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George Bush was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade next

when his telephone rang.

"Hallo, Mr. Bush!" a heavily accented voice said. "This is FaisalAli


from Banga, District Multan, Pakistan. I am ringing to inform you
that we are officially declaring war on you !"

"Well, Faisal," Bush replied, "This is indeed important news! How


big is your army?"

"Right now," said Faisal, after a moment's calculation, "there is


myself, my cousin Khan, my next door neighbour Bhagoo, and the
entire kabadi team from the village. That makes eight"

Bush paused. "I must tell you, Faisal that I have one million men in
my army waiting to move on my command."

"BLOODY Hell " said Faisal. "I'll have to ring you back!"

Sure enough, the next day, Faisal called again.

"Mr. Bush, it is Faisal, I'm calling from Banga STD, the war is
still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be, Faisal?" Bush asked.

"Well, we have two combines, a donkey and Amjad's tractor."

Bush sighed. "I must tell you, Faisal, that I have 16,000 tanks and
14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to
1-1/2 million since we last spoke."

"Oh teri (oops)....." said Faisal. "I'll have to get back to you."

Sure enough, Faisal rang again the next day. "Mr. Bush, the war is
still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne...... We've
modified Amjads's tractor by adding a couple of shotguns, sticking
on some wings and the pind's generator. Four boys from Malpur have
joined us as well!"

Bush was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must
tell you, Faisal, that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter
planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided,
surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've
increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

"Tera bhala hovay ...." said Faisal, "I'll have to ring you back."

Sure enough, Faisal called again the next day. "Kehse?, Mr. Bush! I
am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war."

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Bush. "Why the sudden change of
heart?"

"Well," said Faisal, "we've all had a long chat over a couple of
parathas and decided there's no way we can feed two million
prisoners!."