then try to get in your pants. Say your woman. we can go on and on with this but I hope you get my drift. would that mean you wouldn’t hang out any more? I TOTALLY expected more out of you.” (You’re doing this to show her that it’s CRAZINESS for her to feel like she’s feeling… naturally. Like a little bit. keep in mind that these ARE NOT serious conversations. you’re a guy and that’s what guys want. They are tongue in check and playful. I never expected YOU to let (someone/something) get under your skin like this. this is what happened)” You: (Smiling) “Wow. To which you can reply: “Dang. well. What would you do if I lost my hair all of the sudden. Here’s what you do: Her: “Man. I couldn’t think of a better term for this but here’s the gist of it. or even a woman that you just met has had a really rotten day… but you want some sex… because. Here’s a hint. we now have to employ our most SECRET WEAPON… “The Tickle Tease” NOTHING changes the tone of a conversation faster than some “good ole” tickling.) If she doesn’t snap out of her funk with this. Missy… (whisper) it’s gonna take more than one (smile) Guys. Start slow at first.Social Superstar You: “Man. blah. I’ve had such a shitty day… (blah. You: (Smiling) “Are you going to get in a better mood… huh… are you? Her: “Stop it!” 321 . Using the accusation tease is a SURE way to get her to give you a “love tap”… or punch on the arm… or a light shove.

Wow. I also like walking up behind my woman and “shanking” her if she has on sweats or loose shorts in the house… and then ACT like I’m going to do it when we’re out in public. I can’t help the fact that almost everyone else in life is lame. you bonk her nose with your finger. make sure that it’s fun for HER… but that you are ALSO AMUSING YOURSELF at the SAME TIME. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had people ask me: “You just trip yourself out don’t you?” Me: “Absolutely.COM You: (tickling) “Are you in a better mood yet? Tell me I’m the greatest ever… who’s your buddy… who’s your pal… (okay. I can’t believe I just said BLAMMO… ha-ha (The above statement is a great example of self depreciating humor. Teasing is a fun way to build attraction and BOOKS have been written on the subject. That’s fun too. I like to think of it as “playing with myself” without all the mess. bring back the old school “You’ve Got Something On Your Shirt” gag… where you point at a spot on her shirt and when she looks down. Or… and this is always fun. If you’re walking side by side and there is a physical object on her side… slowly start walking her into it. For example. It’s the ULTIMATE way of flirting and getting her to chase you.The Best of TSBMAG. because I could literally go on forever on this topic… physical humor and teasing ROCKS. by the way) “Physical Teasing” Before I end this. Fun Stuff. Here’s my final tip on teasing… and pay attention because this is important. When you are teasing a woman. That always works great. 322 . all while showing your strength as a man. so I stole that from “Stripes”… shoot me) Then you just start kissing and BLAMMO! Bumming Monkeys Time.

(smiling. I’m done. with a touch of self depreciation as well) That’s it.Social Superstar You should try it sometime instead of living in “lame-o land”. laughing… Note: Having fun. 323 .

Just as you would go to the mall. It’s not just for young people either.000 new users a day. In many respects the idea of meeting people online is still fairly new. Obviously these sites are overflowing with women in their early 20’s and 30’s. bookstores and coffee shops are on social networking sites. And guess what???…half of those are women! WHAT TYPES OF GIRLS ARE ON THESE SITES? Social networking sites are different than traditional dating sites. but there are also 324 . In fact. the coffee shop or a club to hang out and meet new people. a bar. at any given point in time there are more women online than there are in every bar in your city combined. The fact of the matter is the same women you meet out at bars.COM Day 15 How to Create a Kick Ass MySpace and Facebook Profile Written by Race de Priest Originally Published: 07/01/2008 WHY ONLINE GAME ROCKS AND HOW YOU CAN GET STARTED RIGHT NOW Now that the internet is such a big part of our lives. but thanks to the emergence and popularity of social networking sites like MySpace and Facebook this is all changing. The girl next door. And because it is continually becoming more and more socially acceptable these same girls are open to meeting up with guys they met online.The Best of TSBMAG. You should really view them as an online hang out. So how are you supposed to go about meeting and dating women from online? Is a woman weird for meeting a guy from sites like MySpace and Facebook? Can you actually legitimately meet sane AND hot women from online? Every time there is a new way of doing something it takes time for people to get comfortable with it. that cute girl standing in line at Starbuck’s today are all online. you can use social networking sites to connect with and meet like-minded new friends. the hot bartender. there are well over 200 million members on MySpace alone with around 300. Facebook is close behind with about 250. clubs.000 new users joining every day from around the world.

Do you really want to miss out on such an easy way to meet all these women? I didn’t think so. In addition.Social Superstar tons of women between 34 to 44 as well. there is no “fear of rejection”. When you are relaxed at your house you are more able to come up with an authentic responses. she is just a picture and some text. It’s like owning a bar where the bouncer only let’s in girls that fit exactly what you want. the reasons to add online game as a way to meet and date women is quite compelling. She can’t shoot you down or embarrass you in front of her friends or other people. she gets to see a more accurate picture of who you are while allowing you to learn at your own pace how to successfully interact with women. As you can see. Pacific Islander. THERE IS NO APPROACH ANXIETY ONLINE There is absolutely no social pressure when messaging women online. If a girl does not respond you simply move on…no harm no foul. This is a relief for many guys who have trouble knowing what to say. or Asian Slender or Athletic body No Children Straight Social Drinker Non smoker Some College or College Graduate Within 5 miles of your zip You can literally search for the exact type of woman you are looking for. But it gets even better… IMAGINE A BAR FULL OF WOMEN HANDPICKED BY YOU When you meet women from sites like MySpace and Facebook you can literally browse and filter so that only the types of women you are looking for show up. Say you want a girl who is: Between 22 and 26 5′0″-5′7″ Single/divorced Christian White. You have as much time as you need to craft the perfect response. At the same time you will be corresponding with several different women simultaneously so there is no bother if a particular girl doesn’t respond. Many of the world's best PUA’s and Social 325 . In a sense.

what you look like. Hyves. etc. After all. Think of your profile as the online equivalent of your first impression. Now the question is… HOW DO I SET UP MY PROFILE SO IT ATTRACTS WOMEN? Note: I will be specifically focusing on MySpace and Facebook because these are by far the largest social networking sites on the planet. your profile says a lot about you. what type of lifestyle you live. what kind of friends you have. if other women are attracted to you. your interests (i. From your profile alone. books. and music). favorite movies. HOW TO GET STARTED MEETING ALL THOSE CUTE GIRLS ONLINE The fist crucial step in meeting all those hot girls you see online is setting up your profile correctly. it literally WORKS FOR YOU! It’s like having your own personal PR firm who goes ahead of you and gets all the girls excited about wanting to meet you when you arrive. This is huge! Once you set your profile up correctly.The Best of TSBMAG. your hobbies. you need to create a profile that connects with that type of girl. a girl can figure out if you have any attractive qualities. Remember to create a profile that is appealing to the type of girl you want to attract. But the underlying principles are universal and many of the guys we have successfully coached used them all over the world on sites like Bebo.COM Artists still maintain their online profiles despite meeting women out in person because it is just too good not too. There are many elements that go into setting up your profile correctly. Friendster. Here are the major things to keep in mind as you design your profile: Keep in mind the type of girl you want to attract. what kind of job you have or what you do. If you want a bad girl with tattoos. Match. Orkut. Once again. go to the profiles of the types of girls you want to attract and copy their style or the style of the guy friends they have.e. It will form the basis for what a woman thinks about you and how she will interact with you. Simplicity and Readability 326 . if you are unsure. and somewhat of how popular you are.

You will be perceived as trying too hard to gain approval. you will be perceived as trying too hard to gain approval. DO NOT be overly offensive DO NOT have terrible grammar/misspellings • • • Things you WANT to do in your About Me section: • • • Be Diverse List a variety of music. It is better to be brief yet have variety and keep her guessing. Show her you are not a tool. If you try to write about how cool you are. etc. Things you DONT WANT to do in your About Me section: • DO NOT try to sell yourself by talking about how cool you are. You want your profile to be as easy to read as possible. When to write and what to write Take careful consideration about what you write about yourself. white text on a black background or any light on dark color scheme). the fun things you do. Girls who don’t know you have no reason to spend their time reading about you. and hobby interests. the beautiful women you hang out with every weekend. List movies like The Little Mermaid. Be goofy.Social Superstar Your mom was right about making things legible. They will most likely see this and say “I don’t know you. A good way to start out is to use a solid background with contrasting text colors (i. Women will abandon your profile quickly if it takes too much effort to get an idea of who you are. etc. movies. than to write your whole life story and bore her.e. I don’t care”. the fun things you do. and music by artists like the Spice Girls. You don’t need to go overboard in this area. the beautiful women you hang out with. And girls who don’t know you have no reason to spend their time reading about you unless you’ve compelled them to. 327 . DO NOT write your life story. simplicity and readability is the key.

“I love meeting new people” or “I surround myself with positive. Having standards indicates abundance and a strong sense of identity. You know what you want and you have enough options so that if a girl does not match up. Don’t say “I’m new to this whole MySpace/Facebook thing” or “all my friends are on here so I figured I would create an account. Again. Here are a few examples of disqualifying statements: Rules for being my MySpace/Facebook friend: • • • • • No liars (unless you are flirting) No flaky people No granny panties! (unless you are actually a grandma ) No psycho stalker chicks! I don’t care how hot you think you are! No BORING PEOPLE … You must be fun Another option is to put up a qualifying statement on your page. A disqualifier is any statement that demonstrates you have standards by declaring that the recipient is unqualified or ineligible for you. Here is one that we have used and has been very effective placed under the Who I’d Like to Meet section on MySpace or the About Me section on Facebook: “If you are cute rather than hot. giving her more reason to search for a connection with you. • Be Creative In your About Me section. spontaneous. Use Disqualifying Statements Create a small list of disqualifiers. you want to be an enigma she wants to figure out. you can let her go. fun. but not so much as to bore her. we need just enough to intrigue her.” Talk about things like. petite 328 . be creative. and outrageous people. Going back to the characteristics women screen for. Make her curious to find out more about you.COM • When writing it is better to be brief yet have variety and keep her guessing. You can even leave out your interests.The Best of TSBMAG.” It doesn’t have to be long. clever rather than cool. than to write your whole life story and bore her.

