Social Superstar

First Published in Paperback 2008 By Sumi Books
Text Copyright: Anthony Almeida 2008 The moral right of the author has been asserted. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission in writing of the publisher, except by a reviewer who wishes to quote brief passages in connection with a review written for insertion in a newspaper, magazine, or broadcast. A catalogue record is for this book is available from the US Library Design and Typeset by Jeffrey Posner Printed and bound by Lulu Cover picture used with permission from the author. ISBN: Every reasonable effort has been made to acknowledge the ownership of copyright material included in this book. Any errors that have inadvertently occurred will be corrected in subsequent editions provided notification is sent to the publisher. Walden Books NY8, NY


The Best of TSBMAG.COM

SOCIAL SUPERSTAR: Best of TSB Magazine Vol. 1 Table of Contents
Introduction Part 1: The Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript Part 2: The Best of TSB Magazine Section One: The Dating Articles 5 Keys to Playing the Role of Being Wanted 10 Lessons for Successfully Hooking Up Emulate a Celebrity for Instant Rapport Using an Opinion Opener to Initiate Conversation Being Comfortable Talking Dirty 10 Ways a Girl Can Keep a Guy Like Me Keeping Cool and Plowing On How to Talk to Younger Women Going Caveman on Women Never Show Emotion When She Walks Away 5 Tips for Lasting Longer in Bed How to Get Better in Bed Having Trouble Getting Hard Wimps into Winners Ultimate MySpace Jealousy Tool Aim Lower PUA Openers, Openers, Openers How to Calm Your Sexual Neediness Are You the Man or Just the Fan? 107 109 113 115 118 120 123 125 127 129 131 133 135 140 145 146 147 150 151 9 106

Section Two: The Inner Game Articles The Hero, the Bounty, and the Purpose Driven Life


Social Superstar

Integrity Makes a Man The Great Gatsby Complex Build it, and They Will Come Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along The Anatomy of the Sickness Living with Passion 7 Secrets for Getting Out of a Slump Can You Control Your Emotions Like Arod Going Down in Flames Bust Through Your Comfort Zone

159 162 166 169 171 175 177 180 182 185

Section Three: Alpha Living Articles 10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive 3 Tips for Abs of Steel A Manly Guide to Choosing Your Drink 7 Steps to Naturally Boost Your Testosterone How to Naturally Increase Energy How to Redo Your Wardrobe Winning the Day 1 College Roommate Wars 187 191 194 197 199 203 213

Section Four: The Stories The Buenos Aires Hooker Juice Incident Fortaleza Nights (Part 1) Fortaleza Nights (Part 2) Ten Years After I Took Her Virginity My First Piece of MySpace Pussy The Return of a Pickup Artist (Part 2) 216 222 226 229 233 240

The Best of TSBMAG.COM

Snowballed Hotel Room High The Early Days: Experimenting With Speed Seduction The Falling in Love Pattern Don’t Buy the Cheap Sex Toys The Drunken Night in Medellin Story

247 249 253 257 260 264

Section Five: 31 Days to Better Game Day 1: Designing Your Life Day 2: Developing Inner Game Day 3: Updating Your Look Day 4: Always be Advertising Day 5: Being High Status Day 6: How to be a Good Flirt Day 7: Approaching and Opening Women Day 8: Improving Conversation Skills Day 9: How to Build Comfort Day 10: Being Funnier… Day 11: Push Pull/Cocky Funny Day 12: Body Language 101 Day 13: Building Your Social Circle Day 14: How to Properly Tease a Woman Day 15: Creating a MySpace and Facebook Profile Day 16: Tips for Flirting Online Day 17: Phone Game Strategy Day 18: Text Game for the PUA Day 19: How to Go on First Dates Day 20: How to Get a Day Two

270 273 276 278 280 285 290 292 296 302 304 313 317 318 324 334 338 343 347 350

Social Superstar

Day 21: Building Sexual Tension Day 22: Preparing Your Bachelor Pad Day 23: Quick Lesson in Kino Day 24: Body Language 202 Day 25: Being the Badboy Day 26: Friend into Lover (part 1) Day 27: Friend into Lover (part 2) Day 28: Managing a Relationship Day 29: Tips for Getting Better in Bed Day 30: Ending a Fling or Relationship Day 31: Perform a SWOT Analysis on Yourself Index

354 356 361 363 368 371 374 377 380 382 385 387


The Best of TSBMAG.COM Dedicated to Morgan Chase II

This book is five years in the making! Who was there for the red and black days? For those that just came on board recently, the red and black days refers to the early days of TSB when it had a blood red header with a black background and white text. And Mike and I thought the site looked hot. Putting this book together brought back many memories. I had to search through over 1,500 articles to choose the very best. The evolution of the site, in a way, represents the evolution of both the life of me, and the life of Michael Stoute. We wanted to make this book a diverse look at the four years leading up to its publication. Instead of focusing solely on dating articles, stories, or self help type articles, we chose to break the book up into six parts. These six parts are a great representation of TSB Magazine, as well as Bobby Rio and Michael Stoute- the men behind the magazine. Another reason we chose to break the book up into four parts is because we think you will get more value of it that way. There are articles in here that will help you with all aspects of your life. For instance, if you bought this book for the pickup advice, you might be pleasantly surprised in six months to read some articles about fitness, fashion, or inner game, you may have missed earlier when you ‘re were concentrating solely on devouring all things pickup. The six parts of this book are as follows: Part 1: The Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript This is our never before released manuscript for becoming a social superstar. This manuscript was first created over 10 years ago. Over the past 10 years it has been tested and refined. This contains everything you need to know to climb to the top of any social ladder. Part 2: The Best of TSB Magazine

The Essential Dating Articles

Social Superstar

Going through our huge library of dating, pickup, relationship and sex articles, I found it tough to choose “the best” so I decided to choose articles that give you a well rounded approach to improving your dating life. Most of these articles came out Mike’s and my own personal experience of improving our dating life. It wasn’t a quick and easy ride for either one of us… we hope that these articles will make your ride a little less bumpy.

The Inner Game Articles
These are some of the articles that mean the most to me. Through the many phases I’ve gone through as a person during the five years we were creating this magazine… these articles resonate with every period. The topics transcend dating advice, as the entire core principles can be applied to any area of your life, and I am confident you’ll see a marked improvement. This section is also the most timeless… as long after the days you are married with children… I hope that you still pick up this section of the book and reread some of these articles and find inspiration from them.

The Alpha Living Articles
Like the Inner Game articles I chose to include these Alpha Living articles because they too, are timeless. These are articles that you can read when you’re a sixty year old man, and still learn something from. Whether you’re interested in getting in shape, maximizing your energy, or just learning the art of ordering a man’s drink in the bar… you’ll find the information in this section. Alpha Living is a way of life that you’ll hopefully continue throughout your lifetime. It is about fulfilling your dreams… and doing so in style.

Stories, Tales, Lies, and Exaggerations
The fun stuff! Over the past five years, Mike Stoute and I have chronicled our stories on TSB. These are the stories that made Bobby and Mike the men they’ve become. You’ll read some inspiring stories… and other stories that display our humiliation. Some stories will educate you… other stories will entertain you… and other stories will have you asking “why the hell did I ever take advice from these guys?”

31 Days to Better Game
31 Days to Better game was an extremely popular series we ran at TSB Magazine where we presented a different lesson every day that would

all giving their unique perspective on improving certain areas of game. There are 31 lessons that walk you through many different areas of game. I believe that you can get something out of following the 31 day plan. Whether you’re a novice or an experienced PUA. The lessons were brought to you by some of the best dating coaches.COM help you improve your dating life. bloggers. I think you’ll enjoy this section a lot. and gurus. 8 .The Best of TSBMAG.

Social Superstar Confidential Social Intelligence Manuscript Table of Contents Introduction Chapter 1: What defines a superstar? Chapter 2: Image is everything (authority + social proof) Chapter 3: The 10 Second Impression (authority + social proof) Chapter 4: Building Your Social Resume (authority + social Proof) Chapter 5: The Attitude (liking + scarcity) Chapter 6: Be Captivating (liking + scarcity + authority) Chapter 7: Cultivate a fan base (commitment + liking + reciprocation) 9 .

The only reason I have not released it up until now is because many of the strategies contained in this manuscript I have personally used within some of my current social circles. It works. It was at this point that I took the original manuscript and began altering it to include some more of the hidden techniques of some of the world's best pick-up artists. which focused on the psychology of influence. and we applied to the realm of climbing the social ladder. Pick-up artists are usually defined by their ability to cold approach a random woman and quickly close her. After graduating college I took the principles originally constructed and altered them a bit for "the real world. This manuscript is not going to teach how to be the world's best pick-up artist. Robert Ciaduini. Ciaduini. If you follow the guidance of this will never have the need to cold approach again. The teachings in this manuscript transformed my friends back at Montclair State University from relative nobodies." I found them to be even more effective. Everything in this manuscript has been tested and refined. 10 . It was around 2002 and that I found the underground seduction community. We took the teaching of Dr. This manuscript was first conceived while I was back in college. One of my friends and I attended a private seminar held by social scientist Dr. This manuscript is about building an empire of friends and fans. At that point I was just coming out of a relationship and began studying the art of seduction. and were even featured on prime time news for our antics at the Homecoming day parade.COM Introduction This manuscript has been developed over the past 10 years.into a group of men who threw 400+ people parties.The Best of TSBMAG. And with those friends and fans… women will naturally follow.

energy. or simply enigmatic. there are certain characteristic that they all share. Listen to the way they construct their conversations. Other people want to drink in the enthusiasm. When you think of social superstars. No matter how different the external image of these guys may seem.who come to mind? Maybe you know a few guys personally who have this characteristic? Or maybe you immediately think of a guy like George Clooney.Social Superstar Chapter 1: What Defines A Superstar? So you want to be a Social Super star? And live large? Some guys are just born with inane gift to control the energy of any room they enter. People will naturally want to be around them. or Johnny Depp. Tommy Lee. and vitality that the social superstar produces. You should picture their specific body language. hear the way their voice sounds when it comes out of their mouths. They will want to be associated with them. What aspects of them are unique and unlike the many others you come in contact with who don’t possess their charisma? 11 . Listen to the way they use humor casually. These guys will often be referred to as charismatic. Right now. I would like you to take the time to think about the guys you have met in your personal life who have best exemplified the image of social superstar. charming. or have you quarterbacking in the Super Bowl -it will have you commanding the power and respect these guys have. Tom Brady. within your specific social scene. These characteristics are the blue print for social superstardom. Spend a minute to get a clear picture of them in your mind. While simply copying their characteristics will not land you roles in motion pictures. Envision the way the carry themselves. focus on specific aspects of them. Listen to the way they talk. First. posture. and sense of personal style. Once you have a clear picture of them in your mind. Now I want you to spend a minute writing down the different characteristics of them that jumped out at you.

Try to capture in words. 12 .you can manipulate the reaction you receive by others. In fact. Try to describe the energy that these social superstars instilled in others around them. Or the energy that is sucked out of the room when they depart. and why you want to become it. Imagine the way a woman would react to one of their advances. The reason that I have asked you to write down both the specific characteristics of these men and the specific ways in which people reacted to them. Hear the way people speak about them when they were not around. You can't become a superstar if you don't have fans propping you up. First. If you want to become a Social Superstar. It has everything to do with the way that people react to them. And second. Imagine the way their entourage would follow one of their commands. I will repeat this phrase for emphasis: It has everything to do with the way that people react to them. The Reaction They Receive What you must first understand going forward is that what causes these men to rise to the level of social superstar has nothing to do with what is inside of them. you must first have a clear goal of what you are trying to become. I want you to envision the way other people react to them. Write down the desire that women had toward them.COM After you have jotted down a list of the distinct characteristics I want you to dig a little deeper. by understanding that there is nothing unique inside of these menyou'll know that you too are capable of reaching their level. Envision the look on people’s faces when they walk into a room. the envy that other people felt towards them. This is important for you to fully comprehend this for two main reasons. is because it is my way of outlining the goal for this manuscript. fundamentally it has nothing to do with them at all. Over the course of this manuscript you will learn to use the principles of persuasion and influence to climb to the highest level of any social ladder.The Best of TSBMAG. and ideally onto a greater stage. Now spend a minute writing down the different ways in which people react to them. In the following chapters I will delve much deeper into the process you must go through to elevate yourself to Social Superstar status amongst your social scene. you'll realize that by using the principles of persuasion and influence.

The image you present to the world should establish you an authority on your scene. Your image should also convey social proof. These cars are sitting right alongside of hundreds of other cars. They don’t yell out for your attention. You can’t wait for your peers to tell you what to are actively involved with "cooler" social circles. The Corvette. You need to dress fashionably. They don’t flag you down. Because if you’re waiting for them to dictate what you can wear. their fine details. You need to know what the current trends are before most everyone else. or what music 13 . The 745i series. The Plan: Image is everything. You have to be ahead of them with the trends. But you notice these cars. Your image should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are the person to look up to for determining what is cool. trendy. The SL500 Mercedes convertible. and say “look at me” But these are the cars you look at because of their reputation. or hip. what cars catch your attention? The Ford Taurus? The Toyota Corolla? No. When you walk into a parking lot. The Porsche. People will automatically assume that since you have the social intelligence to stay fashionable. These cars have a presence and if you want to be a social superstar you need to have just as powerful of a presence.Social Superstar Chapter 2: Image is everything (Authority + Social Proof) Your objective: The objective of creating an image is to establish both authority and social proof. It is how you carry yourself. Think like this. In this chapter you just need to recognize that by being trendy and fashionable you are presenting yourself as having a high level of social intelligence. and their alluring Image.

You’re right. You need to be up to date with the trends. But what you can do is mimic the clothes by purchasing similar outfits of less expensive brands.The Best of TSBMAG. You are probably thinking that you can’t afford the clothes they are wearing. If you’re more of the athlete type choose someone like Tom Brady or Tony Romo. It isn’t called “being trendy” for nothing. it’s out of style. You can also start putting more of your focus. But the sneakers must be the real deal. A solid pair of kicks is your best investment. or they have friends that are keenly aware telling them what is going on. You want to copy their style from their day to day life. Instead of dropping $60 on a new video game… buy a pair of the trendiest sneakers you can find. You can’t. If you’re going after the “bad ass” look you would want to choose someone like Colin Farrell. and magazines to know what the trends are. chances are by the time you’re wearing it. The examples I’m giving may be outdated by the time you read this. Generally I recommend picking a celebrity you most resemble. and energy toward you image. If you’re going for a preppy look choose someone like Matt Damon. You can by a whole new wardrobe for like $50. I always suggest modeling yourself after a celebrity that you most resemble or whose style you would like to emulate. Celebrities pay fashion consultants thousands of dollars to keep them trendy… there is no reason not to take advantage of the lessons they teach with every outfit they wear. And once they’ve run their course and 14 . what you see in the gossip magazines. Social Superstars know what the current trends are because they are keenly aware of what is going on. This is the basis of who you are in the public eye. When it comes to creating your image. Another option that I’ve done is go to thrift shops or Salvation Army stores with clip outs of outfits you want to put together. money. Choose someone in their twenties. Spend $100 if you have to. You don’t want to copy their style from a movie. blogs. If you don’t have “cool” friends then you need to be following fashionable websites. If you’re the artsy music type choose someone from a popular band.COM you can listen to. Choose someone who is well known and followed in the media. Everything else can be second hand. But it is also important to pick someone who fits the style you are going after.

Your posture should make you appear to be confident and at ease with your surroundings. and stand. automatically paints you as a person of high self. People around you WILL notice this and subconsciously decide that you ARE a person of prestige. and knowing how to carry yourself throughout.Social Superstar gone out of style. friendly smile is a strong weapon. A sincere. * What is your mind set? You are in a situation that requires a strong focus on tact and diplomacy. Even if you’re not at ease. pay attention to your posture so that it seems as though you are. * Pay attention to how you walk. You may cast a glance. In a world where most people lack a high level of self-respect. It breaks the ice. * Flaunt a sincere. and what to say when you speak. work on maintaining a healthy tan. and posture to build immediate social proof. your goal is to give off the impression that you’re a prestigious person accustomed to ranking high in social circles . friendly smile at strategic intervals (but don’t overdo it . And if you don’t have a high 15 .learn to read when it is called for. tonality. sit. No sunshine? Find a nearby tanning salon. But for remainder of this chapter I want to give you some more hints on how to make your image more appealing.not even the blonde-bombshell walking by can shake this poise. it is easy to stand out when you have it and it shows. In the end.from The 7 Elements of Charisma. The Elements of Image and Charisma Here are some other tips to enhance your presence and image . but you’re too prestigious to stare. * If you’re white. Meaning. you’re never “star-struck” because you are the star. tears down people’s walls. body language. But image is more than just wearing trendy clothes. Buy a new pair. knowing when not to speak. It is the total package. and when it’s not). you’re not paying too much attention to any one person) . * How do your eyes follow the crowd? As if you’re disinterested (meaning. I am going to go into great detail about how to use things like physiology. knowing when to speak. In other words.esteem and confidence. In the next chapter. The 10 Second Impression.and that’s because you feel that there is nobody worthy of your attention. A good pair of sneakers or shoes is the cornerstone of a good wardrobe.

you’ll be prejudged as probably being a thug. And if you look like a charismatic person used to respect and even admiration. it is an acquired art . you will be prejudged as a person who is probably charismatic and worthy of respect and even admiration. If you look like your gay. This is what he or she expects. And now you’ve created “presence. you ask yourself: How is this person going to interpret my next few words? What kind of effect are they going to have? What effect is it that I’m going for? Will I sound like I know what I’m talking about? Or will I sound like a fool? Will I sound confident? Or will I sound cocky? Will I sound sincere. Once you’ve been prejudged.The Best of TSBMAG. Take note . you’re using this instinct to your advantage (which most people can’t control because they’re unaware that it is something happening in their subconscious). Maybe for a very rare and select few. Charisma opens many doors and will get you into many places otherwise far off limits. * Before speaking to a person. Here’s an analogy: If you look like a thug. It is a very influential tool when you want something. prestigious selfimage don’t accomplish much. And because they expect it. but when packaged together they merge for great effect.the trick to faking it is to fake it with sincerity (this will be repeated further along). presence is but one.” When creating a charismatic image. or will I sound fake? Will I come across as a good conversationalist. You need to give off the impression that you are an important person and are considered an important person by others. now it’s that much easier to give it to them. Most people don’t understand the charismatic persona and can only assume that it comes naturally to some people. it’s that much easier to create the effect that you’re after.COM level of self-respect (again. then fake it. Many elements make up Image. For the rest of us. By themselves.something that we practice in our daily encounters with others until it is developed over time. In the chapter on attitude I will give you tips to help the right attitude to come naturally to you. these simple details regarding a positive. like most). You need to always be conscious of how you appear to other people. Notice that we used the word “probably” in the above paragraph? We use the word “probably” to represent the other person’s expectations. someone who listens more than he speaks? Or will I seem as though I talk too much and therefore am not a good conversationalist? 16 . you’ll be prejudged as probably being gay.

This means even when you are not actively engaged in a conversation you need to present you best image. 17 .. What you say doesn’t have to be perfect. These articles should provide a nice foundation for becoming a better conversationalist. elusive. * Your actions must seem natural and executed with ease . You need to be a good conversationalist. * Practice being subtle (”subtle.” as used here. or hurts your image in any other when you act. as if you could do much more.hurrying betrays a lack of control over yourself. If you don’t have any clue what makes a good conversationalist read through some of the articles on http://www.. about building conversation skills. a coward.Social Superstar The above advice is sound.tsbmag.’). Below are some tricks you need to convey: * Never seem to be in a hurry . * Always seem patient. Cloak your focus on the elements (which will more than likely seem intense when you first start practicing the art) by being confident on the outside and relaxed on the inside. You just want to think for a brief second if what you are saying conveys confidence and coolness. Never let them see you sweat. or if it makes you sound like a showboat. you are being watched at all times. act effortlessly. means ‘So slight as to be difficult to detect or analyze. but you don’t want to fall into the trap of constantly being inside your head worried about what you are going to say. and over time. as if you know that everything will come to you eventually.

nervously rubbing his chin. a stylish haircut. but those around you appear to respect you and look up to you. trendy jeans. and an expensive watch. It should convey that you are comfortable as the leader. wearing a nice button down shirts. the guy just stands there. avoiding eye contact with the other patrons. Your Plan: Imagine that you're sitting at a table in a crowded bar. Not only has your perception of him changed. He keeps timidly putting a finger up to get the bartender's attention. The man walks up to the bar. The bartender is busy and the man is forced to wait there for his drink a moment. and neither of them has squeezed over an inch to let him in.COM Chapter 3: The 10 Second Impression (authority + social proof) Your Objective: The objective of manipulating your non-verbal communication is to establish both authority and social proof. As you sip your beer you are making 10 second judgments on everyone that passes your table. Your 3 second judgment so far is positive. There is a person to his right and left. In less than a minute your entire perception of him has changed. he is of above average looks. You are not only completely comfortable within your scene. The combination of these three attributes you will provide you with the requisite social proof you need. And it should present you as a man with high social intelligence.The Best of TSBMAG. Your non-verbal communication should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are used to being treated well. but so has every girl's who was 18 . The non-verbal communication you present to the world should establish you an authority on your scene. You are observing everything that is going on around you. A man walks by. and squished. slouched down. While the bartender is serving a girl on the other end of the bar.

Yes. 19 . their walks. tan." The Irresistible Offer This means that you need to be completely congruent in all areas of your identity. But that is not enough to be a superstar. in which he talks about how the best marketers create a short pitch that is so powerful that it is almost impossible not to buy. But you must be aware that there is more at play then how you are dressed up. Everything we've gone over in the preceding chapters regarding creating the look of a superstar is important. your social intelligence. You need to not only present them with the features. That guy… standing alone waiting for his drink. in a nice outfit. These are the non verbal cues that people look for when making a snapshot judgment on someone else. "The Irresistible Offer" is the title of a book by Mark Joyner. If you walked into any high school in America. Although all of the physical signs should be pointing to "cool" it is apparent that he is anything but. and which of the students were bound to be eating their lunch alone in the cafeteria. It is all prominently on display by the way they carry themselves. and your sex life. the proof.Social Superstar eying him down as he walked by. He's a good looking guy. and physical appearance. and the amount of eye contact that they make with other students. You need to create the irresistible offer. He claims that in today's marketplace. the benefits. in your best outfit. There are certain telling cues that allow people to make instant decisions about your level of self esteem. but you also must take away any last hint of doubt. So has the perception of every guy who was subconsciously sizing himself up against the guy for dominance on the social hierarchy. you have extremely limited time to catch the public's attention. We've already discussed fashion. within minutes you would be able to tell which of the students were of the popular crowd. You wouldn't have to speak to a single one of them. There is a saying I love "Walk the talk. and has a body most guys would kill for… but he just looks uncomfortable and out of place. grooming. you must dress fashionable and cool. We've talked about how it is important that you always present your best self. you must present your physical attributes in the best possible light. Yes.

They can bring you onto MTV's Made. In the following sections we are going to go into detail in the different areas that make up your non verbal cues. After his powerful stories of success. If you are going to create yourself to be "the irresistible offer" you need to hit them from every one of these angles. and must stand up to the test of scrutiny. I am extremely confident. Brad is a well known social artist. In the first few minutes of the speech Brad gave some details about the various 10 minute lays that he has had in his lifetime." Brad.COM The best way to remove any last hint of doubt is to "Walk the talk" and carry yourself like a superstar. says "It's true I dress in a sexy way… and if a woman was going to fuck a guy in ten minutes he'd probably look like me… but no. These areas in include: body language. eye contact. and have you done up by the best fashion consultant. he asked the audience why they believed he is able to continually have women willing to sleep with him after knowing him for less than a half hour.The Best of TSBMAG. I don't want you to mistakenly interpret this to mean that you must be perfect. posture. As we will discuss later in "Never appear too perfect" you must show some vulnerability and flaws… the flaws just can't come involve any of these cues. The first student says. but there are a lot of extremely confident guys who don't pull girls into random bathrooms for spontaneous sex" A second student says "Because of the way you dress. Everything about you needs to be congruent." A third student says "It's got to be that you know how to talk to a girl in a way that will get them horny enough to fuck you. I was at a seminar listening to the legendary Brad P speaking about how to get a 10 minute lay. and how well you follow the general rules of intrapersonal communication." 20 . One by one members of the audience raised their hands to give their input. The way you carry yourself is the one thing that cannot be faked. and makeup artists in the world… but if you're body's non verbal cues remain the same. you will be identified as a fraud immediately. who dresses like a rockstar. personal trainers. "Because you are extremely confident" And Brad says "Yes. that isn't why. and has a cult following of men who aspire to be like him.

brought to our minds all of our own insecurities. They key to creating hypnotic body language is comfort. and I make it impossible for them to not want to fuck me in ten minutes…" Brad presents the women he meets with "the irresistible offer. Sean Connery is highly regarded as the actor that best portrayed the character James Bond. He is so comfortable in the role… that you believe he is James Bond. None of these feelings are sexy. the example we used of the man waiting for his drink. I have sexy body language. I am dressed like a rock star. His body language makes you forget that you're watching an actor PLAY James Bond. How do you give your appearance that same hypnotic appeal as sex? In the previous section. "Everything" Brad says. I am confident. Meanwhile Brad has been writing each answer down on the teleprompter in front of him. While it can be argued that all of the actors nailed the part… it is obvious upon watching a few scenes of Connery as Bond to notice just how comfortable he appears in the role. Finally Brad points to the seven answers on the screen. but we would be doing so in the same way we that we just can't turn away from a car wreck. 4 Ways to Make Your Body Language More Hypnotic 1. standing awkwardly alone. "Oh… I get them so horny they can hardly contain themselves when I talk to them… but a lot of guys can talk a good game. The man. anxieties." How to Create Comfortable Body Language Sex is hypnotic. That's why it's used so blatantly in advertisements. I talk good game. made us feel uncomfortable.Social Superstar And Brad says. So what is the secret to hypnotic body language? It is easier than you think. "I get ten minute lays because I am all seven of these answers. We may keep our gaze on the man. Be relaxed 21 . and fears." The students shout out several more answers. If you want to create a hypnotic presence as a superstar… you need to be so comfortable in the role that your audience accepts your role without reservations.

If you are nervous and tense when you go out… naturally the physiology you present will be that of a nervous and tense person.The Best of TSBMAG. But if you learn to control your physiology. The interesting thing about physiology is that once you learn how to manipulate it. What you are basically trying to do is put yourself in a sort of hypnotic state of relaxation. How you stand 2. How you walk/move 3. Be confident 4. This is especially true of your facial muscles. There are three main body positions in most social situations which you can use to convey comfort: 1. Subconsciously people tend to mirror the people they are surrounded by. you can use it to your advantage pretty regularly. tense gestures… your brain will assume a position of relaxation. The easiest and most productive way to relax your mind is through slow controlled breathing. so that you can put an end to them. Be Relaxed The easiest way to make people comfortable around you is to be relaxed around them. Slow down We are going to show you how to demonstrate these four qualities to further illustrate how to create a compelling presence. In order to make physiology work in your favor it is necessary to recognize your nervous habits. If you want to achieve relaxing body language you first must relax all of your muscles. Be powerful 3. causing an almost crawled up appearance. The more relaxed you appear to be. Once you slow your breathing down. 22 . How you sit Here is an explanation of each. If your mind is nervous… it will be harder to control your physiology. When we are nervous we tend to tense up our jaw muscle.COM 2. Along with relaxing your muscles you need to relax your mind. your heart rate naturally follows. slowly those around you will tend find themselves falling into a relaxed state. and stop the nervous. We also tend get really tense in the shoulders.

The emotion of nervousness often manifests itself through these nervous behaviors. or playing with your drink all tell the set and everyone around you that you are not only nervous around them. It is important to remember to keep control of your hands. let them hang naturally by your sides. you’ll start to automatically relax more in social situations. other people with run their hand through their hair. At the beginning you’ll have to force this. Looking relaxed while standing Nervous ticks such as swaying from side to side. The beautiful thing as I mentioned earlier is that the discontinuation of performing these nervous ticks will trigger in your brain that you are no longer nervous… and your brain will command you to act in the way you naturally do when you are comfortable. Looking relaxed when walking One of the most common ways a man displays nervousness while walking is to keep his hands in his pockets as he walks. Get in the habit of catching yourself whenever you find that you are performing any of the above habits. The minute that you recognize yourself using your hands to display nervousness… immediately stop and place your hands by your side in a relaxed manner. At first it may be a constant battle with yourself. others will juggle the loose change in their pocket. you are emotionally reacting to them. but that they are higher value and thus. touching. Instead. but after some practice. moving around too much. You don’t know what to do with your hands so you shove them in your pockets. Fight the urge to start rubbing. Some people will rub their chin or neck. Force yourself to relax and let your arms just fall. Doing any of these things immediately screams that you are not comfortable in your present situation. You’ll notice a marked improvement in your interactions. playing with your hands or fingers. This behavior communicates that you’re nervous and that you feel awkward. but after enough training you will naturally no longer perform these nervous ticks. Eliminate them. 23 . or fiddling. When people feel insecure or nervous they start to have trouble sitting still. Their insecurity eats away at them and they feel forced to constantly be moving their hands.Social Superstar Below are some of the nervous habits that you will need to avoid… and ultimately replace with more positive empowering habits.

While you are seated it is best to keep both feet on the floor. and if you keep one foot on your knee while talking you might have a tendency to shake the free foot. which is face up. alone. One of which is power. Don't squeeze your hands. The subcommunication behind this body language tick is that you’re nervous and uneasy. creating a silly looking distraction. the objective is to take up space while appearing relaxed and comfortable. If you are constantly crossing and un-crossing your feet and legs you'll appear uncomfortable. A low value person can be relaxed… but very few low value people will be both relaxed and powerful. It is best to keep your hands apart. This helps you maintain control and good body posture. The reason that you want to display power and dominance is because these qualities communicate value. but if you find that you are fidgeting too much then cup your right hand face down in your left hand. In this case it’s the drink. and relaxation with your body language. Once seated. it is not enough to create that hypnotic captivating presence. Being Powerful While having a relaxed appearance will surely make others around you feel more comfortable. Don’t overdo ‘taking up space’ lest you come off as tryhard. A superstar knows how to balance the two. security. As we spoke about above in relation to "being relaxed" you will find that the more powerful a physiology you present. hold your drink down by your hip and don’t cross your arms or take a protective stance. You are trying to convey abundance. simply let them lay together on your lap. You will need to incorporate several other characteristics into your body language. you will naturally come to feel more powerful. There is nothing good that your fingers can do above your neck. 24 .” This is when people hold their drink in front of their chest in a social environment. keep your hands away from your face and hair. Looking relaxed while sitting When you sit.The Best of TSBMAG. So your instinctive reaction is to cover your midsection (traditionally the most vulnerable spot on most mammals) with some sort of protection.COM Another thing to be conscious of when you're standing in a bar or club is the “drink shield. Instead. Feet belong on the floor.

25 . as I think this article is best representation of keeping your power as you walk. Whenever this happens to you. These are not the kind of people other people want to interact with. one of three things happens typically: I. Looking powerful when walking One of the most efficient ways to walk in a more powerful way is to implement the Gunslinger Walk. as they appear to have nothing to offer. After experimenting with the "cape walk" for several weeks I began to naturally feel more powerful as I walked. It is important to learn some of the ways that people give their power away as to avoid them. Avoid holding your face up with your hand. This displays the image that you’re too bored or tired to bother holding up your head..Social Superstar I learned this technique years ago while listening to an Anthony Robbins CD in which he describes "the cape walk. You move for the other person." The "cape walk" is technique in which you imagine you have a Superman cape hanging down your back. III. If you think that you're having trouble being heard then maybe you should work on your tonality and voice projection. One of the hallmark traits of this behavior is head straight..these impressions present that of a less than powerful person. and make a conscious effort to recondition yourself to avoid the negative habit in the future. Throughout society. Here is the article in its entirety. Many times guys do this because they believe that the other person cannot hear them. people often get into a situation where two people are walking directly at each other. You both move halfway out of the way. The minute you lean in you have just handed them the power in the conversation. Another way to give your power away is to lean in when talking to someone. You then go on to walk as if this long cape is flowing down your back. The other person moves for you. People that feel a lack of power tend to offer nothing to the world. It can also give off the impression that you’re uncomfortable with the way you look and are trying to hide your face. It displays a lack of enthusiasm and energy towards life. II. The Gunslinger Walk is based off of an article originally published by Sebastian Drake.

self-assured smile finishes the look.COM People move for people that they see as higher status than them subconsciously. This does not bode well for meeting her later. It’s mirrored off people who brim with the utmost confidence. you will move a half-step out of the way. Roll in the hips: An exaggerated push from the hips with each lift of the leg. Henceforth. The Gunslinger’s Walk is a highly exaggerated style of walk based on highly successful men and the caricature and archetype of an 1800’s gunslinger . Knowing smile: The disarming.especially a beautiful woman you’re signifying that you see her as better than you. and inspiration into the hearts of those around them. large muscles.either the white-hat sheriff.The Best of TSBMAG.and that’s it. Simply observing one of these people can strike wonder. With a solid presence. The man might have status from a style of dress. The most common and obvious example are beautiful women. You’ll move if you meet someone handicapped. you will feel people who believe themselves lower social status than you moving out of your way as you move through the world without you even doing anything. 26 . but it can be a hell of a lot of fun. Men who moved with raw electrifying presence. Roll in the heels: An exaggerated roll of the heels at the end of each step. or the black-hat bandit. elderly. Thrown back shoulders: The essence of good body language. Slow movement: Moving extremely slowly through crowds. When you move out of someone’s way . awe. and then high status men. or just the way he carries himself. The key elements of a Gunslinger’s Walk are: Horizonview: Staring beyond the crowd and expecting it to part. Gunslinging isn’t necessary. With people who are also high status. or young children . you NEVER move for another person based on status alone. and they will move the other half step.

but instead staring past them into the distance as they think about what goals they want to achieve. To take this to its logical extreme. In modern times. The lower value person moves from the way of the higher gives you a 27 . Slow Movement When gunslingin’. and draw a bit more attention to yourself. Ka-ching… ka-ching… ka-ching… Throw your hips into your walk. To aid you. Roll in the Hips and Heels When your foot lands.he never made himself small. Remember to keep your shoulders back and broad at all times. and people are more likely to move out of the way of you as you pass. Every time two people walk directly towards one another in a straight line. with your chest out and your stomach in.Social Superstar The Horizon view The legendary cowboys did not look at a crowd as they moved through it: Their eyes were always looking past. Thrown back Shoulders Rise up to your full stature. This will add to your stature once again. and “roll through” into the front of your foot. He moved with purpose. you transcend the negotiation and the struggle. It’s crucial to keep your view to the horizon if you’re rolling your hips: You look like you’re a larger than life figure that way. rolling them through so you rock ever so-slightly back and forth each time you move. you see the most beautiful women and high status men not looking at people directly in front of them. everyone is forced to go around them. Picture the cowboy . By taking a long past view at the horizon. it’s hard to get people to move for you. staring off into the horizon and the adventures that lay beyond. and with his full stature. or falsely humble. if someone is stopped. or meek. So move slower than people around you . it becomes a negotiation. pushing off the ball. land first with your heel. you can mentally imagine a “ka-ching” sound like a cowboy’s spurs every time your foot touches the ground. it’s crucial to move at a slow pace. When you hurry through the world. as opposed to just trying to court attention.

knowing. quite an impression. It’s a slight. This “directs 28 . rolling your heels and hips. there’s a great chance the crowd will break and you can then “part the seas” as you move through it. raise your right arm from your side upwards. and tend to break sideways. makes you look powerful. and means people scurrying will tend to defer to you. which creates quite a stir. with your palm facing towards they way you want them to go. Directing Traffic One last tip that’ll help with gunslinging. You don’t look at people in front of you that are oncoming. Jackpot.COM presence. A slight smile goes a long way with gunslinging to keep curiosity mixed in and soften you up slightly. The Knowing Smile When gunslinging. people’s natural instincts are to follow the people in front of them. if you want someone to pass you on your left. and quite an entrance. so get the fundamentals down first. This one’s a bit more advanced and complicated. So. You can “direct traffic” by which hand you hold up as people are walking towards you. remember to smile . The effect becomes more pronounced the more people who do it: So. one person moves .The Best of TSBMAG. you look at one point off into the distance where you’re walking. if you choose to try it. self-assured and self-confident smile. great body language. Your palm should be facing left. with a view on the horizon. with a slight knowing smile. Then.don’t try to “look hard”. with just a dash of cockiness mixed in. you start gunslinging. The key is to lift up the opposite hand of the way you want the person to go. moving slowly. How to Part a Crowd Here’s the secret behind my legendary gunslinging performances: Once two people simultaneously break out of your way at the front of a crowd.then two. They assume that someone or something important is coming through.

especially in nightclubs. You can observe this in others. Looking powerful while sitting What you want to communicate is that you do not make any apologies for your existence and that you are used to always being comfortable. Your hands should drape at your sides the way they naturally fall. shoulders pulled back. it’s invaluable. Don’t go overboard with it. Useful tactics to convey this include draping your arms over the backs of chairs or over the seatbacks of booths or couches. Your stance should project confidence. Do not put your hands in your pockets or cross them over your chest. The main communication here is that you are comfortable and confident. Do not cross your arms over your chest for this reason. Marine would stand when at ease. Feet and legs can be spread moderately or crossed ankle-to-knee. Sliding forward slightly in your seat will allow you to lean back even in a vertically-backed chair. it’s a sign of weakness and also looks unattractive. or get high on the power… Looking powerful when standing If you want to have a powerful presence while standing than the first rule is to take up space. look up. standing up straight. When you’re standing. squished between two other customers as he waited for his drink. and chest somewhat out. never look down.Social Superstar traffic”. Your upper body should ideally be leaning back without hunching over. though it’s tricky to get. Keep your head up. The Gunslinger’s Walk is a potential nuclear reactor in your social toolbox. was a clear example of standing in a less than powerful way.S. In that example the man clearly gave up his power to the other two customers who forced him to stand there uncomfortably. Once you get it though. you want to stand with your feet shoulder-width apart or slightly wider. If you need to look away. 29 . Picture the way a U. In the example we used earlier about the guy in the bar. Your weight should generally be towards the rear of your soles (closer to the heel) so that you always appear to be leaning back. but one which clearly does not lend itself to laziness. so have fun and use it wisely. It should not be an uncomfortable stance. Looking down even has been proven to have a bad effect on your mental state.

because it’s different and new. shoulders. Cause and affect get blurred. the object is to convey dominance and purpose. Co-workers and those around you often might comment that you seem…different. the bathrooms. In fact. Your hands should swing naturally at your sides while you walk but without looking either stiff or “floppy. Just what we were going for.” Practice this in the mirror if you suspect they are moving unnaturally. a clear one. though. The Japanese have long held the belief that a cluttered home leads to a cluttered mind. You’ll find yourself with this new confidence that wasn’t there before and doesn’t seem to have much of an explanation.COM Being Confident As I mentioned earlier…there’s a bonus beyond the initial differences that changing your body language communicates to the outside world. It also can change your inner one. Except that you are standing like you are confident. Seriously. even if they aren’t selfaware enough to know why. but hold the pose for 5 minutes. and you wind up feeling a certain way just because you are acting that way. and a clean one. an exit. butt. Don’t believe me? Try it. It’s going to feel weird for awhile. this works. and when you change the way you move. Your feet. When you are moving towards something (a set. and head should all touch the wall.The Best of TSBMAG. etc). and you project confidence to all comers. Pick a wall and stand up straight against it. The outer world touches our inner one. Walk at about 50% of your normal speed when in the venue. you look better standing straight. and eventually it won’t feel weird. you will naturally be projection power and confidence as you walk. exerting about the same amount of pressure (no smooshing). it’ll start to feel good. Either way. Keep going. When you walk or move. take the shortest route 30 . Now walk away from the wall. Women find you more attractive. like someone stuck a pole up your ass. How do you feel? Right. Looking confident while walking If you read and follow the Gunslinger Walk as discussed above. you also change the way you think.

Try learning how to turn your head slowly. A relaxed and powerful person tends to appear very confident. Oftentimes women notice you and the way you move or interact with people and they make judgments about you before you’ve even noticed them. alert. you give the impression of having low self esteem. when moving through the crowd. or if your head hangs down. optimistic. He’s just too cool. Once you have a foundation for the laws of interaction. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. you want to project dominance.Social Superstar possible—usually a straight line. how to blink slowly. self-assured. In an upcoming chapter on interpersonal communication rules I will go over the correct ways to interact with others. 31 . slouching. This makes a huge impact on how others perceive you. Have you ever noticed that James Bond never looks like he doesn’t know how to act? And that he never fidgets or behaves nervously? Everything James does is a little slower than it should be. and even appearing depressed. We will go into more detail regarding posture in the following chapter. lack of confidence. Once again. but for right now it is important to know that standing erect (not "stuck up") gives the impression that the person is confident. or shuffling your feet. Looking confident while standing If you are slumped over. Slowing down and taking deliberate actions Watch a few James Bond films. and healthy. Similarly. This will radiate from you. Looking confident while sitting The best way to appear confident while sitting is to follow the advice for both looking relaxed and powerful. walk straight up with confidence. you will naturally become more confident in your interactions. simply following the rules for looking relaxed and powerful will make you appear more confident as you stand there. Instead of circling a set several times like a vulture.

If someone else is talking to you. Habit 3: Keep your muscles relaxed. This is especially true of your facial muscles. While doing the talking you should be holding eye contact for the majority of the time. Habit 8: Walk with confidence and power. Don’t slouch and look sloppy. Habit 2: Get in the habit of walking around with your head up and your neck straight. When we tend to get nervous we tense up in the jaw. A smile displays a positive energy that is infectious. Spread yourself out a bit. In the beginning you will need to constantly be checking yourself. shoulders back. This is another habit you will have to check often to avoid falling back into the old habit of slouching. This means your head should be high. Habit 4: Smile often. but don’t be afraid to get comfortable. it hurts”. If you don’t have a naturally attractive smile than you should practice in front of a mirror. Habit 5: Push your chest out a bit and pull your shoulders back. Create a little game with yourself to remind yourself to pay attention to your posture. Look around slowly and smoothly.The Best of TSBMAG. don’t dart around and jolt your head around like you have been drinking espressos all day long. Also walk with direction.COM This kind of body language transmits the message: “I’m so comfortable in my own skin. neck up. hold eye contact about 50% of the time. This is especially true when walking through a bar… you never want to give off the vibe that you’re looking for the cool place to 32 . The idea is to take up some space. Habit 7: Take up space when you sit. If you’re talking to a group of people switch eye contact up between the different members of the group… but always be holding it with someone. Try never to appear to be in a hurry or flustered. and take big slow steps. Your new body language habits to implement immediately Habit 1: Make it a practice to hold eye contact with everyone that you meet. You need to keep your face free of this stress. Habit 6: You should keep your feet about as far apart as your shoulders. Tell your friends to point this out to you. chest puffed out a bit.

do it slowly like it doesn’t embarrass you that she noticed. A man becomes more attractive when he exhibits grace and poise. It takes a constant and conscious effort to achieve rockstar posture. elegance. David DeAngelo commonly recommends his students to watch "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. He is promising chivalry. The good news is that if you make yourself constantly aware of how your body appears. When talking to someone avoid clutching on to your beer or putting your hands in your pocket. Think Lenny Kravitz. Rock Star Posture A signature of any rockstar is their posture. These guys knew how to command a stage with their bodies. They had their audiences hypnotized by their movements. gestures. If you’re giving a girl a once over. Think Billy Idol. If you’re grabbing a drink off the bar take it at a speed that says “I’m in no hurry. How to improve your posture 33 . You want to give off the vibe that you know where it is and already are heading there. and gentleness. The trick to pulling all these habits together is to use slow calculated gestures. grace.Social Superstar be.” Try learning how to turn your head slowly." In the movie Michael Caine's character teaches Steve Martin's character how to be a European style gentleman. Most of us have downright horrible posture… let alone rockstar posture. and poise. Think Jim Morrison. Tommy Lee. and are routinely making the necessary adjustments. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. If you want to see an example of a man going through this transformation. Habit 10: Use hand gestures when telling a story. how to blink slowly. It's like he is embodying the hypnotic characteristics that make romance novels so popular. It is also the grace in which they move across the stage. Every gesture you make should flow naturally at the same speed as your previous gestures. you can have the same hypnotizing poise as Jim Morrison. Habit 9: Avoid making sudden hyper gestures.

Stretching and exercise to improve posture 34 . and pulling your head back in to your chest. Stretch the top of your head toward the ceiling. If you're serious about working on your posture you better get comfortable standing in front of a mirror. Or any movie starring George Clooney. sit and lie in positions where the least strain is placed on supporting muscles and ligaments. Most people think that to "stand up straight" means tensing your back to heave your chest 'in and up'. you're probably forcing your back into an unnatural position. It shouldn't hurt at all if you try this. This isn't the posture you should be striving for. The spine has two natural curves that you need to maintain called the 'double C' or 'S' curves. make sure that your weight is evenly distributed on your feet. If it does. 3. You'll need to constantly be watching yourself. The arches in your feet should be supported. Sure. but you don't.The Best of TSBMAG. shoulders. backward or sideways. 2. you might not have the money to hire their trainer… but that doesn't mean you can't emulate their posture and poise. 6. or Brad Pitt. and hips. Make sure your earlobes are in line with the middle of your shoulders. These guys are trained by professionals to be the embodiment of a movie star. Tuck your stomach in. 5. 4.COM Most people don't even know what good posture is. Tom Cruise. Do not tilt your pelvis forward. walk. your knees straight and your back straight. If you're unaware of what good posture looks like rent some James Bond movies. Good posture involves training the body to stand. Hold your head up straight with your chin in. Keep your shoulders back. When you tell someone to work on their posture they automatically start walking around like they are in the Marines. Now follow the above steps: 1. When standing straight up. but the spine itself curves in a slight 'S'. these are the curves found from the base of your head to your shoulders and the curve from the upper back to the base of the spine. If you've got a mirror nearby go to it right now and align your ears. These points make a straight line. and look stupid. You might feel like you are leaning forward. Do not tilt your head forward.

two) and lower them back to your waist (count one. do as many as you can. When you first make the commitment to improve your posture you should repeat these exercises several times per day. Raise both arms straight up. counting ten as you lower. and your ears aligned. like a cat. Avoid rolling in a circle. Hold for a slow count of ten. curl your back upwards. On your hands and knees. Align ears with shoulders. You'll be surprised how much exercise fits into 30 seconds. 3. raise both elbows (count one. You should at least feel a slight fatigue in the shoulder muscles. counting to ten as you raise arms. or the microwave to beep. A yoga class is a perfect example of one of these methods. and gently massage your neck. left. This is why it is important to do some of the following stretches: Tilt (stretch) your head in all four directions over your shoulders (forward. right). When you first begin to improve your posture you might find that you neck or back will tend to get a little sore. toast to pop. Raise both arms out to sides at shoulder length. If you have the time I good idea might be to take a yoga class. 35 . In fact. two). Think about being able to place a bowl in the hollow of your back. I'd probably start my day off doing them to feel fresh and add some extra energy to my morning. 2. and then the opposite. as it may cause further strain. Slowly lower arms to sides. you can even do these exercises without hand weights. Slowly raise arms back to shoulder height. place elbows at your side. Align your ears over your shoulders. You're not looking to build muscle mass… so you don't need to do the exercises with a large amount of weight. 1. and touch your shoulders with your hands. Keeping your hands on your shoulders. Be a penguin. Do 10 repetitions with both arms. constantly checking your alignment! If ten reps are too many to start. Do as many reps as your wait allows. back. then alternate 10 reps for each arm singularly. Remember to keep your ears aligned! Bend forearms toward shoulders to touch your shoulder blades. alongside your ears. While you wait for a web page to load.Social Superstar You want to do exercises that strengthen the muscles across your back and shoulders. As you'll find in later chapters… a social superstar is looking for every excuse he can to find new ways to mingle with people and make new friends. Do ten reps.

Let arms hang naturally down the sides of the body. the back of the head should also touch the wall . • • • • • Keep feet slightly apart. Flex your arms at a 75 to 90 degree angle at the elbows. not pushed out forward Stand straight and tall. 36 . the head is carried too far forward (anterior head carriage). back. not with weight on the heels. These 3 areas are sitting. In this position. But we know by now that "Rockstar Posture" is crucial for a superstar… here are some more ways you can improve in these areas. Keep your shoulders straight. and heels are all aligned. Align your back with the back of the office chair. Make sure your neck.if it does not. about shoulder-width. a footrest can be used along with the office chair. You may have to adjust the office chair. If there's a problem with feet reaching the floor comfortably.The Best of TSBMAG. Avoid locking your knees. Be sure the head is square on top of the neck and spine. with shoulders upright. If you're following the body language advice laid out in the previous chapter on these three areas you'll have already noticed a significant natural improvement in your posture. Stand against a wall with shoulders and bottom touching wall. Tuck the chin in a little to keep the head level. and walking. Avoid slouching or leaning forward. Keep both feet flat on the floor. standing.COM As we discussed in the previous section on body language there are 3 general times the superstar needs to be keenly aware of his posture… and constantly working on improving it. especially when tired from sitting in the office chair for long periods. • • • Standing Stand with weight mostly on the balls of the feet. Sitting • • Sit in an office chair.

disgust. There are six basic emotions in the human race. then doesn't is make sense to have them hypnotized by your eyes and your understanding of their wants and desires? You can do this by using your eyes to build rapport. And we all know how hard habits are to break. This means that for a couple months it is necessary that you are consciously aware of your posture. and create a feeling of arousal in the person you are trying to attract. Each of these emotions are easily expressed through our eyes. A glance into someone's eyes can often reveal if they are experiencing happiness. Our eyes reveal more about us than any other part of our body. The eyes are often referred to as "the windows to the soul. Tie a string on your finger. or sadness. The most important thing to realize when working on improving your posture is that bad posture is like a bad habit. Just be glancing into someone's eyes you can often tell what is going on inside their mind. If you want lasting results you need to find a way to engrain this into your mind for a couple months. If this is really the case." This statement is powerful because not only does it acknowledge the fact that we can read other people by simply looking into their eyes. Keep shoulders properly aligned with the rest of the body. fear. There is an accepted idea that most people will judge other people within the first five seconds of meeting them. set your phone alarm to go off randomly as a reminder. or keep an index card in your pocket with the words "Rock Star Posture" on it. The Eyes One of the most important and critical components of displaying powerful and confident body language is the eyes. Avoid pushing your head forward. anger. but that other people can read us by looking into ours.Social Superstar Walking • • Keep the head up and eyes looking straight ahead. surprise. Standing in front of a mirror for a couple days practicing won't get you lasting results. 37 . It is probably most effective if you find a way to constantly be reminding yourself to be in tune with it.

all of the experts will agree that strong eye contact indicates a powerful presence. Keep the focus of attention on the person you are talking to. When you break eye contact. and marketing yourself. 38 . It is important to know that men and women have different comfort levels in regards to the amount of eye contact that they are willing to give and receive. men tend to fix their gaze on one or two particular women in a setting… not paying attention to the many other women that might be watching them. When you are talking to anyone it is generally accepted that you use the 70% rule in the United States. If you don't get an acknowledgement back." This triangle extends from the ends of the eyebrows to the tip of this person's nose. In later chapters we will go into more details about picking up women.The Best of TSBMAG. but looking up to break eye contact is often thought of as waning interest. do not break to look at another person. Looking up in response to a question or while telling a story is fine.COM When it comes to presenting confident body language. As we will discuss in later chapters. Caress your partner with your eyes as you gaze into their eyes. or eye brow raise. In this chapter I want to discuss ways in which you need to continually be aware of how you can use your eyes to your advantage. and moving past the men they are not. But eye contact in regards to picking up women is something that I will discuss more later. knowing that you are always being watched… it is important to use eye contact correctly and efficiently. giving second glances to the men they are interested. This is why it is important that if she gives you an acknowledgement. will casually scan the room. to the left. When you intentionally break eye contact. nod. In this chapter I want to give you some various pointers in regards to the use of eye contact in regards to body language. then chances are you misunderstood her eye contact. This acknowledgement could come in the form of a smile. or to the right. If you make eye contact with a woman it is a good idea to give an acknowledgement to let them know you have noticed and are interested. But it is important to know how to correctly use that eye power as to not intimidate or scare away the person that you are trying to attract. you should always give one in return if you are interested. Women on the other hand. do so by looking down. and the various rules and insights that go along with the process. For instance. 70% of the time you will at the other person in the "eyes triangle.

They often contract when discussing issues that bring them sadness. they tend to be more self-disclosing about personal subjects. the more self esteem you are perceived to have. When women are engaged in a great degree of eye contact. Women engage in more eye contact them men do. • • • • • • • Researchers have discovered that one of the most striking differences between people who are socially confident and those who are shy. is that confident people have much more frequent eye contact with their conversational partners. Women are better non-verbal communicators than men. One reason men aren't as good in reading body language is hat men often communicate sitting or standing side by side and don't see as much non-verbal communication as women do. Others rarely interrupt two people engaged in a conversation if they have consistent eye contact. the greater the intimacy that is felt inside. the longer the eye contact between two people.Social Superstar Here is some scientific research on eye contacted as found in Kevin Hogan's book Irresistible Attraction: • • • • Generally speaking. When eye contact decreases mend tend to disclose more and women tend to disclose less. 39 . Pupils also enlarge when people are talking about things that bring them joy or happiness. The longer your eye contact. Attraction increases as mutual gazing increases. The more eye contact you can maintain. Eye contact has been show to be a significant factor in the persuasion process. Men can improve though. the higher self esteem you actually rate yourself on. Many shy people never make eye contact at all. tending to look downward or away. instead of looking at their conversation partner’s face.

If you gaze generally at the eyebrow area or the bridge of the nose. particularly at close range. not all people who stare piercingly at others mean it as 40 . When a person doesn't make eye contact with them. You may find that it eases your own discomfort if you let your vision go slightly out of focus. a struggle for dominance over another can often be signaled by a staring contest. In humans too. While some people have difficulty maintaining eye contact during conversations. keep the majority of your focus on the other person. If you have difficulty knowing exactly how to make eye contact. In many animals. prolonged staring into another person’s eyes. you can look at the person’s face without focusing solely on the eyes. They stare too intently into other people’s eyes when they are talking to them. especially Caucasians. a friendly gaze will do. Although some people use staring intently as a deliberate tactic to intimidate others. often making their conversation partners feel very uncomfortable. prefer to have a lot of eye contact when they are talking with someone. The very phrase "shifty-eyed" connotes a person whose eyes dart around the room. this is close enough to the eye region that you will appear to be looking at the person’s eyes. North Americans tend to assume that person is hiding something. your conversation partner may assume that you are bored. you can benefit from practicing in front of a mirror.COM Most North Americans. the use of staring is part of a power struggle to determine which animal is dominant over the other. Avoid intense. be sure to keep looking at that person frequently while you are talking. If you glance around the room too much. It can be very unpleasant to be on the receiving end of an intense stare. except in very rare situations. When you are speaking with someone who is from a culture that prefers a lot of eye contact. You don’t need to use a piercing stare. implying that they are untrustworthy.The Best of TSBMAG. even while you are wondering what to say next. If it really bothers you to look directly into another person’s eyes. others have the opposite problem. Whenever you are in conversation with someone. or that you are looking around for someone else you would rather talk with. or look too frequently at other people. or with another person.

nodding. They want to see your eyes. there are some cultural groups that prefer not to make very much eye contact. it can be a shock to find out that eye contact is not always welcomed. and by gazing at the entire face as well as the eyes. If you wear sunglasses. desirable thing to do. people of African American and First Nations origin usually prefer to make far less eye contact than Caucasians do. Although most North Americans like to have a lot of eye contact with their conversational partner. Even within North America. averting your eyes and keeping them lowered is considered the polite. make an effort to be sensitive to the expectations of the other person if you want to have a smooth relationship. If you are dealing with someone who has different cultural practices than what you are used to. These tips are from Kevin Hogan's Irresistible Attraction. this is not true of all people. There are many countries in the world where looking someone in the eye is considered to be disrespectful and an invasion of privacy. Some people who stare very intently into the eyes of others are quite unaware of the negative impression they are creating. but ultimately people want to see what they are getting.Social Superstar an act of aggression or dominance. If it has been your habit to stare intently into the eyes of other people without looking away. get ready to take them off. 41 • . In North America. If you have grown up in a cultural group that expects eye contact. Hey can add Mystery. Are they clear or are they bloodshot? People who look at you will notice and the clearer your eyes the more attractive people will perceive you to be. In many cultures around the world. In addition. You can lighten the impression you are making by smiling more often. Key Components of Hypnotic eyes These are some ideas that you can take with you for using your eyes as a tool for marketing yourself better. • Start with your eyes. you can frequently glance away for brief periods. you may have been making your conversation partners very uncomfortable.

Remember the longer they have eye contact with you the more emotional arousal they are experiencing inside. The wink is a great way to respond to a woman when she asks you a question you don’t feel like answering if she’s giving you a hard time… 3. look at them. but most folks can. If you want to attract someone. because she’s interested too. the wink is nonetheless a fantastic means of communication. Raising both eyebrows can be used to show a number of different moods and expressions. consider contacts or surgery.this is the more playful (still with some social pressure) version. 2. Make the person feel like they are the only person in the room that could possibly catch your eye. and shows a strong degree of social confidence and awareness on your part. This is an easy and effective way of communicating disbelief. Slow. Look at the person you are talking to about 70% of the time when communicating with them. or make a note when she shrugs hers at you. as in.The Best of TSBMAG. Wink (one eye). Eyebrow shrug. subtle shrug of the eyebrows (sometimes held longer) can also be used to express interest. It is often done subconsciously by both men and women . A quick. “Did you actually just say that?” Two versions: in one. you are looking away and to the right when you open your eyes. Avoid looking at others for any length of time when you are with someone who may be special.COM • • • • • • If you wear glasses. you are looking straight at the girl when you open your eyes . People need to see your eyes. 42 . Look at a woman from shoulders up and she will think you have depth and personality. 5 non verbal gestures you should master using your eyes 1. It’s sufficiently mysterious that it gets girls wondering. or is expecting a response . This is the version that puts more social pressure on the girl (to qualify herself or retract a remark).it can almost be used as a dare or can shrug your eyebrows at her to let her know you’re interested. Not everyone can do this. hard blink (two eyes). In the other. A favorite of television rakes and seducers. An eyebrow shrug can signify that a person is surprised.

and your eyes are in creating a seductive hypnotic presence. 43 . If you look at a woman and squint. Think James Bond. 5. and simultaneously shrugging your eyebrows. It helps to place them in the position of being the slightly skeptical selector. Intrapersonal Communication Rules One of the hallmarks of a superstar is the way in which he interacts with other people. posture. In the previous three sections we discussed how critical body language. As we will discuss in future chapters… the ability to talk well is one of the most important characteristics of a superstar. You will see that many men who are good with women squint while they are talking to them. Basically.Social Superstar 4. You hold this look and stare at her until she gives into the social pressure. Ultra-skeptical look. For instance. This is when you look at a woman like she just said the most retarded thing you’ve ever heard. as the most socially conscious in the room. If you are meeting a client or friend and you know that they are right handed sit to his right. The squint is a way of saying that you are thinking about something. When most people think of good conversationalists they automatically think the ability to talk well. Squint. or alternatively that you doubt the truth or accuracy of something that is being said. you pull your lips into a half-smile (with one side of your mouth). These guys don't always say a lot but they have the amazing ability to communicate more in glances and movements than most guys do in entire sentences. If he is left handed sit to his left. These are the elements that make up an interaction. But in there is more to an interaction than just words. What I mean by this is that there are certain rules that you can follow that will always present you in the best possible light. it can seem like you are sizing her up and trying to decide if you like her a lot. Think Don Draper. Here are some basic rules about choosing your seat in different circumstances. while kind-of laughing/huffing in a “I can’t believe she said that” way. the simple act of selecting where you sit can display dominant alpha characteristics that will also facilitate the communication process. But even the interaction itself plays apart in how you come looking out of it.

it just means that when you do enter this space you are doing so strategically and with specific intention.The Best of TSBMAG. relaxed countenance that responds to conversation with a natural smile looks of alertness and interest. practice them. 44 . The second way to practice facial expressions is with the aid of a video camera. if you leave the "casual personal" space of the other person. Intimate space is normally defined as an 18 inch bubble around the entire body of the other person. There are two solid ways to work on facial expressions. Whether seated or standing you should stay out of the other person's intimate space. This is more "real" than looking in a mirror as you will have the opportunity to see all of your habits in action. Do you find that people often ask you what's wrong? Even when you're completely content? If so it means that you need to seriously work on your facial expressions. And these are "features" that are within your control. The first is to stand in front of a mirror and try out different expressions. sparkling eyes. If you are attempting to communicate well with a female in business or a social setting. Similarly. This is the ideal way because by videotaping yourself in a social situation you get to see how your face naturally contorts while in conversations. Keep performing them over and over again until it feels natural for your face to contort to those specific expressions. This doesn't mean you can't lean in to share a secret with him or her. When you are communicating with another person you need to be consciously aware of your facial expressions and hand gestures. A pleasant. A smile not always changes the way people respond to you. which is 19 inches to 4 feet.COM If you are attempting to persuade another man you should be sitting across from each other. and an attentively tilted head are all looks that gain universal approval. you also stand the risk of losing the focus of the client. Entering this space is done so at your own risk. you should be seated across from her at a smaller more intimate table. These are the first thing someone notices about you during conversation. When you find the ones that look best. but if positively changes your internal chemistry.

It is much more graceful and relaxing to cup your hands together. models. unfavorable expressions. It is at this point that the use of a mirror will come in handy. It is incredible how much we don't know about ourselves until we carefully study ourselves on film. the guy who uses flailing. jerking or broad movements pushes people away be defining large space around off limits. and eye contact habits that you may want to work on. posture. This is exactly the kind of training movie stars. and from side to side by the width of your shoulders. The use of a video camera can also really help you identify the body language. and musicians go through with their stylists and publicist. Now you have specific goals that you want to achieve in regards to your facial expressions. and perfect your smile. This is why you must be conscious of what your hands are saying.Social Superstar Once you've identified the habits that you want to change. We will notice things that will probably make us feel embarrassed or ashamed. darting. But it is imperative that you face this. nervous gestures such as tapping your fingers on a table and picking at your face or nails can make you look insecure. Trust me. For instance. Using your hands Some people talk with their hands. You need to be your own publicist. You can continue this process several times until you get rid of all of your nervous ticks. People from across the room can observe you and learn a lot about you by the way you use your hands in conversation. and overcome it. and then once again have someone record you in a social situation. Likewise. then you must find new expressions to replace them with. Work on it. 45 . There is a lot that can be communicated with the hands. this will be an uncomfortable exercise for most of us. Hand gestures generally take place in a square area defined up and down by the waist to the neck.

and have performed some speaking engagements or received some media coverage relating to the subject. With this definition… in all likelihood. anyone can become an “expert” on any subject in a short period of time. you would need to belong to several trade organizations. This means that in order to coin yourself an expert in say. so that we know how to approach and deal with them. the testimonials they have. the real estate world. It is known that girls use this tactic all of the time in bars and clubs to make their judgments on guys. Building Your Social Resume If you use the above formula for “becoming an expert” and apply it to “becoming a social superstar” you will quickly see your social status sky rocket! We human beings don’t have the time or energy to really dig deeply to find out the truth about someone… so we look for the clues that will make these judgments easy for us. Building an online social resume allows you influence many more people with much less effort. Your Plan: In The Four Hour Work Week Tim Ferriss points out that in today’s world the definition of an expert is largely created through the affiliations he or she belongs to. I believe that you should view your social life in the same way. and the appearances they’ve made. We want to be able to quickly classify a person into a certain group. have a bunch of happy customers .COM Chapter 4: Building Your Social Resume Your Objective: The objective of building your social resume is to create massive social proof for yourself.and then put that social proof on auto-pilot. This is why it is taught in the community that you need to create social proof through being the most social guy in 46 .The Best of TSBMAG.

A couple months ago Mike Stoute. Immediately after attending the event. Do you think that created some instant social proof? We never even had to bring it up in a conversation. You affiliate with other rockstars.Social Superstar the place and then using routines and stories in your conversations that further exemplify your high social status. Within hours of changing our Facebook status to “Partying at the Playboy Mansion” we each had girls we hadn’t spoken to in years leaving us comments and emails with questions like “How did you guys get in the party?” “I heard that it was a private party. who do you know?” and so on. While I completely agree with this theory… I believe that you should take it a step further and position yourself as a Rockstar. The results were immediate. Pete. I was further solidifying my position as a Rockstar. If you want to be viewed as a Social Rockstar… become one! Elements of the resume 47 . and you make appearances at the right venues. the news of our adventure in the Mansion had already spread like wildfire… and we’re continually pressed and praised about it. as someone would inevitably ask us about it. and I plastered our Facebook pages with the pictures. Mike. Sure I had a vague curiosity to party at the Mansion… but I knew it wouldn’t be nearly as fun as some of my rendezvous in Brazil. you get testimonials. How do you do this? You do this the same way a so-called expert builds his resume. and wrote detailed accounts of the experience that we emailed all of our friends. Last week when we attended a reunion at our former college. or even this past Mansformation Weekend. twittered the news. and I added to our social resume when we attended the party at Playboy Mansion. Then why did I trek across the country to go there? Simple. The value in the trip to the Mansion wasn’t the girls we were going to hit on there. and the stories we are now able to continually tell about the experience. The value came from the pictures we took. It is a simple theory really. Pete the Freshman.

proof comes from your associations. Associations: The people you are perceived to hang out with. Remember. You have to view your Facebook friends as a master marketer views his list. 48 . and your appearances. Facebook is your list.facebook. The testimonials are easy to get… if you’re living the life. For example. and a list is what connects a marketer to his customers. a list is what creates sales… a list is what spreads word of mouth. If you're on Facebook simply send me a friend request: http://www. This is because it is more important to create the image of… then to be consistently living it. Appearances: The places you are perceived to be spending your time. Once you have a platform for showcasing your “proof” you need to start acquiring it. your testimonials. To a marketer.The Best of TSBMAG.mention this manuscript and I will send you a link to an hour long podcast I did with Race de Preist on effectively using Facebook to meet women. If you couple these pictures with another group of pictures from one other exclusive event… you’ll be perceived as the kind of guy who regularly attends these sorts of events. If you don’t have an account…GET ONE! You have to view these accounts as your publicity machine. my pictures from the Mansion create the image of a guy who is invited to high profile-hard to get into parties. These two accounts (I prefer Facebook) will be constantly marketing your unique selling points. This is an area you do not want to slack off in.COM The number one tool that you have in creating your social resume is your Facebook and Myspace accounts. people will naturally be talking about you and leaving comments on your page.php?id=515434783 When I receive your friend You probably noticed that I used the word perceived in the above definitions. I could write an entire post about the specifics of creating your Facebook or Myspace profile. If you’re new to it Race and Kelly give a couple fantastic tips for getting hot girls to leave comments on your page. but you’re better off learning from an expert. Testimonials: What other people are saying about you. 49 .php?af=795295 Remember: Befriend me on Facebook and I will send you an hour long podcast that goes much more into detail on the subject of using Facebook for meeting women and building your social Superstar http://www. http://www.

you must never verbally tell them or act in a way that you feel you are superior to them and will leave them behind. The attitude you present to the world should establish you as a likeable person. Building up your inner game will be make you the kind of person people like to be around. It is important to remember that other people must be lead to believe this on their own. not only in your mind. you must first be fully aware of how you intend on looking. but down on paper as well. acting. This must all be completely fleshed out. It should convey that you are so focused on your own goals. 50 . The attitude and values you possess on the inside will directly relate to the way you are perceived on the outside. Your attitude should convey the fact that you "are going places" and probably won't be around this scene forever. Your attitude should sub consciously tell the people within your scene that you are a scarce commodity. You need to have a clear vision of your end result if you intend on getting there. passions. feeling.The Best of TSBMAG. Your Plan: Decide exactly what kind of guy you want to be If you really intend on changing your identity and thriving in a social world. Once you create a well-thought out. thinking. You must ask yourself the critical questions: What would my "new self" think in this situation? What would he say? How would he act? And at all times you need live and breathe that identity. and being. and commitments that your time is extremely limited.COM Chapter 5: The Attitude (liking + scarcity) Your Objective: The objective of your attitude is to establish both liking and scarcity.description of the person you intend on becoming… you need to keep this vision in your mind as often as possible.

