Social Superstar

First Published in Paperback 2008 By Sumi Books
Text Copyright: Anthony Almeida 2008 The moral right of the author has been asserted. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission in writing of the publisher, except by a reviewer who wishes to quote brief passages in connection with a review written for insertion in a newspaper, magazine, or broadcast. A catalogue record is for this book is available from the US Library Design and Typeset by Jeffrey Posner Printed and bound by Lulu Cover picture used with permission from the author. ISBN: Every reasonable effort has been made to acknowledge the ownership of copyright material included in this book. Any errors that have inadvertently occurred will be corrected in subsequent editions provided notification is sent to the publisher. Walden Books NY8, NY

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The Best of TSBMAG.COM

SOCIAL SUPERSTAR: Best of TSB Magazine Vol. 1 Table of Contents
Introduction Part 1: The Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript Part 2: The Best of TSB Magazine Section One: The Dating Articles 5 Keys to Playing the Role of Being Wanted 10 Lessons for Successfully Hooking Up Emulate a Celebrity for Instant Rapport Using an Opinion Opener to Initiate Conversation Being Comfortable Talking Dirty 10 Ways a Girl Can Keep a Guy Like Me Keeping Cool and Plowing On How to Talk to Younger Women Going Caveman on Women Never Show Emotion When She Walks Away 5 Tips for Lasting Longer in Bed How to Get Better in Bed Having Trouble Getting Hard Wimps into Winners Ultimate MySpace Jealousy Tool Aim Lower PUA Openers, Openers, Openers How to Calm Your Sexual Neediness Are You the Man or Just the Fan? 107 109 113 115 118 120 123 125 127 129 131 133 135 140 145 146 147 150 151 9 106

Section Two: The Inner Game Articles The Hero, the Bounty, and the Purpose Driven Life
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Integrity Makes a Man The Great Gatsby Complex Build it, and They Will Come Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along The Anatomy of the Sickness Living with Passion 7 Secrets for Getting Out of a Slump Can You Control Your Emotions Like Arod Going Down in Flames Bust Through Your Comfort Zone

159 162 166 169 171 175 177 180 182 185

Section Three: Alpha Living Articles 10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive 3 Tips for Abs of Steel A Manly Guide to Choosing Your Drink 7 Steps to Naturally Boost Your Testosterone How to Naturally Increase Energy How to Redo Your Wardrobe Winning the Day 1 College Roommate Wars 187 191 194 197 199 203 213

Section Four: The Stories The Buenos Aires Hooker Juice Incident Fortaleza Nights (Part 1) Fortaleza Nights (Part 2) Ten Years After I Took Her Virginity My First Piece of MySpace Pussy The Return of a Pickup Artist (Part 2) 216 222 226 229 233 240
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The Best of TSBMAG.COM

Snowballed Hotel Room High The Early Days: Experimenting With Speed Seduction The Falling in Love Pattern Don’t Buy the Cheap Sex Toys The Drunken Night in Medellin Story

247 249 253 257 260 264

Section Five: 31 Days to Better Game Day 1: Designing Your Life Day 2: Developing Inner Game Day 3: Updating Your Look Day 4: Always be Advertising Day 5: Being High Status Day 6: How to be a Good Flirt Day 7: Approaching and Opening Women Day 8: Improving Conversation Skills Day 9: How to Build Comfort Day 10: Being Funnier… Day 11: Push Pull/Cocky Funny Day 12: Body Language 101 Day 13: Building Your Social Circle Day 14: How to Properly Tease a Woman Day 15: Creating a MySpace and Facebook Profile Day 16: Tips for Flirting Online Day 17: Phone Game Strategy Day 18: Text Game for the PUA Day 19: How to Go on First Dates Day 20: How to Get a Day Two
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270 273 276 278 280 285 290 292 296 302 304 313 317 318 324 334 338 343 347 350

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Day 21: Building Sexual Tension Day 22: Preparing Your Bachelor Pad Day 23: Quick Lesson in Kino Day 24: Body Language 202 Day 25: Being the Badboy Day 26: Friend into Lover (part 1) Day 27: Friend into Lover (part 2) Day 28: Managing a Relationship Day 29: Tips for Getting Better in Bed Day 30: Ending a Fling or Relationship Day 31: Perform a SWOT Analysis on Yourself Index

354 356 361 363 368 371 374 377 380 382 385 387

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The Best of TSBMAG.COM Dedicated to Morgan Chase II

Introduction
This book is five years in the making! Who was there for the red and black days? For those that just came on board recently, the red and black days refers to the early days of TSB when it had a blood red header with a black background and white text. And Mike and I thought the site looked hot. Putting this book together brought back many memories. I had to search through over 1,500 articles to choose the very best. The evolution of the site, in a way, represents the evolution of both the life of me, and the life of Michael Stoute. We wanted to make this book a diverse look at the four years leading up to its publication. Instead of focusing solely on dating articles, stories, or self help type articles, we chose to break the book up into six parts. These six parts are a great representation of TSB Magazine, as well as Bobby Rio and Michael Stoute- the men behind the magazine. Another reason we chose to break the book up into four parts is because we think you will get more value of it that way. There are articles in here that will help you with all aspects of your life. For instance, if you bought this book for the pickup advice, you might be pleasantly surprised in six months to read some articles about fitness, fashion, or inner game, you may have missed earlier when you ‘re were concentrating solely on devouring all things pickup. The six parts of this book are as follows: Part 1: The Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript This is our never before released manuscript for becoming a social superstar. This manuscript was first created over 10 years ago. Over the past 10 years it has been tested and refined. This contains everything you need to know to climb to the top of any social ladder. Part 2: The Best of TSB Magazine

The Essential Dating Articles
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Social Superstar

Going through our huge library of dating, pickup, relationship and sex articles, I found it tough to choose “the best” so I decided to choose articles that give you a well rounded approach to improving your dating life. Most of these articles came out Mike’s and my own personal experience of improving our dating life. It wasn’t a quick and easy ride for either one of us… we hope that these articles will make your ride a little less bumpy.

The Inner Game Articles
These are some of the articles that mean the most to me. Through the many phases I’ve gone through as a person during the five years we were creating this magazine… these articles resonate with every period. The topics transcend dating advice, as the entire core principles can be applied to any area of your life, and I am confident you’ll see a marked improvement. This section is also the most timeless… as long after the days you are married with children… I hope that you still pick up this section of the book and reread some of these articles and find inspiration from them.

The Alpha Living Articles
Like the Inner Game articles I chose to include these Alpha Living articles because they too, are timeless. These are articles that you can read when you’re a sixty year old man, and still learn something from. Whether you’re interested in getting in shape, maximizing your energy, or just learning the art of ordering a man’s drink in the bar… you’ll find the information in this section. Alpha Living is a way of life that you’ll hopefully continue throughout your lifetime. It is about fulfilling your dreams… and doing so in style.

Stories, Tales, Lies, and Exaggerations
The fun stuff! Over the past five years, Mike Stoute and I have chronicled our stories on TSB. These are the stories that made Bobby and Mike the men they’ve become. You’ll read some inspiring stories… and other stories that display our humiliation. Some stories will educate you… other stories will entertain you… and other stories will have you asking “why the hell did I ever take advice from these guys?”

31 Days to Better Game
31 Days to Better game was an extremely popular series we ran at TSB Magazine where we presented a different lesson every day that would
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bloggers. and gurus. Whether you’re a novice or an experienced PUA. I think you’ll enjoy this section a lot. I believe that you can get something out of following the 31 day plan. 8 .COM help you improve your dating life. The lessons were brought to you by some of the best dating coaches. all giving their unique perspective on improving certain areas of game. There are 31 lessons that walk you through many different areas of game.The Best of TSBMAG.

Social Superstar Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript Table of Contents Introduction Chapter 1: What defines a superstar? Chapter 2: Image is everything (authority + social proof) Chapter 3: The 10 Second Impression (authority + social proof) Chapter 4: Building Your Social Resume (authority + social Proof) Chapter 5: The Attitude (liking + scarcity) Chapter 6: Be Captivating (liking + scarcity + authority) Chapter 7: Cultivate a fan base (commitment + liking + reciprocation) 9 .

It was around 2002 and that I found the underground seduction community. And with those friends and fans… women will naturally follow. This manuscript was first conceived while I was back in college. Robert Ciaduini. If you follow the guidance of this manuscript. One of my friends and I attended a private seminar held by social scientist Dr. Ciaduini.into a group of men who threw 400+ people parties. Pick-up artists are usually defined by their ability to cold approach a random woman and quickly close her. This manuscript is about building an empire of friends and fans. The only reason I have not released it up until now is because many of the strategies contained in this manuscript I have personally used within some of my current social circles." I found them to be even more effective.COM Introduction This manuscript has been developed over the past 10 years. and we applied to the realm of climbing the social ladder. which focused on the psychology of influence.The Best of TSBMAG. After graduating college I took the principles originally constructed and altered them a bit for "the real world. It works. Everything in this manuscript has been tested and refined. and were even featured on prime time news for our antics at the Homecoming day parade.you will never have the need to cold approach again. 10 . It was at this point that I took the original manuscript and began altering it to include some more of the hidden techniques of some of the world's best pick-up artists. At that point I was just coming out of a relationship and began studying the art of seduction. This manuscript is not going to teach how to be the world's best pick-up artist. We took the teaching of Dr. The teachings in this manuscript transformed my friends back at Montclair State University from relative nobodies.

First. focus on specific aspects of them. You should picture their specific body language. posture. People will naturally want to be around them. Listen to the way they construct their conversations. When you think of social superstars. or Johnny Depp. No matter how different the external image of these guys may seem. While simply copying their characteristics will not land you roles in motion pictures. Listen to the way they talk. Tommy Lee. Listen to the way they use humor casually. charming. hear the way their voice sounds when it comes out of their mouths. What aspects of them are unique and unlike the many others you come in contact with who don’t possess their charisma? 11 . They will want to be associated with them. Other people want to drink in the enthusiasm. Now I want you to spend a minute writing down the different characteristics of them that jumped out at you. and sense of personal style. or simply enigmatic. or have you quarterbacking in the Super Bowl -it will have you commanding the power and respect these guys have.who come to mind? Maybe you know a few guys personally who have this characteristic? Or maybe you immediately think of a guy like George Clooney.Social Superstar Chapter 1: What Defines A Superstar? So you want to be a Social Super star? And live large? Some guys are just born with inane gift to control the energy of any room they enter. Right now. there are certain characteristic that they all share. These guys will often be referred to as charismatic. and vitality that the social superstar produces. Tom Brady. within your specific social scene. Spend a minute to get a clear picture of them in your mind. These characteristics are the blue print for social superstardom. Envision the way the carry themselves. energy. Once you have a clear picture of them in your mind. I would like you to take the time to think about the guys you have met in your personal life who have best exemplified the image of social superstar.

you'll realize that by using the principles of persuasion and influence. Imagine the way their entourage would follow one of their commands. the envy that other people felt towards them. I will repeat this phrase for emphasis: It has everything to do with the way that people react to them. 12 . Write down the desire that women had toward them. If you want to become a Social Superstar. by understanding that there is nothing unique inside of these menyou'll know that you too are capable of reaching their level. fundamentally it has nothing to do with them at all. In fact.COM After you have jotted down a list of the distinct characteristics I want you to dig a little deeper. Or the energy that is sucked out of the room when they depart. First. Imagine the way a woman would react to one of their advances. Now spend a minute writing down the different ways in which people react to them. and why you want to become it. is because it is my way of outlining the goal for this manuscript. The reason that I have asked you to write down both the specific characteristics of these men and the specific ways in which people reacted to them. The Reaction They Receive What you must first understand going forward is that what causes these men to rise to the level of social superstar has nothing to do with what is inside of them. Envision the look on people’s faces when they walk into a room. and ideally onto a greater stage. And second. Try to capture in words. you must first have a clear goal of what you are trying to become. In the following chapters I will delve much deeper into the process you must go through to elevate yourself to Social Superstar status amongst your social scene.The Best of TSBMAG. Over the course of this manuscript you will learn to use the principles of persuasion and influence to climb to the highest level of any social ladder. Hear the way people speak about them when they were not around.you can manipulate the reaction you receive by others. I want you to envision the way other people react to them. It has everything to do with the way that people react to them. This is important for you to fully comprehend this for two main reasons. Try to describe the energy that these social superstars instilled in others around them. You can't become a superstar if you don't have fans propping you up.

The Plan: Image is everything. trendy. They don’t flag you down. It is how you carry yourself. Your image should also convey social proof. The SL500 Mercedes convertible. The image you present to the world should establish you an authority on your scene. They don’t yell out for your attention. Because if you’re waiting for them to dictate what you can wear. their fine details. The Corvette. In this chapter you just need to recognize that by being trendy and fashionable you are presenting yourself as having a high level of social intelligence. what cars catch your attention? The Ford Taurus? The Toyota Corolla? No.you are actively involved with "cooler" social circles. The Porsche. The 745i series. But you notice these cars. or hip. or what music 13 . People will automatically assume that since you have the social intelligence to stay fashionable. These cars are sitting right alongside of hundreds of other cars. You can’t wait for your peers to tell you what to like. These cars have a presence and if you want to be a social superstar you need to have just as powerful of a presence. When you walk into a parking lot. Think like this.Social Superstar Chapter 2: Image is everything (Authority + Social Proof) Your objective: The objective of creating an image is to establish both authority and social proof. Your image should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are the person to look up to for determining what is cool. You need to know what the current trends are before most everyone else. You have to be ahead of them with the trends. and their alluring Image. and say “look at me” But these are the cars you look at because of their reputation. You need to dress fashionably.

If you’re going for a preppy look choose someone like Matt Damon. Everything else can be second hand. money. The examples I’m giving may be outdated by the time you read this. You’re right. It isn’t called “being trendy” for nothing. And once they’ve run their course and 14 . I always suggest modeling yourself after a celebrity that you most resemble or whose style you would like to emulate. You want to copy their style from their day to day life. and energy toward you image. Another option that I’ve done is go to thrift shops or Salvation Army stores with clip outs of outfits you want to put together.COM you can listen to. If you’re going after the “bad ass” look you would want to choose someone like Colin Farrell. Social Superstars know what the current trends are because they are keenly aware of what is going on. A solid pair of kicks is your best investment. This is the basis of who you are in the public eye. But it is also important to pick someone who fits the style you are going after. or they have friends that are keenly aware telling them what is going on. If you’re more of the athlete type choose someone like Tom Brady or Tony Romo. But the sneakers must be the real deal. Choose someone who is well known and followed in the media. Celebrities pay fashion consultants thousands of dollars to keep them trendy… there is no reason not to take advantage of the lessons they teach with every outfit they wear. But what you can do is mimic the clothes by purchasing similar outfits of less expensive brands. and magazines to know what the trends are. You are probably thinking that you can’t afford the clothes they are wearing. When it comes to creating your image. Choose someone in their twenties. blogs. If you don’t have “cool” friends then you need to be following fashionable websites. chances are by the time you’re wearing it. You can’t. Generally I recommend picking a celebrity you most resemble.The Best of TSBMAG. You can also start putting more of your focus. Instead of dropping $60 on a new video game… buy a pair of the trendiest sneakers you can find. what you see in the gossip magazines. If you’re the artsy music type choose someone from a popular band. You can by a whole new wardrobe for like $50. You need to be up to date with the trends. Spend $100 if you have to. You don’t want to copy their style from a movie. it’s out of style.

Your posture should make you appear to be confident and at ease with your surroundings. You may cast a glance.esteem and confidence. Meaning. work on maintaining a healthy tan. * If you’re white.not even the blonde-bombshell walking by can shake this poise. It is the total package. friendly smile is a strong weapon. pay attention to your posture so that it seems as though you are. No sunshine? Find a nearby tanning salon. And if you don’t have a high 15 . and what to say when you speak. A good pair of sneakers or shoes is the cornerstone of a good wardrobe. it is easy to stand out when you have it and it shows. * Flaunt a sincere. and stand. body language.from The 7 Elements of Charisma. * What is your mind set? You are in a situation that requires a strong focus on tact and diplomacy. friendly smile at strategic intervals (but don’t overdo it . tonality. People around you WILL notice this and subconsciously decide that you ARE a person of prestige. In the end. and posture to build immediate social proof. But for remainder of this chapter I want to give you some more hints on how to make your image more appealing. you’re not paying too much attention to any one person) . Even if you’re not at ease. knowing when to speak. It breaks the ice.and that’s because you feel that there is nobody worthy of your attention. automatically paints you as a person of high self. A sincere.Social Superstar gone out of style. In a world where most people lack a high level of self-respect. knowing when not to speak. your goal is to give off the impression that you’re a prestigious person accustomed to ranking high in social circles .learn to read when it is called for. In the next chapter. tears down people’s walls. Buy a new pair. In other words. I am going to go into great detail about how to use things like physiology. sit. but you’re too prestigious to stare. and when it’s not). and knowing how to carry yourself throughout. you’re never “star-struck” because you are the star. * Pay attention to how you walk. But image is more than just wearing trendy clothes. * How do your eyes follow the crowd? As if you’re disinterested (meaning. The Elements of Image and Charisma Here are some other tips to enhance your presence and image . The 10 Second Impression.

Most people don’t understand the charismatic persona and can only assume that it comes naturally to some people.The Best of TSBMAG. In the chapter on attitude I will give you tips to help the right attitude to come naturally to you. Many elements make up Image. By themselves.something that we practice in our daily encounters with others until it is developed over time. someone who listens more than he speaks? Or will I seem as though I talk too much and therefore am not a good conversationalist? 16 . you will be prejudged as a person who is probably charismatic and worthy of respect and even admiration. If you look like your gay. This is what he or she expects. it’s that much easier to create the effect that you’re after. like most).COM level of self-respect (again. or will I sound fake? Will I come across as a good conversationalist. You need to give off the impression that you are an important person and are considered an important person by others. For the rest of us. Here’s an analogy: If you look like a thug. you’ll be prejudged as probably being a thug. And now you’ve created “presence. You need to always be conscious of how you appear to other people. you’ll be prejudged as probably being gay. these simple details regarding a positive. Take note . Maybe for a very rare and select few. but when packaged together they merge for great effect. now it’s that much easier to give it to them. then fake it.” When creating a charismatic image.the trick to faking it is to fake it with sincerity (this will be repeated further along). prestigious selfimage don’t accomplish much. And if you look like a charismatic person used to respect and even admiration. you’re using this instinct to your advantage (which most people can’t control because they’re unaware that it is something happening in their subconscious). Once you’ve been prejudged. * Before speaking to a person. And because they expect it. Notice that we used the word “probably” in the above paragraph? We use the word “probably” to represent the other person’s expectations. It is a very influential tool when you want something. Charisma opens many doors and will get you into many places otherwise far off limits. it is an acquired art . you ask yourself: How is this person going to interpret my next few words? What kind of effect are they going to have? What effect is it that I’m going for? Will I sound like I know what I’m talking about? Or will I sound like a fool? Will I sound confident? Or will I sound cocky? Will I sound sincere. presence is but one.

If you don’t have any clue what makes a good conversationalist read through some of the articles on http://www.hurrying betrays a lack of control over yourself. This means even when you are not actively engaged in a conversation you need to present you best image. 17 . or hurts your image in any other way.’). a coward. Below are some tricks you need to convey: * Never seem to be in a hurry . These articles should provide a nice foundation for becoming a better conversationalist.Social Superstar The above advice is sound. You just want to think for a brief second if what you are saying conveys confidence and coolness. Cloak your focus on the elements (which will more than likely seem intense when you first start practicing the art) by being confident on the outside and relaxed on the inside. you are being watched at all times. act effortlessly. means ‘So slight as to be difficult to detect or analyze.so when you act. and over time. or if it makes you sound like a showboat. * Your actions must seem natural and executed with ease . What you say doesn’t have to be perfect. as if you know that everything will come to you eventually. * Always seem patient. You need to be a good conversationalist.com about building conversation skills.tsbmag.” as used here. Never let them see you sweat. elusive.. but you don’t want to fall into the trap of constantly being inside your head worried about what you are going to say.. * Practice being subtle (”subtle. as if you could do much more. Remember.

Your non-verbal communication should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are used to being treated well. and squished. he is of above average looks. As you sip your beer you are making 10 second judgments on everyone that passes your table. the guy just stands there. While the bartender is serving a girl on the other end of the bar. nervously rubbing his chin. slouched down. and neither of them has squeezed over an inch to let him in. You are observing everything that is going on around you. And it should present you as a man with high social intelligence. but so has every girl's who was 18 . The non-verbal communication you present to the world should establish you an authority on your scene. and an expensive watch. The man walks up to the bar. avoiding eye contact with the other patrons. The bartender is busy and the man is forced to wait there for his drink a moment. a stylish haircut. The combination of these three attributes you will provide you with the requisite social proof you need. Your Plan: Imagine that you're sitting at a table in a crowded bar. He keeps timidly putting a finger up to get the bartender's attention.The Best of TSBMAG. trendy jeans. wearing a nice button down shirts. Not only has your perception of him changed. There is a person to his right and left. In less than a minute your entire perception of him has changed. It should convey that you are comfortable as the leader. A man walks by.COM Chapter 3: The 10 Second Impression (authority + social proof) Your Objective: The objective of manipulating your non-verbal communication is to establish both authority and social proof. but those around you appear to respect you and look up to you. Your 3 second judgment so far is positive. You are not only completely comfortable within your scene.

your social intelligence. These are the non verbal cues that people look for when making a snapshot judgment on someone else. and which of the students were bound to be eating their lunch alone in the cafeteria. their walks. It is all prominently on display by the way they carry themselves. in a nice outfit. and the amount of eye contact that they make with other students. You need to create the irresistible offer. "The Irresistible Offer" is the title of a book by Mark Joyner. But that is not enough to be a superstar. If you walked into any high school in America. within minutes you would be able to tell which of the students were of the popular crowd. and has a body most guys would kill for… but he just looks uncomfortable and out of place. the benefits. Everything we've gone over in the preceding chapters regarding creating the look of a superstar is important. and physical appearance. There are certain telling cues that allow people to make instant decisions about your level of self esteem. 19 . grooming. and your sex life. There is a saying I love "Walk the talk.Social Superstar eying him down as he walked by. You need to not only present them with the features. you must present your physical attributes in the best possible light. you have extremely limited time to catch the public's attention." The Irresistible Offer This means that you need to be completely congruent in all areas of your identity. Yes. but you also must take away any last hint of doubt. We've already discussed fashion. That guy… standing alone waiting for his drink. You wouldn't have to speak to a single one of them. you must dress fashionable and cool. in your best outfit. But you must be aware that there is more at play then how you are dressed up. He claims that in today's marketplace. Yes. the proof. So has the perception of every guy who was subconsciously sizing himself up against the guy for dominance on the social hierarchy. in which he talks about how the best marketers create a short pitch that is so powerful that it is almost impossible not to buy. tan. Although all of the physical signs should be pointing to "cool" it is apparent that he is anything but. He's a good looking guy. We've talked about how it is important that you always present your best self.

you will be identified as a fraud immediately. says "It's true I dress in a sexy way… and if a woman was going to fuck a guy in ten minutes he'd probably look like me… but no. After his powerful stories of success." 20 . As we will discuss later in "Never appear too perfect" you must show some vulnerability and flaws… the flaws just can't come involve any of these cues. and has a cult following of men who aspire to be like him. In the first few minutes of the speech Brad gave some details about the various 10 minute lays that he has had in his lifetime. The first student says. he asked the audience why they believed he is able to continually have women willing to sleep with him after knowing him for less than a half hour. They can bring you onto MTV's Made. If you are going to create yourself to be "the irresistible offer" you need to hit them from every one of these angles.COM The best way to remove any last hint of doubt is to "Walk the talk" and carry yourself like a superstar. I was at a seminar listening to the legendary Brad P speaking about how to get a 10 minute lay. and must stand up to the test of scrutiny. In the following sections we are going to go into detail in the different areas that make up your non verbal cues.The Best of TSBMAG. These areas in include: body language. and makeup artists in the world… but if you're body's non verbal cues remain the same. I am extremely confident. personal trainers. eye contact. I don't want you to mistakenly interpret this to mean that you must be perfect. and how well you follow the general rules of intrapersonal communication. posture. that isn't why. Everything about you needs to be congruent." A third student says "It's got to be that you know how to talk to a girl in a way that will get them horny enough to fuck you. Brad is a well known social artist. who dresses like a rockstar. but there are a lot of extremely confident guys who don't pull girls into random bathrooms for spontaneous sex" A second student says "Because of the way you dress. The way you carry yourself is the one thing that cannot be faked. One by one members of the audience raised their hands to give their input." Brad. "Because you are extremely confident" And Brad says "Yes. and have you done up by the best fashion consultant.

"I get ten minute lays because I am all seven of these answers. Meanwhile Brad has been writing each answer down on the teleprompter in front of him. We may keep our gaze on the man." How to Create Comfortable Body Language Sex is hypnotic. I am confident. brought to our minds all of our own insecurities. made us feel uncomfortable. the example we used of the man waiting for his drink. standing awkwardly alone." The students shout out several more answers. 4 Ways to Make Your Body Language More Hypnotic 1. Be relaxed 21 . anxieties. While it can be argued that all of the actors nailed the part… it is obvious upon watching a few scenes of Connery as Bond to notice just how comfortable he appears in the role. Finally Brad points to the seven answers on the screen. None of these feelings are sexy. If you want to create a hypnotic presence as a superstar… you need to be so comfortable in the role that your audience accepts your role without reservations. "Everything" Brad says. Sean Connery is highly regarded as the actor that best portrayed the character James Bond. The man. "Oh… I get them so horny they can hardly contain themselves when I talk to them… but a lot of guys can talk a good game. and fears. and I make it impossible for them to not want to fuck me in ten minutes…" Brad presents the women he meets with "the irresistible offer. They key to creating hypnotic body language is comfort. His body language makes you forget that you're watching an actor PLAY James Bond.Social Superstar And Brad says. That's why it's used so blatantly in advertisements. So what is the secret to hypnotic body language? It is easier than you think. but we would be doing so in the same way we that we just can't turn away from a car wreck. I talk good game. How do you give your appearance that same hypnotic appeal as sex? In the previous section. He is so comfortable in the role… that you believe he is James Bond. I have sexy body language. I am dressed like a rock star.

If you want to achieve relaxing body language you first must relax all of your muscles. But if you learn to control your physiology. your heart rate naturally follows. How you stand 2. The easiest and most productive way to relax your mind is through slow controlled breathing. slowly those around you will tend find themselves falling into a relaxed state. causing an almost crawled up appearance. How you sit Here is an explanation of each. you can use it to your advantage pretty regularly. This is especially true of your facial muscles. In order to make physiology work in your favor it is necessary to recognize your nervous habits.The Best of TSBMAG. Along with relaxing your muscles you need to relax your mind. Be Relaxed The easiest way to make people comfortable around you is to be relaxed around them.COM 2. If your mind is nervous… it will be harder to control your physiology. When we are nervous we tend to tense up our jaw muscle. What you are basically trying to do is put yourself in a sort of hypnotic state of relaxation. and stop the nervous. How you walk/move 3. so that you can put an end to them. Be confident 4. Be powerful 3. The interesting thing about physiology is that once you learn how to manipulate it. tense gestures… your brain will assume a position of relaxation. Slow down We are going to show you how to demonstrate these four qualities to further illustrate how to create a compelling presence. If you are nervous and tense when you go out… naturally the physiology you present will be that of a nervous and tense person. 22 . The more relaxed you appear to be. There are three main body positions in most social situations which you can use to convey comfort: 1. Once you slow your breathing down. We also tend get really tense in the shoulders. Subconsciously people tend to mirror the people they are surrounded by.

You’ll notice a marked improvement in your interactions. moving around too much. The emotion of nervousness often manifests itself through these nervous behaviors. let them hang naturally by your sides. Some people will rub their chin or neck. When people feel insecure or nervous they start to have trouble sitting still. Doing any of these things immediately screams that you are not comfortable in your present situation. Looking relaxed while standing Nervous ticks such as swaying from side to side. or playing with your drink all tell the set and everyone around you that you are not only nervous around them. other people with run their hand through their hair. At the beginning you’ll have to force this. but after some practice. 23 . Fight the urge to start rubbing. but that they are higher value and thus. You don’t know what to do with your hands so you shove them in your pockets. The beautiful thing as I mentioned earlier is that the discontinuation of performing these nervous ticks will trigger in your brain that you are no longer nervous… and your brain will command you to act in the way you naturally do when you are comfortable. you’ll start to automatically relax more in social situations. Instead. Eliminate them. you are emotionally reacting to them. but after enough training you will naturally no longer perform these nervous ticks. Force yourself to relax and let your arms just fall. Their insecurity eats away at them and they feel forced to constantly be moving their hands. It is important to remember to keep control of your hands. At first it may be a constant battle with yourself. playing with your hands or fingers. others will juggle the loose change in their pocket. Get in the habit of catching yourself whenever you find that you are performing any of the above habits.Social Superstar Below are some of the nervous habits that you will need to avoid… and ultimately replace with more positive empowering habits. The minute that you recognize yourself using your hands to display nervousness… immediately stop and place your hands by your side in a relaxed manner. or fiddling. touching. This behavior communicates that you’re nervous and that you feel awkward. Looking relaxed when walking One of the most common ways a man displays nervousness while walking is to keep his hands in his pockets as he walks.

The Best of TSBMAG.” This is when people hold their drink in front of their chest in a social environment.COM Another thing to be conscious of when you're standing in a bar or club is the “drink shield. This helps you maintain control and good body posture. As we spoke about above in relation to "being relaxed" you will find that the more powerful a physiology you present. Feet belong on the floor. A superstar knows how to balance the two. 24 . Instead. If you are constantly crossing and un-crossing your feet and legs you'll appear uncomfortable. Being Powerful While having a relaxed appearance will surely make others around you feel more comfortable. In this case it’s the drink. Don't squeeze your hands. You will need to incorporate several other characteristics into your body language. it is not enough to create that hypnotic captivating presence. security. A low value person can be relaxed… but very few low value people will be both relaxed and powerful. but if you find that you are fidgeting too much then cup your right hand face down in your left hand. hold your drink down by your hip and don’t cross your arms or take a protective stance. One of which is power. The reason that you want to display power and dominance is because these qualities communicate value. the objective is to take up space while appearing relaxed and comfortable. The subcommunication behind this body language tick is that you’re nervous and uneasy. There is nothing good that your fingers can do above your neck. Don’t overdo ‘taking up space’ lest you come off as tryhard. alone. It is best to keep your hands apart. which is face up. So your instinctive reaction is to cover your midsection (traditionally the most vulnerable spot on most mammals) with some sort of protection. simply let them lay together on your lap. While you are seated it is best to keep both feet on the floor. and relaxation with your body language. you will naturally come to feel more powerful. creating a silly looking distraction. You are trying to convey abundance. keep your hands away from your face and hair. Looking relaxed while sitting When you sit. Once seated. and if you keep one foot on your knee while talking you might have a tendency to shake the free foot.

as they appear to have nothing to offer. If you think that you're having trouble being heard then maybe you should work on your tonality and voice projection. one of three things happens typically: I. II. The Gunslinger Walk is based off of an article originally published by Sebastian Drake. Another way to give your power away is to lean in when talking to someone. You both move halfway out of the way. It displays a lack of enthusiasm and energy towards life. Whenever this happens to you. You then go on to walk as if this long cape is flowing down your back. One of the hallmark traits of this behavior is head straight. as I think this article is best representation of keeping your power as you walk. You move for the other person." The "cape walk" is technique in which you imagine you have a Superman cape hanging down your back. Looking powerful when walking One of the most efficient ways to walk in a more powerful way is to implement the Gunslinger Walk..Social Superstar I learned this technique years ago while listening to an Anthony Robbins CD in which he describes "the cape walk. 25 . These are not the kind of people other people want to interact with. After experimenting with the "cape walk" for several weeks I began to naturally feel more powerful as I walked. The minute you lean in you have just handed them the power in the conversation.these impressions present that of a less than powerful person.. and make a conscious effort to recondition yourself to avoid the negative habit in the future. people often get into a situation where two people are walking directly at each other. It is important to learn some of the ways that people give their power away as to avoid them. This displays the image that you’re too bored or tired to bother holding up your head. Avoid holding your face up with your hand. III. Throughout society. People that feel a lack of power tend to offer nothing to the world. It can also give off the impression that you’re uncomfortable with the way you look and are trying to hide your face. Here is the article in its entirety. Many times guys do this because they believe that the other person cannot hear them. The other person moves for you.

self-assured smile finishes the look. and inspiration into the hearts of those around them.COM People move for people that they see as higher status than them subconsciously. and they will move the other half step. you will feel people who believe themselves lower social status than you moving out of your way as you move through the world without you even doing anything. or just the way he carries himself. The key elements of a Gunslinger’s Walk are: Horizonview: Staring beyond the crowd and expecting it to part. or young children . Roll in the heels: An exaggerated roll of the heels at the end of each step. With a solid presence. you NEVER move for another person based on status alone.especially a beautiful woman you’re signifying that you see her as better than you. Men who moved with raw electrifying presence. It’s mirrored off people who brim with the utmost confidence. This does not bode well for meeting her later. Simply observing one of these people can strike wonder. but it can be a hell of a lot of fun. Thrown back shoulders: The essence of good body language. With people who are also high status. The man might have status from a style of dress. Knowing smile: The disarming. The most common and obvious example are beautiful women.and that’s it. You’ll move if you meet someone handicapped. Slow movement: Moving extremely slowly through crowds.either the white-hat sheriff. Henceforth. and then high status men. large muscles. When you move out of someone’s way . Gunslinging isn’t necessary. 26 . elderly.The Best of TSBMAG. or the black-hat bandit. awe. The Gunslinger’s Walk is a highly exaggerated style of walk based on highly successful men and the caricature and archetype of an 1800’s gunslinger . Roll in the hips: An exaggerated push from the hips with each lift of the leg. you will move a half-step out of the way.

Every time two people walk directly towards one another in a straight line. In modern times. if someone is stopped. pushing off the ball. it’s hard to get people to move for you. you see the most beautiful women and high status men not looking at people directly in front of them. it becomes a negotiation. everyone is forced to go around them. Thrown back Shoulders Rise up to your full stature. He moved with purpose. By taking a long past view at the horizon. and “roll through” into the front of your foot. and with his full stature. you transcend the negotiation and the struggle. but instead staring past them into the distance as they think about what goals they want to achieve. Roll in the Hips and Heels When your foot lands. Ka-ching… ka-ching… ka-ching… Throw your hips into your walk. Remember to keep your shoulders back and broad at all times. So move slower than people around you . staring off into the horizon and the adventures that lay beyond. and people are more likely to move out of the way of you as you pass. you can mentally imagine a “ka-ching” sound like a cowboy’s spurs every time your foot touches the ground.he never made himself small. To aid you. with your chest out and your stomach in.it gives you a 27 . as opposed to just trying to court attention. Slow Movement When gunslingin’. The lower value person moves from the way of the higher person. This will add to your stature once again. land first with your heel. It’s crucial to keep your view to the horizon if you’re rolling your hips: You look like you’re a larger than life figure that way. and draw a bit more attention to yourself. or meek. To take this to its logical extreme. or falsely humble. rolling them through so you rock ever so-slightly back and forth each time you move. it’s crucial to move at a slow pace.Social Superstar The Horizon view The legendary cowboys did not look at a crowd as they moved through it: Their eyes were always looking past. Picture the cowboy . When you hurry through the world.

Directing Traffic One last tip that’ll help with gunslinging. knowing.then two. one person moves . A slight smile goes a long way with gunslinging to keep curiosity mixed in and soften you up slightly. with your palm facing towards they way you want them to go. if you choose to try it. makes you look powerful. which creates quite a stir. How to Part a Crowd Here’s the secret behind my legendary gunslinging performances: Once two people simultaneously break out of your way at the front of a crowd. The key is to lift up the opposite hand of the way you want the person to go. so get the fundamentals down first. with a slight knowing smile.COM presence. you look at one point off into the distance where you’re walking. moving slowly. You can “direct traffic” by which hand you hold up as people are walking towards you. Jackpot. Your palm should be facing left. The effect becomes more pronounced the more people who do it: So. people’s natural instincts are to follow the people in front of them. They assume that someone or something important is coming through. and means people scurrying will tend to defer to you. This “directs 28 . great body language. raise your right arm from your side upwards. This one’s a bit more advanced and complicated. you start gunslinging. there’s a great chance the crowd will break and you can then “part the seas” as you move through it. It’s a slight. remember to smile . So.don’t try to “look hard”. The Knowing Smile When gunslinging. and tend to break sideways. and quite an entrance. self-assured and self-confident smile. rolling your heels and hips. You don’t look at people in front of you that are oncoming. Then.The Best of TSBMAG. quite an impression. if you want someone to pass you on your left. with just a dash of cockiness mixed in. with a view on the horizon.

When you’re standing. Looking down even has been proven to have a bad effect on your mental state. Feet and legs can be spread moderately or crossed ankle-to-knee. though it’s tricky to get. Your upper body should ideally be leaning back without hunching over. Don’t go overboard with it. Your weight should generally be towards the rear of your soles (closer to the heel) so that you always appear to be leaning back. look up.Social Superstar traffic”. but one which clearly does not lend itself to laziness. You can observe this in others. Your hands should drape at your sides the way they naturally fall. was a clear example of standing in a less than powerful way. Marine would stand when at ease. Keep your head up. Sliding forward slightly in your seat will allow you to lean back even in a vertically-backed chair. squished between two other customers as he waited for his drink. you want to stand with your feet shoulder-width apart or slightly wider. and chest somewhat out. If you need to look away. 29 . Do not put your hands in your pockets or cross them over your chest. It should not be an uncomfortable stance. Looking powerful while sitting What you want to communicate is that you do not make any apologies for your existence and that you are used to always being comfortable. especially in nightclubs. so have fun and use it wisely. it’s a sign of weakness and also looks unattractive. Do not cross your arms over your chest for this reason. Picture the way a U.S. The Gunslinger’s Walk is a potential nuclear reactor in your social toolbox. Useful tactics to convey this include draping your arms over the backs of chairs or over the seatbacks of booths or couches. In the example we used earlier about the guy in the bar. standing up straight. or get high on the power… Looking powerful when standing If you want to have a powerful presence while standing than the first rule is to take up space. The main communication here is that you are comfortable and confident. Once you get it though. it’s invaluable. shoulders pulled back. In that example the man clearly gave up his power to the other two customers who forced him to stand there uncomfortably. Your stance should project confidence. never look down.

and eventually it won’t feel weird. and you wind up feeling a certain way just because you are acting that way. you look better standing straight. Co-workers and those around you often might comment that you seem…different. Keep going. the object is to convey dominance and purpose. Your feet. Pick a wall and stand up straight against it. Seriously. Now walk away from the wall. because it’s different and new. Just what we were going for. a clear one. like someone stuck a pole up your ass. Either way. Looking confident while walking If you read and follow the Gunslinger Walk as discussed above. take the shortest route 30 . etc).The Best of TSBMAG. and head should all touch the wall. The Japanese have long held the belief that a cluttered home leads to a cluttered mind. and when you change the way you move. It also can change your inner one. you also change the way you think. though. and a clean one.” Practice this in the mirror if you suspect they are moving unnaturally. butt. exerting about the same amount of pressure (no smooshing). the bathrooms. Cause and affect get blurred. How do you feel? Right. You’ll find yourself with this new confidence that wasn’t there before and doesn’t seem to have much of an explanation. it’ll start to feel good. but hold the pose for 5 minutes. The outer world touches our inner one. Except that you are standing like you are confident. you will naturally be projection power and confidence as you walk. even if they aren’t selfaware enough to know why. It’s going to feel weird for awhile.COM Being Confident As I mentioned earlier…there’s a bonus beyond the initial differences that changing your body language communicates to the outside world. Your hands should swing naturally at your sides while you walk but without looking either stiff or “floppy. and you project confidence to all comers. Women find you more attractive. shoulders. When you are moving towards something (a set. an exit. In fact. this works. Don’t believe me? Try it. Walk at about 50% of your normal speed when in the venue. When you walk or move.

Slowing down and taking deliberate actions Watch a few James Bond films. but for right now it is important to know that standing erect (not "stuck up") gives the impression that the person is confident. This will radiate from you. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. or shuffling your feet. alert. lack of confidence. Oftentimes women notice you and the way you move or interact with people and they make judgments about you before you’ve even noticed them. walk straight up with confidence. In an upcoming chapter on interpersonal communication rules I will go over the correct ways to interact with others. Looking confident while sitting The best way to appear confident while sitting is to follow the advice for both looking relaxed and powerful. Try learning how to turn your head slowly. optimistic. you give the impression of having low self esteem. Looking confident while standing If you are slumped over. This makes a huge impact on how others perceive you. slouching. and healthy. Instead of circling a set several times like a vulture. We will go into more detail regarding posture in the following chapter. when moving through the crowd. you will naturally become more confident in your interactions. self-assured. Once again. you want to project dominance. how to blink slowly. or if your head hangs down. He’s just too cool. Once you have a foundation for the laws of interaction. and even appearing depressed. simply following the rules for looking relaxed and powerful will make you appear more confident as you stand there. A relaxed and powerful person tends to appear very confident. 31 . Similarly. Have you ever noticed that James Bond never looks like he doesn’t know how to act? And that he never fidgets or behaves nervously? Everything James does is a little slower than it should be.Social Superstar possible—usually a straight line.

COM This kind of body language transmits the message: “I’m so comfortable in my own skin. it hurts”. Don’t slouch and look sloppy. and take big slow steps. Habit 4: Smile often. Create a little game with yourself to remind yourself to pay attention to your posture. Habit 2: Get in the habit of walking around with your head up and your neck straight. If you don’t have a naturally attractive smile than you should practice in front of a mirror. chest puffed out a bit. Try never to appear to be in a hurry or flustered. You need to keep your face free of this stress.The Best of TSBMAG. shoulders back. Tell your friends to point this out to you. neck up. This is especially true of your facial muscles. Habit 6: You should keep your feet about as far apart as your shoulders. Habit 3: Keep your muscles relaxed. Habit 7: Take up space when you sit. Habit 8: Walk with confidence and power. When we tend to get nervous we tense up in the jaw. This means your head should be high. A smile displays a positive energy that is infectious. This is another habit you will have to check often to avoid falling back into the old habit of slouching. Look around slowly and smoothly. Your new body language habits to implement immediately Habit 1: Make it a practice to hold eye contact with everyone that you meet. The idea is to take up some space. If you’re talking to a group of people switch eye contact up between the different members of the group… but always be holding it with someone. If someone else is talking to you. but don’t be afraid to get comfortable. Spread yourself out a bit. don’t dart around and jolt your head around like you have been drinking espressos all day long. In the beginning you will need to constantly be checking yourself. While doing the talking you should be holding eye contact for the majority of the time. Also walk with direction. This is especially true when walking through a bar… you never want to give off the vibe that you’re looking for the cool place to 32 . hold eye contact about 50% of the time. Habit 5: Push your chest out a bit and pull your shoulders back.

Habit 9: Avoid making sudden hyper gestures. Think Lenny Kravitz. When talking to someone avoid clutching on to your beer or putting your hands in your pocket. Think Jim Morrison.Social Superstar be.” Try learning how to turn your head slowly. He is promising chivalry. Habit 10: Use hand gestures when telling a story. These guys knew how to command a stage with their bodies. Tommy Lee. They had their audiences hypnotized by their movements. do it slowly like it doesn’t embarrass you that she noticed. and gentleness." In the movie Michael Caine's character teaches Steve Martin's character how to be a European style gentleman. How to improve your posture 33 . It is also the grace in which they move across the stage. Rock Star Posture A signature of any rockstar is their posture. and are routinely making the necessary adjustments. The trick to pulling all these habits together is to use slow calculated gestures. how to blink slowly. If you’re giving a girl a once over. If you’re grabbing a drink off the bar take it at a speed that says “I’m in no hurry. elegance. A man becomes more attractive when he exhibits grace and poise. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. You want to give off the vibe that you know where it is and already are heading there. If you want to see an example of a man going through this transformation. Most of us have downright horrible posture… let alone rockstar posture. and poise. Every gesture you make should flow naturally at the same speed as your previous gestures. you can have the same hypnotizing poise as Jim Morrison. Think Billy Idol. It's like he is embodying the hypnotic characteristics that make romance novels so popular. grace. The good news is that if you make yourself constantly aware of how your body appears. David DeAngelo commonly recommends his students to watch "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. gestures. It takes a constant and conscious effort to achieve rockstar posture.

When you tell someone to work on their posture they automatically start walking around like they are in the Marines. If you're unaware of what good posture looks like rent some James Bond movies. but the spine itself curves in a slight 'S'. these are the curves found from the base of your head to your shoulders and the curve from the upper back to the base of the spine. You might feel like you are leaning forward. you're probably forcing your back into an unnatural position. 4. Most people think that to "stand up straight" means tensing your back to heave your chest 'in and up'. Do not tilt your pelvis forward. These points make a straight line. Good posture involves training the body to stand. you might not have the money to hire their trainer… but that doesn't mean you can't emulate their posture and poise. and hips. make sure that your weight is evenly distributed on your feet. If you're serious about working on your posture you better get comfortable standing in front of a mirror. Now follow the above steps: 1.COM Most people don't even know what good posture is. but you don't. Keep your shoulders back. The spine has two natural curves that you need to maintain called the 'double C' or 'S' curves. 6. Tuck your stomach in. walk. It shouldn't hurt at all if you try this. If you've got a mirror nearby go to it right now and align your ears. If it does. 5. These guys are trained by professionals to be the embodiment of a movie star. Do not tilt your head forward. When standing straight up. Hold your head up straight with your chin in. Stretch the top of your head toward the ceiling. Or any movie starring George Clooney. You'll need to constantly be watching yourself. Make sure your earlobes are in line with the middle of your shoulders. 3. sit and lie in positions where the least strain is placed on supporting muscles and ligaments. or Brad Pitt. 2. backward or sideways. The arches in your feet should be supported. and look stupid.The Best of TSBMAG. Tom Cruise. and pulling your head back in to your chest. Stretching and exercise to improve posture 34 . This isn't the posture you should be striving for. your knees straight and your back straight. shoulders. Sure.

As you'll find in later chapters… a social superstar is looking for every excuse he can to find new ways to mingle with people and make new friends. You're not looking to build muscle mass… so you don't need to do the exercises with a large amount of weight. I'd probably start my day off doing them to feel fresh and add some extra energy to my morning. and then the opposite. right). Slowly lower arms to sides. Remember to keep your ears aligned! Bend forearms toward shoulders to touch your shoulder blades. or the microwave to beep. 3. Think about being able to place a bowl in the hollow of your back. While you wait for a web page to load. If you have the time I good idea might be to take a yoga class. 35 . curl your back upwards. Align your ears over your shoulders. You should at least feel a slight fatigue in the shoulder muscles. and gently massage your neck. 2. and your ears aligned. counting ten as you lower. Avoid rolling in a circle. Do 10 repetitions with both arms. constantly checking your alignment! If ten reps are too many to start. you can even do these exercises without hand weights. This is why it is important to do some of the following stretches: Tilt (stretch) your head in all four directions over your shoulders (forward. Be a penguin. alongside your ears. place elbows at your side. Align ears with shoulders. two) and lower them back to your waist (count one. raise both elbows (count one. On your hands and knees. counting to ten as you raise arms. When you first begin to improve your posture you might find that you neck or back will tend to get a little sore. Hold for a slow count of ten. Slowly raise arms back to shoulder height. left. Keeping your hands on your shoulders. then alternate 10 reps for each arm singularly. 1. You'll be surprised how much exercise fits into 30 seconds. toast to pop. Raise both arms straight up. do as many as you can. back. and touch your shoulders with your hands. Raise both arms out to sides at shoulder length. like a cat. In fact. as it may cause further strain. A yoga class is a perfect example of one of these methods.Social Superstar You want to do exercises that strengthen the muscles across your back and shoulders. Do ten reps. Do as many reps as your wait allows. When you first make the commitment to improve your posture you should repeat these exercises several times per day. two).

Stand against a wall with shoulders and bottom touching wall. not pushed out forward Stand straight and tall. These 3 areas are sitting.if it does not. with shoulders upright. But we know by now that "Rockstar Posture" is crucial for a superstar… here are some more ways you can improve in these areas. Sitting • • Sit in an office chair. the back of the head should also touch the wall . a footrest can be used along with the office chair. Flex your arms at a 75 to 90 degree angle at the elbows. Keep your shoulders straight. • • • • • Keep feet slightly apart. Keep both feet flat on the floor. You may have to adjust the office chair. Avoid locking your knees. and walking. • • • Standing Stand with weight mostly on the balls of the feet. If you're following the body language advice laid out in the previous chapter on these three areas you'll have already noticed a significant natural improvement in your posture. Align your back with the back of the office chair. especially when tired from sitting in the office chair for long periods. Avoid slouching or leaning forward. In this position. the head is carried too far forward (anterior head carriage). standing. about shoulder-width. If there's a problem with feet reaching the floor comfortably.COM As we discussed in the previous section on body language there are 3 general times the superstar needs to be keenly aware of his posture… and constantly working on improving it. 36 . Make sure your neck.The Best of TSBMAG. Tuck the chin in a little to keep the head level. not with weight on the heels. back. Let arms hang naturally down the sides of the body. and heels are all aligned. Be sure the head is square on top of the neck and spine.

37 . Tie a string on your finger." This statement is powerful because not only does it acknowledge the fact that we can read other people by simply looking into their eyes. fear. Avoid pushing your head forward. If this is really the case. The eyes are often referred to as "the windows to the soul. This means that for a couple months it is necessary that you are consciously aware of your posture. surprise. or sadness. Each of these emotions are easily expressed through our eyes. and create a feeling of arousal in the person you are trying to attract. It is probably most effective if you find a way to constantly be reminding yourself to be in tune with it. anger. disgust. The Eyes One of the most important and critical components of displaying powerful and confident body language is the eyes. Our eyes reveal more about us than any other part of our body. set your phone alarm to go off randomly as a reminder. then doesn't is make sense to have them hypnotized by your eyes and your understanding of their wants and desires? You can do this by using your eyes to build rapport. Keep shoulders properly aligned with the rest of the body. but that other people can read us by looking into ours. Standing in front of a mirror for a couple days practicing won't get you lasting results.Social Superstar Walking • • Keep the head up and eyes looking straight ahead. If you want lasting results you need to find a way to engrain this into your mind for a couple months. Just be glancing into someone's eyes you can often tell what is going on inside their mind. or keep an index card in your pocket with the words "Rock Star Posture" on it. A glance into someone's eyes can often reveal if they are experiencing happiness. And we all know how hard habits are to break. There are six basic emotions in the human race. The most important thing to realize when working on improving your posture is that bad posture is like a bad habit. There is an accepted idea that most people will judge other people within the first five seconds of meeting them.

men tend to fix their gaze on one or two particular women in a setting… not paying attention to the many other women that might be watching them. This acknowledgement could come in the form of a smile. As we will discuss in later chapters. Looking up in response to a question or while telling a story is fine. then chances are you misunderstood her eye contact. It is important to know that men and women have different comfort levels in regards to the amount of eye contact that they are willing to give and receive." This triangle extends from the ends of the eyebrows to the tip of this person's nose. If you don't get an acknowledgement back. 70% of the time you will at the other person in the "eyes triangle. you should always give one in return if you are interested. This is why it is important that if she gives you an acknowledgement. giving second glances to the men they are interested. Keep the focus of attention on the person you are talking to. and moving past the men they are not. Caress your partner with your eyes as you gaze into their eyes. In later chapters we will go into more details about picking up women. Women on the other hand. or eye brow raise. do not break to look at another person. and marketing yourself. 38 . When you intentionally break eye contact. In this chapter I want to discuss ways in which you need to continually be aware of how you can use your eyes to your advantage. or to the right. But eye contact in regards to picking up women is something that I will discuss more later.The Best of TSBMAG. In this chapter I want to give you some various pointers in regards to the use of eye contact in regards to body language. will casually scan the room. For instance. do so by looking down. and the various rules and insights that go along with the process. When you are talking to anyone it is generally accepted that you use the 70% rule in the United States. When you break eye contact. but looking up to break eye contact is often thought of as waning interest.COM When it comes to presenting confident body language. to the left. If you make eye contact with a woman it is a good idea to give an acknowledgement to let them know you have noticed and are interested. But it is important to know how to correctly use that eye power as to not intimidate or scare away the person that you are trying to attract. nod. knowing that you are always being watched… it is important to use eye contact correctly and efficiently. all of the experts will agree that strong eye contact indicates a powerful presence.

Women are better non-verbal communicators than men. the higher self esteem you actually rate yourself on. • • • • • • • Researchers have discovered that one of the most striking differences between people who are socially confident and those who are shy. the more self esteem you are perceived to have. Women engage in more eye contact them men do. they tend to be more self-disclosing about personal subjects. 39 . the longer the eye contact between two people. The more eye contact you can maintain. is that confident people have much more frequent eye contact with their conversational partners. Eye contact has been show to be a significant factor in the persuasion process. tending to look downward or away. They often contract when discussing issues that bring them sadness. the greater the intimacy that is felt inside. When eye contact decreases mend tend to disclose more and women tend to disclose less. The longer your eye contact. Many shy people never make eye contact at all. Attraction increases as mutual gazing increases. Pupils also enlarge when people are talking about things that bring them joy or happiness. Others rarely interrupt two people engaged in a conversation if they have consistent eye contact. When women are engaged in a great degree of eye contact. Men can improve though. instead of looking at their conversation partner’s face.Social Superstar Here is some scientific research on eye contacted as found in Kevin Hogan's book Irresistible Attraction: • • • • Generally speaking. One reason men aren't as good in reading body language is hat men often communicate sitting or standing side by side and don't see as much non-verbal communication as women do.

If you glance around the room too much. others have the opposite problem. the use of staring is part of a power struggle to determine which animal is dominant over the other. except in very rare situations. your conversation partner may assume that you are bored. Although some people use staring intently as a deliberate tactic to intimidate others. You may find that it eases your own discomfort if you let your vision go slightly out of focus. or look too frequently at other people. If it really bothers you to look directly into another person’s eyes. It can be very unpleasant to be on the receiving end of an intense stare. While some people have difficulty maintaining eye contact during conversations. In humans too. prefer to have a lot of eye contact when they are talking with someone. be sure to keep looking at that person frequently while you are talking. you can benefit from practicing in front of a mirror. In many animals. Whenever you are in conversation with someone. this is close enough to the eye region that you will appear to be looking at the person’s eyes. a friendly gaze will do. North Americans tend to assume that person is hiding something. When a person doesn't make eye contact with them.The Best of TSBMAG. particularly at close range. a struggle for dominance over another can often be signaled by a staring contest.COM Most North Americans. not all people who stare piercingly at others mean it as 40 . implying that they are untrustworthy. If you gaze generally at the eyebrow area or the bridge of the nose. You don’t need to use a piercing stare. or with another person. especially Caucasians. The very phrase "shifty-eyed" connotes a person whose eyes dart around the room. or that you are looking around for someone else you would rather talk with. often making their conversation partners feel very uncomfortable. prolonged staring into another person’s eyes. Avoid intense. They stare too intently into other people’s eyes when they are talking to them. you can look at the person’s face without focusing solely on the eyes. If you have difficulty knowing exactly how to make eye contact. keep the majority of your focus on the other person. even while you are wondering what to say next. When you are speaking with someone who is from a culture that prefers a lot of eye contact.

If you have grown up in a cultural group that expects eye contact. They want to see your eyes. averting your eyes and keeping them lowered is considered the polite. If it has been your habit to stare intently into the eyes of other people without looking away. These tips are from Kevin Hogan's Irresistible Attraction. In addition. There are many countries in the world where looking someone in the eye is considered to be disrespectful and an invasion of privacy. Are they clear or are they bloodshot? People who look at you will notice and the clearer your eyes the more attractive people will perceive you to be. you may have been making your conversation partners very uncomfortable. people of African American and First Nations origin usually prefer to make far less eye contact than Caucasians do. In North America. it can be a shock to find out that eye contact is not always welcomed. You can lighten the impression you are making by smiling more often. Key Components of Hypnotic eyes These are some ideas that you can take with you for using your eyes as a tool for marketing yourself better. nodding. If you are dealing with someone who has different cultural practices than what you are used to. but ultimately people want to see what they are getting. this is not true of all people. 41 • . In many cultures around the world. you can frequently glance away for brief periods. get ready to take them off.Social Superstar an act of aggression or dominance. Some people who stare very intently into the eyes of others are quite unaware of the negative impression they are creating. and by gazing at the entire face as well as the eyes. desirable thing to do. If you wear sunglasses. Although most North Americans like to have a lot of eye contact with their conversational partner. make an effort to be sensitive to the expectations of the other person if you want to have a smooth relationship. Hey can add Mystery. • Start with your eyes. Even within North America. there are some cultural groups that prefer not to make very much eye contact.

Eyebrow shrug. A favorite of television rakes and seducers. Make the person feel like they are the only person in the room that could possibly catch your eye. 5 non verbal gestures you should master using your eyes 1. Remember the longer they have eye contact with you the more emotional arousal they are experiencing inside. or is expecting a response . Slow. hard blink (two eyes). Look at a woman from shoulders up and she will think you have depth and personality. as in. It’s sufficiently mysterious that it gets girls wondering. This is the version that puts more social pressure on the girl (to qualify herself or retract a remark). you are looking away and to the right when you open your eyes. and shows a strong degree of social confidence and awareness on your part.COM • • • • • • If you wear glasses.it can almost be used as a dare or challenge. the wink is nonetheless a fantastic means of communication. but most folks can.you can shrug your eyebrows at her to let her know you’re interested. The wink is a great way to respond to a woman when she asks you a question you don’t feel like answering if she’s giving you a hard time… 3. In the other. or make a note when she shrugs hers at you. subtle shrug of the eyebrows (sometimes held longer) can also be used to express interest. Look at the person you are talking to about 70% of the time when communicating with them. If you want to attract someone. People need to see your eyes. “Did you actually just say that?” Two versions: in one. 2. Wink (one eye). Not everyone can do this. An eyebrow shrug can signify that a person is surprised. because she’s interested too. Avoid looking at others for any length of time when you are with someone who may be special. consider contacts or surgery. look at them. It is often done subconsciously by both men and women . 42 . This is an easy and effective way of communicating disbelief. you are looking straight at the girl when you open your eyes . Raising both eyebrows can be used to show a number of different moods and expressions.The Best of TSBMAG.this is the more playful (still with some social pressure) version. A quick.

while kind-of laughing/huffing in a “I can’t believe she said that” way. These guys don't always say a lot but they have the amazing ability to communicate more in glances and movements than most guys do in entire sentences. Basically. But even the interaction itself plays apart in how you come looking out of it. and simultaneously shrugging your eyebrows. When most people think of good conversationalists they automatically think the ability to talk well. If you are meeting a client or friend and you know that they are right handed sit to his right. In the previous three sections we discussed how critical body language. Think James Bond. posture.Social Superstar 4. For instance. What I mean by this is that there are certain rules that you can follow that will always present you in the best possible light. and your eyes are in creating a seductive hypnotic presence. Squint. These are the elements that make up an interaction. as the most socially conscious in the room. If he is left handed sit to his left. the simple act of selecting where you sit can display dominant alpha characteristics that will also facilitate the communication process. But in there is more to an interaction than just words. As we will discuss in future chapters… the ability to talk well is one of the most important characteristics of a superstar. You will see that many men who are good with women squint while they are talking to them. 43 . You hold this look and stare at her until she gives into the social pressure. It helps to place them in the position of being the slightly skeptical selector. The squint is a way of saying that you are thinking about something. Intrapersonal Communication Rules One of the hallmarks of a superstar is the way in which he interacts with other people. If you look at a woman and squint. you pull your lips into a half-smile (with one side of your mouth). 5. Here are some basic rules about choosing your seat in different circumstances. or alternatively that you doubt the truth or accuracy of something that is being said. This is when you look at a woman like she just said the most retarded thing you’ve ever heard. Think Don Draper. it can seem like you are sizing her up and trying to decide if you like her a lot. Ultra-skeptical look.

Keep performing them over and over again until it feels natural for your face to contort to those specific expressions. There are two solid ways to work on facial expressions. If you are attempting to communicate well with a female in business or a social setting. it just means that when you do enter this space you are doing so strategically and with specific intention. These are the first thing someone notices about you during conversation. Entering this space is done so at your own risk. practice them. Similarly. 44 . A pleasant. relaxed countenance that responds to conversation with a natural smile looks of alertness and interest. you also stand the risk of losing the focus of the client. if you leave the "casual personal" space of the other person. This is the ideal way because by videotaping yourself in a social situation you get to see how your face naturally contorts while in conversations. which is 19 inches to 4 feet. The second way to practice facial expressions is with the aid of a video camera. When you are communicating with another person you need to be consciously aware of your facial expressions and hand gestures. sparkling eyes.The Best of TSBMAG. This doesn't mean you can't lean in to share a secret with him or her. When you find the ones that look best. Intimate space is normally defined as an 18 inch bubble around the entire body of the other person. A smile not always changes the way people respond to you.COM If you are attempting to persuade another man you should be sitting across from each other. and an attentively tilted head are all looks that gain universal approval. you should be seated across from her at a smaller more intimate table. And these are "features" that are within your control. This is more "real" than looking in a mirror as you will have the opportunity to see all of your habits in action. but if positively changes your internal chemistry. Do you find that people often ask you what's wrong? Even when you're completely content? If so it means that you need to seriously work on your facial expressions. The first is to stand in front of a mirror and try out different expressions. Whether seated or standing you should stay out of the other person's intimate space.

nervous gestures such as tapping your fingers on a table and picking at your face or nails can make you look insecure. You can continue this process several times until you get rid of all of your nervous ticks. Likewise. posture. then you must find new expressions to replace them with. the guy who uses flailing. darting. Using your hands Some people talk with their hands. You need to be your own publicist. The use of a video camera can also really help you identify the body language. models. and eye contact habits that you may want to work on. and overcome it. But it is imperative that you face this. It is much more graceful and relaxing to cup your hands together. We will notice things that will probably make us feel embarrassed or ashamed. Work on it.Social Superstar Once you've identified the habits that you want to change. jerking or broad movements pushes people away be defining large space around off limits. Hand gestures generally take place in a square area defined up and down by the waist to the neck. For instance. This is why you must be conscious of what your hands are saying. and then once again have someone record you in a social situation. 45 . This is exactly the kind of training movie stars. Trust me. and musicians go through with their stylists and publicist. It is at this point that the use of a mirror will come in handy. There is a lot that can be communicated with the hands. unfavorable expressions. and from side to side by the width of your shoulders. and perfect your smile. this will be an uncomfortable exercise for most of us. Now you have specific goals that you want to achieve in regards to your facial expressions. It is incredible how much we don't know about ourselves until we carefully study ourselves on film. People from across the room can observe you and learn a lot about you by the way you use your hands in conversation.

This means that in order to coin yourself an expert in say. We want to be able to quickly classify a person into a certain group. and have performed some speaking engagements or received some media coverage relating to the subject. you would need to belong to several trade organizations. have a bunch of happy customers . and the appearances they’ve made. It is known that girls use this tactic all of the time in bars and clubs to make their judgments on guys. the testimonials they have. With this definition… in all likelihood. so that we know how to approach and deal with them. This is why it is taught in the community that you need to create social proof through being the most social guy in 46 . Building an online social resume allows you influence many more people with much less effort.The Best of TSBMAG. Building Your Social Resume If you use the above formula for “becoming an expert” and apply it to “becoming a social superstar” you will quickly see your social status sky rocket! We human beings don’t have the time or energy to really dig deeply to find out the truth about someone… so we look for the clues that will make these judgments easy for us.COM Chapter 4: Building Your Social Resume Your Objective: The objective of building your social resume is to create massive social proof for yourself. anyone can become an “expert” on any subject in a short period of time. the real estate world. I believe that you should view your social life in the same way. Your Plan: In The Four Hour Work Week Tim Ferriss points out that in today’s world the definition of an expert is largely created through the affiliations he or she belongs to.and then put that social proof on auto-pilot.

You affiliate with other rockstars. as someone would inevitably ask us about it. you get testimonials. and I plastered our Facebook pages with the pictures. How do you do this? You do this the same way a so-called expert builds his resume. Last week when we attended a reunion at our former college. The results were immediate. The value in the trip to the Mansion wasn’t the girls we were going to hit on there. and you make appearances at the right venues. Within hours of changing our Facebook status to “Partying at the Playboy Mansion” we each had girls we hadn’t spoken to in years leaving us comments and emails with questions like “How did you guys get in the party?” “I heard that it was a private party. I was further solidifying my position as a Rockstar. and I added to our social resume when we attended the party at Playboy Mansion. The value came from the pictures we took. Then why did I trek across the country to go there? Simple. Do you think that created some instant social proof? We never even had to bring it up in a conversation. Sure I had a vague curiosity to party at the Mansion… but I knew it wouldn’t be nearly as fun as some of my rendezvous in Brazil.Social Superstar the place and then using routines and stories in your conversations that further exemplify your high social status. who do you know?” and so on. Pete the Freshman. Pete. Mike. A couple months ago Mike Stoute. or even this past Mansformation Weekend. and the stories we are now able to continually tell about the experience. While I completely agree with this theory… I believe that you should take it a step further and position yourself as a Rockstar. twittered the news. and wrote detailed accounts of the experience that we emailed all of our friends. If you want to be viewed as a Social Rockstar… become one! Elements of the resume 47 . the news of our adventure in the Mansion had already spread like wildfire… and we’re continually pressed and praised about it. Immediately after attending the event. It is a simple theory really.

This is an area you do not want to slack off in. but you’re better off learning from an expert. my pictures from the Mansion create the image of a guy who is invited to high profile-hard to get into parties.php?id=515434783 When I receive your friend request. Once you have a platform for showcasing your “proof” you need to start acquiring it. proof comes from your associations. 48 . If you don’t have an account…GET ONE! You have to view these accounts as your publicity machine.com/profile.mention this manuscript and I will send you a link to an hour long podcast I did with Race de Preist on effectively using Facebook to meet women. For example. Testimonials: What other people are saying about you.facebook. Remember.The Best of TSBMAG. You probably noticed that I used the word perceived in the above definitions. your testimonials. This is because it is more important to create the image of… then to be consistently living it. To a marketer. a list is what creates sales… a list is what spreads word of mouth. Appearances: The places you are perceived to be spending your time. I could write an entire post about the specifics of creating your Facebook or Myspace profile. If you're on Facebook simply send me a friend request: http://www. If you’re new to it Race and Kelly give a couple fantastic tips for getting hot girls to leave comments on your page. and a list is what connects a marketer to his customers. If you couple these pictures with another group of pictures from one other exclusive event… you’ll be perceived as the kind of guy who regularly attends these sorts of events. The testimonials are easy to get… if you’re living the life. You have to view your Facebook friends as a master marketer views his list. and your appearances.COM The number one tool that you have in creating your social resume is your Facebook and Myspace accounts. These two accounts (I prefer Facebook) will be constantly marketing your unique selling points. people will naturally be talking about you and leaving comments on your page. Associations: The people you are perceived to hang out with. Facebook is your list.

http://www.php?af=795295 Remember: Befriend me on Facebook and I will send you an hour long podcast that goes much more into detail on the subject of using Facebook for meeting women and building your social scene.windowshoppingforwomen.Social Superstar http://www.com/profile.facebook.php?id=515434783 49 .com/cmd.

Your Plan: Decide exactly what kind of guy you want to be If you really intend on changing your identity and thriving in a social world. The attitude you present to the world should establish you as a likeable person. but down on paper as well. The attitude and values you possess on the inside will directly relate to the way you are perceived on the outside. You must ask yourself the critical questions: What would my "new self" think in this situation? What would he say? How would he act? And at all times you need live and breathe that identity.The Best of TSBMAG.you must never verbally tell them or act in a way that you feel you are superior to them and will leave them behind. and commitments that your time is extremely limited. passions. This must all be completely fleshed out. It should convey that you are so focused on your own goals. Your attitude should convey the fact that you "are going places" and probably won't be around this scene forever. feeling. acting.COM Chapter 5: The Attitude (liking + scarcity) Your Objective: The objective of your attitude is to establish both liking and scarcity. Building up your inner game will be make you the kind of person people like to be around. you must first be fully aware of how you intend on looking. 50 . thinking. Your attitude should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are a scarce commodity. You need to have a clear vision of your end result if you intend on getting there. not only in your mind. It is important to remember that other people must be lead to believe this on their own. Once you create a well-thought out.description of the person you intend on becoming… you need to keep this vision in your mind as often as possible. and being.

