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business and personal development books. For 2007, the Book Summary is facilitated by Denise Davis and this summary is provided by Denise for those who are unable to attend the tele-class. For more information about WIFS, visit www.w-wifs.org or contact us at (866) 264-9437
Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway
Author: Susan Jeffers
Book Summary by Denise Davis, WIFS Book Club Facilitator
Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway is designed to help people grab hold of their fears and live their life the way they want to live it – moving them from a place of pain, paralysis and depression to one of power, energy, and enthusiasm. Our inability to deal with fear (educational or psychological) We learned that we can reeducate our mind. We can accept fear simply as a fact of life rather than a barrier to success. We can unlearn the thinking that keeps us a prisoner in our own insecurities. Discovering our fears and the three levels of fear 1) Level One Fears: Fear that permeates many areas of our life (Those that “Happen” – aging, becoming disabled, war, etc. and those that “Require Action” – changing careers, loosing weight, using the telephone, etc.) 2) Level Two Fears: These fears have to do with our “inner state of mind” rather than our exterior situations – rejection, success, failure… 3) Level Three Fears: I can’t handle it! (At the bottom of every one of our fears is simply the fear that we can’t handle whatever life may bring us). Does Fear ever go away (five truths about fear) Truth #1 - The fear will never go away as long as you continue to grow. Truth #2 - The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it. Truth #3 - The only way to feel better about yourself is to go out…and do it! Make deposits into our self-confidence bank. Truth #4 – Not only am I going to experience fear whenever I’m on unfamiliar territory, but so is everyone else. Truth #5 – Pushing through the fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that come from a feeling of helplessness. Moving from pain to power (our vocabulary) We learned to start eliminating from our vocabulary words that imply PAIN (I can’t, I should, It’s a problem) and start replacing them with words that give us POWER and choices (I won’t, I could, It’s an opportunity).
having. • Seek out strong. When we handle our fears in a way that allows us to reach our goals our selfesteem is considerably raised. nutritious co-workers. inspirational books (your own so you can highlight and mark in them). friends who are farther along in the journey than you. About 90% of what we worry about ever happens. We will lean towards passive behavior when we are not quite sure of ourselves and feel the need to defend our behavior. We will begin to draw more positive people into our lives. a good coach. Our mind reacts to what we feed it. Question: how do you feel when you are around negative. no matter what happens. Learn to respond to your significant others in a way that is positive and uplifting. • Strive for healthy assertiveness. 112-115 It is our choice to live in a “no-lose” world. complaining people? Positive thinking toolbox – tape or CD player. and we will silence the negative chatterbox in our head. That’s when we will tend to lash out at those who don’t support us or when our statements become obnoxious and hurtful. How to make a no-lose decision – Two models on pgs. we will feel better physically. 2 . supportive people: mentors. and clients. Do not put yourself down. We create our own reality: when we learn to handle our fear. We lean towards aggressive behavior when we are hanging on to our new behavior for dear life. inspiring. you will automatically draw and be drawn to more positive people. Let them know how much you appreciate them. Our fears will begin to diminish. we move from a position of pain to one of power! Myth: negative talk = reality and positive talk = unrealistic – Not true. depressed. 80 for examples ) If we will commit to a positive thinking program and routine it will change our lives. It’s the way we think about outcomes and opportunities. their support. healthier ones. you will be more aware of the kind of people you are around and whether they exude a negative or positive behavior and speech. inspirational tapes or CD’s.Taking responsibility We don’t blame others for anything we are being. statements of affirmation (pg. • Be your own best friend. When “They” don’t want you to grow…when significant people in your life don’t want you to change or grow – how do we handle that? • Awareness…are you a member of the moan-and-groan club or crowd? As you become more positive. • Acknowledge others when they are supporting you. We will begin to gain the power we need to handle whatever life throws at us. Our energy will increase. friends. doing. or feeling We do not beat up on ourselves We are aware of when we are not taking responsibility so we can change We are handling the “chatterbox” in our head We are aware of the payoff that is keeping us stuck We are setting goals and working towards them We understand that we have choices in any given situation “Fear (whatever yours happens to be) is holding you back from experiencing life the way you want to”. positive quotes. Your new strength will help you break unhealthy ties and establish new. We learn to trust that we will survive. That means our negative worries only have a bout a 10% chance of being correct! A positive outlook can create a very “realistic” life of joy and satisfaction. Stop feeding yourself negative thoughts. and their willingness to help you grow. motivating. index cards.
Commit to learning how to bring whatever you do in life the loving and powerful energy of your Higher Self.” think how fearful you will become. Being impatient is a way of punishing yourself. • Give Away Thanks • Give Away Information • Give Away Praise • Give Away Time • Give Away Money • Give Away Love Your life is abundant. There is Plenty of Time “One of the biggest pitfalls as you make your way through life is impatience”. Consciously accept what is happening in your life. Our Subconscious Mind listens to the Conscious Mind and carries out the instructions given. 193). Say yes to instead of “no” to the things life brings us that is beyond our control. Commit yourself to pushing through the fear and becoming more than you are at the present moment. It then sends this information to our Subconscious Mind. and you count! You must become what you want to attract. Saying NO implies we are a victim. Keep asking yourself. Until then. Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway. Acknowledge the pain – denying it can be deadly. Our Subconscious Mind chooses its source of information and energy from either our Higher Self (a source of positive thoughts and positive energy) or our Chatterbox (source of negative thoughts and negative energy). share your grid with someone you trust. read it daily. Steps to saying YES… • Create awareness that you have a choice in saying yes or no. When you are ready to move forward – you will. Page 210 list great examples of when we are tuned into our Chatterbox and when we are tuned into our Higher Self. more usually comes back to us than we could ever have imagined. It takes time to adopt a “yes” approach to life. “How whole is my life?” Continue to create richness for yourself that nothing can ever take away your basic sense of completeness. rather than from a place of expectation. • Be patient with yourself. 3 . Filling the Inner Void The author refers to this as our “Higher Self” (Inner Self.” Look for the value in the experience. Remember that life is an ongoing process of learning so refuse to beat up on yourself for not having “made it” yet. • Go with the flow…like a river…we can not push the water up stream. “Say ‘yes’ to your universe”. satisfaction and connectedness we are all seeking.How whole is your “Whole Life”? – Example on page 138-139 Create what you want in each area of your life – set goals & action steps. Whatever it takes to get you there. Choosing Love and Trust If all of your “giving” is about “getting. Saying YES is our hope. we will never experience the kind of joy. (See diagram on pg. God-self). Saying yes means getting up and acting on your belief that you can create meaning and purpose in whatever life hands you. Be the kind of person you would want to surround yourself with. Just nod your head and say “Yes!” Janet Zuckerman. When we give from a place of love. If we do not consciously and consistently focus on the spiritual part of ourselves. • Nod your head and say yes – physically do this • Relax your body • Adopt an attitude of “Let’s see what good will come from this situation. keep taking it in and keep learning. It is then that you will realize how little you have to fear. find an accountability partner.
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