Returning Home

Nhat Hanh Zen Master

Returning Home

Thich Nhat Hanh offers a guided meditation to relax our body and mind and return to the here and now. Fully present, fully alive, we find we are already home.

Do you remember anything from your stay in your mother's womb? All of us spent about nine months there. That's quite a long time. I believe that all of us had a chance to smile during that time. But who were we smiling at? When we're happy, there's a natural tendency to smile. I have seen people, especially children, smiling during their sleep. Our time in our mothers wombs was a wonderful time. We did not have to worry about food or drink. We were protected from heat and cold. We didn't have to do homework or housework. Protected in our mothers' wombs, we felt quite safe. We didn't have to worry about anything at all. No worry is wonderful. I believe many of us still remember that time spent in our mothers wombs. Many people have the impression that they were once in a safe and wonderful paradise and now they have lost that paradise. We think somewhere out there is a beautiful place without worry or fear, and we long to get back there. In the Vietnamese language the word for uterus is the palace of the child. Paradise was inside of our mothers. In the womb, your mother took care of you. She ate and drank for you. She breathed air for you, in and out. And I guess that she dreamed for you as well. I imagine you dreamed your mothers dreams. And if your mother smiled, I think you smiled too. If your mother dreamed about something difficult, and she cried in her dream, I guess that you probably cried with her. You shared her dreams and her nightmares, because you and your mother werent two separate people. You were physically attached to your mother through the umbilical cord. And your mother channeled to you through that umbilical cord food and drink, oxygen, everything, including her love. You mother probably took care of her body differently when you were in it. She may have been more careful while walking. She may have stopped drinking or quit smoking. These are very concrete expressions of love and care. You were there, you had not been born, and yet you were the object of love. Your mother nourished you before you were born, but if you look deeply you will see that you also nourished your parents. Because of your presence in her body, they may have smiled more and loved life even more. You hadn't done anything to your parents yet, and yet they were nourished by your presence. And their life changed from the moment of your conception in your mother's womb. Perhaps your mother talked to you before you were born. And I believe, I am convinced, that you heard her talking with you and you responded. Perhaps it happened that occasionally she forgot you were there. So perhaps you gave her a kick to remind her. Your kick was a bell of

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mindfulness, and when she felt that she may have said, Darling, I know you are there and I am very happy. This is the first mantra. When you were first born, someone cut your umbilical cord. And quite likely you cried aloud for the first time. Now you had to breathe for yourself. Now, you had to get used to all the light surrounding you. Now, you had to experience hunger for the first time. You were outside of your mother, but still somehow inside her. She embraced you with her love. And you embraced her at the same time. You were still dependent on her. You may have nursed at her breast. She took care of you day and night. And although the cord was no longer whole between you, you were linked to your mother in a very concrete, intimate way. As an adult, you may fight very hard to convince yourself that you and your mother are two different people. But it's not really so. You are a continuation of both your parents. When I meditate, I can still see the cord connecting me to my mother. When I look deeply, I see there are umbilical cords linking me to phenomena as well. The sun rises every morning. And thanks to the sun, we have heat and light. Without these things, we can't survive. So an umbilical cord links you to the sun. Another umbilical cord links you to the clouds in the sky. If the clouds were not there, there would be no rain and no water to drink. Without clouds, there is no milk, no tea, no coffee, no ice cream, nothing. There is an umbilical cord linking you to the river; there is one linking you to the forest. If you continue meditating like this, you can see that you are linked to everything and everyone in the cosmos. Your life depends on everything else that existson other living beings, but also on plants, minerals, air, water, and earth. Suppose you plant a kernel of corn and seven days later it sprouts and begins to take the form of a corn stalk. When the stalk grows high, you may not recognize it as the kernel you planted. But it wouldn't be true to say the kernel had died. With Buddha's eyes, you can still see the corn seed in the corn stalk. The stalk is the continuation of the kernel in the direction of the future, and the kernel is the continuation of the stalk in the direction of the past. They are not the same thing, but they are not completely separate, either. You and your mother are not exactly the same person, but you aren't two different people either. This is the truth of interdependence. No one can be ones self alone. We have to inter-be to be. When we are inside our mothers, there is no tension in our bodies. We are soft and flexible. But once we are out in the world, tension creeps in, sometimes from our first breath. Before we can release the tension in our bodies, though, we have to release the tension in our breath. If our bodies are not peaceful, then our breath is not peaceful. When we generate the energy of mindfulness and embrace our breath, the quality of our in-breath and outbreath will improve. As we breathe in mindfulness, our breathing becomes calmer and more profound. The tension in our breathing dissipates. And when

