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E. Joyce Moore
LIKE AIR, I RISE
E. Joyce Moore
“Sometimes at school there are girls who make fun of others girls just because they think that they can. Every time they do this I pray for them. Sometimes, I even say something to them. They get mad and make fun of me, too. But I don’t care because, like air, I rise. All people can be mean sometimes, but not always. The Bible says that you should treat others with respect, and the way you want to be treated. God loves us even through bad things. That‟s just it about God….” Jourdan A. Toliver Age 10
© 2011 All rights reserved
LIKE AIR, I RISE
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Becoming Love is Fair The First Time Lina Lua Loving Missed Me Haikus: Friendship/Peace/Truly Haikus: Love Is/Listen/Some Days Haikus: Just Talk/Growing/Nobody’s Perfect Haikus: True Reflections/Listen/Sweet Morning Lies Gone Reflections of a Love Affair Got Game What Matters This Ain’t You Speak Crushin’ Can’t Wait Don’t Make You About Me Time Missed Understandings Sad One Minute First Love Finding You The One (him) The One (her) Pathways Time Comes In The Mirror Seasons The Passage 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 23 24 25 26 27 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37
BECOMING Time takes wings and flies, baby girls do grow up But not too quickly, holding on to their sweet innocence Occasionally trading the Ipod for snuggles with Mommy Yet in the genesis of defining who she is While gazing selectively at the renderings of her self Proffered by those more comfortable with sameness. Knowing already that she alone gets to choose. Still in love with her dolls and animals stuffed Playing games, riding roller coasters Or running across the field with the neighbor‟s dog Curious still about what makes life, what means love. Old enough to know of life‟s twists and turns, yet Young enough to only peer around its corners. That is what comes quickly, when A lovely little girl becomes ten.
LOVE IS FAIR It‟s not fair. Often thought when perched on a bed Of disappointment While others seem to transcend to another level Leaving you behind Mom said you can‟t go While it all seems exciting You really don‟t know What you‟re asking for Until you get it You feel cheated. It‟s not true… Yet you do. Even though… Deep down inside You‟re relieved Sorry, you‟re not old enough yet Her, knowing what‟s around the corner you want to turn You, not knowing that there are corners of life you have yet to learn As impatience in you does a slow burn It‟s not fair. But at least you know She cares.
THE FIRST TIME I‟m not sorry I saved it. The one thing I kept for myself. That which was Important to others, just the taking, More important for me alone to keep. It‟s a part of me. It‟s precious. It‟s mine. I choose its giving.
LINA LUNA A star afraid of shining A beautiful flower Petals of a velvet hue Hidden from the morning dew One whose view in life‟s mirror If seen through all other eyes Would discover her wings that were always there …and fly.
To Mom and Dad
As an outsider looking in what I like most is the warmth of a love still growing. That smile in your eyes as you speak of yet another token of an immeasurable love he offered you today. How your eyes light up with pride As you enlighten me; Because you really do know her And Explain why you would never want to redesign undermine redefine the who that she is because she was doing just fine before you got there. It‟s the way you Reach back to help each other As you climb the mountain of life. Your lives are so rich with what you bring to the same table. Kings and Queens of material things are but envious paupers. Thank you for showing me What true loving looks like.
MISSED ME You don‟t get me Which is why our words fly past each other Missing the point of understanding. A part of me dies Every time I comply And give in to your lies About who I‟m supposed to be. What‟s you is not me. See, I will not rise to your occasion. But I will rise And you don‟t get me.
The worst thing about being lied to, is simply knowing you weren't worth the truth.
FRIENDSHIP Unrestricted words flow between us, as does time For we are good friends.
PEACE Peace flows to quiet Calming the storms from within. Just by forgiving.
TRULY You can breathe easy… Perfection‟s not required When you‟re truly loved.
LOVE IS.. Non-transferable The love I receive is mine No one else gets it.
LISTEN You know a whole lot But if you listen to me You‟ll know who I am.
SOME DAYS Some days, the sky‟s green The grass is blue, day is night. You can‟t change my mind.
JUST TALK It‟s no disrespect When I tell you what I think Worry when I‟m silent.