Anchor vibrant energetic states Personally I find most aspects of NLP unhelpful and annoying… but I have found a great use for the idea of anchoring vibrant energetic states. Were you the spelling bee champion in the 2nd great? Did you hit the winning home run in a little league game? Score a hot chick? Tell a funny joke? These are going to form your new identity. You've already learned everything you need to learn from them. no matter how big or small. By creating this list. but actively acting in the way you'd imagine this person to act. And in the future. There is no use re-living them. If you quit something before finishing it… instead of saying "I'm a failure" simply say. As for your mistakes and failures… as they come along. ask yourself "what did I learn" and write down your answer in as a positive statement. Every accomplishment you achieve. Then forget the failure and move on. doubts. and second guessing. you'll need to take with you your previous successes and accomplishments. Focus on your past successes instead of failures In the quest to reinvent your identity you'll need to leave behind the failures. You'll notice that as the list grows. But in order to maintain the qualities that uniquely make you… you. As much as people say "repeat I'm confident over and over" that will not work unless you have some cold hard facts to back it up.Social Superstar Many books will tell you to merely think it enough… and you're subconscious will magically turn you into him. This will be a never ending habit. You need to collect as many of these memories and write them down as vividly and descriptively as possible. All of the negative memories we are going to leave behind. you in essence backing up your claim that you are confident and allowing yourself to act that way without feeling like a fraud. so will your confidences. The positive memories create the foundation of your confidence. when asking yourself how "the new you" would act… you can factor in the quality of perseverance. 51 . "I learned that success comes from perseverance" And then add that to the quality of the kind of guy you want to be if it isn't already listed. It is your job to not only be concentrating your mind on being this person…. will be added to this list.

I played them more often during the point of the work out where my adrenaline was peaked. Build on little successes In the beginning of your identity make over. You should continually be building on every success you have. 52 . making it that much easier to have another success. stomach ache. before leaving the bar instigate a few more conversations. cough.COM I came across this idea by accident. the more likely we are to radiate these traits outward. have a headache. If you are interested in learning more about anchoring check out a book on the subject. the core attribute your looking to build upon is your sense of self worth and confidence. If you have a good conversation with a girl at bar. You need to keep the success momentum going. There are people who claim to be able to anchor specific feelings to a certain touch. My Ipod only had a few songs on it at the time. I tended to bring back that exercise high I used to only experience at the gym. Because certain songs tended to pump me up. For some strange reason the universe loves the concept of momentum… and slumps. run down. Experience Peak Health If self confidence and esteem really come from the inside out. The more vibrant and energetic we feel inside. It is extremely hard to get into state when you're tired. Never be content with just one success. while standing or moving around. then it would go without saying that the one of the most important aspects of self confidence is peak physical health. but I haven’t been able to do that… so I wouldn't want to give you advice that I cannot personally verify as being true. and creating a success journal… but you also need take advantage of the momentum that each success brings. During that period of raised confidence it is important to attempt to achieve another form of success. runny nose.The Best of TSBMAG. I was unconsciously anchoring these songs to a feeling of an adrenaline rush. Whenever you have a success. This is the foundation for everything. We've already talked about focusing on past success. or soreness. I later found that if I listened to these songs. your confidence is increased. Without knowing it. and I used to listen to the same songs over and over while I ran on the treadmill at the gym.

There is a saying "you are what you eat.. Even without the long term health benefits of changing your diet and exercise you will feel an immediate benefit in the amount of energy you possess. every day you find time to get to the gym. and your 53 . The two keys to peak health: 1. Eating healthy Exercise is critical. greasy. If its snowing out. If you find yourself consistently making excuses as to why you missed a workout. Once you break your old pattern you will find that the oatmeal fills you up just as much as the bagel and the Green Tea energizes you more than the coffee. Eating healthy. and unmotivated. pizza. Look at is simply as the way you eat. You'll often feel bloated. the clarity of your mind. you still go. tired. Don't look at it like you're on a diet. exercise provides you with an opportunity to anchor vibrant states to yourself as we spoke of earlier. The trick to starting an exercise and healthful eating habit is to make it a must. Taco Bell. This means there are no excuses. the easier it will become. The more discipline you prove you have to yourself. your level of motivation. Instead of having a Taylor ham and cheese bagel and coffee for breakfast.Social Superstar This is why it is important to treat your body like a temple." This saying has a lot of truth to it. Exercise 2. get in the habit of eating oatmeal and Green tea. If your body is run down from eating badly and not exercising. If you're on vacation… you still go. and Chinese food… your body will respond accordingly. like exercise has to be a must. If you're hung over… you still go. gassy. Also. You must force yourself to change your diet permanently. you will begin to accept this behavior from yourself. If you are consistently filling up on McDonalds. You will find that once you get into a consistent exercise habit your confidence will begin to sky rocket.. your mind will often follow right behind it. Think about the last time you finished off a Big Mac or a big dish of General Tso's… did you feel like you could conquer the world? Did you feel attractive? Many people don't realize that a big source of their depression stems from their lack of physical health.

I soon discovered that I was often depressed and felt very discouraged with myself." 54 . These benefits carry over into all areas of your life. plucking my eyebrows. in dirty clothes.COM increased pride in yourself discipline. This will keep you motivated and inspired. tanning. I used to have the mentality that if I'm not going to see anyone. At first I never understood why they bothered. and would feel like that was all I was. or keeping up my appearance the day's I was working. But this was a horrible mentality to have. In the chapter on making yourself more attractive I gave many hints on how you can increase your physical attractiveness. I would look in the mirror and see a scruffy. unkempt guy. they would wash up. what is the point of shaving. What I noticed though was that a couple of my Spanish employees would come to work every day looking sharp. and change back into their nice clothes before heading home. or wearing nice clothes. they would change into their work clothes. When we want to buy something we want a voice appears in our head saying "no you can't afford that" or "shouldn't you buy something more useful?" When we want to talk to a girl or apply for a job a voice in our head says "don't. doing my hair. What I want you to get out of this section is that it is always important to look and feel your best. Say yes to yourself As children we so often hear the word "no" or "you can't" that we grow up inflicting ourselves with these words. Then once they got to work. This is how they separated themselves from their job. even when no one is watching. Because my job entailed me to where old painter's clothes and often find myself covered in paint… I would often decide that it wasn't worth shaving. Well Dressed I discovered this principle when I was working as a paint contractor. fixing my hair nice. in nice clothes. trimming my nose hairs. Stay Well Groomed. But then I came to understand that this was how they kept their dignity. Because the one and only person you really need to impress is yourself. You need to look in the mirror and be proud of how you come across.The Best of TSBMAG. Later in the day when it was time to leave.

or one beautiful women to fall in love with you. It means going for broke. for some guys it fantasy football. or apply yourself. Do you really enjoy playing World of Warcraft 7 hours a day… or is it easier than admitting to yourself that you're scared to talk to girls. It also means eliminating your crutches…. or one professor to see your hidden brilliance in a subject. some guys its porn. Order whatever it is you want on the menu regardless of price. It will reshape the way you live your life. If you didn't have yourself in your ear telling you "no" how many more girls would you have approached? How many more classes would you have taken? Jobs applied for? Friends made? Even if you only achieved a fraction of the extra dreams you went for. It means cutting off your "booty call" and finding a girl that inspires you. Whatever it is that we want we are often the first person to talk ourselves out of it. how much would this have improved your life? It only takes one great employer to give you a chance despite your shoddy resume. Get in the habit of allowing yourself to have the things you want. This will set precedence. 55 .. Eliminate Your Crutch/Burn Your Ships To fully develop unstoppable inner game and the winning attitude it is necessary to burn our ships and get rid of our crutches. We tell ourselves all of the same excuses that our parents told us. or our teachers or relatives told us." "You can get it next year" How can you ever get what you really want if you are your own biggest obstacle in achieving it? The step to reversing this is to practice saying yes to yourself. For some guys their crutch is video games. This means that quitting a dead end part time job and focusing 100% on your dream.Social Superstar We are unconsciously embedding the word no into our minds. They are the place that we crawl back to avoid facing defeat in other areas. Crutches are things that we use to avoid reality. Apply for a job that you have no qualifications for. "You're too young" "You only wind up breaking it" "You'll hurt yourself" "You'll lose it" "You have to be fair" "You can't afford it. and bam your life is changed. While there is nothing wrong with having a hobby… the problem arises when you hide yourself in your hobby.

close friends. but it makes your life exciting. You won't feel trapped. If you are trying to conquer shyness. Say something that surprises you.COM The hardest thing I ever had to do a few years back was quit the restaurant I was working in. How do you achieve this? This push yourself one step further every day. Things won't get boring. At the time. and then burn them. It is important that you push yourself past at least one comfort zone daily. You'll begin to look forward to each day as you'll find yourself continually surprising yourself. The job provided me with a solid wad of cash every week. Not only does this help you grow as a person. If you're working on a project. and unlimited females to interact with and date. make an effort to initiate one more conversation every day. Quitting the job not only meant burning my ships (as the job provided me with money. run an extra minute. If you're going to the gym. I knew deep inside that if I kept working there I would stay comfortable and never achieve my goals of running a successful business or publishing a book.The Best of TSBMAG. or got frustrated with the screenplay I was writing. think outside the box. All was always good there. add a bit more resistance. Life will no longer seem repetitive. it is just important that you push yourself past it daily. Yet. It doesn't matter what your comfort zone is any area. You have to find out what your ships and crutches are. and dates) but it also meant eliminating my crutch.. If you don't have the opportunity to initiate an extra conversation. Try something zany even if it doesn't work this time it will train your mind to look for new ways of doing things. whenever I experienced a set back at the real estate agency I was working at. crank out an extra rep or two. Push yourself past your comfort zone daily Look at yourself like a rubber band. Embrace Your Passions 56 . I would head over to the restaurant and drink with my buddies. then say something unexpected in one of the conversations you are involved in. friends. The objective is to stretch yourself into the largest and greatest rubber band of all time.

they'll decide something completely different. but plant the seed of passion in your mind. What sparks you? Most people think if they won that kind of money that they would want to retire on a beach somewhere… but often when they really think of it. and then envision yourself in different scenarios. unproductive life. or travel the world. You might find that hour becomes your most cherished of the day. this freedom. If you want to travel the world… pick one place right now and set a goal to visit it. Sure. withdrawn. Spend an hour every night writing. Don't jump at the first thought that comes into your mind. Maybe they decide they want to write children's books. 57 . you might not be able to do it in the same capacity now. Let it power you. When you find something that drives you… go with it. Really dwell on it. You'll often find that achieving life goals and dreams doesn't cost nearly as much as you think. How do you find your passion? Think to yourself "what would I be doing if I suddenly won $150 million in the lottery. then you're letting yourself down. the more it shows on the outside. or volunteer for worthy causes. This is not the case. In a later chapter I have reproduced that exercise for you. You are the only judge of what is important for you. or train for the Olympics. or write music. If you don't live up to your own standards. energizing reason to get out of bed every morning does amazing things for your self esteem. Let it drive you. In Tim Ferriss's book The Four Hour Work Week he gives an exercise called Dreamlining which allows you to see approximately how much money you will need to make to finance your dreams. Once you visit that place. But in this section I just want to remind you that the more inspired you are on the inside. set a goal to visit another place. or open a bar where they know everyone. or paint. The trick is to find whatever you would do if time and money were not an object and do it now. Having a solid. If you would write children's books… start writing one now. imagine you have this money. Really get inside your mind.Social Superstar I will go more into detail about embracing your passions in the section on being an interesting person. Only Seek Approval from Yourself Many people misinterpret the advice to "not care what people think" to be advice recommending living a slovenly.

The first and foremost person you need to please is yourself. It is simply advice to live life on your terms and not let the whims of the masses affect your ability to make decisions.The Best of TSBMAG. This is not advice to be selfish. And the more you try to please everyone.COM You can't please everyone. 58 . the more you wind up pleasing no one.

If they don't like you. The second weapon of influence you must use is that of scarcity.Social Superstar Chapter 5: Be Captivating (liking + scarcity + authority) Your Objective: In order to be interesting.but decided that cool is subjective and people might not understand it as a standalone definition. If you want to be captivating. above all you must be likeable. Looking cool is a good way to get people to take notice. The final ingredient to being captivating is possessing a sense of authority. Your Plan: I was originally going to call this chapter. And most importantly they want someone to look up to. your influence over them will run thin… and you will also not enjoy yourself around them nearly as much. They are most fascinated and attached to what they can't have. But looking cool doesn’t make you cool. They want to be led. People are like sheep.Be Cool. They want to be told what to do. And how do you demonstrate that you are cool? Be interesting! 59 . You must get other people to like you. scarcity. and authority. These weapons are liking.the kind of person that people want to be around. People get bored and uninterested in what is always around. which ultimately you must do to demonstrate that you are cool. What makes someone cool? Well everything we talked about in the previous chapter “Look the Part” definitely plays a huge part in appearing cool.you must convey three weapons of influence. captivating or cool.

COM Wallflowers are rarely cool. Some people choose playing Halo 3. While they all can be fun and rewarding… how interesting do these hobbies make you appear to other people? What if your hobbies included: Playing in a cover band. So how do you “be interesting” you ask? Here are some traits of interesting people that we will explore further: Interesting hobbies Interesting profession Contradictory character traits The dirty little secret Fearless Says less than necessary No where you’re going Never appear too perfect Have interesting hobbies Out of all of the traits. this is the easiest to immediately implement. Why? Because as pretty as they can be… they’re usually like talking to a wall. What we choose to make our hobbies is our choice. If you want to be a Social Superstar it is crucial that you become the most interesting person in the room. world travel. or golf as a hobby. rock climbing. hacking into highly secured computer networks. or race car driving? Do you think other people would take a tad bit more interest in you? 60 . We can choose anything. There just doesn’t seem to be anything deeper than the pretty exterior. snowboarding. fantasy football. tango dancing. While devouring interesting facts and storing them away for appropriate times can make you sound interesting and does play a small part in a Social Superstar repertoire…it is more important that you be interesting. surfing.The Best of TSBMAG. collecting comic books. Some people will take this the wrong way and think they have to load up on useless facts and knowledge… ala Mystery’s “Did you know fish cough?” routine. World of Warcraft. volunteer relief aid work.

Your hobbies give other people the ability to make a snapshot judgment of your personality traits. Merely going through the motions of rock climbing. It is your choice to pursue that hobby which makes you interesting. You may ask what is more interesting about surfing than golf. You need to develop passion for these things. or traveling the world? Maybe words like: Adventurous Passionate 61 . How many girls admire your dedication to World of Warcraft? How many of those same girls would admire your dedication to volunteering to perform relief work after various catastrophes? What you choose to do with your free time says more about you then anything that comes out of your mouth. or flying around the world is not enough. But there is something unique and interesting about the type of guy who chooses to spend his free time rock climbing while his friends are sitting in front of a computer playing video games. This is a guy who marches to the beat of a different drummer. This is where the value of this lesson comes in. or struggling to surf. what personality traits do you associate with someone who spends their free time surfing. Are you starting to get the idea? What you choose to make your hobby tells other people a lot about your personality. You need to develop a passion for them that radiates from within your core being. It’s not. And most people are compelled to know why? How many people are genuinely curious as to why you spend your free time shuffling around your fantasy football roster? Not many I would assume. It is actually pretty boring to watch. A guy who chooses to learn and compete in tango dancing competitions is an oddity. This is a guy who goes against the grain. What would personality traits would most people attach to someone whose hobby was following major league sports or playing video games or golf? Now. playing in a cover band. The hobby itself is not what makes you interesting. There is nothing fundamentally fascinating about rock climbing.Social Superstar Your immediate reaction might be to say that simply faking an interest in a hobby is enough.

Most people are confined to the day to day activities that make up their comfort zone. exciting. rock star? Who says you can’t be? In our times it is possible to make a hobby out of any possible thing you may have an interest in. The best way to find out the potential of turning one of your childhood dreams into a current hobby is to begin by searching around the internet. and interesting hobbies is not as hard as it may seem. Are you a sheep? 62 . you can search meetup. Finding new. It is their drive. determination.com for groups in your area. a space explorer.COM Free spirited Thrill seeking Interesting people are often associated with these sorts of words. These new acquaintances might open your eyes to entirely new horizons.The Best of TSBMAG. They are a rare commodity in a world where most people act like mindless sheep following along with the herd. cave dweller. It is amazing what you find when you begin to step outside of your comfort zone. you can run a Yahoo Groups or Google Groups search and see if there is already a group of people discussing it. My first recommendation is to choose a few things that you have a genuine interest in. You can run a general Google search and see what comes up. computer hacker. This is what makes these “interesting” people so extraordinary. And even better. and ability to live life outside the comfort zone that is so fascinating to us. Take some time for a moment and think about the kind of words people would use to describe you. The wonderful thing about entering one of these groups is that it presents you with an opportunity to meet new and exciting people that you normally would not have come in contact with. or you can visit specialized travel sites to see what kind of adventure travel they offer. In the late Randy Pausch’s Last Lecture he talks about rediscovering your childhood dreams as a way to bringing fulfillment to your life. What were some of your childhood dreams you gave up on? Did you want to be an archeologist like Indiana Jones. you’re likely to find a group of people that have made a hobby out of the same exact thing to share experiences with.

Some people call this “developing character. If you really want a Ferrari. For now. If you pick a hobby that continually challenges you and forces you to continually dig deep inside to persist… you will grow as a person. etc.) in that order.). and doing (visiting Thailand. If you have difficulty identifying what you want in some categories.let alone climb to the top of Mount Everest. You will be looked as sort of an authoritative figure.). There is a certain amount of unsaid respect and admiration for the man or woman who does these things. as most will.6 months and 12 months. but it will also help you understand the means it will take to achieve your dreams. etc. be fluent in Chinese. Most people quit a fitness routine a few weeks after beginning. the dream will be fame. For some.” No matter what name you give it the results are the same. Do not limit yourself. but not limited to. being (be a great cook. All people have their vices and 63 . Dreamlining In Tim Ferriss's brilliant book "The Four Hour Work Week" he gives a phenomenal exercise that will not only help you develop your passion.and list up to five things you dream of having (including. This is an exercise in reversing repression. consider what you hate or fear in each and write down the opposite. etc. racing ostriches. Be sure not to judge or fool yourself. car. And most people don’t travel out of their state – let alone backpack across South East Asia. don't put down solving world hunger out of guilt.” Others will call it “maturity. and do not concern yourself with how these things will be accomplished. clothing. tracing your roots overseas. What would you do if there was no way you could fail? If you were 10 times smarter than the rest of the world Create two timelines. I am going to take the next section directly from Tim Ferriss's book and urge you follow this advice and create your dreamlines. You will seem to possess a wisdom normally reserved for wise old men.Social Superstar There are more benefits to exploring a new and exciting hobby other than being perceived as interesting. material wants: house. its unimportant. for others fortune or prestige. The sad truth is that most people don’t even finish a book that they startlet alone persist long enough to make it to the finals of a surf competition in Hawaii.

but this column is just a temporary spot for "doing" actions.think about if for a few minutes. Repeat the process with the 12 month timeline if desired. most people have a lot of trouble coming up with the defined dreams they're being held from. Here are a few examples: Great cook = make Christmas dinner without help Fluent in Chinese = have a five minute conversation with a Chinese coworker What are the four dreams that would change it all? Using the six month timeline. if you had $100 million in the bank? b) What would make you excited to wake up in the morning to another day? Don't rush. day to day. In that case.The Best of TSBMAG. consider these questions: a) What would you do. If something will improve your feeling of self worth. If still blocked. People find it easier brainstorm "being" first. Drawing a blank? For all their bitching about what's holding them back. put it down. star or otherwise highlight the four most exciting and/or important dreams from all the columns. 64 . Identify an action that would characterize this state of being or task that would mean you have achieved it. fill in the five "doing" spots with the following: • • • • • One place to visit One thing to do before you die (memory of a lifetime One thing to do daily One thing to do weekly One thing you've always wanted to learn What does "being" entail doing? Convert each "being" into a "doing" to make it actionable. This is particularly true with the "doing" category.COM insecurities.

I would never recommend choosing a profession simply because it sounds glamorous. In fact. I'm not a believer in long-term planning and far-off goals. to outline every step from start to finish. You are much more than your occupation. But why not choose a profession that genuinely interests you? Chances are if it genuinely interests you… it probably is interesting to other people as well. For the continuation of this exercise pick up a copy of "The Four Hour Work Week" or visit fourhourworkweek. And very few jobs are glamorous. First. CIA agent. well-defined actions-for now. 65 .” or “I’m tech support. therefore.Social Superstar Determine three steps for each of the four dreams in just the six month timeline and take the first steps now. Far too many people let their jobs define who they are as a person.com Have an Interesting Profession This one is a lot more difficult to control than finding an interesting hobby. and living like a superstar. If you fall into the unglamorous and mundane… do not be defined by your work. Do it now. or astronaut. But for the rest of us. This is a good introduction to dreamlining and illustrates how it can create the needed momentum to set you on the right direction towards achieving your life goals. Define three steps for each dream that will get you closer to its actualization. The truth is we all have to earn a living. CEO of a fortune 500 company.” or “I’m a real estate agent. we are cutting ourselves short. This happens after years of naming your current profession when asked “what do you do?” If you say “I’m a painter. The objective of this exercise isn't. Identifying yourself with your job is fine if you’re a rock star. but to define the end goal. complete the three actions in the "now" column. Each should be simple enough to do in five minutes or less. Set actions-simple. actor. The variable change too much and in-the future distance becomes an excuse for postponing action. Once you have three steps for each of the four goals. If not rachet it down. the required vehicle to achieve them and build momentum with critical first steps.” or name any other job too many times you begin to identify yourself with your job. tomorrow and the day after. let's focus on those critical first steps. I generally set 3-month and six month dreamlines.

I would concentrate more on finding a job that you’re passionate about rather than choosing a job strictly for conversation pieces. In the pickup/seduction community there is a lot of talk about demonstrating higher value. music. I would spend more energy on finding interesting hobbies. or television Airline pilot Reporter (for legitimate magazine or newspaper) Public Speaker These are just few of the better paying jobs. I would recommend at the very least finding a job that you’re passionate about. mundane. that will shine through. street artist… and so on. Passion is not only contagious. Interesting Skills A social superstar has the keen ability to keep everyone in the room focused on him. If you’re starting from scratch and a curious about some examples of interesting jobs. if you are truly passionate about it. Even if the job sounds like the most boring job on the planet. Do not kid yourself into believing that you don’t. If you've follow the advice laid out above in regards to discovering your passions and creating hobbies 66 . I’ve made a short list of examples below: • • • • • • • FBI Agent Firefighter Archeologist Any job in film. but it is a vehicle for putting your charisma and enthusiasm on display. There are countless examples of interesting lower paying jobs out there like tour guide.The Best of TSBMAG. skydiving instructor. So while the job itself might not be glamorous… you will appear glamorous performing it. death trap of job… you have options.COM I could spend fifty pages trying to talk you into following your dream profession and why it is completely possible that you attain it… but that is beyond the scope of this book. I simply want to point out the fact that if you’re in a boring. Hobbies tell more about you anyway… because they are what you choose to do on your free time.

and never revealed the secret of how they accomplished it until years later. My two friends Daryl and Kevin pulled this off for years in college without anyone ever catching onto it. As with all of the different skills I will list. bars. Kevin would subtly scratch his nose when Daryl sniffed the right card. While everyone's attention was on Daryl. Daryl would notice Kevin scratching his nose. show it to everyone in the room and then put it back in the row of 7 cards. He would then lay out 7 cards on a table or floor.Social Superstar around them. I saw Daryl perform the trick countless times and no one ever figured it out. The Sniffing Card Trick This trick requires a silent partner. When Daryl came back to the room he would begin sniffing each card. He would sell the trick well by really smelling the cards and acting as if he was looking for a clue on the card. Daryl would leave the room while the person chose the card. I am going to list this trick along with several other types of skills and routines you can learn to captivate an audience. realize that was the card. I'm not 67 . Magic tricks worked for Mystery because he was genuinely passionate about magic. Other Magic Tricks I have never been big on magic tricks. and gathering that will make you stand out from the crowd. He would then invite someone to take part in the trick. Daryl would tell the person to pick out one of the cards. and eventually choose the right card. For these guys. For some guys it takes awhile to fully integrate themselves into a new hobby or passion to the point that they feel it will benefit them in social gatherings. but with the popularity behind them do to legendary pick up artist Mystery. you will most likely already be developing some interesting traits and skills that are all your own. continue his performance for a bit. In my college days I had two good friends Daryl and Kevin who mastered one simple card trick that had audiences captivated every time they performed it. it is important to pick skills that are congruent with your personality. there must be a place for them in this book. Basically Daryl would pull out a deck of cards and shuffle them around for a bit. It was a trick that they worked together on. I suggest taking the advice of some of the most popular dating coaches and gurus and learn some routines that you can bust out at parties.

Play to their egos. Most cover bands are just looking to build a following. If you believe that magic tricks are something that you would like to add to your repertoire of skills you can find some videos of a few good ones on our companion site.penguinmagic. If they sense that you're the kind of guy who rolls with a large entourage.The Best of TSBMAG. introduce them to some of your hot female friends. all swooning over the shitty cover band up on stage.COM saying that you have to have a desire to be a magician to perform magic tricks. The long haired. John Bon Jovi wanna be seems to have his pick of the litter tonight. There is also a wonderful resource for guys looking to use magic to improve their game called PUMA Skills. and men want to be friends with. During one of the set breaks you start bullshitting with the band. Learn to Play or Sing one song You're at a bar." If you are serious about learning magic and want to try your skills with some more professional tricks you can go to www. make up some bullshit about "leaving town. If the band doesn't seem to be biting. Think Jessie's Girl. maybe a round of shots. and how much you miss being up on stage.tsbmag.com and purchase some of the tricks that the pros use on stage.tsbmag. co-workers.tsbmag. You casually mention how you sing "insert song you've practiced a million times" really well. and boat loads of hotties. They 68 . buy them all a drink. in hopes that you will encourage your crew to be their new groupies. The trick to this is to learn one song that most cover bands will know… and love to play. www. which will allow them to charge more money for their appearances. your birthday. its jampacked with friends. they will try to appease you.. but you must have some real interest in the subject matter.com/2006/10/29/demonstrate-higher-value-withlevitation-trick/ You can also view more magic trick videos by going to Youtube and searching "magic tricks.. The kind of guy women want to fuck.com/2006/10/31/demonstrate-higher-value-withtorn-card-trick/ http://www. just getting over a really bad break up…" and 5 out of 10 times the band will invite you on stage to sing the song. You're a fun social guy though.com http://www.

Practice it often. Anybody with a little patience can spend a few days perfecting one song on the guitar or piano. which is a pleasant characteristic of a super star." You'll come off as modest. and make you seem just that much more naturally cool. some people will scream for you to play another song. You are not to tell anyone about your ability to sing. This means that you have to spend a fair amount of time perfecting this one song. When the party rolls around feel free to strum away. 69 . But you don't have to get really good. There is no reason you both can't share the stage for a moment. Video tape yourself and fine tune your body language and how you carry yourself on stage. Even throw in a line like "I'd play all night… but that wouldn't be fun for anyone else. It is important to master the one that comes most naturally to you. You also need to have a good stage presence. Sure. Make it the staple of your karaoke choices. Which really comes down to mastering a few chords. The first criterion for this is that you have a decent voice and a good sense of rhythm. Sometimes parties will have stray guitars or pianos. with your audience wanting more! The Superstar's Guide to Being Funny There are many different types of humor. When you get on stage to kick ass with the band… it is should come as total shock… which will amplify the effect. and some party goer will wow everyone with his rendition of chop sticks from Big. Best of all… you leave the social encounter on a high note. If you get up on stage.Social Superstar want to be social superstars too. You just have to get really good at playing one song. Just find one of your more talented friends or family members to teach you the song. This same idea can be applied to musical instruments as well. you best rock the house. Why not blow them away with something really good? Most people study for years to get really good at the guitar. Just simply refuse… tell them you don't want to steal the thunder from the party. and record it so that you can listen and fine tune. Practice in front of a mirror.

A character needs a trademark or point of view that does not change. humor comes much more easily for him. That being said. you can almost feel what his reaction will be before he makes it. Because Vince Vaughn has really mastered this character. Humor cannot be forced or it's uncomfortable. And often times you'll find yourself laughing before he's said anything. With it. and put it out at appropriate times. Without a character.The Best of TSBMAG. When he's responding to a question. Everyone and I mean everyone loves being around someone that consistently makes them laugh. or there tends to be a lot of uncomfortable silences after you deliver your lines… stop! You'll have an easier time just being the cool serious guy… then the unfunny jokester. you can get laughs simply be being yourself. The humor actually flows more from the 70 . or making an observation on something he's witnessing. he just has to ask himself what would "a smart ass" say? It is important if you want to be funny that you have a character and that you stick with the character.COM Being funny is not a prerequisite for a social superstar (Being fun to be around is though. You begin to expect a certain reaction. Laughing feels good. People hate bad comedy. Let's use Vince Vaughn as an example. He has developed the character of "smart ass. Humor is a polarizing thing… while being funny can make you extremely popular… trying to be funny when you're not can crush your social dreams. you're simply a recite of jokes." When you're watching one of his movies or listening to him speak in an interview. you can learn to recognize it.) The funnier you are. While I don't think that spur of the moment jokes can be taught to someone who doesn't naturally think that way." If you think about the funniest performers most of them have at least one memorable character who makes you laugh before he even says anything… because you already know what his reaction will be. Develop a character "Humor doesn't go into a character is comes out of him. I do think that if you learn a little bit about humor. there is a lot of arguments over whether or not comedy can be taught. If you sense that the people around you don't respond to your jokes. the easier it will be to infiltrate new social circles. Think about the people you most enjoy spending time with… more than likely they will be the people that you laugh the most around.

My whole character was the arrogant-what's in it for me. You can't go into character. the humor will come with how the character is interacting with the world." I based the humor off of Vince Vaughn.Social Superstar character. do it for a little while. The ones David DeAngelo mentioned above are particularly good for dealing with women. The humor comes from your characters interaction with the world. For many years I developed the character of "daddy. the straight man The guy who only wants to know what's in it for him A high maintenance chick The ultimate authority and commentator on wussy guys Imitating the women you're with Becoming devil's advocate and promoting bad behavior She needs adult supervision As you can see that by merely immersing yourself in any of these characters. Most funny people are not trying to be funny. the interactions. You will probably find that they have a standard character that they have become. Here are some roles that David DeAngelo recommends trying out or testing… The I'm superior to you character An assumed or fake position of authority The character of the victim of her seduction The cold guy.humor will naturally flow out of it. get a laugh… then leave it. And they're not seeking approval. Think about the funniest people you know. Or your character's interaction with your thoughts.jerk. If you keep trying to see if your audience likes it will probably backfire on you. It won't work if you approach it tentatively and try it… it will actually backfire. If you can get the character down. No 71 . They are actually "being" the character. and responses than from the jokes. In order to make this concept work you must believe it and act congruently. Or your characters interaction with another person. The character is where 90% of the humor flows from. especially if they can tell you're trying to use it to get their approval. I was able to make that character work really well. Because once you "nail" the character. then all of the funny stuff starts taking care of itself.

Louie CK. If this is your type… maybe you can make yourself interesting by doing volunteer work with the humane society. 72 ." Best recourses to learn humor Watching standup comedy. And they’ll likely try to push you along into one. Also pay attention to the connections he makes. lots of technical gadgets like a Blackberry. Read Books. For instance. Pay attention to his delivery. Learn to see the world through his eyes. But your best bet is to head out often to the local theatre or club and watch some standup comedy live. Cocky comedy is the best type of humor for attracting women. and how people react to them. It is easy to fall into this trap when building an image. Watching Movies. Some guys need to understand things at a greater level before implementing something. I'm not a firm believer that books can teach you how to be funny. If you're one of those guys pick up the book "Comedy Writing Secrets. exhibiting only one facet: the alpha jock. allowing funny sarcastic lines to flow out of you. you have to know fundamental people skills so that you are "liked.are you picturing formal suits and furrowed forehead? Long hours. or playing in a blues band on weekends." Cocky Comedy Course: David DeAngelo's cocky comedy course is a brilliant way to learn the art of cocky comedy. This allows you to observe the reactions of those around you. It lets you observe the power of delivery and timing. But they can teach you the underlying principles of what makes people laugh. and you'll begin thinking like him. because people love to classify people into types. the well situated power investment banker. I've found that watching Vince Vaughn movies really helped me develop my sarcastic sense of humor. Some of the comedians you might want to study are Bill Burr. Have Contradictory Character Traits No one is less compelling than a person in life who acts like a million other characters you’ve encountered. the tortured musician. that’s a good start for a character.The Best of TSBMAG.COM matter what character you choose. and a whole lot of excess cash? Well. but a social superstar needs to transcend a type. the brainiac. This 6 CD set will leave you with more material than you can begin to use.

When you build an image. It is a completely refreshing change of pace. Your observer should experience the tension. These are all contradictions of character. The innocent girl had sex with a stranger. television. A fascinating element of human nature is that we all possess contrasting traits. We all carry with us histories. A great seducer does the same thing. each of our bundles distinctively different from anyone else’s. These contrasts provide endless opportunity to make yourself more complex. or fact about themselves that is completely contradictory to the image they have put forward thus far. There is nothing in life that kills interest more than predictability. He does this by leading his target in one direction. The ones that intrigue us most don’t come off as stereotypes or clichés. and then the seducer blind sides the target with an action. To understand more. People love being swerved when they least expect it. The most interesting characters in movies. other times greatly conflicting. The dedicated business man had a thousand dollar a week coke habit. our experiences. They slowly reveal things about themselves that keep us wondering what we will find out next. And there is nothing in life that peaks interest more than a swerve just when we thought we had something or someone all figured out. The responsible teacher has fucked a hooker. ADVANCED: use with caution The Dirty Little Secret People love surprises. or books are those who possess depth. they seep into your being. The three dimensional ones. They make us want to know more.Social Superstar These sorts of distinctions make you different from any other person that might fall into this type. sometimes subtle. They make us feel as if we’ve missed something all along. letting the target feel like they have him all figured out. and our memories. 73 . The best contrasts are so seamlessly sewn with your characterization that they’re not easy to spot. The alpha male fucked a guy. story. And they fascinate us. And that feeling is invigorating. This means the nice guy admits he got rough with his last girlfriend. not be spotting contrasts like stop signs along the road. not a type but a real person. explore the specific and unique details that will make you more complex.

But in their mind they were captivated by him. But suddenly he was a little more complex. although not proud of the indecent. I am not saying to go out and hit your girlfriend. What I am saying though is don’t hide what is there. and then you drop the bomb. Little did he know. and minors? These people are taboo. He was one of the most laid back. His ex girlfriend learned it a year into the relationship. By introducing danger to your target you will make them feel alive. And in the end desire always wins out over reason. easy going guys. I had a job in a restaurant once. But it was enough to bruise her eye. And you wait until that point where you sense they feel they have you figured out. I was friendly with many of the girls there and talked open and honestly about my sexual experiences. It makes us feel alive. He also happened to have a fuse that would occasionally go off. So by the time the story had come out. I had a friend back in college. You have to build rapport with your target. She proceeded to tell everyone in arm’s length about what happened. laid back guy. Not many people knew this side of him. or fuck a minor. I told 74 . they all though they had him figured out. continues years later to tell the story of that relationship to girls he meets. They had known him for years as a nice. cousins. My friend. nor do anything other socially unacceptable behavior. And they will surrender to you for it. where he would lose his temper completely. How many of our fantasies involve our teachers.COM By nature we want what we are not supposed to have. You have to allow them to see all of your positive. My friend thought is social life was over on campus. He was dangerous. He was socially unacceptable. He literally had girls throwing themselves at him. They got into a fight and he hit her just once. single moms. Now at the right moment you have to disclose this information.The Best of TSBMAG. He says of all the girls he told not one stopped seeing him. prostitutes. and have her end the relationship. friend’s girlfriends. virtuous characteristics. The fact that they shouldn’t do it only made them want to do it more. They are dangerous. it had just begun. But danger is seductive. He was now taboo. you could ever meet. But the girls didn’t care. They are frowned upon. lesbians. Sure when they talked about him to their friends they acted as if they disapproved of him. I’m sure if you did deep enough into your past you can find something you’ve done that is a little taboo. My friend didn’t have to do all of this because all of these girls knew him previously.

our fear of ruining our reputation. our fear of making a mistake. We are held back by our fear of losing our job.Social Superstar them about my love of Asian massage parlors. Creating a little bit of an edge for yourself will work wonders for your sex appeal. The dirty little secret is a great way to make you more desirable to a girl. Most fear stems from our need for approval. What would your personality be like if you weren’t governed by all of these fears? If you take a look at the short list of our major fears… you’ll find that not one of them is life threatening. Live a fearless existence. Did it stop me from fucking half the waitresses there? Hell no. Most people are held back by various forms of fear. And not one of them ever even made me where a condom. In fact. How refreshing is it when we meet someone who isn’t controlled by these fears? Women are attracted to bad boys. Most people are insecure. Most of us are working a job we hate. In the average guy. Feel the fear. then do it anyway. our fear of being laughed at. This is especially true if you are a naturally nice wholesome guy. Appear Fearless You’re fearless. Most of our fears are completely unwarranted. Most people suffer some form of anxiety disorder. because bad boys provide an adrenaline rush that the average guy does not. This is 75 . our fear of rejection. Although the charge was bullshit. most of our major fears are solely based on what thoughts someone else will have about us. have given up our dreams… because we are afraid of making the wrong decision. lonely or in a shitty relationship. How ridiculous does that sound when you really think about it? 90% of the decisions that you make are influenced by your need for approval. If you want to stand out in a crowd. I have a friend with an assault charge on his record. How many stopped him. a woman sees a reflection of most of her fears and insecurities. You guessed it. our fear of going broke. none.my friend still found it morally necessary to tell every girl he was with afterwards about the charge right before he would sleep with them for the first time. and we’re not even afraid of the consequences of the wrong decision… We are afraid of what people will say about us… what people will think about us.

I am going to repeat a challenge that I laid out to you during our 31 Days to Better Game series last July. 76 . The difference is that the bad boys. What was so iconic about a person like John F Kennedy was that he always appeared so cool. airplanes… and the list goes on. depriving themselves of true happiness.COM why the average guy becomes her friend. Because they can sit and talk and wallow in their fears and insecurities together. no matter what the situation was. confrontation. he never showed eve one ounce of fear. this might just be the hardest advice you will ever receive: You need to feel the fear. Whether the president was fending off missile crisis. cold calling. fighting for civil rights. But the fact is. natural disasters. The bad boy makes her forget all about her fears and insecurities.The Best of TSBMAG. public speaking. What is a fearless existence? A fearless existence is one that is not governed by the illogical fears that most people hang onto their entire life. and collective. the ocean. and do it anyway. He takes her into his fearless existence. terrorism. relationships. poverty. While it may seem difficult to "be fearless" it is not nearly as difficult to appear fearless. He realizes that short of death or serious injury… life goes on after 99. heights. Most human beings go through their daily existence terrified. Appearing fearless is really the objective. People like their heroes and superstars to possess the traits and characteristics they most wish they had themselves. cold approaching. some people are scared of social gatherings. Some people are terrified of death. They find these characters exhilarating because they can't figure out how they can be so fearless. Chances are you probably suffer from quite a few of those fears yourself. If you do. calm. and the superstars of this world… overcome their fears in the face of the public.9% of the situations you enter into. or bedding Marilyn Monroe. the heroes. no one is inherently fearless. A Superstar does not confine himself to these fears.

Say Less Than Necessary The 4th Law of Power states: When you are trying to impress people with words. the more common you appear. Do you want to call out of work and go the beach? Do it! Do you want to tell the counter girl at the bank that she’s sexy as hell? Do it! Do you want to finally change the style of your haircut? Jump out a plane? Get a tattoo? Have sex with a stranger? Do whatever the fuck you want! Whenever the fuck you want! Do this for just 2 days and experience the thrill of being fearless. open-ended. approach who you feel like approaching. tell someone who has pissed you off to “fuck off. You can often gain the control in a conversation by merely giving short answers and long pauses…simply because it will put the other person on the defensive. Even if you are saying something banal. the more likely you are to say something foolish. They find it necessary to know what you are thinking. the more interesting you will appear. After the two days you can go back to worrying about what people think. the more you say.Social Superstar Live the next two days of your life completely fearless. Human beings are curious creatures. If you have a fear of public speaking… go to a Toastmaster's meeting and give a five minute speech to a group of strangers. Just for the next two days. 77 . say what you feel like saying. If you have a fear of flying… parachute out of an airplane.” do exactly what you want to do. The more you say. they will continue to try to interpret and explain you. As long as you put up a guard by carefully controlling what you reveal. They'll go home trying to figure out what happened in the conversation. it will seem original if you make it vague. and they'll quickly try to fill the silence by nervously jumping in with comments that reveal valuable information about them and their weaknesses. and sphinxlike. An extremely effective way to break through your fears is to tackle a really big one immediately. trivial reason is holding you back. You get my point. and the less in control. or how you appear. Powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. and the more time they spend pondering. or whatever other insignificant.

or something that could be used against you. 78 . the consequences will linger on long after the pleasure has subsided. The more time she spends trying to figure you out. The social superstar lives on his own terms and knows exactly what he wants out of life. If you don't make it a habit of controlling the words that come out of your mouth. As much satisfaction you might get from an uncontrolled outburst." but you've just given away your greatest bargaining tool. This also relates to a lot of the advice I give out regarding expressing your feelings toward a girl. This is not noble… it is vain and reeks of self centeredness. Once she knows how deeply you feel… the interest begins to diminish. I used to spend way too much time thinking about what other people were thinking about me. Shyness is not interesting. In fact. Know Where You're Going Most people wander through life aimlessly. I know because I used to be one. This is especially important when you are out drinking. If you want to be a social superstar you must not let others goad you into saying something that you will come to regret. Shy people like to think of themselves as noble… but in fact they are the most self indulgent people there are. Do not take this as an excuse to be shy or introverted. They can't believe that he actually has it all figured out. Not the social superstar. you cannot take them back. you will wind up with a habit of letting your mouth write checks you can't cash. This simple concept intrigues people. shyness is a sign of insecurity. And far from interesting. but it can also be dangerous for placing yourself into a corner later on. Yes. I've been accused of being heartless. Revealing too much not only serves to diminish the interest people have in you. as everything you've worked for could be ruined by one night of diarrhea of the mouth. or not out for love… but the truth is.The Best of TSBMAG. I've long figured out that the less you say to a girl. Once words are out. If you have a low tolerance for alcohol. This means you also must learn to handle your temper under pressure or when angry. and carefully choosing your words. I always recommend saying the bare minimum. be sure to watch your consumption.COM Saying less in a conversation also helps you avoid saying something that will make you look foolish. you may be tempted to blurt out "I love you. the more interesting you appear to her. They look for other people to guide them and show them direction. In the heat of the moment. the more value she's invested in you. there is a difference from being shy.

where you want to go?" This typical answer must not ever slip out the social superstar's mouth. It applies to everyday situations. right? Even if the place is completely dead… he must know something special about if that the rest of us don't if he is hanging out there.in -the -wall bar does have some special quality. Could you ask for anything better?" People like to have other people make up their mind for them. appear to have an inner knowing guiding your actions. or movie they want to go to. Don't be like the masses seeking approval before they do anything. If you claim that it is going to be a great time… make it a great time. If you've chosen join the fire department. This idea of "knowing where you're going" doesn't just apply to choosing a major in college. Instead of complaining that no one is there. you're there right? And you're the most interesting person these people know.Social Superstar If you want to capture people's attention. and is always confident in his decision. Once you decide where you're headed… do not second guess yourself. People are amazed by people who live with a sense of purpose. That is the mentality you need to have. When asked what bar. If you're convincing enough they'll begin to feel that you're right. or suggesting other places… try saying something like "This is exactly what I needed tonight. a nice quiet place to chill with some cool peeps. or picking a career. be completely confident with your decision and act as if that was the ONLY logical decision you could have made based on your belief system. If he is there. It is difficult for the common person to comprehend that a human being as dedicated his whole life to a sport. This is one of the reasons we are fascinated by athletes. After all.. Each and every one of your actions should appear to be done completely by your own accord. Think about it. "I don't know. Maybe this quiet hole. If he is there… then IT IS the coolest place you could possibly be. is must be cool. If you're at a bar and its pretty empty. they need you to point it out. Always seem one hundred percent confident in your choice of what you're doing with you leisure time. If you walked into a bar and Brad Pitt was chilling there you would automatically assume that you found the happening spot. restaurant. 79 . most people will reply. The social superstar always knows where he wants to go. They're just not cool enough to notice..

While you want to be interesting. Don' hate yourself for it. But you want to avoid being the guy who creates those feelings in people. You can avoid being this guy by not talking too much about your accomplishments. we absolutely hate feeling inferior to someone. secretly we were jealous and almost wanted him to slip up.COM I had a friend in college who was the master of this. Do not be that person. Sometimes you have to hide some of your skills in certain situations. When someone gets an unexpected promotion." It is also important as you make your climb to social superstar that you don't make a sudden improvement in fortune. and persistent… you don't want to inspire too much envy from people. Your rise to the top must seem gradual and expected. No matter what situation you were in with him you couldn't help but enjoy yourself. After awhile we even found our self "accidently" saying things that might get him in trouble. or victory… it tends to create immense envy amongst your former peers. If you begin to inspire too much envy in people they will subconsciously want to ruin you. and other people absolutely adored him. success. motivated. Although on the outside we praised him. Sometimes that is not enough though. You don't want to make the people around you feel mediocre. He just couldn't seem to do wrong.The Best of TSBMAG. And he would always talk up his experiences to other people later on. 80 . They will try to create situations in which you falter. Even if you are great at something… it is not always necessary to display your talents. we talk about the time and the place to "be excellent. You were human. Certain people have a way of making you feel small through their brilliance. We've all had that friend who was almost too perfect. passionate. In a later chapter. Even if you and him just sat in a bar drinking alone… when asked the next day he would be like "me and Bobby just had this really cool night bullshitting for hours in this hole in the wall bar… we got hammered and shared some hilarious stories. He would talk up the occasion and make you truly feel that he was genuinely pleased to be hanging with you no matter where you were or what you were doing." Do you see where I'm going? Never appear too perfect As humans.

If you’re going to be the leader of a group… it should be a group that wins. People can only suppress jealousy and envy for so long before it explodes. Vinnie Chase wants to do everything in his power to make his friends successful too? 4. 5. Delegate Authority. not Responsibility No one wants to be told what to do… but everyone loves to tell other people what to do. If you’re on the football team and everyone else on the team is too hungover for Saturday’s game… be the guy still scoring the touchdowns… because you switched to water midway through the night. If you and your buddies find yourself at a college party… be the guy who immediately fits in. If you’re planning out Prom Weekend. Don’t ever talk about how many girls you can pull… just pull them. Don’t Avoid the Risk Why was Braveheart so fucking cool? Because even though his legend would have been sealed had he never stepped foot on another battlefield… he went out there with his men each and every time. Joe will never let you down.Social Superstar Other tips for being cool 1. EVER. You’ve got to pinpoint who that guy is as quickly as possible and be prepared for the moment he turns against you. Create a Winning Group Culture Why is Derek Jeter adored… and Arod hated? Because Jeter is seen as a leader who looks out for his team’s best interest… and Arod is seen as a self serving asshole. Pump up everyone in the group… get everyone to succeed. It is crucial that you’re 81 . instead of telling Joe he’s in charge of renting out the hotel and buying the beer… Tell him you trust him to find the right guy to rent the hotel and buy the beer. Have you noticed how in the show Entourage. Know Your Competition Someone is always aiming for your top spot. When you’ve been assigned the role of leader… it’s easy to take advantage of the people below you… but that will ultimately lead to them losing respect for you. 2. 3. Don’t lecture… LEAD. Someone always will. Lead by Example It’s easy for anyone to tell someone how cool they are… You need to show them.

I brought my frank sex talk with me. and we begin to crave this person's presence. know how to use their sexuality as a key ingredient to their rise in stardom. At my command I would have girls hooking up with each other. I also found these people incredible tame for my taste. knowing that you’ve already covered all your bases.COM ready for that explosion. makes us feel comfortable with our sexuality is a refreshing change of pace. orgies (yes I will tell this story one day) and countless one night stands. They looked to me to tell them was alright to discuss and admit to. hidden affairs. and an entire other lot of topics that had previously been unheard of to discuss. Most people. and romance novels. after graduating college. For this reason. threesomes. When it happens… sit back and smile. This is something that I've always been extremely good at. I had been working in a restaurant for about a year. Soon this tame crowd was openly discussing the use of vibrators. explicit chat rooms. The Taboo and getting people comfortable talking about sex The biggest social superstars. try to suppress their sexual needs and desires.The Best of TSBMAG. I found myself spending more time with these people. Very few people give them this opportunity so it automatically puts you in an advantageous position. the individual who his comfortable. and openness to admit explicit details of my life without blinking an eye. so I tended to naturally talk about it. random games of truth or dare. I didn't socialize much with this group as I had a huge scene at college. politicians like Bill Clinton and John F Kennedy. soon they are opening up to me with their explicit thoughts. and a girlfriend that was already occupying most of my time. and better yet. by nature. I remember a few years back. 82 . Well. This leads to a population of people who hunger for their fix of sexuality through pornography. and simultaneously getting dumped by my girlfriend. While people are usually taken back at first. For the first year working there. I've never viewed sex as something dirty or to be ashamed of. I became almost a guru to them. Which gave me an unbelievable amount of power.

Almost as if you're more evolved towards it then others. You don't want to come off as the horny college guy who can't stop talking about sex. If done wrongly. This is an art form. On many occasions I would sleep with more than one girl in a night… with both of them well aware of what was going on. you create an environment where everyone feels free to indulge in it. 83 . You have to be comfortable talking about it because it is such a natural part of your life that you would not be able to understand otherwise. There were no games behind it anymore.Social Superstar By creating an environment where everyone was able to let their guard down and feel confident expressing their desires. as that will only label you a dirty hippie. you will wind up looking like a sex crazed pervert. And not something that you should assume you have the skills to do right off the bat. This is similar to the movement that went on in the 1960's with the hippies. You need to come off as having a maturity towards sex beyond your years. By creating an environment where sex is not a taboo subject. sex became just another every day activity. Although I don't suggest taking the "free love" approach.

Your Plan: 84 . This is perhaps the most powerful of all the weapons. People's attention's spans often waiver. and reciprocation. The previous chapters have given you the tools necessary to be the type of guy who people want to be around. But a crucial element to becoming a social superstar is to be liked and adored. This is why it is necessary to use specific psychological techniques that will mentally bind them to sticking with you. This weapon simply states that human beings feel a mental obligation to repay favors done for them. The third weapon of influence you must use to build your fan base is the weapon of reciprocation.COM Chapter 7: Cultivate a fan base (commitment + liking + reciprocation) Your Objective: The objective of the following chapter is to teach you how to develop a legion of people who worship you. The second step in building a fan base is to get them to commit to the idea of following your lead.The Best of TSBMAG. The following section will teach you exactly how to get people to like you. In the following section I am going to show you how use the power of reciprocation to get legions of people looking for ways to help you achieve superstardom. Once someone decides that they like you it will be much easier to use the other weapons of persuasion and influence on them. liking. The three most important weapons of persuasion and influence for building a fan base are commitment. Your communication skills need to be honed to near perfection. If you want to have people following you it is important that you first get them to like you. They quickly get sucked back into their own day to day existence.

85 . as will your "social proof. You also tend to start picturing them naked. But I also understand that there are some people reading this who will need some guidance into how to go about finding the groups of people that they want to hang out with. And b y dividing your time between several scenes the "scarcity" effect will multiply.Social Superstar This next section will get you further in life than any of the previous sections. In this short section I want to list some more ways find people with common interests. earn more money. and commitment) are so powerful that if you can master them the world will be handed to you on a silver spoon. These three weapons of influence (liking." In the previous section on "hobbies" I gave you some tips for finding way to immerse yourself into new hobbies. date more women. Part Time Jobs Most romances don’t occur between two people who meet at a bar or club. It is also important to be a member of several social scenes because it allows you to play them against each other for jealousy effect. How to Get Involved in Scenes Most of this book was written with the presumption that you already have a social scene that you can climb to the top of and command. reciprocation. It’s a fact of life. The majority of romances occur in the workplace. and live a more exciting and rewarding life than 98% of the population. It makes sense. Even if you currently have a social scene that you are active in I believe it is important that you know how to find new scenes when the time comes. If you follow the communication techniques laid out throughout the rest of this section you will make more friends. When you’re spending 4 to 8 hours a day with the same group of people you tend to get close to them.

and you will only have a minute or two to interact with customers each time they come in. The benefit is that most likely it will be a small staff of 2 or 3 people working. The girls that will work there will more than likely be the hipster intelligent type. or those of you just looking to supplement your income with a second job.The Best of TSBMAG.If you are going to get a job in a tanning salon you want to make sure it is one of the bigger chains with lots of beds.Barnes and Noble is best for the guy who genuinely likes to read and discuss books.COM I learned this lesson my junior year of high school when I took a job at Shop Right. These girls may seem kind of nerdy… but they are wild in bed. Barnes and Noble. Chances are they will all be girls. There won’t be as many co-workers to choose from. managers. This means you will have up. Everyone was hooking up. But once you graduate high school the quality of girls your age working in a supermarket will greatly diminish. All the customers will be girls as well. There will be many female customers 86 . And I mean everyone… from the 16 year old cashiers to the 55 year old Seafood Dept. those of you still waiting to find your life calling. You want to work in a salon that has at least 5-10 other people working there. If you’re in high school I would probably recommend a job in a supermarket for meeting women. These are jobs for those of you still in college. The 5 Best Part Time Jobs for Meeting Women Tanning Salon. And most of the customers will be repeat customers coming in weekly. Remember these jobs not only open you up to meeting co-workers and customers… but you also get introduced into the social scenes of all the friends you make at your new job. This means you will have a chance to build rapport over time. I wasn’t working there for more than two weeks before I realized that the employees looked at the place like it was a giant night club. A tanning salon is best for someone with a fairly good level of game. Young girls.close and personal time with any cute chick working there. I've put together a list of some of the best jobs to meet women at.

and the barely legal high school hostesses. The cafe will offer the best opportunity for flirting with customers. And I ask… Is there a better age group to be adored by? I think not. Barnes and Noble won’t offer as many hotties working there… but you will have a great opportunity to interact with those who do. Hotties with a lot of 19 year old friends. Retail Store in a Mall. You’ll work with a mix of college hotties. What makes waiting tables better than the other three jobs on this list? Alcohol. It’s an instant social scene. A lot. If you establish yourself as the fun party guy you’ll soon be adored by all the Just Graduated High School Hotts. Waiting Tables in a Restaurant. Your game needs to be good… but not great. Get a job at chain restaurant like Fridays or Houlihans and you will instantly be engulfed in a social scene of 10-20 other likeminded college students looking to get paid. Not only will your store have hotties employed in it… but so will every other store in the mall. If you’re working there for awhile you’ll become aware of the girls that work in Hollister a few stores down… the girls who work the counters in the food court… and the girls selling bra and panties in Victoria Secret. If you’re half way social and present your best self… you’ll get laid. The only drawback of a watering job is that there is very little chance of scoring with customers. single moms. If at all possible go for a position in the cafe. If you get a job in a store like The Gap you are bound to be working with adorable little 19 year old hotties. and get laid. 87 .This job is for those of you under twenty one. to enjoy the fruits of your labor. get drunk.Can you say social scene in a box? That is what waiting tables is.Social Superstar roaming the store… but it will be hard to spend a good amount of time hitting on them without pissing off your manager. The customer base will largely be young girls. You’re game doesn’t have to be good to work the restaurant scene. And it is perfect for you. The best part of waiting tables is that it is almost customary to have a drink with your co-workers when your shift ends… and we all know… one drinks turns into three or four. The mall is a Mecca of female talent.

9. Point blank… bartending is a power job. What makes bartending so great is that your co-workers and clientele are likely to be just the kind of girls you’re looking for… hot. 10.This is the Pinnacle of part time jobs. 3. 2. You get the best of all worlds.meetup. But that’s part of the power in achieving it. Don’t ask me why… but bartenders rank up there with cops for scoring the most ass. The longer you wait to break the ice… the harder it will get.” Other Ways to Expand Your Social Scene I just wanted to give you a quick list of ways you can immediately expand you social scene. 6. The first day you show up at any of these events start talking to people. You will be banging your co-workers. and they drink! It’s not easy to land a good bartending job at a cool place. easy. 21 Ways to Expand Your Social Scene 1. Of course everything on this list requires you to be social and open to meeting people. You will be raking in the cash. Don’t start with the intention of making new friends or finding a girlfriend… just make friendly conversation. 11.The Best of TSBMAG. 88 Join a young professionals organization Take a yoga or meditation class Get a part time job waiting tables Join a bowling league Join a volley ball league Attend alumni events at your previous college Attend a weekly class at your gym Check out the various clubs at www. You will have your pick of the customers. 5. Working as a bartender in a hip place says “I know important people. The trick to making friends at these kinds of things is to start right away. 7. 4. 8.com Join the Toastmasters Take dancing lessons Join a volunteer organization .COM Bartending in a Hip Bar.

In addition to this list. I highly recommend that you read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. photography. get a part time internship in a field you love (even if it's for free) 20.Social Superstar 12. 89 . Being around people that share your interests will not only make new friends available to you… new potential girlfriends… but it will also help you grow as a person and get you closer to achieving your dreams. If you implement all 13 of these characteristics to your daily life you will find that people will instantly want to be around you more. Use Myspace and Facebook to network (as opposed to hit on girls) 13. Help with a political campaign (perfect timing) 19. Attend any networking event your job puts on (and network) 18. GET OUT OF YOUR HOUSE Those are just some of the many ways you can immediately begin to meet new people and expand your social scene. that you should copy on a piece of paper and keep this list in your wallet along with your list of the six weapons of influence. Whatever your passion is find a way to immerse yourself with people who share your interest 16. computers. guitar) 14. Revive the old band and start looking for gigs at local bars 15. Teach a class on a subject you love (art. How to be liked I want to start this section off with a basic list. seminars 21. Scour the computer for local events. This list contains 13 characteristics of a likeable person. classes. The key to this is to find activities that truly interest you and inspire you. written by Sebastian Drake. Join a softball league 17. When you combine these 13 characteristics with the specific techniques I am going to lay out in the rest of the section you will have the blueprint for building a fan base.

Touch . 3. This strikes a great balance between good eye contact and not staring. and what interests them the most.when you become more curious and encourage them to speak more.the rest of the world slows down. If you catch yourself rambling for a while. Likable people are always looking to find out more about the other person. Instead they encourage others to talk and to open up. Sometimes you will not feel in the mood to smile -however. almost hypnotic.People who are at ease. People love to talk about their experiences and cool things they've done . they'll actually like you more.Closely related to the above point. Most people don't feel heard . and encourage others to talk about what they really enjoy. confident.likable people know this.COM 13 Characteristics of likeable People 1. and more emotion and affection can be expressed through touch than any number of words ever could. A quick tip: Right eye to right eye. smile a big smile. "But that's enough about me . and you both become quite important to each other.You'll consistently see magnetic people reach out and touch others. It shows a calm confidence in what they are saying and it makes them even more engaging.The Best of TSBMAG.Likable people typically are more curious to get to know other people and don't talk about themselves as much. and that smile puts people at ease. Smiling . 2. a playful punch on the arm or a big hug. Likable people and high status people do not talk too much. 4. Not talking too much .Maintaining eye contact when you talk to someone draws them deep into conversation with you . If you want to change one thing to come across more social. an easy way to adjust is to say. and happy tend to smile. Eye contact . give them a high five. Not talking about yourself . some "pound". if you choose to smile anyway you'll still get the great results. Touching shows emotion and affection and brings you closer to other people. Next time someone does or says something you really like. Look from your right eye to the right eye of the person you're talking to. 5. what they are doing. Smiling shows that you're pleased to see someone which can be really flattering. Humans crave physical contact with others.what about you?" 90 .

Whenever you see anything you like in another person.Social Superstar 6. No big deal. Just. 8.Likable people never criticize others. people get used to feeling empowered around you. Not trying to impress . that means they do not want you to tell them how to solve it. let them know. you'll instantly form a great connection with them. most people do not tell others about their problems in order to get 91 . praising. but doesn't explicitly ask for your help." You'll be amazed at how uplifting it can make other people feel. If someone brings a minor problem to you. try listening. and hate people that criticize them.When someone tells you they have a problem. The result is that a man trying to impress communicates that he's not impressive. for any reason .Somewhat accomplished people want everyone to know about the accomplishments they've made. Likable people always start off with genuine praise and appreciation before trying to give constructive feedback. maybe make a quick suggestion but don't drive the point really hard. If they ask what you'd do. letting them know you understand." 9. and criticizing is almost always useless). Next time someone tells you something heavy that you could have a long discussion on. If people aren't used to you opening up. and empowered. They want to feel understood. As crazy as it sounds. and striving to truly understand them is powerful. I really appreciate that you did that. The most impressive people never actively try to impress people. "Hey. 10. people know the solutions to their own problems. Over 90% of the time.Making people feel understood. and will only give this feedback rarely (because likable people understand that praise is a much better way to help people change than even constructive feedback. Never criticizing. Everyone wants to be understood. Once you've established that you're constantly on the lookout for great things in others. Tell them you believe in them and you think they'll sort it out. ever. and you're with them. keep it casual. If you can reach out to understand another person. Showing praise and appreciation . cared about. you might get a funny reaction at first. no long talk. 7. nodding." "I thought that was really cool how you did that. Empathy . Not trying to fix other peoples' problems . When you do mention something you really like. Really amazing people are much more humble and low key about what they've done. People universally hate criticism. instead try saying just "I understand. and appreciating constantly. People want to know that they are not alone in the world.

and refrain from showing being fazed or flustered. People start to respect you more. and so on. the more you gain control over your life. If you don't like something.COM solutions. People are very strong and quite good at solving their own problems when believed in.The Best of TSBMAG. Eliminate negativity . It brings people down.Everyone feels down from time to time. 12. The steps outlined can be used just as effective for making friends with other men who will make suitable wingman. or just good buddies. others feel slightly less inclined to be around them. or accept that it's there. 13. The more you stay composed. activist groups you disagree with. I've also recommended reading How to Win Friends and Influence People. instead.for a bonus. you have two choices: Take action to fix it. The most charismatic people never "impose" that down feeling on others. pick a couple more and start implementing. empathy.When people complain. and they feel they can rely on you. not complaining about the government. Not talking about things you dislike is even more important. Never impose weakness on others . and long term improvements down the line. When you realize that. fashions you think are silly. Especially never being down on culture-wide things outside of your direct control: So.Never mentioning anything you don't like. 92 . You'll see quick improvements right away. they want understanding. You probably already do a lot of those . pop culture. and reassurance. Never complain . Making Friends In the section below I am going to outline some steps for acquiring female friends. The most important thing that you will find is that once you implement everything you've learned in the previous section you will find it very easy to make friends. 11. they're a fort of strength for people around them. Being positive is really good. there's no reason to complain.

This is because the man who controls the women… is the man everyone wants to be around. And you will more than likely forever pine for your opportunity to finally bust through the barrier of friendship. bartenders seem to always have power? It is because these guys are always surrounded by women. The girl will always hold a subconscious power over you. Women know that hanging around these guys equals excitement and privilege. This is why it makes much more sense for you to put girls in the friend zone. But there is an important distinction between making friends with girls. Later. But the fact is. Men know that hanging around these guys will lead to more girls in their lives. Your intention was to date or sleep with them. as my skills progressed. knowing full well that I had no interest in taking the relationship any further. Whatever social scene you are currently involved in. 93 . When you get put in the friend zone your intention wasn't to be friends. I would occasionally sleep with them too. most adored woman in that scene. But by this point I was a social superstar so it was acceptable. we are trained to want every pretty girl we come across. I burned a lot of good bridges doing this. Why do club owners. For a long time I made the mistake of sleeping with cool girls. we can't have them all. In order to do this you must eliminate all desire you have to sleep with her. and getting put in the friend zone. Think about it. Because they were likely aware of your true intention. As guys. actors. you friendship is never at an even playing field.you should make an effort to befriend the hottest. DJs. Sure. Women often make the man. Guys new to studying dating and pick up will probably find this advice contradictory to the never ending battle against getting placed in the friend zone. The social superstar knows that the easiest way to climb to the top of the food chain is by having female cheerleaders cheering on your every move. I instead made friends with these girls. simply because I could.Social Superstar The Art of Acquiring Female Friends The importance acquiring female friends has been stressed many times on TSB and throughout the dating advice industry by nearly every coach.

you can use it to win her over.if she's complaining about her current job. Confidential tricks for winning her over 1.The Best of TSBMAG. or favors."Well. they always need fireman. did you see (insert movie) cause I always trust your opinion on what's good. in a conversation down the road. but by paying attention you'll be able to ask her things later. understood.COM You must accept right now that you will never sleep with her. take mental notes of what she is telling you. but to make her feel important. Once you've acquired this information. making friends with her should be relatively easy.say something like. This social proof gives you the ability to befriend her. No one can resist these things. You've already developed a strong degree of social proof. play to that. and special. Don't be obnoxious or creepy about it. Once you figure out how she views herself. You aren't going to give them gifts. The most important thing to do if you want to win someone over is to give them something. The social proof she provides you with gives you the ability to become a superstar." By doing this you're demonstrating that you see her as having an expertise in something other 94 . Appreciation mixed with adventure and excitement. For instance. Instead of waiting for your chance to talk. and adventurous guy. Remember details of her life. 2. if during a conversation she makes a joke about having wanted to be a fireman when she was little. The easiest way to make someone feel important is to really pay attention when they are talking to you. Appreciation simply means recognizes the unique qualities in her. These things devalue you. interesting. This way you can discover what her true interests and passions are. Once you've completely eliminated your desire to sleep with this woman." She won't have expected you to remember that minute detail of a previous conversation… and when you do she'll really appreciate you. For instance. Your goal is not to flatter her. compliments. if you can tell that she believes she is very knowledgeable about movies… say something like "hey. If you've followed the guidelines throughout this manuscript than you've already established yourself as a funny. Instead you will be giving her appreciation. She is merely a pawn in your chess game.

4. but play it up very well. Everything you have learned in this manuscript will work in synergy. The communication skills you are learning in this chapter do not work nearly as well if you are looked at as having lesser status.but tell her she can't tell anyone. Develop an inside joke with her. Don't hesitate to say anything you would around your male friends.greatseducer. Most guys put on such a front around her. Now whenever this person is around. 5. Be 100% completely yourself.but don't go out of your way to hide them. For instance. 95 .to head over to a strip bar with me. Don't stress your faults or blunders. She'll always be questioning you about whether or not it's true. Make it ridiculously unbelievable.com/2006/12/04/podcast-1/ Communication The way in which you communicate with them men and women in your social group will go along way toward building your fan base. If the two of you are involved in a social scene together you can pick another person in that scene and share a bit of information with her about that person. Completely drop your guard around her. 3. Most girls want to believe deep down inside that they're more than their looks. that the realness you display around her will be refreshing. make inside references to that little piece of knowledge. I got the entire staff. or beta qualities. began to make yourself more interesting. For more information on acquiring female friends listen to our podcast on the subject at: http://www. It is important that you've already completed the above listed steps so that you will be accepted by your peers as being a "higher status" male. And make her have a good time doing it.and soon the mere sight of this person will make her wish you were around to share in the humor. Get her to experience something completely outside her comfort zone. taken on the attitude of the winner.Social Superstar than looking pretty. after a work Christmas party one year. This means that the communication skills you are learning in this section are dependent on you having already created your image. and associate the rewarding and exciting feeling with you.women included.she'll become addicted to the thrill you provide. If you can get her to do something outside of her comfort zone. and give off a 10 second impression of a superstar.