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Nhat Hanh Zen Master

our breathing is relaxed, we can embrace our bodies and we can relax. The exact word that the Buddha used translates as calm. There is a Pali text called the Kayagatasati Sutta, the Sutra on the Contemplation of the Body in the Body. In it, the Buddha proposed an exercise for releasing the tension in each particular part of the body, and in the body as a whole. He used the image of a farmer who went up to the attic and brought down a bag of beans. The farmer opened one end of the bag and he allowed all the beans to flow out. With his good eyesight, he was able to distinguish the particular kind of beans and see which were kidney beans, which were mung beans, and so forth. The Buddha recommended that, like this farmer, we learn to pay attention. To begin, you can lie in a comfortable position and scan your whole body, and then focus on different parts of the body. Begin with the head, or the hair on the head, and finish with the toes. You can say: Breathing in, I am aware of my brain. Breathing out, I smile to my brain. Continue with the rest of your body. Like the farmer with his seeds, scan the bodynot with x-rays but with the ray of mindfulness. Even fifteen minutes is enough time to scan your body slowly with the energy of mindfulness. When the fully conscious mind recognizes a part of the body and embraces it with the energy of mindfulness, that part of the body is finally allowed to relax and release its tension. This is why smiling is such a good way to help your body relax. Your first smiles in the womb were completely relaxed smiles. There are hundreds of muscles in your face, and when you get angry or fearful they get very tense. But if you know to breathe in and to be aware of them and to breathe out and smile to them, you can help these muscles release the tension. With one in-breath and out-breath, your face can transform. One smile can bring a miracle. If, during your scan, you come to a part of your body that is sore or ill, stay focused on that part longer. We tend to hurry past pain. But this hurrying causes more tension instead of healing. If we spend more time with what hurts, using the energy of mindfulness, we can smile at our pain and release some of the tension. If we know how to help release the tension in that part of the body, the healing will take place much more quickly. You may be in real physical pain. Mindfulness will tell you that it is only a physical pain. The Buddha spoke about the second arrow. He tells the story of a person struck by an arrow who is in a lot of pain. Suppose a second arrow hit the man in exactly at the same spot. The pain would be a hundred times more intense because he was already wounded. Worry, fear, exaggeration, and anger about an injury act as a second arrow, aggravating a part of the body that is already wounded. So if you are struck by one arrow, you can practice mindfulness so that another arrow of fear or worry doesn't hit you in that same spot. In the Sutra on the Contemplation of the Body in the Body, the Buddha advises us to become aware of the four natural elements within the body. In the womb, these elements of water, fire, air, and earth are completely