GROWING I am growing up Trying to figure it out I know, scares me too.
NOBODY’S PERFECT Everyone‟s wrong sometimes „Cause nobody‟s perfect. Right? Just don‟t lie to me.
TRUE REFLECTIONS What comes from within is the true reflection of what true beauty looks like
LISTEN No matter the pain Listen to your inner voice. God guides you through it.
SWEET MORNING Dawn brings a new day In the quiet moments newly born You smile at your self.
LIES You'll miss the good stuff just by not telling the truth. funny how that works.
GONE Grownups make choices That you have no voice in. What you see to feel Is what they can fail to see. The leaving is NOT a reflection or a rejection of you.
REFLECTIONS OF A LOVE AFFAIR To Mom and Dad
The reflection is a truth undeniably clear His eyes light up when you walk into the room. There is a sleepy smile for you when she wakes to another day. She can't wait to tell you what her opinions are He looks forward to telling you what his day turned out to be. Snuggling with you on the couch is an option oft used. And she feels safe telling you everything trusting that you have her heart/ even when you don't agree. He knows that he can risk failure while trying new things because you have his back, and will not be disappointed. you give her courage to define herself you give him freedom to know how to choose A true love affair Where the only perfection you expect is that she is perfectly happy and the only way he can please you is to learn how to be pleased with himself. The ultimate love affair only a child can understand/only a parent has the power to give. So that every look into your eyes Love‟s truth resonates as no surprise For they become the reflection in the mirror of your parenthood. Do you see yourself?
GOT GAME Who‟s right? Who‟s wrong? What does it matter Each day goes by As you get sadder Who is the winner When all is lost You play the game But at what cost? You win the game. But lose your self. To prove you could? That‟s it? What else? Takes much more courage To stop and say This costs too much, I will not play.
WHAT MATTERS Time spreads its gossamer wings And flies along its singular passage We are but passengers aboard its flight What truly matters are the memories we leave behind with the legacy only we can define. Dance to your own music. Laugh at your own silly self. Sing with your own voice. Time spreads its gossamer wings And flies along its singular passage We are but passengers aboard its flight.
THIS AIN’T YOU In a perfected world Where Daddies are Fathers And Mommies would Mother Without verbal weapons They turn on each other You wouldn‟t have to feel like you do. Fearful and confused. Know it‟s not your fault Nor what you can fix. It‟s a wave you can‟t catch You just have to ride through it Yet it still hurts. I know, you do. But you can‟t make them about you
— Maggie Kuhn
CRUSHIN’ Missed glances Crooked smiles Giggles with friends Pushes and runs He did it again! When he looks your way It tickles your tummy Kinda like you just twigged That these saplings are nascent Their aging takes time Youth‟s minutes abundant Why yes, you‟re all Shy and blushin‟ But it‟s not love It‟s just crushin‟…
That awkward moment when you realize you like your best friend. — Patrick Lang
CAN’T WAIT Just wait „til I‟m ten! A magic number A mystery to behold Age of double digits A wondrous place I‟m told. But… I did turn ten And then I‟m just one more year old. But then I‟ll be thirteen No longer called a „tween And almost practically somewhat grown I‟m thinkin‟ there‟s some things I can do all on my own But then again there are some days More often I‟ll admit I like to snuggle with my Mom I‟m lucky, I still fit. Can‟t wait „til I‟m sixteen It couldn‟t get here soon enough T‟was tougher than I thought To live life as a teenager Isn‟t all that it‟s cracked up. Being sixteen My lifelong dream Now I can drive the car What‟s that you say? I can‟t just play? You need stuff from the store? Finally, I‟m eighteen I made it; now (I think) I‟m grown Funny though I‟m not quite sure About being on my own.
Even when at college And everything is new I‟ll have to say I‟m glad that they Are a call away. Yes, they know what to do. And now at twenty one Getting older‟s not so fun. Though I‟m intrigued by one known fact: My parents are not dumb. In fact, they‟re pretty smart. Funny how that all works out I knew though, in my heart. In spite of the fuss I thought them unjust I realize now They were looking out For me and for my future The things I used to pout about Weren‟t even worth the effort. And one more thing I‟ll tell you This is the truth of it Although I‟m grown When I go home I still snuggle… I still fit.