It would be far better to only have those three in which you look your best. some doing something goofy. some of you with your niece or your dog. and see which ones receive the highest rating. women like a man with some depth to him. your page is your way of demonstrating how cool and how socially desirable you are. you just need to add an application like Big Photo or Slideshows. As we have already learned. You don’t want to have twelve pictures of you drinking beer with your buddies. If you do not know what you want. now is the time to sit down and figure it out. then the other seven are creating a bad impression. They want a man with a sense of mystery.Social Superstar rather than slim. Remember. then I would like to meet you. This allows a girl to get a snapshot of how exciting and fun you are.photobucket. If you upload ten pictures and you only look good in three of them. the first step is to upload your pictures to an image hosting site like www. some travel shots. If in doubt. a challenge to figure out. On Facebook. 329 . Embed pictures into your profile We have found that actually embedding pictures into your profile is the easiest and most effective way to make a great first impression on girls. Women like men who know what they want. On Why not make it as good as possible? The following are some guidelines to follow when choosing what pictures to use: Use a variety You want to have pictures depicting you doing a variety of different activities. A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS The pictures you choose to use on your profile are vitally important. Use a range of pictures showing different aspects of your personality.” You must show that you have standards. etc. and that is one of the most important first steps to attracting a woman online. Your pictures can make her curious. Have some action shots. In most cases. It is as if each picture is showing off a different side of your personality. put your pictures up on a photo-rating site like www.HotorNot. these will be a woman’s first impression of or your own MySpace photo album. Choose only the best Choose only the pictures in which you look the best. some partying with hot girls.

which you can get to from the main navigation bar at the top of the page. make sure you are in good shape and doing an activity where it is appropriate to have it off (i. etc. You can find music on MySpace in the Music Using a playlist is even better.jpg” width=”400”> <br /> Where http://www. go out to a club and tell the hottest girl you can find that you need some new MySpace/Facebook pictures to make your ex-girlfriend jealous. About Me. Who I’d like to Meet): <img src=”http://www. at the beach. But just to be safe. Interests.). don’t put up a picture of you shirtless…EVER! OTHER USEFUL ATTRACTION ELEMENTS AND TIPS Use Music Music is a great way to connect with girls.COM Next. Otherwise make it a group picture with cute girls in it.jpg will be re-placed with the URL pointing to your image. By specifying the width property in the <img> tag you ensure that your photos will have a consistent width (the height of the image will be adjusted automatically to maintain the original aspect ratio) That way you can have a whole variety of music. paste the following HTML code into any section you want the photo to show up ( posing in front of the Eiffel Tower.projectplaylist. Girls love to make other girls jealous! Caution: If you are going to put up a picture of you with your shirt off. make it either a really good/professional picture (no wannabe modeling pictures with your shirt off please).The Best of TSBMAG. This technique will ensure that your images are not too large and that they’re easy to view. If you don’t have any.e. The playlist tool we use is: www. We have received so many comments on the songs we have chosen. dancing. etc. 330 . or one of you doing something exciting like surfing. This is just one more way for her to connect with you. rock-climbing. if you are going to put up a picture of just yourself. playing football. Hint: write funny captions to go along with your pictures to demonstrate even more of your personality Just paste the following HTML code above the embed image code shown above: <div><font size=+2>Picture caption</font></div> Main profile picture For your main profile picture.

You don’t randomly give your personal contact information to people you don’t know.text td. 331 .text td. “They all kept getting jealous about who was #1” or “I am a secret agent.} td.text table {height:0. what you wrote. We suggest that you remove all of your personal information such as email addresses and cell phone numbers.text td.text td. If she ever asks you why your friends are hidden.border:0.} td.} </style> We recommend you do this anyway. she will definitely wonder.Social Superstar Hide your Friends List (MYSPACE ONLY) If you are just starting and have no friends. Facebook also lists all of your recent actions on the site through a system called Mini-Feed. just say something like. which you can get using the technique we’ll cover next. so why do it online? While the mini-feed makes it convenient to see what your friends are up to online.text td.text span. td. it would be counterproductive for them to see that you have messaged other girls with the same or even similar messages For this reason.e.text td.text table br.} td.text td. comments you received.” Adjust your Privacy Settings (FACEBOOK ONLY) There is far more of your personal contact information available to the general public on Facebook than on MySpace. td.} td.text table table td {padding:3. td. and even when you add a friend! For the simple fact that you are going to be messaging multiple girls. td.text .text table {background-color:transparent.text td.padding:0.text td. you can place this code in any section to hide your friends list: <style type=”text/css”> td.text table td.text td. td. comments you made.text table table br {display:inline. turning off) most if not all of the notifications.ztext table .text table table table. You can modify your privacy settings by clicking on the “privacy” link next to the “logout” link in the top right corner. and I don’t want to put my friends’ lives in peril.redlink. By default it lists all kinds of information like who you wrote to. If she can’t see your friends and sees a number of comments from gorgeous looking girls.btext {display:none.orangetext15. we recommend you configure the privacy settings for News Feed and Mini-Feed by unchecking (i. they can also see what you are up to.

. The dorkiest girl I can find Can you guess which one you are? Haha…so if you could help me out I will name my first born child after you… ha-ha j/k but I would really appreciate it .(name) These comments will give you social proof.The Best of TSBMAG. show that you have a diverse personality. Could you leave a comment to make her jealous? You know how it is…haha. So when a new girl looks at your page and sees all these other attractive girls writing sexy things about you. Thanks.COM Create Instant Social Proof To get comments on your MySpace page or Facebook wall from beautiful women just use this message: Subject: I was wondering … Body: My ex is stalking my profile. The cutest girl I can find 3.{your name/screen name/nickname} or Subject: Strange Question Body: My crazy friends are sending me on an online scavenger hunt (I didn’t even know they had those?) for my (put in bday or some event that compels her to want to help you) and I have to get a sassy/fun comment on my page from the following: 1. Make your profile easy to read. THINK OF IT AS YOUR OWN PERSONAL COMMERCIAL All in all think about your profile as your own personal commercial. she will wonder what makes you so sexy. It’s brilliant! Note: Make sure to use this technique with girls outside your area. Having your profile set up correctly will literally supercharge your success with women online and put you light 332 . The hottest girl I can find 2. demonstrate that there are a variety of different people that enjoy your company and show that you can have fun and laugh at yourself. This mystery builds attraction. A girl should be able to look at your profile and very quickly get an idea of what you are all about. This adds an air of mystique and ensures you don’t tap out potential girls in your area.

Cheers.Social Superstar years ahead of all those other guys out there leaving your competition in the dust. Remember to have fun with this and if you have any questions feel free to ask. Race 333 .

2. As far as coming up in random searches. in today’s increasingly technological world. flirting online has gone from a geeks. to simply being social. ran. Creating a Great Profile Whether you have a subscription to an online dating service or not. and (2) deliver the goods once someone clicks on your profile.or losers-only pastime to a necessary skill. that can be used in almost any situation. it’s important that you have a great profile. running…). it’s important to understand how search engines work.COM Day 16 Tips for Flirting Online Written by Honey Originally Published: 07/02/2008 Flirting consists of a variety of tactics. both physical and verbal. to scoring a one-night stand. The vast majority of our flirting techniques were developed for situations in which people were connecting face-to-face. odds are that you have a profile on some kind of social networking site. Most searches that you will run are “keyword” searches (though many online dating services let you set all types of parameters via advanced search forms). There are three main types of online flirting: 1. to run a successful search you are better off putting in a noun: runner.The Best of TSBMAG. Because people are becoming increasingly accessible online (you can find out far more about far more people in a day via their profiles than you could in person). Later-stages flirting: keeping the momentum. Verbs don’t usually fare too well in keyword searches because there are so many conjugations (run. 3. Pre-emptive flirting: creating a great profile. 334 . To have a great profile. If you are the one searching. However. you need to (1) come up in as many searches as possible. We flirt for a variety of purposes–from screening for a long-term partner. Early-stages flirting: the first few e-mails and/or texts.

my advice about the first few e-mails (or online chats. For heaven’s sake. sipping on a Jeremiah Red and talking about how Robert Downey Jr. When I told my buddy that I thought The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor stood a chance of being decent. he almost spit his beer out! What a waste of a great porter. List specifics. For example. While you don’t want to go on and on. However. Tell stories. or “poke” them or any of that gay sh#t. and once they have an answer in their head. if the online world is like a giant bar. If you’re running a search and come up empty the first time. one caveat is never. ever. This is especially important because no matter which of the three terms someone searches for. Once someone gets to your profile. you can easily increase the likelihood of coming up in other people’s searches by using synonyms. to catch people you might have missed. you can find me at BJ’s brewery with friends. and watch movies. For anyone who’s been on these types of sites for any amount of time at all. List specifics. And don’t be afraid to ask questions—a nice rhetorical question gets the other person thinking about how they’d answer. these half-ass forms of communication are reviled 335 . Well. if you like to run. they’re halfway to e-mailing you! There’s a huge difference between the following: • • “I like to hang out with friends. that’s no accident. Man up and give the lady (or fella) some real communication. if you’re into that—I’m not. you could try some synonyms as well. you might also put jogger or marathon in your profile. have fun. How about you and I go see it and then tell my friend how wrong he was about Jet Li?” Now the first thing you’ll probably notice is that the second example is much longer. for reasons I’ll explain) is pretty similar to my advice about profiles.” “On any given Tuesday. the two big keys to a great profile are making sure your profile is upbeat (no one wants to date a bummer) and saying something of substance.Social Superstar When you are creating your own profile.’s performance saved Iron Man. then how can you come off as a person of value if you don’t have anything to offer beyond clichés? The First Few E-mails Unsurprisingly. the most important thing is specificity. Ask questions. Tell stories. “wink” at someone. you’ll come up.

• • I’m not a believer in asking for the digits but rather proposing the meetup.” Type real words.The Best of TSBMAG. thank them for doing so. When he e-mailed to ask. I said.e. you should definitely respond back with an email. As a question that escalates the interaction to the next level.” He said. and our first couple of interactions followed the pattern above. but last summer I found an abandoned Jack Russell in the parking lot of my complex. if someone winks at you and you at all like their profile. After a couple exchanges he tried to add me as a friend and couldn’t because he didn’t know my last name. and word it as a compliment ("I couldn’t help but be excited when I noticed that you are an animal lover”). a phone call or a meeting. Say something specific that you liked about their profile. “How about beer on Friday?” And that was our first date… The reason that I’m going to come out against online chat is that (and I know this is a personal pet peeve) I hate all that misspelling and “textspeak. if you’re too chicken to make a real first move. so half your work is already done for you! You can tease them about using a wink at some point later on. in a seemingly contradictory move. and he e-mailed me back to say that we had a favorite author in common. I don’t add people that I haven’t met in person. i. “I’m sorry.COM and make you seem wussy (which. only one of us bites…”). Tell a story from your own experience that relates to what you liked about their profile (”I’ve never been a dog person. and also starts to build a non-threatening sexual vibe (”Maybe we should meet up at the dog park Saturday afternoon? I promise. I sent him a one-line e-mail. The formula for a great early e-mail is pretty simple: • • If they e-mailed or winked at you first. The reason for this is that the other person will then offer their digits without you having to weaken your position at all by asking! I met my BF on MySpace. I looked for his owners. Now. You know they’re interested. Now a year later he’s there to greet me when I get home from work!”). you kinda are). but never found them. damnit! And since I type about 70 wpm 336 .

and make sure you’re not e-mailing a work account. tone. not to come across as desperate or stalker-ish. Best of luck! 337 . the goal is to sustain momentum. make a mild sexual comment. or just say how much you’re looking forward to your next meetup. not overwhelming her with super-long e-mails (which also kind of make you look like a loser who has nothing better to do in your spare time). Tease. The big tips: Again. and knowing when enough’s enough. since so many nuances. use real words. Don’t send more than two e-mails per day. and the keys are paying attention to the other person. it’s pretty tough for me to come off as anything except overly chatty. a flirty e-mail is a great tool to keep in touch. Again. spell everything correctly. • Keep your e-mails brief and stick to one topic. and body language is lost when it’s just a window on someone’s computer screen. and don’t you dare send that second e-mail until you hear back from her first. and keep your interactions light and fun. Keep it light! You should be making deep connections in person—trying to do so over e-mail just makes you a bummer.” It’s just much easier to put your best foot forward when you use e-mail as your medium. you should be teasing her with the promise of your presence.Social Superstar and hardly anyone else does. Keeping the Momentum Once you’ve met in person. sustain momentum. • • Flirting is an art. If they suggest chatting. I like e-mail because you can control the length and content as well as proofread for spelling and other errors before you hit “send. go for it—just remember the possible cons. avoiding clichés at all costs.

like the rule book suggests. I have been on dates with guys and literally like 2 minutes after the date they are messaging me and telling me what a great time they had on the date and how they would like to see me again. shopping centre or the tennis club. You think 'hey she is busy' and you try again later that same day. Because when you can't wait for the 48 hours you appear needy and in need of a life. to ask her out on a date. To some of you it doesn’t make sense. She says that she will get back to you and she never does. You see a hot chick at a club. make her laugh and somehow manage to get her number.. 338 . So you call again and finally you get an answer. You build up the guts to talk to her. thinking to yourself “where did it go wrong?” So here is the thing.COM Day 17 Phone Game Strategy Written by Hot Alpha Female Originally Published: 07/03/2008 So let me paint the picture. Some of you may be baffled by this whole situation.Don’t Contact Her for At Least 48 Hours I know it sounds hard doesn’t it? But you have to stick by these rules. You still don’t get a response. You talk to her expecting that things are going to pick up where you left off and are utterly stunned when she starts making excuses as to why she can’t meet up with you. You end up calling her a couple of days later. You think to yourself “SWEET!! I’m in”. She doesn’t pick up. You are left scratching your head. Here is the thing.The Best of TSBMAG. Sound good? Let's get started. Rule # 1 . Well I’m going to lay out for you what is REALLY happening and what you really SHOULD be doing..