The positive memories create the foundation of your confidence. As much as people say "repeat I'm confident over and over" that will not work unless you have some cold hard facts to back it up. doubts. 51 . If you quit something before finishing it… instead of saying "I'm a failure" simply say. Anchor vibrant energetic states Personally I find most aspects of NLP unhelpful and annoying… but I have found a great use for the idea of anchoring vibrant energetic states. when asking yourself how "the new you" would act… you can factor in the quality of perseverance. ask yourself "what did I learn" and write down your answer in as a positive statement. and second guessing. will be added to this list. It is your job to not only be concentrating your mind on being this person…. And in the future. You need to collect as many of these memories and write them down as vividly and descriptively as possible. By creating this list. As for your mistakes and failures… as they come along. you in essence backing up your claim that you are confident and allowing yourself to act that way without feeling like a fraud. "I learned that success comes from perseverance" And then add that to the quality of the kind of guy you want to be if it isn't already listed. All of the negative memories we are going to leave behind. Every accomplishment you achieve. There is no use re-living them. But in order to maintain the qualities that uniquely make you… you. This will be a never ending habit. You've already learned everything you need to learn from them. Then forget the failure and move on. no matter how big or small. You'll notice that as the list grows. but actively acting in the way you'd imagine this person to act. Focus on your past successes instead of failures In the quest to reinvent your identity you'll need to leave behind the failures. you'll need to take with you your previous successes and accomplishments. so will your confidences. Were you the spelling bee champion in the 2nd great? Did you hit the winning home run in a little league game? Score a hot chick? Tell a funny joke? These are going to form your new identity.Social Superstar Many books will tell you to merely think it enough… and you're subconscious will magically turn you into him.

the core attribute your looking to build upon is your sense of self worth and confidence.The Best of TSBMAG. and I used to listen to the same songs over and over while I ran on the treadmill at the gym. I was unconsciously anchoring these songs to a feeling of an adrenaline rush. your confidence is increased. making it that much easier to have another success. It is extremely hard to get into state when you're tired. stomach ache. During that period of raised confidence it is important to attempt to achieve another form of success. This is the foundation for everything. We've already talked about focusing on past success. run down. I later found that if I listened to these songs. You should continually be building on every success you have. Without knowing it. but I haven’t been able to do that… so I wouldn't want to give you advice that I cannot personally verify as being true. Never be content with just one success. My Ipod only had a few songs on it at the time. For some strange reason the universe loves the concept of momentum… and slumps. Whenever you have a success. then it would go without saying that the one of the most important aspects of self confidence is peak physical health. Experience Peak Health If self confidence and esteem really come from the inside out. have a headache. 52 . The more vibrant and energetic we feel inside. If you are interested in learning more about anchoring check out a book on the subject. You need to keep the success momentum going. runny nose. and creating a success journal… but you also need take advantage of the momentum that each success brings. There are people who claim to be able to anchor specific feelings to a certain touch. the more likely we are to radiate these traits outward. or soreness. I tended to bring back that exercise high I used to only experience at the gym. while standing or moving around. I played them more often during the point of the work out where my adrenaline was peaked. Because certain songs tended to pump me up. cough. If you have a good conversation with a girl at bar.COM I came across this idea by accident. before leaving the bar instigate a few more conversations. Build on little successes In the beginning of your identity make over.

exercise provides you with an opportunity to anchor vibrant states to yourself as we spoke of earlier. If you're on vacation… you still go. If you find yourself consistently making excuses as to why you missed a workout. Instead of having a Taylor ham and cheese bagel and coffee for breakfast. your level of motivation. and your 53 . get in the habit of eating oatmeal and Green tea." This saying has a lot of truth to it. Eating healthy Exercise is critical. your mind will often follow right behind it. Eating healthy. This means there are no excuses. Look at is simply as the way you eat. you still go.. gassy. and unmotivated. Exercise 2. greasy. You will find that once you get into a consistent exercise habit your confidence will begin to sky rocket. Also. The trick to starting an exercise and healthful eating habit is to make it a must. You'll often feel bloated.. If you're hung over… you still go. The two keys to peak health: 1. the easier it will become.Social Superstar This is why it is important to treat your body like a temple. Once you break your old pattern you will find that the oatmeal fills you up just as much as the bagel and the Green Tea energizes you more than the coffee. you will begin to accept this behavior from yourself. The more discipline you prove you have to yourself. Even without the long term health benefits of changing your diet and exercise you will feel an immediate benefit in the amount of energy you possess. Don't look at it like you're on a diet. tired. like exercise has to be a must. If your body is run down from eating badly and not exercising. the clarity of your mind. Taco Bell. and Chinese food… your body will respond accordingly. every day you find time to get to the gym. pizza. You must force yourself to change your diet permanently. If its snowing out. If you are consistently filling up on McDonalds. There is a saying "you are what you eat. Think about the last time you finished off a Big Mac or a big dish of General Tso's… did you feel like you could conquer the world? Did you feel attractive? Many people don't realize that a big source of their depression stems from their lack of physical health.

This will keep you motivated and inspired. Well Dressed I discovered this principle when I was working as a paint contractor. I would look in the mirror and see a scruffy. I used to have the mentality that if I'm not going to see anyone. in dirty clothes. they would wash up. Later in the day when it was time to leave. At first I never understood why they bothered. But this was a horrible mentality to have. I soon discovered that I was often depressed and felt very discouraged with myself. fixing my hair nice. what is the point of shaving.The Best of TSBMAG. in nice clothes. In the chapter on making yourself more attractive I gave many hints on how you can increase your physical attractiveness. These benefits carry over into all areas of your life. Stay Well Groomed. and change back into their nice clothes before heading home. they would change into their work clothes. even when no one is watching. Say yes to yourself As children we so often hear the word "no" or "you can't" that we grow up inflicting ourselves with these words. or wearing nice clothes. plucking my eyebrows. This is how they separated themselves from their job." 54 . Because my job entailed me to where old painter's clothes and often find myself covered in paint… I would often decide that it wasn't worth shaving. When we want to buy something we want a voice appears in our head saying "no you can't afford that" or "shouldn't you buy something more useful?" When we want to talk to a girl or apply for a job a voice in our head says "don't. What I noticed though was that a couple of my Spanish employees would come to work every day looking sharp. Because the one and only person you really need to impress is yourself. But then I came to understand that this was how they kept their dignity. or keeping up my appearance the day's I was working. and would feel like that was all I was. What I want you to get out of this section is that it is always important to look and feel your best. unkempt guy. Then once they got to work. trimming my nose hairs. tanning. doing my hair.COM increased pride in yourself discipline. You need to look in the mirror and be proud of how you come across.

"You're too young" "You only wind up breaking it" "You'll hurt yourself" "You'll lose it" "You have to be fair" "You can't afford it. We tell ourselves all of the same excuses that our parents told us.Social Superstar We are unconsciously embedding the word no into our minds. Crutches are things that we use to avoid reality. how much would this have improved your life? It only takes one great employer to give you a chance despite your shoddy resume." "You can get it next year" How can you ever get what you really want if you are your own biggest obstacle in achieving it? The step to reversing this is to practice saying yes to yourself. While there is nothing wrong with having a hobby… the problem arises when you hide yourself in your hobby. or one beautiful women to fall in love with you. For some guys their crutch is video games. for some guys it fantasy football. This means that quitting a dead end part time job and focusing 100% on your dream. If you didn't have yourself in your ear telling you "no" how many more girls would you have approached? How many more classes would you have taken? Jobs applied for? Friends made? Even if you only achieved a fraction of the extra dreams you went for. It will reshape the way you live your life. It means going for broke. It also means eliminating your crutches…. or apply yourself. some guys its porn. It means cutting off your "booty call" and finding a girl that inspires you. and bam your life is changed. This will set precedence. Apply for a job that you have no qualifications for. or one professor to see your hidden brilliance in a subject. 55 . They are the place that we crawl back to avoid facing defeat in other areas. Order whatever it is you want on the menu regardless of price. or our teachers or relatives told us.. Whatever it is that we want we are often the first person to talk ourselves out of it. Eliminate Your Crutch/Burn Your Ships To fully develop unstoppable inner game and the winning attitude it is necessary to burn our ships and get rid of our crutches. Get in the habit of allowing yourself to have the things you want. Do you really enjoy playing World of Warcraft 7 hours a day… or is it easier than admitting to yourself that you're scared to talk to girls.

close friends. it is just important that you push yourself past it daily. Push yourself past your comfort zone daily Look at yourself like a rubber band. I knew deep inside that if I kept working there I would stay comfortable and never achieve my goals of running a successful business or publishing a book. All was always good there. or got frustrated with the screenplay I was writing. think outside the box. If you don't have the opportunity to initiate an extra conversation. How do you achieve this? This push yourself one step further every day. Life will no longer seem repetitive. Embrace Your Passions 56 .COM The hardest thing I ever had to do a few years back was quit the restaurant I was working in. and dates) but it also meant eliminating my crutch. Not only does this help you grow as a person. then say something unexpected in one of the conversations you are involved in. At the time. If you're going to the gym. I would head over to the restaurant and drink with my buddies. friends.The Best of TSBMAG. Yet. and then burn them. and unlimited females to interact with and date. Try something zany even if it doesn't work this time it will train your mind to look for new ways of doing things. crank out an extra rep or two. If you're working on a project. whenever I experienced a set back at the real estate agency I was working at. Quitting the job not only meant burning my ships (as the job provided me with money. It is important that you push yourself past at least one comfort zone daily. The objective is to stretch yourself into the largest and greatest rubber band of all time. You won't feel trapped. It doesn't matter what your comfort zone is any area. run an extra minute. Things won't get boring. Say something that surprises you.. The job provided me with a solid wad of cash every week. make an effort to initiate one more conversation every day. You have to find out what your ships and crutches are. If you are trying to conquer shyness. You'll begin to look forward to each day as you'll find yourself continually surprising yourself. add a bit more resistance. but it makes your life exciting.

Don't jump at the first thought that comes into your mind. set a goal to visit another place. or paint. Only Seek Approval from Yourself Many people misinterpret the advice to "not care what people think" to be advice recommending living a slovenly. When you find something that drives you… go with it. and then envision yourself in different scenarios. You might find that hour becomes your most cherished of the day. they'll decide something completely different. but plant the seed of passion in your mind. Maybe they decide they want to write children's books. or volunteer for worthy causes. The trick is to find whatever you would do if time and money were not an object and do it now. energizing reason to get out of bed every morning does amazing things for your self esteem. withdrawn. Let it drive you. or write music. you might not be able to do it in the same capacity now. or open a bar where they know everyone. or travel the world. Really dwell on it. Once you visit that place. This is not the case. If you would write children's books… start writing one now. Really get inside your mind. What sparks you? Most people think if they won that kind of money that they would want to retire on a beach somewhere… but often when they really think of it. But in this section I just want to remind you that the more inspired you are on the inside. Let it power you. If you don't live up to your own standards. In Tim Ferriss's book The Four Hour Work Week he gives an exercise called Dreamlining which allows you to see approximately how much money you will need to make to finance your dreams. Having a solid. Sure. If you want to travel the world… pick one place right now and set a goal to visit it. imagine you have this money. the more it shows on the outside. In a later chapter I have reproduced that exercise for you. this freedom. How do you find your passion? Think to yourself "what would I be doing if I suddenly won $150 million in the lottery. unproductive life. You'll often find that achieving life goals and dreams doesn't cost nearly as much as you think. or train for the Olympics. Spend an hour every night writing.Social Superstar I will go more into detail about embracing your passions in the section on being an interesting person. then you're letting yourself down. 57 . You are the only judge of what is important for you.

This is not advice to be selfish. 58 . It is simply advice to live life on your terms and not let the whims of the masses affect your ability to make decisions.COM You can't please everyone. the more you wind up pleasing no one. The first and foremost person you need to please is yourself. And the more you try to please everyone.The Best of TSBMAG.

which ultimately you must do to demonstrate that you are cool.Social Superstar Chapter 5: Be Captivating (liking + scarcity + authority) Your Objective: In order to be interesting. They want to be led. People are like sheep.the kind of person that people want to be around. They are most fascinated and attached to what they can't have.Be Cool.but decided that cool is subjective and people might not understand it as a standalone definition. above all you must be likeable. The second weapon of influence you must use is that of scarcity. And most importantly they want someone to look up to. They want to be told what to do. Looking cool is a good way to get people to take notice. scarcity. Your Plan: I was originally going to call this chapter. What makes someone cool? Well everything we talked about in the previous chapter “Look the Part” definitely plays a huge part in appearing cool. The final ingredient to being captivating is possessing a sense of authority. And how do you demonstrate that you are cool? Be interesting! 59 . People get bored and uninterested in what is always around. These weapons are liking. If they don't like you. You must get other people to like must convey three weapons of influence. captivating or cool. But looking cool doesn’t make you cool. If you want to be captivating. and authority. your influence over them will run thin… and you will also not enjoy yourself around them nearly as much.

this is the easiest to immediately implement. surfing. collecting comic books. We can choose anything. fantasy football.COM Wallflowers are rarely cool. volunteer relief aid work. Why? Because as pretty as they can be… they’re usually like talking to a wall. snowboarding. While they all can be fun and rewarding… how interesting do these hobbies make you appear to other people? What if your hobbies included: Playing in a cover band. or golf as a hobby. World of Warcraft. What we choose to make our hobbies is our choice. Some people will take this the wrong way and think they have to load up on useless facts and knowledge… ala Mystery’s “Did you know fish cough?” routine. tango dancing. Some people choose playing Halo 3. rock climbing. world travel. While devouring interesting facts and storing them away for appropriate times can make you sound interesting and does play a small part in a Social Superstar repertoire…it is more important that you be interesting. hacking into highly secured computer networks. So how do you “be interesting” you ask? Here are some traits of interesting people that we will explore further: Interesting hobbies Interesting profession Contradictory character traits The dirty little secret Fearless Says less than necessary No where you’re going Never appear too perfect Have interesting hobbies Out of all of the traits. If you want to be a Social Superstar it is crucial that you become the most interesting person in the room. There just doesn’t seem to be anything deeper than the pretty exterior.The Best of TSBMAG. or race car driving? Do you think other people would take a tad bit more interest in you? 60 .

You may ask what is more interesting about surfing than golf. It’s not.Social Superstar Your immediate reaction might be to say that simply faking an interest in a hobby is enough. what personality traits do you associate with someone who spends their free time surfing. playing in a cover band. The hobby itself is not what makes you interesting. It is your choice to pursue that hobby which makes you interesting. or traveling the world? Maybe words like: Adventurous Passionate 61 . There is nothing fundamentally fascinating about rock climbing. This is a guy who goes against the grain. A guy who chooses to learn and compete in tango dancing competitions is an oddity. Are you starting to get the idea? What you choose to make your hobby tells other people a lot about your personality. Merely going through the motions of rock climbing. or struggling to surf. You need to develop passion for these things. How many girls admire your dedication to World of Warcraft? How many of those same girls would admire your dedication to volunteering to perform relief work after various catastrophes? What you choose to do with your free time says more about you then anything that comes out of your mouth. Your hobbies give other people the ability to make a snapshot judgment of your personality traits. or flying around the world is not enough. This is where the value of this lesson comes in. This is a guy who marches to the beat of a different drummer. You need to develop a passion for them that radiates from within your core being. It is actually pretty boring to watch. And most people are compelled to know why? How many people are genuinely curious as to why you spend your free time shuffling around your fantasy football roster? Not many I would assume. What would personality traits would most people attach to someone whose hobby was following major league sports or playing video games or golf? Now. But there is something unique and interesting about the type of guy who chooses to spend his free time rock climbing while his friends are sitting in front of a computer playing video games.

My first recommendation is to choose a few things that you have a genuine interest for groups in your area. In the late Randy Pausch’s Last Lecture he talks about rediscovering your childhood dreams as a way to bringing fulfillment to your life. you’re likely to find a group of people that have made a hobby out of the same exact thing to share experiences with. What were some of your childhood dreams you gave up on? Did you want to be an archeologist like Indiana Jones. Are you a sheep? 62 . It is amazing what you find when you begin to step outside of your comfort zone. The best way to find out the potential of turning one of your childhood dreams into a current hobby is to begin by searching around the internet. Finding new. and interesting hobbies is not as hard as it may seem. These new acquaintances might open your eyes to entirely new horizons. You can run a general Google search and see what comes up. They are a rare commodity in a world where most people act like mindless sheep following along with the herd. a space explorer. you can run a Yahoo Groups or Google Groups search and see if there is already a group of people discussing it. And even better.COM Free spirited Thrill seeking Interesting people are often associated with these sorts of words.The Best of TSBMAG. Most people are confined to the day to day activities that make up their comfort zone. rock star? Who says you can’t be? In our times it is possible to make a hobby out of any possible thing you may have an interest in. determination. It is their drive. you can search meetup. and ability to live life outside the comfort zone that is so fascinating to us. This is what makes these “interesting” people so extraordinary. Take some time for a moment and think about the kind of words people would use to describe you. The wonderful thing about entering one of these groups is that it presents you with an opportunity to meet new and exciting people that you normally would not have come in contact with. cave dweller. or you can visit specialized travel sites to see what kind of adventure travel they offer. computer hacker. exciting.

and list up to five things you dream of having (including. For some. as most will. Most people quit a fitness routine a few weeks after beginning. The sad truth is that most people don’t even finish a book that they startlet alone persist long enough to make it to the finals of a surf competition in Hawaii. for others fortune or prestige. And most people don’t travel out of their state – let alone backpack across South East Asia. etc. If you pick a hobby that continually challenges you and forces you to continually dig deep inside to persist… you will grow as a person. and doing (visiting Thailand. don't put down solving world hunger out of guilt.” Others will call it “maturity. etc. For now.) in that order.let alone climb to the top of Mount Everest. If you really want a Ferrari.” No matter what name you give it the results are the same. Some people call this “developing character. racing ostriches. Do not limit yourself. etc. consider what you hate or fear in each and write down the opposite. You will seem to possess a wisdom normally reserved for wise old men. I am going to take the next section directly from Tim Ferriss's book and urge you follow this advice and create your dreamlines. but it will also help you understand the means it will take to achieve your dreams. If you have difficulty identifying what you want in some categories. but not limited to.Social Superstar There are more benefits to exploring a new and exciting hobby other than being perceived as interesting. and do not concern yourself with how these things will be accomplished. tracing your roots overseas. material wants: house. car. What would you do if there was no way you could fail? If you were 10 times smarter than the rest of the world Create two timelines. Dreamlining In Tim Ferriss's brilliant book "The Four Hour Work Week" he gives a phenomenal exercise that will not only help you develop your passion. its unimportant. Be sure not to judge or fool yourself. the dream will be fame. be fluent in Chinese. clothing. This is an exercise in reversing repression. There is a certain amount of unsaid respect and admiration for the man or woman who does these things. You will be looked as sort of an authoritative figure. All people have their vices and 63 . being (be a great cook.).6 months and 12 months.).

fill in the five "doing" spots with the following: • • • • • One place to visit One thing to do before you die (memory of a lifetime One thing to do daily One thing to do weekly One thing you've always wanted to learn What does "being" entail doing? Convert each "being" into a "doing" to make it actionable.The Best of TSBMAG. People find it easier brainstorm "being" first. most people have a lot of trouble coming up with the defined dreams they're being held from. but this column is just a temporary spot for "doing" actions. If something will improve your feeling of self worth. consider these questions: a) What would you do. Here are a few examples: Great cook = make Christmas dinner without help Fluent in Chinese = have a five minute conversation with a Chinese coworker What are the four dreams that would change it all? Using the six month timeline. Identify an action that would characterize this state of being or task that would mean you have achieved it. This is particularly true with the "doing" category.think about if for a few minutes. day to day. star or otherwise highlight the four most exciting and/or important dreams from all the columns. Repeat the process with the 12 month timeline if desired.COM insecurities. Drawing a blank? For all their bitching about what's holding them back. In that case. put it down. If still blocked. if you had $100 million in the bank? b) What would make you excited to wake up in the morning to another day? Don't rush. 64 .

complete the three actions in the "now" column. If you fall into the unglamorous and mundane… do not be defined by your work. CIA agent. Do it now.Social Superstar Determine three steps for each of the four dreams in just the six month timeline and take the first steps now.” or name any other job too many times you begin to identify yourself with your job. I generally set 3-month and six month dreamlines. For the continuation of this exercise pick up a copy of "The Four Hour Work Week" or visit fourhourworkweek. tomorrow and the day after. CEO of a fortune 500 company. The variable change too much and in-the future distance becomes an excuse for postponing Have an Interesting Profession This one is a lot more difficult to control than finding an interesting hobby. Define three steps for each dream that will get you closer to its actualization. I'm not a believer in long-term planning and far-off goals. But for the rest of us. If not rachet it down.” or “I’m a real estate agent. Each should be simple enough to do in five minutes or less. and living like a superstar. to outline every step from start to finish. You are much more than your occupation. we are cutting ourselves short. actor. let's focus on those critical first steps. 65 . The truth is we all have to earn a living. Far too many people let their jobs define who they are as a person. This happens after years of naming your current profession when asked “what do you do?” If you say “I’m a painter. therefore. This is a good introduction to dreamlining and illustrates how it can create the needed momentum to set you on the right direction towards achieving your life goals. In fact. well-defined actions-for now. Once you have three steps for each of the four goals. but to define the end goal. And very few jobs are glamorous. the required vehicle to achieve them and build momentum with critical first steps. The objective of this exercise isn't.” or “I’m tech support. I would never recommend choosing a profession simply because it sounds glamorous. Identifying yourself with your job is fine if you’re a rock star. But why not choose a profession that genuinely interests you? Chances are if it genuinely interests you… it probably is interesting to other people as well. First. or astronaut. Set actions-simple.

Hobbies tell more about you anyway… because they are what you choose to do on your free time. music. In the pickup/seduction community there is a lot of talk about demonstrating higher value. I’ve made a short list of examples below: • • • • • • • FBI Agent Firefighter Archeologist Any job in film. Do not kid yourself into believing that you don’t. I would recommend at the very least finding a job that you’re passionate about. street artist… and so on. or television Airline pilot Reporter (for legitimate magazine or newspaper) Public Speaker These are just few of the better paying jobs.The Best of TSBMAG. but it is a vehicle for putting your charisma and enthusiasm on display. Even if the job sounds like the most boring job on the planet. I simply want to point out the fact that if you’re in a boring.COM I could spend fifty pages trying to talk you into following your dream profession and why it is completely possible that you attain it… but that is beyond the scope of this book. So while the job itself might not be glamorous… you will appear glamorous performing it. If you’re starting from scratch and a curious about some examples of interesting jobs. mundane. Passion is not only contagious. I would spend more energy on finding interesting hobbies. skydiving instructor. There are countless examples of interesting lower paying jobs out there like tour guide. death trap of job… you have options. that will shine through. Interesting Skills A social superstar has the keen ability to keep everyone in the room focused on him. if you are truly passionate about it. I would concentrate more on finding a job that you’re passionate about rather than choosing a job strictly for conversation pieces. If you've follow the advice laid out above in regards to discovering your passions and creating hobbies 66 .

realize that was the card. and gathering that will make you stand out from the crowd. The Sniffing Card Trick This trick requires a silent partner. For some guys it takes awhile to fully integrate themselves into a new hobby or passion to the point that they feel it will benefit them in social gatherings. He would sell the trick well by really smelling the cards and acting as if he was looking for a clue on the card. Daryl would tell the person to pick out one of the cards. it is important to pick skills that are congruent with your personality. My two friends Daryl and Kevin pulled this off for years in college without anyone ever catching onto it. As with all of the different skills I will list. I saw Daryl perform the trick countless times and no one ever figured it out. Daryl would notice Kevin scratching his nose. I am going to list this trick along with several other types of skills and routines you can learn to captivate an audience. He would then lay out 7 cards on a table or floor.Social Superstar around them. Other Magic Tricks I have never been big on magic tricks. I'm not 67 . Daryl would leave the room while the person chose the card. In my college days I had two good friends Daryl and Kevin who mastered one simple card trick that had audiences captivated every time they performed it. He would then invite someone to take part in the trick. Magic tricks worked for Mystery because he was genuinely passionate about magic. continue his performance for a bit. While everyone's attention was on Daryl. For these guys. bars. I suggest taking the advice of some of the most popular dating coaches and gurus and learn some routines that you can bust out at parties. but with the popularity behind them do to legendary pick up artist Mystery. Basically Daryl would pull out a deck of cards and shuffle them around for a bit. you will most likely already be developing some interesting traits and skills that are all your own. When Daryl came back to the room he would begin sniffing each card. and eventually choose the right card. Kevin would subtly scratch his nose when Daryl sniffed the right card. show it to everyone in the room and then put it back in the row of 7 cards. there must be a place for them in this book. It was a trick that they worked together on. and never revealed the secret of how they accomplished it until years later.

Think Jessie's Girl. The long haired.The Best of TSBMAG.tsbmag. they will try to appease you. The trick to this is to learn one song that most cover bands will know… and love to play. and boat loads of and purchase some of the tricks that the pros use on stage. which will allow them to charge more money for their appearances. and how much you miss being up on stage.. in hopes that you will encourage your crew to be their new You can also view more magic trick videos by going to Youtube and searching "magic tricks. just getting over a really bad break up…" and 5 out of 10 times the band will invite you on stage to sing the song. Most cover bands are just looking to build a following. They 68 . all swooning over the shitty cover band up on stage. You're a fun social guy though. maybe a round of shots. If they sense that you're the kind of guy who rolls with a large entourage." If you are serious about learning magic and want to try your skills with some more professional tricks you can go to www. www. co-workers.tsbmag. make up some bullshit about "leaving town. If you believe that magic tricks are something that you would like to add to your repertoire of skills you can find some videos of a few good ones on our companion site.. and men want to be friends with. Learn to Play or Sing one song You're at a bar.COM saying that you have to have a desire to be a magician to perform magic http://www. If the band doesn't seem to be biting. During one of the set breaks you start bullshitting with the http://www. There is also a wonderful resource for guys looking to use magic to improve their game called PUMA Skills. John Bon Jovi wanna be seems to have his pick of the litter tonight.penguinmagic. Play to their egos. your birthday. introduce them to some of your hot female friends. You casually mention how you sing "insert song you've practiced a million times" really well. but you must have some real interest in the subject matter. its jampacked with friends.tsbmag. The kind of guy women want to fuck. buy them all a drink.

There is no reason you both can't share the stage for a moment. Practice it often. Just find one of your more talented friends or family members to teach you the song. Just simply refuse… tell them you don't want to steal the thunder from the party. Which really comes down to mastering a few chords. some people will scream for you to play another song. Why not blow them away with something really good? Most people study for years to get really good at the guitar. You are not to tell anyone about your ability to sing. You also need to have a good stage presence. Sure. you best rock the house. But you don't have to get really good. Best of all… you leave the social encounter on a high note. When the party rolls around feel free to strum away. It is important to master the one that comes most naturally to you. and some party goer will wow everyone with his rendition of chop sticks from Big. When you get on stage to kick ass with the band… it is should come as total shock… which will amplify the effect. This means that you have to spend a fair amount of time perfecting this one song. Practice in front of a mirror." You'll come off as modest.Social Superstar want to be social superstars too. with your audience wanting more! The Superstar's Guide to Being Funny There are many different types of humor. and record it so that you can listen and fine tune. Make it the staple of your karaoke choices. Sometimes parties will have stray guitars or pianos. 69 . You just have to get really good at playing one song. Video tape yourself and fine tune your body language and how you carry yourself on stage. This same idea can be applied to musical instruments as well. and make you seem just that much more naturally cool. Even throw in a line like "I'd play all night… but that wouldn't be fun for anyone else. Anybody with a little patience can spend a few days perfecting one song on the guitar or piano. The first criterion for this is that you have a decent voice and a good sense of rhythm. If you get up on stage. which is a pleasant characteristic of a super star.

Develop a character "Humor doesn't go into a character is comes out of him. or there tends to be a lot of uncomfortable silences after you deliver your lines… stop! You'll have an easier time just being the cool serious guy… then the unfunny jokester. You begin to expect a certain reaction. Let's use Vince Vaughn as an example." When you're watching one of his movies or listening to him speak in an interview. Everyone and I mean everyone loves being around someone that consistently makes them laugh. he just has to ask himself what would "a smart ass" say? It is important if you want to be funny that you have a character and that you stick with the character. That being said. And often times you'll find yourself laughing before he's said anything. you're simply a recite of jokes. Humor is a polarizing thing… while being funny can make you extremely popular… trying to be funny when you're not can crush your social dreams. Laughing feels good.The Best of TSBMAG. the easier it will be to infiltrate new social circles. If you sense that the people around you don't respond to your jokes. While I don't think that spur of the moment jokes can be taught to someone who doesn't naturally think that way. The humor actually flows more from the 70 ." If you think about the funniest performers most of them have at least one memorable character who makes you laugh before he even says anything… because you already know what his reaction will be. you can learn to recognize it. you can almost feel what his reaction will be before he makes it. A character needs a trademark or point of view that does not change. you can get laughs simply be being yourself. When he's responding to a question. or making an observation on something he's witnessing.COM Being funny is not a prerequisite for a social superstar (Being fun to be around is though. humor comes much more easily for him. With it. I do think that if you learn a little bit about humor. Think about the people you most enjoy spending time with… more than likely they will be the people that you laugh the most around.) The funnier you are. People hate bad comedy. Without a character. Because Vince Vaughn has really mastered this character. there is a lot of arguments over whether or not comedy can be taught. He has developed the character of "smart ass. Humor cannot be forced or it's uncomfortable. and put it out at appropriate times.

humor will naturally flow out of it. I was able to make that character work really well. do it for a little while. If you can get the character down. Or your character's interaction with your thoughts. Most funny people are not trying to be funny. Because once you "nail" the character. and responses than from the jokes. the straight man The guy who only wants to know what's in it for him A high maintenance chick The ultimate authority and commentator on wussy guys Imitating the women you're with Becoming devil's advocate and promoting bad behavior She needs adult supervision As you can see that by merely immersing yourself in any of these characters. You will probably find that they have a standard character that they have become. The ones David DeAngelo mentioned above are particularly good for dealing with women. They are actually "being" the character. The character is where 90% of the humor flows from. the interactions. Think about the funniest people you know. then all of the funny stuff starts taking care of itself. And they're not seeking approval. For many years I developed the character of "daddy. the humor will come with how the character is interacting with the world.Social Superstar character. No 71 . My whole character was the arrogant-what's in it for me. You can't go into character. It won't work if you approach it tentatively and try it… it will actually backfire. especially if they can tell you're trying to use it to get their approval. The humor comes from your characters interaction with the world. get a laugh… then leave it. If you keep trying to see if your audience likes it will probably backfire on you. Here are some roles that David DeAngelo recommends trying out or testing… The I'm superior to you character An assumed or fake position of authority The character of the victim of her seduction The cold guy." I based the humor off of Vince Vaughn. Or your characters interaction with another person. In order to make this concept work you must believe it and act congruently.jerk.

Read Books. and a whole lot of excess cash? Well. the tortured musician. Watching Movies.are you picturing formal suits and furrowed forehead? Long hours. Learn to see the world through his eyes." Best recourses to learn humor Watching standup comedy. Cocky comedy is the best type of humor for attracting women. the well situated power investment banker. This allows you to observe the reactions of those around you.The Best of TSBMAG. allowing funny sarcastic lines to flow out of you. or playing in a blues band on weekends." Cocky Comedy Course: David DeAngelo's cocky comedy course is a brilliant way to learn the art of cocky comedy. I'm not a firm believer that books can teach you how to be funny. Louie CK.COM matter what character you choose. you have to know fundamental people skills so that you are "liked. But your best bet is to head out often to the local theatre or club and watch some standup comedy live. the brainiac. And they’ll likely try to push you along into one. If you're one of those guys pick up the book "Comedy Writing Secrets. This 6 CD set will leave you with more material than you can begin to use. Some of the comedians you might want to study are Bill Burr. It lets you observe the power of delivery and timing. but a social superstar needs to transcend a type. and how people react to them. For instance. But they can teach you the underlying principles of what makes people laugh. Pay attention to his delivery. Have Contradictory Character Traits No one is less compelling than a person in life who acts like a million other characters you’ve encountered. It is easy to fall into this trap when building an image. 72 . because people love to classify people into types. Some guys need to understand things at a greater level before implementing something. that’s a good start for a character. lots of technical gadgets like a Blackberry. Also pay attention to the connections he makes. I've found that watching Vince Vaughn movies really helped me develop my sarcastic sense of humor. and you'll begin thinking like him. exhibiting only one facet: the alpha jock. If this is your type… maybe you can make yourself interesting by doing volunteer work with the humane society.

The dedicated business man had a thousand dollar a week coke habit. And there is nothing in life that peaks interest more than a swerve just when we thought we had something or someone all figured out. We all carry with us histories.Social Superstar These sorts of distinctions make you different from any other person that might fall into this type. not be spotting contrasts like stop signs along the road. letting the target feel like they have him all figured out. they seep into your being. The alpha male fucked a guy. our experiences. The ones that intrigue us most don’t come off as stereotypes or clichés. To understand more. ADVANCED: use with caution The Dirty Little Secret People love surprises. They slowly reveal things about themselves that keep us wondering what we will find out next. There is nothing in life that kills interest more than predictability. The best contrasts are so seamlessly sewn with your characterization that they’re not easy to spot. sometimes subtle. It is a completely refreshing change of pace. The most interesting characters in movies. Your observer should experience the tension. not a type but a real person. each of our bundles distinctively different from anyone else’s. other times greatly conflicting. or books are those who possess depth. People love being swerved when they least expect it. television. When you build an image. and our memories. explore the specific and unique details that will make you more complex. These contrasts provide endless opportunity to make yourself more complex. They make us want to know more. The innocent girl had sex with a stranger. story. They make us feel as if we’ve missed something all along. 73 . And they fascinate us. A great seducer does the same thing. These are all contradictions of character. The responsible teacher has fucked a hooker. And that feeling is invigorating. This means the nice guy admits he got rough with his last girlfriend. The three dimensional ones. or fact about themselves that is completely contradictory to the image they have put forward thus far. and then the seducer blind sides the target with an action. A fascinating element of human nature is that we all possess contrasting traits. He does this by leading his target in one direction.

And they will surrender to you for it. She proceeded to tell everyone in arm’s length about what happened. And in the end desire always wins out over reason. virtuous characteristics. where he would lose his temper completely. How many of our fantasies involve our teachers. What I am saying though is don’t hide what is there. prostitutes. He was socially unacceptable. although not proud of the indecent. He was one of the most laid back. You have to allow them to see all of your positive. you could ever meet. cousins. But suddenly he was a little more complex. He also happened to have a fuse that would occasionally go off. So by the time the story had come out. easy going guys. and then you drop the bomb. His ex girlfriend learned it a year into the relationship. My friend thought is social life was over on campus. Little did he know. I had a friend back in college. and have her end the relationship. I told 74 . He was now taboo. And you wait until that point where you sense they feel they have you figured out. He was dangerous. I had a job in a restaurant once. But danger is seductive. Sure when they talked about him to their friends they acted as if they disapproved of him. I was friendly with many of the girls there and talked open and honestly about my sexual experiences. They are dangerous. By introducing danger to your target you will make them feel alive. My friend didn’t have to do all of this because all of these girls knew him previously. laid back guy. and minors? These people are taboo. It makes us feel alive. The fact that they shouldn’t do it only made them want to do it more. lesbians. But in their mind they were captivated by him. You have to build rapport with your target. Now at the right moment you have to disclose this information. He literally had girls throwing themselves at him. friend’s girlfriends. nor do anything other socially unacceptable behavior.The Best of TSBMAG. They are frowned upon. He says of all the girls he told not one stopped seeing him. But it was enough to bruise her eye. it had just begun. They had known him for years as a nice. I am not saying to go out and hit your girlfriend. they all though they had him figured out. Not many people knew this side of him. or fuck a minor. single moms. I’m sure if you did deep enough into your past you can find something you’ve done that is a little taboo. continues years later to tell the story of that relationship to girls he meets. But the girls didn’t care. They got into a fight and he hit her just once. My friend.COM By nature we want what we are not supposed to have.

Social Superstar them about my love of Asian massage parlors. our fear of rejection. Most people are held back by various forms of fear. How refreshing is it when we meet someone who isn’t controlled by these fears? Women are attracted to bad boys. How ridiculous does that sound when you really think about it? 90% of the decisions that you make are influenced by your need for approval. I have a friend with an assault charge on his record. because bad boys provide an adrenaline rush that the average guy does not. Most fear stems from our need for approval. Most of us are working a job we hate. our fear of ruining our reputation. This is 75 . a woman sees a reflection of most of her fears and insecurities. We are held back by our fear of losing our job. Feel the fear. Live a fearless existence. If you want to stand out in a crowd. This is especially true if you are a naturally nice wholesome guy. none. most of our major fears are solely based on what thoughts someone else will have about us. What would your personality be like if you weren’t governed by all of these fears? If you take a look at the short list of our major fears… you’ll find that not one of them is life threatening. The dirty little secret is a great way to make you more desirable to a girl. Although the charge was bullshit. You guessed it. have given up our dreams… because we are afraid of making the wrong decision. Appear Fearless You’re fearless. And not one of them ever even made me where a condom. In the average guy. our fear of being laughed at. then do it anyway. our fear of making a mistake. How many stopped friend still found it morally necessary to tell every girl he was with afterwards about the charge right before he would sleep with them for the first time. Creating a little bit of an edge for yourself will work wonders for your sex appeal. In fact. lonely or in a shitty relationship. Most people suffer some form of anxiety disorder. Most people are insecure. and we’re not even afraid of the consequences of the wrong decision… We are afraid of what people will say about us… what people will think about us. Most of our fears are completely unwarranted. our fear of going broke. Did it stop me from fucking half the waitresses there? Hell no.

A Superstar does not confine himself to these fears. He realizes that short of death or serious injury… life goes on after 99. But the fact is. some people are scared of social gatherings. Whether the president was fending off missile crisis. cold approaching. Chances are you probably suffer from quite a few of those fears yourself. The bad boy makes her forget all about her fears and insecurities. no matter what the situation was. natural disasters. depriving themselves of true happiness. He takes her into his fearless existence. Most human beings go through their daily existence terrified. Appearing fearless is really the objective. Because they can sit and talk and wallow in their fears and insecurities together. What is a fearless existence? A fearless existence is one that is not governed by the illogical fears that most people hang onto their entire life. the heroes. If you do. heights. Some people are terrified of death. confrontation. he never showed eve one ounce of fear. 76 . What was so iconic about a person like John F Kennedy was that he always appeared so cool.9% of the situations you enter into. public speaking. and the superstars of this world… overcome their fears in the face of the public. poverty.COM why the average guy becomes her friend. no one is inherently fearless. terrorism. airplanes… and the list goes on. While it may seem difficult to "be fearless" it is not nearly as difficult to appear fearless. or bedding Marilyn Monroe. I am going to repeat a challenge that I laid out to you during our 31 Days to Better Game series last July. calm. The difference is that the bad boys. They find these characters exhilarating because they can't figure out how they can be so fearless. this might just be the hardest advice you will ever receive: You need to feel the fear.The Best of TSBMAG. and do it anyway. cold calling. People like their heroes and superstars to possess the traits and characteristics they most wish they had themselves. fighting for civil rights. and collective. the ocean. relationships.

and the more time they spend pondering. open-ended. they will continue to try to interpret and explain you. Do you want to call out of work and go the beach? Do it! Do you want to tell the counter girl at the bank that she’s sexy as hell? Do it! Do you want to finally change the style of your haircut? Jump out a plane? Get a tattoo? Have sex with a stranger? Do whatever the fuck you want! Whenever the fuck you want! Do this for just 2 days and experience the thrill of being fearless. Powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. the more interesting you will appear. the more common you appear. They find it necessary to know what you are thinking. You can often gain the control in a conversation by merely giving short answers and long pauses…simply because it will put the other person on the defensive. If you have a fear of flying… parachute out of an airplane. approach who you feel like approaching. or whatever other insignificant. After the two days you can go back to worrying about what people think. As long as you put up a guard by carefully controlling what you reveal. and the less in control. An extremely effective way to break through your fears is to tackle a really big one immediately. tell someone who has pissed you off to “fuck off. say what you feel like saying. 77 . Say Less Than Necessary The 4th Law of Power states: When you are trying to impress people with words. the more you say. the more likely you are to say something foolish. Human beings are curious creatures. or how you appear. They'll go home trying to figure out what happened in the conversation. You get my point. Even if you are saying something banal. The more you say. trivial reason is holding you back. it will seem original if you make it vague. and sphinxlike. If you have a fear of public speaking… go to a Toastmaster's meeting and give a five minute speech to a group of strangers.” do exactly what you want to do.Social Superstar Live the next two days of your life completely fearless. Just for the next two days. and they'll quickly try to fill the silence by nervously jumping in with comments that reveal valuable information about them and their weaknesses.

They look for other people to guide them and show them direction. If you want to be a social superstar you must not let others goad you into saying something that you will come to regret. Shy people like to think of themselves as noble… but in fact they are the most self indulgent people there are. or something that could be used against you. This is especially important when you are out drinking." but you've just given away your greatest bargaining tool. as everything you've worked for could be ruined by one night of diarrhea of the mouth. shyness is a sign of insecurity. This means you also must learn to handle your temper under pressure or when angry. Revealing too much not only serves to diminish the interest people have in you. And far from interesting. This also relates to a lot of the advice I give out regarding expressing your feelings toward a girl. and carefully choosing your words. Do not take this as an excuse to be shy or introverted. Once she knows how deeply you feel… the interest begins to diminish. you will wind up with a habit of letting your mouth write checks you can't cash. This is not noble… it is vain and reeks of self centeredness. Shyness is not interesting. As much satisfaction you might get from an uncontrolled outburst. the more interesting you appear to her. I used to spend way too much time thinking about what other people were thinking about me. there is a difference from being shy. Not the social superstar. I've long figured out that the less you say to a girl. I know because I used to be one. or not out for love… but the truth is. Yes. If you don't make it a habit of controlling the words that come out of your mouth. you may be tempted to blurt out "I love you. Know Where You're Going Most people wander through life aimlessly. In the heat of the moment. I've been accused of being heartless. the consequences will linger on long after the pleasure has subsided. Once words are out. the more value she's invested in you. 78 . I always recommend saying the bare minimum. In fact. The more time she spends trying to figure you out.The Best of TSBMAG. but it can also be dangerous for placing yourself into a corner later on. The social superstar lives on his own terms and knows exactly what he wants out of life. If you have a low tolerance for alcohol. They can't believe that he actually has it all figured out. be sure to watch your consumption. This simple concept intrigues people. you cannot take them back.COM Saying less in a conversation also helps you avoid saying something that will make you look foolish.

Instead of complaining that no one is there. If you're at a bar and its pretty empty. a nice quiet place to chill with some cool peeps.. and is always confident in his decision. most people will reply. The social superstar always knows where he wants to go. That is the mentality you need to have. Maybe this quiet hole. Once you decide where you're headed… do not second guess yourself. restaurant. Could you ask for anything better?" People like to have other people make up their mind for -the -wall bar does have some special quality.. This idea of "knowing where you're going" doesn't just apply to choosing a major in college. be completely confident with your decision and act as if that was the ONLY logical decision you could have made based on your belief system. After all. If you walked into a bar and Brad Pitt was chilling there you would automatically assume that you found the happening spot. It is difficult for the common person to comprehend that a human being as dedicated his whole life to a sport. Always seem one hundred percent confident in your choice of what you're doing with you leisure time. "I don't know. If you're convincing enough they'll begin to feel that you're right. or picking a career. If he is there. is must be cool. It applies to everyday situations. you're there right? And you're the most interesting person these people know. Each and every one of your actions should appear to be done completely by your own accord.Social Superstar If you want to capture people's attention. right? Even if the place is completely dead… he must know something special about if that the rest of us don't if he is hanging out there. If you claim that it is going to be a great time… make it a great time. 79 . If he is there… then IT IS the coolest place you could possibly be. they need you to point it out. They're just not cool enough to notice. or movie they want to go to. If you've chosen join the fire department. Don't be like the masses seeking approval before they do anything. appear to have an inner knowing guiding your actions. When asked what bar. This is one of the reasons we are fascinated by athletes. where you want to go?" This typical answer must not ever slip out the social superstar's mouth. or suggesting other places… try saying something like "This is exactly what I needed tonight. People are amazed by people who live with a sense of purpose. Think about it.

Even if you and him just sat in a bar drinking alone… when asked the next day he would be like "me and Bobby just had this really cool night bullshitting for hours in this hole in the wall bar… we got hammered and shared some hilarious stories. Certain people have a way of making you feel small through their brilliance. He just couldn't seem to do wrong. If you begin to inspire too much envy in people they will subconsciously want to ruin you. After awhile we even found our self "accidently" saying things that might get him in trouble. Sometimes you have to hide some of your skills in certain situations. While you want to be interesting. He would talk up the occasion and make you truly feel that he was genuinely pleased to be hanging with you no matter where you were or what you were doing. You don't want to make the people around you feel mediocre. passionate.COM I had a friend in college who was the master of this. Don' hate yourself for it. You were human. But you want to avoid being the guy who creates those feelings in people. or victory… it tends to create immense envy amongst your former peers. And he would always talk up his experiences to other people later on. When someone gets an unexpected promotion. No matter what situation you were in with him you couldn't help but enjoy yourself. They will try to create situations in which you falter. and other people absolutely adored him. we talk about the time and the place to "be excellent." It is also important as you make your climb to social superstar that you don't make a sudden improvement in fortune. and persistent… you don't want to inspire too much envy from people. Sometimes that is not enough though. You can avoid being this guy by not talking too much about your accomplishments." Do you see where I'm going? Never appear too perfect As humans. we absolutely hate feeling inferior to someone.The Best of TSBMAG. In a later chapter. success. Your rise to the top must seem gradual and expected. Although on the outside we praised him. Even if you are great at something… it is not always necessary to display your talents. We've all had that friend who was almost too perfect. motivated. Do not be that person. 80 . secretly we were jealous and almost wanted him to slip up.

EVER. If you’re on the football team and everyone else on the team is too hungover for Saturday’s game… be the guy still scoring the touchdowns… because you switched to water midway through the night. People can only suppress jealousy and envy for so long before it explodes. Joe will never let you down. 2. 5. Know Your Competition Someone is always aiming for your top spot. Don’t lecture… LEAD. You’ve got to pinpoint who that guy is as quickly as possible and be prepared for the moment he turns against you. Don’t Avoid the Risk Why was Braveheart so fucking cool? Because even though his legend would have been sealed had he never stepped foot on another battlefield… he went out there with his men each and every time. If you’re planning out Prom Weekend. Someone always will. Create a Winning Group Culture Why is Derek Jeter adored… and Arod hated? Because Jeter is seen as a leader who looks out for his team’s best interest… and Arod is seen as a self serving asshole. If you and your buddies find yourself at a college party… be the guy who immediately fits in. 3. Don’t ever talk about how many girls you can pull… just pull them. Lead by Example It’s easy for anyone to tell someone how cool they are… You need to show them. It is crucial that you’re 81 . When you’ve been assigned the role of leader… it’s easy to take advantage of the people below you… but that will ultimately lead to them losing respect for you. Vinnie Chase wants to do everything in his power to make his friends successful too? 4.Social Superstar Other tips for being cool 1. instead of telling Joe he’s in charge of renting out the hotel and buying the beer… Tell him you trust him to find the right guy to rent the hotel and buy the beer. Have you noticed how in the show Entourage. not Responsibility No one wants to be told what to do… but everyone loves to tell other people what to do. Pump up everyone in the group… get everyone to succeed. If you’re going to be the leader of a group… it should be a group that wins. Delegate Authority.

the individual who his comfortable. I found myself spending more time with these people. This is something that I've always been extremely good at. explicit chat rooms. I had been working in a restaurant for about a year. Which gave me an unbelievable amount of power. and an entire other lot of topics that had previously been unheard of to discuss. and simultaneously getting dumped by my girlfriend. The Taboo and getting people comfortable talking about sex The biggest social superstars. Most people. threesomes. random games of truth or dare. so I tended to naturally talk about it. I didn't socialize much with this group as I had a huge scene at college. Very few people give them this opportunity so it automatically puts you in an advantageous position. know how to use their sexuality as a key ingredient to their rise in stardom. knowing that you’ve already covered all your bases. by nature. I also found these people incredible tame for my taste. hidden affairs. and openness to admit explicit details of my life without blinking an eye. Well. try to suppress their sexual needs and desires. and we begin to crave this person's presence. I remember a few years back. Soon this tame crowd was openly discussing the use of vibrators. and romance novels. and a girlfriend that was already occupying most of my time. I brought my frank sex talk with me. They looked to me to tell them was alright to discuss and admit to. I became almost a guru to them. This leads to a population of people who hunger for their fix of sexuality through pornography. For this reason. and better yet. makes us feel comfortable with our sexuality is a refreshing change of pace. orgies (yes I will tell this story one day) and countless one night stands. I've never viewed sex as something dirty or to be ashamed of.The Best of TSBMAG. While people are usually taken back at first. 82 . At my command I would have girls hooking up with each other. When it happens… sit back and smile. For the first year working there. politicians like Bill Clinton and John F Kennedy. after graduating college. soon they are opening up to me with their explicit thoughts.COM ready for that explosion.

You need to come off as having a maturity towards sex beyond your years. you create an environment where everyone feels free to indulge in it. you will wind up looking like a sex crazed pervert. You don't want to come off as the horny college guy who can't stop talking about sex. Although I don't suggest taking the "free love" approach. This is similar to the movement that went on in the 1960's with the hippies. There were no games behind it anymore. Almost as if you're more evolved towards it then others.Social Superstar By creating an environment where everyone was able to let their guard down and feel confident expressing their desires. You have to be comfortable talking about it because it is such a natural part of your life that you would not be able to understand otherwise. sex became just another every day activity. By creating an environment where sex is not a taboo subject. If done wrongly. This is an art form. On many occasions I would sleep with more than one girl in a night… with both of them well aware of what was going on. 83 . And not something that you should assume you have the skills to do right off the bat. as that will only label you a dirty hippie.

and reciprocation. This is why it is necessary to use specific psychological techniques that will mentally bind them to sticking with you. They quickly get sucked back into their own day to day existence.COM Chapter 7: Cultivate a fan base (commitment + liking + reciprocation) Your Objective: The objective of the following chapter is to teach you how to develop a legion of people who worship you. The third weapon of influence you must use to build your fan base is the weapon of reciprocation. liking. Your communication skills need to be honed to near perfection. Once someone decides that they like you it will be much easier to use the other weapons of persuasion and influence on them. This is perhaps the most powerful of all the weapons. The three most important weapons of persuasion and influence for building a fan base are commitment. The second step in building a fan base is to get them to commit to the idea of following your lead. People's attention's spans often waiver. Your Plan: 84 .The Best of TSBMAG. The following section will teach you exactly how to get people to like you. But a crucial element to becoming a social superstar is to be liked and adored. In the following section I am going to show you how use the power of reciprocation to get legions of people looking for ways to help you achieve superstardom. This weapon simply states that human beings feel a mental obligation to repay favors done for them. The previous chapters have given you the tools necessary to be the type of guy who people want to be around. If you want to have people following you it is important that you first get them to like you.

Even if you currently have a social scene that you are active in I believe it is important that you know how to find new scenes when the time comes.Social Superstar This next section will get you further in life than any of the previous sections. How to Get Involved in Scenes Most of this book was written with the presumption that you already have a social scene that you can climb to the top of and command. But I also understand that there are some people reading this who will need some guidance into how to go about finding the groups of people that they want to hang out with. 85 . In this short section I want to list some more ways find people with common interests. as will your "social proof. date more women. These three weapons of influence (liking. Part Time Jobs Most romances don’t occur between two people who meet at a bar or club. And b y dividing your time between several scenes the "scarcity" effect will multiply. and commitment) are so powerful that if you can master them the world will be handed to you on a silver spoon. It is also important to be a member of several social scenes because it allows you to play them against each other for jealousy effect. earn more money." In the previous section on "hobbies" I gave you some tips for finding way to immerse yourself into new hobbies. If you follow the communication techniques laid out throughout the rest of this section you will make more friends. reciprocation. It makes sense. It’s a fact of life. The majority of romances occur in the workplace. You also tend to start picturing them naked. and live a more exciting and rewarding life than 98% of the population. When you’re spending 4 to 8 hours a day with the same group of people you tend to get close to them.

Chances are they will all be girls. I've put together a list of some of the best jobs to meet women at.If you are going to get a job in a tanning salon you want to make sure it is one of the bigger chains with lots of beds. This means you will have up. There won’t be as many co-workers to choose from. These girls may seem kind of nerdy… but they are wild in bed. These are jobs for those of you still in college. Barnes and Noble.close and personal time with any cute chick working there. And I mean everyone… from the 16 year old cashiers to the 55 year old Seafood Dept. All the customers will be girls as well. You want to work in a salon that has at least 5-10 other people working there. those of you still waiting to find your life calling.COM I learned this lesson my junior year of high school when I took a job at Shop Right. Young girls. Everyone was hooking up. If you’re in high school I would probably recommend a job in a supermarket for meeting women. But once you graduate high school the quality of girls your age working in a supermarket will greatly diminish. managers. The girls that will work there will more than likely be the hipster intelligent type. I wasn’t working there for more than two weeks before I realized that the employees looked at the place like it was a giant night club. There will be many female customers 86 . The 5 Best Part Time Jobs for Meeting Women Tanning Salon. and you will only have a minute or two to interact with customers each time they come in.The Best of TSBMAG. A tanning salon is best for someone with a fairly good level of game. And most of the customers will be repeat customers coming in weekly. Remember these jobs not only open you up to meeting co-workers and customers… but you also get introduced into the social scenes of all the friends you make at your new job.Barnes and Noble is best for the guy who genuinely likes to read and discuss books. or those of you just looking to supplement your income with a second job. This means you will have a chance to build rapport over time. The benefit is that most likely it will be a small staff of 2 or 3 people working.

The customer base will largely be young girls. A lot. get drunk. Barnes and Noble won’t offer as many hotties working there… but you will have a great opportunity to interact with those who do. Hotties with a lot of 19 year old friends. If you establish yourself as the fun party guy you’ll soon be adored by all the Just Graduated High School Hotts. If you’re working there for awhile you’ll become aware of the girls that work in Hollister a few stores down… the girls who work the counters in the food court… and the girls selling bra and panties in Victoria Secret. Not only will your store have hotties employed in it… but so will every other store in the mall. to enjoy the fruits of your labor. The best part of waiting tables is that it is almost customary to have a drink with your co-workers when your shift ends… and we all know… one drinks turns into three or four.This job is for those of you under twenty one. Get a job at chain restaurant like Fridays or Houlihans and you will instantly be engulfed in a social scene of 10-20 other likeminded college students looking to get paid. The mall is a Mecca of female talent. single moms. If you get a job in a store like The Gap you are bound to be working with adorable little 19 year old hotties. Retail Store in a Mall. You’re game doesn’t have to be good to work the restaurant scene. You’ll work with a mix of college hotties. The only drawback of a watering job is that there is very little chance of scoring with customers. Waiting Tables in a Restaurant. If you’re half way social and present your best self… you’ll get laid. The cafe will offer the best opportunity for flirting with customers. And it is perfect for you. If at all possible go for a position in the cafe. and the barely legal high school hostesses. Your game needs to be good… but not great. What makes waiting tables better than the other three jobs on this list? Alcohol. It’s an instant social scene. 87 .Can you say social scene in a box? That is what waiting tables is. And I ask… Is there a better age group to be adored by? I think not.Social Superstar roaming the store… but it will be hard to spend a good amount of time hitting on them without pissing off your manager. and get laid.

You will have your pick of the Join the Toastmasters Take dancing lessons Join a volunteer organization . and they drink! It’s not easy to land a good bartending job at a cool place. Don’t start with the intention of making new friends or finding a girlfriend… just make friendly conversation. 5. The trick to making friends at these kinds of things is to start right away.meetup. The first day you show up at any of these events start talking to people.This is the Pinnacle of part time jobs. 10.COM Bartending in a Hip Bar. easy. 88 Join a young professionals organization Take a yoga or meditation class Get a part time job waiting tables Join a bowling league Join a volley ball league Attend alumni events at your previous college Attend a weekly class at your gym Check out the various clubs at www. Of course everything on this list requires you to be social and open to meeting people. 9. 8. 7. Point blank… bartending is a power job. Working as a bartender in a hip place says “I know important people. 11. What makes bartending so great is that your co-workers and clientele are likely to be just the kind of girls you’re looking for… hot.The Best of TSBMAG. But that’s part of the power in achieving it. You will be banging your co-workers. 3.” Other Ways to Expand Your Social Scene I just wanted to give you a quick list of ways you can immediately expand you social scene. You get the best of all worlds. The longer you wait to break the ice… the harder it will get. 6. You will be raking in the cash. 21 Ways to Expand Your Social Scene 1. 2. 4. Don’t ask me why… but bartenders rank up there with cops for scoring the most ass.

How to be liked I want to start this section off with a basic list. I highly recommend that you read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. 89 . This list contains 13 characteristics of a likeable person. Use Myspace and Facebook to network (as opposed to hit on girls) 13. Being around people that share your interests will not only make new friends available to you… new potential girlfriends… but it will also help you grow as a person and get you closer to achieving your dreams.Social Superstar 12. Teach a class on a subject you love (art. Revive the old band and start looking for gigs at local bars 15. Scour the computer for local events. get a part time internship in a field you love (even if it's for free) 20. seminars 21. Whatever your passion is find a way to immerse yourself with people who share your interest 16. written by Sebastian Drake. photography. guitar) 14. that you should copy on a piece of paper and keep this list in your wallet along with your list of the six weapons of influence. Attend any networking event your job puts on (and network) 18. GET OUT OF YOUR HOUSE Those are just some of the many ways you can immediately begin to meet new people and expand your social scene. When you combine these 13 characteristics with the specific techniques I am going to lay out in the rest of the section you will have the blueprint for building a fan base. If you implement all 13 of these characteristics to your daily life you will find that people will instantly want to be around you more. computers. In addition to this list. Help with a political campaign (perfect timing) 19. Join a softball league 17. The key to this is to find activities that truly interest you and inspire you. classes.

This strikes a great balance between good eye contact and not staring. they'll actually like you more. and happy tend to smile. almost hypnotic. Not talking too much . Humans crave physical contact with others. Smiling shows that you're pleased to see someone which can be really flattering. It shows a calm confidence in what they are saying and it makes them even more engaging. some "pound". Touching shows emotion and affection and brings you closer to other people.the rest of the world slows down. smile a big smile.when you become more curious and encourage them to speak more. "But that's enough about me . 2. an easy way to adjust is to say. Look from your right eye to the right eye of the person you're talking to. If you want to change one thing to come across more social.COM 13 Characteristics of likeable People 1. and more emotion and affection can be expressed through touch than any number of words ever could.what about you?" 90 .Maintaining eye contact when you talk to someone draws them deep into conversation with you . and encourage others to talk about what they really enjoy. confident. and what interests them the most. Sometimes you will not feel in the mood to smile -however.The Best of TSBMAG. 5. Not talking about yourself . Touch . what they are doing.Closely related to the above point. and that smile puts people at ease.People who are at ease. and you both become quite important to each other. Instead they encourage others to talk and to open up.You'll consistently see magnetic people reach out and touch others. give them a high five. If you catch yourself rambling for a while. a playful punch on the arm or a big hug.likable people know this. if you choose to smile anyway you'll still get the great results. Smiling . Next time someone does or says something you really like. 3.Likable people typically are more curious to get to know other people and don't talk about themselves as much. Most people don't feel heard . Likable people and high status people do not talk too much. Likable people are always looking to find out more about the other person. 4. People love to talk about their experiences and cool things they've done . A quick tip: Right eye to right eye. Eye contact .

Tell them you believe in them and you think they'll sort it out. If you can reach out to understand another person. When you do mention something you really like. that means they do not want you to tell them how to solve it. 7. As crazy as it sounds.When someone tells you they have a problem. but doesn't explicitly ask for your help. nodding. 10. you'll instantly form a great connection with them. and empowered. Once you've established that you're constantly on the lookout for great things in others. 8. The most impressive people never actively try to impress people. People universally hate criticism. Never criticizing.Likable people never criticize others. and you're with them. and criticizing is almost always useless). instead try saying just "I understand. praising. Not trying to fix other peoples' problems . for any reason . and striving to truly understand them is powerful. They want to feel understood. Over 90% of the time. most people do not tell others about their problems in order to get 91 . no long talk.Social Superstar 6. people get used to feeling empowered around you.Whenever you see anything you like in another person. "Hey. Everyone wants to be understood." You'll be amazed at how uplifting it can make other people feel. you might get a funny reaction at first.Somewhat accomplished people want everyone to know about the accomplishments they've made. cared about. People want to know that they are not alone in the world. Really amazing people are much more humble and low key about what they've done. If they ask what you'd do. keep it casual. Showing praise and appreciation ." 9. ever. and appreciating constantly. If someone brings a minor problem to you. letting them know you understand. and will only give this feedback rarely (because likable people understand that praise is a much better way to help people change than even constructive feedback. The result is that a man trying to impress communicates that he's not impressive. and hate people that criticize them. Likable people always start off with genuine praise and appreciation before trying to give constructive feedback. Just. let them know.Making people feel understood. Empathy ." "I thought that was really cool how you did that. try listening. If people aren't used to you opening up. I really appreciate that you did that. Not trying to impress . maybe make a quick suggestion but don't drive the point really hard. No big deal. Next time someone tells you something heavy that you could have a long discussion on. people know the solutions to their own problems.

not complaining about the government. Making Friends In the section below I am going to outline some steps for acquiring female friends. When you realize that. 11. If you don't like something. 92 . they want understanding. You'll see quick improvements right away. and so on. and refrain from showing being fazed or flustered. instead. pick a couple more and start implementing. Especially never being down on culture-wide things outside of your direct control: So. and reassurance. The more you stay composed. It brings people down. People are very strong and quite good at solving their own problems when believed in.Everyone feels down from time to time. People start to respect you more. Never complain . The steps outlined can be used just as effective for making friends with other men who will make suitable wingman.The Best of TSBMAG.Never mentioning anything you don't like. the more you gain control over your life. and long term improvements down the line. Never impose weakness on others . Being positive is really good. The most charismatic people never "impose" that down feeling on others. 13. or just good buddies. I've also recommended reading How to Win Friends and Influence People.for a bonus. they're a fort of strength for people around them. you have two choices: Take action to fix it. activist groups you disagree with. The most important thing that you will find is that once you implement everything you've learned in the previous section you will find it very easy to make friends. pop culture. fashions you think are silly. or accept that it's there. Not talking about things you dislike is even more important.When people complain. Eliminate negativity . empathy. 12. You probably already do a lot of those . there's no reason to complain.COM solutions. others feel slightly less inclined to be around them. and they feel they can rely on you.

bartenders seem to always have power? It is because these guys are always surrounded by women. and getting put in the friend zone. Your intention was to date or sleep with them. Sure. Men know that hanging around these guys will lead to more girls in their lives. Later. But there is an important distinction between making friends with girls. DJs. Guys new to studying dating and pick up will probably find this advice contradictory to the never ending battle against getting placed in the friend zone. Think about it. For a long time I made the mistake of sleeping with cool girls. knowing full well that I had no interest in taking the relationship any further. most adored woman in that scene. Women often make the man. Whatever social scene you are currently involved in. I burned a lot of good bridges doing this. you friendship is never at an even playing field. But by this point I was a social superstar so it was acceptable. simply because I could. I instead made friends with these girls. we are trained to want every pretty girl we come across. The social superstar knows that the easiest way to climb to the top of the food chain is by having female cheerleaders cheering on your every move. 93 . Why do club owners. And you will more than likely forever pine for your opportunity to finally bust through the barrier of friendship. In order to do this you must eliminate all desire you have to sleep with her. as my skills progressed. should make an effort to befriend the hottest. When you get put in the friend zone your intention wasn't to be friends. Women know that hanging around these guys equals excitement and privilege. This is why it makes much more sense for you to put girls in the friend zone. As guys.Social Superstar The Art of Acquiring Female Friends The importance acquiring female friends has been stressed many times on TSB and throughout the dating advice industry by nearly every coach. Because they were likely aware of your true intention. The girl will always hold a subconscious power over you. But the fact is. we can't have them all. This is because the man who controls the women… is the man everyone wants to be around. I would occasionally sleep with them too.

in a conversation down the road. Once you figure out how she views herself. You aren't going to give them gifts. For instance. This way you can discover what her true interests and passions are. Appreciation mixed with adventure and excitement. No one can resist these things. She is merely a pawn in your chess game. and adventurous guy."Well. The social proof she provides you with gives you the ability to become a superstar.The Best of TSBMAG. but to make her feel important.COM You must accept right now that you will never sleep with her. but by paying attention you'll be able to ask her things later. The most important thing to do if you want to win someone over is to give them something. if during a conversation she makes a joke about having wanted to be a fireman when she was little. Instead of waiting for your chance to talk. Your goal is not to flatter can use it to win her over. Once you've completely eliminated your desire to sleep with this woman.say something like. making friends with her should be relatively easy." By doing this you're demonstrating that you see her as having an expertise in something other 94 . take mental notes of what she is telling you. For instance." She won't have expected you to remember that minute detail of a previous conversation… and when you do she'll really appreciate you. These things devalue you. The easiest way to make someone feel important is to really pay attention when they are talking to you. Confidential tricks for winning her over 1. If you've followed the guidelines throughout this manuscript than you've already established yourself as a funny. or favors. they always need fireman. Instead you will be giving her appreciation. interesting. You've already developed a strong degree of social proof. if you can tell that she believes she is very knowledgeable about movies… say something like "hey. This social proof gives you the ability to befriend her. play to that.if she's complaining about her current job. and special. Appreciation simply means recognizes the unique qualities in her. Once you've acquired this information. Don't be obnoxious or creepy about it. understood. Remember details of her life. compliments. did you see (insert movie) cause I always trust your opinion on what's good. 2.

taken on the attitude of the winner. 4. For more information on acquiring female friends listen to our podcast on the subject at: http://www. Don't stress your faults or blunders.and soon the mere sight of this person will make her wish you were around to share in the humor. Develop an inside joke with her. If the two of you are involved in a social scene together you can pick another person in that scene and share a bit of information with her about that person. 5. Everything you have learned in this manuscript will work in synergy. For instance. 3. Most girls want to believe deep down inside that they're more than their looks. make inside references to that little piece of knowledge. Be 100% completely yourself.greatseducer. The communication skills you are learning in this chapter do not work nearly as well if you are looked at as having lesser status. It is important that you've already completed the above listed steps so that you will be accepted by your peers as being a "higher status" male. began to make yourself more interesting. Don't hesitate to say anything you would around your male friends. Make it ridiculously unbelievable. Completely drop your guard around her. I got the entire staff. She'll always be questioning you about whether or not it's true.Social Superstar than looking pretty. Get her to experience something completely outside her comfort Communication The way in which you communicate with them men and women in your social group will go along way toward building your fan base. or beta head over to a strip bar with me.she'll become addicted to the thrill you provide.women included. but play it up very well. and give off a 10 second impression of a superstar. And make her have a good time doing it. This means that the communication skills you are learning in this section are dependent on you having already created your image. Most guys put on such a front around her.but tell her she can't tell anyone. If you can get her to do something outside of her comfort zone.but don't go out of your way to hide them. that the realness you display around her will be refreshing. after a work Christmas party one year. and associate the rewarding and exciting feeling with you. Now whenever this person is around. 95 .