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Nhat Hanh Zen Master

balanced. The mother balances the womb for the baby, sending in oxygen and nutrients as the baby rests in water. Once we are born, if we have a balance within the four elements, then we are in good health. But often these elements are out of balance; we can not get warm or we find it difficult to take a full breath. Often, our mindful breath can naturally bring these elements into balance. The Buddha also recommended that we become aware of our bodys positions and actions. In sitting meditation, the first thing is to be aware that you are in a sitting position. Then you can sit in a way that brings you calm, solidity, and well-being. In each moment we can notice the position of our body, whether we are sitting, walking, standing, or lying down. We can be aware of our actions, whether we are getting up, bending down, or putting on a jacket. Awareness brings us back to ourselves, and when we are fully mindful of our body, and living in the here and now, we are in our true home. Did you know you had a true home? This question touches everybody. Even if you have the feeling that you don't belong to any land, to any country, to any geographical spot, to any cultural heritage, or to any particular ethnic group, you have a true home. When you were in your mothers body, you felt at home. Perhaps you long for a return to that place of peace and safety. But now, inside of your own body, you can come home. Your true home is in the here and the now. It is not limited by time, space, nationality, or race. Your true home is not an abstract idea. It is something you can touch and live in every moment. With mindfulness and concentration, the energies of the Buddha, you can find your true home in the full relaxation of your mind and body in the present moment. No one can take it away from you. Other people can occupy your country, they can even put you in prison, but they cannot take away your true home and your freedom. When we stop speaking and thinking and enjoy deeply our in- and outbreath, we are enjoying being in our true home and we can touch deeply the wonders of life. This is the path shown to us by the Buddha. When you breathe in, you bring all yourself together, body and mind; you become one. And equipped with that energy of mindfulness and concentration, you may take a step. You have the insight that this is your true homeyou are alive, you are fully present, you are touching life as a reality. Your true home is a solid reality that you can touch with your feet, with your hands, and with your mind. It is fundamental that you touch your true home and realize your true home in the here and the now. All of us have the seed of mindfulness and concentration in us. By taking a mindful breath or making a mindful step, you can bring your mind back to your body. In your daily life, your body and mind often go in two different directions. You are in a state of distraction; mind in one place, body in another. Your body is putting on a coat but your mind is preoccupied, caught in the past or the future. But between your mind and your body there is something: your breath. And as soon as you go home to your breath and you breathe with awareness, your body and mind come together, very quickly. While breathing in, you don't think of anything; you just focus

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Nhat Hanh Zen Master

your attention on your in-breath. You focus, you invest one hundred percent of yourself in your in-breath. You become your in-breath. There is a concentration on your in-breath that will make body and mind come together in just one moment. And suddenly you find yourself fully present, fully alive. There is no more longing to return to the womb, to your perfect paradise. You are already there, already home. Returning Home, Thich Nhat Hanh, Shambhala Sun, March 2006.

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Nhat Hanh Zen Master

TR V

BN C NH g khng v ci thu cn nm trong bng m? Chn thng , c mt thi gian di. Ti thit ngh nm trong bng m, tt c chng ta ai cng c dp mm ci. Th nhng chng ta ci g vy? Khi hnh phc chng ta thng ci. Ti thy nhiu ngi, nht l tr em, mm ci lc ng. Thi gian trong bng m qu tht tuyt vi. Mnh chng phi lo lng n chuyn n ung. Tng cn nng lnh c che ch. Chuyn hc hnh, lm lng cng khng ng ti. Trong bng m tht an ton bit my. Khng phi lo lng iu g. M khng lo l iu tuyt nht. Ti ngh nhiu ngi vn cn tic nui thi gian nm trong bng m. Nhiu ngi c cm gic rng c mt ln c sng trong mt thin ng yn n, diu k, v gi y nh mt thin ng ny. H ngh chc c mt ni p , an lnh nh th u bn ngoi, ni y chng cn chi lo s, v mong c c tr li chn . Trong ting Vit, d con cn c gi l t cung c ngha l cung in ca a con. Thin ng ngy xa l trong bng m. Nm trong bng, mnh c m lo cho ht. M n, m ung cho mnh. M th cho mnh tng hi th vo ra. Ti ngh c l m nm m c cho mnh na. Ti mng tng chc mnh cng m nhng g m ang m. Nu m ci chc mnh cng ci. V nu trong gic m gp khn n m khc, mnh hn cng khc theo m. Mnh ci khc theo tng gic m lnh, tng cn c mng ca m, bi v m v mnh u phi l hai. Mnh dnh cht vi m qua cung nhau, hay si dy rn. Qua dy rn ny m cho mnh thc n, nc ung, tt c mi th, k c lng yu thng ca m. C l khi c thai mnh, m chm sc thn th m k cng hn. M i ng nh nhng. C l m b ung ru v ht thuc. Mt cch th hin tnh yu thng ca m thit thc nht. Mnh ch mi trong bng m cha c cho i m c dnh cho bit bao l tru mn. M nui dng mnh c trc khi mnh ra i, nhng nhn tht su th thy lc mnh cng ang nui dng m mnh. Nh c mnh trong bng m m ti ci, yu i thm. Ba cng th. Mnh cha lm c g, th m ring s c mt ca mnh cng nui dng ba m ri. Cuc i ca ba m dng nh i khc t ngy m c thai mnh. C l m cng ni chuyn vi mnh c khi mnh cha cho i. V ti tin chc rng lc mnh nghe c m v p ng li m. C nhng lc m l l dng nh qun i s c mt ca mnh trong bng. Lc mnh p mt ci nhc m. Ci p l ting chung chnh nim gip m nh ra v m d dnh mnh: Cng , m bit con m ang c mt trong , v m hnh phc bit bao, con yu i. l cu thn ch yu thng th nht. Ri n ngy cho i, ai ct cung nhau cho mnh. V c l l lc mnh ct ting khc u tin trong i. By gi mnh phi t th mt mnh. By gi mnh phi tp lm quen vi mi th nh sng chung quanh. By gi ln u mnh mi bit th no l i. Ra ngoi ri m mnh vn cn nh trong bng m. M m hn mnh vi ht c tnh thng. V mnh cng bu cht m. Mnh cng