So in other words you are going to have to look like something that she would want to date/buy. Now that doesn’t mean being something that you are not. It's like an instant turn off. Now as a general rule with messaging keep it short and sweet. You can mess with a girl and pretend that you are not interested. stalker. stick to the rule of messaging her first before you call her. But it does mean that for the moment you operate within a certain guidelines until you have internalized all this “game stuff” … so bear with me ok? So as part of this.Social Superstar Then I have also had guys who send me a message straight after a date and then send me another one 30 minutes later wondering why I haven’t sent them a reply yet. So do it not only as a favor for me. but for all the other poor girls out there. At the absolute 339 . The only thing that runs through my mind is. get a life. It means that you can actually think about what you want to write. In fact we like them more to begin with.. Now the main agenda with text is to warm her up. Every girl is comfortable with texting. Just make sure that when you follow this rule that you don’t wait too long after 48 hours.. Let her know that you are on her radar and that you will be in contact with her soon. you don’t have to think on the spot. Anything more than 4 days and the girl (if she is interested in you) starts to get pissed because you didn’t call her within that “calling period” and she assumes that you are not interested. but this is not one of those instances. See it's great for us and is great for you too. and ewwww.Send Her A Text Msg First You know scoring a date is kind of like making a sale. but don’t get into these messaging conversations. Except the item that you are selling is yourself. Rule # 2 . And there is no logical way to explain it. Banter a lot. If a guy texts us within 2 days of us handing out our number then that is sufficient enough for us to know that you are interested without appearing really needy and wussy.

This will bring her back to that place and help her feel more comfortable with you. doesn’t mean that you don’t have your work cut out for you! The first thing that you want to do when you call the girl is to break the ice and get her laughing. because she would have to be close to her phone in order to send the msg right?! Brilliant idea and I suggest that all you guys use it. He found that significantly increased his chance of getting to speak to her. because they feel in control by being the ones to have the last say. The best way to do this is to refer to something that happened when you last saw her. If a girl doesn’t think that she will be comfortable with you or will be able to trust you then she will not even consider going on that date with you. This means that when the conversation is nearing an end. Some of my friends have trouble with this. That’s the thing with phone calls. He would msg this girl and then when she replied back. Essentially you want to get her back into the same state as she was in when she gave you that phone number.Keep It Light And Keep It Casual Ok so when you call her for the first time after she has given you her phone number then it's not a good time to start going into a deep and meaningful conversation. then he would call her within a minute or so. Maybe refer to a joke that you had previously found funny with her and give her updated content on it. Rule # 4 .The Best of TSBMAG.Msg Her and Then Call Her Ok so I have to admit that this is not something that I came up with. But just because it’s a short amount of time. You want to be able to establish comfort before you can even consider asking her out. 340 . But you have to look at it from the point of view that YOU are the one in control because you have the strength to stop the messaging first =) Rule # 3 . You actually want to keep things fairly casual and most importantly keep it brief.COM maximum make sure that you only send 2-3 msgs in one conversation. you are the one that has to stop sending her msgs. Always be the one to end the messaging conversation. But one of the things that I heard one of the guys does on David D’s cds.

is know you. There is nothing worse than a long winded voicemail msg with a guy who doesn’t know what he is talking about. then you can say something a little ball busting and then get her to give you a call back. Rule # 5 .Keep It Short and Sweet This kind of follows on from the other points. Break the ice and get her to laugh before you even consider asking her out. So in regards to what you should say. All you have to get a chick to do. She doesn’t have to know about all your past relationships before you guys go on a date. Two or more becomes stalkerish. I know it sounds silly but its true and this is what goes through a chick's head. like you and trust you . When calling a girl. keep it light and keep it casual. Like 5 minutes. Give her the gift of missing you ok? So with a voice mail you need to remember to keep it short and sweet. As a general rule with this whole gaming and dating thing … Less is always MORE! Seriously… You don’t have to get an update of what this chick has been doing in the past 2 days. If you are constantly trying to impede on her space then she is totally not going to appreciate it. When courting a girl. But seriously don’t talk too long. just leave a short msg and then hang up.Social Superstar So remember the rule. Rule # 6 . you need to remember to give her the space to think about you. be prepared for a voicemail and know what you are going to say as well.. You don’t have to repeat your number and all that crap.Leave one voicemail that’s IT! If you have to leave a voicemail then make sure that its only one.and then you can get her to go anywhere and do just about anything with her. who is wasting your time and YOUR credit! Random Tips 341 ..

. then your chances of getting to talk to her again are much higher. Here’s a tip. and this message contained some call to action on her behalf. There is no point in doing the wrong things over and over hoping that you will get a positive result in the end. make her laugh and have a good time. You have to do what works. then you need to know that you are going to have to do some major work on getting this girl to go on a date with you. When a girl talks with ease.The Best of TSBMAG. Now with that said … Now I want to see better conversion rates ok? *winks* 342 . Remember to warm a girl up to you. If you find her being more quiet that usual. Keep it short and sweet and always leave her wanting more. then there is something up and she is not comfortable. Firstly you should message first. because A) she thinks that you are a freak or B) she hasn’t warmed up to you yet. In regards to what you should talk to her about … your main aim is to bust her balls.. If you message a girl and she doesn’t message you back. Persistence is not the only tool you need. If the girl messages back. it means that she is comfortable with you.COM Some of you may be wondering how many times you should call before giving up. You can tell that a girl has warmed up to you when she is laughing at your jokes and the conversation is flowing.

use it! Don’t use cutesy textspeak (ur instead of your. WTF is a good one. you’re coming from a position of high value and it shows you have a command of language. Texting has similar properties to flirting over email (or sending messages using facebook or myspace). 4. Flirting. To get the high value woman. Obviously. keep your language as tight as possible. because you avoid the profanity but still express surprise or shock. I’m a bit older. Quick scheduling or announcements when I’m on the go. I want to say a few words about writing style.Social Superstar Day 18 Text Game for the Pua Written by Lance Originally Published: 07/07/2008 Text game is an integral part of my arsenal. and the girls I socialize with are high value woman in their mid or late 20’s that are educated. Everyone has a cell phone. I use a few acronyms. 3. I have a few exceptions here. and pretty much everyone has it on their 343 . Maintaining a connection. Using textspeak on a 28 year woman with an MBA would totally deattract her. etc). but the quality that sets it apart is immediacy. flirting via text is very effective. consider this. Why the big deal about grammar and spelling? Because if you’re using good English. Here’s how it breaks down: Flirting When used in the right ways. I’ll focus on 1 . around 30. Before I get started. language is part and parcel of what pickup is all about. and supplement your lines with smiley's and other emoticons.3. I use texting for the following reasons: 1. use punctuation. Good spelling and punctuation. Escalation. This also sets you apart from the legions of dorks who can’t spell worth a crap. 2. Since item 4 is fairly self-explanatory. Also. Okay. such as OMG or WTF.

Here are a couple of examples: “Hey. you should banter back and forth for a bit. you’re a great kisser WOW!” “You’re the cutest Leo EVER rawr. It’s like playing a little game. conversation was great. either in the same night or the next morning. Once she responds. If you send a text. you would love it!” “Guess what I’m doing right now…it’s f’ing awesome!” “Just read your horoscope. it just depends on the direction you want to go. 344 . Everyone loves to receive text messages! I haven’t delved into this. then you’re more popular…at least that seems to be the psychology.” “Had a blast. This dialogue establishes that you’re a normal guy and not a player (ha-ha) or merely a flirt.The Best of TSBMAG. I’ll use texts as a direct compliment. If anyone wants to dive into point. interesting. There’s nothing wrong with a compliment as long as you’ve established a strong masculine frame during the date.COM person at all times.” This creates a strong statement of interest and let’s her know that you’re absolutely interested in going further. This gets her thinking about you and this method can be used to maintain a connection or escalate. the other person is going to read it within a few seconds. I often do this after a first date. If you’re a chick and you’re getting dozens more texts than the next girl. Conversely. I’d love to hear some perspectives. The key is being playful. but I think some people derive a certain degree of social clout from the number of texts they get. One way I flirt over text is to send messages that will compel her to write back. “You looked totally sexy in that dress. Not only that. just ate lunch at this great Thai place. It’ll pump her up and get her thinking about how cool you are. such as asking how her day went. if you send an email. I’ll use this to spur a longer text conversation and then mix in some “normal” text conversation. it’s possible that person won’t read it until the evening or the next day if you’re sending it to a personal account (and you should…don’t send flirty emails to a work or business account). it’s crazy.” All of these messages are intended to come out of the blue and compel her to write back and ask what it is you’re talking about. but getting a text is like a little treat that breaks up the monotony of your day. ie basic flirting. and fun.

Usually what I do when maintaining a connection is to offer a bit of value. if you did a quick 5′ pickup and number closed a girl with a minimum of sexual framing. Let’s face it. you can hit her like this: “Hey. I’ve never met a girl who didn’t like getting her horoscope. you can make one up on the spot and sex it up a little. This can be great fun and it’s an easy way to escalate. if you’re really slick. what are you doing??” “I loved your glasses. The key here is to flirt and be a bit mysterious so that she’s compelled to see you when you ask for a first meetup.” 345 . As with everything else you should calibrate. such as a laugh. I rarely do fluff talk in these instances because you’ll risk losing the attraction by seeming mundane. Your goal should be very simple. drama. I’ll text her just a little bit during the week to remind her who I am. the craziest thing just happened to me!” “Your horoscope is insane today.” “We should have talked to you longer DAMN you’re cute. you’ve got that sexy nerdy look and hit her with one. I’ll mix this in with a couple of emails. and hot monkey sex. Here’s an example: “The planets are aligned–today is a day for secrets. and a phone call or two to maintain the connection until I see her again.Social Superstar Maintain a Connection If I’ve number closed a chick and I know I can’t see her again until the next weekend. but I think it’s really true. OR. I like texting during the day when I know she’s at work. Keep in mind that pickups are tenuous affairs and flakes can happen at any time…texting helps to cement a future meetup. Monday at the office sucks (if you’ve got an office job) and getting flirty texts can be a real pick-me-up. some MySpace stuff. Don’t be afraid to cut loose. or a horoscope (astrology is chick crack). For instance. but here are another couple of examples that initiate a value giving conversation: “Holy sh* it’s the hot guy you met an hour ago. just make her smile! Credit Sean Deacon on that one.” What’s great about the horoscope thing is you can look up the quickie horoscopes on astrology.” Escalation Texts are a great way to introduce or maintain a sexual frame. a two line story. You can use the same lines from above.

Let’s say you’ve had sex once and you’re setting a date for next Friday night. I’m a big fan of these: “Had a blast. you can and should use text as a way to maintain attraction. All of these lines are examples and you should easily be able to come up with your own.” If you’re deep into a sexual frame with a chick. I’ll still flirt because it’s a hell of a lot of fun and it gets her hot for the Lance cock. sexy texts. this shit kills. or if you’ve already had sex with her and plan on doing it again (i. but you’re going to have to work extra hard for me. Even if I’m dating someone and I know I can nail her whenever I want.COM This way you’re either establishing a sexual tone or maintaining one and getting her excited about thinking about you. you’re getting spanked. She’ll follow your lead and likely respond back with flirty. Hit her with texts that have a sexual tone and just plow forward.” “Three guesses what I’m doing…if you get it wrong. Chicks eat this up.” “Happy hour on Friday…Don’t worry.The Best of TSBMAG.e. 346 . OMG I could barely keep my hands off you!!” “I can tell you’re going to be trouble. Try these: “Okay. This shows you’re playful and flirty and will get her into a sexual state of mind.)” Work your basic push-pull and teasing in there. I won’t let you take advantage of me . dating or FBs). and if you’re calibrated properly and pumping out good lines. I’ll meet you for drinks.” “My mom warned me about girls like you. You can do pretty much the same things if you’ve already had a date with a minimum of Kino or maybe just a kiss close.

