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THE ADDAMS FAMILY
by Larry Wilson and Caroline Thompson
Rewrite by Paul Rudnick
based on the characters of Charles Addams
SHOOTING SCRIPT April 11, 1991
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/6/90 FADE IN: A1 EXT. ADDAMS MANSION FRONT STEPS - CHRISTMAS EVE A1
A GROUP OF CAROLERS, their eager faces upturned, SINGS an endless and cloying roundelay of "Little Drummer Boy." They sing with self-righteous good cheer. As they pompously begin their umpteenth verse, THE CAMERA SLOWLY PANS UP THE ADDAMS MANSION -- past the black wreath on the front door, past broken windows, weather-beaten shingles, a creaking shutter. THE CAMERA CONTINUES TO PAN TO THE ROOF where the Addams Family members, GOMEZ, MORTICIA, GRANNY, PUGSLEY, WEDNESDAY, and LURCH, their faithful butler, gleefully POUR a CAULDRON OF BUBBLING, STEAMING PITCH over the edge. AS THE CAULDRON TIPS, THE CAMERA PUSHES INSIDE, THE BLACKNESS OF THE PITCH FILLS THE SCREEN. TITLES BEGIN. DISSOLVE TO: 1 INT. DIM HALLWAY - SEVEN O'CLOCK A.M. C.U. AN OVER-SIZED "CUCKOO" CLOCK -The clock is a perfect REPLICA OF THE ADDAMS FAMILY HOUSE, down to the creaking shutter. It chimes the hour. In ONE WINDOW, a LITTLE MECHANICAL GOMEZ bends a MECHANICAL MORTICIA back until she's almost off her feet and plants a kiss between her clockwork decolletage. One, two, three mechanical kisses, counting toward seven o'clock. IN ANOTHER WINDOW, A MECHANICAL PUGSLEY hangs a MECHANICAL WEDNESDAY from a noose on a gallows, up and down. Meanwhile, little BURSTS OF FOG float off the rooftop where a little MECHANICAL GRANNY cranks her fog machine. The front door of the house pops open, and a MECHANICAL LURCH appears and begins sweeping. Just then, THING, the disembodied hand with the full-bodied personality, CLIMBS into view over the back of the clock. Thing leaps to the floor and SCAMPERS down the hall. LOW TRACKING SHOT follows Thing along the hallway. (CONTINUED) 1
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 1 CONTINUED:
He runs past a couple of doors, past a pair of LEGS in pajamas, feet in bedroom slippers. He skids to a halt and BACK TRACKS to the legs. He pulls on the cuff of the pajama bottoms. They belong to GOMEZ, who stands in the doorway to A2 INT. FESTER'S ROOM A2
Gomez wears a fez and a smoking jacket over his pajamas. Even at this early hour, he puffs on his trademark cigar. Gomez is all enthusiasm or all despair. At the moment, he radiates unfathomable woe. GOMEZ Think of it, Thing. He's been gone for twenty-five years. For twentyfive years we've attempted to contact Fester in the great beyond... The room is a dusty, cobweb-filled, long-unoccupied shrine to Gomez's lost brother, Fester. Gomez drifts in from the doorway. The room has remained untouched since Fester's disappearance as a teenager. The thick coating of dust and cobwebs adorns the mementoes of a rapscallion's youth - a football pennant from Alcatraz, headless sports trophies, a high school photo with all the other students keeping as much distance from Fester as possible. As he lovingly and morosely surveys the room: GOMEZ ... And for twenty-five years, nothing. Not a whisper, not a clue. I'm beginning to think my my brother truly is lost. Gomez sighs. the B2 Thing TUGS at his cuff, pulling him towards B2
INT. HALLWAY - SAME TIME Galloping ahead of Gomez, Thing leaps onto an old-fashioned door latch and the door swings open INTO
INT. GOMEZ AND MORTICIA'S BEDROOM - SAME TIME Gomez approaches the bed. is... MORTICIA (CONTINUED)
Asleep on scarlet satin sheets
with Morticia. 3. In another corner stands a CYLINDRICAL FLOOR-TO-CEILING FISH TANK. playing with his kid-sized chemistry set. 2 Low-voiced. PUGSLEY'S ROOM . are stacked in the corner. This tubby energetic monster of a nine-year-old boy has every chance of growing up to be the public monster his parents would be proud of. ning wickedly. He MIXES chemicals in a beaker. yes. Morticia OPENS HER EYES. Either way -. Laughing. The brew steams. "Detour! Excavation Ahead!". Grin- He contorts. Completely. The walls of his room are covered with road signs he's collected -.11/28/90 2 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (gazing at Morticia) Look at her -. "Keep Clear! High Voltage!" SAWED-OFF STOP SIGNS.SAME TIME A3 3 Pugsley crouches on the floor.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . darling? MORTICIA (passionately) Oh. she's a ruined beauty. CUT TO: A3 3 OMITTED INT.I would die for her. The ghostly whiteness of her complexion is offset by the red of the pillowcase upon which her hair is spread like a diabolic halo. FILLED WITH PIRANHA. yes. I would kill for her. undergoing the beginnings of a transformation. still on their poles. incisive. A dark Garbo. sultry and remote."Bridge Out!". and subtle. Pugsley SWALLOWS it down. he crawls out of his human-size pajamas. CUT TO: 4 OMITTED 4 . GOMEZ (adoringly) Unhappy. smiles are rare.what bliss. then SHRINKS to the size of a mouse. "Dangerous Undertow!".
along with a collection of glass eyes.SAME TIME Gomez takes Morticia in his arms. Wednesday drops her tooth in the box.. WEDNESDAY Thank you. fangs and dentures.. she is caught in a sudden shaft of sunlight.11/28/90 A5 INT. Morticia's OVERSIZED CARNIVOROUS ORCHID WILTS. She sits on a stool among the stored Addams' family objects. the sun. ONE END OF A STRING TIED TO HER TOOTH. She squints. She's a giggly hag who looks like she was in the bathtub when the hairdryer fell in. Granny tromps up into the attic. Wednesday opens a cigar box. GOMEZ AND MORTICIA'S BEDROOM . Inside the box are assorted human and animal teeth.. As she languidly drapes herself across his chest.. il me perce comme un poignard. that's French! MORTICIA (nonchalant) Oui. GRANNY You kids are going to have to kill your own breakfast this morning. MORTICIA Gomez..SAME TIME 4. A5 Solemn and mournful. Wednesday's pulled tooth swings at the end of the string.. The trap door is flung open. ATTIC . GRANNY pokes her head through.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ (wildly aroused) Tish. Cara mia! (CONTINUED) GOMEZ 5 A6 . Grandmama. THE OTHER TIED TO A TRAP DOOR. On the bedside table beside her. In a foul mood. CUT TO: 5 A6 OMITTED INT. ten-year-old Wednesday has black hair and white skin like her mother.
LEAPS from the bed..SAME TIME At the window. You were like some desperate. CUT TO: 6 EXT. MORTICIA AND GOMEZ'S BEDROOM .where's your fog? (CONTINUED) 7 6 GOMEZ MORTICIA . You frightened me. Gomez pokes his head out. howling demon.. then.. you were. GOMEZ (disturbed) Granny . In the background. suddenly bursting with enthusiasm and a sense of purpose. struggling to churn out its patches of fog.SAME TIME Granny delivers a swift kick to her fog machine. drawing his bedside saber from its sheath and BRANDISHING it at the offending beam. GOMEZ En garde monsieur sole! He thrusts and parries. GRANNY Lousy bucket of bolts. Gomez. straight out of a Jules Verne nightmare.! The FOG MACHINE.THE ADDAMS FAMILY ./EXT.. CUT TO: 7 INT. Do it again. is malfunctioning this morning. unhinged. pantomiming a duel with the shaft of light. Gomez? Querida? MORTICIA Last night.12/3/90 A6 CONTINUED: 5. A6 He kisses his way up to her neck. Morticia brushes her hair with a silver filigree brush. instantly aflame. ROOFTOP .
ENTRANCE HALL . the gigantic family butler. WEDNESDAY (taking her bag) Thank you. smashing through the front porch roof.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Lurch. eager to escape. missing decapitating Gomez by millimeters. a reanimated stitched-together behemoth. He holds two brown paper lunch bags in his enormous hands. (CONTINUED) 8 9 . It crashes below. The bags' contents wriggle. CUT TO: 8 9 OMITTED INT.LATER Standing beside the front door is LURCH.11/28/90 7 CONTINUED: FROM ABOVE 5A. 7 the fog machine hurtles downwards.
while Morticia sips tea.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Judge Womack hurries to his broken window. CUT TO: 10 EXT. and peers inside. covering him with milk. NEIGHBOR'S HOME .SAME TIME JUDGE WOMACK. 9 Lurch 10 Gomez is HITTING GOLF BALLS -. He holds up a bucket of golf balls. Gomez waves back. He tosses his golfclub to Thing.11/6/90 9 CONTINUED: Pugsley takes his bag. shaking his fist: JUDGE WOMACK Damn you. opens it. BALCONY OUTSIDE GOMEZ AND MORTICIA'S BEDROOM SAME TIME 6. who DEPOSITS IT in the golfbag. GOMEZ AND MORTICIA'S BALCONY .SAME TIME FROM THEIR VANTAGE POINT -it appears to Gomez and Morticia that Judge Womack is waving to them. GOMEZ (calls) Sorry about the window. is having his breakfast when Gomez's golf ball lands in his cornflakes.Thing serving as his tee -. 11 ONE OF THE GOLF BALLS flies with incredible speed THROUGH THE WINDOW of the ADDAMS' ONLY NEIGHBOR. (CONTINUED) 13 12 11 . and Pugsley closes the bag. GROWLS. shattering the bowl. Judge! Keep the ball! I have a whole bucketful. the Addams' CRUSTY PATRICIAN NEIGHBOR. CUT TO: 12 INT. This well-tended HOME sits on the hill overlooking the Addams' Mansion like some Republican sentinel. Addams! CUT TO: 13 EXT.
LATER THAT MORNING Morticia. the school bus strains to chug down the road.11/28/90 13 CONTINUED: Gomez joins Morticia watching THE DEPARTING SCHOOL BUS. MORTICIA The little ones. Half-alive. don't they? Too fast. barely human.. Bless them. MORTICIA Imagine.. a rotting shell. THE CONSERVATORY . Gomez sits at a table. Darling. 13 Tires smoking.. CUT TO: GOMEZ A14 B14 . don't torture yourself. That's my job. playing CHESS with Thing.. off to school. GOMEZ (lustfully) Tish. wearing gardening gloves. CUT TO: A14 B14 OMITTED INT. gnawed by guilt. if Fester did come back. is snipping the blossoms off her roses.. GOMEZ They grow up so fast.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . undone by woe.our twenty-fifth seance. MORTICIA (yearningly) Oh Gomez. burning with uncertainty. This very evening -. All those years.. GOMEZ It's a milestone. Tish. THEIR POV MORTICIA 7. Gleefully hanging from the rear bumper is Pugsley. Don't tease. dragging his heels.
Gomez and Morticia both look out. CONSERVATORY . and an embittered grey aura that is the mark of a middle-age misspent. they never cease to be startled by "Gate. clipping him and catching the end of his coat." Tully has a puffy. CUT TO: . approach "GATE. Tully fights Gate for his coat. MORTICIA (looking out) Tully is here. 14 TULLY ALFORD. As they do. as Tully passes through.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . and his wife. the family attorney. JUST OUTSIDE THE ADDAMS' GROUNDS . Margaret is more disappointed in Tully than he is in himself. Thing moves two chess pieces.SAME TIME A15 TULLY Gomez moves a chess piece. Let me go! Ignoring Tully. High-strung and superficial. Thing gestures out the window. GOMEZ (moving a piece) Check." a wrought-iron monstrosity that opens of its own accord. MORTICIA (impressed) Checkmate. TULLY (to Gate) Gimme that! Stop it! I'm warning you! It's not a good day! CUT TO: A15 INT.12/3/90 14 EXT. Margaret passes through Gate first. once handsome face. cheating. Then. MARGARET. Margaret continues stiffly up the walk. Gate slams on him. darling.SAME TIME 8. Thing moves another piece and gestures in triumph. MORTICIA Romping with Gate. Though Tully comes here often and Margaret has been here before. Ha! GOMEZ That Tully.
.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. MARGARET These are your last paying clients.. B15 (CONTINUED) .12/26/90 B15 EXT. may I remind you! TULLY If it gives you pleasure. Tully rips his coat to get it away from Gate..SAME TIME Tully! MARGARET Can't you keep up? TULLY I'm trying. GATE . 8A.
B15 Margaret marches on toward the front door. the charity auction.something dressy. Margaret is more nervous and intimidated than she would ever admit.generations of Addams grotesques in elaborate gilt frames heading toward the imposing doors of Gomez's study. did I marry you? TULLY Because I said yes. About Screwing up her CUT TO: 15 INT. It hisses at Tully as he passes. Margaret resolutely follows. (before Margaret can reply) Don't say it. MARGARET This is all so humiliating. TULLY No loans! I'm not a bum.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . courage. Growling. for evening. Lurch heads for the stairs. I've got a plan. Finding herself alone with Lurch. (CONTINUED) 15 C15 . Why 9. CUT TO: C15 INT.A LITTLE LATER Tully hands his hat to Lurch and marches off toward Gomez's study. skirting the fog machine as if it had every reason to be there. ADDAMS FAMILY PORTRAIT GALLERY . I'll get the money. splattering his trousers with fog. Addams. ENTRY HALL . MARGARET I'm here to see Mrs. Beg. Like a decent coat .2/28/91 B15 CONTINUED: MARGARET Something has to.A LITTLE LATER Tully stalks glumly along the hall and past the family portraits -. Ask-for a loan.
Damn! TULLY 10. Tully proceeds inside.. almost as if having a premonition.?" TULLY regards the portrait intently. dancing around. clamping its jaws onto his trouser cuff.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Fester was utterly hairless with a dead white complexion and eyes rimmed in black like a raccoon's. CUT TO: 16 INT.SAME TIME A SABER slices through the air. 16 . He misses. finally managing to shake it off. strides toward the rug. THE INTRICATELY CARVED DOORS TO GOMEZ'S STUDY creak open. The identifying plaque reads "Fester Addams. 1947 . GOMEZ'S STUDY . He finds himself FACE-TO-FACE with one of the paintings. A PORTRAIT OF THE TEENAGE FESTER ADDAMS draped in black crepe and HOLDING A LIT CANDLE. TULLY'S HAND grabs for the hilt of the sword. brandishing a saber. though how it is holding a lit candle is an utter mystery. 15 There's a He kicks at the rug. THE BLADE embeds in the wall with a thunk. Girding himself. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ It SHUDDERS.11/20/90 15 CONTINUED: ON THE FLOOR lies a BEAR RUG eyes and mouth open. Tully. preoccupied. sudden FEROCIOUS GROWL as he steps on it. He leaps into frame. Missed.. He flails. interrupting the reverie. It BITES him. its blade glinting. At fifteen.
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 16 CONTINUED:
Tully BACK-PEDALS and, as he PULLS the sword from the wall, POINTS TO something behind Gomez. What's that?! Gomez turns to see and Tully CHARGES, wielding the sword as if he means to decapitate Gomez. But Gomez easily PARRIES the blow. GOMEZ Dirty pool, old man! I like it! He shreds Tully's TULLY
Gomez counters, driving Tully back. jacket. Had enough? TULLY
They continue to fence. Gomez flips Tully's briefcase open and a sheaf of legal looking papers spills out. GOMEZ Where's my pen? Never mind, I'll use yours. His blade finds the pen in Tully's inside jacket pocket. He does HANDSPRINGS back to his desk, landing gracefully in his chair. GOMEZ First, the old business! He swivels, warding off another blow, then cavalierly continues the duel as he signs the LEGAL DOCUMENTS scattered before him. CUT TO: 17 INT. ADDAMS ATTIC - SAME TIME Morticia, Granny, and Margaret sort through Addams' possessions. In trunks. Boxed. Stacked. Covered with shrouds. Morticia opens a gigantic, elaborately carved armoire. MORTICIA Perhaps it's in here. GRANNY (mischievously) I don't think so... In the front of the armoire is an overstuffed GARMENT BAG LABELLED 'UNCLE NIKNAK'S WINTER CLOTHES.' (CONTINUED) 17
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/6/90 17 CONTINUED: MORTICIA (full of fond memories) Uncle Niknak's winter wardrobe... She carefully passes the garment bag to Granny who chucks it aside.
The next garment bag is marked 'UNCLE NIKNAK'S SUMMER CLOTHES.' MORTICIA Uncle Niknak's summer wardrobe... She passes this garment bag to Granny who chucks it aside also. Next in the armoire is a BODY BAG. MORTICIA (fonder still) Uncle Niknak. Morticia continues going through the armoire. CUT TO: 18 INT. GOMEZ'S STUDY - SAME TIME Gomez and Tully are still duelling. hasn't even broken a sweat. GOMEZ I wish you'd drop by more often. Tully doggedly fights on. His jacket has suffered more shredding from Gomez's blade. TULLY I'm like to, but... GOMEZ But what, old sport? TULLY Oh, you know... GOMEZ You know what? TULLY I'm a bleeder. (CONTINUED) Still signing. 18 Gomez
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/20/90 18 CONTINUED:
Gomez STOPS DEAD at a document. Deftly, he DISARMS Tully, sending his saber flying up and out of view. GOMEZ What's this? A new proposal? "The Fester Addams Off-Shore Retirement Fund?" What would they do? TULLY What wouldn't they do? It's a very worthy cause and a great addition to the other Fester Addams Funds. GOMEZ (rhapsodizes) Fester - all tribute to thee. called him inhumanly evil. TULLY (protesting) No! GOMEZ Only our parents. I called him brother. TULLY And his memory must live on, forever. Through money. We'll deposit the funds under my name, for tax purposes. Really? GOMEZ That's inspired!