A woman will say to another woman "I really like you earrings" and immediately the other woman will say "Thank you. You don't accept the praise as genuine. It is a simple concept. Even though it is an unconscious feeling. 96 ." People can't have the weight of reciprocation hanging over them.The Best of TSBMAG. When someone gives us something of value. You remember that compliment. When a man "lower" than you on the social ladder compliments you or does you a favor you feel no special bond toward him.and more importantly. the need to unburden one's self of it is so powerful that a person often acts immediately to restore the balance. And you secretly resent the fat girl for thinking that she has a chance with you simply by complimenting you. This is because a lower status male will be viewed as having an agenda. people are greatly moved by admiration that comes to them from someone they view as being "higher status" then them. But if a woman of exceptional beauty tells you that she likes your new haircut you begin to feel proud of the haircut. But when a man who you view as being "higher" up the social ladder than you does you a favor or compliments you there an unconscious bond that you feel toward him. a favor. Now that was an extreme example because of the examples of the two different classes of women. The law of reciprocation is the most powerful of all the weapons of influence.COM A lower status man who follows the principles laid out in a book like "How to Win Friends and Influence People" will come across as insincere or "try hard". People will assume that he is being nice because he wants something from you. People do not appreciate or respect praise or admiration that comes from someone they view as being "lower" than them. This is why you will so often hear two people complimenting each other within seconds.and her choosing to compliment you makes you feel special. or a gift… we do not feel a sense of completion until we reciprocate the gesture. A beautiful woman can pick and choose who she compliments. On the other hand. I love the shirt you're wearing. That bond is the feeling of the need to reciprocate. But this theory holds just as true when applied to men who you view as having different social value. whether it is a compliment. If a fat girl tells you that she likes your new haircut you immediately assume that she has an agenda behind feel a sense of "liking" toward that beautiful woman.

and authors. We recognize that as being fairly new TSB is below sites magazines like Maxim.we will get back what we've given exponentially. The same rule applies just as strongly to role reciprocation plays in the social hierarchy. prestige. We are also greatly aware of the hierarchy and where we fit in within in. Here is the kicker…. blogs.they will get back what they gave exponentially. When TSB is mentioned or receives a link from a site like Maxim or Playboy we recognize that a genuine favor was produced. or Men's Health.because we recognize that imbalance between our two spheres of influence. I want to briefly show an example of how this works in the business or marketing world. Before I explain the ways in which to apply this in the social world. This world includes all of the other men's online magazines. But the level in which we reciprocate back is tenfold when we feel the person who gave us something is of higher value to us. However. As editor of TSB Magazine I recognize the "world" in which we reside in. The hierarchy in our world is based on reputation.Social Superstar While it is only possible to gain the feeling of "liking" when a higher status person compliments you or does you a favor. We also feel a strong sense of the need to reciprocate. If we (the higher status) person give something to anyone that is lower status then us. compliment. Playboy. The sense of reciprocation is felt in any situation in which one person provides another with a favor. The Law of Reciprocation and Higher Status This is the fundamental concept that you need to build your fan base: When a higher status person gives something away to a lower status person. we are above thousands of other websites and blogs.but to return it in a much greater magnitude than we originally gave it in. We feel an immediate sense of liking toward that site for recognizing our unique talent. If a site like Maxim mentions us just once and provides one link to us. 97 . and influence. websites. number of visitors.we will go out of our way to mention them four or five times. The weight of reciprocation will be so strong on their back that they will feel the need to not only return the favor. or gift. providing four or five links to their site.

the easiest way for you to acquire fun and excitement is to provide it to others. you are able to multiply that currency. and adventurous. 98 . This means help those around you develop the confidence to explore their sense of humor. This is what will make them commit to seeing you achieve social superstardom. and to demonstrate the skills that they have. talk about the taboo. As you read through the next few sections keep this in mind as it will allow you to see the true power in what I am telling you. The easiest way to be fun to be around is to follow the principles laid out in chapter six.greatseducer. fearless. Although you should be introducing things like adventure. to indulge in the taboo. You don't want the people around you to feel like an idle spectator in your show. They will feel that they are a part of it. based on the law of reciprocation. Be Fun to Be Around The entire reason you should even want to become a social superstar is for the fun and excitement it will provide you. and have some skills that entertain people. taboo subjects… ultimately your goal is to bring these qualities and characteristics out from those around you.COM This is the reason that some people seem to rapidly ascend to the top of the social ladder. Encourage them to take risks. This is very similar to the saying "the rich get richer." Remember: Everything we give we will get back exponentially. The secret to being fun to be around The biggest thing you can do yourself be fun to be around is to make the people you're with feel like they are fun to be around. and therefore. Well. Once you have established a little bit of social currency. are along for the ride. This is what will cause them to put some investment into it.The Best of TSBMAG. We did a podcast called "Being the badboy with women" awhile back. http://www. Some of the key ideas include: be funny. This podcast includes many ways in which you can add excitement to the lives of those around want them to feel like they are a part of it.

4. This means organizing things like ski trips. 11. tailgating… The events I just listed are things that pretty much everyone enjoys doing. He is a leader who organizes the fun adventures that everyone craves. paint ball expeditions. 7. Winning the higher status people over requires the skill of becoming the go-to guy for a good time. Although most high status people are fun to be around. long road trips. nights out at unique places like S& M clubs. 14. The social superstar makes things happen.Social Superstar Be Someone Who Makes Things Happen Lower status people will always be won over much more easily than the higher status people in your social circle. You being the high status male must initiate these sorts of things and get people to follow along with you. 10. ugly sweater. Here is a list of things that you should try to organize: 1. 6. 16. 5. 15. 13. Themed parties (toga. Or a lower status person tries to set them up. 8. 80's) Softball games and BBQs S & M clubs Salsa clubs Concerts w/tailgating Bowling nights Road trips Ski trips Beach houses Happy hours (particularly a weekly event like Taco Tuesdays) Paintballing Sky diving excursions Hookah bars Volleyball night (some bars have courts) Strip clubs (bringing women with you) Fairs 99 . concerts. themed parties. These sorts of events are what will make you unique and separate you from the other higher status males in the group who are content to spend another night at the local pub. 2. 3. This means that they will most likely hang out at the same couple of bars or clubs every weekend. salsa dancing. 12. 9.often they are not creative. The problem is that no one takes the initiative to set them up.but no one follows along.

The Best of TSBMAG. You should not only be listening. The secret is to really listen when they talk to you. you said "I'm sure there are fires you could be putting out. Here is a trick for remembering details: 100 . The secret is to continually be curious about other's lives. If you are the guy introducing other people to this whole new world… they will repay you with loyalty and admiration. This does not mean simply ask them a lot of questions. everyone craves attention and recognition so much it hurts them. And the person who supplies them with "drug" of recognition holds a very strong power over them. Get Interested in Other People I am about to tell you the secret to acquiring and keeping massive amounts of friends. Monster truck derbies These are just some fun things that most people would enjoy. Most people wind up at the same bars or clubs every weekend. when she was complaining about her current job.COM 17. Show genuine interest in other people's lives. but actually remembered obscure details of a conversation. Because of this very few people actually pay attention to the people around them. Most people barely listen to the people that they are in conversation with. You need to use the information wisely and subtly down the road." On the surface she probably laughed… but inside she will be flattered that you remembered such a small detail of something she told you. The sad truth is.and be their biggest fan. and are just silently waiting for their chance to speak. In fact. You need to store specific details away for later use. Everyone is the most important person in their own life. Anybody can ask a lot of questions to fill up the dead air. And days or months later. asking a lot of questions of someone may even annoy them. but never take the initiative to set up. There is nothing more flattering to a person than the realization that someone not only listened to them. but you should be remembering the details of the conversation. Remember the example I gave earlier of the woman who casually told you that she wanted to be a fireman when she grew up….

But it is a pleasant surprise and a great conversation hook when you ask them about something they probably assumed you forgot. but many of my old friends and classmates show up for what is basically a yearly reunion." Her jaw dropped. Only stalkers know every little detail about someone. but she always had a boyfriend so I never talked much to her during college. Ask for her number. Later when you go home transfer that file to your computer in a folder with their name (or better yet a code name. you can use it to demonstrate a photographic memory. These people will be impressed that you were able to remember things that most people forget. When having conversations with important people you just press record. She'll wonder why you didn't write it down and assume you will forget it. She went on to confess that she had a huge crush on me throughout college. They are useful for so many activities. You can play the previous conversation and pick out important details. She is a girl that I always thought was pretty cute. After making brief small talk.) These folders should be reviewed before you go out to interact with these people again. says "hello" to me. We spent the rest of the night talking and I arranged a date to hang out. Remember Names I went back for homecoming weekend at my old college last October. The night before the homecoming game everyone from the Greek system usually meets at this bar called Alexis right down the street from campus. and then tell her you'll call her. you need to go out and get one immediately.Social Superstar Photographic Memory If you don't already own a digital voice recorder. Other than using one as a self improvement tool when it comes to perfecting tonality and conversation skills. You can also use this when getting a girl's phone number. you can just tell her you have a photographic memory. then repeat it loud enough for the recorder to pick it up. I had been out of school for seven years. While I am ordering a beer this girl from a sorority I used to part with frequently. Later when you call. she says "Do you even know my name?" I looked her straight in the eyes and said "Of course I know your name Kimberly. You carry the voice recorder along with you in your pocket. She was absolutely astonished I knew her name. 101 . Be careful not to seem too creepy by remembering too much.

This must be done in public. The lesson to be learned: Remember everyone's name the first time you hear it.COM I realized something that night. Let's say that there is a guy in your social scene that is slightly below you on the social ladder. But then I realized that I too get happy when a girl I view as having higher status knows my name.the secret to building your fan base is to become the fan of others. compliment them. entertaining. And if the people you are giving value to are lower on the social ladder than you. Just think. And more importantly – the more enjoyable your life becomes. One night you go out with this guy and he hooks up with an attractive woman. But the most important part. and fun people you have around you. You need to look at them as members of your team. They never get tired of hearing it. So the next step is to make these people feel like Superstars. The cooler.most of these people will have the same subconsciously believe that they are too important for you. And they feel flattered when people remember it. You always want your team to be as strong as possible. It is obvious to you that he is proud of 102 .they will feel the need to give back to you twice as much as you gave to them. Human beings love the sound of their own name.the higher your value becomes. Make Other People Feel Like Superstars As you can see by everything leading up to this matter how low down the social ladder the may beaddress them by their name. I actually get tingly upon hearing a beautiful woman say to openly praise them. When you view someone as having higher status than you. and give value to them. more interesting. Never worry that someone else will steal your spot light. You see yourself as such a blip in their reality that they probably don't even know your name. as badly as you want to become a social superstar. At first I was shocked that she would have thought I didn't know her name. And when you see anyone. Remember that everything you give to others will be reciprocated back to you. Use the photographic memory trick if you have to. Making other people feel like superstars is really a culmination of everything we've learned in this chapter. It is not a competition or a race.The Best of TSBMAG.

You know that he wants to brag about it. You've taken interest in them and have openly praised them. Not only should you acknowledge to him that you were impressed by what he did… you should brag about it for him to the other people in your social circle. and contribute to him building his self esteem. It took him like five minutes. But he can't.make him seem even cooler than he is. It should be said like this: "Joe is the man. Get in the habit of being the fan of those around you. and turning them into superstars. Think about it. The praise must be specific. He will love you for it. Up until now.he's macking both of them. By doing things like remembering people's name. He says something like "Joe is the man.exponentially.they will feel an uncontrollable sense of obligation to reciprocate the value. Well. So you do it for him. Last week the two of us were at this bar. You know that Joe is proud of what he did. and he's making out with this cute brunette. making them feel important. I say this because we all know that guy who is always seems incredibly fake while boosting up his friends. And you've done a nice thing for him. This is because he doesn't use concrete examples for his praise." This sounds phony. You are a high value person. If you know that Joe is shy around woman. This guy is the coolest guy I know." If you can get him out of his comfort zone. And later build him up. showing interest in them. help him to get over it. The flattery must be sincere. Before I knew. the entire focus of what I have been talking about is how you should be giving value to others. There were two girls we both wanted to talk to. Don't lecture him or try to impose "strategies" on him. Bring him into situation where he will be forced to talk to women." Do you see how much more sincere and real it sounds when you back up praise with specific examples. This is your chance to boost him up even further. You should also make it a habit to pull people out of their comfort zone. Let Other People Sell You This is the culmination of all of everything you've been doing. Talk about how "the girl was definitely into you. Not only is there a sense of 103 . Tell the story for him. now is the time in which that value is paid back to you.he will forever be in gratitude toward you. Help him by giving him practice.Social Superstar himself. praising them. He is the coolest guy I know.

this idea gave rise to the notion of a butterfly flapping it's wings in one area of the world. The more people talk about you the higher your value becomes. seemingly insignificant action will have a later effect on your ruled by the butterfly effect. If you praised them. You are now on "their side. Imagine that you spent a night partying with Brad Pitt. It will eventually get to the point where your reputation will precede you.but it is in their best interest to do so. Now imagine that Brad Pitt turned out to be a really cool guy who showed genuine interest in you. For instance. they will go out of their way to praise you and talk you up to everyone who will listen.The Best of TSBMAG. It turns out that one of his friends has the same interest in rock climbing that you do. Such systems over time become unpredictable. They will look for every excuse to talk about "the awesome time" you had together. When you show up for a party random people will already know who you are. Because these people already know who you are they will be more likely to talk to you. Can you see how quickly you can become a social superstar? Can you see how quickly invitations will start pouring your way from various social circles? Can you see how many opportunities will be thrown at you? The Butterfly Effect "The "Butterfly Effect" is the propensity of a system to be sensitive to initial conditions. remembering the large tip you gave him he recognizes you and introduces you to his friends. and repeat on this new group of people. The waiter is there. Your name will travel through many social circles. A month later you are at a bar. tonight you walk into a restaurant and have dinner. How many people do you think you would be telling that story to? Everyone you possibly could." Your entire life.especially your social life. wash. Rinse.they will want to be associated with you. This means that every tiny. causing a tornado or some such weather event to occur in another remote area of the world. If you're showing them a good time." This means that the stronger and more powerful you become.the higher that they will be able to rise along with you. View it like this. You leave your waiter a larger than normal tip. If you are higher value. These men and women will become an army of publicity agents for you. You 104 .COM obligation to return the favor. they will be constantly talking about how much fun they had with you.

She invites you to come to a party with some of her friends. and befriends you. All because you left a waiter an above average tip. She sees your meet and fall in love with another girl. The day before you're about to go rock climbing you leave a comment on his Facebook page telling him "Get ready for some heavy duty climbing tomorrow!" It turns out that a girl you dated several years ago is friends with him on Facebook.Social Superstar befriend the guy on Facebook and set a date to go rock climbing. 105 . While at the party.

The Best of TSBMAG. 2005-2008 106 .COM PART TWO: The Best of TSB Magazine VOL 1.

“One of the things me and my ex would fight about was the way she responded to the attention she got from men. I’m not a jealous person. But she was like a ham when she noticed guys gawking at her. I wasn’t jealous. Never say. passionate. what do you think would most make her want to date you? That you’re rich? That you’re packing nine inches? That you’re insanely confident? That you’re talented. Girls are strange creatures. or your cousins. Instead say. Through Pictures. co-workers. They are so unsure of their own opinion that they need to confirm it with the opinion of other women. Tell a story about you and a hot chick. I don’t care if these girls are friends. In some of the gambits Mystery uses this plays a huge part. 1. Through Storytelling. who was really hot…” That sounds like you’re trying to impress her. prostitutes. That example is a little over the top. but you get the point. The point is to have these pictures 107 . Take as many pictures of yourself with hot chicks as possible. If you want to fool a girl into believing any one thing about you it should be. ex girl friends.” You see you never said she was hot… But the girl will assume it. The story has to indirectly reference that she was hot. that you are wanted by other women. So I’m going to give you a quick list of things you can do to achieve the perception to a girl you are interested in that you “get laid” and are in demand. “Me and my ex. 2.Social Superstar 5 Keys to Playing the Role of Being Wanted Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 09/09/2007 If you could make a girl believe one thing about you. To me that's just obnoxious. and intelligent? That you’re the energizer bunny in bed? If you guessed any of these things you’d be wrong for ninety nine percent of the women out there. If they like him “I should like him too” is the thought that goes through their minds.

but she’s not my type. Through Text Messages. and if she fits it.” The girl will wonder what your type is. Don’t always be available to hang out. 5. And when you can’t hang out don’t give a reason. Texting is even better. and be not at all phased by having to wait to see her. “She’s got sexiness. Girls will always assume its other girl’s texting you. When you’re out with a girl. don’t say “she’s hot” it sort of puts you in that category of college guys who read Maxim magazine. These are just five things you can begin immediately to present the image to women that you are in demand. The key to this is don’t mention the texts and don’t respond to the texts. If she asks you if you think Jessica Alba is good looking. and then quietly put your phone back in your pocket without mentioning it. Through Unavailability. If she asks who keeps texting. The rich get richer my friends… 108 . Or how “hot” she is.COM lying around your house or even in your car. try to set it up to have many of your friends call your cell phone or text you. Never talk about how “hot” another girl is.” or “How about early next week” Either way she’ll assume that if you can hold off meeting her then you must be used to meeting attractive women. read the text. Girls by nature love to look at pictures. “I better keep this one before he runs off with one of these girls” 3. If you’re already scoring hot babes this will just be things you do naturally and in turn will make you score even more babes. just say “a friend” 4. You can then say “Saturday would work better. Instead say. When she flips through these pictures and sees you with all these girls a message will be delivered to her brain. Just read the texts and put the phone away. She won’t ask. If she says “You want to get together Friday?” Say “Fridays no good?” Don’t say why. Through Taking Hot Girls off a Pedestal. You can pull your phone out.The Best of TSBMAG.

not after you get a haircut. Do not give yourself time to second guess. IT IS TIME. You are probably saying. In grain it. Don’t waste another second with a dead end lead. or after you have time to plan out some advanced strategy. Go with it. Lead the conversation in the direction you want it to go in. No later. With that being said. and you’ll be home again masturbating. Because the more time you spend reading this shit. The biggest mistake you can make is letting a good one slip by because you hesitated or wanted more proof that your gut feeling was right. if you don’t feel it. Understand it. If you want pussy you better be ready to act on a minutes' notice. If you feel a vibe. Act on it quickly. not next week. and watch the used condom wrappers pile up. lessons. That is your way of justifying the fact that you haven’t got the balls to act on a good lead. The sad truth is there are a hundred guys lined up behind you to fuck this one girl. I’d say on average your gut feeling is right more that 80%of the time. That leaves 20% for error. chances are she does too. Because second guessing comes from thought. Delay for a second. the less fucking you’ll be doing. That is your fear of failure. I’d say that is a chance worth taking. A way to procrastinate. now what?’ If you don’t think it is the 109 . ‘okay I feel it. Trust your gut. If you start looking for proof you’ll start finding the opposite. Read it. Unless you are a completely delusional person. Take action quickly. Apply these rules. principles immediately in your life. or a new job. 3. thought is the cheapest commodity on earth. while the guy who took action has his dick between her legs. 1. Learn it. 2. flee. Those are all excuses to delay. The minute you feel your gut saying its time. And remember. You know when talking to a girl if you are getting a vibe or not. The first ten lessons apply in situations where you have yet to kiss the girl. Not tomorrow.Social Superstar 10 Lessons for Successfully Hooking Up with Girls Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/07/2007 Fuck an intro! Let’s get right down to it. Re-read it if you fuck up. Intuition is priceless.

If this is the case it is vital that you set the terms of your next encounter immediately. Kiss her already. damn it. Nothing. Shit. This is our way of warning her that it is coming. Make sure you keep the conversation light and flirtatious. it creates a certain amount of intimacy. I’m talking about making an initial contact. Remember: THE MORE TIME THE TWO OF YOU SPEND TALKING THE HARDER IT WILL BE TO KISS HER.The Best of TSBMAG. you are more than half way there. I know it happens. If you let her start rambling on she may wind up talking about something that kills the mood. YOU WILL TALK YOURSELF RIGHT PAST THE MOMENT. Don’t ask. Don’t try to flatter her with remarks about her eyes. Find a genuinely nice characteristic of hers and let her know you notice it. If your gut was right. in not so many words. A nice trick is to grab her hand when leading her through a crowded place.COM appropriate place or moment to kiss her. Silence is good if you are at the point where you want to move in for the kiss. yet. 6. Brushing hair away from her eyes. Her current boyfriend. You may have had the greatest conversation in the world. Planting seeds is for farmers my friend. Until your lips have touched hers you have shit. Let her know. Chances are you won’t have another opportunity as perfect as you just blew. Those are clichés and hardly ever get you anywhere. but DO NOT OVER DUE IT. Holding her hand is the key. Rubbing her back. or how pretty she is. 5. If at all possible keep holding it. she will be more than willing to follow. 4. There are times that you really can’t kiss her right then and there. Lead her to a better spot. If she has on a nice smelling perfume let her know that you’ve noticed. Before we can kiss a girl we must make use of our hands. Now make sure the conversation stays where you want it. Holding her hand. Her dead aunt. Let her know your intentions if you must leave without kissing her. Shit. but if you leave without kissing her you are no closer to her pussy then you were yesterday. I’m not talking about molester type shit. The hand is the first step. It will seem completely appropriate. once you get her through the crowd. lead her to that place. Compliment things that she can reply to. Throw compliments out there. Tell her. I stressed this point in lesson #3 but it is well worth repeating. 110 . That way it is not a complete shock when we lean in for the kiss. Yea. a little longer than necessary. Her last relationship. You tell a girl she is beautiful and there will be silence. but if you are not at that point then you risk a potentially awkward moment. If you can get her hand in yours. If you are in a crowded place tell her to come with you some where more intimate.

10. hold the hand. While you don’t want to lose her to the competition. If a girl shoots one of your attempts down and you continue on it shows vast amounts of confidence. Most of the time the girl is just weeding out the weak. CONFIDENCE IS THE MOST ATTRACTIVE QUALITY YOU CAN DISPLAY TO HER. Decide who the lucky lady is for the night and go for her. but I am sick and tired of stroking myself to sleep. and I’m sure most of you do to. There are a million girls in the world. (Hopefully fucking her) Do this by stressing those warning signals I told you about. Don’t be weak. Girls do not like the weak. Once you realize that nothing is going to happen tonight. Use your hand. 9. and a time up. you don’t give up until you have gotten in her pants or there is a painfully clear rejection. A winner figures out a way to win. That is why once you have decided on the girl. 111 . a loser gives up that much sooner. and overcome them. Tell her that you really want to see her again. The perfect moment does not exist. Now I’m not saying you can’t talk to other girls and use them as jealousy tools. Overcome small obstacles. If she has to leave. Those who look hungry never get fed. Don’t settle for less. This is kind of a rehash of the other nine lessons. let it go. Once you have decided. And I don’t know about you. but know who the bitch of the bunch is and go for her 100%. 7. Make up your mind quickly and stick to that decision firmly. When obstacles appear. Do not wait for the perfect moment to strike up a conversation. deal with them. The difference between a winner and a loser is. a place.Social Superstar that when you see her again you intend on kissing her. It will kill your chances for next time. Always leave with the upper hand. Hold her hand for a second or two longer than normal while saying goodbye. ask for the number. Don’t leave it up to a phone call. Be decisive. You will spread yourself to thin if you go for more than one girl at a time. There is no perfect moment. WAITING FOR THE PERFECT MOMENT = ANOTHER NIGHT JERKING OFF. Unfortunately you can’t fuck them all. you also don’t want to appear desperate. Even if you are. Make plans to see her right then and there. Set a date.she’s off the list. That way if you fail with her. I hate making that call. Follow lesson #6 while saying goodbye. or go for the kiss. push the other ones out of your mind for the time being. let her leave. DO NOT BEG FOR IT. Don’t act hungry. 8. But do not try to talk her into staying around.

NO MORE! I will say it again loudly. with half the sense of humor. get more pussy in a week then I did in a year. When I say rough I mean I went months in between fucks. UNTIL YOUR DICK PENETRATES HER PUSSY YOU HAVE JACK SHIT. half the knowledge I had. cheap and meaningless.COM These are the toughest lessons to master. 112 . Until you have that girl naked in your bed begging for your cock to dig inside of her. I was the king of content. And it hurt. you have not proven anything to anyone. I will laugh in your face. And dreams are like thoughts. Because without it you’re a dreamer. I learned these lessons the rough way. Try and tell me how you can have any girl you want on any given day. If I knew I could have her I was okay. Why? Because they require a certain amount of balls that we all have but tend to suppress. So fucking what? It is all shit. Months! I watched guys not half as good looking. As with anything in life. SHOW ME THE PUSSY.The Best of TSBMAG. Bad. I took comfort in the knowledge that I knew more than they did. It is easier to delay.

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Emulate a Celebrity for Instant Rapport
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/19/2007

This is simple advice. I’ve done it. And I’ve seen other people do it. And it works. It works like a charm. This is best for guys who haven’t yet developed their own personal style and unleashed their own personal inner charisma. People naturally feel most comfortable around people they know. They are also most attracted to people that they see often. This is the reason people often date someone they work with, go to school with, or share mutual friends with. You see these people all the time and they are part of your consciousness. When you see these people out you are drawn to them out of their familiarity. Because they are familiar you feel rapport with them and are attracted to them easier then someone you are seeing for the first time. Follow me so far? This all came much clearer recently in Brazil. I was in a city where I knew no one. The place is filled with beautiful women. It is relatively easy to initiate a conversation with any of the girls down there, as I am a young decent looking foreigner. What I noticed about myself is that I was drawn to the girls that reminded me of girls I knew back home. I was consistently going after the girls that resembled girls from my social circle, not just in appearance but in manner. It wasn’t a conscious decision. But in a land of unfamiliarity these girls were comfortable. They put me at ease. I felt a rapport with them which made me more attracted to them. This got me to thinking. When you’re out and you see someone who looks like someone that you know, don’t you pay a little more attention to them then the other less familiar looking faces? Most people do. It’s natural. We like familiarity. Women are the same way. I’ve found that when a woman I just met tells me that I remind her of someone she knows, she is usually more responsive to me, lets things accelerate quicker, and generally less flaky in future meetings. So the question I had was how I could create this rapport more often. And the answer was to remind women of someone they know more

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often. Since we don’t know anything about most women and the men in their lives, how can we remind them of someone they know? We have to remind them of someone that everyone knows. And who does everyone know? Celebrities! I know a few guys who naturally resemble celebrities (not necessarily traditionally good looking celebrities) and these guys have always had an easy time opening women. Most of the time the women don’t even realize that the guy looks like so and so, but they feel an instant rapport with them. This is because these guys are familiar to women. The women feel like they’ve known them for a long time. They put their guards down. So a quick way to gain instant rapport with women is to emulate a celebrity. Most of us have a celebrity that we resemble in some way. It doesn’t have to be a great looking guy. It can be Tony Soprano for all it matters. It just has to be someone that is part of national consciousness. Once you decide on someone that you physically resemble (it helps if it’s someone that other people have told you) then next step is emulate their mannerisms, their tone of voice, their gestures, facial expressions, and style of dress. I’m not talking about stalker type obsessive shit… I’m just talking about emulating someone. You can rent a few videos of the person you’ve chosen and really watch them. And practice. Practice their walk, their talk, and their mannerisms. You don’t want to make it obvious that you’re trying to look like someone. And the people that know you closely will notice the change and most likely rip on you for it... But when you go out you’ll notice a huge difference in the way you are reacted to. Girls will open up to you much easier. This doesn’t mean you don’t need the game to back it up. But it will open doors that might have otherwise been shut. Try it. See for yourself and let me know the results.


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Using an Opinion Opener to Initiate a Conversation
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/01/20089

Last night after the radio show Mike Stoute and I headed over to a local pub for a couple beers. The radio show was quite stressful as there was a shit load of technical difficulties with the transmitter… which messed the phone lines up, and hence, instead of talking to our planned guest we were forced to improvise. It left us feeling drained and just looking to unwind. The both of us already had girls we were going to be meeting later on, so our intentions were solely to chat a little and throw a few beers back. As some of you know, both Mike and I are recently single, and once again experiencing some of the things that make dating such a pain in the ass. Our conversation at the bar turned towards the girls we were going to be meeting later on in the night. Both of us had been dating these girls for a brief period of time and already beginning to experience the “what is this?” or “where is this going?” or “what should I tell my friends we are?” talk. The talk that takes the fun out of casual relationships. Mike and I were telling each other various stories of time’s we’ve been in the situation and how the different girls reacted. We were trying to come up with the “right” way to answer the dreaded “what is this?” question. Although the topic was somewhat serious, we began making a goof of it by coming up with over the top comebacks to the question. “Well, Sally now that you’ve asked… I thought we would spend a few weeks fucking, you know, to keep my dick occupied until something better comes along.” The goofing put us in a better mood and got us laughing a bit. Keen to the fact that there were two fairly attractive girls standing next to us sipping drinks, Mike casually turns to them and says “What's the best way to respond to a girl when she asks ‘what is this’ and you’re not really into her?” The girls were all too eager to jump in with their opinions. The four of us quickly became immersed in conversation. Soon the question became “what do you say when someone tells you ‘I love you’ during sex, and you don’t feel the same way? This got the conversations even livelier and more provocative. Soon the two girls were met by another female

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friend and instantly dragged her into the conversations, introducing us to her as if we were long time acquaintances. After getting a handful of text messages from the girls we were supposed to be meeting later on, we decided to call it an evening and head home. Although both of the girls we were talking to at the bar were attractive, neither of them struck enough interest in Mike or me to ask for numbers. So we said goodbye and left. On the way home I got to thinking how smoothly the whole conversation transpired. It reminded me of another time a few months back when I used an opinion opener that lead to a one night stand. What the two nights had in common, and what I believe made the openers work so smoothly, was the fact that they were legitimate questions that we wanted the answer to. In the Houlihan’s story, Eddy and I were already engrossed in a conversation that was entertaining us, so it was perfectly natural to invite a couple girls into it- to share their opinions. Our energy was real and the girl’s sensed it… which opened them up to take interest in our opinion opener. The same thing happened last night with Mike. Mike and I were legitimately curious to know what a girl wanted to hear from a guy when she asks “what is this?” so the girls we asked were more than willing to commit to the conversation. I think that the biggest mistake guys make when it comes to fully understand how to use an opinion opener is that they don’t realize that they need to have some emotional involvement in the answer. If you’re using canned openers, chances are you are using an opener that someone else had emotional involvement in, and that is why it worked for them, and not for you. When I use the phrase “emotional involvement” it doesn’t mean you need to feel deeply and passionately about the topic, but it does mean that you have to have some level of curiosity and interest. For instance, most people have heard of Neil Strauss’s “80’s pop duo” opener. Neil Strauss found humor in naming dogs after an 80’s pop duo, so when he asked that opener at the very least he was entertained by the idea. Some people are out there using this same opener and weren’t even born in the 80’s and could care less about 80’s pop duos. These people have no emotional involvement in the opener and it will rarely work for

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them. If the notion of naming a couple pugs “Hall and Oates” doesn’t make you laugh, how is it supposed to be entertaining to a girl you’re imposing it on? Joseph Mathews wrote one of my favorite books on opening called “The Art of Approaching” but I think the biggest mistake others who buy that book make is that they skip all the great theory and skill building and flip right to the long collection of openers. There is nothing magic in an opener that Mathews created, or Mystery created, or Style or Tyler Durden or Mehow. Those are just openers that happened to work for them. Just like I wrote about Mike’s “what's the best answer” opener, and I’m sure I’ll read in some field report in a few weeks how someone used that as their opener. I think instead of focusing on what Mike said to initiate the conversation last night you should focus on the way the night took place. Mike and I went out to have some good conversation. We were discussing a topic that interested and entertained us. When the point in the conversation called for another opinion we casually turned to the girl’s next to us and asked them a question. Our energy was good, our topic interesting, and everything flowed from there. Now you may not always be in the middle of a great conversation when you want to approach a girl. If that’s the case, instead of using an opener from someone else’s past great conversation, use one from your own. If a couple nights ago you and a few friends were in a heated debate over whether or not American Idol is rigged… then draw upon that conversation for an opener. If you were talking about “who turns out more successful the high school nerds or jocks” then use that as opener. At least you had some emotional involvement in them at one point. And I think if you’re genuinely curious about the answer than you won’t hear that little nagging voice in the back of your head calling you a fraud when you say “Do floss before brushing?”


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Being Comfortable Talking Dirty
Written by Michael Stoute Original Published: 02/25/2008

Talking dirty to girls is something that I have struggled with for a long time. It is only now that I feel “pretty” comfortable doing it, still with some hesitancy. I am sure that this comes to some men pretty easily, but it just didn’t to me. There I was, enjoying some great sex when I hear “Tell me how you like fu*king my pus*y” Now don’t get me wrong, I did like fu*king her pus*y, yet I didn’t feel compelled to actually say it to her? Then when I would say it, I felt like I didn’t use a strong enough tone of voice and sounded weird. With all this going on I actually start to lose wood…Great! I couldn’t really understand why I was having this problem. I was confident in all other areas of my game, yet when it came to this I was on new ground. What I realized is that most of the problem had to do with me dating a different breed of woman. A woman who may not be so confident in life, but has ultimate confidence in the bedroom. Girls with more sexual experience than me in some cases… MAN UP These women want someone to take control; hair pulling seems to be as common a missionary these days. Spanking makes me think of booty’s, not babies and giving girls mild titty twister’s (purple nurple) is coming back. The sexual culture is changing and you may be missing it. Women like this don’t just tell you to pull their hair and spank them, you have to know! So how do you know?


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You have to build rapport and maintain Kino escalation to test the waters. (Build comfort and get her comfortable with you touching her and vice versa) Then move this forward veeeeerrrrrrryyy slowly. Maybe start while you are talking and touch her arm, and leave it there for like 5-10 seconds. NEVER GROPE! Keep it real calm and relaxed. Later on lean in to talk to her and use touching her leg as an effect in something you are saying. Example: You're telling some story about something and you say. “Then he grabs me and …..” When you say grabs me, grab her leg for a sec, at most until you finish your sentence, then pull away and continue with your story. Later on (if you are still being your cool guy self and are not being creepy) you need to start looking for opportunities to make a comment about her anatomy, I would go for the ass, one because it is the least confrontational and two, because I love ass! With confidence say something like, “You have a really nice looking ass, would you mind if I gave it a little smack?” MAKE SURE YOU HAVE GREAT KINO AND RAPPORT BEFORE ATTEMPTING A BOLD APPROACH LIKE THIS; IT WORKS FOR ME...THAT’S ALL I CAN SAY. Most girls just laugh, some let me smack it on the spot and others make me work for it a little. Either way, it’s a great SOI (statement of intent) that will for sure keep you out of the friend zone. If it does work, you may have just found you next sex tigress!


Play with my head. or a few days. The point of a good date is the continuing escalation of sexual tension. Do it just enough that I never know what I’m in store for. I’m shallow and need the complete approval of my friends before I would seriously consider making you my girlfriend. Too many girls. I want to sit around and wonder why you’re not answering the phone. After I spend a week waiting for our Friday night date… I want you to call and say “something came up can we do it another night?” Of course I don’t want you do this all the time. Once you tell me I lose interest. Confuse me. 1. Like my friends and get them to like you. and then use the term “friend” to describe me. nor am I impressed with how smart you are with your political views. In the beginning you need to create sexual tension. because then it would become predictable. You have to do this through a mix of playful banter and gradually increasing the amount of time your hands spend touching parts of my body. I want to know that I will easily be able to commingle you and my buddies. We are all simply humans. Flirt damn it. Tell me you want your space. googly eyes. Tell me you want a relationship. 3. Spend three nights having wild passionate sex with me. teasing. I think that you'll find doing these same things will keep the girl interested as well.The Best of TSBMAG. I want to wonder if you’re going to return my call in a few hours. compliments. but then call me late night and tell me how much you miss me. And I want my buddies talking about 120 . don’t find it necessary to flirt. In the beginning I need to wonder what's going on. I want inside jokes. Nothing keeps me more interested than a girl I can’t figure out. 4.COM 10 Ways a Girl Can Keep a Guy Like Me Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/09/2008 This is a list of what it takes for a girl to keep me interested. Big mistake. and at least one of your hands in close proximity to my body. but then never be available to hang out. your daddy issues. I don’t want to talk about your job. 2. especially the hot ones. Be unpredictable.

Offer to pay occasionally.Social Superstar “how lucky Bobby is” behind my back. Do not try to make me feel small. but if you don’t chances are I’ll be bitching to my friends about you. my travel. But I want to believe that I’ve opened up this new sexual side of you that never existed for your other boyfriends. 8. and bust my balls from time to time. It was my magic dick that unleashed your hidden whore. don’t act like it's my obligation to always pick up the check. Make me feel like I’m the best you’ve ever had in bed. Be genuinely interested in my goals. and my hobbies. And don’t just say “do you need some money?” Make a sincere effort to pay. So will most other guys. You’re job in the beginning isn’t to show me how experienced and adventurous in bed you are… there is plenty of time to discover that later. 5. I’m not cheap and would never accept your money in the beginning. Laugh at my failed attempts at show boating. so now I’ve set higher long term goals involving my career. Do not belittle me. And make me believe that you’ll have no problem with me continuing to hang out with them in the future. your job is to make me feel like I just fucked your brains out harder than any guy you’ve had before. I’ve achieved that goal. No. Sure. Point out my short comings if I’m oblivious to them. Way too many girls do this and don’t realize it is a real turn off to guys. 6. Challenge me. Other than the playful banter I spoke about earlier. Call me out on my bullshit. Call me out on it. But don’t be afraid to let me know I can’t get one over on you. And I’m a horrible liar so you’ll probably see right through it. So you better make an attempt to become vaguely interested in them too. 7. I won’t let you. 121 . I’m going to feed you a lot of bullshit. Seem excited by the prospect of all of us doing something cool together like a camping trip or ski weekend. In college my goal was to fuck as many girls as possible. but damn it. I know I’m not your first. these are really the only things I truly enjoy talking about. Make an honest attempt at getting along with them. I’ll humor you and discuss your friend Sally’s relationship with her boyfriend or your brother’s drug problem… but what I really want to be talking about is my interests. I want you to crack a few jokes on me.

122 . I can be a downright mess at times. I’ll fix it…When you need someone to move a heavy piece of furniture.The Best of TSBMAG. 10. I’ll fall for it every time. my car is a wreck. I’ll hold onto that hope long past the point where there seems to be any realistic chance of it happening. Just pick up a broom and give me a hand. or maybe an “incident in college” early in our relationship… just enough to give me a glimmer of hope that one day I’ll find myself in bed with you and one of your friends.COM 9. Care about my well being more than I do. It's not your job to harass me about these things. Hint at an attraction to other girls. My house is sloppy. Hint at threesome. When you get a flat tire. and my sink is overflowing with dishes… I know this. I’m a busy guy. when you notice that it's been a long time since I’ve changed my sheets… throw them in a basket and head to the laundry mat. So. I’m there.

” I point at the mirror in front of us. That adrenaline rush usually puts me in a talkative mood. Still giving me nothing to work with. buying the supplements. Instead I take a deep breath and compose myself.” My mind is telling me it was a stupid inappropriate moronic way to start a conversation. I slack during the winter and then panic come spring when the scale starts tipping in the wrong direction. so with confidence sky high I turn to the girl on the elliptical trainer next to me and say “that is a really nice color on you. “Never underestimate the power of a gym outfit. “It's just my gym outfit. I’m naturally lazy.. She says. I’m reading the bodybuilding forums. The second after I say it I immediately have that twang of self doubt… like ‘what the fuck did I just say?’ That feeling of doubt is only amplified when she looks at me like I have three heads.Social Superstar Keeping Cool and Plowing On Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/11/2008 Every so often I hit that point where the time comes I need to get my ass back in shape.. But I am usually able to motivate myself in small bursts. and working out again.” I tell her. that allow me to keep decently fit.. Plow on. the more motivated we become and the harder we push ourselves.” She was wearing this pale blue shirt that really brought out her eyes. “See that mirror. You can’t lose on the opener. Tonight at the gym I’m all amped up after downing a super sized Red Bull. So I’ve began one of those small bursts of motivation. I want to crawl away. 123 .” “Oh yea?” she says.. “I read that it's a proven fact that the better we perceive ourselves to look while we’re working out.

wearing an old beat up t-shirt. I’ll see her again.COM I’m in the worst shape I’ve been in a couple years. “For instance. The interaction ends on a positive note. That's the way I look at gym game. Even naturals struggle with initiating conversations. and casually build attraction. But they’re confident enough to keep going knowing that girls forgets your “opener” a minute after you say it. Really really good! And I’m having a great workout!” I over exaggerate my motions on the machine. and gym pants with paint stains on them. And the next time I do will be one step closer to rapport. The point of this post is that many times you’ll initiate a conversation and get dead air. This finally gets the girl laughing and smiling. you’re going to see the same girls. If you go to the gym the same time every day. I don’t go for a number or even a name. take a deep breath and plow on. The best approach is to mingle with a bunch of them. It is everything afterward that counts. I look like I just rolled out of bed. I’m looking really good tonight. 124 .The Best of TSBMAG. It's easy to get nervous and go into deer in headlights mode… instead compose yourself.

Or I would try too hard to fit in with the younger college guys to try to conceal my age. These guys usually tend to be surrounded by hot college tail… so it got me thinking about gaming these younger girls. None of this worked. plowing through women (until I met the ex) but after college my skills trailed off in the same environment. The best way to keep them in the moment is to talk about them. When I was in college I was a machine. “How do you like living in the dorms?” and then I would go on and tell them a story about my dorm life experience. I was talking to them in a way that was taking them out of the moment. Not ask them questions that make them dig for answers that take them into their head… but instead to make declarative statements about them… For instance.. My game on girls out of college was solid… but back in the old stomping ground I came across very AFC. My topics of conversation usually involved questions like. I realized it was the way I was hitting on these girls that was fucking it up for me. In Mark Redman’s excellent e-book Conquer Your Campus he talks about how college girls crave the college experience. a line I’ve been using successfully when hanging around college girls is to turn to one of them and say “You’re trouble… There’s always one of you in the group…” and then smile.Social Superstar How to Talk to Younger Women Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/14/2008 Tonight I’m heading to hang out with a few college guys that I know. What I failed to realize is how self obsessed younger girls tend to be. 125 . I would head to a college bar or college party and get no response from the girls I was trying to talk to. I realized a little later that what I was doing wrong was trying to approach these girls in a rational way to spark interest. In the tight nit college environment girls tend to be attention whores.. You need to keep them in the moment if you want to score with them.

Use a little cold reading to keep interest. or how much money you make. 3. Then you can give her a nickname. Not me… why do you think that?” I’ll then usually go into some cold reading “You just have that energy about you. Assign her a nickname to establish rapport 4. My four step plan: 1.. Very playful and fun… The trick is to keep the interaction fun. Use the environment directly around you as a source of humor 126 . Make a declarative statement about her. 2.” If that dies down a bit I’ll keep the conversation ‘in the moment’ by pointing at other people standing around us and begin making random statements about them. Avoid talking about “what is your major?”Or “Back when I was in college…” and don’t try to impress them with the things that tend to impress older girls.. Chances are she’s fucking some guy that lives in a dirty frat house eating Ramen noodles every night.The Best of TSBMAG.” This gets the conversation centered in the moment… Me and her talking about how she appears to me right now. A little mischievous. I’ve even used something as simple as “Trouble. I’ll say something like “That guy over there is upset because he misses his dog” and then I’ll go off the cuff with some humorous reason I observe that. A college girl doesn’t care how good your job is.COM She’ll usually say “No.

I used to be very guilty of talking myself past a hookup. And that was when I began going caveman on women. especially girls. with a consenting woman. I can safely say that putting this idea into action took my game to the next level. I don’t know what provoked me to do that. At the end of the night I kissed her mid sentence. This means they look for others to lead the way and let them know what they are doing is alright. In the past I was one of those guys who always waited for the right moment. I put my finger to her lips to shut her up and then kissed her again. in turn you’re saying “it's okay to act a little irrational. She started to finish her sentence. It was like a disease for me. Then one day things got completely easier. A friend and his girl set me up with one of her friends.” We are all horny fucking creatures. We all have that side of us that wants to get buck naked and lick each other’s privates… most of us are just 127 . I would rope the girl in with witty banter and create the attraction. When you “go caveman” on a girl your bringing her into your level of animal like attraction. She was blown away. You’re letting her feel comfortable expressing her sexual side. The first time I did it was on a blind date. Strauss defines caveman as: To directly and aggressively escalate psychical contact. Girl after girl in college I lost because of diarrhea of the mouth. and progress toward sex. Like life changing easier. Why going caveman works People.Social Superstar Going Caveman on Women Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/02/2008 Neil Strauss brought the term “caveman” into popularity in his book The Game. predicated on the idea that early human beings did not use intelligence and words but instinct and strength to mate. And since then I’ve done it that way. When you eliminate words and rational behavior. That night I created it. but then lose her by talking myself past the moment. have “make up my mind for me” syndrome.

Going caveman means you stop talking and get physical. She would push me back. When we meet someone that allows us to act that way it is really liberating.COM trained not to act that way. Next thing I know we’re wrestling on my living room floor. When I kissed that girl mid sentence… she says “what was that” slightly snotty. her and her friends came back to my house for the after party. Unleash her hidden cavewomen. Another night I went out with a group of friends. This was our first night hanging out though. (This does not mean take advantage of her or intrude if she says stop) It means get her on your level. Instead of going into conversation about some stupid topic I started teasing her by gently pushing her away from me on the couch. She was testing me. If you’re looking to further escalate the encounter you need to ask yourself ‘what would a caveman do?’ Would he smell her hair? Would he bite her neck? Run his hands down her spine? Once you go caveman you can’t go back When you go into caveman mode it has to be for real. No words were said. What would a caveman do? When things are going well and you’re in a private place with a girl… things can go one of two ways. If I had apologized or went back to talking things would have been weird… instead I put my finger to her mouth… shut her up and then kissed her again… After that she spent the night. That is cave manning!!! 128 . and then I pin her down and kiss her. You can’t test it and then back peddle. There was a girl Nancy that was with us who I had been flirting with on and off for a month. At this point she is already attracted to you so you can either further emotionally or intellectually stimulate her… or you can sexually stimulate her. Later that night. She pins me down.The Best of TSBMAG.

he had a right to be scared because a few minutes later the Irish guitar player called a couple of the girls from her group up to the stage to sing along with the chorus of “American Pie. But luck had it that she chose him to do body shots with. If I noticed 129 . You could tell by the way he had his arm wrapped tightly around her in a “mine” sort of way that he was scared shitless of letting go in fear that his miracle score would disappear. but right now I wanted to talk about how you should compose yourself when a girl you’re hitting on in a bar walks away. and even if she had originally wanted to return back to him. Here is where AFC blew it hard… and what I’m warning you against. AFC stood there alone with a sour puss on his face repeatedly glancing at her across the bar waiting for her to return. do you think he’s making it tempting for her to return to him? Hell no. Well. whiny bitch…. At this Irish Pub I was at last night in Cabarete some standard AFC scooped up a drunken blonde. blonde California Hot never made it back to AFC. and stick her tongue down his throat. the way he carried himself after she left sealed his fate for the worse. Not only does it negatively affect you with the girl you’ve been working. finally settling on some other guy across the bar. he looked like a needy. but it negatively affects you to every other girl in the place.” Well. depressed. Now. dance against. I will have more about the trip when I come back in a couple days.Social Superstar ever Show Emotion When She Walks Away Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/01/2008 I’m currently down in the DR scouting out villas for our upcoming Mansformation Retreat. and noticed something last night at a bar that I wanted to address. He basically stopped talking to anyone around him and just sipped his drink looking miserable. She was drunk and kept getting side tracked chatting with everyone in the place. She was pretty drunk and was really anyone’s game.

COM how miserable he looked. You’re safest bet is to engage yourself in conversation with the friends you came with. don’t make it obvious to everyone in the bar how happy you are to be talking to her… I’ve seen guys giving each other hi fives like a bunch of middle schoolers after scoring a number. 130 . or fuck another dude in the bathroom… you best play it extremely cool. AFC last night blew his whole night after losing one Hot. By acting like a sad little puppy when she leaves you’re killing your chance she’ll be back. Go back to talking with your friends. or other people around you. Forget about her until she comes back… and if she doesn’t come back. whether it be to take a piss.The Best of TSBMAG. at least now you’ll be in a position to tackle other girls. On the same note. flirting with other girls standing next to you. You also want to keep her curiosity hooked on whether or not she has you. and just genuinely having a good time. say hi to a friend. how many other people noticed the same thing? When a girl you’ve been hitting on leaves. and she leaves. if you’re talking to a hottie. Because you can be sure that the girl will peak over at you and you want to give her a reason to come back.

Switch positions to one your less likely to climax with. 1. The most common way of trying to delay orgasm is to take your mind out of the moment and focus on something completely non sexual… like doing your laundry. I’ve never met a girl who bitched that you suddenly had the urge to eat her out. but it also has the disadvantage of taking you out of the moment… As much as you want to stare down at her watching yourself go inside and out. 5. Squeeze it firmly until the urge to orgasm passes. 3. It’s frustrating and embarrassing no doubt. 4. Don’t wait too long to make the squeeze or you’ll wind up splurging in your hand. I’d say pretty much everyone reading this (who’s had sex) has had the misfortune of blowing their load a tad bit too early. The slow breaths will calm you down and let the urge to climax pass. If you feel yourself about to orgasm early you and your partner can squeeze the smooth. Squeeze the glands at the top of the penis. Relax for a few minutes and when you feel its safe… go back to work. 2. it will help your cause if you close your eyes and daydream for a couple minutes. It's best to take slow long breaths if you feel yourself getting too turned on. For me. a project at work. And it definitely won’t increase your chances of sticking your wilie in the girl again…but there are ways to prevent it. I know that I have trouble finishing when I’m doing a girl doggy style. Use this time to let the blood rush away from the head of your dick.Social Superstar 5 Tips for Lasting Longer in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/24/2008 Raise your hand if you’ve ever been a three pump chump. Find out what position you tend to have trouble finishing with and switch to that position whenever you feel like you’re going to finish too early. If you feel yourself building up for an orgasm too quickly. 131 . Use breathing patterns to prolong ejaculation. This one can work wonders. or your grandmother. big head at the top of the penis to delay it. pull out for a couple minutes and switch to some foreplay.

Remember.The Best of TSBMAG. 132 . you only get one chance to make a first impression.COM I hope that these tips will help you from prematurely ejaculating.

All of those things definitely won’t hurt you… But they still won’t necessarily make you better in bed. Some girls only cum on top… other girls get off doggie. The woman that you’re sleeping with will give you all the clues you need… you just have to be ready to read them. others slow and soft… some girls like massive foreplay… Others like their clothes ripped right off. I’ve never had that problem before. Practice will get your sexual confidence up… but it won’t necessarily get you better in bed. I’ve found there is only one secret for becoming a better lover. and be willing to make the adjustments. she would tense up tremendously and push her pelvis out to make the pressure of my nose greater. The minute I realized what she was reacting to I went right along with it. the basics don’t change… but some girls like it hard and fast. or adding more foreplay will make you a better lover. I noticed that every time my nose would press against her clit while going down on her. Needless to say she went from being indifferent to oral… to begging me for it. Finally about a month in. The reason this is so important is because every woman enjoys being pleased differently. lasting longer. The key line to this statement is that you have to pay attention to what works on each and every particular woman you’re with. The first few times with this girl it was driving me crazy.Social Superstar How to Get Better in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 Some people will tell you that the secret to getting better in bed is practice. The secret is to simply pay better attention to what is working and what isn’t on a particular woman. Sometimes she’ll verbally tell you what she likes… but most of the time you’ll have to watch how her body reacts. 133 . Sure. I searched my repertoire for all the things that worked on the previous girls… and she wasn’t responding to any of them. Other people say that improving your stamina. The best lover is attentive and knows how to read the clues she’s giving you. Recently I was quite frustrated with a girl I was dating because I couldn’t get her off with oral sex.

you can try to change her style to match yours. This goes for all areas of foreplay and sex. push herself toward you. while groping my right tit. and spreading my legs over my head…” doesn’t mean they won’t be trying to telling you in every other conceivable way. What you have to realize is that just because they’re not going to open up their mouth and say “Bobby I really like when you stick a pinky in my ass. and mimic them. But if you want that first kiss to be memorable you’ll quickly note the actions of her lips and tongue. This is not because I have some special technique… it’s because I adjust to their particular style of kissing. When she particularly fancies something you can be sure she’ll let out an extra special moan in hopes you catch on.COM I’ve had many girls tell me that I’m the most amazing kisser they’ve ever experienced. Some girls are wildly turned on by the idea of being caught. most girls want to tell you what is working and what isn’t. You should also watch out for her body language. or fear of killing the mood. or pull you closer. Sure. 134 . The most common things to look out for are the intensity of the grunts and moans she is making.) The fact is. But they won’t tell you out of fear of hurting your feelings. blinds up. If you notice that a girl gets super wet and turned on when you whisper dirty commands in her ears… keep on doing it (but don’t overdo it and let it loose its affect. fear of embarrassment. or I begin the foreplay in any room but the bedroom.The Best of TSBMAG. You also want to be paying attention to the psychological factors influencing how turned on she is getting. The key is to be extremely observant and act upon the giving stimulus. When I sense a girl has this fetish… I’ll make sure I leave a door open. When she is enjoying something she’ll usually tense up. She’ll do everything possible to prevent you from suddenly stopping or changing positions. Everyone kisses differently.

That night was the beginning of my journey on a long and bumpy road to sexual competency. I sure have. Because of this I felt apprehensive about hooking up with girls as I imagined them all to be much more experienced than me. She was a virgin too. We were having marathon foreplay sessions where I would expand so big I felt I could burst… 135 . and at the same time. She fumbled around for a minute before I embarrassingly brought her hand back up to my chest and continued kissing her like nothing happened. I wound up in a relationship with a girl from my math class. I knew that physically there was nothing wrong with me… I mean. I didn’t lose my virginity until my freshman year at college. and unhooked her bra with the skill of a pro… but something was noticeably wrong. There was this exhilarating sense of accomplishment.Social Superstar Having Trouble Getting Hard? Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/04/2008 This is a post I’ve been meaning to write for awhile. I didn’t realize exactly how wrong until she reached her hand down my pants. I was jerking off twice a day… hard as a rock. this paralyzing fear of inadequacy. Have you ever found yourself with a girl. I still remember the first night I brought a girl back to my dorm room. I was surprisingly competent at making out. things are escalating towards intimacy… and absolutely nothing is going on down there? Or you manage to finally get an erection… only to quickly lose it as you attempt to slide the condom on? If you haven’t already experienced these situations… chances are you will at some point in your life. We took it slow in the bedroom and soon I was functioning full strength during make out sessions. But the minute I had a girl willing to come back to my place… I would lose all feeling down there. and I have to thank my blogger friend Evil Woobie for pushing me to finally write it. I was completely limp.

The girls I had the best sex with were the ones I felt no pressure to perform well… i. girls I didn’t want to sleep. But I was very rarely closing the deal with them.COM But then the night came when she decided she was ready to give me her virginity. I never got around to putting a condom on.) fat girls. This meant that if I could make it past the first few mishaps with a girl… it would be smooth sailing from there on out. By this time I was tearing it up with the girls on my campus. And the more anxiety I felt… the less chance I would get or maintain an erection. 3. and then a movie. I managed to fondle myself in the bathroom enough to get it up… but when she handed me a condom to place on my boss… I fizzled away. My next few attempts ended the same way. It wasn’t until one morning when she climbed on top of me… slid me inside her and starting bouncing up and down… that I finally was able to maintain an erection. 4. Alcohol in small doses helped the problem. When we finally got to my place I was a nervous wreck. It most often happened in experiences where there was a built up pressure involved.e. My girlfriend went on the pill… so all was well. girls I wasn’t supposed to sleep with. Of course. 5. We went out to dinner. Mainly because I feared going for the homerun… only to fail. After we broke up I entered the hell of erectile dysfunction all over again. Alcohol in large doses made me lose all sensitivity down there. What I learned about my experience with limp dick 1. The less comfortable I was with the girl… the less chance of success in the bedroom. 136 . The entire time my mind was racing with anxiety over how well I would perform at something I’ve waited 18 years to attempt.The Best of TSBMAG. I found it almost impossible to put on a condom without losing or at least greatly diminishing my erection. For the rest of our relationship I never wore a condom because I saw it as Kryptonite to my erection. The more time I had to prepare for the sexual encounter… the more anxiety I felt. 2.

I was amazed to find that pretty much all of them had experienced the problem before. The next biggest breakthrough came with using visualizations. Herbal supplements don’t work.” Other times I would blame it on being “stressed out over finals”. Some of them were even experiencing it as regularly as me.” What I did know was that my sexual confidence was completely down the toilet for awhile there. If there was still nothing going on down there… I would eat her pussy and call it a night. overcoming erectile dysfunction was where I saw the most distinct result. I took Yohimbe. I would pull her hand away and just pretend that I was teasing her to build anticipation. If a girl started to reach down there and I wasn’t hard. Man Power. Visualizations are a powerful tool that can be used for achieving any goal… but for me. How I Handled the Problem when it occurred If I didn’t avoid sex completely with a girl… I would prolong it as long as possible with massive amounts of foreplay.Social Superstar 6. Road to Recovery The biggest break through that I had was one day opening up to my friends about my problem. Once I was armed with the knowledge that other guys have gone through this too… I became a lot less nervous about the situation. Sometimes I would blame it on being “too drunk. to let anyone going through this know… it isn’t just you. Whenever I was on a date with a girl I would start letting the anxiety take over and imagining the pain and embarrassment I would feel if I couldn’t get it up. Ginseng. For the first time I felt there wasn’t just something fundamentally wrong with me. Other times I would blame it on “just getting out of a relationship. 137 . That is my biggest inspiration for writing the article. Horny Goat Weed. I realized that much of the cause of the problem was me visualizing the worst possible outcome. and just about every other over the counter supplement… and none of them made a damn difference.

The Best of TSBMAG. Conclusion It’s been many years since I’ve faced the embarrassment of an episode. I would imagine myself hard as a rock jamming her to the point of pain. It’s part of being a man. I fucked her all over her house. I don’t kid myself to believe it will never happen again. A few years after college I began dating this girl who refused to sleep with me raw dog. 138 . I made her come multiple times. I began viewing them as a tool to last longer in bed. Soon I found that I was actually going home and having the sex I was imagining. Since then my mind did a 180 degree turn in regards to condoms. Whenever I started to feel anxiety creep in… I would start imaging having the wildest hottest sex imaginable with the girl. I would tell myself “it happens” and then begin looking forward to my next opportunity to sleep with the girl. but my performance was less than stellar as my penis was only barely hard. If for some reason I still lost my hard on I stopped beating myself up over it. but if I felt myself shrinking… I would chuck it aside. The hardest obstacle to overcome was my aversion to condoms. I’ve worn them consistently since her and never once lost my erection putting one on. We honest to god. Instead change your focus to the mind blowing sex you intend to have. When we finally finished she said “that was by far the best sex of my life. We had the most mind blowing sex of my life. If you’re going through the problem right now the best advice I can give you is to stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. but could not cum. because it was the best sex of my life too. Oddly enough… with all the girls I slept with I never once had a girl force me to wear a condom. fucked for like four hours straight.COM I changed my internal visualizations. I was hard as a rock. An odd thing happened the next time we had sex. I would attempt to wear them on occasion. Repeat the image of yourself performing competently over and over in your mind. My first time using a condom with her I managed. The mind naturally attracts what we focus on the most. I would hold the vision of this unbelievable sex in mind and it was like a fortress blocking out the anxiety.” And I believed her.

Do any of you have any tips for guys who might be facing this problem? 139 . Look at it like a stumbling block. and get back on the horse.Social Superstar If the problem still arises don’t put too much emphasis on it.

How hungry you are for her attention (remember: those who look hungry. or what I call the “make up my mind for me” syndrome. Maybe you aren’t exactly the physical type she goes for. “let’s just be friends”. You thought you would get points for being “co-operative” a “helpful”.biz There’s a common saying in street fighting that 95% of all real fights wind up in a clinch and go to the ground. or there’s some unseen competitor who she’s waiting to hear from. Believe me. I don’t know. Whatever her reasons. This search for strength is the single most important reason why she tests you. time and again. I’d like to talk about how you can pass those tests. and instead you just got the fuzzy end of the lollipop. when you set rules and boundaries for her to follow. But I will say this: 95% of the time. the sad reality is that often a woman just isn’t that interested in you one way or another. The other factor is ambivalence. or sooner. and how to do some testing of your own. 2. a woman will test you by the second date. it lets her know she can relax around you and feel comfortable and secure. When you put a woman in her place.The Best of TSBMAG. but why don’t you call me late Friday afternoon and I’ll let you know for sure?” 140 . Why She Tests You: The Search for Strength and Certainty Look: one of the primary things that women are looking for from a man is security. Just how much control she can exert over you and/or the relationship. to see: 1. If you’ll take her bullshit. it’s because you haven’t learned to recognize when you’re being tested or just haven’t yet learned how to respond properly. the feeling that someone is stronger than they are. you can tell this is happening when you hear something like “Uh…well. this is important. In this issue. I’d like to go out with you Friday. If you’ve ever been dumped for being “too nice”. You see. or have been told.COM Wimps into Winners Written by Ross Jeffries Original Reprinted: 03/07/2007 Originally newsletter from: http://speedseduction. never get fed) 3. Could that really be true? Frankly. maybe she just got burned in a bad relationship.

“But you promised!” won’t cut it. the macho idiot who loses control and trashes the place when his girlfriend comes home ten minutes late is definitely not the example to follow. “How could you do this to me?” or. Taken from this perspective. instead of being. as part of an attack is just a convenient target to be destroyed. and intensify her desire to please you. an attack. and may even find yourself actually looking forward to her trying to pull shit. Notice I’m not saying you can’t or shouldn’t get a little pissed. a woman’s bullshit and tests are great opportunities to establish respect and dramatically increase her interest in you. there’s a concept from Jeet Kun Do. good buddy. every silly test of hers is just an unprecedented opportunity for you to establish respect. since you know it’s your chance to get her really hot for you!!!! Now. great Bruce Lee that basically says that any weapon thrust your way. increase her interest. there is the fact that sometimes. modern women just get overwhelmed with eighty billion things they are trying to do at once. you’ll be mentally prepared. “Oh no… why is she doing this? What did I do wrong?” from now on will be…. Just don’t go nuts with a stream of obscenities. before we go on to some specific scenarios. How to Handle It…Dealing from a Position of Strength To get back to street fighting analogies. when you are in bed with her. when overwhelmed. AH. they flake on commitments that occur during the peak of the overwhelm. In other words.Social Superstar Finally. the fighting style of the late. rather than something to be feared. HAH! A RESPECT OPPORTUNITY!!! Look: your attitude has to be that every rude piece of behavior. And. (Streams of obscenities are for afterwards. No. your response to these tests. but firm 141 . Whining stuff like. … IT’S GOT TO COME FROM THE RIGHT PLACE IN YOU!!! In other words. All he’s doing is showing he can’t control himself and he just earns the woman’s contempt. Coming from this perspective. let me add one other thing: when you do put her in her place. is just an unprecedented opportunity to… KICK THE OTHER GUY’S ASS!!!! Just so.) The other thing that doesn’t work is acting like a hurt little boy. You have to come from the calm.

something like. Will this work? Very often it does.” Here’s your response: “Let me ask you a question.COM “take it or leave it” position. and put up with her crap and ambivalence. And you’re also suggesting she’s stupid if she doesn’t grab this opportunity. “Well. and I’m going to leave it up to you. It’s not what she’s expecting. why don’t you call me later in the week and…. You have my number. if you don’t call it’s going to be a loss 142 . Just be as matter of fact and non-hostile as you can. Understatement works best with this one. Is going out with me something you can take or leave or is it something that you’re smart enough that you really want to do that?” Then shut the hell up and listen for her answer. On to some scenarios. And you know. What if she still hesitates? Well. I’d like to but. and they had better take advantage of the opportunity. point blank. and that always gets attention. I’ve come to the conclusion that a woman can only experience real passion for you if on some level she believes she could do something to lose you! Understand that when you show this willingness to walk away. Scenario one: You call to ask her out for the first time. that you are the person of value. in any area of your life. then where is that tension of knowing she could lose you? Answer: Nowhere! And that’s why you get nowhere when you put up with this kind of stuff! If you’ve seen an initially hot relationship grow ice-cold. it conveys the message that you are the prize to be pursued. Now.The Best of TSBMAG. This is all part of displaying the critically important… WILLINGNESS TO WALK AWAY FROM HER!!! You see. forever and ever devotion to her. say this one: You: Look. Her response is ambivalent. what are you doing here? You’re calling her on her ambivalence and letting her know you don’t have time to be put on hold. This is an attitude that will move you forward in any area that’s challenging you. By way of contrast. if you show a non-stop. Finally. after years of experience and study. you’re embedding a command that she really does want to go out with you. this is one big reason!!! Ok.

my friend. In fact. Ok? Bye. (I’ve heard every excuse in the book. I expect them to keep it. great…if not. I’ve seen the hardest. Seriously) Her: I can’t make it.Social Superstar for me. I can’t make this too clear. jaded bitches go to giggly little girls. You: (dead silence for as long as it takes for her to talk again. she’ll probably call back with five minutes and apologize and ask you out!!! I’m not kidding here. Scenario Two: She calls and cancels at the last minute without offering to do it again at some specific time. but man does it work well!!! In fact. that it’ll be a loss for you as well. HANG UP!! Now. NOT your fists. I guess with some people. this may sound extreme. I’m talking about using your mind. if someone makes a commitment to me. you don’t really get their attention until… You Give Them A Swift Kick In The Ass!! Please note I’m speaking of an attitude. Her: What????? You: Look…you made a commitment to spend time with me and now you’re blowing me off. from “My parakeet is sick” to “I’ve got to shampoo the rug”. I am against the use or threat of the use of violence or force against ANY human being. Got it? If you can live with that rule. but maybe what you won’t realize until after you hang up is. I’ve got a rare tropical disease that’s causing me to shrink by the hour. sayonara! Then. I am NOT talking about or in any way suggesting or condoning physical violence with a woman. unless there is an imminent threat of violence against yourself or a loved one. eager to please me when I’ve done this. If they can’t keep it. Just say NOTHING!!!) Her: Hello? Are you there? What’s wrong? You: What’s wrong is I can’t believe the bullshit I’m hearing. My rule is. You’re disrespecting me and disrespecting my time and I’m NOT going to put up with it. I need to know at least a day in advance so I can make other plans. It throws some kind of switch in their heads. 143 .

you want to do the unexpected. Piece and peace. self-control AND self-respect. Wait for her to finish. and as soon as she does say something like this: YOU: Can I ask you a question? HER: Sure. or are you just accidentally acting clueless? HER: (mouth dropping open in shock.The Best of TSBMAG. ok? I’ll always treat you respectfully. Walk a middle ground of strength. And that certainly beats a poke in the eye. doesn’t it? ‘Til next time. Ross 144 . The point is this: when women throw this stuff your way. Don’t put up with it. or lets you in and then proceeds to talk on the phone for at least that long while totally ignoring you.COM Scenario Three: You go to pick her up at her place and she either keeps you waiting outside for more than ten minutes. unable to say anything!) YOU: Don’t ever keep me waiting like this again. but I expect the same. like a “nice guy” and don’t lose your temper like a jerk. YOU: Are you being intentionally rude to test me. and these tests will become opportunities to power her straight into your bed. Do you understand me? HER: Uh…uh…yes.

as they teach in the Art of Seduction.” no just kidding about that last one.Social Superstar Ultimate MySpace Jealousy Tool Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 12/23/2007 Ok. Comments like “what a great time last night…” “Your party rocked…” “I was so surprised how well endowed you are.. But the point is. So I left a comment from a fake chic telling me how great of a time she had. Even for Bobby Rio this is sleazy. We got to talking and we were talking about my Halloween party last year that she missed. You’ll look like a real ass if you get caught. Just like you read the comments of a girl you’re interested in. and it's still paying off… What we did was create a couple fake female profiles on MySpace. they pay attention and remember shit like that. I'm going to put a patented “sleazy” on this post. Take advantage of this tip. But it wasn’t my fake profile girl. I know that Dave M teaches about creating recon profiles in his Insider Internet Dating course. My friend's tactic goes one step further. Anything that would add some value to our profile page. I’m glad I didn’t invent this. Anyway. So if you want to create a good jealousy trap. 145 . what a great host I was. But you get the point. This is a great way to create a triangle. Just don’t tell too many people what you’re doing. Then what we did was leave comments from them on our real profiles. I was pretty bummed she missed it. A recon profile is a fake female profile you create to attract men… the point of the profile is basically to see what your competition is writing to women online. and a little joke about a photo in my room. They do. that honor would go to one of my friends who’ll remain nameless. the girl I was bummed missed the party actually mentioned something like “I know you had fun that night!” She said this because she read the comment and assumed I went home with the girl… Actually I went home with a girl that night.. Don’t think girls don’t read your comments. I and my nameless friend took this tactic a little further about a year ago. I actually forgot about my fake comments until a girl I used to have a thing for came back into my life.