Pick the right venue. The only thing I do before dates is have two fun routines ready. and even if you can it would be a stupid waste of energy.Social Superstar Day 19 How to Go on First Dates Written by Roosh V Originally Published: 07/08/2008 Besides sex. 3. She’s more nervous than you are. The worst thing you can do is lounge around at home all day in front of your computer and then go out without talking beforehand. ready to give a “primetime” night to someone you just met. I also remind myself of a handful of innocent touching moves that prime her for the kiss. There is no way you can memorize enough routines for a two hour or more date. first dates are the most fun part of the game. Even if the date is short of a blockbuster. Weekend dates send the wrong message that you value her too much. usually the cube and some type of fake palm read. Plus chances are she will be busier on weekends anyway. If not then dates will be a challenge. Start the date at a quiet bar well after dinner so you don’t have to worry about getting food. You have two people who barely know each other alone and isolated with sexual tension and possibility in the air. but if your goal is to get into her pants as fast as possible. Pick the right day. 4. Since first dates are mostly a talking affair. especially if you haven’t kissed her yet. well. Quick tip: On your way to dates call up a couple friends and shoot the shit for a while. Don’t try to do a first date on a weekend. Stick to Monday through Thursday for the first date. The more you have your internal game straightened out and 347 . Preparation. especially with the pressure of getting laid hanging over your head. You’re going to have to be. You can get a lot done taking girls to coffee and ice cream dates. simply because she’s a girl and we all know the ones who can’t even go to the bathroom without a friend. you want that part of your brain ready. real and this is where I hope your vibe is fun and interesting. Here are a few things to make them more successful. 1. But I guarantee you she is more nervous than you are. It’s natural to be nervous. 2. it’s very hard not to get at least a make out if she’s had three drinks in her. you must go for drinks.

While you don’t want to sound like a total idiot on the date. Plus even if the date goes well. Even if you arrive early. Think of her on a stage. 5. As you probably noticed. Focus on escalation. I was too scared I would get rejected and look like an idiot. the less work you have to do on a second.COM believe a girl should prove her value to you. That’s your number one goal. A little bit of preparation goes a long way in dates and it makes sense to do because you worked hard to meet her and get her out and don’t want to blow it with stupid mistakes. I sucked it up when I had enough and just started approaching like a machine. you can’t make the assumption there will be a second. I cannot stress how important this is. the reason you kiss her will be more because of the touching than the conversation. The first half hour will have almost no touching probably. a mindset that keeps your game on without trying to game. Go for the lay. 7. the less you will be nervous. Whether this is reality or not doesn’t matter… just believe it. This is especially useful on dates when you're focused less on routines than when you first approach. Even if you don’t think you will get the lay on the same night. where she judges you and picks for flaws. I have a friend who shows up fifteen minutes late and I’m not sure that is extreme or not but I’m always at least five minutes later. it’s still a smart idea to go for it as you drop her home because it makes your job much easier for the second date. Show up late. A touch here or there that gets extended as the night goes on. 6. but then the drinks get in your system and it becomes natural. It took me about six years of constant practice but I figured out the “vibe”. then touching her hands and putting your arm behind her in the booth of the lounge you picked. twirling and spinning for your pleasure. I made A LOT of stupid mistakes when first starting out in the game. I also stumbled on half a dozen touching 348 . most of the work in turning out a good first date is done before you even show up. The farther you get on the first date. How about if her long lost ex boyfriend calls the next day? You’ll kick yourself if you didn’t push as far as you could get. You want to stir up some anxiety and fear that she’s being stood up so that her insecurities are driven inward instead of on you. going on dates every week and noting what worked and what didn’t. The kiss will be a foregone conclusion. mill around for a while until you are late.The Best of TSBMAG. but even before that I remember my strategy to getting kisses used to be hoping and wishing she’d make the move and do it on her own.

Social Superstar moves that help escalate on dates and in the bedroom. and also the idea of the multi-venue date system to increase rapport and trust. 349 . I share all this and a lot more in my book Bang. Of course it’s backed by my Bust out the Condoms Guarantee.

She never called me back. all she wrote was “I had a good time too. About that time I went on Match. We made arrangements to meet. What day this week do you want to play tennis” (we had talked about playing tennis on the date) She didn’t respond to the email for a couple days.The Best of TSBMAG. things went even better. The conversation was flowing naturally. or that I just couldn’t attract the ones I wanted. we were laughing a lot.COM Day 20 How to Get a Day Two Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/08/2008 A few years ago I was going through a slump with women. it was that the ones I was meeting just weren’t up to my standards. doing shots together. Within minutes of talking to her I was already feeling like this was going to be different. she came back to my house for a bit. It was not so much that I wasn’t meeting any. Although I didn’t get a kiss that night. and I would soon have to break their hearts.” She never mentioned the tennis invite. And although it had only been one day since I saw her. Something along the lines of “had a really great time last night. You are a really funny guy. The night I got her email I called her. Mid way through the date I was already imagining our future together. I was really starting to believe that either there were no quality girls left in the world. I sent her an email that night. it felt like an eternity. I was sensing a connection I didn’t feel with the other girls. I waited a week then emailed her again “Guess we didn’t connect as much 350 . When she did respond. It was depressing me. and the evening ended on a high She didn’t answer so I left a message. The next day I couldn’t stop thinking about her. She would write me these long rambling emails at four in the morning (that were just the most amusing things to read)… and I soon found myself very attracted to her. A little while after going on the site I started an online flirtation with this cute Filipino girl. When she arrived at my house. These girls were falling for me quickly. My better judgment told me to wait a day or two before contacting her again… but I couldn’t help it. she was even hotter than her online photos portrayed her to be. and teasing one another… it was genuinely the best date I had in months. When we got to the bar.

Below I’m going to go over the mistakes I made on that meeting. 351 . The one girl I actually felt a connection with didn’t even have interest in a second date. I was complimenting her way too much. I let my guard down. You’re really nice… I’m just not sure what I’m looking for right now in terms of relationships. Because I felt so comfortable with her I felt at ease to tell her about my recent trouble finding a girl I really liked. I would sit back and let them prove their worth to me.” AGHHH I kept bringing up plans for a second date. Because I felt there was this “connection” there. I dropped all “player” mode and started to open up with her way to soon. and it will immediately lower your value and put her in the position of being the prize. She wrote back the next day saying “Sorry I’ve just been busy. and she asked “what?” and I said “You’re just really cute. I truly believed she was feeling the same way. I was way too attached to the outcome of the date. I kept telling her how fun she was. The mistake I made on this date was that I gave too much away.Social Superstar as I thought” or something AFC like that. I remember at one point I was smiling. We hadn’t even finished our first date and I was already asking her to play tennis together. This put me in the position to be the prize. Normally I would never show my hand on a date… I would always keep the girl guessing what was going through my mind. Girls can sense when you’re investing more than they are. My hope is that by reading through these mistakes I made you might be able to notice a thing or two that you’re doing that might be preventing you from getting a second date. to go see a movie she mentioned. Mistakes that will Prevent Day Two Too quickly deciding that you like her.” BAM it was over. The previous girls that I was dating I was always the one doing the judging. With the Filipino girl. Resorting to Nice Guy Lines. I began really analyzing what went wrong… and it became painfully obvious why she had no desire to see me again. I decided too soon that I liked her. Once I decided that I liked her I started working too hard to impress her. I really believed that I had experienced a connection with the Filipino girl.

she quickly took the role of leader.The Best of TSBMAG. Let her Call the Shots. The whole time she’s waiting for my call my value is increasing in her mind by leaps and bounds. Remember. a large part of attraction occurs when the girl is away from you and thinking about you. even on dates with girls I didn’t like. In Bang. I threw it all away by contacting her the next night.’ When you don’t call. I used the fact that we had such a good time as a reason to call the next day. always be the one who ends it. her brain is going “Does he want me?” That is what you want her brain thinking. she was the one who suggested that we move to a table in the back. By making immediate plans you don’t give the girl the joy of wondering when she’s going to hear from you again. Although we were having a good time together. But that particular night I felt compelled to try to make plans to immediately see her again. Here I was 2 hours into a great date and I was scared to leave my hand on her waist for more than a second. I even broke one of my cardinal date rules. I was in “nice guy mode”. and when I did I would quickly pull away as to not scare her.” That was something that I always naturally did before her. If she really had a good time she would be going crazy waiting for my call. Normally. the more time she is going to spend thinking about you. 352 . she was the one who suggested we go on the dance floor. and was scared to ruin the evening by “moving too fast. Contacting her too Soon After Day One. and have always naturally done since her. The minute I contacted her. About midnight she is the one to say “it's getting late we should get going.” I would very rarely make any physical contact. Once we got to the bar. Roosh says “always say ’see you soon’ when you end a date. She was the one suggesting what to drink. When the bar got crowded. when the DJ played a song she liked. The less sure she is in her status with you.” Trying to Plan the Next Meeting Before the Date Ended. I would be advancing towards sex after an hour into the date. It was like I was so scared of making a wrong move that I gave all power to her. her brain went “OK I have this guy… now let me decide if I want him.COM Not Escalating Kino. The fact that we had such a good time should have been used as a reason to wait a few days to call.

Unfortunately I wasn’t. I still believe I could have savaged it if I was able to stay cool during our contacts post date. 353 . I got needy and contacted her right away. If you follow his strategy and avoid the mistakes listed in this lesson than you should be having no trouble getting second dates. Whenever she delayed contacted me. And when I sensed she was blowing me off… I did the worst possible thing my sending her a message stating my feelings and trying to guilt her into seeing me again.Social Superstar Acting Needy When She Wasn’t Responding Quick Enough. So how do you get a day two? If you want to know how to get a day two… the answer is to not make these mistakes on day one. As many mistakes as I made on the date itself. Roosh gave you a perfect strategy for day one.

Friends have several things in common.The Best of TSBMAG. there was an undercurrent of attraction that can’t be ignored. though usually it does.COM Day 21 Building Sexual Tension Written by Evil Woobie Originally Published: 07/10/2008 Sexual tension happens when two individuals feel attracted to each other. and the onlooker throws his soda at the screen. At one or the other’s place. It doesn’t always lead to sex. nothing happens. mind you. at least not yet. the devil called ‘friendship conscience’ comes in to ruin everything. the viewer would be most likely banging his head on his popcorn saying “get on with it already!” The main trouble is that whenever we are in alone dates.” And so. and could go on and on for a lifetime without the individuals concerned acting on it. it’s the ‘chemistry’ that happens between individuals who like each other. In fact.Not porn. At what point does the attraction build so that individuals enjoying a platonic friendship just let go and freely act on the attraction? This happens when sexual tension peaks. we’ve known each other too long to let something like a relationship ruin our friendship. they communicate a lot and spend time together. In simple terms. but don’t have sex. We both know we are not ready for that. Escalating the Sexual Tension Here are some subtle things a guy can do to fan the flames of burning attraction and cross the border between friends and friends-withbenefits: 1. When Sparks Fly Extreme attraction develops under the safe haven of friendship. Think Top Gun (Tom Cruise) 354 . The following words echo through our minds: “Hey. watch a movie with a story line that involves sexual tension . I dated a guy who I shared a wonderful friendship with before going for the plunge. if our wholesome scenes were to be made into a movie. We’d see each other constantly and while all the things we did were wholesome. but one that has a gripping plot and an explosive love scene.