TULLY He would have wanted it that way. Beloved Fester. The sword tumbles back into his hand. duelling. Indeed! GOMEZ For Fester! TULLY A brother! GOMEZ My brother! (CONTINUED) They resume
he rifles through a desk calendar.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . flipping endless pages.. amount... GOMEZ (cont'd) . it's not old business. The perfect (2) 14. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ Next quarter!? . Tully. TULLY Next quarter!? Tully goes to attack like an enraged bull.. GOMEZ It's brilliant! TULLY It's untraceable. Next quarter! Tully has gone white. 18 With one finger. TULLY (taken aback) What? But this is different! It's in my name! Make an exception! GOMEZ Old business is old business and new business is new business and this.11/28/90 18 CONTINUED: TULLY One of a kind! GOMEZ The doctors all said! TULLY Kind to animals! So good with children! GOMEZ They never proved anything. is new business and we don't discuss new business again until. You know the rules better than that. Gomez holds up the proposal... GOMEZ But. It's going to have to wait. TULLY One million dollars. He lands on a distant date...
Thing. The saber skewers the overstuffed chair. 18 Gomez does a KUNG FU BACK FLIP out of his chair -. Gomez reaches for A BOOK.just missing being run through by Tully's saber. Morticia looks over the contents of a nearby shelf. DEN . CUT TO: B20 INT. and carried by the momentum of the charge. Then it turns back to its original position. Gomez carelessly flings away his sword. (CONTINUED) . closing the office doors behind him. VAGUE ANIMAL HOWLS. He PEEKS INTO: 19 A20 OMITTED INT. ATTIC . Tully gets to his feet.GREED. but your riposte a tad rusty. We see the book's title . Tully SOMERSAULTS over the desk.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Tully lies. on the floor. goes through the doors. colliding with the chair.SAME TIME 19 A20 At one of the floor-to-ceiling bookshelves.11/28/90 18 CONTINUED: (3) 15. THE SOUNDS OF CHAINS AND PULLEYS. old man. The entire shelf -. GOMEZ Make yourself comfortable.a secret panel -revolves and deposits Gomez on the other side of the wall. Tully crawls to the doors and slides them open a crack.SAME TIME B20 The armoire has been totally emptied. Gomez GRABS TULLY'S BRIEFCASE and makes a brisk exit. GOMEZ Fine lunge. offering a BEJEWELED TREASURE. Thing sits on the shelf. plucks the sword from the air and resheathes it. FROM BEHIND THE BOOKCASE COME THE SOUNDS OF GOMEZ MAKING HIS DESCENT INTO THE VAULT. and staggers for the bookcase. GROANING. landing on the floor. intent on spying on Gomez. CREAKING. pulling it partway from the shelf. ruined. perched on a decorative Samurai helmet. SPLASHING WATER. while I get the money for the monthly expenses.
MARGARET It must be worth a fortune. Morticia. Margaret is at first afraid to touch it. MORTICIA Hush ..it's for charity. Thing. dragons' heads with gaping jaws at either end. I'm terribly worried. Just what we've been searching for. Margaret isn't listening. (superciliously) Oh. We need more of them. MARGARET (aghast) He coughs up blood? (CONTINUED) She . Margaret? Enchanted by the object. Widows and orphans. A finger trap from the court of Emperor Wu.. he's been coughing up blood. B20 Morticia passes Margaret the JEWEL-ENCRUSTED CYLINDER OF WEBBED GOLD. 16.11/28/90 B20 CONTINUED: MORTICIA There it is. MARGARET (struggling) Mmm? MORTICIA The seance . he can't sleep. (takes the treasure from Thing) Thank you. MARGARET (awed) My God. He won't eat. Look at those emeralds. what is it? MORTICIA A family heirloom. this is too extravagant! Even for the auction! GRANNY Let's keep it. inserts her fingers and they're instantly stuck. Won't you come? It's Gomez. but greed helps her get over it.tonight.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .
a feather duster in his gigantic hands. blowing Tully's hair straight up. Tully reads the title. "GONE WITH THE WIND. then tosses them into Tully's briefcase. weighs a final handful of coins on an old-fashioned measuring scale.. He grins sheepishly at LURCH Who's been watching him from where he dusts in the hall.11/20/90 B20 CONTINUED: (2) 17. TULLY'S BRIEFCASE Now filled with greenish DOUBLOONS. It's dead weight in his hand -..the monthly expenses. Tully reaches for a book. (CONTINUED) 20 . A checkbook. approximately in the same place where Gomez unlocked the secret panel -but Tully's book comes out of its place on the shelf and nothing happens. GOMEZ'S STUDY . CUT TO: 20 INT. it's time.SAME TIME C20 At the bookshelf. Tully snaps the briefcase shut and hoists it from Gomez's desk.. Biting back his frustration. CUT TO: C20 INT. DEN .U. heart pounding. wearing a green accountant's eyeshade. He manages to close the book and. Gomez.. rippling his facial muscles." He opens the cover. B20 MORTICIA (sadly) Well. For the new fund.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ There . Gomez. TULLY (trying to phrase it) I don't suppose you have any paper money in that vault.LATER C. A HURRICANE BLAST OF WIND GUSTS from the open book. not like he used to. returns it to the shelf.another hateful ordeal.
11/28/90 20 CONTINUED: Never! them. Or Fester.I need you here. GOMEZ I broke another of Judge Womack's windows this morning. helplessly enduring another of the Judge's tongue lashings.. GOMEZ Eight o'clock. By the way .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Seance? Tully lugs the briefcase toward the door. GOMEZ The banks . CUT TO: 21 22 thru 26 A27 B27 OMITTED OMITTED 21 22 thru 26 A27 B27 It lands TULLY TULLY OMITTED EXT. Really? GOMEZ (his arm around Tully) Not like you and me.A LITTLE LATER Tully is on the front steps. Tully. Tully resumes his put-upon march to the door. JUDGE WOMACK'S HOUSE . (CONTINUED) . For him. Tully turns back. searching his pockets for the doubloon. expertly in Tully's vest pocket. The seance . 20 (confidentially) Strange people. (Judge Womack won't let him inside). Gomez flips an extra DOUBLOON across the room.I don't trust 18..
.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .11/12/90 B27 CONTINUED: JUDGE WOMACK (to Tully) Still working for Addams.S. Tully steps into D27 INT. TULLY'S LAW OFFICE . aristocratic-seeming 60ish doyenne. Margaret. I can still hear her voice.. clear as a bell.LATER 19.. Alford.. (CONTINUED) .." TULLY ".. MARGARET (still wearing the fingertrap) I'm stuck! JUDGE WOMACK (to Tully) You lowlife. Mr. she'd always say.SAME TIME D27 Sitting in a chair on the client's side of Tully's desk is ABIGAIL CRAVEN. Alarmed. His offices were once quite elegant. day in and day out. B27 C27 Tully enters the secretary's alcove. but now the leather on the chairs is starting to crack and a repainting is long overdue.) She's at lunch. (to Margaret) Are those emeralds? CUT TO: C27 INT." Here's your doubloon. (to Margaret) Mother warned you. "Marry Tully Alford. Tully looks around for his secretary. And you'll hear Satan laugh. TULLY Miss Bradbury .. an arrogant. TULLY'S OFFICE . (annoyed) Miss Bradbury! ABIGAIL (O. still lugging his impossibly heavy briefcase. Her steely will and conniving manipulativeness are barely veiled by a thin layer of polish and good manners..
.. GORDON Mother. but his face falls at the sight of: GORDON CRAVEN Fleshy and round. Mr. Just hear me out. Gordon. special relationship. have have you. (CONTINUED) ... Alford? Tully turns amiably.. (she gestures) You haven't met my son. GORDON Is this the one. impeccably if eccentrically dressed. Gordon has him by the throat. Tully blanches.. I was just about to call you. hold on! to listen to me! You have ABIGAIL We do. Tully sets his heavy briefcase on his desk and shakes her hand. he is IMMEDIATELY THREATENING. TULLY Mrs. your call. Mr. ABIGAIL (to Tully) Gordon and I enjoy a very. Alford? And why? TULLY Please. his dark hair plastered with pomade.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . hanging him upside down from the wall like an oil painting. GORDON (infatuated) She's a pip. Craven. in his 40's. With his barrel chest and his kamikaze demeanor. D27 Instantly obsequious. Mother? deadbeat you mentioned? The Before Tully can react. TULLY (choking) Wait a minute. ABIGAIL I'm certain you were..11/28/90 D27 CONTINUED: 20. I'm wild about him..
& 21A. ABIGAIL We've lent you a considerable sum. Many thousands of dollars. ABIGAIL And how is your wife. crawls toward his desk. Alford? heard so much about her. ABIGAIL (to Gordon) Silly boy. D27 ABIGAIL Refreshing... GORDON She's a saint.. Gordon . I promise. Gordon.... dropping him on his head. Tully TULLY GORDON I've TULLY I don't have the money to repay you. ABIGAIL (re: Gordon) He's so terribly trusting... TULLY Soon. Payment due.I want to believe him. Gordon grabs Tully and sweeps him onto his desk. I've tried everything. So do I. make me proud.. Mr. Still charming? Still spending? Whimpering. Mother. Gordon! Gordon lets go. ABIGAIL Oh. no? (after a beat) Down.THE ADDAMS FAMILY ..1/15/91 D27 CONTINUED: (2): 21. ABIGAIL (sternly) Gordon. (CONTINUED) GORDON ...
The inspiration is obviously born of terror. TULLY (babbling hysterically) It's not what you think! Those are doubloons! For the Addams account! Addams? TULLY There's more. croaky whisper) Fester. but no one can get to it! Don't you think I've tried? ABIGAIL Have you? Have you tried hard enough? Ask him. Gordon is the SPITTING IMAGE OF THE LONG-LOST FESTER.. comes nose-to-nose with Gordon. as he would appear twenty-five years later. The Addams' doubloons Abigail and Gordon light up at the sight of the gold. Mother. there's a fortune. Sweetheart. SPILL OUT. TULLY. They share a malicious smile. The glare from the lightbulb hanging overhead whites out Gordon's hair -making Gordon look as bald as a cue-ball. disbelieving. CUT TO: . It's like a sudden vision. Gordon descends on Tully. D27 TULLY'S BRIEFCASE pops open as it hits the floor.1/15/91 D27 CONTINUED: (3): 22.? Gordon makes a face at his mother. Gordon leers down at the battered Tully..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . No! TULLY Sweetheart! Don't ask! ABIGAIL TULLY'S CRINGING POV Gordon's face hovers inches from his own. GORDON He lied to us. menacingly. TULLY (in a shocked.
ABIGAIL (staring at the picture) It's uncanny.SAME TIME 23. MORTICIA (festively) Children. with stained fiberglass curtains and a splotchy oil painting. GOMEZ (passionately) Hailstones. MORTICIA And lightning. his arms around her waist.. her. E27 27 Gomez stands behind 28 29 A30 A typical. My little boy. highway-style motel room. facing a cracked mirror.11/28/90 E27 EXT. and this hideous creature. Gordon is seated on the bed.. darling.. Morticia leans out the window. consulting a picture of FESTER that Tully has lent them. GOMEZ (nuzzling her) It's a miserable night. MORTICIA (aroused) I know. Seance weather. we're starting! (amused) Put down that antenna! Another LIGHTNING FLASH..SILHOUETTED AGAINST THE NIGHT SKY RAIN. (CONTINUED) GORDON . THE ADDAMS MANSION .EVENING Morticia stands at the open window. rundown. THUNDER AND LIGHTNING! CUT TO: 27 INT.. Abigail stands behind him. ADDAMS MANSION DEN . MOTEL ROOM . (hurt) Mother. CUT TO: 28 29 A30 OMITTED OMITTED INT..THE ADDAMS FAMILY .
I can feel it... right in my fingertips. So can I. my angel . A30 Gordon moans orgasmically as Abigail begins to shave him.no more grubby store-front scams.for now. (putting a towel on Gordon's shoulders) Think of it.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . ENTRYWAY . ABIGAIL (seductively) Shave and a haircut. No more loansharking to scum like Tully Alford. And later. and he'll take the rap. GORDON GORDON 24. 30 31 OMITTED INT.11/14/90 A30 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (correcting herself) Handsome creation. You locate the vault and then we're gone poof! Before they notice what's missing. Margaret wears the same clothes she wore on her earlier visit -. we'll be miles away. Mister? GORDON (breathing heavily) Two bits.the finger trap has made it impossible for her to change. covered with foam. All that delicious money . (CONTINUED) CUT TO: 30 31 . GORDON (intensely) You're so good. And Alford? ABIGAIL We need him .A FEW MINUTES LATER Lurch peels off Margaret's and Tully's wet overcoats. Abigail holds up a shaving brush. ABIGAIL (in his ear) Just one week and out.
Lurch presents a tray of vile-looking canapes. TULLY Get it yourself. Tully. MARGARET Hello..1/15/91 31 CONTINUED: MARGARET What a miserable evening. (holding up her trapped hands) Could you? Wednesday deftly releases the trap from Margaret's fingers. sweetheart. Thank God. Entrails? CUT TO: MORTICIA Morticia ... TULLY Big night for you guys! small fry.. TULLY Give it a rest.. 31 Tully tries to make Hey. Wednesday has come to escort them.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MARGARET Call me a cab. Morticia appears.. Margaret is amazed. MARGARET Give me the car keys.. MORTICIA Welcome.. conversation. She moves away. TULLY Don't add to it. honored guests. Tully reaches out to pat Wednesday's head. motions to the tray. 25. She tries to straighten her disheveled clothes.
on this day of heartsick loss. MORTICIA (O.2/7/91 A32 LURCH AT HIS ORGAN He plays a CRASHING CHORD. A32 .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . at this table of woe.S.) Let us gather. Is everyone comfortable? CUT TO: 25A. in this house of yearning.
Ow! GRANNY What a grip! (CONTINUED) . MORTICIA Sing. Morticia holds a tarnished gold CANDLEHOLDER in the shape of a RAVEN. all souls! Every year on this date. The candle is in its belly and the beams of light glow from its eyes. DEN . the crystal ball in the center. Pugsley has a meat cleaver aimed at his sister. They do.. 32 The family and Tully and Margaret sit at a round table. our beacon to the beyond. Reluctantly. playfully) Pugsley. to generation. Lurch continues to play mood music on the organ. Granny takes a squeamish Margaret's hand. GOMEZ (bemused. O spirits! Harken. we offer a clarion call to Fester Addams. (passing the raven to Wednesday) Do you accept the glorious burden? WEDNESDAY (taking the raven) May it weigh me down through all my melancholy years.SAME TIME 26. to Tully) Kids. WEDNESDAY (to Pugsley) Stop it! GOMEZ (scolding.11/28/90 32 INT. he hands it to Gomez.. In the background. MORTICIA (raising the raven) From generations.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA All close eyes and join hands.
WEDNESDAY (intones) "Let us ransom you from the power of the grave.11/14/90 32 CONTINUED: 27. Pugsley laughs appreciatively. Thing . CUT TO: MORTICIA MORTICIA . but he hangs on tightly. Let us be your plague. Tonight. MORTICIA (affectionately) Mama... Join the fun. Pumpkin.. GRANNY I feel that he's near. Morticia resumes the seance. Granny cackles. Fester Addams. Wednesday. With a last look around the table to insure that everyone has settled down. Margaret sits. leaving her "hand" behind. Still chuckling. to her seat.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Tully pulls her back MARGARET TULLY Sit down." Mama.you're a handful. Margaret tries to shake Thing off.. Margaret tries to escape. Margaret shrieks. Margaret shudders. My hand! GRANNY She's got my hand! Left holding Thing. Ashen.. 32 Granny pulls away. Granny takes a hold of Margaret's now-rigid hand with her own real hand... Excuse me. gather your strength and knock three times. O Death.. Thing lets go and runs off. stiff as a corpse. her sleeve apparently empty. you should know better.
GOMEZ He's at the door! He runs out and through the house to the 38 . Mama.just his hand. barely able to contain his smug enthusiasm.I demand that you knock again! CUT TO: 37 EXT.11/14/90 33 and 34 35 OMITTED 28. Gomez springs to his feet. CUT TO: 38 INT.SAME TIME 37 Waiting for someone to answer. THE FRONT DOOR . He pounds THREE TIMES. DEN . the heavy hollow sound reverberating.. Gordon's hand again KNOCKS THREE TIMES.SAME TIME Granny's eyes pop open. CUT TO: 36 INT. DEN . Lurch hits a crescendo on the organ.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 33 and 34 35 EXT. GOMEZ (urgently) Ask! 36 Ask! GRANNY Fester Addams .SAME TIME The knocking reverberates through the room. GRANNY Did you hear that?! MORTICIA Ask again.SAME TIME We see Gordon's hand on the DOOR KNOCKER . THE FRONT DOOR . TULLY By all means! Tully smirks. Jubilant. Lurch's organ music perfectly underscores and punctuates the scene. Quickly.. this time even harder.