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cha sng thiu m c. Ri m cho mnh b. M chm sc ngy m. D cung nhau gia m con khng cn, mnh vn cn c ni vi m bng mt si dy mu m thm tnh. Khi trng thnh, mnh phi phn u gay go vi chnh mnh t thuyt phc rng mnh v m l hai c th bit lp. Nhng s tht khng phi vy. Mnh l s tip ni ca cha m mnh. Khi thin qun, ti thy cung nhau vn cn ni ti vi m. Khi qun chiu su, ti thy c nhng si dy rn vn ni ti vi vn hu trong i. Mi sng mai, mt tri mc cho ta nh sng v hi m. Thiu nhng th , ta khng th tn ti. Nh th l c cung nhau ni mnh vi mt tri. Mt cung nhau khc ni mnh vi nhng m my trn tri. Nu khng c my, mnh s khng c ma v nc ung. Khng c ma, mnh s khng c sa, tr, c-ph, khng c c-rem, khng c g ht. C mt si dy rn ni lin mnh vi dng sng, mt si dy khc ni mnh vi rng cy. Nu tip tc qun chiu nh vy, mnh s thy mnh dnh lin vi mi s v mi ngi trong v tr ny. S sng ca mnh ty thuc vo s sng ca tt c mi hin hu khc - khng phi ch ty vo mi sinh vt m vo tt c cy c, t , khng kh, nc v t. Gi th mnh gieo mt ht bp v chng mt tun sau ht bp ny mm v nh ln t non. Khi cy bp vn cao, mnh khng cn nhn ra c l ht bp mnh gieo ngy no. Nhng nu ni rng ht bp cht th khng ng. Bng i mt ca Bt, mnh s thy rng ht bp vn cn sng ni thn cy bp. Thn bp l s tip ni ca ht bp v hng tng lai, v ht bp l s tip ni ca thn bp v hng qu kh. Hai th y khng phi l mt, nhng cng khng phi hon ton khc bit nhau. Mnh v m mnh khng phi l mt ngi, nhng khng phi l hai ngi hon ton khc bit. l mt chn l v tnh tng thuc, mi vt nng vo nhau m sng. Khng ai c th tn ti bit lp. L mnh, chng ta ng thi l tt c nhng th khc. c mt, hin hu, chng ta phi cng nhau c mt, cng nhau hin hu. o Bt gi l tng tc. Trong bng m, thn ta khng phi chu nhiu cng thng, nn vn cn mm mi, do dai. Nhng khi va mi cho i, s cng thng p n, c khi t hi th u tin. bung th nhng cng thng ni thn, ta phi bung th nhng cng thng ni hi th. Nu thn ta khng bnh an th hi th ta cng khng c bnh an. Khi chng ta pht khi c nng lng ca chnh nim v m p c hi th th phm cht ca hi th vo ra ca ta s c ci thin. Th chnh nim th hi th tr nn m du v su lng hn. S cng thng ni hi th tan bin mt. Khi hi th nh nhng, mnh c th chm sc v lm lng du hnh hi. Bt gi l lm cho thn ta an tnh. C mt kinh Pali tn l Kayagatasati Sutta, tc "Kinh Nim Thn. Trong kinh ny, Bt dy ta php thc tp bung th tng b phn ca c th cng nh ca ton thn. Bt dng hnh nh ca mt bc nng dn leo ln kho v em xung mt bao ng cc loi ht. Bc nng dn m u bao v cc loi ht tun ra. Vi i mt cn rt tinh tng, bc c kh nng phn bit c cc loi ht v thy c y l y xanh, y l u ng, v.v... Bt khuyn ta hy hc cch ch tm nh bc nng dn n.