You don't accept the praise as genuine.COM A lower status man who follows the principles laid out in a book like "How to Win Friends and Influence People" will come across as insincere or "try hard". a favor. If a fat girl tells you that she likes your new haircut you immediately assume that she has an agenda behind it.and her choosing to compliment you makes you feel special. The law of reciprocation is the most powerful of all the weapons of influence. But this theory holds just as true when applied to men who you view as having different social value. whether it is a compliment. People do not appreciate or respect praise or admiration that comes from someone they view as being "lower" than them.you feel a sense of "liking" toward that beautiful woman. I love the shirt you're wearing. This is why you will so often hear two people complimenting each other within seconds. And you secretly resent the fat girl for thinking that she has a chance with you simply by complimenting you. Even though it is an unconscious feeling. But when a man who you view as being "higher" up the social ladder than you does you a favor or compliments you there an unconscious bond that you feel toward him. or a gift… we do not feel a sense of completion until we reciprocate the gesture. This is because a lower status male will be viewed as having an agenda. People will assume that he is being nice because he wants something from you. Now that was an extreme example because of the examples of the two different classes of women. 96 .The Best of TSBMAG. When a man "lower" than you on the social ladder compliments you or does you a favor you feel no special bond toward him. On the other hand. That bond is the feeling of the need to reciprocate.and more importantly. When someone gives us something of value. A woman will say to another woman "I really like you earrings" and immediately the other woman will say "Thank you. the need to unburden one's self of it is so powerful that a person often acts immediately to restore the balance. people are greatly moved by admiration that comes to them from someone they view as being "higher status" then them. It is a simple concept. But if a woman of exceptional beauty tells you that she likes your new haircut you begin to feel proud of the haircut. A beautiful woman can pick and choose who she compliments." People can't have the weight of reciprocation hanging over them. You remember that compliment.

they will get back what they gave exponentially. The weight of reciprocation will be so strong on their back that they will feel the need to not only return the favor.because we recognize that imbalance between our two spheres of influence. The Law of Reciprocation and Higher Status This is the fundamental concept that you need to build your fan base: When a higher status person gives something away to a lower status person. 97 . blogs. The hierarchy in our world is based on reputation. The same rule applies just as strongly to role reciprocation plays in the social hierarchy.Social Superstar While it is only possible to gain the feeling of "liking" when a higher status person compliments you or does you a favor. Here is the kicker…. prestige. We are also greatly aware of the hierarchy and where we fit in within in. we are above thousands of other websites and blogs. compliment. providing four or five links to their site. Playboy. websites. But the level in which we reciprocate back is tenfold when we feel the person who gave us something is of higher value to us. I want to briefly show an example of how this works in the business or marketing world. We also feel a strong sense of the need to reciprocate. However.but to return it in a much greater magnitude than we originally gave it in. We feel an immediate sense of liking toward that site for recognizing our unique talent. If we (the higher status) person give something to anyone that is lower status then us. Before I explain the ways in which to apply this in the social world. When TSB is mentioned or receives a link from a site like Maxim or Playboy we recognize that a genuine favor was produced. As editor of TSB Magazine I recognize the "world" in which we reside in. or Men's Health. and influence. This world includes all of the other men's online magazines.we will go out of our way to mention them four or five times.we will get back what we've given exponentially. or gift. The sense of reciprocation is felt in any situation in which one person provides another with a favor. If a site like Maxim mentions us just once and provides one link to us. and authors. We recognize that as being fairly new TSB is below sites magazines like Maxim. number of visitors.

you want them to feel like they are a part of it. Encourage them to take risks. Well. you are able to multiply that currency. Some of the key ideas include: be funny. to indulge in the taboo. Be Fun to Be Around The entire reason you should even want to become a social superstar is for the fun and excitement it will provide you.com/2008/07/13/being-the-bad-boy-withwomen/ The secret to being fun to be around The biggest thing you can do yourself be fun to be around is to make the people you're with feel like they are fun to be around. are along for the ride. This is very similar to the saying "the rich get richer.COM This is the reason that some people seem to rapidly ascend to the top of the social ladder. taboo subjects… ultimately your goal is to bring these qualities and characteristics out from those around you. and therefore. fearless. 98 .The Best of TSBMAG. We did a podcast called "Being the badboy with women" awhile back. They will feel that they are a part of it. http://www. talk about the taboo. This is what will make them commit to seeing you achieve social superstardom. and have some skills that entertain people. Although you should be introducing things like adventure. You don't want the people around you to feel like an idle spectator in your show. Once you have established a little bit of social currency. humor. The easiest way to be fun to be around is to follow the principles laid out in chapter six. This is what will cause them to put some investment into it." Remember: Everything we give we will get back exponentially. and to demonstrate the skills that they have.the easiest way for you to acquire fun and excitement is to provide it to others.greatseducer. and adventurous. This means help those around you develop the confidence to explore their sense of humor. This podcast includes many ways in which you can add excitement to the lives of those around you. based on the law of reciprocation. As you read through the next few sections keep this in mind as it will allow you to see the true power in what I am telling you.

13. The problem is that no one takes the initiative to set them up. 8. 10. 5. themed parties. This means that they will most likely hang out at the same couple of bars or clubs every weekend. 3. ugly sweater. concerts. 12.but no one follows along. 11. 16. 14. The social superstar makes things happen. Themed parties (toga. long road trips.often they are not creative. 6. Although most high status people are fun to be around. salsa dancing. 80's) Softball games and BBQs S & M clubs Salsa clubs Concerts w/tailgating Bowling nights Road trips Ski trips Beach houses Happy hours (particularly a weekly event like Taco Tuesdays) Paintballing Sky diving excursions Hookah bars Volleyball night (some bars have courts) Strip clubs (bringing women with you) Fairs 99 .Social Superstar Be Someone Who Makes Things Happen Lower status people will always be won over much more easily than the higher status people in your social circle. This means organizing things like ski trips. paint ball expeditions. 4. 9. 7. These sorts of events are what will make you unique and separate you from the other higher status males in the group who are content to spend another night at the local pub. 15. Winning the higher status people over requires the skill of becoming the go-to guy for a good time. Or a lower status person tries to set them up. 2. Here is a list of things that you should try to organize: 1. nights out at unique places like S& M clubs. tailgating… The events I just listed are things that pretty much everyone enjoys doing. You being the high status male must initiate these sorts of things and get people to follow along with you. He is a leader who organizes the fun adventures that everyone craves.

And the person who supplies them with "drug" of recognition holds a very strong power over them. and are just silently waiting for their chance to speak. Everyone is the most important person in their own life. Here is a trick for remembering details: 100 . Remember the example I gave earlier of the woman who casually told you that she wanted to be a fireman when she grew up…. You need to use the information wisely and subtly down the road. but never take the initiative to set up. asking a lot of questions of someone may even annoy them. Get Interested in Other People I am about to tell you the secret to acquiring and keeping massive amounts of friends. you said "I'm sure there are fires you could be putting out. The sad truth is. You should not only be listening. Most people wind up at the same bars or clubs every weekend. Most people barely listen to the people that they are in conversation with. The secret is to really listen when they talk to you. Because of this very few people actually pay attention to the people around them. If you are the guy introducing other people to this whole new world… they will repay you with loyalty and admiration. everyone craves attention and recognition so much it hurts them. Anybody can ask a lot of questions to fill up the dead air. Show genuine interest in other people's lives. In fact. when she was complaining about her current job.and be their biggest fan." On the surface she probably laughed… but inside she will be flattered that you remembered such a small detail of something she told you.COM 17. This does not mean simply ask them a lot of questions. Monster truck derbies These are just some fun things that most people would enjoy. You need to store specific details away for later use. but actually remembered obscure details of a conversation. And days or months later. The secret is to continually be curious about other's lives.The Best of TSBMAG. but you should be remembering the details of the conversation. There is nothing more flattering to a person than the realization that someone not only listened to them.

She is a girl that I always thought was pretty cute. you can just tell her you have a photographic memory. Remember Names I went back for homecoming weekend at my old college last October. you can use it to demonstrate a photographic memory.Social Superstar Photographic Memory If you don't already own a digital voice recorder. Be careful not to seem too creepy by remembering too much.) These folders should be reviewed before you go out to interact with these people again. You carry the voice recorder along with you in your pocket. These people will be impressed that you were able to remember things that most people forget. When having conversations with important people you just press record. but many of my old friends and classmates show up for what is basically a yearly reunion. After making brief small talk. I had been out of school for seven years. While I am ordering a beer this girl from a sorority I used to part with frequently. and then tell her you'll call her. then repeat it loud enough for the recorder to pick it up." Her jaw dropped. 101 . But it is a pleasant surprise and a great conversation hook when you ask them about something they probably assumed you forgot. Ask for her number. She'll wonder why you didn't write it down and assume you will forget it. Later when you call. You can also use this when getting a girl's phone number. She went on to confess that she had a huge crush on me throughout college. says "hello" to me. Only stalkers know every little detail about someone. She was absolutely astonished I knew her name. Later when you go home transfer that file to your computer in a folder with their name (or better yet a code name. You can play the previous conversation and pick out important details. but she always had a boyfriend so I never talked much to her during college. she says "Do you even know my name?" I looked her straight in the eyes and said "Of course I know your name Kimberly. you need to go out and get one immediately. The night before the homecoming game everyone from the Greek system usually meets at this bar called Alexis right down the street from campus. Other than using one as a self improvement tool when it comes to perfecting tonality and conversation skills. We spent the rest of the night talking and I arranged a date to hang out. They are useful for so many activities.

entertaining.the secret to building your fan base is to become the fan of others. Let's say that there is a guy in your social scene that is slightly below you on the social ladder. And when you see anyone. So the next step is to make these people feel like Superstars. Never worry that someone else will steal your spot light. compliment them.you subconsciously believe that they are too important for you. more interesting.COM I realized something that night. Use the photographic memory trick if you have to. The lesson to be learned: Remember everyone's name the first time you hear it. When you view someone as having higher status than you. and give value to them.is to openly praise them. It is not a competition or a race. But the most important part. and fun people you have around you.they will feel the need to give back to you twice as much as you gave to them. Remember that everything you give to others will be reciprocated back to you. I actually get tingly upon hearing a beautiful woman say it.the higher your value becomes. They never get tired of hearing it.most of these people will have the same desire. It is obvious to you that he is proud of 102 . Human beings love the sound of their own name. And they feel flattered when people remember it. At first I was shocked that she would have thought I didn't know her name.no matter how low down the social ladder the may beaddress them by their name. And if the people you are giving value to are lower on the social ladder than you. You always want your team to be as strong as possible. as badly as you want to become a social superstar. This must be done in public. You see yourself as such a blip in their reality that they probably don't even know your name. But then I realized that I too get happy when a girl I view as having higher status knows my name.The Best of TSBMAG. You need to look at them as members of your team. Make Other People Feel Like Superstars As you can see by everything leading up to this section. The cooler. Making other people feel like superstars is really a culmination of everything we've learned in this chapter. And more importantly – the more enjoyable your life becomes. Just think. One night you go out with this guy and he hooks up with an attractive woman.

This is because he doesn't use concrete examples for his praise. Well. It took him like five minutes. Not only is there a sense of 103 . and turning them into superstars. The flattery must be sincere. help him to get over it." This sounds phony. You know that he wants to brag about it. Tell the story for him.make him seem even cooler than he is. And later build him up." If you can get him out of his comfort zone.Social Superstar himself. You should also make it a habit to pull people out of their comfort zone. If you know that Joe is shy around woman. making them feel important. This is your chance to boost him up even further. and contribute to him building his self esteem." Do you see how much more sincere and real it sounds when you back up praise with specific examples. He will love you for it. You've taken interest in them and have openly praised them. I say this because we all know that guy who is always seems incredibly fake while boosting up his friends. Up until now.exponentially.he's macking both of them. And you've done a nice thing for him. Talk about how "the girl was definitely into you. Before I knew. Get in the habit of being the fan of those around you. Help him by giving him practice.he will forever be in gratitude toward you. By doing things like remembering people's name. He is the coolest guy I know. The praise must be specific. You are a high value person. Don't lecture him or try to impose "strategies" on him. You know that Joe is proud of what he did. the entire focus of what I have been talking about is how you should be giving value to others. He says something like "Joe is the man. But he can't. This guy is the coolest guy I know. now is the time in which that value is paid back to you. So you do it for him.they will feel an uncontrollable sense of obligation to reciprocate the value. It should be said like this: "Joe is the man. Let Other People Sell You This is the culmination of all of everything you've been doing. Bring him into situation where he will be forced to talk to women. Not only should you acknowledge to him that you were impressed by what he did… you should brag about it for him to the other people in your social circle. Think about it. Last week the two of us were at this bar. showing interest in them. praising them. and he's making out with this cute brunette. There were two girls we both wanted to talk to.

Because these people already know who you are they will be more likely to talk to you. How many people do you think you would be telling that story to? Everyone you possibly could. causing a tornado or some such weather event to occur in another remote area of the world.but it is in their best interest to do so. These men and women will become an army of publicity agents for you.The Best of TSBMAG. The more people talk about you the higher your value becomes. this idea gave rise to the notion of a butterfly flapping it's wings in one area of the world. For instance. The waiter is there.the higher that they will be able to rise along with you. Now imagine that Brad Pitt turned out to be a really cool guy who showed genuine interest in you.COM obligation to return the favor. seemingly insignificant action will have a later effect on your life. Such systems over time become unpredictable. Your name will travel through many social circles. This means that every tiny. It turns out that one of his friends has the same interest in rock climbing that you do. You are now on "their side. Can you see how quickly you can become a social superstar? Can you see how quickly invitations will start pouring your way from various social circles? Can you see how many opportunities will be thrown at you? The Butterfly Effect "The "Butterfly Effect" is the propensity of a system to be sensitive to initial conditions. When you show up for a party random people will already know who you are.is ruled by the butterfly effect. You 104 . If you are higher value. If you're showing them a good time. remembering the large tip you gave him he recognizes you and introduces you to his friends. they will go out of their way to praise you and talk you up to everyone who will listen.they will want to be associated with you. A month later you are at a bar. tonight you walk into a restaurant and have dinner. they will be constantly talking about how much fun they had with you. Imagine that you spent a night partying with Brad Pitt. wash. It will eventually get to the point where your reputation will precede you.especially your social life." This means that the stronger and more powerful you become. You leave your waiter a larger than normal tip. If you praised them." Your entire life. They will look for every excuse to talk about "the awesome time" you had together. View it like this. and repeat on this new group of people. Rinse.

Social Superstar befriend the guy on Facebook and set a date to go rock climbing. 105 . While at the party. She invites you to come to a party with some of her friends.you meet and fall in love with another girl. All because you left a waiter an above average tip. The day before you're about to go rock climbing you leave a comment on his Facebook page telling him "Get ready for some heavy duty climbing tomorrow!" It turns out that a girl you dated several years ago is friends with him on Facebook. She sees your comment. and befriends you.

2005-2008 106 .COM PART TWO: The Best of TSB Magazine VOL 1.The Best of TSBMAG.

That example is a little over the top. To me that's just obnoxious. “Me and my ex. prostitutes. ex girl friends. Instead say. So I’m going to give you a quick list of things you can do to achieve the perception to a girl you are interested in that you “get laid” and are in demand. who was really hot…” That sounds like you’re trying to impress her. I’m not a jealous person. Never say.” You see you never said she was hot… But the girl will assume it. “One of the things me and my ex would fight about was the way she responded to the attention she got from men. 1.Social Superstar 5 Keys to Playing the Role of Being Wanted Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 09/09/2007 If you could make a girl believe one thing about you. but you get the point. co-workers. If they like him “I should like him too” is the thought that goes through their minds. I wasn’t jealous. I don’t care if these girls are friends. and intelligent? That you’re the energizer bunny in bed? If you guessed any of these things you’d be wrong for ninety nine percent of the women out there. Through Storytelling. If you want to fool a girl into believing any one thing about you it should be. passionate. Tell a story about you and a hot chick. In some of the gambits Mystery uses this plays a huge part. The story has to indirectly reference that she was hot. that you are wanted by other women. 2. or your cousins. Girls are strange creatures. They are so unsure of their own opinion that they need to confirm it with the opinion of other women. But she was like a ham when she noticed guys gawking at her. Take as many pictures of yourself with hot chicks as possible. what do you think would most make her want to date you? That you’re rich? That you’re packing nine inches? That you’re insanely confident? That you’re talented. Through Pictures. The point is to have these pictures 107 .

5. If she asks you if you think Jessica Alba is good looking. You can pull your phone out.COM lying around your house or even in your car. When you’re out with a girl. Girls by nature love to look at pictures. “She’s got sexiness. And when you can’t hang out don’t give a reason. Through Unavailability. Through Text Messages. Don’t always be available to hang out. and if she fits it.” or “How about early next week” Either way she’ll assume that if you can hold off meeting her then you must be used to meeting attractive women. The key to this is don’t mention the texts and don’t respond to the texts. “I better keep this one before he runs off with one of these girls” 3. don’t say “she’s hot” it sort of puts you in that category of college guys who read Maxim magazine. If she asks who keeps texting. Through Taking Hot Girls off a Pedestal. Girls will always assume its other girl’s texting you. When she flips through these pictures and sees you with all these girls a message will be delivered to her brain. Texting is even better. Or how “hot” she is. just say “a friend” 4. If she says “You want to get together Friday?” Say “Fridays no good?” Don’t say why. Instead say. These are just five things you can begin immediately to present the image to women that you are in demand. and then quietly put your phone back in your pocket without mentioning it. If you’re already scoring hot babes this will just be things you do naturally and in turn will make you score even more babes.The Best of TSBMAG. You can then say “Saturday would work better. She won’t ask. Just read the texts and put the phone away.” The girl will wonder what your type is. try to set it up to have many of your friends call your cell phone or text you. but she’s not my type. read the text. The rich get richer my friends… 108 . and be not at all phased by having to wait to see her. Never talk about how “hot” another girl is.

if you don’t feel it. chances are she does too. Take action quickly. I’d say that is a chance worth taking. lessons. Lead the conversation in the direction you want it to go in. 3. IT IS TIME. Do not give yourself time to second guess. flee. If you feel a vibe. the less fucking you’ll be doing. No later. principles immediately in your life. Act on it quickly. If you want pussy you better be ready to act on a minutes' notice. Learn it. and watch the used condom wrappers pile up. Because second guessing comes from thought. Read it. Intuition is priceless. not next week. or after you have time to plan out some advanced strategy. Re-read it if you fuck up. Apply these rules. That leaves 20% for error. ‘okay I feel it. Not tomorrow. In grain it. 1. Understand it. 2. That is your way of justifying the fact that you haven’t got the balls to act on a good lead. A way to procrastinate. Trust your gut. Because the more time you spend reading this shit. That is your fear of failure. Those are all excuses to delay. Unless you are a completely delusional person. while the guy who took action has his dick between her legs. now what?’ If you don’t think it is the 109 . The minute you feel your gut saying its time. The biggest mistake you can make is letting a good one slip by because you hesitated or wanted more proof that your gut feeling was right. You are probably saying. I’d say on average your gut feeling is right more that 80%of the time. With that being said. And remember. You know when talking to a girl if you are getting a vibe or not. thought is the cheapest commodity on earth. The sad truth is there are a hundred guys lined up behind you to fuck this one girl. Go with it. Delay for a second.Social Superstar 10 Lessons for Successfully Hooking Up with Girls Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/07/2007 Fuck an intro! Let’s get right down to it. and you’ll be home again masturbating. not after you get a haircut. Don’t waste another second with a dead end lead. The first ten lessons apply in situations where you have yet to kiss the girl. If you start looking for proof you’ll start finding the opposite. or a new job.

in not so many words. lead her to that place.COM appropriate place or moment to kiss her. Shit. Kiss her already. 4. I’m talking about making an initial contact. Let her know your intentions if you must leave without kissing her. Now make sure the conversation stays where you want it. yet. Brushing hair away from her eyes. Tell her. You tell a girl she is beautiful and there will be silence. You may have had the greatest conversation in the world. YOU WILL TALK YOURSELF RIGHT PAST THE MOMENT. This is our way of warning her that it is coming. That way it is not a complete shock when we lean in for the kiss. If she has on a nice smelling perfume let her know that you’ve noticed. Shit. 5. Make sure you keep the conversation light and flirtatious. If this is the case it is vital that you set the terms of your next encounter immediately. Compliment things that she can reply to. Don’t ask. Until your lips have touched hers you have shit. Those are clichés and hardly ever get you anywhere. Holding her hand. Remember: THE MORE TIME THE TWO OF YOU SPEND TALKING THE HARDER IT WILL BE TO KISS HER. she will be more than willing to follow. Holding her hand is the key. damn it. If at all possible keep holding it. I’m not talking about molester type shit. a little longer than necessary. If you let her start rambling on she may wind up talking about something that kills the mood. Yea. but if you are not at that point then you risk a potentially awkward moment. 6. If you can get her hand in yours. Her current boyfriend. Let her know. once you get her through the crowd. The hand is the first step. you are more than half way there. I know it happens. Don’t try to flatter her with remarks about her eyes. but if you leave without kissing her you are no closer to her pussy then you were yesterday. If your gut was right. A nice trick is to grab her hand when leading her through a crowded place. Before we can kiss a girl we must make use of our hands. Planting seeds is for farmers my friend. Chances are you won’t have another opportunity as perfect as you just blew. Lead her to a better spot. Nothing. it creates a certain amount of intimacy. or how pretty she is. Find a genuinely nice characteristic of hers and let her know you notice it. I stressed this point in lesson #3 but it is well worth repeating. Her last relationship. Silence is good if you are at the point where you want to move in for the kiss. Rubbing her back. Her dead aunt.The Best of TSBMAG. but DO NOT OVER DUE IT. If you are in a crowded place tell her to come with you some where more intimate. 110 . There are times that you really can’t kiss her right then and there. Throw compliments out there. It will seem completely appropriate.

10. Don’t be weak. Unfortunately you can’t fuck them all. let it go. Use your hand. When obstacles appear. While you don’t want to lose her to the competition. Most of the time the girl is just weeding out the weak.Social Superstar that when you see her again you intend on kissing her. Don’t leave it up to a phone call. Hold her hand for a second or two longer than normal while saying goodbye. you don’t give up until you have gotten in her pants or there is a painfully clear rejection. ask for the number. (Hopefully fucking her) Do this by stressing those warning signals I told you about. 8. The perfect moment does not exist. You will spread yourself to thin if you go for more than one girl at a time. and a time up. Don’t settle for less. Do not wait for the perfect moment to strike up a conversation. And I don’t know about you. If she has to leave. CONFIDENCE IS THE MOST ATTRACTIVE QUALITY YOU CAN DISPLAY TO HER. But do not try to talk her into staying around. Once you realize that nothing is going to happen tonight. WAITING FOR THE PERFECT MOMENT = ANOTHER NIGHT JERKING OFF. I hate making that call. Make up your mind quickly and stick to that decision firmly. Even if you are. push the other ones out of your mind for the time being. There is no perfect moment. The difference between a winner and a loser is. hold the hand. Set a date. 9. A winner figures out a way to win. but I am sick and tired of stroking myself to sleep. Decide who the lucky lady is for the night and go for her. 7. let her leave. Be decisive. a loser gives up that much sooner. If a girl shoots one of your attempts down and you continue on it shows vast amounts of confidence. you also don’t want to appear desperate. Tell her that you really want to see her again. DO NOT BEG FOR IT. Overcome small obstacles. It will kill your chances for next time. Once you have decided. That is why once you have decided on the girl. Those who look hungry never get fed. and I’m sure most of you do to. Girls do not like the weak. but know who the bitch of the bunch is and go for her 100%. Now I’m not saying you can’t talk to other girls and use them as jealousy tools. deal with them. Make plans to see her right then and there. and overcome them. Always leave with the upper hand. or go for the kiss. This is kind of a rehash of the other nine lessons. 111 .she’s off the list. a place. There are a million girls in the world. Follow lesson #6 while saying goodbye. Don’t act hungry. That way if you fail with her.

UNTIL YOUR DICK PENETRATES HER PUSSY YOU HAVE JACK SHIT. NO MORE! I will say it again loudly. When I say rough I mean I went months in between fucks. So fucking what? It is all shit. cheap and meaningless. SHOW ME THE PUSSY. Bad. get more pussy in a week then I did in a year. It is easier to delay.COM These are the toughest lessons to master. Why? Because they require a certain amount of balls that we all have but tend to suppress.The Best of TSBMAG. If I knew I could have her I was okay. Until you have that girl naked in your bed begging for your cock to dig inside of her. with half the sense of humor. I was the king of content. half the knowledge I had. you have not proven anything to anyone. Try and tell me how you can have any girl you want on any given day. I took comfort in the knowledge that I knew more than they did. I will laugh in your face. I learned these lessons the rough way. 112 . And it hurt. And dreams are like thoughts. Because without it you’re a dreamer. Months! I watched guys not half as good looking. As with anything in life.

Social Superstar

Emulate a Celebrity for Instant Rapport
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/19/2007

This is simple advice. I’ve done it. And I’ve seen other people do it. And it works. It works like a charm. This is best for guys who haven’t yet developed their own personal style and unleashed their own personal inner charisma. People naturally feel most comfortable around people they know. They are also most attracted to people that they see often. This is the reason people often date someone they work with, go to school with, or share mutual friends with. You see these people all the time and they are part of your consciousness. When you see these people out you are drawn to them out of their familiarity. Because they are familiar you feel rapport with them and are attracted to them easier then someone you are seeing for the first time. Follow me so far? This all came much clearer recently in Brazil. I was in a city where I knew no one. The place is filled with beautiful women. It is relatively easy to initiate a conversation with any of the girls down there, as I am a young decent looking foreigner. What I noticed about myself is that I was drawn to the girls that reminded me of girls I knew back home. I was consistently going after the girls that resembled girls from my social circle, not just in appearance but in manner. It wasn’t a conscious decision. But in a land of unfamiliarity these girls were comfortable. They put me at ease. I felt a rapport with them which made me more attracted to them. This got me to thinking. When you’re out and you see someone who looks like someone that you know, don’t you pay a little more attention to them then the other less familiar looking faces? Most people do. It’s natural. We like familiarity. Women are the same way. I’ve found that when a woman I just met tells me that I remind her of someone she knows, she is usually more responsive to me, lets things accelerate quicker, and generally less flaky in future meetings. So the question I had was how I could create this rapport more often. And the answer was to remind women of someone they know more
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often. Since we don’t know anything about most women and the men in their lives, how can we remind them of someone they know? We have to remind them of someone that everyone knows. And who does everyone know? Celebrities! I know a few guys who naturally resemble celebrities (not necessarily traditionally good looking celebrities) and these guys have always had an easy time opening women. Most of the time the women don’t even realize that the guy looks like so and so, but they feel an instant rapport with them. This is because these guys are familiar to women. The women feel like they’ve known them for a long time. They put their guards down. So a quick way to gain instant rapport with women is to emulate a celebrity. Most of us have a celebrity that we resemble in some way. It doesn’t have to be a great looking guy. It can be Tony Soprano for all it matters. It just has to be someone that is part of national consciousness. Once you decide on someone that you physically resemble (it helps if it’s someone that other people have told you) then next step is emulate their mannerisms, their tone of voice, their gestures, facial expressions, and style of dress. I’m not talking about stalker type obsessive shit… I’m just talking about emulating someone. You can rent a few videos of the person you’ve chosen and really watch them. And practice. Practice their walk, their talk, and their mannerisms. You don’t want to make it obvious that you’re trying to look like someone. And the people that know you closely will notice the change and most likely rip on you for it... But when you go out you’ll notice a huge difference in the way you are reacted to. Girls will open up to you much easier. This doesn’t mean you don’t need the game to back it up. But it will open doors that might have otherwise been shut. Try it. See for yourself and let me know the results.

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Using an Opinion Opener to Initiate a Conversation
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/01/20089

Last night after the radio show Mike Stoute and I headed over to a local pub for a couple beers. The radio show was quite stressful as there was a shit load of technical difficulties with the transmitter… which messed the phone lines up, and hence, instead of talking to our planned guest we were forced to improvise. It left us feeling drained and just looking to unwind. The both of us already had girls we were going to be meeting later on, so our intentions were solely to chat a little and throw a few beers back. As some of you know, both Mike and I are recently single, and once again experiencing some of the things that make dating such a pain in the ass. Our conversation at the bar turned towards the girls we were going to be meeting later on in the night. Both of us had been dating these girls for a brief period of time and already beginning to experience the “what is this?” or “where is this going?” or “what should I tell my friends we are?” talk. The talk that takes the fun out of casual relationships. Mike and I were telling each other various stories of time’s we’ve been in the situation and how the different girls reacted. We were trying to come up with the “right” way to answer the dreaded “what is this?” question. Although the topic was somewhat serious, we began making a goof of it by coming up with over the top comebacks to the question. “Well, Sally now that you’ve asked… I thought we would spend a few weeks fucking, you know, to keep my dick occupied until something better comes along.” The goofing put us in a better mood and got us laughing a bit. Keen to the fact that there were two fairly attractive girls standing next to us sipping drinks, Mike casually turns to them and says “What's the best way to respond to a girl when she asks ‘what is this’ and you’re not really into her?” The girls were all too eager to jump in with their opinions. The four of us quickly became immersed in conversation. Soon the question became “what do you say when someone tells you ‘I love you’ during sex, and you don’t feel the same way? This got the conversations even livelier and more provocative. Soon the two girls were met by another female
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friend and instantly dragged her into the conversations, introducing us to her as if we were long time acquaintances. After getting a handful of text messages from the girls we were supposed to be meeting later on, we decided to call it an evening and head home. Although both of the girls we were talking to at the bar were attractive, neither of them struck enough interest in Mike or me to ask for numbers. So we said goodbye and left. On the way home I got to thinking how smoothly the whole conversation transpired. It reminded me of another time a few months back when I used an opinion opener that lead to a one night stand. What the two nights had in common, and what I believe made the openers work so smoothly, was the fact that they were legitimate questions that we wanted the answer to. In the Houlihan’s story, Eddy and I were already engrossed in a conversation that was entertaining us, so it was perfectly natural to invite a couple girls into it- to share their opinions. Our energy was real and the girl’s sensed it… which opened them up to take interest in our opinion opener. The same thing happened last night with Mike. Mike and I were legitimately curious to know what a girl wanted to hear from a guy when she asks “what is this?” so the girls we asked were more than willing to commit to the conversation. I think that the biggest mistake guys make when it comes to fully understand how to use an opinion opener is that they don’t realize that they need to have some emotional involvement in the answer. If you’re using canned openers, chances are you are using an opener that someone else had emotional involvement in, and that is why it worked for them, and not for you. When I use the phrase “emotional involvement” it doesn’t mean you need to feel deeply and passionately about the topic, but it does mean that you have to have some level of curiosity and interest. For instance, most people have heard of Neil Strauss’s “80’s pop duo” opener. Neil Strauss found humor in naming dogs after an 80’s pop duo, so when he asked that opener at the very least he was entertained by the idea. Some people are out there using this same opener and weren’t even born in the 80’s and could care less about 80’s pop duos. These people have no emotional involvement in the opener and it will rarely work for
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them. If the notion of naming a couple pugs “Hall and Oates” doesn’t make you laugh, how is it supposed to be entertaining to a girl you’re imposing it on? Joseph Mathews wrote one of my favorite books on opening called “The Art of Approaching” but I think the biggest mistake others who buy that book make is that they skip all the great theory and skill building and flip right to the long collection of openers. There is nothing magic in an opener that Mathews created, or Mystery created, or Style or Tyler Durden or Mehow. Those are just openers that happened to work for them. Just like I wrote about Mike’s “what's the best answer” opener, and I’m sure I’ll read in some field report in a few weeks how someone used that as their opener. I think instead of focusing on what Mike said to initiate the conversation last night you should focus on the way the night took place. Mike and I went out to have some good conversation. We were discussing a topic that interested and entertained us. When the point in the conversation called for another opinion we casually turned to the girl’s next to us and asked them a question. Our energy was good, our topic interesting, and everything flowed from there. Now you may not always be in the middle of a great conversation when you want to approach a girl. If that’s the case, instead of using an opener from someone else’s past great conversation, use one from your own. If a couple nights ago you and a few friends were in a heated debate over whether or not American Idol is rigged… then draw upon that conversation for an opener. If you were talking about “who turns out more successful the high school nerds or jocks” then use that as opener. At least you had some emotional involvement in them at one point. And I think if you’re genuinely curious about the answer than you won’t hear that little nagging voice in the back of your head calling you a fraud when you say “Do floss before brushing?”

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Being Comfortable Talking Dirty
Written by Michael Stoute Original Published: 02/25/2008

Talking dirty to girls is something that I have struggled with for a long time. It is only now that I feel “pretty” comfortable doing it, still with some hesitancy. I am sure that this comes to some men pretty easily, but it just didn’t to me. There I was, enjoying some great sex when I hear “Tell me how you like fu*king my pus*y” Now don’t get me wrong, I did like fu*king her pus*y, yet I didn’t feel compelled to actually say it to her? Then when I would say it, I felt like I didn’t use a strong enough tone of voice and sounded weird. With all this going on I actually start to lose wood…Great! I couldn’t really understand why I was having this problem. I was confident in all other areas of my game, yet when it came to this I was on new ground. What I realized is that most of the problem had to do with me dating a different breed of woman. A woman who may not be so confident in life, but has ultimate confidence in the bedroom. Girls with more sexual experience than me in some cases… MAN UP These women want someone to take control; hair pulling seems to be as common a missionary these days. Spanking makes me think of booty’s, not babies and giving girls mild titty twister’s (purple nurple) is coming back. The sexual culture is changing and you may be missing it. Women like this don’t just tell you to pull their hair and spank them, you have to know! So how do you know?

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You have to build rapport and maintain Kino escalation to test the waters. (Build comfort and get her comfortable with you touching her and vice versa) Then move this forward veeeeerrrrrrryyy slowly. Maybe start while you are talking and touch her arm, and leave it there for like 5-10 seconds. NEVER GROPE! Keep it real calm and relaxed. Later on lean in to talk to her and use touching her leg as an effect in something you are saying. Example: You're telling some story about something and you say. “Then he grabs me and …..” When you say grabs me, grab her leg for a sec, at most until you finish your sentence, then pull away and continue with your story. Later on (if you are still being your cool guy self and are not being creepy) you need to start looking for opportunities to make a comment about her anatomy, I would go for the ass, one because it is the least confrontational and two, because I love ass! With confidence say something like, “You have a really nice looking ass, would you mind if I gave it a little smack?” MAKE SURE YOU HAVE GREAT KINO AND RAPPORT BEFORE ATTEMPTING A BOLD APPROACH LIKE THIS; IT WORKS FOR ME...THAT’S ALL I CAN SAY. Most girls just laugh, some let me smack it on the spot and others make me work for it a little. Either way, it’s a great SOI (statement of intent) that will for sure keep you out of the friend zone. If it does work, you may have just found you next sex tigress!

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and at least one of your hands in close proximity to my body. Confuse me. In the beginning you need to create sexual tension. And I want my buddies talking about 120 . 1. I want to sit around and wonder why you’re not answering the phone. 2. or a few days. We are all simply humans. but then call me late night and tell me how much you miss me. Big mistake. The point of a good date is the continuing escalation of sexual tension. I think that you'll find doing these same things will keep the girl interested as well. don’t find it necessary to flirt. I’m shallow and need the complete approval of my friends before I would seriously consider making you my girlfriend. Like my friends and get them to like you. Be unpredictable. Spend three nights having wild passionate sex with me. I want inside jokes. Nothing keeps me more interested than a girl I can’t figure out. You have to do this through a mix of playful banter and gradually increasing the amount of time your hands spend touching parts of my body. 3. teasing.COM 10 Ways a Girl Can Keep a Guy Like Me Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/09/2008 This is a list of what it takes for a girl to keep me interested. googly eyes.The Best of TSBMAG. I want to wonder if you’re going to return my call in a few hours. In the beginning I need to wonder what's going on. Flirt damn it. Too many girls. Play with my head. especially the hot ones. but then never be available to hang out. 4. and then use the term “friend” to describe me. I don’t want to talk about your job. Do it just enough that I never know what I’m in store for. Once you tell me I lose interest. because then it would become predictable. After I spend a week waiting for our Friday night date… I want you to call and say “something came up can we do it another night?” Of course I don’t want you do this all the time. Tell me you want a relationship. nor am I impressed with how smart you are with your political views. I want to know that I will easily be able to commingle you and my buddies. your daddy issues. compliments. Tell me you want your space.

But don’t be afraid to let me know I can’t get one over on you. so now I’ve set higher long term goals involving my career. 5. Do not belittle me. Laugh at my failed attempts at show boating. Make an honest attempt at getting along with them. Way too many girls do this and don’t realize it is a real turn off to guys.Social Superstar “how lucky Bobby is” behind my back. Be genuinely interested in my goals. and my hobbies. 6. I know I’m not your first. I want you to crack a few jokes on me. I won’t let you. You’re job in the beginning isn’t to show me how experienced and adventurous in bed you are… there is plenty of time to discover that later. Do not try to make me feel small. So you better make an attempt to become vaguely interested in them too. It was my magic dick that unleashed your hidden whore. No. And make me believe that you’ll have no problem with me continuing to hang out with them in the future. In college my goal was to fuck as many girls as possible. Other than the playful banter I spoke about earlier. Call me out on my bullshit. Challenge me. but if you don’t chances are I’ll be bitching to my friends about you. 7. And I’m a horrible liar so you’ll probably see right through it. my travel. And don’t just say “do you need some money?” Make a sincere effort to pay. Seem excited by the prospect of all of us doing something cool together like a camping trip or ski weekend. But I want to believe that I’ve opened up this new sexual side of you that never existed for your other boyfriends. and bust my balls from time to time. these are really the only things I truly enjoy talking about. Point out my short comings if I’m oblivious to them. I’m not cheap and would never accept your money in the beginning. I’m going to feed you a lot of bullshit. 121 . I’ve achieved that goal. Offer to pay occasionally. Sure. but damn it. 8. your job is to make me feel like I just fucked your brains out harder than any guy you’ve had before. I’ll humor you and discuss your friend Sally’s relationship with her boyfriend or your brother’s drug problem… but what I really want to be talking about is my interests. don’t act like it's my obligation to always pick up the check. Call me out on it. So will most other guys. Make me feel like I’m the best you’ve ever had in bed.

Just pick up a broom and give me a hand. I can be a downright mess at times. Care about my well being more than I do. and my sink is overflowing with dishes… I know this. So. Hint at an attraction to other girls. I’m there.The Best of TSBMAG. Hint at threesome. I’ll fall for it every time. I’ll fix it…When you need someone to move a heavy piece of furniture. 122 . when you notice that it's been a long time since I’ve changed my sheets… throw them in a basket and head to the laundry mat.COM 9. my car is a wreck. It's not your job to harass me about these things. When you get a flat tire. My house is sloppy. I’m a busy guy. I’ll hold onto that hope long past the point where there seems to be any realistic chance of it happening. or maybe an “incident in college” early in our relationship… just enough to give me a glimmer of hope that one day I’ll find myself in bed with you and one of your friends. 10.

buying the supplements. I want to crawl away. 123 . I’m naturally lazy. Still giving me nothing to work with. That adrenaline rush usually puts me in a talkative mood. She says. the more motivated we become and the harder we push ourselves. Tonight at the gym I’m all amped up after downing a super sized Red Bull. that allow me to keep decently fit. But I am usually able to motivate myself in small bursts.. “It's just my gym outfit.Social Superstar Keeping Cool and Plowing On Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/11/2008 Every so often I hit that point where the time comes I need to get my ass back in shape.. “I read that it's a proven fact that the better we perceive ourselves to look while we’re working out.” I point at the mirror in front of us. The second after I say it I immediately have that twang of self doubt… like ‘what the fuck did I just say?’ That feeling of doubt is only amplified when she looks at me like I have three heads. I slack during the winter and then panic come spring when the scale starts tipping in the wrong direction. Instead I take a deep breath and compose myself. I’m reading the bodybuilding forums.” She was wearing this pale blue shirt that really brought out her eyes.” I tell her. So I’ve began one of those small bursts of motivation.” My mind is telling me it was a stupid inappropriate moronic way to start a conversation... Plow on. “Never underestimate the power of a gym outfit. and working out again.” “Oh yea?” she says. so with confidence sky high I turn to the girl on the elliptical trainer next to me and say “that is a really nice color on you. You can’t lose on the opener. “See that mirror.

Really really good! And I’m having a great workout!” I over exaggerate my motions on the machine. It is everything afterward that counts. and casually build attraction. And the next time I do will be one step closer to rapport. I’m looking really good tonight. I don’t go for a number or even a name.COM I’m in the worst shape I’ve been in a couple years. take a deep breath and plow on. That's the way I look at gym game. This finally gets the girl laughing and smiling. wearing an old beat up t-shirt. But they’re confident enough to keep going knowing that girls forgets your “opener” a minute after you say it. and gym pants with paint stains on them. The interaction ends on a positive note. 124 . It's easy to get nervous and go into deer in headlights mode… instead compose yourself. The best approach is to mingle with a bunch of them. I’ll see her again.The Best of TSBMAG. Even naturals struggle with initiating conversations. you’re going to see the same girls. “For instance. If you go to the gym the same time every day. The point of this post is that many times you’ll initiate a conversation and get dead air. I look like I just rolled out of bed.

I realized a little later that what I was doing wrong was trying to approach these girls in a rational way to spark interest. You need to keep them in the moment if you want to score with them. When I was in college I was a machine. Or I would try too hard to fit in with the younger college guys to try to conceal my age. What I failed to realize is how self obsessed younger girls tend to be. My game on girls out of college was solid… but back in the old stomping ground I came across very AFC. 125 . I was talking to them in a way that was taking them out of the moment.. My topics of conversation usually involved questions like. “How do you like living in the dorms?” and then I would go on and tell them a story about my dorm life experience. These guys usually tend to be surrounded by hot college tail… so it got me thinking about gaming these younger girls.. In Mark Redman’s excellent e-book Conquer Your Campus he talks about how college girls crave the college experience. a line I’ve been using successfully when hanging around college girls is to turn to one of them and say “You’re trouble… There’s always one of you in the group…” and then smile. I realized it was the way I was hitting on these girls that was fucking it up for me. I would head to a college bar or college party and get no response from the girls I was trying to talk to.Social Superstar How to Talk to Younger Women Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/14/2008 Tonight I’m heading to hang out with a few college guys that I know. The best way to keep them in the moment is to talk about them. None of this worked. plowing through women (until I met the ex) but after college my skills trailed off in the same environment. Not ask them questions that make them dig for answers that take them into their head… but instead to make declarative statements about them… For instance. In the tight nit college environment girls tend to be attention whores.

I’ll say something like “That guy over there is upset because he misses his dog” and then I’ll go off the cuff with some humorous reason I observe that. 3. or how much money you make. Chances are she’s fucking some guy that lives in a dirty frat house eating Ramen noodles every night.” This gets the conversation centered in the moment… Me and her talking about how she appears to me right now. A college girl doesn’t care how good your job is.” If that dies down a bit I’ll keep the conversation ‘in the moment’ by pointing at other people standing around us and begin making random statements about them. Use the environment directly around you as a source of humor 126 . Assign her a nickname to establish rapport 4. Then you can give her a nickname.The Best of TSBMAG. Not me… why do you think that?” I’ll then usually go into some cold reading “You just have that energy about you. I’ve even used something as simple as “Trouble.COM She’ll usually say “No. A little mischievous. 2. My four step plan: 1. Make a declarative statement about her. Use a little cold reading to keep interest. Very playful and fun… The trick is to keep the interaction fun.. Avoid talking about “what is your major?”Or “Back when I was in college…” and don’t try to impress them with the things that tend to impress older girls..

I can safely say that putting this idea into action took my game to the next level. When you eliminate words and rational behavior. I don’t know what provoked me to do that. You’re letting her feel comfortable expressing her sexual side. She started to finish her sentence. Strauss defines caveman as: To directly and aggressively escalate psychical contact. and progress toward sex. And since then I’ve done it that way.Social Superstar Going Caveman on Women Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/02/2008 Neil Strauss brought the term “caveman” into popularity in his book The Game. This means they look for others to lead the way and let them know what they are doing is alright. Then one day things got completely easier. And that was when I began going caveman on women. In the past I was one of those guys who always waited for the right moment. Girl after girl in college I lost because of diarrhea of the mouth. The first time I did it was on a blind date. have “make up my mind for me” syndrome. I used to be very guilty of talking myself past a hookup. especially girls.” We are all horny fucking creatures. When you “go caveman” on a girl your bringing her into your level of animal like attraction. That night I created it. She was blown away. with a consenting woman. A friend and his girl set me up with one of her friends. Like life changing easier. It was like a disease for me. predicated on the idea that early human beings did not use intelligence and words but instinct and strength to mate. I would rope the girl in with witty banter and create the attraction. I put my finger to her lips to shut her up and then kissed her again. Why going caveman works People. At the end of the night I kissed her mid sentence. We all have that side of us that wants to get buck naked and lick each other’s privates… most of us are just 127 . but then lose her by talking myself past the moment. in turn you’re saying “it's okay to act a little irrational.

Going caveman means you stop talking and get physical. This was our first night hanging out though. She was testing me. No words were said. (This does not mean take advantage of her or intrude if she says stop) It means get her on your level.COM trained not to act that way. Unleash her hidden cavewomen. Later that night. That is cave manning!!! 128 . She would push me back. Next thing I know we’re wrestling on my living room floor. Instead of going into conversation about some stupid topic I started teasing her by gently pushing her away from me on the couch. and then I pin her down and kiss her.The Best of TSBMAG. You can’t test it and then back peddle. At this point she is already attracted to you so you can either further emotionally or intellectually stimulate her… or you can sexually stimulate her. When I kissed that girl mid sentence… she says “what was that” slightly snotty. If you’re looking to further escalate the encounter you need to ask yourself ‘what would a caveman do?’ Would he smell her hair? Would he bite her neck? Run his hands down her spine? Once you go caveman you can’t go back When you go into caveman mode it has to be for real. When we meet someone that allows us to act that way it is really liberating. her and her friends came back to my house for the after party. Another night I went out with a group of friends. There was a girl Nancy that was with us who I had been flirting with on and off for a month. She pins me down. What would a caveman do? When things are going well and you’re in a private place with a girl… things can go one of two ways. If I had apologized or went back to talking things would have been weird… instead I put my finger to her mouth… shut her up and then kissed her again… After that she spent the night.

whiny bitch…. At this Irish Pub I was at last night in Cabarete some standard AFC scooped up a drunken blonde. If I noticed 129 . He basically stopped talking to anyone around him and just sipped his drink looking miserable.Social Superstar ever Show Emotion When She Walks Away Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/01/2008 I’m currently down in the DR scouting out villas for our upcoming Mansformation Retreat. You could tell by the way he had his arm wrapped tightly around her in a “mine” sort of way that he was scared shitless of letting go in fear that his miracle score would disappear. do you think he’s making it tempting for her to return to him? Hell no. She was pretty drunk and was really anyone’s game. AFC stood there alone with a sour puss on his face repeatedly glancing at her across the bar waiting for her to return. but right now I wanted to talk about how you should compose yourself when a girl you’re hitting on in a bar walks away. But luck had it that she chose him to do body shots with. finally settling on some other guy across the bar. and noticed something last night at a bar that I wanted to address.” Well. but it negatively affects you to every other girl in the place. blonde California Hot never made it back to AFC. Now. the way he carried himself after she left sealed his fate for the worse. dance against. he looked like a needy. and stick her tongue down his throat. Well. She was drunk and kept getting side tracked chatting with everyone in the place. he had a right to be scared because a few minutes later the Irish guitar player called a couple of the girls from her group up to the stage to sing along with the chorus of “American Pie. Not only does it negatively affect you with the girl you’ve been working. Here is where AFC blew it hard… and what I’m warning you against. depressed. and even if she had originally wanted to return back to him. I will have more about the trip when I come back in a couple days.

and just genuinely having a good time. or other people around you. say hi to a friend.The Best of TSBMAG. On the same note. By acting like a sad little puppy when she leaves you’re killing your chance she’ll be back. Go back to talking with your friends.COM how miserable he looked. or fuck another dude in the bathroom… you best play it extremely cool. Forget about her until she comes back… and if she doesn’t come back. Because you can be sure that the girl will peak over at you and you want to give her a reason to come back. whether it be to take a piss. how many other people noticed the same thing? When a girl you’ve been hitting on leaves. at least now you’ll be in a position to tackle other girls. You’re safest bet is to engage yourself in conversation with the friends you came with. 130 . if you’re talking to a hottie. and she leaves. don’t make it obvious to everyone in the bar how happy you are to be talking to her… I’ve seen guys giving each other hi fives like a bunch of middle schoolers after scoring a number. AFC last night blew his whole night after losing one Hot. You also want to keep her curiosity hooked on whether or not she has you. flirting with other girls standing next to you.

I’d say pretty much everyone reading this (who’s had sex) has had the misfortune of blowing their load a tad bit too early. I’ve never met a girl who bitched that you suddenly had the urge to eat her out. 5.Social Superstar 5 Tips for Lasting Longer in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/24/2008 Raise your hand if you’ve ever been a three pump chump. Use this time to let the blood rush away from the head of your dick. 3. If you feel yourself about to orgasm early you and your partner can squeeze the smooth. The most common way of trying to delay orgasm is to take your mind out of the moment and focus on something completely non sexual… like doing your laundry. 131 . It’s frustrating and embarrassing no doubt. 4. or your grandmother. This one can work wonders. For me. 1. 2. Squeeze it firmly until the urge to orgasm passes. big head at the top of the penis to delay it. Use breathing patterns to prolong ejaculation. a project at work. Squeeze the glands at the top of the penis. it will help your cause if you close your eyes and daydream for a couple minutes. I know that I have trouble finishing when I’m doing a girl doggy style. If you feel yourself building up for an orgasm too quickly. And it definitely won’t increase your chances of sticking your wilie in the girl again…but there are ways to prevent it. but it also has the disadvantage of taking you out of the moment… As much as you want to stare down at her watching yourself go inside and out. Relax for a few minutes and when you feel its safe… go back to work. Don’t wait too long to make the squeeze or you’ll wind up splurging in your hand. Switch positions to one your less likely to climax with. The slow breaths will calm you down and let the urge to climax pass. Find out what position you tend to have trouble finishing with and switch to that position whenever you feel like you’re going to finish too early. It's best to take slow long breaths if you feel yourself getting too turned on. pull out for a couple minutes and switch to some foreplay.

COM I hope that these tips will help you from prematurely ejaculating. you only get one chance to make a first impression. 132 . Remember.The Best of TSBMAG.

Needless to say she went from being indifferent to oral… to begging me for it. I’ve found there is only one secret for becoming a better lover. or adding more foreplay will make you a better lover. Practice will get your sexual confidence up… but it won’t necessarily get you better in bed. the basics don’t change… but some girls like it hard and fast. I’ve never had that problem before. I searched my repertoire for all the things that worked on the previous girls… and she wasn’t responding to any of them. The minute I realized what she was reacting to I went right along with it. The secret is to simply pay better attention to what is working and what isn’t on a particular woman. The reason this is so important is because every woman enjoys being pleased differently. The best lover is attentive and knows how to read the clues she’s giving you. All of those things definitely won’t hurt you… But they still won’t necessarily make you better in bed. I noticed that every time my nose would press against her clit while going down on her. Recently I was quite frustrated with a girl I was dating because I couldn’t get her off with oral sex. The key line to this statement is that you have to pay attention to what works on each and every particular woman you’re with. The first few times with this girl it was driving me crazy. others slow and soft… some girls like massive foreplay… Others like their clothes ripped right off. Other people say that improving your stamina. Finally about a month in. Some girls only cum on top… other girls get off doggie. lasting longer. she would tense up tremendously and push her pelvis out to make the pressure of my nose greater.Social Superstar How to Get Better in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 Some people will tell you that the secret to getting better in bed is practice. and be willing to make the adjustments. The woman that you’re sleeping with will give you all the clues you need… you just have to be ready to read them. Sure. Sometimes she’ll verbally tell you what she likes… but most of the time you’ll have to watch how her body reacts. 133 .

She’ll do everything possible to prevent you from suddenly stopping or changing positions. and mimic them. This is not because I have some special technique… it’s because I adjust to their particular style of kissing. The most common things to look out for are the intensity of the grunts and moans she is making. When she is enjoying something she’ll usually tense up. fear of embarrassment. If you notice that a girl gets super wet and turned on when you whisper dirty commands in her ears… keep on doing it (but don’t overdo it and let it loose its affect. When she particularly fancies something you can be sure she’ll let out an extra special moan in hopes you catch on. 134 . You also want to be paying attention to the psychological factors influencing how turned on she is getting. This goes for all areas of foreplay and sex. or fear of killing the mood. push herself toward you. and spreading my legs over my head…” doesn’t mean they won’t be trying to telling you in every other conceivable way. When I sense a girl has this fetish… I’ll make sure I leave a door open. blinds up. you can try to change her style to match yours.The Best of TSBMAG. while groping my right tit. Some girls are wildly turned on by the idea of being caught. or pull you closer. But they won’t tell you out of fear of hurting your feelings. What you have to realize is that just because they’re not going to open up their mouth and say “Bobby I really like when you stick a pinky in my ass. The key is to be extremely observant and act upon the giving stimulus. Sure. or I begin the foreplay in any room but the bedroom. Everyone kisses differently. You should also watch out for her body language. But if you want that first kiss to be memorable you’ll quickly note the actions of her lips and tongue. most girls want to tell you what is working and what isn’t.) The fact is.COM I’ve had many girls tell me that I’m the most amazing kisser they’ve ever experienced.

I wound up in a relationship with a girl from my math class. and at the same time. But the minute I had a girl willing to come back to my place… I would lose all feeling down there. Because of this I felt apprehensive about hooking up with girls as I imagined them all to be much more experienced than me. I didn’t lose my virginity until my freshman year at college. this paralyzing fear of inadequacy. I sure have. There was this exhilarating sense of accomplishment. She was a virgin too. I was jerking off twice a day… hard as a rock. and I have to thank my blogger friend Evil Woobie for pushing me to finally write it. That night was the beginning of my journey on a long and bumpy road to sexual competency. and unhooked her bra with the skill of a pro… but something was noticeably wrong. things are escalating towards intimacy… and absolutely nothing is going on down there? Or you manage to finally get an erection… only to quickly lose it as you attempt to slide the condom on? If you haven’t already experienced these situations… chances are you will at some point in your life. I didn’t realize exactly how wrong until she reached her hand down my pants. I still remember the first night I brought a girl back to my dorm room. We took it slow in the bedroom and soon I was functioning full strength during make out sessions. I was surprisingly competent at making out. We were having marathon foreplay sessions where I would expand so big I felt I could burst… 135 . Have you ever found yourself with a girl. I was completely limp. I knew that physically there was nothing wrong with me… I mean. She fumbled around for a minute before I embarrassingly brought her hand back up to my chest and continued kissing her like nothing happened.Social Superstar Having Trouble Getting Hard? Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/04/2008 This is a post I’ve been meaning to write for awhile.

I never got around to putting a condom on. Mainly because I feared going for the homerun… only to fail. But I was very rarely closing the deal with them. The girls I had the best sex with were the ones I felt no pressure to perform well… i.COM But then the night came when she decided she was ready to give me her virginity. My next few attempts ended the same way. And the more anxiety I felt… the less chance I would get or maintain an erection. 2. We went out to dinner. After we broke up I entered the hell of erectile dysfunction all over again. My girlfriend went on the pill… so all was well. girls I didn’t want to sleep. 5. What I learned about my experience with limp dick 1.The Best of TSBMAG. Of course. 136 .) fat girls. When we finally got to my place I was a nervous wreck. By this time I was tearing it up with the girls on my campus. 4. I found it almost impossible to put on a condom without losing or at least greatly diminishing my erection. It most often happened in experiences where there was a built up pressure involved. The more time I had to prepare for the sexual encounter… the more anxiety I felt. The less comfortable I was with the girl… the less chance of success in the bedroom. The entire time my mind was racing with anxiety over how well I would perform at something I’ve waited 18 years to attempt. 3. Alcohol in small doses helped the problem. It wasn’t until one morning when she climbed on top of me… slid me inside her and starting bouncing up and down… that I finally was able to maintain an erection. and then a movie. girls I wasn’t supposed to sleep with.e. This meant that if I could make it past the first few mishaps with a girl… it would be smooth sailing from there on out. Alcohol in large doses made me lose all sensitivity down there. I managed to fondle myself in the bathroom enough to get it up… but when she handed me a condom to place on my boss… I fizzled away. For the rest of our relationship I never wore a condom because I saw it as Kryptonite to my erection.

I realized that much of the cause of the problem was me visualizing the worst possible outcome. to let anyone going through this know… it isn’t just you. If a girl started to reach down there and I wasn’t hard. Some of them were even experiencing it as regularly as me. Horny Goat Weed. I would pull her hand away and just pretend that I was teasing her to build anticipation. How I Handled the Problem when it occurred If I didn’t avoid sex completely with a girl… I would prolong it as long as possible with massive amounts of foreplay. Man Power. The next biggest breakthrough came with using visualizations. Once I was armed with the knowledge that other guys have gone through this too… I became a lot less nervous about the situation. Sometimes I would blame it on being “too drunk. I took Yohimbe. Ginseng. Herbal supplements don’t work. and just about every other over the counter supplement… and none of them made a damn difference. Whenever I was on a date with a girl I would start letting the anxiety take over and imagining the pain and embarrassment I would feel if I couldn’t get it up. overcoming erectile dysfunction was where I saw the most distinct result.” Other times I would blame it on being “stressed out over finals”. For the first time I felt there wasn’t just something fundamentally wrong with me. If there was still nothing going on down there… I would eat her pussy and call it a night. Road to Recovery The biggest break through that I had was one day opening up to my friends about my problem. Other times I would blame it on “just getting out of a relationship. That is my biggest inspiration for writing the article. I was amazed to find that pretty much all of them had experienced the problem before. Visualizations are a powerful tool that can be used for achieving any goal… but for me. 137 .Social Superstar 6.” What I did know was that my sexual confidence was completely down the toilet for awhile there.

When we finally finished she said “that was by far the best sex of my life. I would attempt to wear them on occasion. Repeat the image of yourself performing competently over and over in your mind. but my performance was less than stellar as my penis was only barely hard.The Best of TSBMAG. 138 . because it was the best sex of my life too. I was hard as a rock. I made her come multiple times. Conclusion It’s been many years since I’ve faced the embarrassment of an episode. I would hold the vision of this unbelievable sex in mind and it was like a fortress blocking out the anxiety. We had the most mind blowing sex of my life.” And I believed her. The mind naturally attracts what we focus on the most. I fucked her all over her house. Soon I found that I was actually going home and having the sex I was imagining. If you’re going through the problem right now the best advice I can give you is to stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen.COM I changed my internal visualizations. Instead change your focus to the mind blowing sex you intend to have. Oddly enough… with all the girls I slept with I never once had a girl force me to wear a condom. We honest to god. It’s part of being a man. I began viewing them as a tool to last longer in bed. but could not cum. I would imagine myself hard as a rock jamming her to the point of pain. Since then my mind did a 180 degree turn in regards to condoms. My first time using a condom with her I managed. I don’t kid myself to believe it will never happen again. I’ve worn them consistently since her and never once lost my erection putting one on. I would tell myself “it happens” and then begin looking forward to my next opportunity to sleep with the girl. An odd thing happened the next time we had sex. fucked for like four hours straight. If for some reason I still lost my hard on I stopped beating myself up over it. The hardest obstacle to overcome was my aversion to condoms. A few years after college I began dating this girl who refused to sleep with me raw dog. Whenever I started to feel anxiety creep in… I would start imaging having the wildest hottest sex imaginable with the girl. but if I felt myself shrinking… I would chuck it aside.

Do any of you have any tips for guys who might be facing this problem? 139 .Social Superstar If the problem still arises don’t put too much emphasis on it. Look at it like a stumbling block. and get back on the horse.

2. time and again. it lets her know she can relax around you and feel comfortable and secure. Whatever her reasons. you can tell this is happening when you hear something like “Uh…well. I’d like to talk about how you can pass those tests. In this issue.COM Wimps into Winners Written by Ross Jeffries Original Reprinted: 03/07/2007 Originally newsletter from: http://speedseduction. Why She Tests You: The Search for Strength and Certainty Look: one of the primary things that women are looking for from a man is security. If you’ll take her bullshit. But I will say this: 95% of the time. I’d like to go out with you Friday. but why don’t you call me late Friday afternoon and I’ll let you know for sure?” 140 . You see. this is important. and how to do some testing of your own. the feeling that someone is stronger than they are. or there’s some unseen competitor who she’s waiting to hear from. You thought you would get points for being “co-operative” a “helpful”. I don’t know.The Best of TSBMAG. the sad reality is that often a woman just isn’t that interested in you one way or another. it’s because you haven’t learned to recognize when you’re being tested or just haven’t yet learned how to respond properly. never get fed) 3.biz There’s a common saying in street fighting that 95% of all real fights wind up in a clinch and go to the ground. How hungry you are for her attention (remember: those who look hungry. to see: 1. Could that really be true? Frankly. Maybe you aren’t exactly the physical type she goes for. If you’ve ever been dumped for being “too nice”. or have been told. maybe she just got burned in a bad relationship. when you set rules and boundaries for her to follow. When you put a woman in her place. This search for strength is the single most important reason why she tests you. or sooner. and instead you just got the fuzzy end of the lollipop. Believe me. “let’s just be friends”. Just how much control she can exert over you and/or the relationship. a woman will test you by the second date. The other factor is ambivalence. or what I call the “make up my mind for me” syndrome.

AH. an attack. HAH! A RESPECT OPPORTUNITY!!! Look: your attitude has to be that every rude piece of behavior. and intensify her desire to please you. they flake on commitments that occur during the peak of the overwhelm. … IT’S GOT TO COME FROM THE RIGHT PLACE IN YOU!!! In other words. but firm 141 . How to Handle It…Dealing from a Position of Strength To get back to street fighting analogies. you’ll be mentally prepared. the fighting style of the late. “But you promised!” won’t cut it. and may even find yourself actually looking forward to her trying to pull shit. every silly test of hers is just an unprecedented opportunity for you to establish respect. when overwhelmed. your response to these tests.Social Superstar Finally. there is the fact that sometimes. “How could you do this to me?” or. Coming from this perspective. increase her interest. “Oh no… why is she doing this? What did I do wrong?” from now on will be…. before we go on to some specific scenarios. is just an unprecedented opportunity to… KICK THE OTHER GUY’S ASS!!!! Just so. rather than something to be feared. since you know it’s your chance to get her really hot for you!!!! Now. You have to come from the calm. modern women just get overwhelmed with eighty billion things they are trying to do at once. when you are in bed with her. Taken from this perspective. instead of being. In other words. All he’s doing is showing he can’t control himself and he just earns the woman’s contempt. let me add one other thing: when you do put her in her place. Just don’t go nuts with a stream of obscenities. great Bruce Lee that basically says that any weapon thrust your way. No. And. Whining stuff like.) The other thing that doesn’t work is acting like a hurt little boy. (Streams of obscenities are for afterwards. there’s a concept from Jeet Kun Do. good buddy. Notice I’m not saying you can’t or shouldn’t get a little pissed. as part of an attack is just a convenient target to be destroyed. the macho idiot who loses control and trashes the place when his girlfriend comes home ten minutes late is definitely not the example to follow. a woman’s bullshit and tests are great opportunities to establish respect and dramatically increase her interest in you.

if you don’t call it’s going to be a loss 142 . in any area of your life. What if she still hesitates? Well. something like. Finally. On to some scenarios. You have my number. Her response is ambivalent. if you show a non-stop. By way of contrast. say this one: You: Look. Is going out with me something you can take or leave or is it something that you’re smart enough that you really want to do that?” Then shut the hell up and listen for her answer. Now.The Best of TSBMAG. and I’m going to leave it up to you. forever and ever devotion to her.COM “take it or leave it” position. and that always gets attention. “Well. and put up with her crap and ambivalence. And you know. after years of experience and study. This is all part of displaying the critically important… WILLINGNESS TO WALK AWAY FROM HER!!! You see. point blank. why don’t you call me later in the week and….” Here’s your response: “Let me ask you a question. and they had better take advantage of the opportunity. It’s not what she’s expecting. it conveys the message that you are the prize to be pursued. Scenario one: You call to ask her out for the first time. Just be as matter of fact and non-hostile as you can. I’ve come to the conclusion that a woman can only experience real passion for you if on some level she believes she could do something to lose you! Understand that when you show this willingness to walk away. what are you doing here? You’re calling her on her ambivalence and letting her know you don’t have time to be put on hold. you’re embedding a command that she really does want to go out with you. I’d like to but. This is an attitude that will move you forward in any area that’s challenging you. this is one big reason!!! Ok. that you are the person of value. And you’re also suggesting she’s stupid if she doesn’t grab this opportunity. Understatement works best with this one. then where is that tension of knowing she could lose you? Answer: Nowhere! And that’s why you get nowhere when you put up with this kind of stuff! If you’ve seen an initially hot relationship grow ice-cold. Will this work? Very often it does.

from “My parakeet is sick” to “I’ve got to shampoo the rug”. eager to please me when I’ve done this. you don’t really get their attention until… You Give Them A Swift Kick In The Ass!! Please note I’m speaking of an attitude. unless there is an imminent threat of violence against yourself or a loved one. this may sound extreme. I need to know at least a day in advance so I can make other plans. I’ve got a rare tropical disease that’s causing me to shrink by the hour. Just say NOTHING!!!) Her: Hello? Are you there? What’s wrong? You: What’s wrong is I can’t believe the bullshit I’m hearing. that it’ll be a loss for you as well. Ok? Bye. (I’ve heard every excuse in the book. If they can’t keep it. In fact. but man does it work well!!! In fact. You: (dead silence for as long as it takes for her to talk again. I am against the use or threat of the use of violence or force against ANY human being. sayonara! Then. I guess with some people. 143 . my friend. It throws some kind of switch in their heads. I’ve seen the hardest. You’re disrespecting me and disrespecting my time and I’m NOT going to put up with it.Social Superstar for me. I am NOT talking about or in any way suggesting or condoning physical violence with a woman. Her: What????? You: Look…you made a commitment to spend time with me and now you’re blowing me off. HANG UP!! Now. I expect them to keep it. great…if not. she’ll probably call back with five minutes and apologize and ask you out!!! I’m not kidding here. but maybe what you won’t realize until after you hang up is. Got it? If you can live with that rule. My rule is. I’m talking about using your mind. I can’t make this too clear. jaded bitches go to giggly little girls. Scenario Two: She calls and cancels at the last minute without offering to do it again at some specific time. if someone makes a commitment to me. Seriously) Her: I can’t make it. NOT your fists.

unable to say anything!) YOU: Don’t ever keep me waiting like this again. self-control AND self-respect. The point is this: when women throw this stuff your way. but I expect the same. Walk a middle ground of strength. ok? I’ll always treat you respectfully. or lets you in and then proceeds to talk on the phone for at least that long while totally ignoring you. and as soon as she does say something like this: YOU: Can I ask you a question? HER: Sure. Ross 144 . YOU: Are you being intentionally rude to test me.The Best of TSBMAG. Piece and peace. Don’t put up with it. And that certainly beats a poke in the eye. Do you understand me? HER: Uh…uh…yes. and these tests will become opportunities to power her straight into your bed. like a “nice guy” and don’t lose your temper like a jerk. doesn’t it? ‘Til next time.COM Scenario Three: You go to pick her up at her place and she either keeps you waiting outside for more than ten minutes. Wait for her to finish. or are you just accidentally acting clueless? HER: (mouth dropping open in shock. you want to do the unexpected.