ENTRYWAY/FRONT STOOP .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez breaks the stalemate. Fester! Gomez! Gomez throws open his arms. Morticia looks to Gomez for confirmation. He smothers Fester in an embrace.SAME TIME 29. DRAWING ROOM . Fester's eyes have a hard. she now wears a plain.. He seems immobile. I-dare-you-to-question-me look in them. Pinder-Schloss.FESTER FROM BEYOND./EXT. The exact resemblance is shocking. 40 ABIGAIL I am Dr. Abigail steps forward. enveloping him.11/20/90 39 INT. calculating.. There on the front steps stands GORDON -. Fester continue their face-off. baronial fireplace where an enormous fire burns. Gut evenink. and his clothing and pallor are pure Fester. Gomez and Fester stare at each other. Steam rises off his wet greatcoat. Neither man says a word. She now speaks in a German/Austrian accent.A SHORT WHILE LATER Fester stands by the tall. It seems a miracle. 39 His family at his heels. Gomez eagerly pulls open the front door. and her hair is in braided coils. Gordon's head is completely shaved. 40 FESTER GOMEZ Gomez and MARGARET GRANNY MORTICIA INT. Fester endures it. a pair of shining black ferret eyes. dowdy suit. Could it be? Is that him? TULLY (innocently) Is it possible? Oh my God. (CONTINUED) .
and a complete psychological profile.he is. Can you imagine? Zen . your bruzzer! Boom! Zey gif him to me. tangled in ze tuna net! It vas just last month. At long last. I'm tellink you! Zere are tests.. my oh my go tell it on ze mountaintop . MARGARET Isn't that the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard? TULLY (through gritted teeth) Blossom.1/15/91 40 CONTINUED: 30. 40 Pugsley stands nearby. He vas found in Miami. Fester hates being (CONTINUED) TULLY TULLY . I am bringink him home to you! MARGARET That's preposterous. ze Florida Department of Fish unt ze Game.. and I am bringink him. during ze Hurricane Helga. Ze vaves. Ze sky.. studying the exotic decals.zey drag him from ze ocean. so many tests. beside Fester's steamer trunk. after ze naked unt ze dead. from ze very jaws of oblivion. at Human Services. it vas black like pitch. Gomez slaps Fester companionably. zay vere valls of doom. ze say.. MARGARET But don't you think that's absurd? Honey. Tully nudges her in the ribs to shut up... after all zese years. low unt beholdt. and also beautiful. Margaret.. Ze story .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . touched. ABIGAIL How did zis happen? How did it come to be. GOMEZ It certainly is. after who knows vat heartache..it is most amazink.
Gomez.. FESTER Well. back to share your sorrows. I just don't know.home at long last. 40 GOMEZ And now you're back. TULLY Back to share your joys. I've got a lot of things cooking in the Bermuda Triangle.. MORTICIA (dreamy) The Black Hole of Calcutta. (CONTINUED) .. MORTICIA (aglow with romance) Oh. demonstrates the fingertrap. back to share ..everything! MARGARET Well.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . The Bermuda Triangle. GOMEZ (fondly) Devil's Island. MORTICIA Fester Addams .. Tully hands Margaret the fingertrap to distract her.. TULLY Darling.. Her fingers are instantly stuck again. A week? GOMEZ Don't be ridiculous! You're home! MORTICIA FESTER Sorry. how does this work again? MARGARET An infant would understand. hey ..11/12/90 40 CONTINUED: (2) 31. Margaret.well. at least. but I have to get back. disgusted with Tully. for a week.
it is . you can bet.11/20/90 40 CONTINUED: (3) 32. (CONTINUED) PUGSLEY . Not even for a vacation. MORTICIA (to Abigail) Dr. then pulls out his hand. Pugsley opens the trunk a crack. I really must be goink. To be checkink on Fester's adjustment. his arm inside up to the shoulder. She is instinctively SUSPICIOUS of this new Fester. ABIGAIL (to Wednesday) Oh. The acid has eaten away the lock on Fester's trunk. will you be staying too? ABIGAIL No.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Pugsley is disintegrating the lock with a beakerful of acid and an eyedropper. 40 GOMEZ (to the group) Excuse us.a hard tink to kill. But I vill be back. Cool. Ze human spirit . His fingers are crushed in a rusty. Zere is zo much you do not understandt. my little vun. He fishes among the contents. Everyone knows that. MORTICIA Second honeymoon. Something snaps. WEDNESDAY Nobody gets out of the Bermuda Triangle. Wednesday alone stands apart in her mournful fashion. He grins. ferocious-looking BEAR TRAP. At the steamer trunk. no. Pinder-Schloss.
(CONTINUED) Wednesday CUT TO: 41 42 . dynamite... FESTER (alarmed at what she might find) No. Imprinted below the FACE OF THE BEAUTIFUL GIRL ON THE LEFT is the name FLORA. the camera lingers on the following photographs atop the bureau: A PICTURE OF FESTER AND GOMEZ AS YOUNG BOYS...12/29/90 40 CONTINUED: (4) 33. um. 40 GRANNY (agreeing) Even with a chainsaw. PROUDLY SITTING ON THE LAP OF A BOUND-AND-GAGGED SANTA CLAUS. EACH IN A DOGGY CARRYING CAGE. As she speaks...you must be exhausted.. hard. Fester. 41 42 OMITTED INT. She exits... that's all right. GOMEZ AND FESTER AS BOYS. below the BEAUTIFUL GIRL ON THE RIGHT is FAUNA. MORTICIA A crowbar. Fester examines two photographs in a handtooled leather frame on the bureau.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Let me. Morticia begins removing Fester's burglary equipment from the trunk. BEING HELD BY THEIR FATHER. Morticia begins to open Fester's trunk and go through it.. cyanide.. FESTER'S ROOM . Abigail pinches Wednesday's cheek. you don't have to. FATHER STANDS BESIDE A CRUDE WOODEN SIGN WITH "CAMP CUSTER" BRANDED INTO IT.. (she turns to go) Good night.. continues to stare at Fester.LATER Morticia has shown Fester to his room.. MORTICIA Unpacking . As if we'd run out.
(CONTINUED) WEDNESDAY . This case is about three feet high.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . FESTER It's reserved? For what? For Skipper.12/29/90 42 CONTINUED: It's clear that they are identical twins. he looks out again -. WEDNESDAY (O. FESTER Nosy little brat. 33A. LARGER CASE. staring back at him. Fester is startled. He whips back into his room.. are several STUFFED VAMPIRE BATS.. In this case there ANGLE on the third. taking in the piles of odd objects and memorabilia. He sees . the camera PANS around the room.) It's reserved. ANGLE on the second. Fester's head A43 Fester climbs into the attic. ATTIC . who stands by the empty case. CUT TO: A43 INT. appears. He opens the door to his room and peeks out. Fester approaches a set of GLASS CASES. It is empty..Wednesday's door is shut. The CLOCK in the hall STRIKES MIDNIGHT. Wednesday stands near the trap door. As he does. The camera PULLS BACK. pinned in place. staring at Fester. The case contains a set of mounted BUTTERFLIES. He looks both ways.. Frustrated. but tries to act calm. ANGLE on the FIRST CASE. WEDNESDAY -in her doorway across the hallway.A FEW MINUTES LATER The TRAP DOOR RISES in the attic floor.S. and fairly wide. 42 It's time to go to work. STILL LARGER CASE.
a dog? That 33B.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . would be cruel. FESTER (gruffly) Of course not. I'm sorry. A43 WEDNESDAY No.12/29/90 A43 CONTINUED: For Skipper? FESTER Is he. (CONTINUED) . Skipper isn't a dog...
Getting comfortable. FESTER -goes for the knife he keeps in his boot. The door slams. Yawning.A FEW MINUTES LATER Fester runs back into his room and shuts the door. FINGERS. he lies down. Who knows what terrors they've seen? But now they lose their coldness.12/29/90 A43 CONTINUED: (2) WEDNESDAY He's a bully. which is next to the bed. he burrows deeper.. A43 B43 He sits on the edge of the bed. 34. on the floor. THERE'S A VAGUE FLICKERING FROM ONE OF THE CANDLES.. Fester seizes it and nurses the flame. He backs away from her. CUT TO: B43 INT. A cloud of dust billows around him.FESTER'S EYES. Who's there? He sees . Wednesday has obviously unnerved him.. A SHADOW -thrown huge on the wall. then LIGHTNING ILLUMINATES A HAND GRIPPING THE BEDSPREAD. getting dreamy. CLOSEUP . THE WINDOW EXPLODES OPEN -The wet wind snuffs the candelabra light. sinking into the mattress so deeply that he's almost buried alive... (CONTINUED) A SINISTER HAND WITH WRIGGLING FESTER . Veins in his forehead bulge. FESTER'S ROOM . then he hears the creak of his door opening. using it to relight the rest of the candles. Fester stares at Wednesday.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. As the room fills with candlelight Fester sees . There's only the sound of Fester's animal panting.
watching him sleep. Instantly awake. Fester leaps from the bed. B43 Fester jumps with fear. Gomez enjoying a post-coital cigar. FESTER'S ROOM . listening. CUT TO: 43 INT. Fester's SCREAM is heard distinctly from down the hall. (CONTINUED) 44 . He shakes his leg. pushing against the backboard. and pins him to the floor.MORNING Obviously moved. jumps Gomez. They both smile. Gomez gently lifts him and tucks him into the pocket of his smoking jacket. They gaze together out into the torrential downpour as Fester continues to scream. CUT TO: 44 INT. Thing snoozes on Fester's chest like a kitty cat. MORTICIA (smiling) He's home. Pulling the knife from his boot.2/13/91 B43 CONTINUED: THING -sitting on one of his legs. GOMEZ My own dear brother. They wait. It can only I've got 43 Fester SCREAMS again. her head resting dreamily on his shoulder. he presses the blade against his throat. 35. goosebumps.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . MORTICIA (flirtatiously) I know. certain that Gomez is about to attack him.SAME TIME Gomez and Morticia snuggle in bed in the afterglow of their celebration. mean one thing. GOMEZ Screams in the night. MORTICIA AND GOMEZ'S BEDROOM . violently throwing Thing off. Gomez stands in Fester's room. He SCREAMS.
11/28/90 44 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (very cheerful) Breakfast? 35A. and turns. 44 Gomez JUDO-FLIPS Fester off his chest. GOMEZ Two out of three? CUT TO: .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . He pauses. then springs to his feet. it's good to have you back! Let's go! He leads the way out. GOMEZ Damn.
WEDNESDAY (gazes levelly at Fester) It doesn't make sense. The top is a gigantic grill where innards and various unidentifiable somethings sizzle. We had to chain you to the bedposts. The walls sweat and smoke crawls along the floor. Granny works at a stove that's a coal burning monstrosity. Morticia has seated Fester between Gomez and herself. MORTICIA (to Fester) Sleep well? FESTER Like the dead. Only Pugsley is missing. THE ADDAMS KITCHEN . She's given him an elaborate pewter place setting with a dragon motif. obviously saved for honored guests. Morticia smiles approvingly and passes Wednesday the salt.1/15/91 A45 INT. Throughout. A45 The family eats breakfast in the subterranean kitchen. FESTER (staring at the food on his plate) What is this? MORTICIA Mama's specialite' de la maison.LATER 36. (CONTINUED) . Lurch assists her.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ Really? Who knew the Bermuda Triangle could change a man so much? You used to toss and turn all night. Granny flips these offals onto family members' plates. GRANNY Start with the eyes. WEDNESDAY May I have the salt? MORTICIA What do we say? WEDNESDAY (dutifully) Now. Flames belch out of the oven.
He already feels cornered. You'd be surprised at all the things you don't know. She studies it. Death at sea . WEDNESDAY Ask me anything. MORTICIA She certainly would. Remember Camp Custer? GOMEZ (aglow) For pre-teen offenders? (CONTINUED) .1/15/91 A45 CONTINUED: 36A. Fester turns his back on Wednesday and addresses Gomez.she's hooked. A45 Fester had no idea a simple exchange could be so fraught with pitfalls. FESTER (condescendingly to Wednesday) The Bermuda Triangle is such a large and mysterious place. FESTER Being in my old room sure brings back memories. Wednesday adores the Bermuda Triangle.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .
shushing everyone. keeping her eyes on Fester.. DEN . still on its pole.) SCREECHING SOUND OF CARS heading for a collision is heard. Sorry. Gomez holds up a finger.. (CONTINUED) B45 45 GRANNY . There is a satisfying crunch of metal. A45 Pugsley runs into the room. Granny. Finally. the (O.. GRANNY Who wants seconds? Something in Granny's soup tureen YELPS.. old man . GOMEZ Building a fire.no wandering today. no.LATER Gomez and Fester are in front of the bookcase THAT'S THE ENTRANCE TO THE VAULT. FESTER (guessing) Hanging our stockings. GOMEZ Waiting for Santa to come down the chimney. Just then. GOMEZ No.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez and Fester laugh mischievously. remembering. 37. CUT TO: B45 45 OMITTED INT. Everyone beams. Today we're going straight to the vault.. the CARS COLLIDE.. no. FESTER Aren't memories precious? I'd like to spend today wandering through the house. jabs her ladle into the tureen. Don't be shy.S. dragging a freshly-stolen STOP SIGN.1/15/91 A45 CONTINUED: FESTER And I was thinking about Christmas.
eagerly follows Gomez inside. GOMEZ I feel like . Gomez reaches a SMALL CIRCULAR ROOM." They share a smile. Gomez looks up. leading to the underground river. 45 Gomez reaches for a book. while Fester is wobbly. he punches 46 A47 Gomez grabs one of the chains. UNDERGROUND RIVER 47 B47 C47 The slide deposits Gomez and Fester on a dock.we're children again. THE BOOKCASE SWINGS OPEN. Gomez is all high spirits. B47 C47 OMITTED INT. Fester is petrified. Fester reads the title. Over his head hang HUNDREDS OF RUSTY As he does so.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .MOMENTS LATER Gomez runs gleefully down a flight of STEPS. Gomez is gleeful. CHAINS. "Greed. BENEATH THE SECRET CHAMBER . through a trap door. Fester on the shoulder. THE SECRET CHAMBER .11/20/90 45 CONTINUED: 38. GOMEZ Tag . CUT TO: 47 INT. his hand on Gomez's hand as he goes to pull out the old volume.SECONDS LATER Gomez and Fester are SLIDING DOWN A TWISTING SLIDE. and he and Fester DROP OUT OF VIEW.you're it! Gomez pulls the chain. Fester is right there with him. Fester FESTER CUT TO: 46 A47 OMITTED INT. (CONTINUED) .
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 2/7/91 47 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (inhaling deeply, as if in a meadow) Smell that air, Fester! Fester inhales dutifully. Like a tomb! He gags.
GOMEZ Gomez strides to the end of the dock. Waiting there is a VENETIAN GONDOLA, rundown but still magnificent. Gomez does a running leap to board the gondola. He puts on a straw gondolier's hat and calls out to Fester... GOMEZ Tutti a bordo, fratello mio! (gesturing to the water) The sea - your second home. Fester boards the gondola gingerly, looking queasy. Ship ahoy... Gomez winds an old Victrola as he sorts through a pile of 78's. He puts the needle down on a record and begins to sing along in a bellowing basso profundo. He sets sail, poling down the UNDERGROUND RIVER. CUT TO: A48 and 48 A49 OMITTED A48 and 48 A49 FESTER
INT. ATTIC - SAME TIME Wednesday and Pugsley are exploring the attic, investigating various items. PUGSLEY Do you think that's really Uncle Fester? WEDNESDAY Father says so, but I think Mother isn't sure. Wednesday stands in front of an ELECTRIC CHAIR. (CONTINUED)
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 1/7/91 A49 CONTINUED: WEDNESDAY Pugsley, sit in the chair. Why? WEDNESDAY So we can play a game. PUGSLEY (climbing into the chair) What game? WEDNESDAY It's called... (she thinks) "Is there a God?" CUT TO: 49 INT. ENTRANCE TO THE VAULT - SAME TIME PUGSLEY
Still singing, Gomez poles toward A MASSIVE METAL DOOR, SIX FEET ACROSS AND TEN FEET HIGH, set right into the ROCK OF THE GROTTO. Gomez docks at the narrow ledge in front of the door. Gomez leaps onto the ledge and Fester follows. He's getting excited now, wondering what treasures exist behind this door. The vault... Gomez goes to work on the oversized combination lock. (CONTINUED) FESTER
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 49 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (knowingly, to Fester) Two to the right, ten to the left, and then around to...? FESTER (guessing) Five? GOMEZ (surprised) Eleven. Two, ten, eleven. fingers, toes.
41 & 41A. 49
Fester licks his lips in anticipation. GOMEZ So many years... FESTER Long, barren years... GOMEZ Years that we wasted... FESTER Years we'll bring back... GOMEZ We enter together - a triumphant return! FESTER We enter as brothers - we enter... GOMEZ As one! Gomez slowly opens the door, revealing... 50 51 OMITTED INT. VAULT - SAME TIME 50 51
Rather than a treasure trove, it looks like A DECREPIT NINETEENTH CENTURY MEN'S CLUB -- torn red leather chairs and settees, an assortment of TORTURE DEVICES and HUNTING TROPHIES. An elaborate bar with a cracked mirror. Welcome back! FESTER (very disappointed) Thanks. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 11/28/90 51 CONTINUED: GOMEZ Our secret place. Sanctus sanctorum. If these walls could talk, eh, old man? FESTER (looking around, unsure) What... what would they say? GOMEZ (assumes that Fester is joking) You tell me. You go first. GOMEZ (gesturing to Fester, out of respect) Senior partner... FESTER (desperately) Junior spaceman. GOMEZ First a brandy! (indicating the bar) Do the honors. (opening a large wooden box) I've got a real treat in store. FESTER (grumbling to himself, as he chooses a bottle from the bar) Where is it, you ridiculous imbecile... FESTER
There are a half-dozen excellent brandies on the wellstocked shelf. Fester pockets a silver jigger, then chooses a bottle AND THE BAR SPINS AROUND with Fester, revealing... THE INTERIOR TREASURE ROOM -A STONE CAVERN stacked high with ADDAMS TREASURE -- gold, jewels, bizarre but priceless statuary from around the world. Fester gets one slack-jawed glimpse and THE BAR SPINS AGAIN, depositing him back in the OUTER ROOM. (CONTINUED)
OUTER TREASURE ROOM . Fester pours himself a stiff drink and replaces the bottle on the shelf. He turns -.SAME TIME 53 PUGSLEY 52 A53 B53 GOMEZ Gomez is running home movies. (CONTINUED) . Why? WEDNESDAY So it can kill you. CUT TO: 52 A53 B53 OMITTED OMITTED INT. Showtime! And. and the lights on the chair go on. ATTIC . CUT TO: 53 INT. 51 Gomez has been too busy digging through the box to have noticed Fester's carousel ride. PUGSLEY (after a beat) I knew that.SAME TIME Wednesday is strapping Pugsley's arms and legs into the electric chair. Wednesday pushes a button. He and Fester sit in sideby-side armchairs with the stuffing coming out. with shaking hands. The entire mechanism hums and vibrates. They smoke cigars and drink brandy from extra-large snifters. then who is he? WEDNESDAY Somebody else. PUGSLEY But if he's not Uncle Fester.1/7/91 51 CONTINUED: (2) 43.his arms overflowing with FILM CANS.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . WEDNESDAY It has to warm up.
shark fins strapped to their backs. 53 The young Gomez and Fester. a single hand struggles out of the sand.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. The Addams boys look both sinister and dashing in their tuxedos and Gomez is already smoking his trademark cigar. few yards away. GOMEZ Here! The debutante ball! that fateful night? Remember A FESTER (guessing) Of course. Only Fester's head appears from beneath a mound. The film then JUMP CUTS to: Young Gomez has buried young Fester in the sand at the beach. clearly another person. finally focussing on a head and shoulders shot of Gomez and Fester. GOMEZ What? Come on.1/7/91 53 CONTINUED: ON THE HOME-MOVIE SCREEN -- 43A. sneak around a corner toward a swimming pool crowded with kids. (CONTINUED) .. I've smoked since I was five... Mother insisted. your first cigar. old man. now in their teens. The film JUMP CUTS to: A hand-held 16mm camera weaves its way through a group of ball-goers.