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Trc ht, bn hy nm trong t th thoi mi, ch n ton thn, sau tun t xem xt tng b phn mt ca c th. Bt u t u hay tc trn u ln lt xung n cc ngn chn. Bn c th ni: Th vo, ti ang thc v b c ca ti. Th ra, ti mm ci vi b c ca ti. Tip tc nh th cho n khi nhn din c ht cc b phn trong c th. Nh ngi nng dn ang xem xt cc ht u, bn hy chiu soi tng c phn c th mnh, khng phi bng quang tuyn X, m bng nh sng ca chnh nim. Ch cn mi lm pht, t t bn c th soi chiu ton thn vi nng lng ca chnh nim. Khi mt b phn trong c th c nhn din v m p bi nng lng chnh nim, tnh gic, b phn y dn dn th gin ra, v s cng thng c lng du. Th nn mm ci l cch tt nht gip cho thn th gin. N ci thu ban s trong bng m hn l nhng n ci ht sc thoi mi. Trn mt ta c hng trm bp tht, mi ln gin hay s, nhng bp tht ny b cng thng rt nhiu. Nhng nu ta bit th; th vo nhn din cc bp tht trn mt, th ra mm ci vi chng, ta c th gip chng th gin rt nhiu. Vi mt hi th vo, v mt hi th ra, khun mt ta c th c bin i. Mi n ci c th em n mt php l. Nu trong lc ang soi chiu, c mt b phn no ca c th b bnh hay au nhc, ta hy tp trung tm lu hn . Ta c khuynh hng vi vng i pht qua nhng ch au. Nhng vi vng nh th ch lm gia tng cng thng ch khng gip lm cho nhng ni y c m du v cha tr. Nu ta bit dnh th gi cho nhng ch au, m p nhng ni y vi nng lng chnh nim, mm ci vi ch au, th s cng thng s gim c nhiu. Lm c nh th, ch au s rt chng lnh. C th thn mnh ang au nhc lm. Chnh nim gip mnh nhn din c y ch l ci au nhc ca thn. Bt c dy v mi tn th hai qua cu chuyn mt ngi b tn bn rt au. Gi s c mt mi tn th hai li bn ng vo ngay ch . S au n hn phi tng ln gp c trm ln, v ngi ny b thng sn. b thng ri m cn lo lng, s hi, cng iu ha, tc gin v hnh ng gy ra thng tch, th c khc no rc thm mt mi tn th hai khin cho vt thng cng thm trm trng. Vy nu bn b trng tn ri, hy thc tp chnh nim cho mi tn ca lo lng, s hi... khng n cm trng vo ni thng tch. Trong Kinh Nim Thn, Bt khuyn ta hy thc r v s c mt ca t i ni thn ta. Trong bng m, bn yu t t, nc, gi, la ny hon ton qun bnh. B m iu ha cho ci thai, cung cp dng kh, thc n trong khi a con nm ngh ngi trong dung dch nc. Khi c sinh ra, nu c s iu ha trong bn i th sc khe ca mnh rt tt. Nhng thng th cc yu t khng c qun bnh; chng ta lnh khng sao m ni, hoc khng th c cho trn. Bng hi th chnh nim, ta c th ti lp li qun bnh mt cch t nhin gia cc yu t ny mt cch t nhin. Bt cng c dy ta hy thc r v t th v hot ng ca thn. Trong khi ngi thin, ci u tin phi thc r l mnh ang trong t th ngi thin. Ri sau ta c th ngi cch no cho c an tnh, vng chi v khe khon. Trong mi pht giy, ta c th nhn din c t th ca thn, d ang ngi, i, ng hay nm. Ta c th thc r v cc hot ng ca ta, nh ang