I and my nameless friend took this tactic a little further about a year ago. that honor would go to one of my friends who’ll remain nameless. You’ll look like a real ass if you get caught. My friend's tactic goes one step further. Anyway. Comments like “what a great time last night…” “Your party rocked…” “I was so surprised how well endowed you are. We got to talking and we were talking about my Halloween party last year that she missed. 145 . Then what we did was leave comments from them on our real profiles.. I actually forgot about my fake comments until a girl I used to have a thing for came back into my life. They do. So I left a comment from a fake chic telling me how great of a time she had. Anything that would add some value to our profile page. Just like you read the comments of a girl you’re interested in. and it's still paying off… What we did was create a couple fake female profiles on MySpace.” no just kidding about that last one. But it wasn’t my fake profile girl. as they teach in the Art of Seduction. This is a great way to create a triangle. Take advantage of this tip. Don’t think girls don’t read your comments. So if you want to create a good jealousy trap. Just don’t tell too many people what you’re doing.. I know that Dave M teaches about creating recon profiles in his Insider Internet Dating course. I was pretty bummed she missed it. But you get the point. I’m glad I didn’t invent this. But the point is. the girl I was bummed missed the party actually mentioned something like “I know you had fun that night!” She said this because she read the comment and assumed I went home with the girl… Actually I went home with a girl that night. Even for Bobby Rio this is sleazy.Social Superstar Ultimate MySpace Jealousy Tool Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 12/23/2007 Ok. what a great host I was. A recon profile is a fake female profile you create to attract men… the point of the profile is basically to see what your competition is writing to women online. and a little joke about a photo in my room. they pay attention and remember shit like that. I'm going to put a patented “sleazy” on this post.

just today's thought. I’m just saying that in the meantime get your feet wet with some piggy's.COM Aim Lower Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/15/2007 Just a quick thought… How come all of the virgin. That way when you do meet the perfect 10 you’re experienced enough sexually not to blow your load in three minutes. Aim lower. C’mon guys. Is it a front you're putting up? Is it easier to say you’ve got really high standards than it is to admit you have no game and are afraid of girls? I say this because I have a few buddies who are perpetually alone. Anyway. And when I try to set them up with a “not so hot” chick they act like I’m crazy for suggesting it. You don’t go from T-ball to the big leagues without some time in the minors. Like they’re way too good for her. When you get the perfect 10 in bed. I’m not saying you shouldn’t strive to fuck hotties. you best give her the fuck of the century. You’ve read the story! It’s all just practice for the big game. Plus its fun… but don’t tell anyone. at home Friday night masturbating guys always seem to have really high standards? These guys who have absolutely no experience with women are waiting for the perfect 10 to come along. Haven’t you notice the guys who fuck the hottest chicks also fuck the ugliest as well. Fuck that! Even Bobby Rio rolls with the fatties some time. 146 . no ass getting.The Best of TSBMAG.

Openers Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/29/2007 It seems that the topic of openers is all the rage lately. never political. I think that is why Neil Strauss's book became so famous. 147 .. A conversation starter. I read about how to deliver them. I memorized the punch lines. topical (mainly topics girls might be interested in) and they are sometimes comedic.Social Superstar PUA Openers. (Or hasn’t it always been?) What are good openers? Will Mystery openers still work? Are canned openers good? Mike Stoute and I did a podcast about openers a few months ago. that is all an opener is.) but the openers cause flirty type of arguments… not real heated win or lose type arguments. And I want to hear some comments and feedback to see what all of you think about the topic. Openers. Essentially. the routines… but I never used them in the field. are so good is because they are non threatening. Remember the topics at times are supposed to cause arguments (who lies more… floss before or after… is kissing cheating…. never anything that can be angrily argued about. the hooks. I took everything I learned in the amazing book and constructed my own “canned” openers. What I did when I was first starting out years ago was I bought the book The Art of Approaching and basically took the 50 or so openers he gives you in there and studied them. Because it gave a lot of people a handbook of what to say to a girl to start a conversation. These were original openers that better matched my unique personality. I looked for the reasons that they work. So are canned openers good? If it takes using a canned opener to get you to have the confidence to open your mouth in front of a girl then by all means use them. always light… meaning the topics are never depressing. So in reality anything that you say to a girl is an opener. It seems that people love googling openers looking for the page of perfect ones to use in bars/clubs/banks/hot dog stands/Wall Marts….. never racial. but I feel that it's time to write on the subject again. I used the outlines he gave and wrote openers that actually interested me. So what makes a good opener? The reason that openers Mystery uses or Style or any of the other canned ones that have become popular over the years.

they were imagining themselves pulling the cord. Sometimes I cheated and used a Mystery routine. Yes. Tell me I only live once… blah blah… I ran with it. (back then they weren’t so cliché) but more and more I began making up the routines on the spot. genders. These thing got one of my friends 148 . To tell me I will regret it. the wind. dates. From there I started developing routines to lead into. I created a whole shit load of openers that brought up topics I liked and started using them. But usually these stories weren’t lies… they were stories that happened to me. sometimes I felt like a liar…(”it's not lying its flirting” lol) Sometimes I would return to a bar a couple weeks later and have to remember some story I made up and roll with it again.The Best of TSBMAG. By reading books like Magic Bullets I was able to see how to construct a routine. Once you know the purpose of a routine (demonstrating higher value. It's all about how you sell it.COM For instance the question “Do you floss before or after brushing” became my opener “That piece of meat in a wonton soup… what the hell is it?” The opener “Is kissing cheating?’ became “Would you let your fiancé go to Thailand for his bachelor party?’ “You have a real confident way about you” became “You have a friendly air about you. As I used them more and more I began to see a pattern of how girls reacted to them. the impatient tandem jump instructor yelling at me… these things made the story come alive… these things got me LAID that night. I told the story… I had them imagining themselves in the plane. you must not be from New Jersey. to fit the mood of the moment." The jealous girl friend opener became “Would you be mad if your boyfriend slept with Jennifer Anniston?” This is how I got by in the beginning. I remember once. disarming obstacles…) they became easy to make up. I used my imagination and turned a true story about my backing out of a skydiving trip… into this life or death moment of manhood bullshit that the girls ate up. I just changed names. my friends and I had three different sets of girls swarmed around us waiting for me to answer the burning question “will I pussy out or will I go sky diving tomorrow?” My friend opened the set my telling them to talk me out of being a pussy.

Things are even truer when you get to the point that you’re not using canned ones. Once you know how to construct a good opener. and you’re going with the flow. Man. It actually makes you look forward to going out. It's easy.Social Superstar LAID that night… the other one (with the least game) got a number and wound up fucking her three dates later. My point isn’t to brag. and it's working…. They are merely conversation starters. He still thanks me. It's fun. you can’t ask for a better feeling!!!!! 149 . It's to tell you that openers aren't some magic mysterious lines that are hidden away for a select few. When you go out and the night really becomes an adventure.

They are on Match. As much as your ego must hate the idea of slumming. I’m talking about a plain Jane. do it. If you're wondering where to find these fuck buddies. And don’t feel bad about it.” And women want guys who get laid. They are all over. escalating. Women can smell neediness a mile away. 150 . The more comfortable and confident you get in your sexual abilities the more natural it will be for you to act sexual around women. You don’t need to promise her flowers and diamonds. So what's the best way to do this? If you're less than experienced in the bedroom I recommend going out and getting yourself a fuck buddy. Remember “you only get one chance to make a first impression.” Every time we fucked a girl that was ugly or fat we would blow it off to “practice. Nothing more. They are at bars. Your goal is get comfortable being sexual. If you're fucking a girl right. That's great. but if you’re a guy that's been sitting on the sidelines for years you’re going to need a little experience in the bedroom before you start fucking around with 9 and 10s. maybe a chunker with a cute face.COM How to Calm Your Sexual eediness Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 09/19/2007 Too many guys jump into this seduction/PUA stuff swinging for the fences. Use each other. They can look at you and know if you “get laid. talking sexual to girls.” And it works. someone with a little baggage… your goal here is not to fall in love.” Back in the day me and my friends would call it “practicing for the big game. or Adult Friendfinder. she won’t ask for those things. You probably work with one of them. Your intention should be to give her as much sexual pleasure as possible. This means getting comfortable touching girls. What's great about a fuck buddy is that because you’re getting laid a couple nights a week you won’t be so needy and hungry when you're out hunting.The Best of TSBMAG.

had an additional problem that he and many others often need help with: discerning a girl’s interest or lack of interest. plastic surgery. this incident left Dan confused and filled with self-doubt about his women-reading skills. He was sure she was into him and even admitted to me that he started envisioning how jealous his friends would be when he landed this hot babe. put into my own little rhyme sequence.” Ouch. She expressed to him that she saw him as a “cool guy and a friend. when he asked her out for coffee. He was to find out. I explained to him that this was a frequent mistake I see in men: They don’t know how to tell the difference between when a girl wants them or their attention. gym memberships.just in case you have not noticed. etc. to beautify themselves.” Let's get these fact straight fellas: Women love attention. I am used to young men coming to me for confidence boosting and for improving their internal and external relationship with the opposite sex. clothes. that she was not into him.Social Superstar Are You the Man or Just the Fan? Written by Justin B. though. Like many of us. Many women measure themselves based on how many men hit on them or give them second glances. if she is looking at him as “the man or a fan. They don’t understand how to tell. They spend exorbitant amounts of money on makeup. they had good conversations and she seemed receptive to and appreciative of his frequent compliments.” She had been smiling at him and eagerly said hello to him every time he came into the gym. This young man. Especially to hotter girls that are used to getting the attention. it is very important to keep in mind that when you think that a girl is into you. she may be really into the 151 . With this fact in mind. Original Published: 04/24/2008 Recently. He had recently had a bad blow to his intuitive confidence in this area when he had thought that a beautiful and single girl that went to his health club was interested him. I was doing a telephone Life Coaching session for a 19-year old young man named Dan. though. We all have heard some variation of this in our lives and we know it is not an easy thing to hear. this attention becomes like a drug. especially a very hot one. He claimed that “all the signals were there.

” I don’t just mean a physical impression either. There are many more but these 2 seem reoccurring. but also from having women as Life Coaching clients and friends.” It sounds crazy but it is true.The Best of TSBMAG. by now you are probably wondering how you tell if you are “the man or just a fan. Women. but you must learn to tell the difference if you don’t want to waste your time and set yourself up for needless rejection. I remember a few years back I was not sure if this very attractive girl that I worked with was into me. Watch also for her brushing her hair back nervously.” Before I go into giving some very good and specific tips let me first issue a disclaimer about anything cookie cutter when it comes to human behavior. If a woman seems not to care about the impression that she is making on you then most likely you are “just a fan. by contrast. 1) Most of the time if a woman is truly attracted to you she is going to be self-conscious around you. Below are 2 general principles and tips for judging a girls interest or lack of it. There was a group of us who ate lunch together in the building cafeteria that talked politics 152 . and collected we were and try to find ways not to feel and appear nervous. cool.not only my own experience with women. Watch particularly if you think you look good one day for her tugging at the bottom of her shirt by her stomach area: This is usually a sign that she thinks you are attractive and wants to measure up. often like to feel the “butterflies” in their stomach and like to feel that they are “being kept on their toes. There is an important principle to keep in mind when seeking to understand women: Women actually like being nervous sometimes. She is going to seem a little nervous and cognizant of her behavior. Psychology is not an exact science and a lot of the advice about human behavior is true to the extent that it shows trends. So. Pay careful attention as you read and do not read this hastily.COM attention that you are showering her with. This principle will be interwoven in some of the pointers that I address. When we men go on a date we like to take pride in how calm. If you are interested in the exact psychology behind this: in short the stomach area is a part of a woman’s body that she is usually very conscientious about. This does not mean that she does not think that you are attractive or that there is no chance of changing her interest.

If a girl is interested in you. if you are wondering and find yourself 153 . most likely you are unfortunately “just a fan. She confessed in a cute way that she had asked her friend who knew a lot about the war to fill her in because she wanted to appear smart in front of me. My friend Scott and I were in A&P a few weeks ago. I walked over with him and she saw his yogurts and asked him if they were good. A participant asked him about her habit of drinking a large Starbucks coffee every day. On this particular day she had a lot to say and I looked at her quite impressed. Scott said that she had been smiling at him a little in the gym but he was not sure if it was friendly or personalized to him. If she wants to know if you have a girlfriend you don’t have to tell her. Using the same principle. One day we were alone in the cafeteria and a news story came on television about the war in Iraq. They had exchanged pleasantries but the conversations were always short because she was working out with friends. A few months ago I was on a teleseminar conference call about addictions with one of America’s best health experts. then it probably is an addiction.she had never tried them she said. nor really look like she really cares what you think and is a little nervous. she will want to know more about you and will find a way to ask you. Then she asked him something that sealed the deal and left no room for doubt. She asked him if he had a dog and as he answered her questions. She noticed on his keychain that he had a key tag for PETCO. “I am not sure if it is an addiction…” she stated. but did smile at me and listened when I spoke.Social Superstar regularly and with a lot of zeal and passion. Right then I knew that I was not just “a fan” and I got her number. She ate with us but never said much during these conversations. To close. He cut her off and said “If you are asking about it. He bought a 6-pack of soy yogurts and I told him to go ask her if she could ring him up.she probably will find a cute way of asking. not a group of you.” She laughed and knew that it was true. she asked more questions. he got her number and was out with her that weekend. We usually stop by there after the gym and there was a hot chick working there behind the courtesy desk that goes to our gym. Not surprisingly. I walked away. You guys get the point by now: If a girl is not trying to overtly impress you. She will find ways to be closer to you and look for excuses to ask you questions. David Simon.” 2) Is she asking you questions about yourself? Bottom line guys: If a girl is not asking you questions about yourself most likely she is not into you. I want to tell a quick story.

and you are unfortunately a “fan” and not “the man.COM asking if a girl is into you.” Thank you Justin – 154 . then. like the caller.The Best of TSBMAG. the answer is probably what you do not want to hear: that she is not into you.

We are so fascinated with them because very few of us have the intestinal fortitude to be one.. but to talk about leadership.Social Superstar The Hero the Bounty and the Purpose Driven Life Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 02/24/2008 It was a very tame Saturday night for me.. Shit is upside down. but being the show is in its fourth season and I’m at the beginning… my post would be old news for most of you. The truth is we watched eight straight episodes of Lost and passed out on the couch halfway through the ninth. order Chinese. But there are people out there just like Jack. down a bottle of Pinot. Everyone is in panic.. success… but more importantly a sense of purpose. I’d love to tell a story about how 30 minutes into the first episode we were having animal sex on my kitchen table or how her friend showed up and we had a mind blowing three way… but that just wasn’t the case. I have resisted watching Lost for years but at the insistence of my brother and a couple friends I decided to give the show a shot. I’ve been hanging with this girl for a couple weeks now and we decided to stay in last night. Women. Jack selflessly tries to help everyone on the island. and watch the first season of Lost on DVD. wakes up from his black out and immediately takes on the roll of the leader. She had never seen it either and was into the idea of starting the series from the beginning. takes charge. No one has a clue what to do. The point of this post isn’t to talk about Lost. money. People are fascinated with leaders. The show begins with a plane crash. 155 . I could write a whole post about the show. and I’m sure you guys would wind up spoiling a lot of shit for me. and has all of the survivors looking up to him within an hour of the plane crash. Sure it's a television show. Until the main character. Jack. confusion mode.. And just like Jack these guys get life’s bounty.

I was going to take it. visited more countries than most people could name. and waking up in strange places with strange people. And I’ve had more than I ever dreamed I would. it took watching seven 156 . I had been following a blog. Yet. and generally lived on the edge and survived to tell about it. I think it is impossible to be free. I don’t have any regrets. I followed his journey religiously. To prove to myself that I wasn’t wasting my life away in the rat race. But even with all the books that I’ve read on the subject. Rooshv. waiting for my slice of the cheese. I recently wrote a list of 5 Must Have Self Help Books and that list included two books by Wayne Dyer. I can’t speak for anyone but myself but there are times in my life that I feel an overwhelming sense of being unfulfilled. Dyer has written many books about living on purpose. I’ve got more friends than I can count. I’m not sure freedom is as simple as throwing on a backpack. watching Lost last night I still felt as if I were missing something important. But I’m not so sure escape is that easy. Many books talk about living on purpose. In a world so obsessed with “self help” I think we often neglect the fact that the best form of “self help” is the selfless act of helping others. I was going to finally live. He did it through purpose and action.COM Jack didn’t become a leader because he was the best politician on the island. He’s back now and I recently posed a question to him in a comment. He didn’t get the girl because he sold her on his ideas through long winded speeches and debates. having three week flings with Chilean beauties. still won’t be enough. Some way to convince myself that I was free.The Best of TSBMAG. wishing badly it was me trekking on a bus through the Peruvian Andes.com where he detailed his six month trip across the continent of South America. slept with more women than I care to admit. I realize that part of the reason I wanted to take the trip was for some form of escape. Because when it comes down to it. growing a beard. my motives for the trip are still entirely selfish. And when you’re living completely self centered. And for the longest time that was my dream. He obtained the respect of everyone on the island because while they were standing around waiting to be saved… he was saving other people. something along the lines of “did you find what you were looking for?” Because I’m starting to believe that even the soul searching trip I felt destined to make….

but I woke up this morning feeling a little different. and rationalizing the trip’s every minute. worldwide democracy. to date. analyzing. and then wake up and decide it was time to go home.Social Superstar straight hours of Lost to make me finally understand what living on purpose is all about. Living on purpose means getting lost in the moment because there is something greater than your personal desire that needs to be achieved. global warming. or realizing that the girl sitting next to me was seeing something in Dr. none of them have swept me away in inspiration. judging. less “great?” I was at wake this afternoon. So understanding that I will more than likely never be trapped on deserted island and have to play the role of savior to a group of stranded castaways. While these are all noble causes. peace in the Middle East. Jack that was inside of me waiting to be released. how can I experience a sense of purpose in my life? Take on the role of leader? What kind of higher goal will transcend me to the next level of living? I think that my problem with the Dyer books I’ve read about purpose driven life. curing cancer. Maybe it was the deliriousness of staring at a television screen until the wee hours of the night. or maybe it was me seeing something in Dr. comparing and contrasting. I would be waiting for something to happen that would make me think “now I’m really living” but more than likely I would spend six months waiting. And because of that. Jack that she knew she would never see in me. or the previous movies such as Gandhi. I figured maybe I was doomed to a world of ego domination. Most of us will never have the opportunity to deliver a speech like William Wallace gives in Braveheart or liberate a nation through self sacrifice like Gandhi did. or Braveheart is that I always sort of believed you needed to be inspired by notions like ending world hunger. The father of my friend’s girlfriend passed away and as I listened to the various eulogies. But I think many of us have been mislead to believe that to “be great” you must do great things. pursuing. each speaker recollecting a 157 . but does that mean we have no choice but to view ourselves as less significant. I felt it was ‘beyond me’ to live selflessly. or national independence. That is why my South American trip would not have been the escape I was looking for. I would still be stuck in my mind. A little lost.

” It's funny how when you’re running on a few hours sleep. leaders. We don’t need our plane to crash in the South Pacific (if that's really where they are) to give us our moments to shine. great listeners. Standing there in the funeral parlor I realized we all have the choice on a daily basis to be great. great role models. how clearly something so elusive can suddenly appear. He took days off from work. and you get swept away in the emotion of a wake. your heads a little messed up from too many episodes of Lost. It's about deciding that every action you take from here on out will serve a greater purpose. It's been said over and over again that those who live on purpose and relinquish their personal wants and desires. and heroes. A few of the speakers had given heartfelt thank you to my friend who had stepped in to pull the family together as it became more and more certain that his girlfriend’s dad was going to lose his battle with cancer. Everyday each one of us is presented with situations where we can be a leader and a hero. are those who ultimately see the most of life’s bounty.” It's about deciding to be great this very minute. 158 .The Best of TSBMAG. and acted as a sense of strength for his girlfriend and her mother when the two of them would continually break down. We can be great friends. Everyone in that room viewed my friend as a hero. It's not about waiting for that moment where you can “look like a hero. One of the speakers quoted a line from "It’s a Wonderful Life" saying “no man is a failure who has friends.COM particular time in their life when the deceased impacted their life for the positive. he had long intense conversations with the dying man.

Roger Clemens was my favorite sports figure since 1986. the other part of it was that I was completely impressed with the stories of his unparalleled will and determination. 159 . The set of values they define for themselves gets pushed aside for the opportunity to be with a beautiful woman. Part of my fascination with him was based on childhood nostalgia. We have all most likely been a role where we’ve acted in a way that is not congruent with our core set of values… but watching Roger Clemens at the Congressional hearings yesterday reminded me of the importance of living with integrity. Most of us are not above striving for them.Social Superstar Integrity Makes a Man Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 02/14/2008 There is more to life than how much money you can make or how many girls you can sleep with. and how it relates to the way you interact with women. I religiously followed his career and collected his memorabilia. These are the artificial indicators of achievement in our society. I was envious of the motivation he possessed that got him out of bed at 4:30 am every morning to work his body to peak performance. But the real depth of your character and what ultimately makes you a man. The reason women have no respect for “nice guys” is because these nice guys often lack integrity. It is equally important in how you live your life. But integrity goes further than your dealings with the opposite sex. Even after I began to lose interest in baseball I still made an attempt to keep track of his career. It was to the point where my friends laughed because I changed favorite teams every time he signed a new contract. I included. We addressed integrity in our “The Lost Art of Being a Man” podcast. Their lack of integrity stems from the fact that they hold beautiful women to different standards then they hold the rest of the world. I am by no means a perfect person. I’m the only guy in NJ who walked around in an Astros hat. is living within a set of core values and beliefs that you set for yourself.

I will not deny it. But life is too short for regrets so I move on. The same can be said for Roger Clemens use of steroids. If someone casually asks me how many girls I’ve slept with. has left me with the feeling that the man lacks a sense of integrity. If you’ve ever told a girl you were going for a friend's luncheon but really had sex with an Argentine prostitute in back alley brothel…. If you’ve ever used someone else’s canned routine in the field… you’ve lied. Owning up to a mistake is what separates the men from the boys. But when I eventually got caught I laid all of my cards on the table.The Best of TSBMAG. While making a mistake is human nature. I’ve lied to girls and cheated on them. It's not something I’m proud of.COM That being said Roger Clemens choice to have himself injected with steroids is something I could forgive him for. But watching Clemens blatantly lying over and over again to save his chances for the Hall and his endorsement deals. we are human beings. And if someone casually asked Roger Clemens if he’s ever used steroids I would not condemn him for lying in that situation. It is his personal business. People fuck up. But most of us have defined our core set of values to let these sorts of lies slip by. Human beings make mistakes. and I know full well that I did. It would have been easier to continue the lies (as OJ showed us deny deny deny) but to me there is a difference between situational lying and lying about something you’ve been accused of. Something at that point of his life (mainly his fierce drive to be the best) made him feel it was necessary to use performance enhancing drugs. But if a girl claims to have slept with me. It wasn’t always easy. There is a certain shame in these types of lies. you’ve lied. I may lie as to not appear a slut in that particular situation. It is my personal business and I may not feel the need to be completely open. I relate it similarly to mistakes I’ve made where I’ve cheated on girls that I loved. My definition of living with integrity means owning up to your mistakes. Once again. I don’t think any of us are above lying. Because when you deny something you’ve done against 160 . Or doing everything in your power to correct them in the future. I told them EXACTLY how I felt and why I did it. Period. Something at that point in time (mainly my dick) made me feel it was necessary to sleep with a woman outside of my relationship. Shit happens.

He is calling numerous people liars.Social Superstar someone else’s word… you’re. take the self serving route. using his wife as a scapegoat. This is where Roger Clemens has crossed the line of simply making a “human mistake” and gone on to show an utter lack of integrity. In every situation in life you have these same two choices: You make excuses. The problem with Clemens choice of action is that the only person he is looking out for is himself. calling them a liar. 161 . blame everyone else… or you own up your mistakes and BECOME A MAN. and wasting the time of a whole lot of people who would just like to move on from this shit. in fact. In essence. be a man and move forward. questioning his best friend’s story. In the face of adversity that Clemens is facing you always have two choices: You can lie and manipulate and play the self serving “if I deny long enough they’ll forget about it” card or you can own up to your mistake.

but instead they are usually girls that we have unfinished business with… girls that “slipped away” or circumstance prevented things from going further. We clicked on many different levels… and we both were insanely attracted to each other… but Jackie was “on the promiscuous side. F. The two fall in love and date for awhile before circumstance prevents the two from continuing their love affair. We all have those girls from our past that still haunt us. That was part 162 .The whore. Jackie was a girl I worked with a few years back. and Gatsby spends the next five years building an empire to impress her with his new wealth. In the novel. The Great Gatsby Complex is an inward hope of meeting someone from your past that drives you to make decisions in your present life.” She fucked just about every guy I knew. For me there are three that pop into my head: Jackie. The reason that I decided to write about this is because the other night I realized that I still suffer from what I call The Great Gatsby Complex. He is full throttle into “the sickness” over an ex lover Daisy Buchanan. the main character Jay Gatsby has one of the strongest cases of “oneitis” I’ve ever seen. They are usually not ex girlfriends. Scott Fitzgerald’s famous novel The Great Gatsby serves to constantly remind me about the art of letting go. Daisy goes on to marry someone else.The Best of TSBMAG.COM The Great Gatsby Complex Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/23/2008 I’ve always said you can learn more from certain novels about human nature than you can from some of the most celebrated self help books. And discussed the details with me. He also throws party after party in his mansion in hopes of her showing up without the realization that it was her old lover throwing the party. It is the guy who is struggling through law school so that he can show up at his high school reunion and impress a girl he had a crush on ten years ago… it is the guy that is at the gym seven days a week building the perfect body in hope that he runs into an old flame and she’s blown away by his chiseled abs.

.Social Superstar of our friendship… helping each other get laid. The chemistry was so unbelievably hot. We got down the shore and rented a hotel… her friend quickly disappeared and left us alone in the room. Soon I found myself standing on his porch telling her how cute she was… then we kissed. and there was no way I could be caught dating her. I mention these girls because they still haunt me. Kryptonite. Later I’m so confused over what I did that I never talk to her again... I’ve found myself suggesting certain bars to my friends because of the slight chance one of these three 163 . Jaime was the most adorable girl I had ever seen and soon we were laying on the bed making out… she’s telling me how we’re going to get married… how much she likes me… and I’m enjoying it like I haven’t with any girl in a long time… I resist having sex with her for most of the night despite her constant begging. What is so dangerous about The Great Gatsby Complex is that it can begin to control your present moment. I don’t consider myself as having oneitis over any one of them… but I do find myself hoping that they’ll show up at the bar I’m at more often that I’d like to.. and when the trip ends -so does our brief romance…and our friendship. I do have fantasies of running into one of them and instantly rekindling the old unfinished feelings.. I’ve written about her before. finally I give in. I had hooked up with her sister in the past and felt a little weird at the party because her sister was there with her boyfriend (who she was with when we had our fun) so to keep myself occupied I flirted with her younger sister Jaime.. We avoided the temptation of hooking up with each other for over a year… until one night we couldn’t take it anymore and dragged each other into a bathroom during a party and made out like our life depended on it.. Jaime. She’s the friend that after five years of unbearable sexual tension we explode during a ski trip and spent a week in a hotel barely ever leaving the bed.The 17 year old. So after that night we went back to being friends. until we gradually disappeared from each other’s lives. We were both in relationships at the time with other people. Jackie was a known slut. I tried to avoid her after (she wasn’t exactly street legal) but a week later she called me up and asked me to go down the shore with her and her friend.. but there was one big problem. Later that night Jaime came back to a friend's place and we kept talking. I met Jaime at her older sister’s birthday party.The soul mate.

I know some of my actions back then weren’t stemming from my best self. chemistry. You have to know that you have all the qualities and characteristics to meet and attract an even more special girl. The final step of ridding yourself of the complex is the expression of faith. You have to forgive yourself for anything you did to contribute to ruining the romance. Part of the reason we hold onto these ghosts from our past is because we don’t believe that we’ll meet anyone better. The third step of ridding yourself of the complex is the act of forgiveness. AND THAT'S ALL THEY WERE. I don’t deny that they hold a special place in my mind… but holding on the past in this way can prevent you from meeting new girls who may have similar qualities. I know I made mistakes that might have cost me a chance at a great love affair… but what is done is done. Any of the three girls I mentioned could easily have been the love of my life… but they weren’t. These feeling never got a chance to mature so they are still burning strong… unlike ex girlfriends who we went full circle with and our feeling had a chance to run their course leaving us with both good and bad memories. Each of the three girls I mentioned added excitement and adventure to my life during the time I knew them.The Best of TSBMAG. And I am thankful for that opportunity. and connection. You have to have faith that she is out there… 164 .COM might show up there. It is time to forgive yourself and move on. I’ve found myself constantly looking around hoping to spot one of them… Holding onto the past like this ruins the opportunities that are presented to you in the present. The second step of ridding yourself of the complex is the expression of gratitude. How to Rid Your Self of the Great Gatsby Complex I think the first step in ridding yourself of the complex is the acceptance of all things past for what they were. Each of these three girls had a quality about them that separated them from the hundreds of other girls I was with during that time frame. Each of these experiences made you the person you are today. I think that the reason it's the girls that we have unfinished business with that haunt us the most is because we only have the memories of the intense attraction. They were brief romances that ended prematurely.

If you are being held back by ghosts from your pasts I suggest following the four step plan to rid yourself of the complex.Social Superstar Once you develop a sense of faith that you’ve yet to meet your ideal girl… the chains from your past are released and you begin to grow excited for what you may find in your future. 165 .

this will attract women. some of the deceased ballplayers from the shamed 1919 Chicago White Sox baseball team show up on his field and now he more deeply understands the message that he chose to have faith in: to “build it” and trust that they “will come.” If you have seen this excellent movie you know it teaches many life lessons and has some great underlying messages and themes to it. When you are being fulfilled in multiple areas of your life. which will easily translate into attracting women. Many men often note that men that seem to land a quantity of quality women into their beds give off a vibe that they “don’t really care. ironically. as they say. women will pick up on the very confident and responsible vibe you give off. I often tell them that one of their main problems I see is that they are too focused on getting women and not focused enough on building their own life and their own self-confidence and self-esteem. protagonist Ray Kinsella played by Costner is told early in the movie by a mysterious voice “Build it and he will come” as he walks through the cornfield on his large farm. though for our purposes is this key phrase “Build it and he will come” and how it can be applied to your own life with women. let us translate this phrase into “Build it and they will come. After several months. I think you all intuitively understand that what I am saying is that you have to have a strong basis for your self-esteem outside of your success with women and that. Kinsella gets a very clear vision of a baseball field in his cornfield and believes deep inside of himself that there is a connection between the “build it” part of what he heard and the vision of the baseball field. After this.COM Build it and They will Come Written by Justin B.” It is not that they don’t really care.The Best of TSBMAG. starring Kevin Costner and Ray Liotta. For our purposes. “have your shit together”. Original Published: -4/03/2008 Build it and They Will Come by Justin B In the very popular and successful 1989 movie Field of Dreams. and you build your life up to a point where you feel good about it and. What I would like to focus on today. it is rather that they are so fulfilled and 166 . His wife is skeptical but tells him to follow his vision and build the field.” As a motivational Life Coach I often deal with men that tell me that they have a difficult time attracting and dealing with quality women.

his family. When you lift weights you are going to be getting in touch with and expressing your masculinity even outside of the gym. besides women of course. though. Men find themselves best when they are happy with their work.for women. etc. 3) Practice meditation or some form of relaxation You may have never considered meditation or consider it something for New Age weirdoes. A woman I was talking with recently told me that it is very sexy for a guy to be very into his job. the last thing that they want is to be with a man that has the same issue. sports. Being this way will put your much more in touch with your own masculine energy and will make you very appealing. 1) Find a cause. purpose.Social Superstar focused on the other parts of their lives that they don’t have a lot of time to worry about how they are doing with women. While you release endorphins and build your emotional and physical muscles. Become charismatic and excited about it. his friends.” So how can you apply this philosophy to your life and “build” your own life up to make room for them to “come”? Here are some starting points although by now I am sure you get the idea. you will attract attention with your very masculine vibe. Learning to meditate.” Remember that a personality trait that women often get frustrated with about themselves is the fact that their self-esteem is too much based on what the opposite sex thinks. If you can identify your core passions and pursue them you will find yourself much more fulfilled in a holistic and overall way. I am not just saying this for the reason you might be thinking: that women like muscles. The men who have mastered this principle have inadvertently taught themselves and us a valuable lesson about the connection between their own lives and their success with women: “Build it and they will come. will build your self-confidence because you will slowly get in touch with the negative thoughts that are holding back 167 . and become passionate about it. Hopefully. Women pick up on their vibe of independence and self-fulfillment and this is very attractiveboth emotionally and sexually. because she said that it expresses a sense of confidence and fulfillment that he is strong and that he could “be strong for her. You may even consider it something for women. 2) Lift weights. or career that you are passionate about. this is your career but if not find something that interests you.

COM your success with women and other areas of your life. they will come in droves because you too “will not care. 168 . As you become more content and build your self confidence at a deep level.” Find a local meditation class or buy a book or CD on meditation.The Best of TSBMAG. “they” will come. Then watch how as you “build” your life. I usually recommend to clients anything by Steven Halpern or Deepak Chopra. See the value in them because you will feel better and therefore will not need women to make you feel good about yourself. Do not get into the trap of doing these things solely to attract women.

this phrase will hold as much importance as anything you’ve been taught before.forever ruining her for other men. I got involved in my first serious relationship my freshman year of college. I think my plan was to treat her so badly she would end it with me.Social Superstar Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/29/2008 It was actually Ross Jeffries who originally coined the phrase “Leave them better then you found them. naive to the reality of relationships.” He was talking about the women that come in and out of your life. I made her feel small by talking about her insecurities. She was a mess. and was dating more and more women. Like most young couples. So for the next six months I stayed in a relationship I was miserable in. I wasn’t much better. 169 . The thrill of this relationship lasted about 6 months. spending every waking hour together. I hated the person that I became. I criticized everything she did. asshole. Soon the resentment grew to anger. I denied most of her attempts at sexual activity. mean. But later in life when I became better with women. I barely paid attention when she spoke to me. As you get better with women. my girlfriend Jillian and I rushed in full throttle. and had the names of our future babies already picked out. I found myself falling back into this trap. And finally she did. As time went by I became more and more resentful of Jillian. After this I avoided relationships altogether for awhile. I was no longer the charming man that won her over. The more I hinted that I was looking to end the relationship the more she clung closer to me. I became a completely different person. Little by little I was ruining her. non-sexual. But the whole ordeal took a giant toll on the both of us. I heard from friends that she actually had to go for counseling. I was now this bitter. I was bitter towards her. I was a naive boy at the time. By our ninth month together I desperately wanted to be single again. and thought that by ending the relationship with this girl I would break her heart into a million pieces . I had no idea how to break free from her.

I viewed myself as the kind of guy women should stay away from. Luckily for me. I have realized that it is much less cruel to end a relationship than it is to stay involved with a girl you don’t have feelings for. Kate figured things out on her own and suddenly stopped calling me. I was deliberately saying things that I knew would make Kate feel insecure. I hated the person I was once again becoming. She was a bit upset. I felt good about the way things ended with Nancy. 170 . It was apparent to me that Kate thought things were more serious than they were. But I was too lazy to end it.The Best of TSBMAG. I wouldn’t call Kate for days at a time. and it carried over into the rest of my life. I no longer viewed myself as the kind of guy who attracts women. Soon I became the same person I was years earlier with Jillian. Since Kate I have changed my ways. You can’t avoid the pain of a breakup… but by delaying it you can make it much worse. I avoided sex with her. than I was to string a girl along. and knew it wasn’t going to go anywhere. We sat down and had the talk. but I never did. The way I felt as a person during those times with Jillian and Kate was less than human. I would openly stare at other girls. I felt like a soulless monster. and have even fucked from time to time. The lesson I learned was that I was much better off being honest with a girl about how I felt. A few months after Kate I started dating a girl Nancy. and my self esteem was shot. I explained that I didn’t want anything more than what we had. She was probably waiting for me to make the apology call. but was appreciative that I was honest with her. as our relationship was very low maintenance. Nancy and I are still friends to this day. My integrity was all but drained. Nancy was a fun girl who I enjoyed fucking. I didn’t have that dark cloud surrounding me that I had a few months earlier with Kate. A couple months into the relationship I sensed Nancy was looking for more. The repercussions of the way you treat a woman echoes throughout your life.COM I had been dating this girl Kate for like four months.

and distance myself from the friend zone that I had previously been regulated to. The next day she told me it was a mistake and that she liked me too much as a friend to continue. alluded to her attractiveness. and I coined the phrase “the sickness” back in college. Although initially she seemed a little taken back. Mack Tight referred to it as when “guys become a needy pile of shit after they become obsessed over a woman. I wanted to create a fresh persona. depression. Even as our closest friends tell us to “move on” “play it cool” “forget about her” their words go in one ear and out the other. The Anatomy of the Sickness After slowly falling for one of my female friends over the course of a year. and got more touchy feely. insomnia. Weeks before the ski trip I began avoiding her before heading up to the mountain. vomiting. It corrupts your mind first. and once again she wound up on my bed with me making out. But I persisted again that night. everything came to a boil on a ski trip.” We call it “the sickness” because once it infects you’re almost powerless against its control. The first night of the ski trip I made a dramatic change in the way I interacted with her. you may be able to avoid some of the classic mistakes that I made. We spent the rest of the trip basically locked in my 171 . By the end of the night we were lying on my bed making out. at the very least. I knew in my head that it was now or never time for making my move. I became more sexual. It happens to the best of us… and even though we most likely know we’ve been infected. The “sickness” is like oneitis on steroids. it is still near impossible to battle. Justin. but then usually brings about physical symptoms like nausea. Although I won’t pretend that you’ll be able to rid yourself of your obsession. weight loss. slowly she responded to my escalation. While the only cure for “the sickness” is time… I thought that if I wrote a detailed description of how the sickness infects (using my last battle with it as an example) you guys might be able to keep this as a guide to compare against when you feel it coming on.Social Superstar The Anatomy of the Sickness Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/30/2008 Mike.

They all reassured me telling me “it's only been a day. It made sense in my mind. While still at work I sent her a text “I want to see you. but I was in a state that I had never previously experienced.COM bedroom. My mind was on the girl a bit. I was still in “play it cool” mode so I decided to hit the bar with a couple of my friends. and had arranged for them to be delivered to her 172 .” I would momentarily feel better. I was on top of my game. So I went against my better instinct and headed to the flower shop on Monday morning. Although I left the week in the mountains feeling quite vulnerable. Quite drunk at this point.The Best of TSBMAG. And when she didn’t answer I left a message. Friday afternoon I could hardly contain my excitement to possibly spend time with her. Bad!” I expected an immediate response with her echoing the sentiment. I waited and waited… but the response never came. After the bar closed I have an after party back at my house. but I wasn’t too worried as she had a habit of flaking throughout our friendship. I had just completed my crowning achievement as a player. our strong connection as friends. or just my flat out physical attraction to her. I fell asleep that night with the phone in my hand. I began asking the opinion of a few of my friends. I bought the biggest baddest most expensive bouquet of flowers they had. The girl and I exchanged evening text messages. Somewhere in between Saturday and Sunday I convinced myself the reason that she’s avoiding me is because she doesn’t trust that I’m really into her. and then remember our wonderful week together in the mountains and get stuck in my mind trying to figure out what went wrong. I don’t know if it was the sexual tension that had built up over the last year. I began scanning my brain for reasons why she would be blowing me off. I went against my better instinct and called her. She knows I’m a player. still waiting for the call. The realization that she didn’t call set in. I was in “play it cool” mode so I figured I would wait a few days to call her. I was fairly confident that she felt the same way. I figured that what I needed to do was to prove to her that I was really into her. In fact. I would say my confidence was sky high. The first couple nights back home went ok. To be completely honest. Saturday morning is when I went into panic mode. it was like nothing I had experienced before.

When she gets to my house she acts nonchalant about not calling… and I forgive her immediately. How the night ended.Social Superstar work Tuesday night… complete with a really embarrassing card basically professing my love. I ask her to hang out but she says she’s tired and is just going to sleep. She is almost frightened to see me. As time went by I gave up hope of her calling. 173 . The few times she actually does call or text… I am too weak to play the game. She keeps avoiding seeing me. tell me how much she’s missed me… and wind up cuddled next to me on my bed. I’ve finally got her in front of me after two months of playing phone tag… but it's nothing like I imagined. Then later in moments of weakness I send her text messages asking “what's going on with us” and other shit I get nauseous thinking about. But even a fresh young 18 year old couldn’t deter me from the beginning of “the sickness.. They basically consist of me checking my phone every three minutes to see if she called. get extremely drunk… and take home some 18 year old hostess I worked with. I wait till Friday to call her again. I am plastered but somehow talk her into heading out for a couple drinks with me. Once again… no answer.was me completely shit faced handing her a love letter I wrote her… her taking the letter and leaving… never even calling me to acknowledge it. My “wet friend” tells me not to answer the phone and give her a taste of her own medicine… but “dry friend” intervenes and I wind up talking her into coming over. I decide to still send them. In my mind… she was going to confess her love to me. Later in the night I get a call from her thanking me for the flowers. then she leaves. I proceed to go out with a friend. We make out a little while… I eat her pussy. For a minute or two I tell myself I’m not going to call her back… but then I give in and call.” The next two months are a blur. I try to play it cool and act like I don’t care. The next morning I debate whether or not to cancel the flowers. Monday night she calls me at one in the morning. Finally two months later I get really drunk and show up at her work..

So I did the only thing a drunken sick bastard could do… I followed him into the bathroom and punched him square in his jaw. The night started out pleasant enough… I spent time catching up with a handful of old friends… chatting with her whenever the occasion would allow.. I didn’t feel threatened because I knew the guy. I was banging chicks left and right. So once again. I think I may have even bit him. He was dating a new girl… finally starting to get over “the sickness. 174 .COM The mess that Bobby Rio had become was finally starting to put the pieces of his life back together.. Then I began noticing that she and one of her co-workers were awfully close..The Best of TSBMAG. The next thing I know we’re ushered out to the parking lot… We’re rolling on the pavement pounding on each other’s skulls… sticking fingers in our eyes. Bobby Rio woke up the next morning at Rock Bottom. I’m going to leave this story without commentary. Finally the rest of the party breaks up the fight… they put me in a cab and send my sad sick drunk ass home. It is simply meant to show how the sickness can take hold of anyone. I began asking her questions alluding to “the weekend we spent together. But as I got drunker the cool guy shell I had been putting on was slowly cracking..” It was clear she didn’t want to talk about it. always the one with the control and calling the shots… And I fell like a toy soldier. I knew that there would be an annual Christmas party at the place she worked. I go out get completely shit faced and show up at her work party with one of my friends. Everything was becoming crystal clear… (In my drunken distorted mind) SHE WAS FUCKING THIS GUY.” But I couldn’t leave well enough alone. At that point in my life I already knew everything there was too know. I had friends that still worked there. and never would imagine her to be into him… but as I got drunker it made more and more sense.

You may be asking. That trip ignited a passion in me that burns strongly to this day. At first I tried to artificially create a sense of passion in my life. for Neil Strauss it's his love of journalism. And as Sebastian Drake talked about in our recent interview with him. It gives them something fascinating to talk to about. I used body language. something that gives meaning to their existence. improving these things will create a sense of “passive value” for you… and eventually you might even begin to feel a bit more passionate in your day to day activities. Argentina for a couple weeks to visit a friend. For Mystery it is his love of magic and showmanship. Six years ago I headed down to Buenos Aires. I didn’t truly grasp the concept of living with passion.Social Superstar Living with Passion Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 05/19/2008 The first time I heard that phrase it was from an Anthony Robbins CD. physiology. It gives them something to get excited about every morning. for Extramask its comedy… What living with a higher passion does for each of these PUAs is it gives them a reason to exist other than picking up women. “what does living with passion have to do with improving my skills at attracting women?” My answer is. and is an excellent place to start… ultimately you still won’t be living with passion. and voice tonality to present a passionate looking man to the world. for Christian Hudson its entrepreneurship. Bobby Rio’s passion in life is traveling the world. My desire to see the world is stronger than my desire for any girl or to 175 . for Cajun and Mehow its theatre. It gives them something to strive for. At the time. While improving areas of your non verbal communication may make you look and feel like a more passionate person. although I found it motivating. The greatest pickup artists in the world usually have a passion in their life greater than seducing women. for Tyler Durden its adventure. everything.

I think that the first step in cultivating your passion is to ask yourself. In fact. My happiness is never defined by how many notches I’ve added to my belt. 176 . I will never work a job that does not give me the flexibility to travel often (2 weeks vacation a year won’t cut it) nor will I date a girl who won’t just get up and go on a wild adventure with me. How this relates to pickup and seduction Since no one can ever take my love of travel away from me… I never attach excess meaning to winning or losing with a particular girl. ironically. this will attract women.” Discovering and cultivating your passion is an area that we are going to discuss in much more detail during our Mansformation Weekend Retreat. I live with a willingness to walk away from any girl… And like Life Coach Justin says in his Build it and they will Come article. what would I be doing with my life?” Really taking time to think about this question will begin to give you a deeper understanding into what internally drives you. “If money wasn’t an issue. and that.COM make any amount of money. “this will help you have a strong basis for your self-esteem outside of your success with women. it defines a lot of my criteria for jobs and relationships.The Best of TSBMAG.

If you want to get your finances in order don’t dwell on how you’re going to pay off that $15. And other times we go through a health slump where we seem to just entirely let ourselves go.000 credit card debt… just focus on paying off $25 a month. Effectively removing yourself from a slump can be a struggle. Other times we go through a dating slump (draught) where it seems like we’ll never kiss a girl again.Social Superstar 7 Secrets for Getting out of a Slump Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/25/2008 Slumps are a part of human nature. Once you’ve got in the habit of taking a walk every night. Focus on One Goal. the mere thought of the time and energy involved in starting a relationship can scare the crap out of you. focus on just talking to a couple new people a day. The most frustrating thing about slumps is that more you try to get out of one. Sometimes we get in a financial slump where we just can’t get caught up on bills. Once you’re no longer missing the $25 a month… start saving $35. we can’t figure out where to even start. but with the right motivation you can get right back on track in no time. The trick is to gradually build momentum based on small accomplishments. if you’ve been single for a long time. One of the biggest obstacles people face in overcoming slumps is they become intimidated by the task at hand. Instead of focusing on building a relationship. Now that you’ve been talking to two new people a day for a week… challenge yourself a bit and start flirting with those two new people. Once you’ve started small you should be able to develop a new routine. This prevents people from making any effort at all to interact with new people. Many times the reasons we fall into slumps is because we’ve so over whelmed by everything going on in our life that we choose to negate it all. If you’re dreading putting seven days a week in at the gym. And then when we try to get back on track. 2. Start Small. Use Small Successes to Build Momentum. We all go through them. do a few crunches when you get home from it. Here are 7 Ways to Motivate You Out of a Slump 1. the further along you seem to fall into it. It is impossible to stay energized and 177 . 3.instead commit to taking one long walk around your block every night. For instance.

Find someone who will push you through the rough times. There are some people out there who just don’t like seeing other people succeed. Motivation comes and goes. If you’re looking to get into better shape find a good workout buddy. You’re not always going to be 100% motivated. When you read over your goal make sure you’re visualizing yourself as having achieved it. If you’re piss poor and think it’s impossible to change your situation read blogs and books from people who were in similar financial states and gone on to make millions. 7. If you’re not having luck meeting a significant other. When you find yourself losing focus or motivation… pull out the index card and reread your goal. Every day. The trick is that when you’re feeling that gust of motivation to ride it out as long as possible. Write your goal on an index card and put it in your pocket. Stare at it and visualize it for however long it takes to snap you back into the right frame of mind. Carry your Goal Around With You. If you’re lonely. 4. It is pretty hard to accomplish something completely on your own. out of shape. You really need to avoid the people in your life who bring about a negative influence. If you’re goal is to get better talking to women. its best to spend that time 178 . It is much better to just pick one goal that you are committed to achieving right away. read the hundreds of stories of guys who were 30 year old virgins who went on to date some of the most beautiful women in the world. Find some Good Wingmen and Avoid the Negative. that goal will be right beside you. Realize Motivation Comes and Goes.The Best of TSBMAG. The point is you need to continually inspire yourself and at the same time remind yourself that it is completely possible.COM focused on improving too many areas at once. 6. everywhere you go. hang around guys who have already improved that area. and broke… pick the goal that you think will be the best catalyst for improving the other areas later on. I find its best to let a few select people in on your planned outcome… and ask for their help in achieving it. These are not the kind of people you want to associate yourself with. And when that gust dies down… to know that it will arrive again shortly. And ask for advice… Or hang out with guys in the process of changing themselves as well. 5. It’s quite possible that you’ll find the mere habit of working out daily will motivate you to meet more people and get your finances in order. In the time where you’re motivation is lacking. Get Inspired.

and talking to your wingmen. 179 .Social Superstar reading up on your goals. revising your plan. This will prevent you from falling back into the slump.

and fans are going to discuss it. He is as good as he is because he is able to acknowledge the emotion of disappointment or frustration. teammates. In order to be as good a baseball player as Alex Rodriguez. the game is on the line… and he strikes out. He does this in front of 50. So there is no reason he can’t overcome them in the future. Once he realizes what action causes the frustration he can move on.000 people live.The Best of TSBMAG. and millions of people watching on television. I think we would all agree he must have rock solid inner game. Alex Rodriguez is as good as he is because he is able to learn to master his emotions. He can move on because he knows that in the past he’s overcome slumps. He then looks for the lesson that was offered from the situation. and owners are going to share their opinion on it. or maybe the pitcher was just having a damn good day. In fact.COM Can You Control Your Emotions Like Arod? Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 Inner game is not about succeeding every time. If every time he went up to the plate he reminded himself how much pressure was on him… how would he ever possibly hit the ball? If every time he struck out or grounded into a double play he dwelled in the emotion of frustration or disappointment… how would he ever gather the courage to walk back up to the plate. and the manager. there are times the bases are loaded. Or even a collection of experiences. Maybe he is swinging for fences instead of just trying to make contact. He does this knowing that journalists around the country are going to talk about it. Once he 180 . maybe he took his eye off the ball for a split second too long. Can you imagine any more possible pressure? My point is you’re not good or bad based on one experience. Alex Rodriguez does not get a hit every time he goes up to the plate.

or scoring home runs. an angry manager. If you learn to control them… you’re on your way to inner game. This mean you can play the game and have as much fun with it as possible. he goes and works with the hitting coach to fix the flaw in his artillery. Chances are you don’t face anywhere near the kind of pressure Arod does.Social Superstar knows that he is certain of his ability to overcome it again. You don’t face the wrath of millions of fans. and pessimistic critics. No one is paying attention to whether you’re striking out every night. 181 . disappointed teammates. The only wraths you face are your emotions.

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Going Down in Flames
Written by Alex Strandberg Original Published: 07/03/2008

We all care way too much what a complete stranger that knows nothing about us thinks. Fear of rejection is the underlying emotion in most approaches. The thought of a beautiful woman sitting there and calling you a loser in front of the entire club makes most guys stomachs turn in knots. Sort or ironically, being rejected will bring the most success with women into your life. Let me explain Internally most guys think that they are complete lonely losers that no one could love. They greatly fear that women will find this out and have no desire for them. They learn all these cool lines and tricks but that fear of being thought of as a loser by women and confirming their already held beliefs is still strong. It carries so much weight that it cripples them from being comfortable in interactions or EVEN APPROACHING WOMEN. They try their hardest to avoid getting “rejected” in order to avoid facing their own belief system. They try their very best to do everything “right "and LOOK COOL but by the very act of trying they are doing everything wrong. From this they place way too much importance on getting a good re-action from the girl and becoming very outcome dependent and needy. If the interaction goes well they get a false sense of self esteem from the girl and feel good. If it goes badly then that fear of actually being a loser is triggered and they feel terrible. When you are outcome dependent you become very attached to what the girl thinks of you. This just breeds of insecurity and neediness which if you hadn’t guessed is a HUGE TURN OFF for women. Women are attracted to men who could take or leave any woman. Not caring whether the woman comes, stays, lays or prays seems very counter intuitive but it's what will get you the “best” results and lead to a happier and more peaceful life.

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In addition to this fear of being rejected is a fear of the unknown. If you are just starting out in approaching or have done a couple of approaches the fear of the unknown is still lingering in the background. This fear makes your mind race at a hundred miles per hour with a million Questions: “what if she pours a drink on me?” “What if she rejects me and all the people in the club laugh at me and I am humiliated?” “What if this happens?” “What if that happens?” And so on. The only way around fear of the unknown is to go straight through it and become comfortable with ambiguity of approaching and life. When you get rejected badly and the initial sting wears down you will find it hilarious how some girls will treat a complete stranger who was just saying Hi to them and being friendly. Part of the reason why they felt the need to reject you badly is how annoyed they are at being hit on all day by guys who haven’t a clue. Another part of it is the pleasure they get from rejecting guys. They love the feeling of having the power to control another person's state of emotions through their own actions. One of the biggest fears that guys carry around with them is a fear of going back to who they were before they learned of the seduction community or any self help stuff. They remember how they felt before knowing any better, the loneliness, the feeling or being powerless and useless in driving the direction of their own lives. Guy’s develop a debilitating fear of being rejected because they fear that they will go back to who they were in the past. As a result, they avoid rejection at all costs. My suggestion: Go out with the intention of getting rejected HARD. Like any fear, the only way around it is to go through it. Getting rejected, laughed at, drink thrown in face is NOT A BIG DEAL. It’s not a big deal but you need to go through harsh and “embarrassing” rejection in order to realize that it doesn’t matter what some anorexic club ho who has NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE thinks of you. Hypnotica walked around for two months unshowered, unshaven, in a dress with a dildo strapped to his head in order to get over caring about what other people think. This is a great thing to do but it’s not very practical to people with jobs and obligations. Alternatively, you can go out as many times as needed with the intention of getting rejected.
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Here are a couple of things you can do to go down in flames: -Go up to a girl or a group of girls and ask them “hey, do you like salads? I like croutons that come with salads” It’s a very stupid and ridiculous question to ask to girls in a club but it will help you get over trying to look cool and caring what they think of you. -Go up to a girl and in a suave and cheesy way say “Daddy’s home” but try not to crack up laughing before you deliver the line. After you say these two things or make up your own, DON’T try and recover and get the girl-just make the approach as bad as you can possibly make it. You might feel uneasy and dumb saying these things but those feelings will eventually go away. Each time you get rejected badly you will get closer and closer to not giving a shit what other people think about you and you will stop caring about the outcome of the situation. Releasing attachment and concern for other’s opinion of you will GREATLY improve your success with women and all other areas of your life. After a while you will actually begin to enjoy being rejected because of how funny it will become to you. Your skin will be so thick that nothing she does will be any concern of yours. It will no longer send you down a spiral of depression and completely ruin your night. I’m sort of sadistic in nature; I’m not sure what I enjoy more, being rejected badly or getting the girl. I’m leaning towards to former because getting the girl is enjoyable but getting rejected harshly in a hilarious way is damn entertaining. -Alex

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Bust Through Your Comfort Zone
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/08/2008

I´m sitting here at an outdoor internet cafe in Medellin, Colombia staring at the beautiful city surrounded by mountains, and all I can think is ¨just three years ago I used to shit myself at the thought of vacationing to Colombia.¨ I would literally freeze up imagining myself alone in Colombia. I had visions of corrupt police, rampant drug wars, kidnappings, violence, and theft. Although I had visited Brazil and Argentina on several occasions, Colombia was on a short list of places that I was too scared to venture. Well, all it took was the persuasion of one hot Colombian girl, and here I am. It's my third day here and I feel this incredible weight lifted off of my shoulders. I have always prided myself in my sense of adventure... and I cringed at the thought that there were places I was avoiding out of fear. Well, I broke through my fear... only to find that they were completely unwarranted. Yes, completely unwarranted. Like most of our fears. I´ve been giving a lot of thought about what contributes to that stealth inner game that some guys seem to have. I´ve actually been building a list of traits and actions we can make our own to slowly reach that unstoppable confidence we all want. And on that list is: THE DRIVE AND ABILITY TO BREAK THROUGH OUR COMFORT ZONES We all have comfort zones. We are comfortable with a certain group of friends. We are comfortable at certain bars and clubs. We are comfortable dating a certain scale of girls. We are comfortable performing a certain type of job. We are comfortable making a certain income... But what I´ve come to realize is that the truly confident and successful people rarely stay in their comfort zone long. Confident, successful people are always looking to push and challenge themselves. They are
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always on the lookout for new opportunities that will inspire them to be an even better person. The main reason that most of us stay in our comfort zone is fear. Sure, we will claim to really like hooking up with chubby girls. Or really love that townie bar around the corner from our house.... but what we are really saying is ¨We are not willing to take the risk to find out if something better exists.¨ But the fact remains: Something better does exist. But we won´t ever attain it if we aren´t willing to sacrifice comfort for a little while. Here is my advice: Take Action Make a list of people, places, and actions that are a part of your comfort zone. Do you go to the same hair stylist because you love their haircut, or are you afraid to try someone else? Do you find yourself heading to the same bar? Buying the same polo t-shirts? Hitting on the same scale of girls? Going for the same type of job? Make a list of everything that falls within your comfort zone. Once you´ve created a list of things that make up your comfort zone; make another list. This is your Action List. On this list write down one step you can take towards breaking out of your comfort zone. Write the name of a bar you´ve always wanted to check out. Write the image change you´ve been dying to make. Write down the job you´ve always wanted to apply for. Now look at that list. And do everything on it. You want unstoppable inner game? Then do it. Do it.

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10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/06/2008

You want to see immediate results? You want to start getting more phone numbers, more looks, more compliments? Then implement these simple ten steps now and you’ll have more dates than you can handle. Tip #1- Improve your Posture Most people don’t realize the importance of posture. But it says more about you than anything that comes out of your mouth. Bad posture can make you look bored, depressed, or just plain homely. Improving your posture starts with becoming aware of it. Just being aware of excessive slouching will force you to take action right then. Toning your muscles through exercise will also help enhance posture. Place your head squarely on top of your neck, make sure your shoulders are upright and your back is arched forward. This will make you appear taller and more confident. Be sure to leave your arms relaxed and loose. A great way to improve posture is to remain active throughout the day. This will prevent your body from being molded the wrong way. Tip #2- Smile A smile can literally light up a room. A man or woman who walks around flashing a smile will always be perceived to be more attractive. With a healthy smile, we are able to transmit the emotions within our hearts. It is very true that our smile reflects our mood, personality and even our inner health. Smiling makes you seem warmer, more inviting, confident, happy… but the best part is that a great smile can make someone else feel all of these same emotions and attach them to you. The best way to improve your smile is by practicing in front of a mirror. Make sure that what you're intending as a smile isn’t coming off as a smirk. Also pay attention to your teeth. Nice teeth are a cornerstone of a good smile. If you’re teeth are yellow consider getting them whitened. It is also important to stay on top of dentist visits. Tip #3- Tanning
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Don’t misunderstand this tip as a call for you to turn yourself into an orange oompa loompa. Orange skin is not attractive. But some healthy looking color can benefit anyone, especially in the winter time when our complexions tend to get pale. I would generally recommend tanning a few times a month. I usually go just enough to have color, but not so much that people can recognize that I’ve been tanning. Tan skin makes you look thinner, healthier, and tends to make your clothes look better against your skin. It also helps hide imperfections in your complexion. Tip #4- Be Flirtatious Someone who knows how to flirt effectively will always attract more of the opposite sex than someone who solely relies on their looks. Flirting is an art form that if you can master you will be a few steps ahead of the competition. Flirting is essential in creating sexual tension. They key to flirting is achieving a sense of relaxed playfulness. Teasing is a great way to flirt. As is competitive flirting which takes the form of slight sarcasm and dry wit. Cooperative flirting is different. Rather than jabbing her, you pull her into your reality and create an “us against the world” dynamic. Flirting is a mix of pushing away with words and pulling in with actions. In the game of flirting think back to how you acted towards that classmate you had a crush on in the fourth grade… and act the same exact way. Tip #5- Get an Expensive Haircut The haircut needs to be great. It is very easy to go the cheap route when it comes to getting your haircut and head to the local Supercuts. This won’t cut it if your goal is to immediately make yourself more attractive. The key here is going to a salon that has a great reputation. These salons will usually cost you much more than your local barber… but it's worth it. Movie stars look like movie stars because they have the best that money can by making them look that way. Even if it is only a one time deal you deserve to get a “movie star” haircut. Stylists at these salons know how to shape a haircut around your particular face, head size, and personal style. There will be a huge difference. Even if you can’t afford to
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On the other end if you’re an above average looking person but you hang out with the local riff raft people will look for your negative qualities to explain why you’re slumming. at least you can take some pictures of yourself and plaster your MySpace profile with them! Tip #6. I would usually recommend taking a few individual lessons before you jump into the 189 . People like to make opinions quickly. or other skin conditions. Others actions that you can take is cutting your nails. And one of the easiest ways to do this is to lump you in with the company you keep.Social Superstar continually get your hair cut at these more expensive salons. So if we see an average looking girl hanging around a bunch of models we will tend to look for her better qualities to justify her being there. acne. A good dancer is immediately perceived to be more sexual. and inappropriate body hair. the more attractive you will be perceived to be. The lessons are usually available in group form and individual form. If you are not a naturally good dancer I would recommend taking some dance lessons. controlling dandruff. the more attractive the company you keep.Learn how to Dance If you want to attract the attention of the opposite sex during a night on the town you should consider learning how to dance. Tip #7. Therefore.Stay Well Kept and Well Groomed There are grooming tips that you can implement immediately that will drastically increase your attractiveness. This includes nose hair. It is much easier to let others guide us. Eliminating a unibrow alone can change the look of your face. We tend to look for reasons that will support our reality. cleaning wax out of your ears. ear hair. thus increasing their perceived attraction. The first is getting rid of all unwanted hair. And pluck your eye brows. You can usually find dance lessons locally.Hang Around Attractive People Humans look for short cuts when it comes to forming their own opinions. The same can be said for an average looking guy who walks into a bar with a beautiful woman… everyone in the bar will look for his positive qualities to reason it. Tip #8. facial hair (especially if you’re a girl).

Tip #10. watches. and scarves. and that you are confident in your ability to pull off wearing these things. the more attractive you will be appear to the opposite sex. My recommendation is to sample a few different brands and ask a member of the opposite sex to judge. Good use of accessories will make you more noticeable in a crowd. There is a term called “peacocking” which means purposely dressing in a way to draw attention to you.COM group classes. earrings. bracelets.The Best of TSBMAG. necklaces. you should seriously consider added some flash to your look. Adding these things to an outfit shows that you put thought into the way you look. Tip #9. glasses.Smell Good Smell is one of the brain’s strongest senses. And can spark animal like sexual attraction. 190 . hats. Although taste is subjective. the purchase of a good cologne or perfume is a great investment.Add Accessories to your Wardrobe If you take notice of most celebrities the one thing you’ll find in common with all of them is that they all make use of accessories. Accessories include belts. Once you purchase a fragrance make sure you put just the right amount of it on. There is a theory that pheromones play a huge part in sexual attraction and I would not argue with that at all. One thing is for certain. the better you smell. It may cost a few dollars but you will be amazed to see what kind of response you get next time you're asked out onto the dance floor. Accessories are items you can add to your outfit to give you some added flash. Too much of a good thing can be a turn off. Ideally you can have several different men or women give you their opinions on which one is the best. It is the sense that provokes the most intense emotions. While you may not choose to go that extreme.

and taking aerobics classes are beneficial as well. They seem almost elusive at times.. It is the most intense. Nothing beats jogging or running. although they looked SWEET! Unfortunately I let myself go over the last year… and we all know that while abs take awhile to build. What makes abs so desirable is that most people aren’t willing to put in the effort it takes to get them. running. they disappear in an instant. and effective method of burning calories. 1. which in turn bring up the value of anyone who takes off their shirt to display a six pack. For me though. These are no secrets… Because there is no short cut. But sometimes it's good to remember how basic it can be to get what we want… with the proper discipline. 2. jumping rope. the periods in my life where I’ve had abs… have always been more about the sense of personal accomplishment then about how they looked….. and Cardio: You can do a million crunches a day… but if you’ve got a solid layer of fat covering your abs you’ll never see them. Three to four sessions a week of intense jogging. Here are three tips that I’ve found helpful during the times in my life that I’ve reached my desired outcome. This makes people fascinated with them. hiking. or biking should be enough to get the process in gear. Swimming. efficient. the elliptical. the Stairmaster. Cardio. Proper Nutrition: I think a problem many people have is that once they start working out and burning calories they look at it as a free pass 191 . Cardio.Social Superstar 3 Tips for Abs of Steel Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/19/2008 Abs are like a prized possession. What people fail to realize is that the cardio needs to be intense. 20 minutes on the treadmill while reading a magazine and chatting on the phone won’t cut it. It will take a minimum of three to four days a week of intense cardio to burn the amount of calories needed to shed fat around your gut. Everyone knows that the trick to getting rid of fat is cardio.

you are on your knees. Not eating on time or at all is almost as bad as eating too much. You should keep protein intake high (approximately 50% of daily calories). kneel on your knees. But the contraction is the same. 30 degree contraction until you feel the abs contract. Cable Rope Crunches . carbs moderate (40%). pecs. and glutes. You need resistance to properly strengthen and build them. under your chin. The same goes for abdominals. hold for a couple seconds. Working out Your Abs: The biggest mistake that most people make when trying to build abdominal muscle is that they do sets of crunches or sit ups without any resistance. Would you work your biceps out with no resistance? Or your chest? Here’s an important key. You are now using your abs more to work against the leverage the dumbbell has created. But it is important to get something in you.The Best of TSBMAG. only. Don’t swing with the hips. and fats minimal (10%). Remember. then back up. you are not using the abs very much if you do. If you’re filling yourself up with shitty foods. forcefully contracting your abs on the way down. Stick with a heavy enough weight where you can handle 10-15 reps.COM to pig out.Grab a dumbbell. If you want proper abs development. 192 . Just a slight. Abs are muscles just like biceps. and bend downwards. you need to create enough resistance where your abs are forced to work. The Five Best Abs Exercises Weighted Crunches . but no more. or let it lie on your upper chest. Drink at least a gallon of clean water each day as well. The whole point of spending all that time burning calories is to start burning the excess fat. you need to add resistance (weight) to your abs exercises. It’s basically a crunch. and perform regular crunches. you’ll never get to the point where you’re body starts converting fat into energy. either hold it in front of your face. It will help in nutrient absorption and digestion and will help flush toxins from the body.Grab the triceps rope. I seriously know girls who finish their workouts and head to Hagen Daz for a Sundae. triceps.

do not swing all the way down. just far enough (30 degrees) to fully contract the abs. with your hands tucked under your butt. A couple months of intense workouts are a small price to pay for abs of steel. If at the same time you’re eating healthy and burning calories you should be seeing results in a couple months. If you’re unsure of proper nutrition or just need a good plan to follow Bodybuilding. They are effective at strengthening your core region. hold for a couple seconds.Lie flat on your back. Stability Ball Crunches .com has a really great free personal trainer course that will set you in the right direction. Wrap your feet around a small dumbbell. As you can see doing these exercises while adding some resistance will build muscle much quicker and in larger gains. Seated Abs Machine . and perform leg raises. These can be done on the end of a bench as well. This is very similar to Cable rope crunches. 193 .Working on the stability ball will incorporate balance into your abdominal work. Start with your feet about 6 inches from the ground.Once again. then back up.Social Superstar Weighted Leg Raises . then raise them about 12-16 inches from the ground and then back down slowly. which is your abs and lower back.

maybe a Pina Coloda… but there are certain rules you need to follow in social environments. looking at the girl next to me and thinking. Never order anything they are going to serve you in a plastic cup. No.COM A Manly Guide to Choosing Your Drink Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 There is a dirty rumor in the pick-up community claiming it is better to stay sober when gaming women in bars and clubs. The rules bend a little depending on the location… but certain ones are set in stone. or bottom shelf tequila drowned in sour mix… but you look cheap drinking 194 .The Best of TSBMAG. You tend to find this atrocity at bars that are near college campuses. You know… the $1 Miller Light draft or the $3 Margarita. do you? I mean all of my most memorable nights have involved me waking up. Your drink always serves two purposes: to get you hammered. Shit I hate the taste of booze. These plastic cup drinks are usually reserved for the drink special of the night. these are all part of the show. We can argue semantics… but I’ll just say you’ll never see Bobby Rio clinging to a club soda. If I drank alone I’d probably be sipping Bay Breezes or some kind of Dairies. You don’t think I actually enjoy the endless rounds of SoCo and lime shots I guzzle down. “what the hell happened last night?” So the real question isn’t should you or shouldn’t you drink when you hit the bars… the real question is what kind of drink will best serve your purpose. or the unnecessary twelve packs I always grab for the after party. These drinks not only taste like shit as they’re usually stale beer. Yea… you’re game tends to be a little tighter when you’re not red faced. wobbly. and to make you look cool in the process. and slurring your words… but you don’t have as much fun.