Fester gasps for breath.BEAUTIFUL RED-HEADS with dementia in their eyes. Fester endures the hug. both. Quite the pair. out of foolish pride. Forgotten. Yet. Gomez holds out his arms. Forgiven. GOMEZ (playfully) Say it! Say the password! (CONTINUED) FESTER . You were so dashing. FESTER (holding up a hand. the TWINS from the pictures on Fester's bureau -. eh. Throughout the twins are seen only from the waist up. you could have any woman you wanted.11/28/90 53 CONTINUED: ON THE SCREEN -- 44. I wooed them. very gracious) Water under the bridge. GOMEZ Can you ever forgive me? What? GOMEZ I didn't love them. Gomez? Gomez sighs. 53 the boys flank their dates. Gomez turns the hug into a painful headlock. insanely jealous. I was jealous. dead or alive.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . not to the Bermuda Triangle. I admit that now. and then becomes extremely dramatic. But I never meant to drive you off. FESTER (covering his tracks) Flora and Fauna.
SAME TIME The electric chair is really humming. you demented freak.THE ADDAMS FAMILY ...1/7/91 53 CONTINUED: (2) 45.. GOMEZ (shocked) Did you say. (CONTINUED) . releases Fester. you almost killed me. you demented freak! Fester has accidentally hit on the password. Gomez.. GOMEZ (joyously) Demented freak! CUT TO: 54 and 55 A56 OMITTED 54 and 55 A56 Gomez INT. ATTIC . Pugsley now has the chair's helmet on as well. please... we were children. stop fooling. 53 FESTER (choking) The password? I.. FESTER (turning blue) Please.. I.. Wednesday is about to throw the huge master SWITCH. still gasping) That was a long time ago. perplexed.. lights up..... you remember.. GOMEZ You forgot our secret password? The word we used one hundred times a day? Our special private name for each other? FESTER (rubbing his neck.. GOMEZ (continuing to choke him) Come on. demented freak? FESTER Yes.. I'm choking.. he flings open his arms.
A56 As Wednesday is about to throw the switch. Pinder-Schloss tell a lie? WEDNESDAY Because she wants something. WEDNESDAY I'm going to electrocute him. MORTICIA (a beat) Oh. Wednesday is very solemn....1/7/91 A56 CONTINUED: PUGSLEY But why would Dr. her usual impassive self. WEDNESDAY Do 45A. PUGSLEY (pleading) Please. Morticia pretends to be stern. MORTICIA Children .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . all right. PUGSLEY (sighing) Then just do it.. MORTICIA But we're late for the charity auction..what are you doing? Morticia climbs up into the attic. as we hear the sound of high voltage sizzling Pugsley. ANGLE on Wednesday's face. She smiles and flips the switch. Morticia's head appears from the trap door. then a smile breaks through. CUT TO: MORTICIA . you have a last request? PUGSLEY Can I have ice cream? No.. WEDNESDAY (pleading) Mother. I said no.
1/7/91 56 INT. jewels glittering. BAYSHORE WOMEN'S CLUB .THE ADDAMS FAMILY .LATER C.U. on the FINGERTRAP. then 45B 56 (CONTINUED) .
She beams. Margaret looks (CONTINUED) . standing on the auction block as if she were the item up for auction. over half our proceeds will benefit the elderly and the mentally disabled. JUDGE WOMACK Remember. It was donated by Morticia and Gomez Addams. JUDGE WOMACK acts as the event's auctioneer. Gomez and Morticia sit with their family. who 46. JUDGE WOMACK is surprised at the bid. JUDGE WOMACK I open the bidding at five thousand dollars. staring at the Addams family in horror and disbelief. Next to him. fingers still ensnared in the ancient finger trap. GOMEZ Twenty thousand! MORTICIA For the elderly and the insane -(gazing fondly at Granny) They've earned it. On the stage beside her. and fifteen emerald chips. She wears the same disheveled dress. All the Addamses look at Granny proudly.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . the money we raise goes to help those less fortunate. 56 blushes. They look REACTION SHOTS of various people in the crowd. He reads into the mike from the catalogue: JUDGE WOMACK . She holds her hands aloft. unable to disguise its sleeped-in look..12/3/90 56 CONTINUED: MARGARET ALFORD. confused. encrusted with rubies. This year. around. modestly. Bah! GOMEZ Not enough! He thrusts up his arm..
THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Wednesday glares at her brother. JUDGE WOMACK Twenty-five -MORTICIA bashfully raises her hand. JUDGE WOMACK I have twenty -GOMEZ (interrupts) Twenty-five! (to Morticia) Cara mia... He has a PEASHOOTER in his mouth. MARGARET (to Judge Womack) What are they doing? Judge Womack shushes her. ANGLE on Wednesday. MARGARET pesters the Judge Womack. and holds out her hand. Fester takes Morticia's opera glasses and peers appraisingly at the glittering finger trap. He smiles greedily. (CONTINUED) . aimed at Judge Womack. MORTICIA Thirty.. (to Gomez) Mon sauvage.. She now has the PEASHOOTER in her mouth. He sheepishly passes her the peashooter. Wednesday sheepishly hands Granny the peashooter. ANGLE on Pugsley. aimed at Judge Womack.. GOMEZ raises his hand. Judge Womack gives her a look that says shut up.2/19/91 56 CONTINUED: (2) 47.. 56 MARGARET What are they doing? It's theirs. Granny gives her a stern look.
. He does so. Fifty! Morticia has raised her arm. MORTICIA You spoil me.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. MORTICIA raises her hand..2/19/91 56 CONTINUED: (3) 47A. She lowers it.. GOMEZ It's yours. as Margaret's jaw drops... 56 GOMEZ Thirty-five! (to Morticia) Eres divina! MARGARET is increasingly agitated. Gomez utters a little cry of wild passion. JUDGE WOMACK I have fifty thousand dollars. THE FLABBERGASTED JUDGE WOMACK repeats breathlessly. mon amour. my ecstacy. (CONTINUED) MORTICIA . MORTICIA Your turn. Judge Womack hammers his gavel. passionately. amore mio... MARGARET (to Judge Womack) But I don't understand. but keeps it extended for Gomez to kiss.
beside him. She and the children share a conspiratorial smile. ADDAMS MANSION . As he does so. He stares at it. trying to free them.2/19/91 56 CONTINUED: (4) 48. in disgust. then leans forward from his place on the other side of Morticia and.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Morticia. and grabs his neck. 56 JUDGE WOMACK Sold to Morticia Addams for fifty thousand dollars! Judge Womack shakes his head. frowns at Fester. CUT TO: 57 58 OMITTED INT. a projectile HITS HIS NECK. FESTER has his fingers TRAPPED in it. eyebrows knitted. MORTICIA Isn't it too enchanting? Fester pulls his fingers. she has clearly just scored the hit on Judge Womack. DUESENBERG . Of course. CUT TO: A59 . 57 58 Gomez shares a look with Wednesday. FESTER How do you take it off? Morticia releases it for him. ANGLE on Granny. He YELPS. almost as if he were hypnotized. admires it also.NIGHT Several windows are lit. CUT TO: A59 EXT.DUSK CLOSEUP ON THE FINGER TRAP -The jewels glinting in the passing lights. with the peashooter in her mouth. MORTICIA There's a trick to it.
And it belongs in the family. almost MORTICIA Gomez. trying to free them. Gomez shares a look with Wednesday. DUESENBERG . 48A. 58 INT. FESTER has his fingers TRAPPED in it.. Fester pulls his fingers. You GOMEZ It's for charity. then leans forward from his place on the other side of Morticia and. Of course. CUT TO: .DUSK CLOSEUP ON THE FINGER TRAP -The jewels glinting in the passing lights.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . eyebrows knitted. FESTER How do you take it off? Morticia releases it for him. bought the fingertrap.. as if hypnotized. 58 He stares at it. you shouldn't have. frowns at Fester.2/7/91 ALTERNATE SCENE 58. MORTICIA There's a trick to it.
11/20/90 59 INT. then tosses it aside as if touching it burned him. CUT TO: 60 A61 OMITTED INT.S.LATER 49. with cool professionalism. GOMEZ (ranting to Thing) 'How do you take it off?' That's absurd! That finger trap was a party favor at his tenth birthday! Gomez demonically starts his SECOND TRAIN. setting it on a sure collision course with the first. DINING ROOM .P. The LIONEL TRAIN races through the remains of a strip mined mountain terrace. He stares at the picture.BEDTIME Preparing to go to the vault. and proceeds with his preparations. Fester. then paces back and forth in front of Gomez's transformers. man. (CONTINUED) 61 60 A61 . CUT TO: 61 INT. 59 Gomez's elaborate MODEL TRAIN LAYOUT fills the room. Thing gallops into view around one of the mountains. FESTER'S ROOM . toward the inevitable. the model trains race toward one another.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . He picks up the nitro. He reaches into the drawer for the nitro-glycerine and comes up with the photo of the young Fester and Gomez being brought home from Camp Custer by the U. Gomez rants to Thing. His emotions churning like the locomotive wheels. slips his safe-cracking tools into the bandoliers strapped across his chest. DINING ROOM .SAME TIME Puffing black smoke.
See the fire trucks? From Gomez's train room. (CONTINUED) . She turns to the second book. Two books are propped up.and he slept so well! Thing paces furiously.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . and the kitchen table shakes. CUT TO: A62 INT. 61 GOMEZ He wore that finger trap for two years! Mother had to teach him how to eat with his feet! And the combination. and the password. a TRAIN WHISTLE pierces the night. we see the title The Joy of Cooking. Wednesday and Pugsley. in pajamas. followed by another WHISTLE BLAST. Yes. PUGSLEY'S ROOM . looking at the album. no. MORTICIA (worried) Oh. The sound of Gomez's trains has begun to RESOUND throughout the house. There is a stack of books on the table. and my cigar . Granny looks up from her reading. reading cookbooks.SAME TIME A62 Granny sits at the kitchen table. we hear a voice howl "ALL ABOARD!". As Granny reads.1/15/91 61 CONTINUED: 50. KITCHEN . WEDNESDAY Where are they? MORTICIA At a birthday party. sit beside her. PUGSLEY Father's playing with his trains. CUT TO: 62 INT. PUGSLEY (pointing at a picture) Is that Father.Gray's Anatomy.SAME TIME 62 Morticia is seated on the bed. she has a family photo album on her lap. we see the title . when he was little? MORTICIA (also pointing) And that's Uncle Fester. Granny reads from the first book.
FROM INSIDE ONE OF THE TRAINS -A LITTLE PASSENGER LOOKS OUT. wearing his nightshirt and cap.. CUT TO: 64 INT. looking troubled. 62 A63 Grimly determined.SAME TIME 50A. CUT TO: A63 INT. Fester removes the well-worn copy of "Greed" from the shelf and the secret panel opens. Lurch's needle slips from the noise.. almost to the boiling point. seeing if that will make it turn. He pushes against it. He is sewing a button on a shirt -a gentle giant.11/20/90 62 CONTINUED: WEDNESDAY He must be upset. He's headed for the vault.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . He sucks on his finger. The CHUG of the trains now SHAKES the entire house. THE SECRET CHAMBER .SAME TIME The model trains WHISTLE AT FULL BLAST. He looks above and there hang. Then he remembers. CUT TO: 63 INT. shrieking in warning as they round Dead Man's Curve.. heading for each other.hobbies. CUT TO: A65 INT. and he pricks his finger. DINING ROOM . He passes Gomez still raving.SAME TIME Fester is at the INTERIOR WALL. THE COUNTLESS CHAINS-(CONTINUED) A65 64 63 . MORTICIA It's always a bad sign -.. LURCH'S BEDROOM . ADDAMS LIBRARY .SAME TIME Lurch is sitting up in his too-small bed. GOMEZ These thoughts! I'm in torment! What is truth? What is fiction? Thing pounds the table in frustration.
(trying to hide her anxiety) But let's get to bed. Now. B65 . ANOTHER BLAST. PUGSLEY'S ROOM . The CHAIN YANKS BACK. A65 Which chain to From far above in the house. MORTICIA So do I. Fester hears the distant train whistle..SAME TIME Morticia and the children are listening to the sounds of the trains. WEDNESDAY Is that man really Uncle Fester? Uncle Fester WHOOSHES through the floor-to-cealing piranha tank. the chain rockets him. pull? 51. CUT TO: B65 INT.. Fester disappears into the gap. He randomly yanks one of the chains. PUGSLEY (listening) He's using the diesel. A SHRILL BLAST is heard. WEDNESDAY I know what he's worried about. now a CHUGGING.11/28/90 A65 CONTINUED: each with a rusted metal grip on the end. Another BLAST. toward a NARROW GAP IN WHAT MAY OR MAY NOT BE A CEILING. have you brushed your teeth and washed behind your ears? I did... With a screech of pulleys and geers. pulling Fester straight upwards.. MORTICIA (very concerned) Dead Man's Curve. Only Morticia sees this.. WEDNESDAY The covered bridge. WHISTLING CACOPHONY.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . CUT TO: PUGSLEY I'm sorry. darling. hanging on for dear life.
GOMEZ (falling to his knees) Spirits above me . & 53. 65 66 A67 B67 C67 67 and 68 69 & 70 71 72 OMITTED OMITTED OMITTED .give me a sign! Shall I be joyous? Or shall I be damned? The TRAINS COLLIDE! Metal rends. CUT TO: 66 A67 B67 C67 67 and 68 69 & 70 71 72 OMITTED OMITTED OMITTED OMITTED OMITTED 52.11/20/90 65 INT.SAME TIME The TRAIN CRASH is imminent.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . DINING ROOM . Smoke and flames.
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 2/15/91 73 EXT. YARD - MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT A COAL CHUTE set in the side of the house DROPS open depositing the soaked, disoriented Fester AT THE FEET OF MORTICIA
Silhouetted by the full moon, she stands regally above him, waiting for him, her velvet cloak covering her night clothes. MORTICIA (pointedly) Sleepless night? Walk with me, Fester. She turns and glides away. follow. Fester has no choice but to CUT TO: 74 EXT. BACK OF HOUSE/THE CEMETERY - MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT Morticia leads Fester into the chill of the cemetery. They follow a STONES of the everywhere -in their open path that winds among the ELABORATE TOMBAddams dead. Gomez's golfballs are on the ground, in statues' upturned hands, mouths. 74
As they pass them, Morticia points out various monuments. The marble statues look so real they could be alive. MORTICIA Aunt Laborgia - executed by a firing squad. Cousin Fledge - torn limb from limb by four wild horses. And darling Uncle Eimar... Uncle Eimar is a hooded executioner with an upraised ax. There is an UNEARTHLY MOAN, seeming to come from the tomb. MORTICIA Buried alive. Psychopaths, fiends, mad-dog killers - roots, Fester. Pioneers. Lest we forget. Among the statuary is a MARBLE VULTURE, posed with the dignity of an eagle on a flagpole, but the flagpole is actually a replica of Fester's bald head. (CONTINUED)
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 3/18/91 74 CONTINUED: MORTICIA Your beloved Muerto. After you left, he was simply... a different vulture. He wouldn't circle. He wouldn't peck. That's how much you mean to this family.
They reach the MAUSOLEUM where MOTHER AND FATHER ADDAMS lie. It stands on a knoll, the HIGHEST POINT IN THE CEMETERY. Poison ivy covers the dilapidated Greco-Roman tomb. Mother and Father Addams have been depicted as a god and a goddess, charioteers driving their steeds to the netherworld. Father Addams smokes the ubiquitous Addams cigar. Morticia gazes up at the likenesses of Mother and Father Addams. But Fester averts his eyes -- the faces seem to be STARING DIRECTLY AT HIM. MORTICIA Mother and Father Addams... Imagine what we owe them. Oh, Fester, how I wish the children could have known them better. But tell that to an angry mob. She turns to trace the FAMILY CREST, carved into the mausoleum. THE TOP OF THE CREST IS A VULTURE. THE BACKGROUND IS COMPOSED OF THREE LION'S HEADS -- IN ONE PANEL, A HUNTSMAN HOLDS OPEN THE LION'S HEAD; IN ANOTHER PANEL, THE LION HAS SWALLOWED HIM UP TO HIS TORSO; IN THE LAST PANEL, THE LION HAS SWALLOWED THE HUNTSMAN COMPLETELY BUT FOR ONE DANGLING FOOT. ON A BANNER AT THE BOTTOM IS THE FAMILY MOTTO IN LATIN. MORTICIA Three lions rampant. The vulture ascendant. And our credo "Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc." "We gladly feast on those who would subdue us." (reflective) Not just pretty words. As an Addams, you understand completely, don't you? She stares levelly at him. FESTER As an Addams, yes, I do. (CONTINUED)
THE ADDAMS FAMILY - 1/15/91 74 CONTINUED: (2)
MORTICIA (after another beat) Good night, Fester. She heads toward the house. She turns.
