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HOW'TO WIN YOUR

W'IFE'S lI,EART'
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35
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HOW TO WIN -YOUR WIFE'S HEART ••••.••••.•... ~
IN:rRODUCDON ;.,i.~~~ -••• ~.' "flow TO WIN YOURWIFEtS i-ffiART" ,
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A MESSAGE FROM THE PUBLISHERS .:•,_ . STQRlESFROM THEPREDECESSORS HOW ~ ~ ~

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THE COMPANIONS
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THE',QUALITIESOF THOSE WITll·TAQWA
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by; Ibraahim Ibn Saalehal .. ahmud M

lntroduction
All praise' is doe to Allah who says:

,i;An4 among

His$igns

is this, that He

created .for you wives from among yourselves" that you may find_ repose in them, and He bas put between YQtl

affection and .mercy"
[Surah Ar-Rum:verse 21 ], and Peace and Blessing be upon out prophet Muhammad' who' said:'ithe best of you is', one who is best with one's household (in treatment) .and lam best of you to my household", reporteaby Ai-Tirmidih. and others.

To proceed:
Today, if we look at people's lives, we will be disappointed and feel distressed because sins, forbidden actions and misdeeds have become widespread. Concepts that were once common among Some _people havechanged, the evil has become thegoodand the good has become the evil..

Traditionsandethles have alsochanged. Accordingly, people become influencedand fascinated by the ideas ofWestem';dvilization :an0 affected by dirty and .indecent movies which look at betrayal as love,
ll

disintegration as freedom and openness, respect for the husband as backwardness and complexity: and the

5

misfortunes have: increased. Trays of gold and cups will be passed round them.husband ignores and oppresses his wife! • • 'The. I'have prepared this 'paper '~()W towbt your wife"s heart'" reigned by admiration. 'sayings of the worthy ancestors. As a result. Whose Reference is:.children are disobedient to theirparents! The parents ignore their children's education! These problems. in happiness. Whose. In order to help in the construction of the ideal Muslim home.understanding between the husband and wife as weakness. love. commitment.are only caused by Muslims' disobedience to Allah's rules.therein'~ 6 . respect. its aim is to create a solid. Whose· slQganis: religion is sincerity. • • The wife does not fulfil the rights of her husband!' The. mental tranquillity and happiness. sincere and understanding Mnstim family. (there will be). is: that' they will be called on the Day of Judgement to: Enter Paradise. Goal is: a righteducation for the children. YOll and YOllr Wives. It is among the series of the happy Muslim family. disasters diffused and Muslims have become tense-and confused. the Sunnah and the Whose Aspiration. the Qur'an.

She "isthe school that was once spoken of thus: 7 .rsomemen. [Az-zukhruf: 70 ·.that the one's inner-selves could desire. a smile and true love. Accordingly. emotional and cannot bear a his voice andshowinghis muscles. She needsaffection. She needs safe direction and the right advic. compassion. men I am addressing this p~per. She needs his careall the time. For example. They raise their voices forno reason. affectionate.and_ she needs to be addressed with wisdom. thatsome husbands show towards their wives. and you will abide therein forever. his companions.e.-711~ Whose M04d is: the Prophet (A). distress and misery and destroy theirspirits. do not share with their wives the good and bad things and prefer to spend the night with their friends and travelthan to look after their families and their wives. may AJJah guide them" do not fulfil their wivesrights and do not care about them. the negligence of eachpartner's rights towards the other and the low esteem. Among other reasons that prompted me to prepare this paper is the increase in the number of divorce eases land of 'marriage problems. all that theeyes could delight Ia. tenderness and the proper style because she is the mother of the children. their behaviour leads the wives to live in a state of anxiety. to those Lsay: A man when raising woman is weak. the followers and those who follow his footstepswith sincerity tillthe Day of Judgement. So.

8 .'To anyone who wants to ~e his house a cultural source for calling people. the maste r of all teachers She occupies theirglorious deeds in aU hori~ijns This 'letter is also: addressed. • To anyone who wants to make his: house a model for marital happiness and a school to raise pious' and righteous offspring. Toanyone who wants to lead his married life in the right path and to Paradise. To anyone who wants to live a peaceful.. tofollow the! commandments of Allah and for-enjoining good and forbidding evil. • • meaningful and a pleasant life. .The motheris a school' if you lookafte r he") you will get a people of noble desce-nt The:mother is like a garden ifshawered with water.putforth abundant leaves The mother is. it will. happy.

obliged us with trust and loyalty.8 all happiness in this world and in the Hereafter. I ask Allah to grant 11. it is appropriate tor us to improve our characters and our behaviortowards our wives'. of Allah be upon our beloved prophet. and offer them what Allah fi has. 9 . MUhammad. and may the Blessing and Peace.So.

Treatine Woman with Kindness Allah. "Allah' smessenger. they insulted and tormented them. arid the' last cOIIU11aDd the Prophet. I said. For they are marriedwomen With you. its' crookedness will remain there.abomination. upon her?".: says: honorably. you. Then. act kindly towards women..Act kindly towards women". If. In . "Act kindly towards women for the woman has been created from a rib and the most. The prophet '. Islam has forbidden such conduct. [An-nisaa: 19]. as a result the house becomes. the Prophet" replied. was: of " . you will break it but if you leave it.0 right against them" i 1 "Many of us have heard stories of men treating their wives badly as if they were slaves: of an oppressive. SQ.. lilt is that you feed her When. 'You have over them except this that they commit some obvious. And Iive'with them The prophet lB' also said: "Beware. said. So act kindly towards women" [agreed upon]. if you attempt to straighten n. they obey you. what is the right of the wife if one of us comes. and insome incidents they' even beat their faces. an unbearable hell"? This behavior is not a quality of the pious men. do not then seek some excuse 1). crooked part 'of arib is its upper part. if they commit that" leave them in beds (alone) and give them a beating without molesting (them). master. take food and provide bet 1 Reported byAt~Tirmidth_ 211Nahwa Usratin M{lslimatin ll ' by Istanbuli. [agreed upon]. Mua'wiya Ibn Ubayda (may Allah be pleased with him) reported.

stronger than her ~ Allah is stronger than us. nor leave her alone except in the house" 3 I remind you to be gentle to your wife. .demand perfection from. children. we are all inthe same-position.are drowned in our own rflaws and shortcomings. T 3 Reported .ryou might cause serious consequences. A man asked al-Hassan Ibnu Ali.bY' at. by Muslim s aldqdul F 'areed by AhJ. If he dislikes any of her characteristics. "The most perfect of the believers in faith is be who is the most excellent of 'them in morals and the best of youare theywho are bestfor their wives 4 II Brother. irmidil: who categorized _it as Hasan. there is no need to . particularly in front of the Muslim Brother.clothes when you clothe yourself and.he will 'be kind to her. because if you underestimate herpersonality. In reality. he will not treat her unjustly" . If we were. 11 . he will be pleased with another one'". 4 Reported . Abu Daawud and Ibnu Maja.. others wlillewe . seizing the vopportunity of the woman's weakness 'and need."] have a' daughter and she is getting married.J1¢d. [f he dislikes her.revile her . nor . The ProphetD said: "A believer must not hate a believing woman.s Reported. but accept what is best! And haven't you thought about yourself whether you are perfect or not. do not beat her face. to Whom shall I give her?Al-Hassan Ibnu Ali then replied: "Marry her to someone who fears Allah~ if he loves her. The Prophet " said. may Allah be pleased with them. that you. treat her nicelyand respect her. do not look forperfection in this universe.

Most Beneficent. The.. of ~thewife:· Lgoodcompany..The.* says: "'And live with them honourably". Wile's Rights. nor leave:her alone Oilier rights. we should ·teach a woman everything she Reported by~at. I said. those who act justly m their judgementr among their family and peoplel!9. what is the right of the wife if'anyone of us comes Upon her?". education.Tirfnitiihand categorized it asSahih sReported by Abu Daawudand others 9 Reponed by Muslim '7 12 .' the right of the . Tan-Nisa: 191 2. says: HAnd they (women) have rightsovertheir husbands similar to those of their husbands over them to what is reasonable. A companion of the Prophet fa reported. He. Allah .. "Ailalis messenger. [AI. "It is that you feed herwhen you take food and provide her clothes when you clothe yourself and that you do not beather face. The wife has several rights over her husband. Allah ~. said: "Youmen have rights over your wives and they have rights over you'". but men .lbnu ab-Baas said: "I like to adorn myself for my wife as t want her to adorn herself for melt. replied.. aqarah:228]. nor revile her... Prophet . B except in the house'" The Prophet A said: "In the-Day of Judgement the fair minded will be upon a dais of light on.have a degree of responSibility over them".