Rocks glasses are cool. Sex on the Beach. You think this one would be self explanatory but I never fail to see some schlep slurping on Mudslide wondering why he hasn’t been laid in a year. and you don’t want to have to respond “Fuzzy Navel. Let’s face it. Never order anything frozen or served in a novelty glass with a funny straw… unless you’re sitting on a beach in the Caribbean. Drinking one of the “vacation” drinks sends out the vibe that you don’t get out often. Buttery Nipple. In fact it says that your life sucks so bad that trolling around this shitty bar is actually an “event” for you. A safe bet is to order something your grandfather would have drank. Anything ordered on the rocks looks cool. Never.” Your first reaction may be to spit out “Michelob Ultra” but you need to regroup and imagine what your grandfather would have ordered. I would pay extra to have them pour it in a pint glass. men were men.Social Superstar them. 195 . rye and coke. It doesn’t much matter what’s in the glass so long as it’s clear or brown. even if I planned on drinking Miller anyway. rusty nail… they didn’t ruin the integrity of their vodka by splashing cranberry juice in it. or inevitably some girl will ask you what you’re drinking.” Generally. Never. Because someone is going to hear you order it. Back in his day. Manhattan. The only exception to this rule is ordering a Margarita at a Mexican joint. Remember clear or brown… I don’t care how much you liked the Big Lebowski it’s never acceptable to order a White Russian. and they drank scotch on the rocks. anything with a novelty name like Alabama Slammer. There will be times when you freeze like a deer in headlights when the bartender asks “what you drinking. What does it say to everyone that you will sacrifice the enjoyment of your drink to save a buck? Hell. or Kamikaze is off limits. Malibu Bay Breeze. And I don’t care how good you think it taste… you are never ever to order a Cosmo. The name of the drink is more important than what is inside it.

The Best of TSBMAG. But you must look cool in the process.COM So remember it is quite alright to get a little sauced when you hit the bars… in fact I even encourage it. 196 .

Social Superstar 7 Steps to aturally Boost Testosterone Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/09/2008 There seems to be a huge fascination with guys taking steroids lately. the side effects can be brutal in the short term… and deadly in the long term. Here’s the biology behind testosterone: 197 . I’m going to give you tips to naturally increase your testosterone. Instead of cheating and doing it the artificial way that will drain your wallet and health. While they would tell themselves it was going to be only one time… soon they became reliant on them and were doing cycle after cycle. Not only are steroids an expensive habit. This is not to say that your body couldn’t benefit from extra testosterone. Taking steroids is a coward’s way out that leads nowhere fast. I’ve seen many of my friends succumb to the lure of steroids. Benefits of increased testosterone’ * Increase in strength and muscle size * Body fat decrease * Increased sex drive and endurance * More energized and motivated * Decrease in bad cholesterol * Makes you more attractive to women Increasing testosterone can be a huge benefit to you. In addition to the gains in muscle mass many guys become addicted to the adrenaline rush of having excess testosterone flowing through their veins. Obviously the major reason being that the increase in testosterone most anabolic steroids produce causes extraordinary gains in muscle mass. and even a slight increase in its level will provide many amazing benefits. To put it bluntly. Testosterone is the most important muscle building hormone in your body.

Excessive alcohol consumption can drastically reduce testosterone levels. the brain releases a substance called Luteinizing Hormone. LH and DHEA then travel together to the testes where testosterone production begins. 7. cauliflower. 4. LH basically “tells” the body to start producing testosterone. These 7 steps will provide that natural boost in testosterone that will leave you feeling more healthy. Increase consumption of Essential Fatty Acids.COM First. Limit Cortisol production. Cortisol is produced during times of high stress or anxiety. Reduce Estrogen levels. Soy has been known to raise estrogen levels which decrease testosterone levels. cabbage.The Best of TSBMAG. It is best to keep your drinking to a minimum and try not to exceed more than three drinks in a night. lunges. sexual. If you follow these 7 steps you can avoid having to resort to sticking needles in your ass a couple days a week. Have more sex. or “LH” for short. fish. 5. bench presses. Cortisol is a catabolic hormone that will cause testosterone to plummet. 1. Eliminate Binge Drinking. 2. and attractive. You can reduce estrogen by eating more cruciferous vegetables like broccoli. 6. 198 . and turnips. vibrant. 3. and canola are a proven natural way to boost testosterone. You can also reduce estrogen by limiting the amount of soy protein you take in. flaxseed. olives. and this also raises testosterone. Sexual stimulation causes the body to increase the production of oxytocin which increases endorphin production (the “feelgood” chemical). It is also produced during times of lack of sleep. Once this occurs. These exercises include squats. the adrenal glands release DHEA into the bloodstream. Push yourself 110% at the gym. avocadoes. Reducing the levels of estrogen (the main female hormone) will greatly increase your testosterone. dead lifts. radishes. Exercises that put your muscles under the most amount of stress will force your body to produce more testosterone. dips. Testosterone can now be released into the bloodstream to perform its magic. Fill your work out with compound exercises. True gains in muscle and testosterone come when you push yourself to the limit at the gym. and military presses. The EFAs found in peanuts.

Think about how much more you would accomplish in life if you had an endless supply of energy. You’ll simply get fat and become lazier than before. Don’t feed your body junk. whole grain rice or even apples. Everything listed below will increase your energy level for the long term. cake and table sugar. We got home extremely late. or hit Dunkin Donuts for your fourth cup of coffee… these are all temporary fixes that will leave you even more depleted in the long run. You might not get that instant gratification that a Red Bull will give you. The carbs that you should be taking into your body should be complex carbohydrates such as whole grain bread. Continuously feed your body small amounts of complex carbohydrates to get the most out of your diet. Make sure you get enough fruits. but short lived. but over time you’ll slowly find you no longer need to flood your body with caffeine. Without it we are virtually useless.Social Superstar How to aturally Increase Energy Levels Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/16/2008 Last night I took my girl to the Bon Jovi concert at MSG. Energy is the fuel we all run on. Needless to say. After struggling to find the motivation to begin writing … I decided to hit 7-11 for my second Red Bull of the day. 5 Ways to Naturally Increase Your Energy As easy as it seems to pop a Stacker 3. After guzzling the Red Bull and feeling that instant. down a Red Bull. I was exhausted this morning. 199 . and it took me another hour to wind down enough to sleep. Make sure you consume complex carbohydrates and not just simple carbohydrates. 1. soda. Examples of simple carbohydrates would be candy. jolt of energy I decided to do some research into how I can naturally increase my energy level. vegetables. Nutrition. Simple carbohydrates create a short burst of energy that will simply wear off and leave you depressed. proteins and complex carbohydrates in your everyday diet.

2. Another great way to get bursts of nutrients that your body needs is by using a juicer. Get the right amount of sleep Everyone’s body is different. The enzyme then acts as a catalyst in the chemical reactions that transfer energy from the basic food elements to the body.The Best of TSBMAG. Modern diets are usually void of many of the key vitamins and minerals our bodies need. By taking a daily multi vitamin you can be sure you’ll be getting the daily recommended amount of all of them. or just taking a morning power walk around the park. * Working the body’s muscles which support healthy circulation and blood pressure. If you live an exceptionally active life style you might want to supplement with an additional B complex. * Increases the number of red blood cells in the body. The B vitamins act as coenzymes. 3. compounds that unite with a protein component called an apoenzyme to form an active enzyme. The fact is. most of us don’t exercise nearly as much as we should be. you can be taking a jog at the track. but on average we need about 7-8 hours of sleep a night. Even if you hate the idea of spending time in the gym. Conditioning Conditioning is your efficiency to move oxygen and blood to needed parts of the body. but it truly works wonders for energy. I actually went through a period of about six months where I had completely given up caffeine and replaced morning coffee with a homemade juice.COM In addition to proper diet you should be taking a multi vitamin every day. It gets messy and expensive. to better transport oxygen throughout the body. joining in a game of basketball or ultimate Frisbee. Conditioning takes place through daily exercise. I would advice picking up a decent juicer along with a book on good juicing recipes. It includes: * Strengthening the muscles involved in respiration in order to better move oxygen in and out of the lungs. What most people fail to realize is that even though you’ve 200 .

I find that when I stay in bed an extra hour or two in the morning. Motivation One of the surest ways to get you pumped full of energy is to get yourself in a completely motivated state. One of the ways that I’ve been doing that lately is by writing all of my goals on index cards. last night after lying in bed at about 1:00 am. Knowing what your goals are is not always enough to motivate some of us. I tossed and turned. There is no hiding from them.Social Superstar been lying in your bed for 8 hours does not mean you got 8 hours of solid sleep. not sleeping pills. and to my television. I said supplements. I am forced to stare at my goals. I would advise you to avoid sleeping more than the recommended 8 hours. 4. Everywhere I look from the minute I wake up. adjusting the pillow every 3 minutes… before finally falling asleep at about 2:30. If you still find that you’re having trouble getting a thorough night sleep you might want to take some supplements that support sleep patterns such as ZMA and Melatonin.lie down an hour earlier. Using myself as an example. A good way to stay motivated is to create a picture album or collage of your goals. If you know you have a tendency to toss and turn for an hour before finally falling asleep. I tend to be lifeless the rest of the day. limit your beverage intake to two hours before bedtime. the body you want. If you find you have to continually go to the bathroom throughout the night. These pictures can include pictures of the car you want. Being forced to look at your goals forces you to think about what you have to do to achieve them. to my bathroom mirror. You need to make sure that you are getting 8 hours of restorative sleep. Remember. and then too cold. You also want to avoid getting too much sleep. found myself too hot. In this photo album or collage paste pictures of things you’re striving for. I’ve taped the index cards to my computer. Sometimes we need to be motivated by the promise of extreme pleasure or the fear of extreme pain. the girl you 201 . got up several times to use the bathroom.

Jim Rohn. There are a couple songs I listen to over and over again at the gym. do a great job of pumping me up. Music is another great way to create an anchor. the first thing I do is listen to one hour of one of these speakers on my IPod. even on days I skip listening to the audio. and force yourself to see it daily. Anchoring This is something that I’ve been using lately to great success. For some people the pain of seeing themselves look less than desirable will motivate them to get off their ass. I am naturally more energized in the morning. 202 . If you listen to a certain song continually during times you feel completely motivated… you’ll be able to recreate that feeling just by hearing the song. the career you want… Anything that will inspire you and get your mind racing. I have been flooding my mind with motivational audio programs like Tony Robbins. take a picture of yourself in a swim suit.The Best of TSBMAG. If you’re trying to lose weight. I’ve done this with working out. you can post a picture of yourself with your less than ideal body weight. These speakers. Every morning. and Jack Canfield. On the opposite side of that. If you follow these 5 tips you should be able to slowly wean yourself off the Red Bull. when I hear these songs I get that burst of motivation I usually feel on the treadmill. especially Tony Robbins. 5.COM want. I will make sure I play these songs while I’m busting my butt on cardio as they always push me to go the extra mile. I’ve found that since I’ve gotten used to being pumped up in the morning from the audio… that now. What has been remarkable is that even away from the gym.

replace it with more so you can stay style fat! After you have everything organized. shirts. • • • They always wear (piece of clothing) because it goes with everything A majority of their wardrobe is the med to their personal interests Most of the stuff is old and anything new was a onetime purchase (event) You Need Some Clarity So you want to dress cool and be hip? It all starts with understanding what you’re working with and getting rid of what you don’t wear. When you’re running out of something. not season. pants. shorts. I mean all of them. t-shirts. There is a reason that you do this first and you will understand by the next article in the series. hats. or better yet their closet.Social Superstar How to Redo Your Wardrobe Written by Michael Stoute Original Published: 07/24/2008 This is a 3 part series I am writing about how to redo your wardrobe. A common problem is that men put things away because it’s “winter” clothes and then forget about them over time. One of the biggest problems I see when I look at what guys wear. jackets. Organize by Type Get all your clothes together. Go down stairs or in the attic and pull out everything you own for all seasons and events. You have to manage your wardrobe just like your food supply. suits and underwear. Yes. shoes. this article is about how to throw away your clothes to get ready to redo your wardrobe. is that there is little or no synergy with the entire wardrobe. This makes things hard for a number of reasons. sport coats. Now organize everything by type. never forget the underwear… 203 .

then print them out on a cheap color printer so that you can just cut them out like photos. Mix and Match I want you to go through all your remaining clothes and see what actually goes together. Now I want you to either write down or take pictures (preferred) of what you currently have and wear on a regular basis. If you take digital pictures.The Best of TSBMAG. either with photos. You have also looked at all the remaining items and studied them. 204 . What’s’ Left? If you haven’t been clothes shopping too much lately then you are probably left over with a relatively small amount of clothing. Homework Study the remaining clothes or pictures of them and get ready for Part 2. then you have already gone through your entire wardrobe and thrown away what you didn’t need following the process I outlined. The only way this will work is if you get rid of everything you don’t wear so that you can see what you actively have to work with. pen and paper or in your head Now it’s time to move into the second phase. If you don’t wear too many colors (like most men) this will not be hard and may not even be necessary. Let’s start with colors first. If you are looking at something and saying “but I have always had this” or “this is my lucky t-shirt”. Most people only wear 15-25 different items on a regular basis yet everyone has a closet full of crap.COM Throw it Out! Go through each pile and start throwing out everything you don’t wear. Part 2 If you read the previous post in this series “The Throw Away”. These are your staple outfits that you currently wear. dump it or wash it and put it in a box somewhere that you will bury as a time capsule for aliens to find in the future.

but before you go I want you to remember the 5 outfits that you are working with already and/or take pictures of them with you. The reason this part requires money is simple. then this is a clue where the weakest part of your wardrobe lies. Try to make 5 different outfits out of what you have. If you don’t have any decent jeans. always leaving you with clean clothes! (+ $250) Now that you have thrown away unused clothes and picked out some outfits with the remaining. The ideal set of different outfits is 10 in my opinion. $250 is a fair amount for a man to spend on his wardrobe in one day. it’s time to put on the finishing touch on your new wardrobe. Your initial investment… Take some of your hard earned money and get ready to shop. but just think of it as a kick start to your new image. Think about the weaker points of your wardrobe and what you need most.Social Superstar Look at what you currently have and see what your outfit possibilities are. This way you can wear something different for 10 days and do laundry every 5 days. The reason I wanted you to make 5 different outfits is because you want to be able to “recycle” what you wear every week so that you are not wearing the same thing every day and for laundry reasons as well. You should be able to find 3-4 or more nice things for around $75$100. I rarely buy things full price and I always visit the clearance section of every store I go to first. clothes cost money and you will always have to invest money into your wardrobe to keep it updated. 205 . Men can typically wear the same or similar jeans over and over without any problem so my guess is that you probably are going to take a bulk of this money and spend it on tops. If you used any of the clothing items in more than one outfit. The jeans should run you about $50$75… Shirts and Tops To start things off you want to pick up 3-4 new shirts/sweaters or some kind of top. I would say go to Marshalls or some other “Yesterdays Fashion” outlet and look through the clearance racks. I suggest going to the GAP and buying 2 nice pairs of boot cut jeans to add to your current wardrobe.

Same thing with clothes shopping except you are constantly looking for things that will add to and extend your existing wardrobe.COM Clothes Shopping is like Food Shopping Remember while shopping at the store to keep your current wardrobe inventory in mind. So check out what you already have before spending a lot of money.The Best of TSBMAG. Comfort is so important with shoes and I urge you to make sure they are comfortable or you will never end up wearing them. Take your time and pick out a nice pair of shoes that are not too flashy so that you can wear them with almost anything. Shoes are a different story. 206 . If you have to buy a new pair I would suggest trying on a lot of different kinds with a pair of jeans on to see which ones look and feel the best. Before buying a pair of shoes I would look through your closet for any old shoes you may have forgotten about. For sneakers. Shoes and Sneakers With the reaming money I would like you to buy a new pair of sneakers or shoes. Adidas. Stay away from the high end brands for now unless you can afford them of course. Shoes that are made well will last and if they fall apart can usually be fixed. whatever fits your current lifestyle better. take a step back and think of how many other things you own and how this shirt can be meshed in with your current clothing arsenal. I would recommend something in the Converse. You might find a pair or two of decent leather shoes that you can just take to the shoe shop and get shined and fixed up. They tend to stay in style through all of the different fashion cycles. I like to compare clothes shopping to food shopping because when you go food-shopping you are always thinking of ways to maximize what you currently have in your fridge and cabinets. or Puma family. buy the nice button down shirt because is not so flashy and will blend well with your other outfits therefore allowing you to wear it 2-3 times over a 3 weeks period. Don’t buy that crazy shirt because you will wear it once every 3 weeks and feel like a pimp. If you are looking at a cool shirt.

In the previous two articles we systematically removed clothes you no longer wear and then preceded with a plan to kick start your new wardrobe with a small amount of money. Systems and Schedules The easiest way to keep a nice wardrobe going is to build it in baby steps. then they typically go home and realize that these new items don’t fit in to well with their current wardrobe and get frustrated. “Pea cocking” without looking like an idiot 207 . Most men will go shopping for clothes every once in a while and just buy a few things that look good. I will talk about how to constantly increase your wardrobe at a moderate pace so you don’t go broke and how to “peacock” (stand out) with items no matter what your age or profession. Part 3 This is the 3rd and final installment of the How to Redo Your Wardrobe series. In this part of the series. As your wardrobe gets bigger you will be able to throw in more “loud” items. Split up the money so you spend around $25 a week on say a new shirt or pair of pants. keep mental notes of what you already have in your closet. Just because an item of clothing is nice and looks good in the store isn’t enough to buy it. There is a time and a place to add a “peacock” aspect to it and I will explain how in the final part of the series. It has to mesh well with what you already have for you to get the most value out if it. This means you have to go shopping 3-4 times a month. If you follow this method when buying clothes you will have more outfits than you can think of as time goes on. Let’s say you are willing to spend $100 a month to finance your wardrobe (which is not a lot). You have to keep that food shopping mentality I talked about in the previous article of the series. but in the beginning keep thinks basic using solid colors and common styles.Social Superstar And always remember to keep in mind what you already have including what you buy during this process. adding new items one at a time. With this $100 I would be looking to buy 3 to 4 new items a month. but I would still suggest only buying 1-2 items at a time. You can up the monthly allowance if you like. When you are out shopping. Constantly be buying things that will fit in with what you already have.

Great examples of this were certain brands and t-shits when I was young. You don’t want to be the person wearing all the different trends because you will look like you are trying too hard. but still ugly as sh*t. he he What I am basically saying is that as a young person with no job. If you are constantly buying this trendy crap then soon you will have a wardrobe like a clown.. great for Kino now that I think of it. the playing field is open to almost anything in the style department. Just remember that “staple” items are needed no matter what. stuck in one style because if the people you hang with or just lost altogether and are still wearing the clothes your parents bought you for birthdays. Styles with young adults change so quickly that I suggest keeping things simple and looking for some trendy items. you have to go with the trend at times to “peacock” and demonstrate that you know what’s up… When you buy trendy items. On the other hand. As for the young professionals out there. Have plenty of solid shirts and pants that you can use when wearing your “trendy” item(s). BUM Equipment was huge when I was in HS and that sh*t is UGLY! Then there were those heat activated fabrics that changed colors when you touched it. if you don’t already. This is the time where you are going to be experimenting with a lot of things in life so why not your wardrobe too. You may be wearing a lot of different styles.COM Pea cocking is a term that has become associated with men adding certain items to their wardrobe to stand out. Having these “staple” items will allow you to evolve with the trends while maintaining a nice foundation for your entire wardrobe. Age 17-21 This is the age range where you are probably all over the place with finding yourself and an image.The Best of TSBMAG. you can’t even wear it anymore. The problem with this concept is that everyone is different and therefore has to “peacock” in a different way. 208 . Wherever you are in this phase it doesn’t matter. I feel most of the problem centers around age difference and profession and I will illustrate how you can “peacock” no matter who or where you are in life.. I will break this down in 2 separate categories. make sure that they can fit in with what you currently have and aren’t so crazy that when they fade out.

I actually think this is the easiest one to “peacock” out of all the following sections due to the fact you will probably be wearing more clothes in general. jacket and tie or at a minimum. not the cufflink itself. It gives you that full knot that you see in the men’s fashion ads. I want to take a quick moment to mention that when having to wear a tie every day. but it looks so sweet when done right. there are 3 or more distinct ways to tie the knot. I have yet to see a better knot that has more girth.Now I know what you may be saying. Sport Jackets This is one of my favorite items of clothing and can be done really right or really wrong. If you haven’t noticed yet. Stay away from pattern shirts with ties unless you are absolutely sure it looks good. shirt and tie. He he… When picking out ties for patterns and colors I tend to stay with solids and thick stripes. So if you plan to buy some nice cufflinks. you may want to reevaluate your alpha male goals. I always go with a Double Windsor and so should you! It is by far the hardest knot to tie.Social Superstar Age 21-30 Professional You are the type of guy that has a nice job where you have to dress in a suit. which will come with time young Skywalker… Cufflinks . Ties . I tend to stay away from the crazier designs of things and keep to basics. clean classy and professional. If you are a tie freak and own a bunch of wacky designs and stuff then you may want to pick up a few nice silk solids to balance you out. If you are working a job where you have a dress code like this and make crappy money. The problem with cufflinks is that you need to have special shirts to wear them with. plan on buying a few new shirts to go with them. your shirts for the most part should be solid colors. Most men don’t realize how versatile the tie can really be…For instance. The act of wearing the cufflinks is pea cocking. I am also going to assume that you have some cash in your pocket to go out and accessorize with. cufflinks are for when I wear a tux? Wrong! Yes they are formal. Do the same with your cufflinks. but they have been worn for years in regular suits.The tie is one of my favorite items to peacock in the professional look. Some guys don’t realize that a sport coat is entirely 209 .

I own slip on shoes and I do like them. Don’t forget to wear nice socks and a matching belt! No god dam white socks!!!! Age 21-30 Business Casual and Outside of Work Now let’s say that you work in a nice place but its business casual and/or you are outside of work. When picking out sport coat styles I would again keep it simple. Sport coats are items that are meant to stand alone and are made with fabrics that are easier to match up with common pants. The simple fact that you don’t have to tie a slip on combined with the laziness factor of men has caused this style to be played out. As far as the style of the shoe. This is almost the same principle that I talked about earlier with the sport coat fabrics. it will either look cheap or you will only be able to wear it once in a while. It is true that some suit jackets can double as a sport coat. Forget the designs on the back with that “Ed Hardy” type look. Funny thing is that you see guys wearing jackets from their bar mitzvah’s and communion’s with a hoodie and it looks stupid. Real men “peacock” shoes with class and sedulity. There are a ton of different fabrics for sport coats and the more you shop the more you will discover. Being that you won’t likely be wearing a tie or 210 . Instead look for cool fabrics to peacock. When dressing professional. Lately it is big to wear a sport coat with a hoodie under it and I think it looks pretty sharp. Don’t worry.The Best of TSBMAG. I would suggest wearing simple styles with nice textures. women will notice the smallest pattern and look…after all they addicted to shoes themselves. Loud shoes often scream cheesy and/or make you look like a fool. Shoes Shoes are unique part of any man’s wardrobe and they can say a little or a lot about you. but over all I feel they are a little less dressy than the laced styles besides the fact they are getting played out. Just go to any store and walk around touching the fabrics in the suits section and then go over to the sport coats and see the difference for yourself. I prefer laces to slip on types because I feel they just look better. but this situation is pretty rare due to the material and look of suits.COM different than the jacket that comes with a suit.

This big cuff reminds me a 211 . “Wow. I have plenty of unique “no name” button downs that are probably my strongest items and they were purchased at stores like Marshalls and Kohl’s. My personal favorite. So let’s talk button downs… There are many different styles and brands of button down shirts but in general I feel most of them look the same and will get you thrown into the mix with the other cookie cutter button down styles. make it a nice phat one. When being casual the rules change and the power shifts to other items of your wardrobe.Social Superstar sport coat. Shirts In the previous section I mentioned to keep you shirts as solids and use the tie and other accessories to accomplish your James Bond “peacock” style. I mention Ben Sherman because I like their stuff.Their designs are unique and dressy at the same time. If you are wearing a nice pair of pants that feel great from the material. this allows you another opportunity to add a little “peacock” to it. if not grow up! Touch the clothes as you look through them. If you are going to go with a cuff in the pants. say 1 ½ inches give or take with your height. Ben Sherman…. feel the difference. Pants and Slacks Fabrics. they are too old man-ish and hard to keep pressed. I am going to focus on pea cocking other items I may have told you to tone down in the above section. Since most of these pants will need to be tailored. Being able to pick out unique styles is a skill you hone over time and mixing your wardrobe up like this will keep you from being pinpointed as a “BRAND” whore. you will be surprised. Fabrics… I can’t say it enough. Fabrics. If you are a magician then you can wear pants with flames and naked girls. those pants look comfortable!” I would also recommend staying away from pleated designs. When buying these types of shirts I almost always go with a designer and/or stick to a few. Stick with a nice smooth looking nice feeling choice. women will notice and they will probably touch you just because of it. Take some chances with it.

I think its bad ass… In closing: I hope you have really enjoyed this series and especially this last installment which I worked pretty hard on. I am sure that I may have missed some things or not fully answered your questions so please leave any in the comments below. Game On! 212 .The Best of TSBMAG.COM little of that gangster look from the days of Tommy Gun.

Most people will generally jump at the lower bunk… (I was one of the late hung-over fools who got the top bunk) But in reality. Son.Social Superstar Winning the Day 1 College Roommate War Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/28/2008 It’s all fair in war… and that is exactly what move in day at the dorms is. all walking around like clueless tourists… And then you’ll walk into your closet sized dorm room… And your nerdy ass roommate will have already jam packed his stuff into the limited closet space… and even worse… he’ll have claimed the better bed. fight the traffic and commotion of another thousand underclassmen pushing shopping carts full of their shit. computers… You’ll get to campus around two. you’ll probably want to spend your last day in your hometown boozing it up with your high school buddies into the wee hours of the night…. covering the walls with your Pink Floyd and Bob Marley posters… just know… he would do the same thing to you in an instant. Yes. Sure. No matter how big of a dick you feel for claiming the best bed. when it comes to move in day… You need to beat your roommate to the punch. most closet space. posters. it may sound cruel… sure. If you walk in and find that there are bunk beds… you have instant decision to make. TV. there should probably be a more fair way of choosing… but the reality is… the early bird gets the worm. there are drawbacks to both: Downsides to the bottom bunk: 213 . Mom and dad will wake you up at noon or so… hung over you’ll start loading the cars up with your microwave.

If the guy above you is a raging drunk… there is a good chance after a night of hard partying you're likely to get an unwanted golden shower. he wants to watch the Mets… it’s 214 . entertainment. Every time you wake up to piss in the middle of the night you’ve got to climb down half asleep. Even with the downsides of the bottom bunk… always choose it. If someone is drunk and lost… and your room is open. and want something. Basically. and mooch off his big screen TV and 27 inch computer monitor… Always fill the room with as much of your shit as possible. you want to watch the Yankee game. anytime you’re in bed. When your roommate climbs down from the top he’ll probably wind up stepping on your head out of spite.COM • • • • • You clunk you head on the supports under the top bunk if you sit up too quickly. Chances are you’re roommate will have wanted it… This gives you a great bargaining tool later. you’ve got to climb your ass down and get it. they’ll crawl into the bottom bunk because the top is too high. and computers… As tempting as it sounds to let him haul all his stuff to the dorms. For instance. People will always be sitting on your bed when they come in your room.The Best of TSBMAG. If you’re a raging drunk. you’re liable to roll off the bed in shitfaced confusion. As much as you will both try to pretend everything is equal… the guy who owns it unconsciously has final say over how it’s used. As for appliances. Downsides to the top bunk: • • • • You need to be able to climb in the dark.

you’ll get the better bed. guzzle the Red Bull. These are not things you want to negotiate. Remember the first week of college is crucial for establishing yourself as the party guy…. How to be sure you beat him to the room First. hop in the shower. Set you alarm clock for 7am and have 2 cans of Red Bull waiting by the bed. 215 . The minute the alarm clock goes off. So the sooner you finish the move in bullshit… the sooner you can begin to conquer your campus. In the meantime. If he doesn’t have any. you’re free to decorate the room as you please. This simple line will give him a false sense of security. The last thing you want is some dweeb hanging pictures his parents brought him back from their last trip to Key West. you’ll have all your shit packed and ready to go the night before.Social Superstar your TV… he’ll be checking scores on the internet. Getting there early provides several benefits… you’ll get better parking and fight less of a crowd getting to your dorm. taking first crack at the hotties on your floor. You tell him that you’ll be getting back late from a trip that afternoon and probably won’t make it to campus until later in the evening. and more importantly. while you’re watching Jeter and company on your big screen. chances are you’ll speak on the phone a week or two before move in day to discuss what both of you are bringing. He will feel like he’s got all the time in the world to mosey down to campus. you have all the time in the world to socialize later. and amaze your parents at how energetic and excited you are to get to campus. and to do a formal introduction to each other. It is crucial during this conversation that you bluff. If you’ve got a lot of posters… bring them all.

this is an all time low. was getting married in Buenos Aires. I could write an entire post on the bachelor party alone. but the party isn’t the point of the story so I’ll sum it up quickly. But what’s done is done….COM The Buenos Aires Hooker Juice Incident Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/28/2007 I want to prelude this story by saying that this one of those stories that makes me question my own moral character. even by Bobby Rio standards. Jake. and we are shouting derogatory things at him while harassing him physically. kidnap John from his apartment. John is blindfolded and mouth duck taped. he fell in love with an Argentinean girl. so I didn’t necessarily mind having her tag along on this trip. wine. although not happy to be spending their first night in Argentina alone. and the rest is history. Force him into woman’s clothing and throw him in the back of a van. I was still within the first 3 months with Kate. Jake. but the both of us were in the thick of relationships and our girls jumped at the chance to have a romantic getaway in Buenos Aires. Out of all our friends. Two years ago a college friend of mine. my girl. and whatever bottle of hard liquor that is currently being passed around. had no choice but to go along with it. We had arrived just in time!! The girls. John. The entire drive in the van we are guzzling beers. on the other hand. We had both been to South America enough times to know not to bring sand to the beach. At one point they put duct tape over John’s hairy nipples. He had lived there the past 4 years.The Best of TSBMAG. Needless to say we were both ecstatic when we get a call from John’s cousin the first night down there informing us that his bachelor party was tonight. The bachelor party was the one of the craziest experiences I’ve ever seen. He invited a bunch of us to the wedding. only my friend Jake and I decided to go. I mean. had been with his girl close to two years and was miserable that he wouldn’t be able to tag some new Spanish ass. and although he had planned to move back to the US. and I. and then rip it 216 . His Spanish friends were downright cruel. A bunch of John’s Spanish friends. Argentina.

(The beauty of 3rd world laws) This part of the story climaxed when we arrive in a park that was filled with Transsexual prostitutes. and go home. The strip bar was a full frontal festival of beautiful busty Latinas…or as I like to call it. he turns to me and says “They want us to meet them at their apartment. involving a lot of sightseeing. We are sitting on a couch with two of the strippers listening to them tell us how much they love our blonde hair and blue eyes (I think that's code for “I love your money”) Anyway.” 217 . heaven. They gave me the address. I am honestly pretty content at this point with Kate. but “what the hell. Our plan is to just meet them for lunch or something. They say they can’t leave the bar till 4. We take the numbers and leave. and I can see how much Jake needs this. I’ve never seen so many trannies in my life. Unfortunately most of John’s friends were married and were more excited about the kidnapping part of the night. Jake and I had other plans. then the titty bar. We take John out of the car and tie him to a fence and pretend to drive away. let them grope us. All the while the stripper’s phone numbers are just burning a hole in our pockets. So I agree to hang out with the strippers. The next couple days of the trip are quite civil. and after some back and forth conversation in Spanish that I couldn’t understand. Finally the 4th day into the trip Jake can’t take it anymore… He say’s we have to go meet the strippers.Social Superstar off. wedding preparations.” he says. But I’m a good friend. on what was supposed to be a romantic getaway with my girlfriend. and am in no rush to go sneaking around with strippers. then we loaded him into the van and headed to the strip bar. Jake calls the stripper. just flirt a little bit.” Meeting them at their apartment was a little more than I bargained for. Then they open up the back of the van and make John (still in women’s clothing) run behind the van tied to a leash. Jake who speaks some Spanish asks them if they want to hang out tonight. and getting dragged to every clothing store in the city so that our girls can take advantage of 3rd world bargains. We let him sweat it out for about a half hour. big dinners. leaving him to be ravaged by Planet of the Shemales. “Just for kicks. but give us their numbers and make us promise to call them this week.

I walk toward the desk where the Madame asks me for $35. We make up a couple fake names. Jake and I sit and give each other little looks. It is immediately clear upon entering the apartment that we have just entered a classic South American Brothel. and are trying to gauge the other’s desire to go through with this. I just shrug. My stripper.. a television set. We are both in shock. I’m slightly embarrassed by the situation and the fact that a language barrier prevents us from communicating. Her body’s alright. There is a Madame sitting at a desk. and wait for my change. (Yes $35…And our girlfriends thought they were getting bargains in the malls) I hand her about 100 pesos.The Best of TSBMAG.COM We make up some excuse about going to meet John for one last guys only luncheon. I’m really not sure how I’m supposed to proceed with the scenario. if by stripper you mean prostitute. and a night stand. The girls look at this as an opportunity to go on a shopping binge without us. disappointed. A cab drops us off in front of a large brick building. who is grinning like a kid in a candy store. Jake pulls out his paper with the phone numbers. After a minute of stern deliberation it is settled. confused. and reads two names. and don’t seem to mind our departure. I am quite winded by the time we reach the top and barely notice the 2 two middle aged white men that just exited the apartment we were about to enter. The Madame tells us to take a seat. disgusted. who asks us our names when we enter. I look at Jake. Jake looks at me with a “what the fuck” type of look. We stand outside the building giggling nervously like a couple of giddy teenagers. I feel a little… I don’t want to say sleazy… you know… just a little creped out… but she’s wearing only a robe and I keep hearing my dick say “follow her boy… faster…damnit!!!” A minute later I’m in a dingy little room filled with a small bed.. comes out of a room and hand signals me to follow her. We muster up the courage and walk in. roughly $40. She asks us who we are here to see. except for a really nasty c-section scar. We have to walk up 8 floors of stairs to get to their apartment. She is drenched in hooker perfume (presumably to cover up the smell of her previous appointment) 218 . My prostitute’s face is a little less pretty than I remember. We will fuck the whores!!! My fake name is called first.

I can’t show up at our hotel smelling like a whore.. shower.Social Superstar She is smiling and rubbing her titties under the robe. My performance is adequate. I back away. I want to get the fuck out of there… but I don’t want to sit in the lobby waiting for Jake. She tries to kiss me on the lips. my dick is quite hard. Jake starts sniffing me. “I need a shower badly. you fucking reek of hooker perfume” “Fuck! That bitch was drenched in the shit.” I attempt to smell myself several times. And he wins. I get out of the bed and begin putting my clothes on. He moves forward and smells me again. I think she is telling me she loves me. 3. Show up smelling like a whore. borrow clothes.. We both hurry out of there… through the halls. Now that I’ve cum she looks even less pretty and the c-section scar looks even uglier and nastier. Deny and play dumb. After briefing one another on the gory details of the last hour. But oddly. I may throw up. She is running her hands through my hair and licking my ear. down the staircase… out the door… and smack into the cold light of day. “This ain’t fucking funny man.. Buy some cologne and drench myself in enough of it to override hooker scent. My prostitute is whispering something in Spanish. and hope Kate doesn’t notice I’m wearing a different outfit. if not stellar. I try to gesture that I have a headache. I am no longer turned on. “Dude. I am probably the first guy under forty she’s fucked all day. She takes my hand and puts it on her breast. She wants to cuddle… We lay there with about twenty minutes to kill.” “You need to burn those clothes.. He gives me a nod. Her perfume is giving me a headache so I have my face buried in the pillow. Jake meets me in the lobby a few minutes later. She is happy.. 2. Call John see if I can go to his place. “ We go through my options: 1.. I feel extremely dirty. too” Jake is laughing. 219 . She just keeps trying to tongue me.

The Best of TSBMAG. We need to take care of this as fast as possible as the girl’s are surely beginning to wonder what's taking us so long. No one wants to ask me why I smell like I’ve taken a bath in cheap perfume. I take off my shirt and start washing my chest and stomach. John’s fiancé answers the door. He smells his wife (like she might be the one drenched in whore juice) John then walks out of the bathroom and immediately blurts out “What's that smell?” Jake points at me. We jump out of the cab and ring John’s bell repeatedly. She introduces us as “John’s amigos de Estados Unidos”.. I ask John if I can use the bathroom. I shout “can I come over for a minute” into the phone. I am stunned. My mind is blank for an excuse as to why I smell like whore. She almost chokes. I try to hide my stench behind Jake. I am now completely naked scrubbing myself with a sponge that was in his shower. He shouts “Sure” Jake and I take a cab to John’s apartment.” “I don’t fucking care… “ 220 . his fiancé there… but so is Mariella’s mother and father. I can only imagine the conversation that is taking place outside the door. neck… fuck it. I point back at Jake. Once we get in we notice that not only is Mariella. “You guys went to meet those strippers didn’t you?” “I’ll explain later… can you please get me some clothes to wear?” “Yea… but you’re bigger than me. We’re buzzed in and quickly rush up three flights of stairs. John comes to the door. face. Everyone in the apartment is completely uncomfortable with the situation. Her mother comes over and kisses me on the cheek. She wants to introduce us to them.COM I call John from a pay phone. I start to put my clothes back on and realize that it would be defeating the purpose of washing if I put the smelly clothes back on. I lean out the door and call for John. She grabs my hand and leads me toward them. I try to explain my situation but the reception is horrible. She motions for us to come in. but it's too late. Her father gets a whiff of the smell and starts sniffing suspiciously. I reluctantly enter. Once I get in the bathroom I start washing my hands. They’re going to be a little tight.. I try to wave to avoid a handshaking and kiss.

Kate is waiting for me. Mariella and her parents are still in total shock and barely acknowledge me when I wave goodbye. I make up an excuse about spilling spaghetti sauce all over myself at lunch… had to go to John’s to change. I feel too guilty to speak. 221 . She gives me the “fuck me eyes” I try to tell her that I’m tired. She is lying in bed… relaxing after a hard day shopping. Just my luck… she’s horny. But the jeans make me look like an 80’s rocker. So I just go along with it. She starts nibbling my ear. I exit the bathroom. “Are you wearing perfume?” she asks. They are a quite tight on me. The shirt is not bad. We finally get back to the hotel. She pulls off me for a second. She believes my story. She is happy to see me.Social Superstar I put on Johns clothes. Not in the mood… but apparently my tight eighties rocker jeans are turning her on. Then she notices the clothes I am wearing. and in an effort to avoid any more embarrassing conversation I quickly announce that we have to meet our girlfriends back at the hotel. I thank John for the clothes and grab Jake and we bounce. I am afraid I might blurt something stupid out. I hesitantly enter my room.

and a liver that still has not forgiven you. You were here two years ago but that trip was during your “Black Label” phase. which left you with very few clear memories. “Where you from?”A Brazilian guy is shouting in your ear. hiked up for extra effect. who wakes up early and takes a jog on the beach.” so you don’t worry. A street kid puts out his hand for coins as he passes you by. and then hits up a local museum. and make your way to the bar to grab a Bohemia and take in the view. The kind of guy. Yet. You hang up the phone and pay the fifteen Reas for the call. He curses you out in Portuguese. has fruit for breakfast. maybe plays a game of tennis. who on vacation. You’ve always envisioned yourself as the kind of guy. or was it Europa? You were already pretty tight when you arrived. No sign of the blonde and her friend that you were supposed to meet. Your highly acclaimed novels are still buried beneath dirty clothes in your suitcase.” This morning when you called your mother you felt ashamed. and a clan of scantily clad Brasileras shaking their stuff on stage to the pulse of the music. “No tengo nada” you lie. a vaguely tribal feel. Now that you’ve made your token phone calls you feel like you have just been to Confession at church. well-reviewed. Your night began at Amozoa. Bits and pieces are forming shapes in your mind as you sip an espresso and watch the girl’s parade down the strip in their short denim skirts.The Best of TSBMAG. novels for this trip. sipping a glass of Cabernet. You used phrases like “Nice and relaxing” “Catching up on work” “Plowing through novels” “Good restaurants "and “often lonely” to describe the trip. reads Hemingway at a table outside a café along the water. 222 . You don’t know at exactly what point you deviated from your “ideal self.COM Fortaleza ights Part 1 Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/14/2007 You bought three new. you confessed nothing. But Brasileras have no concept of “on time. You are still riding the adrenaline rush of last night’s Red Bull and Cialis fueled comet trail of adventure. You entered to pounding bongo drums.

He calls over probably the only two ugly girls in the club.” you scream back.” you tell him. You run your hand from her ass up the curves of her abdomen. “Estados Unidos. The guy seems genuinely pleased with himself. You grab her ass like you own it. They both have penciled in eye brows and slicked back jet black hair. and visions of “the blonde” naked were like piranhas gnawing on your brain. Marijuana?” “Only chicas” you say. But jerking off in Brazil seemed like an Oxymoron. You twirl her around and do a once over. All could have been avoided if you had only jerked off when the desire arose earlier in the day. “I’ll find you a good one. Thinking it might be a pick pocket you swat it away. You decide to do a lap and see if your blonde and friend have arrived. even when they’re speaking English. But your “well raised” childhood taught you to never be rude. It’s not like you don’t have options. What you like?” “No necassario.” You walk back to the bar and order your first of the night. it is certain that they are prostitutes.Social Superstar You wonder if you have the word “gringo” tattooed on your forehead. You turn to the girl and go Cave Man on her. You’re not sure if you welcome company at this time. As you crack open your second Bohemia you wonder if you have the energy to go through with the night. You were quite enjoying your own blurred thoughts and not quite enticed by the idea of engaging conversation with a guy who obviously wants something from you. For some reason you always feel compelled to speak your broken Portuguese. You politely thank their pimp but tell him “I already have a chica. Maybe a Red Bull will help you “man up. and you wonder if they could be transvestites. She shakes her finger “no” but her smile lets you know it okay to continue. when you near her breast she grabs your hand and places it back on her ass. You wonder if maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if the blonde doesn’t show up. “You like Coca. The girl/guy things are giving you “fuck me” eyes and while their gender is not clear. “You like?” he asks you.” You check your watch. You feel a hand graze you butt. 223 . A petite light skinned Brasilera giggles.

the sixteen year old debutants. And if they don’t? You look around. the barely clothed “garotas de programma” putting their pussy on display. the skinny. Fucking “gringos” in their Brasilia Soccer jerseys. The one that can keep a girl laughing when she has no clue what you’re saying. Your swagger has returned. Sex is all around you. What do you know? Another Bohemia has bit the dust. It comes in all forms. They’ll come. When you come out of the stall you wish you had given it an extra couple of shakes as you notice a nice wet spot near your crotch. The Red Bull rush has begun. never have kids. Throw you off balance a bit. the fucked up X heads. the crazy. the one with the shaved head. Presenting your best self. tell her “it was a pleasure” and make your way through the crowd. Back to the bar. never raise a family. Yes. You’re about to head back into that bathroom to dry off when you spot the blonde and her friend on the dance floor surrounded by guys. You kiss this one on the cheek.COM “Eu Gusto” you tell her. But not now. But first a much need bathroom break.The Best of TSBMAG. the fat. that when the friend arrived unexpectedly. foreshadowing all of the reasons that you’ll most likely never get married. you think. The boom. the long swanky model types with heartbreaking cheek bones. pointing at buildings…works every time. Those far away eyes. you think. the beautiful. The self. Sit tight my friend. You are a fucking Star. She points to your eyes and tells you they’re beautiful. Brasileras aren’t shy about pointing that sort of thing out.Does it matter? Then you remember staring into her eyes. too many girls… too little time. the black girls with huge hoop earrings commanding the dance floor…the punk rockers. the Asian looking ones with sinister eyes. There is something fundamentally perfect about being adored. It was only yesterday you were busting through language barriers on basis of charm.boom shaking mulattas. A situation like this might normally unravel your nerves. They always do. rolled with the punches… And won her over with impersonations of “stupid Americanos” holding your imaginary map. Curious eyes are set upon you from all directions. never do Disney vacations. yesterday at lunch. 224 .

No way. And when the two of them. 225 . No. ran their fingers through your hair and kept repeating “muito lindo” you saw the potential for something truly spectacular.Social Superstar When you started to sense that the friend might be the type to be persuaded… you upped the ante…divvied up your attention…treated them equally special. guards finally down. You’re not willing to wave the white flag quite yet. Jose.

Back at the club you had come out of the bathroom to spot your girls sandwiched in the middle of a group of Norwegians. You have the waitress deliver the shots to your girls and their new Norwegian friends. Apparently strolling in at 4am with a couple of barely legal Brasileras is frowned upon at this establishment. Fortaleza’s most well known and luxurious hotel. They reluctantly do the shots… looking around to see who the mysterious stranger is that sent them. You make your Great Gatsby entrance. ordering the cleaning lady to bring a bottle of Scotch up to your room… Pronto! These sorts of things aren’t acceptable in Hotel Luzieros.The Best of TSBMAG. You get two kisses on the lips. He points at the door. One voice in your head says “Cut your losses.there is always tomorrow. Just a few hours ago you were in the mist of the single biggest girl heist of your life. a girl dangling from each arm. No one sent you the memo. You felt a little intimidated. Nights early. You signal over a cocktail waitress. Rapido! Por Favor” You would be damned to let the night go up in flames at this point. kicking over a flower pot. You slovenly escort the two girls outside. You take the blonde by the hand and immediately remove her 226 . You’re drunk and go for tongue but both girls resist. The group is confused. he is telling you. You get the gist of it though. you think. The whole matter could have easily been resolved with a small bribe. You order 8 shots of the Brazilian equivalent of Yagermeiser.” A louder voice hails down a cab and says “To the cheapest motel. Has your Super Americano Power waned? Have your girls been swept away with tales of a booming European economy… You decide to flex your muscles. The girls could not be happier to see you. But you blew any chance of that happening with your “American sense of entitlement” and incoherent attack on his character. You want to knock that smug look off his Portuguese face.COM Fortaleza ights Part 2 Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 12/02/2007 The night bellman at your hotel is talking loudly at you in a language you don’t understand. You rode in like a rock star.

Social Superstar from the group. You look back and feel bad leaving the brunette to the pack of Norwegian wolves. Rearrange some priorities. Your “gringo sense of rhythm” is usually a game killer but tonight you’re Michael fucking Jackson. Make you run back to the States. Their eyes light up. and a girl who turned out to be sixteen. Down the road. But you aren’t certain. Emelia. Smile and nod.from the opulent to the destitute. Brazil is a strange place for sure. The long winding road that is Avenida Beira Mar travels the course of the night. You casually ask the girls to see their documents. Manny’s hand is on your knee and he is talking loudly and passionately in Portuguese. a lone hooker trots on heels. Manny doesn’t blink an eye as you pass her. He could just as easily be saying “You parents will pay the ransom. You smile and nod. You reach your hand in the back and one of the girls begins 227 . The girls drag you on the dance floor. Pick up some pieces… From the back seat Emelia lets out a squeal. a couple machine guns. And if they don’t we chop you up and feed you to pigs” The girls are too busy to notice. You trust that Manny is actually taking you to a motel and not to a guerrilla hide out where you will be kidnapped and tortured. Raquel. They get closer closer closer…They Kiss. Jackpot! After an hour or two of dry humping the two Brasileras and taking turns kissing them you suggest the bounce. You signal for her to come over. Manny could probably tell you stories that would break your heart. The coast is clear for takeoff. In the back seat Raquel is disappearing inside Emelia’s dress. You take turns grinding with each girl… you look on in disbelief as the girls grind sexually with each other. You think Manny likes you. …Toward dawn you are sitting in the front seat of a cab next to Manny the driver. As your cab gets closer you see that she is topless. He is asking you questions. You flashback to an incident in Brazil two years prior involving a spotlight. the blonde is twenty. but can never be sure of these things. But you don’t want to think about these things right now. Maybe even some life decisions to make. the brunette is eighteen. Outside the street is still tinkered with people. one hand holding her skirt from riding too far up her ass. You’ll have some contemplating to do when you get home.

that is just about how you feel right now. Sandwiched in between the two warm bodies. All your doubts are alleviated when Raquel and Emelia fall onto the bed. It wasn’t until college. Growing up you always thought the other guys knew some fundamental secret about girls that you didn’t. you are reminded that this is exactly where you want to be. Even as you began a long string of conquests you always had the feeling you were just learning what came naturally to others. Looking at the girls. Emelia gently slides your pants down to your ankles. When Manny pulls away. you experience a moment of doubt. with the help of alcohol. You slide into them. You run your hands along the crest of their abdomens. leaving you and the girls in front of the motel. These guys seemed to know what they were doing. Yea… once upon a time. you can only wonder what you did in a previous life to reap these fruits in this one. Their bodies are twisting and turning into one another. Raquel is the first to signal you onto the bed.The Best of TSBMAG. They both are both kissing your neck. Maybe you can be again… Just not tonight. you were one of the good guys. 228 . And when they quickly undress.COM sucking your fingers. And even as it finally began to come naturally to you. that you began to feel comfortable around them. They are giggling in a way that reminds you that this is exactly where they want to be. you still had that underlying fear that you’ll be discovered as a fraud.

I think back to waking up with a huge hangover. I smile because there is a part of me that kind of knows it's true. you tell her you're going to take a piss. But I should have figured she would call me. that way if it's a bomb. and she was no prize then. and she comes back two minutes later in a different outfit. So I had no intention of calling her. I hear my buddy Phil saying. She must have caught it. and I realize that the day didn't exactly start out with promise. She's been at happy hour. I'm going to do everything in my power to convince myself I wasn’t intending to. Great. She answers the door dressed in a tight white shirt. So why should it end with promise. As I'm checking my email. what about tonight.” I park my car outside of her apartment. She's 25lbs away from pulling it off. As much as I hated this girl when I was dating her. I ran into her about a week ago for the first time in years and gave her my number out of courtesy when she gave me hers. Jillian. I sit in it for a second.) I say. she is old pussy. I took her virginity for god sake. 229 . “Always take two cars. She wants me to meet her at her apartment. I refuse to waste a Friday or Saturday on her. She always was an annoying drunk. There goes the quick getaway. she’s drunk. Jake seems to think I'm going to fuck her. Plus she’ll expect less time from me on a week night. and you take off. she calls. An outfit I don't usually mind on girls who can pull it off. She’s ten years older than she was when I dated her. a girl I dated for a little over a year. And everyone loves old pussy. about a year before Beth (love of my life till she broke my heart in a million pieces) came around. a skirt. And she took mine (although I don't let too many people know that. I get home and search my drawers for my least appealing outfit. and totally inappropriate black hooker boots. This means we will be taking one car. wants to know if I want to meet up for drinks one night this weekend. I sneer.Social Superstar 10 Years After I Took Her Virginity Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/27/2007 I get the random phone call. If I'm going to fuck this girl. I call Jake on the way home. because she tells me she’ll be right back.

At that precise minute she puts the dog into her purse and tells me she is taking it with us for drinks. Apparently her rambling has put it to sleep. Unfortunately I don’t have that option. All egging this stupid cop story on. So I do the next best thing and guzzle gin and tonics. Finally I say. and a guy playing pool over hears her. I take this as my cue to excuse myself for a much needed piss break. I was behind her in line and she told him to verify her name with me. “Lauren. Nothing I care about anyway. well. I recognized one of the girls. “Just pick a place and leave the fucking dog in the car. Talking loudly and compulsively about nothing.The Best of TSBMAG. She tells me the puppy is too scared to stay home alone.” I say to get her attention. “This is New Jersey there are no outside cafes. because she's’ crazy. Amazingly the dog is being good. which was good. because I don't know many people that go there. “This is going to be a long night. does in fact. We get to the pub and this bitch won’t leave the thing in the car. When the guy asked me. have no outdoor places. Plus one her friends had made eye contact with me while I was grabbing a drink at the bar on the way back from the bathroom. This idiot puts this little puppy in her purse. She was an old college friend of a friend type girl. I tell her. I just for the life of me couldn’t remember her name.” She picks the Town Pub. He’s a cop and is interested in her story. I keep nodding my head. I wish I could tape record this car ride to play to people to demonstrate the torture I was going through listening to this bitch. I smile because. Instead of joining the fun I walked over to the pool table where three girls were about to start playing.” I think. and I have to pet it while she tells me how cute it is. And so she was kicked out of the club. Luckily her name came back to me right then. There is this little dog that keeps jumping on my leg. I get out of the bathroom and this bitch has a crowd of derelicts surrounding her.” She insists and I don't feel like arguing. Over the summer she was getting harassed by a bouncer who was claiming her ID was a fake. I have now been in the car with her for twenty minutes. She is in the middle of some story about how she got pulled over for no good reason.COM It is awkward in her apartment. I felt this was a perfect time to apologize for my blunder. I tell her. isn't it?” She says we’ll go to a place outside. “that is a problem. 230 . She soon realizes that New Jersey.

She is screaming that the girls stole her dog. Her face is covered in blood. We exchange numbers. And apparently is scared of pubs. I tell them they should probably give it back. Jill has made her way back to the booth near the pool table. Jill comes over to me and explains how Lauren just hates her for fucking her ex boyfriend. I explain what a dog was doing in her purse. The cute one who was eying me. She glances at the bag and realizes that there is no dog in there. I just wanted to talk to Ivana some more. We chat for a few. She is crying hysterically. When we walk back to pool table there is tension between Jill and Lauren. I need another drink. I tell Jill to go to the bathroom and cool down for a minute. The girls all laugh. ‘I didn't see nothing look’.Social Superstar She’s a friendly girl and within minutes I'm the fourth player on a two on two pool game. I promise to call. She realizes that the girls are gone now too. the puppy wakes up. I walk her away from the crowd. She has an accent. I walk back over to Ivana and see if there is any chance of getting her back to my house later. Only she is crazy. she is preoccupied with the derelicts anyway. The three girls are in it with the puppy. Everyone in the place is staring at her like she's crazy. I explain my ordeal. We are hitting it off nicely. She looks under the table. I twirl my finger by my ear to signify she’s crazy. but I'm feeling sporty. Meanwhile Jill has lost it completely. They decide that Jill is unfit to raise this dog. Jill stops in the middle of a sentence to point out that Lauren has been giving her dirty looks. Just then Jill comes barreling out the front door. She panics. She is absolutely 231 . It starts freaking out. They feel my pain. I give a. Ivana and I say a nice goodbye. and decide to take it. As Jill is talking to the girls. She's from Denmark or France or something. Something I never do. I'm standing by Lauren’s SUV. I figure Jill won’t mind. We are all kind of making fun of my obnoxious friend and her and her obnoxious stories. I paired with Ivana. I feel queasy. And a bunch of other shit I could care less about. When she leaves. One of the girls grabs the dog and heads for the door. and proceed to defend myself for ever having dated this idiot. I tell her. I call Ivana over to me. She starts scurrying around. The two remaining girls decide it's a good time to flee. All the girls hover around the dog. I will go outside to see if the girls have it. I offer to buy the girls a round. I should have never left because when I come back Jill is by the pool table telling the girls how we were each other's firsts.

" She says it's really fucked up for me to just leave her like this. I push her off and start to walk away. They are both punching each other violently. I'm awakened from my dream the next morning with a phone call from Jill.” he says. He then searches the truck for the dog. I ask the bouncer if he's going to break it up. I tell her I have work early. I can.COM hysterical. I give her another little hug. Finally the bouncer runs over and breaks it up. give her a little hug. but I have to go. Later in the night we make love in the outdoor hot tub with a couple watching. I teach her how to ski and she picks it up quickly and soon she is beating me down the mountain. And so begins another fine morning. She gets blood on me. Her all bundled up.The Best of TSBMAG. before the fight. “Not till a titty pops out. and tell her. He wants to know if they really have her dog. I suggest we leave. Maybe she ran into a wall in all the confusion. I shrug. Looking so cute as she keeps falling into the snow. feeling a little guilty for letting it happen. She says she can't believe I'm leaving. 232 . A bouncer calls me over and asks me what happened. That night I dream of Beth and being up in Killington with her. I agree. Jill is crying and bleeding and hugging the dog. I really can be a dick. She doesn't remember. She runs over to the SUV and starts screaming at the girls. When our half hour was up we just keep making love until someone from the front desk has to come in and tell us to leave. We look over at the car where Jill has pulled Lauren out. waiting for us to use up the half hour we were allowed to be in there. Her lip is still bleeding pretty badly. "it's been a fun night. heartless dick I am. I got to get as far away from this psychopath as possible. She's in the emergency room and just wants to tell me what a complete and utter selfish. She was bleeding when she came out of the pub. My head hits the pillow and I wonder if this is really what my life has come to. I kind of pat her on the back. I ask her how it happened. We are outside Jill’s apartment and I'm trying to calm her down. He takes it from the truck and hands it to Jill.

“We are wasting this house.” I tell them. But he's got a nice house. my roommates and I have over glorified this house. It would have been sweet. Probably because we lived in such shit throughout college. we go to New York. Yep. So we were naturally perplexed when a couple weeks had gone by and none of us were yet to christen our new place with a new girl. girls would just naturally come. “Maybe the house isn't as impressive as we think. naked chicken fighting. “I'm telling you. we all basically start blowing off the girls we were dating. Still have visions of girls sitting on our shoulders. An outdoor one.” Jale again.” I'm blunt but.” The first month we have the house.” Brian says. “I'm telling you. Young new pussy is what this house is all about. so I'll fuck him anyway. “Bobby's old and kind of sleazy. Without women. Like they're going.” Jake proclaims “Shut up with that. and his teeth are really yellow. getting ready for the onslaught of young new pussy that was awaiting us. 233 . “Did she see the house?” or “What did she say when she walked in?” Like because we had a house (only slightly nicer than a frat house mind you) girls were going to just fuck us. “What the fuck is it?” Brian is asking us after a third Friday in a row sitting on floor in the living room drunk watching Napoleon Dynamite at 3 in the morning. Sort of like Field of Dreams. guarantee we'd be more appreciated there. and shit like that.Social Superstar My First Piece of MySpace Pussy Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/20/2007 We've always had delusions of grandeur in regards to the house we our renting. it's the bars we go to. A common line. I'm in no mood for excuses. We should have it packed right now with girls flipping coins seeing who gets to fuck us next. We were still without couches for our living room and we were hot tub shopping. We also always imagined that because we had the house now.

now clearly enjoying the opportunity to rip. On one hand she is an old standby.” Jake with hands over ears. I try to defend myself. do your magic.The Best of TSBMAG. Don't crush my dreams daddy.” Brian threatens me with what he knows it my worst fear.I am just fucking horny and have to be realistic. Tell everyone about your 2 week long drought. “I don't know man. stop. No. I announce my dilemma to my roommates as we were all preparing for work. I got pretty excited imagining what she was going to look like. “I don't see condom wrappers in either of your trash cans. Without paying. Without calling one of my old stand bys.” Me still optimistic. 234 . My first thought was to call Tammy and break the rule a little bit. “Bobby Rio having trouble getting laid?” They laugh. Having a reputation to live up to can be a pain in the fucking ass sometimes. Are we the neighborhood homos. “You might be on to something I finally admit.” “I'm going to out you on the internet.COM “Don't do it. “Give it time. But on the other hand. You know what grown men share a house at thirty? Crack heads.” “You're crushing it. “Get on the phone. boys?” That Monday I woke up in the morning. Crack heads and gay men. the pleasure of not knowing what the next girl you'll fuck looks like. and I swore Id fuck something new tonight. Recollect on the weekend.” Jake says.” Jake says. In this house. The one thing that keeps me single. Of course there was the slight crick in the plan being that it's a completely dead Monday bar night and we don't have any leads to work with from the weekend. Apparently they see the irony. We're almost thirty. it would be a completely new chick. I lie in bed. Take a quick piss and decided I was getting laid tonight.

but it is the first Monday of the month.Social Superstar “I could be fucking Tammy any day this week plenty of other girls too.” “Work you're magic. But tomorrow morning. and it is full of people cashing in their food stamps.” I am saying this wondering how the hell I am going to deal with them tomorrow morning when we all wake up alone. “Yea. I could bring Keira Knightly home and fuck her on the kitchen table and they still wouldn't be impressed. What time is it again. I await the abuse. I head to Barnes and Noble. These two dicks. I had put a profile up a month or two ago. browsing profiles on MySpace. you'll both be thanking Bobby. I am sitting on my computer. if she could stay out past her curfew. but I have a vague recollection of a past conversation that didn't go so well. And I'm getting you two pricks laid too. Bobby. Although I was fairly confident I could have taken home this Mexican women that kept giving me the eye.” Jake inputs. I call out of work. “I think I saw her hanging out in front of 7-11 the other night.” I say this. maybe casually mention how much I love Lost or whatever other stupid show she has 235 . There is a cute girl behind the counter serving coffee. I looked at it like I was acquiring ammunition in case I ever ran into one of these girls in a bar. Not much talent here this morning though. I headed home to regroup. I'm getting laid tonight. but still kind of considered it creepy to be contacting girls online. I also quickly found that my off beat sense of humor didn't translate well in emails. I still managed to waste hours browsing profiles. on school nights?” Brian says. I hang out in Shop Right for a bit. I try to think where I can go on a Monday morning to meet some women. As the details of conversation become less blurry I decide I better get the hell out of there before she recognizes me. “That's it. she had two bratty kids that would have posed a problem in closing the deal quickly. and know it is a weak comeback. I figured I just start humming one of her favorite songs. I always hear stories of successful book store pickups. “You joke now.

But as I'm looking at her picture my dick is getting hard so it's settled. She is only eighteen. I wrote her back. I read the email. I'm sure you're reading this and wondering. Blonde. I very rarely got messages on MySpace. Now. I am sad to report. I have posted the email in its entirety. 236 . how can I be one of those lucky ladies? Well it's your special day. and I'd be golden. No clear body shots. spontaneous. I go back to her profile page. Picture Tara Reid twenty five pounds heavier. Adorable face. if I'd have to do a newspaper singles ad it word read something like this. might explain it. My spare time consists of trying to find ways to sneak strange women out of my room before they realize that I don't know their name. And write me a brief essay on why you deserve to be Bobby's Miss Wednesday Night. and decide that she is. My about me and who I'd like to meet.COM listed under TV. what if she is smart enough to be displaying sarcasm. I click on her profile page to check her out more. Or how I met them. I read her interests. Single white. I am the man. I start believing the hype. I am the mother fucking man. "Pick me!" And so we have a winner. open minded women. View more pictures. She'll do. but in that sloppy goodness sort of way. So I am a bit surprised when I see that it's a girl called "Everything I thought you know" that has messaged me. about me. Who I'd like to meet: Adventurous. hung like a -use your imagination. I mean it would be fate. male. that smart. I think as my home screen reads new messages. shed have to fuck me right? Fate. not in fact. A tad larger than I would prefer. An exposed left arm kind of scares me. A lovely word. Or better yet.The Best of TSBMAG. and heroes. I am currently taking applications for Wednesday nights. So send at least four pictures. I have posted it in its entirety. I enlarge them and get set to analyze. Perfect.women. Only three. Then the thought hits me. Brazilian or Asian. Slightly chubby. contact me and I'll show you. a plus! I did not receive many applications. For a moment I feel special. About me: Well. Two of the pictures have to be body shots.

I will not post it in its entirety. a deck of cards. The beauty of eighteen year olds is that they are extremely easy to impress. I hesitantly agree. I just never had a need to bother with it. They are both very happy. Instead I will break it down into subjects. I'd say half the time he fucks them the first night. if you're thinking that sounded too easy. We will need: Beer. laughing inside at the thought of which of roommates would wind up with the fat one. If I hear from you we'll take it further. and in an effort to save space.Social Superstar I will be at my computer for the next three hours. If you would seriously like to be considered for the role. and she will have to bring someone else. Exactly three hours later she contacts me. A bit of information I skipped over in the subject matter. Me telling her that one of her friends was too fat for my roommates. I have a friend Michael that cleans up online. I leave out the small detail above. what she's doing tonight Her looking at my roommates MySpace profiles Her telling me how hot they are Us making plans for tonight Now. We plan the night. food (so that fat one doesn't drag them out to McDonalds before things get going) condoms. everything will be explained later. Now I've heard of online success stories. and that's about it. He pulls 3 or 4 girls a week off MySpace and Match. I'm actually trying to get him to write a book on the subject. Until now. 237 . When my roommates get home I tell them the news. So I know it is possible. music. Boring small talk More boring small talk How hot I am What kind of piercing she has What kind of tattoos she has What she's doing tonight Does she have 2 friends Are they hot Me looking at friends MySpace profiles Again. It was an extremely long conversation. IM me at Bobbyrio03 on AOL. She tells me that these two girls are the only ones that would be willing to come tonight.

They are fat. I assume the role of gracious host. We continually check the blinds to make sure no one can see in. ha ha ha ha. No one will ever know until I tell the world about it boys. And the drinking begins. And so it's on. There is an instant decision to be made. We will fuck them anyway. That's what you fucks get for not respecting my authority. Only my girl will not release it.The Best of TSBMAG. We pretend to be interested. Never have I ever Begin sexual talk 238 . We seem like great guys. Below is straight out of Bobby Rios playbook for banging girls under twenty. No one will ever know about this. I am breaking a pact that we made that night. The speed at which we are putting beers down at 8:45 on a Monday is frightening. It will not be pretty later. Take notes! Casual drinking Speed up the drinking with flip cup Pair off and speed up drinking even more with beer pong When sufficiently drunk suggest the game. I decide the jacket should stay on until I put a few beers down. The three of us are communicating solely with eye glances. They stampede in. While my horse is no prize. It must be done exactly in this order. The message has been sent. My roommates look at me in shock. the lights are dimmed. gothic horse is downright repulsive. We are all sitting at the dining room table.COM 8:30 PM The piggies arrive. we swear to each other while the horses take a piss together. We do the introductions. She tells me it's cold. thinking about which one of my roommates will fuck her tonight. There is Katie (horse). I take their jackets. The horses love us immediately. By 9:30 we've become restless. There is nothing gratifying about winning the affection of a horse. And Kristen (shit smeller). I once again laugh. Around 10PM we decide it is time to take this to the next level. The doors are locked. We learn a whole bunch of irrelevant information about these girls. one bigger than the next. There is Aimee (gothic horse). I shrug. The horses are keeping up. I know what that jacket hides. I cringe. We turn our cell phones off. We are all thoroughly disappointed.

Then I blow my load all over her big fat titties. it works on real girls too.Social Superstar Top the night off with Truth or Dare Get Laid Yes.” I tell her. I brush the hair out of her eyes. She looks perplexed. I don't admit this. I mean if you're going to do it you may as well enjoy it. I let this fat pig ride me. I am a little jealous. yea. I hope you never have to do what I am about to do. she has cuteness to her. Instead I continually point out to him how her nostrils are snared. it is much easier to do the smooth transition with girls over a buck fifty. I am alone in the kitchen with horse now. In the morning we hurry the horses out. I throw a pair of boxers at her to clean up with. We kiss. Her hand makes its way down my pants.” she whispers. the skinniest of the crew. But trust me. we rationalize. It is all just practice for the big game. He wins the argument. “Show me your room.” she tells me. We pair off. I eat her pussy. 239 . I do her doggy. “You have an amazing smile. Oh. or that many beers. lick my dick like it's an ice cream cone. The kiss is oddly passionate. I tell her how sexy she is. Kids. He seems happy. I shrug and mumble something about drinking too much. We wonder if she is going to swallow him. We sit and brag about the poundings we gave them. In this light. Jake is with shit smeller. There is no thrill of victory with fat girls. And so the house finally got us laid. We both win the battle as we watch Brian make out of with Gothic Horse. He continually reminds me that my horse hasn't seen her hooves since the third grade. “You have amazing eyes. I fuck the shit out of her. And I had my first of many MySpace escapades. and I roll over and go to sleep.

I throw a pair of jeans on and head to The Saloon for a beer. The truth is when you get good at this shit you start writing your own rules. vitamins. She knew it was me. He is finally back from Vegas. I wonder how she is going to be in bed later. 12:30 pm I am not the only one in the bar. Don't call so soon. An indicator that she already put my number in her phone. I hang up the phone and smile. But you only got her number last night Bobby. He tells me he thinks one of the hookers out there gave him the clap. but if you wait six days to call a girl after you get her number chances are she forgot you.The Best of TSBMAG. I am afraid that these old men have subliminally installed that in my brain. 1:15 pm I call Phil. I call Gloria. 12:51 pm Gloria answers. I tell him he should give it to 240 . It is a great movie. He is almost 70. Yes. I quickly scratch that idea. Apparently there are other people who use Memorial Day weekend as a way to justify drinking in the afternoon. Now he wants to tell stories. never show even the slightest sign of interest with old people. We chat for a few minutes. I contemplate putting in a few hours at the office. These people have watched Swingers too many times. I make a friend with a guy next to me. He is approximately the 600th old man in a bar who tells me not to get married. 12:50 pm I decide that I do not want to spend my Memorial Day weekend with the kind of people who drink alone at the town pub. buddy. Here is some advice.COM Return of a Pick-Up Artist (Part 2) Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/09/2008 11:45 am The day began with a Powerbar. water and a cool shower. They will take it as an opportunity to spend the next two hours spilling their guts about a life gone by. I can hear the people out there saying.