This is because you feel protected from an extreme reaction by your monitor and the x-mark on top of your browser. Online chat .e. rapid heartbeat. The trick is not to sound too eager. now it’s time to let her know that you think she’s hot. Some studies have shown that good horror films can be more sexually arousing than romance or even porn. bit by bit. make her feel that her voice and the theme of your conversation are turning you progressively on. Or better yet. Once you overcome the sexual tension that’s been plaguing your relationship. ditch the romance movies and rent a thriller. 2.There are things that you can tell a person you feel attraction for online that you cannot say to her face. this could lead to more prolific things. stimulated senses.While you bore her with the details of your soccer practice. say “when a girl kisses my ear…” or something similar. this will translate as sincere admiration more than harassment. particularly if she’s feeling a bit naughty. It took all of my self control to prevent myself from just kissing you in a dark corner when we met for lunch” will convey the message that you appreciate her efforts to look her best. Because you’re friends. while sharing yours. Sex is not the End. If you must describe making love. Saying something like “you really looked sexy today during class. regardless if it developed into a more serious one or not 355 . being very. And for goodness’ sake. “I just took a shower”). She already knows that you like her. very good friends. very scared is always an excuse to cuddle up. but the Start of Better Things You are still very. Encourage her to talk about her fantasies. Give her the power of seduction. casually mention that you’re wearing only boxers because the humidity is killing you (or my favorite. Besides. 3. do NOT mention another girl’s name.Social Superstar and Disclosure (Demi Moore). you are now free to continue a stronger friendship that will last for years and years to come. Sexy Phone Conversation . Since you know that she’s also into you. The basis of which is that fear results in the same biological effects as sexual arousal i.

A Guideline for keeping your place clean 1. floors. Dust. your place should provide some interesting conversation pieces for those visiting. Your place should serve a couple purposes. Your best self that is. The most important areas are surfaces that are visible such as corners. Second.The Best of TSBMAG. One of the most important ways to make your place a comfortable place for both you and the women in your life to spend time at is to keep it clean. you should feel comfortable there. tables. you don’t want to overwhelm visitors with your personal taste. The easiest way to relieve that tension is to have a bunch of interesting pictures. Many times you will have someone you barely know back at your place. 2. Get rid of stains. Stains just reek of low class. Focus your dusting on everything that can be seen. Although you want create an “at home feel” for yourself.000 a year. First. Third. TV. If your floor has splashes of spaghetti sauce. While your choice of decor may change. Obviously if you are in high school or college your place is going to look a little different than someone out of college making $100. or decor for them to comment on. or your counter is filled with grease… 356 . the fundamentals will always stay the same. The more comfortable they feel at your place the more likely they will be to spend time there. What your goal should be is for your place to be a reflection of yourself. your place should provide an environment that makes the women feel insanely comfortable.COM Day 22 Preparing Your Bachelor Pad Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/11/2008 This lesson is going to be a guideline for some general rules when it comes to maintaining your place. furnishing. sofa.

A Guideline for keeping your place smelling good There is nothing that will turn a woman off quicker than walking into a place that smells like crap. It is important to get other people’s perspective on the smell of your place. Remember. You want to use this for your benefit and not against you. If your couches have stains on them cover them with some kind of soft blanket.Social Superstar get it up. and glass table. If you’ve been living with the smell for awhile chances are you won’t even notice it. It's always safe to constantly be clearing it. The last thing you want is a girl not coming over because she’s too grossed out to use the bathroom. If there is one area that girls will judge you the most on it's the way you keep your bathroom. 357 . your desk is in order. Keep the place stocked with toilet paper. Get rid of all hair in tub and sink. The sense of smell is closely associated with arousal. Clean your computer area. Your bathroom must be impeccable. The same can be said for mirrors and glass tables. Make sure the toilet bowl smells good and looks clean. The other rooms I would recommend using candles. and most importantly… CLEAR YOUR BROWSING HISTORY ON YOUR COMPUTER. mirrors. Bad smelling homes are immediately associated with dirty people. You should have air fresheners for the kitchen and bathroom. 5. doesn’t necessarily look clean to them. Make sure your computer is dusted off. Windows are an easy thing to clean and will make the room appear much nicer when they don’t have dust and smudges reflecting off of them. 4. This is often a spot you will find yourself at with a girl listening to music or watching a video clip. Keep the towels hanging nicely. what looks clean to us. 3. I can’t tell you how many guys I know have messed things up with a girl by giving her the opportunity browse through his computer while he was in the shower. Make sure all stains and crud. You never know what’s on there. Wipe down windows. or anything that would gross a girl out is gone. Candles smell good and create a nice atmosphere.

sneakers lying all over our bedroom. either throw them away or put them in the basement or garage. pants. Put your clothes away. Especially in the summer time. 358 . Lighting is one the most important elements of creating a good ambiance.The Best of TSBMAG. • Dirty sheets. movie posters. they should not be the most prominent items on display. While you want to reflect your personality you don’t want to look like The 40 Year old Virgin with rooms filled with toys. This is so simple. I would usually recommend purchasing a dimmer that allows you to pull the lights up or down based on the mood. and pillows. While all of these items have a place in your home. Don’t leave random stuff lying around. blankets. yet so many of us continue to leave shirts. It communicates that you are a disorganized person. Dump ashtrays regularly Take out the garbage daily Put gym gear in the laundry room Food remains should be wiped up immediately • • • • A Guideline for keeping the place neat and tidy • Get rid of all clutter. If there are items laying around that you no longer make use of. Decor This is the area where your personal taste sometimes has to be compromised a bit. these need to be changed often.COM Below are some certain items you want to be aware of that may be contributing to a bad smell in your place. • • A Guideline for making your place more comfortable to women Lighting Lighting makes a huge difference in the appearance of your place. and sports memorabilia.

Beverages You always want to have either bottled or filtered water available. and then slowly decorate the place to match that style. pictures. When a girl comes back to your place. you want to make sure that your glasses and silverware are always clean.Social Superstar The best idea is to find a style that you like. This new strategy of decorating my place over the course of a couple months allowed me to search these sites. Once I knew what style I was going for I began searching for items on Ebay and Amazon that would fit into the decor. Bedding It goes without saying that you want your bed to be inviting as possible. it's always nice to be able to offer for her to join you in a glass a wine. Another good habit to get into is making your bed every morning. I also tend to keep a six pack in the fridge. Once you have a good mattress purchase a nice comforter set to go along with it. It is a safe bet to always have a couple bottles of wine lying around. My old strategy caused me to purchase a lot of cheap items all at once. For me. I would buy items as I could afford them. Entertainment and Props 359 . and when I found something I liked. never knows when he’ll be taking a new girl home. he must always be prepared for an overnight guest. and window treatments online. I found several magazine articles that celebrated the style of Buenos Aires and then I created a look around those. Making her a margarita is always a nice way to break the tension and enjoy a good drink. The best way to do this is to not cheap out on a good mattress. In the past I would try to go out and decorate my new place in a weekend. I find the best way to shop for home decor is online. A fun thing to do is have some frozen cocktails on hand. I painted the place with Latin colors and then slowly found items that complimented the room. purchase it as the money became available. wall decorations. I bought 90% of the framed art work. and stock a small bar with liquor. On that note. Since a true player. I decided I wanted my place to have the feel of Buenos Aires. You always want to keep about four pillows on your bed.

The Best of TSBMAG.COM

I mentioned earlier that your place should provide some interesting conversation pieces. This means that you should frame some “story worthy” photos and have them lying around. These photos will serve to demonstrate your personality as well as offer you a chance to tell some good stories. I mentioned yesterday how a good coffee table book can initiate conversation and break the tension of bringing a girl back your place. It's not a bad idea to keep some props lying around. Props include things like personality tests, interesting quizzes, this lie detector test, or other fun games. It's also not a bad idea to keep a stack of reliable DVDs lying around. These should be a good mix of romantic movies, comedies, and interesting documentaries. You never know what kind of mood the two of you will be in when you arrive at your place, and it's good to have a variety to choose from. Another good idea is to be constantly DVRing interesting things on TV. This allows you to always have something of value to throw on. An absolute great addition to your living room is Nintendo WII. This is a video game system that women finally seem to enjoy as much, if not more, than men. It's great because it can introduce some competitive flirting and offers a dynamic opportunity for Kino. This should all be a great guideline for you to transform your place into an excellent bachelor bad. Remember that the main purpose of your place is to have you and her feel comfortable and to provide some entertainment for the two of you.


Social Superstar

Day 23 Quick Lesson in Kino
Written by The Dicknotist Originally Published: 07/14/2008

If you’re reading this, you’re probably looking for ways to obtain more sex in your life. Perhaps you want something more than just sex …or perhaps not. Either way, what separates true sex from porn is that the former involves touch whereas the latter is viewed through the pixels of a computer screen. Sex cannot happen without contact and neither can seduction. Too many guys make the mistake of focusing all their efforts on conversation and while your words may peak her interest, your touch is what will drive her wild with intense desire. From the moment a woman lays eyes on you, she’s unconsciously wondering how you’ll be in bed. Will you take charge as she surrenders her body to you or will you look to her on what to do? Will you be affectionate and attentive to her needs or will you just slam it in a few times and leave? Do you actually know what you’re doing in the bedroom or will she have to teach you like all the other guys? All of that is conveyed through your eye contact and touch. We’ve all read the now famous DiCarlo Escalation Ladder (DEL), which will give you the nuts and bolts of what to do, but not necessarily the mindset behind it. Guys who aren’t used to touching women will just lay their hands on her as if they’re in a video game. They earn five points for every time they brush her arm or tap her back. When I touch a woman, I don’t play for points; I play for pleasure. When I think of touch, I imagine that my hands are like paintbrushes plastering my emotions onto her body. Call me the Jackson Pollack of seduction: I paint her arms her arms and torso now so that I can sprinkle some more on her face later…with my other special brush. So, when first talking to a girl, I will often just lightly touch her outer arms and torso with my fingers as I’m talking to her. I see it as expressive: you touch her as you talk to emphasize important points. That touch is more subtle and friendly, aimed at just making her comfortable and more trusting. During high points in the interaction, however, your touch should become more appreciative. Touch serves two purposes: to emphasize what you’re saying to her and to appreciate her. An example of appreciation could be that in talking to

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her, she reveals that she works as a nurse. That immediately peaks your interest as your mom was a nurse and you realize the resiliency and compassion necessary for the job. Rather than just telling her how awesome that is, you should also touch her arm and hold it there a few seconds longer than usual and perhaps even stroke it. Expressive touch is like a period: light and quick. Appreciative touch is like an exclamation point, lasting a good 2-3 seconds. Yet the point isn’t for you to have this in your head while talking to a woman but to give you a context for which touch can amplify and supercharge your game. When you touch her, touch her as if you’re already making love to her. Cup your hand as you touch her back and cup the back of her shoulder blades. Don’t forget her sensitive spots, including her inner arms, behind her knees, the skin fold on the other side of her elbow. Later on in the interaction, touching her neck, ears, thighs, breasts will amplify her desire. Don’t be afraid to graze her breasts! Graze them now so you can glaze them later. You can get away with murder in the field as long as you are relaxed and slow down. Calibration is simply the act of doing things much more slowly, which includes walking, talking, and touching. You may be nervous, but if you can slow down your actions, you will be seen as confident and in control. Of course, touch is best demonstrated by viewing and trying it yourself. An excellent resource on touch is The Joy of Erotic Massage, which takes you through more than you’ll ever need to give women incredible pleasure with your touch from the first meet to sex. You can purchase a copy on Amazon, though you’ll probably be able to get it free through other means… I hope that when you read this essay and even see the video above, you will get some fresh ideas on how to use touch to build trust and sexual tension. Yet, to get the most out of any endeavor, you must go out and hit the field. Experiment and develop your own style. Innovation never comes from passively reading and watching. Like any man of character, you must act.