MORTICIA Rest in peace. CUT TO: 75 INT. HALLWAY - EARLY MORNING Fester is on the phone hunched over, his eyes darting to make sure no one overhears. FESTER (into phone) They're on to me, Mother! I'm almost sure!... Of course, I've tried, I still can't find it... you've got to get over here. Wednesday is bound and gagged on a chair in the background. Pugsley runs up to Fester with two bottles of poison. Fester, vaguely impatient, points to one. Pugsley nods and runs off. FESTER (into phone) ... Don't say that... (tenderly) ... You know that I do... CUT TO: A76 B76 OMITTED INT. ADDAMS KITCHEN - A FEW MINUTES LATER Granny and Lurch are doing the dishes; Granny rinses and Lurch dries. Lurch then hands each dish to Thing, who stacks them. Morticia sits at the kitchen table, sipping a cup of tea. Wednesday stands before Morticia, holding up a large, nasty-looking carving knife. MORTICIA (to Wednesday) Is that for your brother? Wednesday nods. (CONTINUED) A76 B76 75
GRANNY (still looking) Financial... the children are beside themselves .. GRANNY Troubled husbands. even nastierlooking knife. Mama.. Wednesday takes the knife and exits. GRANNY Well. troubled husbands. MORTICIA Is there an index? GRANNY Here it is . money troubles. MORTICIA (worried) His trains are everywhere. no. Oh.. adultery. She starts thumbing through the pages.this can't go on. 56A. Granny wipes her hands and opens a large. GRANNY (still looking) Turned into a toad or reptile. let's look it up. B76 Morticia hands Wednesday a much larger. No.suspicion and anxiety.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. ragged leatherbound book.. How can I help him? Tell me. MORTICIA (eagerly) What does it say? (CONTINUED) MORTICIA MORTICIA ..1/15/91 B76 CONTINUED: MORTICIA (taking the knife) I don't think so. in husbands.
they all are. ABIGAIL Really? Well.. CUT TO: FESTER . Really. MORTICIA (offended) I can't do that. replace it with vinegar overnight. kneading his hands. Add milk. What? ABIGAIL (smiling) I'm a doctor. CUT TO: C76 INT. years ago. Smear his forehead. It's barbaric. thank God I came over. Leave a headless rooster beneath his pillow. He's suspicious.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gordon.1/15/91 B76 CONTINUED: GRANNY (reading) Drain all his blood. B76 C76 Fester is sitting on the bed. studying various objects with disdain. FESTER They know I'm a fraud! The whole bunch! It's not going to work! Who knows? moron? ABIGAIL Gomez. palms and feet with the tears of a stillborn monkey. Abigail is calmly inspecting the room. Remember. then disdainfully) Milk. Ease their distress. I'm surprised at you. It's my calling. (a beat. Lurch growls in agreement. very upset. UNCLE FESTER'S BEDROOM .SAME TIME 56B. Mama. that over-heated FESTER He's no moron! He's Fester's brother. they had some awful fight. I can tell. I can counsel the troubled family..
MORTICIA (to Gomez) Dr. (to Abigail) Should Gomez speak with Fester? He's right outside the door. ADDAMS DRAWING ROOM .A FEW MINUTES LATER Gomez and Morticia sit with Abigail. 76 (CONTINUED) . Pinder-Schloss is here to help.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 56C.1/15/91 76 INT.
S.) Who calls me a villain? Breaks my pate across? Plucks off my beard and blows it in my face? WEDNESDAY (O. Pugsley runs Wednesday through.. I will! Fester gets a genuine gleam in his eye.S. She staggers. 76 Gomez gets up and stalks toward the door. when he hears. but that's not! That's an impostor! An impostore! OUTSIDE THE DOOR -Fester hears and STORMS OFF. hack and slice.. smiling. then falls dead.if that were Fester. WEDNESDAY (O. 77 INT. (CONTINUED) . SWORDS DRAWN. No! No! FESTER Gimme that sword. talking louder and louder. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY . Pugsley and Wednesday thrust and parry.11/6/90 76 CONTINUED: GOMEZ I would speak with Fester. damned villain! PUGSLEY (O.S.) O villain.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . DUELLING. GOMEZ -. 78 FESTER 77 Pugsley hands him the sword. Wednesday backs Pugsley in. villain. Bloodshed! He hurries back to the 78 TOP OF THE STAIRCASE and looks down into the FRONT HALL where.SAME TIME Fester is marching toward his room. 57.) If I must strike you dead...
Morticia shakes her head. DRAWING ROOM SAME TIME 58.. GOMEZ . They are ABIGAIL I vill (CONTINUED) . Jais? Ze theory of displacement . explain.A faker! A phony! An utter fraud! A base. Addams. FESTER No excuse. the sword still to her throat) That's what I said. GOMEZ (excited) Is it unpleasant? Deeply. Gomez sits beside Morticia. 78 79 Gomez is still raving.. he takes her hand. WEDNESDAY (agreeing.is zis familiar? GOMEZ (impressed) Tish? No. both fascinated.11/28/90 78 CONTINUED: FESTER Haven't you ever slaughtered anyone? WEDNESDAY (referring to Pugsley.. solemnly) He's only a child.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . ABIGAIL Ha! It is too exciting. (pointing the sword at Wednesday's throat) Aim for a major artery. CUT TO: 79 INT.. The jugular. I beleef I am understandink. I vill help. deceitful-ABIGAIL (interrupting) Mr.
He's sullen. Go! Off viz you! But zen . but you resent him. MORTICIA (egging him on) He's furtive. You suspect tinks. I do? MORTICIA (impressed) Of course. was an accident. You luff him. ze bubble and ze collide. hate. hate. am seeink it every day... no? GOMEZ But.you displace..you drive him avay. MORTICIA I It GOMEZ GOMEZ 59.. luff. GOMEZ Displacement! How bizarre. I didn't hate my mother. I imagined Fester was the problem... Pugsley? ABIGAIL Guilt. Like for Mama.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Luff. He sulks. 79 (CONTINUED) ... ABIGAIL Ze feelinks in your brain cells..11/28/90 79 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL Your very own bruzzer . GOMEZ (excited) He's backstabbing..you are feelink ze little black monster. and here.... MORTICIA (sincerely) Lucky doctor. Jais! Your bruzzer returns.. you feel guilty . ABIGAIL It is a very common psychosis.
. CUT TO: .. MORTICIA (decisively) But that's love! GOMEZ (jumping to his feet) By God.. Dr. MORTICIA You're unbalanced. GOMEZ And I hate him. 79 GOMEZ I suspect him. MORTICIA Thank you.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . ABIGAIL I do vat I can... you're right! He is Fester! Gomez is suddenly jubilant again. Pinder-Schloss.11/28/90 79 CONTINUED: (2) 59A..
PUGSLEY Uncle Fester. C. on the book's cover. AND GOUGES. 80 A81 Fester is seated on a leather couch. he has clearly just caused the explosion.SAME TIME 60. turning another page) Look. as dirt and debris go flying. ancient BOOK which Fester holds open in his lap.U. Pugsley and Wednesday are snuggled up on either side. (CONTINUED) B81 PUGSLEY .a new chapter! Oh. SCARS FESTER You see. children? There's a lot to learn. WEDNESDAY'S ROOM . how do you know so much? FESTER I've been around. (turning the page) Gangrene. crouched over a detonator. children . PUGSLEY AND WEDNESDAY (enthralled) Scabs. WEDNESDAY (still suspicious) In the Bermuda Triangle? FESTER (ignoring her. Wednesday and Pugsley stand or crouch beside him. CUT TO: B81 OMITTED An EXPLOSION fills the screen. The title reads WOUNDS.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . As the smoke clears ANGLE ON Fester. boy! FESTER. I pick things up.3/18/91 80 A81 OMITTED INT. They are all looking at an enormous.
It's perfect for small homes. high above Fester and the children. as if it were Christmas Day. yes. with a nitroglycerin cap. carports and toolsheds.3/18/91 B81 CONTINUED: FEATER Three parts dynamite. Abigail stands at the window.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .A FEW MINUTES LATER ABIGAIL (in her real voice) Everyone will be at the children's play tonight. I've been working with them. FESTER'S ROOM . CUT TO: 81 INT. It's going to be fun! (CONTINUED) 81 . WEDNESDAY What about picnics? 60A. correct? FESTER Oh. looking out. He reaches into a crate and holds up a HAND GRENADE. B81 Fester smiles approvingly. The children's eyes sparkle. ANGLE on the window of FESTER'S ROOM. She is not pleased.
. Gordon. this is no time for theatre. the vault. Abigail hugs Fester's head to her bosom.11/14/90 81 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (livid) Fun? Is that what we're here FUN? 61. FESTER But. my reason to live. looking out over the cemetery. my treasure? My heartbeat? It beats only for you.. (CONTINUED) . ROOF .. I'm sorry! You see what they've driven me to? I've raised a hand to my child... Then she immediately grabs him and ABIGAIL Darling.EVENING Fester stands alone on the roof.. ABIGAIL Soon we'll have the money. Listen closely ." FESTER I do hear it. hugs him. ABIGAIL The house will be deserted! vault will be ours! But.. "Gordon.it says.. brooding... the kids.... ABIGAIL Can you hear it. (she gives his head a twist and becomes quite fierce) Understood? CUT TO: 82 thru 85 86 OMITTED 82 thru 85 86 FESTER The EXT.. You can't go to the play... and we'll be far from here.. Loving mother.. I love you. grateful son.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 81 Fun? for? She SLAPS Fester.
in the way. FESTER 62.) There you are! At last! Gomez joins Fester at the railing. Gomez holds out his hand. GOMEZ Precisely .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . It is morbid and magnificent in the moonlight..S. old man. Displacement . You belong here. Unidentified beasties gambol. In the way? GOMEZ A brother? FESTER Gomez. Wonderful kids. GOMEZ The primeval ooze. Fumes.it's a common psychosis. Gomez passes the club to Fester. 86 Beaming.. Fester. A dance in a graveyard. What a lovely woman . But.life is all fun and games.so chilly. Fester. It's all ours.. Pinder-Schloss explained everything. Thing supplies Gomez with another club. Gomez gazes down into the cemetery. GOMEZ Look at it. take care. We can't do that again. Toxic waste. (gesturing to the swamp) A wasteland. things change. I'm. Fester. Thing is there with a golf club. (CONTINUED) .12/3/90 86 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (O. You're home. Stench and decay. You have a beautiful wife. For you .. GOMEZ What a fool I was to doubt you! Dr.you're back! Those years apart. Quicksand. Isn't that grand? Is it? Gomez slaps an arm around him. FESTER You don't know what you're asking. Patches of fog crawl. The swamp bubbles.
and over the cemetery. FESTER I changed my mind! CUT TO: 88 thru 90 A91 OMITTED 88 thru 90 A91 Come to A87 87 GOMEZ EXT. CUT TO: . Wednesday and Pugsley appear in the doorway. PUGSLEY Come on.11/28/90 86 CONTINUED: (2) 63. into the darkness. As the by-standers gape.LATER Fester sits on the edge of his bed. Lurch steps out of the car. the play. we hear the sound of a WINDOW BREAKING. with great ceremony. 86 The two men hit golfballs off the roof. Fore! CUT TO: A87 87 OMITTED INT. By-standers eye the strange and wondrous automobile. FESTER'S ROOM .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . FESTER I said I was busy! WEDNESDAY But you said you'd help us.NIGHT The Duesenberg pulls up in front of the school building. as if attending the Academy Awards. Uncle Fester. In the distance. With the Shakespeare. OS. and opens the rear door. the Addams family steps out of the car. brooding. And the pus. SCHOOL .
THE ADDAMS FAMILY . (she pints to a photo of Diane Sawyer.2/26/91 B91 INT. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM LOBBY . Wednesday's teacher. He hurries. CUT TO: C91 INT. He appears to be building a bomb. but frankly.NIGHT 63A. Have you ever heard from your husband? CUT TO: B91A INT. people we love and admire. Susan is Wednesday's teacher. frazzled and a little too eager. she's wholesome. Mrs. (she points to a magazine cover of President Bush. As the Addamses enter. He looks at the clock. Susan Ringo has chosen the President. SUSAN Wednesday is an excellent student. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM LOBBY . SUSAN FIRKINS. hanging next to a child's essay) Isn't that sweet? And Harmony Feld has picked Diane Sawyer. Ms. You see.SAME TIME B91A MORTICIA SUSAN At his desk now. Fester works with great concentrations. hanging next to Harmony's essay) MORTICIA (concerned) Have you spoken to her parents? (CONTINUED) . Addams? Yes? SUSAN Could I see you for a moment? I'm Susan Firkins. This month our theme is "Our Heroes". of course. This is our class bulletin board.A MINUTE LATER C91 Susan Firkins is showing Morticia a bulletin board hanging on one side of the lobby. B91 The lobby is crowed with the families of students. a young woman. MORTICIA Oh. Furkins Wednesday's told us so much about you. I'm concerned. FESTER'S ROOM . approaches Morticia.
college first. and enslaved a minister. we've told Wednesday . yes. The Alford's son. with her mouth hanging open. SUSAN (shocked) Really? MORTICIA Oh. MARGARET (holding her son's shoulders) Isn't he adorable? I made this myself. But don't worry. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM LOBBY . MORTICIA (touched and very proud) Wednesday's Great Aunt Calpurnia. is wearing a felt ELF COSTUME. MORTICIA It's charming.. TULLY JR.NIGHT 63B. What is he -. They say she danced naked in the town square." (she points to a photo of an oil painting of an evil-looking crone.1/7/91 C91 CONTINUED: SUSAN (not comprehending) But Wednesday brought in this picture . ANGLE on Susan.a lizard? (CONTINUED) . CUT TO: 91 INT. She was burned as a witch in 1706.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . C91 91 Tully and Margaret are chatting with the Addamses."Calpurnia Addams.
Fester works with great concentration. Why. and he's home alone.that's better. 64. He looks at the clock." GRANNY Toad on a stick! Get your red hot toad on a stick! Can't enjoy the show without your toad on a stick! A92 INT. We're all out on a jaunt.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Not to brag but I've got a beautiful little nine hole pitch-and-putt-set up in my cemetery.11/12/90 91 CONTINUED: MARGARET An elf. Margaret.SAME TIME Gomez attempts to schmooze Judge Womack.as usual. hawking another of Granny's "delicacies. CUT TO: B92 INT. TULLY (his eyes gleaming) What a shame. in that big empty house. You are just too precious for words. He hurries. I could just eat you alive! No. (CONTINUED) B92 . FESTER'S ROOM . Granny and Lurch appear. um. 91 TULLY So Gomez. JUDGE WOMACK I'd rather rot in hell.SAME TIME A92 At his desk now. MORTICIA Too young.'s face with a Kleenex) Look at you . where's Fester this evening? GOMEZ Moody -. He appears to be building a bomb. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM . (she kneels and wipes Tully Jr. GOMEZ I was hoping you'd come over and play a round of golf.
11/28/90 B92 CONTINUED: GOMEZ Ahhh.SAME TIME Abigail is hammering on the door with the knocker. a previous engagement. 65. in her chair... MORTICIA The children are next. CUT TO: C92 92 OMITTED INT... reflected in the mirror. (very harsh. peering in windows. Gordon. ABIGAIL (whispering. He thrusts a package toward them. CUT TO: B93 A93 C92 92 . Wednesday and Pugsley are putting on their armor. FESTER I changed my mind..LATER A HALF DOZEN ADORABLE SEVEN YEAR OLDS are on stage singing "We Are The World. BACKSTAGE .. B92 He tucks one of his cigars in Judge Womack's breast pocket and heads off to join his family.. banging the knocker) Dammit. Lurch stops fidgeting and Granny sits up straight." They finish to the enthusiastic applause of the AUDITORIUM FULL OF PARENTS. Fester is suddenly behind them.SAME TIME Sitting at the make-up mirror. CUT TO: B93 EXT. sweetly) Gordon. CUT TO: A93 INT.. ADDAMS HOUSE . VARIETY SHOW STAGE . bored. it's Mother.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . where are you! I should never have used him! She clomps down the porch steps and heads around the side of the house. Morticia and Gomez politely join in while Lurch fidgets and Granny slumps.
Standing on tiptoes. She gapes down at them and screams. old man. GOMEZ (whispers) I knew you couldn't stay away. CUT TO: 93 INT. hear her and no escape. AT HER ANKLES -VINES snake out from a window well. ADDAMS MANSION.2/15/91 C93 INT. 66. They both press the attack. Pugsley SLASHES WEDNESDAY'S JUGULAR. and spur my dull revenge! O. from this time forth. Virginia tries yet another window. CUT TO: D93 EXT. She makes horrible GURGLING NOISES.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . VARIETY SHOW STAGE. PUGSLEY A hit. AUDITORIUM. my thoughts be bloody or be nothing worth! If I must strike you dead. SAME TIME. HER SLEEVE RENDS AND BLOOD SPURTS. Fester forces his way to where his family is seated. around her ankles. preparing to pull her under. drawing blood. C93 Pushing people aside. In a fatal blow. WEDNESDAY O proud death! What feast is toward in thine eternal cell? (CONTINUED) 93 . They wrap firmly There's no one to D93 The vines go taut." As they duel. Pugsley and Wednesday in their elaborate costumes are drawing to the climax of their scene from "Hamlet. I will! Pugsley lands the first blow. BLOOD SPURTS in arterial squirts. SAME TIME. they act their little Addams' hearts out. a very palpable hit. slashing Wednesday's arm. They're happy to see him. WEDNESDAY How all occasions do inform against me. A SHORT WHILE LATER.