Allah ~' says: "lAnd_give to the women (whom youmarry) thelr dowry with a good heart.~says: "A..agreed upon'.on him greater than be can bear" she wastes the sustenance. and . 5. "If a roan: has 'two wives and does' not deal the' .men andstenes" ta:t-Tahrim:6] 4. No person shall have a burden laid. Prophet~-said: [Al~Baqara:233J. "0 you who believe! Ward C)ft' (rom yourselves and your families a fire {hell) 'whose fuel Is. of their own 'good pleasure." .ndenjoin prayer on your farnily~and be patient in offering themjthe prayers) II TTaha~132] and. Allah ~.bas made it Iawful)' [an--Nisa:4J _ 6"" support.needs regarding deen ~ 3.moderation in jealousy.fairness in division if one has more than onewife. remit any part 01 it to you. but if they. says: -"but the father of the 'child shallbear the cost of the mother's food and clothing ·ODa reasonable basis_.."It is a sufficient sin for a Woman that 7-. The Prophet 6said:. enjoining the good oil her and forbidding the evil.enjQY'it withput fear of' any harm (as Allah. take it. Allah .dowry.

. At -H:. used to help: -his £anrily.' .. visit her parents.i'~~~.~pollZU'. vuiges ner secre..some 'GtOOr wealth unwillingly..-' ". late" the.isthe man who bas se~~ in~ourseOitnaa) with his Wife :~d then he divu .'t.::1 b AI'B' 'l_'l. or ..e]?ortet:tpyMu#im 13 R "..... because this will annoy her and spoil her-life 'andeventnaliy she will: give 'up her wages or-part of it..I s he . 'The Prophet ~. nor her wealth if she-inherits..magazines and dirty tnoV'i~$'.Resurrectloa whi1~-his one Slde MIl be hanging down ~q~~ly . 10. ers.a~"..e .' Y . Prophet A said: 1:3 "your wife has rights overyou" 13." not to seek.0..u_y. nnmea anUi 0th'.J. he ll~~ to mendhis shoes...till. R.. . . p~cb hisclothes and sweep 'tile fioo]J) 9~ not to divulge' her secrets. 10 R'-..~deeth . ..~ __ \V?I come '~n(he ~~6of 8'" to slop treating be(badlyand to respect bet feelings. 12'" not to' spendthe night-out ...&~. . n:eighbt)tlrs.~ __ • .u1 by' v. on the Day of Resurrection .. to take 'his wife's wage$! Q$~' isworking.i' '' . '.... the Prophet • said:' "The worstofmankind in rank in the sight of Allah. ':. and not tQaJlow her to 'buy indecent. 1l 1~ ' O1'P:'d' 'l'InI\ .:D. .... her family and h~ wife against mixing with women engaged in evil talk and deed's or those of ill repute.epC:fI u:.t-o aUQW bet II-to 'protect his to. ulCftuan 14 . "U .." :.~etW~n_!he~ ~. nor mention her flaws..

not to divulge eaoh others secrets. L4 R' [.. 2. and 'wife parti cul arly . S.to educate their children ... 3.. eportee l.to appreciate and respect each Other. oecupying theirspare time with useful Islamic books and cassettes.. 4. emotional participation in happiness and sorrow. • avoid' buying dirty and indecent magazines of artists. to overlook mistakes and errors. particularly theirdaughters. The parents should be concerned about their children's education.to live-honourably. common to huSband 1-. 7. M usum vY'_ .to dress. The Prophet • said: "fie who brings' Up twogirls properly until they have grown up. footballersand clubs.!. )"14 Therefore.. 5. the unintentional ones.according to Islamic teachings. he and I would come (very 'close)... we should take into consideration the following points: • • • • encouraging the girls to wear Hijah.Rigbts. this: will protect their chastity. not speak ill of each other before people. nicely . 6. and he interlaced his fingers (for explaining the paint of nearness betwecn ihirn and' that one.. discouraging them from dressing indecently.. avoid buying tapes ofmusic 81)d _musicinstruments.. on the Day of Resurrect reo.to give-each other sincere advice.I 15 ..

The Prophet ~ used to a man". has to In addition. Oroar" said: "A man should be like a.MarrlageProblems' l-sins and misdeeds 2. respect heropinion. and invite.relatives interference 5. any matter considered in our Deen. he should act like because this makes her cheerful. and tradition to be good should be adopted in their marriage relation. exchange visits.vand ·accept 'her advice _if it was' right. He treat her family kindly by praising them in front of her. The Causes of. soothe herpains and to relieve: her of the burdens of life and work because all this.devilish insinuation irresponsibility 16 .Treatin2 'the wife with kindness The wife bas to be loved by her husband. The husband should have a sense of humour to 'cheer his wife. He should call her QYher best name and treat ber with deference. In short. will strengthen the bonds of love and respect between them. be bas tel show noble character.negligence 3- 4'. child With his wives.reprehensible jealousy 6. but if they need him.them' in every occasion. with his wives. more than that be has to joke and play withher joke. be has to listen to her. endure her problems and show' clemency in time of her recklessness and anger. Also.

education difference 1'9.frequentabsence fromthe house 24.interference in other'sbusiness 8.lack ofsincerity and truthfulness 15.the.1.the influence of neighbours 16.preference of some 'children to-others 23.age difference 20-mixedgatherings' of men and women 21.dis-satisfaction with worldly matters 17~social class difference 18.frequent nights out 25.travelling abroad for 'bad purpose.distrust 1a. 9. misunderstanding of each other'scharacter and mental non-congruence 11.false beliefs 12~monotony of everyday life 13-:dkty magazines and movies' 14. Z2~unequal treatment between the wives 17 .the exertion of auth9t:ity of one of the couple.

Consequently. now they do not care anymore about them nor about the children.and dignity towards Allah and His· servants. and is inflicted by a curse when he commitsa. because the most revered . Theservant of Allah loses: Allah's blessing by a sin.TbeEpidemicOfSins Sins and forbidden actions are considered to be one 'of the' most serious causes of marriage problemsand its spread among Muslims.she should aSK herself and read Allah's saying in the Qu'ran: Verily!' Allah will not change the good condition of a people. obeys Him it) everything. lbnul Qayyim 'Said:' "Among' the punishments originated from sins is that they revoke the blessings and cause curses. hut. 'They reminisce-the sweet moments they passed-and the love they 'used to share together. he will live among them in a bad predicament. i Sheikh Ahmad Al-Qattaan said: "The wife is the reason behind her husband'ssudden ehange. and the position of a servant is established by his submission to Allah's commands.sin". as long as they do riot 18 .person tID Allah ~ 'is the one who feats Him most. who. line disobeys Allah's commands. Some wives often complain about their husbands' sudden change. unrespeeted and And among' the punishments Inflicted on a sinner: He 'loses his tank. Allah ~as well as the people attach no importance to a sinner. position . the closest one to Him is the one unhappy.ntiserable. he will be dropped in His estimation and Allah will also drop himin His servants estimation. underestimated.

their state Qfgoodness themselves [Ar-Raad:l1J.' • • • • • Backbiting Usury The watching of dirty movies-and listening to music Employing a maid and car-driver' unnecessarily. happiness familyand the house.. The reasons behind the marriage problems: ·. Not encouraging their daughters to wear Hijaabwhen they reach the age of puberty.change. . it is because either she or her husband bas committeda sin. parents. Therefore. Perhaps. The breaking ofrelations.and other Islamic obligations such as Zakiit. fasting and pilgrimage. Making fun of religious people and of Islam Smoking and drinking intoxicant. to fulfil our ISlamic duties and abstain {rom forbidden actions. it IS obligatory to examine and correct ourselves. will return to the 19 . The wife'sdelay to take a bath so as to keep her hair done. and ill Allah'swilling. • Disobeying the.The • • • • worst is abandoning prayers . Hiding the children's wrong doingsfrom their father.

If . [AI""Mwntahinah. and to . ·Ni:l'saaiand others. you are-obliged .: fO·r .}jim to Kuft".such is the cas~. Also.(Q hate him fOJr the fr(jID him~. .then your husband isa Kq!tt(disbelieve() husbandsmisbehaviour._ .Y0U have togo to your family lor anywhere: where. get out from every lean upon Allah ~ and save you to h~lpyou in your: problem. 'the insultof the' deen 'isconsidered by all Mnsfitns to be .Ali lmportantFatwa This question was answered by.the scholar Sheikh Abdul Ariz Ibn Baaz afteF a: . reported by Titmidht. from your husband's' misdeeds..tnvide him from (sources) he never could imagine: IA-t-TaZaaq:2J. 'Therefot~..Allah.veS) for the abandoning of prayer".He WUIp. the Prophet ._ I _~ • -."~· And whoever fearsAlIah'an. ~ . In addition. SO.. and it is' unlawful to live or stay with him in the same house.woman complained vabout her You said in your question that your husband has abandoned prayers and insults the l)CJ!1J. "(The diStinctiob) between matiMa polytheism and KIfr' is .~ says: disbelievers· 'nor are the Dlsbellesers lawful (husbands)r_for them.: 10]. And. you -feel safe because Allah . ~ said. - Th~y are not Jawt\il (wi.kel\pS hls duty tollimjlle will makea way dlfDc1:llty..a _majpt sake of Al1till and be separated ·says.