Anyway. You don’t go from T-ball to the big leagues without some time in the minors. When you get the perfect 10 in bed. You’ve read the story! It’s all just practice for the big game. I’m not saying you shouldn’t strive to fuck hotties. Aim lower. at home Friday night masturbating guys always seem to have really high standards? These guys who have absolutely no experience with women are waiting for the perfect 10 to come along.COM Aim Lower Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/15/2007 Just a quick thought… How come all of the virgin. no ass getting. you best give her the fuck of the century. And when I try to set them up with a “not so hot” chick they act like I’m crazy for suggesting it. C’mon guys.The Best of TSBMAG. 146 . Haven’t you notice the guys who fuck the hottest chicks also fuck the ugliest as well. That way when you do meet the perfect 10 you’re experienced enough sexually not to blow your load in three minutes. Is it a front you're putting up? Is it easier to say you’ve got really high standards than it is to admit you have no game and are afraid of girls? I say this because I have a few buddies who are perpetually alone. just today's thought. Plus its fun… but don’t tell anyone. Like they’re way too good for her. I’m just saying that in the meantime get your feet wet with some piggy's. Fuck that! Even Bobby Rio rolls with the fatties some time.

that is all an opener is. So in reality anything that you say to a girl is an opener. never political..) but the openers cause flirty type of arguments… not real heated win or lose type arguments. So are canned openers good? If it takes using a canned opener to get you to have the confidence to open your mouth in front of a girl then by all means use them. I used the outlines he gave and wrote openers that actually interested me. It seems that people love googling openers looking for the page of perfect ones to use in bars/clubs/banks/hot dog stands/Wall Marts…. the routines… but I never used them in the field. Essentially. So what makes a good opener? The reason that openers Mystery uses or Style or any of the other canned ones that have become popular over the years. A conversation starter. I think that is why Neil Strauss's book became so famous. These were original openers that better matched my unique personality. are so good is because they are non threatening. And I want to hear some comments and feedback to see what all of you think about the topic. never racial. always light… meaning the topics are never depressing. but I feel that it's time to write on the subject again. Openers Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/29/2007 It seems that the topic of openers is all the rage lately. I looked for the reasons that they work. (Or hasn’t it always been?) What are good openers? Will Mystery openers still work? Are canned openers good? Mike Stoute and I did a podcast about openers a few months ago. Because it gave a lot of people a handbook of what to say to a girl to start a conversation. I read about how to deliver them.Social Superstar PUA Openers. Openers. I took everything I learned in the amazing book and constructed my own “canned” openers.. never anything that can be angrily argued about. Remember the topics at times are supposed to cause arguments (who lies more… floss before or after… is kissing cheating…. topical (mainly topics girls might be interested in) and they are sometimes comedic. I memorized the punch lines. the hooks. 147 . What I did when I was first starting out years ago was I bought the book The Art of Approaching and basically took the 50 or so openers he gives you in there and studied them.

COM For instance the question “Do you floss before or after brushing” became my opener “That piece of meat in a wonton soup… what the hell is it?” The opener “Is kissing cheating?’ became “Would you let your fiancé go to Thailand for his bachelor party?’ “You have a real confident way about you” became “You have a friendly air about you. genders." The jealous girl friend opener became “Would you be mad if your boyfriend slept with Jennifer Anniston?” This is how I got by in the beginning. I just changed names. To tell me I will regret it. I created a whole shit load of openers that brought up topics I liked and started using them. disarming obstacles…) they became easy to make up. they were imagining themselves pulling the cord. I told the story… I had them imagining themselves in the plane. Tell me I only live once… blah blah… I ran with it. the impatient tandem jump instructor yelling at me… these things made the story come alive… these things got me LAID that night. Sometimes I cheated and used a Mystery routine.The Best of TSBMAG. sometimes I felt like a liar…(”it's not lying its flirting” lol) Sometimes I would return to a bar a couple weeks later and have to remember some story I made up and roll with it again. These thing got one of my friends 148 . Once you know the purpose of a routine (demonstrating higher value. Yes. But usually these stories weren’t lies… they were stories that happened to me. As I used them more and more I began to see a pattern of how girls reacted to them. to fit the mood of the moment. my friends and I had three different sets of girls swarmed around us waiting for me to answer the burning question “will I pussy out or will I go sky diving tomorrow?” My friend opened the set my telling them to talk me out of being a pussy. From there I started developing routines to lead into. (back then they weren’t so cliché) but more and more I began making up the routines on the spot. you must not be from New Jersey. the wind. dates. I remember once. I used my imagination and turned a true story about my backing out of a skydiving trip… into this life or death moment of manhood bullshit that the girls ate up. By reading books like Magic Bullets I was able to see how to construct a routine. It's all about how you sell it.

you can’t ask for a better feeling!!!!! 149 . Man. Once you know how to construct a good opener. and it's working…. It's to tell you that openers aren't some magic mysterious lines that are hidden away for a select few. It's easy.Social Superstar LAID that night… the other one (with the least game) got a number and wound up fucking her three dates later. He still thanks me. When you go out and the night really becomes an adventure. Things are even truer when you get to the point that you’re not using canned ones. It's fun. and you’re going with the flow. My point isn’t to brag. They are merely conversation starters. It actually makes you look forward to going out.

You don’t need to promise her flowers and diamonds. Women can smell neediness a mile away. or Adult Friendfinder. As much as your ego must hate the idea of slumming. You probably work with one of them. 150 . What's great about a fuck buddy is that because you’re getting laid a couple nights a week you won’t be so needy and hungry when you're out hunting. Your goal is get comfortable being sexual. They are all over. So what's the best way to do this? If you're less than experienced in the bedroom I recommend going out and getting yourself a fuck buddy. do it. but if you’re a guy that's been sitting on the sidelines for years you’re going to need a little experience in the bedroom before you start fucking around with 9 and 10s. That's great. Use each other.” And it works. I’m talking about a plain Jane.The Best of TSBMAG. someone with a little baggage… your goal here is not to fall in love. They are at bars. she won’t ask for those things. talking sexual to girls.” Back in the day me and my friends would call it “practicing for the big game. This means getting comfortable touching girls. Your intention should be to give her as much sexual pleasure as possible. And don’t feel bad about it. They can look at you and know if you “get laid. Remember “you only get one chance to make a first impression.COM How to Calm Your Sexual eediness Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 09/19/2007 Too many guys jump into this seduction/PUA stuff swinging for the fences. escalating.” Every time we fucked a girl that was ugly or fat we would blow it off to “practice.” And women want guys who get laid. The more comfortable and confident you get in your sexual abilities the more natural it will be for you to act sexual around women. If you're fucking a girl right. Nothing more. If you're wondering where to find these fuck buddies. maybe a chunker with a cute face. They are on Match.

this incident left Dan confused and filled with self-doubt about his women-reading skills. I am used to young men coming to me for confidence boosting and for improving their internal and external relationship with the opposite sex. He claimed that “all the signals were there. though. They don’t understand how to tell. she may be really into the 151 . put into my own little rhyme sequence. gym memberships.Social Superstar Are You the Man or Just the Fan? Written by Justin B. Especially to hotter girls that are used to getting the attention. Many women measure themselves based on how many men hit on them or give them second glances. had an additional problem that he and many others often need help with: discerning a girl’s interest or lack of interest. if she is looking at him as “the man or a fan. He was to find out. He was sure she was into him and even admitted to me that he started envisioning how jealous his friends would be when he landed this hot babe. This young man. etc. Like many of us. Original Published: 04/24/2008 Recently. this attention becomes like a drug. they had good conversations and she seemed receptive to and appreciative of his frequent compliments. We all have heard some variation of this in our lives and we know it is not an easy thing to hear.” Ouch. though.just in case you have not noticed. plastic surgery. I explained to him that this was a frequent mistake I see in men: They don’t know how to tell the difference between when a girl wants them or their attention. when he asked her out for coffee. especially a very hot one.” Let's get these fact straight fellas: Women love attention. to beautify themselves. He had recently had a bad blow to his intuitive confidence in this area when he had thought that a beautiful and single girl that went to his health club was interested him. clothes. With this fact in mind. They spend exorbitant amounts of money on makeup. it is very important to keep in mind that when you think that a girl is into you.” She had been smiling at him and eagerly said hello to him every time he came into the gym. that she was not into him. She expressed to him that she saw him as a “cool guy and a friend. I was doing a telephone Life Coaching session for a 19-year old young man named Dan.

not only my own experience with women. I remember a few years back I was not sure if this very attractive girl that I worked with was into me. She is going to seem a little nervous and cognizant of her behavior. but you must learn to tell the difference if you don’t want to waste your time and set yourself up for needless rejection.The Best of TSBMAG. Pay careful attention as you read and do not read this hastily. Psychology is not an exact science and a lot of the advice about human behavior is true to the extent that it shows trends. This does not mean that she does not think that you are attractive or that there is no chance of changing her interest. by contrast. If a woman seems not to care about the impression that she is making on you then most likely you are “just a fan. but also from having women as Life Coaching clients and friends. Women. 1) Most of the time if a woman is truly attracted to you she is going to be self-conscious around you. So. If you are interested in the exact psychology behind this: in short the stomach area is a part of a woman’s body that she is usually very conscientious about. by now you are probably wondering how you tell if you are “the man or just a fan. cool. There was a group of us who ate lunch together in the building cafeteria that talked politics 152 . When we men go on a date we like to take pride in how calm. There is an important principle to keep in mind when seeking to understand women: Women actually like being nervous sometimes. Below are 2 general principles and tips for judging a girls interest or lack of it.” Before I go into giving some very good and specific tips let me first issue a disclaimer about anything cookie cutter when it comes to human behavior.” I don’t just mean a physical impression either.COM attention that you are showering her with. This principle will be interwoven in some of the pointers that I address. Watch also for her brushing her hair back nervously. Watch particularly if you think you look good one day for her tugging at the bottom of her shirt by her stomach area: This is usually a sign that she thinks you are attractive and wants to measure up. and collected we were and try to find ways not to feel and appear nervous.” It sounds crazy but it is true. often like to feel the “butterflies” in their stomach and like to feel that they are “being kept on their toes. There are many more but these 2 seem reoccurring.

she asked more questions. she will want to know more about you and will find a way to ask you. A few months ago I was on a teleseminar conference call about addictions with one of America’s best health experts. To close.” 2) Is she asking you questions about yourself? Bottom line guys: If a girl is not asking you questions about yourself most likely she is not into you. They had exchanged pleasantries but the conversations were always short because she was working out with friends. He cut her off and said “If you are asking about it. If she wants to know if you have a girlfriend you don’t have to tell her. A participant asked him about her habit of drinking a large Starbucks coffee every day. One day we were alone in the cafeteria and a news story came on television about the war in Iraq. David Simon. nor really look like she really cares what you think and is a little nervous. We usually stop by there after the gym and there was a hot chick working there behind the courtesy desk that goes to our gym. Then she asked him something that sealed the deal and left no room for doubt. She noticed on his keychain that he had a key tag for PETCO. She asked him if he had a dog and as he answered her questions. I walked over with him and she saw his yogurts and asked him if they were good. Using the same principle. not a group of you. She confessed in a cute way that she had asked her friend who knew a lot about the war to fill her in because she wanted to appear smart in front of me. On this particular day she had a lot to say and I looked at her quite impressed.” She laughed and knew that it was true. but did smile at me and listened when I spoke. She will find ways to be closer to you and look for excuses to ask you questions. “I am not sure if it is an addiction…” she stated.she had never tried them she said. Scott said that she had been smiling at him a little in the gym but he was not sure if it was friendly or personalized to him.she probably will find a cute way of asking.Social Superstar regularly and with a lot of zeal and passion. He bought a 6-pack of soy yogurts and I told him to go ask her if she could ring him up. If a girl is interested in you. My friend Scott and I were in A&P a few weeks ago. I walked away. he got her number and was out with her that weekend. You guys get the point by now: If a girl is not trying to overtly impress you. if you are wondering and find yourself 153 . Not surprisingly. She ate with us but never said much during these conversations. then it probably is an addiction. I want to tell a quick story. Right then I knew that I was not just “a fan” and I got her number. most likely you are unfortunately “just a fan.

and you are unfortunately a “fan” and not “the man. like the caller. the answer is probably what you do not want to hear: that she is not into you.COM asking if a girl is into you.” Thank you Justin – 154 .The Best of TSBMAG. then.

People are fascinated with leaders. order Chinese. I’ve been hanging with this girl for a couple weeks now and we decided to stay in last night. and watch the first season of Lost on DVD. The show begins with a plane crash.. Shit is upside down.. The truth is we watched eight straight episodes of Lost and passed out on the couch halfway through the ninth. and has all of the survivors looking up to him within an hour of the plane crash. We are so fascinated with them because very few of us have the intestinal fortitude to be one. Everyone is in panic.. The point of this post isn’t to talk about Lost. I could write a whole post about the show. takes charge. And just like Jack these guys get life’s bounty. but being the show is in its fourth season and I’m at the beginning… my post would be old news for most of you. confusion mode. down a bottle of Pinot. No one has a clue what to do. Women. success… but more importantly a sense of purpose. wakes up from his black out and immediately takes on the roll of the leader. Jack selflessly tries to help everyone on the island. I’d love to tell a story about how 30 minutes into the first episode we were having animal sex on my kitchen table or how her friend showed up and we had a mind blowing three way… but that just wasn’t the case. and I’m sure you guys would wind up spoiling a lot of shit for me. but to talk about leadership.. 155 . money. Sure it's a television show. She had never seen it either and was into the idea of starting the series from the beginning. Until the main character. I have resisted watching Lost for years but at the insistence of my brother and a couple friends I decided to give the show a shot. Jack.Social Superstar The Hero the Bounty and the Purpose Driven Life Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 02/24/2008 It was a very tame Saturday night for me. But there are people out there just like Jack.

The Best of TSBMAG. And I’ve had more than I ever dreamed I would. And for the longest time that was my dream. I can’t speak for anyone but myself but there are times in my life that I feel an overwhelming sense of being unfulfilled. And when you’re living completely self centered. I had been following a blog. growing a beard. He obtained the respect of everyone on the island because while they were standing around waiting to be saved… he was saving other people. Some way to convince myself that I was free. He didn’t get the girl because he sold her on his ideas through long winded speeches and debates. I’ve got more friends than I can count. Rooshv. I realize that part of the reason I wanted to take the trip was for some form of escape. He’s back now and I recently posed a question to him in a comment. and generally lived on the edge and survived to tell about it. Many books talk about living on purpose. and waking up in strange places with strange people. I followed his journey religiously. I don’t have any regrets. Dyer has written many books about living on purpose. Yet. still won’t be enough. But even with all the books that I’ve read on the where he detailed his six month trip across the continent of South America. To prove to myself that I wasn’t wasting my life away in the rat race. But I’m not so sure escape is that easy. something along the lines of “did you find what you were looking for?” Because I’m starting to believe that even the soul searching trip I felt destined to make…. wishing badly it was me trekking on a bus through the Peruvian Andes. my motives for the trip are still entirely selfish. having three week flings with Chilean beauties. I think it is impossible to be free. I recently wrote a list of 5 Must Have Self Help Books and that list included two books by Wayne Dyer. In a world so obsessed with “self help” I think we often neglect the fact that the best form of “self help” is the selfless act of helping others. waiting for my slice of the cheese. I’m not sure freedom is as simple as throwing on a backpack. slept with more women than I care to admit. I was going to finally live. He did it through purpose and action. I was going to take it. watching Lost last night I still felt as if I were missing something important. it took watching seven 156 .COM Jack didn’t become a leader because he was the best politician on the island. Because when it comes down to it. visited more countries than most people could name.

none of them have swept me away in inspiration. judging. I would be waiting for something to happen that would make me think “now I’m really living” but more than likely I would spend six months waiting. Jack that she knew she would never see in me. worldwide democracy. So understanding that I will more than likely never be trapped on deserted island and have to play the role of savior to a group of stranded castaways. I felt it was ‘beyond me’ to live selflessly. and then wake up and decide it was time to go home. analyzing.Social Superstar straight hours of Lost to make me finally understand what living on purpose is all about. each speaker recollecting a 157 . or Braveheart is that I always sort of believed you needed to be inspired by notions like ending world hunger. or national independence. to date. Living on purpose means getting lost in the moment because there is something greater than your personal desire that needs to be achieved. A little lost. comparing and contrasting. peace in the Middle East. or the previous movies such as Gandhi. or realizing that the girl sitting next to me was seeing something in Dr. And because of that. global warming. But I think many of us have been mislead to believe that to “be great” you must do great things. Most of us will never have the opportunity to deliver a speech like William Wallace gives in Braveheart or liberate a nation through self sacrifice like Gandhi did. That is why my South American trip would not have been the escape I was looking for. The father of my friend’s girlfriend passed away and as I listened to the various eulogies. Maybe it was the deliriousness of staring at a television screen until the wee hours of the night. While these are all noble causes. Jack that was inside of me waiting to be released. but does that mean we have no choice but to view ourselves as less significant. pursuing. I figured maybe I was doomed to a world of ego domination. less “great?” I was at wake this afternoon. curing cancer. or maybe it was me seeing something in Dr. but I woke up this morning feeling a little different. and rationalizing the trip’s every minute. how can I experience a sense of purpose in my life? Take on the role of leader? What kind of higher goal will transcend me to the next level of living? I think that my problem with the Dyer books I’ve read about purpose driven life. I would still be stuck in my mind.

The Best of TSBMAG.” It's funny how when you’re running on a few hours sleep. He took days off from work.” It's about deciding to be great this very minute.COM particular time in their life when the deceased impacted their life for the positive. A few of the speakers had given heartfelt thank you to my friend who had stepped in to pull the family together as it became more and more certain that his girlfriend’s dad was going to lose his battle with cancer. Everyone in that room viewed my friend as a hero. We can be great friends. are those who ultimately see the most of life’s bounty. he had long intense conversations with the dying man. Standing there in the funeral parlor I realized we all have the choice on a daily basis to be great. It's been said over and over again that those who live on purpose and relinquish their personal wants and desires. We don’t need our plane to crash in the South Pacific (if that's really where they are) to give us our moments to shine. leaders. One of the speakers quoted a line from "It’s a Wonderful Life" saying “no man is a failure who has friends. your heads a little messed up from too many episodes of Lost. great role models. Everyday each one of us is presented with situations where we can be a leader and a hero. and acted as a sense of strength for his girlfriend and her mother when the two of them would continually break down. It's not about waiting for that moment where you can “look like a hero. great listeners. and you get swept away in the emotion of a wake. and heroes. how clearly something so elusive can suddenly appear. 158 . It's about deciding that every action you take from here on out will serve a greater purpose.

I was envious of the motivation he possessed that got him out of bed at 4:30 am every morning to work his body to peak performance. Most of us are not above striving for them. The set of values they define for themselves gets pushed aside for the opportunity to be with a beautiful woman. I religiously followed his career and collected his memorabilia. We have all most likely been a role where we’ve acted in a way that is not congruent with our core set of values… but watching Roger Clemens at the Congressional hearings yesterday reminded me of the importance of living with integrity. But integrity goes further than your dealings with the opposite sex. the other part of it was that I was completely impressed with the stories of his unparalleled will and determination.Social Superstar Integrity Makes a Man Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 02/14/2008 There is more to life than how much money you can make or how many girls you can sleep with. is living within a set of core values and beliefs that you set for yourself. Roger Clemens was my favorite sports figure since 1986. I’m the only guy in NJ who walked around in an Astros hat. It is equally important in how you live your life. Their lack of integrity stems from the fact that they hold beautiful women to different standards then they hold the rest of the world. Even after I began to lose interest in baseball I still made an attempt to keep track of his career. I am by no means a perfect person. I included. We addressed integrity in our “The Lost Art of Being a Man” podcast. and how it relates to the way you interact with women. The reason women have no respect for “nice guys” is because these nice guys often lack integrity. But the real depth of your character and what ultimately makes you a man. 159 . These are the artificial indicators of achievement in our society. Part of my fascination with him was based on childhood nostalgia. It was to the point where my friends laughed because I changed favorite teams every time he signed a new contract.

There is a certain shame in these types of lies. Human beings make mistakes. I will not deny it. It's not something I’m proud of. Shit happens. And if someone casually asked Roger Clemens if he’s ever used steroids I would not condemn him for lying in that situation. But life is too short for regrets so I move on. Something at that point in time (mainly my dick) made me feel it was necessary to sleep with a woman outside of my relationship. I told them EXACTLY how I felt and why I did it. But when I eventually got caught I laid all of my cards on the table. Period. People fuck up.The Best of TSBMAG.COM That being said Roger Clemens choice to have himself injected with steroids is something I could forgive him for. I’ve lied to girls and cheated on them. It is his personal business. I don’t think any of us are above lying. My definition of living with integrity means owning up to your mistakes. we are human beings. But watching Clemens blatantly lying over and over again to save his chances for the Hall and his endorsement deals. Or doing everything in your power to correct them in the future. I may lie as to not appear a slut in that particular situation. It would have been easier to continue the lies (as OJ showed us deny deny deny) but to me there is a difference between situational lying and lying about something you’ve been accused of. It is my personal business and I may not feel the need to be completely open. and I know full well that I did. you’ve lied. But if a girl claims to have slept with me. If you’ve ever used someone else’s canned routine in the field… you’ve lied. If someone casually asks me how many girls I’ve slept with. Something at that point of his life (mainly his fierce drive to be the best) made him feel it was necessary to use performance enhancing drugs. It wasn’t always easy. But most of us have defined our core set of values to let these sorts of lies slip by. Because when you deny something you’ve done against 160 . Owning up to a mistake is what separates the men from the boys. If you’ve ever told a girl you were going for a friend's luncheon but really had sex with an Argentine prostitute in back alley brothel…. While making a mistake is human nature. I relate it similarly to mistakes I’ve made where I’ve cheated on girls that I loved. The same can be said for Roger Clemens use of steroids. has left me with the feeling that the man lacks a sense of integrity. Once again.

161 . blame everyone else… or you own up your mistakes and BECOME A MAN. be a man and move forward. take the self serving route. This is where Roger Clemens has crossed the line of simply making a “human mistake” and gone on to show an utter lack of integrity. questioning his best friend’s story. The problem with Clemens choice of action is that the only person he is looking out for is himself. In essence. in fact. using his wife as a scapegoat. He is calling numerous people liars.Social Superstar someone else’s word… you’re. and wasting the time of a whole lot of people who would just like to move on from this shit. In the face of adversity that Clemens is facing you always have two choices: You can lie and manipulate and play the self serving “if I deny long enough they’ll forget about it” card or you can own up to your mistake. In every situation in life you have these same two choices: You make excuses. calling them a liar.

the main character Jay Gatsby has one of the strongest cases of “oneitis” I’ve ever seen. The two fall in love and date for awhile before circumstance prevents the two from continuing their love affair. Daisy goes on to marry someone else.COM The Great Gatsby Complex Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/23/2008 I’ve always said you can learn more from certain novels about human nature than you can from some of the most celebrated self help books. He is full throttle into “the sickness” over an ex lover Daisy Buchanan.The whore. In the novel. We clicked on many different levels… and we both were insanely attracted to each other… but Jackie was “on the promiscuous side. We all have those girls from our past that still haunt us.The Best of TSBMAG.” She fucked just about every guy I knew. F. That was part 162 . It is the guy who is struggling through law school so that he can show up at his high school reunion and impress a girl he had a crush on ten years ago… it is the guy that is at the gym seven days a week building the perfect body in hope that he runs into an old flame and she’s blown away by his chiseled abs. but instead they are usually girls that we have unfinished business with… girls that “slipped away” or circumstance prevented things from going further. The Great Gatsby Complex is an inward hope of meeting someone from your past that drives you to make decisions in your present life. They are usually not ex girlfriends. And discussed the details with me. and Gatsby spends the next five years building an empire to impress her with his new wealth. Scott Fitzgerald’s famous novel The Great Gatsby serves to constantly remind me about the art of letting go. Jackie was a girl I worked with a few years back. He also throws party after party in his mansion in hopes of her showing up without the realization that it was her old lover throwing the party. For me there are three that pop into my head: Jackie. The reason that I decided to write about this is because the other night I realized that I still suffer from what I call The Great Gatsby Complex.

finally I give in. Jaime.. and when the trip ends -so does our brief romance…and our friendship.The soul mate. I had hooked up with her sister in the past and felt a little weird at the party because her sister was there with her boyfriend (who she was with when we had our fun) so to keep myself occupied I flirted with her younger sister Jaime. So after that night we went back to being friends. I’ve written about her before.. and there was no way I could be caught dating her..The 17 year old.. What is so dangerous about The Great Gatsby Complex is that it can begin to control your present moment. We avoided the temptation of hooking up with each other for over a year… until one night we couldn’t take it anymore and dragged each other into a bathroom during a party and made out like our life depended on it. The chemistry was so unbelievably hot. until we gradually disappeared from each other’s lives. She’s the friend that after five years of unbearable sexual tension we explode during a ski trip and spent a week in a hotel barely ever leaving the bed.. I don’t consider myself as having oneitis over any one of them… but I do find myself hoping that they’ll show up at the bar I’m at more often that I’d like to.. I mention these girls because they still haunt me.Social Superstar of our friendship… helping each other get laid. I met Jaime at her older sister’s birthday party. Kryptonite. I do have fantasies of running into one of them and instantly rekindling the old unfinished feelings. but there was one big problem. Jaime was the most adorable girl I had ever seen and soon we were laying on the bed making out… she’s telling me how we’re going to get married… how much she likes me… and I’m enjoying it like I haven’t with any girl in a long time… I resist having sex with her for most of the night despite her constant begging. Soon I found myself standing on his porch telling her how cute she was… then we kissed. I’ve found myself suggesting certain bars to my friends because of the slight chance one of these three 163 .. We were both in relationships at the time with other people. Later that night Jaime came back to a friend's place and we kept talking. Later I’m so confused over what I did that I never talk to her again. I tried to avoid her after (she wasn’t exactly street legal) but a week later she called me up and asked me to go down the shore with her and her friend. Jackie was a known slut.. We got down the shore and rented a hotel… her friend quickly disappeared and left us alone in the room.

I know some of my actions back then weren’t stemming from my best self. Each of these experiences made you the person you are today. How to Rid Your Self of the Great Gatsby Complex I think the first step in ridding yourself of the complex is the acceptance of all things past for what they were. I’ve found myself constantly looking around hoping to spot one of them… Holding onto the past like this ruins the opportunities that are presented to you in the present. I don’t deny that they hold a special place in my mind… but holding on the past in this way can prevent you from meeting new girls who may have similar qualities. The second step of ridding yourself of the complex is the expression of gratitude. And I am thankful for that opportunity. Each of these three girls had a quality about them that separated them from the hundreds of other girls I was with during that time frame. You have to have faith that she is out there… 164 . and connection. Part of the reason we hold onto these ghosts from our past is because we don’t believe that we’ll meet anyone better. They were brief romances that ended prematurely. You have to know that you have all the qualities and characteristics to meet and attract an even more special girl. It is time to forgive yourself and move on. I think that the reason it's the girls that we have unfinished business with that haunt us the most is because we only have the memories of the intense attraction. These feeling never got a chance to mature so they are still burning strong… unlike ex girlfriends who we went full circle with and our feeling had a chance to run their course leaving us with both good and bad memories. chemistry.COM might show up there. Any of the three girls I mentioned could easily have been the love of my life… but they weren’t. AND THAT'S ALL THEY WERE. You have to forgive yourself for anything you did to contribute to ruining the romance. I know I made mistakes that might have cost me a chance at a great love affair… but what is done is done. The third step of ridding yourself of the complex is the act of forgiveness.The Best of TSBMAG. Each of the three girls I mentioned added excitement and adventure to my life during the time I knew them. The final step of ridding yourself of the complex is the expression of faith.

Social Superstar Once you develop a sense of faith that you’ve yet to meet your ideal girl… the chains from your past are released and you begin to grow excited for what you may find in your future. 165 . If you are being held back by ghosts from your pasts I suggest following the four step plan to rid yourself of the complex.

which will easily translate into attracting women. After several months.COM Build it and They will Come Written by Justin B.” If you have seen this excellent movie you know it teaches many life lessons and has some great underlying messages and themes to it. Kinsella gets a very clear vision of a baseball field in his cornfield and believes deep inside of himself that there is a connection between the “build it” part of what he heard and the vision of the baseball field. this will attract women. Original Published: -4/03/2008 Build it and They Will Come by Justin B In the very popular and successful 1989 movie Field of Dreams. “have your shit together”. let us translate this phrase into “Build it and they will come. it is rather that they are so fulfilled and 166 . as they say. For our purposes. protagonist Ray Kinsella played by Costner is told early in the movie by a mysterious voice “Build it and he will come” as he walks through the cornfield on his large farm. ironically. I often tell them that one of their main problems I see is that they are too focused on getting women and not focused enough on building their own life and their own self-confidence and self-esteem. starring Kevin Costner and Ray Liotta. His wife is skeptical but tells him to follow his vision and build the field. some of the deceased ballplayers from the shamed 1919 Chicago White Sox baseball team show up on his field and now he more deeply understands the message that he chose to have faith in: to “build it” and trust that they “will come. and you build your life up to a point where you feel good about it and.The Best of TSBMAG. women will pick up on the very confident and responsible vibe you give off. After this. I think you all intuitively understand that what I am saying is that you have to have a strong basis for your self-esteem outside of your success with women and that.” As a motivational Life Coach I often deal with men that tell me that they have a difficult time attracting and dealing with quality women. though for our purposes is this key phrase “Build it and he will come” and how it can be applied to your own life with women. When you are being fulfilled in multiple areas of your life. What I would like to focus on today. Many men often note that men that seem to land a quantity of quality women into their beds give off a vibe that they “don’t really care.” It is not that they don’t really care.

his family. Being this way will put your much more in touch with your own masculine energy and will make you very appealing. or career that you are passionate about. 2) Lift weights.” So how can you apply this philosophy to your life and “build” your own life up to make room for them to “come”? Here are some starting points although by now I am sure you get the idea. Learning to meditate. purpose. Become charismatic and excited about it.” Remember that a personality trait that women often get frustrated with about themselves is the fact that their self-esteem is too much based on what the opposite sex thinks.for women. this is your career but if not find something that interests you.Social Superstar focused on the other parts of their lives that they don’t have a lot of time to worry about how they are doing with women. You may even consider it something for women. A woman I was talking with recently told me that it is very sexy for a guy to be very into his job. sports. Women pick up on their vibe of independence and self-fulfillment and this is very attractiveboth emotionally and sexually. The men who have mastered this principle have inadvertently taught themselves and us a valuable lesson about the connection between their own lives and their success with women: “Build it and they will come. Men find themselves best when they are happy with their work. Hopefully. 1) Find a cause. While you release endorphins and build your emotional and physical muscles. his friends. 3) Practice meditation or some form of relaxation You may have never considered meditation or consider it something for New Age weirdoes. the last thing that they want is to be with a man that has the same issue. When you lift weights you are going to be getting in touch with and expressing your masculinity even outside of the gym. because she said that it expresses a sense of confidence and fulfillment that he is strong and that he could “be strong for her. you will attract attention with your very masculine vibe. though. I am not just saying this for the reason you might be thinking: that women like muscles. besides women of course. and become passionate about it. etc. will build your self-confidence because you will slowly get in touch with the negative thoughts that are holding back 167 . If you can identify your core passions and pursue them you will find yourself much more fulfilled in a holistic and overall way.

COM your success with women and other areas of your life. “they” will come. I usually recommend to clients anything by Steven Halpern or Deepak Chopra. Do not get into the trap of doing these things solely to attract women.” Find a local meditation class or buy a book or CD on meditation. As you become more content and build your self confidence at a deep level. 168 .The Best of TSBMAG. See the value in them because you will feel better and therefore will not need women to make you feel good about yourself. Then watch how as you “build” your life. they will come in droves because you too “will not care.

this phrase will hold as much importance as anything you’ve been taught before. By our ninth month together I desperately wanted to be single again. I barely paid attention when she spoke to me. I think my plan was to treat her so badly she would end it with me. But the whole ordeal took a giant toll on the both of us.forever ruining her for other men. I denied most of her attempts at sexual activity. I became a completely different person. non-sexual. Like most young couples. mean. And finally she did. Soon the resentment grew to anger. I hated the person that I became. I was a naive boy at the time. After this I avoided relationships altogether for awhile. naive to the reality of relationships. I wasn’t much better. So for the next six months I stayed in a relationship I was miserable in. The more I hinted that I was looking to end the relationship the more she clung closer to me. my girlfriend Jillian and I rushed in full throttle. She was a mess. I heard from friends that she actually had to go for counseling.” He was talking about the women that come in and out of your life. spending every waking hour together. But later in life when I became better with women. I was bitter towards her. and had the names of our future babies already picked out. As you get better with women. The thrill of this relationship lasted about 6 months. asshole. I was now this bitter. Little by little I was ruining her. I got involved in my first serious relationship my freshman year of college. I found myself falling back into this trap. I criticized everything she did. As time went by I became more and more resentful of Jillian. and thought that by ending the relationship with this girl I would break her heart into a million pieces . I had no idea how to break free from her. I was no longer the charming man that won her over.Social Superstar Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/29/2008 It was actually Ross Jeffries who originally coined the phrase “Leave them better then you found them. I made her feel small by talking about her insecurities. 169 . and was dating more and more women.

Soon I became the same person I was years earlier with Jillian. 170 . She was probably waiting for me to make the apology call. You can’t avoid the pain of a breakup… but by delaying it you can make it much worse. I felt like a soulless monster. I was deliberately saying things that I knew would make Kate feel insecure. But I was too lazy to end it.COM I had been dating this girl Kate for like four months. I have realized that it is much less cruel to end a relationship than it is to stay involved with a girl you don’t have feelings for. I explained that I didn’t want anything more than what we had. but was appreciative that I was honest with her. A couple months into the relationship I sensed Nancy was looking for more. I felt good about the way things ended with Nancy. I would openly stare at other girls. and have even fucked from time to time. as our relationship was very low maintenance. I wouldn’t call Kate for days at a time. The way I felt as a person during those times with Jillian and Kate was less than human. I didn’t have that dark cloud surrounding me that I had a few months earlier with Kate. and knew it wasn’t going to go anywhere. It was apparent to me that Kate thought things were more serious than they were. and my self esteem was shot. The lesson I learned was that I was much better off being honest with a girl about how I felt. I no longer viewed myself as the kind of guy who attracts women. Kate figured things out on her own and suddenly stopped calling me. I viewed myself as the kind of guy women should stay away from. She was a bit upset. A few months after Kate I started dating a girl Nancy.The Best of TSBMAG. Since Kate I have changed my ways. We sat down and had the talk. The repercussions of the way you treat a woman echoes throughout your life. My integrity was all but drained. but I never did. and it carried over into the rest of my life. I avoided sex with her. Nancy and I are still friends to this day. Nancy was a fun girl who I enjoyed fucking. I hated the person I was once again becoming. Luckily for me. than I was to string a girl along.

” We call it “the sickness” because once it infects you’re almost powerless against its control. and distance myself from the friend zone that I had previously been regulated to. alluded to her attractiveness. Mack Tight referred to it as when “guys become a needy pile of shit after they become obsessed over a woman. weight loss.Social Superstar The Anatomy of the Sickness Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/30/2008 Mike. and got more touchy feely. and I coined the phrase “the sickness” back in college. insomnia. I became more sexual. Although I won’t pretend that you’ll be able to rid yourself of your obsession. Weeks before the ski trip I began avoiding her before heading up to the mountain. everything came to a boil on a ski trip. slowly she responded to my escalation. I wanted to create a fresh persona. it is still near impossible to battle. The next day she told me it was a mistake and that she liked me too much as a friend to continue. While the only cure for “the sickness” is time… I thought that if I wrote a detailed description of how the sickness infects (using my last battle with it as an example) you guys might be able to keep this as a guide to compare against when you feel it coming on. at the very least. The first night of the ski trip I made a dramatic change in the way I interacted with her. but then usually brings about physical symptoms like nausea. But I persisted again that night. Even as our closest friends tell us to “move on” “play it cool” “forget about her” their words go in one ear and out the other. Although initially she seemed a little taken back. I knew in my head that it was now or never time for making my move. It happens to the best of us… and even though we most likely know we’ve been infected. It corrupts your mind first. We spent the rest of the trip basically locked in my 171 . By the end of the night we were lying on my bed making out. you may be able to avoid some of the classic mistakes that I made. and once again she wound up on my bed with me making out. depression. Justin. vomiting. The Anatomy of the Sickness After slowly falling for one of my female friends over the course of a year. The “sickness” is like oneitis on steroids.

COM bedroom. In fact. So I went against my better instinct and headed to the flower shop on Monday morning. I was still in “play it cool” mode so I decided to hit the bar with a couple of my friends. Friday afternoon I could hardly contain my excitement to possibly spend time with her. I was fairly confident that she felt the same way. our strong connection as friends. I began scanning my brain for reasons why she would be blowing me off. I went against my better instinct and called her. It made sense in my mind. still waiting for the call. Although I left the week in the mountains feeling quite vulnerable. Bad!” I expected an immediate response with her echoing the sentiment. After the bar closed I have an after party back at my house. I figured that what I needed to do was to prove to her that I was really into her. The first couple nights back home went ok. it was like nothing I had experienced before. I began asking the opinion of a few of my friends. She knows I’m a player. I don’t know if it was the sexual tension that had built up over the last year. The girl and I exchanged evening text messages. but I was in a state that I had never previously experienced. or just my flat out physical attraction to her. I was on top of my game. Somewhere in between Saturday and Sunday I convinced myself the reason that she’s avoiding me is because she doesn’t trust that I’m really into her. I was in “play it cool” mode so I figured I would wait a few days to call her. and then remember our wonderful week together in the mountains and get stuck in my mind trying to figure out what went wrong. Quite drunk at this point. The realization that she didn’t call set in. and had arranged for them to be delivered to her 172 . While still at work I sent her a text “I want to see you. I waited and waited… but the response never came. but I wasn’t too worried as she had a habit of flaking throughout our friendship. Saturday morning is when I went into panic mode. To be completely honest.” I would momentarily feel better. And when she didn’t answer I left a message. I had just completed my crowning achievement as a player. I bought the biggest baddest most expensive bouquet of flowers they had. My mind was on the girl a bit. They all reassured me telling me “it's only been a day. I fell asleep that night with the phone in my hand. I would say my confidence was sky high.The Best of TSBMAG.

I decide to still send them. I am plastered but somehow talk her into heading out for a couple drinks with me. My “wet friend” tells me not to answer the phone and give her a taste of her own medicine… but “dry friend” intervenes and I wind up talking her into coming over. As time went by I gave up hope of her calling. I wait till Friday to call her again. get extremely drunk… and take home some 18 year old hostess I worked with. then she leaves. We make out a little while… I eat her pussy. Later in the night I get a call from her thanking me for the flowers.” The next two months are a blur. She is almost frightened to see me. I ask her to hang out but she says she’s tired and is just going to sleep.was me completely shit faced handing her a love letter I wrote her… her taking the letter and leaving… never even calling me to acknowledge it. When she gets to my house she acts nonchalant about not calling… and I forgive her immediately.. Once again… no answer. How the night ended. I’ve finally got her in front of me after two months of playing phone tag… but it's nothing like I imagined. In my mind… she was going to confess her love to me. I proceed to go out with a friend. But even a fresh young 18 year old couldn’t deter me from the beginning of “the sickness. They basically consist of me checking my phone every three minutes to see if she called. tell me how much she’s missed me… and wind up cuddled next to me on my bed. 173 . The few times she actually does call or text… I am too weak to play the game. The next morning I debate whether or not to cancel the flowers. Monday night she calls me at one in the morning. I try to play it cool and act like I don’t care. Finally two months later I get really drunk and show up at her work. For a minute or two I tell myself I’m not going to call her back… but then I give in and call. She keeps avoiding seeing me. Then later in moments of weakness I send her text messages asking “what's going on with us” and other shit I get nauseous thinking about.Social Superstar work Tuesday night… complete with a really embarrassing card basically professing my love..

” It was clear she didn’t want to talk about it. and never would imagine her to be into him… but as I got drunker it made more and more sense.. So I did the only thing a drunken sick bastard could do… I followed him into the bathroom and punched him square in his jaw. The next thing I know we’re ushered out to the parking lot… We’re rolling on the pavement pounding on each other’s skulls… sticking fingers in our eyes..The Best of TSBMAG. I had friends that still worked there. But as I got drunker the cool guy shell I had been putting on was slowly cracking. I began asking her questions alluding to “the weekend we spent together. Bobby Rio woke up the next morning at Rock Bottom...” But I couldn’t leave well enough alone.COM The mess that Bobby Rio had become was finally starting to put the pieces of his life back together. 174 . I was banging chicks left and right. He was dating a new girl… finally starting to get over “the sickness. always the one with the control and calling the shots… And I fell like a toy soldier. I’m going to leave this story without commentary. I think I may have even bit him. The night started out pleasant enough… I spent time catching up with a handful of old friends… chatting with her whenever the occasion would allow. I didn’t feel threatened because I knew the guy. So once again. I go out get completely shit faced and show up at her work party with one of my friends. It is simply meant to show how the sickness can take hold of anyone. Everything was becoming crystal clear… (In my drunken distorted mind) SHE WAS FUCKING THIS GUY. Then I began noticing that she and one of her co-workers were awfully close. At that point in my life I already knew everything there was too know. Finally the rest of the party breaks up the fight… they put me in a cab and send my sad sick drunk ass home. I knew that there would be an annual Christmas party at the place she worked.

and is an excellent place to start… ultimately you still won’t be living with passion.Social Superstar Living with Passion Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 05/19/2008 The first time I heard that phrase it was from an Anthony Robbins CD. It gives them something to get excited about every morning. It gives them something fascinating to talk to about. My desire to see the world is stronger than my desire for any girl or to 175 . everything. It gives them something to strive for. For Mystery it is his love of magic and showmanship. The greatest pickup artists in the world usually have a passion in their life greater than seducing women. I used body language. for Extramask its comedy… What living with a higher passion does for each of these PUAs is it gives them a reason to exist other than picking up women. At first I tried to artificially create a sense of passion in my life. You may be asking. although I found it motivating. and voice tonality to present a passionate looking man to the world. for Christian Hudson its entrepreneurship. I didn’t truly grasp the concept of living with passion. Bobby Rio’s passion in life is traveling the world. for Cajun and Mehow its theatre. something that gives meaning to their existence. And as Sebastian Drake talked about in our recent interview with him. “what does living with passion have to do with improving my skills at attracting women?” My answer is. physiology. Six years ago I headed down to Buenos Aires. While improving areas of your non verbal communication may make you look and feel like a more passionate person. At the time. That trip ignited a passion in me that burns strongly to this day. improving these things will create a sense of “passive value” for you… and eventually you might even begin to feel a bit more passionate in your day to day activities. for Neil Strauss it's his love of journalism. Argentina for a couple weeks to visit a friend. for Tyler Durden its adventure.

I think that the first step in cultivating your passion is to ask yourself. How this relates to pickup and seduction Since no one can ever take my love of travel away from me… I never attach excess meaning to winning or losing with a particular girl. “If money wasn’t an issue. what would I be doing with my life?” Really taking time to think about this question will begin to give you a deeper understanding into what internally drives you.COM make any amount of money.” Discovering and cultivating your passion is an area that we are going to discuss in much more detail during our Mansformation Weekend Retreat. 176 . In fact. I will never work a job that does not give me the flexibility to travel often (2 weeks vacation a year won’t cut it) nor will I date a girl who won’t just get up and go on a wild adventure with me. it defines a lot of my criteria for jobs and relationships.The Best of TSBMAG. I live with a willingness to walk away from any girl… And like Life Coach Justin says in his Build it and they will Come article. ironically. this will attract women. My happiness is never defined by how many notches I’ve added to my belt. “this will help you have a strong basis for your self-esteem outside of your success with women. and that.

Focus on One Goal. For instance. Here are 7 Ways to Motivate You Out of a Slump 1. the mere thought of the time and energy involved in starting a relationship can scare the crap out of you. Now that you’ve been talking to two new people a day for a week… challenge yourself a bit and start flirting with those two new people. And then when we try to get back on track. Many times the reasons we fall into slumps is because we’ve so over whelmed by everything going on in our life that we choose to negate it all. And other times we go through a health slump where we seem to just entirely let ourselves go. This prevents people from making any effort at all to interact with new people. 2.Social Superstar 7 Secrets for Getting out of a Slump Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/25/2008 Slumps are a part of human nature. We all go through them. Once you’re no longer missing the $25 a month… start saving $35. Instead of focusing on building a relationship. we can’t figure out where to even start. Once you’ve started small you should be able to develop a new routine.000 credit card debt… just focus on paying off $25 a month. focus on just talking to a couple new people a day. It is impossible to stay energized and 177 . Use Small Successes to Build Momentum.instead commit to taking one long walk around your block every night. If you’re dreading putting seven days a week in at the gym. 3. Once you’ve got in the habit of taking a walk every night. One of the biggest obstacles people face in overcoming slumps is they become intimidated by the task at hand. Effectively removing yourself from a slump can be a struggle. Start Small. the further along you seem to fall into it. Other times we go through a dating slump (draught) where it seems like we’ll never kiss a girl again. The trick is to gradually build momentum based on small accomplishments. Sometimes we get in a financial slump where we just can’t get caught up on bills. if you’ve been single for a long time. do a few crunches when you get home from it. but with the right motivation you can get right back on track in no time. If you want to get your finances in order don’t dwell on how you’re going to pay off that $15. The most frustrating thing about slumps is that more you try to get out of one.

and broke… pick the goal that you think will be the best catalyst for improving the other areas later on. And when that gust dies down… to know that it will arrive again shortly. In the time where you’re motivation is lacking. Get Inspired. everywhere you go.COM focused on improving too many areas at once. I find its best to let a few select people in on your planned outcome… and ask for their help in achieving it. If you’re piss poor and think it’s impossible to change your situation read blogs and books from people who were in similar financial states and gone on to make millions. Write your goal on an index card and put it in your pocket. Find someone who will push you through the rough times. 4. You’re not always going to be 100% motivated. When you find yourself losing focus or motivation… pull out the index card and reread your goal. The trick is that when you’re feeling that gust of motivation to ride it out as long as possible. 5. When you read over your goal make sure you’re visualizing yourself as having achieved it. If you’re goal is to get better talking to women. There are some people out there who just don’t like seeing other people succeed. The point is you need to continually inspire yourself and at the same time remind yourself that it is completely possible. And ask for advice… Or hang out with guys in the process of changing themselves as well. If you’re lonely. its best to spend that time 178 . 6. read the hundreds of stories of guys who were 30 year old virgins who went on to date some of the most beautiful women in the world. It is much better to just pick one goal that you are committed to achieving right away. Motivation comes and goes. Stare at it and visualize it for however long it takes to snap you back into the right frame of mind. It’s quite possible that you’ll find the mere habit of working out daily will motivate you to meet more people and get your finances in order. hang around guys who have already improved that area. Carry your Goal Around With You.The Best of TSBMAG. 7. If you’re looking to get into better shape find a good workout buddy. These are not the kind of people you want to associate yourself with. If you’re not having luck meeting a significant other. out of shape. Find some Good Wingmen and Avoid the Negative. You really need to avoid the people in your life who bring about a negative influence. Realize Motivation Comes and Goes. that goal will be right beside you. Every day. It is pretty hard to accomplish something completely on your own.

179 .Social Superstar reading up on your goals. and talking to your wingmen. revising your plan. This will prevent you from falling back into the slump.

Alex Rodriguez is as good as he is because he is able to learn to master his emotions. He is as good as he is because he is able to acknowledge the emotion of disappointment or frustration. In fact. and owners are going to share their opinion on it. He does this knowing that journalists around the country are going to talk about it. Once he 180 . maybe he took his eye off the ball for a split second too long. So there is no reason he can’t overcome them in the future. He does this in front of 50. and fans are going to discuss it. or maybe the pitcher was just having a damn good day.The Best of TSBMAG. He then looks for the lesson that was offered from the situation. and the manager. I think we would all agree he must have rock solid inner game. Maybe he is swinging for fences instead of just trying to make contact. teammates.COM Can You Control Your Emotions Like Arod? Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 Inner game is not about succeeding every time. He can move on because he knows that in the past he’s overcome slumps. In order to be as good a baseball player as Alex Rodriguez.000 people live. Or even a collection of experiences. and millions of people watching on television. Once he realizes what action causes the frustration he can move on. If every time he went up to the plate he reminded himself how much pressure was on him… how would he ever possibly hit the ball? If every time he struck out or grounded into a double play he dwelled in the emotion of frustration or disappointment… how would he ever gather the courage to walk back up to the plate. Alex Rodriguez does not get a hit every time he goes up to the plate. there are times the bases are loaded. the game is on the line… and he strikes out. Can you imagine any more possible pressure? My point is you’re not good or bad based on one experience.

an angry manager. 181 .Social Superstar knows that he is certain of his ability to overcome it again. he goes and works with the hitting coach to fix the flaw in his artillery. and pessimistic critics. Chances are you don’t face anywhere near the kind of pressure Arod does. or scoring home runs. This mean you can play the game and have as much fun with it as possible. No one is paying attention to whether you’re striking out every night. If you learn to control them… you’re on your way to inner game. You don’t face the wrath of millions of fans. The only wraths you face are your emotions. disappointed teammates.

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Going Down in Flames
Written by Alex Strandberg Original Published: 07/03/2008

We all care way too much what a complete stranger that knows nothing about us thinks. Fear of rejection is the underlying emotion in most approaches. The thought of a beautiful woman sitting there and calling you a loser in front of the entire club makes most guys stomachs turn in knots. Sort or ironically, being rejected will bring the most success with women into your life. Let me explain Internally most guys think that they are complete lonely losers that no one could love. They greatly fear that women will find this out and have no desire for them. They learn all these cool lines and tricks but that fear of being thought of as a loser by women and confirming their already held beliefs is still strong. It carries so much weight that it cripples them from being comfortable in interactions or EVEN APPROACHING WOMEN. They try their hardest to avoid getting “rejected” in order to avoid facing their own belief system. They try their very best to do everything “right "and LOOK COOL but by the very act of trying they are doing everything wrong. From this they place way too much importance on getting a good re-action from the girl and becoming very outcome dependent and needy. If the interaction goes well they get a false sense of self esteem from the girl and feel good. If it goes badly then that fear of actually being a loser is triggered and they feel terrible. When you are outcome dependent you become very attached to what the girl thinks of you. This just breeds of insecurity and neediness which if you hadn’t guessed is a HUGE TURN OFF for women. Women are attracted to men who could take or leave any woman. Not caring whether the woman comes, stays, lays or prays seems very counter intuitive but it's what will get you the “best” results and lead to a happier and more peaceful life.


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In addition to this fear of being rejected is a fear of the unknown. If you are just starting out in approaching or have done a couple of approaches the fear of the unknown is still lingering in the background. This fear makes your mind race at a hundred miles per hour with a million Questions: “what if she pours a drink on me?” “What if she rejects me and all the people in the club laugh at me and I am humiliated?” “What if this happens?” “What if that happens?” And so on. The only way around fear of the unknown is to go straight through it and become comfortable with ambiguity of approaching and life. When you get rejected badly and the initial sting wears down you will find it hilarious how some girls will treat a complete stranger who was just saying Hi to them and being friendly. Part of the reason why they felt the need to reject you badly is how annoyed they are at being hit on all day by guys who haven’t a clue. Another part of it is the pleasure they get from rejecting guys. They love the feeling of having the power to control another person's state of emotions through their own actions. One of the biggest fears that guys carry around with them is a fear of going back to who they were before they learned of the seduction community or any self help stuff. They remember how they felt before knowing any better, the loneliness, the feeling or being powerless and useless in driving the direction of their own lives. Guy’s develop a debilitating fear of being rejected because they fear that they will go back to who they were in the past. As a result, they avoid rejection at all costs. My suggestion: Go out with the intention of getting rejected HARD. Like any fear, the only way around it is to go through it. Getting rejected, laughed at, drink thrown in face is NOT A BIG DEAL. It’s not a big deal but you need to go through harsh and “embarrassing” rejection in order to realize that it doesn’t matter what some anorexic club ho who has NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE thinks of you. Hypnotica walked around for two months unshowered, unshaven, in a dress with a dildo strapped to his head in order to get over caring about what other people think. This is a great thing to do but it’s not very practical to people with jobs and obligations. Alternatively, you can go out as many times as needed with the intention of getting rejected.

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Here are a couple of things you can do to go down in flames: -Go up to a girl or a group of girls and ask them “hey, do you like salads? I like croutons that come with salads” It’s a very stupid and ridiculous question to ask to girls in a club but it will help you get over trying to look cool and caring what they think of you. -Go up to a girl and in a suave and cheesy way say “Daddy’s home” but try not to crack up laughing before you deliver the line. After you say these two things or make up your own, DON’T try and recover and get the girl-just make the approach as bad as you can possibly make it. You might feel uneasy and dumb saying these things but those feelings will eventually go away. Each time you get rejected badly you will get closer and closer to not giving a shit what other people think about you and you will stop caring about the outcome of the situation. Releasing attachment and concern for other’s opinion of you will GREATLY improve your success with women and all other areas of your life. After a while you will actually begin to enjoy being rejected because of how funny it will become to you. Your skin will be so thick that nothing she does will be any concern of yours. It will no longer send you down a spiral of depression and completely ruin your night. I’m sort of sadistic in nature; I’m not sure what I enjoy more, being rejected badly or getting the girl. I’m leaning towards to former because getting the girl is enjoyable but getting rejected harshly in a hilarious way is damn entertaining. -Alex


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Bust Through Your Comfort Zone
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/08/2008

I´m sitting here at an outdoor internet cafe in Medellin, Colombia staring at the beautiful city surrounded by mountains, and all I can think is ¨just three years ago I used to shit myself at the thought of vacationing to Colombia.¨ I would literally freeze up imagining myself alone in Colombia. I had visions of corrupt police, rampant drug wars, kidnappings, violence, and theft. Although I had visited Brazil and Argentina on several occasions, Colombia was on a short list of places that I was too scared to venture. Well, all it took was the persuasion of one hot Colombian girl, and here I am. It's my third day here and I feel this incredible weight lifted off of my shoulders. I have always prided myself in my sense of adventure... and I cringed at the thought that there were places I was avoiding out of fear. Well, I broke through my fear... only to find that they were completely unwarranted. Yes, completely unwarranted. Like most of our fears. I´ve been giving a lot of thought about what contributes to that stealth inner game that some guys seem to have. I´ve actually been building a list of traits and actions we can make our own to slowly reach that unstoppable confidence we all want. And on that list is: THE DRIVE AND ABILITY TO BREAK THROUGH OUR COMFORT ZONES We all have comfort zones. We are comfortable with a certain group of friends. We are comfortable at certain bars and clubs. We are comfortable dating a certain scale of girls. We are comfortable performing a certain type of job. We are comfortable making a certain income... But what I´ve come to realize is that the truly confident and successful people rarely stay in their comfort zone long. Confident, successful people are always looking to push and challenge themselves. They are

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always on the lookout for new opportunities that will inspire them to be an even better person. The main reason that most of us stay in our comfort zone is fear. Sure, we will claim to really like hooking up with chubby girls. Or really love that townie bar around the corner from our house.... but what we are really saying is ¨We are not willing to take the risk to find out if something better exists.¨ But the fact remains: Something better does exist. But we won´t ever attain it if we aren´t willing to sacrifice comfort for a little while. Here is my advice: Take Action Make a list of people, places, and actions that are a part of your comfort zone. Do you go to the same hair stylist because you love their haircut, or are you afraid to try someone else? Do you find yourself heading to the same bar? Buying the same polo t-shirts? Hitting on the same scale of girls? Going for the same type of job? Make a list of everything that falls within your comfort zone. Once you´ve created a list of things that make up your comfort zone; make another list. This is your Action List. On this list write down one step you can take towards breaking out of your comfort zone. Write the name of a bar you´ve always wanted to check out. Write the image change you´ve been dying to make. Write down the job you´ve always wanted to apply for. Now look at that list. And do everything on it. You want unstoppable inner game? Then do it. Do it.


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10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive
Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 04/06/2008

You want to see immediate results? You want to start getting more phone numbers, more looks, more compliments? Then implement these simple ten steps now and you’ll have more dates than you can handle. Tip #1- Improve your Posture Most people don’t realize the importance of posture. But it says more about you than anything that comes out of your mouth. Bad posture can make you look bored, depressed, or just plain homely. Improving your posture starts with becoming aware of it. Just being aware of excessive slouching will force you to take action right then. Toning your muscles through exercise will also help enhance posture. Place your head squarely on top of your neck, make sure your shoulders are upright and your back is arched forward. This will make you appear taller and more confident. Be sure to leave your arms relaxed and loose. A great way to improve posture is to remain active throughout the day. This will prevent your body from being molded the wrong way. Tip #2- Smile A smile can literally light up a room. A man or woman who walks around flashing a smile will always be perceived to be more attractive. With a healthy smile, we are able to transmit the emotions within our hearts. It is very true that our smile reflects our mood, personality and even our inner health. Smiling makes you seem warmer, more inviting, confident, happy… but the best part is that a great smile can make someone else feel all of these same emotions and attach them to you. The best way to improve your smile is by practicing in front of a mirror. Make sure that what you're intending as a smile isn’t coming off as a smirk. Also pay attention to your teeth. Nice teeth are a cornerstone of a good smile. If you’re teeth are yellow consider getting them whitened. It is also important to stay on top of dentist visits. Tip #3- Tanning

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Don’t misunderstand this tip as a call for you to turn yourself into an orange oompa loompa. Orange skin is not attractive. But some healthy looking color can benefit anyone, especially in the winter time when our complexions tend to get pale. I would generally recommend tanning a few times a month. I usually go just enough to have color, but not so much that people can recognize that I’ve been tanning. Tan skin makes you look thinner, healthier, and tends to make your clothes look better against your skin. It also helps hide imperfections in your complexion. Tip #4- Be Flirtatious Someone who knows how to flirt effectively will always attract more of the opposite sex than someone who solely relies on their looks. Flirting is an art form that if you can master you will be a few steps ahead of the competition. Flirting is essential in creating sexual tension. They key to flirting is achieving a sense of relaxed playfulness. Teasing is a great way to flirt. As is competitive flirting which takes the form of slight sarcasm and dry wit. Cooperative flirting is different. Rather than jabbing her, you pull her into your reality and create an “us against the world” dynamic. Flirting is a mix of pushing away with words and pulling in with actions. In the game of flirting think back to how you acted towards that classmate you had a crush on in the fourth grade… and act the same exact way. Tip #5- Get an Expensive Haircut The haircut needs to be great. It is very easy to go the cheap route when it comes to getting your haircut and head to the local Supercuts. This won’t cut it if your goal is to immediately make yourself more attractive. The key here is going to a salon that has a great reputation. These salons will usually cost you much more than your local barber… but it's worth it. Movie stars look like movie stars because they have the best that money can by making them look that way. Even if it is only a one time deal you deserve to get a “movie star” haircut. Stylists at these salons know how to shape a haircut around your particular face, head size, and personal style. There will be a huge difference. Even if you can’t afford to

facial hair (especially if you’re a girl). controlling dandruff. So if we see an average looking girl hanging around a bunch of models we will tend to look for her better qualities to justify her being there. You can usually find dance lessons locally. the more attractive the company you keep. I would usually recommend taking a few individual lessons before you jump into the 189 . at least you can take some pictures of yourself and plaster your MySpace profile with them! Tip #6. The lessons are usually available in group form and individual form. acne. cleaning wax out of your ears. Tip #7.Stay Well Kept and Well Groomed There are grooming tips that you can implement immediately that will drastically increase your attractiveness.Hang Around Attractive People Humans look for short cuts when it comes to forming their own opinions. It is much easier to let others guide us. or other skin conditions. the more attractive you will be perceived to be. This includes nose hair.Learn how to Dance If you want to attract the attention of the opposite sex during a night on the town you should consider learning how to dance. We tend to look for reasons that will support our reality. And pluck your eye brows. The same can be said for an average looking guy who walks into a bar with a beautiful woman… everyone in the bar will look for his positive qualities to reason it. A good dancer is immediately perceived to be more sexual. thus increasing their perceived attraction. Tip #8. The first is getting rid of all unwanted hair. Therefore.Social Superstar continually get your hair cut at these more expensive salons. and inappropriate body hair. On the other end if you’re an above average looking person but you hang out with the local riff raft people will look for your negative qualities to explain why you’re slumming. If you are not a naturally good dancer I would recommend taking some dance lessons. People like to make opinions quickly. Others actions that you can take is cutting your nails. Eliminating a unibrow alone can change the look of your face. And one of the easiest ways to do this is to lump you in with the company you keep. ear hair.

Good use of accessories will make you more noticeable in a crowd. the purchase of a good cologne or perfume is a great investment. Accessories are items you can add to your outfit to give you some added flash.Add Accessories to your Wardrobe If you take notice of most celebrities the one thing you’ll find in common with all of them is that they all make use of accessories. you should seriously consider added some flash to your look. And can spark animal like sexual attraction. It may cost a few dollars but you will be amazed to see what kind of response you get next time you're asked out onto the dance floor. Once you purchase a fragrance make sure you put just the right amount of it on. necklaces. Tip #10. There is a term called “peacocking” which means purposely dressing in a way to draw attention to you. bracelets. My recommendation is to sample a few different brands and ask a member of the opposite sex to judge. Accessories include belts. There is a theory that pheromones play a huge part in sexual attraction and I would not argue with that at all. the better you smell. It is the sense that provokes the most intense emotions. While you may not choose to go that extreme. Adding these things to an outfit shows that you put thought into the way you look. and that you are confident in your ability to pull off wearing these things.COM group classes. Ideally you can have several different men or women give you their opinions on which one is the best. earrings. Although taste is subjective. 190 . hats.The Best of TSBMAG. the more attractive you will be appear to the opposite sex. Too much of a good thing can be a turn off. Tip #9. glasses. watches. and scarves.Smell Good Smell is one of the brain’s strongest senses. One thing is for certain.

Three to four sessions a week of intense jogging.Social Superstar 3 Tips for Abs of Steel Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/19/2008 Abs are like a prized possession. 1. the Stairmaster. It will take a minimum of three to four days a week of intense cardio to burn the amount of calories needed to shed fat around your gut. Proper Nutrition: I think a problem many people have is that once they start working out and burning calories they look at it as a free pass 191 . It is the most intense. 2. and taking aerobics classes are beneficial as well. which in turn bring up the value of anyone who takes off their shirt to display a six pack. Cardio. they disappear in an instant. and effective method of burning calories. Everyone knows that the trick to getting rid of fat is cardio. and Cardio: You can do a million crunches a day… but if you’ve got a solid layer of fat covering your abs you’ll never see them. Cardio. the elliptical. efficient. What people fail to realize is that the cardio needs to be intense. But sometimes it's good to remember how basic it can be to get what we want… with the proper discipline. Nothing beats jogging or running. jumping rope. or biking should be enough to get the process in gear. They seem almost elusive at times. hiking. For me though. Swimming. although they looked SWEET! Unfortunately I let myself go over the last year… and we all know that while abs take awhile to build. the periods in my life where I’ve had abs… have always been more about the sense of personal accomplishment then about how they looked…. 20 minutes on the treadmill while reading a magazine and chatting on the phone won’t cut it. Here are three tips that I’ve found helpful during the times in my life that I’ve reached my desired outcome. running. This makes people fascinated with them.. These are no secrets… Because there is no short cut. What makes abs so desirable is that most people aren’t willing to put in the effort it takes to get them..

Don’t swing with the hips. Drink at least a gallon of clean water each day as well.Grab the triceps rope. or let it lie on your upper chest. triceps. pecs. only. you need to create enough resistance where your abs are forced to work. and fats minimal (10%). It will help in nutrient absorption and digestion and will help flush toxins from the body. The whole point of spending all that time burning calories is to start burning the excess fat. The Five Best Abs Exercises Weighted Crunches . Just a slight. It’s basically a crunch. then back up. Would you work your biceps out with no resistance? Or your chest? Here’s an important key. you need to add resistance (weight) to your abs exercises. you are not using the abs very much if you do. You should keep protein intake high (approximately 50% of daily calories). and perform regular crunches. forcefully contracting your abs on the way down. you are on your knees. you’ll never get to the point where you’re body starts converting fat into energy. and glutes.Grab a dumbbell. But the contraction is the same. I seriously know girls who finish their workouts and head to Hagen Daz for a Sundae. Abs are muscles just like biceps. You are now using your abs more to work against the leverage the dumbbell has created. The same goes for abdominals. Cable Rope Crunches . Not eating on time or at all is almost as bad as eating too much. but no more. hold for a couple seconds. If you want proper abs development. under your chin.The Best of TSBMAG. kneel on your knees. Stick with a heavy enough weight where you can handle 10-15 reps. If you’re filling yourself up with shitty foods. 192 . Working out Your Abs: The biggest mistake that most people make when trying to build abdominal muscle is that they do sets of crunches or sit ups without any resistance.COM to pig out. and bend downwards. You need resistance to properly strengthen and build them. either hold it in front of your face. carbs moderate (40%). Remember. But it is important to get something in you. 30 degree contraction until you feel the abs contract.

These can be done on the end of a bench as well. 193 . A couple months of intense workouts are a small price to pay for abs of steel. do not swing all the way down. Wrap your feet around a small dumbbell.Lie flat on your has a really great free personal trainer course that will set you in the right direction. hold for a couple seconds. which is your abs and lower back. Start with your feet about 6 inches from the ground. As you can see doing these exercises while adding some resistance will build muscle much quicker and in larger gains. If at the same time you’re eating healthy and burning calories you should be seeing results in a couple months. just far enough (30 degrees) to fully contract the abs. and perform leg raises. then back up. They are effective at strengthening your core region. If you’re unsure of proper nutrition or just need a good plan to follow Bodybuilding. This is very similar to Cable rope crunches.Working on the stability ball will incorporate balance into your abdominal work. Stability Ball Crunches . then raise them about 12-16 inches from the ground and then back down slowly.Once again. with your hands tucked under your butt.Social Superstar Weighted Leg Raises . Seated Abs Machine .

You know… the $1 Miller Light draft or the $3 Margarita. “what the hell happened last night?” So the real question isn’t should you or shouldn’t you drink when you hit the bars… the real question is what kind of drink will best serve your purpose. and slurring your words… but you don’t have as much fun. We can argue semantics… but I’ll just say you’ll never see Bobby Rio clinging to a club soda. You don’t think I actually enjoy the endless rounds of SoCo and lime shots I guzzle down. The rules bend a little depending on the location… but certain ones are set in stone.The Best of TSBMAG. Yea… you’re game tends to be a little tighter when you’re not red faced. do you? I mean all of my most memorable nights have involved me waking up. wobbly. and to make you look cool in the process. Never order anything they are going to serve you in a plastic cup. Your drink always serves two purposes: to get you hammered. these are all part of the show. looking at the girl next to me and thinking. or bottom shelf tequila drowned in sour mix… but you look cheap drinking 194 . These drinks not only taste like shit as they’re usually stale beer. You tend to find this atrocity at bars that are near college campuses. If I drank alone I’d probably be sipping Bay Breezes or some kind of Dairies. These plastic cup drinks are usually reserved for the drink special of the night. or the unnecessary twelve packs I always grab for the after party. Shit I hate the taste of booze.COM A Manly Guide to Choosing Your Drink Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 06/30/2008 There is a dirty rumor in the pick-up community claiming it is better to stay sober when gaming women in bars and clubs. maybe a Pina Coloda… but there are certain rules you need to follow in social environments. No.