Maybe even thirty. Tell her you brought her a gift back. But she is actually even hotter than I imagined. I started seeing this conversation going in a very good direction. Soon she is describing the first time she gave a guy road head.Social Superstar Penelope. 3:00 pm I have been in the car with her for thirty minutes and I have to say it's been a pretty pleasant experience. Younger girls tend to be more naive when it comes to talking about this kind of 241 . Then I steer it back to neutral topics: work. if I blew my load this early the rest of the day would be a waste. Every time I bring it back to R. It's sexy though. She had a little bit of the hippy chick thing going on and I thought this would be a good way to get her juices flowing. I had put quite a few down at Bob's party and was a little scared I might get a surprise when she answered the door. I did not fret. 3:35 pm I have been doing a good job juggling the conversation between PG and R. dinner. the first guy she kissed. No. Gloria is taking the ride with me up to Warren to help me assess Phil's uncle's land. For your first date with a girl don’t go the standard coffee. when we lost our virginity. you’ll have to be a little more creative. drinks route. maybe even fuck her in the woods. Every time I guide the conversation to edgier topics she bites right away. 2:30 pm I pick up Gloria. I get directions for some land up in Warren County that he wants me to do an appraisal on. Here is another hint. There is a slight hint of age twinkling in her eyes. Each time I test her she bites and brings the conversation even racier. I test her out and see if I can elevate it even further. if you want to fuck her the first night. pop culture gossip and just when the conversation hits a lull I throw out things like: coworkers who fuck. family. what celebrities we'd like to screw and just when I sense the conversation has gotten too racy I bring it back to PG. She has been on that date a hundred times with a hundred guys. unless she's a complete slut. Just kind of has that natural no make-up kind of beauty. She's got long wavy brown hair. Here is a hint. The older the girls the more willing she is too elevate the conversation. Who knows. Unfortunately we were about a minute from the land. friends. She's got to be in her late twenties.

The look in Gloria's eyes when we see the sheep let me know that the juices are officially flowing. She sees through my bullshit and calls me out again. There is a tiny lake. I don't mean be a meathead. but we got in that house/barn. 4:15 pm A pack of wild sheep stroll in from the field in the back of the property. There are only a handful of trees scattered around.COM stuff. There will be a time for that later. The older ones eat this shit up. I grabbed her hand and we walked around for awhile. 4:00 pm Phil's uncle's land is pretty barren. This early in the day I was not going to take that chance. I put my clip board down. She suggests that we check out the inside of the barn/house. Caveman type shit. So instead of giving up when I saw the bars over the door. I walk around taking pictures. I contemplated going for a naturalgirls. As cool as she seems. There is a small abandoned barn looking house. All the signs of an adventurous afternoon were there. I told her to pose. but she said it with the slightest hint of sarcasm. That way all these boring pictures of barren land will have something interesting to look at. “Oh look how cute and professional you look. All day hands were always brushing against each other.” Which was actually the look I was going for. 242 . Boards are over a door. I start snapping some pictures of them. I jot things down. The Kino has begun. Hands were getting left places longer. I had her posing all over the place in all kinds of positions.The Best of TSBMAG. Here is a hint. They are just as horny as you are. Like I'm a real professional under my bad boy exterior. Rising higher lower. I wonder if there is an abandoned bed in there. although this is only to make this trip seem a little more important. I pulled out the camera. Use random opportunities like this to display some alpha male characteristics. Fully clothed unfortunately. Some girls just get so damn turned on by nature. actually. Displaying raw power. I made it a point to bust the fucking door in. but ultimately decided against it. I was not shy about touching her but now the touching was turning flirty.com photo shoot. There was a bed but it was decrepit looking and I'd have preferred the floor. suggesting something like that could freak a girl out if the rapport isn’t as strong as you imagined. and have very little tolerance for banal talk. you just have to do those certain things women like to see men do. It took a few times and knocked quite a bit of wind out of me.

She left because if the birds hadn’t of come she was about to do something I probably wouldn’t respect her for tomorrow. She says sort of. Don't respond with anything. but she just has this confidence about her. A lot of times girls are just saying this shit to make themselves feel better about what they are about to do. If the rapport is good enough you can enjoy the silence together. She gives thumbs down. I am genuinely enjoying 243 . She quickly pulled me out of the room and out of the barn. My racing heart and freaked out gestures definitely subtracted from some of that alpha male I had displayed earlier. I have a fucking fear of birds. Once you are at this stage use any excuse you can to get her touching you. 4:45 pm We are in the car on our way home. Ignore it. but don't make the mistake of joining in the conversation because it won't lead anywhere good. The silence is not uncomfortable. I ask her if she left because of the birds. What can I tell you? Luckily she was even more freaked. We finally pushed the door open basically falling into it. She's right. Oh well. She grabbed a hold of me. when a girl throws out a comment like. just kidding. I ask her if she doesn’t like my hair.Social Superstar I saw a room in the back that I decided would be the room. I probably wouldn’t have. that I found myself a little flattered by the adulation. Give her time to think about how cool you are and a whole bunch of other reasons to justify fucking you later. There is less talking then on the way up. She kept getting closer and closer to me until I could feel the warmth from under her jeans. I kept nudging her toward the room chatting her up about the crazy ax man behind the door. She has gone googly eyed on me. Another hint. Let them rid themselves of the guilt. she's not going to sleep with you tonight because she likes you or because you won't respect her in the morning. such a sexy at ease way. Don't always feel the need to keep the conversation going. I don’t say anything though. It was definitely a buzz kill. I got behind her and guided her toward the door. She runs her hand through my hair. Then she laughs and says. She is looking at me hard. I joked with her saying that someone was behind the door waiting for us. 5:30 pm We grab a quick bite to eat at a small Italian cafe near her house. as planned. To our surprise though three hawklike birds came flying at our heads. But she would like to cut my hair. Normally this look scares me. She tells me I should let her cut my hair. Our hands are in the middle of the table intertwined.

6:15 pm I am sitting in a chair at her salon. I tell her I have a foot fetish. I wonder if I should try to hide this fact or leave it out in the open and see if she catches it. She leans my head back into the sink and I wince when my neck touches the cold stone of the sink. Finally her fingers start running through my hair. I can't tell if she realized I was kidding.COM her company. No joke. I look up and she is soaping up her hands. but it did make me pitch a tent with my smock as I got up to walk over the other chair for the haircut.The Best of TSBMAG. and is basically manager of the place. and don't adjust. when I was a little kid I used to get so turned on when the shampoo girls breast would brush against me during the wash that I couldn’t resist the idea of sitting in a chair watching her in the mirror. She keeps touching the water and asking me if it's warm enough. This is not as sexual as I imagined it would be. I came from that scalp massage. I am aroused. I want to open my eyes and look up at her. She leaned into me and a titty brushed against me. I wonder if it will make things awkward if I hate my hair cut. I have towel choked around my neck and a restricting smock on. so no one will mind. I ask her if she gets turned on by the toe polish scene in Bull Durham. 5:50 pm We are in the car on the way to her salon for a haircut. She asks me if I want a pedicure at the salon. 6:17 pm The hair cut has begun. Now Gloria's massage was not going to make me cum. I watch hair falling off my head. I appreciate the enthusiasm in which she is doing 244 . Yes. Bobby is all around pleased with this one and gives her the Bobby Rio seal of approval. This rates up there with a scalp massage I got from a pro in a termas in Rio a few years back. The place is closed but she has a key. I mean how am I supposed to act if she really fucks it up? My attention is quickly diverted from my haircut to the mirror where I watch as all of her attention is focused on my head. Just thought I'd throw that in there so that you don’t think the only thing on my mind is sex. She runs water over my head. But the bait worked and she telling me about a scene in another movie that turned her on. While I'm perfectly happy with my present haircut. I decide fuck it. She is sexually massaging my scalp. In the car ride I bring the conversation back into R territory.

Just enough muff to keep with the natural girl image. I help her with her pants. My mouth goes back in forth from her mouth to her neck. So I eat. but trimmed up enough to still look edible. I sense that she has come from the oral. We are making out hard. I do the lean back please me lean and await my reward. Make her feel like the luckiest girl in the world to hear it. As soon as I say this she drops the scissors. 6:19 pm You are so fucking sexy. And then the whole thing. She goes down on me and I am enjoying it way too much. One good compliment can melt away any defense she might have still had up. The unbuckling begins. At this point I am about to indulge myself in the details. and then I pull her towards me. She's got the trademark hippie girl patch. She says we can't do it here. I smell her neck for a second and then turn her face toward me and start kissing her. I pull her head up and tell her again how fucking sexy she is. I spin myself around on the chair so that I'm facing her midsection. Just when I think I'm going to have to overcome another obstacle. I tease with crotch rubs. We stare at each other for a second. people can see in. If you are uncomfortable reading about my sexual exploits you probably shouldn’t continue. She can't pause for a minute. My mouth goes down to her belly button area. I am extremely turned on. I lay her down on the chair. In the back room there is a recliner chair where they do waxing and stuff. No panties!!!! God I love hippie girls. She goes crazy. I watch her wiggle out of them. She pulls me into her. Another hint: That was only the second time I complimented her all 245 . She is extremely turned on.Social Superstar her job. Which makes me wonder if I should tip her when she's done? I decide she will get a tip. she suggests we go into the back room. I have no fucking clue what time it is pm I stand up and push Gloria down into the chair. When you say something like that to a girl. I tell her and really mean it. I get on top of her and am kind of grinding into her. My hands are running up and down her legs. say it with all the confidence you can muster up. She turns me over and is practically ripping my jeans off of me. as they are fond memories.

cuddle like you're really into (it helps when you are) and be fucking silent. 8:30 pm I drop Gloria off. As much as I am into Gloria she's a little old for daddy and probably won't make the cut. Trust me words are not necessary. There is a glorious finale with an extremely satisfying cum.COM night. Lay there. But we'll see… 246 . I wiggle my boxer briefs from around my ankles stand up and push her down on the chair. I was really enjoying the time with her. Hint: Guys even if she's the fuck off the century don't get all gushy telling her how good it was or how much you like her. I know some guys would have asked her to spend the night. If in a week you decide you're not into them it is easier to start blowing them off. This is truly some of the best sex I've had in awhile. I am inside of her now. Use compliments sparingly so that when you finally give them they will be regarded higher. We are both breathless. put your arm around.The Best of TSBMAG. I easily could have spent the rest of the night with her. But you really have to wait to see where you want to go with this before you start getting so close.

hungry. The mixer was with a subpar sorority and the talent pool was slim..” A few minutes later I noticed a chick that was cute (in relation to the other pigs at the party) and I went over and started conversing with her.Social Superstar Snowballed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/21/2008 I was in the worst drought of my life at the time. I waited for her about ten minutes. I mean licking my chops. and whispered to each other that “if all else fails we take her upstairs and tag team her. Although I tried to stay away from frat houses as I was trying to “make it in the real world” the offer was just too tempting. What was left of my confidence was officially shattered. 247 . We jokingly sandwiched her and danced a little. At one point we were standing together sipping keg beer from our red cups when this sloppy fat chick starts trying to dance with us. I was fresh out of college. Unfortunately my game was pretty bad at this point and I just kept talking about nonsense and wound up boring her to death. I found her upstairs making out with one of the younger frat brothers. and had just been dumped by the girl I thought I was going to marry. The thought of hot young drunk college girls was enough to persuade me and my friend Jake to blow off work the next day and head out on a Tuesday night to relive some former glory. She excused herself to go to the bathroom. I did the walk of shame back downstairs. My skills and confidence were at an all time low. At this point there wasn’t anybody downstairs so I just plopped on the couch and waited for Jake so we could leave. The party was less than spectacular. But worst of all… I just fucking need to blow a load!!! Some of my old college buddies were having a little get together at their house and invited me. Still in a bit of a depression I proceeded to drink myself silly. I stalked her out like the hungry wolf that I was. In my drunken state I assumed we hit it off pretty well.. As the night started to wind down I got hungry. Jake was in no better shape than me. willing to fuck anything. When she didn’t return.

And a minute later I was lying on a dirty couch making out with her. I immediately got her on the couch. I am not going to lie and say she had any redeeming qualities. I may as well finish the deal. or the realization that I just made out with a piglet three minutes after she swallowed my buddies cum…. 248 . “If you’re still down we can do her porn style” “Dude. I don’t know if it was the 12 red cups of Bud Ice. These girls happened to be from my ex girlfriends sorority. She gave me a killer blowjob. I looked at this as a gift from god.COM A couple minutes later the fat girl from earlier walks in the front door. She had breath that made me want to puke. Stroked her hair.The Best of TSBMAG. I just put my head down in shame. They were kind enough to head upstairs without making conversation with me. “Yo. I was just with her behind the shed outside. and finally went outside and pulled the trigger… blowing junks all over the front porch. As I was walking outside Jake was walking back in the house. She didn’t. I told the piglet I would be right back and headed out to my car to grab a condom. swallowed and everything” Jake tells me. I’ve got the fat girl inside half naked and ready to fuck” I tell him. They looked at me in shock when they saw me lying on the couch with the piglet. the fact I got caught on the couch with a fatty by my ex girlfriend’s whole sorority. But I kept kissing her and slowly slipping my hand down her pants. Told her she was sexy. 6 years later Jake is still asking me how his babies taste. But I started dry heaving uncontrollably. I figured all my dignity was gone. Once they left. As luck would have it… the door opens again and a handful of girls walk into the house.

It was a little surprising because our friend Chris had basically been “born again” after dating a very Christian girl for the last couple years. Tammy was a hostess at a restaurant where I was bar tending at the time. Mike and I were sharing a room on the same floor as the groom’s family. Nevertheless.. The previous attempt at fucking Tammy’s ridiculously tight pussy left me with no alternative than to secure an insurance policy for the next time. but I was too 249 . A handful of us met at the hotel lobby bar. Against my better judgment I scanned my phone for some tail to call. The rehearsal after party ended pretty early which left a lot of time to kill at the hotel we were all staying at. Not fall down humiliate yourself drunk. and we're not talking about the sweet innocent type. The insurance policy came in the form of a pill of Viagra I scored off a friend for “extra measure.” This only made her want me more.Social Superstar Hotel Room High Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/27/2008 Somehow me and Mike Stoute were asked to be groomsmen in a college buddy of ours wedding.. Tammy was an eighteen year old senior in high school…. She was dressed high school whorish as usual… and got quite a few stares from the families of the bride and groom. Chris gave me a look. I actually came before I got inside her… I caught my load in my hand and then pushed her off me and told her it was “too soon. and my performance was less than stellar. as Chris wanted us in close proximity to prevent any debauchery that would have had us over sleep the morning nuptials. where I slowly got drunk enough to realize I was wasting a perfectly good hotel room. I stopped at Tammy. Mike and I were sitting in the lobby when Tammy arrived.” The restaurant was a close knit group and I had a reputation to uphold… I figured I could get Stoute out of the room for a good hour while I gave Tammy the pounding she craved. we wound up in his wedding party… The night before the wedding we all got pretty drunk after the rehearsals. just drunk enough to make some bad decisions. Since Mike and I didn’t exactly conform to the couple’s moral standards. we didn’t see much of Chris anymore. I had fucked her once before.

Finally I slightly opened the door and peaked out. sniff around. I peeked through the little hole and saw a man in a suit standing next to a bald security guard. Tammy was just as big a fan.The Best of TSBMAG. and shows them his left. Then switches the bag and shows them his other hand. Tammy. Mike. the three of us decided to go up to the room. The men are not amused. The hotel manager opens the door. The bald guy pushed the door open. Mike starts pleading with them to not call the cops. and I just shrug our shoulders. Mike makes a running dive toward the toilet. there is another knock on the door. I let them knock another minute. They tell us that if he hadn’t been a wise ass. The next thing I know Mike is barreling past them headed towards the bathroom. and the two of them entered the room. The manager explains the situation and tells him to leave. Chris. The room is a cloud of smoke and the hotel manager starts harassing us about the smell. He is reprimanding us sternly. and pretend we don’t smell anything. The hotel manager calls down to the front desk and tells them to secure a police officer. The bald guy takes the bag and demands for all three of to sit on the bed. but the bald security guard catches him. they would have let us go. while the three of just stared at each other in disbelief. Mike puts the bag in his right hand. but the bald guy tackles him just as Mike reaches his hand out to flush the bag. After getting the evil eye from just about everyone in the lobby. But now the bald guy is pissed. Just as the two of them were finishing their second “cigar” there was a pounding knock on the door. If you’ve listened to Mike’s incessant coughing during our podcasts you could probably tell that he is quite fond of the green stuff. so Mike could roll a “cigar” that he and Tammy could smoke. so when the two of them got together the entire room was a giant cloud. Just as he gets finished telling us how big scumbags we are. The bald guy darts after him. He is a corrections officer. They demand to see what's in Mike’s hand. It is our friend Chris.COM drunk to give a shit at that point. 250 . He casually tries to grab it without them seeing. I just sat there waiting for Mike to leave so that I could get my grubby hands on Tammy. Mike spots a dime bag on night table. They both looked at me to answer it as I was apparently the most sober. The three of us just froze. They demand to see both hands. Then as the manager starts looking around the room.

Mike and I hand him are licenses. He asks “Whose duffel bag is this?” I raise my hand. The manager tells us he’s not going to ruin our friend’s wedding just because we’ve decided to be fuck ups. We pass various members of Chris’s family on our long walk to the elevator. The bald guy wants to know why a 26 year old guy is carrying around a pill of Viagra. The hotel manager tells them the whole story with all the gory details. The manager tells Chris to leave for a minute.” Even the bald guy is little 251 .” His solution is to call Tammy’s parents and have them come to the hotel to pick her up. He then tells the bald guy to search the room to make sure we don’t have anything else in the room. The bald guy has to hold Tammy’s dad back from striking me. as Tammy and I get escorted through the halls by the manager and the security guard. shuts the door and comes back inside. Tammy’s mom is grabbing her ear and calling her a “little tramp. He holds the little blue pill in the air and wants to know who has a prescription for an erectile dysfunction medication. I have no answer for either one of them.Social Superstar seeing visions of two missing groomsmen and in no mood to explain what jerk offs his friends are to his fiancé. The only identification Tammy has on her is her high school ID. We finally get down stairs where the four of us sit in the lobby waiting for Tammy’s parents to arrive. Twenty five minutes later Tammy’s mom and dad show up. begs the hotel manager to not call the cops. The hotel manager looks at me like I’m the scum of the earth. “And I want you to be there with me when they arrive” he says to me. I apologize and promise that I will never ever see Tammy again. He tells us “You’re friend may have just saved your ass. The hotel manager wants to know why a 26 year old has a high school girl in a hotel room that is filled with booze and other goodies. he’s going to leave the police out of this. But he then says “I can’t leave this girl in the room with you two in good conscious. None of us say anything. Lucky Mike gets to stay in the room.” But he wants our names and some identification. At that precise moment the bald guy pulls my pill of Viagra out of a pill case in my duffel bag.

I sleep soundly that night. a hot cousin from Texas. It will not be pretty walking into work on Monday. 252 . My cell phone goes off with three texts in a row. Everyone in the room officially agrees that I am the scum of the earth.COM uncomfortable with the whole situation. 1st text from co-worker Trish “Old man need Viagra?” 2nd text from co-worker Kelly “Tell me she’s lying Bobby?” 3rd text from co-worker Jackie “Your dick only works for me daddy?” I turn my phone off.The Best of TSBMAG. I am engaged in a great conversation with one of the bridesmaid. The wedding goes smoothly the next day. I am having a blast.

” 253 . “And as that cord glows with the warm of that connection… maybe you can even imagine a time in the future…” I’m lipping along with him. I know its coming. Buff continues on… “…like six months from now… still feeling that sense of connection… and looking back at tonight as having been the start of it. So I’ve decided to start a new series about the early years. It's hard to believe that it's been 10 years for me. I know what he’s going to say next. At that very moment I know Buff is motioning with his hand from his solar plex to hers. I’ve got the nervous giggles. I want to repeat it along with him. “Have you ever felt an instantaneous connection to someone? Like maybe as you’re sitting there looking at him… a cord of light grows from you to them” Buff’s voice is radiating from the bedroom. The Early Years: Experimenting with Speed Seduction 1998 Buff is in the bedroom with Suzanne. She flips over a card and tells me I have to drink.Social Superstar The Early Days Experimenting with Speed Seduction Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/12/2008 I’ve wanted to write in detail about some of my experiences in the community for awhile now. I sip my beer. Amazingly when I sat down to write it all came back to me crystal clear. Here are my adventures. I’m waiting for Suzanne to burst out laughing. I hope you find them informative and entertaining. Tracy is too drunk to notice. These were the craziest times because it was all so new and life transforming.

“A little. Mike smiles at me. “Yea… yea” I say. “Are you alright?” Tracy asks me. “I love him. He’s such a sweet guy. I pat the index card in my pocket. Ross Jeffries says “Those who look hungry never get fed. Ross Jeffries says “A kiss on the cheek is supplication. She kisses Mike on the cheek.” I tell him. He is on his third date this week. “So where’s Buff?” “I think he’s working” I tell her. It is filled with “weasel phrases” and “embedded commands.The Best of TSBMAG. comes over to Mike and I to say hello. “Pretend I just said something funny.COM My giggling causes beer to shoot out of my nose. 254 . Mike and I are drinking Bud Lights and discussing the past couple of weeks. The Instantaneous Connection Pattern A few weeks later we are at Fatsos. Its college night and half of Montclair State is there.” she says.” “Do I look hungry?” Mike asks. It doesn’t matter. Her face drops. Buff is notoriously missing. but I lean back and wave. already drunk.” Straight to the point she says. She turns to kiss me. At least not much of anything that makes sense. All that matters is that we don’t look hungry. “Is he coming by after work?” she asks.” Mike busts into laughter. We are talking and laughing and smiling but we’re not saying much of anything.” Suzanne.

and says. I pull out my index card and review the notes. But if it wasn’t for a tad of constipation I would probably not have made it past the pictures in the issue of Playboy I was browsing through. Instead I say.” I smile. He pulls me aside and says. “Yea… It really took me back…I didn’t even know what to say. “Really?” Angela asks.Social Superstar “Not sure. then blushes.” I tell her. A clear head beats a beer buzz for confidence.” he says. I head to the bathroom to regroup.” I say. “Okay” Suzanne says then walks away. “The girl walks right up to. “You wouldn’t believe what this girl just came up and said to me. I pour the rest of my beer in the pisser. In the back of the magazine I stumbled across an article by Peter Alson about this ugly middle aged guy named Ross Jeffries. “It was actually kind of scary. who has a cult like following of guys all claiming that he can seduce any women in a matter of minutes. Just then Mike interrupts us. 255 . A life defining moment on the bowl You never imagine that your life is going to change while taking a shit. “So I was just talking to Suzanne… and she kept repeating Buff’s name to herself over and over again.” “What?” Angela asks. ‘Imagine…me going down on you… all night long’” I say this staring directly into Angela’s eyes. looks me dead in the eyes. The card reads “Use quotes” I walk out of the bathroom and bump into Angela from Sigma Kappa. “Sweet Caroline” is blasting through the speakers and she’s trying to get me to dance with her.

I was immediately sold. Super Guru Pickup God Ross Jeffries has defied nature and figured out the secret to the universe.The Best of TSBMAG. 256 .COM Alson weaves tales of lowly computer nerds scoring blowjobs from aspiring models and playboy bunnies in coffee shop bathrooms.

I was part of the crowd. She is hiking her yellow sun dress up to her waist. She climbs on top of me. Another time I called a radio station every hour on the hour until I won tickets to a Tom Petty concert. Deanna clutches the lever of my seat and pushes me back. my Sublime tshirts. my bloodshot eyes… “A typical frat boy. There was the time my car got hit by a van full of illegal Mexicans. my other hand is wrapped around the back of her neck. She is running her hand down my chest. Tonight is a tossup.” Deanna is whispering in my ear. With her other hand she cups the back of my neck and pulls my face toward her. and an insurance check paid a trip to Cancun I didn’t think I would be able to afford. I’m free now and our mouths are locked. The seat belt has me trapped and our mouths don’t reach each others. my five o’clock shadow.” I say.Social Superstar The Falling in Love Pattern Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/12/2008 “I don’t even know you. Deanna puts something soft and damp into my hands. Other equally foolish men mistake coincidence for success. She puts her finger to my face and I put it between my lips. I’m pinned down by my seat belt. Sometimes foolish men attribute their success to blind chance. Easily assignable to coincidence. She is unbuckling me.” is how she described me to her friend. I’ve got one hand cupping her bare ass. Easily assignable to success. For the first five weeks of our Creative Non Fiction class she didn’t know I existed. I look to down and see that it’s a pair of her turquoise colored panties. tongues thrashing together. “No… why?” 257 . “All the better. “Are you wearing contacts?” I ask her. My baseball hats.

Her eyes roll back into her head. Engines igniting.COM “Just wondering. This was the big go… Mike and Buff had been using Speed Seduction frequently since the cassette tapes arrived in the mail a few weeks back. Her tongue is cleaning out my ear. Success or Coincidence? There was a moment of hesitation when the professor called on me to read my story to the class.The Best of TSBMAG. Horns are beeping. winning a spelling bee in the sixth grade.” I say. “Do you think I’m pretty?” she whispers. the birth of a child. Our assignment a week ago in class was to write a short story describing a memorable experience. She adjusts herself and guides me into her. She reaches between our legs and wraps her hand around The Boss. The perfectionist in me always found it wasn’t quite the right time. a first trip to Yankee stadium. I mainly sat in front of my mirror reciting patterns and practicing tonality. There is a reflection from the street light our car is parked under. a Garth Brooks concert. Outside cars are passing by. I lift my ass. I’ve got a tit smashed against my face. and her pale blue eyes are glowing like an Alaskan Huskies.” she says. 258 . “Beautiful. “Tell me. There were stories about a skiing in Vermont. They had the ‘jump in and learn to swim’ type attitude with the stuff. Paris in the spring time… I wrote about the first time I fell in love… She’s straddling me and our pubes are rubbing hard against each other. a death of a father. Success or coincidence? She’s fumbling with the buttons on my jeans.” I say. as she slides my jeans down.

Deanna collapses on top of me. I see them peak in but continue walking. 259 . The restriction of fucking in a Jetta is unsettling. You begin to pay attention in that special way.Social Superstar I am in Creative Non Fiction reading my story from the paper in front of me… “It was my third date with Shari when I realized what was happening. You’ve already begun to feel that connection… and grow even more attracted. I put my hand over her mouth to silence her. I’m getting a case of rug burn on my crotch. I am self conscious and a bit uncomfortable with what I’m reading… but it’s too late to stop. “And as you feel that passion growing more and more maybe to a point where you feel yourself just letting go completely as you allow this person to come deep inside releasing all those feelings that have been building and building up inside. “You don’t even know why you just have to go deep inside and find all those values that are so important to you but you just naturally link them up with this person such that you find yourself beginning to look through the eyes of attraction … cause I find when you look through the eyes of attraction. look through the eyes of desire. becoming aware… of the rhythm of your breathing… the beating of your heart… and that sense of growing fascination… such that as you continues to be aware of all this… one particular feature of the their face begins to rivet your attention… so as you just continue to keep looking… it’s like the rest of the environment disappears… and the entire world becomes this face…” I am keenly aware of the eyes of the class on me. I have to lift her a little so I can bounce her up and down on The Boss. you just want to release them in a flood and I find when you do that now with me I find you just feel so enchanted like you are now under a love spell cast upon you such that you can’t control yourself and just find yourself going wild with it” Success or Coincidence? The Boss explodes. It’s like you’re not even aware until it’s too late. that’s when you can make that connection…” The Falling in Love Pattern Deanna is grunting and growling. Her eyes are closed which is good because a couple students are walking past our car. First.

COM Don’t Buy the Cheap Sex Toys Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/22/2008 I’ve always been pretty experimental in the bedroom… dare I say… kinky. For all her flaws… I do say. This place had everything I ever dreamed about. There was the time we lost the key to the handcuffs…. I wanted everything. my choice was narrowed down to a cock ring. There were a handful of items marked down for clearance. I’ve found girls willing to let me indulge in my whims. fruits and vegetables. voyeurism… we did it all. bondage.. One day I ventured off to the holy grail of perverted fun. right from the start. For those of you unaware of what anal beads are. Role playing. I was a kid in the candy store. edible panties. The time I jokingly asked my ex to pee on me… and she did! The time I bought the super large dildo to play with on her… and then suddenly felt inadequate.The Best of TSBMAG. I have a wild imagination. We were like a couple of perverts trying to see what we could come up with next. or anal beads.. But nothing was worse than the time I cheeped out on the sex toys. The Pleasure Palace. With the amount of money in my pocket. Only I had very little money. I went with the anal beads for the low low price of $4. Lucky for me. There was the time I took a roll of film of my ex in compromising positions… that mysteriously disappeared when we went to the CVS to pick them up. she was gung ho in the bedroom.99. these are a series of beads attached to each other usually by a string with a handy retrieval ring. This was back when I was dating my first girlfriend Jillian. blindfolds. Luckily. But what I’ve noticed while mulling over my exploits is that often these whims have turned out to end on a sour note. I spotted a discount shelf. The package promised that if I inserted them into her ass… and 260 . sue me.

The string which had five beads going in… had come out with four. I’m doing her pretty hard missionary. "What's wrong?" "One of the balls didn’t come out" I tell her. She jumps up and grabs the string from under the pillow. 261 . We tried them out in her vagina first. It is obvious that the bead slipped over the last knot. I’ve got her legs spread over her head. and she likes it. She starts panicking. But I can be pretty persuasive. in and out. Jillian starts asking. By this time. That was until I looked down at the string in my hand. In and out. They were still pretty lubed up from her pussy juice." Things started out amusing enough with the beads. Wailing away. I sold her on the "new orgasmic heights. It doesn’t. She squirmed a bit… but soon enough I’m digging away. right? Jillian wasn’t thrilled with my new toy. She only mildly liked it when I did her anal. Just as the two of us reach orgasm I pull the string in one quick flick of the wrist. She did a giant pelvic thrust… but then flashed me a reassuring smile to let me know she enjoyed. I started poking my finger around her ass trying to warm her up to it. so I reach under her ass and grab the ring and get ready to yank. I was a proud man. I take this as my cue to start sliding the anal beads in. As our session got steamier. so they went in without a fight. I pray the bead will pop out. Worth a shot. But my face must have given it away. I quickly tried to hide the string under the pillow. and usually felt dirty about it afterwards.Social Superstar then pulled them out right as she climaxed… she would reach new orgasmic heights. Jillian starts making her "I’m going to cum" face. She reaches her hand around to her ass and starts holding her anus open while jumping up and down.

she wasn’t the most mentally stable girl. I want to reach in. 262 . I calm her down enough to walk her into the bathroom. I say "Maybe we should go to the Health Center on campus." I take from her reaction that wasn’t an option. "I feel it" she screams. She begins pushing. I get behind her and start prodding around. but I am afraid I’ll just push it back further." I say. "It's right there. Look and see if you can see it. I open the door and peak in. Jillian has her ass raised above the bowl and is shaking it violently. I take my two fingers and pry apart her anus.The Best of TSBMAG. "Maybe you should try taking a shit. and growling all over again. I can feel it. grunting. I sit her naked body on the toilet and tell her to push like she constipated… push like she’s trying to get a baby out. Now she’s crying so loud I can’t concentrate." She kneels down over the bowl and lunges her ass into the air. See if they have any suggestions. She starts pushing. But nothing is falling out. The grunts and growls that were coming out the bathroom would have scared small children. "You better get this fucking thing out of my ass. After a few minutes they stop. She starts hyperventilating. She’s screaming. Miraculously the little purple bead appears… but just as I’m about to grab it her anus closes shut and sucks it back in. "Push" I tell her. She’s making some nauseating faces and I have to leave the room.COM If you remember from previous mentions of Jillian." She looks like she’s going claw my face off.

I pick the thing up and flush it down the toilet. I walk in the room and grab the string and flush all the beads down the toilet.Social Superstar "Push again. is why you don’t buy the cheap sex toys. And that. The bead plops onto the floor. harder this time" I demand. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" she screams. She’s pushing so hard one of the veins in her forehead seems it's going to burst. my friends. 263 . I’m really hoping a turd doesn’t pop out along with the bead. I’d have to dump her.

one of my girlfriend’s cousins… Anna and her big fake titties… then Sofia and her rebellious tomboy attitude… but the noise is just too distracting. That’s what happens when you cram 9 people into a three bedroom apartment. But I’m thinking now… the older she is… 264 . I beg one last time… “A goodbye blow job…please?” 9:25 I’m in the backseat of Sofia’s car and I’m trying to calculate just how old she is. But just outside the door there are seven different Spanish voices continually reminding me that my time in the bathroom is limited. She rolls her eyes and tells me no. I float different pictures through my mind… first. 8:44 I’ve finally got some momentum going. I give up. And normally I wouldn’t have cared much. c’mon other people need to use the bathroom” my girlfriend shouts in … Everything is fucked. My dick goes limp. my mind trying to hold a fantasy long enough to rub one out.The Best of TSBMAG. I start unrolling some toilet paper to finish into… “Bobby. I pull her close and grind my hard-on into her.COM That Drunken ight in Medellin Story Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/18/2008 8:40 pm My dick is in my left hand… my right hand is fumbling through the medicine cabinet for some kind of lube… I’m squatting over the toilet. Privacy is nonexistent. Sofia could be 25 or 40 and I wouldn’t be surprised. 9:05 My girl gives me a little peck on my lips. She tells me not to be so grumpy and that I better have a good time tonight. The most action I’ve gotten all week in this chastity ward of an apartment. I finish putting on my shirt.

“I no care” I say and fill the shot glass. There are three bottles of the stuff on the table. She shakes her finger no again. 9:51 Shot number one goes down smoothly. a banker… a cowboy. Because in a brown eyed world… the blue eyed man is king. “Muy Bien! Mucho gusto!” He asks me why my girlfriend didn’t come. In fact. The waiters are walking around dressed like typical town people… there is a priest.. and a slight bit creepy. I lift the glass and down the shot myself. She shakes her finger no.. 265 . Sofia notices my curiosity and says “Aguardiente. He puts his arm around me. a farmer. I am happy that there will be at least one person I can communicate with here tonight. .Social Superstar the more likely she’d be up for doing something if something should happen to come up… 9:44 We get into the bar… it’s themed like a typical Colombian town. We knock glasses and shoot them. you like?” I smile. “You like the Colombian girls?” he asks. 10:00 Jim calls me over to him. I am doing the obligatory kiss on the check to bunch of chubby Spaniards… the loud alpha male of the group introduces himself in English. I try pouring Sofia a shot. 9:46 I follow the cousins to a table filled with about eight or nine Colombians. The room we wind up in is themed like a cathedral. His name is Jim. And the town bum… 9:45 I walk through smiling… making sure they notice… And they always notice. He hands me a shot.. “So you can have some fun tonight!” he says. “I no like” she says in broken English. “Si” I say. I explain that she had a wedding rehearsal … and has to get up early tomorrow for the wedding. I smell the glass to make sure it wasn’t water. a nun. Each room with a different theme.

She doesn’t know how dirty I can get. I fumble for the bottle and begin pouring another shot. Things get ugly quick on the dance floor. They shake their fingers no. I pour the three of us shots and we gulp them down. I’m a little embarrassed by my blunder. 10:18 266 . 10:13 Pretty soon I’ve made both of us uncomfortable. 10:11 I turn to Sofia. My lack of rhythm is apparent. I want to make conversation. Sofia not wanting to be seen dancing with the gringo… pawns me off on her sister. 10:14 I get back just in time for another shot. She doesn’t know daddy. It’s too loud to deal with language barriers.COM 10:02 Jim calls over an old fatty. I try… but it’s useless. I fill a few glasses and try to hand the sixteen year olds shots. For all intensive purposes I’ll assume it’s sixteen. My constant humping of her leg and staring at her tits has seemingly offended her… I put my tail between my legs and head back to the table. Jim introduces me to the fatty… his wife. Her sister wants to play dirty.The Best of TSBMAG. She takes my hand and leads me to the dance floor. Some young girls… that can’t be older than sixteen. I assume he is trying to hook me up with her… I give him the thumbs down. 10:16 There are a few new faces at our table. Sofia grabs my arm… and tells me in her adorable broken English to “slow down or I get too crazy” She’s probably right… but I’m past the point of reason. I start to wish I Googled the age of consent down here. I push the glasses toward them again. but nothing another shot of Aguardiente won’t cure.

He looks at the group of girls and nods at me. And that’s all you’re going to do. Yea right!!! This is where things get blurry. As we are dancing Jim comes up behind his daughter and sandwiches her against me. Here are the definite memories I have: … Gulping down another four or five shots of Aguardiente … Jim’s daughter shaking her finger no as I try to lick her ear …Jim’s fat wife pulling me off her daughter and then scolding her daughter in public Here are the fuzzy memories I have: 267 . Jim seemingly pleased… heads back to the table and leaves me and his daughter alone. 10:22 Time for a piss break. and then you’re going go home and jerk off.. .Social Superstar Jim sees me trying to make conversation with the girls and comes over to us.it's a moral test of yourself. Because when you can be loyal… that’s meaningful… So you’re going to go out there… drink your drink… be friendly… not too friendly.. I give him two big thumbs up. He actually pushes us closer together. whether or not you can maintain loyalty. 10:25 I regroup in the bathroom. Before I have time to explain… he tells me to dance with his daughter. I look back at him over my shoulder… now he gives me the thumbs up. She is in the middle of us and I’m grinding lower and lower with her. 10:19 He introduces me to the sixteen year old… his daughter.

I am completely dehydrated and desperately want water. I decide to piss before going to sleep. but thought of going into the kitchen to face the family is terrifying. Naked. Only I’m not in our room. Hearing his anger the aunt comes into the room and in Spanish intervenes. She is not turned on my aggressive drunken behavior… or my breath which reeks of puke. Naked. I walk to the bathroom.The Best of TSBMAG. I retreat to my bed. In the other room I hear the Spanish chatter of the entire family having breakfast. I have vague flashes of the night before… I panic. I try for a few minutes to jerk off. I’m standing buck naked in the room where the aunt. I take off all of my clothes and demand sex. It’s not going to happen. I momentarily snap back into consciousness and walk into the hallway. on my bed. naked. Sofia and Anna are sleeping. I close my eyes and go back to sleep.COM … Sofia pushing me into a car with a random Spanish guy … Driving through the mountains of Medellin thinking I’m being kidnapped …throwing up in a port-a-potty on the side of the road: Here is where things get ugly: I stumble into the apartment and stalk out my girlfriend. I go caveman on her. This time I wonder into my girl’s cousin Adolfo’s room. They are staring at me and laughing and pointing for me to go back into the hallway and to my own room. I start to crawl in bed with him. 268 . 9:20 am I wake up alone. He wakes up and flips out. Only they are not sleeping. (Most likely explaining that I’m a drunken mess who has no clue what room he is in… or probably even what country he is in) The two of them guide my naked ass back to my room. I head back into our room. I try to wake her up.

They are nice about it… but are openly amused. When I expose myself from the room… the entire family starts mocking me in Spanish. She asks me “What the hell happened last night” 11:53 I do the walk of shame to the bathroom. All I can think about was how pronounced the “shrinkage” was….Social Superstar 11:40 My girlfriend wakes me up and tells me that I have to get dressed for her friend’s wedding. 269 .

This means that if you consistently think of the lack in your life (of women. building attraction. How will you look after you’ve achieved better game? How will you act? What kind of girls will you be dating? Sleeping with? What will a day in your life look like once you’ve got this area of your life mastered? How will you feel? What kind of thoughts will be running through your mind? These are all questions that you cannot ignore. money. But if you train your mind to see abundance (of women. Have you read the book The Secret? Or how about Real Magic? Or Think and Grow Rich? These three books (if read and implemented correctly) are worth their weight in gold.The Best of TSBMAG. These three books all explore the ancient principle that your mind will create whatever reality you present it.. money) the universe will provide you a life of abundance. This step is more important than any lesson you will learn from here on out. The title of this series is 31 Days to Better Game… but “better game” has a different meaning for everyone reading this. 270 . Having a clearly defined end result means knowing exactly where you want to be 31 days from now. and friendship) the universe will continue to provide you a life of lack. managing a relationship.. In order to fully experience and appreciate the lessons you’ll receive over the next 31 days you need to have a clearly defined end result. If you have had difficulty with talking to women. or any other area of your life… until you develop a clearly defined goal for yourself your mind will continue producing the same results you’ve always gotten.COM 31 Days to Better Game Day 1 Designing Your Life Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/10/2008 The first step you need to take to improve any area of your life is determining your desired outcome.

As you run this image through your mind. write ” I am having sex the girl I’ve desired” and so on. Now I want you to write the most descriptive. the way your voice sounds. You need to close your eyes and spend the next thirty minutes visualizing yourself as your Ideal Self. See your ideal life. the thoughts running through your mind. Imagine clearly what you will look like. Next Every morning when you awaken… take out that piece of paper and read it a few times to yourself. summary of this new you. Then close your eyes imagine this reality. The idea here is to create a blueprint of the life you want. thought out. You need to read this piece of paper and be instantly transported into that reality. It needs to be as detailed as possible. and act like once you’ve mastered this area of your life. suppose in your mind you saw yourself surrounded by a set of beautiful women and they were all laughing and having a good time… you would write “I am confident around large groups of beautiful women and easily create enjoyable conversation while building attraction. But I’m going to safely say that it is magic. I want you to trust me to give this a chance. See your ideal self. Take a pen and paper with you. feel like. It needs to be filled with emotions and feelings. Clearly imagine the women and note the way you interact with them. I felt the same way years ago when I was presented with this concept. Your Homework Everyone reading this needs to set aside one hour in a quiet place. For example. 271 . I want all of you reading this to put aside your personal opinions and judgments and reservations.Social Superstar If this sounds new age and hokey… wait a minute. pay attention to the way you walk. Write everything in the present tense. visualize yourself in the company of the woman you want to be with. After you’ve spent about thirty minutes just completely immersed in this “new you” stop your visualizations and grab your pen and paper. clearly defined.” If during your visualization you saw yourself having unbelievable sex with a perfect 10.

” Every night before you go to bed. There is no hard work involved. I want each and everyone one of you to do this for one month. At the end of the 31 days I want feedback on this exercise… I only want feedback from those of you that followed it every day exactly as I’ve stated. You will be tempted to let your negativity and doubt creep in and tell you this isn’t possible. See if so real that it feels like you're dreaming. I’m not asking much. I’m just asking you to spend a half an hour in the morning. The rest of you can keep your excuses I don’t want to hear them..COM The entire time you're visualizing this life… let your mind go. continue to talk to yourself positively. and a half an hour in the evening visualizing the life you want.. repeat the ritual of the morning. “I am always meeting and attracting new interesting girls. Even if you deviate from your “ideal self” in your current reality. or remind yourself of your shortcoming or flaws… Clear your mind of the negativity and focus solely on “ideal life. Don’t slack.talk in the positive. Lay there holding that image (with feeling) firmly in your mind. I’m not asking you to approach 10 sets a night….” Throughout the day try to remember to keep your self. Those that choose to follow this… I know that I will be hearing miraculous stories! If you want some further reading on this subject I highly recommend reading The Secret 272 .The Best of TSBMAG.

inner game problems boils down to two things: your experience and your mindset. I’m going to get into both of these. Experience: When people ask me how I developed my “Rock solid confidence”. and give some personal insights. It’s a major sticking point for nearly everyone who has trouble talking to women and it’s a problem that can be difficult to fix as well. “Practice”. When you think about what confidence actually is you realize that it's simply doing something that you’ve done enough times to be comfortable with. Every problem you run into with not just women. It’s only when were thrown into situations that are unfamiliar to us that we start to lose confidence in ourselves. So what is it? To me. but I can tell you how I overcame the very same problems. I can’t convince you how to think or look at life differently. Inner game is also a topic that I think can only be discussed from a personal level.Social Superstar Day 2 Developing Inner Game Written by Cajun Originally Published: 06/12/2008 Inner game is probably one of the most popular subjects in the community. only you can. so hopefully by the end of this article you’ll have a clearer understanding of what exactly it is that you need to work on to fix your own issues. but life itself. The sad and somewhat ironic reality is that most men are not comfortable talking to women simply because they don’t talk to women! It’s a negative feedback loop that’s perpetuated by a fear of “what might go wrong”. I always answer the same. that is. and hope that you can learn from my experiences. can be attributed to one of these two areas. since it tends to be rooted in a lifetime’s worth of negative beliefs that are based on things like fear and rejection. This is bullshit! To be scared of the possible 273 .

We experience the outer circle. told off. but the best advice I can give you is to simply accept it. The sooner you realize that rejection is a necessary evil. What does this mean? As far as any of us know. Getting used to rejection isn’t easy.The Best of TSBMAG. We are now learning through quantum physics that reality is actually the inner circle. That is. I remember when I first started out with this stuff I used to get drinks thrown in my face. if you’d rather). your own. just accept that it’s a completely normal.COM negative outcomes is to be scared of the very thing that enables you to get better! Think about it this way. or the world around us. 274 . Mind Set: Most of us grew up in a society that believed in a 2 concentric circle model of reality. The first few weeks were rough. when you were learning to ride a bike. that our consciousness was independent of it…but recently this all changed. our consciousness. reality. from your subconscious mind. That is. Life is a game. don’t get mad at her or yourself. the outer circle being reality. and that our consciousness is the outer circle. there may only be 1 reality. we create our own reality with our thoughts (Or beliefs. and it’s a game that a lot of people are scared to play. it took me a while before I got used to rejection enough that I could understand where I went wrong. even then you realized that the reward was worth the risk. the sooner you can come to terms with it and move past it. whether any of us actually exist or not is irrelevant. Don’t be one of them. but you got on anyway because you saw how much fun all the other kids were having. or simply ignored. and the inner circle being our consciousness. reality exists inside our mind. were you too scared to get on because of a fear that you might fall down? Maybe. Well this is the same thing. through our inner circle. Who’s to say I’m not a figment of your imagination. The truth is. This is how we believed reality worked. and necessary part of the learning process. You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs. It’s possible. writing this entire article out to send a message to YOU. your reality. don’t go home.

” Your welcome. Now. let’s say. like I said.” Sound a little like the matrix? Well that’s ok. but this “game” already exists and it’s called reality. The five senses are so accurately programmed that there is no detectable difference to reality. In fact you can have. let’s say. The AI is so smart you can’t tell it’s not a real person. Think of it as your “console hack”" I’m sure you saw this coming. and I know that if down the road I ever forget everything that I’ve learned in the past few years. and how they work. and be anything you want in this program as long as you ask for it using these “beliefs”. I replied with the following: “Think of it this way: what if. It has since become my mantra. then all you have to do is believe that you ARE a rich Casanova. What does the paper say? “The secret to becoming amazing at attracting women is…to remember that you already are. I can only give advice on inner game from my own personal perspective and this is simply how I believe reality works. Cajun. a rich Casanova in the game. 275 . all I will have to do is read this piece of paper and it will all come back. You become who you believe you are. The trick is you have to actually believe it. So. 15 years from now programmers invent this computer game that is virtually identical to reality. if you want to be.Social Superstar I recently received an email from a student of mine asking about the power of beliefs. and you will become one. you get to play this game. I’ll end this article with something that I’ve never written about before: I remember the very night that I became good at attracting women. he says this: “This software is programmed to work intuitively with your brain. but the programmer tells you some hints on how to play. and then the program takes care of the rest. I remember because I had an epiphany that night and it was so mindblowing that I had to write it down as soon as I came home.

hair style. He had the less-thanhandsome Strauss shave his balding head. posture and grooming tips.The Best of TSBMAG. What I did not include on that list but is equally important is maintaining a fit body. get a tan. I’m not saying that you have to look like David Beckham… but you know deep inside if you’re body can be improved upon. 276 . The list includes simple to improve areas like skin color. If you want further information on designing a weight loss/muscle gain plan read this free personal trainer program-the site has like five hundred articles on every aspect of weight training and nutrition. but you will begin to feel much more attractive. smiling. and change his wardrobe.” I wrote a post a couple months ago called 10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive. there is no excuse not hit to hit the gym.COM Day 3 Updating Your Look Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published:06/13/2008 There is a misused phrase being tossed around in regards to attracting women… “Looks don’t matter.” There is no denying that physical attractiveness makes it easier for attraction to take place. Like Strauss says. If you’ve read The Game you know that the first advice Mystery gave Neil Strauss was to improve upon his look. hit the gym. But you don’t need to be naturally good looking to make a good first impression. “You’ve got to present your best self. If you look in the mirror and see things jiggling. If you’re unsure of how to lose that extra weight check out this article about shedding unwanted pounds… if you’re looking to gain some muscle read this article on bulking up for the summer. grow a goatee. By just implementing these 10 tips you will begin to not only look more attractive. I highly recommend reading over that list. If you’ve seen the before and after pictures you know what a drastic improvement these simple steps made.” The phrase should have been worded “Looks only matter so much.

But I do believe in using clothes and accessories as a way to attract positive attention. Although the article was geared toward high school students there is advice on creating your image that can be applied to all age groups. The article also talks about creating a presence and takes quite a bit from the classic article The 7 Elements of Charisma.Social Superstar After you’ve improved upon the areas of your appearance that need some work… it's time to update your wardrobe. No matter what area of your physical appearance (if any) needs an overhaul there is more than enough information contained in this lesson to get you well on your way. If you still have questions regarding how to go about updating your life you might find an article I wrote for my How to Be Popular in High series helpful. Remembers just because “Looks only matter so much” you shouldn’t use that as an excuse to be lazy about your appearance. Today’s Homework Today you need to make the necessary changes to present your best self. Would you be attracted to a girl who isn’t doing her best to present herself to you? 277 . More importantly is dressing in a way that promotes your self confidence. If you’ve got little or no sense of fashion than read through our men’s fashion articles here at the site. We’ve had a couple fashion consultants contributing articles to make your choices easier. I am not a firm believer in peacocking in the sense that Mystery and Style teach. If you’re still looking for more advice than I would recommend purchasing Brad P’s Fashion Bible.

poor tonality. It just means that everything you learn needs to be implemented at all times. start 278 . If you’ve just read an article about flirting.The Best of TSBMAG. It’s because a successful salesman is constantly marketing himself while the other 90% do their 9-5 in the office and call it a day.COM Day 4 Always be Advertising Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/16/2008 In a common sale’s office 10% of the salesmen make 90% of the money. If I had to name the most inspiring thing I got out of the weekend it was Adam’s ability to always “be on. learn to “be alpha” but they sit in their house all week waiting for the weekend to practice game. Always be opening sets. I spent this weekend with AFC Adam Lyons from Pua Training in New York.” And he’s right. study lines. breathed. approach anxiety. The biggest mistake most guys tend to make while trying to improve their game is they think that it only counts when they are at a bar or club. They read books. Always dress to impress. Every lesson that you learn throughout these 31 days needs to become a new habit in your life. No matter who he was talking to he was projecting the same charismatic personality. and slept game. He lived.” It is so hard for them because all week they’ve created a pattern of bad posture. Always strive to make your conversations memorable. Always be chatting up strangers. Always be presenting your best self. A lot guys wonder how come some nights it is so hard to get “in state. Is it because they are that much better salesman? No. then they expect to miraculously be the life of the party come Saturday night. He didn’t wait until heading to the clubs at night to go into game mode. Does that mean all you should care about is game? Hell no. and AFC tendencies…. boring conversation.” Adam made the comment several times that he “is game.

that the best leads come when you least expect it. you will find that it becomes a lot easier to get “in state” since you will be spending most of your time in the right frame of mind. Always leave the house expecting to meet the girl of your dreams. Once you get in the habit of always reinforcing the skills you’ve been learning. Your co-workers who used to ignore you will be asking you to come hang out with them. you need to always be reinforcing these skills. More importantly though. 279 . like the most successful salesmen. is that you will find. Because you just don’t know when you will bump into her.Social Superstar flirting immediately. If you’re always “on” you’ll find that you’ll naturally be attracting more women into your life. I don’t care if you have to flirt with your sixty year old neighbor…. The counter girl at your local bank will be dropping you IOIs.

wealth. In Wisconsin we deer hunt and my Dad always told me to never cough because a deer’s hearing is much better than a human’s… Well a woman’s “status” senses are far superior to a man’s. act and by their body language. fame. Not only will landing a guy like that make her life better.COM Day 5 Being High Status Written by Mack Tight Originally Published: 06/17/2008 I was reading Bobby’s recent post “Never Show Emotion When She Walks Away” and all I could think was “could that dude make it any more obvious that he was low status”? Let me explain… When you think of “high status males” who do you think of? Donald Trump… George Clooney… Kobe Bryant… your favorite politician… Now if any of these guys had an attractive girl make out with them and run off would they set around and pout like a tit baby about it? Fuck no… They are flooded by a large quantity of attractive women in their life… and even if you temporarily took away their money. Because with “high status” comes most of the traits women desire in men like security. …yes. it will make the life of her kids better and even make her friends jealous and envious. any woman would still be able to read that they are high status within minutes of meeting them by the way they talk. clothes. Now you might ask why “status” is so important to women. cars and made them wear a disguise.The Best of TSBMAG. women are actually very competitive with each other but in more subtle ways than men… 280 . power. social acceptance and notoriety.

if you go to a car dealership to deal on a car. If on the other hand you don’t give a shit when dealing with a hot girl you’re showing your supply is low and your demand is high. you always want to give them the impression that there are other dealerships that are in the hunt for your business… 281 . Supply and demand is not unique to women and men either… Why is gas $4 a gallon? Supply and demand! Why are diamonds so expensive? Supply and demand! (Thanks to DeBeers) It is like your status is a publicly traded stock when you go into a club and your every action makes it go up and down in value. Here’s another analogy from my childhood… When I was a kid I collected sports cards. There was a term called a “common” for sports cards of a player no one wanted. “Commons” were ummm… common… …don’t be a common! The guy in Bobby’s story showed to everyone in the bar and most importantly to the girl that he was a “common” by gawking at her and pouting. Now similarly.Social Superstar So how can women sense your status? They can sense your supply versus your demand… If you are clingy and needy it shows to them that you have a low demand and a high supply. This raises his status to them. the attractive women are going to have a harder time landing this guy’s business. It is quite obvious that an attractive girl kissing him was a “big deal” and a rare occurrence in his life… That made it quite obvious to everyone that he was “low status”. Now if a guy’s supply is high and demand low and attractive women is the commodity.

Negging “Negging” is defined as saying something to an attractive girl that subtly shows her that you are not caught in a hypnotic trance over her beauty.The Best of TSBMAG. I had women cold approaching ME about the shirt and I went to town from there. Now let me switch things up and touch on some community concepts that hit on the “high status” point… Peacocking Do you think wearing a pair of Sketchers. What can I say. some old carpenter pants and a boring t-shirt of your local major sports team screams “I’m high status”? To me it screams “I don’t care how I look. I even had some girls who BUSTED on me just like the guys did but I was able to turn the tables and get attraction from them.COM If you go to a job interview you want to give the interviewers the impression that there are many companies of courting you… …you are living in a world of opportunities and abundance. 282 . For example. some like dogs and cats but I LOVE MONKEYS! I had guys busting on me about it but I could HANDLE it. I bet everyone of those douche bags who were busting on me went out and bought the same shirt the next day… …but I have a feeling they had no luck with it because they could not properly handle the reactions. I want to fit in and I’m scared to stand out”! That’s what “peacocking” is all about… having the balls to stand out… …and I’m not talking about even wearing goggles and a fuzzy hat. Always give the impression that you have options in your life even if you don’t. I recently bought a bright green Paul Frank t-shirt with Julius the monkey on it. High status men do not care what others think.

take Mystery’s “its funny how your nose twitches when you talk” or Neil Strauss’ routine of picking a piece of lint off a girl’s shirt. She is accustomed to being put on a pedestal by guys staring at her. Instead he is probably going to vibe with her about cool things. Do you think a rock star that is in town for a tour is going to barrage a girl he just met with a bunch of interview questions? What’s your name? What’s your age? Where are you from? What is your job? HELL NO! For him to ask such personal questions to a girl with them both knowing he will be in a different city the next day would be silly. Basically you are showing her that in a sea of low value ass-kissing chumps you are the one prized high value man who is accustomed to interacting with girls of her level of beauty on a routine basis. It may sound mean but women WANT to come off their pedestals to meet a high value man like yourself! Giving/Taking Value I made a post a while back by Mehow about giving value by being the value. It does a good job of differentiating how needy and high status guys communicate with women. Maybe they’ll talk about music or pop culture. Many people who are new to the community do not understand how to calibrate proper negging. He might bring up some stories about something crazy that happened at his last tour stop in New York City. buying her drinks.Social Superstar Calling it “negging” was a bad move because people outside of the community assume it is just about putting down women. 283 . VERY subtle comments that could be taken as a backhanded compliment. You need to differentiate “negging” from being an obnoxious asshole. It is not like you are calling the girl a “bitch” or saying she is “ugly”. For example. some examples involve VERY. Sure. endlessly approaching her and showering her with complements… …but you quickly knock her off the pedestal to defuse her defenses.

A high status man has many options with quality women just as a quality woman has many options with low status men. So there you go… I hope I did a good job of explaining high status to you.The Best of TSBMAG. So show them that you are high status from the start and you will make yourself the exception and not the norm. so it is completely worthless! High status men want to test women before they even care about their personal life. Mack Tight 284 . ONLY if the interaction progresses to the point that it EXCEEDS his normal standards does he care to learn the back of baseball card stats of a girl’s personal life. I also hope my examples gave you some ideas on how you can raise your status to women even higher.COM Guys often interact with beautiful women by asking endless personal questions and they usually never end up seeing or talking to the girl EVER AGAIN anyway. It’s casual. The key is that quality women only have limited opportunities to interact with truly high status men. They begin by building comfort and attraction by telling interesting high value stories (such as the rock star’s crazy night at his NYC tour stop).

“man. I thought that. While they may have some approach anxiety. it is issue number one amongst the clients with whom I work. seems to be enjoying her time with you.I was completely stilted when you’d throw me into a bar full of people my age. And listen. well. initially. If you’ve ever been talking to a woman and thought to yourself. she was bound to be attracted to me. 285 . surprising and rewarding each other. Flirting is YOU and HER – your personality and hers – sharing some basic information and making it more fun. only to see her attention wane as the conversation starts to get. hitting it with a bend. so much as it is that they are worried the conversation will flatten out and get boring. The inability to be fun and flirtatious is one of the most common problems that men face when they’re learning to get better with women. it is not necessarily because they are afraid of getting rejected. I wasn’t exactly a huge hit around the college bars in Ann Arbor. and add some much-needed texture to the conversation. surprise… it is how you might communicate with your lawyer or your professor. There’s nothing worse than a girl who. somehow. emotion. lame. economics and business. Flirting is conversational play. To this day. My interests used to lie exclusively in history. and while this proved an asset in my talks with “adults. I’m even boring myself!” then you know exactly what I’m talking about here. once a girl sensed how deep and concerned about the real world I was. Needless to say. if you never learned to communicate any other way.Social Superstar Day 6 How to be a Good Flirt Written by Christian Hudson Originally Published 06/18/2008 I was a very boring guy until I turned about 22. A flat conversation is one without any spark. that’s fine – you’re in the company of many other men. I like to think of it as taking a flat note. MI. But let’s learn how to flirt.”. Its two people talking about… anything they want (it definitely does not need to be logical)… and pushing. pulling.

Swooosh – instant texture. You know. (Little reward for playing along). and probably not even as interesting. INTERESTING CONVERSATION F: So where are you from? M: Hmmmm. put your hand on her shoulder and lean into her ear. But perhaps an example is in order.” to “that’s too hard” – we’ll use one of those in a later example). I’m from Stains. We’ve made a little game 286 . step back. promise. Now.COM and running it through a flanger. our man is relaying facts. It's just outside London. This conversation is as flat as a deflated blimp. F: Ok… how is it there? M: It’s pretty nice. (Now. (Here you’re creating a little game – more fun) F: Ohhh. How about you. FUN. Let’s consider a few tweaks. I’ll tell you what it's like… (here you’re “headlining” what you’re going to say. look her in the eye. ranging from “I don’t know. Key point: the girl is not having FUN sharing this information. saying quietly)… but you can’t tell anyone else. M: Ohhh! So close. (Note: there are about a million responses she could have here. F: Stains… what’s that like? M: Ok. You get the Silver Star. London. I’m from… guess where I’m from. building up anticipation.The Best of TSBMAG. but we’ve texturized it with some personality. uh… Stains. Nope. DULL. M: Cool. and say) Promise? F: Ok. ahhh. it was a good place to grow up. where are you from? Here. so check it out… What have we done here? We’ve conveyed the exact same information. BORING CONVO F: So where are you from? M: Right.

screening and qualifying . a lot more FUN. punished them for asking me about myself. 287 . about how to tell if the guy they’re talking to is going to treat them to Per Se dinners and weekends in the Hamptons. but there’s no algorithm for knowing which – you just need to practice and develop a feel for it. There’s a whole mess of other things going on in here . and the process of sharing information. Think Happy Californian Stoner/Surfer. guess what I do. (And she’s not pleased about it!) M: Ok. shuts down the conversation. One option was to say “Are you qualifying me already?” which girls usually take as offensive and which. as you’re getting away from the question at that point). you’ll be golden.Social Superstar of getting it out of you. Too often. I used to answer this question in one of two ways. so let’s consider another example… a girl asks you what you do. because I’m not being truthful.” which is obviously a lie and which. (I wouldn’t play a “reward/punishment” game here if it's early in the conversation. The other thing I’d say was something like “I’m a garbage man.subtle frame control. tell you what… (thinking)… I’ll give you three options. or have some other presentation style that just smacks of “seduction community. I want to add too – you don’t have to be a dancing ape with your delivery on this one. (She’s going to have to work harder than her lame ‘How to Separate the Duds from the Studs in NYC’ guidebook told her she would) F: I don’t know.” You can be totally chill. I’m a…. act gay. 95% of the time. So what’s a fun way to stand out when a girl asks you this question? F: So what do you do? M: Hmmm. our models of fun behavior and delivery are guys who are way over the top. there must be a book that girls receive when they move here. It could be anything. it's made the conversation. This is literally the first question out of the mouth of every girl you meet here in NYC. Ok. and as long as your delivery includes some warmth and a smile. That line works with certain girls.but most importantly. he was doing a lot better with the ladies. needless to say. These exact conversation fragments happened with a boot camp client not long ago. after coaching him on how to rock the second one.

interesting) F: Ahhh. And so on. Of course. F: So you’re an entrepreneur! M: Yeah. This is a conversation I have. (Give her a little hug) F: Wait what do you mean partial credit? M: Well… I’ve actually done all three. boring version: 288 .e. you’re wicked smart.The Best of TSBMAG. M: I know. (Lots of detail. and helps me avoid talking about the coaching stuff because I’ll steer it into talking about jello shots or software. F: Haha. right… M: Option 3: I run a software company that builds security software for biotech firms who want to protect sensitive data from being stolen by insiders (sounds legit. option 1… I run a beverage company that produces and markets caffeinated gelatin shots in little one ounce packets. Damn. ok… M: Option 2: I consult with men on their lifestyles and communications skills – kind of like Hitch – to help them meet cooler women and have better social lives (too ridiculous to be true – or is it?) F: hahahaha. right? But you’ve got the power of your copious intellect. M: Ok. if you play guitar you could say “I’m a musician working to get his first breakthrough demo track laid down). described as if they were jobs (i. it's time to ask the girl what she does. frequently almost verbatim. fun. but no kiss on the cheek yet. Here’s the flat. the way that you present something like this may vary. M: Wow. Now. one way you might want to present it is to throw in your job. so I’m going to guess option 3. along with two hobbies. described very interestingly. that sounds good. too complicated to be a lie) F: Okkkkkk… that’s tough. exactly.COM F: Ok. you’re like… kind of right! You get partial credit! That deserves a hug.

no you’re NOT. this texture. She has FUN telling it to you because the conversation itself is a little series of surprises. I just don’t have anything good to relate. no you’re NOT. OutOfHere. Get. But it sounds exciting. why (she’s probably smiling now too)…. I have no idea what a technical designer is (both laugh). More often than not. (Smiling as if she just made your day when she told you that) F: Wait.Social Superstar M: So what do you do? F: I’m a technical designer for Jill Sanders. And ultimately. Get. I’m just messing with ya. to what a girl does. more playfulness. (Smiling as if she just made your day when she told you that) F: Wait. Let’s consider another example. Tell me about it. But if the attitude you take with you into your interactions is “what would give this conversation some texture. makes a girl feel much better about sharing information with you.? M: Ah. uh… what’s that? I meet girls every day and they tell me they do something that I’ve never heard of. So what can you do with that?! Well… M: So what do you do? F: I’m a technical designer for Jill Sanders M: Wait a minute. Same information. 289 . but with a more common job: M: So what do you do? F: I’m a sales representative for [insert big faceless company here] M: Wait a minute. How’d you get into sales? See? Creating this playful tension. immediately. why (she’s probably smiling now too)…. more texture. some fun?” then you’ll find yourself flirting pretty effortlessly.? M: Actually. We’ve barely scratched the surface in terms of all the techniques you can use to flirt. this is what flirting is all about. OutOfHere. M: Ok.

and create conversation that just flows from it.up artist to come out with an innovative. When it comes to opening girls I’ve found that several things will make all the difference.) and stay away from the classic Mystery or Strauss “who lies more” or “what 80’s pop duo should I name my dog after?” I’ve found that guys who are using these elaborate canned openers are getting stuck in routine mode and not going on to develop natural conversation skills. But there are perfect ways to approach and deliver your opening line. fail proof. are you guys friendly?. This is why in the beginning a lot of coaches recommend using canned openers. Most of the times these girls will be expecting you to open 290 . The less thought out and planned an interaction is the more natural and relaxed you will appear. make you look cool. Personally. You’re mentally in the wrong state.. Once you start scanning your mind for things to say it's over. guaranteed to work opening line to say to a woman. ideally it will make her laugh. But the fact is. Yes.The Best of TSBMAG. Proximity. The easiest girls to talk to are the ones you're standing closest to. The reason these approaches are the best is because very little thought is going into the interaction. I recommend having a couple canned openers ready for different situations… but I would keep them simple (hey. An opener is just the first thing you say to start an interaction. The best approaches are spontaneous. BAM! You see a woman you want to talk to an immediately initiate a conversation. Don’t hold your breath. But that's just my opinion. there is no perfect opener. 1.COM Day 7 Simple steps for Successfully Approaching and Opening Women Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/19/2008 I think most guys are waiting for some new pick.

The reason spontaneous approaches work the best is because your body language doesn’t have time to get all weird and up tight. You also want to present the image that you could turn and walk away at any time. Body Language.” Once you’re in interview mode she knows you’re hitting on her. On the other hand. The longer you wait the more awkward it's going to be.Once you’ve approached and opened girls keep a really fun vibe. Stay Fun. I see too many guys open a girl with a funny line… then immediately go into “interview mode. This will put you in the right frame of mind.open them immediately. 5. and is probably bored. You want to make sure your body language conveys the image that this interaction carries no excess value to you. That is the beauty of the three second rule.If you open a girl and the whole time you’re talking to her she’s fumbling with her cell phone and avoiding eye contact… don’t waste your time. I hope that these tips help next time you’re out. Now they’re opened. Because the approach was spontaneous you will be sending off really natural body language. The best approaches feel spontaneous. Bobby 291 . As you walk into a venue scan the room for the best possible spot. if you get a tad resistance.Social Superstar them. and you’re in the proximity to a couple girls you want to talk to. Even if you just say “you girls look like you’re ready for a fun night” give them cheers with your glass and then go back to talking to your friend. don't prematurely eject. Open as many people around you as quickly as you can. You’re better off staying playful for awhile. There are entire books on approaching but sometimes it's the simplest advice that is most practical and easy to implement. (And build social value) 3. You have to differentiate between a girl who visibly giving you signals of disinterest… and the girls that just take a little more work. Remember not all girls are super outgoing… some girls need a little prying before they open up. If you’ve entered a bar. Spontaneous. Know when to eject and when not to. You don’t want to be the guy doing laps all night with the hungry look on his face. 2. 4.