21 .guide him to the right path and grant him repentance. Most Generous. fIe is the.

"How-do you know that?" He said: "men you are pleased with me" you say.. face of Suwayda and Suwaydastained the face of Aisha. But.$ narrated that Allah's messenger . She said. 1 raced him and he beat me.ake$ up' for that beating" 16 In. "No. "The Prophet. are.. 'OAllab's messenger. 15 L~ Agreed upon Reportedby Ahmad. He started laughing and said: "This m. I said: "Yes. used to wash himself tog¢ther with one of his wives from the Same. I raced him on foot and I beat him. "I wasnot bulky. this race. me: "come and race me". Aisba. Thereupon.he told his companion to move forward and they-did. Hethen told.·15' She also reported that she was with ." I said. l:..The Exuberant Husband Aisha . angry with me. on 'another journey. you ate right. I leave nothing but your llanre. and the Prophet. no-by the Lord of Ibrahim" . the Prophet. started laughmg". Abu Daawud and others'.·said: til know' when Y0I. said: . vessel" l7. intends to teach the married couple bow toenjoy leach other's company.11 stained the. by the Lord of Muharnmadcbut when you. 'They could perform some innocent activities andentertainment together so thatthey would not feel bored. Reported by Al-Bukhaari. by Allah.t 22 . then you say.L are pleased with rile or angry with me.Atlah's messenger during a journey. he asked me to race him. when I became bulky.

132J. and be patient inoffe. .ring. 'The Prophet fI said: "Teach them and punish them".He prayers deserves punishment even has to be killed if be persists in abandoningprayers. he would say: I am her husband. Ifanybody asked him to move: from this house. However.do ·so? 23 . alit if she refuses to do so.them (the-prayers]". because anyone whoabandons as agreed by all MiJ. [Taaha·. and yourselves and your ·family·a fire whose fuel.sfuns. Ifshe does not want to. and. should he leave her or not? Answer 1: Yes. Did he have the right to .Allah ·~said: "And enjoin prayer on your family. . the husband has to induce hertopray 'by asking her kindly. he even has to order other people if he can because . her master and the master of the house. he bas to divorce her.ImoortantQuestions Question 1: Sheikh al-Islarn Ahmad IbnuTaymiyya was asked about a woman who does l)otpray. for he is considered a Kafir (disbelieverjand apostate according to two famous accounts and Allah knows best Question 2: Sheikh al-Islam Ibnu Tayrniyya was asked about a man who took his wife to live in a place full offilthy people and often took her outside and meet indecent people. "0 you who believe! Ward Qff from is menand stones" [At-Tahreem~6]. the husband should order his wife to pray.should her husband order her to pray".

Answer 2: All praise be to Allah, the Lord of the world, this
man has no right to force his wife to livewherever he likes, nor take her and mix with sinners and evil-doers. Instead, . .he has to find b~t a decent and nice place that suits her.and keep away from wicked people, and if not, hehas te be punished twice: one. for the. sins he committed and one for not safeguarding .his wife's. 'honour and for taking her to corrupt places. This punishment will prevent him. and anybody who may try to do: the same thing for his wife. And Allah knows best.
QUeStion 3: Although my husband,may Allah forgive him,

does not care aboutme at all in the bouse. He is always angry and annoyed. You might say I am responsible for that; but, Allah .~ knows that I fulfil aU my duties towards him, always 'endeavour to provide all means of peace and rest and endure his misbehaviour. However, wheneverI ask him about anything or talk to him about a matter, be becomes irritated and shoutedthis is' stupid and silly, whereas when he is with his friends, he becomes happy and cheerful. As forvme, I onl y receive reprimands and ill-treatment, and feel tormented and sad; more than tbat, 'I often. think of leaving the-house; I have 1ittle education but 1 do, .all my obligations assigned by Allah. His Eminence the Sheikh, Do I sin If I 'leave the house and bring up mycbildrenand bear the responsibility of life alone? Or shall I ·stay with him in this situation and not bother "totalk: to him and share his feelings andproblems?

IS endowed with noble character and fear' of Allah, but he

24

Help me, what shall I do? May Allah bless you.
Answ~r

couple to-five honcurablyand to share mptuaI love and
noblecharacter forAUah,~says:

3: WiiliQllt doubt, 'it j~-Qb1igaJQZYfQIfhe married

And :1iN'ewith them honourably
'~n~NslUl··:19]

andalso

ADd they,. women, have: rights over their husbands as ~regal'ds .I!iVfug expenses, etc, similar to those-ot 'their h1J$bitn..~v~r them as regards .obedience and respect, etc. to what is reasonable

'W-8aqa raha28}
J

The Prophet • said: "Righteousness is the most noble character", reported }!)y Muslim;aiso,. the Prophet ~. said: "The most perfect. of the believers. in faith is he who, is most excellentof them in moralsand the. best of you .are they who

are:bestofyou to their Wive$,;.alidI am best ofyou to my household", reported by M#.slim. Thete are many more conduct and behaviour between Muslims in general and between married cotlpies and relatives in particular.
hadith that indicate. the necessity for noble character, good

You have been excellent by patiently bearing, your husband's misbehaviour .and ill-treatment. But" ladvise you to be morepatientand not to leave the house and If Allah

wills you will be-rewarded for yourpatieneebeeause
,~d he patient.

Allah

.s:ay&:
SUrely" ,ADahis:mt.h those

Who are-patient

.[Al-:Anfaal':461

25

Verily, he who fears Allah with obedience to Him, by: abstaining Irom sins and evil deeds, and by peno'l"lllil)g righ~usgood deeds,

and is patient,then surely, ADah makes not the reward of the good-doers to be lost [Yusuft90] and
Only those who are patient shall receive

their rewards in full without reckoning
[Az-:zumar: 10]

and

.So, be patient. Sur~ly,the good end is for the piousand righteous; persons
[l1ud:49]

Hence, there is' no harm in playing with .him and in your conversation. try' to, be gentleand use words that will soften his heart, make him feel happy and observe your rights over him. Inaddition, do' riot .ask him about worldly needs as,

long ashefulfilsessential

duties-and afterwards, when he:is

delighted he will carry out all your requirements. I call upon Allah to help you 'succeed inreforming yow husband's conduct andbehaviour, ,to h~lp,him come to his senses and to' bestow upon him noble character, cheerfulness and to respect your rights. is the most Answerable and

He

theGuide.

Question 4: My husband.often gets angry for silly reason, 'and I can not bear his 'anger, so I retaliate. Unfortunately, he becomes more. angry and furious, and it results in an argument between us which could last for hours.

26

A 'husband threatens' with divorce!!'! :. He threatens his wife With divorce. particularly in this era where: man faces many problems at work every day and suppress them till he comes borne where he takes out hisanger and frustration on his wife's and children's faces for silly reason.Answer 4: Sister. the solution. Therefore. she could tell him: "Allah forgive you". but.. even this action mightnot restrain his anger. Instead. you ate not the only one who' is suffering from this problem" but a lot ofwives feel the same. However. is that the wife should not meet her husband with the same furious temper.. like "I all) to blame". and your rnarriage will be safe after these tense' and uneasy moments. He will feel ashamed and respect you. 01L Consequently.. What I am saying is not a justificstion for the husband's actions. people 27 . "I have been. negligent" and so. minutes will pass and at the most half an -hour"then your husband will become composed and remember his enraged state and your composure towards his bad temper.for silly things H He threatens with divorce if there is a simple misunderstanding! 1 He threatens with: divorce if the children 'cry !! He threatens with divorce if the children break a glass or a cup]! • • • • He threatened with divorce if his wife forgets to bring 1.'~n ~~ ihirtl! . butomyan explanation to the angry' state that. This is one of the funniest and rare stone's about the. descend unexpectedly -apon the poor wife. Which I think. you have to be more patient and remain 'firm and Use other apologies..