DON’T MAKE YOU ABOUT ME To all frenemies Don't make you about me. I am not the salve(o) You cast upon your problems As you deflect To protect Your self from yourself Your hallelujahs and praise Have a hollow ring As I struggle To pull your bloody knife Out of my back. I am not the con you pulled on yourself Convinced that you‟ve changed When all you did was rearrange the furniture. Don‟t make me about you. I am not the one You retrofit your perceptions of Into someone else‟s reality In justification of your loss. Not at my cost. I will not be your collateral damage My kindness is not my weakness And you do not Define me.
TIME Just give me a minute. I know you want the best for me But I can‟t be who you weren‟t I am not the amendment of your past Mistakes are made by everyone And I will make mine. Just give me a moment To think things through I need to decide The path I will take Let this small decision Be the choice I make Just give me some time When I ask you for it And I will, I have questions And even if you don‟t have the answers I know you will listen Arms open wide Heart and mind too This is what I need From the mother in you. (And yes, from you, Dad, too.)
MISSED UNDERSTANDINGS doors slammed. we speak past each other in a phrenic whirl of words and no one wins. You hurt, I hurt. Words hurt. Who‟s the adult here? I‟m becoming one Is this how it‟s done? we are in a funny place. both needing respect neither getting what we deserve or perhaps we are. You hurt, I hurt. Words hurt. Who‟s the child? I need more than because I said so which worked when I was ten now I‟m reaching out for real answers though you think I‟m walking away, leaving you. You hurt, I hurt. Words hurt. Who will bend? maybe, maybe we can meet in the middle… and listen.
SAD Wearing a shroud of melancholy I sit by the window Watching life pass me by It‟s hard to disbelieve That one can just pull your self up with the straps of your boots and get on with it. Closed doors Dark room Loud music Aloneness I‟m hoping you‟ll be there When I‟m ready To ask for help… Or to help me When I can‟t.
ONE MINUTE Be me for one minute Walk in my shoes See life through my eyes From my point of view. Just for one minute See how I see you Feel what I feel Hurt like I do. Be me for one minute See you through my eyes Hear your betrayal When you tell me your lies. Be me for one minute If you felt all your hate Would it change how you treat me? Or is it too late? Be me for one minute You be your child And show how I love you How I wait for your smile
Be me for one minute Look at you through my eyes Through the eyes of your child Will my cries be your cries? Be me for one minute Hear you call me a name. And you don’t even know me. Yet say I’m to blame. Be me for one minute If you were me And saw you through my eyes Would it change who you’d be? Be me for one minute Walk in my shoes See life through my eyes From my point of view. Just for one minute See how I see you Feel what I feel Hurt like I do.
FIRST LOVE Your eyes meet He seems sweet soon you’re good friends And one day something changes He sees you girlwoman You see him boyman And time stops. Or so it seems Is he the boyman of your dreams? When you’re this young Dreams can fall apart He’s changing, you’re changing And one day something changes With time, you’ll be back where you start. As good friends. First loves don’t leave your heart.
"One of the hardest decisions you will ever have to make, is whether to stay and try harder, or take your memories and walk away. Why waste your time getting hurt by someone when there's someone else out there waiting to make you happy." -- BoothatshowIam from Twitter
FINDING YOU It‟s hard, growing up You just want to fit in You don‟t want to stand out Or start over again It‟s hard, growing up Trying to make some friends Hoping people will like you So you start to bend So you start to bend Change your clothes, cut your hair Change your mind, change your heart You pretend you don‟t care So you start to bend Before long you break Losing you in the maze It‟s a risk that you take It‟s a risk that you take When you stand on your own You decide to do you And at first you‟re alone It‟s a risk that you take But at last in the end When you‟re true to your self You will find some real friends.