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Day 24 Body Language 202
Written by Dr. Fuji Originally Published: 07/15/2008

Body language is one of the most underrated, overlooked, and powerful elements in your social arsenal. The classic study on the elements of communication by Professor Albert Mehrabian (1971, “Silent Messages” Wadsworth, Belmont, California) found that nonverbal communication accounts for as much as 93% of all communication. Body language itself makes up more than half of that. So it should come as no surprise that what you say isn’t near as important as how and when you say it. In cold approach pick up, the individual who uses body language effectively often has significantly better results than his less-enlightened counterparts. In this article we’ll be delving into the use of body language to convey high value, how to show interest or disinterest non-verbally, and fixing common sticking points and pitfalls. Let’s begin. An interesting thing about body language is that it tends to override your verbal. In other words, people will believe your nonverbal communication more than even what you actually say. So if your verbally sub communicate high value but your non-verbal says the opposite, people will tend to trust the body language over the words. While seemingly counter-intuitive, the fact is most people tend to place more trust in forms of communication that are harder to consciously alter. We can lie with our words quite easily. Lying with our body language is much more difficult. Because your body language is so incredibly consistent, women especially have found that it’s generally a very effective way to evaluate others. And therein lays both the problem and the effectiveness of body language. It’s very difficult to change, but when you are successful, it conveys much more influence than other forms of communication. One of the most effective uses for body language is communicating value. We do this by consciously altering our behaviors and mannerisms from unattractive to attractive. Imagine two men, both of equal confidence, looks, attractiveness, and other factors. But one man makes eye contact when he speaks and the other looks away and fails to make eye contact. Who is more attractive? The objective is to sub363

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communicate through our body language that we are “high-value” (read: attractive) men. By “high-value,” we mean that we have high quantities of the social and evolutionary value to which people respond. A “highvalue” man is one who encompasses all of the qualities and mannerisms that women are hard-wired to find attractive. Think: confidence, leadership ability, power, attractiveness to other women, strength, internally validated, etc. There are three main body positions in most social situations which you can use to convey value: How you stand, how you walk/move, and how you sit. Although full body language overhauls are beyond the scope of this article, the fundamentals are quite simple. When you’re standing, you want to stand with your feet shoulder-width apart or slightly wider, shoulders pulled back, standing up straight, and chest somewhat out. Your weight should generally be towards the rear of your soles (closer to the heel) so that you always appear to be leaning back. It should not be an uncomfortable stance, but one which clearly does not lend itself to laziness. Picture the way a U.S. Marine would stand when at ease. Your stance should project confidence. Your hands should drape at your sides the way they naturally fall. Do not put your hands in your pockets or cross them over your chest. When you walk or move, the object is to convey dominance and purpose. Your hands should swing naturally at your sides while you walk but without looking either stiff or “floppy.” Practice this in the mirror if you suspect they are moving unnaturally. Walk at about 50% of your normal speed when in the venue. When you are moving towards something (a set, an exit, the bathrooms, etc), take the shortest route possible—usually a straight line. Instead of circling a set several times like a vulture, walk straight up with confidence. Similarly, when moving through the crowd, you want to project dominance. Oftentimes women notice you and the way you move or interact with people and they make judgments about you before you’ve even noticed them. Dominance is tough to put in text but it’s something we drill in our live boot camps. The objective is to be verbally polite while “guiding” people out of your way. Don’t be afraid to touch both men and women while you’re walking through a crowd. A hand gently on the triceps or back letting people know you’re coming through is a dominant, yet polite way of moving through the crowd and communicating that you expect people to move out of your way.


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When you sit, the objective is to take up space while appearing relaxed and comfortable. Don’t overdo ‘taking up space’ lest you come off as tryhard. What you want to communicate is that you do not make any apologies for your existence and that you are used to always being comfortable. It’s the same concept as locking in. Useful tactics to convey this include draping your arms over the backs of chairs or over the seatbacks of booths or couches. Your upper body should ideally be leaning back without hunching over. Feet and legs can be spread moderately or crossed ankle-to-knee. Sliding forward slightly in your seat will allow you to lean back even in a vertically-backed chair. The main communication here is that you are comfortable and confident. Do not cross your arms over your chest for this reason. The other thing that body language is extremely useful for is showing interest or disinterest nonverbally. Because women are so much better attuned to body language relative to men, they feel your nonverbal indicators of interest (IOIs) or disinterest (IODs) much more powerfully than we do as men. For example, facing a set or group is one way to nonverbally show interest. Conversely, facing away is a subtle show of disinterest. Other body language-based indicators of interest include: Leaning in, Kino escalation (escalating physical touch), strong eye contact, and cocking your head to the side. Indicators of disinterest include: leaning back, putting barriers between you and the set or group (especially in front of your midsection, e.g. arms crossed, drink in front of the chest, etc), not smiling, “body rocking”, and looking away. Note that some of these things can also be considered demonstrations of lower value so be cognizant of what you are communicating to people. The power in nonverbal IOIs and IODs are that they can be used both subtly and oftentimes with more impact than their verbal counterparts. For example, a nonverbal false time constraint (an IOD) is much more powerful than a verbal-only version. As we’ve discussed earlier, people tend to place more credibility on body language than verbal communication because of the difficulty involved in controlling it. The punishment-reward sub-dynamic is the underlying principle behind Mehow’s Chase Cycling™ model and is most effective when body language is used to both reward good behavior and punish bad behavior. A great example of this is during the first minute of the interaction. Sets generally don’t face you right off the opener. They’re usually facing each

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other. When you begin to hook the set, you can tell by their body language – they start to turn toward you. You can then nonverbally reward by more directly facing them or giving emotional value. If they give you IODs, you can punish by facing away and throwing a false time constraint (a verbal IOD). This psychologically conditions women to invest and to work for you. And as we all know, we value that which we work for. Finally, there are certain body language mistakes that the majority of guys find themselves making during their training. By being aware of these common sticking points, you’ll be better equipped to stop them before they become bad habits. Let’s examine a few of the most common: Leaning In: This is one of the most common sticking points most guys make. Leaning in is an instinctive body language move that you have to consciously change. The lower the set is (seated, lying down, shorter than you, etc.), the more you’ll feel the urge to lean in. Don’t do it. Have a wing observe you in set and let you know when you’re leaning in. Rewarding bad behavior: Directly and continually facing a set which is closed off and giving you IODs is rapport and acceptance-seeking. You are non-verbally rewarding the set for defiance. Instead, mirror a set’s body language IODs with your own. Take advantage of both false time constraints and body rocking to avoid continually facing a set that isn’t hooking. Lacking dominance: Everything you do in field should be done with confidence and dominance. From the initial approach, to Kino escalation, to simply walking through the crowd, your body language is communicating things about you. Dominant body language communicates confidence, pre-selection, and social proof. Fidgeting: Nervous ticks such as swaying from side to side, playing with your hands or fingers, moving around too much, or playing with your drink all tell the set and everyone around you that you are not only nervous around them, but that they are higher value and thus, you are emotionally reacting to them. The emotion of nervousness often manifests itself through these nervous behaviors. Eliminate them. You’ll notice a marked improvement in your interactions. Drink shield: This is another common sticking point the majority of men have. The “drink shield” is when people hold their drink in front of their chest in a social environment. The sub communication behind this body language tick is that you’re nervous and uneasy. So your instinctive reaction is to cover your midsection (traditionally the most vulnerable

We cover body language much more in depth in our live programs and boot camps and also in Mehow’s esteemed Get the Girl!™ Manual available at www. but these are the absolute most common ones. The human brain is constantly reacting to stimuli from the sensory system. Fix these behaviors and you’ll see a significant improvement in your game and in your own state. And of course. but after some practice. security. let them hang naturally by your sides.mehowgetthegirl. You don’t know what to do with your hands so you shove them in your pockets. One interesting side effect of good body language is that it not only affects your interactions but your psychology as well. we’ve examined some of the most common sticking points and come up with solutions and fixes to remedy them. and relaxation with your body language. there’s dozens more sticking points many guys will experience. Just as your mind affects the See you all in the field. And it’s the basis behind parents telling their children not to cross their arms or frown. Hands in pockets: This behavior also communicates that you’re nervous and that you feel awkward. Instead. Of course. but to also convey interest or disinterest without opening our We’ve learned that not only does it allow us to show value. and body language is no exception. hold your drink down by your hip and don’t cross your arms or take a protective stance. Force yourself to relax and let your arms just fall. Instead. This is why faking a smile for an extended period of time often makes us feel better on the inside as well. Your physiology often has a significant effect on your psychology.mehow. You are trying to convey abundance. At the beginning you’ll have to force this.Social Superstar spot on most mammals) with some sort of protection. Information on our live programs can be found at www. Hopefully this article has been able to shed some light on the importance of body language as a whole. your body too affects the mind. you’ll start to automatically relax more in social situations. DJ Fuji Chief Instructor 367 . In this case it’s the drink.

Live life through their eyes. If you want to stand out in a crowd. while we were getting stuck in the friend zone. Most people are insecure. Even if some of their reckless behavior will never suit your personality. It will come across forced and insincere.” Well boys. So instead of trying to learn from these “jerks” whom we weren’t alpha enough to hang with. The reason most of us viewed these guys as assholes or jerks is simply because we were jealous and envious that these guys were always dating the girls that we wanted. In fact. we found it easier to blame society for our lack of success with women. it’s time to MAN up! There is plenty that can be learned from these bad boys. it is simply because that is the vibe that you’ve been sending off. Instead. We are held back by our fear of losing our job. You’re fearless. Feel the fear. You want to shed your “nice guy” image? It is impossible to try to imitate specific bad boy behavior. you’ve probably often asked yourself “why all girls like the assholes?” or “How come the jerks get all the girls?” This is not so say that being a bad boy makes you an asshole or a jerk. The Bad Boy trait you should emulate 1. Most fear stems from our need for approval. then do it anyway. that girls are attracted to guys who possess a bit of that bad boy persona. Most of our fears are completely unwarranted. you can try adopting some of their character traits to increase your attractiveness. “women only like the assholes. our fear of going 368 . live a fearless existence. put yourself in their mindset.COM Day 25 Being the Bad Boy Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/16/2008 You probably noticed as far back as grade school. Most people are held back by various forms of fear. If you’ve found yourself too often getting stuck in the friend zone. and create an acceptable excuse for ourselves.The Best of TSBMAG. Most people suffer some form of anxiety disorder. if you’re like most us. our fear of being laughed at.

In the average guy. Do you want to call out of work and go the beach? Do it! Do you want to tell the counter girl at the bank that she’s sexy as hell? Do it! Do you want to finally change the style of your haircut? Jump out a plane? Get a tattoo? Have sex with a stranger? Do whatever the fuck you want! Whenever the fuck you want! Do this for just 2 days and experience the thrill of being fearless. lonely or in a shitty relationship. This is why the average guy becomes her friend. or how you appear. 369 . say what you feel like saying. The bad boy makes her forget all about her fears and insecurities. What would your personality be like if you weren’t governed by all of these fears? If you take a look at the short list of our major fears… you’ll find that not one of them is life threatening. He takes her into his fearless existence. tell someone who has pissed you off to “fuck off. My challenge to you Live the next two days of your life completely fearless. and we’re not even afraid of the consequences of the wrong decision… We are afraid of what people will say about us… what people will think about us.” do exactly what you want to do. In fact. most of our major fears are solely based on what thoughts someone else will have about us. a woman sees a reflection of most of her fears and insecurities. After the two days you can go back to worrying about what people think. our fear of making a mistake. Because they can sit and talk and wallow in their fears and insecurities together. How refreshing is it when we meet someone who isn’t controlled by these fears? Women are attracted to bad boys. And she gets addicted to it. have given up our dreams… because we are afraid of making the wrong decision. Most of us are working a job we hate.Social Superstar broke. approach who you feel like approaching. or whatever other insignificant. our fear of ruining our reputation. our fear of rejection. trivial reason is holding you back. Just for the next two days. How ridiculous does that sound when you really think about it? 90% of the decisions that you make are influenced by your need for approval. because bad boys provide an adrenaline rush that the average guy does not.