This incident took place within earshot of his neighbour. you-would have been just with her".are divorced. by Allah they were both nice to you and bener thanyou. home and found them arguing" and be was . "you are also divorced". the Arabs could only confirm your weakness and the weakness. who enumerate their merits. if you punished her otherwise. Wise brother: D() not allow your bouse to be reigned by anxiety and 28 .and he divorces h¢t. I agree".of your people 'when they experience your conduct and behaviour. I agree. He said:'ry ouarealsodivorced if your husband allows me". you can only divorce them He: then told her: iiy ou are divorcedas well". how come he has five-?~ The man said: There was: an Arab who had four-women. she came to him and said: "By Allah. In one of their coUvers.a. Arrasheed then said: A mancan only have fum WOmen. but he told 'her: You too. her 'husband replied froth within the house: "Yes. Hethen told her. man told Arrasheed. Commander of the Faithful: I 'Was informed.ill-namred. One day he 'came.had divorced five women in one day. that an Arab . Her friend told him: "you have unfairly divorced her. The fourth wife said angrily: " II It • 'You are unable to discipline your wives. you insisted on divorcing all your four wives in one hour. he told himself: How long will this dispute g£lr on? He told {me of his foul' wives vyounre jhe one responsible for this dispute.who threaten with divorce.ati01)s. 'The thirdone told him: Shame on you.

di'Stress. and this problem Should beavoidedbecause some Mu.Muslhns. What can she tell 'the. Awifeuleadingwithker husband 'not to travel:!. the problem of swearing to divorce one's wife which has prevailed among many . an irrevocable divorce. When the husband travels awayJ1is wife: remains anxious.aforementioned story.to them? Can she deceive bitterness. children when th~y ask 'herself? She is embarrassed. What can: she do? How can she manage? She falls into a critical situation with her 'famity. Make your Iifefullof love" harmony r understanding and respect and take a: lesson from the. Wba'~is worth mentionin~ is.figlits the ardouriof love aridswaJ1ow.'. be has flown away" "He left-andsetfire to my heart' "Do not askme about 'him. worried and miserable! "DQ not ask me-about him. :Fo{silly reasons" Some men will sweat to-divorce their" wives. I feel thesadnessin my heart is deep" grief .s about theirfather? Canshe 1i~.and feels ashamed. of her children! 8he.inside and "'00 not ask me about him when he says farewell I sensed in his words deception and secrets" 29 .sUm scholars conclude that it is.

and excuses" warmth he will forget the children and the house": "He left to sleep .~'FIe and in the children's eyes questions left Which Lanswerwith lies . in whose 30 .inanother woman's arms.

(legal and allowed) and seeks Haram (forbidden). he was still immersed in his 010 bad habit. sooner bad he touched her than the man who. 'TIle Angel of Death took 'his soul and the dead man was returned to hiscountry in his coffin. There' was a married unfortunately. No. ] Write this story about a rnan who. Asia. had'<children. I ask-Allah ~ safety and good health. 31 .has given them. but. For you brother. another one in Eastern. took him to her room. the Angel of Death was waiting for him. and h~ Was' still YQUng and full of life. be it Halal or Harzam. In one of his' 'evening parties.aIl husbands: Fear Allah with regard to your wives. He left behind virtue and run after depravity. decisive moment carne. Protect them and give them their rights that Allah .To. abandons what is Halal. He travelled from his country to. he met a prostitute dancer who. He thought only about his pleasure and desire.

ifAllah wills.to receive Allah's reward is regarded as Sadaqa (Act of charity).Whatever you spend on your wife intending . session with your family at borne. in faith is he who is most excellentof them in morals and the best of youare they who are best of you. if you follow. 9.Be gentle with your wife and children. 12. Religi.to their wives. 16.Do not buy indecent-clothes foryourdaughters.on'is sincerity 2. 32 . '1.Do not use. be informed about your marriage problems. S. 5. youwill. 15. to Islamic teachings.Do not insult your wife. 10". 3. 14-Organize an Islamic.Avoidbuying clothes with pictures.Love each-other and be calm.Educate your children according: 11.The most perfect of the believers. 17~Adorn yourself for your wife. 6. live with your wife in happiness and!harmony: My brother.Nobody should. 1would like to mention to you some advice Which.Minimize your visits to markets.Always smile in front of your wife.obscene language with your wife's relatives.Beware of avarice 4. the husband: 1".Conclusion At the end of this message.Do not beat your wife without reason. 13.

.- " . . . ." -. ..-. . _"_..t/ian .."". "Ii 33 ." i ~.

the colourof' the colour and the form. the. . we are a middle U'nlll1ii:h in everything.'to rel!inquishyoul' guardianship. furniture. best of affairs is to follow:til course middle. car.He is the Guide to the straight path. either extreme or negligent in' dealing willi the subject of 'guardianShip. ] call UPQtiAllah '~' .to'gtant all Muslims happiness in this. the 'house: or 'some clothes. world and ill the Hetea£tex. However. Unfortunately. if some 'men want to' buy a.To . Other men are firmand will not seek thek'WiYesopirri'on at all. a lot of people are. they let their wives alonechoose 34 .gain yOU! wife'sheart does not mean . change . Because. For example.to give up your rights or.

35 . the companions: . To this end.of the Prophet i) in their practice of Islam and their rememberance of Allah.9! Message from the Pub[isliers Dear Brothers. A-l-Eirdous here presents some authentic stories of the 'Companions of the Prophet and the pions predecessors.. happiness rand success for himself and his family. in both this life and the hereafter should seek to follow the example of the best of generations. whoever amongst you wishes to gain peace.

You will not be able to resist so how do you expect to save yourself The man said: 'Enough.Ibrahim • said: 'If you accept five practices and remain steadfast on them.When the angels of Hell Come to escort you to HeU. If you want todisobeyAllah. I will make a 18 This 'Chapter is taken from Chapter 9 of Sincere Repentance Al. Inform. don't follow them. How can you bite the hands that feed you? 2. How can you (have the audacity to) commit a sin when He is always Present in front of you? 4. And if you (are such an ingrate) and still wish to disobey Him. The' angel will . nothing will harm and no (sinful) pleasurewilldestroy you: 1. not live in a place that He owns. If you 'want to disobey 1\[131).S toties from tlie Predecessots'" A man went to Ibrahim ibn Adliani$ and said: '. enough Ibrahim..- Firdous Ltd. r . then do not eat fromHls provisions. 36 .not grant you your desire and will immediately dispatch your soul to the next world. When {he: Angel taking yoursoul of Death arrivescask him to delay for a while $0 mat yQu are 'able to make a siucererepentance and perform some good deeds for Allah. then find a place where you can do so inconspicuously. then do.0 Abu Ishaq I transgress againsr rnyself tby committing sins}. 1995. me of a deterrent that Win deliver my heart. How can you expect to escape? 5. Howcan 'you eat and live off 'Someone you wish to disobey? 3.

derelict place nearby.ail was so taken in by the verse that he immediately repented and spent the.and his sayings are still quoted 20 to da y. He will rob you!" Fudail shouted: "Fudailhas repented] "Hepromised the travellers safe passage.. 37 . 1 then acquired a maid who was very good ro me. was asked about the reason behind his repentance. One night as he was scaling.a beacon Of guidance . Anightmare that prompted the repentance of a great sage: Malik ibn' Dinar . t}l¢ walls of the young. he heard a few travellers shout: "Beware. I became even more fond of bet when she started 19 MuwaqifMushriqah 20 Ibid: 24 Fi Hayatis Salaf: 15 . be heard someone reciting (57:16): the following verse of Surah Hadeed ~Is not time forbellevers to "Subject 'their hearts to it the remembrance of AOah" ••' Fud.sincere repentance right now.. used to bea highway robber and was madly in love with a young woman. Later in the night. He said: I used to be a POliCelUlID and ail alcoholic.' The mandid soandstayed 'with Ibrahim ~ until-death separated them. 19' Fudail ibn' Ayad •. woman's house. beware! Fudail is ahead of you. night in '3. Fudail ibn'Ayad·~ became . She bore a daughter of ours to whom I became very attached.

I found myself on top of a valley of fire. Again" he started. I heard someone shouting: 'Get .area. he did tell me :to keep on running in the hope that I would find something thatwould save me from the snake. I continued to run and climbed on top of an elevated. I went to sleep' drunk and without offering my prayers. she would come and drag my tumbler away from me and spill everything over my clothes. that yeat on a Friday. However. ' I foundse. graves were resurrected and people were being.say that he was very weak and that the snake was far stronger than he. I then encountered an old' man who was well dressedand Wore goodperfume. You don't belong diere.to -erawl. I greeted him and asked him to help me. Thehorror of the fire alone made me almost fall into it-Then. Whenever I used to serve myself wine. I heard a hissing noise behind. gathered and I Was among them. Then" the old man directed me. 38 . I started to run away as fast as t could trembling with fear. I saw in a dream (bat the Day of Judgement had come about: the Trumpet was blown.curity in {hat stiou: and ran further with the snake still at my heels. 1 found the old man again and pleaded with him to help. to cry and . I turned around and saw that 1Was being approached by a huge black and blue snake. the snake was muchstrongerthan he. The old rnancried and said that he was very weak and. towards a hillwhere he said I might find a deposit of mine that could help me.away from there. Our daughter died when she rurned two and I was devastated. The 15th of Sha'ban came along.