Because someone is going to hear you order it. anything with a novelty name like Alabama Slammer. Never order anything frozen or served in a novelty glass with a funny straw… unless you’re sitting on a beach in the Caribbean.” Generally. Buttery Nipple. Manhattan. Rocks glasses are cool. And I don’t care how good you think it taste… you are never ever to order a Cosmo. 195 . Remember clear or brown… I don’t care how much you liked the Big Lebowski it’s never acceptable to order a White Russian. Never.Social Superstar them. You think this one would be self explanatory but I never fail to see some schlep slurping on Mudslide wondering why he hasn’t been laid in a year. or Kamikaze is off limits. A safe bet is to order something your grandfather would have drank. and you don’t want to have to respond “Fuzzy Navel. or inevitably some girl will ask you what you’re drinking. Back in his day. I would pay extra to have them pour it in a pint glass. It doesn’t much matter what’s in the glass so long as it’s clear or brown. rusty nail… they didn’t ruin the integrity of their vodka by splashing cranberry juice in it. Let’s face it. rye and coke. Drinking one of the “vacation” drinks sends out the vibe that you don’t get out often. and they drank scotch on the rocks. In fact it says that your life sucks so bad that trolling around this shitty bar is actually an “event” for you.” Your first reaction may be to spit out “Michelob Ultra” but you need to regroup and imagine what your grandfather would have ordered. even if I planned on drinking Miller anyway. Sex on the Beach. What does it say to everyone that you will sacrifice the enjoyment of your drink to save a buck? Hell. Anything ordered on the rocks looks cool. Never. men were men. Malibu Bay Breeze. There will be times when you freeze like a deer in headlights when the bartender asks “what you drinking. The name of the drink is more important than what is inside it. The only exception to this rule is ordering a Margarita at a Mexican joint.

COM So remember it is quite alright to get a little sauced when you hit the bars… in fact I even encourage it.The Best of TSBMAG. But you must look cool in the process. 196 .

the side effects can be brutal in the short term… and deadly in the long term. Taking steroids is a coward’s way out that leads nowhere fast.Social Superstar 7 Steps to aturally Boost Testosterone Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/09/2008 There seems to be a huge fascination with guys taking steroids lately. Not only are steroids an expensive habit. I’m going to give you tips to naturally increase your testosterone. Instead of cheating and doing it the artificial way that will drain your wallet and health. This is not to say that your body couldn’t benefit from extra testosterone. Here’s the biology behind testosterone: 197 . and even a slight increase in its level will provide many amazing benefits. While they would tell themselves it was going to be only one time… soon they became reliant on them and were doing cycle after cycle. Testosterone is the most important muscle building hormone in your body. To put it bluntly. Benefits of increased testosterone’ * Increase in strength and muscle size * Body fat decrease * Increased sex drive and endurance * More energized and motivated * Decrease in bad cholesterol * Makes you more attractive to women Increasing testosterone can be a huge benefit to you. Obviously the major reason being that the increase in testosterone most anabolic steroids produce causes extraordinary gains in muscle mass. In addition to the gains in muscle mass many guys become addicted to the adrenaline rush of having excess testosterone flowing through their veins. I’ve seen many of my friends succumb to the lure of steroids.

These 7 steps will provide that natural boost in testosterone that will leave you feeling more healthy. The EFAs found in peanuts. bench presses. Cortisol is a catabolic hormone that will cause testosterone to plummet. dead lifts. True gains in muscle and testosterone come when you push yourself to the limit at the gym.COM First. or “LH” for short. the adrenal glands release DHEA into the bloodstream. cabbage. 2.The Best of TSBMAG. vibrant. Cortisol is produced during times of high stress or anxiety. If you follow these 7 steps you can avoid having to resort to sticking needles in your ass a couple days a week. It is best to keep your drinking to a minimum and try not to exceed more than three drinks in a night. Exercises that put your muscles under the most amount of stress will force your body to produce more testosterone. Eliminate Binge Drinking. avocadoes. Excessive alcohol consumption can drastically reduce testosterone levels. Have more sex. Sexual stimulation causes the body to increase the production of oxytocin which increases endorphin production (the “feelgood” chemical). sexual. cauliflower. 198 . lunges. dips. Increase consumption of Essential Fatty Acids. You can reduce estrogen by eating more cruciferous vegetables like broccoli. and turnips. 5. Reducing the levels of estrogen (the main female hormone) will greatly increase your testosterone. 7. olives. Reduce Estrogen levels. and canola are a proven natural way to boost testosterone. Once this occurs. and this also raises testosterone. and attractive. LH basically “tells” the body to start producing testosterone. LH and DHEA then travel together to the testes where testosterone production begins. It is also produced during times of lack of sleep. radishes. 6. Limit Cortisol production. and military presses. fish. These exercises include squats. You can also reduce estrogen by limiting the amount of soy protein you take in. Soy has been known to raise estrogen levels which decrease testosterone levels. flaxseed. 4. Push yourself 110% at the gym. 3. Testosterone can now be released into the bloodstream to perform its magic. 1. Fill your work out with compound exercises. the brain releases a substance called Luteinizing Hormone.

but short lived. cake and table sugar. Make sure you consume complex carbohydrates and not just simple carbohydrates. Simple carbohydrates create a short burst of energy that will simply wear off and leave you depressed. jolt of energy I decided to do some research into how I can naturally increase my energy level.Social Superstar How to aturally Increase Energy Levels Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/16/2008 Last night I took my girl to the Bon Jovi concert at MSG. and it took me another hour to wind down enough to sleep. Nutrition. Needless to say. After guzzling the Red Bull and feeling that instant. Think about how much more you would accomplish in life if you had an endless supply of energy. We got home extremely late. 1. Don’t feed your body junk. proteins and complex carbohydrates in your everyday diet. The carbs that you should be taking into your body should be complex carbohydrates such as whole grain bread. You might not get that instant gratification that a Red Bull will give you. Everything listed below will increase your energy level for the long term. but over time you’ll slowly find you no longer need to flood your body with caffeine. 5 Ways to Naturally Increase Your Energy As easy as it seems to pop a Stacker 3. whole grain rice or even apples. Without it we are virtually useless. You’ll simply get fat and become lazier than before. down a Red Bull. 199 . Examples of simple carbohydrates would be candy. Continuously feed your body small amounts of complex carbohydrates to get the most out of your diet. Make sure you get enough fruits. After struggling to find the motivation to begin writing … I decided to hit 7-11 for my second Red Bull of the day. Energy is the fuel we all run on. soda. vegetables. or hit Dunkin Donuts for your fourth cup of coffee… these are all temporary fixes that will leave you even more depleted in the long run. I was exhausted this morning.

Even if you hate the idea of spending time in the gym. The fact is. It includes: * Strengthening the muscles involved in respiration in order to better move oxygen in and out of the lungs. It gets messy and expensive.COM In addition to proper diet you should be taking a multi vitamin every day. I would advice picking up a decent juicer along with a book on good juicing recipes. 2. Another great way to get bursts of nutrients that your body needs is by using a juicer. I actually went through a period of about six months where I had completely given up caffeine and replaced morning coffee with a homemade juice. Conditioning Conditioning is your efficiency to move oxygen and blood to needed parts of the body. Modern diets are usually void of many of the key vitamins and minerals our bodies need. The B vitamins act as coenzymes. joining in a game of basketball or ultimate Frisbee. * Working the body’s muscles which support healthy circulation and blood pressure. to better transport oxygen throughout the body. Get the right amount of sleep Everyone’s body is different. but on average we need about 7-8 hours of sleep a night. * Increases the number of red blood cells in the body. Conditioning takes place through daily exercise. most of us don’t exercise nearly as much as we should be. compounds that unite with a protein component called an apoenzyme to form an active enzyme. The enzyme then acts as a catalyst in the chemical reactions that transfer energy from the basic food elements to the body. or just taking a morning power walk around the park.The Best of TSBMAG. 3. you can be taking a jog at the track. but it truly works wonders for energy. If you live an exceptionally active life style you might want to supplement with an additional B complex. By taking a daily multi vitamin you can be sure you’ll be getting the daily recommended amount of all of them. What most people fail to realize is that even though you’ve 200 .

If you know you have a tendency to toss and turn for an hour before finally falling asleep. I said supplements.lie down an hour earlier. If you still find that you’re having trouble getting a thorough night sleep you might want to take some supplements that support sleep patterns such as ZMA and Melatonin. Being forced to look at your goals forces you to think about what you have to do to achieve them. If you find you have to continually go to the bathroom throughout the night. You also want to avoid getting too much sleep. found myself too hot. Everywhere I look from the minute I wake up. In this photo album or collage paste pictures of things you’re striving for. I find that when I stay in bed an extra hour or two in the morning. I’ve taped the index cards to my computer. the body you want. Sometimes we need to be motivated by the promise of extreme pleasure or the fear of extreme pain. You need to make sure that you are getting 8 hours of restorative sleep.Social Superstar been lying in your bed for 8 hours does not mean you got 8 hours of solid sleep. I would advise you to avoid sleeping more than the recommended 8 hours. adjusting the pillow every 3 minutes… before finally falling asleep at about 2:30. There is no hiding from them. Using myself as an example. got up several times to use the bathroom. Motivation One of the surest ways to get you pumped full of energy is to get yourself in a completely motivated state. I am forced to stare at my goals. I tend to be lifeless the rest of the day. I tossed and turned. the girl you 201 . Remember. Knowing what your goals are is not always enough to motivate some of us. not sleeping pills. and to my television. to my bathroom mirror. These pictures can include pictures of the car you want. limit your beverage intake to two hours before bedtime. and then too cold. A good way to stay motivated is to create a picture album or collage of your goals. One of the ways that I’ve been doing that lately is by writing all of my goals on index cards. last night after lying in bed at about 1:00 am. 4.

even on days I skip listening to the audio. 202 . do a great job of pumping me up. when I hear these songs I get that burst of motivation I usually feel on the treadmill. On the opposite side of that. I am naturally more energized in the morning. These speakers. Every morning. If you’re trying to lose weight. If you listen to a certain song continually during times you feel completely motivated… you’ll be able to recreate that feeling just by hearing the song. For some people the pain of seeing themselves look less than desirable will motivate them to get off their ass.The Best of TSBMAG. I have been flooding my mind with motivational audio programs like Tony Robbins. the first thing I do is listen to one hour of one of these speakers on my IPod. and force yourself to see it daily. I will make sure I play these songs while I’m busting my butt on cardio as they always push me to go the extra mile. There are a couple songs I listen to over and over again at the gym.COM want. Anchoring This is something that I’ve been using lately to great success. the career you want… Anything that will inspire you and get your mind racing. Jim Rohn. you can post a picture of yourself with your less than ideal body weight. I’ve found that since I’ve gotten used to being pumped up in the morning from the audio… that now. especially Tony Robbins. If you follow these 5 tips you should be able to slowly wean yourself off the Red Bull. 5. take a picture of yourself in a swim suit. Music is another great way to create an anchor. and Jack Canfield. I’ve done this with working out. What has been remarkable is that even away from the gym.

hats. • • • They always wear (piece of clothing) because it goes with everything A majority of their wardrobe is the med to their personal interests Most of the stuff is old and anything new was a onetime purchase (event) You Need Some Clarity So you want to dress cool and be hip? It all starts with understanding what you’re working with and getting rid of what you don’t wear.Social Superstar How to Redo Your Wardrobe Written by Michael Stoute Original Published: 07/24/2008 This is a 3 part series I am writing about how to redo your wardrobe. Now organize everything by type. A common problem is that men put things away because it’s “winter” clothes and then forget about them over time. One of the biggest problems I see when I look at what guys wear. shoes. This makes things hard for a number of reasons. You have to manage your wardrobe just like your food supply. this article is about how to throw away your clothes to get ready to redo your wardrobe. t-shirts. replace it with more so you can stay style fat! After you have everything organized. Organize by Type Get all your clothes together. There is a reason that you do this first and you will understand by the next article in the series. Go down stairs or in the attic and pull out everything you own for all seasons and events. is that there is little or no synergy with the entire wardrobe. When you’re running out of something. I mean all of them. shorts. shirts. suits and underwear. or better yet their closet. jackets. pants. not season. sport coats. Yes. never forget the underwear… 203 .

Now I want you to either write down or take pictures (preferred) of what you currently have and wear on a regular basis. What’s’ Left? If you haven’t been clothes shopping too much lately then you are probably left over with a relatively small amount of clothing. These are your staple outfits that you currently wear. Homework Study the remaining clothes or pictures of them and get ready for Part 2. Most people only wear 15-25 different items on a regular basis yet everyone has a closet full of crap. Mix and Match I want you to go through all your remaining clothes and see what actually goes together.COM Throw it Out! Go through each pile and start throwing out everything you don’t wear. The only way this will work is if you get rid of everything you don’t wear so that you can see what you actively have to work with. pen and paper or in your head Now it’s time to move into the second phase. dump it or wash it and put it in a box somewhere that you will bury as a time capsule for aliens to find in the future.The Best of TSBMAG. Let’s start with colors first. then print them out on a cheap color printer so that you can just cut them out like photos. You have also looked at all the remaining items and studied them. If you take digital pictures. either with photos. If you are looking at something and saying “but I have always had this” or “this is my lucky t-shirt”. then you have already gone through your entire wardrobe and thrown away what you didn’t need following the process I outlined. 204 . If you don’t wear too many colors (like most men) this will not be hard and may not even be necessary. Part 2 If you read the previous post in this series “The Throw Away”.

but just think of it as a kick start to your new image. $250 is a fair amount for a man to spend on his wardrobe in one day. I would say go to Marshalls or some other “Yesterdays Fashion” outlet and look through the clearance racks.Social Superstar Look at what you currently have and see what your outfit possibilities are. Men can typically wear the same or similar jeans over and over without any problem so my guess is that you probably are going to take a bulk of this money and spend it on tops. 205 . You should be able to find 3-4 or more nice things for around $75$100. The reason I wanted you to make 5 different outfits is because you want to be able to “recycle” what you wear every week so that you are not wearing the same thing every day and for laundry reasons as well. The reason this part requires money is simple. then this is a clue where the weakest part of your wardrobe lies. but before you go I want you to remember the 5 outfits that you are working with already and/or take pictures of them with you. clothes cost money and you will always have to invest money into your wardrobe to keep it updated. This way you can wear something different for 10 days and do laundry every 5 days. The jeans should run you about $50$75… Shirts and Tops To start things off you want to pick up 3-4 new shirts/sweaters or some kind of top. Try to make 5 different outfits out of what you have. it’s time to put on the finishing touch on your new wardrobe. always leaving you with clean clothes! (+ $250) Now that you have thrown away unused clothes and picked out some outfits with the remaining. Your initial investment… Take some of your hard earned money and get ready to shop. If you don’t have any decent jeans. Think about the weaker points of your wardrobe and what you need most. I suggest going to the GAP and buying 2 nice pairs of boot cut jeans to add to your current wardrobe. If you used any of the clothing items in more than one outfit. I rarely buy things full price and I always visit the clearance section of every store I go to first. The ideal set of different outfits is 10 in my opinion.

buy the nice button down shirt because is not so flashy and will blend well with your other outfits therefore allowing you to wear it 2-3 times over a 3 weeks period. Same thing with clothes shopping except you are constantly looking for things that will add to and extend your existing wardrobe. You might find a pair or two of decent leather shoes that you can just take to the shoe shop and get shined and fixed up. I like to compare clothes shopping to food shopping because when you go food-shopping you are always thinking of ways to maximize what you currently have in your fridge and cabinets. Shoes are a different story. or Puma family. Take your time and pick out a nice pair of shoes that are not too flashy so that you can wear them with almost anything. If you are looking at a cool shirt. Shoes and Sneakers With the reaming money I would like you to buy a new pair of sneakers or shoes. Stay away from the high end brands for now unless you can afford them of course. whatever fits your current lifestyle better. If you have to buy a new pair I would suggest trying on a lot of different kinds with a pair of jeans on to see which ones look and feel the best. Shoes that are made well will last and if they fall apart can usually be fixed. Before buying a pair of shoes I would look through your closet for any old shoes you may have forgotten about. I would recommend something in the Converse. take a step back and think of how many other things you own and how this shirt can be meshed in with your current clothing arsenal. Adidas.COM Clothes Shopping is like Food Shopping Remember while shopping at the store to keep your current wardrobe inventory in mind. So check out what you already have before spending a lot of money. They tend to stay in style through all of the different fashion cycles. Don’t buy that crazy shirt because you will wear it once every 3 weeks and feel like a pimp. For sneakers. 206 .The Best of TSBMAG. Comfort is so important with shoes and I urge you to make sure they are comfortable or you will never end up wearing them.

With this $100 I would be looking to buy 3 to 4 new items a month. Constantly be buying things that will fit in with what you already have. It has to mesh well with what you already have for you to get the most value out if it. Most men will go shopping for clothes every once in a while and just buy a few things that look good. When you are out shopping. “Pea cocking” without looking like an idiot 207 . then they typically go home and realize that these new items don’t fit in to well with their current wardrobe and get frustrated. I will talk about how to constantly increase your wardrobe at a moderate pace so you don’t go broke and how to “peacock” (stand out) with items no matter what your age or profession. Let’s say you are willing to spend $100 a month to finance your wardrobe (which is not a lot). In the previous two articles we systematically removed clothes you no longer wear and then preceded with a plan to kick start your new wardrobe with a small amount of money. Just because an item of clothing is nice and looks good in the store isn’t enough to buy it. but I would still suggest only buying 1-2 items at a time. You can up the monthly allowance if you like. If you follow this method when buying clothes you will have more outfits than you can think of as time goes on. but in the beginning keep thinks basic using solid colors and common styles. adding new items one at a time. This means you have to go shopping 3-4 times a month. You have to keep that food shopping mentality I talked about in the previous article of the series.Social Superstar And always remember to keep in mind what you already have including what you buy during this process. keep mental notes of what you already have in your closet. Split up the money so you spend around $25 a week on say a new shirt or pair of pants. In this part of the series. There is a time and a place to add a “peacock” aspect to it and I will explain how in the final part of the series. Systems and Schedules The easiest way to keep a nice wardrobe going is to build it in baby steps. Part 3 This is the 3rd and final installment of the How to Redo Your Wardrobe series. As your wardrobe gets bigger you will be able to throw in more “loud” items.

you can’t even wear it anymore. Wherever you are in this phase it doesn’t matter. Styles with young adults change so quickly that I suggest keeping things simple and looking for some trendy items. make sure that they can fit in with what you currently have and aren’t so crazy that when they fade out. On the other hand. the playing field is open to almost anything in the style department. As for the young professionals out there. but still ugly as sh*t.. If you are constantly buying this trendy crap then soon you will have a wardrobe like a clown. great for Kino now that I think of it. if you don’t already. You don’t want to be the person wearing all the different trends because you will look like you are trying too hard. The problem with this concept is that everyone is different and therefore has to “peacock” in a different way.COM Pea cocking is a term that has become associated with men adding certain items to their wardrobe to stand out. Just remember that “staple” items are needed no matter what. Great examples of this were certain brands and t-shits when I was young. This is the time where you are going to be experimenting with a lot of things in life so why not your wardrobe too. BUM Equipment was huge when I was in HS and that sh*t is UGLY! Then there were those heat activated fabrics that changed colors when you touched it. he he What I am basically saying is that as a young person with no job. I feel most of the problem centers around age difference and profession and I will illustrate how you can “peacock” no matter who or where you are in life. Have plenty of solid shirts and pants that you can use when wearing your “trendy” item(s). Age 17-21 This is the age range where you are probably all over the place with finding yourself and an image. stuck in one style because if the people you hang with or just lost altogether and are still wearing the clothes your parents bought you for birthdays.The Best of TSBMAG.. You may be wearing a lot of different styles. I will break this down in 2 separate categories. 208 . Having these “staple” items will allow you to evolve with the trends while maintaining a nice foundation for your entire wardrobe. you have to go with the trend at times to “peacock” and demonstrate that you know what’s up… When you buy trendy items.

jacket and tie or at a minimum.The tie is one of my favorite items to peacock in the professional look.Social Superstar Age 21-30 Professional You are the type of guy that has a nice job where you have to dress in a suit. Most men don’t realize how versatile the tie can really be…For instance. I always go with a Double Windsor and so should you! It is by far the hardest knot to tie. If you are working a job where you have a dress code like this and make crappy money. not the cufflink itself. The problem with cufflinks is that you need to have special shirts to wear them with. If you are a tie freak and own a bunch of wacky designs and stuff then you may want to pick up a few nice silk solids to balance you out. If you haven’t noticed yet. He he… When picking out ties for patterns and colors I tend to stay with solids and thick stripes. but it looks so sweet when done right. plan on buying a few new shirts to go with them. I actually think this is the easiest one to “peacock” out of all the following sections due to the fact you will probably be wearing more clothes in general. Stay away from pattern shirts with ties unless you are absolutely sure it looks good. clean classy and professional. Sport Jackets This is one of my favorite items of clothing and can be done really right or really wrong. cufflinks are for when I wear a tux? Wrong! Yes they are formal. there are 3 or more distinct ways to tie the knot. I tend to stay away from the crazier designs of things and keep to basics. I want to take a quick moment to mention that when having to wear a tie every day. It gives you that full knot that you see in the men’s fashion ads. shirt and tie. you may want to reevaluate your alpha male goals.Now I know what you may be saying. Ties . I have yet to see a better knot that has more girth. your shirts for the most part should be solid colors. which will come with time young Skywalker… Cufflinks . The act of wearing the cufflinks is pea cocking. Do the same with your cufflinks. So if you plan to buy some nice cufflinks. Some guys don’t realize that a sport coat is entirely 209 . but they have been worn for years in regular suits. I am also going to assume that you have some cash in your pocket to go out and accessorize with.

but this situation is pretty rare due to the material and look of suits. Being that you won’t likely be wearing a tie or 210 . The simple fact that you don’t have to tie a slip on combined with the laziness factor of men has caused this style to be played out. Don’t forget to wear nice socks and a matching belt! No god dam white socks!!!! Age 21-30 Business Casual and Outside of Work Now let’s say that you work in a nice place but its business casual and/or you are outside of work. women will notice the smallest pattern and look…after all they addicted to shoes themselves. Forget the designs on the back with that “Ed Hardy” type look. I prefer laces to slip on types because I feel they just look better. When picking out sport coat styles I would again keep it simple. Instead look for cool fabrics to peacock. Shoes Shoes are unique part of any man’s wardrobe and they can say a little or a lot about you. Funny thing is that you see guys wearing jackets from their bar mitzvah’s and communion’s with a hoodie and it looks stupid. Don’t worry. it will either look cheap or you will only be able to wear it once in a while. but over all I feel they are a little less dressy than the laced styles besides the fact they are getting played out. I own slip on shoes and I do like them. It is true that some suit jackets can double as a sport coat. I would suggest wearing simple styles with nice textures. Loud shoes often scream cheesy and/or make you look like a fool. Sport coats are items that are meant to stand alone and are made with fabrics that are easier to match up with common pants. There are a ton of different fabrics for sport coats and the more you shop the more you will discover. Lately it is big to wear a sport coat with a hoodie under it and I think it looks pretty sharp. As far as the style of the shoe. When dressing professional. Real men “peacock” shoes with class and sedulity.The Best of TSBMAG. This is almost the same principle that I talked about earlier with the sport coat fabrics. Just go to any store and walk around touching the fabrics in the suits section and then go over to the sport coats and see the difference for yourself.COM different than the jacket that comes with a suit.

make it a nice phat one.Social Superstar sport coat.Their designs are unique and dressy at the same time. Since most of these pants will need to be tailored. Fabrics… I can’t say it enough. This big cuff reminds me a 211 . My personal favorite. When being casual the rules change and the power shifts to other items of your wardrobe. if not grow up! Touch the clothes as you look through them. Pants and Slacks Fabrics. this allows you another opportunity to add a little “peacock” to it. those pants look comfortable!” I would also recommend staying away from pleated designs. If you are going to go with a cuff in the pants. If you are wearing a nice pair of pants that feel great from the material. So let’s talk button downs… There are many different styles and brands of button down shirts but in general I feel most of them look the same and will get you thrown into the mix with the other cookie cutter button down styles. you will be surprised. I have plenty of unique “no name” button downs that are probably my strongest items and they were purchased at stores like Marshalls and Kohl’s. Fabrics. feel the difference. “Wow. Shirts In the previous section I mentioned to keep you shirts as solids and use the tie and other accessories to accomplish your James Bond “peacock” style. I mention Ben Sherman because I like their stuff. Being able to pick out unique styles is a skill you hone over time and mixing your wardrobe up like this will keep you from being pinpointed as a “BRAND” whore. Stick with a nice smooth looking nice feeling choice. they are too old man-ish and hard to keep pressed. When buying these types of shirts I almost always go with a designer and/or stick to a few. Ben Sherman…. women will notice and they will probably touch you just because of it. Take some chances with it. I am going to focus on pea cocking other items I may have told you to tone down in the above section. If you are a magician then you can wear pants with flames and naked girls. say 1 ½ inches give or take with your height.

Game On! 212 .COM little of that gangster look from the days of Tommy Gun. I am sure that I may have missed some things or not fully answered your questions so please leave any in the comments below.The Best of TSBMAG. I think its bad ass… In closing: I hope you have really enjoyed this series and especially this last installment which I worked pretty hard on.

there should probably be a more fair way of choosing… but the reality is… the early bird gets the worm. all walking around like clueless tourists… And then you’ll walk into your closet sized dorm room… And your nerdy ass roommate will have already jam packed his stuff into the limited closet space… and even worse… he’ll have claimed the better bed. posters. there are drawbacks to both: Downsides to the bottom bunk: 213 . you’ll probably want to spend your last day in your hometown boozing it up with your high school buddies into the wee hours of the night…. computers… You’ll get to campus around two. TV. Most people will generally jump at the lower bunk… (I was one of the late hung-over fools who got the top bunk) But in reality.Social Superstar Winning the Day 1 College Roommate War Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/28/2008 It’s all fair in war… and that is exactly what move in day at the dorms is. it may sound cruel… sure. when it comes to move in day… You need to beat your roommate to the punch. covering the walls with your Pink Floyd and Bob Marley posters… just know… he would do the same thing to you in an instant. Mom and dad will wake you up at noon or so… hung over you’ll start loading the cars up with your microwave. Yes. No matter how big of a dick you feel for claiming the best bed. Sure. Son. If you walk in and find that there are bunk beds… you have instant decision to make. most closet space. fight the traffic and commotion of another thousand underclassmen pushing shopping carts full of their shit.

they’ll crawl into the bottom bunk because the top is too high. Every time you wake up to piss in the middle of the night you’ve got to climb down half asleep.COM • • • • • You clunk you head on the supports under the top bunk if you sit up too quickly. Basically. Downsides to the top bunk: • • • • You need to be able to climb in the dark. When your roommate climbs down from the top he’ll probably wind up stepping on your head out of spite. and mooch off his big screen TV and 27 inch computer monitor… Always fill the room with as much of your shit as possible. and computers… As tempting as it sounds to let him haul all his stuff to the dorms. People will always be sitting on your bed when they come in your room. you’re liable to roll off the bed in shitfaced confusion. he wants to watch the Mets… it’s 214 . For instance. As much as you will both try to pretend everything is equal… the guy who owns it unconsciously has final say over how it’s used. you want to watch the Yankee game. Even with the downsides of the bottom bunk… always choose it.The Best of TSBMAG. entertainment. If you’re a raging drunk. If the guy above you is a raging drunk… there is a good chance after a night of hard partying you're likely to get an unwanted golden shower. As for appliances. If someone is drunk and lost… and your room is open. anytime you’re in bed. Chances are you’re roommate will have wanted it… This gives you a great bargaining tool later. and want something. you’ve got to climb your ass down and get it.

How to be sure you beat him to the room First. chances are you’ll speak on the phone a week or two before move in day to discuss what both of you are bringing. taking first crack at the hotties on your floor. guzzle the Red Bull. The minute the alarm clock goes off. So the sooner you finish the move in bullshit… the sooner you can begin to conquer your campus. you’re free to decorate the room as you please. and to do a formal introduction to each other. you’ll have all your shit packed and ready to go the night before. and more importantly. while you’re watching Jeter and company on your big screen. Getting there early provides several benefits… you’ll get better parking and fight less of a crowd getting to your dorm. It is crucial during this conversation that you bluff. If he doesn’t have any. you’ll get the better bed. This simple line will give him a false sense of security. Remember the first week of college is crucial for establishing yourself as the party guy…. The last thing you want is some dweeb hanging pictures his parents brought him back from their last trip to Key West. He will feel like he’s got all the time in the world to mosey down to campus. In the meantime. These are not things you want to negotiate. Set you alarm clock for 7am and have 2 cans of Red Bull waiting by the bed. hop in the shower. If you’ve got a lot of posters… bring them all. you have all the time in the world to socialize later.Social Superstar your TV… he’ll be checking scores on the internet. 215 . You tell him that you’ll be getting back late from a trip that afternoon and probably won’t make it to campus until later in the evening. and amaze your parents at how energetic and excited you are to get to campus.

even by Bobby Rio standards. and we are shouting derogatory things at him while harassing him physically. Force him into woman’s clothing and throw him in the back of a van. and the rest is history. The bachelor party was the one of the craziest experiences I’ve ever seen. Needless to say we were both ecstatic when we get a call from John’s cousin the first night down there informing us that his bachelor party was tonight. this is an all time low. Two years ago a college friend of mine. He had lived there the past 4 years. John is blindfolded and mouth duck taped. and then rip it 216 . so I didn’t necessarily mind having her tag along on this trip. had been with his girl close to two years and was miserable that he wouldn’t be able to tag some new Spanish ass. Argentina. But what’s done is done…. We had both been to South America enough times to know not to bring sand to the beach. Jake. At one point they put duct tape over John’s hairy nipples. Jake. His Spanish friends were downright cruel. kidnap John from his apartment. I mean. and I. Out of all our friends. A bunch of John’s Spanish friends. and whatever bottle of hard liquor that is currently being passed around. he fell in love with an Argentinean girl. He invited a bunch of us to the wedding.The Best of TSBMAG. John. The entire drive in the van we are guzzling beers. wine. I was still within the first 3 months with Kate. my girl. I could write an entire post on the bachelor party alone. only my friend Jake and I decided to go. but the both of us were in the thick of relationships and our girls jumped at the chance to have a romantic getaway in Buenos Aires. had no choice but to go along with it. We had arrived just in time!! The girls. on the other hand. but the party isn’t the point of the story so I’ll sum it up quickly.COM The Buenos Aires Hooker Juice Incident Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/28/2007 I want to prelude this story by saying that this one of those stories that makes me question my own moral character. was getting married in Buenos Aires. and although he had planned to move back to the US. although not happy to be spending their first night in Argentina alone.

The next couple days of the trip are quite civil. Our plan is to just meet them for lunch or something. We take the numbers and leave. I’ve never seen so many trannies in my life.” he says. (The beauty of 3rd world laws) This part of the story climaxed when we arrive in a park that was filled with Transsexual prostitutes. So I agree to hang out with the strippers. leaving him to be ravaged by Planet of the Shemales. They gave me the address. then the titty bar. and after some back and forth conversation in Spanish that I couldn’t understand.” 217 . Jake and I had other plans. then we loaded him into the van and headed to the strip bar. Then they open up the back of the van and make John (still in women’s clothing) run behind the van tied to a leash. “Just for kicks. But I’m a good friend. but give us their numbers and make us promise to call them this week.Social Superstar off. and am in no rush to go sneaking around with strippers. We let him sweat it out for about a half hour. Unfortunately most of John’s friends were married and were more excited about the kidnapping part of the night. let them grope us. and getting dragged to every clothing store in the city so that our girls can take advantage of 3rd world bargains. on what was supposed to be a romantic getaway with my girlfriend. but “what the hell. just flirt a little bit. Jake who speaks some Spanish asks them if they want to hang out tonight. We are sitting on a couch with two of the strippers listening to them tell us how much they love our blonde hair and blue eyes (I think that's code for “I love your money”) Anyway. They say they can’t leave the bar till 4. heaven. I am honestly pretty content at this point with Kate. big dinners. All the while the stripper’s phone numbers are just burning a hole in our pockets. and I can see how much Jake needs this. Finally the 4th day into the trip Jake can’t take it anymore… He say’s we have to go meet the strippers. Jake calls the stripper. We take John out of the car and tie him to a fence and pretend to drive away. involving a lot of sightseeing.” Meeting them at their apartment was a little more than I bargained for. wedding preparations. The strip bar was a full frontal festival of beautiful busty Latinas…or as I like to call it. and go home. he turns to me and says “They want us to meet them at their apartment.

a television set. if by stripper you mean prostitute. Jake and I sit and give each other little looks. disappointed. Jake looks at me with a “what the fuck” type of look.. I’m slightly embarrassed by the situation and the fact that a language barrier prevents us from communicating. The Madame tells us to take a seat. I am quite winded by the time we reach the top and barely notice the 2 two middle aged white men that just exited the apartment we were about to enter. I look at Jake. disgusted. We will fuck the whores!!! My fake name is called first. who is grinning like a kid in a candy store. confused. We make up a couple fake names. I’m really not sure how I’m supposed to proceed with the scenario. We muster up the courage and walk in. There is a Madame sitting at a desk. and are trying to gauge the other’s desire to go through with this. I walk toward the desk where the Madame asks me for $35. Jake pulls out his paper with the phone numbers. We stand outside the building giggling nervously like a couple of giddy teenagers..The Best of TSBMAG. comes out of a room and hand signals me to follow her. It is immediately clear upon entering the apartment that we have just entered a classic South American Brothel. I just shrug. After a minute of stern deliberation it is settled. Her body’s alright. We are both in shock. and reads two names. who asks us our names when we enter. She is drenched in hooker perfume (presumably to cover up the smell of her previous appointment) 218 . except for a really nasty c-section scar. roughly $40. We have to walk up 8 floors of stairs to get to their apartment. (Yes $35…And our girlfriends thought they were getting bargains in the malls) I hand her about 100 pesos. and don’t seem to mind our departure. I feel a little… I don’t want to say sleazy… you know… just a little creped out… but she’s wearing only a robe and I keep hearing my dick say “follow her boy… faster…damnit!!!” A minute later I’m in a dingy little room filled with a small bed. A cab drops us off in front of a large brick building. and wait for my change.COM We make up some excuse about going to meet John for one last guys only luncheon. and a night stand. She asks us who we are here to see. The girls look at this as an opportunity to go on a shopping binge without us. My prostitute’s face is a little less pretty than I remember. My stripper.

” I attempt to smell myself several times. My performance is adequate. borrow clothes. I am probably the first guy under forty she’s fucked all day. if not stellar. and hope Kate doesn’t notice I’m wearing a different outfit. I feel extremely dirty. I get out of the bed and begin putting my clothes on. 219 .. “This ain’t fucking funny man. I back away. After briefing one another on the gory details of the last hour. shower. “I need a shower badly. down the staircase… out the door… and smack into the cold light of day. Buy some cologne and drench myself in enough of it to override hooker scent.. She wants to cuddle… We lay there with about twenty minutes to kill. I am no longer turned on. But oddly. She tries to kiss me on the lips. Deny and play dumb. Her perfume is giving me a headache so I have my face buried in the pillow. I think she is telling me she loves me.Social Superstar She is smiling and rubbing her titties under the robe.. We both hurry out of there… through the halls. He gives me a nod. 2. “ We go through my options: 1.” “You need to burn those clothes. Now that I’ve cum she looks even less pretty and the c-section scar looks even uglier and nastier. Show up smelling like a whore. 3. She is happy. And he wins. She is running her hands through my hair and licking my ear. Jake starts sniffing me. you fucking reek of hooker perfume” “Fuck! That bitch was drenched in the shit. She takes my hand and puts it on her breast. Jake meets me in the lobby a few minutes later.. I can’t show up at our hotel smelling like a whore.. My prostitute is whispering something in Spanish. too” Jake is laughing. He moves forward and smells me again. my dick is quite hard. I may throw up. I try to gesture that I have a headache. I want to get the fuck out of there… but I don’t want to sit in the lobby waiting for Jake.. Call John see if I can go to his place. She just keeps trying to tongue me. “Dude.

but it's too late. John’s fiancé answers the door. face. I try to hide my stench behind Jake. She almost chokes. No one wants to ask me why I smell like I’ve taken a bath in cheap perfume.The Best of TSBMAG. I point back at Jake. He smells his wife (like she might be the one drenched in whore juice) John then walks out of the bathroom and immediately blurts out “What's that smell?” Jake points at me. I shout “can I come over for a minute” into the phone. I start to put my clothes back on and realize that it would be defeating the purpose of washing if I put the smelly clothes back on. Everyone in the apartment is completely uncomfortable with the situation. Her mother comes over and kisses me on the cheek. She grabs my hand and leads me toward them.. She introduces us as “John’s amigos de Estados Unidos”. I am stunned. We jump out of the cab and ring John’s bell repeatedly. She wants to introduce us to them. I lean out the door and call for John. We need to take care of this as fast as possible as the girl’s are surely beginning to wonder what's taking us so long. “You guys went to meet those strippers didn’t you?” “I’ll explain later… can you please get me some clothes to wear?” “Yea… but you’re bigger than me. I try to wave to avoid a handshaking and kiss.. neck… fuck it. Her father gets a whiff of the smell and starts sniffing suspiciously. Once we get in we notice that not only is Mariella. I am now completely naked scrubbing myself with a sponge that was in his shower. My mind is blank for an excuse as to why I smell like whore.” “I don’t fucking care… “ 220 . I take off my shirt and start washing my chest and stomach. She motions for us to come in. Once I get in the bathroom I start washing my hands. I try to explain my situation but the reception is horrible. We’re buzzed in and quickly rush up three flights of stairs. I can only imagine the conversation that is taking place outside the door.COM I call John from a pay phone. They’re going to be a little tight. John comes to the door. I reluctantly enter. his fiancé there… but so is Mariella’s mother and father. I ask John if I can use the bathroom. He shouts “Sure” Jake and I take a cab to John’s apartment.

The shirt is not bad. I thank John for the clothes and grab Jake and we bounce. She is lying in bed… relaxing after a hard day shopping. I am afraid I might blurt something stupid out. I feel too guilty to speak. She is happy to see me. She believes my story. and in an effort to avoid any more embarrassing conversation I quickly announce that we have to meet our girlfriends back at the hotel. So I just go along with it. 221 . Kate is waiting for me. Then she notices the clothes I am wearing. But the jeans make me look like an 80’s rocker. I exit the bathroom. I hesitantly enter my room. She starts nibbling my ear. I make up an excuse about spilling spaghetti sauce all over myself at lunch… had to go to John’s to change. Mariella and her parents are still in total shock and barely acknowledge me when I wave goodbye. Just my luck… she’s horny. Not in the mood… but apparently my tight eighties rocker jeans are turning her on. She gives me the “fuck me eyes” I try to tell her that I’m tired. She pulls off me for a second. We finally get back to the hotel. They are a quite tight on me.Social Superstar I put on Johns clothes. “Are you wearing perfume?” she asks.

The kind of guy. A street kid puts out his hand for coins as he passes you by. who wakes up early and takes a jog on the beach. You are still riding the adrenaline rush of last night’s Red Bull and Cialis fueled comet trail of adventure. a vaguely tribal feel. well-reviewed. “No tengo nada” you lie. You used phrases like “Nice and relaxing” “Catching up on work” “Plowing through novels” “Good restaurants "and “often lonely” to describe the trip. sipping a glass of Cabernet.” This morning when you called your mother you felt ashamed. Bits and pieces are forming shapes in your mind as you sip an espresso and watch the girl’s parade down the strip in their short denim skirts. 222 .” so you don’t worry. But Brasileras have no concept of “on time. hiked up for extra effect. “Where you from?”A Brazilian guy is shouting in your ear. novels for this trip. and a liver that still has not forgiven you. which left you with very few clear memories. who on vacation. and a clan of scantily clad Brasileras shaking their stuff on stage to the pulse of the music. maybe plays a game of tennis. you confessed nothing. and then hits up a local museum. Now that you’ve made your token phone calls you feel like you have just been to Confession at church. or was it Europa? You were already pretty tight when you arrived. You hang up the phone and pay the fifteen Reas for the call.COM Fortaleza ights Part 1 Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 11/14/2007 You bought three new. has fruit for breakfast. No sign of the blonde and her friend that you were supposed to meet. reads Hemingway at a table outside a café along the water. He curses you out in Portuguese.The Best of TSBMAG. Your night began at Amozoa. and make your way to the bar to grab a Bohemia and take in the view. You’ve always envisioned yourself as the kind of guy. You were here two years ago but that trip was during your “Black Label” phase. Yet. Your highly acclaimed novels are still buried beneath dirty clothes in your suitcase. You entered to pounding bongo drums. You don’t know at exactly what point you deviated from your “ideal self.

A petite light skinned Brasilera giggles.” You walk back to the bar and order your first of the night. What you like?” “No necassario. All could have been avoided if you had only jerked off when the desire arose earlier in the day. You feel a hand graze you butt. and you wonder if they could be transvestites. even when they’re speaking English. You grab her ass like you own it.” you scream back.Social Superstar You wonder if you have the word “gringo” tattooed on your forehead. You were quite enjoying your own blurred thoughts and not quite enticed by the idea of engaging conversation with a guy who obviously wants something from you. You run your hand from her ass up the curves of her abdomen.” You check your watch. Maybe a Red Bull will help you “man up. He calls over probably the only two ugly girls in the club. it is certain that they are prostitutes. But your “well raised” childhood taught you to never be rude. “You like Coca. Thinking it might be a pick pocket you swat it away. Marijuana?” “Only chicas” you say. It’s not like you don’t have options. “I’ll find you a good one. For some reason you always feel compelled to speak your broken Portuguese. The girl/guy things are giving you “fuck me” eyes and while their gender is not clear. You’re not sure if you welcome company at this time. But jerking off in Brazil seemed like an Oxymoron. when you near her breast she grabs your hand and places it back on her ass. You wonder if maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if the blonde doesn’t show up. 223 . They both have penciled in eye brows and slicked back jet black hair.” you tell him. You decide to do a lap and see if your blonde and friend have arrived. “Estados Unidos. “You like?” he asks you. You twirl her around and do a once over. She shakes her finger “no” but her smile lets you know it okay to continue. As you crack open your second Bohemia you wonder if you have the energy to go through with the night. and visions of “the blonde” naked were like piranhas gnawing on your brain. You politely thank their pimp but tell him “I already have a chica. The guy seems genuinely pleased with himself. You turn to the girl and go Cave Man on her.

never raise a family. never do Disney vacations. Brasileras aren’t shy about pointing that sort of thing out. They’ll come. The boom. When you come out of the stall you wish you had given it an extra couple of shakes as you notice a nice wet spot near your crotch. She points to your eyes and tells you they’re beautiful. The self. It was only yesterday you were busting through language barriers on basis of charm. tell her “it was a pleasure” and make your way through the crowd. the Asian looking ones with sinister eyes. The one that can keep a girl laughing when she has no clue what you’re saying. Fucking “gringos” in their Brasilia Soccer jerseys. rolled with the punches… And won her over with impersonations of “stupid Americanos” holding your imaginary map. You’re about to head back into that bathroom to dry off when you spot the blonde and her friend on the dance floor surrounded by guys. It comes in all forms. Back to the bar. The Red Bull rush has begun. the crazy.boom shaking mulattas. 224 . A situation like this might normally unravel your nerves. Presenting your best self. too many girls… too little time. the one with the shaved head. You kiss this one on the cheek. Sex is all around you. the fucked up X heads. the beautiful. the skinny. foreshadowing all of the reasons that you’ll most likely never get married. But first a much need bathroom break. And if they don’t? You look around. Throw you off balance a bit. Sit tight my friend. What do you know? Another Bohemia has bit the dust. you think. Those far away eyes. Curious eyes are set upon you from all directions. You are a fucking Star. you think. that when the friend arrived unexpectedly. pointing at buildings…works every time. the long swanky model types with heartbreaking cheek bones. Your swagger has returned. never have kids. Yes.The Best of TSBMAG. yesterday at lunch.COM “Eu Gusto” you tell her. But not now. the barely clothed “garotas de programma” putting their pussy on display. the sixteen year old debutants. They always do. the black girls with huge hoop earrings commanding the dance floor…the punk rockers. There is something fundamentally perfect about being adored.Does it matter? Then you remember staring into her eyes. the fat.

Social Superstar When you started to sense that the friend might be the type to be persuaded… you upped the ante…divvied up your attention…treated them equally special. guards finally down. 225 . Jose. And when the two of them. You’re not willing to wave the white flag quite yet. No way. ran their fingers through your hair and kept repeating “muito lindo” you saw the potential for something truly spectacular. No.

kicking over a flower pot. The girls could not be happier to see you. you think. ordering the cleaning lady to bring a bottle of Scotch up to your room… Pronto! These sorts of things aren’t acceptable in Hotel Luzieros. You make your Great Gatsby entrance. You slovenly escort the two girls outside. No one sent you the memo. You signal over a cocktail waitress. You’re drunk and go for tongue but both girls resist.The Best of TSBMAG. The whole matter could have easily been resolved with a small bribe. You take the blonde by the hand and immediately remove her 226 . They reluctantly do the shots… looking around to see who the mysterious stranger is that sent them. Just a few hours ago you were in the mist of the single biggest girl heist of your life. Fortaleza’s most well known and luxurious hotel. One voice in your head says “Cut your losses. The group is confused. You order 8 shots of the Brazilian equivalent of Yagermeiser. He points at the door.COM Fortaleza ights Part 2 Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 12/02/2007 The night bellman at your hotel is talking loudly at you in a language you don’t understand. You want to knock that smug look off his Portuguese face. You felt a little intimidated. Nights early. You have the waitress deliver the shots to your girls and their new Norwegian friends. Apparently strolling in at 4am with a couple of barely legal Brasileras is frowned upon at this establishment. Rapido! Por Favor” You would be damned to let the night go up in flames at this point. a girl dangling from each arm.there is always tomorrow. You get the gist of it though. But you blew any chance of that happening with your “American sense of entitlement” and incoherent attack on his character. he is telling you.” A louder voice hails down a cab and says “To the cheapest motel. You rode in like a rock star. Has your Super Americano Power waned? Have your girls been swept away with tales of a booming European economy… You decide to flex your muscles. You get two kisses on the lips. Back at the club you had come out of the bathroom to spot your girls sandwiched in the middle of a group of Norwegians.

Their eyes light up. He is asking you questions. the brunette is eighteen. Outside the street is still tinkered with people. Emelia. You flashback to an incident in Brazil two years prior involving a spotlight. Down the road. Maybe even some life decisions to make. the blonde is twenty. But you don’t want to think about these things right now. The coast is clear for takeoff. Jackpot! After an hour or two of dry humping the two Brasileras and taking turns kissing them you suggest the bounce. They get closer closer closer…They Kiss. Pick up some pieces… From the back seat Emelia lets out a squeal. He could just as easily be saying “You parents will pay the ransom. The long winding road that is Avenida Beira Mar travels the course of the night. You reach your hand in the back and one of the girls begins 227 . You take turns grinding with each girl… you look on in disbelief as the girls grind sexually with each other. Your “gringo sense of rhythm” is usually a game killer but tonight you’re Michael fucking Jackson. The girls drag you on the dance floor. but can never be sure of these things. Brazil is a strange place for sure. You trust that Manny is actually taking you to a motel and not to a guerrilla hide out where you will be kidnapped and tortured. Manny could probably tell you stories that would break your heart.Social Superstar from the group. You smile and nod. You think Manny likes you. You’ll have some contemplating to do when you get home. Rearrange some priorities. And if they don’t we chop you up and feed you to pigs” The girls are too busy to notice. Manny’s hand is on your knee and he is talking loudly and passionately in Portuguese. Make you run back to the States. one hand holding her skirt from riding too far up her ass. You casually ask the girls to see their documents. You look back and feel bad leaving the brunette to the pack of Norwegian wolves. …Toward dawn you are sitting in the front seat of a cab next to Manny the driver. a lone hooker trots on heels. Manny doesn’t blink an eye as you pass her. Raquel. You signal for her to come over. In the back seat Raquel is disappearing inside Emelia’s dress. As your cab gets closer you see that she is topless. a couple machine guns.from the opulent to the destitute. Smile and nod. and a girl who turned out to be sixteen. But you aren’t certain.

When Manny pulls away. you can only wonder what you did in a previous life to reap these fruits in this one.The Best of TSBMAG. Their bodies are twisting and turning into one another. Maybe you can be again… Just not tonight. 228 . that is just about how you feel right now. It wasn’t until college. Sandwiched in between the two warm bodies. They both are both kissing your neck. Looking at the girls. Growing up you always thought the other guys knew some fundamental secret about girls that you didn’t. that you began to feel comfortable around them. These guys seemed to know what they were doing.COM sucking your fingers. You run your hands along the crest of their abdomens. you experience a moment of doubt. leaving you and the girls in front of the motel. They are giggling in a way that reminds you that this is exactly where they want to be. you are reminded that this is exactly where you want to be. Even as you began a long string of conquests you always had the feeling you were just learning what came naturally to others. Emelia gently slides your pants down to your ankles. Raquel is the first to signal you onto the bed. All your doubts are alleviated when Raquel and Emelia fall onto the bed. And even as it finally began to come naturally to you. you still had that underlying fear that you’ll be discovered as a fraud. with the help of alcohol. you were one of the good guys. Yea… once upon a time. You slide into them. And when they quickly undress.

And everyone loves old pussy. because she tells me she’ll be right back.” I park my car outside of her apartment. Jake seems to think I'm going to fuck her. I ran into her about a week ago for the first time in years and gave her my number out of courtesy when she gave me hers. wants to know if I want to meet up for drinks one night this weekend. she calls. and I realize that the day didn't exactly start out with promise. And she took mine (although I don't let too many people know that. She must have caught it. She's 25lbs away from pulling it off. But I should have figured she would call me. that way if it's a bomb. you tell her you're going to take a piss. This means we will be taking one car. I sit in it for a second. As I'm checking my email. she’s drunk. An outfit I don't usually mind on girls who can pull it off. She answers the door dressed in a tight white shirt. I refuse to waste a Friday or Saturday on her. So I had no intention of calling her. She’s ten years older than she was when I dated her. what about tonight. Jillian. I think back to waking up with a huge hangover. a girl I dated for a little over a year. and you take off. about a year before Beth (love of my life till she broke my heart in a million pieces) came around. As much as I hated this girl when I was dating her. and she comes back two minutes later in a different outfit. a skirt. I smile because there is a part of me that kind of knows it's true. Great. I sneer. and totally inappropriate black hooker boots.Social Superstar 10 Years After I Took Her Virginity Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/27/2007 I get the random phone call. I'm going to do everything in my power to convince myself I wasn’t intending to. 229 . I hear my buddy Phil saying. I get home and search my drawers for my least appealing outfit. She wants me to meet her at her apartment. “Always take two cars.) I say. I call Jake on the way home. She's been at happy hour. There goes the quick getaway. Plus she’ll expect less time from me on a week night. and she was no prize then. She always was an annoying drunk. So why should it end with promise. I took her virginity for god sake. If I'm going to fuck this girl. she is old pussy.

I keep nodding my head. She is in the middle of some story about how she got pulled over for no good reason. I get out of the bathroom and this bitch has a crowd of derelicts surrounding her. At that precise minute she puts the dog into her purse and tells me she is taking it with us for drinks. and I have to pet it while she tells me how cute it is.” I say to get her attention. 230 . I tell her. Unfortunately I don’t have that option. I tell her. All egging this stupid cop story on. She tells me the puppy is too scared to stay home alone. She was an old college friend of a friend type girl.” She insists and I don't feel like arguing. Finally I say. There is this little dog that keeps jumping on my leg. She soon realizes that New Jersey. well. have no outdoor places. Luckily her name came back to me right then. And so she was kicked out of the club. and a guy playing pool over hears her. Over the summer she was getting harassed by a bouncer who was claiming her ID was a fake. When the guy asked me.The Best of TSBMAG.” I think. I take this as my cue to excuse myself for a much needed piss break. Plus one her friends had made eye contact with me while I was grabbing a drink at the bar on the way back from the bathroom. I recognized one of the girls. which was good.” She picks the Town Pub. I smile because. So I do the next best thing and guzzle gin and tonics.COM It is awkward in her apartment. This idiot puts this little puppy in her purse. because I don't know many people that go there. “Lauren. He’s a cop and is interested in her story. I just for the life of me couldn’t remember her name. Instead of joining the fun I walked over to the pool table where three girls were about to start playing. does in fact. isn't it?” She says we’ll go to a place outside. Apparently her rambling has put it to sleep. I felt this was a perfect time to apologize for my blunder. “This is going to be a long night. Talking loudly and compulsively about nothing. “that is a problem. We get to the pub and this bitch won’t leave the thing in the car. Nothing I care about anyway. Amazingly the dog is being good. because she's’ crazy. “Just pick a place and leave the fucking dog in the car. “This is New Jersey there are no outside cafes. I was behind her in line and she told him to verify her name with me. I have now been in the car with her for twenty minutes. I wish I could tape record this car ride to play to people to demonstrate the torture I was going through listening to this bitch.

One of the girls grabs the dog and heads for the door. The two remaining girls decide it's a good time to flee. She panics. We exchange numbers. She is absolutely 231 . I twirl my finger by my ear to signify she’s crazy. We are hitting it off nicely. She is crying hysterically. When we walk back to pool table there is tension between Jill and Lauren. We are all kind of making fun of my obnoxious friend and her and her obnoxious stories. I'm standing by Lauren’s SUV. I will go outside to see if the girls have it. I explain my ordeal. Just then Jill comes barreling out the front door. Jill stops in the middle of a sentence to point out that Lauren has been giving her dirty looks. I promise to call. ‘I didn't see nothing look’. All the girls hover around the dog. As Jill is talking to the girls. When she leaves. The girls all laugh. I offer to buy the girls a round. I give a. I paired with Ivana. I just wanted to talk to Ivana some more. I walk back over to Ivana and see if there is any chance of getting her back to my house later. I need another drink. Her face is covered in blood. I tell her. I explain what a dog was doing in her purse. And a bunch of other shit I could care less about. Something I never do. Jill has made her way back to the booth near the pool table. She realizes that the girls are gone now too. but I'm feeling sporty. She has an accent. she is preoccupied with the derelicts anyway. Ivana and I say a nice goodbye. It starts freaking out. Jill comes over to me and explains how Lauren just hates her for fucking her ex boyfriend. She starts scurrying around. the puppy wakes up. I should have never left because when I come back Jill is by the pool table telling the girls how we were each other's firsts. and decide to take it. and proceed to defend myself for ever having dated this idiot. The cute one who was eying me. She glances at the bag and realizes that there is no dog in there. She looks under the table. Only she is crazy. She is screaming that the girls stole her dog. Meanwhile Jill has lost it completely. I tell Jill to go to the bathroom and cool down for a minute. I feel queasy. Everyone in the place is staring at her like she's crazy. I walk her away from the crowd.Social Superstar She’s a friendly girl and within minutes I'm the fourth player on a two on two pool game. The three girls are in it with the puppy. We chat for a few. I call Ivana over to me. I tell them they should probably give it back. She's from Denmark or France or something. And apparently is scared of pubs. They feel my pain. I figure Jill won’t mind. They decide that Jill is unfit to raise this dog.

waiting for us to use up the half hour we were allowed to be in there. I ask the bouncer if he's going to break it up. He then searches the truck for the dog. I teach her how to ski and she picks it up quickly and soon she is beating me down the mountain. Looking so cute as she keeps falling into the snow. I give her another little hug.COM hysterical. They are both punching each other violently. I tell her I have work early. A bouncer calls me over and asks me what happened. Later in the night we make love in the outdoor hot tub with a couple watching." She says it's really fucked up for me to just leave her like this. I can. Finally the bouncer runs over and breaks it up. She runs over to the SUV and starts screaming at the girls. heartless dick I am. feeling a little guilty for letting it happen. I shrug. He takes it from the truck and hands it to Jill. I agree.The Best of TSBMAG. Her all bundled up. My head hits the pillow and I wonder if this is really what my life has come to. She's in the emergency room and just wants to tell me what a complete and utter selfish. I kind of pat her on the back. I push her off and start to walk away.” he says. but I have to go. She doesn't remember. Maybe she ran into a wall in all the confusion. I ask her how it happened. "it's been a fun night. She says she can't believe I'm leaving. She was bleeding when she came out of the pub. When our half hour was up we just keep making love until someone from the front desk has to come in and tell us to leave. 232 . I got to get as far away from this psychopath as possible. “Not till a titty pops out. We are outside Jill’s apartment and I'm trying to calm her down. and tell her. Jill is crying and bleeding and hugging the dog. I really can be a dick. Her lip is still bleeding pretty badly. That night I dream of Beth and being up in Killington with her. I suggest we leave. We look over at the car where Jill has pulled Lauren out. give her a little hug. She gets blood on me. He wants to know if they really have her dog. I'm awakened from my dream the next morning with a phone call from Jill. before the fight. And so begins another fine morning.

” Jale again. “What the fuck is it?” Brian is asking us after a third Friday in a row sitting on floor in the living room drunk watching Napoleon Dynamite at 3 in the morning. we all basically start blowing off the girls we were dating. We were still without couches for our living room and we were hot tub shopping. “We are wasting this house. Yep.” Brian says. girls would just naturally come. Probably because we lived in such shit throughout college. guarantee we'd be more appreciated there.” Jake proclaims “Shut up with that. naked chicken fighting. my roommates and I have over glorified this house. “Maybe the house isn't as impressive as we think.” The first month we have the house. It would have been sweet. we go to New York. We should have it packed right now with girls flipping coins seeing who gets to fuck us next. “Did she see the house?” or “What did she say when she walked in?” Like because we had a house (only slightly nicer than a frat house mind you) girls were going to just fuck us. But he's got a nice house.Social Superstar My First Piece of MySpace Pussy Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/20/2007 We've always had delusions of grandeur in regards to the house we our renting. it's the bars we go to.” I'm blunt but. Still have visions of girls sitting on our shoulders. Young new pussy is what this house is all about. An outdoor one. and shit like that. “I'm telling you. 233 . “Bobby's old and kind of sleazy. Sort of like Field of Dreams. A common line. We also always imagined that because we had the house now. Without women.” I tell them. Like they're going. So we were naturally perplexed when a couple weeks had gone by and none of us were yet to christen our new place with a new girl. so I'll fuck him anyway. and his teeth are really yellow. I'm in no mood for excuses. getting ready for the onslaught of young new pussy that was awaiting us. “I'm telling you.

Tell everyone about your 2 week long drought.COM “Don't do it. 234 . Apparently they see the irony. the pleasure of not knowing what the next girl you'll fuck looks like. “You might be on to something I finally admit. Without paying. The one thing that keeps me single. “Get on the phone. On one hand she is an old standby. boys?” That Monday I woke up in the morning. stop.” Brian threatens me with what he knows it my worst fear.” Jake says. You know what grown men share a house at thirty? Crack heads. We're almost thirty. I lie in bed. Without calling one of my old stand bys. do your magic.” “You're crushing it. I got pretty excited imagining what she was going to look like. “I don't know man. and I swore Id fuck something new tonight.The Best of TSBMAG.” Jake with hands over ears. I try to defend myself. No. it would be a completely new chick. “I don't see condom wrappers in either of your trash cans. “Give it time. Crack heads and gay men. My first thought was to call Tammy and break the rule a little bit. Don't crush my dreams daddy.I am just fucking horny and have to be realistic.” “I'm going to out you on the internet. Are we the neighborhood homos.” Me still optimistic. now clearly enjoying the opportunity to rip. Of course there was the slight crick in the plan being that it's a completely dead Monday bar night and we don't have any leads to work with from the weekend. “Bobby Rio having trouble getting laid?” They laugh. In this house. Recollect on the weekend. I announce my dilemma to my roommates as we were all preparing for work. Having a reputation to live up to can be a pain in the fucking ass sometimes. Take a quick piss and decided I was getting laid tonight. But on the other hand.” Jake says.

” I say this. “You joke now. I headed home to regroup. but still kind of considered it creepy to be contacting girls online. And I'm getting you two pricks laid too. I am sitting on my computer. I figured I just start humming one of her favorite songs. if she could stay out past her curfew.Social Superstar “I could be fucking Tammy any day this week plenty of other girls too. But tomorrow morning. I also quickly found that my off beat sense of humor didn't translate well in emails. but it is the first Monday of the month.” I am saying this wondering how the hell I am going to deal with them tomorrow morning when we all wake up alone. I'm getting laid tonight. maybe casually mention how much I love Lost or whatever other stupid show she has 235 . she had two bratty kids that would have posed a problem in closing the deal quickly. As the details of conversation become less blurry I decide I better get the hell out of there before she recognizes me. browsing profiles on MySpace. but I have a vague recollection of a past conversation that didn't go so well. These two dicks. I await the abuse. I could bring Keira Knightly home and fuck her on the kitchen table and they still wouldn't be impressed. and know it is a weak comeback. Although I was fairly confident I could have taken home this Mexican women that kept giving me the eye. I looked at it like I was acquiring ammunition in case I ever ran into one of these girls in a bar. I try to think where I can go on a Monday morning to meet some women. I hang out in Shop Right for a bit. There is a cute girl behind the counter serving coffee. and it is full of people cashing in their food stamps. I still managed to waste hours browsing profiles. on school nights?” Brian says. I head to Barnes and Noble. I had put a profile up a month or two ago. you'll both be thanking Bobby. Bobby. Not much talent here this morning though. I call out of work. “I think I saw her hanging out in front of 7-11 the other night.” “Work you're magic.” Jake inputs. I always hear stories of successful book store pickups. What time is it again. “That's it. “Yea.

So I am a bit surprised when I see that it's a girl called "Everything I thought you know" that has messaged me. About me: Well. And write me a brief essay on why you deserve to be Bobby's Miss Wednesday Night. male. "Pick me!" And so we have a winner. Or how I met them. but in that sloppy goodness sort of way. I wrote her back. contact me and I'll show you. Perfect. that smart. Only three. I start believing the hype. about me. She is only eighteen. I am currently taking applications for Wednesday nights. if I'd have to do a newspaper singles ad it word read something like this. I have posted it in its entirety. Slightly chubby. shed have to fuck me right? Fate. Single white. I am the man. hung like a -use your imagination. open minded women. But as I'm looking at her picture my dick is getting hard so it's settled. A tad larger than I would prefer. I'm sure you're reading this and wondering. and decide that she is. So send at least four pictures. might explain it. My about me and who I'd like to meet. I mean it would be fate. Or better yet. Adorable face. I very rarely got messages on MySpace. I am sad to report. and heroes. I click on her profile page to check her out more. I have posted the email in its entirety. Picture Tara Reid twenty five pounds heavier. not in fact. I enlarge them and get set to analyze. View more pictures. Then the thought hits me. No clear body shots. Who I'd like to meet: Adventurous. An exposed left arm kind of scares me. and I'd be golden. Blonde. Now. Two of the pictures have to be body shots.COM listed under TV. a plus! I did not receive many applications.The Best of TSBMAG. 236 . She'll do. I read her interests. I think as my home screen reads new messages. My spare time consists of trying to find ways to sneak strange women out of my room before they realize that I don't know their name. I read the email. how can I be one of those lucky ladies? Well it's your special day. I am the mother fucking man. spontaneous. Brazilian or Asian. I go back to her profile page. For a moment I feel special.women. A lovely word. what if she is smart enough to be displaying sarcasm.

music. When my roommates get home I tell them the news. IM me at Bobbyrio03 on AOL. If you would seriously like to be considered for the role. I will not post it in its entirety. a deck of cards. A bit of information I skipped over in the subject matter. I'm actually trying to get him to write a book on the subject. I leave out the small detail above. 237 . Now I've heard of online success stories. I'd say half the time he fucks them the first night. and in an effort to save space. food (so that fat one doesn't drag them out to McDonalds before things get going) condoms. They are both very happy. and she will have to bring someone else. Until now. If I hear from you we'll take it further. Boring small talk More boring small talk How hot I am What kind of piercing she has What kind of tattoos she has What she's doing tonight Does she have 2 friends Are they hot Me looking at friends MySpace profiles Again. He pulls 3 or 4 girls a week off MySpace and Match. and that's about it. We will need: Beer. Me telling her that one of her friends was too fat for my roommates. So I know it is possible. We plan the night. Exactly three hours later she contacts me.Social Superstar I will be at my computer for the next three hours. I hesitantly agree. She tells me that these two girls are the only ones that would be willing to come tonight. I have a friend Michael that cleans up online. if you're thinking that sounded too easy. I just never had a need to bother with it. laughing inside at the thought of which of roommates would wind up with the fat one. The beauty of eighteen year olds is that they are extremely easy to impress. everything will be explained later. Instead I will break it down into subjects. It was an extremely long conversation. what she's doing tonight Her looking at my roommates MySpace profiles Her telling me how hot they are Us making plans for tonight Now.

The Best of TSBMAG. I decide the jacket should stay on until I put a few beers down. I know what that jacket hides. I assume the role of gracious host. Below is straight out of Bobby Rios playbook for banging girls under twenty. And Kristen (shit smeller). There is Aimee (gothic horse). There is Katie (horse). The horses are keeping up. gothic horse is downright repulsive. By 9:30 we've become restless. I am breaking a pact that we made that night. It will not be pretty later. one bigger than the next. We continually check the blinds to make sure no one can see in. My roommates look at me in shock. The horses love us immediately. And so it's on. We learn a whole bunch of irrelevant information about these girls. We will fuck them anyway. I cringe. The doors are locked. And the drinking begins. We are all thoroughly disappointed. ha ha ha ha. It must be done exactly in this order. thinking about which one of my roommates will fuck her tonight. That's what you fucks get for not respecting my authority. we swear to each other while the horses take a piss together. Take notes! Casual drinking Speed up the drinking with flip cup Pair off and speed up drinking even more with beer pong When sufficiently drunk suggest the game. She tells me it's cold. I take their jackets. I once again laugh. I shrug. While my horse is no prize. There is an instant decision to be made. No one will ever know until I tell the world about it boys. Around 10PM we decide it is time to take this to the next level. We are all sitting at the dining room table.COM 8:30 PM The piggies arrive. The speed at which we are putting beers down at 8:45 on a Monday is frightening. They are fat. There is nothing gratifying about winning the affection of a horse. the lights are dimmed. The message has been sent. They stampede in. Only my girl will not release it. Never have I ever Begin sexual talk 238 . We turn our cell phones off. No one will ever know about this. We seem like great guys. The three of us are communicating solely with eye glances. We do the introductions. We pretend to be interested.

He wins the argument. Her hand makes its way down my pants. I fuck the shit out of her. I throw a pair of boxers at her to clean up with. and I roll over and go to sleep. I mean if you're going to do it you may as well enjoy it. In this light. I shrug and mumble something about drinking too much. We wonder if she is going to swallow him. I eat her pussy. And so the house finally got us laid. It is all just practice for the big game. I brush the hair out of her eyes. I hope you never have to do what I am about to do. In the morning we hurry the horses out. she has cuteness to her. Instead I continually point out to him how her nostrils are snared.” she whispers. the skinniest of the crew. it is much easier to do the smooth transition with girls over a buck fifty. “You have amazing eyes. I let this fat pig ride me. We sit and brag about the poundings we gave them. I do her doggy.Social Superstar Top the night off with Truth or Dare Get Laid Yes. I don't admit this. “Show me your room. And I had my first of many MySpace escapades. We pair off.” I tell her. Jake is with shit smeller. Oh. we rationalize. I am a little jealous. There is no thrill of victory with fat girls. I am alone in the kitchen with horse now. “You have an amazing smile. Then I blow my load all over her big fat titties. We both win the battle as we watch Brian make out of with Gothic Horse. lick my dick like it's an ice cream cone. or that many beers.” she tells me. yea. 239 . He seems happy. I tell her how sexy she is. Kids. He continually reminds me that my horse hasn't seen her hooves since the third grade. The kiss is oddly passionate. But trust me. She looks perplexed. it works on real girls too. We kiss.

The Best of TSBMAG. 12:51 pm Gloria answers. He tells me he thinks one of the hookers out there gave him the clap. They will take it as an opportunity to spend the next two hours spilling their guts about a life gone by. I contemplate putting in a few hours at the office. Don't call so soon. I can hear the people out there saying. He is finally back from Vegas. I call Gloria. An indicator that she already put my number in her phone. Here is some advice. I hang up the phone and smile.COM Return of a Pick-Up Artist (Part 2) Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/09/2008 11:45 am The day began with a Powerbar. 1:15 pm I call Phil. I make a friend with a guy next to me. Now he wants to tell stories. We chat for a few minutes. It is a great movie. I quickly scratch that idea. Yes. never show even the slightest sign of interest with old people. but if you wait six days to call a girl after you get her number chances are she forgot you. She knew it was me. vitamins. He is almost 70. buddy. 12:30 pm I am not the only one in the bar. He is approximately the 600th old man in a bar who tells me not to get married. These people have watched Swingers too many times. I tell him he should give it to 240 . 12:50 pm I decide that I do not want to spend my Memorial Day weekend with the kind of people who drink alone at the town pub. Apparently there are other people who use Memorial Day weekend as a way to justify drinking in the afternoon. water and a cool shower. I am afraid that these old men have subliminally installed that in my brain. The truth is when you get good at this shit you start writing your own rules. I wonder how she is going to be in bed later. I throw a pair of jeans on and head to The Saloon for a beer. But you only got her number last night Bobby.