. the other night I was talking to a girl at a bar.COM Day 8 Improving Your Conversation Skills Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/20/2008 The goal of a conversation is to connect with the other person on some level. You need to get her to invest some interest in talking to you. The standard question that most guys would have asked next was “how do you like the city?” Instead I said. For instance. I guided her along. “So. 292 . When that thread died down it was easy to transition into another interesting topic.The Best of TSBMAG.” “So you imagined yourself in a power suit… doing lunches with the Gordon Gekko types. swinging your briefcase on your way to your job in advertising…” At this point she stopped me and said… “Ha-ha. you’re here because as a child you had bright lights big city dreams… you imagined yourself strolling down Fifth Ave. I’m a finance geek..” “So tell me what your first week in the city was really like” I asked her. How do you get a girl to invest some interest in the conversation? One of the easiest ways to elicit a response is to make assumptions about her and funny guesses. talking about how Intel is down a point?” From there the conversation flowed naturally because I avoided interview mode. Here she brought up the emotions she felt of excitement mixed with fear. After you’ve approached a woman and have broken the ice with an opening line… you need to hook her into the conversation. and I asked her if she lived in the city. actually I imagined it was a job on Wall St. She told me she just moved here from Iowa.. Using the material she gave me “the mix of excitement and fear” I was able to transition into another thread.

The key to being a good conversationalist is to keep your ears open for hooks. do tell!” See how the conversation is naturally flowing from one thread to another? After she spoke a bit about her adventure in France I told her about my first time in Brazil.. The biggest mistakes guys make is turning the conversation into an interview… take the conversation above and see how easily it could have headed into interview mode: • • • • • me: Do you live in the city? her: I just moved here from Iowa me: Oh yea. A hook is something she says that you can use to extend the conversation. and explained the emotion I felt of “being lost on this entirely different continent.. arriving in NY. and how it almost brings you back your childhood when things were still new… and you had that desire to explore..” We were able to smoothly transition from “Do you live in the City?” to having a detailed conversation about our most adventurous vacations. (Leaving Iowa... so what do you do? her: I’m a stock broker me: where do you usually hangout? 293 .Social Superstar “Well aren’t the most satisfying times in life the times you feel that adrenaline? It's like when you think of your most memorable vacation… it probably wasn’t a vacation you sat in a beach chair sipping Pina Coladas.. her first month here) Each time she gives you a hook you should relate it back to her establishing a connection. out of money” “Oh. If you’re listening to her you’ll notice a new hook every time she opens her mouth.. When she told me she just moved here from Iowa a month ago she gave me three hooks to work off of.. It was probably one where you challenged yourself a bit…” “Haha.. that sounds like a good story. yes… being stuck in France not speaking a word of the language.

What do you do for fun? In the example above you’re wasting valuable hooks by trying to fill the air with pointless banter about yourself. and alone for two days wondering around Paris. So what does one do when they know no one will find out? • See how I acknowledged the emotion that she must have been feeling. I was really listening to her. This is actually a technique I learned from Richard La Ruina’s book The Natural Art of Seduction where he talks about taking things deeper. • • me: tell me about your most adventurous vacation. I have a friend who went there on vacation last year. Here is an example from my conversation of how I took things deeper.The Best of TSBMAG. That I was able to empathize and understand her. didn’t speak the language.COM See how easily the conversation could have turned into a high pressured interview if I hadn’t used what she gave me and related it back to her. That I was genuinely curious to know what one does when they know no one is watching. 294 . • • • • • me: Do you live in the city? her: I just moved here from Iowa me: Really. You also want to stay away from “try hard” relating.. Who cares that your friend went there on vacation? The proper way to handle a hook is to relate it back to her. 3. I dabbled with stocks online a little. me: Oh yea. her: It was this time in France when I was dead broke. What do you do? her: I’m a stockbroker. me: So you must have felt both the thrill and fear of complete anonymity. This simple acknowledgement let her know that: 1. 2. This is where everything she says you try to find away to immediately relate to it.

If you get in this habit you will naturally become a better conversationalist. family. 295 . Many of us have old habits that we’re going to have to break. She knows that you’re not superficially trying to relate… This is a conversational strategy you should take on no matter who you are talking to. Practice picking out the hooks these people are giving you.Social Superstar Once you’ve acknowledged what she has given you it is alright to relate the story to yourself. and coworkers. Because now she knows that you’re on the same playing field. and then practice acknowledging the hooks. Instead of waiting for attractive girls to practice this new conversational strategy I would suggest practicing it with your friends. The easiest way to break an old habit is to consistently implement a new one.

The Best of TSBMAG. One of my rules has always been that it’s all right to put a woman on a pedestal so long as it’s made clear that you’re on the throne. physical appearance. My answer is…it depends on your conveyed status. which is even higher. Daytime Drills One of the biggest problems men have with building comfort with women is that they put too much emphasis on the moment of truth. Until you reach that level of game. Eventually though as you get more comfortable with your inner game and alpha role. sure you can compliment a woman upon first meeting her. The more comfortable you get with your game. however. Picture yourself as 296 . treating a woman like a queen is not a sign of weakness as long as it’s crystal clear that you’re the king. This is just a sampler of techniques you can use to build comfort with women and isn’t meant to be an exhaustive list by any means. it’s always better to start in the beginning with a little more indirect game and use playful negging and teasing to bring down your target’s status in relation to your status. social proofing and/or manner of speech are strong enough to convey higher value from the moment you walk in the door or open your mouth. If your body language. you will probably want to lean more toward indirect game and playful teasing and insults. If there’s any possible doubt as to your status versus her status. which is the moment of interaction at the bar or club. the easier it will get to convey that you’re an alpha male and a prize with hardly any effort. I hope you guys enjoy it and find it helpful. Or to put it another way.COM Day 9 How to Build Comfort with a Girl Written by T Originally Published: 06/23/2008 Bobby Rio asked me to shed some light on building comfort with women. Two things I hear guys ask about when it comes to building comfort with women are (1) whether to go indirect versus direct with the game and (2) whether to compliment or playfully insult the woman. however. you want to get skilled at knowing how and when to use compliments and direct game as well as using negs and indirect game.

Start a conversation every day with a different attractive woman. You’d never do that. The whole goal is to get comfortable talking to women you don’t know. The point is to get comfortable starting conversations with women and to get comfortable with the occasional rejection. Ask a woman for her opinion on a cologne or article of clothing you’re considering buying when you’re shopping at the department store. A cramped subway car is an opportunity. If you’re stuck on a long post office line behind an attractive woman. Imagine how nervous you’d be. In fact. you don’t have to get a number or pick a woman up. Make small talk with the Starbucks barista when waiting for your coffee. You’d run drills. Imagine how off your game would be. Aim for 30 seconds. You’d do visualization exercises. When you do these daily conversations in the beginning you’re just aiming to get used to the banter and to reduce the anxiety you get from having conversations with women. It’s not enough to make a note on what doesn’t work for the sake of avoiding repeating the mistake. With these drills. and forget to ever repeat that joke or story again. take mental notes on what works and what doesn’t. say a basketball player. go for five minutes. Chat with a cute bank teller while she’s handling business for you. And by the time you hit the big game you’d feel a lot less pressure on yourself because you mentally prepared yourself for this moment. A woman sitting next to you on a bus reading a book you’ve already read is an opportunity. The same applies for building comfort with women: practice when it doesn’t count and when no one is watching and you’ll be way more confident and perform much better during game time. so you’ll experience less rejection and more responsiveness than you would in a nightspot.Social Superstar an athlete. it’s even more important to make notes on what does work so that you can repeat it and fine-tune it. When you do this. Then go for a minute. You’d take shot after shot after shot in your spare time. You’d practice by yourself for hours when nothing is on the line and not a lot of people are watching. that’s an opportunity for conversation. For some reason a lot of guys make a joke or tell a story that works brilliantly in a conversation. the more you get rejected. but you never practice or touch a basketball except during big games in front of a large amount of people. You achieve that. Don’t fall into that trap. Women’s defenses tend to be down more in these casual daytime situations than they are in a bar or nightclub where they are more guarded due to being hit on incessantly. the more you realize that it won’t kill you and that 297 . pat themselves on the back for it.

Avoid it at all costs. I’ll give an example of this. A friend of mine. Beethoven. you can joke about what a 95 lb. Apologizing for who you are and what you believe however is a no-no. Don’t use self-deprecating humor. recently approached two women at a bar. They are so afraid of not getting her approval that they almost beg for it. the anxiety kicks in and they start getting flustered easily. First. There are plenty of other articles out there about that. Then you’ll want to get used to observing and interpreting body language. because both those tendencies are obstacles to building comfort. I’m going to focus on how to build comfort with a woman once you’re already in conversation with her. But outside of that exception. Once you get used to doing your daily daytime drills and getting comfortable starting and maintaining conversations with women. The conversation started out well 298 . Then you need to focus on using your body language to convey the alpha male impression you want to convey. Of course use your discretion. Apologizing for your actions is the right thing to do under some circumstances. then you should apologize. Then they start over apologizing.The Best of TSBMAG. weakling you are. if you step on her foot or spill a drink on her. Don’t do it. never sound desperate to please. but never at your own expense. And that alone is important. Nightlife Comfort Since this article is supposed to be about building comfort. I’m not going to focus on openers and how to start conversations with women. avoid self-deprecation or anything that lowers your status. When many guys come across a pretty woman. Don’t apologize. be playful. Second. It works great because (a) it’s genuinely funny when done right and (b) it points out one of your strengths yet comes off less obnoxious and approval-seeking than outright bragging. Make her laugh. Stick to your guns. There is one exception to the self-deprecating humor rule: you can use selfdeprecating humor if it’s blatantly insincere and actually points out one of your strengths: for example. if you have an athletic. and tease her like she’s your little sister. muscular physique. Be cocky. don’t apologize for who you are and don’t be afraid to offend. A woman busts their balls a little bit and they backtrack or apologize immediately.COM it’s not the end of the world. you’ll see your bar or nightclub game improve dramatically.

Once you start winning a woman over and she is warming up to you.Social Superstar enough. which would have made her uncomfortable. they will feel uncomfortable around you. He just looked her up and down and said “Whatever. chosen careers and religious beliefs. put her in a position of dominance. even if it’s within the bar or club. instead of making the situation better. Women do not respect a man they can easily dominate or make uncomfortable. which would make her lose respect for him. and if they do not respect you. and even worse. But Beethoven stuck to his guns. If she is passionate about fashion and works in the field. often does more harm than good Fourth. She said “That’s not very nice” and seemed disgusted. it would have just highlighted the awkwardness. don’t mock religion. move around from place to place. Good rule of thumb is to be careful about negging about political stances. If he apologized. but at some point one of the girls asked Beethoven what he and his friends were discussing earlier. You should keep playful tone and never stop teasing totally. And then it goes from being cute and charming to just smug. By never sounding desperate to please and never apologizing for who you are. If she’s heavily into church. didn’t backtrack and didn’t apologize. she is going to want to start getting to know you and building rapport with you. If she’s passionate about politics and is involved in certain causes. If you just keep negging and teasing at the same level you were when you first started building comfort with her. don’t tease or playfully insult her favorite cause or ideology. as these tend to represent a person’s core values and insulting these. you risk coming off as a real obnoxious prick. but you do want to dial it down as you build more and more rapport with the girl. Third. he ended up hooking up with her. Sometimes when guys get really good at the negging and teasing and see the initial results it gets them. ever want to tease a girl about a topic related to her core values. know when to stop negging and teasing so much. they go overboard and do it for too long.” His target’s jaw dropped and she was absolutely mortified. don’t mock her chosen field as frivolous or stupid. For some reason. changing locations gives the psychological 299 . Not only did he turn that potential negative into a positive. even playfully. you earn their respect and set the foundation for building more comfort. And you never. Beethoven responded “We were just discussing how many fat girls there are here tonight. annoying and dickish. why does it bother you? It’s not like you have anything to worry about looking the way you do” and just kept going with the conversation.

make sure to touch her whenever you can. A conversation will get stale quickly and turn into the foundation for a friend zone relationship if you never touch her during the conversation. and suddenly the attraction mood is dead and you’re on the road to becoming her emotional tampon as she drones on and on about how much feelings she has for him. but it’s not that hard. Then go to another part of the bar. I’m not going to go into the specifics of playful touching here. may start venting and getting worked up and then start transferring her issues with her ex 300 . it can end up being a light. really. For example. lead her to a spot at the bar and order drinks.COM impression that you are spending more time together and bonding more. while it’s cool to playfully bring up sex. you’ve just guaranteed yourself a place in the friend zone. Getting the balance of touching just right so that you don’t come off either too timid or too aggressive takes some trial and error. Light. Fifth. which are very important when building comfort. if within a bar. With ex-es. she may have a lot of unresolved anger toward him. don’t overdo it. but it works. take her to the dance floor later. In the pickup community they call it “Kino. As with anything. 10 minutes later take her to some couches to sit down.The Best of TSBMAG. If you know how to dance. But there’s also the risk that she may end up talking about him at length and getting nostalgic about him and talking about how much she still loves him. Moving around from venue to venue also helps build comfort. Or on the flip side. do not dwell too deeply into conversation about ex's (hers or yours) and specific approaches toward sex. You don’t want to come off as hyperactive and spastic and moving around every 30 seconds. These things can backfire too easily if you don’t know what you’re doing. playful touching conveys sexual interest and builds attraction and sexual tension. but you can find tons of Kino-related articles by Bobby and Mike right here on the TSB Magazine I’m sure. If you build comfort without building attraction at the same time.” but it’s something my friend and I always made sure to do before we ever knew what it was called. Sixth. Take her to another end of the bar and introduce her to some your friends. It’s an illusion. the more time she feels like she’s spent with you and the more comfortable she feels. such as going from one bar to a second bar to lounge to a diner…bouncing around like that gives the psychological impression to a girl that she’s just spent three or four mini-dates with you and she’ll feel more comfort with you than if you spent that exact same amount of time talking to her rooted to one spot. The more locations a woman associates with you. harmless conversation.

and I have to get to know him very well first. even if she gets insanely attracted and comfortable with you later in that same conversation. With women. you’ll get a totally different answer than you would if you asked her that same question later on when you have her on an emotional high. You’ll start believing you have no shot of building much comfort anytime soon. I made this mistake with a woman once. if you never asked about sex at all things could have happened much more spontaneously. With men. If a woman hasn’t built much attraction and comfort with you yet and you ask her what her attitude is about how soon is too soon to have sex. women’s attitudes change wildly with their emotional states. And on her end. By asking her such a specific sexual questions too early before she’s built comfort and rapport with you.” Now that you’ve made her explicitly give a sexual timetable.Social Superstar specifically and men in general toward the next closest male target. who in this case would be you. she’ll be very cognizant about coming off like a slut to a guy she barely knows and may say something like “I don’t have sex with a guy until three or four months of dating. here’s an example of how that can backfire. Instead I spent the night fielding angry questions about why guys cheat. Needless to say. Hope it helps some of you out there. to change their minds you must change their emotions. why guys hurt women…I ended up being her convenient target for everything she hated about men. And regarding bringing up specific approaches toward sex. this isn’t an exhaustive list when it comes to building comfort. she’s going to feel obligated to stick to her original conservative statement for fear of looking like a hypocrite or liar. As I mentioned before. Meanwhile. Unlike men. now that she’s verbally committed to that. it’s going to mentally psyche you out and make you behave less aggressively in your comfort building. thinking that making her talk about her shitty ex would be a great way to sell myself as a positive alternative. why guys fear commitment. it wasn’t a great comfort-building conversation. 301 . to change their minds you must change their logic. but I think it’s a pretty good foundation.

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Day 10 Being Funnier – Make it fun!
Written by Barry Kirkey Originally Published: 06/24/2008

Every woman likes a positive man, and often, positivity takes the form of a good sense of humor. The problem with giving anyone advice about how to become funnier, is that humor is universally subjective. Meaning, every culture, sub-culture or individual decides what is funny on their own. Yeah there are exceptions, people can be told by popular media what they think is funny, but you’re not one of those people because you’re reading this article. Here are some things you can do to become funnier, in chronological order: First, find out what you like. A sense of humor is as unique as your own DNA (simile). They are usually a complex combination of joke types, body language, interest in shows/movies, and so forth. This step should normally be a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised at how so many people dislike comedy. Once you find out what you like, expose yourself to it. Watch those shows and movies that you love. Watch them alone or with friends and family. Learn how to laugh out loud when you watch them, even if you’re by yourself. I would caution you, however, not to “force it down,” meaning if you’re not in the mood to watch a comedy show (sitcoms, late night, etc.) then don’t watch it. If you have the problem of never being in the mood then you need to find out why this is the case. Note: If you’re never in the mood to laugh, you may have other issues that are keeping you down. I suggest you speak to a psychologist, doctor or other professional that can determine why your mood is always down. You might be surprised to learn about what prevents you from doing what you love. This can be something as serious as depression or anxiety. However, it can also mean that you’re still, subconsciously, dealing with unresolved matters in your life (such as, a fight with your dad 6 months ago and you haven’t talked to him since). After enough exposure, you’re ready to take it to the field. Try to avoid copying other jokes directly – those Borat impressions are no longer
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funny, so don’t do them. Unless you’re a naturally funny guy – then you can get away with it, but that’s a whole different article. If you must copy, use a variation of what you’ve learned instead. For example, if you want to do a Seinfeld joke, don’t just start quoting the show. Do your worst and most annoying Seinfeld voice and exaggerate a Seinfeld-type joke as much as you can. Make it ridiculous and unexpected. While all this is going, laugh at your own jokes. Laugh as much as you can and absorb the criticism of others by laughing even more. Here’s why: Laughing is infectious. The more you laugh, the more others around you are likely to laugh as well. Not only that, but let’s consider the whole theory of conditioning by association. If you’re consistently around the same people, doing jokes often, and laughing often, people will associate you with laughter. When this happens, you’ve won the game – you’re known as “the funny guy.” “But Mr. fuckface (me)! How do I use this to get girls!?” Just by statistics, most people end up in quality relationships through other people that you already know (i.e., in the office, friend of a friend or family member). So you get the immediate benefit of being “the funny” guy in your own social circle that way. “But Mr. faggittface (me)! What about girls you don’t know?!” Okay, that’s definitely more difficult, but not impossible. With cold approaches, first impressions are the only thing you have, so make it count. Start off with the best jokes you have, make sure you laugh and you smile. If she looks down on you, make a friendly insult, “wow – someone dropped their funny basket in the toilet today!” and walk on to the next person. If you end up forced into a situation with someone who doesn’t respect your humor then this is particularly challenging, because you can potentially make an enemy without knowing it. Similar to what happened with Darth Vador, it’s difficult to turn someone from being your enemy to your friend, but not impossible. I won’t go into this situation now, because that is a discussion for those who are already polished and comfortable with their own sense of humor… Dun dun dun! Anal.
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Day 11 Mastering the Art of Push-Pull and Cocky-Funny
Written by The Asian Rake Originally Published: 06/25/2008

Do You Want Faster and More Powerful Seductions? How the 80/20 Principle applies to Push-Pull and Cocky-Funny? We’ve all heard about the 80/20 principle first developed by Vilfredo Pareto in the context of the distribution of income and wealth. My experience and observations have shown that the 80/20 rule applies just as well to push-pull and cocky-funny. After closely observing naturals who are masters at crazily rapid escalations and seductions, and after a lot of discussions with PUAs who have really tight game, I’ve discovered an important enhancement to the simplistic push-pull and cocky-funny concepts. This small bit of finetuning can shave a lot of time off your seductions and create much stronger, closer emotional connections. Here’s my thesis statement (yes, I’m an academic, lol): If you want to seduce a woman faster and have her more powerfully attracted to you, the optimal mix for a man who already has his fundamentals down (his body language, tonality, and basic inner game) and is interacting with a confident and attractive woman is 80% pull, 20% push. I’m not going to be too strict about the numbers. But more accurately, the optimal combination depends on how good the man’s fundamentals are and how confident the woman is. It’s a continuum with the upper end of the continuum being 80-20 pull-push. My experience has also been that pull-push is best mixed with humor. Plus, the pull and the push are opposite manifestations of cockiness. With push, you are cocky enough to think that you are too good for the girl, so you push her away. With pull, you are cocky enough to think that you are irresistible to her and to women in general, and you want her, so you pull her in. Although there is plenty to say about this combination of push-pull and cocky-funny, I’ll leave that to another article. My focus here is on the
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80/20 principle applied to the push-pull dynamic. I’ll assume here that it’s obvious that push-pull is closely connected to cocky-funny. For the classic book on push-pull, see Swingcat’s ebook, Real World Seduction. For cocky-funny, the best authority is David DeAngelo. Check out his ebook, Double Your Dating, and his DVD series, Cocky Comedy. I assume at least familiarity with push-pull and cocky-funny as described in these resources. Christian Hudson and Nick Sparks over at The Social Man are about to release a product that incorporates all the concepts in Swingcat and David D.’s books and then takes it all to another level. Watch at their site for the release. We’re good friends, so I’m a little biased, but you can go over there and check it out for yourself: What I say here is NOT for absolute newbie's, who don’t yet have their fundamentals down (body language, tonality, and basic inner game). If you still don’t know what good BL&T looks, sounds, and feels like, stop reading this and figure that out first. My point here applies to elite game. It’s for guys who want to know what it’s like to live in the top 10%, or higher, of men in this world. That’s not to say this is advanced. It’s just not for beginners. A quickie definition of push-pull straight from the pen of Swingcat: “Push-Pull is whenever you emotionally push a woman away from you and, then, emotionally pull her back in. Each Push creates an emotional space for each Pull.” We’ll be filling this out as we go along. Now let’s unpack the thesis statement. While you can succeed using almost any combination of push and pull (e.g., 80% push-20% pull, 50% push-50% pull), the combination that will generate the fastest seductions and most powerful connections is 80-20 pull-push or in other words, 80% pull-20% push. This is true only if the following also hold: a. The man has good fundamentals (good body language, tonality, tight inner game and is hence non-needy, etc.). This also applies if he is physically attractive or is perceived by the woman to have high social value. b. The woman is unusually attractive in the man’s eyes, and she is confident about her value and attractiveness. This relates to Believability. She needs to be able to be confident enough in her self-worth to accept your advances.
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If both those elements are in place, then the fastest and most powerful route to sex is a mix of 80% pull-20% push. [CAVEAT: If the man only has average fundamentals and the woman is only of average confidence in her own attractiveness and value, then the optimal mix is further down the continuum and closer to 50-50 pushpull. This is because pulling a woman closer to you emotionally is only effective when you already have a basic level of attraction from the woman. Of course, we all know that this kind of attraction is largely independent of one’s physical appearance. Over 90% of this kind of attraction is attributable to body language and tonality alone. That’s why I call these the fundamentals. Your attitude and outlook are also crucial to pulling off the right BL&T, so I include inner game as a factor for the sake of completeness.] Pushing a woman away is effective when a woman looks at you and doesn’t expect you to be cocky. It throws her off and is hence funny. It’s like when a precocious child talks like an adult, using mature and sophisticated vocabulary, sentence structure, etc. It’s unexpected and incongruent with the kid’s image, and hence, kind of funny, and if done right, it’s admirable. Now imagine a 50 year old, sophisticated-looking man talking the same way. It’s not funny anymore. It’s just normal and expected. Similarly, when a below average looking guy uses a lot of push cockyfunny, talking as if he’s too good for her and using humorous sarcasm, it’s attractive because the woman begins to wonder, “How can this guy be so cocky? He must have something going for him that I can’t see yet. I’m interested.” And because it’s done in a comedic way, she’s not offended, but rather, intrigued. Now if a guy who has his fundamentals down (good BL&T), a goodlooking guy, or a guy perceived to have high value starts to push her away emotionally, she’s not intrigued. Why? Because it’s obvious why this guy is so cocky. He’s good-looking, high-value, or has an attractive personality. It’s not funny anymore because it’s expected and congruent with his image. He just comes across cocky. For a guy like this to use cocky-funny, he has to really emphasize the humor and really cut down on the cocky part.
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Most people overlook the fact that David D. himself acknowledged this in one of his newsletters: "If you’re a pretty good looking guy, you might turn down the cocky, and turn up the funny. Women perceive good-looking guys who act cocky as MAJOR PLAYERS, and too much cocky too soon can backfire on you.” More accurately, this isn’t just true for guys who are good-looking. If your fundamentals are strong, or you’re perceived as high-value, then it applies just as well to you. It’s the push dynamic that makes these high-value or good-looking guys come across as too unattainable. For guys like this, it’s best to use the pull dynamic more often and save the push dynamic for that 20% of dramatic contrast. And obviously, when a guy with good fundamentals, attractive appearance, or high social value is perceived as a “major player,” it is very bad for his Believability. You can do it the opposite way, of course. You can do mainly push and just a little pull, like 80% push and 20% pull. Or you can be very cocky and only a little funny. Sure, you can get success that way, too. But for the most part, if your fundamentals are already strong, then: 1) You can get much faster seductions by pulling her in more often than you can by pushing her away. 2) You can get the girl to feel a deeper emotional bond with you by pulling more often than pushing. Here’s why: 1. If your fundamentals are good, then you will be a relatively DOMINANT, powerful, and confident man. Hence, girls (and most people in general) will naturally feel like following your lead. So when you tell a girl to sit down, she will feel a strong social and emotional pull to sit down. When you’re emotionally pulling a girl in by telling her to kiss you, she will have to work extra hard to resist. Most girls like a strong, dominant, powerful, confident guy, and many girls have the fantasy of “being taken” by such a man. Any resistance they give to such a man is just token.

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Thus, if you already have good fundamentals (BL&T and basic inner game), and you want to shave massive amounts of time off your seductions, you’re better off pulling the girl in more frequently than pushing her away because the chances are good she will give in more often than not. Ah, but Asian Rake, when you push a girl away, doesn’t she want to pull you in? Isn’t that the whole point of pushing her away? So you can get her to chase you? Yes, to a certain extent, this is true. That’s why you SHOULD STILL PUSH. That’s the all-important 20%. In fact, by pulling most of the time, when you do finally push her away, it’ll feel that much more powerful to her. If you’re a dominant guy, girls will feel pressure to follow your orders, and unless she’s very dominant herself, chances are good that she will NOT pull you in return every time you push her away. Chances are good that if you are a dominant man, when you push her further away, she will follow your lead and remain further away. Assuming the pushes and pulls are of about equal emotional intensity (that’s one variable I’m leaving out here), if you PULL more often than not, she might resist you at first, but then because you’re dominant, she’ll follow your lead and move closer to you emotionally and physically. If you PUSH more often than not, she might resist you at first, but then because you’re a dominant guy, she’ll follow your lead and move further away from you emotionally and physically. Sure you can generate attraction with most combinations of push-pull. But what’s faster to sex? When she’s emotionally and physically closer to you, or when she’s emotionally and physically farther from you? It should be obvious. This is how the best naturals I’ve seen get bathroom lays in less than 15 minutes. It’s pull-pull-pull-pull-PUSH-pull-pull-pull-PUSH-pull-pull-pull to the bathroom. 2. By pulling more often than pushing, you can also create the deep emotional connections much faster.
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you are really adventurous. make fun of her. A far more efficient way to develop emotional connections is to pull her in emotionally. Btw. be indifferent towards her. is a great example of a pull. and generally bust her balls as much as possible. There are others. helpfully lays it all out in his Double Your Dating: I’m going to play hard to get. “Wow. this is also a key technique for creating the kind of emotional connections that will get girls to fall in love with you FAST. If your Believability game is good then every qualification is actually a pull. she’ll want to open herself up and continue connecting with you. I’m going to blow her off and make her prove to me that she wants me… so I can reject her again. PUSH COCKY-FUNNY The prime proponent of this is David D. Now let’s add the COCKY-FUNNY into the mix. this guy really. What exactly do I mean by Push Cocky-Funny vs. truly. When you stack enough of these. For instance. 309 . She’ll be saying to herself. David D. I like that. probably the best way to illustrate what I mean is through examples.” And of course. how can she possibly feel an emotional connection? This should be obvious. of course. so I’m going to really keep the heat on… and when she starts to show any interest at all on the outside. but this is one of the easiest to do.” said in response to her little adventure story.Social Superstar If you’re continually pushing her away emotionally. Let’s first talk about the internal mindset behind Push Cocky-Funny. I know that she loves a guy that is so sarcastic that it makes her nervous. however. she’ll feel like you really appreciate her for her unique qualities. Pull Cocky-Funny? Once again. One very effective kind of pull technique is in conjunction with screening and qualifying. sincerely likes me for my special qualities. “Wow. like sharing secrets and using childhood regression.

I’ll turn to her and say in a completely serious voice.The Best of TSBMAG. (Pull #2) HB (breaking out laughing): Where are you from? Me: From? It doesn’t matter. It should be a crime for you to walk in public. David D. I say after lowering my hands) I’m in love with you… Give me your number. you’ll be pushing her away a lot more than you’ll be pulling her in. This took place near the coat check of a huge nightclub. “What are you doing at a bar for god sakes? Can’t you find a nice normal guy? Or are you desperate?” All with a completely straight face. so I’ll give you one of my own examples. “Will you PLEASE stop touching me?” And then look them right in the eye. long-haired beauty walks by. (Pull #1) HB (shocked): Huh? Are you crazy? Why? Me (with an incredulous look on my face): Why? I mean. tonality. but you’re better off reading his eBook or watching his DVD series Cocky Comedy.’s materials. I never thought I’d be plugging David D. LOL. which is just about the only place in the club where you can talk without speaking right into her ear. Wow. I learned from a natural friend that this sort of thing is best done when you’re a bit over the top or dramatically exaggerated in what you say and in your facial expressions. which is what I call.” they’re thinking this kind of cocky-funny. I want your number. just look at you.” PULL COCKY-FUNNY This is my default style of cocky-funny.COM You notice that with this mindset. Me: OMG! (Then. (Pull #3) HB (laughing): No way. First tell me where you’re from. You’re driving me crazy. follows this up with some now classic examples: I do crazy things. and I jump in front of her with my hands slightly extended in front of my chest in a “stopping” motion with my palms out. 310 . with a sigh and a love-sick puppy dog look. A super cute. and body language. I could go on forever. When most guys think “cocky-funny. “Push Cocky-Funny. Or say. like if I’m standing next to a girl at a bar. as if he needs to sell any more.

… guess. You can have the dog. My hands are all cold and sweaty. club bathroom sex. I texted her about an hour later.Social Superstar Me: Okay. and she texted back. We talked a little bit more. I’ll be so sad… I’m going to go home and cry now (and then I slumped my shoulders as if completely sad and depressed). I take her hand in mine). I say in a quieter tone. “enlightened seduction. Me (perking up and letting out a sly smile): Okay. asking what I was doing tomorrow… But that’s for another LR. check the mASF archives or google. If you haven’t read any of his materials yet. (Push #1) HB laughed. Me (stepping out in front of her again and knowing that she’s just teasing and wants me to chase her): No. feel. Another great example comes from Zan.) You know. (Pull #4) HB (laughing): You’re not nervous. Among the community oldtimers. Here. (Pull #5) HB laughed. see the LR that features my first encounter with NaturalMD:. wait. Notice the push-pull ratio here. HB: Um. That was 5 pulls to 1 push. and now you’re calling me a liar? That’s it. There are many other tales to recount about naturals such as him. China? Me: Pretty close… (Taking a step closer to her so that we’re inches apart. some of which you can find elsewhere on my site and some of which I might write about in the future. You’ll have to check back for those. You can’t go. (Then. HB said (with a smile): “Okay. The one push came after 4 pulls.” 311 . This sort of Pull Cocky-Funny can get you super fast make outs and. I don’t even think that push was necessary. bye. and then I let her go back to her friends. Zan is probably the best representative of this kind of cockyfunny. give me your number. For an example of a fast make out. you’re making me really nervous. as my natural friends have shown. Me (throwing off her hand and looking shocked): Are you calling me a liar? I’ve just confessed my deep dark love for you. We’re getting a divorce… But I’m keeping the DVDs. In fact.” and started walking off. HB (laughs): Okay. I said nothing and continued looking fake-mad.

so you’re still seeing Norman? HER: Uh… his name’s not Norman. sweetie. ever worry about a woman’s resistance to me. HER: No thanks. Pull Cocky-Funny. But if you have good fundamentals (body language. This is the ideal kind of frame to be operating from when doing Pull Cocky-Funny. do you? ZAN: Of course not! Wouldn’t be the same if I did. Did you miss me? HER: Hardly. I have two bottles of champagne at home. ZAN: I want to see you. her boyfriend objections (or whatever) mean nothing to me. around 80%-20% is ideal. ZAN: Oh hey. ZAN: (smile. Push Cocky-Funny vs. If she says she is not interested and leaves. ZAN: Oh. would it? HER (laughing) No. As if she had never resisted me in the first place. but this conversation of his has stuck in my mind for a while now: ZAN: Come out with me for a drink tonight. I never. ZAN: (big smile) Hello. And keep it all funny. or you’re good-looking. and basic inner game). In other words. and pick up right where I left off. Both can work. smile and wink. wink) Really? That’s very interesting. tonality. My boyfriend wouldn’t like it. But if I ever see her again. Tell me your number and I’ll remember it. So her objections don’t even register with him. and you are interacting with a confident and attractive woman. no problem. HER: No! I told you last time I have a boyfriend. I will pick you up at 7. I understand… let’s make it 8 then. ZAN: One to drink and one to pour all over your body… HER: You never give up. HER: I can’t. then you can get faster seductions and make deeper connections by doing more Pull than Push. 312 .The Best of TSBMAG. I suppose not… I find this whole exchange completely charming and hilarious. Just about everything he says is a pull. He’s cocky because he believes that she’d be crazy to turn him down. So there you have it. I immediately go up to her. or you have high perceived social value.COM There are so many possibilities to choose from. Zan pulls her in about seven times.

bowing their heads. The first part of this lesson I want to make you aware of the different ways you are conveying low status. People try to blend in with the crowd by slumping their shoulders. Less confident people tend to look down a lot. Hopefully by being consciously aware of these mistakes you can catch yourself in the act. other people with run their hand through their hair. Fiddling with Things.Social Superstar Day 12 Body Language 101 Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published:06/26/2008 The first thing you need to accept about your body language is that right now you’re probably completely unaware of the mistakes that you are making. Slouching over is a way of keeping a low profile. Doing any of these things immediately screams that you are not comfortable in your present situation. others will juggle the loose change in their pocket. It portrays an image that you are socially awkward and unable to properly socialize. Touching Your Face. it took watching myself on video a few times to really appreciate how many mistakes I was actually making. Body Language mistakes 1. Slouching Over. Their insecurity eats away at them and they feel forced to constantly be moving their hands. They are afraid that if they catch eye contact with someone they will be forced to talk or smile or do something else beyond their comfort zone. 2. Subconsciously people slouch because they are timid and don’t want attention on them. Avoiding Eye Contact. For me. They do this because it is a way of avoiding making a connection with someone. and quickly correct them. Some people will rub their chin or neck. 3. but you’re missing out on opportunities to connect with other human beings. By avoiding eye contact with people not only are you giving off a low status vibe. and taking up as little space as possible. By taking the time to first break any of these bad habits you may have. 313 . When people feel insecure or nervous they start to have trouble sitting still. you will be making it possible to accept the new habits I will talk about later.

but don’t be afraid to get comfortable. Holding Your Face up with Your Hand. Habit 6: You should keep your feet about as far apart as your shoulders. The idea is to take up some space. Leaning Forward to Talk to Someone. This displays the image that you’re too bored or tired to bother holding up your head straight. Tell your friends to point this out to you. If you don’t have a naturally attractive smile than you should practice in front of a mirror. A quick glance around a room can tell you which guys are going to succeed with the women they are talking to. causing her to move toward him. Habit 2: Get in the habit of walking around with your head up and your neck straight. If someone else is talking to you. Create a little game with yourself to remind yourself to pay attention to your posture. Habit 4: Smile often. and which guys will fail. Habit 5: Push your chest out a bit and pull your shoulders back. 314 . Habit 3: Keep your muscles relaxed. A smile displays a positive energy that is infectious. If you’re talking to a group of people switch eye contact up between the different members of the group… but always be holding it with someone.. While doing the talking you should be holding eye contact for the majority of the time. It displays a lack of enthusiasm and energy towards life. as they appear to have nothing to offer. Body Language Habits of the Alpha Male This second part of this lesson is designed to improve your body language and replace the negative habits you may have been displaying. It can also give off the impression that you’re uncomfortable with the way you look and are trying to hide your face. This is another habit you will have to check often to avoid falling back into the old habit of slouching. The successful guys are usually relaxed leaning away from the girl. In the beginning you will need to constantly be checking yourself. The unsuccessful guys are the ones bent over leaning forward. If you think she can’t hear you… talk louder. 5. These are not the kind of people other people want to interact with. hold eye contact about 50% of the time. Don’t slouch and look sloppy.COM 4. This is especially true of your facial muscles.The Best of TSBMAG. Habit 7: Take up space when you sit. When we tend to get nervous we tense up in the jaw.. Habit 1: Make it a practice to hold eye contact with everyone that you meet. Spread yourself out a bit. You need to keep your face free of this stress.

315 . Habit 9: Avoid making sudden hyper gestures. Learn how to speak with a deeper voice. shoulders back. This means your head should be high. how to blink slowly. too fast. chest puffed out a bit. If you’re grabbing a drink off the bar take it at a speed that says “I’m in no hurry. Add more bass to your voice. Learn to speak from down in your chest and stomach. The trick to pulling all these habits together is to use slow calculated gestures. On the subject of body language… voice tone is insanely important. it hurts”. But if you implement these habits over rest of these 31 days you will find that eventually it will become natural to you. you’re going to need to take a few lessons from Barry White. Body language and voice tone habits are not easy to change. and feel like they need to talk because they’re nervous. This is especially true when walking through a bar… you never want to give off the vibe that you’re looking for the cool place to be. It takes time and determination to break a bad habit and replace it with a new one. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. relax. Also. You want to give off the vibe that you know where it is and already are heading there.” Try learning how to turn your head slowly. Every gesture you make should flow naturally at the same speed as your previous gestures. learn how to speak slower… and how to articulate every word better. Habit 10: Use hand gestures when telling a story. do it slowly like it doesn’t embarrass you that she noticed. and become comfortable with the tension that comes from silence. When talking to someone avoid clutching on to your beer or putting your hands in your pocket. neck up. This kind of body language transmits the message: “I’m so comfortable in my own skin. Most guys talk too much. Become comfortable pausing… it creates anticipation. and take big slow steps. Also walk with direction. Most people speak with weak. Don’t do it! Learn to lean back.Social Superstar Habit 8: Walk with confidence and power. If you want to attract beautiful women. squeaky voices that convey the message: “I’m not confident… I have no self esteem”. If you’re giving a girl a once over. While technically it isn’t body language. Try never to appear to be in a hurry or flustered. all the same rules apply to it.

sexually aware alpha male. then all the techniques you’re learning will work TEN times better.COM If you work on using your BODY AND VOICE to communicate that you’re a confident.The Best of TSBMAG. 316 .

tsbmag.com 317 .com/2008/06/28/building-your-social-circleday-13/ Or search for “Building Your Social Circle” on TSBMAG.Social Superstar Day 13 Building your Social Circle http://www.

I’m not out at bars testing out my latest and greatest “teasing” method… nor do I really expect YOU to be. complicated.The Best of TSBMAG.COM Day 14 How to Properly Tease a Woman Written by Brad Howard Originally Published: 06/30/2008 Before I start. and the interactions I’ve have with guys that aren’t having any problems in the “woman” department. hair) Your Body (best inner game changer… EVER!) If you can get these 4 aspects of your “game” down… you’ll CRUSH most men. the whole point of teasing is to create a fun environment where women can loosen up and open up to you. piece of work that I’m trying to make sound more insightful than it probably is… It seems that everyone is doing that nowadays and I think that the message that people are trying to convey is getting lost in the fray. (Note: I DO NOT do this for a living. They are: The Opinion Opener Teasing Your Look (clothes. I don’t view it as a way to “pull” a woman down to your level.) First and foremost. no matter how good looking she is I find that if you’re pulling YOURSELF down to HER level… you’ll find better success. let me just say that this article is NOT going to be some PROFOUND. here are the MOST important “things” that if you get down that will make the most impact in your dating/relationship life… bar none. That being said. Teasing is also a great way to shake someone out of a funk. So… with that aside… let's get to it… let's talk a little about my way of teasing women… and how it sparks sexual tension. This is just a collection of what I KNOW to be true from my personal life. In fact. or get them to see that whatever’s going on it their life really isn’t that bad at all. Here’s what I mean: 318 .

you might hear someone tell you to say. “Setting up TEASE BAIT” Teasing is no fun if only one person is doing it. she’s likely to be playful back. It might work for some. To which you could say something like. Teasing works BEST with women that you already know… or that you’ve just met through a circle of friends (especially if you have a bit of notoriety amongst the group for being a fun guy). but I don’t usually use it. It’s meant to be fun. “You know. that I DON’T condone. Don’t use teasing to “knock” a woman down. A woman’s ego is like a glass house and teasing in this way COULD be like throwing a ROCK into it. “Ah ha! I KNEW you were some type of shoe guru. Here’s the thing about teasing though. If you’re playful. and ask a woman “I need your opinion on something… and be BRUTAL… what do you think of these shoes. For instance. Would I RECOMMEND that you try it if you’re a rookie at the whole “teasing” game? Um… HELL NO! And here’s why. So. She feels uncomfortable now… and the conversation takes a negative tone. Where did you get your special talent (smile)?” And that’s just for opening someone up. I just picked ‘em up and I always seem to screw this up… ha-ha”.Social Superstar I like to use self depreciating humor to set up teasing. 319 . many times. everything is working for you tonight EXCEPT those shoes… where did you get those?” Is there a way to say this so that it works? Absolutely. The WHOLE POINT of teasing is to make the woman FEEL GOOD by being around you. if you come from a place of strength. I’ll throw out some self-depreciating humor as BAIT to get the ball rolling. For instance.

COM (The KEY to self-depreciating humor is that although you’re a strong. So you say: “Yeah. wink) This also works well if you want to take it to a sexual level. but they are just too scared to tell anyone about them. I get it… Look. if you get on one knee and smile really pretty… I MIGHT even say yes…” Her: “I AM NOT!” You: “It’s okay. if you wanna ask me out. just say so. Again. (smile) Her: “Whatever. You don’t have to keep beating around the bush. confident guy… you don’t take yourself so seriously) So maybe I’ll tell a fun story that people can laugh at (like the time I locked myself out of my hotel room NAKED and had to walk down to the desk NAKED to get another key) and then ACCUSE people of having similar stories.The Best of TSBMAG. POWERFUL STUFF here. Who knows. what you’re up to…You may continue… (smile. You: “Whoa. I use this ALL the time. This works REALLY well. yeah. Her: “(maybe changing subject)” You: (laughing) “You can change the subject if you want. all you’re doing is ACCUSING the other person of trying to do something that YOU want to happen. yeah I know… ha-ha). Basically. really… it won’t make you a lesser person (smile). Let’s say that you want to ask a person out on a date (bland. “The Accusation Tease” This one is FUN. Nelly… I know you’re just trying to get me drunk so you can take me home and do dirty things to me. but just remember that I KNOW (point to head). On closer look. the reason this works is because people (women) can see how SECURE you are with yourself because MOST men would NEVER tell a story in which THEY were the one being made fun of. I am not” 320 .

Social Superstar You: “Man. Here’s a hint. Using the accusation tease is a SURE way to get her to give you a “love tap”… or punch on the arm… or a light shove. You: (Smiling) “Are you going to get in a better mood… huh… are you? Her: “Stop it!” 321 . or even a woman that you just met has had a really rotten day… but you want some sex… because. What would you do if I lost my hair all of the sudden. I couldn’t think of a better term for this but here’s the gist of it. Say your woman. Like a little bit. well. I never expected YOU to let (someone/something) get under your skin like this. blah. I’ve had such a shitty day… (blah. we can go on and on with this but I hope you get my drift. They are tongue in check and playful.” (You’re doing this to show her that it’s CRAZINESS for her to feel like she’s feeling… naturally. we now have to employ our most SECRET WEAPON… “The Tickle Tease” NOTHING changes the tone of a conversation faster than some “good ole” tickling. Start slow at first. you’re a guy and that’s what guys want. Missy… (whisper) it’s gonna take more than one (smile) Guys. To which you can reply: “Dang.) If she doesn’t snap out of her funk with this. this is what happened)” You: (Smiling) “Wow. would that mean you wouldn’t hang out any more? I TOTALLY expected more out of you. Here’s what you do: Her: “Man. keep in mind that these ARE NOT serious conversations. why is it that every woman thinks that she can buy you a drink and then try to get in your pants. feeling me up already and we just got here… geez…” “The Frame-Banging Tease” Okay.

It’s the ULTIMATE way of flirting and getting her to chase you. When you are teasing a woman. I can’t believe I just said BLAMMO… ha-ha (The above statement is a great example of self depreciating humor. you bonk her nose with your finger. Teasing is a fun way to build attraction and BOOKS have been written on the subject. by the way) “Physical Teasing” Before I end this. all while showing your strength as a man. I like to think of it as “playing with myself” without all the mess. bring back the old school “You’ve Got Something On Your Shirt” gag… where you point at a spot on her shirt and when she looks down. If you’re walking side by side and there is a physical object on her side… slowly start walking her into it.The Best of TSBMAG. so I stole that from “Stripes”… shoot me) Then you just start kissing and BLAMMO! Bumming Monkeys Time. I also like walking up behind my woman and “shanking” her if she has on sweats or loose shorts in the house… and then ACT like I’m going to do it when we’re out in public. Fun Stuff. Here’s my final tip on teasing… and pay attention because this is important. make sure that it’s fun for HER… but that you are ALSO AMUSING YOURSELF at the SAME TIME. Wow. I can’t help the fact that almost everyone else in life is lame. That always works great.COM You: (tickling) “Are you in a better mood yet? Tell me I’m the greatest ever… who’s your buddy… who’s your pal… (okay. because I could literally go on forever on this topic… physical humor and teasing ROCKS. That’s fun too. 322 . For example. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had people ask me: “You just trip yourself out don’t you?” Me: “Absolutely. Or… and this is always fun.

(smiling. 323 . I’m done. laughing… Note: Having fun. with a touch of self depreciation as well) That’s it.Social Superstar You should try it sometime instead of living in “lame-o land”.

The Best of TSBMAG. but there are also 324 . that cute girl standing in line at Starbuck’s today are all online. The fact of the matter is the same women you meet out at bars. In many respects the idea of meeting people online is still fairly new. Just as you would go to the mall. bookstores and coffee shops are on social networking sites. It’s not just for young people either. Obviously these sites are overflowing with women in their early 20’s and 30’s. there are well over 200 million members on MySpace alone with around 300. You should really view them as an online hang out.000 new users joining every day from around the world. a bar. And guess what???…half of those are women! WHAT TYPES OF GIRLS ARE ON THESE SITES? Social networking sites are different than traditional dating sites. you can use social networking sites to connect with and meet like-minded new friends. the coffee shop or a club to hang out and meet new people. The girl next door. And because it is continually becoming more and more socially acceptable these same girls are open to meeting up with guys they met online.COM Day 15 How to Create a Kick Ass MySpace and Facebook Profile Written by Race de Priest Originally Published: 07/01/2008 WHY ONLINE GAME ROCKS AND HOW YOU CAN GET STARTED RIGHT NOW Now that the internet is such a big part of our lives. So how are you supposed to go about meeting and dating women from online? Is a woman weird for meeting a guy from sites like MySpace and Facebook? Can you actually legitimately meet sane AND hot women from online? Every time there is a new way of doing something it takes time for people to get comfortable with it. at any given point in time there are more women online than there are in every bar in your city combined. the hot bartender. clubs. In fact. Facebook is close behind with about 250. but thanks to the emergence and popularity of social networking sites like MySpace and Facebook this is all changing.000 new users a day.

In a sense. It’s like owning a bar where the bouncer only let’s in girls that fit exactly what you want. At the same time you will be corresponding with several different women simultaneously so there is no bother if a particular girl doesn’t respond. Do you really want to miss out on such an easy way to meet all these women? I didn’t think so. Pacific Islander. she gets to see a more accurate picture of who you are while allowing you to learn at your own pace how to successfully interact with women. You have as much time as you need to craft the perfect response. She can’t shoot you down or embarrass you in front of her friends or other people. the reasons to add online game as a way to meet and date women is quite compelling. But it gets even better… IMAGINE A BAR FULL OF WOMEN HANDPICKED BY YOU When you meet women from sites like MySpace and Facebook you can literally browse and filter so that only the types of women you are looking for show up. there is no “fear of rejection”. This is a relief for many guys who have trouble knowing what to say. If a girl does not respond you simply move on…no harm no foul. As you can see. THERE IS NO APPROACH ANXIETY ONLINE There is absolutely no social pressure when messaging women online. Say you want a girl who is: Between 22 and 26 5′0″-5′7″ Single/divorced Christian White.Social Superstar tons of women between 34 to 44 as well. she is just a picture and some text. In addition. When you are relaxed at your house you are more able to come up with an authentic responses. Many of the world's best PUA’s and Social 325 . or Asian Slender or Athletic body No Children Straight Social Drinker Non smoker Some College or College Graduate Within 5 miles of your zip You can literally search for the exact type of woman you are looking for.

Remember to create a profile that is appealing to the type of girl you want to attract. what kind of job you have or what you do. a girl can figure out if you have any attractive qualities. and music). But the underlying principles are universal and many of the guys we have successfully coached used them all over the world on sites like Bebo. your profile says a lot about you. what you look like. Once again. books. If you want a bad girl with tattoos. what kind of friends you have. There are many elements that go into setting up your profile correctly. your hobbies. Hyves. Now the question is… HOW DO I SET UP MY PROFILE SO IT ATTRACTS WOMEN? Note: I will be specifically focusing on MySpace and Facebook because these are by far the largest social networking sites on the planet. Simplicity and Readability 326 . your interests (i. Here are the major things to keep in mind as you design your profile: Keep in mind the type of girl you want to attract. if other women are attracted to you. Think of your profile as the online equivalent of your first impression. Friendster. From your profile alone. Orkut.COM Artists still maintain their online profiles despite meeting women out in person because it is just too good not too. Match. what type of lifestyle you live. favorite movies. if you are unsure. HOW TO GET STARTED MEETING ALL THOSE CUTE GIRLS ONLINE The fist crucial step in meeting all those hot girls you see online is setting up your profile correctly.The Best of TSBMAG. After all. This is huge! Once you set your profile up correctly.e. it literally WORKS FOR YOU! It’s like having your own personal PR firm who goes ahead of you and gets all the girls excited about wanting to meet you when you arrive. and somewhat of how popular you are. go to the profiles of the types of girls you want to attract and copy their style or the style of the guy friends they have. It will form the basis for what a woman thinks about you and how she will interact with you. etc. you need to create a profile that connects with that type of girl.

I don’t care”. movies. and hobby interests. the beautiful women you hang out with every weekend. Women will abandon your profile quickly if it takes too much effort to get an idea of who you are. A good way to start out is to use a solid background with contrasting text colors (i. If you try to write about how cool you are. It is better to be brief yet have variety and keep her guessing. Things you DONT WANT to do in your About Me section: • DO NOT try to sell yourself by talking about how cool you are. the fun things you do. than to write your whole life story and bore her. They will most likely see this and say “I don’t know you. etc. simplicity and readability is the key. You want your profile to be as easy to read as possible. etc. the beautiful women you hang out with. And girls who don’t know you have no reason to spend their time reading about you unless you’ve compelled them to. You don’t need to go overboard in this area. white text on a black background or any light on dark color scheme).e. 327 .Social Superstar Your mom was right about making things legible. DO NOT be overly offensive DO NOT have terrible grammar/misspellings • • • Things you WANT to do in your About Me section: • • • Be Diverse List a variety of music. DO NOT write your life story. Be goofy. and music by artists like the Spice Girls. When to write and what to write Take careful consideration about what you write about yourself. you will be perceived as trying too hard to gain approval. Show her you are not a tool. You will be perceived as trying too hard to gain approval. List movies like The Little Mermaid. the fun things you do. Girls who don’t know you have no reason to spend their time reading about you.

be creative. Here are a few examples of disqualifying statements: Rules for being my MySpace/Facebook friend: • • • • • No liars (unless you are flirting) No flaky people No granny panties! (unless you are actually a grandma ) No psycho stalker chicks! I don’t care how hot you think you are! No BORING PEOPLE … You must be fun Another option is to put up a qualifying statement on your page. A disqualifier is any statement that demonstrates you have standards by declaring that the recipient is unqualified or ineligible for you. Here is one that we have used and has been very effective placed under the Who I’d Like to Meet section on MySpace or the About Me section on Facebook: “If you are cute rather than hot. spontaneous. Having standards indicates abundance and a strong sense of identity.The Best of TSBMAG. clever rather than cool. but not so much as to bore her. You know what you want and you have enough options so that if a girl does not match up. Use Disqualifying Statements Create a small list of disqualifiers. Don’t say “I’m new to this whole MySpace/Facebook thing” or “all my friends are on here so I figured I would create an account. than to write your whole life story and bore her. giving her more reason to search for a connection with you. Again. “I love meeting new people” or “I surround myself with positive. petite 328 . • Be Creative In your About Me section. we need just enough to intrigue her. Make her curious to find out more about you.” It doesn’t have to be long. fun.COM • When writing it is better to be brief yet have variety and keep her guessing. Going back to the characteristics women screen for. You can even leave out your interests. you can let her go. you want to be an enigma she wants to figure out. and outrageous people.” Talk about things like.

etc. some doing something goofy. If you do not know what you want. A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS The pictures you choose to use on your profile are vitally important. then the other seven are creating a bad impression. you just need to add an application like Big Photo or Slideshows. It is as if each picture is showing off a different side of your personality. Your pictures can make her curious. If in doubt. some travel shots. On Facebook. your page is your way of demonstrating how cool and how socially desirable you are.” You must show that you have standards. women like a man with some depth to him.HotorNot. In most cases. They want a man with a sense of mystery. Women like men who know what they want. If you upload ten pictures and you only look good in three of them. put your pictures up on a photo-rating site like www. 329 . This allows a girl to get a snapshot of how exciting and fun you are. Embed pictures into your profile We have found that actually embedding pictures into your profile is the easiest and most effective way to make a great first impression on girls. Use a range of pictures showing different aspects of your personality. You don’t want to have twelve pictures of you drinking beer with your buddies. the first step is to upload your pictures to an image hosting site like www. Remember. then I would like to meet you.com.com or your own MySpace photo album. Have some action shots. now is the time to sit down and figure it out.photobucket. and that is one of the most important first steps to attracting a woman online. Why not make it as good as possible? The following are some guidelines to follow when choosing what pictures to use: Use a variety You want to have pictures depicting you doing a variety of different activities. these will be a woman’s first impression of you.Social Superstar rather than slim. It would be far better to only have those three in which you look your best. On MySpace. As we have already learned. some of you with your niece or your dog. a challenge to figure out. some partying with hot girls. and see which ones receive the highest rating. Choose only the best Choose only the pictures in which you look the best.

e. etc. etc. Girls love to make other girls jealous! Caution: If you are going to put up a picture of you with your shirt off. paste the following HTML code into any section you want the photo to show up (i.e.jpg will be re-placed with the URL pointing to your image.The Best of TSBMAG. if you are going to put up a picture of just yourself. About Me. You can find music on MySpace in the Music section. dancing. which you can get to from the main navigation bar at the top of the page. go out to a club and tell the hottest girl you can find that you need some new MySpace/Facebook pictures to make your ex-girlfriend jealous. make sure you are in good shape and doing an activity where it is appropriate to have it off (i. make it either a really good/professional picture (no wannabe modeling pictures with your shirt off please). don’t put up a picture of you shirtless…EVER! OTHER USEFUL ATTRACTION ELEMENTS AND TIPS Use Music Music is a great way to connect with girls. Using a playlist is even better.imagehost. This is just one more way for her to connect with you.com/images/pic. Who I’d like to Meet): <img src=”http://www. playing football.com.imagehost. We have received so many comments on the songs we have chosen. at the beach. If you don’t have any. Otherwise make it a group picture with cute girls in it.jpg” width=”400”> <br /> Where http://www. rock-climbing. The playlist tool we use is: www. This technique will ensure that your images are not too large and that they’re easy to view. Interests. or one of you doing something exciting like surfing. Hint: write funny captions to go along with your pictures to demonstrate even more of your personality Just paste the following HTML code above the embed image code shown above: <div><font size=+2>Picture caption</font></div> Main profile picture For your main profile picture.). 330 . By specifying the width property in the <img> tag you ensure that your photos will have a consistent width (the height of the image will be adjusted automatically to maintain the original aspect ratio).projectplaylist. But just to be safe.COM Next. That way you can have a whole variety of music.com/images/pic. posing in front of the Eiffel Tower.

text table td.text td.text td.} td.text td.e.text table br. td. she will definitely wonder. they can also see what you are up to. We suggest that you remove all of your personal information such as email addresses and cell phone numbers.text .btext {display:none.text table {background-color:transparent. You can modify your privacy settings by clicking on the “privacy” link next to the “logout” link in the top right corner. which you can get using the technique we’ll cover next. so why do it online? While the mini-feed makes it convenient to see what your friends are up to online. If she ever asks you why your friends are hidden.ztext table . comments you made.text td.text td.text td. td. “They all kept getting jealous about who was #1” or “I am a secret agent. td. 331 .redlink. turning off) most if not all of the notifications. what you wrote.text table table br {display:inline. comments you received.text td.text td.border:0.} td.orangetext15.padding:0.text span. and even when you add a friend! For the simple fact that you are going to be messaging multiple girls. If she can’t see your friends and sees a number of comments from gorgeous looking girls.text table table table. You don’t randomly give your personal contact information to people you don’t know. Facebook also lists all of your recent actions on the site through a system called Mini-Feed. By default it lists all kinds of information like who you wrote to. and I don’t want to put my friends’ lives in peril.} </style> We recommend you do this anyway.” Adjust your Privacy Settings (FACEBOOK ONLY) There is far more of your personal contact information available to the general public on Facebook than on MySpace.} td. it would be counterproductive for them to see that you have messaged other girls with the same or even similar messages For this reason.text td. we recommend you configure the privacy settings for News Feed and Mini-Feed by unchecking (i. you can place this code in any section to hide your friends list: <style type=”text/css”> td.text table {height:0. td.text td. td.text table table td {padding:3.} td.Social Superstar Hide your Friends List (MYSPACE ONLY) If you are just starting and have no friends. just say something like.

This mystery builds attraction. she will wonder what makes you so sexy. Thanks.COM Create Instant Social Proof To get comments on your MySpace page or Facebook wall from beautiful women just use this message: Subject: I was wondering … Body: My ex is stalking my profile.The Best of TSBMAG. demonstrate that there are a variety of different people that enjoy your company and show that you can have fun and laugh at yourself. This adds an air of mystique and ensures you don’t tap out potential girls in your area. Having your profile set up correctly will literally supercharge your success with women online and put you light 332 . Could you leave a comment to make her jealous? You know how it is…haha.{your name/screen name/nickname} or Subject: Strange Question Body: My crazy friends are sending me on an online scavenger hunt (I didn’t even know they had those?) for my (put in bday or some event that compels her to want to help you) and I have to get a sassy/fun comment on my page from the following: 1. A girl should be able to look at your profile and very quickly get an idea of what you are all about. The dorkiest girl I can find Can you guess which one you are? Haha…so if you could help me out I will name my first born child after you… ha-ha j/k but I would really appreciate it . Make your profile easy to read. show that you have a diverse personality.(name) These comments will give you social proof. . THINK OF IT AS YOUR OWN PERSONAL COMMERCIAL All in all think about your profile as your own personal commercial. It’s brilliant! Note: Make sure to use this technique with girls outside your area. The hottest girl I can find 2. The cutest girl I can find 3. So when a new girl looks at your page and sees all these other attractive girls writing sexy things about you.

Cheers.Social Superstar years ahead of all those other guys out there leaving your competition in the dust. Race 333 . Remember to have fun with this and if you have any questions feel free to ask.

you need to (1) come up in as many searches as possible. running…). to run a successful search you are better off putting in a noun: runner. However. 3. both physical and verbal.or losers-only pastime to a necessary skill. To have a great profile. Most searches that you will run are “keyword” searches (though many online dating services let you set all types of parameters via advanced search forms). and (2) deliver the goods once someone clicks on your profile. We flirt for a variety of purposes–from screening for a long-term partner. it’s important that you have a great profile. flirting online has gone from a geeks. that can be used in almost any situation.The Best of TSBMAG. Early-stages flirting: the first few e-mails and/or texts. 2. 334 . As far as coming up in random searches. Creating a Great Profile Whether you have a subscription to an online dating service or not. There are three main types of online flirting: 1. it’s important to understand how search engines work. Later-stages flirting: keeping the momentum. in today’s increasingly technological world. Verbs don’t usually fare too well in keyword searches because there are so many conjugations (run.COM Day 16 Tips for Flirting Online Written by Honey Originally Published: 07/02/2008 Flirting consists of a variety of tactics. odds are that you have a profile on some kind of social networking site. Because people are becoming increasingly accessible online (you can find out far more about far more people in a day via their profiles than you could in person). to simply being social. If you are the one searching. Pre-emptive flirting: creating a great profile. to scoring a one-night stand. ran. The vast majority of our flirting techniques were developed for situations in which people were connecting face-to-face.

Man up and give the lady (or fella) some real communication. have fun. For anyone who’s been on these types of sites for any amount of time at all. While you don’t want to go on and on. For heaven’s sake. ever. How about you and I go see it and then tell my friend how wrong he was about Jet Li?” Now the first thing you’ll probably notice is that the second example is much longer. If you’re running a search and come up empty the first time. you could try some synonyms as well. these half-ass forms of communication are reviled 335 . they’re halfway to e-mailing you! There’s a huge difference between the following: • • “I like to hang out with friends. Tell stories. Ask questions. the two big keys to a great profile are making sure your profile is upbeat (no one wants to date a bummer) and saying something of substance. Tell stories. List specifics. List specifics. if you like to run. if the online world is like a giant bar. you might also put jogger or marathon in your profile. if you’re into that—I’m not. However. Once someone gets to your profile. for reasons I’ll explain) is pretty similar to my advice about profiles. or “poke” them or any of that gay sh#t. And don’t be afraid to ask questions—a nice rhetorical question gets the other person thinking about how they’d answer. that’s no accident.Social Superstar When you are creating your own profile. This is especially important because no matter which of the three terms someone searches for. you can find me at BJ’s brewery with friends. “wink” at someone. he almost spit his beer out! What a waste of a great porter. and watch movies.’s performance saved Iron Man. to catch people you might have missed. For example. you can easily increase the likelihood of coming up in other people’s searches by using synonyms. you’ll come up. and once they have an answer in their head. one caveat is never. Well. my advice about the first few e-mails (or online chats. then how can you come off as a person of value if you don’t have anything to offer beyond clichés? The First Few E-mails Unsurprisingly.” “On any given Tuesday. the most important thing is specificity. sipping on a Jeremiah Red and talking about how Robert Downey Jr. When I told my buddy that I thought The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor stood a chance of being decent.

” He said. I sent him a one-line e-mail. and he e-mailed me back to say that we had a favorite author in common. When he e-mailed to ask. I said. and also starts to build a non-threatening sexual vibe (”Maybe we should meet up at the dog park Saturday afternoon? I promise. The reason for this is that the other person will then offer their digits without you having to weaken your position at all by asking! I met my BF on MySpace. “I’m sorry. you kinda are). Now a year later he’s there to greet me when I get home from work!”). but last summer I found an abandoned Jack Russell in the parking lot of my complex. but never found them. you should definitely respond back with an email.” Type real words. so half your work is already done for you! You can tease them about using a wink at some point later on. Say something specific that you liked about their profile.e. I don’t add people that I haven’t met in person. I looked for his owners. “How about beer on Friday?” And that was our first date… The reason that I’m going to come out against online chat is that (and I know this is a personal pet peeve) I hate all that misspelling and “textspeak. in a seemingly contradictory move. and word it as a compliment ("I couldn’t help but be excited when I noticed that you are an animal lover”). • • I’m not a believer in asking for the digits but rather proposing the meetup. After a couple exchanges he tried to add me as a friend and couldn’t because he didn’t know my last name. only one of us bites…”). if you’re too chicken to make a real first move. if someone winks at you and you at all like their profile. a phone call or a meeting.COM and make you seem wussy (which. damnit! And since I type about 70 wpm 336 . As a question that escalates the interaction to the next level. Now. The formula for a great early e-mail is pretty simple: • • If they e-mailed or winked at you first. i. You know they’re interested. and our first couple of interactions followed the pattern above. Tell a story from your own experience that relates to what you liked about their profile (”I’ve never been a dog person.The Best of TSBMAG. thank them for doing so.

or just say how much you’re looking forward to your next meetup. avoiding clichés at all costs. The big tips: Again. • Keep your e-mails brief and stick to one topic. and knowing when enough’s enough. go for it—just remember the possible cons. and make sure you’re not e-mailing a work account. • • Flirting is an art. and don’t you dare send that second e-mail until you hear back from her first. sustain momentum.Social Superstar and hardly anyone else does. Best of luck! 337 . make a mild sexual comment. Tease. I like e-mail because you can control the length and content as well as proofread for spelling and other errors before you hit “send.” It’s just much easier to put your best foot forward when you use e-mail as your medium. Don’t send more than two e-mails per day. use real words. Keep it light! You should be making deep connections in person—trying to do so over e-mail just makes you a bummer. spell everything correctly. If they suggest chatting. tone. and the keys are paying attention to the other person. and keep your interactions light and fun. and body language is lost when it’s just a window on someone’s computer screen. not overwhelming her with super-long e-mails (which also kind of make you look like a loser who has nothing better to do in your spare time). a flirty e-mail is a great tool to keep in touch. the goal is to sustain momentum. it’s pretty tough for me to come off as anything except overly chatty. Keeping the Momentum Once you’ve met in person. you should be teasing her with the promise of your presence. Again. not to come across as desperate or stalker-ish. since so many nuances.

Don’t Contact Her for At Least 48 Hours I know it sounds hard doesn’t it? But you have to stick by these rules. make her laugh and somehow manage to get her number. Rule # 1 .The Best of TSBMAG. You end up calling her a couple of days later. to ask her out on a date. You still don’t get a response. shopping centre or the tennis club. thinking to yourself “where did it go wrong?” So here is the thing. You talk to her expecting that things are going to pick up where you left off and are utterly stunned when she starts making excuses as to why she can’t meet up with you.. You think to yourself “SWEET!! I’m in”. Because when you can't wait for the 48 hours you appear needy and in need of a life. So you call again and finally you get an answer. You are left scratching your head. You see a hot chick at a club. 338 . To some of you it doesn’t make sense. You think 'hey she is busy' and you try again later that same day. Sound good? Let's get started. Well I’m going to lay out for you what is REALLY happening and what you really SHOULD be doing. Here is the thing. She doesn’t pick up. You build up the guts to talk to her. like the rule book suggests. I have been on dates with guys and literally like 2 minutes after the date they are messaging me and telling me what a great time they had on the date and how they would like to see me again.. She says that she will get back to you and she never does.COM Day 17 Phone Game Strategy Written by Hot Alpha Female Originally Published: 07/03/2008 So let me paint the picture. Some of you may be baffled by this whole situation.