J looked at the hill which Was circularand made of silver. to defend me against my 'bad deeds.hi m . stroked her right hand through my beard and said: "0 father: 'Is it not time for believers to subject their hearts remembrance of Allah.pool of light (noor). She then appeared in front of me and extended one of her hands tome. In the hillwere pierced windows and hanging curtains.they carne and looked from their windows ~-hundreds of them. She explained that it: represented my bad. .An angel then cried: 'Raise the curtains.. Then .and. · So . ·She informed me that: they were the deceased 'children 39 .deeds which would drive me into Hell. I then asked her about the snake that ran after me. Perhaps this afflicted person has some sort of deposit here that can help him.hung on to her.one of them shouted: 'What's wrong with you all. 'She put her other hand in front of the snake: and drove it away. she cried and said: 'By Allahf That is my father. I qttickly ran towards the hill .' She then shot out of the window like an arrow from a bow and jumped into a . Hisenemy has almostcome upon and look. Ithen enquired about the old matt She said ·be was my good deeds which had become so weak that they were up-able. When. She then made me sit down and sat herself in my lap. Then.' I then saw faces of .peeping out from the windows. I then asked what they were doing inside this hill. Every window had two golden panels and each panel was adomed with silk curtains. she saw me. I saw the face of mydaughter who had died.small ." to the I started to cry and asked bow she knew the Quran. Come quickly. Open the panels children who Were like small moons. I grabbed. She said they (the children) knew more than they (in the world) did.

'The very same Malik ibn Dinar ~ says that he was once walking through an alley of Basrawhen he saw a beautiful regal maid riding and beingescorted by several servants.This was how. the maieJ informed . She laughed. master asked him.' Everybody in the room burst into Iaughter. 21 Ibid: 49 40 . Malik was brought ia and had an immediate impact on the 'Yesl Even better than you.2. 'If he does. -I repented. 'Can. 'Will your master sell you?' Malik asked again. Malik.saythat old matl?'$e replied..and asked her servants to escort Malik to her quarters . than two rotten date pits. 'Sell me your maid. them. called out to her and said: '0 maid! Win your master sell you?' 'How can you . .' master. They would intercede for their parents on the Day of Judgement.hat do you: want?' the.her master who.' Malik said. 'How canher price be that. you afford to buy her?' 'To me she is worth no mote. are the likes of you. 'W.' they all asked mockingly. going to buy?"sbeasked. On arriving at her place. for their parents to join. Malik said: '1 woke up in fright. also laughed '~9 asked to see Malik. 1 smashed all mf wine containers and repented.of Muslims waiting.

if she were to speak: to the dead. if she appeared at night. bitter 'water.you.' 'Very cheap. it becomes infested with lice and disheveled.formuch cheaper than what you want for your maid·.old woman . they would respond (to the melody of her voice).someone else just like you. it would become sweet. 'Then you should know that she is very affordable and accessible. She is a maid who has been nurtured in musk and saffron. Spare a moment at night and offer two units of prayer with sincerity. She probably isn't loyal to you and if you die before her. urinates and defecates. her teeth give off foul_ odour. she does not wear perfume her perspiration stinks. If she lives fora few more years. If she does not groom her hair. in salty.her defects' be?' -Malik. 'And 'If Just 'what might. she will find . Perhaps she only likes you for iselfish reasons. raised in gardens and t suckled by the waters of Tasneem (Waters of Paradise). 'The one you described. it would lose it shine.' the-master conceded.amaid whose constitution is of pure camphor: if she were to mix her expectorate. .' said 'If she does not brush her teeth. ram iA a position to buy . Which one of these maids is more deserving of 'a price?' Malik concluded. If she raised her hand toward the SUp. ' 'What is her price?' May Allah' have mercy on .' Malik retorted. she will becomean. her love fOT you will never falter.. She menstruates.'Because she has' so many defects.of you.. it 'would radiate with light and it she confronted the horizon with her dresses and' jewellery she would adorn it (the horizon). think of the' hungry and sacrifice your craving for 41 . She will never be disloyal and. When you place food in front .

good manners.. Re1110ve stones (impediments) and dirt (obstacles) from the 'road.y took .another. sake of Allah.And .. recitation of the Quranand 22· Kitabul Taibeen MinalMJibook Was Salateen: 14 . Spend the re-mainder of your life on bare. And all you servants around me" you are all free and you may have such and such properties.. in this 'world with the honour an abstemious ~person. He has been kind and offered elidvi VIce.lavish food (and feed the hungry).life after you. She also took off her 'attire and zeplaced it with some rough clothing and set off with bet master. The master then exclaimed: 'If that is the case. my master. remarked: '1 have no .' He then rippeda piece of rough curtain doth and replaced The maid his expensive clothes with thecurtaincloth. 'Has he spoken the truth. .. Thisyoung girl was renowned for her beauty.. 42 . . 'or is he merely telling a tale?' 'No he has spoken the truth. go tomorrow to the .' she replied. '.dwell in or Paradise for ever. Remove your worries of this world of oblivion .such and such property is yours'. Thishouse of mine and everything in it ts a charity in the path of Allah. then you ate free for the. Khalifah in Damascus lOS All). necessities. . Malik saw them off: he took one route and the. ' The master turned to themaid and asked: "0 maidi Have you listened to what our old man bas: said 1" 'Yes.station of dignity in peaceand." Sulaiman ibn Khalidsays that a young maid of an old lady was mentioned to Hisham ibn Abdul Malik (the.so that you may five.

Hisham gaveher own quarters and an escort of servants. girl) said: 'This mourner has broken my heart. Hisham sent orders by post to the governor of Kufa to have the girl bought for 'whatever her ownet '(the old Iady) asked 'for and then to have her immediately.in your resting place. she related some intriguing . you who dead. Behind. presented herwith someprecions jewels and extravagant clothing. When the governor received the letter.000 dirhams and a date orchard which would yield five hundred mithqal {a unit of 'weight) Of dates every year: The governor dressed the girl in royal clothing and sent her to Hisham. the procession was a group of mourning women. who ate carrying you to hurry up. left alone in your grave and you whoare about to be made a stranger . there were cries for help.him. Hisham looked over the balcony and saw a hearseaccompanied by people. sent to . He sent alongaservant for her. 0 YOu who are being transferred. If only ] knew whether you are telling those. Suddenly. you who are about to be. or whether you are asking them' where they are taking you and to take you back.' Gbadid (the.' Hisham said: ~ isa very serious matter and called the it 43 .' Hisharn started to weep" discarded his pleasure and started to say: 'Death is admonition enough.prolific poetry.stories to him and composed Some poems. One day while Hisham was with her oil a luxurious balcony which was enhanced with cushions and perfume. sent for 'the old lady 'who 'sold tbegirJ for 2. be. One mourner cried out aloud: '0 you who are being ate being taken to the carried on wooden sticks.

generous in giving me reward.that someone came to her and said: ''You_are flattered by your beauty and. She took a cane with a bag over it and stormed into Hishani's room.and wore a woollen jalabiyah and tied a string around her waist. Hisham did not recognise her.Ghadid remained stuck to her couch. You have had your pleasure with me. your girl.in fasting during the day like .' 'There is So much difference between those: who-seek pleasure. 1 have. world. ' Ghadid woke frightened and drank something to pacify herself. Don't cutoff my hope. come to ask you to free me from the slavery of this. my provision.servant. He came downfrom the balcony and Ieft. But where do you intend to go?' IDsham enquired. 'No-one will be in your way.a gazelle in its den. make good my return and be.you lure with yow charm. That night she dreamt. 'I am. '1 want to visit the House of Allah/ replied she. so go you are:free for the sake of Allah. of her servants-and "asked her to prepare a bath for ber. one. grant me my wish. How will you be when the trumpet is blown (on 'the Day of Judgement). ' She became very famous 44 . When night carne she would perform tawafof the Ka'bah andsay: '0 my treasure you are.' she said. After het bath. You arewith your pleasure. 'Go/ replied Hisham. 'A warner came to me and his warning shook me. she got rid of her jewels and clothes . Ghadid. She then called upon. 'when people are resurrected and then confronted with their actions. ' She left the capital and arrived in Makkah where she remained .

continue. May Allah have mercyupon her?3 Ibrahim ibn Bashshar. j)'OI have you been ordered to do this (hunting for pleasure). nor 'have you been ordered ·to do. lest He does not protectme. J vowed not to disobeymy Lord from this day. I looked around and found no one So I cursed the devil againand tried to. been creat-ed for this. "You have not. I heard a voice from beneath my saddle bow calling we by my _n~e and saying: ~'OIbrahim! You have not been created for this. serve Allah~Ibrahim said: 'My father was a king of Balkh {Central Khurasan). We used to. love 'hunting. the protege of Ibrahim ibn Adham • says that he asked Ibrahim about the beginning of his q-uest to.and died worshipping'. But then. my horse started to Shake again and Iheard the same Voice saying the same thing'. I heard a voice from behind me saying. I cursed the Deviland continued to ride. Suddenly . So I ~Ibid: 22 45 ." I'Iooked around me to the left and right but I did not see anybody.a rabbit or a fox jumped up and agitatedmy horse. t. Then. I went out one day on my horse accompanied by my dog. 'Then I returned to my family. But my horse would notstop trying to shake me off.this. stopped and realised that a warner fromthe Lord of the Worlds had come' to wake me up from my state of oblivion. Then.

