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I am not the person I was born to be. That person is locked deep inside, clawing her way out. She is fighting back tears as she pushes past all I've been through. She yearns to see the light; to be part of a world where expression is normal. She is tired of feeling nothing but hurt and suppressed emotions. She is tired of being strong. She is tired of being seen as emotionally vacant. She wants to cry it out when she reaches the surface. She wants to laugh about the good times. She wants to remember old friends. She wants to reminisce. For once in her turmoil-filled life, she wants to feel. I am crumbling. As I experience let-down after misfortune, my walls begin to tremble. Only 16 years in, and I can feel my soul begin to shatter. Is it right that a person so young must feel this way? The worst I should feel is heartbreak, but no. I have felt things much worse. From the day I was conceived, I was unwanted and unloved. That was the foundation for these past 16 years of more than I could handle. I try so hard to hold it all in. Never show any weakness, you·ll make yourself a target. I don·t want to point fingers, it will only make more trouble. I didn·t do this to myself, though. I am bright. I am wild. I am a free spirit. I am open-minded. I am carefree. I am happy. I am loving. I am protective. I am emotional. No, I am not. She is. She has been fighting a seemingly endless battle. She struggled as I suffered. The pain piled up, and she fell down again. She won·t keep falling. She·s getting stronger. She is determined. She won·t stay silent anymore. She has pushed through a few times, but I quickly rebuilt my walls, and shoved her back inside. She is clouding my thinking. I agree with her thoughts. The foundations of who I·ve become are falling hard and fast. Slowly, she is winning.