It means that you can actually think about what you want to write. See it's great for us and is great for you too. Now the main agenda with text is to warm her up. Anything more than 4 days and the girl (if she is interested in you) starts to get pissed because you didn’t call her within that “calling period” and she assumes that you are not interested. Now as a general rule with messaging keep it short and sweet. Now that doesn’t mean being something that you are not. Just make sure that when you follow this rule that you don’t wait too long after 48 hours.Social Superstar Then I have also had guys who send me a message straight after a date and then send me another one 30 minutes later wondering why I haven’t sent them a reply yet. At the absolute 339 .. get a life. If a guy texts us within 2 days of us handing out our number then that is sufficient enough for us to know that you are interested without appearing really needy and wussy. The only thing that runs through my mind is. and ewwww.. Rule # 2 . You can mess with a girl and pretend that you are not interested. stalker. So do it not only as a favor for me.Send Her A Text Msg First You know scoring a date is kind of like making a sale. Banter a lot. but don’t get into these messaging conversations. Every girl is comfortable with texting. you don’t have to think on the spot. but this is not one of those instances. And there is no logical way to explain it. but for all the other poor girls out there. So in other words you are going to have to look like something that she would want to date/buy. Except the item that you are selling is yourself. But it does mean that for the moment you operate within a certain guidelines until you have internalized all this “game stuff” … so bear with me ok? So as part of this. stick to the rule of messaging her first before you call her. Let her know that you are on her radar and that you will be in contact with her soon. It's like an instant turn off. In fact we like them more to begin with.

because they feel in control by being the ones to have the last say. But you have to look at it from the point of view that YOU are the one in control because you have the strength to stop the messaging first =) Rule # 3 . He would msg this girl and then when she replied back. Essentially you want to get her back into the same state as she was in when she gave you that phone number. Rule # 4 . you are the one that has to stop sending her msgs. But one of the things that I heard one of the guys does on David D’s cds. That’s the thing with phone calls. This means that when the conversation is nearing an end. He found that significantly increased his chance of getting to speak to her.COM maximum make sure that you only send 2-3 msgs in one conversation.Keep It Light And Keep It Casual Ok so when you call her for the first time after she has given you her phone number then it's not a good time to start going into a deep and meaningful conversation. You actually want to keep things fairly casual and most importantly keep it brief.The Best of TSBMAG. But just because it’s a short amount of time. Some of my friends have trouble with this. Maybe refer to a joke that you had previously found funny with her and give her updated content on it. 340 . This will bring her back to that place and help her feel more comfortable with you. because she would have to be close to her phone in order to send the msg right?! Brilliant idea and I suggest that all you guys use it. doesn’t mean that you don’t have your work cut out for you! The first thing that you want to do when you call the girl is to break the ice and get her laughing. If a girl doesn’t think that she will be comfortable with you or will be able to trust you then she will not even consider going on that date with you. Always be the one to end the messaging conversation. You want to be able to establish comfort before you can even consider asking her out.Msg Her and Then Call Her Ok so I have to admit that this is not something that I came up with. The best way to do this is to refer to something that happened when you last saw her. then he would call her within a minute or so.

. So in regards to what you should say. just leave a short msg and then hang up. Like 5 minutes. is know you. As a general rule with this whole gaming and dating thing … Less is always MORE! Seriously… You don’t have to get an update of what this chick has been doing in the past 2 days. Break the ice and get her to laugh before you even consider asking her out. She doesn’t have to know about all your past relationships before you guys go on a date. Rule # 6 . Give her the gift of missing you ok? So with a voice mail you need to remember to keep it short and sweet. who is wasting your time and YOUR credit! Random Tips 341 .Leave one voicemail that’s IT! If you have to leave a voicemail then make sure that its only one. If you are constantly trying to impede on her space then she is totally not going to appreciate it. like you and trust you . you need to remember to give her the space to think about you. You don’t have to repeat your number and all that crap. Two or more becomes stalkerish. be prepared for a voicemail and know what you are going to say as well. When calling a girl.. Rule # 5 .Keep It Short and Sweet This kind of follows on from the other points. When courting a girl. keep it light and keep it casual.Social Superstar So remember the rule. All you have to get a chick to do. I know it sounds silly but its true and this is what goes through a chick's head. then you can say something a little ball busting and then get her to give you a call back.and then you can get her to go anywhere and do just about anything with her. But seriously don’t talk too long. There is nothing worse than a long winded voicemail msg with a guy who doesn’t know what he is talking about.

If you find her being more quiet that usual. Now with that said … Now I want to see better conversion rates ok? *winks* 342 .COM Some of you may be wondering how many times you should call before giving up. There is no point in doing the wrong things over and over hoping that you will get a positive result in the end.. and this message contained some call to action on her behalf. If you message a girl and she doesn’t message you back. make her laugh and have a good time. it means that she is comfortable with you. because A) she thinks that you are a freak or B) she hasn’t warmed up to you yet. Firstly you should message first. then there is something up and she is not comfortable. When a girl talks with ease. If the girl messages back. You have to do what works. Remember to warm a girl up to you. In regards to what you should talk to her about … your main aim is to bust her balls. Here’s a tip.. then your chances of getting to talk to her again are much higher. You can tell that a girl has warmed up to you when she is laughing at your jokes and the conversation is flowing. then you need to know that you are going to have to do some major work on getting this girl to go on a date with you. Keep it short and sweet and always leave her wanting more. Persistence is not the only tool you need.The Best of TSBMAG.

I use a few acronyms. I use texting for the following reasons: 1. Since item 4 is fairly self-explanatory. consider this. Maintaining a connection. Also. and supplement your lines with smiley's and other emoticons. This also sets you apart from the legions of dorks who can’t spell worth a crap.3. around 30. Texting has similar properties to flirting over email (or sending messages using facebook or myspace). use punctuation. Quick scheduling or announcements when I’m on the go.Social Superstar Day 18 Text Game for the Pua Written by Lance Originally Published: 07/07/2008 Text game is an integral part of my arsenal. I have a few exceptions here. Using textspeak on a 28 year woman with an MBA would totally deattract her. use it! Don’t use cutesy textspeak (ur instead of your. To get the high value woman. etc). language is part and parcel of what pickup is all about. and the girls I socialize with are high value woman in their mid or late 20’s that are educated. I’ll focus on 1 . 2. Escalation. because you avoid the profanity but still express surprise or shock. I want to say a few words about writing style. such as OMG or WTF. flirting via text is very effective. but the quality that sets it apart is immediacy. 4. 3. Good spelling and punctuation. you’re coming from a position of high value and it shows you have a command of language. Okay. WTF is a good one. I’m a bit older. Before I get started. Here’s how it breaks down: Flirting When used in the right ways. Flirting. Everyone has a cell phone. Why the big deal about grammar and spelling? Because if you’re using good English. keep your language as tight as possible. and pretty much everyone has it on their 343 . Obviously.

If you send a text. it’s possible that person won’t read it until the evening or the next day if you’re sending it to a personal account (and you should…don’t send flirty emails to a work or business account). The key is being playful.” This creates a strong statement of interest and let’s her know that you’re absolutely interested in going further. either in the same night or the next morning. conversation was great. Not only that. If anyone wants to dive into point. “You looked totally sexy in that dress. If you’re a chick and you’re getting dozens more texts than the next girl.COM person at all times. interesting. It’s like playing a little game. There’s nothing wrong with a compliment as long as you’ve established a strong masculine frame during the date. it’s crazy. Conversely. if you send an email. and fun.” “Had a blast. Everyone loves to receive text messages! I haven’t delved into this. I’ll use texts as a direct compliment. you would love it!” “Guess what I’m doing right now…it’s f’ing awesome!” “Just read your horoscope. One way I flirt over text is to send messages that will compel her to write back. I’d love to hear some perspectives. Here are a couple of examples: “Hey. I’ll use this to spur a longer text conversation and then mix in some “normal” text conversation.” All of these messages are intended to come out of the blue and compel her to write back and ask what it is you’re talking about. 344 . you’re a great kisser WOW!” “You’re the cutest Leo EVER rawr. but I think some people derive a certain degree of social clout from the number of texts they get.The Best of TSBMAG. ie basic flirting. Once she responds. the other person is going to read it within a few seconds. just ate lunch at this great Thai place. I often do this after a first date. This gets her thinking about you and this method can be used to maintain a connection or escalate. then you’re more popular…at least that seems to be the psychology. it just depends on the direction you want to go. but getting a text is like a little treat that breaks up the monotony of your day. you should banter back and forth for a bit. This dialogue establishes that you’re a normal guy and not a player (ha-ha) or merely a flirt. It’ll pump her up and get her thinking about how cool you are. such as asking how her day went.

” 345 .Social Superstar Maintain a Connection If I’ve number closed a chick and I know I can’t see her again until the next weekend. what are you doing??” “I loved your glasses. I like texting during the day when I know she’s at work. or a horoscope (astrology is chick crack). it’s the hot guy you met an hour ago. Usually what I do when maintaining a connection is to offer a bit of value. Let’s face it. OR.com and hit her with one. but I think it’s really true. Your goal should be very simple. just make her smile! Credit Sean Deacon on that one. drama. Keep in mind that pickups are tenuous affairs and flakes can happen at any time…texting helps to cement a future meetup. you can make one up on the spot and sex it up a little. I rarely do fluff talk in these instances because you’ll risk losing the attraction by seeming mundane. This can be great fun and it’s an easy way to escalate. I’ll text her just a little bit during the week to remind her who I am. I’ll mix this in with a couple of emails.” Escalation Texts are a great way to introduce or maintain a sexual frame. Monday at the office sucks (if you’ve got an office job) and getting flirty texts can be a real pick-me-up. but here are another couple of examples that initiate a value giving conversation: “Holy sh*t. if you’re really slick. and hot monkey sex. As with everything else you should calibrate. a two line story.” “We should have talked to you longer DAMN you’re cute. For instance. if you did a quick 5′ pickup and number closed a girl with a minimum of sexual framing. I’ve never met a girl who didn’t like getting her horoscope. the craziest thing just happened to me!” “Your horoscope is insane today. you can hit her like this: “Hey.” What’s great about the horoscope thing is you can look up the quickie horoscopes on astrology. and a phone call or two to maintain the connection until I see her again. some MySpace stuff. You can use the same lines from above. you’ve got that sexy nerdy look RAWR. Don’t be afraid to cut loose. Here’s an example: “The planets are aligned–today is a day for secrets. The key here is to flirt and be a bit mysterious so that she’s compelled to see you when you ask for a first meetup. such as a laugh.yahoo.

Let’s say you’ve had sex once and you’re setting a date for next Friday night. Chicks eat this up. this shit kills.” “Happy hour on Friday…Don’t worry. Try these: “Okay.” If you’re deep into a sexual frame with a chick. but you’re going to have to work extra hard for me. and if you’re calibrated properly and pumping out good lines. I’ll meet you for drinks. OMG I could barely keep my hands off you!!” “I can tell you’re going to be trouble. 346 .The Best of TSBMAG. dating or FBs). All of these lines are examples and you should easily be able to come up with your own.COM This way you’re either establishing a sexual tone or maintaining one and getting her excited about thinking about you. I’ll still flirt because it’s a hell of a lot of fun and it gets her hot for the Lance cock. I’m a big fan of these: “Had a blast. She’ll follow your lead and likely respond back with flirty.” “Three guesses what I’m doing…if you get it wrong. This shows you’re playful and flirty and will get her into a sexual state of mind. You can do pretty much the same things if you’ve already had a date with a minimum of Kino or maybe just a kiss close.” “My mom warned me about girls like you. you can and should use text as a way to maintain attraction.)” Work your basic push-pull and teasing in there. sexy texts.e. Even if I’m dating someone and I know I can nail her whenever I want. Hit her with texts that have a sexual tone and just plow forward. I won’t let you take advantage of me . you’re getting spanked. or if you’ve already had sex with her and plan on doing it again (i.

and even if you can it would be a stupid waste of energy. You’re going to have to be. Don’t try to do a first date on a weekend. ready to give a “primetime” night to someone you just met. I also remind myself of a handful of innocent touching moves that prime her for the kiss. Start the date at a quiet bar well after dinner so you don’t have to worry about getting food. well. Quick tip: On your way to dates call up a couple friends and shoot the shit for a while. especially if you haven’t kissed her yet. It’s natural to be nervous. you want that part of your brain ready. first dates are the most fun part of the game. Here are a few things to make them more successful. but if your goal is to get into her pants as fast as possible. You can get a lot done taking girls to coffee and ice cream dates. 3. Pick the right day. She’s more nervous than you are. There is no way you can memorize enough routines for a two hour or more date. especially with the pressure of getting laid hanging over your head. Preparation. 2.Social Superstar Day 19 How to Go on First Dates Written by Roosh V Originally Published: 07/08/2008 Besides sex. The worst thing you can do is lounge around at home all day in front of your computer and then go out without talking beforehand. real and this is where I hope your vibe is fun and interesting. Stick to Monday through Thursday for the first date. Pick the right venue. But I guarantee you she is more nervous than you are. simply because she’s a girl and we all know the ones who can’t even go to the bathroom without a friend. Since first dates are mostly a talking affair. The only thing I do before dates is have two fun routines ready. it’s very hard not to get at least a make out if she’s had three drinks in her. Even if the date is short of a blockbuster. usually the cube and some type of fake palm read. Weekend dates send the wrong message that you value her too much. The more you have your internal game straightened out and 347 . If not then dates will be a challenge. Plus chances are she will be busier on weekends anyway. 1. 4. You have two people who barely know each other alone and isolated with sexual tension and possibility in the air. you must go for drinks.

That’s your number one goal. going on dates every week and noting what worked and what didn’t. It took me about six years of constant practice but I figured out the “vibe”. I was too scared I would get rejected and look like an idiot. but even before that I remember my strategy to getting kisses used to be hoping and wishing she’d make the move and do it on her own. I made A LOT of stupid mistakes when first starting out in the game. Whether this is reality or not doesn’t matter… just believe it. The first half hour will have almost no touching probably. then touching her hands and putting your arm behind her in the booth of the lounge you picked. Plus even if the date goes well. Focus on escalation. I also stumbled on half a dozen touching 348 . This is especially useful on dates when you're focused less on routines than when you first approach. you can’t make the assumption there will be a second.The Best of TSBMAG. The farther you get on the first date. You want to stir up some anxiety and fear that she’s being stood up so that her insecurities are driven inward instead of on you. A touch here or there that gets extended as the night goes on. most of the work in turning out a good first date is done before you even show up. it’s still a smart idea to go for it as you drop her home because it makes your job much easier for the second date. Even if you don’t think you will get the lay on the same night. A little bit of preparation goes a long way in dates and it makes sense to do because you worked hard to meet her and get her out and don’t want to blow it with stupid mistakes. I cannot stress how important this is. where she judges you and picks for flaws. Think of her on a stage. mill around for a while until you are late. 7. but then the drinks get in your system and it becomes natural.COM believe a girl should prove her value to you. 6. While you don’t want to sound like a total idiot on the date. The kiss will be a foregone conclusion. a mindset that keeps your game on without trying to game. I have a friend who shows up fifteen minutes late and I’m not sure that is extreme or not but I’m always at least five minutes later. Even if you arrive early. the less work you have to do on a second. How about if her long lost ex boyfriend calls the next day? You’ll kick yourself if you didn’t push as far as you could get. As you probably noticed. the less you will be nervous. I sucked it up when I had enough and just started approaching like a machine. Show up late. Go for the lay. twirling and spinning for your pleasure. the reason you kiss her will be more because of the touching than the conversation. 5.

and also the idea of the multi-venue date system to increase rapport and trust.Social Superstar moves that help escalate on dates and in the bedroom. 349 . Of course it’s backed by my Bust out the Condoms Guarantee. I share all this and a lot more in my book Bang.

A little while after going on the site I started an online flirtation with this cute Filipino girl. she came back to my house for a bit. It was depressing me. My better judgment told me to wait a day or two before contacting her again… but I couldn’t help it. and teasing one another… it was genuinely the best date I had in months. and the evening ended on a high note. or that I just couldn’t attract the ones I wanted. Although I didn’t get a kiss that night. The next day I couldn’t stop thinking about her. Something along the lines of “had a really great time last night. When she arrived at my house. we were laughing a lot. About that time I went on Match. She would write me these long rambling emails at four in the morning (that were just the most amusing things to read)… and I soon found myself very attracted to her. The conversation was flowing naturally. it was that the ones I was meeting just weren’t up to my standards. Mid way through the date I was already imagining our future together. She never called me back. I sent her an email that night. When we got to the bar. doing shots together.com. things went even better. These girls were falling for me quickly. What day this week do you want to play tennis” (we had talked about playing tennis on the date) She didn’t respond to the email for a couple days.COM Day 20 How to Get a Day Two Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/08/2008 A few years ago I was going through a slump with women.The Best of TSBMAG. and I would soon have to break their hearts. I was sensing a connection I didn’t feel with the other girls. You are a really funny guy. When she did respond. I waited a week then emailed her again “Guess we didn’t connect as much 350 .” She never mentioned the tennis invite. And although it had only been one day since I saw her. The night I got her email I called her. it felt like an eternity. It was not so much that I wasn’t meeting any. We made arrangements to meet. I was really starting to believe that either there were no quality girls left in the world. She didn’t answer so I left a message. she was even hotter than her online photos portrayed her to be. Within minutes of talking to her I was already feeling like this was going to be different. all she wrote was “I had a good time too.

Once I decided that I liked her I started working too hard to impress her. Mistakes that will Prevent Day Two Too quickly deciding that you like her. and it will immediately lower your value and put her in the position of being the prize. I began really analyzing what went wrong… and it became painfully obvious why she had no desire to see me again. We hadn’t even finished our first date and I was already asking her to play tennis together. I really believed that I had experienced a connection with the Filipino girl. I remember at one point I was smiling. Because I felt there was this “connection” there. The previous girls that I was dating I was always the one doing the judging. to go see a movie she mentioned. I was complimenting her way too much. My hope is that by reading through these mistakes I made you might be able to notice a thing or two that you’re doing that might be preventing you from getting a second date. I would sit back and let them prove their worth to me. and she asked “what?” and I said “You’re just really cute. This put me in the position to be the prize. 351 . Normally I would never show my hand on a date… I would always keep the girl guessing what was going through my mind. The one girl I actually felt a connection with didn’t even have interest in a second date. You’re really nice… I’m just not sure what I’m looking for right now in terms of relationships. I let my guard down. I truly believed she was feeling the same way. Girls can sense when you’re investing more than they are. Resorting to Nice Guy Lines. The mistake I made on this date was that I gave too much away. Because I felt so comfortable with her I felt at ease to tell her about my recent trouble finding a girl I really liked. She wrote back the next day saying “Sorry I’ve just been busy. I was way too attached to the outcome of the date.Social Superstar as I thought” or something AFC like that.” AGHHH I kept bringing up plans for a second date. I kept telling her how fun she was. I decided too soon that I liked her. I dropped all “player” mode and started to open up with her way to soon. Below I’m going to go over the mistakes I made on that meeting. With the Filipino girl.” BAM it was over.

Here I was 2 hours into a great date and I was scared to leave my hand on her waist for more than a second. Once we got to the bar. and when I did I would quickly pull away as to not scare her. a large part of attraction occurs when the girl is away from you and thinking about you. she was the one who suggested that we move to a table in the back. But that particular night I felt compelled to try to make plans to immediately see her again.The Best of TSBMAG.’ When you don’t call. Normally. Contacting her too Soon After Day One. she quickly took the role of leader. In Bang. When the bar got crowded. and was scared to ruin the evening by “moving too fast. her brain went “OK I have this guy… now let me decide if I want him. The whole time she’s waiting for my call my value is increasing in her mind by leaps and bounds. I used the fact that we had such a good time as a reason to call the next day. I even broke one of my cardinal date rules. It was like I was so scared of making a wrong move that I gave all power to her. The fact that we had such a good time should have been used as a reason to wait a few days to call. even on dates with girls I didn’t like.” I would very rarely make any physical contact. 352 . always be the one who ends it. The less sure she is in her status with you. Although we were having a good time together. she was the one who suggested we go on the dance floor. Remember. I would be advancing towards sex after an hour into the date.” Trying to Plan the Next Meeting Before the Date Ended. the more time she is going to spend thinking about you. Roosh says “always say ’see you soon’ when you end a date. Let her Call the Shots. About midnight she is the one to say “it's getting late we should get going. her brain is going “Does he want me?” That is what you want her brain thinking. I threw it all away by contacting her the next night. If she really had a good time she would be going crazy waiting for my call. and have always naturally done since her. I was in “nice guy mode”. She was the one suggesting what to drink. The minute I contacted her.COM Not Escalating Kino. By making immediate plans you don’t give the girl the joy of wondering when she’s going to hear from you again. when the DJ played a song she liked.” That was something that I always naturally did before her.

As many mistakes as I made on the date itself. Roosh gave you a perfect strategy for day one. And when I sensed she was blowing me off… I did the worst possible thing my sending her a message stating my feelings and trying to guilt her into seeing me again. I got needy and contacted her right away. If you follow his strategy and avoid the mistakes listed in this lesson than you should be having no trouble getting second dates.Social Superstar Acting Needy When She Wasn’t Responding Quick Enough. Whenever she delayed contacted me. 353 . I still believe I could have savaged it if I was able to stay cool during our contacts post date. So how do you get a day two? If you want to know how to get a day two… the answer is to not make these mistakes on day one. Unfortunately I wasn’t.

When Sparks Fly Extreme attraction develops under the safe haven of friendship. the viewer would be most likely banging his head on his popcorn saying “get on with it already!” The main trouble is that whenever we are in alone dates. In fact. the devil called ‘friendship conscience’ comes in to ruin everything. but one that has a gripping plot and an explosive love scene. It doesn’t always lead to sex. it’s the ‘chemistry’ that happens between individuals who like each other.Not porn.The Best of TSBMAG. we’ve known each other too long to let something like a relationship ruin our friendship. they communicate a lot and spend time together.COM Day 21 Building Sexual Tension Written by Evil Woobie Originally Published: 07/10/2008 Sexual tension happens when two individuals feel attracted to each other. The following words echo through our minds: “Hey. though usually it does. I dated a guy who I shared a wonderful friendship with before going for the plunge. watch a movie with a story line that involves sexual tension . Friends have several things in common. but don’t have sex. there was an undercurrent of attraction that can’t be ignored. Escalating the Sexual Tension Here are some subtle things a guy can do to fan the flames of burning attraction and cross the border between friends and friends-withbenefits: 1.” And so. Think Top Gun (Tom Cruise) 354 . We both know we are not ready for that. At one or the other’s place. mind you. In simple terms. and the onlooker throws his soda at the screen. at least not yet. We’d see each other constantly and while all the things we did were wholesome. and could go on and on for a lifetime without the individuals concerned acting on it. if our wholesome scenes were to be made into a movie. At what point does the attraction build so that individuals enjoying a platonic friendship just let go and freely act on the attraction? This happens when sexual tension peaks. nothing happens.

The trick is not to sound too eager. now it’s time to let her know that you think she’s hot. rapid heartbeat. Online chat . being very. Besides.e. stimulated senses. Encourage her to talk about her fantasies. very scared is always an excuse to cuddle up.Social Superstar and Disclosure (Demi Moore). this will translate as sincere admiration more than harassment. regardless if it developed into a more serious one or not 355 .While you bore her with the details of your soccer practice. “I just took a shower”). If you must describe making love. 2.There are things that you can tell a person you feel attraction for online that you cannot say to her face. Since you know that she’s also into you. It took all of my self control to prevent myself from just kissing you in a dark corner when we met for lunch” will convey the message that you appreciate her efforts to look her best. particularly if she’s feeling a bit naughty. casually mention that you’re wearing only boxers because the humidity is killing you (or my favorite. but the Start of Better Things You are still very. bit by bit. Sexy Phone Conversation . Saying something like “you really looked sexy today during class. Some studies have shown that good horror films can be more sexually arousing than romance or even porn. Because you’re friends. make her feel that her voice and the theme of your conversation are turning you progressively on. you are now free to continue a stronger friendship that will last for years and years to come. this could lead to more prolific things. 3. The basis of which is that fear results in the same biological effects as sexual arousal i. Once you overcome the sexual tension that’s been plaguing your relationship. Or better yet. This is because you feel protected from an extreme reaction by your monitor and the x-mark on top of your browser. Give her the power of seduction. do NOT mention another girl’s name. very good friends. Sex is not the End. ditch the romance movies and rent a thriller. say “when a girl kisses my ear…” or something similar. And for goodness’ sake. She already knows that you like her. while sharing yours.

First. Third. your place should provide some interesting conversation pieces for those visiting. sofa. Obviously if you are in high school or college your place is going to look a little different than someone out of college making $100.The Best of TSBMAG. A Guideline for keeping your place clean 1. Your place should serve a couple purposes. your place should provide an environment that makes the women feel insanely comfortable. If your floor has splashes of spaghetti sauce. tables. Second.000 a year. The most important areas are surfaces that are visible such as corners. Many times you will have someone you barely know back at your place. The more comfortable they feel at your place the more likely they will be to spend time there. you don’t want to overwhelm visitors with your personal taste. Although you want create an “at home feel” for yourself. Dust. you should feel comfortable there. One of the most important ways to make your place a comfortable place for both you and the women in your life to spend time at is to keep it clean. furnishing. or your counter is filled with grease… 356 . TV. Focus your dusting on everything that can be seen.COM Day 22 Preparing Your Bachelor Pad Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/11/2008 This lesson is going to be a guideline for some general rules when it comes to maintaining your place. Get rid of stains. 2. Your best self that is. While your choice of decor may change. The easiest way to relieve that tension is to have a bunch of interesting pictures. What your goal should be is for your place to be a reflection of yourself. or decor for them to comment on. the fundamentals will always stay the same. Stains just reek of low class. floors.

The other rooms I would recommend using candles. Keep the place stocked with toilet paper. It is important to get other people’s perspective on the smell of your place. or anything that would gross a girl out is gone. doesn’t necessarily look clean to them. and glass table. If you’ve been living with the smell for awhile chances are you won’t even notice it. The same can be said for mirrors and glass tables. This is often a spot you will find yourself at with a girl listening to music or watching a video clip. Wipe down windows. You never know what’s on there. You want to use this for your benefit and not against you. Windows are an easy thing to clean and will make the room appear much nicer when they don’t have dust and smudges reflecting off of them. I can’t tell you how many guys I know have messed things up with a girl by giving her the opportunity browse through his computer while he was in the shower. Bad smelling homes are immediately associated with dirty people. and most importantly… CLEAR YOUR BROWSING HISTORY ON YOUR COMPUTER. Remember. 4. Make sure the toilet bowl smells good and looks clean. You should have air fresheners for the kitchen and bathroom. If there is one area that girls will judge you the most on it's the way you keep your bathroom. Get rid of all hair in tub and sink. The last thing you want is a girl not coming over because she’s too grossed out to use the bathroom. mirrors. Clean your computer area. Keep the towels hanging nicely.Social Superstar get it up. Make sure your computer is dusted off. Your bathroom must be impeccable. If your couches have stains on them cover them with some kind of soft blanket. 5. The sense of smell is closely associated with arousal. what looks clean to us. your desk is in order. Make sure all stains and crud. A Guideline for keeping your place smelling good There is nothing that will turn a woman off quicker than walking into a place that smells like crap. Candles smell good and create a nice atmosphere. 3. It's always safe to constantly be clearing it. 357 .

Put your clothes away. pants. they should not be the most prominent items on display. This is so simple.The Best of TSBMAG. either throw them away or put them in the basement or garage. • Dirty sheets. I would usually recommend purchasing a dimmer that allows you to pull the lights up or down based on the mood. Don’t leave random stuff lying around. these need to be changed often. yet so many of us continue to leave shirts. 358 . sneakers lying all over our bedroom. Especially in the summer time. blankets. If there are items laying around that you no longer make use of. • • A Guideline for making your place more comfortable to women Lighting Lighting makes a huge difference in the appearance of your place.COM Below are some certain items you want to be aware of that may be contributing to a bad smell in your place. and pillows. Dump ashtrays regularly Take out the garbage daily Put gym gear in the laundry room Food remains should be wiped up immediately • • • • A Guideline for keeping the place neat and tidy • Get rid of all clutter. Decor This is the area where your personal taste sometimes has to be compromised a bit. While you want to reflect your personality you don’t want to look like The 40 Year old Virgin with rooms filled with toys. Lighting is one the most important elements of creating a good ambiance. While all of these items have a place in your home. It communicates that you are a disorganized person. movie posters. and sports memorabilia.

When a girl comes back to your place. I decided I wanted my place to have the feel of Buenos Aires. and when I found something I liked. Once I knew what style I was going for I began searching for items on Ebay and Amazon that would fit into the decor. Another good habit to get into is making your bed every morning. pictures. I also tend to keep a six pack in the fridge. Bedding It goes without saying that you want your bed to be inviting as possible. and window treatments online. I bought 90% of the framed art work. In the past I would try to go out and decorate my new place in a weekend. On that note. you want to make sure that your glasses and silverware are always clean. The best way to do this is to not cheap out on a good mattress.Social Superstar The best idea is to find a style that you like. Since a true player. it's always nice to be able to offer for her to join you in a glass a wine. This new strategy of decorating my place over the course of a couple months allowed me to search these sites. My old strategy caused me to purchase a lot of cheap items all at once. Making her a margarita is always a nice way to break the tension and enjoy a good drink. I painted the place with Latin colors and then slowly found items that complimented the room. It is a safe bet to always have a couple bottles of wine lying around. For me. I find the best way to shop for home decor is online. wall decorations. A fun thing to do is have some frozen cocktails on hand. he must always be prepared for an overnight guest. Beverages You always want to have either bottled or filtered water available. Entertainment and Props 359 . and then slowly decorate the place to match that style. purchase it as the money became available. never knows when he’ll be taking a new girl home. I found several magazine articles that celebrated the style of Buenos Aires and then I created a look around those. I would buy items as I could afford them. You always want to keep about four pillows on your bed. and stock a small bar with liquor. Once you have a good mattress purchase a nice comforter set to go along with it.

The Best of TSBMAG.COM

I mentioned earlier that your place should provide some interesting conversation pieces. This means that you should frame some “story worthy” photos and have them lying around. These photos will serve to demonstrate your personality as well as offer you a chance to tell some good stories. I mentioned yesterday how a good coffee table book can initiate conversation and break the tension of bringing a girl back your place. It's not a bad idea to keep some props lying around. Props include things like personality tests, interesting quizzes, this lie detector test, or other fun games. It's also not a bad idea to keep a stack of reliable DVDs lying around. These should be a good mix of romantic movies, comedies, and interesting documentaries. You never know what kind of mood the two of you will be in when you arrive at your place, and it's good to have a variety to choose from. Another good idea is to be constantly DVRing interesting things on TV. This allows you to always have something of value to throw on. An absolute great addition to your living room is Nintendo WII. This is a video game system that women finally seem to enjoy as much, if not more, than men. It's great because it can introduce some competitive flirting and offers a dynamic opportunity for Kino. This should all be a great guideline for you to transform your place into an excellent bachelor bad. Remember that the main purpose of your place is to have you and her feel comfortable and to provide some entertainment for the two of you.

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Social Superstar

Day 23 Quick Lesson in Kino
Written by The Dicknotist Originally Published: 07/14/2008

If you’re reading this, you’re probably looking for ways to obtain more sex in your life. Perhaps you want something more than just sex …or perhaps not. Either way, what separates true sex from porn is that the former involves touch whereas the latter is viewed through the pixels of a computer screen. Sex cannot happen without contact and neither can seduction. Too many guys make the mistake of focusing all their efforts on conversation and while your words may peak her interest, your touch is what will drive her wild with intense desire. From the moment a woman lays eyes on you, she’s unconsciously wondering how you’ll be in bed. Will you take charge as she surrenders her body to you or will you look to her on what to do? Will you be affectionate and attentive to her needs or will you just slam it in a few times and leave? Do you actually know what you’re doing in the bedroom or will she have to teach you like all the other guys? All of that is conveyed through your eye contact and touch. We’ve all read the now famous DiCarlo Escalation Ladder (DEL), which will give you the nuts and bolts of what to do, but not necessarily the mindset behind it. Guys who aren’t used to touching women will just lay their hands on her as if they’re in a video game. They earn five points for every time they brush her arm or tap her back. When I touch a woman, I don’t play for points; I play for pleasure. When I think of touch, I imagine that my hands are like paintbrushes plastering my emotions onto her body. Call me the Jackson Pollack of seduction: I paint her arms her arms and torso now so that I can sprinkle some more on her face later…with my other special brush. So, when first talking to a girl, I will often just lightly touch her outer arms and torso with my fingers as I’m talking to her. I see it as expressive: you touch her as you talk to emphasize important points. That touch is more subtle and friendly, aimed at just making her comfortable and more trusting. During high points in the interaction, however, your touch should become more appreciative. Touch serves two purposes: to emphasize what you’re saying to her and to appreciate her. An example of appreciation could be that in talking to
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her, she reveals that she works as a nurse. That immediately peaks your interest as your mom was a nurse and you realize the resiliency and compassion necessary for the job. Rather than just telling her how awesome that is, you should also touch her arm and hold it there a few seconds longer than usual and perhaps even stroke it. Expressive touch is like a period: light and quick. Appreciative touch is like an exclamation point, lasting a good 2-3 seconds. Yet the point isn’t for you to have this in your head while talking to a woman but to give you a context for which touch can amplify and supercharge your game. When you touch her, touch her as if you’re already making love to her. Cup your hand as you touch her back and cup the back of her shoulder blades. Don’t forget her sensitive spots, including her inner arms, behind her knees, the skin fold on the other side of her elbow. Later on in the interaction, touching her neck, ears, thighs, breasts will amplify her desire. Don’t be afraid to graze her breasts! Graze them now so you can glaze them later. You can get away with murder in the field as long as you are relaxed and slow down. Calibration is simply the act of doing things much more slowly, which includes walking, talking, and touching. You may be nervous, but if you can slow down your actions, you will be seen as confident and in control. Of course, touch is best demonstrated by viewing and trying it yourself. An excellent resource on touch is The Joy of Erotic Massage, which takes you through more than you’ll ever need to give women incredible pleasure with your touch from the first meet to sex. You can purchase a copy on Amazon, though you’ll probably be able to get it free through other means… I hope that when you read this essay and even see the video above, you will get some fresh ideas on how to use touch to build trust and sexual tension. Yet, to get the most out of any endeavor, you must go out and hit the field. Experiment and develop your own style. Innovation never comes from passively reading and watching. Like any man of character, you must act.

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Day 24 Body Language 202
Written by Dr. Fuji Originally Published: 07/15/2008

Body language is one of the most underrated, overlooked, and powerful elements in your social arsenal. The classic study on the elements of communication by Professor Albert Mehrabian (1971, “Silent Messages” Wadsworth, Belmont, California) found that nonverbal communication accounts for as much as 93% of all communication. Body language itself makes up more than half of that. So it should come as no surprise that what you say isn’t near as important as how and when you say it. In cold approach pick up, the individual who uses body language effectively often has significantly better results than his less-enlightened counterparts. In this article we’ll be delving into the use of body language to convey high value, how to show interest or disinterest non-verbally, and fixing common sticking points and pitfalls. Let’s begin. An interesting thing about body language is that it tends to override your verbal. In other words, people will believe your nonverbal communication more than even what you actually say. So if your verbally sub communicate high value but your non-verbal says the opposite, people will tend to trust the body language over the words. While seemingly counter-intuitive, the fact is most people tend to place more trust in forms of communication that are harder to consciously alter. We can lie with our words quite easily. Lying with our body language is much more difficult. Because your body language is so incredibly consistent, women especially have found that it’s generally a very effective way to evaluate others. And therein lays both the problem and the effectiveness of body language. It’s very difficult to change, but when you are successful, it conveys much more influence than other forms of communication. One of the most effective uses for body language is communicating value. We do this by consciously altering our behaviors and mannerisms from unattractive to attractive. Imagine two men, both of equal confidence, looks, attractiveness, and other factors. But one man makes eye contact when he speaks and the other looks away and fails to make eye contact. Who is more attractive? The objective is to sub363

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communicate through our body language that we are “high-value” (read: attractive) men. By “high-value,” we mean that we have high quantities of the social and evolutionary value to which people respond. A “highvalue” man is one who encompasses all of the qualities and mannerisms that women are hard-wired to find attractive. Think: confidence, leadership ability, power, attractiveness to other women, strength, internally validated, etc. There are three main body positions in most social situations which you can use to convey value: How you stand, how you walk/move, and how you sit. Although full body language overhauls are beyond the scope of this article, the fundamentals are quite simple. When you’re standing, you want to stand with your feet shoulder-width apart or slightly wider, shoulders pulled back, standing up straight, and chest somewhat out. Your weight should generally be towards the rear of your soles (closer to the heel) so that you always appear to be leaning back. It should not be an uncomfortable stance, but one which clearly does not lend itself to laziness. Picture the way a U.S. Marine would stand when at ease. Your stance should project confidence. Your hands should drape at your sides the way they naturally fall. Do not put your hands in your pockets or cross them over your chest. When you walk or move, the object is to convey dominance and purpose. Your hands should swing naturally at your sides while you walk but without looking either stiff or “floppy.” Practice this in the mirror if you suspect they are moving unnaturally. Walk at about 50% of your normal speed when in the venue. When you are moving towards something (a set, an exit, the bathrooms, etc), take the shortest route possible—usually a straight line. Instead of circling a set several times like a vulture, walk straight up with confidence. Similarly, when moving through the crowd, you want to project dominance. Oftentimes women notice you and the way you move or interact with people and they make judgments about you before you’ve even noticed them. Dominance is tough to put in text but it’s something we drill in our live boot camps. The objective is to be verbally polite while “guiding” people out of your way. Don’t be afraid to touch both men and women while you’re walking through a crowd. A hand gently on the triceps or back letting people know you’re coming through is a dominant, yet polite way of moving through the crowd and communicating that you expect people to move out of your way.

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When you sit, the objective is to take up space while appearing relaxed and comfortable. Don’t overdo ‘taking up space’ lest you come off as tryhard. What you want to communicate is that you do not make any apologies for your existence and that you are used to always being comfortable. It’s the same concept as locking in. Useful tactics to convey this include draping your arms over the backs of chairs or over the seatbacks of booths or couches. Your upper body should ideally be leaning back without hunching over. Feet and legs can be spread moderately or crossed ankle-to-knee. Sliding forward slightly in your seat will allow you to lean back even in a vertically-backed chair. The main communication here is that you are comfortable and confident. Do not cross your arms over your chest for this reason. The other thing that body language is extremely useful for is showing interest or disinterest nonverbally. Because women are so much better attuned to body language relative to men, they feel your nonverbal indicators of interest (IOIs) or disinterest (IODs) much more powerfully than we do as men. For example, facing a set or group is one way to nonverbally show interest. Conversely, facing away is a subtle show of disinterest. Other body language-based indicators of interest include: Leaning in, Kino escalation (escalating physical touch), strong eye contact, and cocking your head to the side. Indicators of disinterest include: leaning back, putting barriers between you and the set or group (especially in front of your midsection, e.g. arms crossed, drink in front of the chest, etc), not smiling, “body rocking”, and looking away. Note that some of these things can also be considered demonstrations of lower value so be cognizant of what you are communicating to people. The power in nonverbal IOIs and IODs are that they can be used both subtly and oftentimes with more impact than their verbal counterparts. For example, a nonverbal false time constraint (an IOD) is much more powerful than a verbal-only version. As we’ve discussed earlier, people tend to place more credibility on body language than verbal communication because of the difficulty involved in controlling it. The punishment-reward sub-dynamic is the underlying principle behind Mehow’s Chase Cycling™ model and is most effective when body language is used to both reward good behavior and punish bad behavior. A great example of this is during the first minute of the interaction. Sets generally don’t face you right off the opener. They’re usually facing each
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other. When you begin to hook the set, you can tell by their body language – they start to turn toward you. You can then nonverbally reward by more directly facing them or giving emotional value. If they give you IODs, you can punish by facing away and throwing a false time constraint (a verbal IOD). This psychologically conditions women to invest and to work for you. And as we all know, we value that which we work for. Finally, there are certain body language mistakes that the majority of guys find themselves making during their training. By being aware of these common sticking points, you’ll be better equipped to stop them before they become bad habits. Let’s examine a few of the most common: Leaning In: This is one of the most common sticking points most guys make. Leaning in is an instinctive body language move that you have to consciously change. The lower the set is (seated, lying down, shorter than you, etc.), the more you’ll feel the urge to lean in. Don’t do it. Have a wing observe you in set and let you know when you’re leaning in. Rewarding bad behavior: Directly and continually facing a set which is closed off and giving you IODs is rapport and acceptance-seeking. You are non-verbally rewarding the set for defiance. Instead, mirror a set’s body language IODs with your own. Take advantage of both false time constraints and body rocking to avoid continually facing a set that isn’t hooking. Lacking dominance: Everything you do in field should be done with confidence and dominance. From the initial approach, to Kino escalation, to simply walking through the crowd, your body language is communicating things about you. Dominant body language communicates confidence, pre-selection, and social proof. Fidgeting: Nervous ticks such as swaying from side to side, playing with your hands or fingers, moving around too much, or playing with your drink all tell the set and everyone around you that you are not only nervous around them, but that they are higher value and thus, you are emotionally reacting to them. The emotion of nervousness often manifests itself through these nervous behaviors. Eliminate them. You’ll notice a marked improvement in your interactions. Drink shield: This is another common sticking point the majority of men have. The “drink shield” is when people hold their drink in front of their chest in a social environment. The sub communication behind this body language tick is that you’re nervous and uneasy. So your instinctive reaction is to cover your midsection (traditionally the most vulnerable
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Hands in pockets: This behavior also communicates that you’re nervous and that you feel awkward. and relaxation with your body language. you’ll start to automatically relax more in social situations. In this case it’s the drink. Fix these behaviors and you’ll see a significant improvement in your game and in your own state. but these are the absolute most common ones. The human brain is constantly reacting to stimuli from the sensory system.tv. your body too affects the mind. You don’t know what to do with your hands so you shove them in your pockets. Information on our live programs can be found at www. Force yourself to relax and let your arms just fall. there’s dozens more sticking points many guys will experience. Instead. See you all in the field.mehow.com. We cover body language much more in depth in our live programs and boot camps and also in Mehow’s esteemed Get the Girl!™ Manual available at www. And it’s the basis behind parents telling their children not to cross their arms or frown. This is why faking a smile for an extended period of time often makes us feel better on the inside as well. Of course. and body language is no exception. One interesting side effect of good body language is that it not only affects your interactions but your psychology as well. we’ve examined some of the most common sticking points and come up with solutions and fixes to remedy them. DJ Fuji Chief Instructor 367 . You are trying to convey abundance. but to also convey interest or disinterest without opening our mouths.mehowgetthegirl. Instead. At the beginning you’ll have to force this.Social Superstar spot on most mammals) with some sort of protection. We’ve learned that not only does it allow us to show value. Hopefully this article has been able to shed some light on the importance of body language as a whole. let them hang naturally by your sides. Just as your mind affects the body. but after some practice. And of course. hold your drink down by your hip and don’t cross your arms or take a protective stance. security. Your physiology often has a significant effect on your psychology.

If you’ve found yourself too often getting stuck in the friend zone. Even if some of their reckless behavior will never suit your personality. Feel the fear. So instead of trying to learn from these “jerks” whom we weren’t alpha enough to hang with. while we were getting stuck in the friend zone. you’ve probably often asked yourself “why all girls like the assholes?” or “How come the jerks get all the girls?” This is not so say that being a bad boy makes you an asshole or a jerk. Most of our fears are completely unwarranted. it’s time to MAN up! There is plenty that can be learned from these bad boys. it is simply because that is the vibe that you’ve been sending off. We are held back by our fear of losing our job.COM Day 25 Being the Bad Boy Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/16/2008 You probably noticed as far back as grade school. Most people are held back by various forms of fear. The Bad Boy trait you should emulate 1. that girls are attracted to guys who possess a bit of that bad boy persona. You want to shed your “nice guy” image? It is impossible to try to imitate specific bad boy behavior. our fear of being laughed at. live a fearless existence. our fear of going 368 . and create an acceptable excuse for ourselves. then do it anyway. In fact. if you’re like most us. you can try adopting some of their character traits to increase your attractiveness. put yourself in their mindset. If you want to stand out in a crowd. Instead. The reason most of us viewed these guys as assholes or jerks is simply because we were jealous and envious that these guys were always dating the girls that we wanted.The Best of TSBMAG. “women only like the assholes. Live life through their eyes.” Well boys. Most people suffer some form of anxiety disorder. Most fear stems from our need for approval. It will come across forced and insincere. we found it easier to blame society for our lack of success with women. You’re fearless. Most people are insecure.

Social Superstar broke. Do you want to call out of work and go the beach? Do it! Do you want to tell the counter girl at the bank that she’s sexy as hell? Do it! Do you want to finally change the style of your haircut? Jump out a plane? Get a tattoo? Have sex with a stranger? Do whatever the fuck you want! Whenever the fuck you want! Do this for just 2 days and experience the thrill of being fearless. 369 . How refreshing is it when we meet someone who isn’t controlled by these fears? Women are attracted to bad boys. or whatever other insignificant. have given up our dreams… because we are afraid of making the wrong decision.” do exactly what you want to do. our fear of ruining our reputation. My challenge to you Live the next two days of your life completely fearless. Because they can sit and talk and wallow in their fears and insecurities together. In the average guy. say what you feel like saying. most of our major fears are solely based on what thoughts someone else will have about us. And she gets addicted to it. tell someone who has pissed you off to “fuck off. trivial reason is holding you back. because bad boys provide an adrenaline rush that the average guy does not. In fact. lonely or in a shitty relationship. or how you appear. a woman sees a reflection of most of her fears and insecurities. our fear of making a mistake. This is why the average guy becomes her friend. After the two days you can go back to worrying about what people think. our fear of rejection. What would your personality be like if you weren’t governed by all of these fears? If you take a look at the short list of our major fears… you’ll find that not one of them is life threatening. He takes her into his fearless existence. approach who you feel like approaching. Just for the next two days. The bad boy makes her forget all about her fears and insecurities. Most of us are working a job we hate. How ridiculous does that sound when you really think about it? 90% of the decisions that you make are influenced by your need for approval. and we’re not even afraid of the consequences of the wrong decision… We are afraid of what people will say about us… what people will think about us.

” If you feel that you need to incorporate more bad boy traits into your persona I highly recommend listening to our How to Be the Bad Boy Women Want podcast.COM More information on being the bad boy In our most recent podcast we went over an entire list of ways you can take on more of the bad boy attitude.com/2008/07/13/how-to-be-the-bad-boy-womenwant/ 370 . showing how a bad boy would react as opposed to the typical “nice guy. http://www.tsbmag.The Best of TSBMAG. We even went into specific examples.

The whole goal is to make her wonder what is going on in your life that you no longer have time for her. and the confusion will cause her to spend more time thinking about you. A great way to do this is to call her and ask her to hang out. She can never feel like you’re bragging. Wait a day or two before getting back to her. texts. This means cut off phone calls. When she contacts you… don’t answer the phone call. text messages. What you are doing here is confusing her. Bobby’s Step by Step Plan The first thing that you need to do is effectively disappear from your friend’s life. Vagueness is the key to this part. emails. This is a fine line that you have to be careful as you walk.Social Superstar Day 26 How to Turn a Female Friend into Your Girlfriend (Part 1) Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/18/2008 For the sake of this lesson I am going to make a couple assumptions. When you do talk to her be pleasant. Although you will be vague. but brief and vague. and communicate often through phone. Now you need to amplify the jealousy and confusion. I am going to assume that the female friend you’re interested in has firmly placed you in the friend zone. text or email immediately. Her simply missing you will not be enough to stir up immense attraction for you. This is to be done without making her feel like you’re mad at her. You should spend at least one month apart. or MySpace/Facebook. First. This means you spend a reasonable amount of time with her. Assuming enough time has 371 . and visits. The better friends you are with this girl. the longer this process should go on. I will also assume that you are actually friends with her and not just an acquaintance. or lying… The whole attitude should be that really great things are going on in your life… but you’re holding back from telling her because you don’t want to make her feel bad. trying to make her jealous. you should always be implying that really great things are going on in your life. While you’re gone you also need to arouse some jealously on her part.

In the meantime. Once again.The Best of TSBMAG. If you’re scrawny… join a gym and follow a good plan for bulking up. she will be relieved that you finally called… and her jealousy and confusion will dwindle… Just when she thinks things are going back to the status quo. Many times guys fall for their female friend because she is the only girl in their life. Assuming that the both of you are active on at least one social networking site like MySpace or Facebook. If there are physical areas of you that need improvement. flirting. During your time away from her you also need to be working on your social skills. If you’re over weight. It is important that you change up your profile a bit. The confidence you will gain through your improvements will radiate throughout you. The entire time that you’re away from her you need to be working on yourself. It is crucial that after her long time away from you. cancel the plans with her. When you cancel don’t schedule a new date. do everything you possibly can to get to your ideal weight. be vague.) To go even further I would recommend getting a bunch of attractive girls to leave comments on your page.. Basically you want to do everything I outlined in day 3 about updating your look. Race and Kelly give a great way to go about getting these comments. Your 372 . another great way to create jealousy is to take advantage of social networking sites. You need to be filling your days with the most exciting. now is the time to get serious about change. challenging. and building attraction with as many girls as you can. add some new cool pictures (preferably with some hot girls. You should be out talking. and personally rewarding events imaginable. You should be doing everything you can to take your mind off of her. Improving your social skills serves many purposes. Once these guys go out and meet some new girls they realize that there is an abundance of women and no longer cling to this one girl the way they used to. You should be hitting on other girls with reckless abandon. The other benefit of improving your social skills will be that it will naturally make you more attractive to your friend. you can bet she will be checking out your profile to see what’s going on in your life.COM gone. Above everything else. You should not spend all of your time away from her thinking about her and planning your next move. it gives you a chance to see if you really want this girl to be your girlfriend.. that when she finally sees you again there is a very noticeable improvement in your appearance.

as I truly believed it is what finally allowed me to turn a friend of five years into a lover a couple years back. 373 . or wardrobe. This is the end of today’s lesson. how you will break rapport. and go for the kiss. or just referring to her as my girlfriend was so foreign to me that it scared me senseless. The final benefit of improving your social skills immensely while you’re away from your female friend is because you’ll find it so much easier to create the confusion and jealousy that you’re aiming for. amplify attraction. If you’re avoiding her phone calls and breaking plans with her. This final exercise is so important because you have to train your brain to experience the new reality. and then supplemented it with the visualizations… and I truly believe that without the visualizations I would not have been able to succeed with the plan. If you want to learn more about visualizations re-read lesson one. my brain resisted out of fear. Hold the vision in your mind and feel all of the feelings associated with it. Every morning upon waking and every evening before you go to bed. While I’ve stressed that during your time away from your friend you should put her out of your mind as much as possible. The final thing you need to be doing relates strongly to lesson 1 which dealt with designing your life. or holding her hand. You will also be fine tuning your flirting skills which you will need later on when you start hanging out with your friend again. there is one exception to that. As much as I wanted it. I swear by this. I followed the entire plan outlined above. The idea of lying in bed with her. I don’t mean visualize the act of sex… I want you to visualize what it will be like after your first kiss. This will come into play in part two when I discuss finally meeting up with her again. haircut. Part two will deal with how you will act when you finally meet up with your friend again. I found the biggest factor that used to hold me back from making a move on my friend was that I could not imagine the outcome.Social Superstar new found confidence will probably impress her more than your new body. you need to spend fifteen minutes visualizing yourself with your friend as lovers. it is much more powerful if it's because you really do have better plans and more options. Experience the feeling of sitting next to her having moved past the friend zone.

COM Day 27 How to Get Your Female Friend into Bed Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/21/2008 If you are serious and strict about following the plan I laid out in part one of turning a friend into a lover then you will have built up an ample amount of tension and anticipation.The Best of TSBMAG. but do not immediately run to her side. If not. Let her feel a little awkward and uncomfortable for awhile. I would maintain nothing more than a good buzz throughout the night. 374 . When you finally decide to hang out with your friend again you need to invite her to an event that is on your terms. club. Once you’ve established a meeting point (bar. The goal of this first meeting is to display the “new” you in action. Let's talk about how to capitalize on this built up anticipation. You are to acknowledge her. How many times has she done that to you? I just want to add something in: Do not get too drunk. During this evening you should be bouncing back and forth between your friend and the other girls in the location. It is critical that you immediately capitalize on this built up tension. I don’t care if you have to open every set in the bar… find one that sticks. You can easily ruin everything you’ve been working for by losing control of yourself and saying or doing the wrong thing. It is important that you spend this time building sexual tension through teasing her and using Kino. For the short intervals that you spend with your friend the conversation should only consist of light and flirtatious talk. you need to begin making new friends immediately. When your female friend arrives it is critical that you’re already engaged in some conversation with attractive women. party) you need to arrive there early. Hopefully you’ll have invited some other girls you know as well. If you haven’t brought girls with you. Once you get to the location you need to establish yourself as the social charming guy of the evening. When your friend finally arrives you should be talking to some girls. It is extremely easy to slip back into the status quo if you drop your guard. This means inviting her to a party you’re hosting or a night out with you and your friends. then you need to be an opening machine.

You also need to be sure to break rapport. You need to take control of the frame and subtly let her know that you’re calling the shots now. If you’ve followed everything correctly you should have built up some strong attraction. use an excuse). as the tension is mounting. your goal isn’t to offend your friend or be mean… your goal is to build attraction. I’ve found it is almost always most effective to swing for the fences the first night. If she starts talking about some guy she’s dating-change the subject at the first chance you get. put your arm around her. If you’re going to go for it all you need to be rapidly escalating Kino. tell her you going to get a drink and go talk to another girl. This is something that you’re going to have to feel out. Later in the night. Once you’re alone with her you have to be sure to keep the sexual tension alive. and friends don’t. Or better yet. Some girls may not be game for making out in the club… in this case you need to find away to get her alone. Her emotions are going to be peaked by mid way through the night. You’ll need to use a combination of these touches to shift out of the friend zone. Remember. As the night gets later you have to make a decision. This should go without saying. You have to decide if you’re going to shoot for the fences with your friend. Sexual escalation is more effective because it is less ambiguous: hold her hand (use an excuse of looking at her rings or bracelets or nails if you need to). 375 . Everything should be happening without mention of the paradigm shift. but I’ll say it anyway… never verbally acknowledge any of this.Social Superstar The time that you spend with her you need to be quickly escalating the Kino. or touch her ear to comment on her earring. These things are things that lovers do. Personally. Now it's just a matter of letting her know it's alright to embrace this attraction. or grab her hand to look at her ring. This means tease her with a gentle push. touch her hair (likewise. She will be feeling attraction towards you. or if you’re going to end the night leaving her wanting more. the best way to break rapport is with physical contact. If she starts talking about something that is not cooperating with the mood… break rapport again.. She will most likely try to suck you into talking about the same old status quo topics the two of you always discussed..

You should look at her like you want her. You need to act in a seductive manner. If you find at the end of this second night that she still isn’t receptive to being kissed… move on. flirt. This evening you must treat the same way as the previous evening. initiate Kino. and build attraction. Look at her lips and leave pauses where you just look at each other. The next time you hang out with her it can be alone... tease. smile. Give it one more chance. If she’s comfortable with that or looks at you in a seductive fashion it's on..COM It won’t be enough to just tease her and escalate Kino.The Best of TSBMAG. If you find she is being completely unreceptive to your advances… then let the evening die down with you in control. then put your phone back in your pocket. You need to prompt these thoughts by: • • • • You need to hold strong eye contact. then close out the evening talking to other girls and part ways with your friend.. But if possible. arrange for some friends to send periodic text messages to peak her interest. You need to break rapport. Simply look at the texts. If you sense you need to build more attraction. You should slow down your speech and deepen your voice. 376 . If you’ve decided to hold off to another night to go for the kiss… I suggest making a deal with yourself. Go in for the kiss. You have to encourage her to have sexual thoughts about you.

It’s not that it can’t be fixed. be it monogamous. buy a drink. while sad this can be prevented. I am not a guru. To give credit so I don’t step on any toes or get a lawsuit thrown at me. You only have a set amount of time. I’m not reinventing the wheel here. these are just guidelines I’ve been taught and implemented that have worked wonders. good luck with that. If you think I’m joking head to the mall on a Saturday afternoon. it just takes a hell of a lot of time to do it (and this goes double for friends or ex-girlfriends who already know you). but the stuff below is golden. most of these are Sebastian Drake’s concepts. The marriage lasted six months until he finally flipped. these are not my ideas. Honeymoon was great. Should put a little perspective on the divorce rate in this country. If you decide one day you’re going to break the mold with a girl you’ve been seeing the vase cracks…yeah. Here’s a true story. then sit down and watch couples interact. Chase Originally Published: 07/22/2008 I’m guessing since I’m getting married in September (let’s see how that goes) is why I was asked to write about managing a relationship for the 31 days series. everything was normal. One of my good friends got married a while back. Guys.Social Superstar Day 28 Managing a Relationship Written by M. or just a fuck buddy hopefully you can pick something up from this. 377 . there it is and good luck changing it. He was GIVEN a $20 allowance per week with the money he earned. maybe two months to make things how you want them to be. If you are interested in a relationship. Then she quit her job and took over the finances. We’re all creatures of habit. Apologies in advance for the long post. MLTR. The Vase Concept This is the best analogy I’ve heard…relationships are like a vase…clay and water getting molded together on a wheel. Here we go… Let’s be blunt here…when women get complacent in a relationship they tend to treat their guy like shit. It’s a mind-blowing experience to watch how some guys get treated in public…and they put up with it. Once the vase gets thrown into the oven and hardened.

Don’t get the wrong impression that you should never compromise. The moment you get fed up the precedent has been broken and the vase cracks. Again. if I’m into a woman and looking for a MLTR. I’m surprised this isn’t addressed more in the community. Frankly.” You can use a variation of this for any trait you’re looking for. You simply have to. Would you drop an f-bomb in front of your grandmother? I know I wouldn’t have. Getting someone to admit to something you want wins the battle…if they renege on it later you can bust them on it. This is just psych 101. This was so far out of my reality I thought it was a joke…it 378 . We all get caught up in the moment when we’re with a new girl we like. Can’t say I’m exactly thrilled with the changes (I’m now a plant owner) but it’s something I can live with. This is very powerful in the seduction phase. Let me ask a question. people act like they are expected to. Never. I’ll drop something like “look at all the women in this place that need a man to hold their hand…please tell me you’re not like that. fancy dinners.The Best of TSBMAG. People tend to live up to what they’ve admitted to. Draw the Battle-Lines Probably the best advice I’ve ever gotten. Set Expectations Guys. Ashlyn just moved into my place and did some redecorating. The real question is what you’re willing to compromise on. singing karaoke.COM Precedence is absolutely key. If she asks you to do something. but you can nudge them in certain directions. Do you act the same way around your best friend that you would around your boss? Now what you should ask yourself is why? The same thing goes for relationships. DO NOT do it from day one. This is also very good for compliance. doing the laundry…whatever). If she disagrees on a trait you’re looking for it’s up to you if you want to pursue it. good luck with that. Something in our heads wants to make her happy and seek approval. Gentleman. You can’t exactly change someone’s personality. For example. If she’s into you she’ll agree with pretty much anything you say unless it’s way out of her personality. and this can be anything you seriously don’t want to do (going to plays. If this will piss you off a couple of months from now don’t start the cycle. even if I have to water the damn things. Everyone acts differently around different people. draw the battlelines.

Chase II 379 . We all do it. In the seduction context make a list of what will make you happy in a relationship.Social Superstar wasn’t. Now push it forward. A loyal girl. If anything I hope you guys got something out of this. I’m trying to remember how this went. sex 4 times a week…etc. M. something along the lines of “can we just have sex tonight instead of you doing me anal on the balcony”…fucking hilarious. bj every day. If you set your expectations farther than what you really need you’ll always be in the clear when problems come up that have to be worked out. Whatever you really want. When women get pissed they will push you to see what they can get away with.

Explore every area of her body until she is practically begging for it. Most girls really enjoy receiving oral sex… learn to read the signs she is giving you and get her pussy gushing from the oral. That is true sexual power. In this lesson I want to give you guys some tips for improving this area of your life. Sexual options with women stems from building up a network of women who love having sex with you..The Best of TSBMAG.COM Day 29 Tips for Getting Better in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/21/2008 If you want to have the ability to call a girl up every night of the week for a late night booty call. if you don’t perform in the bedroom you will never be able to create a life of unlimited options. I recently wrote a post about becoming a better lover where I discussed the art of reading the signs that a woman is giving you and continuing to push her in that direction. Use your hands and mouth to create intense sexual tension. Women who still want to sleep with you even after they realize that you’re not boyfriend material. You need to be able to recognize what a woman is enjoying. simply because you mirrored her style. You’ll need to increase your stamina. This starts with the kiss. If she is a slow passionate kisser. Above all this is the number one trait of a good lover.. You need to make her feel like you know her inside and out. She’ll walk away thinking you were the best kisser in the world. Increase your stamina and last longer by focusing on 380 . Even if she knows you’re a player. she has to feel an intense sexual connection with you. slow your style down so your tongues mesh together. If you want a mind blowing sexual session it has to last more than ten minutes. If you know you’ve got a habit of finishing quickly than make sure you extend the foreplay. It doesn’t matter how great of a pick-up artist you are. But even after some powerful foreplay you need to follow up an even more powerful lay. You need to tailor everything to the girl you’re having sex with at this particular moment. you need to be good in bed. If she’s an aggressive and dominant kisser… sit back and follow her lead.

More tips to be a better lover 1. Smell Good. If you’re clueless about the G-spot read an article about how to find the g-spot 381 . 4. using breathing patterns. 3.Social Superstar pleasing her rather than how good you feel. Give a good massage. 5. use positions that you’re less likely to finish with. Wearing nice smelling cologne can intensify the sexual desire she feels for you. Everything listed above are the fundamentals needed to become a better lover. The more you take care of your body the more likely she’ll be inclined to want to give you oral sex. 2. Shave. Below I’ve listed some general tips to improve the overall experience. Groom Yourself. Aim for the G-spot. But having an idea of where it is and how to hit it will increase your likely hood of making her cum. You also want to build up your energy level as well as increasing your testosterone level which will only fuel your fire in the bedroom. Having a little knowledge of some sexually erotic zones of a woman’s body will go a long way. Just a small spray is best… or go for that just out of the shower smell. and by practicing. Watch a video on giving an erotic hand massage or a video on giving a foot massage. Don’t obsess about the g-spot. Having stubble on your face can irritate her and make things like kissing and oral sex a lot less pleasurable for her.

The irony of this is that you will probably find it is more difficult to end it with a girl than it was to get her. It is never easy to end things with a girl… and every situation will be different. and pray that things will roll along at the status quo. 382 .The Best of TSBMAG. when I finally had the balls to end it. now I’ve learned to love when a girl asks me one those questions… because I’ve learned to just be honest with her. Eventually you are bound to hear one of these 3 evil questions: 1.” Well. Where do we stand? 2. Where is this going? If you’ve been dating a girl that you have no intention of making your girlfriend… than you need to change the way you view these 3 questions. Now that you’re out meeting and dating a variety of girls you’ll quickly find that you won’t be on the same page as most of them. was when months later. This is because while you may view her as “practice” or “fun for the moment” or “somewhere to dump your load” she may have completely other thoughts running through her mind in regards to what the two of you have together.COM Day 30 Ending a Fling or Relationship Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/23/2008 There comes a time in every player’s life where he is forced to end relations with a female he no longer enjoys spending time with. I hated the way I had to lie or change topics or be extremely vague with my answer. And what I hated more. I used to fear it. the harder it will be. I used to hate when a girl asked me one of these questions. The longer you wait to end it. But there is one constant rule that does not change. What is this? 3. the girl would throw it in my face how I should have just been honest with her back when she asked “where this was going.

In yesterday’s lesson I talked about how if you’re really good in the bedroom you can usually keep sleeping with girls long after they’ve realized that you’re not going to be their boyfriend. But you’ll find that if you continually are honest with yourself and others your life will be a lot less complicated. If you lead a girl on for six months and then tell her that you don’t have feelings for her other than sexual. You need to crush that hope.. I wrote a post awhile back called Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along where I talked about the negative effect stringing a girl along has on your personality. If she doesn’t feel it's for real than she will be filled with hope that you will get back together. The minute you free yourself up from one girl. Many guys will continue dating a girl they have no feelings for simply because they are scared to be single or unable to give up the steady sex. She will respect you for your honesty. This is why you should use the opportunity most girls will present you with and come clean and be honest with them. Tell her why. She can’t have those two years back. This is not the mentality that a true player should have. The right decision may not always be the easiest. it will be a lot harder to make the transition. The more you try to sugar coat a break up the less likely she will feel the break up is for real. The longer you date a girl you have no real feelings for the more resentment will grow inside of you. In that case she doesn’t give you an out. If a girl asks you “where this is headed” and you don’t see it turning into a long term relationship. You will 383 .. There is an abundance of women available. If you let her know this after a few weeks than it is more likely she will keep you on the side as a booty call. As hard as it may seem to tell a girl you don’t love her or don’t want a relationship with her.Social Superstar When a girl doesn’t ask “what is this” and lets thing go along like everything is fine… that is when it is exceptionally hard to end it. Ultimately it is all about living with integrity. The secret to ending a relationship is honesty. This is a lot harder than it seems. tell her. you’ll be amazed at how quickly more will flow into your life. But this needs to be established as soon as possible. That resentment is unhealthy for your soul. I know that sounds mean. this will actually allow her to move on and get over you. But it is a lot meaner to let a girl waste two years hoping that you’ll finally see the light and be what she wanted. and you have to be the one to address the situation.

384 .COM also find that you feel better about yourself.The Best of TSBMAG. and your sense of self worth will increase.

relationships? What resources and assets do you have at your disposal? What do you do better than anyone else? 3. As a result you’ll want to have done Day 1’s task . A SWOT analysis is a strategic tool that has been used for many years in business (and many other fields) to look at the Strengths. Your task today is to run a SWOT Analysis on yourself. Define Your Mission and Goals Before you carry out your SWOT it’s important that you know what your goals are (otherwise the exercise is a little pointless as you’ve got nothing to review yourself based upon). Opportunities and Threats that that business might have or be facing. pua. dating. List Your Weaknesses What attributes do you have that are holding you back from achieving your goals? What skills do you not have as a successful player. List Your Opportunities Where is opportunity presenting itself? Is there a local club/group that you can join? Is there a girl just dying for you to make your move? Did an old fling show up back in your life? Did a new girl move in the 385 . List Your Strengths What attributes do you have that will help you to achieve your goals? What do you have going for you? What are your strong points with approaching. Much has been written about SWOT analysis and how to carry it out (I’ll let you do some searches on Google for it if you’re not familiar with it) however let me write a brief description of how to apply it to yourself. 2. Weaknesses.Social Superstar Day 31 Run a SWOT Analysis on Your Self Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/25/2008 Today is the last day in the 31 Days to Better Game series and as a result I want to make your last task a little reflective and forward looking.Designing Your Life. or alpha male? What is ‘broken’ on your game? What could or should you improve about yourself? What should you probably avoid in your gaming? What is distracting you from your goals? 4. 1.

Working out how to turn Weaknesses into Strengths and Threats into Opportunities is the key part of a SWOT analyses. Weaknesses. 6. Have you ever done one on yourself? 386 .‘doing the analysis of Strengths.Think of Strengths and Weaknesses as internal factors while Opportunities and Threats are external factors. Analyze Your Reflections and Generate Strategies Take some time out to work out what you can do with your findings. this website and on my overarching business also.The Best of TSBMAG. 7. How can you utilize your Strengths? How can you bring your Weaknesses to an end? How can you make the most of your Opportunities? How can you fend off the Threats? An old Marketing lecturer used to say . Doing a SWOT analysis is something that I do periodically on myself. Opportunities and Threats is only half the job.COM apartment across the hall? A part time job you should get to meet new people? 5. Plan to Do Something and Do It Translate your findings into an Action Plan and begin to implement it. List Your Threats What external things could or area is hindering you achieving your goals? Are you working too much and therefore coming home too tired to game? Do you not have enough money to go out to bars or clubs very often? Note .

com/booty-call/ Our Video Library We created a video library and filled it with the best of dating advice.tsbmag. http://www. We've also had the opportunity to interview many of the top dating coaches. For those of you who have never had the experience of playing the game.com/category/weekly-podcasts/ Booty Call Game For those who loved the old Romp. online dating.com/category/video-posts/ 387 . live pickups. and funny clips.com. confidence building.tsbmag. you absolutely must give it a shot.000 in downloads.Social Superstar The Index Other things that have helped make TSB Magazine grow: Our Famous podcasts We have produced many podcasts that have totaled over 100.tsbmag. http://www. and sex. http://www. You can download all of our podcasts by visiting the link below. relationships.com Booty Call flash game. The topics varied from dating. they were happy to find that it relocated to TSB Magazine.

and to provide invaluable suggestions. 388 .COM Acknowledgements We would like to take the time to thank all of our loyal readers who have stuck by us over the years. and Pete. You are an honorary inductee into the TSB Magazine Hall of Fame. and your effort and contribution do not go unnoticed.The Best of TSBMAG. And forever a friend to Bobby. Very Special Thanks We would like to issue a special thanks and acknowledgement to long time reader Morgan Chase. Mike. Many of the long time readers of TSB remember him for his frequent commenting and patrol of the chat box. You have been there to keep us on track. as you have gone above and beyond. We want to thank you for all the support you've shown us. We want you to know that we truly appreciate your support and encouragement and look forward to continuing to provide you with high quality content.

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