He askedme to' bring them the biggest and best pomegranate. TIlls was the beginning of _my quest and day. r hid amongst the trees and scampered as soon as I had the chance to do so. Another learned person told me to go to Tarsoos where there was said to be plenty of work and good pureearnings. it very sour and.our fruits.' The servant.I went to see one of my father's shepherds and exchanged my clothes Ior his long shirt and a blanket.many days until one day . I asked a learnedpersonabout this and he told me to :go to SYria I did so and reached a town called Al-Mansoora (or Maseesah). Then I travelled across the mountains and valleys to Iraq. The servant came 46 . left and discussed me ill the masjid the next to the orchard with a large contingent of people. Hecut it and found. I remained as a rural warden . I went and brought him the 'biggest pomegranate. I went over·to him. complained: "Warden! You have been here been in om orchard for so: many days eating .a servant came along with many friends and shouted: ~~O warden!". 'The servant pointed towards his companions and said: "Did you hear what he said? He couldn'thave said anything more if be were Ibrahim. I worked there for a few days but I was not satisfied with the purity of my earnings. One person recognised who I was. Ibn Adham. but yet you don'tknow the difference betweena good pomegranate and a sour one?" I told him 1 had never tasted any of the fruits I guarded. But even here" I WaS'not satisfied with the purity of my earnings. I went there-and sat on the beach when a man came and hired me to be a warden for his orchards.

adhan forZuhr Was.this is how 1 left Tarsoos to travel the desert. He reminded Abdullah of . given. Abdullahwaited for Saturday to come and found the boy. The boy worked wellwith 'his hands 'and did not speak until the. After a few days" Abdullah needed some work done again.came back and worked until the. came back to work until Asr. Abdullah told him to leave. The boy went offered his prayers and. Abdullah asked him if be. The boy Went for Ast. end of the day. The boy agreed to work on the same conditions . The boy also stipulate-d' . . The boy said -yes and asked to be paid onedirham and one daniq (l/6th of a dirham).the condition.that he would discontinue work and prepare for prayers when the adhan of Zuhr likewise at the time of Asr. His wife told him to find the very same boy because he was goodand honest Abdullah went in search of the boy but could not find him. At the 24lbid~29 47 . would be willing to work. people told him that he only worked on Saturdays and that he was a loner.24 Abdullah ibn Faraj ~ says that he was in need of a handyman for his housewhom he could pay daily. On enquiring. The boy left whenAbdullah gave him wages. So he went to the bazaar and founda pale young bey wearing a woolen shirt tiedwith a woolen belt and had a big basket and a rope in his hands. was given and Abdullah agreed and took him to his house where be showed him 'what he had to-do..

end of the day's work" Abdullah offered the boy extra wages.and went to visit him. Wait until the ·day Harun-al-Rashid (the Khalifah at the time) comes to town . 'if you accept. Abdullah found out where he lived . · Abdullah agreed to do so. Abdullah answered both questions. Whet. 'Who was this -48 . 'sell my rope. .he was and where he got the . He' f01Jlld U1~ boy sleeping with his head resting on a.asked Abdullah. did . Abduilahwho . continued. Abdullah ran after him and begged him to take at least what he had asked for. Abdullah did as the. When Abdullah went~Harun excused everybody from his presence and asked. He did so and left.' replied the boy.l Harun-al-Rashid came to town. 'Do you need anything. ~. When the boy died. boy requested. Look inside the pocket of 'my shirt. The boy was very displeased and left.not find the boy there. 'Yes. he' went to see him.brick. Someone told him that the boy spent one daniq every day but had been taken ill. 'When I die. long story of the boy and wept so much that Abdullah started to feelsorry for hlm. 'There is a ring in it. wash my shirt and belt and then bury me in them. Baron heard the.'O leader of the believers!' Abdullah addressed the Khalifa. Some time later. He Was staying in the house of an old woman. informed him that he had a trust for him' and waved the ring. Abdullah needed to hire the boy again.ring from. He. Harun summoned Abdullah to his quarters. youandthen approach him and show him the ring.' the boy. He waited for Saturday to come and went to the bazaar. BUl do this after YOti have buried me.Stand m a place where he can see.' Abdullah sai~ he would.

Be. until dawn.grave.boy to. Baron asked Abdullah to. Abdullah did not know that theboy 'was the. took the ring very reluctantly. Harun wept for a long time and remained there.you?' 'He wasmy son!' the Khalifah 'exclaimed. He was very fond of his mother so I gave her this" expensive sapphire ring to give to 'him. He was brought up very well and was' well educated in the Quran and other sciences. "How-did he become like that?' 'He was born b~fore I became entrusted with the Khilafah. who has informed me of him. His mother since passed away and you are the only person. stay with him a few days 80 that he could visit the grave at nights. be left and did not care for anyofmyworldly belongings.2~ 251bid-: 37 49 .son of Harun until Harun himselftold hiIn_. When J assumed the Khilafah.' Abdullah took Harun tohis son's . You will take me to his grave tonight.

I would worry that Omar might be' held accountable for it. everybody will enter Paradise except one Omar.50 . 13 in a different .the Euphrates. 30 .an. used to say: •If only I were a tree cut downand eaten.T 26 This.28 Abdullali ibn Omar .Ibid . 1995 '17 .27 iijas..two black streaks on his face because of constant weeping " . .~~ . if only I were.. . person. narrates tbat Abu. Bakr . I would fear that that person would be me.Ihya version.$ says that Omar.. 29 JQ Ibid n Ibid 12 Takhweef: Ibid: 11275.{faft26 Abu Imraan Al~Jurti • reports that Abu Baler Siddiq • used to Bay: 'I wish I was a hair in the. .Sifarus .'Jiow The Companions Feared . used to say: 'If a goat had died with the driftage of . of Fearo!AUah Al-Firdous Ltd.9L. also used to . side of a believer.. . pick upa piece of grass and remark: 'If only I were this piece of grass.say: 'Ifsomeone announced from ·'ilie heavens that. naught and if only I could become completely forgotten. if only my mother had not Riven birth to me. it has also been quoted in Hilyaand..29 Abdullah ibn' Amirsays that he saw Omar ~. had . Abdullah ibn Isa • says that Omar ~. Chapter is taken from Chapter 3.Safwah: 11251 . if only I was not created.

~JTanbeehul 34.Quran should be concerned. you struggled along with the Prophet ~ 'when others deserted him...' 34 IbQ Abbas.He should not be uncouth. says: 'It is important for the one who memorises the Quran that . said to Omar ..~·wheri he was stabbed: ':0 Leader of the Believers! You accepted Islam others disbelieved. "A bearer of the.granted him Islam. his weeping when people laugh (in indifference). with you.a martyr. oblivious. But he has also informed lis that we willvapproach the fire without informing us' whether or not we 'will come: out from it (Referring to verse 71172 in Surah Maryam. ~ .Abdullah ibn Abbas.H·e 'said: Ibiti': 2/6 18 Ghaftleen:Zl41 8 51 . By Allah! If I had what ever the sun rose upon I would give it away in order to protect myself from what is about to rise: (upon me). his silence when they talk and his humbleness when they are proud. tolerant. was asked about those who' fear . tranquiland lenient . no two people have disagreed with you vand you are about to die as .he should recognise his nights when people are asleephis days whenpeople are not fasting. He said: 'That is true. birth to roe. . Prophet fa died while he was pleased..' Omar ~ replied: 'The flattered is: the one Wh91l1 you flatter.' Ris wife once asked him why he kept on saying thatespecially when Allah had favoured him and .33 It is narrated from Abu Maisarah-es that whenever he 'went to bed he would say: 'If only my mother bad not given.) Abdullah ibn Masoodes. his grief When people are content. a loud mouth nor a difficult person. the.

.S Ibid ~9 Ibid: . resurrectedatall "Ihere IS 'a person genealogy. ... tried' fuft6ntof his wife so ske cried too.. *' .d JIll :>I. e. LOtd1. - - 35 Ihya:4/181 11405 . ... - . 39 .aqf'ah).Suralt W. .pleased with fear.saicl: (himself)..says. ):8' our promised (tlrn(~).. He explained :that he... their' eyes weep'.idlfih .za: ..He . --- Once.(a: station mentioned in .)7 th~r AUa{:t forgives one of my sins and not mention my Abu W'a-il ~.~Why'are you crying?' . judgemen. Abdullah ibn Rawab~. J {anothe( .5 " Masrooq • says 'a rnan was with Abdullah ibn: Masood • '~lDd $aieh "I db norwish to be' among' the People of The Right Hand . Harith ibn $uvlaid.. but did not inion» him of coming -t "r t· au' ()."Their heartsare.3.. .. - - .asked her... in front of us. 1/11 s' . was crying hecau:se' Allah . ~Sjfaius. .'Abd. 'Because -you werecryhtg/she replied.hadInformed b. .'If yoularew what] Know about myself you would threw dirt over m~/~8 .says that Abdullah used to sayi'] would like." th e.' ~6 would pref~rto be among theOl1es given PFO!Xtmity here who would prefer that .:i:ri:t that he would. they say: 'How tan we be content when death is' behind us and tbe grave is.Safwah: 37 Ibid 3.' _. -. approach Hell..Station}. I-IeU is 'on our way and we have to 'face our '.henot be. 1/483a:n.