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you.... The one who turns to his friends and says, 'That's her‟. — Harry Tottszer, Australia
Find a girl with kind eyes. Who won‟t tell you lies. Who likes who you are, and is only interested in what you do. Wait for the girl who likes that you write poetry, think deeply, and that you open the door for her when she gets in the car. Get with the girl who likes games only if they‟re played on a football field or computer and never with your heart. She‟d be the one who wants to be with you, not needing to be with you. She thinks drama belongs on the movie screen and doesn‟t aspire to a reality show life. She likes that you‟re smart and have a good heart. But she doesn‟t take crap from you either, which you respect. Go with that girl who accepts all of who you are and has no plans to change you into someone she‟s imagined you should be. Someone who„s just fine with a kiss on the cheek on a sunny day and points you out in the library saying, “I‟m with him.”
TIME COMES It’s okay to grieve. Any loss… life, love, who left, or even if you had to go Hurts. We are all but a mist of common destiny having but a moment to make our mark. It’s okay to cry. Parents aren’t perfect… She made you mad by what she chose to say or do. And well, sometimes your choices made her mad too. But you loved each other. and forgave. It’s okay to be angry. Because life is seemingly unfair when the time given seems never enough… although we know within ourselves HE knows when to say when. It’s okay to cry. Smiles will come And a chuckle or two when memories outlive the pain of letting go. And it will be okay to laugh again. and even then… It’s okay to cry.
IN THE MIRROR
Wondering why when my little girl thick hair full of curls looks into the mirror and does not see what she is repeatedly told defines true beauty and asks me if her eyes can be colored blue… makes me mad. we have all been had. As we dye our hair all shades of blonde or slap a wig on trying to pretend that no one will notice that our skin is brown. Who's the fool? Is it 'cause we see black men more than one acting like they won with a woman they wouldn't give the time of day if her skin had a permanent tan. So I am going to take a stand and eliminate those who peddle whatever and deliver the idea that I am less than they are more and help my princess learn to define herself from within and appreciate without permission the beautiful girl in the mirror.
SEASONS So it seems Each of us rush time Always thinking of the next era Searching for the secrets Of life‟s changing libretto Never once stopping to own Seconds of happiness, moments of bliss
THE PASSAGE A challenging and wondrous journey. Sometimes confusing when you can’t decide To play a new CD Or with your doll that’s sitting Crumpled in a corner with an expectant eye on you Knowing that you’ll be back… Because we always come back. Sometimes it makes you angry When you believe you’re grown enough To go there with them, though you’ve never been If not now, when? But parents can see around the corner of that desire That you aspire to. They’ve been there, done that and want to save you the trouble. At least while they can. It’s hard. A moment’s decision can change everything When in doubt don’t or say you will When you know you won’t. When I’m sixteen, I’ll… Boys whistle, cat calls, mean girls… A kiss stolen. A heart broken. Never be sorry you saved that part of yourself That you alone hold in your power You owe him nothing. You never did.
All we want to do is fit in But then again Do you really want to be defined By sameness? There is no perfect after all But this you can decide The who that you want to be You choose No one else wears your shoes Then find out how best to get to her Knowing the shortest distance between two points Is a straight line… From which you will stray. Because you’re curious about what’s over there. And that’s okay You will trip You may fall Your tears flow But you will get up After all, you know who you want to be See...
It ain’t easy bein’ green When you’re a tween Or a teen Yes, there will always be a test. Most times it’s not about the grade But how you got to the answer. As you journey this life passage Relations change, yet remain the same When little no longer defines you Yet grown ain’t what you are, You have a role in the outcome. You want to be respected You have to respect You want to be trusted Keep your word And lies in check Your actions speak louder than your words If you want to be heard That’s how grown folk listen…or they should. And those younger are watching too. Don’t forget them Or leave them behind They look up to you.
A rite of passage has come It’s you who chooses You have all power To make it a trial by fire Where someone gets burned Or a wondrous journey Full of lessons you’ve learned Including sometimes what not to do By watching those who are older than you. Just wait ‘til I’m eighteen… Moms will always be Moms, Dads will always be Dads, But suddenly they’re smarter And their opinions? Not so bad… Funny how that works. A right of passage Comes with time Responsibility/no response to be Missed takes/ mistakes Curiosity taking a cat life Independence/Dependence Oxymorons/moron’s proxies And sometimes you just want To play with your dolls. And you can.
Be the change you want to see in the world. — Mahatma Gandhi
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