Social Superstar Penelope. maybe even fuck her in the woods. Here is a hint. I test her out and see if I can elevate it even further. dinner. 2:30 pm I pick up Gloria. The older the girls the more willing she is too elevate the conversation. what celebrities we'd like to screw and just when I sense the conversation has gotten too racy I bring it back to PG. the first guy she kissed. when we lost our virginity. She has been on that date a hundred times with a hundred guys. pop culture gossip and just when the conversation hits a lull I throw out things like: coworkers who fuck. I had put quite a few down at Bob's party and was a little scared I might get a surprise when she answered the door. Younger girls tend to be more naive when it comes to talking about this kind of 241 . Gloria is taking the ride with me up to Warren to help me assess Phil's uncle's land. Then I steer it back to neutral topics: work. I get directions for some land up in Warren County that he wants me to do an appraisal on. Maybe even thirty. family. Here is another hint. Who knows. Tell her you brought her a gift back. Every time I bring it back to R. friends. you’ll have to be a little more creative. drinks route. Soon she is describing the first time she gave a guy road head. Each time I test her she bites and brings the conversation even racier. She's got long wavy brown hair. I started seeing this conversation going in a very good direction. It's sexy though. unless she's a complete slut. if you want to fuck her the first night. I did not fret. She had a little bit of the hippy chick thing going on and I thought this would be a good way to get her juices flowing. Just kind of has that natural no make-up kind of beauty. 3:35 pm I have been doing a good job juggling the conversation between PG and R. No. Unfortunately we were about a minute from the land. There is a slight hint of age twinkling in her eyes. For your first date with a girl don’t go the standard coffee. if I blew my load this early the rest of the day would be a waste. She's got to be in her late twenties. 3:00 pm I have been in the car with her for thirty minutes and I have to say it's been a pretty pleasant experience. But she is actually even hotter than I imagined. Every time I guide the conversation to edgier topics she bites right away.

I wonder if there is an abandoned bed in photo shoot. That way all these boring pictures of barren land will have something interesting to look at. There is a tiny lake. but ultimately decided against it. I had her posing all over the place in all kinds of positions. I walk around taking pictures. but she said it with the slightest hint of sarcasm. They are just as horny as you are. 4:15 pm A pack of wild sheep stroll in from the field in the back of the property. So instead of giving up when I saw the bars over the door. “Oh look how cute and professional you look. Here is a hint. There is a small abandoned barn looking house. Boards are over a door. There was a bed but it was decrepit looking and I'd have preferred the floor. It took a few times and knocked quite a bit of wind out of me. Rising higher lower.” Which was actually the look I was going for. but we got in that house/barn. I contemplated going for a naturalgirls. The look in Gloria's eyes when we see the sheep let me know that the juices are officially flowing. I told her to pose. 242 . Hands were getting left places longer. I don't mean be a meathead. I pulled out the camera. and have very little tolerance for banal talk. you just have to do those certain things women like to see men do. Use random opportunities like this to display some alpha male characteristics. I was not shy about touching her but now the touching was turning flirty. All the signs of an adventurous afternoon were there. although this is only to make this trip seem a little more important. Displaying raw power. Some girls just get so damn turned on by nature. She sees through my bullshit and calls me out again. I start snapping some pictures of them. 4:00 pm Phil's uncle's land is pretty barren. I put my clip board down. actually. I made it a point to bust the fucking door in. There are only a handful of trees scattered around. As cool as she seems. There will be a time for that later. This early in the day I was not going to take that chance. The Kino has begun. Like I'm a real professional under my bad boy exterior.The Best of TSBMAG. The older ones eat this shit up.COM stuff. suggesting something like that could freak a girl out if the rapport isn’t as strong as you imagined. She suggests that we check out the inside of the barn/house. Caveman type shit. All day hands were always brushing against each other. I jot things down. I grabbed her hand and we walked around for awhile. Fully clothed unfortunately.

Ignore it. that I found myself a little flattered by the adulation. 5:30 pm We grab a quick bite to eat at a small Italian cafe near her house. I got behind her and guided her toward the door. What can I tell you? Luckily she was even more freaked. I kept nudging her toward the room chatting her up about the crazy ax man behind the door. Don't always feel the need to keep the conversation going. she's not going to sleep with you tonight because she likes you or because you won't respect her in the morning. We finally pushed the door open basically falling into it. She grabbed a hold of me. There is less talking then on the way up. She quickly pulled me out of the room and out of the barn. Once you are at this stage use any excuse you can to get her touching you. The silence is not uncomfortable. My racing heart and freaked out gestures definitely subtracted from some of that alpha male I had displayed earlier. She gives thumbs down. but don't make the mistake of joining in the conversation because it won't lead anywhere good. such a sexy at ease way. To our surprise though three hawklike birds came flying at our heads. I don’t say anything though. as planned. Let them rid themselves of the guilt. I joked with her saying that someone was behind the door waiting for us. She kept getting closer and closer to me until I could feel the warmth from under her jeans. Another hint. I ask her if she left because of the birds. She tells me I should let her cut my hair. just kidding. She runs her hand through my hair. Oh well. I ask her if she doesn’t like my hair. She left because if the birds hadn’t of come she was about to do something I probably wouldn’t respect her for tomorrow. Our hands are in the middle of the table intertwined. I am genuinely enjoying 243 . She's right. 4:45 pm We are in the car on our way home. Give her time to think about how cool you are and a whole bunch of other reasons to justify fucking you later. when a girl throws out a comment like. But she would like to cut my hair. If the rapport is good enough you can enjoy the silence together. I probably wouldn’t have. She is looking at me hard. It was definitely a buzz kill.Social Superstar I saw a room in the back that I decided would be the room. Then she laughs and says. A lot of times girls are just saying this shit to make themselves feel better about what they are about to do. She says sort of. I have a fucking fear of birds. She has gone googly eyed on me. but she just has this confidence about her. Don't respond with anything. Normally this look scares me.

She is sexually massaging my scalp. But the bait worked and she telling me about a scene in another movie that turned her on. This rates up there with a scalp massage I got from a pro in a termas in Rio a few years back. I watch hair falling off my head. She leaned into me and a titty brushed against me.The Best of TSBMAG.COM her company. I appreciate the enthusiasm in which she is doing 244 . The place is closed but she has a key. Now Gloria's massage was not going to make me cum. Just thought I'd throw that in there so that you don’t think the only thing on my mind is sex. While I'm perfectly happy with my present haircut. I came from that scalp massage. She asks me if I want a pedicure at the salon. I want to open my eyes and look up at her. 6:17 pm The hair cut has begun. I wonder if it will make things awkward if I hate my hair cut. Bobby is all around pleased with this one and gives her the Bobby Rio seal of approval. She runs water over my head. Yes. when I was a little kid I used to get so turned on when the shampoo girls breast would brush against me during the wash that I couldn’t resist the idea of sitting in a chair watching her in the mirror. In the car ride I bring the conversation back into R territory. and don't adjust. I tell her I have a foot fetish. I mean how am I supposed to act if she really fucks it up? My attention is quickly diverted from my haircut to the mirror where I watch as all of her attention is focused on my head. I have towel choked around my neck and a restricting smock on. This is not as sexual as I imagined it would be. 6:15 pm I am sitting in a chair at her salon. 5:50 pm We are in the car on the way to her salon for a haircut. I look up and she is soaping up her hands. I am aroused. but it did make me pitch a tent with my smock as I got up to walk over the other chair for the haircut. Finally her fingers start running through my hair. I wonder if I should try to hide this fact or leave it out in the open and see if she catches it. She leans my head back into the sink and I wince when my neck touches the cold stone of the sink. I decide fuck it. She keeps touching the water and asking me if it's warm enough. so no one will mind. and is basically manager of the place. No joke. I ask her if she gets turned on by the toe polish scene in Bull Durham. I can't tell if she realized I was kidding.

She goes down on me and I am enjoying it way too much. 6:19 pm You are so fucking sexy. I watch her wiggle out of them. I tell her and really mean it. people can see in. As soon as I say this she drops the scissors. She is extremely turned on. I sense that she has come from the oral. The unbuckling begins. No panties!!!! God I love hippie girls. but trimmed up enough to still look edible. My mouth goes down to her belly button area. I smell her neck for a second and then turn her face toward me and start kissing her. say it with all the confidence you can muster up. Make her feel like the luckiest girl in the world to hear it. Just enough muff to keep with the natural girl image. Another hint: That was only the second time I complimented her all 245 . She can't pause for a minute.Social Superstar her job. And then the whole thing. I get on top of her and am kind of grinding into her. I am extremely turned on. My hands are running up and down her legs. I help her with her pants. as they are fond memories. She goes crazy. and then I pull her towards me. If you are uncomfortable reading about my sexual exploits you probably shouldn’t continue. I lay her down on the chair. she suggests we go into the back room. I spin myself around on the chair so that I'm facing her midsection. When you say something like that to a girl. I pull her head up and tell her again how fucking sexy she is. She says we can't do it here. She pulls me into her. At this point I am about to indulge myself in the details. One good compliment can melt away any defense she might have still had up. I tease with crotch rubs. I have no fucking clue what time it is pm I stand up and push Gloria down into the chair. She's got the trademark hippie girl patch. We stare at each other for a second. My mouth goes back in forth from her mouth to her neck. We are making out hard. So I eat. She turns me over and is practically ripping my jeans off of me. Which makes me wonder if I should tip her when she's done? I decide she will get a tip. In the back room there is a recliner chair where they do waxing and stuff. Just when I think I'm going to have to overcome another obstacle. I do the lean back please me lean and await my reward.

But you really have to wait to see where you want to go with this before you start getting so close. Lay there. I am inside of her now. If in a week you decide you're not into them it is easier to start blowing them off. 8:30 pm I drop Gloria off. Hint: Guys even if she's the fuck off the century don't get all gushy telling her how good it was or how much you like her. put your arm around. This is truly some of the best sex I've had in awhile. As much as I am into Gloria she's a little old for daddy and probably won't make the cut. We are both breathless.The Best of TSBMAG. I wiggle my boxer briefs from around my ankles stand up and push her down on the chair. I know some guys would have asked her to spend the night.COM night. I was really enjoying the time with her. Use compliments sparingly so that when you finally give them they will be regarded higher. There is a glorious finale with an extremely satisfying cum. I easily could have spent the rest of the night with her. cuddle like you're really into (it helps when you are) and be fucking silent. But we'll see… 246 . Trust me words are not necessary.

Jake was in no better shape than me.Social Superstar Snowballed Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/21/2008 I was in the worst drought of my life at the time. But worst of all… I just fucking need to blow a load!!! Some of my old college buddies were having a little get together at their house and invited me. As the night started to wind down I got hungry. The mixer was with a subpar sorority and the talent pool was slim. I was fresh out of college.. willing to fuck anything.hungry. I did the walk of shame back downstairs. I mean licking my chops. We jokingly sandwiched her and danced a little.” A few minutes later I noticed a chick that was cute (in relation to the other pigs at the party) and I went over and started conversing with her.. At one point we were standing together sipping keg beer from our red cups when this sloppy fat chick starts trying to dance with us. She excused herself to go to the bathroom. The party was less than spectacular. I waited for her about ten minutes. 247 . At this point there wasn’t anybody downstairs so I just plopped on the couch and waited for Jake so we could leave. Unfortunately my game was pretty bad at this point and I just kept talking about nonsense and wound up boring her to death. The thought of hot young drunk college girls was enough to persuade me and my friend Jake to blow off work the next day and head out on a Tuesday night to relive some former glory. Still in a bit of a depression I proceeded to drink myself silly. When she didn’t return. What was left of my confidence was officially shattered. and whispered to each other that “if all else fails we take her upstairs and tag team her. Although I tried to stay away from frat houses as I was trying to “make it in the real world” the offer was just too tempting. In my drunken state I assumed we hit it off pretty well. I found her upstairs making out with one of the younger frat brothers. I stalked her out like the hungry wolf that I was. and had just been dumped by the girl I thought I was going to marry. My skills and confidence were at an all time low.

She gave me a killer blowjob. “If you’re still down we can do her porn style” “Dude. She had breath that made me want to puke. I immediately got her on the couch. They looked at me in shock when they saw me lying on the couch with the piglet. I am not going to lie and say she had any redeeming qualities. or the realization that I just made out with a piglet three minutes after she swallowed my buddies cum…. I don’t know if it was the 12 red cups of Bud Ice. But I started dry heaving uncontrollably. and finally went outside and pulled the trigger… blowing junks all over the front porch. “Yo. I figured all my dignity was gone. Told her she was sexy. As luck would have it… the door opens again and a handful of girls walk into the house. They were kind enough to head upstairs without making conversation with me. the fact I got caught on the couch with a fatty by my ex girlfriend’s whole sorority. As I was walking outside Jake was walking back in the house. Stroked her hair. I was just with her behind the shed outside. These girls happened to be from my ex girlfriends sorority. But I kept kissing her and slowly slipping my hand down her pants.COM A couple minutes later the fat girl from earlier walks in the front door. 6 years later Jake is still asking me how his babies taste. I’ve got the fat girl inside half naked and ready to fuck” I tell him. I told the piglet I would be right back and headed out to my car to grab a condom. I may as well finish the deal. And a minute later I was lying on a dirty couch making out with her. I just put my head down in shame. I looked at this as a gift from god. She didn’t. 248 .The Best of TSBMAG. swallowed and everything” Jake tells me. Once they left.

just drunk enough to make some bad decisions. Mike and I were sharing a room on the same floor as the groom’s family.” The restaurant was a close knit group and I had a reputation to uphold… I figured I could get Stoute out of the room for a good hour while I gave Tammy the pounding she craved. She was dressed high school whorish as usual… and got quite a few stares from the families of the bride and groom. I had fucked her once before. Tammy was an eighteen year old senior in high school…. Mike and I were sitting in the lobby when Tammy arrived.” This only made her want me more. where I slowly got drunk enough to realize I was wasting a perfectly good hotel room. Tammy was a hostess at a restaurant where I was bar tending at the time. and we're not talking about the sweet innocent type. I stopped at Tammy. It was a little surprising because our friend Chris had basically been “born again” after dating a very Christian girl for the last couple years. Since Mike and I didn’t exactly conform to the couple’s moral standards. The rehearsal after party ended pretty early which left a lot of time to kill at the hotel we were all staying at. The insurance policy came in the form of a pill of Viagra I scored off a friend for “extra measure. Against my better judgment I scanned my phone for some tail to call. as Chris wanted us in close proximity to prevent any debauchery that would have had us over sleep the morning nuptials.. Nevertheless.. Not fall down humiliate yourself drunk. we wound up in his wedding party… The night before the wedding we all got pretty drunk after the rehearsals. A handful of us met at the hotel lobby bar.Social Superstar Hotel Room High Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 01/27/2008 Somehow me and Mike Stoute were asked to be groomsmen in a college buddy of ours wedding. The previous attempt at fucking Tammy’s ridiculously tight pussy left me with no alternative than to secure an insurance policy for the next time. and my performance was less than stellar. I actually came before I got inside her… I caught my load in my hand and then pushed her off me and told her it was “too soon. Chris gave me a look. we didn’t see much of Chris anymore. but I was too 249 .

Chris. The manager explains the situation and tells him to leave. The next thing I know Mike is barreling past them headed towards the bathroom. but the bald guy tackles him just as Mike reaches his hand out to flush the bag. Then switches the bag and shows them his other hand. The hotel manager opens the door. Tammy. Mike makes a running dive toward the toilet. The room is a cloud of smoke and the hotel manager starts harassing us about the smell. The bald guy darts after him. I peeked through the little hole and saw a man in a suit standing next to a bald security guard. but the bald security guard catches him. and shows them his left. 250 . and I just shrug our shoulders. They demand to see both hands. so Mike could roll a “cigar” that he and Tammy could smoke. they would have let us go. The hotel manager calls down to the front desk and tells them to secure a police officer. and pretend we don’t smell anything. Mike. the three of us decided to go up to the room. Then as the manager starts looking around the room. Mike starts pleading with them to not call the cops. He casually tries to grab it without them seeing. The men are not amused. so when the two of them got together the entire room was a giant cloud.COM drunk to give a shit at that point. I just sat there waiting for Mike to leave so that I could get my grubby hands on Tammy. Mike puts the bag in his right hand. Just as the two of them were finishing their second “cigar” there was a pounding knock on the door. They demand to see what's in Mike’s hand. He is reprimanding us sternly.The Best of TSBMAG. After getting the evil eye from just about everyone in the lobby. I let them knock another minute. there is another knock on the door. They both looked at me to answer it as I was apparently the most sober. If you’ve listened to Mike’s incessant coughing during our podcasts you could probably tell that he is quite fond of the green stuff. The bald guy takes the bag and demands for all three of to sit on the bed. sniff around. They tell us that if he hadn’t been a wise ass. The three of us just froze. It is our friend Chris. Finally I slightly opened the door and peaked out. He is a corrections officer. Tammy was just as big a fan. But now the bald guy is pissed. The bald guy pushed the door open. and the two of them entered the room. Mike spots a dime bag on night table. while the three of just stared at each other in disbelief. Just as he gets finished telling us how big scumbags we are.

as Tammy and I get escorted through the halls by the manager and the security guard.” His solution is to call Tammy’s parents and have them come to the hotel to pick her up. Mike and I hand him are licenses.” Even the bald guy is little 251 . he’s going to leave the police out of this. The bald guy has to hold Tammy’s dad back from striking me. We pass various members of Chris’s family on our long walk to the elevator. But he then says “I can’t leave this girl in the room with you two in good conscious. He tells us “You’re friend may have just saved your ass. The hotel manager tells them the whole story with all the gory details. shuts the door and comes back inside. At that precise moment the bald guy pulls my pill of Viagra out of a pill case in my duffel bag. He asks “Whose duffel bag is this?” I raise my hand. None of us say anything.” But he wants our names and some identification. begs the hotel manager to not call the cops. He holds the little blue pill in the air and wants to know who has a prescription for an erectile dysfunction medication.Social Superstar seeing visions of two missing groomsmen and in no mood to explain what jerk offs his friends are to his fiancé. We finally get down stairs where the four of us sit in the lobby waiting for Tammy’s parents to arrive. The hotel manager wants to know why a 26 year old has a high school girl in a hotel room that is filled with booze and other goodies. Twenty five minutes later Tammy’s mom and dad show up. Tammy’s mom is grabbing her ear and calling her a “little tramp. The hotel manager looks at me like I’m the scum of the earth. I apologize and promise that I will never ever see Tammy again. He then tells the bald guy to search the room to make sure we don’t have anything else in the room. The bald guy wants to know why a 26 year old guy is carrying around a pill of Viagra. The only identification Tammy has on her is her high school ID. The manager tells Chris to leave for a minute. I have no answer for either one of them. “And I want you to be there with me when they arrive” he says to me. The manager tells us he’s not going to ruin our friend’s wedding just because we’ve decided to be fuck ups. Lucky Mike gets to stay in the room.

The Best of TSBMAG. I am engaged in a great conversation with one of the bridesmaid. The wedding goes smoothly the next day. Everyone in the room officially agrees that I am the scum of the earth. I sleep soundly that night. I am having a blast. My cell phone goes off with three texts in a row. It will not be pretty walking into work on Monday. a hot cousin from Texas. 252 . 1st text from co-worker Trish “Old man need Viagra?” 2nd text from co-worker Kelly “Tell me she’s lying Bobby?” 3rd text from co-worker Jackie “Your dick only works for me daddy?” I turn my phone off.COM uncomfortable with the whole situation.

Here are my adventures. Tracy is too drunk to notice. At that very moment I know Buff is motioning with his hand from his solar plex to hers. These were the craziest times because it was all so new and life transforming. Buff continues on… “…like six months from now… still feeling that sense of connection… and looking back at tonight as having been the start of it. I’ve got the nervous giggles. I know what he’s going to say next. I sip my beer. “Have you ever felt an instantaneous connection to someone? Like maybe as you’re sitting there looking at him… a cord of light grows from you to them” Buff’s voice is radiating from the bedroom.” 253 . I want to repeat it along with him.Social Superstar The Early Days Experimenting with Speed Seduction Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/12/2008 I’ve wanted to write in detail about some of my experiences in the community for awhile now. I know its coming. The Early Years: Experimenting with Speed Seduction 1998 Buff is in the bedroom with Suzanne. I hope you find them informative and entertaining. “And as that cord glows with the warm of that connection… maybe you can even imagine a time in the future…” I’m lipping along with him. I’m waiting for Suzanne to burst out laughing. Amazingly when I sat down to write it all came back to me crystal clear. She flips over a card and tells me I have to drink. So I’ve decided to start a new series about the early years. It's hard to believe that it's been 10 years for me.

Ross Jeffries says “A kiss on the cheek is supplication.” Suzanne. It is filled with “weasel phrases” and “embedded commands. He’s such a sweet guy. Her face drops. but I lean back and wave. She kisses Mike on the cheek. “Is he coming by after work?” she asks. “Pretend I just said something funny.” “Do I look hungry?” Mike asks.The Best of TSBMAG. “Yea… yea” I say. Mike and I are drinking Bud Lights and discussing the past couple of weeks. comes over to Mike and I to say hello. I pat the index card in my pocket. already drunk. We are talking and laughing and smiling but we’re not saying much of anything. “Are you alright?” Tracy asks me.COM My giggling causes beer to shoot out of my nose. “So where’s Buff?” “I think he’s working” I tell her.” she says. 254 .” Mike busts into laughter.” I tell him. “A little. All that matters is that we don’t look hungry. Its college night and half of Montclair State is there. At least not much of anything that makes sense. The Instantaneous Connection Pattern A few weeks later we are at Fatsos. “I love him. She turns to kiss me. Buff is notoriously missing. It doesn’t matter. Ross Jeffries says “Those who look hungry never get fed. Mike smiles at me. He is on his third date this week.” Straight to the point she says.

Social Superstar “Not sure. “It was actually kind of scary. “The girl walks right up to. “So I was just talking to Suzanne… and she kept repeating Buff’s name to herself over and over again. I pour the rest of my beer in the pisser. Instead I say. 255 . A life defining moment on the bowl You never imagine that your life is going to change while taking a shit. Just then Mike interrupts us. A clear head beats a beer buzz for confidence.” I tell her. looks me dead in the eyes. ‘Imagine…me going down on you… all night long’” I say this staring directly into Angela’s eyes. who has a cult like following of guys all claiming that he can seduce any women in a matter of minutes. The card reads “Use quotes” I walk out of the bathroom and bump into Angela from Sigma Kappa. But if it wasn’t for a tad of constipation I would probably not have made it past the pictures in the issue of Playboy I was browsing through.” he says. “Okay” Suzanne says then walks away. I pull out my index card and review the notes.” “What?” Angela asks. “Sweet Caroline” is blasting through the speakers and she’s trying to get me to dance with her. “Yea… It really took me back…I didn’t even know what to say. I head to the bathroom to regroup.” I smile. “You wouldn’t believe what this girl just came up and said to me. and says. then blushes. “Really?” Angela asks.” I say. In the back of the magazine I stumbled across an article by Peter Alson about this ugly middle aged guy named Ross Jeffries. He pulls me aside and says.

COM Alson weaves tales of lowly computer nerds scoring blowjobs from aspiring models and playboy bunnies in coffee shop bathrooms.The Best of TSBMAG. I was immediately sold. 256 . Super Guru Pickup God Ross Jeffries has defied nature and figured out the secret to the universe.

tongues thrashing together. my other hand is wrapped around the back of her neck. I’ve got one hand cupping her bare ass. “All the better. I was part of the crowd. Easily assignable to success. I’m pinned down by my seat belt. The seat belt has me trapped and our mouths don’t reach each others. “Are you wearing contacts?” I ask her. Another time I called a radio station every hour on the hour until I won tickets to a Tom Petty concert. She is unbuckling me. I’m free now and our mouths are locked. Deanna clutches the lever of my seat and pushes me back.” is how she described me to her friend. She puts her finger to my face and I put it between my lips. She is running her hand down my chest.” Deanna is whispering in my ear. She climbs on top of me. Easily assignable to coincidence. My baseball hats. my Sublime tshirts.Social Superstar The Falling in Love Pattern Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 03/12/2008 “I don’t even know you. Sometimes foolish men attribute their success to blind chance.” I say. my five o’clock shadow. I look to down and see that it’s a pair of her turquoise colored panties. and an insurance check paid a trip to Cancun I didn’t think I would be able to afford. With her other hand she cups the back of my neck and pulls my face toward her. Tonight is a tossup. Other equally foolish men mistake coincidence for success. For the first five weeks of our Creative Non Fiction class she didn’t know I existed. “No… why?” 257 . Deanna puts something soft and damp into my hands. There was the time my car got hit by a van full of illegal Mexicans. She is hiking her yellow sun dress up to her waist. my bloodshot eyes… “A typical frat boy.

I’ve got a tit smashed against my face. They had the ‘jump in and learn to swim’ type attitude with the stuff. winning a spelling bee in the sixth grade.The Best of TSBMAG. Paris in the spring time… I wrote about the first time I fell in love… She’s straddling me and our pubes are rubbing hard against each other.” she says. Her tongue is cleaning out my ear. Her eyes roll back into her head. Engines igniting. She reaches between our legs and wraps her hand around The Boss. “Beautiful. a Garth Brooks concert. She adjusts herself and guides me into her. This was the big go… Mike and Buff had been using Speed Seduction frequently since the cassette tapes arrived in the mail a few weeks back.” I say. I mainly sat in front of my mirror reciting patterns and practicing tonality. “Tell me. The perfectionist in me always found it wasn’t quite the right time. 258 . There is a reflection from the street light our car is parked under.” I say. “Do you think I’m pretty?” she whispers. Success or Coincidence? There was a moment of hesitation when the professor called on me to read my story to the class. the birth of a child. Success or coincidence? She’s fumbling with the buttons on my jeans. Outside cars are passing by. Our assignment a week ago in class was to write a short story describing a memorable experience. as she slides my jeans down. and her pale blue eyes are glowing like an Alaskan Huskies. a death of a father. There were stories about a skiing in Vermont. Horns are beeping. I lift my ass.COM “Just wondering. a first trip to Yankee stadium.

you just want to release them in a flood and I find when you do that now with me I find you just feel so enchanted like you are now under a love spell cast upon you such that you can’t control yourself and just find yourself going wild with it” Success or Coincidence? The Boss explodes. I put my hand over her mouth to silence her. becoming aware… of the rhythm of your breathing… the beating of your heart… and that sense of growing fascination… such that as you continues to be aware of all this… one particular feature of the their face begins to rivet your attention… so as you just continue to keep looking… it’s like the rest of the environment disappears… and the entire world becomes this face…” I am keenly aware of the eyes of the class on me. You’ve already begun to feel that connection… and grow even more attracted. I’m getting a case of rug burn on my crotch. Deanna collapses on top of me. that’s when you can make that connection…” The Falling in Love Pattern Deanna is grunting and growling. “You don’t even know why you just have to go deep inside and find all those values that are so important to you but you just naturally link them up with this person such that you find yourself beginning to look through the eyes of attraction … cause I find when you look through the eyes of attraction. You begin to pay attention in that special way.Social Superstar I am in Creative Non Fiction reading my story from the paper in front of me… “It was my third date with Shari when I realized what was happening. “And as you feel that passion growing more and more maybe to a point where you feel yourself just letting go completely as you allow this person to come deep inside releasing all those feelings that have been building and building up inside. I have to lift her a little so I can bounce her up and down on The Boss. 259 . First. It’s like you’re not even aware until it’s too late. Her eyes are closed which is good because a couple students are walking past our car. I see them peak in but continue walking. The restriction of fucking in a Jetta is unsettling. look through the eyes of desire. I am self conscious and a bit uncomfortable with what I’m reading… but it’s too late to stop.

fruits and vegetables. I spotted a discount shelf. For all her flaws… I do say.99. This place had everything I ever dreamed about. bondage..COM Don’t Buy the Cheap Sex Toys Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 07/22/2008 I’ve always been pretty experimental in the bedroom… dare I say… kinky.. edible panties. But nothing was worse than the time I cheeped out on the sex toys. I’ve found girls willing to let me indulge in my whims. I was a kid in the candy store. With the amount of money in my pocket. she was gung ho in the bedroom. Luckily. or anal beads. One day I ventured off to the holy grail of perverted fun. I went with the anal beads for the low low price of $4. This was back when I was dating my first girlfriend Jillian. There was the time we lost the key to the handcuffs…. I wanted everything. Role playing. The time I jokingly asked my ex to pee on me… and she did! The time I bought the super large dildo to play with on her… and then suddenly felt inadequate. blindfolds. I have a wild imagination. Only I had very little money.The Best of TSBMAG. my choice was narrowed down to a cock ring. But what I’ve noticed while mulling over my exploits is that often these whims have turned out to end on a sour note. right from the start. There were a handful of items marked down for clearance. The package promised that if I inserted them into her ass… and 260 . There was the time I took a roll of film of my ex in compromising positions… that mysteriously disappeared when we went to the CVS to pick them up. For those of you unaware of what anal beads are. sue me. voyeurism… we did it all. We were like a couple of perverts trying to see what we could come up with next. The Pleasure Palace. these are a series of beads attached to each other usually by a string with a handy retrieval ring. Lucky for me.

It is obvious that the bead slipped over the last knot. It doesn’t. I quickly tried to hide the string under the pillow. so I reach under her ass and grab the ring and get ready to yank. They were still pretty lubed up from her pussy juice." Things started out amusing enough with the beads. right? Jillian wasn’t thrilled with my new toy. We tried them out in her vagina first. Wailing away. But I can be pretty persuasive. I was a proud man. I sold her on the "new orgasmic heights. Jillian starts asking. She jumps up and grabs the string from under the pillow. By this time. and usually felt dirty about it afterwards. in and out. She reaches her hand around to her ass and starts holding her anus open while jumping up and down. The string which had five beads going in… had come out with four. She only mildly liked it when I did her anal. I pray the bead will pop out. 261 . She squirmed a bit… but soon enough I’m digging away. so they went in without a fight. I started poking my finger around her ass trying to warm her up to it. She starts panicking. Just as the two of us reach orgasm I pull the string in one quick flick of the wrist. I’ve got her legs spread over her head. Jillian starts making her "I’m going to cum" face. In and out. As our session got steamier. That was until I looked down at the string in my hand. But my face must have given it away. I take this as my cue to start sliding the anal beads in. and she likes it. "What's wrong?" "One of the balls didn’t come out" I tell her. I’m doing her pretty hard missionary. Worth a shot.Social Superstar then pulled them out right as she climaxed… she would reach new orgasmic heights. She did a giant pelvic thrust… but then flashed me a reassuring smile to let me know she enjoyed.

I say "Maybe we should go to the Health Center on campus. After a few minutes they stop." She kneels down over the bowl and lunges her ass into the air. She’s making some nauseating faces and I have to leave the room. and growling all over again. "It's right there. I calm her down enough to walk her into the bathroom. "I feel it" she screams. She starts pushing. I want to reach in. "You better get this fucking thing out of my ass. "Push" I tell her. she wasn’t the most mentally stable girl. I sit her naked body on the toilet and tell her to push like she constipated… push like she’s trying to get a baby out. "Maybe you should try taking a shit. She begins pushing. Now she’s crying so loud I can’t concentrate. I open the door and peak in. but I am afraid I’ll just push it back further.The Best of TSBMAG. Jillian has her ass raised above the bowl and is shaking it violently." I take from her reaction that wasn’t an option." I say. She starts hyperventilating. Look and see if you can see it." She looks like she’s going claw my face off. I get behind her and start prodding around. The grunts and growls that were coming out the bathroom would have scared small children. Miraculously the little purple bead appears… but just as I’m about to grab it her anus closes shut and sucks it back in. I take my two fingers and pry apart her anus. grunting. 262 . I can feel it. She’s screaming. See if they have any suggestions.COM If you remember from previous mentions of Jillian. But nothing is falling out.

263 . I walk in the room and grab the string and flush all the beads down the toilet. The bead plops onto the floor. harder this time" I demand. I pick the thing up and flush it down the toilet. my friends. I’m really hoping a turd doesn’t pop out along with the bead. And that. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" she screams.Social Superstar "Push again. I’d have to dump her. is why you don’t buy the cheap sex toys. She’s pushing so hard one of the veins in her forehead seems it's going to burst.

8:44 I’ve finally got some momentum going. I give up. But I’m thinking now… the older she is… 264 . Sofia could be 25 or 40 and I wouldn’t be surprised. I float different pictures through my mind… first. 9:05 My girl gives me a little peck on my lips. That’s what happens when you cram 9 people into a three bedroom apartment. But just outside the door there are seven different Spanish voices continually reminding me that my time in the bathroom is limited. c’mon other people need to use the bathroom” my girlfriend shouts in … Everything is fucked. I finish putting on my shirt. My dick goes limp. I start unrolling some toilet paper to finish into… “Bobby. She rolls her eyes and tells me no. She tells me not to be so grumpy and that I better have a good time tonight. one of my girlfriend’s cousins… Anna and her big fake titties… then Sofia and her rebellious tomboy attitude… but the noise is just too distracting. I beg one last time… “A goodbye blow job…please?” 9:25 I’m in the backseat of Sofia’s car and I’m trying to calculate just how old she is. And normally I wouldn’t have cared much. my mind trying to hold a fantasy long enough to rub one out.COM That Drunken ight in Medellin Story Written by Bobby Rio Original Published: 08/18/2008 8:40 pm My dick is in my left hand… my right hand is fumbling through the medicine cabinet for some kind of lube… I’m squatting over the toilet. I pull her close and grind my hard-on into her. Privacy is nonexistent.The Best of TSBMAG. The most action I’ve gotten all week in this chastity ward of an apartment.

“You like the Colombian girls?” he asks. “I no like” she says in broken English. I lift the glass and down the shot myself. He puts his arm around me. a banker… a cowboy. 9:46 I follow the cousins to a table filled with about eight or nine Colombians. His name is Jim. In fact. Sofia notices my curiosity and says “Aguardiente. I try pouring Sofia a shot. The room we wind up in is themed like a cathedral. “Muy Bien! Mucho gusto!” He asks me why my girlfriend didn’t come. The waiters are walking around dressed like typical town people… there is a priest. She shakes her finger no again.Social Superstar the more likely she’d be up for doing something if something should happen to come up… 9:44 We get into the bar… it’s themed like a typical Colombian town. a farmer. I smell the glass to make sure it wasn’t water. There are three bottles of the stuff on the table. We knock glasses and shoot them. I explain that she had a wedding rehearsal … and has to get up early tomorrow for the wedding. and a slight bit creepy. I am doing the obligatory kiss on the check to bunch of chubby Spaniards… the loud alpha male of the group introduces himself in English.. Because in a brown eyed world… the blue eyed man is king. . I am happy that there will be at least one person I can communicate with here tonight. 10:00 Jim calls me over to him. “I no care” I say and fill the shot glass. “Si” I say. 265 . She shakes her finger no.. And the town bum… 9:45 I walk through smiling… making sure they notice… And they always notice. you like?” I smile. He hands me a shot. Each room with a different theme. a nun.. 9:51 Shot number one goes down smoothly. “So you can have some fun tonight!” he says.

She doesn’t know daddy. 10:18 266 . 10:11 I turn to Sofia. Sofia grabs my arm… and tells me in her adorable broken English to “slow down or I get too crazy” She’s probably right… but I’m past the point of reason. It’s too loud to deal with language barriers. I fill a few glasses and try to hand the sixteen year olds shots. I pour the three of us shots and we gulp them down. I try… but it’s useless. Sofia not wanting to be seen dancing with the gringo… pawns me off on her sister. They shake their fingers no. 10:13 Pretty soon I’ve made both of us uncomfortable. Some young girls… that can’t be older than sixteen. 10:16 There are a few new faces at our table. I want to make conversation. 10:14 I get back just in time for another shot.COM 10:02 Jim calls over an old fatty. I assume he is trying to hook me up with her… I give him the thumbs down. My lack of rhythm is apparent. I push the glasses toward them again. She takes my hand and leads me to the dance floor. She doesn’t know how dirty I can get. but nothing another shot of Aguardiente won’t cure. Her sister wants to play dirty. I fumble for the bottle and begin pouring another shot. I start to wish I Googled the age of consent down here. I’m a little embarrassed by my blunder. For all intensive purposes I’ll assume it’s sixteen. Jim introduces me to the fatty… his wife. Things get ugly quick on the dance floor.The Best of TSBMAG. My constant humping of her leg and staring at her tits has seemingly offended her… I put my tail between my legs and head back to the table.

He looks at the group of girls and nods at me. I look back at him over my shoulder… now he gives me the thumbs up. whether or not you can maintain loyalty. .Social Superstar Jim sees me trying to make conversation with the girls and comes over to's a moral test of yourself. 10:22 Time for a piss break. Jim seemingly pleased… heads back to the table and leaves me and his daughter alone. He actually pushes us closer together. 10:19 He introduces me to the sixteen year old… his daughter. 10:25 I regroup in the bathroom. Here are the definite memories I have: … Gulping down another four or five shots of Aguardiente … Jim’s daughter shaking her finger no as I try to lick her ear …Jim’s fat wife pulling me off her daughter and then scolding her daughter in public Here are the fuzzy memories I have: 267 . As we are dancing Jim comes up behind his daughter and sandwiches her against me. Before I have time to explain… he tells me to dance with his daughter. Because when you can be loyal… that’s meaningful… So you’re going to go out there… drink your drink… be friendly… not too friendly. Yea right!!! This is where things get blurry. And that’s all you’re going to do... She is in the middle of us and I’m grinding lower and lower with her. I give him two big thumbs up. and then you’re going go home and jerk off.

I have vague flashes of the night before… I panic. Naked. It’s not going to happen. 9:20 am I wake up alone. I try to wake her up. Naked. I’m standing buck naked in the room where the aunt. (Most likely explaining that I’m a drunken mess who has no clue what room he is in… or probably even what country he is in) The two of them guide my naked ass back to my room. In the other room I hear the Spanish chatter of the entire family having breakfast. I am completely dehydrated and desperately want water. 268 . This time I wonder into my girl’s cousin Adolfo’s room.The Best of TSBMAG. I start to crawl in bed with him. naked. I head back into our room. but thought of going into the kitchen to face the family is terrifying. He wakes up and flips out. I decide to piss before going to sleep. I walk to the bathroom. I try for a few minutes to jerk off. I take off all of my clothes and demand sex. I close my eyes and go back to sleep. I momentarily snap back into consciousness and walk into the hallway. She is not turned on my aggressive drunken behavior… or my breath which reeks of puke. I retreat to my bed.COM … Sofia pushing me into a car with a random Spanish guy … Driving through the mountains of Medellin thinking I’m being kidnapped …throwing up in a port-a-potty on the side of the road: Here is where things get ugly: I stumble into the apartment and stalk out my girlfriend. Only I’m not in our room. Only they are not sleeping. Hearing his anger the aunt comes into the room and in Spanish intervenes. They are staring at me and laughing and pointing for me to go back into the hallway and to my own room. on my bed. Sofia and Anna are sleeping. I go caveman on her.

They are nice about it… but are openly amused. She asks me “What the hell happened last night” 11:53 I do the walk of shame to the bathroom. All I can think about was how pronounced the “shrinkage” was…. 269 . When I expose myself from the room… the entire family starts mocking me in Spanish.Social Superstar 11:40 My girlfriend wakes me up and tells me that I have to get dressed for her friend’s wedding.

. money. This step is more important than any lesson you will learn from here on out. The title of this series is 31 Days to Better Game… but “better game” has a different meaning for everyone reading this. If you have had difficulty with talking to women. or any other area of your life… until you develop a clearly defined goal for yourself your mind will continue producing the same results you’ve always gotten.The Best of TSBMAG. This means that if you consistently think of the lack in your life (of women. These three books all explore the ancient principle that your mind will create whatever reality you present it. building attraction. But if you train your mind to see abundance (of women.COM 31 Days to Better Game Day 1 Designing Your Life Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/10/2008 The first step you need to take to improve any area of your life is determining your desired outcome. Have you read the book The Secret? Or how about Real Magic? Or Think and Grow Rich? These three books (if read and implemented correctly) are worth their weight in gold. and friendship) the universe will continue to provide you a life of lack. 270 . money) the universe will provide you a life of abundance. How will you look after you’ve achieved better game? How will you act? What kind of girls will you be dating? Sleeping with? What will a day in your life look like once you’ve got this area of your life mastered? How will you feel? What kind of thoughts will be running through your mind? These are all questions that you cannot ignore. In order to fully experience and appreciate the lessons you’ll receive over the next 31 days you need to have a clearly defined end result. Having a clearly defined end result means knowing exactly where you want to be 31 days from now. managing a relationship..

It needs to be as detailed as possible. and act like once you’ve mastered this area of your life. You need to close your eyes and spend the next thirty minutes visualizing yourself as your Ideal Self. Your Homework Everyone reading this needs to set aside one hour in a quiet place. Next Every morning when you awaken… take out that piece of paper and read it a few times to yourself. the thoughts running through your mind. I felt the same way years ago when I was presented with this concept. See your ideal self. the way your voice sounds. After you’ve spent about thirty minutes just completely immersed in this “new you” stop your visualizations and grab your pen and paper. write ” I am having sex the girl I’ve desired” and so on. I want you to trust me to give this a chance. You need to read this piece of paper and be instantly transported into that reality. The idea here is to create a blueprint of the life you want.” If during your visualization you saw yourself having unbelievable sex with a perfect 10. Then close your eyes imagine this reality. summary of this new you. For example. suppose in your mind you saw yourself surrounded by a set of beautiful women and they were all laughing and having a good time… you would write “I am confident around large groups of beautiful women and easily create enjoyable conversation while building attraction. See your ideal life. visualize yourself in the company of the woman you want to be with. Now I want you to write the most descriptive. It needs to be filled with emotions and feelings. But I’m going to safely say that it is magic. feel like. I want all of you reading this to put aside your personal opinions and judgments and reservations. Write everything in the present tense. Clearly imagine the women and note the way you interact with them. clearly defined. Imagine clearly what you will look like. Take a pen and paper with you. pay attention to the way you walk. thought out.Social Superstar If this sounds new age and hokey… wait a minute. 271 . As you run this image through your mind.

.” Every night before you go to bed. See if so real that it feels like you're dreaming. “I am always meeting and attracting new interesting girls. repeat the ritual of the morning. The rest of you can keep your excuses I don’t want to hear them. Don’t slack. I’m not asking much. I’m just asking you to spend a half an hour in the morning. At the end of the 31 days I want feedback on this exercise… I only want feedback from those of you that followed it every day exactly as I’ve stated. Even if you deviate from your “ideal self” in your current reality.COM The entire time you're visualizing this life… let your mind go. There is no hard work involved. You will be tempted to let your negativity and doubt creep in and tell you this isn’t possible.. Lay there holding that image (with feeling) firmly in your mind. continue to talk to yourself positively.” Throughout the day try to remember to keep your self. Those that choose to follow this… I know that I will be hearing miraculous stories! If you want some further reading on this subject I highly recommend reading The Secret 272 . I’m not asking you to approach 10 sets a night….The Best of TSBMAG. and a half an hour in the evening visualizing the life you want. I want each and everyone one of you to do this for one in the positive. or remind yourself of your shortcoming or flaws… Clear your mind of the negativity and focus solely on “ideal life.

only you can. that is. but I can tell you how I overcame the very same problems. and give some personal insights. and hope that you can learn from my experiences. So what is it? To me. I can’t convince you how to think or look at life differently. Inner game is also a topic that I think can only be discussed from a personal level. I’m going to get into both of these. inner game problems boils down to two things: your experience and your mindset. but life itself. so hopefully by the end of this article you’ll have a clearer understanding of what exactly it is that you need to work on to fix your own issues. “Practice”. I always answer the same.Social Superstar Day 2 Developing Inner Game Written by Cajun Originally Published: 06/12/2008 Inner game is probably one of the most popular subjects in the community. It’s a major sticking point for nearly everyone who has trouble talking to women and it’s a problem that can be difficult to fix as well. Every problem you run into with not just women. This is bullshit! To be scared of the possible 273 . It’s only when were thrown into situations that are unfamiliar to us that we start to lose confidence in ourselves. can be attributed to one of these two areas. When you think about what confidence actually is you realize that it's simply doing something that you’ve done enough times to be comfortable with. since it tends to be rooted in a lifetime’s worth of negative beliefs that are based on things like fear and rejection. Experience: When people ask me how I developed my “Rock solid confidence”. The sad and somewhat ironic reality is that most men are not comfortable talking to women simply because they don’t talk to women! It’s a negative feedback loop that’s perpetuated by a fear of “what might go wrong”.

This is how we believed reality worked. but you got on anyway because you saw how much fun all the other kids were having. there may only be 1 reality. when you were learning to ride a bike. 274 . but the best advice I can give you is to simply accept it. don’t get mad at her or yourself. Getting used to rejection isn’t easy. don’t go home. the outer circle being reality. and it’s a game that a lot of people are scared to play. reality exists inside our mind. Mind Set: Most of us grew up in a society that believed in a 2 concentric circle model of reality. through our inner circle. Well this is the same thing. That is.COM negative outcomes is to be scared of the very thing that enables you to get better! Think about it this way. Who’s to say I’m not a figment of your imagination. and that our consciousness is the outer circle. and the inner circle being our consciousness. The sooner you realize that rejection is a necessary evil. We are now learning through quantum physics that reality is actually the inner circle. Life is a game. It’s possible. were you too scared to get on because of a fear that you might fall down? Maybe. from your subconscious mind. What does this mean? As far as any of us know. We experience the outer circle.The Best of TSBMAG. it took me a while before I got used to rejection enough that I could understand where I went wrong. or the world around us. The first few weeks were rough. or simply ignored. The truth is. the sooner you can come to terms with it and move past it. just accept that it’s a completely normal. your reality. That is. and necessary part of the learning process. if you’d rather). our consciousness. You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs. reality. told off. we create our own reality with our thoughts (Or beliefs. whether any of us actually exist or not is irrelevant. even then you realized that the reward was worth the risk. Don’t be one of them. writing this entire article out to send a message to YOU. your own. that our consciousness was independent of it…but recently this all changed. I remember when I first started out with this stuff I used to get drinks thrown in my face.

all I will have to do is read this piece of paper and it will all come back. let’s say. In fact you can have. I’ll end this article with something that I’ve never written about before: I remember the very night that I became good at attracting women. but the programmer tells you some hints on how to play. if you want to be. The AI is so smart you can’t tell it’s not a real person. 15 years from now programmers invent this computer game that is virtually identical to reality. Now. a rich Casanova in the game. Think of it as your “console hack”" I’m sure you saw this coming. he says this: “This software is programmed to work intuitively with your brain. and then the program takes care of the rest. The five senses are so accurately programmed that there is no detectable difference to reality. let’s say. and how they work. What does the paper say? “The secret to becoming amazing at attracting women is…to remember that you already are.” Sound a little like the matrix? Well that’s ok. you get to play this game. and you will become one. The trick is you have to actually believe it. It has since become my mantra. Cajun. and be anything you want in this program as long as you ask for it using these “beliefs”. and I know that if down the road I ever forget everything that I’ve learned in the past few years.Social Superstar I recently received an email from a student of mine asking about the power of beliefs. I remember because I had an epiphany that night and it was so mindblowing that I had to write it down as soon as I came home. I can only give advice on inner game from my own personal perspective and this is simply how I believe reality works. then all you have to do is believe that you ARE a rich Casanova. I replied with the following: “Think of it this way: what if.” Your welcome. 275 . but this “game” already exists and it’s called reality. So. You become who you believe you are. like I said.

posture and grooming tips. smiling.” I wrote a post a couple months ago called 10 Ways to Immediately Make Yourself More Attractive. “You’ve got to present your best self. By just implementing these 10 tips you will begin to not only look more attractive. If you look in the mirror and see things jiggling. but you will begin to feel much more attractive. and change his wardrobe. 276 . hit the gym. The list includes simple to improve areas like skin color. What I did not include on that list but is equally important is maintaining a fit body. I’m not saying that you have to look like David Beckham… but you know deep inside if you’re body can be improved upon. He had the less-thanhandsome Strauss shave his balding head. I highly recommend reading over that list. hair style. grow a goatee. If you’ve read The Game you know that the first advice Mystery gave Neil Strauss was to improve upon his look. But you don’t need to be naturally good looking to make a good first impression. there is no excuse not hit to hit the gym. Like Strauss says.The Best of TSBMAG.” There is no denying that physical attractiveness makes it easier for attraction to take place.” The phrase should have been worded “Looks only matter so much. If you’re unsure of how to lose that extra weight check out this article about shedding unwanted pounds… if you’re looking to gain some muscle read this article on bulking up for the summer. If you’ve seen the before and after pictures you know what a drastic improvement these simple steps made.COM Day 3 Updating Your Look Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published:06/13/2008 There is a misused phrase being tossed around in regards to attracting women… “Looks don’t matter. get a tan. If you want further information on designing a weight loss/muscle gain plan read this free personal trainer program-the site has like five hundred articles on every aspect of weight training and nutrition.

Remembers just because “Looks only matter so much” you shouldn’t use that as an excuse to be lazy about your appearance.Social Superstar After you’ve improved upon the areas of your appearance that need some work… it's time to update your wardrobe. Although the article was geared toward high school students there is advice on creating your image that can be applied to all age groups. I am not a firm believer in peacocking in the sense that Mystery and Style teach. Today’s Homework Today you need to make the necessary changes to present your best self. If you still have questions regarding how to go about updating your life you might find an article I wrote for my How to Be Popular in High series helpful. More importantly is dressing in a way that promotes your self confidence. No matter what area of your physical appearance (if any) needs an overhaul there is more than enough information contained in this lesson to get you well on your way. But I do believe in using clothes and accessories as a way to attract positive attention. If you’ve got little or no sense of fashion than read through our men’s fashion articles here at the site. If you’re still looking for more advice than I would recommend purchasing Brad P’s Fashion Bible. Would you be attracted to a girl who isn’t doing her best to present herself to you? 277 . We’ve had a couple fashion consultants contributing articles to make your choices easier. The article also talks about creating a presence and takes quite a bit from the classic article The 7 Elements of Charisma.

It just means that everything you learn needs to be implemented at all times. Always be presenting your best self. and AFC tendencies….” It is so hard for them because all week they’ve created a pattern of bad posture. Every lesson that you learn throughout these 31 days needs to become a new habit in your life. Always be chatting up strangers. approach anxiety. breathed. I spent this weekend with AFC Adam Lyons from Pua Training in New York. The biggest mistake most guys tend to make while trying to improve their game is they think that it only counts when they are at a bar or club. study lines. Is it because they are that much better salesman? No.The Best of TSBMAG. It’s because a successful salesman is constantly marketing himself while the other 90% do their 9-5 in the office and call it a day. They read books. Always be opening sets. boring conversation.” And he’s right. start 278 . Does that mean all you should care about is game? Hell no. If you’ve just read an article about flirting.” Adam made the comment several times that he “is game. No matter who he was talking to he was projecting the same charismatic personality. Always strive to make your conversations memorable. and slept game. If I had to name the most inspiring thing I got out of the weekend it was Adam’s ability to always “be on. learn to “be alpha” but they sit in their house all week waiting for the weekend to practice game.COM Day 4 Always be Advertising Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/16/2008 In a common sale’s office 10% of the salesmen make 90% of the money. Always dress to impress. poor tonality. He lived. then they expect to miraculously be the life of the party come Saturday night. A lot guys wonder how come some nights it is so hard to get “in state. He didn’t wait until heading to the clubs at night to go into game mode.

Your co-workers who used to ignore you will be asking you to come hang out with them. I don’t care if you have to flirt with your sixty year old neighbor….Social Superstar flirting immediately. like the most successful salesmen. is that you will find. More importantly though. Once you get in the habit of always reinforcing the skills you’ve been learning. Always leave the house expecting to meet the girl of your dreams. you will find that it becomes a lot easier to get “in state” since you will be spending most of your time in the right frame of mind. The counter girl at your local bank will be dropping you IOIs. Because you just don’t know when you will bump into her. 279 . you need to always be reinforcing these skills. If you’re always “on” you’ll find that you’ll naturally be attracting more women into your life. that the best leads come when you least expect it.

The Best of TSBMAG. social acceptance and notoriety. act and by their body language. power. wealth. it will make the life of her kids better and even make her friends jealous and envious.COM Day 5 Being High Status Written by Mack Tight Originally Published: 06/17/2008 I was reading Bobby’s recent post “Never Show Emotion When She Walks Away” and all I could think was “could that dude make it any more obvious that he was low status”? Let me explain… When you think of “high status males” who do you think of? Donald Trump… George Clooney… Kobe Bryant… your favorite politician… Now if any of these guys had an attractive girl make out with them and run off would they set around and pout like a tit baby about it? Fuck no… They are flooded by a large quantity of attractive women in their life… and even if you temporarily took away their money. In Wisconsin we deer hunt and my Dad always told me to never cough because a deer’s hearing is much better than a human’s… Well a woman’s “status” senses are far superior to a man’s. …yes. Because with “high status” comes most of the traits women desire in men like security. clothes. any woman would still be able to read that they are high status within minutes of meeting them by the way they talk. cars and made them wear a disguise. Not only will landing a guy like that make her life better. women are actually very competitive with each other but in more subtle ways than men… 280 . fame. Now you might ask why “status” is so important to women.

“Commons” were ummm… common… …don’t be a common! The guy in Bobby’s story showed to everyone in the bar and most importantly to the girl that he was a “common” by gawking at her and pouting. It is quite obvious that an attractive girl kissing him was a “big deal” and a rare occurrence in his life… That made it quite obvious to everyone that he was “low status”. Now similarly. if you go to a car dealership to deal on a car. If on the other hand you don’t give a shit when dealing with a hot girl you’re showing your supply is low and your demand is high. There was a term called a “common” for sports cards of a player no one wanted. Supply and demand is not unique to women and men either… Why is gas $4 a gallon? Supply and demand! Why are diamonds so expensive? Supply and demand! (Thanks to DeBeers) It is like your status is a publicly traded stock when you go into a club and your every action makes it go up and down in value.Social Superstar So how can women sense your status? They can sense your supply versus your demand… If you are clingy and needy it shows to them that you have a low demand and a high supply. Here’s another analogy from my childhood… When I was a kid I collected sports cards. you always want to give them the impression that there are other dealerships that are in the hunt for your business… 281 . Now if a guy’s supply is high and demand low and attractive women is the commodity. the attractive women are going to have a harder time landing this guy’s business. This raises his status to them.

For example. Always give the impression that you have options in your life even if you don’t. High status men do not care what others think. some like dogs and cats but I LOVE MONKEYS! I had guys busting on me about it but I could HANDLE it. some old carpenter pants and a boring t-shirt of your local major sports team screams “I’m high status”? To me it screams “I don’t care how I look.COM If you go to a job interview you want to give the interviewers the impression that there are many companies of courting you… …you are living in a world of opportunities and abundance. What can I say. I recently bought a bright green Paul Frank t-shirt with Julius the monkey on it. I want to fit in and I’m scared to stand out”! That’s what “peacocking” is all about… having the balls to stand out… …and I’m not talking about even wearing goggles and a fuzzy hat. I even had some girls who BUSTED on me just like the guys did but I was able to turn the tables and get attraction from them.The Best of TSBMAG. 282 . I had women cold approaching ME about the shirt and I went to town from there. Now let me switch things up and touch on some community concepts that hit on the “high status” point… Peacocking Do you think wearing a pair of Sketchers. I bet everyone of those douche bags who were busting on me went out and bought the same shirt the next day… …but I have a feeling they had no luck with it because they could not properly handle the reactions. Negging “Negging” is defined as saying something to an attractive girl that subtly shows her that you are not caught in a hypnotic trance over her beauty.

Sure.Social Superstar Calling it “negging” was a bad move because people outside of the community assume it is just about putting down women. endlessly approaching her and showering her with complements… …but you quickly knock her off the pedestal to defuse her defenses. Maybe they’ll talk about music or pop culture. Instead he is probably going to vibe with her about cool things. It does a good job of differentiating how needy and high status guys communicate with women. Many people who are new to the community do not understand how to calibrate proper negging. take Mystery’s “its funny how your nose twitches when you talk” or Neil Strauss’ routine of picking a piece of lint off a girl’s shirt. buying her drinks. You need to differentiate “negging” from being an obnoxious asshole. Basically you are showing her that in a sea of low value ass-kissing chumps you are the one prized high value man who is accustomed to interacting with girls of her level of beauty on a routine basis. some examples involve VERY. It may sound mean but women WANT to come off their pedestals to meet a high value man like yourself! Giving/Taking Value I made a post a while back by Mehow about giving value by being the value. She is accustomed to being put on a pedestal by guys staring at her. VERY subtle comments that could be taken as a backhanded compliment. It is not like you are calling the girl a “bitch” or saying she is “ugly”. For example. Do you think a rock star that is in town for a tour is going to barrage a girl he just met with a bunch of interview questions? What’s your name? What’s your age? Where are you from? What is your job? HELL NO! For him to ask such personal questions to a girl with them both knowing he will be in a different city the next day would be silly. He might bring up some stories about something crazy that happened at his last tour stop in New York City. 283 .

Mack Tight 284 . They begin by building comfort and attraction by telling interesting high value stories (such as the rock star’s crazy night at his NYC tour stop). A high status man has many options with quality women just as a quality woman has many options with low status men. It’s casual.COM Guys often interact with beautiful women by asking endless personal questions and they usually never end up seeing or talking to the girl EVER AGAIN anyway.The Best of TSBMAG. I also hope my examples gave you some ideas on how you can raise your status to women even higher. ONLY if the interaction progresses to the point that it EXCEEDS his normal standards does he care to learn the back of baseball card stats of a girl’s personal life. So there you go… I hope I did a good job of explaining high status to you. The key is that quality women only have limited opportunities to interact with truly high status men. So show them that you are high status from the start and you will make yourself the exception and not the norm. so it is completely worthless! High status men want to test women before they even care about their personal life.

I’m even boring myself!” then you know exactly what I’m talking about here. she was bound to be attracted to me. surprising and rewarding each other. Flirting is conversational play. seems to be enjoying her time with you. and while this proved an asset in my talks with “adults. it is issue number one amongst the clients with whom I work. But let’s learn how to flirt. if you never learned to communicate any other way. somehow. And listen. well. that’s fine – you’re in the company of many other men. surprise… it is how you might communicate with your lawyer or your professor. initially. If you’ve ever been talking to a woman and thought to yourself. I wasn’t exactly a huge hit around the college bars in Ann Arbor. pulling. so much as it is that they are worried the conversation will flatten out and get boring. While they may have some approach anxiety. hitting it with a bend.I was completely stilted when you’d throw me into a bar full of people my age. emotion. Flirting is YOU and HER – your personality and hers – sharing some basic information and making it more fun. it is not necessarily because they are afraid of getting rejected. A flat conversation is one without any spark. 285 . MI.Social Superstar Day 6 How to be a Good Flirt Written by Christian Hudson Originally Published 06/18/2008 I was a very boring guy until I turned about 22. and add some much-needed texture to the conversation. only to see her attention wane as the conversation starts to get. I thought that. lame. There’s nothing worse than a girl who. “man.”. Its two people talking about… anything they want (it definitely does not need to be logical)… and pushing. My interests used to lie exclusively in history. economics and business. The inability to be fun and flirtatious is one of the most common problems that men face when they’re learning to get better with women. I like to think of it as taking a flat note. To this day. once a girl sensed how deep and concerned about the real world I was. Needless to say.

I’ll tell you what it's like… (here you’re “headlining” what you’re going to say. ahhh. where are you from? Here. Swooosh – instant texture. uh… Stains.” to “that’s too hard” – we’ll use one of those in a later example). saying quietly)… but you can’t tell anyone else. You get the Silver Star. F: Stains… what’s that like? M: Ok. (Little reward for playing along).COM and running it through a flanger. It's just outside London. INTERESTING CONVERSATION F: So where are you from? M: Hmmmm. and probably not even as interesting. building up anticipation. and say) Promise? F: Ok. I’m from Stains. step back. London. but we’ve texturized it with some personality. You know. (Now. How about you. (Here you’re creating a little game – more fun) F: Ohhh. I’m from… guess where I’m from. Nope. But perhaps an example is in order. FUN. look her in the eye. We’ve made a little game 286 . BORING CONVO F: So where are you from? M: Right. (Note: there are about a million responses she could have here. F: Ok… how is it there? M: It’s pretty nice. M: Ohhh! So close. so check it out… What have we done here? We’ve conveyed the exact same information. M: Cool. ranging from “I don’t know. put your hand on her shoulder and lean into her ear. our man is relaying facts. Now. Key point: the girl is not having FUN sharing this information. DULL. it was a good place to grow up. promise. This conversation is as flat as a deflated blimp.The Best of TSBMAG. Let’s consider a few tweaks.

he was doing a lot better with the ladies. and the process of sharing information. 287 . Think Happy Californian Stoner/Surfer. but there’s no algorithm for knowing which – you just need to practice and develop a feel for it. tell you what… (thinking)… I’ll give you three options. our models of fun behavior and delivery are guys who are way over the top. This is literally the first question out of the mouth of every girl you meet here in NYC. shuts down the conversation.subtle frame control. it's made the conversation. so let’s consider another example… a girl asks you what you do. needless to say. about how to tell if the guy they’re talking to is going to treat them to Per Se dinners and weekends in the Hamptons. Too often. act gay. (She’s going to have to work harder than her lame ‘How to Separate the Duds from the Studs in NYC’ guidebook told her she would) F: I don’t know. There’s a whole mess of other things going on in here . I’m a…. It could be anything. 95% of the time. after coaching him on how to rock the second one. because I’m not being truthful. you’ll be golden.” which is obviously a lie and which. Ok. punished them for asking me about myself. there must be a book that girls receive when they move here. a lot more FUN. These exact conversation fragments happened with a boot camp client not long ago. (I wouldn’t play a “reward/punishment” game here if it's early in the conversation. and as long as your delivery includes some warmth and a smile. (And she’s not pleased about it!) M: Ok. guess what I do. I want to add too – you don’t have to be a dancing ape with your delivery on this one. One option was to say “Are you qualifying me already?” which girls usually take as offensive and which.but most importantly.Social Superstar of getting it out of you. I used to answer this question in one of two ways. as you’re getting away from the question at that point). That line works with certain girls. The other thing I’d say was something like “I’m a garbage man. or have some other presentation style that just smacks of “seduction community. So what’s a fun way to stand out when a girl asks you this question? F: So what do you do? M: Hmmm.” You can be totally chill. screening and qualifying .

that sounds good. fun. Here’s the flat. F: Haha. right… M: Option 3: I run a software company that builds security software for biotech firms who want to protect sensitive data from being stolen by insiders (sounds legit. interesting) F: Ahhh. exactly. right? But you’ve got the power of your copious intellect. M: Ok.e. it's time to ask the girl what she does. along with two hobbies. so I’m going to guess option 3. option 1… I run a beverage company that produces and markets caffeinated gelatin shots in little one ounce packets. the way that you present something like this may vary. This is a conversation I have. F: So you’re an entrepreneur! M: Yeah. and helps me avoid talking about the coaching stuff because I’ll steer it into talking about jello shots or software. you’re like… kind of right! You get partial credit! That deserves a hug. frequently almost verbatim. Damn. but no kiss on the cheek yet. M: Wow. described very interestingly. (Give her a little hug) F: Wait what do you mean partial credit? M: Well… I’ve actually done all three. boring version: 288 . And so on.The Best of TSBMAG. Of course. M: I know. Now. too complicated to be a lie) F: Okkkkkk… that’s tough. if you play guitar you could say “I’m a musician working to get his first breakthrough demo track laid down).COM F: Ok. (Lots of detail. described as if they were jobs (i. you’re wicked smart. ok… M: Option 2: I consult with men on their lifestyles and communications skills – kind of like Hitch – to help them meet cooler women and have better social lives (too ridiculous to be true – or is it?) F: hahahaha. one way you might want to present it is to throw in your job.

? M: Actually. OutOfHere. more texture. But it sounds exciting. Get. more playfulness. OutOfHere. uh… what’s that? I meet girls every day and they tell me they do something that I’ve never heard of.Social Superstar M: So what do you do? F: I’m a technical designer for Jill Sanders. some fun?” then you’ll find yourself flirting pretty effortlessly. no you’re NOT. I just don’t have anything good to relate. makes a girl feel much better about sharing information with you. How’d you get into sales? See? Creating this playful tension. (Smiling as if she just made your day when she told you that) F: Wait. M: Ok. We’ve barely scratched the surface in terms of all the techniques you can use to flirt. no you’re NOT. I’m just messing with ya. Tell me about it. Same information. So what can you do with that?! Well… M: So what do you do? F: I’m a technical designer for Jill Sanders M: Wait a minute. I have no idea what a technical designer is (both laugh). She has FUN telling it to you because the conversation itself is a little series of surprises. And ultimately. Let’s consider another example. More often than not. why (she’s probably smiling now too)…. 289 . this is what flirting is all about. immediately. But if the attitude you take with you into your interactions is “what would give this conversation some texture. (Smiling as if she just made your day when she told you that) F: Wait. this texture. why (she’s probably smiling now too)…. to what a girl does.? M: Ah. Get. but with a more common job: M: So what do you do? F: I’m a sales representative for [insert big faceless company here] M: Wait a minute.

Yes. are you guys friendly?. The best approaches are spontaneous. But there are perfect ways to approach and deliver your opening line. You’re mentally in the wrong state.. fail proof. Personally. But the fact is. make you look cool.COM Day 7 Simple steps for Successfully Approaching and Opening Women Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/19/2008 I think most guys are waiting for some new pick. Most of the times these girls will be expecting you to open 290 . The reason these approaches are the best is because very little thought is going into the interaction. Once you start scanning your mind for things to say it's over. Don’t hold your breath. ideally it will make her laugh. This is why in the beginning a lot of coaches recommend using canned openers. and create conversation that just flows from it. I recommend having a couple canned openers ready for different situations… but I would keep them simple (hey. Proximity. guaranteed to work opening line to say to a woman. An opener is just the first thing you say to start an interaction. 1. there is no perfect opener. When it comes to opening girls I’ve found that several things will make all the difference.The Best of TSBMAG.up artist to come out with an innovative.) and stay away from the classic Mystery or Strauss “who lies more” or “what 80’s pop duo should I name my dog after?” I’ve found that guys who are using these elaborate canned openers are getting stuck in routine mode and not going on to develop natural conversation skills. The less thought out and planned an interaction is the more natural and relaxed you will appear. The easiest girls to talk to are the ones you're standing closest to. BAM! You see a woman you want to talk to an immediately initiate a conversation. But that's just my opinion.

If you’ve entered a bar. if you get a tad resistance. The best approaches feel spontaneous. This will put you in the right frame of mind. (And build social value) them immediately. 5. Even if you just say “you girls look like you’re ready for a fun night” give them cheers with your glass and then go back to talking to your friend. 2. On the other hand. You don’t want to be the guy doing laps all night with the hungry look on his face. Now they’re opened. You have to differentiate between a girl who visibly giving you signals of disinterest… and the girls that just take a little more work. As you walk into a venue scan the room for the best possible spot.The reason spontaneous approaches work the best is because your body language doesn’t have time to get all weird and up tight.Once you’ve approached and opened girls keep a really fun vibe. Remember not all girls are super outgoing… some girls need a little prying before they open up. don't prematurely eject. and is probably bored. Know when to eject and when not to. The longer you wait the more awkward it's going to be.Social Superstar them. Open as many people around you as quickly as you can. and you’re in the proximity to a couple girls you want to talk to. That is the beauty of the three second rule. I hope that these tips help next time you’re out. I see too many guys open a girl with a funny line… then immediately go into “interview mode. Because the approach was spontaneous you will be sending off really natural body language.If you open a girl and the whole time you’re talking to her she’s fumbling with her cell phone and avoiding eye contact… don’t waste your time.” Once you’re in interview mode she knows you’re hitting on her. Bobby 291 . Spontaneous. 4. You also want to present the image that you could turn and walk away at any time. You want to make sure your body language conveys the image that this interaction carries no excess value to you. Stay Fun. Body Language. There are entire books on approaching but sometimes it's the simplest advice that is most practical and easy to implement. You’re better off staying playful for awhile.