Thaur ibn Yazid ~ says' (hat when Muadh ibn Jabal .$ says whenever Ibn Ornar • recited the verse AUab. (SurahHadeed: 1'60):"Is it not time for the believers for their hearts to: SQ~t. re asleep. offer the tahajjud (pre-dawn) prayers. 0 AllahlGive me a guidanc e from Your Presence that You will return to me 0)1 the Day of Judgement.the: day when people will stand' upto face The Lord of allfhewerlds.6): '. Allah! . "Why are you crying-so much?' He was asked.eil' out of the remembranceief 40 4. .40. He replied:'! have remembered a verse of the Quran: ~ And' a barrier is made between them' and their desires (Surah Saba: 54).My search for Paradise is-slow and my flight from Hell is weak. stars areabout to disappear a while You are The Ever-Livingand Sustainer! 0.' (Surah A 'araaf: 50) Nafi' .42 . You Will notbreak Your promise.1 Ibid: 11492 Ibid Ibid 42 53 . he used to say: "0' Allah! EY€is.' he wailed so much that he could not recite any further :41 SamirAr-Rayahi ~ says that someone who heard Ibn says that his father informed him drank some Gold water and wept that Ibn Omar • intensely. .:"". overw h e1m hiun. 'And 1 realised that the people of Hell will only desire water: 'Pour on us some water or from that which Allah has given you.' he used to cry so much that his weeping would . Qasirn ibn Bazzahes Omar ~ recite Surah Mutaffifeen informed him that when Ibn Omar reached (verse .~ used to. .

45 Bakr ibn Muzm .' and then resort to 'prayers until Fajr.ten". 44 Asad alsomentioned that Shaddad. says that Abu Musa Ash'ari • gave a sermon in Basra and mentioned Hell..Allah ! If you knew what 1 knew you would not find joy with your wives and youwould not be able to relax on your beds.47 Ali ~ describes. He would say: '0 AllahlThe fire has prevented me from sleeping... By Allahl I wish that Allah would have. says that Shaddad ibn Auws . seeds in_ a frying pan.Abdur-Rahnian ibn. created me as a tree whose fruit is 'ea. used to toss and tum in his 'bed without .. used to be like. * 'Mujahid • says 'Ibn Zubair • used to 'be like a stick (in apprehension) while he was in salat. . the characteristics ·of-theCompanions: 'By AJ1ah I have seen the: Companions of the Prophetss used to wake up as if theyhad ridden goats all' night with their clothes and hair disheveled. . - Imraan ibn Husam • used to say: 'If only I were ashes that the wind would scatter. Ibid: 1/709 43 such that 1 have riot 'seen' anybody like them today.54 .. Ibid: 1/595' 44.. They They spent the night 4~_Ibid: 11765 Takhwee£: :3-2 47 Minahjus 'Salikeen: 326 46 .sleeping. He cried so much that his tears fell on the pulpit The audience also wept considerably that day 46 .43 Asad ibn Wada' ah . Abi Layla ~narrates from Abu Dbarr ~: 'By ..

.• reportsfrom. of this world which came to 48lhya: 41180 4~ Musannaf: 13/506 50 . .rnez" reciting the Book and alternating between their feet and foreheads. At. Ibn Masoodes stared }It them and enied 50 . they would not be imprudent This was during the day.Abu Hayyan Taymies that he had heard for thirty years or more that Ibn Masood ~ used to 'pass by those who blow into bellows (the blacksmiths) and would faint ..'48 completely oblIVIOUS and unaware. . Hasan Al-Basari • describes the Companions: 'I have witnessed and accompanied agroup of people who were never flattered them. they remembered Allah .. . rakhweef 55 . in the wind . night. Hasan Al-Basari • describes the: 'Companions as: "Tolerant to the point that if the ignorant carne upon them.they poured their tears across their cheeks and 'made their feet stand in the row of salat. the world was worth much less to them than the dirt which you tread. They would not have any clothes by artYthlng. In fact. Sa'd ibn Al-Ahzam $ says that he was with Ibn Masood • when be passed by the iron smiths who were taking out iron from :toe furnace.' 49 Iman Ahmed .and remained like a 'tree (whose branches) swaying .. nor were they sorry about anything that passed them. with their-eyes: pouring tearsso much that they wet their clothes.. . Now. ' - and sajdab for Allah. And when they awoke in the mom. 'it seems as if people are going to sleep .performing. hoping for their necks (selves) to be deli vered.

nor would they ask their wives to cook a meal for them. they have absorbed a great deal 01 grief in the world. -. people of the inner senses.have anything betweenthemselves . - . says that he 'was close to Juhan when he disappeared from him. But their grief is not what grieves: people. act upon the . passed by him.and the earth (at night}. says that Hasan • used tosay: 'The believersare a nation whose senses have become so humble that.the ignorant find them to be sick.' who has . this way . they remained - ~.night? [ don't know what is: meant from me.' 'If they performed . -we are for Allah. Don't you see that Allah says (Surah Fatir: 34): 'They will say: 'All praise Js due to Allah.' He kept on saying that until RiyahAl-Qaisi Muadh ibn Ann. grieved becauseof the fear 'Of ~lL ~. were clear heheard (Riyah) burst into tears and say: 'How long are you going to keep on coming for 'me 0 d_ay and. Furat ibn Sulaiman '.Allah. However. after Maghrib.51 them.. they have.. they would be happy. When night came upon them.and weep.relev. then they would stand ontheside of their bed mats. They are. By Allah.ed us of out gtief. would ask Allah to: pardon sewn for them throughouttheir IIves. it would grieve them and they .. If they made a mistake.a good deed.'By Allah. We are for .52 Omar ~ heard a person in Tahajjud recite the verse (in Thya: 4/396 and Musannaf in brief: .by Allah. I found them to.also not way of thelr Prophet.Book of their Lord and the Then" they would ask their Lord to deliver them. Theywould. 'When the roads'. offer gratitude for it and ask Allah to accept it from them.l3/506 51 52 raldlweef:20 56 .

' Omar said: •Allah has made a true promise. Hasan .56 Shaqiq' ibn Ibrahim. .A'man is fora person tbangrief .and fear: grief over the sins which passed and fear for the future what it might bring. for . Amir ibn Qais .Surah Toot: 7/8):: 'ID.' and returned home and became ill.. isconcerned will be theones who ·are the.54 with whom he loves' deceive you.~ month" P~fle visited him but did not know what his sickness was. Someone said: 'Grief prevents food and fear stops sins. The Jews and Christiansclaim they love their prophets. with the pious except with their deeds.1lSed to say: 'Do not . but they will not be with them. The people who will laugh the. The most sincere peopleas far as Iman. most contemplative in this world. 'There is no better companion "5:) Ibjd:29 54 55 Tanbeehu1 Ghafileen mid ~6Ibld 57 . says.deed the punishment of your Lord Is inevitablee therewlll be none to avert It. For you will never be.most will be the ones who have cried the most in this world '(out of fear). says: 'The people who will be the happiest in the Hereafter Will be the ones who are the: most concerned in this world (for the Hereafter). iSS" let thestatement: .

combine impertunity praised Zakariyab.Mix asking (for belpj.-. you have to meet .. 1.. he called Omar ~ and advised .995.~ptet3 oLTalWa-: The Provision of A. M~¢· ~qwa your goa11arui the polish of your heart. 'wrote to a mant "] advise you to '57 This Chaprer i$ :ta1c. protected himself from Illi punishment. Believers.and whoever thanks.and Whoever offers Him a.." $8 M.may Allah be ~teased with "them . s 58 .S8· . 9"0 . invoke.. Who 'shows mercy only to' its adherents and Who rewards only on :its account. There are 'tnany who preach Omar ibn AbiJUl. Him. Omar ·~WrottS to hisson: ·'I. Ali 0 deputised someone for all expedition and said: "1 advise you to fear Allah Whom.of·tfte 'PredecessO'TSo t 'Iaauia57 -1_/". ..ne anothertowards taqwa. Ltd. Hecontrols the observe fear of Allah Who accepts nothing except that (taqwe).always exbot1ed0. Abu Bakr • used to say' in his kbutba:'I adviseyou to observe taqwa :and· to' praise Allah . for whoever feats Him has. He 'will give him more.~. N-Firdous. 'Us and his'. 1:..en:ftoll1 Ch. with with' hope and fear and they were devout to Us.' 'DQ destination. lie will repay besides 'Wbom you hav'e world andthe Hereafter.'E~fiortation. Bake" was about to die.. AI' "ULal1 .advis¢ you 10 featAll~. (rewardjhim . loan. When Abu.l..him first andforemost to fearAllah.Ji'tV' '. MydearMusbm br6th~r1 You should be informed that the predecessors .-rnl'Vfyaa:·." .as He deserves to De praised.~ frumly!:"Th~yUsed ro race towards goodness.Aziz .Allahhas hope witb rear and.