2/15/91 93 CONTINUED: 66A. (CONTINUED) . CUTTING IT OFF. SENDING A GUSHER OF BLOOD OUT OF HIS STUMP.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Wednesday HACKS AT PUGSLEY'S LEFT ARM. 93 In a final vengeful moment. LANDING IN JUDGE WOMACK'S LAP. THE ARM DROPS TO THE STAGE AND BOUNCES OFF.
Bravo! THE LIGHTS ON STAGE COME UP -GOMEZ 67.LATER THAT NIGHT Fester is tucking Wednesday into bed. (CONTINUED) . Then. devoted friends. someday will you take me there? FESTER It's a promise. Goodnight. jaws agape. and an airplane full of tourists from Miami Beach. Wednesday. applauding wildly.. You were terrific. CUT TO: 94 and A95 B95 OMITTED 94 and A95 B95 INT. accepting their family's applause. Fester applauds louder than anybody.. deep in shock. 93 An oil and Pugsley and Wednesday bow deeply. painting. Wednesday falls dead. THE ADDAMS FAMILY -leaps as one to their feet. WEDNESDAY (gurgles) Sweet oblivion. open your arms. All lost in the triangle. WEDNESDAY (thrilled) Uncle Fester.. They are now FESTER .. THE AUDIENCE -sits perfectly still. WEDNESDAY'S BEDROOM .11/28/90 93 CONTINUED: ONSTAGE -Wednesday clutches her bleeding throat.there were sailors and pirates.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .
Your moustache. I couldn't stop staring. MORTICIA Your cousin.. rotting together.pale. Wednesday holds out the doll's severed head. six feet under. MORTICIA (nostalgically sitting beside Gomez) An open grave.. CUT TO: C95 INT. GOMEZ A Shakespearean delight! A Gomez sits on a C95 All hail Fester! MORTICIA It's like a dream. Side by side. CEMETERY . Your laugh. It was my first funeral.. Your eyes. GOMEZ (aglow with romance) You bewitched me. Fester kisses it. Our lifeless bodies.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . and mysterious. theatrical triumph. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ . MORTICIA What a sublime evening. You were still a suspect.. In matching coffins.. Fester kisses the doll's empty neck. GOMEZ You were so beautiful . She holds out her headless doll. years ago. When we first met. I proposed that very night. all during the eulogy. A girl. it was an evening much like this. Balthazar. MORTICIA (gazing at the cemetery) Just think . for all eternity.. Magic in the air..someday we'll be buried here. No one even looked at the corpse.3/18/91 B95 CONTINUED: 67A. B95 He kisses her on her forehead.SAME TIME Morticia is standing in the moonlight.. A boy. bench nearby.
C95 They embrace in the moonlight. Lurch growls.tightly wrapped in a plant cocoon.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . he comes upon 95 ABIGAIL -.2/7/91 C95 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (aroused by all this) Cara mia! MORTICIA (passionately) Mon sauvage! 67B. CUT TO: . As they do. CONSERVATORY .MORNING LURCH -is sweeping up. Among the plants. the camera PANS above their heads: we see the headstone featuring UNCLE FESTER. CUT TO: 95 INT.
teases it with her fork.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ The displacement is over! (CONTINUED) What MORTICIA She . Granny SCREAMS. GRANNY (referring to the skeleton) That's for company! GOMEZ (shaking his head. amused) Rascals. proud. GRANNY Who put this in here? Pugsley and Fester exchange a conspiratorial glance and giggle. Wednesday. I was so 68. peeling off bits of the vines that had encased her. A96 Fester is at MORTICIA Weren't we all. the table with the family. GOMEZ Doctor! You were so right! an evening! MORTICIA Fester fit right in.LATER The cheerful Addams breakfast is underway. KITCHEN . play with your food. Wednesday has SOMETHING MOVING in her cereal bowl. at the sideboard.1/18/90 A96 INT.a full bucket. Mama? Granny pulls a SKELETON OF A SHIN AND FOOT out of one of the serving dishes. PUGSLEY (to Fester) Did you like the blood? FESTER Perfect . Abigail enters.
I'm completely in control. isn't zat. Fester looks over at Gomez and Morticia. Greta.. breakfast.. ABIGAIL Vat a luffly gesture. ABIGAIL Jais. FESTER I'm fine. he does. A96 Amazed by the gesture. GOMEZ Well.11/14/90 A96 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (glaring at Fester) Vell.valk me out. We're a family again. (CONTINUED) 96 MORTICIA .. 69.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . we shall mark the occasion. anguish. ABIGAIL Fester . nice. ABIGAIL Please . GOMEZ We've invited the whole clan.. WEDNESDAY Does he really have to go. if he insists upon leaving. MORTICIA (gazing at her family) Bloodshed..A LITTLE LATER. Mother. Dr. FRONT WALK . CUT TO: 96 EXT.. Fester is escorting Abigail through the yard. Pinder-Schloss. Tish? MORTICIA (to Fester) We've planned a farewell party.Greta. And we owe it all to you...
11/28/90 96 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (grabbing him) They're not your family. I am. Really. 69A. I can give you that. 96 (CONTINUED) .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gordon. They're evil and corrupt and degraded. I do. FESTER I'm fine. They don't love you.
overwhelmed by the grandeur. The black marble floor glistens.. It's straight out of a ROCOCO palace. MORTICIA'S CONSERVATORY . MORTICIA We're opening the ballroom now.. Morticia. (CONTINUED) . FESTER A party. 96 97 98 Each carrying a lighted candelabra. A lofty unsupported dome ceiling is DECORATED with figures worthy of Dante. Together they push them open and STEP into the BALLROOM Moonlight streams in through the floor-to-ceiling windows. Pugsley.A SHORT TIME LATER ABIGAIL 70.. Like some primeval sea. Gomez unlatches them.EVENING. to dance. CUT TO: 98 INT. Even Gate is intimidated and swings open. ABIGAIL (bellowing) Open up. Granny.. The furniture and banquet tables are FUNEREALLY SHROUDED. oaken double doors. Fester hesitates. They begin Fester remains frozen in the center of the ballroom. and Wednesday stand in front of the tall. the shrouds undulate in the breeze admitted through the open doors. revealing the true enormity of the ballroom. As Gomez and Morticia waltz past.. Fester is cutting the blooms off Morticia's roses. Lurch. Fester.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . here. Gomez steps up to Morticia and embraces her. then follows Morticia. HALLWAY OUTSIDE BALLROOM .2/13/91 96 CONTINUED: We'll see. Gomez. for me.. elaborately carved. CUT TO: 97 INT... They reach Gate.
THE BALLROOM. BLACK. COUSIN LUMPY ADDAMS. hours.IT FILLS THE SCREEN. LOIS.how long has it been since we've waltzed? MORTICIA (ruefully) Oh...to Fester. third hand on the bass.11/20/90 98 CONTINUED: All for you! GOMEZ Tish . resplendent now in their party clothes.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . COUSIN OPHELIA ADDAMS who looks like a Tennessee Williams heroine who's just been fished out of the Mississippi. MORTICIA 71. Thing is a 99 Gomez and Morticia dance among the ADDAMS FAMILY RELATIVES -. DEXTER AND DONALD (they echo one another) I wonder-. the two-headed cousin in matching turtlenecks. an over-age Heidi. Gomez. with thick blonde braids. Gomez and Morticia. He's made many a killing on Wall Street. If a man could look like a toad and still be a man. With him is his child-sized wife. DIGIT ADDAMS.that portrait gallery of GROTESQUES come to life. and Gomez in black velvet lounging pajamas. A SMALL ORCHESTRA plays a FRACTURED WALTZ. Dexter and Donald dance Ophelia over to Gomez and Morticia. this is he. As she bends back. 98 He dips Morticia. (CONTINUED) . a teenage hunchback in a loud blazer. all four arms embrace his date. When the shroud comes down THE PARTY IS IN FULL SWING.what happened-. SLOSH ADDAMS.what happened-. CUT TO: 99 INT. Among them are: DEXTER AND DONALD ADDAMS. she reaches for one of the shrouds and WHIPS IT OFF -. Morticia in a formal version of her black sheath.to Fester-. smoking jacket and fez.I wonder-.
Her mind water-logged and bleary. he is considering various pieces of clothing. Where am I? CUT TO: A100 INT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . on hangers or placed on the bed. FESTER I know. Ophelia. 99 A100 Fester is in his robe. Ophelia addresses Morticia.you're not really an Addams. OPHELIA Where is Fester? MORTICIA Soon.4/03/91 99 CONTINUED: GOMEZ Still primping. Soon. may I remind you . her arms folded. CUT TO: . FESTER What would look best? A tuxedo? ABIGAIL A nice dark suit is perfectly acceptable. FESTER'S BEDROOM OPHELIA 72. I suppose.but the party's for me! (he holds an outfit up in front of the mirror) I love this. with a spacy Thorazine smile. or his underwear. I know . FESTER But the whole family's coming! I want to look terrific! ABIGAIL Gordon. Abigail stands nearby.
He SEES-MARGARET on the dance floor with Tully. He looks out. You're right. then excuses himself. COUSIN IT Ooot gibber bleep. ADDAMS MANSION 72A. driving up in his bubble-topped Itmobile. MORTICIA Far too long. slicking it back. He pauses for a moment. It runs a hand through his hair. ooot.4/03/91 100 EXT. CUT TO: 101 INT. GOMEZ Gomez and 101 Cousin It looks around.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . It. Cousin It is a hairball in a homburg. BALLROOM . to survey the house.A LITTLE LATER Lurch escorts COUSIN IT into the ballroom. his face lights up as he sees a new arrival. Morticia come over to greet him. ooot. ANGLE on COUSIN IT. he has obviously been summoned. 100 The front door opens. who gleeps and squeaks in a language the Addams have no trouble understanding. and Lurch appears. obviously checking out the women. He parks the car and flips open the top. old man! COUSIN IT Bleep gibber. (CONTINUED) .
. eager to cut in. FESTER'S BATHROOM . then slip away from the party . Mother? (CONTINUED) WEDNESDAY MORTICIA C102 . Abigail shaves the back of Fester's head with a straight razor.11/17/90 101 CONTINUED: MARGARET 73.. hat in hand.. her is Cousin It.SAME TIME Wednesday is dancing with Lumpy Addams.. He takes her in his arms and spins away with her. Wednesday? Yes... MARGARET The first time we've been dancing in ages. The room is filled with steam... ooot. 101 clings stiffly to Tully in the midst of all this Addams' weirdness. CUT TO: C102 INT. TULLY Don't threaten me. ooot. BALLROOM . She turns. There's a TAP on Margaret's shoulder. TULLY It's a formal occasion. CUT TO: A102 B102 OMITTED INT.. How? FESTER I'm the guest of honor. ABIGAIL You'll make your appearance.SAME TIME A102 B102 Before The pipes groan loudly as scalding water floods the sink.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Morticia approaches them.. MARGARET Don't let me out of your sight. and you take me here. COUSIN IT Oot. the teenage hunchback.
I hear ABIGAIL I hope so. Don't buckle. No one likes that. are people everywhere. (to Lumpy) Why.. INSIDE THE BATHROOM -Fester turns off the water. FESTER It's not going to be easy. it's unattractive. fine. you.. Okay. CUT TO: 102 INT. There ABIGAIL You can do it.. Mother? (CONTINUED) . I'm counting on you. Gordon. I understand. FESTER Yes. FESTER All right.1/7/91 C102 CONTINUED: MORTICIA Could you run upstairs and check on your uncle? (as Wednesday runs off) Thank you. The pipes make a final clang. then there's silence. But if I can't. All grown up.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. (screwing up his courage) Then that's it. if you just stop whining. Uncle Fester? WEDNESDAY 74. I will try and reach the vault tonight. C102 102 She hears the water running in Fester's bathroom. dear. Look at you. Mother.A MINUTE LATER The door opens and Wednesday peeks inside. FESTER'S ROOM . well. the sound of voices beneath it. Lumpy Addams.
hurt you. 102 Abigail and Fester wheel around on her. WEDNESDAY You are a fake! I knew it! 74A.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Get her! (CONTINUED) ABIGAIL . Ve von't He is genuinely Fester can't believe this is happening. torn and it shows. Wednesday! FESTER Abigail's facade disintegrates and she bellows. The straight razor catches the light and GLINTS MENACINGLY. ABIGAIL Come here. little vun.1/7/91 102 CONTINUED: Wednesday stands frozen in the doorway.
Twenty-five years later.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .12/29/90 102 CONTINUED: Abigail pushes him toward Wednesday -. Wednesday SLIDES OUT of her chute. pulling the door closed behind her. CUT TO: EXT. Fester KICKS the door open just in time to SEE: A104 INT.one marked Pugsley and one marked Wednesday. the twins from the home movies. C104 EXT. He pounds the floor in frustration. BALLROOM .who suddenly scared. a pair of SIAMESE TWINS. they still look quite beautiful and quite mad. ARE TWO SMALLER CHUTES -. 75. GRAVEYARD . 102 103 She slams her bedroom door behind her. She takes off toward the cemetery. in fact. I cannot see! GOMEZ I'm blinded by beauty! (CONTINUED) 104 105 106 C104 .SAME TIME into her own room.S. the door is seamless. HOUSE . She runs through FESTER'S ROOM and ACROSS 103 INT. and into the darkness of the night.SAME TIME A104 B104 B104 Next to the coal chute where Abigail was grabbed by the vines.SAME TIME Wednesday throws open a TRAPDOOR IN THE FLOOR and DISAPPEARS DOWN IT. HALL . shielding his eyes. WEDNESDAY'S ROOM . Galvanized into action by the hold his mother still has on him. into the ballroom. Fester tries to find it but.NIGHT Wednesday runs through the graveyard.) Flora and Fauna Amor! Gomez approaches. GOMEZ (O. takes off running.SAME TIME Lurch escorts FLORA AND FAUNA AMOR. 104 105 106 OMITTED OMITTED INT. He takes their wraps revealing that they are.
he was mine. FLORA .THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. the Amor twins... always was. FLORA . FLORA (flirting) Hello. . Gomez grabs Tully.. Fauna. MORTICIA Why.......... FAUNA . The Amor twins... Morticia! FLORA I hate you! I've FAUNA FLORA 76. how can I compete? You're twice the woman I am. Amuse them. you nabbed him.. GOMEZ Tully. FAUNA . FAUNA I saw him first.. Tully. who is striding by in search of Margaret... heard so much about you. at least with me.... FAUNA . MORTICIA Flora. you terrible flirt... 106 FAUNA . he was mine..... this darling man. They're waiting for Fester.11/20/90 106 CONTINUED: FLORA Gomez Addams.. Copycat! Tag-along! Morticia appears.. Gomez..
leading him onto the dance floor.. At that moment.. Now get to the party . Oh my God.. (using her accent) Ja? CUT TO: A108 OMITTED A108 A107 107 TULLY .or they'll suspect something. ABIGAIL Pull yourself together. CUT TO: A107 107 OMITTED INT.12/26/90 106 CONTINUED: (2) 77. I'll be down soon. FAUNA (to Tully) She's nothing.. FESTER I couldn't find her anywhere. FESTER'S BEDROOM . She'll turn up .SAME TIME Abigail is in the room alone.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .the little cockroach. MORTICIA (calling after them) Bon chance! The girls now have their four arms all over Tully. Fester comes climbing back through the open window..out the back. Let's just leave .. 106 FLORA (to Tully) Ignore her.
FAUNA Especially considering. Satisfied.. TULLY Especially considering what? FLORA It makes no difference now. GRANNY Hey . FLORA (rolls her eyes heavenward) Fauna. deliciously plump and has an apple in its mouth. MORTICIA Mama. FLORA You can't imagine how surprised we were when Gomez called and told us Fester was back.SAME TIME 78/79. and rolls the cart out. This one too has an apple in its mouth.SAME TIME Flora and Fauna. BALLROOM . TULLY Why wouldn't they be devoted? FAUNA Well.11/17/90 B108 INT. It is beautifully glazed. B108 Morticia watches as Granny garnishes a ROAST PIG set on silver tray. Granny turns the roast pig slightly to arrange the garnish and reveals its SECOND HEAD. now that Fester's back..it's a party.. Lurch then lifts the tray onto a serving cart.. KITCHEN . you've outdone yourself.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . isn't he? (CONTINUED) C108 . chatter giddily as he tries to maneuver them through a box-step. CUT TO: C108 INT. It's obvious that Fester and Gomez are devoted. she covers it with a lid... now on the dance floor with Tully. he's the king of the castle again.
. The house. FAUNA Fester's still single. ladies? FLORA FAUNA TULLY 80. C108 Tully winks at Flora and blows a kiss to Fauna. isn't he? FLORA (flirting) Are you. the money . FLORA Gomez be damned.. Mr. Alford? Why.. Fauna.2/28/91 C108 CONTINUED: FLORA Fester's the older brother..you name it. grinning like the cat who swallowed the canary. I'm Fauna! I'm Flora! TULLY I'm flattered. Tully hurries off. they giggle madly. Excuse me.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . CUT TO: D108 E108 OMITTED OMITTED CUT TO: D108 E108 . FAUNA I'd like to. So he gets it all.
and our celebration begins. MORTICIA When he was lost. And how it became them. BALLROOM . 108 The music stops. our family grieved. MORTICIA Your attention please. (CONTINUED) . Our treasured guest of honor -Fester Addams. Now he is found.2/7/91 108 INT. Everyone.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .SAME TIME Morticia and Fester have appeared at the door to the ballroom. and the guests fall silent. 80A.