We even went into specific 370 .” If you feel that you need to incorporate more bad boy traits into your persona I highly recommend listening to our How to Be the Bad Boy Women Want podcast.tsbmag.COM More information on being the bad boy In our most recent podcast we went over an entire list of ways you can take on more of the bad boy attitude. showing how a bad boy would react as opposed to the typical “nice guy. http://www.The Best of TSBMAG.

This is a fine line that you have to be careful as you walk. the longer this process should go on. but brief and vague. texts. While you’re gone you also need to arouse some jealously on her part. and communicate often through phone. She can never feel like you’re bragging. Although you will be vague. This is to be done without making her feel like you’re mad at her.Social Superstar Day 26 How to Turn a Female Friend into Your Girlfriend (Part 1) Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/18/2008 For the sake of this lesson I am going to make a couple assumptions. you should always be implying that really great things are going on in your life. or lying… The whole attitude should be that really great things are going on in your life… but you’re holding back from telling her because you don’t want to make her feel bad. When you do talk to her be pleasant. This means cut off phone calls. text or email immediately. The whole goal is to make her wonder what is going on in your life that you no longer have time for her. Vagueness is the key to this part. What you are doing here is confusing her. First. Bobby’s Step by Step Plan The first thing that you need to do is effectively disappear from your friend’s life. and the confusion will cause her to spend more time thinking about you. This means you spend a reasonable amount of time with her. Wait a day or two before getting back to her. When she contacts you… don’t answer the phone call. trying to make her jealous. emails. and visits. Her simply missing you will not be enough to stir up immense attraction for you. A great way to do this is to call her and ask her to hang out. Assuming enough time has 371 . I am going to assume that the female friend you’re interested in has firmly placed you in the friend zone. Now you need to amplify the jealousy and confusion. You should spend at least one month apart. The better friends you are with this girl. I will also assume that you are actually friends with her and not just an acquaintance. text messages. or MySpace/Facebook.

add some new cool pictures (preferably with some hot girls. The other benefit of improving your social skills will be that it will naturally make you more attractive to your friend. Many times guys fall for their female friend because she is the only girl in their life. now is the time to get serious about change. cancel the plans with her. In the meantime.COM gone. During your time away from her you also need to be working on your social skills. You need to be filling your days with the most exciting. Improving your social skills serves many purposes. be vague. do everything you possibly can to get to your ideal weight. flirting. Once these guys go out and meet some new girls they realize that there is an abundance of women and no longer cling to this one girl the way they used to. Assuming that the both of you are active on at least one social networking site like MySpace or Facebook.. If there are physical areas of you that need improvement. You should be doing everything you can to take your mind off of her.. If you’re over weight. Above everything else. challenging. You should be hitting on other girls with reckless abandon. and building attraction with as many girls as you can. Once again. It is important that you change up your profile a bit. Basically you want to do everything I outlined in day 3 about updating your look. Your 372 . that when she finally sees you again there is a very noticeable improvement in your appearance. another great way to create jealousy is to take advantage of social networking sites. Race and Kelly give a great way to go about getting these comments.) To go even further I would recommend getting a bunch of attractive girls to leave comments on your page. You should be out talking. it gives you a chance to see if you really want this girl to be your girlfriend. The entire time that you’re away from her you need to be working on yourself. you can bet she will be checking out your profile to see what’s going on in your life. she will be relieved that you finally called… and her jealousy and confusion will dwindle… Just when she thinks things are going back to the status quo. The confidence you will gain through your improvements will radiate throughout you. If you’re scrawny… join a gym and follow a good plan for bulking up. You should not spend all of your time away from her thinking about her and planning your next move. It is crucial that after her long time away from you. When you cancel don’t schedule a new date. and personally rewarding events imaginable.The Best of TSBMAG.

or holding her hand. This is the end of today’s lesson. haircut. The idea of lying in bed with her. As much as I wanted it. Experience the feeling of sitting next to her having moved past the friend zone. it is much more powerful if it's because you really do have better plans and more options. or wardrobe. you need to spend fifteen minutes visualizing yourself with your friend as lovers. there is one exception to that. Every morning upon waking and every evening before you go to bed. The final thing you need to be doing relates strongly to lesson 1 which dealt with designing your life. If you want to learn more about visualizations re-read lesson one. as I truly believed it is what finally allowed me to turn a friend of five years into a lover a couple years back. This final exercise is so important because you have to train your brain to experience the new reality. I found the biggest factor that used to hold me back from making a move on my friend was that I could not imagine the outcome. and go for the kiss. or just referring to her as my girlfriend was so foreign to me that it scared me senseless. You will also be fine tuning your flirting skills which you will need later on when you start hanging out with your friend again. I swear by this. Part two will deal with how you will act when you finally meet up with your friend again. how you will break rapport. I followed the entire plan outlined above. I don’t mean visualize the act of sex… I want you to visualize what it will be like after your first kiss. amplify attraction. Hold the vision in your mind and feel all of the feelings associated with it. While I’ve stressed that during your time away from your friend you should put her out of your mind as much as possible. The final benefit of improving your social skills immensely while you’re away from your female friend is because you’ll find it so much easier to create the confusion and jealousy that you’re aiming for. my brain resisted out of fear. 373 .Social Superstar new found confidence will probably impress her more than your new body. This will come into play in part two when I discuss finally meeting up with her again. and then supplemented it with the visualizations… and I truly believe that without the visualizations I would not have been able to succeed with the plan. If you’re avoiding her phone calls and breaking plans with her.

If you haven’t brought girls with you. The goal of this first meeting is to display the “new” you in action. During this evening you should be bouncing back and forth between your friend and the other girls in the location.COM Day 27 How to Get Your Female Friend into Bed Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/21/2008 If you are serious and strict about following the plan I laid out in part one of turning a friend into a lover then you will have built up an ample amount of tension and anticipation. When your friend finally arrives you should be talking to some girls. Hopefully you’ll have invited some other girls you know as well. This means inviting her to a party you’re hosting or a night out with you and your friends. then you need to be an opening machine. You can easily ruin everything you’ve been working for by losing control of yourself and saying or doing the wrong thing. Once you get to the location you need to establish yourself as the social charming guy of the evening. When your female friend arrives it is critical that you’re already engaged in some conversation with attractive women. club. I would maintain nothing more than a good buzz throughout the night.The Best of TSBMAG. Once you’ve established a meeting point (bar. When you finally decide to hang out with your friend again you need to invite her to an event that is on your terms. party) you need to arrive there early. For the short intervals that you spend with your friend the conversation should only consist of light and flirtatious talk. It is important that you spend this time building sexual tension through teasing her and using Kino. but do not immediately run to her side. I don’t care if you have to open every set in the bar… find one that sticks. It is critical that you immediately capitalize on this built up tension. Let her feel a little awkward and uncomfortable for awhile. Let's talk about how to capitalize on this built up anticipation. If not. You are to acknowledge her. It is extremely easy to slip back into the status quo if you drop your guard. 374 . How many times has she done that to you? I just want to add something in: Do not get too drunk. you need to begin making new friends immediately.

but I’ll say it anyway… never verbally acknowledge any of this. This is something that you’re going to have to feel out. as the tension is mounting. She will be feeling attraction towards you. These things are things that lovers do.Social Superstar The time that you spend with her you need to be quickly escalating the Kino. tell her you going to get a drink and go talk to another girl.. put your arm around her. If she starts talking about some guy she’s dating-change the subject at the first chance you get. If you’re going to go for it all you need to be rapidly escalating Kino. touch her hair (likewise. the best way to break rapport is with physical contact. As the night gets later you have to make a decision. and friends don’t. Sexual escalation is more effective because it is less ambiguous: hold her hand (use an excuse of looking at her rings or bracelets or nails if you need to). Some girls may not be game for making out in the club… in this case you need to find away to get her alone. Or better yet. 375 . This means tease her with a gentle push. Remember. your goal isn’t to offend your friend or be mean… your goal is to build attraction. Personally. or if you’re going to end the night leaving her wanting more.. If you’ve followed everything correctly you should have built up some strong attraction. Her emotions are going to be peaked by mid way through the night. Everything should be happening without mention of the paradigm shift. Later in the night. You also need to be sure to break rapport. or grab her hand to look at her ring. I’ve found it is almost always most effective to swing for the fences the first night. Now it's just a matter of letting her know it's alright to embrace this attraction. This should go without saying. You need to take control of the frame and subtly let her know that you’re calling the shots now. use an excuse). or touch her ear to comment on her earring. You’ll need to use a combination of these touches to shift out of the friend zone. She will most likely try to suck you into talking about the same old status quo topics the two of you always discussed. You have to decide if you’re going to shoot for the fences with your friend. If she starts talking about something that is not cooperating with the mood… break rapport again. Once you’re alone with her you have to be sure to keep the sexual tension alive.

tease. smile. and build attraction.. You should slow down your speech and deepen your voice.COM It won’t be enough to just tease her and escalate Kino.. initiate Kino. But if possible. This evening you must treat the same way as the previous evening. You have to encourage her to have sexual thoughts about you. then close out the evening talking to other girls and part ways with your friend. Go in for the kiss. Give it one more chance. You need to prompt these thoughts by: • • • • You need to hold strong eye contact. Look at her lips and leave pauses where you just look at each other. arrange for some friends to send periodic text messages to peak her interest. flirt. If you sense you need to build more attraction. The next time you hang out with her it can be alone.The Best of TSBMAG. Simply look at the texts. If you’ve decided to hold off to another night to go for the kiss… I suggest making a deal with yourself. You should look at her like you want her. You need to break rapport.. If she’s comfortable with that or looks at you in a seductive fashion it's on. 376 . then put your phone back in your pocket. If you find she is being completely unreceptive to your advances… then let the evening die down with you in control. You need to act in a seductive manner.. If you find at the end of this second night that she still isn’t receptive to being kissed… move on.

MLTR. You only have a set amount of time. Chase Originally Published: 07/22/2008 I’m guessing since I’m getting married in September (let’s see how that goes) is why I was asked to write about managing a relationship for the 31 days series. I am not a guru. or just a fuck buddy hopefully you can pick something up from this. It’s a mind-blowing experience to watch how some guys get treated in public…and they put up with it. Here we go… Let’s be blunt here…when women get complacent in a relationship they tend to treat their guy like shit. If you are interested in a relationship. Should put a little perspective on the divorce rate in this country. One of my good friends got married a while back. there it is and good luck changing it. but the stuff below is golden. It’s not that it can’t be fixed. If you decide one day you’re going to break the mold with a girl you’ve been seeing the vase cracks…yeah. 377 .Social Superstar Day 28 Managing a Relationship Written by M. these are just guidelines I’ve been taught and implemented that have worked wonders. most of these are Sebastian Drake’s concepts. Apologies in advance for the long post. If you think I’m joking head to the mall on a Saturday afternoon. buy a drink. be it monogamous. Honeymoon was great. The Vase Concept This is the best analogy I’ve heard…relationships are like a vase…clay and water getting molded together on a wheel. The marriage lasted six months until he finally flipped. I’m not reinventing the wheel here. maybe two months to make things how you want them to be. Guys. He was GIVEN a $20 allowance per week with the money he earned. good luck with that. Then she quit her job and took over the finances. these are not my ideas. while sad this can be prevented. We’re all creatures of habit. Here’s a true story. everything was normal. then sit down and watch couples interact. it just takes a hell of a lot of time to do it (and this goes double for friends or ex-girlfriends who already know you). Once the vase gets thrown into the oven and hardened. To give credit so I don’t step on any toes or get a lawsuit thrown at me.