How do you get a girl to invest some interest in the conversation? One of the easiest ways to elicit a response is to make assumptions about her and funny guesses. I’m a finance geek. For instance. Here she brought up the emotions she felt of excitement mixed with fear.” “So tell me what your first week in the city was really like” I asked her. After you’ve approached a woman and have broken the ice with an opening line… you need to hook her into the conversation.. 292 . She told me she just moved here from Iowa. You need to get her to invest some interest in talking to you. and I asked her if she lived in the city. you’re here because as a child you had bright lights big city dreams… you imagined yourself strolling down Fifth Ave. swinging your briefcase on your way to your job in advertising…” At this point she stopped me and said… “Ha-ha.COM Day 8 Improving Your Conversation Skills Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 06/20/2008 The goal of a conversation is to connect with the other person on some level. actually I imagined it was a job on Wall St.The Best of TSBMAG.” “So you imagined yourself in a power suit… doing lunches with the Gordon Gekko types. The standard question that most guys would have asked next was “how do you like the city?” Instead I said. When that thread died down it was easy to transition into another interesting topic. I guided her along. “So.. Using the material she gave me “the mix of excitement and fear” I was able to transition into another thread. the other night I was talking to a girl at a bar. talking about how Intel is down a point?” From there the conversation flowed naturally because I avoided interview mode..

.. If you’re listening to her you’ll notice a new hook every time she opens her mouth.. (Leaving Iowa.. and how it almost brings you back your childhood when things were still new… and you had that desire to explore.. The key to being a good conversationalist is to keep your ears open for hooks.” We were able to smoothly transition from “Do you live in the City?” to having a detailed conversation about our most adventurous vacations. arriving in NY. When she told me she just moved here from Iowa a month ago she gave me three hooks to work off of.. do tell!” See how the conversation is naturally flowing from one thread to another? After she spoke a bit about her adventure in France I told her about my first time in Brazil. out of money” “Oh. so what do you do? her: I’m a stock broker me: where do you usually hangout? 293 . yes… being stuck in France not speaking a word of the language. The biggest mistakes guys make is turning the conversation into an interview… take the conversation above and see how easily it could have headed into interview mode: • • • • • me: Do you live in the city? her: I just moved here from Iowa me: Oh yea. her first month here) Each time she gives you a hook you should relate it back to her establishing a connection. It was probably one where you challenged yourself a bit…” “Haha.. A hook is something she says that you can use to extend the conversation.Social Superstar “Well aren’t the most satisfying times in life the times you feel that adrenaline? It's like when you think of your most memorable vacation… it probably wasn’t a vacation you sat in a beach chair sipping Pina Coladas. that sounds like a good story. and explained the emotion I felt of “being lost on this entirely different continent...

. • • • • • me: Do you live in the city? her: I just moved here from Iowa me: Really. 3. I dabbled with stocks online a little.COM See how easily the conversation could have turned into a high pressured interview if I hadn’t used what she gave me and related it back to her. What do you do? her: I’m a stockbroker. You also want to stay away from “try hard” relating. This simple acknowledgement let her know that: 1. her: It was this time in France when I was dead broke. So what does one do when they know no one will find out? • See how I acknowledged the emotion that she must have been feeling. Who cares that your friend went there on vacation? The proper way to handle a hook is to relate it back to her. 294 . me: Oh yea. • • me: tell me about your most adventurous vacation. That I was genuinely curious to know what one does when they know no one is watching. Here is an example from my conversation of how I took things deeper. and alone for two days wondering around Paris. That I was able to empathize and understand her. didn’t speak the language. This is where everything she says you try to find away to immediately relate to it. I have a friend who went there on vacation last year.The Best of TSBMAG. What do you do for fun? In the example above you’re wasting valuable hooks by trying to fill the air with pointless banter about yourself. I was really listening to her. This is actually a technique I learned from Richard La Ruina’s book The Natural Art of Seduction where he talks about taking things deeper. me: So you must have felt both the thrill and fear of complete anonymity. 2.

If you get in this habit you will naturally become a better conversationalist. and then practice acknowledging the hooks. She knows that you’re not superficially trying to relate… This is a conversational strategy you should take on no matter who you are talking to. The easiest way to break an old habit is to consistently implement a new one. Many of us have old habits that we’re going to have to break. Practice picking out the hooks these people are giving you. Instead of waiting for attractive girls to practice this new conversational strategy I would suggest practicing it with your friends. and coworkers.Social Superstar Once you’ve acknowledged what she has given you it is alright to relate the story to yourself. Because now she knows that you’re on the same playing field. family. 295 .

COM Day 9 How to Build Comfort with a Girl Written by T Originally Published: 06/23/2008 Bobby Rio asked me to shed some light on building comfort with women. If there’s any possible doubt as to your status versus her status. Eventually though as you get more comfortable with your inner game and alpha role. however. This is just a sampler of techniques you can use to build comfort with women and isn’t meant to be an exhaustive list by any means. physical appearance.The Best of TSBMAG. however. sure you can compliment a woman upon first meeting her. Until you reach that level of game. Or to put it another way. which is the moment of interaction at the bar or club. My answer is…it depends on your conveyed status. the easier it will get to convey that you’re an alpha male and a prize with hardly any effort. Picture yourself as 296 . you will probably want to lean more toward indirect game and playful teasing and insults. Daytime Drills One of the biggest problems men have with building comfort with women is that they put too much emphasis on the moment of truth. which is even higher. One of my rules has always been that it’s all right to put a woman on a pedestal so long as it’s made clear that you’re on the throne. social proofing and/or manner of speech are strong enough to convey higher value from the moment you walk in the door or open your mouth. it’s always better to start in the beginning with a little more indirect game and use playful negging and teasing to bring down your target’s status in relation to your status. If your body language. I hope you guys enjoy it and find it helpful. The more comfortable you get with your game. Two things I hear guys ask about when it comes to building comfort with women are (1) whether to go indirect versus direct with the game and (2) whether to compliment or playfully insult the woman. treating a woman like a queen is not a sign of weakness as long as it’s crystal clear that you’re the king. you want to get skilled at knowing how and when to use compliments and direct game as well as using negs and indirect game.

Social Superstar an athlete. Women’s defenses tend to be down more in these casual daytime situations than they are in a bar or nightclub where they are more guarded due to being hit on incessantly. You’d do visualization exercises. The same applies for building comfort with women: practice when it doesn’t count and when no one is watching and you’ll be way more confident and perform much better during game time. It’s not enough to make a note on what doesn’t work for the sake of avoiding repeating the mistake. Aim for 30 seconds. You’d take shot after shot after shot in your spare time. And by the time you hit the big game you’d feel a lot less pressure on yourself because you mentally prepared yourself for this moment. Imagine how nervous you’d be. Don’t fall into that trap. In fact. but you never practice or touch a basketball except during big games in front of a large amount of people. With these drills. Imagine how off your game would be. take mental notes on what works and what doesn’t. Start a conversation every day with a different attractive woman. Then go for a minute. Ask a woman for her opinion on a cologne or article of clothing you’re considering buying when you’re shopping at the department store. say a basketball player. The whole goal is to get comfortable talking to women you don’t know. Chat with a cute bank teller while she’s handling business for you. go for five minutes. You’d never do that. and forget to ever repeat that joke or story again. You’d practice by yourself for hours when nothing is on the line and not a lot of people are watching. Make small talk with the Starbucks barista when waiting for your coffee. You’d run drills. pat themselves on the back for it. You achieve that. The point is to get comfortable starting conversations with women and to get comfortable with the occasional rejection. you don’t have to get a number or pick a woman up. so you’ll experience less rejection and more responsiveness than you would in a nightspot. When you do these daily conversations in the beginning you’re just aiming to get used to the banter and to reduce the anxiety you get from having conversations with women. If you’re stuck on a long post office line behind an attractive woman. the more you get rejected. When you do this. A cramped subway car is an opportunity. it’s even more important to make notes on what does work so that you can repeat it and fine-tune it. For some reason a lot of guys make a joke or tell a story that works brilliantly in a conversation. that’s an opportunity for conversation. the more you realize that it won’t kill you and that 297 . A woman sitting next to you on a bus reading a book you’ve already read is an opportunity.

you can joke about what a 95 lb. Avoid it at all costs. Once you get used to doing your daily daytime drills and getting comfortable starting and maintaining conversations with women. Don’t do it. First. never sound desperate to please. It works great because (a) it’s genuinely funny when done right and (b) it points out one of your strengths yet comes off less obnoxious and approval-seeking than outright bragging. don’t apologize for who you are and don’t be afraid to offend. I’ll give an example of this. But outside of that exception. I’m not going to focus on openers and how to start conversations with women. Then they start over apologizing. then you should apologize. Then you need to focus on using your body language to convey the alpha male impression you want to convey. if you step on her foot or spill a drink on her. They are so afraid of not getting her approval that they almost beg for it. A woman busts their balls a little bit and they backtrack or apologize immediately. muscular physique. be playful. Nightlife Comfort Since this article is supposed to be about building comfort. and tease her like she’s your little sister. I’m going to focus on how to build comfort with a woman once you’re already in conversation with her. Of course use your discretion. Second. you’ll see your bar or nightclub game improve dramatically. A friend of mine. Don’t use self-deprecating humor.COM it’s not the end of the world. Don’t apologize. Stick to your guns.The Best of TSBMAG. Beethoven. weakling you are. but never at your own expense. because both those tendencies are obstacles to building comfort. There are plenty of other articles out there about that. avoid self-deprecation or anything that lowers your status. Make her laugh. When many guys come across a pretty woman. Be cocky. Then you’ll want to get used to observing and interpreting body language. The conversation started out well 298 . Apologizing for your actions is the right thing to do under some circumstances. There is one exception to the self-deprecating humor rule: you can use selfdeprecating humor if it’s blatantly insincere and actually points out one of your strengths: for example. the anxiety kicks in and they start getting flustered easily. And that alone is important. recently approached two women at a bar. if you have an athletic. Apologizing for who you are and what you believe however is a no-no.

Beethoven responded “We were just discussing how many fat girls there are here tonight. But Beethoven stuck to his guns. If she is passionate about fashion and works in the field. And you never. she is going to want to start getting to know you and building rapport with you. By never sounding desperate to please and never apologizing for who you are. and even worse. but at some point one of the girls asked Beethoven what he and his friends were discussing earlier. they go overboard and do it for too long. even playfully. even if it’s within the bar or club. He just looked her up and down and said “Whatever. why does it bother you? It’s not like you have anything to worry about looking the way you do” and just kept going with the conversation. Good rule of thumb is to be careful about negging about political stances. Not only did he turn that potential negative into a positive. changing locations gives the psychological 299 . instead of making the situation better. ever want to tease a girl about a topic related to her core values. Third. put her in a position of dominance. She said “That’s not very nice” and seemed disgusted. If he apologized. but you do want to dial it down as you build more and more rapport with the girl. don’t mock her chosen field as frivolous or stupid. he ended up hooking up with her. you earn their respect and set the foundation for building more comfort. don’t tease or playfully insult her favorite cause or ideology. know when to stop negging and teasing so much. it would have just highlighted the awkwardness. which would have made her uncomfortable. which would make her lose respect for him. move around from place to place. you risk coming off as a real obnoxious prick. they will feel uncomfortable around you. and if they do not respect you. For some reason. If she’s heavily into church. as these tend to represent a person’s core values and insulting these. chosen careers and religious beliefs. Women do not respect a man they can easily dominate or make uncomfortable. often does more harm than good Fourth. If she’s passionate about politics and is involved in certain causes. You should keep playful tone and never stop teasing totally. And then it goes from being cute and charming to just smug. Once you start winning a woman over and she is warming up to you. Sometimes when guys get really good at the negging and teasing and see the initial results it gets them. If you just keep negging and teasing at the same level you were when you first started building comfort with her. didn’t backtrack and didn’t apologize.” His target’s jaw dropped and she was absolutely mortified.Social Superstar enough. don’t mock religion. annoying and dickish.

Or on the flip side. take her to the dance floor later. but it’s not that hard. such as going from one bar to a second bar to lounge to a diner…bouncing around like that gives the psychological impression to a girl that she’s just spent three or four mini-dates with you and she’ll feel more comfort with you than if you spent that exact same amount of time talking to her rooted to one spot. A conversation will get stale quickly and turn into the foundation for a friend zone relationship if you never touch her during the conversation. Fifth. With ex-es. don’t overdo it. Sixth. I’m not going to go into the specifics of playful touching here. You don’t want to come off as hyperactive and spastic and moving around every 30 seconds. may start venting and getting worked up and then start transferring her issues with her ex 300 . Moving around from venue to venue also helps build comfort. while it’s cool to playfully bring up sex. In the pickup community they call it “Kino. you’ve just guaranteed yourself a place in the friend zone. These things can backfire too easily if you don’t know what you’re doing. really. the more time she feels like she’s spent with you and the more comfortable she feels. Take her to another end of the bar and introduce her to some your friends. do not dwell too deeply into conversation about ex's (hers or yours) and specific approaches toward sex. The more locations a woman associates with you.COM impression that you are spending more time together and bonding more. As with anything. 10 minutes later take her to some couches to sit down. and suddenly the attraction mood is dead and you’re on the road to becoming her emotional tampon as she drones on and on about how much feelings she has for him. if within a bar. but it works. lead her to a spot at the bar and order drinks. But there’s also the risk that she may end up talking about him at length and getting nostalgic about him and talking about how much she still loves him. Then go to another part of the bar. but you can find tons of Kino-related articles by Bobby and Mike right here on the TSB Magazine I’m sure. For example. it can end up being a light. which are very important when building comfort. she may have a lot of unresolved anger toward him. If you know how to dance. make sure to touch her whenever you can. It’s an illusion. Getting the balance of touching just right so that you don’t come off either too timid or too aggressive takes some trial and error.The Best of TSBMAG. Light. If you build comfort without building attraction at the same time. harmless conversation.” but it’s something my friend and I always made sure to do before we ever knew what it was called. playful touching conveys sexual interest and builds attraction and sexual tension.

301 . Needless to say. this isn’t an exhaustive list when it comes to building comfort. she’ll be very cognizant about coming off like a slut to a guy she barely knows and may say something like “I don’t have sex with a guy until three or four months of dating. With women. You’ll start believing you have no shot of building much comfort anytime soon. Unlike men. With men. why guys fear commitment. even if she gets insanely attracted and comfortable with you later in that same conversation. she’s going to feel obligated to stick to her original conservative statement for fear of looking like a hypocrite or liar. thinking that making her talk about her shitty ex would be a great way to sell myself as a positive alternative. if you never asked about sex at all things could have happened much more spontaneously. but I think it’s a pretty good foundation. I made this mistake with a woman once. now that she’s verbally committed to that. As I mentioned before. And regarding bringing up specific approaches toward sex. why guys hurt women…I ended up being her convenient target for everything she hated about men. who in this case would be you. And on her end. By asking her such a specific sexual questions too early before she’s built comfort and rapport with you. you’ll get a totally different answer than you would if you asked her that same question later on when you have her on an emotional high. Instead I spent the night fielding angry questions about why guys cheat. to change their minds you must change their emotions. Meanwhile. to change their minds you must change their logic. women’s attitudes change wildly with their emotional states.Social Superstar specifically and men in general toward the next closest male target. it’s going to mentally psyche you out and make you behave less aggressively in your comfort building. here’s an example of how that can backfire. If a woman hasn’t built much attraction and comfort with you yet and you ask her what her attitude is about how soon is too soon to have sex.” Now that you’ve made her explicitly give a sexual timetable. Hope it helps some of you out there. and I have to get to know him very well first. it wasn’t a great comfort-building conversation.

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Day 10 Being Funnier – Make it fun!
Written by Barry Kirkey Originally Published: 06/24/2008

Every woman likes a positive man, and often, positivity takes the form of a good sense of humor. The problem with giving anyone advice about how to become funnier, is that humor is universally subjective. Meaning, every culture, sub-culture or individual decides what is funny on their own. Yeah there are exceptions, people can be told by popular media what they think is funny, but you’re not one of those people because you’re reading this article. Here are some things you can do to become funnier, in chronological order: First, find out what you like. A sense of humor is as unique as your own DNA (simile). They are usually a complex combination of joke types, body language, interest in shows/movies, and so forth. This step should normally be a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised at how so many people dislike comedy. Once you find out what you like, expose yourself to it. Watch those shows and movies that you love. Watch them alone or with friends and family. Learn how to laugh out loud when you watch them, even if you’re by yourself. I would caution you, however, not to “force it down,” meaning if you’re not in the mood to watch a comedy show (sitcoms, late night, etc.) then don’t watch it. If you have the problem of never being in the mood then you need to find out why this is the case. Note: If you’re never in the mood to laugh, you may have other issues that are keeping you down. I suggest you speak to a psychologist, doctor or other professional that can determine why your mood is always down. You might be surprised to learn about what prevents you from doing what you love. This can be something as serious as depression or anxiety. However, it can also mean that you’re still, subconsciously, dealing with unresolved matters in your life (such as, a fight with your dad 6 months ago and you haven’t talked to him since). After enough exposure, you’re ready to take it to the field. Try to avoid copying other jokes directly – those Borat impressions are no longer

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funny, so don’t do them. Unless you’re a naturally funny guy – then you can get away with it, but that’s a whole different article. If you must copy, use a variation of what you’ve learned instead. For example, if you want to do a Seinfeld joke, don’t just start quoting the show. Do your worst and most annoying Seinfeld voice and exaggerate a Seinfeld-type joke as much as you can. Make it ridiculous and unexpected. While all this is going, laugh at your own jokes. Laugh as much as you can and absorb the criticism of others by laughing even more. Here’s why: Laughing is infectious. The more you laugh, the more others around you are likely to laugh as well. Not only that, but let’s consider the whole theory of conditioning by association. If you’re consistently around the same people, doing jokes often, and laughing often, people will associate you with laughter. When this happens, you’ve won the game – you’re known as “the funny guy.” “But Mr. fuckface (me)! How do I use this to get girls!?” Just by statistics, most people end up in quality relationships through other people that you already know (i.e., in the office, friend of a friend or family member). So you get the immediate benefit of being “the funny” guy in your own social circle that way. “But Mr. faggittface (me)! What about girls you don’t know?!” Okay, that’s definitely more difficult, but not impossible. With cold approaches, first impressions are the only thing you have, so make it count. Start off with the best jokes you have, make sure you laugh and you smile. If she looks down on you, make a friendly insult, “wow – someone dropped their funny basket in the toilet today!” and walk on to the next person. If you end up forced into a situation with someone who doesn’t respect your humor then this is particularly challenging, because you can potentially make an enemy without knowing it. Similar to what happened with Darth Vador, it’s difficult to turn someone from being your enemy to your friend, but not impossible. I won’t go into this situation now, because that is a discussion for those who are already polished and comfortable with their own sense of humor… Dun dun dun! Anal.

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Day 11 Mastering the Art of Push-Pull and Cocky-Funny
Written by The Asian Rake Originally Published: 06/25/2008

Do You Want Faster and More Powerful Seductions? How the 80/20 Principle applies to Push-Pull and Cocky-Funny? We’ve all heard about the 80/20 principle first developed by Vilfredo Pareto in the context of the distribution of income and wealth. My experience and observations have shown that the 80/20 rule applies just as well to push-pull and cocky-funny. After closely observing naturals who are masters at crazily rapid escalations and seductions, and after a lot of discussions with PUAs who have really tight game, I’ve discovered an important enhancement to the simplistic push-pull and cocky-funny concepts. This small bit of finetuning can shave a lot of time off your seductions and create much stronger, closer emotional connections. Here’s my thesis statement (yes, I’m an academic, lol): If you want to seduce a woman faster and have her more powerfully attracted to you, the optimal mix for a man who already has his fundamentals down (his body language, tonality, and basic inner game) and is interacting with a confident and attractive woman is 80% pull, 20% push. I’m not going to be too strict about the numbers. But more accurately, the optimal combination depends on how good the man’s fundamentals are and how confident the woman is. It’s a continuum with the upper end of the continuum being 80-20 pull-push. My experience has also been that pull-push is best mixed with humor. Plus, the pull and the push are opposite manifestations of cockiness. With push, you are cocky enough to think that you are too good for the girl, so you push her away. With pull, you are cocky enough to think that you are irresistible to her and to women in general, and you want her, so you pull her in. Although there is plenty to say about this combination of push-pull and cocky-funny, I’ll leave that to another article. My focus here is on the

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80/20 principle applied to the push-pull dynamic. I’ll assume here that it’s obvious that push-pull is closely connected to cocky-funny. For the classic book on push-pull, see Swingcat’s ebook, Real World Seduction. For cocky-funny, the best authority is David DeAngelo. Check out his ebook, Double Your Dating, and his DVD series, Cocky Comedy. I assume at least familiarity with push-pull and cocky-funny as described in these resources. Christian Hudson and Nick Sparks over at The Social Man are about to release a product that incorporates all the concepts in Swingcat and David D.’s books and then takes it all to another level. Watch at their site for the release. We’re good friends, so I’m a little biased, but you can go over there and check it out for yourself: What I say here is NOT for absolute newbie's, who don’t yet have their fundamentals down (body language, tonality, and basic inner game). If you still don’t know what good BL&T looks, sounds, and feels like, stop reading this and figure that out first. My point here applies to elite game. It’s for guys who want to know what it’s like to live in the top 10%, or higher, of men in this world. That’s not to say this is advanced. It’s just not for beginners. A quickie definition of push-pull straight from the pen of Swingcat: “Push-Pull is whenever you emotionally push a woman away from you and, then, emotionally pull her back in. Each Push creates an emotional space for each Pull.” We’ll be filling this out as we go along. Now let’s unpack the thesis statement. While you can succeed using almost any combination of push and pull (e.g., 80% push-20% pull, 50% push-50% pull), the combination that will generate the fastest seductions and most powerful connections is 80-20 pull-push or in other words, 80% pull-20% push. This is true only if the following also hold: a. The man has good fundamentals (good body language, tonality, tight inner game and is hence non-needy, etc.). This also applies if he is physically attractive or is perceived by the woman to have high social value. b. The woman is unusually attractive in the man’s eyes, and she is confident about her value and attractiveness. This relates to Believability. She needs to be able to be confident enough in her self-worth to accept your advances.

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If both those elements are in place, then the fastest and most powerful route to sex is a mix of 80% pull-20% push. [CAVEAT: If the man only has average fundamentals and the woman is only of average confidence in her own attractiveness and value, then the optimal mix is further down the continuum and closer to 50-50 pushpull. This is because pulling a woman closer to you emotionally is only effective when you already have a basic level of attraction from the woman. Of course, we all know that this kind of attraction is largely independent of one’s physical appearance. Over 90% of this kind of attraction is attributable to body language and tonality alone. That’s why I call these the fundamentals. Your attitude and outlook are also crucial to pulling off the right BL&T, so I include inner game as a factor for the sake of completeness.] Pushing a woman away is effective when a woman looks at you and doesn’t expect you to be cocky. It throws her off and is hence funny. It’s like when a precocious child talks like an adult, using mature and sophisticated vocabulary, sentence structure, etc. It’s unexpected and incongruent with the kid’s image, and hence, kind of funny, and if done right, it’s admirable. Now imagine a 50 year old, sophisticated-looking man talking the same way. It’s not funny anymore. It’s just normal and expected. Similarly, when a below average looking guy uses a lot of push cockyfunny, talking as if he’s too good for her and using humorous sarcasm, it’s attractive because the woman begins to wonder, “How can this guy be so cocky? He must have something going for him that I can’t see yet. I’m interested.” And because it’s done in a comedic way, she’s not offended, but rather, intrigued. Now if a guy who has his fundamentals down (good BL&T), a goodlooking guy, or a guy perceived to have high value starts to push her away emotionally, she’s not intrigued. Why? Because it’s obvious why this guy is so cocky. He’s good-looking, high-value, or has an attractive personality. It’s not funny anymore because it’s expected and congruent with his image. He just comes across cocky. For a guy like this to use cocky-funny, he has to really emphasize the humor and really cut down on the cocky part.

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Most people overlook the fact that David D. himself acknowledged this in one of his newsletters: "If you’re a pretty good looking guy, you might turn down the cocky, and turn up the funny. Women perceive good-looking guys who act cocky as MAJOR PLAYERS, and too much cocky too soon can backfire on you.” More accurately, this isn’t just true for guys who are good-looking. If your fundamentals are strong, or you’re perceived as high-value, then it applies just as well to you. It’s the push dynamic that makes these high-value or good-looking guys come across as too unattainable. For guys like this, it’s best to use the pull dynamic more often and save the push dynamic for that 20% of dramatic contrast. And obviously, when a guy with good fundamentals, attractive appearance, or high social value is perceived as a “major player,” it is very bad for his Believability. You can do it the opposite way, of course. You can do mainly push and just a little pull, like 80% push and 20% pull. Or you can be very cocky and only a little funny. Sure, you can get success that way, too. But for the most part, if your fundamentals are already strong, then: 1) You can get much faster seductions by pulling her in more often than you can by pushing her away. 2) You can get the girl to feel a deeper emotional bond with you by pulling more often than pushing. Here’s why: 1. If your fundamentals are good, then you will be a relatively DOMINANT, powerful, and confident man. Hence, girls (and most people in general) will naturally feel like following your lead. So when you tell a girl to sit down, she will feel a strong social and emotional pull to sit down. When you’re emotionally pulling a girl in by telling her to kiss you, she will have to work extra hard to resist. Most girls like a strong, dominant, powerful, confident guy, and many girls have the fantasy of “being taken” by such a man. Any resistance they give to such a man is just token.


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Thus, if you already have good fundamentals (BL&T and basic inner game), and you want to shave massive amounts of time off your seductions, you’re better off pulling the girl in more frequently than pushing her away because the chances are good she will give in more often than not. Ah, but Asian Rake, when you push a girl away, doesn’t she want to pull you in? Isn’t that the whole point of pushing her away? So you can get her to chase you? Yes, to a certain extent, this is true. That’s why you SHOULD STILL PUSH. That’s the all-important 20%. In fact, by pulling most of the time, when you do finally push her away, it’ll feel that much more powerful to her. If you’re a dominant guy, girls will feel pressure to follow your orders, and unless she’s very dominant herself, chances are good that she will NOT pull you in return every time you push her away. Chances are good that if you are a dominant man, when you push her further away, she will follow your lead and remain further away. Assuming the pushes and pulls are of about equal emotional intensity (that’s one variable I’m leaving out here), if you PULL more often than not, she might resist you at first, but then because you’re dominant, she’ll follow your lead and move closer to you emotionally and physically. If you PUSH more often than not, she might resist you at first, but then because you’re a dominant guy, she’ll follow your lead and move further away from you emotionally and physically. Sure you can generate attraction with most combinations of push-pull. But what’s faster to sex? When she’s emotionally and physically closer to you, or when she’s emotionally and physically farther from you? It should be obvious. This is how the best naturals I’ve seen get bathroom lays in less than 15 minutes. It’s pull-pull-pull-pull-PUSH-pull-pull-pull-PUSH-pull-pull-pull to the bathroom. 2. By pulling more often than pushing, you can also create the deep emotional connections much faster.

make fun of her. “Wow. helpfully lays it all out in his Double Your Dating: I’m going to play hard to get. I know that she loves a guy that is so sarcastic that it makes her nervous. “Wow. Btw. be indifferent towards her. David D. A far more efficient way to develop emotional connections is to pull her in emotionally. how can she possibly feel an emotional connection? This should be obvious. Now let’s add the COCKY-FUNNY into the mix. this guy really. What exactly do I mean by Push Cocky-Funny vs. and generally bust her balls as much as possible.” And of course. I’m going to blow her off and make her prove to me that she wants me… so I can reject her again. however. One very effective kind of pull technique is in conjunction with screening and qualifying. When you stack enough of these. For instance. but this is one of the easiest to do. you are really adventurous. probably the best way to illustrate what I mean is through examples. I like that.” said in response to her little adventure story. of course. so I’m going to really keep the heat on… and when she starts to show any interest at all on the outside. this is also a key technique for creating the kind of emotional connections that will get girls to fall in love with you FAST. like sharing secrets and using childhood regression. PUSH COCKY-FUNNY The prime proponent of this is David D. she’ll want to open herself up and continue connecting with you. sincerely likes me for my special qualities. truly. She’ll be saying to herself. Let’s first talk about the internal mindset behind Push Cocky-Funny. There are others. Pull Cocky-Funny? Once again. she’ll feel like you really appreciate her for her unique qualities. If your Believability game is good then every qualification is actually a pull.Social Superstar If you’re continually pushing her away emotionally. 309 . is a great example of a pull.

I never thought I’d be plugging David D. David D. I’ll turn to her and say in a completely serious voice. 310 . which is just about the only place in the club where you can talk without speaking right into her ear. You’re driving me crazy. First tell me where you’re from.” PULL COCKY-FUNNY This is my default style of cocky-funny. and body language. you’ll be pushing her away a lot more than you’ll be pulling her in. so I’ll give you one of my own examples. but you’re better off reading his eBook or watching his DVD series Cocky Comedy. I could go on forever. (Pull #2) HB (breaking out laughing): Where are you from? Me: From? It doesn’t matter. like if I’m standing next to a girl at a bar. with a sigh and a love-sick puppy dog look.COM You notice that with this mindset.” they’re thinking this kind of cocky-funny. Me: OMG! (Then. which is what I call. LOL. When most guys think “cocky-funny. This took place near the coat check of a huge nightclub. A super cute. (Pull #3) HB (laughing): No way.The Best of TSBMAG. I want your number. long-haired beauty walks by.’s materials. “Push Cocky-Funny. tonality. “What are you doing at a bar for god sakes? Can’t you find a nice normal guy? Or are you desperate?” All with a completely straight face. as if he needs to sell any more. I say after lowering my hands) I’m in love with you… Give me your number. It should be a crime for you to walk in public. just look at you. follows this up with some now classic examples: I do crazy things. I learned from a natural friend that this sort of thing is best done when you’re a bit over the top or dramatically exaggerated in what you say and in your facial expressions. and I jump in front of her with my hands slightly extended in front of my chest in a “stopping” motion with my palms out. (Pull #1) HB (shocked): Huh? Are you crazy? Why? Me (with an incredulous look on my face): Why? I mean. “Will you PLEASE stop touching me?” And then look them right in the eye. Wow. Or say.

you’re making me really nervous. That was 5 pulls to 1 push. My hands are all cold and sweaty. … guess. “enlightened seduction. We’re getting a divorce… But I’m keeping the DVDs. There are many other tales to recount about naturals such as him. I take her hand in mine). see the LR that features my first encounter with NaturalMD:. as my natural friends have shown. I texted her about an hour later. (Push #1) HB laughed. (Then. I don’t even think that push was necessary. Me (perking up and letting out a sly smile): Okay.” 311 . Me (throwing off her hand and looking shocked): Are you calling me a liar? I’ve just confessed my deep dark love for you. (Pull #5) HB laughed. Another great example comes from Zan. check the mASF archives or google. asking what I was doing tomorrow… But that’s for another LR. Me (stepping out in front of her again and knowing that she’s just teasing and wants me to chase her): No. You can have the dog. You’ll have to check back for those. HB: Um. and she texted back. You can’t go. and now you’re calling me a liar? That’s it. HB (laughs): Okay. I’ll be so sad… I’m going to go home and cry now (and then I slumped my shoulders as if completely sad and depressed).” and started walking off. Here. club bathroom sex. We talked a little bit more. The one push came after 4 pulls. some of which you can find elsewhere on my site and some of which I might write about in the future. (Pull #4) HB (laughing): You’re not nervous.Social Superstar Me: Okay. China? Me: Pretty close… (Taking a step closer to her so that we’re inches apart. I said nothing and continued looking fake-mad. In fact. feel. and then I let her go back to her friends.) You know. HB said (with a smile): “Okay. bye. wait. If you haven’t read any of his materials yet. This sort of Pull Cocky-Funny can get you super fast make outs and. Zan is probably the best representative of this kind of cockyfunny. For an example of a fast make out. give me your number. Among the community oldtimers. I say in a quieter tone. Notice the push-pull ratio here.

do you? ZAN: Of course not! Wouldn’t be the same if I did. As if she had never resisted me in the first place. Both can work. and pick up right where I left off. smile and wink. her boyfriend objections (or whatever) mean nothing to me. no problem. but this conversation of his has stuck in my mind for a while now: ZAN: Come out with me for a drink tonight. I never. ZAN: I want to see you. Tell me your number and I’ll remember it.COM There are so many possibilities to choose from. tonality. He’s cocky because he believes that she’d be crazy to turn him down. So there you have it. Push Cocky-Funny vs. ZAN: Oh. sweetie. Zan pulls her in about seven times. and basic inner game). around 80%-20% is ideal. But if you have good fundamentals (body language. I have two bottles of champagne at home. HER: I can’t. HER: No! I told you last time I have a boyfriend. My boyfriend wouldn’t like it. In other words. ZAN: (smile. I will pick you up at 7. And keep it all funny. or you’re good-looking. I immediately go up to her. and you are interacting with a confident and attractive woman. Just about everything he says is a pull. ever worry about a woman’s resistance to me. 312 .The Best of TSBMAG. I understand… let’s make it 8 then. or you have high perceived social value. I suppose not… I find this whole exchange completely charming and hilarious. ZAN: Oh hey. ZAN: (big smile) Hello. If she says she is not interested and leaves. This is the ideal kind of frame to be operating from when doing Pull Cocky-Funny. so you’re still seeing Norman? HER: Uh… his name’s not Norman. would it? HER (laughing) No. Did you miss me? HER: Hardly. wink) Really? That’s very interesting. So her objections don’t even register with him. Pull Cocky-Funny. HER: No thanks. ZAN: One to drink and one to pour all over your body… HER: You never give up. But if I ever see her again. then you can get faster seductions and make deeper connections by doing more Pull than Push.

but you’re missing out on opportunities to connect with other human beings. you will be making it possible to accept the new habits I will talk about later. Avoiding Eye Contact. For me. others will juggle the loose change in their pocket. and taking up as little space as possible. The first part of this lesson I want to make you aware of the different ways you are conveying low status. Fiddling with Things. They do this because it is a way of avoiding making a connection with someone. and quickly correct them. Slouching over is a way of keeping a low profile. It portrays an image that you are socially awkward and unable to properly socialize. They are afraid that if they catch eye contact with someone they will be forced to talk or smile or do something else beyond their comfort zone.Social Superstar Day 12 Body Language 101 Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published:06/26/2008 The first thing you need to accept about your body language is that right now you’re probably completely unaware of the mistakes that you are making. Less confident people tend to look down a lot. 2. other people with run their hand through their hair. By taking the time to first break any of these bad habits you may have. Subconsciously people slouch because they are timid and don’t want attention on them. Some people will rub their chin or neck. 313 . When people feel insecure or nervous they start to have trouble sitting still. Doing any of these things immediately screams that you are not comfortable in your present situation. Body Language mistakes 1. it took watching myself on video a few times to really appreciate how many mistakes I was actually making. People try to blend in with the crowd by slumping their shoulders. Their insecurity eats away at them and they feel forced to constantly be moving their hands. bowing their heads. 3. Slouching Over. Hopefully by being consciously aware of these mistakes you can catch yourself in the act. Touching Your Face. By avoiding eye contact with people not only are you giving off a low status vibe.

as they appear to have nothing to offer. Habit 5: Push your chest out a bit and pull your shoulders back. A quick glance around a room can tell you which guys are going to succeed with the women they are talking to.The Best of TSBMAG. Tell your friends to point this out to you.. The successful guys are usually relaxed leaning away from the girl. If you’re talking to a group of people switch eye contact up between the different members of the group… but always be holding it with someone.COM 4. but don’t be afraid to get comfortable. When we tend to get nervous we tense up in the jaw. It can also give off the impression that you’re uncomfortable with the way you look and are trying to hide your face. These are not the kind of people other people want to interact with. hold eye contact about 50% of the time. 5. While doing the talking you should be holding eye contact for the majority of the time. Leaning Forward to Talk to Someone. Habit 3: Keep your muscles relaxed. You need to keep your face free of this stress. This displays the image that you’re too bored or tired to bother holding up your head straight. Habit 6: You should keep your feet about as far apart as your shoulders. Don’t slouch and look sloppy. Habit 2: Get in the habit of walking around with your head up and your neck straight. Habit 7: Take up space when you sit. This is especially true of your facial muscles. In the beginning you will need to constantly be checking yourself. If you don’t have a naturally attractive smile than you should practice in front of a mirror. 314 . The idea is to take up some space.. Habit 1: Make it a practice to hold eye contact with everyone that you meet. A smile displays a positive energy that is infectious. If someone else is talking to you. Create a little game with yourself to remind yourself to pay attention to your posture. If you think she can’t hear you… talk louder. Body Language Habits of the Alpha Male This second part of this lesson is designed to improve your body language and replace the negative habits you may have been displaying. This is another habit you will have to check often to avoid falling back into the old habit of slouching. The unsuccessful guys are the ones bent over leaning forward. causing her to move toward him. Holding Your Face up with Your Hand. and which guys will fail. It displays a lack of enthusiasm and energy towards life. Spread yourself out a bit. Habit 4: Smile often.

and become comfortable with the tension that comes from silence.” Try learning how to turn your head slowly. Habit 9: Avoid making sudden hyper gestures. Also walk with direction. If you want to attract beautiful women. chest puffed out a bit. But if you implement these habits over rest of these 31 days you will find that eventually it will become natural to you. On the subject of body language… voice tone is insanely important. how to blink slowly. relax. learn how to speak slower… and how to articulate every word better. Become comfortable pausing… it creates anticipation. When talking to someone avoid clutching on to your beer or putting your hands in your pocket. Learn how to speak with a deeper voice. Most guys talk too much. neck up. Don’t do it! Learn to lean back. Add more bass to your voice. If you’re giving a girl a once over. squeaky voices that convey the message: “I’m not confident… I have no self esteem”. how to change facial expressions slowly… and how to gesture slowly. and take big slow steps. too fast. This kind of body language transmits the message: “I’m so comfortable in my own skin. shoulders back. Most people speak with weak. it hurts”. and feel like they need to talk because they’re nervous. If you’re grabbing a drink off the bar take it at a speed that says “I’m in no hurry. do it slowly like it doesn’t embarrass you that she noticed. Learn to speak from down in your chest and stomach. The trick to pulling all these habits together is to use slow calculated gestures. you’re going to need to take a few lessons from Barry White. Habit 10: Use hand gestures when telling a story. Body language and voice tone habits are not easy to change. While technically it isn’t body language. Try never to appear to be in a hurry or flustered. all the same rules apply to it. Also. 315 . Every gesture you make should flow naturally at the same speed as your previous gestures. This means your head should be high.Social Superstar Habit 8: Walk with confidence and power. You want to give off the vibe that you know where it is and already are heading there. This is especially true when walking through a bar… you never want to give off the vibe that you’re looking for the cool place to be. It takes time and determination to break a bad habit and replace it with a new one.

sexually aware alpha male.The Best of TSBMAG.COM If you work on using your BODY AND VOICE to communicate that you’re a confident. then all the techniques you’re learning will work TEN times better. 316 . 317 .com/2008/06/28/building-your-social-circleday-13/ Or search for “Building Your Social Circle” on TSBMAG.Social Superstar Day 13 Building your Social Circle http://www.

I don’t view it as a way to “pull” a woman down to your level. let me just say that this article is NOT going to be some PROFOUND. piece of work that I’m trying to make sound more insightful than it probably is… It seems that everyone is doing that nowadays and I think that the message that people are trying to convey is getting lost in the fray. (Note: I DO NOT do this for a living.COM Day 14 How to Properly Tease a Woman Written by Brad Howard Originally Published: 06/30/2008 Before I start. the whole point of teasing is to create a fun environment where women can loosen up and open up to you. Teasing is also a great way to shake someone out of a funk.The Best of TSBMAG.) First and foremost. In fact. That being said. or get them to see that whatever’s going on it their life really isn’t that bad at all. and the interactions I’ve have with guys that aren’t having any problems in the “woman” department. Here’s what I mean: 318 . no matter how good looking she is I find that if you’re pulling YOURSELF down to HER level… you’ll find better success. hair) Your Body (best inner game changer… EVER!) If you can get these 4 aspects of your “game” down… you’ll CRUSH most men. This is just a collection of what I KNOW to be true from my personal life. complicated. here are the MOST important “things” that if you get down that will make the most impact in your dating/relationship life… bar none. I’m not out at bars testing out my latest and greatest “teasing” method… nor do I really expect YOU to be. They are: The Opinion Opener Teasing Your Look (clothes. So… with that aside… let's get to it… let's talk a little about my way of teasing women… and how it sparks sexual tension.

many times. but I don’t usually use it. 319 . The WHOLE POINT of teasing is to make the woman FEEL GOOD by being around you. So. she’s likely to be playful back.Social Superstar I like to use self depreciating humor to set up teasing. To which you could say something like. if you come from a place of strength. Where did you get your special talent (smile)?” And that’s just for opening someone up. Teasing works BEST with women that you already know… or that you’ve just met through a circle of friends (especially if you have a bit of notoriety amongst the group for being a fun guy). everything is working for you tonight EXCEPT those shoes… where did you get those?” Is there a way to say this so that it works? Absolutely. A woman’s ego is like a glass house and teasing in this way COULD be like throwing a ROCK into it. I just picked ‘em up and I always seem to screw this up… ha-ha”. It might work for some. “You know. and ask a woman “I need your opinion on something… and be BRUTAL… what do you think of these shoes. Would I RECOMMEND that you try it if you’re a rookie at the whole “teasing” game? Um… HELL NO! And here’s why. For instance. you might hear someone tell you to say. If you’re playful. It’s meant to be fun. I’ll throw out some self-depreciating humor as BAIT to get the ball rolling. She feels uncomfortable now… and the conversation takes a negative tone. “Ah ha! I KNEW you were some type of shoe guru. For instance. Don’t use teasing to “knock” a woman down. that I DON’T condone. Here’s the thing about teasing though. “Setting up TEASE BAIT” Teasing is no fun if only one person is doing it.

if you get on one knee and smile really pretty… I MIGHT even say yes…” Her: “I AM NOT!” You: “It’s okay. Her: “(maybe changing subject)” You: (laughing) “You can change the subject if you want. yeah I know… ha-ha). You: “Whoa.COM (The KEY to self-depreciating humor is that although you’re a strong. I am not” 320 . Again. but they are just too scared to tell anyone about them. Nelly… I know you’re just trying to get me drunk so you can take me home and do dirty things to me. So you say: “Yeah. really… it won’t make you a lesser person (smile). all you’re doing is ACCUSING the other person of trying to do something that YOU want to happen. yeah. On closer look. the reason this works is because people (women) can see how SECURE you are with yourself because MOST men would NEVER tell a story in which THEY were the one being made fun of. This works REALLY well. confident guy… you don’t take yourself so seriously) So maybe I’ll tell a fun story that people can laugh at (like the time I locked myself out of my hotel room NAKED and had to walk down to the desk NAKED to get another key) and then ACCUSE people of having similar stories. I get it… Look. what you’re up to…You may continue… (smile. POWERFUL STUFF here. Basically.The Best of TSBMAG. Let’s say that you want to ask a person out on a date (bland. but just remember that I KNOW (point to head). just say so. if you wanna ask me out. I use this ALL the time. wink) This also works well if you want to take it to a sexual level. “The Accusation Tease” This one is FUN. You don’t have to keep beating around the bush. (smile) Her: “Whatever. Who knows.

you’re a guy and that’s what guys want. Using the accusation tease is a SURE way to get her to give you a “love tap”… or punch on the arm… or a light shove. Missy… (whisper) it’s gonna take more than one (smile) Guys.Social Superstar You: “Man.) If she doesn’t snap out of her funk with this. I never expected YOU to let (someone/something) get under your skin like this. What would you do if I lost my hair all of the sudden. keep in mind that these ARE NOT serious conversations. well. would that mean you wouldn’t hang out any more? I TOTALLY expected more out of you. I’ve had such a shitty day… (blah. Start slow at first. or even a woman that you just met has had a really rotten day… but you want some sex… because. blah. we now have to employ our most SECRET WEAPON… “The Tickle Tease” NOTHING changes the tone of a conversation faster than some “good ole” tickling. feeling me up already and we just got here… geez…” “The Frame-Banging Tease” Okay. Here’s a hint. You: (Smiling) “Are you going to get in a better mood… huh… are you? Her: “Stop it!” 321 . we can go on and on with this but I hope you get my drift. Say your woman.” (You’re doing this to show her that it’s CRAZINESS for her to feel like she’s feeling… naturally. why is it that every woman thinks that she can buy you a drink and then try to get in your pants. They are tongue in check and playful. Like a little bit. To which you can reply: “Dang. I couldn’t think of a better term for this but here’s the gist of it. Here’s what you do: Her: “Man. this is what happened)” You: (Smiling) “Wow.

so I stole that from “Stripes”… shoot me) Then you just start kissing and BLAMMO! Bumming Monkeys Time. Wow. It’s the ULTIMATE way of flirting and getting her to chase you. That always works great. 322 . I can’t help the fact that almost everyone else in life is lame. Teasing is a fun way to build attraction and BOOKS have been written on the subject. Here’s my final tip on teasing… and pay attention because this is important. I like to think of it as “playing with myself” without all the mess. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had people ask me: “You just trip yourself out don’t you?” Me: “Absolutely. If you’re walking side by side and there is a physical object on her side… slowly start walking her into it. When you are teasing a woman. by the way) “Physical Teasing” Before I end this. bring back the old school “You’ve Got Something On Your Shirt” gag… where you point at a spot on her shirt and when she looks down. For example.The Best of TSBMAG. because I could literally go on forever on this topic… physical humor and teasing ROCKS. you bonk her nose with your finger. Fun Stuff.COM You: (tickling) “Are you in a better mood yet? Tell me I’m the greatest ever… who’s your buddy… who’s your pal… (okay. Or… and this is always fun. all while showing your strength as a man. I can’t believe I just said BLAMMO… ha-ha (The above statement is a great example of self depreciating humor. make sure that it’s fun for HER… but that you are ALSO AMUSING YOURSELF at the SAME TIME. That’s fun too. I also like walking up behind my woman and “shanking” her if she has on sweats or loose shorts in the house… and then ACT like I’m going to do it when we’re out in public.

laughing… Note: Having fun.Social Superstar You should try it sometime instead of living in “lame-o land”. 323 . (smiling. I’m done. with a touch of self depreciation as well) That’s it.

the coffee shop or a club to hang out and meet new people. Just as you would go to the mall. In fact.000 new users a day. but there are also 324 . you can use social networking sites to connect with and meet like-minded new friends.000 new users joining every day from around the world.The Best of TSBMAG.COM Day 15 How to Create a Kick Ass MySpace and Facebook Profile Written by Race de Priest Originally Published: 07/01/2008 WHY ONLINE GAME ROCKS AND HOW YOU CAN GET STARTED RIGHT NOW Now that the internet is such a big part of our lives. So how are you supposed to go about meeting and dating women from online? Is a woman weird for meeting a guy from sites like MySpace and Facebook? Can you actually legitimately meet sane AND hot women from online? Every time there is a new way of doing something it takes time for people to get comfortable with it. It’s not just for young people either. And because it is continually becoming more and more socially acceptable these same girls are open to meeting up with guys they met online. that cute girl standing in line at Starbuck’s today are all online. Facebook is close behind with about 250. but thanks to the emergence and popularity of social networking sites like MySpace and Facebook this is all changing. In many respects the idea of meeting people online is still fairly new. bookstores and coffee shops are on social networking sites. The fact of the matter is the same women you meet out at bars. at any given point in time there are more women online than there are in every bar in your city combined. the hot bartender. You should really view them as an online hang out. Obviously these sites are overflowing with women in their early 20’s and 30’s. The girl next door. there are well over 200 million members on MySpace alone with around 300. a bar. And guess what???…half of those are women! WHAT TYPES OF GIRLS ARE ON THESE SITES? Social networking sites are different than traditional dating sites. clubs.

or Asian Slender or Athletic body No Children Straight Social Drinker Non smoker Some College or College Graduate Within 5 miles of your zip You can literally search for the exact type of woman you are looking for. You have as much time as you need to craft the perfect response. THERE IS NO APPROACH ANXIETY ONLINE There is absolutely no social pressure when messaging women online. In addition. she is just a picture and some text. It’s like owning a bar where the bouncer only let’s in girls that fit exactly what you want. But it gets even better… IMAGINE A BAR FULL OF WOMEN HANDPICKED BY YOU When you meet women from sites like MySpace and Facebook you can literally browse and filter so that only the types of women you are looking for show up. If a girl does not respond you simply move on…no harm no foul. This is a relief for many guys who have trouble knowing what to say. Do you really want to miss out on such an easy way to meet all these women? I didn’t think so. When you are relaxed at your house you are more able to come up with an authentic responses. there is no “fear of rejection”. she gets to see a more accurate picture of who you are while allowing you to learn at your own pace how to successfully interact with women. Pacific Islander. She can’t shoot you down or embarrass you in front of her friends or other people. At the same time you will be corresponding with several different women simultaneously so there is no bother if a particular girl doesn’t respond. Say you want a girl who is: Between 22 and 26 5′0″-5′7″ Single/divorced Christian White. As you can see. Many of the world's best PUA’s and Social 325 . the reasons to add online game as a way to meet and date women is quite compelling.Social Superstar tons of women between 34 to 44 as well. In a sense.

HOW TO GET STARTED MEETING ALL THOSE CUTE GIRLS ONLINE The fist crucial step in meeting all those hot girls you see online is setting up your profile correctly. and music). Friendster.COM Artists still maintain their online profiles despite meeting women out in person because it is just too good not too.The Best of TSBMAG. you need to create a profile that connects with that type of girl. if you are unsure. Now the question is… HOW DO I SET UP MY PROFILE SO IT ATTRACTS WOMEN? Note: I will be specifically focusing on MySpace and Facebook because these are by far the largest social networking sites on the planet. your interests (i. if other women are attracted to you. Once again. what you look like. Match. your hobbies. It will form the basis for what a woman thinks about you and how she will interact with you. There are many elements that go into setting up your profile correctly. Simplicity and Readability 326 . books.e. Orkut. Here are the major things to keep in mind as you design your profile: Keep in mind the type of girl you want to attract. This is huge! Once you set your profile up correctly. After all. favorite movies. it literally WORKS FOR YOU! It’s like having your own personal PR firm who goes ahead of you and gets all the girls excited about wanting to meet you when you arrive. Hyves. Think of your profile as the online equivalent of your first impression. and somewhat of how popular you are. From your profile alone. what kind of job you have or what you do. what kind of friends you have. Remember to create a profile that is appealing to the type of girl you want to attract. But the underlying principles are universal and many of the guys we have successfully coached used them all over the world on sites like Bebo. If you want a bad girl with tattoos. go to the profiles of the types of girls you want to attract and copy their style or the style of the guy friends they have. a girl can figure out if you have any attractive qualities. your profile says a lot about you. what type of lifestyle you live. etc.

DO NOT write your life story. DO NOT be overly offensive DO NOT have terrible grammar/misspellings • • • Things you WANT to do in your About Me section: • • • Be Diverse List a variety of music. the fun things you do. Show her you are not a tool. and hobby interests. etc. 327 .e. When to write and what to write Take careful consideration about what you write about yourself. I don’t care”.Social Superstar Your mom was right about making things legible. Things you DONT WANT to do in your About Me section: • DO NOT try to sell yourself by talking about how cool you are. You will be perceived as trying too hard to gain approval. white text on a black background or any light on dark color scheme). etc. You want your profile to be as easy to read as possible. simplicity and readability is the key. Women will abandon your profile quickly if it takes too much effort to get an idea of who you are. Be goofy. A good way to start out is to use a solid background with contrasting text colors (i. And girls who don’t know you have no reason to spend their time reading about you unless you’ve compelled them to. the fun things you do. the beautiful women you hang out with. You don’t need to go overboard in this area. than to write your whole life story and bore her. If you try to write about how cool you are. and music by artists like the Spice Girls. List movies like The Little Mermaid. you will be perceived as trying too hard to gain approval. movies. Girls who don’t know you have no reason to spend their time reading about you. It is better to be brief yet have variety and keep her guessing. They will most likely see this and say “I don’t know you. the beautiful women you hang out with every weekend.

petite 328 . Having standards indicates abundance and a strong sense of identity.” It doesn’t have to be long. Make her curious to find out more about you. Here is one that we have used and has been very effective placed under the Who I’d Like to Meet section on MySpace or the About Me section on Facebook: “If you are cute rather than hot. Going back to the characteristics women screen for. you can let her go. giving her more reason to search for a connection with you. Use Disqualifying Statements Create a small list of disqualifiers. You can even leave out your interests. fun. • Be Creative In your About Me section.COM • When writing it is better to be brief yet have variety and keep her guessing. than to write your whole life story and bore her. Here are a few examples of disqualifying statements: Rules for being my MySpace/Facebook friend: • • • • • No liars (unless you are flirting) No flaky people No granny panties! (unless you are actually a grandma ) No psycho stalker chicks! I don’t care how hot you think you are! No BORING PEOPLE … You must be fun Another option is to put up a qualifying statement on your page.The Best of TSBMAG. You know what you want and you have enough options so that if a girl does not match up. clever rather than cool. “I love meeting new people” or “I surround myself with positive. we need just enough to intrigue her. Don’t say “I’m new to this whole MySpace/Facebook thing” or “all my friends are on here so I figured I would create an account. Again. and outrageous people. spontaneous. A disqualifier is any statement that demonstrates you have standards by declaring that the recipient is unqualified or ineligible for you. you want to be an enigma she wants to figure out. but not so much as to bore her. be creative.” Talk about things like.

com or your own MySpace photo album. Your pictures can make her curious. a challenge to figure out. Use a range of pictures showing different aspects of your personality. 329 . Women like men who know what they want. some travel shots. etc. As we have already learned.Social Superstar rather than slim. It is as if each picture is showing off a different side of your personality.photobucket. On MySpace. some partying with hot girls. these will be a woman’s first impression of you. This allows a girl to get a snapshot of how exciting and fun you are.” You must show that you have standards. put your pictures up on a photo-rating site like www. On Facebook. It would be far better to only have those three in which you look your best. Remember. Choose only the best Choose only the pictures in which you look the If in doubt. Embed pictures into your profile We have found that actually embedding pictures into your profile is the easiest and most effective way to make a great first impression on girls. now is the time to sit down and figure it out. and see which ones receive the highest rating. and that is one of the most important first steps to attracting a woman online. some of you with your niece or your dog. Why not make it as good as possible? The following are some guidelines to follow when choosing what pictures to use: Use a variety You want to have pictures depicting you doing a variety of different activities. some doing something goofy. A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS The pictures you choose to use on your profile are vitally important. you just need to add an application like Big Photo or Slideshows. then the other seven are creating a bad impression. If you do not know what you want. In most cases. the first step is to upload your pictures to an image hosting site like www. then I would like to meet you.HotorNot. They want a man with a sense of mystery. your page is your way of demonstrating how cool and how socially desirable you are. You don’t want to have twelve pictures of you drinking beer with your buddies. women like a man with some depth to him. Have some action shots. If you upload ten pictures and you only look good in three of them.

which you can get to from the main navigation bar at the top of the page. That way you can have a whole variety of music. Hint: write funny captions to go along with your pictures to demonstrate even more of your personality Just paste the following HTML code above the embed image code shown above: <div><font size=+2>Picture caption</font></div> Main profile picture For your main profile picture. This is just one more way for her to connect with you. We have received so many comments on the songs we have Using a playlist is even better. paste the following HTML code into any section you want the photo to show up (i. don’t put up a picture of you shirtless…EVER! OTHER USEFUL ATTRACTION ELEMENTS AND TIPS Use Music Music is a great way to connect with This technique will ensure that your images are not too large and that they’re easy to view.imagehost. 330 . Who I’d like to Meet): <img src=”http://www. if you are going to put up a picture of just yourself. or one of you doing something exciting like surfing. Girls love to make other girls jealous! Caution: If you are going to put up a picture of you with your shirt off.). The playlist tool we use is: www.imagehost.jpg will be re-placed with the URL pointing to your image. Otherwise make it a group picture with cute girls in it. By specifying the width property in the <img> tag you ensure that your photos will have a consistent width (the height of the image will be adjusted automatically to maintain the original aspect ratio). playing etc.e. If you don’t have any.COM Next. dancing. rock-climbing. But just to be safe. make sure you are in good shape and doing an activity where it is appropriate to have it off (i. You can find music on MySpace in the Music section. make it either a really good/professional picture (no wannabe modeling pictures with your shirt off please). About Me. posing in front of the Eiffel Tower. Interests. at the beach.The Best of TSBMAG. etc.jpg” width=”400”> <br /> Where http://www. go out to a club and tell the hottest girl you can find that you need some new MySpace/Facebook pictures to make your ex-girlfriend jealous.e.

text table {height:0. You can modify your privacy settings by clicking on the “privacy” link next to the “logout” link in the top right corner. comments you made. td.} td.text td. it would be counterproductive for them to see that you have messaged other girls with the same or even similar messages For this reason.text td. td.” Adjust your Privacy Settings (FACEBOOK ONLY) There is far more of your personal contact information available to the general public on Facebook than on MySpace.text table {background-color:transparent.Social Superstar Hide your Friends List (MYSPACE ONLY) If you are just starting and have no friends.text td. comments you received.text span. “They all kept getting jealous about who was #1” or “I am a secret agent.text td. just say something like.text td.text td.orangetext15.} td.redlink.} td. td. If she can’t see your friends and sees a number of comments from gorgeous looking girls.btext {display:none.ztext table .text . so why do it online? While the mini-feed makes it convenient to see what your friends are up to online. td. You don’t randomly give your personal contact information to people you don’t know.text table table table.e. and even when you add a friend! For the simple fact that you are going to be messaging multiple girls. 331 .text table table td {padding:3. she will definitely wonder. td.text td.text table table br {display:inline. they can also see what you are up to. we recommend you configure the privacy settings for News Feed and Mini-Feed by unchecking (i. By default it lists all kinds of information like who you wrote to. Facebook also lists all of your recent actions on the site through a system called Mini-Feed. what you wrote. which you can get using the technique we’ll cover next. If she ever asks you why your friends are hidden.} td. and I don’t want to put my friends’ lives in peril.text td.text td. you can place this code in any section to hide your friends list: <style type=”text/css”> td.text table br.padding:0.text table td.border:0. turning off) most if not all of the notifications. We suggest that you remove all of your personal information such as email addresses and cell phone numbers.} </style> We recommend you do this anyway.text td.

demonstrate that there are a variety of different people that enjoy your company and show that you can have fun and laugh at yourself.{your name/screen name/nickname} or Subject: Strange Question Body: My crazy friends are sending me on an online scavenger hunt (I didn’t even know they had those?) for my (put in bday or some event that compels her to want to help you) and I have to get a sassy/fun comment on my page from the following: 1. This adds an air of mystique and ensures you don’t tap out potential girls in your area.COM Create Instant Social Proof To get comments on your MySpace page or Facebook wall from beautiful women just use this message: Subject: I was wondering … Body: My ex is stalking my profile. THINK OF IT AS YOUR OWN PERSONAL COMMERCIAL All in all think about your profile as your own personal commercial. This mystery builds attraction. Make your profile easy to read. Could you leave a comment to make her jealous? You know how it is…haha. Having your profile set up correctly will literally supercharge your success with women online and put you light 332 . It’s brilliant! Note: Make sure to use this technique with girls outside your area. So when a new girl looks at your page and sees all these other attractive girls writing sexy things about you. A girl should be able to look at your profile and very quickly get an idea of what you are all about. The cutest girl I can find 3. show that you have a diverse personality.The Best of TSBMAG. . she will wonder what makes you so sexy.(name) These comments will give you social proof. The dorkiest girl I can find Can you guess which one you are? Haha…so if you could help me out I will name my first born child after you… ha-ha j/k but I would really appreciate it . The hottest girl I can find 2. Thanks.

Remember to have fun with this and if you have any questions feel free to ask. Cheers. Race 333 .Social Superstar years ahead of all those other guys out there leaving your competition in the dust.

334 . We flirt for a variety of purposes–from screening for a long-term partner. The vast majority of our flirting techniques were developed for situations in which people were connecting face-to-face. it’s important to understand how search engines work. If you are the one searching. that can be used in almost any situation. it’s important that you have a great profile. To have a great profile. in today’s increasingly technological world. Creating a Great Profile Whether you have a subscription to an online dating service or not. 2. you need to (1) come up in as many searches as possible. running…). to simply being social. flirting online has gone from a geeks. ran. to run a successful search you are better off putting in a noun: runner. to scoring a one-night stand. odds are that you have a profile on some kind of social networking site. However.The Best of TSBMAG. Later-stages flirting: keeping the momentum. Most searches that you will run are “keyword” searches (though many online dating services let you set all types of parameters via advanced search forms). both physical and verbal. Because people are becoming increasingly accessible online (you can find out far more about far more people in a day via their profiles than you could in person). Verbs don’t usually fare too well in keyword searches because there are so many conjugations (run. 3.COM Day 16 Tips for Flirting Online Written by Honey Originally Published: 07/02/2008 Flirting consists of a variety of tactics. and (2) deliver the goods once someone clicks on your profile. There are three main types of online flirting: 1. Pre-emptive flirting: creating a great profile.or losers-only pastime to a necessary skill. Early-stages flirting: the first few e-mails and/or texts. As far as coming up in random searches.

ever. then how can you come off as a person of value if you don’t have anything to offer beyond clichés? The First Few E-mails Unsurprisingly. Tell stories. have fun. However. List specifics. For example. For anyone who’s been on these types of sites for any amount of time at all. How about you and I go see it and then tell my friend how wrong he was about Jet Li?” Now the first thing you’ll probably notice is that the second example is much longer. For heaven’s sake. Once someone gets to your profile. or “poke” them or any of that gay sh#t. This is especially important because no matter which of the three terms someone searches for. one caveat is never. that’s no accident. they’re halfway to e-mailing you! There’s a huge difference between the following: • • “I like to hang out with friends. Well. for reasons I’ll explain) is pretty similar to my advice about profiles. Man up and give the lady (or fella) some real communication. you’ll come up. When I told my buddy that I thought The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor stood a chance of being decent. you might also put jogger or marathon in your profile. if you’re into that—I’m not. you could try some synonyms as well. you can easily increase the likelihood of coming up in other people’s searches by using synonyms. Ask questions. if the online world is like a giant bar. sipping on a Jeremiah Red and talking about how Robert Downey Jr. And don’t be afraid to ask questions—a nice rhetorical question gets the other person thinking about how they’d answer. my advice about the first few e-mails (or online chats. While you don’t want to go on and on. the two big keys to a great profile are making sure your profile is upbeat (no one wants to date a bummer) and saying something of substance. “wink” at someone. If you’re running a search and come up empty the first time. Tell stories.” “On any given Tuesday.’s performance saved Iron Man. and once they have an answer in their head.Social Superstar When you are creating your own profile. List specifics. the most important thing is specificity. these half-ass forms of communication are reviled 335 . you can find me at BJ’s brewery with friends. to catch people you might have missed. and watch movies. if you like to run. he almost spit his beer out! What a waste of a great porter.

but never found them. damnit! And since I type about 70 wpm 336 . I said. only one of us bites…”). “I’m sorry. thank them for doing so. Now a year later he’s there to greet me when I get home from work!”).” Type real words. and word it as a compliment ("I couldn’t help but be excited when I noticed that you are an animal lover”). so half your work is already done for you! You can tease them about using a wink at some point later on. i. • • I’m not a believer in asking for the digits but rather proposing the meetup.” He said. The formula for a great early e-mail is pretty simple: • • If they e-mailed or winked at you first. you should definitely respond back with an email. you kinda are).COM and make you seem wussy (which.The Best of TSBMAG. if someone winks at you and you at all like their profile. As a question that escalates the interaction to the next level. in a seemingly contradictory move.e. “How about beer on Friday?” And that was our first date… The reason that I’m going to come out against online chat is that (and I know this is a personal pet peeve) I hate all that misspelling and “textspeak. After a couple exchanges he tried to add me as a friend and couldn’t because he didn’t know my last name. and our first couple of interactions followed the pattern above. Now. a phone call or a meeting. Tell a story from your own experience that relates to what you liked about their profile (”I’ve never been a dog person. but last summer I found an abandoned Jack Russell in the parking lot of my complex. The reason for this is that the other person will then offer their digits without you having to weaken your position at all by asking! I met my BF on MySpace. if you’re too chicken to make a real first move. I sent him a one-line e-mail. and he e-mailed me back to say that we had a favorite author in common. You know they’re interested. I looked for his owners. When he e-mailed to ask. I don’t add people that I haven’t met in person. Say something specific that you liked about their profile. and also starts to build a non-threatening sexual vibe (”Maybe we should meet up at the dog park Saturday afternoon? I promise.

not to come across as desperate or stalker-ish. and don’t you dare send that second e-mail until you hear back from her first.Social Superstar and hardly anyone else does. and the keys are paying attention to the other person. not overwhelming her with super-long e-mails (which also kind of make you look like a loser who has nothing better to do in your spare time). and knowing when enough’s enough. I like e-mail because you can control the length and content as well as proofread for spelling and other errors before you hit “send. or just say how much you’re looking forward to your next meetup. • Keep your e-mails brief and stick to one topic. tone. Best of luck! 337 . and body language is lost when it’s just a window on someone’s computer screen. Keep it light! You should be making deep connections in person—trying to do so over e-mail just makes you a bummer. and keep your interactions light and fun. a flirty e-mail is a great tool to keep in touch. go for it—just remember the possible cons. spell everything correctly. sustain momentum. Keeping the Momentum Once you’ve met in person. The big tips: Again. • • Flirting is an art. make a mild sexual comment. it’s pretty tough for me to come off as anything except overly chatty. and make sure you’re not e-mailing a work account. If they suggest chatting. Again. avoiding clichés at all costs. use real words. since so many nuances. you should be teasing her with the promise of your presence. Tease. the goal is to sustain momentum.” It’s just much easier to put your best foot forward when you use e-mail as your medium. Don’t send more than two e-mails per day.

She says that she will get back to you and she never does. You build up the guts to talk to her. Well I’m going to lay out for you what is REALLY happening and what you really SHOULD be doing. 338 ..The Best of TSBMAG. To some of you it doesn’t make sense. shopping centre or the tennis club. You are left scratching your head. You still don’t get a response. to ask her out on a date. You think 'hey she is busy' and you try again later that same day. You see a hot chick at a club.Don’t Contact Her for At Least 48 Hours I know it sounds hard doesn’t it? But you have to stick by these rules.. thinking to yourself “where did it go wrong?” So here is the thing. She doesn’t pick up. So you call again and finally you get an answer. You talk to her expecting that things are going to pick up where you left off and are utterly stunned when she starts making excuses as to why she can’t meet up with you. Sound good? Let's get started.COM Day 17 Phone Game Strategy Written by Hot Alpha Female Originally Published: 07/03/2008 So let me paint the picture. Because when you can't wait for the 48 hours you appear needy and in need of a life. like the rule book suggests. Rule # 1 . make her laugh and somehow manage to get her number. Some of you may be baffled by this whole situation. Here is the thing. You think to yourself “SWEET!! I’m in”. I have been on dates with guys and literally like 2 minutes after the date they are messaging me and telling me what a great time they had on the date and how they would like to see me again. You end up calling her a couple of days later.

See it's great for us and is great for you too. Just make sure that when you follow this rule that you don’t wait too long after 48 hours. It's like an instant turn off. Except the item that you are selling is yourself. but this is not one of those instances. So do it not only as a favor for me. Now that doesn’t mean being something that you are not. It means that you can actually think about what you want to write. At the absolute 339 . If a guy texts us within 2 days of us handing out our number then that is sufficient enough for us to know that you are interested without appearing really needy and wussy. But it does mean that for the moment you operate within a certain guidelines until you have internalized all this “game stuff” … so bear with me ok? So as part of this.. So in other words you are going to have to look like something that she would want to date/buy. but for all the other poor girls out there. Now as a general rule with messaging keep it short and sweet. stalker. Every girl is comfortable with texting. Anything more than 4 days and the girl (if she is interested in you) starts to get pissed because you didn’t call her within that “calling period” and she assumes that you are not interested. You can mess with a girl and pretend that you are not interested. In fact we like them more to begin with. Let her know that you are on her radar and that you will be in contact with her soon. Rule # 2 .Social Superstar Then I have also had guys who send me a message straight after a date and then send me another one 30 minutes later wondering why I haven’t sent them a reply yet. Banter a lot. but don’t get into these messaging conversations. Now the main agenda with text is to warm her up. And there is no logical way to explain it. get a life. The only thing that runs through my mind is.. stick to the rule of messaging her first before you call her. and ewwww.Send Her A Text Msg First You know scoring a date is kind of like making a sale. you don’t have to think on the spot.