The other family members form a ring. Granny. It's an ELABORATE.. manages to somehow bungle his way through. Baffled. petrified.. and now.MUCH TO FESTER'S SHOCK AND SURPRISE. CAREFULLY CHOREOGRAPHED ROUTINE. 108 She takes him by the hand as if to lead him toward the assembled guests . Fester stumbles his way through. Fester Addams. Gomez admires his brother. Gomez has changed clothes -. sending him whirling like a top into the CENTER OF THE DANCE FLOOR where he suddenly STOPS. and begins juggling them. During an instrumental passage of the song. the eye of this dizzying hurricane. the Mamushka has been an Addams family tradition since God-knows-when. Fester. He carries FIVE GLEAMING SCIMITARS. high into the air. GOMEZ .THE ADDAMS FAMILY .We danced the Mamushka while Nero fiddled! We danced the Mamushka at Waterloo! We danced the Mamushka for Jack the Ripper. The MOVES GET MORE AND MORE INTRICATE..11/6/90 108 CONTINUED: 81. Morticia.but instead ABRUPTLY SPINS HIM BY THE ARM.he's dressed now like a Hollywood Cossack. They begin JUGGLING THEM BACK AND FORTH -. Fester stands in the center.. (CONTINUED) GOMEZ . Gomez then throws the scimitars straight up. The Mamushka! Gomez begins to CIRCLE around Fester. Gomez hurls the scimitars to Fester. GOMEZ Taught to us by our Cossack cousins. They launch into a TONGUE-TWISTING PATTER SONG. NOSE-TO-NOSE WITH GOMEZ. this Mamushka's for you! The juggling continues. CIRCLING COUNTERCLOCKWISE to Gomez. and all the Addams women rap out a stirring martial beat on tambourines.
108 GOMEZ After all this time Fester hasn't forgotten a step. Fester burps.with two in each hand. FESTER How did I do that? Gomez slaps him on the back. Fester has missed a beat and looks up to SEE -ALL FIVE SCIMITARS -DROPPING FAST. What's he going to do with THE FIFTH SCIMITAR? HE OPENS HIS MOUTH TO SCREAM..11/6/90 108 CONTINUED: (2) 82. not a word. TWO.. IT DROPS STRAIGHT IN. MARGARET We've been married for almost twenty years.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . hasn't forgotten a word! Fester STOPS DEAD. FOUR -. Fester drops the scimitars he holds and pulls the one from his mouth. ONE... The Addams CUT TO: A109 INT. cheer again. FESTER (astonished) Not a step. sometimes it seems like more. coming straight at him. Amazed. (CONTINUED) A109 . COUSIN IT Ooot oot blipper. HE The Addams mob CHEERS LUSTILY and launches into the finale of the song. Panicking.. A REMOTE CORNER OF THE BALLROOM ...SAME TIME Cousin It and Margaret are waltzing in an out-of-the-way nook.. he CATCHES. SWALLOWS IT TO THE HILT. THREE. They close in on Fester. his hands are full. they are somewhat involved.
leading a trembling Margaret.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. TULLY Hey . a reprise of the Mamushka has begun. Ten minutes . JUDGE WOMACK (smiling) What can I do for you? CUT TO: 110 . frustrated. Tully is heading for the front door. on the dance floor. Tully slips out the door.12/26/90 A109 CONTINUED: MARGARET Of course. CUT TO: 110 EXT. FRONT HALL . Abigail turns. In the rear of the hall. COUSIN IT Glibber gleep gleep. people change. Plan B. Cousin It passes across. TULLY (interrupts) I'm in charge..I'll be back. JUDGE WOMACK What the hell's going on over there? TULLY How would you like to be rid of the Addamses for good? I'm serious.not to worry. stops him. A109 109 Abigail ABIGAIL But that hideous little girl.A LITTLE LATER. He's apoplectic. ABIGAIL Where are you going? There's trouble.A SHORT WHILE LATER Judge Womack is on the front porch with Tully. Upstairs. people grow. in his coat. 83. throwing up her hands. CUT TO: 109 INT. JUDGE WOMACK'S HOME .. The raucous sounds of the Mamushka reverberate from the Addams mansion..
An AMBULANCE pulls up. Gomez and Morticia stand on the front steps waving good-bye to their departing guests. White-jacketed ATTENDANTS step out. sharing a romantic last moment with Margaret. with a straight-jacket built for two. (a beat) Call me? The limo drives off. they hang on him with all four arms. once I'm alone.. confidentially) I'll call. he's very special. MARGARET (torn) I can't. been such fun. Flora and Fauna giving good-bye kisses to Fester. He is enjoying himself. as Margaret waves a fond farewell. Fester? FAUNA (to Fester. Margaret.. won't you. She puts her arm around Margaret as It's MORTICIA Oh. 111 Cousin It leans out the window of his limousine. girls! CUT TO: MORTICIA .TWO O'CLOCK A. MARGARET You're a marvelous dancer. ADDAMS MANSION . The limo passes -Morticia appears. isn't he? MARGARET (sighing) He's perfect. We musn't. He's It. FESTER There's your ride! Good-bye.3/18/91 111 EXT. 84.M. COUSIN IT Ooot ooot gibber. covering him with lipstick.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . FLORA You'll come see me before you leave. It drives off.
UPSTAIRS HALLWAY . He grabs Abigail and starts dancing with her. FESTER'S ROOM .3/18/91 112 INT. still practicing bits of the Mamushka. He opens the door and strides into -113 INT. the Amor Twins' kisses still fresh on his cheeks. swinging her around and singing bits of the patter song.A BIT LATER A84A. (CONTINUED) . 112 Fester skips down the hall.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .SAME TIME 113 Fester dances into the room.
Sing.. I have! It was marvelous .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gordon. by all means . is that. Mother.. 113 Fester lets her go. ABIGAIL I'm perfectly fine..2/13/91 113 CONTINUED: Gordon? Fester keeps singing and dancing. sits on the bed. breathing fire. You only owe me your entire existence on this planet. I don't understand this. ABIGAIL Gordon. FESTER Don't say that! ABIGAIL I'm just your mother. Please..I sang up a storm! And I danced 'till I dropped! The Mamushka! He begins to dance again. Dance. Please. Mother? ABIGAIL Mother? Mother? Who is that? don't think I recall.. Abigail. turning away from him. Have you. Gordon. Don't concern yourself with me.go. have you been having a good time? FESTER (jubilant) Yes. Gordon! ABIGAIL Stop it! This instant! ABIGAIL 84A. Date. I'm dandy. return to your depraved orgy. Sometimes I think you're not even my son. Let me get this clear. lipstick? your face? All over FESTER (still giddy) From the twins! The beauteous Amor twins! ABIGAIL The twins? Gordon. (CONTINUED) FESTER I FESTER ..
.our little boy. It means nothing. 113 FESTER (coming to his senses) Mother.. She finds this enchanting. He looks just. Gomez enters.SAME TIME 114 Morticia is looking for her children. Make me believe it. Pugsley wakes up. Those Siamese twins.. Morticia shushes him. She discovers Pugsley ASLEEP. GOMEZ (whispering) All tuckered out. PUGSLEY (sleepy) Where.. MORTICIA (whispering) So sweet. he looks around. Gordon. platter. I'm so terribly sorry.. like a little entree. Cousin It . CUT TO: 114 INT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . ABIGAIL (very no-nonsense) We've got to find Tully.11/12/90 113 CONTINUED: (2) 85. curled up on the SILVER PLATTER WHERE THE TWO-HEADED PIG LAY. (he kneels at her side) It was just a party. I'm. ABIGAIL (clutching him savagely) Say it. It's over. I love you.. she points to the MORTICIA (whispering) Look . where's the party? (CONTINUED) .. FESTER And I want money. that hunchback.. BALLROOM .they're not you.
Gomez? GOMEZ Don't fret ..we'll find her. They look up at Fester. darling .check the bottomless pit. Lurch distributes torches. GOMEZ (calls out) Fester!! Up here.the shallow graves. then stands aside.) FESTER Somebody should stay behind . abandoned well! And FESTER (O.. looking down at them from Wednesday's window. Morticia wears a black cloak. MORTICIA (worried) Her favorite. ADDAMS YARD . GOMEZ Fester! You take the ravine! the unmarked. 114 115 Gomez rallies the family for the search.11/12/90 114 CONTINUED: MORTICIA It's over.LATER MORTICIA 86. and Lurch . Mama and Morticia .in case she comes back. I'll take the abyss. GOMEZ Fan out. Good man! GOMEZ Good thinking! (CONTINUED) . CUT TO: 115 EXT.S.head for the dung heap.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Granny has grabbed her divining rod.have you seen your sister? PUGSLEY Not since before the Mamushka. awaiting instructions. Pugsley . Pugsley helps Gomez unroll an ancient map of the area.
TULLY sitting in an armchair. 115 Gomez nods. 87. 116 INT. THEIR POV Spread far and wide over the grounds. ABIGAIL Where the hell is Tully? They head out.. 116 ABIGAIL Have you gone mad? Au contraire.A SHORT WHILE LATER Fester is still at the window. with Gomez in the lead. 117 118 Abigail joins him. basking in the rays of sunshine that beam from a copy of "The Sun Also Rises. tiny lights aloft.A LITTLE LATER Fester and Virginia find. CUT TO: TULLY . CUT TO: 117 118 OMITTED INT.lend a hand! Let's go! They all sweep off. Tully closes the book and smugly unfurls a LEGAL DOCUMENT. ABIGAIL What are you doing? Relaxing.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . the various members of the family search for Wednesday. DEN . TULLY Taking a little sun. GOMEZ That's the spirit." Tully smiles at them.12/3/90 115 CONTINUED: GRANNY Then who'll take the swamp? Thing tugs at the cuff of Gomez's pants.. WEDNESDAY'S ROOM . calling. Thing .
PRIMEVAL FOREST ADJACENT TO CEMETERY . 119 Thing hops lily pads. Two proud marble vultures guard the entryway.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .one of which belongs to Wednesday. Stalactites. SWAMP .MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 88. CUT TO: 122 EXT.MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 120 Torch aloft.MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT Morticia and Granny stand in the middle of the dripping dankness. He steps into A124 INT. CUT TO: 121 EXT. UNDERGROUND GROTTO . stopping occasionally to quest the air for his mistress. Relieved to find her. Gomez lowers the uplifted claw of one of the vultures and the stone doors slide open. CUT TO: 123 EXT. filled with the bleached bones of the Addams dead. Stalagmites.2/19/91 119 EXT. CUT TO: 120 EXT. Granny's torch casts scary shadows on the cave walls. Mama. curled asleep on a stone sarcophagus. GRANNY (calling out) Wednesday! Wednesday! MORTICIA Oh. Gomez approaches quietly. He doesn't want to wake her up.SAME TIME Inside it is catacomb-like. Gomez's torch casts shadows -. CUT TO: A124 . He lifts her tenderly in his arms. MAUSOLEUM . I was sure we'd find her here. CEMETERY .MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT Lurch picks up a car -. Pugsley searches through the primeval forest.DARK 123 122 121 Gomez reaches a stately mausoleum at the far end of the cemetery.looking for Wednesday. NEIGHBORHOOD .
this is lunacy! MORTICIA Fester adores Gomez! TULLY He's afraid of him. You've got about nine hundred and ninety-nine yards to go . waving his legal document. appalled at the sight of Gate. GATE . always will be! (CONTINUED) Lurch carries .from my own house!? TULLY Not your house.2/15/91 124 EXT.DARKNESS BEFORE DAWN 89. TULLY This is a restraining order. 124 Gate can't open. GOMEZ A restraining order? TULLY It requires you to keep a distance of one thousand yards from this house.Fester Addams! GOMEZ But . PULL BACK TO REVEAL -the family. the sleeping Wednesday and Pugsley. Seeing the twins brought it all back. moustache! Not any more! It belongs to the eldest living descendant. GOMEZ What's all this? TULLY -hurries down the walkway. the older of the brothers -.catch my drift? GOMEZ (in disbelief) I am restrained .always were. He rattles miserably on his hinges -locked tight with heavy chains and yellow police tape large "NO TRESPASSING!! COURT ORDER!! ADDAMS FAMILY KEEP OUT!!" signs are posted on Gate's rusty bars. Gomez .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez. (to Gomez) You're bitter rivals.
2/15/91 124 CONTINUED: GOMEZ It's not so! Those girls meant nothing .just leave. 124 (CONTINUED) . 89A.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . He's very hurt it's not a good time. Or better yet .no can do.he knows that! I demand to see Fester! TULLY Sorry . Leave it alone.
justic shall prevail.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Well. reads his decision. GOMEZ (to his family) Do not fear . PULL BACK to reveal -JUDGE WOMACK is the presiding judge. He hammers the bench again.U. with God as my witness I am that fool! CUT TO: 125 A126 126 OMITTED OMITTED INT. rubbing the sleep from her eyes. then (CONTINUED) 125 A126 126 .2/22/91 124 CONTINUED: 90. The courts will decide! (fervently) They say a man who represents himself has a fool for a client. WEDNESDAY But he isn't even Uncle Fester. GAVEL -hammers on the Judge's bench. COURTROOM .DAY C. Gomez and Morticia turn to look at her. 124 Wednesday comes forward.
FESTER standing at a second story window. CUT TO: 127 EXT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. GOMEZ 91. Wednesday one of her Marie Antoinette dolls. her carnivorous plant. his coat draped over his shoulders as if he were an invalid. watches the car drive off. his glove. 126 127 already sits in the passenger seat of the Duesenberg. dragging a toy wagon packed with his rings. CUT TO: 128 129 . his head thrown back. the attempts to impugn this man's character or question his identity have been woefully inadequate.LATER The Duesenberg eases out of the driveway and onto the street. (He holds up a golf ball) I believe this is yours. Morticia carries out Cleo. ADDAMS MANSION . CUT TO: 128 129 OMITTED EXT. sticking out of the trunk. Thing follows. Granny carries her favorite cauldron.2/26/91 126 CONTINUED: JUDGE WOMACK Given applicable standards of proof..DAY The family members TROOP to the car with their few possessions. Gomez Addams. WEIGHED DOWN by Lurch's tree. Lurch uproots his favorite tree and joins the procession. Pugsley his chemistry set. ADDAMS OVERGROWN DRIVEWAY . It is with no small amount of personal satisfaction that I declare Fester Addams legal executor of the Addams estate and rightful owner of all properties and possessions contained herein.
SAME TIME C. vibrant energy has him. DRESSING TABLE MIRROR Morticia leans into frame. worried look. n'est pas. The Addams' Duesenberg is parked in front of the furthest cabin. The asphalt has been ripped up in big chunks and Lurch's tree is parked next to the Addams' new home. With an icepick and a hammer. LOG CABINS OF SIMULATED WOOD surround the TEEPEE-SHAPED OFFICE. MORTICIA Just as long as we're together. He's a broken man. GOMEZ sits slumped in a hyde.11/28/90 130 EXT. we see the interior of the bungalow -. GOMEZ GRANNY CUT TO: 131 . I like it. mon cher? As she turns to Gomez.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . nibbling a wrapped bar of motel soap. 92.Bright and awful ersatz western.U. she deftly makes a large spidery CRACK in the round mirror. Sighing deeply. she stands back to admire her handiwork. PUGSLEY This place isn't so bad. It's as if been leeched from at her as if he's Huh? Wednesday tends to him. 131 INT.LATER. He looks back never heard French. (CONTINUED) She and her mother exchange a chair made from wagon wheel and naugaall of his insane.all ersatz cowboy and Indian mixed with chrome-plated plastic and orange shag carpet. MORTICIA That's the soap. Her mother pats her consolingly. dear. They even put candy in the bathroom. 130 A two-story NEON ARROW points the way to this bungalow court -. PUGSLEY comes from the bathroom. BUNGALOW . WAMPUM COURT . Granny joins her.
ADDAMS MANSION .U.. (CONTINUED) A133 132 132A .11/20/90 131 CONTINUED: Oh. 131 Wednesday exchanges a panic-stricken look with Morticia.MIDNIGHT THE COAL CHUTE ON THE SIDE OF THE HOUSE -drops open. as they reach up to pull three of the countless chains. WEDNESDAY (very worried) Father? PUGSLEY 93. The family moves closer to Gomez.all of them wet and bedraggled and gasping for air. GOMEZ But maybe I'll have one of those. ABIGAIL (to Fester) You're doing this on purpose.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez unwraps it CUT TO: 132 132A OMITTED INT. on three hands.. WEDNESDAY Do you want a cigar. Abigail. CUT TO: A133 EXT. and Tully . He takes a bar of soap from Pugsley. ADDAMS YARD . He takes another greedy bite. Father? GOMEZ (in a monotone) They're very bad for you. dumping out Fester. Wednesday pats her father's arm.MIDWAY TO THE VAULT C. and morosely eats.
and we will not submit. A bowl of MOTEL SOAPS is beside him. MORTICIA Yes! We will survive! Poison us. and his slow but determined companion? What does that story teach us. PUGSLEY During rush hour. Skin it. 133 WEDNESDAY Put the tortoise on the highway. A133 They all struggle to their feet and march grimly back toward the door. Thing MASSAGES his aching head. A damp cloth covers his eyes.the mattress pushed aside.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . In contrast. And why? GRANNY Because we like it! (CONTINUED) .MORNING Gomez is STRETCHED OUT on the naked box springs of his bed -. MORTICIA We are Addamses. strangle us.11/20/90 A133 CONTINUED: 94. CUT TO: 133 INT. She addresses the family from the head of the breakfast table. WAMPUM COURT BUNGALOW . Morticia squarely faces the crisis. the want ads open on the table before her. as Addamses? GRANNY Kill the hare. Boil it. yet lazy little cottontail. Who recalls the fable of the tortoise and the hare? The swift. break our bones we will come back for more.
CUT TO: 134 135 OMMITTED OMITTED 94A.soap bubbles floating from his mouth.. He burps -.11/12/90 133 CONTINUED: PUGSLEY Because we're Addamses! Gomez tries to rouse himself. 133 134 135 . GOMEZ (out of it) We're Addamses.THE ADDAMS FAMILY ..