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ng ln, ci xung hay ang mc o. thc tnh gic mang ta tr v vi chnh mnh. Khi chng ta hon ton c chnh nim v thn, v sng trn vn by gi v y th chng ta ang trong qu hng ch thc ca mnh. BN C BIT bn c mt qu hng ch thc? Cu hi ny t ra cho tt c mi ngi. Ngay c khi bn c cm gic mnh khng thuc vo mt t nc, mt dn tc no, khng thuc mt di sn vn ha no, mt chng tc no, bn vn c mt qu hng ch thc quay v. Khi bn trong bng m, mnh cm thy yn n. C lc mnh m c tr v chn y c an lnh, bo bc. Nhng gi y, chnh trong thn th ny, mnh c th quay v. Qu hng ch thc ca mnh l ni ny v y. N khng b gii hn bi thi gian, khng gian, quc tch hay chng tc. Qu hng ch thc ca mnh khng phi l mt nim tru tng. l mt ci g bn c th tip xc v sng vi n tng giy tng pht. Vi nim v nh, cc ngun nng lng ca Bt, bn c th nhn ra qu hng ch thc trong s an tr thn tm trong pht giy hin ti. Khng ai c th ly i qu hng ch thc ca mnh. Ngi ta c th xm lng chim c t nc ca mnh, thm ch nht mnh trong t ngc, nhng ngi ta khng th no ly i qu hng ch thc v s t do ca mnh. Khi chng ta ngng li s ni nng v suy ngh chuyn ch vo hi th vo-ra, chng ta ang an tr trong qu hng ch thc ca mnh, v c th tip xc c vi nhng mu nhim ca s sng. y l con ng Bt ch by cho chng ta. Khi th vo, ta gom ht thn tm v mt mi; ta tr thnh mt. c trang b vi nng lng ca nim v nh ri, ta c th ct bc i. Ta c c tu gic y l qu hng ch thc ca mnh - ta thc s c mt trong s sng, ta thc s tip xc vi s sng nh mt thc ti. Qu hng ch thc ny l mt thc ti chc nch, mnh c th s m c bng chn, bng tay v c bng tm . Mnh cn phi tip xc cho c qu hng ch thc ca mnh v nhn ra qu hng ch thc ca mnh trong ci by gi v y; l iu thit yu c bn. Tt c chng ta u c ht ging ca nim v nh. Bng hi th thc v bng bc chn chnh nim, mnh c th a tm tr v vi thn. Trong i sng hng ngy, tm v thn thng i theo hai hng khc bit. Mnh nm trong trng thi xao lng, mt ng thn mt no. Thn ang mc o th tm bn rn chuyn qu kh, chuyn tng lai. Th nhng gia tm v thn c mt gch ni: l hi th. Mnh ch cn quay v vi hi th, th cho tht chnh nim th chng my chc thn v tm c th hp nht. Khi th vo, mnh khng ngh g ht; mnh ch ch tm vo hi th vo. Tp trung tm , u t mt trm phn trm thn tm vo hi th vo. Hi th vi mnh l mt. S tp trung trn hi th vo ny l mt nh lc s a thn tm v li vi nhau trong khonh khc. V bng nhin ta thy mnh ang c mt trn y, sinh ng. Khng cn ni kht khao c quay v nm trong bng m, quay v thin ng tuyt ho. Ta v ri trn qu hng ch thc ca mnh. (Bi tp Thin bung th, do Thin s Thch Nht Hnh hng dn gip lm th gin thn tm. Tht s c mt, tht s tnh gic, ta thy mnh tr v. Bi ny c dch t ting Anh trong t Shambhala Sun, March 28, 2006)