That’s the thing with phone calls. But you have to look at it from the point of view that YOU are the one in control because you have the strength to stop the messaging first =) Rule # 3 . doesn’t mean that you don’t have your work cut out for you! The first thing that you want to do when you call the girl is to break the ice and get her laughing. The best way to do this is to refer to something that happened when you last saw her. Rule # 4 . then he would call her within a minute or so. Essentially you want to get her back into the same state as she was in when she gave you that phone number. You actually want to keep things fairly casual and most importantly keep it brief. But one of the things that I heard one of the guys does on David D’s cds.The Best of TSBMAG. because she would have to be close to her phone in order to send the msg right?! Brilliant idea and I suggest that all you guys use it. He found that significantly increased his chance of getting to speak to her. Always be the one to end the messaging conversation. because they feel in control by being the ones to have the last say.COM maximum make sure that you only send 2-3 msgs in one conversation. This means that when the conversation is nearing an end.Msg Her and Then Call Her Ok so I have to admit that this is not something that I came up with. If a girl doesn’t think that she will be comfortable with you or will be able to trust you then she will not even consider going on that date with you. Maybe refer to a joke that you had previously found funny with her and give her updated content on it. 340 .Keep It Light And Keep It Casual Ok so when you call her for the first time after she has given you her phone number then it's not a good time to start going into a deep and meaningful conversation. You want to be able to establish comfort before you can even consider asking her out. This will bring her back to that place and help her feel more comfortable with you. He would msg this girl and then when she replied back. But just because it’s a short amount of time. Some of my friends have trouble with this. you are the one that has to stop sending her msgs.

All you have to get a chick to do. You don’t have to repeat your number and all that crap. you need to remember to give her the space to think about you. I know it sounds silly but its true and this is what goes through a chick's head. like you and trust you . But seriously don’t talk too long. Rule # 5 .Keep It Short and Sweet This kind of follows on from the other points. just leave a short msg and then hang up. She doesn’t have to know about all your past relationships before you guys go on a date.and then you can get her to go anywhere and do just about anything with her. is know you. Give her the gift of missing you ok? So with a voice mail you need to remember to keep it short and sweet. So in regards to what you should say. keep it light and keep it casual. then you can say something a little ball busting and then get her to give you a call back. Two or more becomes stalkerish. Like 5 minutes. There is nothing worse than a long winded voicemail msg with a guy who doesn’t know what he is talking about. who is wasting your time and YOUR credit! Random Tips 341 .Leave one voicemail that’s IT! If you have to leave a voicemail then make sure that its only one.Social Superstar So remember the rule. be prepared for a voicemail and know what you are going to say as well.. Rule # 6 .. When courting a girl. If you are constantly trying to impede on her space then she is totally not going to appreciate it. When calling a girl. Break the ice and get her to laugh before you even consider asking her out. As a general rule with this whole gaming and dating thing … Less is always MORE! Seriously… You don’t have to get an update of what this chick has been doing in the past 2 days.

There is no point in doing the wrong things over and over hoping that you will get a positive result in the end. If you message a girl and she doesn’t message you back. make her laugh and have a good time. because A) she thinks that you are a freak or B) she hasn’t warmed up to you yet. Here’s a tip. Firstly you should message first. then you need to know that you are going to have to do some major work on getting this girl to go on a date with you. If you find her being more quiet that usual. You can tell that a girl has warmed up to you when she is laughing at your jokes and the conversation is flowing. Remember to warm a girl up to you.. If the girl messages back. When a girl talks with ease.The Best of TSBMAG. then there is something up and she is not comfortable. In regards to what you should talk to her about … your main aim is to bust her balls. Now with that said … Now I want to see better conversion rates ok? *winks* 342 . it means that she is comfortable with you. You have to do what works.. Persistence is not the only tool you need. then your chances of getting to talk to her again are much higher. and this message contained some call to action on her behalf.COM Some of you may be wondering how many times you should call before giving up. Keep it short and sweet and always leave her wanting more.

because you avoid the profanity but still express surprise or shock. Since item 4 is fairly self-explanatory. Obviously. 2. Okay. 4. WTF is a good one. I use a few acronyms. etc). use it! Don’t use cutesy textspeak (ur instead of your. and pretty much everyone has it on their 343 . language is part and parcel of what pickup is all about.3. flirting via text is very effective. Maintaining a connection. Using textspeak on a 28 year woman with an MBA would totally deattract her.Social Superstar Day 18 Text Game for the Pua Written by Lance Originally Published: 07/07/2008 Text game is an integral part of my arsenal. Also. This also sets you apart from the legions of dorks who can’t spell worth a crap. Before I get started. Texting has similar properties to flirting over email (or sending messages using facebook or myspace). around 30. keep your language as tight as possible. To get the high value woman. Everyone has a cell phone. such as OMG or WTF. I have a few exceptions here. Flirting. Quick scheduling or announcements when I’m on the go. I’ll focus on 1 . and the girls I socialize with are high value woman in their mid or late 20’s that are educated. Escalation. I want to say a few words about writing style. I use texting for the following reasons: 1. 3. Why the big deal about grammar and spelling? Because if you’re using good English. consider this. Good spelling and punctuation. I’m a bit older. and supplement your lines with smiley's and other emoticons. but the quality that sets it apart is immediacy. Here’s how it breaks down: Flirting When used in the right ways. you’re coming from a position of high value and it shows you have a command of language. use punctuation.

I’ll use texts as a direct compliment. it’s possible that person won’t read it until the evening or the next day if you’re sending it to a personal account (and you should…don’t send flirty emails to a work or business account). Once she responds. I’ll use this to spur a longer text conversation and then mix in some “normal” text conversation. This dialogue establishes that you’re a normal guy and not a player (ha-ha) or merely a flirt. and fun. if you send an email. either in the same night or the next morning. I’d love to hear some perspectives. you should banter back and forth for a bit.COM person at all times. ie basic flirting. One way I flirt over text is to send messages that will compel her to write back. you would love it!” “Guess what I’m doing right now…it’s f’ing awesome!” “Just read your horoscope. There’s nothing wrong with a compliment as long as you’ve established a strong masculine frame during the date. If you send a text. the other person is going to read it within a few seconds.” All of these messages are intended to come out of the blue and compel her to write back and ask what it is you’re talking about. then you’re more popular…at least that seems to be the psychology. This gets her thinking about you and this method can be used to maintain a connection or escalate. you’re a great kisser WOW!” “You’re the cutest Leo EVER rawr. “You looked totally sexy in that dress. It’s like playing a little game.The Best of TSBMAG.” “Had a blast. but getting a text is like a little treat that breaks up the monotony of your day. 344 . If anyone wants to dive into point. It’ll pump her up and get her thinking about how cool you are. it’s crazy. Conversely. Everyone loves to receive text messages! I haven’t delved into this. The key is being playful. Here are a couple of examples: “Hey. it just depends on the direction you want to go. conversation was great. but I think some people derive a certain degree of social clout from the number of texts they get.” This creates a strong statement of interest and let’s her know that you’re absolutely interested in going further. Not only that. I often do this after a first date. If you’re a chick and you’re getting dozens more texts than the next girl. interesting. such as asking how her day went. just ate lunch at this great Thai place.

The key here is to flirt and be a bit mysterious so that she’s compelled to see you when you ask for a first meetup. As with everything else you should calibrate. but here are another couple of examples that initiate a value giving conversation: “Holy sh*t. you’ve got that sexy nerdy look RAWR. drama. and hot monkey sex. Monday at the office sucks (if you’ve got an office job) and getting flirty texts can be a real pick-me-up. and a phone call or two to maintain the connection until I see her and hit her with one. I rarely do fluff talk in these instances because you’ll risk losing the attraction by seeming mundane. Usually what I do when maintaining a connection is to offer a bit of value.Social Superstar Maintain a Connection If I’ve number closed a chick and I know I can’t see her again until the next weekend. Let’s face it. I’ll text her just a little bit during the week to remind her who I am. You can use the same lines from above. the craziest thing just happened to me!” “Your horoscope is insane today. Here’s an example: “The planets are aligned–today is a day for such as a laugh. or a horoscope (astrology is chick crack).” Escalation Texts are a great way to introduce or maintain a sexual frame. Don’t be afraid to cut loose. you can hit her like this: “Hey. This can be great fun and it’s an easy way to escalate. just make her smile! Credit Sean Deacon on that one. Keep in mind that pickups are tenuous affairs and flakes can happen at any time…texting helps to cement a future meetup. if you’re really slick.” “We should have talked to you longer DAMN you’re cute. you can make one up on the spot and sex it up a little.” 345 . OR. Your goal should be very simple. some MySpace stuff. a two line story. what are you doing??” “I loved your glasses.” What’s great about the horoscope thing is you can look up the quickie horoscopes on astrology. I like texting during the day when I know she’s at work. it’s the hot guy you met an hour ago. I’ll mix this in with a couple of emails. For instance. if you did a quick 5′ pickup and number closed a girl with a minimum of sexual framing. I’ve never met a girl who didn’t like getting her horoscope. but I think it’s really true.

I’ll meet you for drinks. you’re getting spanked. Try these: “Okay. you can and should use text as a way to maintain attraction.)” Work your basic push-pull and teasing in there. OMG I could barely keep my hands off you!!” “I can tell you’re going to be trouble. I won’t let you take advantage of me .” “My mom warned me about girls like you. This shows you’re playful and flirty and will get her into a sexual state of mind. and if you’re calibrated properly and pumping out good lines. All of these lines are examples and you should easily be able to come up with your own. 346 . You can do pretty much the same things if you’ve already had a date with a minimum of Kino or maybe just a kiss close. sexy texts.The Best of TSBMAG. Even if I’m dating someone and I know I can nail her whenever I want. this shit kills.COM This way you’re either establishing a sexual tone or maintaining one and getting her excited about thinking about you. I’ll still flirt because it’s a hell of a lot of fun and it gets her hot for the Lance cock. Hit her with texts that have a sexual tone and just plow forward. but you’re going to have to work extra hard for me.e.” “Happy hour on Friday…Don’t worry. I’m a big fan of these: “Had a blast. or if you’ve already had sex with her and plan on doing it again (i. dating or FBs). Chicks eat this up. Let’s say you’ve had sex once and you’re setting a date for next Friday night.” “Three guesses what I’m doing…if you get it wrong.” If you’re deep into a sexual frame with a chick. She’ll follow your lead and likely respond back with flirty.

Don’t try to do a first date on a weekend. The more you have your internal game straightened out and 347 . usually the cube and some type of fake palm read. Here are a few things to make them more successful. If not then dates will be a challenge. you must go for drinks.Social Superstar Day 19 How to Go on First Dates Written by Roosh V Originally Published: 07/08/2008 Besides sex. it’s very hard not to get at least a make out if she’s had three drinks in her. you want that part of your brain ready. well. Pick the right day. and even if you can it would be a stupid waste of energy. I also remind myself of a handful of innocent touching moves that prime her for the kiss. simply because she’s a girl and we all know the ones who can’t even go to the bathroom without a friend. The only thing I do before dates is have two fun routines ready. The worst thing you can do is lounge around at home all day in front of your computer and then go out without talking beforehand. You have two people who barely know each other alone and isolated with sexual tension and possibility in the air. ready to give a “primetime” night to someone you just met. You’re going to have to be. 3. 1. Plus chances are she will be busier on weekends anyway. 2. 4. You can get a lot done taking girls to coffee and ice cream dates. Stick to Monday through Thursday for the first date. especially if you haven’t kissed her yet. especially with the pressure of getting laid hanging over your head. Quick tip: On your way to dates call up a couple friends and shoot the shit for a while. Start the date at a quiet bar well after dinner so you don’t have to worry about getting food. Pick the right venue. There is no way you can memorize enough routines for a two hour or more date. first dates are the most fun part of the game. It’s natural to be nervous. She’s more nervous than you are. Preparation. but if your goal is to get into her pants as fast as possible. Weekend dates send the wrong message that you value her too much. Even if the date is short of a blockbuster. But I guarantee you she is more nervous than you are. real and this is where I hope your vibe is fun and interesting. Since first dates are mostly a talking affair.

then touching her hands and putting your arm behind her in the booth of the lounge you picked. going on dates every week and noting what worked and what didn’t. This is especially useful on dates when you're focused less on routines than when you first approach. Even if you don’t think you will get the lay on the same night. Think of her on a stage. twirling and spinning for your pleasure. I also stumbled on half a dozen touching 348 . it’s still a smart idea to go for it as you drop her home because it makes your job much easier for the second date. Go for the lay. While you don’t want to sound like a total idiot on the date. the reason you kiss her will be more because of the touching than the conversation. most of the work in turning out a good first date is done before you even show up.The Best of TSBMAG. I cannot stress how important this is. a mindset that keeps your game on without trying to game. 6. Whether this is reality or not doesn’t matter… just believe it. Even if you arrive early.COM believe a girl should prove her value to you. It took me about six years of constant practice but I figured out the “vibe”. Focus on escalation. The farther you get on the first date. How about if her long lost ex boyfriend calls the next day? You’ll kick yourself if you didn’t push as far as you could get. I was too scared I would get rejected and look like an idiot. A touch here or there that gets extended as the night goes on. the less you will be nervous. 7. mill around for a while until you are late. The first half hour will have almost no touching probably. I have a friend who shows up fifteen minutes late and I’m not sure that is extreme or not but I’m always at least five minutes later. but then the drinks get in your system and it becomes natural. The kiss will be a foregone conclusion. A little bit of preparation goes a long way in dates and it makes sense to do because you worked hard to meet her and get her out and don’t want to blow it with stupid mistakes. but even before that I remember my strategy to getting kisses used to be hoping and wishing she’d make the move and do it on her own. You want to stir up some anxiety and fear that she’s being stood up so that her insecurities are driven inward instead of on you. 5. That’s your number one goal. the less work you have to do on a second. Show up late. I sucked it up when I had enough and just started approaching like a machine. Plus even if the date goes well. where she judges you and picks for flaws. I made A LOT of stupid mistakes when first starting out in the game. you can’t make the assumption there will be a second. As you probably noticed.

I share all this and a lot more in my book Bang. 349 . and also the idea of the multi-venue date system to increase rapport and trust. Of course it’s backed by my Bust out the Condoms Guarantee.Social Superstar moves that help escalate on dates and in the bedroom.

I sent her an email that night. and teasing one another… it was genuinely the best date I had in months. We made arrangements to meet. things went even better.The Best of TSBMAG. She would write me these long rambling emails at four in the morning (that were just the most amusing things to read)… and I soon found myself very attracted to her. It was not so much that I wasn’t meeting any.COM Day 20 How to Get a Day Two Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/08/2008 A few years ago I was going through a slump with women. My better judgment told me to wait a day or two before contacting her again… but I couldn’t help it. doing shots together. it was that the ones I was meeting just weren’t up to my standards. she was even hotter than her online photos portrayed her to be. What day this week do you want to play tennis” (we had talked about playing tennis on the date) She didn’t respond to the email for a couple days. The conversation was flowing naturally. She never called me back. it felt like an eternity. we were laughing a lot. You are a really funny guy. When she arrived at my house. When she did respond. I was really starting to believe that either there were no quality girls left in the world. About that time I went on Match. or that I just couldn’t attract the ones I wanted. all she wrote was “I had a good time too. Something along the lines of “had a really great time last night. She didn’t answer so I left a message. These girls were falling for me quickly. Mid way through the date I was already imagining our future together. I waited a week then emailed her again “Guess we didn’t connect as much 350 . I was sensing a connection I didn’t feel with the other girls. she came back to my house for a” She never mentioned the tennis invite. and the evening ended on a high note. The night I got her email I called her. Within minutes of talking to her I was already feeling like this was going to be different. A little while after going on the site I started an online flirtation with this cute Filipino girl. When we got to the bar. Although I didn’t get a kiss that night. It was depressing me. And although it had only been one day since I saw her. The next day I couldn’t stop thinking about her. and I would soon have to break their hearts.

Normally I would never show my hand on a date… I would always keep the girl guessing what was going through my mind. I decided too soon that I liked her.” BAM it was over. You’re really nice… I’m just not sure what I’m looking for right now in terms of relationships. I let my guard down. to go see a movie she mentioned. Below I’m going to go over the mistakes I made on that meeting. Resorting to Nice Guy Lines. She wrote back the next day saying “Sorry I’ve just been busy. Because I felt there was this “connection” there. I began really analyzing what went wrong… and it became painfully obvious why she had no desire to see me again. With the Filipino girl. Girls can sense when you’re investing more than they are. This put me in the position to be the prize. I really believed that I had experienced a connection with the Filipino girl. I kept telling her how fun she was. I was way too attached to the outcome of the date. I would sit back and let them prove their worth to me. I was complimenting her way too much. Because I felt so comfortable with her I felt at ease to tell her about my recent trouble finding a girl I really liked. Mistakes that will Prevent Day Two Too quickly deciding that you like her. The mistake I made on this date was that I gave too much away. and she asked “what?” and I said “You’re just really cute. The previous girls that I was dating I was always the one doing the judging. My hope is that by reading through these mistakes I made you might be able to notice a thing or two that you’re doing that might be preventing you from getting a second date. We hadn’t even finished our first date and I was already asking her to play tennis together. 351 .Social Superstar as I thought” or something AFC like that. Once I decided that I liked her I started working too hard to impress her.” AGHHH I kept bringing up plans for a second date. I dropped all “player” mode and started to open up with her way to soon. I remember at one point I was smiling. and it will immediately lower your value and put her in the position of being the prize. I truly believed she was feeling the same way. The one girl I actually felt a connection with didn’t even have interest in a second date.

By making immediate plans you don’t give the girl the joy of wondering when she’s going to hear from you again.” Trying to Plan the Next Meeting Before the Date Ended. Here I was 2 hours into a great date and I was scared to leave my hand on her waist for more than a second.” I would very rarely make any physical contact. 352 . The fact that we had such a good time should have been used as a reason to wait a few days to call. I threw it all away by contacting her the next night. Remember. Although we were having a good time together. Let her Call the Shots. The minute I contacted her.’ When you don’t call. Once we got to the bar. She was the one suggesting what to drink. Roosh says “always say ’see you soon’ when you end a date. I was in “nice guy mode”. The whole time she’s waiting for my call my value is increasing in her mind by leaps and bounds. But that particular night I felt compelled to try to make plans to immediately see her again. she was the one who suggested we go on the dance floor. and have always naturally done since her. the more time she is going to spend thinking about you. her brain is going “Does he want me?” That is what you want her brain thinking.COM Not Escalating Kino. I even broke one of my cardinal date rules. and was scared to ruin the evening by “moving too fast. I used the fact that we had such a good time as a reason to call the next day. she quickly took the role of leader. she was the one who suggested that we move to a table in the back. when the DJ played a song she liked. About midnight she is the one to say “it's getting late we should get going. her brain went “OK I have this guy… now let me decide if I want him. In Bang. The less sure she is in her status with you. If she really had a good time she would be going crazy waiting for my call. I would be advancing towards sex after an hour into the date. It was like I was so scared of making a wrong move that I gave all power to her. When the bar got crowded. and when I did I would quickly pull away as to not scare her.” That was something that I always naturally did before her. Normally. always be the one who ends it. a large part of attraction occurs when the girl is away from you and thinking about you. even on dates with girls I didn’t like. Contacting her too Soon After Day One.The Best of TSBMAG.

I got needy and contacted her right away. Roosh gave you a perfect strategy for day one.Social Superstar Acting Needy When She Wasn’t Responding Quick Enough. If you follow his strategy and avoid the mistakes listed in this lesson than you should be having no trouble getting second dates. I still believe I could have savaged it if I was able to stay cool during our contacts post date. So how do you get a day two? If you want to know how to get a day two… the answer is to not make these mistakes on day one. And when I sensed she was blowing me off… I did the worst possible thing my sending her a message stating my feelings and trying to guilt her into seeing me again. 353 . Unfortunately I wasn’t. As many mistakes as I made on the date itself. Whenever she delayed contacted me.

mind you. the viewer would be most likely banging his head on his popcorn saying “get on with it already!” The main trouble is that whenever we are in alone dates. and the onlooker throws his soda at the screen. they communicate a lot and spend time together. Friends have several things in common. though usually it does. there was an undercurrent of attraction that can’t be ignored.COM Day 21 Building Sexual Tension Written by Evil Woobie Originally Published: 07/10/2008 Sexual tension happens when two individuals feel attracted to each other. When Sparks Fly Extreme attraction develops under the safe haven of friendship. we’ve known each other too long to let something like a relationship ruin our friendship. the devil called ‘friendship conscience’ comes in to ruin everything.” And so. I dated a guy who I shared a wonderful friendship with before going for the plunge. It doesn’t always lead to sex. The following words echo through our minds: “Hey.The Best of TSBMAG. In simple terms. We both know we are not ready for that. and could go on and on for a lifetime without the individuals concerned acting on it. At one or the other’s place.Not porn. watch a movie with a story line that involves sexual tension . it’s the ‘chemistry’ that happens between individuals who like each other. but one that has a gripping plot and an explosive love scene. At what point does the attraction build so that individuals enjoying a platonic friendship just let go and freely act on the attraction? This happens when sexual tension peaks. In fact. if our wholesome scenes were to be made into a movie. Escalating the Sexual Tension Here are some subtle things a guy can do to fan the flames of burning attraction and cross the border between friends and friends-withbenefits: 1. We’d see each other constantly and while all the things we did were wholesome. at least not yet. but don’t have sex. Think Top Gun (Tom Cruise) 354 . nothing happens.

The basis of which is that fear results in the same biological effects as sexual arousal i.While you bore her with the details of your soccer practice. Because you’re friends. Give her the power of seduction. The trick is not to sound too eager. but the Start of Better Things You are still very. Saying something like “you really looked sexy today during class.There are things that you can tell a person you feel attraction for online that you cannot say to her face. do NOT mention another girl’s name. “I just took a shower”). 2. very good friends. this could lead to more prolific things. regardless if it developed into a more serious one or not 355 . Since you know that she’s also into you. She already knows that you like her. particularly if she’s feeling a bit naughty. Once you overcome the sexual tension that’s been plaguing your relationship. rapid heartbeat. Besides. very scared is always an excuse to cuddle up. casually mention that you’re wearing only boxers because the humidity is killing you (or my favorite. say “when a girl kisses my ear…” or something similar.Social Superstar and Disclosure (Demi Moore). Or better yet.e. Encourage her to talk about her fantasies. ditch the romance movies and rent a thriller. It took all of my self control to prevent myself from just kissing you in a dark corner when we met for lunch” will convey the message that you appreciate her efforts to look her best. being very. while sharing yours. Sexy Phone Conversation . you are now free to continue a stronger friendship that will last for years and years to come. make her feel that her voice and the theme of your conversation are turning you progressively on. now it’s time to let her know that you think she’s hot. Some studies have shown that good horror films can be more sexually arousing than romance or even porn. bit by bit. 3. If you must describe making love. this will translate as sincere admiration more than harassment. Sex is not the End. Online chat . And for goodness’ sake. This is because you feel protected from an extreme reaction by your monitor and the x-mark on top of your browser. stimulated senses.

Stains just reek of low class. If your floor has splashes of spaghetti sauce. you don’t want to overwhelm visitors with your personal taste. 2. or decor for them to comment on. Although you want create an “at home feel” for yourself. A Guideline for keeping your place clean 1. Your place should serve a couple purposes. First. your place should provide some interesting conversation pieces for those visiting. Third. your place should provide an environment that makes the women feel insanely comfortable. While your choice of decor may change. Many times you will have someone you barely know back at your place. The more comfortable they feel at your place the more likely they will be to spend time there. sofa. Your best self that is. Second. or your counter is filled with grease… 356 . you should feel comfortable there.000 a year.COM Day 22 Preparing Your Bachelor Pad Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/11/2008 This lesson is going to be a guideline for some general rules when it comes to maintaining your place. The easiest way to relieve that tension is to have a bunch of interesting pictures. the fundamentals will always stay the same.The Best of TSBMAG. Obviously if you are in high school or college your place is going to look a little different than someone out of college making $100. What your goal should be is for your place to be a reflection of yourself. One of the most important ways to make your place a comfortable place for both you and the women in your life to spend time at is to keep it clean. The most important areas are surfaces that are visible such as corners. Get rid of stains. TV. Dust. tables. floors. furnishing. Focus your dusting on everything that can be seen.

what looks clean to us. You should have air fresheners for the kitchen and bathroom. and glass table. A Guideline for keeping your place smelling good There is nothing that will turn a woman off quicker than walking into a place that smells like crap. 3. Get rid of all hair in tub and sink. Keep the towels hanging nicely. Windows are an easy thing to clean and will make the room appear much nicer when they don’t have dust and smudges reflecting off of them. This is often a spot you will find yourself at with a girl listening to music or watching a video clip. Remember. The last thing you want is a girl not coming over because she’s too grossed out to use the bathroom. The same can be said for mirrors and glass tables. doesn’t necessarily look clean to them. Keep the place stocked with toilet paper. 357 . Make sure the toilet bowl smells good and looks clean. 5. If your couches have stains on them cover them with some kind of soft blanket. The other rooms I would recommend using candles. your desk is in order. mirrors. If you’ve been living with the smell for awhile chances are you won’t even notice it. It's always safe to constantly be clearing it.Social Superstar get it up. 4. If there is one area that girls will judge you the most on it's the way you keep your bathroom. You want to use this for your benefit and not against you. and most importantly… CLEAR YOUR BROWSING HISTORY ON YOUR COMPUTER. Bad smelling homes are immediately associated with dirty people. You never know what’s on there. I can’t tell you how many guys I know have messed things up with a girl by giving her the opportunity browse through his computer while he was in the shower. The sense of smell is closely associated with arousal. Clean your computer area. Your bathroom must be impeccable. or anything that would gross a girl out is gone. It is important to get other people’s perspective on the smell of your place. Make sure your computer is dusted off. Candles smell good and create a nice atmosphere. Wipe down windows. Make sure all stains and crud.

This is so simple. Decor This is the area where your personal taste sometimes has to be compromised a bit. yet so many of us continue to leave shirts. Don’t leave random stuff lying around. pants. and pillows. • • A Guideline for making your place more comfortable to women Lighting Lighting makes a huge difference in the appearance of your place. movie posters. these need to be changed often. blankets. While you want to reflect your personality you don’t want to look like The 40 Year old Virgin with rooms filled with toys. While all of these items have a place in your home. It communicates that you are a disorganized person. Especially in the summer time. • Dirty sheets. and sports memorabilia. I would usually recommend purchasing a dimmer that allows you to pull the lights up or down based on the mood. If there are items laying around that you no longer make use of.The Best of TSBMAG. Dump ashtrays regularly Take out the garbage daily Put gym gear in the laundry room Food remains should be wiped up immediately • • • • A Guideline for keeping the place neat and tidy • Get rid of all clutter.COM Below are some certain items you want to be aware of that may be contributing to a bad smell in your place. 358 . they should not be the most prominent items on display. either throw them away or put them in the basement or garage. Lighting is one the most important elements of creating a good ambiance. Put your clothes away. sneakers lying all over our bedroom.

I also tend to keep a six pack in the fridge. In the past I would try to go out and decorate my new place in a weekend. and then slowly decorate the place to match that style. I painted the place with Latin colors and then slowly found items that complimented the room. and window treatments online. I would buy items as I could afford them. wall decorations. purchase it as the money became available. pictures. Once I knew what style I was going for I began searching for items on Ebay and Amazon that would fit into the decor. I decided I wanted my place to have the feel of Buenos Aires. he must always be prepared for an overnight guest. For me. On that note. Since a true player. My old strategy caused me to purchase a lot of cheap items all at once. I find the best way to shop for home decor is online. I found several magazine articles that celebrated the style of Buenos Aires and then I created a look around those. Beverages You always want to have either bottled or filtered water available. You always want to keep about four pillows on your bed. I bought 90% of the framed art work. When a girl comes back to your place. never knows when he’ll be taking a new girl home.Social Superstar The best idea is to find a style that you like. It is a safe bet to always have a couple bottles of wine lying around. The best way to do this is to not cheap out on a good mattress. and when I found something I liked. Making her a margarita is always a nice way to break the tension and enjoy a good drink. Another good habit to get into is making your bed every morning. and stock a small bar with liquor. you want to make sure that your glasses and silverware are always clean. Once you have a good mattress purchase a nice comforter set to go along with it. This new strategy of decorating my place over the course of a couple months allowed me to search these sites. it's always nice to be able to offer for her to join you in a glass a wine. Bedding It goes without saying that you want your bed to be inviting as possible. Entertainment and Props 359 . A fun thing to do is have some frozen cocktails on hand.

The Best of TSBMAG.COM

I mentioned earlier that your place should provide some interesting conversation pieces. This means that you should frame some “story worthy” photos and have them lying around. These photos will serve to demonstrate your personality as well as offer you a chance to tell some good stories. I mentioned yesterday how a good coffee table book can initiate conversation and break the tension of bringing a girl back your place. It's not a bad idea to keep some props lying around. Props include things like personality tests, interesting quizzes, this lie detector test, or other fun games. It's also not a bad idea to keep a stack of reliable DVDs lying around. These should be a good mix of romantic movies, comedies, and interesting documentaries. You never know what kind of mood the two of you will be in when you arrive at your place, and it's good to have a variety to choose from. Another good idea is to be constantly DVRing interesting things on TV. This allows you to always have something of value to throw on. An absolute great addition to your living room is Nintendo WII. This is a video game system that women finally seem to enjoy as much, if not more, than men. It's great because it can introduce some competitive flirting and offers a dynamic opportunity for Kino. This should all be a great guideline for you to transform your place into an excellent bachelor bad. Remember that the main purpose of your place is to have you and her feel comfortable and to provide some entertainment for the two of you.


Social Superstar

Day 23 Quick Lesson in Kino
Written by The Dicknotist Originally Published: 07/14/2008

If you’re reading this, you’re probably looking for ways to obtain more sex in your life. Perhaps you want something more than just sex …or perhaps not. Either way, what separates true sex from porn is that the former involves touch whereas the latter is viewed through the pixels of a computer screen. Sex cannot happen without contact and neither can seduction. Too many guys make the mistake of focusing all their efforts on conversation and while your words may peak her interest, your touch is what will drive her wild with intense desire. From the moment a woman lays eyes on you, she’s unconsciously wondering how you’ll be in bed. Will you take charge as she surrenders her body to you or will you look to her on what to do? Will you be affectionate and attentive to her needs or will you just slam it in a few times and leave? Do you actually know what you’re doing in the bedroom or will she have to teach you like all the other guys? All of that is conveyed through your eye contact and touch. We’ve all read the now famous DiCarlo Escalation Ladder (DEL), which will give you the nuts and bolts of what to do, but not necessarily the mindset behind it. Guys who aren’t used to touching women will just lay their hands on her as if they’re in a video game. They earn five points for every time they brush her arm or tap her back. When I touch a woman, I don’t play for points; I play for pleasure. When I think of touch, I imagine that my hands are like paintbrushes plastering my emotions onto her body. Call me the Jackson Pollack of seduction: I paint her arms her arms and torso now so that I can sprinkle some more on her face later…with my other special brush. So, when first talking to a girl, I will often just lightly touch her outer arms and torso with my fingers as I’m talking to her. I see it as expressive: you touch her as you talk to emphasize important points. That touch is more subtle and friendly, aimed at just making her comfortable and more trusting. During high points in the interaction, however, your touch should become more appreciative. Touch serves two purposes: to emphasize what you’re saying to her and to appreciate her. An example of appreciation could be that in talking to

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her, she reveals that she works as a nurse. That immediately peaks your interest as your mom was a nurse and you realize the resiliency and compassion necessary for the job. Rather than just telling her how awesome that is, you should also touch her arm and hold it there a few seconds longer than usual and perhaps even stroke it. Expressive touch is like a period: light and quick. Appreciative touch is like an exclamation point, lasting a good 2-3 seconds. Yet the point isn’t for you to have this in your head while talking to a woman but to give you a context for which touch can amplify and supercharge your game. When you touch her, touch her as if you’re already making love to her. Cup your hand as you touch her back and cup the back of her shoulder blades. Don’t forget her sensitive spots, including her inner arms, behind her knees, the skin fold on the other side of her elbow. Later on in the interaction, touching her neck, ears, thighs, breasts will amplify her desire. Don’t be afraid to graze her breasts! Graze them now so you can glaze them later. You can get away with murder in the field as long as you are relaxed and slow down. Calibration is simply the act of doing things much more slowly, which includes walking, talking, and touching. You may be nervous, but if you can slow down your actions, you will be seen as confident and in control. Of course, touch is best demonstrated by viewing and trying it yourself. An excellent resource on touch is The Joy of Erotic Massage, which takes you through more than you’ll ever need to give women incredible pleasure with your touch from the first meet to sex. You can purchase a copy on Amazon, though you’ll probably be able to get it free through other means… I hope that when you read this essay and even see the video above, you will get some fresh ideas on how to use touch to build trust and sexual tension. Yet, to get the most out of any endeavor, you must go out and hit the field. Experiment and develop your own style. Innovation never comes from passively reading and watching. Like any man of character, you must act.


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Day 24 Body Language 202
Written by Dr. Fuji Originally Published: 07/15/2008

Body language is one of the most underrated, overlooked, and powerful elements in your social arsenal. The classic study on the elements of communication by Professor Albert Mehrabian (1971, “Silent Messages” Wadsworth, Belmont, California) found that nonverbal communication accounts for as much as 93% of all communication. Body language itself makes up more than half of that. So it should come as no surprise that what you say isn’t near as important as how and when you say it. In cold approach pick up, the individual who uses body language effectively often has significantly better results than his less-enlightened counterparts. In this article we’ll be delving into the use of body language to convey high value, how to show interest or disinterest non-verbally, and fixing common sticking points and pitfalls. Let’s begin. An interesting thing about body language is that it tends to override your verbal. In other words, people will believe your nonverbal communication more than even what you actually say. So if your verbally sub communicate high value but your non-verbal says the opposite, people will tend to trust the body language over the words. While seemingly counter-intuitive, the fact is most people tend to place more trust in forms of communication that are harder to consciously alter. We can lie with our words quite easily. Lying with our body language is much more difficult. Because your body language is so incredibly consistent, women especially have found that it’s generally a very effective way to evaluate others. And therein lays both the problem and the effectiveness of body language. It’s very difficult to change, but when you are successful, it conveys much more influence than other forms of communication. One of the most effective uses for body language is communicating value. We do this by consciously altering our behaviors and mannerisms from unattractive to attractive. Imagine two men, both of equal confidence, looks, attractiveness, and other factors. But one man makes eye contact when he speaks and the other looks away and fails to make eye contact. Who is more attractive? The objective is to sub363

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communicate through our body language that we are “high-value” (read: attractive) men. By “high-value,” we mean that we have high quantities of the social and evolutionary value to which people respond. A “highvalue” man is one who encompasses all of the qualities and mannerisms that women are hard-wired to find attractive. Think: confidence, leadership ability, power, attractiveness to other women, strength, internally validated, etc. There are three main body positions in most social situations which you can use to convey value: How you stand, how you walk/move, and how you sit. Although full body language overhauls are beyond the scope of this article, the fundamentals are quite simple. When you’re standing, you want to stand with your feet shoulder-width apart or slightly wider, shoulders pulled back, standing up straight, and chest somewhat out. Your weight should generally be towards the rear of your soles (closer to the heel) so that you always appear to be leaning back. It should not be an uncomfortable stance, but one which clearly does not lend itself to laziness. Picture the way a U.S. Marine would stand when at ease. Your stance should project confidence. Your hands should drape at your sides the way they naturally fall. Do not put your hands in your pockets or cross them over your chest. When you walk or move, the object is to convey dominance and purpose. Your hands should swing naturally at your sides while you walk but without looking either stiff or “floppy.” Practice this in the mirror if you suspect they are moving unnaturally. Walk at about 50% of your normal speed when in the venue. When you are moving towards something (a set, an exit, the bathrooms, etc), take the shortest route possible—usually a straight line. Instead of circling a set several times like a vulture, walk straight up with confidence. Similarly, when moving through the crowd, you want to project dominance. Oftentimes women notice you and the way you move or interact with people and they make judgments about you before you’ve even noticed them. Dominance is tough to put in text but it’s something we drill in our live boot camps. The objective is to be verbally polite while “guiding” people out of your way. Don’t be afraid to touch both men and women while you’re walking through a crowd. A hand gently on the triceps or back letting people know you’re coming through is a dominant, yet polite way of moving through the crowd and communicating that you expect people to move out of your way.


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When you sit, the objective is to take up space while appearing relaxed and comfortable. Don’t overdo ‘taking up space’ lest you come off as tryhard. What you want to communicate is that you do not make any apologies for your existence and that you are used to always being comfortable. It’s the same concept as locking in. Useful tactics to convey this include draping your arms over the backs of chairs or over the seatbacks of booths or couches. Your upper body should ideally be leaning back without hunching over. Feet and legs can be spread moderately or crossed ankle-to-knee. Sliding forward slightly in your seat will allow you to lean back even in a vertically-backed chair. The main communication here is that you are comfortable and confident. Do not cross your arms over your chest for this reason. The other thing that body language is extremely useful for is showing interest or disinterest nonverbally. Because women are so much better attuned to body language relative to men, they feel your nonverbal indicators of interest (IOIs) or disinterest (IODs) much more powerfully than we do as men. For example, facing a set or group is one way to nonverbally show interest. Conversely, facing away is a subtle show of disinterest. Other body language-based indicators of interest include: Leaning in, Kino escalation (escalating physical touch), strong eye contact, and cocking your head to the side. Indicators of disinterest include: leaning back, putting barriers between you and the set or group (especially in front of your midsection, e.g. arms crossed, drink in front of the chest, etc), not smiling, “body rocking”, and looking away. Note that some of these things can also be considered demonstrations of lower value so be cognizant of what you are communicating to people. The power in nonverbal IOIs and IODs are that they can be used both subtly and oftentimes with more impact than their verbal counterparts. For example, a nonverbal false time constraint (an IOD) is much more powerful than a verbal-only version. As we’ve discussed earlier, people tend to place more credibility on body language than verbal communication because of the difficulty involved in controlling it. The punishment-reward sub-dynamic is the underlying principle behind Mehow’s Chase Cycling™ model and is most effective when body language is used to both reward good behavior and punish bad behavior. A great example of this is during the first minute of the interaction. Sets generally don’t face you right off the opener. They’re usually facing each

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other. When you begin to hook the set, you can tell by their body language – they start to turn toward you. You can then nonverbally reward by more directly facing them or giving emotional value. If they give you IODs, you can punish by facing away and throwing a false time constraint (a verbal IOD). This psychologically conditions women to invest and to work for you. And as we all know, we value that which we work for. Finally, there are certain body language mistakes that the majority of guys find themselves making during their training. By being aware of these common sticking points, you’ll be better equipped to stop them before they become bad habits. Let’s examine a few of the most common: Leaning In: This is one of the most common sticking points most guys make. Leaning in is an instinctive body language move that you have to consciously change. The lower the set is (seated, lying down, shorter than you, etc.), the more you’ll feel the urge to lean in. Don’t do it. Have a wing observe you in set and let you know when you’re leaning in. Rewarding bad behavior: Directly and continually facing a set which is closed off and giving you IODs is rapport and acceptance-seeking. You are non-verbally rewarding the set for defiance. Instead, mirror a set’s body language IODs with your own. Take advantage of both false time constraints and body rocking to avoid continually facing a set that isn’t hooking. Lacking dominance: Everything you do in field should be done with confidence and dominance. From the initial approach, to Kino escalation, to simply walking through the crowd, your body language is communicating things about you. Dominant body language communicates confidence, pre-selection, and social proof. Fidgeting: Nervous ticks such as swaying from side to side, playing with your hands or fingers, moving around too much, or playing with your drink all tell the set and everyone around you that you are not only nervous around them, but that they are higher value and thus, you are emotionally reacting to them. The emotion of nervousness often manifests itself through these nervous behaviors. Eliminate them. You’ll notice a marked improvement in your interactions. Drink shield: This is another common sticking point the majority of men have. The “drink shield” is when people hold their drink in front of their chest in a social environment. The sub communication behind this body language tick is that you’re nervous and uneasy. So your instinctive reaction is to cover your midsection (traditionally the most vulnerable

com. You are trying to convey abundance. Hopefully this article has been able to shed some light on the importance of body language as a whole. you’ll start to automatically relax more in social situations. but to also convey interest or disinterest without opening our mouths. and body language is no exception. And of course. In this case it’s the drink. Information on our live programs can be found at www. This is why faking a smile for an extended period of time often makes us feel better on the inside as And it’s the basis behind parents telling their children not to cross their arms or frown. and relaxation with your body language. security. Just as your mind affects the body. Hands in pockets: This behavior also communicates that you’re nervous and that you feel awkward. Force yourself to relax and let your arms just fall. DJ Fuji Chief Instructor 367 . let them hang naturally by your sides. Instead. your body too affects the mind. but these are the absolute most common ones. You don’t know what to do with your hands so you shove them in your pockets. We cover body language much more in depth in our live programs and boot camps and also in Mehow’s esteemed Get the Girl!™ Manual available at www.mehow. there’s dozens more sticking points many guys will experience. One interesting side effect of good body language is that it not only affects your interactions but your psychology as well. Instead. Fix these behaviors and you’ll see a significant improvement in your game and in your own state. We’ve learned that not only does it allow us to show value. hold your drink down by your hip and don’t cross your arms or take a protective stance. but after some practice. See you all in the field. At the beginning you’ll have to force this. Of course. Your physiology often has a significant effect on your psychology. we’ve examined some of the most common sticking points and come up with solutions and fixes to remedy them.Social Superstar spot on most mammals) with some sort of protection.mehowgetthegirl. The human brain is constantly reacting to stimuli from the sensory system.

if you’re like most us. Most people suffer some form of anxiety disorder. You want to shed your “nice guy” image? It is impossible to try to imitate specific bad boy behavior. it’s time to MAN up! There is plenty that can be learned from these bad boys. If you want to stand out in a crowd. we found it easier to blame society for our lack of success with women. Instead.The Best of TSBMAG. Even if some of their reckless behavior will never suit your personality.COM Day 25 Being the Bad Boy Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/16/2008 You probably noticed as far back as grade school. Most fear stems from our need for approval. put yourself in their mindset. it is simply because that is the vibe that you’ve been sending off. Most of our fears are completely unwarranted. Most people are insecure. The Bad Boy trait you should emulate 1. So instead of trying to learn from these “jerks” whom we weren’t alpha enough to hang with. It will come across forced and insincere. Feel the fear. you can try adopting some of their character traits to increase your attractiveness. We are held back by our fear of losing our job. while we were getting stuck in the friend zone. our fear of going 368 . that girls are attracted to guys who possess a bit of that bad boy persona. In fact. “women only like the assholes.” Well boys. The reason most of us viewed these guys as assholes or jerks is simply because we were jealous and envious that these guys were always dating the girls that we wanted. Most people are held back by various forms of fear. then do it anyway. You’re fearless. Live life through their eyes. and create an acceptable excuse for ourselves. you’ve probably often asked yourself “why all girls like the assholes?” or “How come the jerks get all the girls?” This is not so say that being a bad boy makes you an asshole or a jerk. If you’ve found yourself too often getting stuck in the friend zone. live a fearless existence. our fear of being laughed at.

Do you want to call out of work and go the beach? Do it! Do you want to tell the counter girl at the bank that she’s sexy as hell? Do it! Do you want to finally change the style of your haircut? Jump out a plane? Get a tattoo? Have sex with a stranger? Do whatever the fuck you want! Whenever the fuck you want! Do this for just 2 days and experience the thrill of being fearless. The bad boy makes her forget all about her fears and insecurities. 369 . and we’re not even afraid of the consequences of the wrong decision… We are afraid of what people will say about us… what people will think about us. And she gets addicted to it. He takes her into his fearless existence. or how you appear. After the two days you can go back to worrying about what people think. say what you feel like saying. trivial reason is holding you back. Most of us are working a job we hate. What would your personality be like if you weren’t governed by all of these fears? If you take a look at the short list of our major fears… you’ll find that not one of them is life threatening. a woman sees a reflection of most of her fears and insecurities. How refreshing is it when we meet someone who isn’t controlled by these fears? Women are attracted to bad boys. our fear of ruining our reputation. most of our major fears are solely based on what thoughts someone else will have about us. our fear of rejection. lonely or in a shitty relationship. My challenge to you Live the next two days of your life completely fearless.” do exactly what you want to do. In fact. or whatever other insignificant. In the average guy. because bad boys provide an adrenaline rush that the average guy does not. approach who you feel like approaching. Because they can sit and talk and wallow in their fears and insecurities together. have given up our dreams… because we are afraid of making the wrong decision. Just for the next two days. How ridiculous does that sound when you really think about it? 90% of the decisions that you make are influenced by your need for approval. our fear of making a mistake.Social Superstar broke. tell someone who has pissed you off to “fuck off. This is why the average guy becomes her friend. 370 .COM More information on being the bad boy In our most recent podcast we went over an entire list of ways you can take on more of the bad boy attitude.The Best of TSBMAG. showing how a bad boy would react as opposed to the typical “nice guy.” If you feel that you need to incorporate more bad boy traits into your persona I highly recommend listening to our How to Be the Bad Boy Women Want podcast. We even went into specific examples.

What you are doing here is confusing her. A great way to do this is to call her and ask her to hang out. Bobby’s Step by Step Plan The first thing that you need to do is effectively disappear from your friend’s life. The better friends you are with this girl. you should always be implying that really great things are going on in your life. trying to make her jealous. This is to be done without making her feel like you’re mad at her. Assuming enough time has 371 . texts. She can never feel like you’re bragging. This means you spend a reasonable amount of time with her. Her simply missing you will not be enough to stir up immense attraction for you. the longer this process should go on. emails. but brief and vague. Wait a day or two before getting back to her. text or email immediately. First. and communicate often through phone. I will also assume that you are actually friends with her and not just an acquaintance. You should spend at least one month apart. and the confusion will cause her to spend more time thinking about you. When she contacts you… don’t answer the phone call. When you do talk to her be pleasant. and visits. I am going to assume that the female friend you’re interested in has firmly placed you in the friend zone. Now you need to amplify the jealousy and confusion. text messages. Although you will be vague. While you’re gone you also need to arouse some jealously on her part. This is a fine line that you have to be careful as you walk. This means cut off phone calls. The whole goal is to make her wonder what is going on in your life that you no longer have time for her.Social Superstar Day 26 How to Turn a Female Friend into Your Girlfriend (Part 1) Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/18/2008 For the sake of this lesson I am going to make a couple assumptions. Vagueness is the key to this part. or lying… The whole attitude should be that really great things are going on in your life… but you’re holding back from telling her because you don’t want to make her feel bad. or MySpace/Facebook.

) To go even further I would recommend getting a bunch of attractive girls to leave comments on your page.COM gone. she will be relieved that you finally called… and her jealousy and confusion will dwindle… Just when she thinks things are going back to the status quo. You should not spend all of your time away from her thinking about her and planning your next move.The Best of TSBMAG. Race and Kelly give a great way to go about getting these comments. and building attraction with as many girls as you can. When you cancel don’t schedule a new date. do everything you possibly can to get to your ideal weight. You should be doing everything you can to take your mind off of her. challenging. add some new cool pictures (preferably with some hot girls. It is important that you change up your profile a bit. and personally rewarding events imaginable. In the meantime. The confidence you will gain through your improvements will radiate throughout you. another great way to create jealousy is to take advantage of social networking sites. If you’re over weight. flirting. Above everything else. The other benefit of improving your social skills will be that it will naturally make you more attractive to your friend. During your time away from her you also need to be working on your social skills. you can bet she will be checking out your profile to see what’s going on in your life. You need to be filling your days with the most exciting. Improving your social skills serves many purposes. Basically you want to do everything I outlined in day 3 about updating your look. If you’re scrawny… join a gym and follow a good plan for bulking up. Many times guys fall for their female friend because she is the only girl in their life.. Assuming that the both of you are active on at least one social networking site like MySpace or Facebook. cancel the plans with her. The entire time that you’re away from her you need to be working on yourself. now is the time to get serious about change. Your 372 . Once again. be vague. it gives you a chance to see if you really want this girl to be your girlfriend. Once these guys go out and meet some new girls they realize that there is an abundance of women and no longer cling to this one girl the way they used to.. It is crucial that after her long time away from you. If there are physical areas of you that need improvement. that when she finally sees you again there is a very noticeable improvement in your appearance. You should be out talking. You should be hitting on other girls with reckless abandon.

I don’t mean visualize the act of sex… I want you to visualize what it will be like after your first kiss. amplify attraction. haircut. This is the end of today’s lesson. You will also be fine tuning your flirting skills which you will need later on when you start hanging out with your friend again. I swear by this. I found the biggest factor that used to hold me back from making a move on my friend was that I could not imagine the outcome. as I truly believed it is what finally allowed me to turn a friend of five years into a lover a couple years back. Experience the feeling of sitting next to her having moved past the friend zone. 373 . While I’ve stressed that during your time away from your friend you should put her out of your mind as much as possible. Part two will deal with how you will act when you finally meet up with your friend again. how you will break rapport. my brain resisted out of fear. and go for the kiss. The idea of lying in bed with her. The final thing you need to be doing relates strongly to lesson 1 which dealt with designing your life. The final benefit of improving your social skills immensely while you’re away from your female friend is because you’ll find it so much easier to create the confusion and jealousy that you’re aiming for. or just referring to her as my girlfriend was so foreign to me that it scared me senseless. As much as I wanted it. I followed the entire plan outlined above. Hold the vision in your mind and feel all of the feelings associated with it. This final exercise is so important because you have to train your brain to experience the new reality. there is one exception to that.Social Superstar new found confidence will probably impress her more than your new body. it is much more powerful if it's because you really do have better plans and more options. If you want to learn more about visualizations re-read lesson one. and then supplemented it with the visualizations… and I truly believe that without the visualizations I would not have been able to succeed with the plan. you need to spend fifteen minutes visualizing yourself with your friend as lovers. or wardrobe. Every morning upon waking and every evening before you go to bed. If you’re avoiding her phone calls and breaking plans with her. This will come into play in part two when I discuss finally meeting up with her again. or holding her hand.

party) you need to arrive there early. Hopefully you’ll have invited some other girls you know as well. Let her feel a little awkward and uncomfortable for awhile. club. How many times has she done that to you? I just want to add something in: Do not get too drunk. It is important that you spend this time building sexual tension through teasing her and using Kino. When you finally decide to hang out with your friend again you need to invite her to an event that is on your terms. During this evening you should be bouncing back and forth between your friend and the other girls in the location. You are to acknowledge her. It is critical that you immediately capitalize on this built up tension. Let's talk about how to capitalize on this built up anticipation. When your female friend arrives it is critical that you’re already engaged in some conversation with attractive women. If not. you need to begin making new friends immediately.COM Day 27 How to Get Your Female Friend into Bed Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/21/2008 If you are serious and strict about following the plan I laid out in part one of turning a friend into a lover then you will have built up an ample amount of tension and anticipation. For the short intervals that you spend with your friend the conversation should only consist of light and flirtatious talk. 374 . If you haven’t brought girls with you.The Best of TSBMAG. You can easily ruin everything you’ve been working for by losing control of yourself and saying or doing the wrong thing. but do not immediately run to her side. The goal of this first meeting is to display the “new” you in action. I would maintain nothing more than a good buzz throughout the night. Once you’ve established a meeting point (bar. This means inviting her to a party you’re hosting or a night out with you and your friends. When your friend finally arrives you should be talking to some girls. It is extremely easy to slip back into the status quo if you drop your guard. then you need to be an opening machine. Once you get to the location you need to establish yourself as the social charming guy of the evening. I don’t care if you have to open every set in the bar… find one that sticks.

as the tension is mounting. use an excuse). 375 . If you’ve followed everything correctly you should have built up some strong attraction. Or better yet. your goal isn’t to offend your friend or be mean… your goal is to build attraction. You need to take control of the frame and subtly let her know that you’re calling the shots now. Her emotions are going to be peaked by mid way through the night.. Personally. and friends don’t. or if you’re going to end the night leaving her wanting more. This means tease her with a gentle push. Once you’re alone with her you have to be sure to keep the sexual tension alive. Now it's just a matter of letting her know it's alright to embrace this attraction. If she starts talking about something that is not cooperating with the mood… break rapport again. Later in the night. the best way to break rapport is with physical contact. Some girls may not be game for making out in the club… in this case you need to find away to get her alone. This is something that you’re going to have to feel out. put your arm around her. She will be feeling attraction towards you. or grab her hand to look at her ring. tell her you going to get a drink and go talk to another girl. If you’re going to go for it all you need to be rapidly escalating Kino. This should go without saying. If she starts talking about some guy she’s dating-change the subject at the first chance you get. She will most likely try to suck you into talking about the same old status quo topics the two of you always discussed. touch her hair (likewise. You’ll need to use a combination of these touches to shift out of the friend zone.. These things are things that lovers do. You also need to be sure to break rapport. but I’ll say it anyway… never verbally acknowledge any of this.Social Superstar The time that you spend with her you need to be quickly escalating the Kino. Everything should be happening without mention of the paradigm shift. Remember. As the night gets later you have to make a decision. Sexual escalation is more effective because it is less ambiguous: hold her hand (use an excuse of looking at her rings or bracelets or nails if you need to). You have to decide if you’re going to shoot for the fences with your friend. or touch her ear to comment on her earring. I’ve found it is almost always most effective to swing for the fences the first night.

The Best of TSBMAG. Give it one more chance. tease. If she’s comfortable with that or looks at you in a seductive fashion it's on.. You have to encourage her to have sexual thoughts about you. If you find she is being completely unreceptive to your advances… then let the evening die down with you in control. If you’ve decided to hold off to another night to go for the kiss… I suggest making a deal with yourself... arrange for some friends to send periodic text messages to peak her interest. You need to break rapport. Simply look at the texts. You should look at her like you want her. and build attraction. flirt. The next time you hang out with her it can be alone.COM It won’t be enough to just tease her and escalate Kino. If you find at the end of this second night that she still isn’t receptive to being kissed… move on.. You need to act in a seductive manner. then put your phone back in your pocket. If you sense you need to build more attraction. smile. You should slow down your speech and deepen your voice. But if possible. Go in for the kiss. initiate Kino. Look at her lips and leave pauses where you just look at each other. This evening you must treat the same way as the previous evening. You need to prompt these thoughts by: • • • • You need to hold strong eye contact. then close out the evening talking to other girls and part ways with your friend. 376 .

To give credit so I don’t step on any toes or get a lawsuit thrown at me. If you decide one day you’re going to break the mold with a girl you’ve been seeing the vase cracks…yeah. It’s not that it can’t be fixed. while sad this can be prevented. If you are interested in a relationship. but the stuff below is golden. We’re all creatures of habit. I’m not reinventing the wheel here. One of my good friends got married a while back. maybe two months to make things how you want them to be. Apologies in advance for the long post. Should put a little perspective on the divorce rate in this country. It’s a mind-blowing experience to watch how some guys get treated in public…and they put up with it. Guys.Social Superstar Day 28 Managing a Relationship Written by M. The Vase Concept This is the best analogy I’ve heard…relationships are like a vase…clay and water getting molded together on a wheel. 377 . good luck with that. most of these are Sebastian Drake’s concepts. these are not my ideas. there it is and good luck changing it. Honeymoon was great. Here’s a true story. Chase Originally Published: 07/22/2008 I’m guessing since I’m getting married in September (let’s see how that goes) is why I was asked to write about managing a relationship for the 31 days series. The marriage lasted six months until he finally flipped. He was GIVEN a $20 allowance per week with the money he earned. Then she quit her job and took over the finances. or just a fuck buddy hopefully you can pick something up from this. Once the vase gets thrown into the oven and hardened. it just takes a hell of a lot of time to do it (and this goes double for friends or ex-girlfriends who already know you). I am not a guru. You only have a set amount of time. these are just guidelines I’ve been taught and implemented that have worked wonders. MLTR. Here we go… Let’s be blunt here…when women get complacent in a relationship they tend to treat their guy like shit. be it monogamous. then sit down and watch couples interact. buy a drink. If you think I’m joking head to the mall on a Saturday afternoon. everything was normal.

We all get caught up in the moment when we’re with a new girl we like.COM Precedence is absolutely key. If this will piss you off a couple of months from now don’t start the cycle. This is just psych 101. Frankly. You can’t exactly change someone’s personality. even if I have to water the damn things. Again. doing the laundry…whatever). good luck with that.The Best of TSBMAG. This was so far out of my reality I thought it was a joke…it 378 . You simply have to. Something in our heads wants to make her happy and seek approval. Draw the Battle-Lines Probably the best advice I’ve ever gotten. and this can be anything you seriously don’t want to do (going to plays. The moment you get fed up the precedent has been broken and the vase cracks. Would you drop an f-bomb in front of your grandmother? I know I wouldn’t have. If she disagrees on a trait you’re looking for it’s up to you if you want to pursue it. If she’s into you she’ll agree with pretty much anything you say unless it’s way out of her personality.” You can use a variation of this for any trait you’re looking for. Let me ask a question. Ashlyn just moved into my place and did some redecorating. This is very powerful in the seduction phase. This is also very good for compliance. Gentleman. but you can nudge them in certain directions. I’m surprised this isn’t addressed more in the community. singing karaoke. For example. people act like they are expected to. Do you act the same way around your best friend that you would around your boss? Now what you should ask yourself is why? The same thing goes for relationships. DO NOT do it from day one. Can’t say I’m exactly thrilled with the changes (I’m now a plant owner) but it’s something I can live with. If she asks you to do something. Getting someone to admit to something you want wins the battle…if they renege on it later you can bust them on it. Don’t get the wrong impression that you should never compromise. Never. I’ll drop something like “look at all the women in this place that need a man to hold their hand…please tell me you’re not like that. Everyone acts differently around different people. draw the battlelines. Set Expectations Guys. fancy dinners. if I’m into a woman and looking for a MLTR. People tend to live up to what they’ve admitted to. The real question is what you’re willing to compromise on.

something along the lines of “can we just have sex tonight instead of you doing me anal on the balcony”…fucking hilarious. bj every day. If anything I hope you guys got something out of this. sex 4 times a week…etc. M. A loyal girl. I’m trying to remember how this went. Now push it forward. If you set your expectations farther than what you really need you’ll always be in the clear when problems come up that have to be worked out. Whatever you really want. In the seduction context make a list of what will make you happy in a relationship. We all do it.Social Superstar wasn’t. When women get pissed they will push you to see what they can get away with. Chase II 379 .

Above all this is the number one trait of a good lover.COM Day 29 Tips for Getting Better in Bed Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/21/2008 If you want to have the ability to call a girl up every night of the week for a late night booty call. It doesn’t matter how great of a pick-up artist you are.. Even if she knows you’re a player. Use your hands and mouth to create intense sexual tension.The Best of TSBMAG. slow your style down so your tongues mesh together.. But even after some powerful foreplay you need to follow up an even more powerful lay. simply because you mirrored her style. Most girls really enjoy receiving oral sex… learn to read the signs she is giving you and get her pussy gushing from the oral. You’ll need to increase your stamina. Sexual options with women stems from building up a network of women who love having sex with you. she has to feel an intense sexual connection with you. You need to tailor everything to the girl you’re having sex with at this particular moment. If you want a mind blowing sexual session it has to last more than ten minutes. you need to be good in bed. If she is a slow passionate kisser. if you don’t perform in the bedroom you will never be able to create a life of unlimited options. If you know you’ve got a habit of finishing quickly than make sure you extend the foreplay. You need to make her feel like you know her inside and out. That is true sexual power. If she’s an aggressive and dominant kisser… sit back and follow her lead. Increase your stamina and last longer by focusing on 380 . Explore every area of her body until she is practically begging for it. Women who still want to sleep with you even after they realize that you’re not boyfriend material. I recently wrote a post about becoming a better lover where I discussed the art of reading the signs that a woman is giving you and continuing to push her in that direction. This starts with the kiss. You need to be able to recognize what a woman is enjoying. In this lesson I want to give you guys some tips for improving this area of your life. She’ll walk away thinking you were the best kisser in the world.

Having a little knowledge of some sexually erotic zones of a woman’s body will go a long way. Wearing nice smelling cologne can intensify the sexual desire she feels for you. Watch a video on giving an erotic hand massage or a video on giving a foot massage. use positions that you’re less likely to finish with. But having an idea of where it is and how to hit it will increase your likely hood of making her cum. Aim for the G-spot. 2. Smell Good. You also want to build up your energy level as well as increasing your testosterone level which will only fuel your fire in the bedroom. Having stubble on your face can irritate her and make things like kissing and oral sex a lot less pleasurable for her. Everything listed above are the fundamentals needed to become a better lover. The more you take care of your body the more likely she’ll be inclined to want to give you oral sex. using breathing patterns. Groom Yourself. 4.Social Superstar pleasing her rather than how good you feel. If you’re clueless about the G-spot read an article about how to find the g-spot 381 . Give a good massage. Shave. Just a small spray is best… or go for that just out of the shower smell. Below I’ve listed some general tips to improve the overall experience. More tips to be a better lover 1. Don’t obsess about the g-spot. 3. 5. and by practicing.

when I finally had the balls to end it. Where is this going? If you’ve been dating a girl that you have no intention of making your girlfriend… than you need to change the way you view these 3 questions. The irony of this is that you will probably find it is more difficult to end it with a girl than it was to get her. And what I hated more. It is never easy to end things with a girl… and every situation will be different. now I’ve learned to love when a girl asks me one those questions… because I’ve learned to just be honest with her. Where do we stand? 2. I used to fear it. This is because while you may view her as “practice” or “fun for the moment” or “somewhere to dump your load” she may have completely other thoughts running through her mind in regards to what the two of you have together.” Well.The Best of TSBMAG. Eventually you are bound to hear one of these 3 evil questions: 1. The longer you wait to end it. the harder it will be. the girl would throw it in my face how I should have just been honest with her back when she asked “where this was going. What is this? 3. was when months later. Now that you’re out meeting and dating a variety of girls you’ll quickly find that you won’t be on the same page as most of them. I hated the way I had to lie or change topics or be extremely vague with my answer. 382 .COM Day 30 Ending a Fling or Relationship Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/23/2008 There comes a time in every player’s life where he is forced to end relations with a female he no longer enjoys spending time with. I used to hate when a girl asked me one of these questions. and pray that things will roll along at the status quo. But there is one constant rule that does not change.

If a girl asks you “where this is headed” and you don’t see it turning into a long term relationship. This is a lot harder than it seems. The right decision may not always be the easiest. I know that sounds mean. I wrote a post awhile back called Why You Shouldn’t String Girls Along where I talked about the negative effect stringing a girl along has on your personality. You need to crush that hope. Many guys will continue dating a girl they have no feelings for simply because they are scared to be single or unable to give up the steady sex. There is an abundance of women available. The longer you date a girl you have no real feelings for the more resentment will grow inside of you. this will actually allow her to move on and get over you. As hard as it may seem to tell a girl you don’t love her or don’t want a relationship with her. That resentment is unhealthy for your soul.Social Superstar When a girl doesn’t ask “what is this” and lets thing go along like everything is fine… that is when it is exceptionally hard to end it.. you’ll be amazed at how quickly more will flow into your life. This is why you should use the opportunity most girls will present you with and come clean and be honest with them. If she doesn’t feel it's for real than she will be filled with hope that you will get back together. Tell her why. In yesterday’s lesson I talked about how if you’re really good in the bedroom you can usually keep sleeping with girls long after they’ve realized that you’re not going to be their boyfriend. You will 383 . If you let her know this after a few weeks than it is more likely she will keep you on the side as a booty call. But it is a lot meaner to let a girl waste two years hoping that you’ll finally see the light and be what she wanted.. The secret to ending a relationship is honesty. The more you try to sugar coat a break up the less likely she will feel the break up is for real. Ultimately it is all about living with integrity. This is not the mentality that a true player should have. She will respect you for your honesty. She can’t have those two years back. and you have to be the one to address the situation. The minute you free yourself up from one girl. In that case she doesn’t give you an out. tell her. But you’ll find that if you continually are honest with yourself and others your life will be a lot less complicated. it will be a lot harder to make the transition. If you lead a girl on for six months and then tell her that you don’t have feelings for her other than sexual. But this needs to be established as soon as possible.

384 .COM also find that you feel better about yourself.The Best of TSBMAG. and your sense of self worth will increase.

List Your Strengths What attributes do you have that will help you to achieve your goals? What do you have going for you? What are your strong points with approaching. List Your Opportunities Where is opportunity presenting itself? Is there a local club/group that you can join? Is there a girl just dying for you to make your move? Did an old fling show up back in your life? Did a new girl move in the 385 .Designing Your Life. Opportunities and Threats that that business might have or be facing. pua. relationships? What resources and assets do you have at your disposal? What do you do better than anyone else? 3. A SWOT analysis is a strategic tool that has been used for many years in business (and many other fields) to look at the Strengths.Social Superstar Day 31 Run a SWOT Analysis on Your Self Written by Bobby Rio Originally Published: 07/25/2008 Today is the last day in the 31 Days to Better Game series and as a result I want to make your last task a little reflective and forward looking. As a result you’ll want to have done Day 1’s task . dating. List Your Weaknesses What attributes do you have that are holding you back from achieving your goals? What skills do you not have as a successful player. Define Your Mission and Goals Before you carry out your SWOT it’s important that you know what your goals are (otherwise the exercise is a little pointless as you’ve got nothing to review yourself based upon). 1. or alpha male? What is ‘broken’ on your game? What could or should you improve about yourself? What should you probably avoid in your gaming? What is distracting you from your goals? 4. 2. Your task today is to run a SWOT Analysis on yourself. Much has been written about SWOT analysis and how to carry it out (I’ll let you do some searches on Google for it if you’re not familiar with it) however let me write a brief description of how to apply it to yourself. Weaknesses.

Analyze Your Reflections and Generate Strategies Take some time out to work out what you can do with your findings. 7. Doing a SWOT analysis is something that I do periodically on myself. List Your Threats What external things could or area is hindering you achieving your goals? Are you working too much and therefore coming home too tired to game? Do you not have enough money to go out to bars or clubs very often? Note . this website and on my overarching business also. Weaknesses.The Best of TSBMAG.Think of Strengths and Weaknesses as internal factors while Opportunities and Threats are external factors.‘doing the analysis of Strengths. Opportunities and Threats is only half the job. Plan to Do Something and Do It Translate your findings into an Action Plan and begin to implement it. Working out how to turn Weaknesses into Strengths and Threats into Opportunities is the key part of a SWOT analyses. How can you utilize your Strengths? How can you bring your Weaknesses to an end? How can you make the most of your Opportunities? How can you fend off the Threats? An old Marketing lecturer used to say .COM apartment across the hall? A part time job you should get to meet new people? 5. Have you ever done one on yourself? 386 . 6.

confidence building.000 in downloads. they were happy to find that it relocated to TSB Our Video Library We created a video library and filled it with the best of dating advice. 387 .tsbmag.tsbmag. live pickups. and Booty Call Game For those who loved the old Romp. The topics varied from dating. You can download all of our podcasts by visiting the link below. and funny clips.Social Superstar The Index Other things that have helped make TSB Magazine grow: Our Famous podcasts We have produced many podcasts that have totaled over Booty Call flash game. http://www. online dating. you absolutely must give it a shot. For those of you who have never had the experience of playing the game.tsbmag. We've also had the opportunity to interview many of the top dating coaches. http://www.

388 .The Best of TSBMAG. And forever a friend to Bobby. You have been there to keep us on track. We want to thank you for all the support you've shown us. We want you to know that we truly appreciate your support and encouragement and look forward to continuing to provide you with high quality content.COM Acknowledgements We would like to take the time to thank all of our loyal readers who have stuck by us over the years. and to provide invaluable suggestions. Very Special Thanks We would like to issue a special thanks and acknowledgement to long time reader Morgan Chase. Mike. and your effort and contribution do not go unnoticed. and Pete. You are an honorary inductee into the TSB Magazine Hall of Fame. Many of the long time readers of TSB remember him for his frequent commenting and patrol of the chat box. as you have gone above and beyond.

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