Getting someone to admit to something you want wins the battle…if they renege on it later you can bust them on it. Ashlyn just moved into my place and did some redecorating. This is just psych 101. If this will piss you off a couple of months from now don’t start the cycle. If she disagrees on a trait you’re looking for it’s up to you if you want to pursue it. people act like they are expected to. Gentleman. If she asks you to do something. singing karaoke. I’m surprised this isn’t addressed more in the community. For example.The Best of TSBMAG.” You can use a variation of this for any trait you’re looking for. This is also very good for compliance.COM Precedence is absolutely key. Never. We all get caught up in the moment when we’re with a new girl we like. if I’m into a woman and looking for a MLTR. and this can be anything you seriously don’t want to do (going to plays. Can’t say I’m exactly thrilled with the changes (I’m now a plant owner) but it’s something I can live with. Set Expectations Guys. Again. doing the laundry…whatever). DO NOT do it from day one. Let me ask a question. This is very powerful in the seduction phase. The moment you get fed up the precedent has been broken and the vase cracks. You simply have to. If she’s into you she’ll agree with pretty much anything you say unless it’s way out of her personality. Don’t get the wrong impression that you should never compromise. People tend to live up to what they’ve admitted to. This was so far out of my reality I thought it was a joke…it 378 . The real question is what you’re willing to compromise on. good luck with that. I’ll drop something like “look at all the women in this place that need a man to hold their hand…please tell me you’re not like that. You can’t exactly change someone’s personality. even if I have to water the damn things. Frankly. but you can nudge them in certain directions. Would you drop an f-bomb in front of your grandmother? I know I wouldn’t have. Everyone acts differently around different people. Do you act the same way around your best friend that you would around your boss? Now what you should ask yourself is why? The same thing goes for relationships. draw the battlelines. Draw the Battle-Lines Probably the best advice I’ve ever gotten. Something in our heads wants to make her happy and seek approval. fancy dinners.

something along the lines of “can we just have sex tonight instead of you doing me anal on the balcony”…fucking hilarious. sex 4 times a week…etc. I’m trying to remember how this went. bj every day. If anything I hope you guys got something out of this. We all do it. Whatever you really want. In the seduction context make a list of what will make you happy in a relationship. A loyal girl. When women get pissed they will push you to see what they can get away with. Chase II 379 . Now push it forward. M.Social Superstar wasn’t. If you set your expectations farther than what you really need you’ll always be in the clear when problems come up that have to be worked out.

The Best of TSBMAG. But even after some powerful foreplay you need to follow up an even more powerful lay. If you know you’ve got a habit of finishing quickly than make sure you extend the foreplay. If she’s an aggressive and dominant kisser… sit back and follow her lead. slow your style down so your tongues mesh together. In this lesson I want to give you guys some tips for improving this area of your life. simply because you mirrored her style. Most girls really enjoy receiving oral sex… learn to read the signs she is giving you and get her pussy gushing from the oral. She’ll walk away thinking you were the best kisser in the world. You need to make her feel like you know her inside and out. It doesn’t matter how great of a pick-up artist you are. Above all this is the number one trait of a good lover. That is true sexual power. she has to feel an intense sexual connection with you. Increase your stamina and last longer by focusing on 380 . You’ll need to increase your stamina. You need to be able to recognize what a woman is enjoying.. If you want a mind blowing sexual session it has to last more than ten minutes..COM Day 29 Tips for Getting Better in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/21/2008 If you want to have the ability to call a girl up every night of the week for a late night booty call. if you don’t perform in the bedroom you will never be able to create a life of unlimited options. Sexual options with women stems from building up a network of women who love having sex with you. You need to tailor everything to the girl you’re having sex with at this particular moment. I recently wrote a post about becoming a better lover where I discussed the art of reading the signs that a woman is giving you and continuing to push her in that direction. Use your hands and mouth to create intense sexual tension. you need to be good in bed. This starts with the kiss. Women who still want to sleep with you even after they realize that you’re not boyfriend material. If she is a slow passionate kisser. Explore every area of her body until she is practically begging for it. Even if she knows you’re a player.

2. You also want to build up your energy level as well as increasing your testosterone level which will only fuel your fire in the bedroom. If you’re clueless about the G-spot read an article about how to find the g-spot 381 . More tips to be a better lover 1. Everything listed above are the fundamentals needed to become a better lover.Social Superstar pleasing her rather than how good you feel. 3. Give a good massage. The more you take care of your body the more likely she’ll be inclined to want to give you oral sex. 5. Smell Good. But having an idea of where it is and how to hit it will increase your likely hood of making her cum. Groom Yourself. Just a small spray is best… or go for that just out of the shower smell. Don’t obsess about the g-spot. Having stubble on your face can irritate her and make things like kissing and oral sex a lot less pleasurable for her. Having a little knowledge of some sexually erotic zones of a woman’s body will go a long way. Shave. Wearing nice smelling cologne can intensify the sexual desire she feels for you. Watch a video on giving an erotic hand massage or a video on giving a foot massage. use positions that you’re less likely to finish with. 4. and by practicing. Below I’ve listed some general tips to improve the overall experience. Aim for the G-spot. using breathing patterns.

I used to hate when a girl asked me one of these questions. And what I hated more. Now that you’re out meeting and dating a variety of girls you’ll quickly find that you won’t be on the same page as most of them. But there is one constant rule that does not change. 382 . the girl would throw it in my face how I should have just been honest with her back when she asked “where this was going. Eventually you are bound to hear one of these 3 evil questions: 1. The irony of this is that you will probably find it is more difficult to end it with a girl than it was to get her. It is never easy to end things with a girl… and every situation will be different.” Well. I used to fear it. the harder it will be. Where do we stand? 2. Where is this going? If you’ve been dating a girl that you have no intention of making your girlfriend… than you need to change the way you view these 3 questions. now I’ve learned to love when a girl asks me one those questions… because I’ve learned to just be honest with her. I hated the way I had to lie or change topics or be extremely vague with my answer.COM Day 30 Ending a Fling or Relationship Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/23/2008 There comes a time in every player’s life where he is forced to end relations with a female he no longer enjoys spending time with. when I finally had the balls to end it. The longer you wait to end it.The Best of TSBMAG. and pray that things will roll along at the status quo. This is because while you may view her as “practice” or “fun for the moment” or “somewhere to dump your load” she may have completely other thoughts running through her mind in regards to what the two of you have together. What is this? 3. was when months later.

and you have to be the one to address the situation. Tell her why. In that case she doesn’t give you an out..Social Superstar When a girl doesn’t ask “what is this” and lets thing go along like everything is fine… that is when it is exceptionally hard to end it. She can’t have those two years back. The longer you date a girl you have no real feelings for the more resentment will grow inside of you. Many guys will continue dating a girl they have no feelings for simply because they are scared to be single or unable to give up the steady sex. You will 383 . tell her. There is an abundance of women available. Ultimately it is all about living with integrity. This is not the mentality that a true player should have. I wrote a post awhile back called Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along where I talked about the negative effect stringing a girl along has on your personality. This is why you should use the opportunity most girls will present you with and come clean and be honest with them. The secret to ending a relationship is honesty. this will actually allow her to move on and get over you. The more you try to sugar coat a break up the less likely she will feel the break up is for real. But you’ll find that if you continually are honest with yourself and others your life will be a lot less complicated. The right decision may not always be the easiest. I know that sounds mean. it will be a lot harder to make the transition. In yesterday’s lesson I talked about how if you’re really good in the bedroom you can usually keep sleeping with girls long after they’ve realized that you’re not going to be their boyfriend. If a girl asks you “where this is headed” and you don’t see it turning into a long term relationship. The minute you free yourself up from one girl. If you let her know this after a few weeks than it is more likely she will keep you on the side as a booty call. If you lead a girl on for six months and then tell her that you don’t have feelings for her other than sexual. But it is a lot meaner to let a girl waste two years hoping that you’ll finally see the light and be what she wanted. As hard as it may seem to tell a girl you don’t love her or don’t want a relationship with her. That resentment is unhealthy for your soul. If she doesn’t feel it's for real than she will be filled with hope that you will get back together. She will respect you for your honesty.. You need to crush that hope. But this needs to be established as soon as possible. This is a lot harder than it seems. you’ll be amazed at how quickly more will flow into your life.

COM also find that you feel better about yourself. and your sense of self worth will increase. 384 .The Best of TSBMAG.

A SWOT analysis is a strategic tool that has been used for many years in business (and many other fields) to look at the Strengths. Weaknesses. Much has been written about SWOT analysis and how to carry it out (I’ll let you do some searches on Google for it if you’re not familiar with it) however let me write a brief description of how to apply it to yourself. As a result you’ll want to have done Day 1’s task . relationships? What resources and assets do you have at your disposal? What do you do better than anyone else? 3. Your task today is to run a SWOT Analysis on yourself. Define Your Mission and Goals Before you carry out your SWOT it’s important that you know what your goals are (otherwise the exercise is a little pointless as you’ve got nothing to review yourself based upon). List Your Opportunities Where is opportunity presenting itself? Is there a local club/group that you can join? Is there a girl just dying for you to make your move? Did an old fling show up back in your life? Did a new girl move in the 385 . pua. List Your Weaknesses What attributes do you have that are holding you back from achieving your goals? What skills do you not have as a successful player. Opportunities and Threats that that business might have or be facing. 2. 1. List Your Strengths What attributes do you have that will help you to achieve your goals? What do you have going for you? What are your strong points with approaching. dating. or alpha male? What is ‘broken’ on your game? What could or should you improve about yourself? What should you probably avoid in your gaming? What is distracting you from your goals? 4.Social Superstar Day 31 Run a SWOT Analysis on Your Self Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/25/2008 Today is the last day in the 31 Days to Better Game series and as a result I want to make your last task a little reflective and forward looking.Designing Your Life.

Opportunities and Threats is only half the job. Weaknesses. 6.Think of Strengths and Weaknesses as internal factors while Opportunities and Threats are external factors. Doing a SWOT analysis is something that I do periodically on myself. List Your Threats What external things could or area is hindering you achieving your goals? Are you working too much and therefore coming home too tired to game? Do you not have enough money to go out to bars or clubs very often? Note . Have you ever done one on yourself? 386 .COM apartment across the hall? A part time job you should get to meet new people? 5.The Best of TSBMAG. How can you utilize your Strengths? How can you bring your Weaknesses to an end? How can you make the most of your Opportunities? How can you fend off the Threats? An old Marketing lecturer used to say .‘doing the analysis of Strengths. Working out how to turn Weaknesses into Strengths and Threats into Opportunities is the key part of a SWOT analyses. Plan to Do Something and Do It Translate your findings into an Action Plan and begin to implement it. this website and on my overarching business also. 7. Analyze Your Reflections and Generate Strategies Take some time out to work out what you can do with your findings.

http://www.tsbmag.Social Superstar The Index Other things that have helped make TSB Magazine grow: Our Famous podcasts We have produced many podcasts that have totaled over 100. For those of you who have never had the experience of playing the game. confidence Booty Call Game For those who loved the old Romp. http://www. and sex. relationships. online dating. 387 . and funny Our Video Library We created a video library and filled it with the best of dating advice. they were happy to find that it relocated to TSB Magazine. live pickups.tsbmag. you absolutely must give it a shot. The topics varied from Booty Call flash game.000 in downloads. You can download all of our podcasts by visiting the link below. We've also had the opportunity to interview many of the top dating coaches.

And forever a friend to Bobby. and Pete. Very Special Thanks We would like to issue a special thanks and acknowledgement to long time reader Morgan Chase. You are an honorary inductee into the TSB Magazine Hall of Fame.COM Acknowledgements We would like to take the time to thank all of our loyal readers who have stuck by us over the years. 388 . and to provide invaluable suggestions. We want you to know that we truly appreciate your support and encouragement and look forward to continuing to provide you with high quality content. You have been there to keep us on track. and your effort and contribution do not go unnoticed. We want to thank you for all the support you've shown us. Many of the long time readers of TSB remember him for his frequent commenting and patrol of the chat box. as you have gone above and beyond.The Best of TSBMAG. Mike.

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