it. May Allah help us both to observe jt and give us both its reward. will erase it and approach people with good manners.' Arnan was about to leave for Hajj and' asked. ' Another person wrote to his brother: 'I world and the Hereafter.Omar • . he would ask Hakam if he (Hakam) required anything. When Omar • became khalifah he gave a sermon and said. of the. follow up a mistake with kindness for lit.Mate it a means towards every good deed and a deterrent against every evil.to advise him. ~Fear Allah} for whoever fears Him win never feel lonely.' . he passed by a graveyard outside Kufa and said: ':0 you who live in houses that create loneliness and in deserted places t Y ou who Iiv. Allah has guaranteed those with taqwa deliverance from their myse1f to-observe taqwa for It is the best provision for the advise you and anxieties and provisions from unexpected quarters. He would say: '1 advise you with the words. He 'said'. Prophet when he advised Muadh: 'Fear Allah wherever you are. 59 Ali • returned from the Battle of Siffin.59 .' Shu'ba says that whenever he used to prepare for a joumey. ' A predecessor w-rote to one. but few who practice "it. .e in darkening graves! 0 people of 'dust and 59 The When preceding quotations are from Jami¢. May Allah make us all among those who have taqwa. Hikam: 194 . 'Ladvise you to fear Allah and be good because He is with those who fear and do good. of his brother: 'I advise you to fear Allah because it is the bestthingyou can hide" the most beautiful thing YOQ can reveal and the most valuable thing you gui treasure.

The wealth? It has. This is' the news we have for you. turned towards his.alienation! 0 people of isolation and loneliness! You are. inhabited again.id:'Ifthey were p~~tte~ to speak . The wives? They have remarried.they would. The houses? 'WeU~ they havebecome. for you. . been distributed. What. news do you have for us? Then Ali . followers. inform you that the 60 best provIsIon 1Staqwa.armyand sa. for usvscouts and we.:" 60 Nahjul Balagha: 126 60..

N:QQj~Qt. those whol ask and for those in captivity (like. tbe . slavesj. VirtN~ Is (thevirtue Qf)' those: who believe In ARab. :give' wealth to relatives.. tbe angels.:FirdousOLtd.62 Hamman ibn Shuraih .~the cl~tiQn)tbeir means of sustenance and placed them on earth.many times throughcut the Quran.Allah bas meutioned tb¢ qO. AH • said: '\VhenAilah created I1is creation" Redid so while He was completely independent :0$ benefit Then He distributed amongst them . A 62 61 . .those· who {ulfil tbeirp'romlse: ~ter making oneandthose whoarestead.y ate theones who ate truthful and those are the ones who: have taqwa."-sked him a 'to narrate the qualities oftlre people of GlqW3. l-. the wayfarer.rHe bas described how they ate 'pleasant. onphans.fgr :tbe love of Allah... The peopleoftaqwa hurt 161 and of their disobedience towards Him. that you turn towards the East or the West.aliti¢SQt those with taqwa (muttaqoon) . civil and they ate of sound judgement.L:~t Day. so that he woUld be able to seethem in front of hint. :thosewhe establish praye17s. 1995.3J1dofferzakat. ihQsewho.f8st in trial. This.a companion of Ali ~ . The.edience of their o-bedience towards Him tan Him and no obedience rom. the Revelation :and the prophets'. ad~rsity :and the time gf war. tbenee:dy.l3li~:v~t8". Chapter is taken from Chapter' 4 ~fTQqwa: The Provision of SorahBaqarah: 177 B. Due of the most comprehensive verses in this regard is the: verse 0l virtue (birr}: 'Virtue ls not.

they reach for it and belicve Jt is theirdestination. Duringthe nights they stand the Qunw. The world tempts them. . so everything else becomes immaterial to . .e.. when they see something that Allah has forbidden them to. . It imprisons them.are of moderate natureand their walk. their souls would not. They observe patience for a few days and experience everlasting comfort.. they engage in prayers so much that it is' as: if they sleep in those ~3 postures 62 .souls are chaste.. 63 . 1. see andthey give an ear to beneficial knowledge. They maintain their -dntegrity in both adversity and prosperity. Their bodies ate lean. . their garments . their needs are few and their . but they do not succumb. remain an extra second in their bodies out of yearning for reward and fear Of punishment. Ifan 'intimidating verse comes along. "They sleep on .i~ non-contagious. they pour their hearts towards it and believe: that: Helland its screams are in their ears. bur they ransomed themselves in exchange.Theyrecitewith grieves their hearts anddrink in. r-ows and read portions of proper recitation which I it (the Quran) like medicine. They are with Paradise as if they had already witnessed it and enjoyed its presence. This is a profitable exchange that their Lord has made pleasant for them. The Creator tanks .8 one of humility.Supreme in their eyes.: theirspeech is correct (true). They lower their gazes. i. Had it not been for the appointed time that Allah has written for them (death).on earth are those (!)f virtue. . Their hearts grieve and their evil (if any} . .them.•. If a verseof yearning comes along. their foreheads and elbows and Implore· Allah to deliver them... They are with 1-1e11as if they have already seen it and tasted its torment.• .

{d1ttin. away at their bodies as if they were.ar . Fear has chipped. hUilg. ' 'If their carnal selves make . their desires killed and their anger subdued. They crave for Their signsare that they are kn0wl~dgeand ·atekn6wledgeable with tolerance: moderate in ticbaess.Inthe day. They sleep in alatm~nd they' awake in joy. Anyone looking .de.nor do they ask for a great 'deal They condemn themselves and are.theit they are confused. Some willsay that deeds.olln. not know about. The apple of their eyes is in what does not perish and lheirabs~temiQtls..meager their matterssimple.t:hewwowdthink that theywere sick.sick. apprehensiveab()ut. If one of them is caned "pious". active in (pursuingjguidanceand theyabhorgreed. only. their hearts humble 'their sel ves content. But theyare not . My Lord .itdlfficult for them to' fulfil that wlllt:b they dislike.cd. they deprive them (their . 'I know myself better than you do. resohite in their s. seeking halal. arrows.er-.(less is in what disappears. their diet .fuey are tolerant and learned" kind and God'fearing.selves)ofdtar which theyIike. firm in their belief. You will find their hopes are realistic: their mistakes few.1)eensaie"g'uru. their .gxeat feat has made them look like strong in Islam.d the monllrtg in remembrance.ess.knows me better than LduO Allah! Do not take me to task for what theyare saying about me and (0 Lordrmake me better than they think Potgivemysms which they do.They spend the evening in gratitUd~art.nevereontem to do.a Jew actions.' that.g tbeday). 'They perform good'deeds in fear (of rejeotibJj). They are . A. pleasant in. Goodness 'isexpected from 63 . forbearing in distress. They ccmbmeknowledgewith toleranceand speech with attio~. what will 'be said of him and says. he fears.

Theyare never profane and always Ienient..J .them and evil is shielded against them. are closeto them is ameans of mercy (for those woo.do not callanyone names nor do they hurt their neighbours. If they aretreated with injustice.acknowredge the truth before it 'app~' and do not lQseaaytbing they are entrustedwith. Their own selves live 'in toil while otbersarecomfortaJble Their abstinence fromthosewhe . deeds are always preserr. 'They. If they ate among tbQ~e who te1):).ember"Uley atel10t writtenamong the oblivious. If they areamong those-who are oblrvieus. they remainpatient until Allah vindicates them. They do not curse at the time of difficulties nor do they ventureinto falsehood .tbemand if they laugh tb¢y do not around them.aad arto&~nceandtbeir being close is neither a ploy nor a scheme . They are not prejudiced 'against those theydislike nor do they favour those they Iove. 'Theirproximity to 'those who.stay away from them is' their exoneration (from malice). They pardon those who wrong them.quakes.: 64 N. dl~Yprovide for those who deprive them and. raise their voices. Balaeha: 241 .g..ahiul. Their remainingaloof is nor out of pride . . Silence does not bother . They . 64 . with them.meet those who severe ties. they are countedamongst those who remember (Allah). are close to them). Th~y ~e resolute when the earth. Their 'wrong doings' arealmost non-existent their" gpnd. 'and steadfast In calamities and grateful in prosperity.q .

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