Feeling the effects of the lemonade. Lurch downs it in a gulp and heads off. (CONTINUED) PERSONNEL OFFICER 137 138 . a relentlessly perky gal with a clipboard. with my children.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . one day each week I visit Death Row at our local prison. Lurch comes out of the motel courtyard.a tongue of flame shoots from his mouth and INCINERATES A WOODEN INDIAN advertising the Wampum Court. Carrying a SAMPLE VACUUM CLEANER and a bucket. SIDEWALK IN FRONT OF THE WAMPUM COURT .11/28/90 136 EXT. Have you been a volunteer. EMPLOYMENT AGENCY Morticia is being interviewed by a PERSONNEL OFFICER. PTA. Cars speed by. An array of POISONS are lined up on their rickety table. Lurch BURPS -. their contribution to the Addams' financial well-being. They've slashed their prices to a nickel per cup. service organizations? MORTICIA Well. PERSONNEL OFFICER We have so many homemakers re-entering the work force . 136 Wednesday and Pugsley have set up a LEMONADE STAND. PUGSLEY On the house. CUT TO: 137 138 OMITTED INT. Here.your domestic skills can be very valuable. The pitcher on the table before them steams. Major? MORTICIA Spells and Hexes.DAY 95. PERSONNEL OFFICER (knowingly) Liberal Arts. Pugsley offers him a cup of punch. Lurch. College? MORTICIA Private tutors.
4/03/91 138 CONTINUED: PERSONNEL OFFICER (perplexed) With your children? Autographs. PERSONNEL OFFICER Well. PERSONNEL OFFICER (with some bitterness) Of course not. What is he . But it's not his fault. We'll try again. CUT TO: FESTER 139 . the Riviera . Fester stares off into space. ABIGAIL The Mediterranean.once we find the money. trying to be festive) Ariba! Ariba! You choose.. we'll go everywhere. and begins rifling through her card file. he's going through a bad patch at the moment. MORTICIA 96. ABIGAIL Acapulco? Cancun? (she snaps her fingers in the air.DAY Abigail and Fester are seated at opposite ends of the couch.. Gordon . what about your husband? Is he currently employed? MORTICIA He's. castanetstyle.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . right after lunch. ADDAMS LIVING ROOM ... 138 The Personnel Officer shoots Morticia a doubtful glance. CUT TO: 139 INT.A loafer? A hopeless layabout? A shiftless dreamer? MORTICIA (wistfully) Not anymore. Abigail is going through a stack of colorful travel brochures.where should we go first? FESTER (sadly) I don't know.
GIRL SCOUT (with grave doubts) Is this made from real lemons? Yes.LATER THAT DAY A96A.4/03/91 A140 EXT. WAMPUM COURT . Are you sure they're real lemons? Yes. (CONTINUED) PUGSLEY WEDNESDAY . A140 Wednesday and Pugsley are at their lemonade stand. with no preservatives. GIRL SCOUT I only like all-natural foods and beverages. Organically grown. The girl scout carries several boxes of Girl Scout cookies.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . They are negotiating with a PRISSY LITTLE GIRL IN A GIRL SCOUT UNIFORM.
A moment passes.. CUT TO: 141 142 & 143 A144 B144 OMITTED OMITTED 141 142 & 143 A144 B144 140 OMITTED OMITTED . opens the door -. Geraniums in the flower boxes. jauntily waving a check. obviously in a hurry. turns to challenge the perpetrator of this atrocity and.DAY White clapboard. if delicious we have a GIRL SCOUT tell you what. SCREAMS again. I a cup. Lurch steps inside and shuts the door as best he can. like the salesman's manual undoubtedly advised. She SCREAMS in horror. AT THE DOOR. Do deal? 96A.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . The door swings open and Lurch exits. In a panic. I'll buy you buy a box of my girl scout cookies. the tools of his new trade. A140 WEDNESDAY Are they made from real girl scouts? CUT TO: 140 EXT. The door partially RIPS off its hinges. he STICKS his foot in the way.2/26/91 A140 CONTINUED: Well. onto her peach Oriental rug. Lurch carefully opens the little white gate. Surrounded by a white picket fence. she tries to slam the door on Lurch. but. SUBURBAN HOUSE . seeing Lurch.only to be greeted by a BUCKETFUL OF SLOP thrown past her. A BLONDE HOUSEWIFE in tennis whites. he rings the doorbell. Carrying his SAMPLE VACUUM CLEANER AND BUCKET. afraid he might break something..
THE ADDAMS FAMILY . defenseless witch into the oven instead. what do you think that feels like? After a beat. 144 Morticia is telling a story to a group of TODDLERS. CUT TO: . all the toddlers begin to CRY and WAIL. MORTICIA . and she was about to push them in. when. writhing in agony. with crayon drawings taped to the walls. Hansel pushed the poor... who have gathered in a circle around her. DAYCARE CENTER .DAY 97.2/22/91 144 INT. Now. The room is sunny and cheerful. boys and girls. sitting on carpet squares. And she told them to look in the oven. Where she was burned alive. and so the witch lured Hansel and Gretel into the candy house. by promising them more sweets. low and behold.
(CONTINUED) .. WAMPUM BUNGALOW . kitty." GOMEZ (shouts) Grandfather Addams! (smacks his forehead.11/20/90 145 thru 147 148 thru 152 A153 OMITTED 98. staring at the television. "Jeopardy" is on.DAY Granny holds a club behind her back as she stalks something. on the TV set . BUNGALOW .SAME TIME Granny.U. hosting his tabloid style show. ALEX TREBEK (reading from the card) Monsters Of History for $200. She stops at the sight of Gomez inside. "He was known as the Butcher of Bavaria. A154 C. 145 thru 147 148 thru 152 A153 OMITTED OMITTED EXT. GERALDO Voodoo zombies . club raised. He stares vacantly at a game show on TV. WAMPUN BUNGALOW . GRANNY Here kitty. or a living nightmare? Do zombies really exist? How are they made? Where can we find them? Call in with your comments. standing on the bed.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . kitty. Gomez is still stretched out on the naked box springs.SAME TIME Eating compulsively form a box of Mallomars. CUT TO: 153 INT. running now..the stuff of legend. hurries past the open window of the bungalow. hard) Damn! Not in the form of a question! CUT TO: 153 A154 EXT.Gomez is now watching Geraldo Rivera.
in his drone. Our dream come true. Quiet and cozy. for the phone. Let's take a call. ABIGAIL Just the two of us.U. And meanwhile. (CONTINUED) . We don't know where they meet.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GERALDO (cutting him off) Mr. we have this little nest.AN HOUR LATER C. 99. away from the world. FESTER (very flat) Yes. having lunch. Geraldo is talking to a woman in A155 GERALDO So your son was brainwashed by voodoo slave masters and forced to recruit others. Mother. ABIGAIL After lunch. Addams. CUT TO: FESTER FESTER 154 A155 INT. the studio audience. ADDAMS MANSION DINING ROOM . please stop calling. silently. on the TV screen.. Yes. Mother". ABIGAIL We'll find the money. A154 Gomez reaches CUT TO: 154 INT. BUNGALOW . Mother. Without that dreadful family. Yes.. GOMEZ (on the studio PA system) Geraldo. As Fester repeats "Yes. Mother. Abigail mimics him. It is very quiet. we'll try again.11/20/90 A154 CONTINUED: A CALL-IN NUMBER is flashed on the screen.DAY Abigail and Gordon are seated at opposite ends of the table.
boy. Wednesday and Lurch are seated nearby. boy. Gomez is now surrounded by junk food.) Here.11/20/90 A155 CONTINUED: 100. Gomez uses the remote to switch channels. MORTICIA I know . bags and styrofoam containers. as at a death watch. Ritually. GRANNY Dinner's going to be late. and Wednesday brings him a copy of TV Guide. let's go for a drive. Morticia brings Gomez the remote control for the TV. Pugsley. and a mountain of junk food wrappers. All he does is watch TV and eat. He switches off the set and stares at the blank screen. PUGSLEY I don't understand.S. "The Cosby Show" comes on. very worried about Gomez.Gomez. seated on the edge of the box spring. GRANNY (O. Pugsley brings Gomez a bag of "Doritos". Morticia. Gomez lets the phone drop. We hear her whistling. Here. A155 PULL BACK to the motel room. as handmaidens. The whole family. Re-run. She slams the door. GOMEZ (not even turning) A drive? And miss "Matlock"? Granny opens the door and sticks her head in.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . and Lurch brings him a canister of "Pringles". tries to comfort him. CUT TO: GOMEZ An episode of .
LATER Morticia is putting Wednesday to bed. I did. And sometimes they just haven't found their special place in life. WEDNESDAY If that man isn't Uncle Fester. mother? MORTICIA I don't know. And sometimes they're dogs from hell and must be destroyed. darling. WAMPUM COURT . CUT TO: . then who is he. Sometimes people have had terrible childhoods. I wish 100A. Morticia kisses Wednesday and she closes her eyes to go to sleep.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . A155A* WEDNESDAY Why is that lady doing all this? MORTICIA It's hard to say.2/7/91 A155A INT.
Morticia stares down at Gomez . She sits up in bed beside Gomez. She looks around at her family. depressed. and turns) You know. She strokes his hair lovingly. B155 The family sleeps . for certain. Don't you. and Thing uses Pugsley. Gordon? Fester mumbles something. Full of resolve.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Lurch is flat out on the floor. Tomorrow. ABIGAIL I know why you've been so glum. It's because it's taking us a little longer than we'd hoped to find the gold. She goes to the door. (CONTINUED) AC155* . Wednesday sleeps in the same bed as Granny. my darling.all but Morticia. don't you worry . mother. Abigail sits on the bed beside him. under his breath.4/03/91 B155 INT. some people might think it's strange. Pugsley uses him for a mattress. CUT TO: AC155 INT.NIGHT Fester is lying in bed. FESTER'S BEDROOM . ABIGAIL (very stern) What? FESTER (dutifully) Yes. and stands. the covers around his chin. Well.MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 101. WAMPUM . (she kisses him on the forehead. Isn't that right? Fester turns away. she gets out of bed.for a long beat.we're right on the verge. Lurch groans the exhale part. It's beautiful. ABIGAIL Of course it is. and Thing punctuates by wiggling. for a mother and son to be so close. I think it's beautiful. Pugsley snores the inhale part of a snore. tucking him in.
. fully dressed.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . CUT TO: D155 EXT.4/03/91 AC155 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL (instantly very sweet. He smiles maliciously at the sight of Morticia on the stoop. heads off down the walk. also attempting to block her way. Tully steps aside. CUT TO: E155 EXT.I'm weeping. AC155 Abigail exits. Thing clutching the bars. MORTICIA I would like to speak with Fester. GATE . and begins to climb out.LATER Morticia.. Morticia crosses the threshold. just outside Gate. BUNGALOW . struggles to get it open. Thing trails after. The minute the door shuts.A LITTLE LATER Morticia. dabbing her eye with a fingertip) Look . CUT TO: C155 EXT. Fester gets out of bed. MORTICIA Stop it. ADDAMS MANSION .A LITTLE LATER Tully opens the front door. He goes to the window. CUT TO: F155 OMITTED F155 E155 D155 C155 . wearing her cloak. 102. TULLY We've been expecting you. Morticia breaks free of Thing. you two. He is fully clothed. Unseen by her.
Addams . FESTER But. He waves to no avail.A LITTLE LATER 156 Morticia is now stretched out on the torture RACK. inhuman depravity sometimes it's just not enough. INTERSECTION AT THE FOOT OF THE ADDAMS HILL . under Abigail's supervision. in a kamikaze leap. Persecution. to Abigail) Despite everything. (a beat) We could have been such friends. The vault. graciously) You are a desperate woman. he GRABS ahold of the bumper of the next car that comes along and hangs on for dear life as the car SPEEDS down the street.. MORTICIA (to Abigail. Mother. ABIGAIL I don't think so. upset. I pity you. sticking out his thumb. Fester seems torn..THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Fester and Tully are securing her hands and feet. consumed by greed and infinite bitterness. DANCES AROUND in frustration. ABIGAIL Stop stalling! FESTER I'm not stalling! Stop badgering me! ABIGAIL (pushing Fester aside) Tully. ABIGAIL Gordon . I don't hate you.2/19/91 155 103. EXT.NIGHT 155 Thing does his damnedest to flag down any of the few oncoming cars. A passing car splashes him with mud. fiendish torture. agitated. Mrs. STUDY . Screwing up his courage.let's get started. then tries HITCHHIKING. take over! Tighten it! (CONTINUED) .any thoughts? MORTICIA (sweetly. CUT TO: 156 INT.
even more orgasmically. MORTICIA (to Tully. rather sensually. 156 TULLY I'd love to. flirtatiously) You've done this before. More BONE-POPPING NOISES. Morticia's bones make a horrible POPPING. BONE-POPPING NOISES. politely) Where's your bathroom? NOW! Tully shuts his eyes and tightens the rack. She sighs. you know that. STRETCHING SOUND. Morticia MOANS.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . She glances at Tully. CUT TO: ABIGAIL ABIGAIL ABIGAIL . It's just me. She MOANS. ABIGAIL (shoving Tully toward the rack) Do it! TULLY (to Morticia.2/19/91 156 CONTINUED: (2) 103A. very voluptuously. She opens her eyes. When I torture people. but I've got this stomach thing. Tighter! Tully tightens the rack a third time. Morticia MOANS again. Again! Tully tightens the rack again. in afterglow.
158 EXT. After a beat: Who is it? Thursday. GOMEZ (O.NIGHT 104. (CONTINUED) 159 158 . 157 A hand possessed. the rest of the family sleeps. then stops dead to knock on the cabin door. In the background.S.) We're paid through Thing rushes in. frantically signing. CUT TO: 159 INT. He opens the door.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .MINUTES LATER Thing skitters on the kitchen counter. Thing RACES up the driveway.NIGHT Thing leaps dramatically onto the porch.2/19/91 157 EXT. raising dust as he goes. WAMPUM COURT . BUNGALOW . BUNGALOW .
Which is the real you .. Thing! It's terrible when you stutter! 105. not enough. (CONTINUED) 160 161 .the loathsome.2/26/91 159 CONTINUED: GOMEZ (whispers) Slow down.. and heads off.. Deadbeat. please. stop! Thing flops down in exhausted triumph. 159 Frustrated. How Gomez adored you. GOMEZ Morticia in danger.or whomever you are.. TULLY Well. Send Gomez grabs him CUT TO: 160 161 OMITTED INT. GOMEZ'S STUDY .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Tully and Abigail are tending the stick BRANDING IRONS stuck in the roaring fire. under-handed monster you've become? Or the loathsome. Thing grabs a SPOON and begins tapping out MORSE CODE.. underhanded monster we came to love? FESTER (desperately) Don't ask me. stop! help at once .. FESTER Morticia. Parasite.. with understanding) Tully Alford . FESTER (to Abigail) You can't! Not with red-hot pokers! TULLY (queasy) Is this gonna smell? MORTICIA (graciously..A FEW MINUTES LATER Morticia is now lashed to an ENORMOUS TORTURE WHEEL. MORTICIA Dear Fester .charlatan.
be my guest.. Addams are so very close.4/03/91 161 CONTINUED: MORTICIA Fester .. ABIGAIL Gordon. Tell me what you think.. CUT TO: .I saw you tonight.. ABIGAIL .. 105A. 161 Abigail takes a red-hot POKER out of the fire and hands it to Fester.. ABIGAIL (furious) Gordon? FESTER (very upset) I was. at my window. restless! I couldn't sleep.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . top of my head. I have a thought. Just a notion. Since you and Mrs. I know it was you.
The car glides silently through Gate -. DUESENBERG . Gomez sees the reflections of the roaring fire through the study window.SAME TIME As Fester takes the poker and approaches Morticia GOMEZ CRASHES THROUGH THE WINDOW. CUT TO: 165 INT. in a back-flip. Thing skulks after him.NIGHT Gomez cuts the engine. Gomez stops the car and skulks out. STUDY . (CONTINUED) 165 . 162 thru 164 A165 INT. Thing JUDO-FLIPS in after Gomez.who opens uncharacteristically without a creak.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .11/17/90 162 thru 164 A165 OMITTED 106.
THE ADDAMS FAMILY . finally landing on his knees. Gomez! just doubloons! Tully feints. old man. Gomez parries Tully's blow from behind.HIS BLADE FLASHING LIKE LIGHTNING.....shredding the front of Gomez's jacket.. GOMEZ Dirty pool. MORTICIA Darling. 165 Tully also grabs a saber. ABIGAIL MORTICIA GOMEZ 107.S. and.) . it's Tully. I'm your lawyer. I'm on retainer. then slashes . GOMEZ One for you.. and approaches Gomez from behind.. take care! Without even looking. TULLY Gomez. Gomez ATTACKS . GOMEZ . Tully's sword is knocked from his hand and he's sent tumbling backwards. one for me! Tully looks up at Gomez with cowardly. Let him up! Gomez turns to see. Then he whirls on Tully. (CONTINUED) ABIGAIL (O. Never again! Not TULLY This is for keeps.. pleading eyes. Tully.2/15/91 165 CONTINUED: Cara mia! Mon cher! Addams! Thing tosses Gomez a saber off the study wall. In a blur of action.
12/3/90 165 CONTINUED: ABIGAIL who now has a pistol aimed at Morticia.. feet. (the pistol aimed at Morticia. GOMEZ Tish . Our wheel. GOMEZ (touching the torture wheel) This wheel of pain. (2) 108. GOMEZ (to Morticia) To live without you . and using her accent) I displace her. Morticia will die horribly. 165 One shot and Tully scrambles to his ABIGAIL (to Gomez) That's right! Now get moving Addams. As does mine. Gomez throws aside his sword.. And if you're not back in one hour.. CU on Fester.seeing you like this. confused at watching this emotional display. (CONTINUED) MORTICIA MORTICIA My . Gomez is near enough now to take Morticia's hand.. take him to the vault. on the torture wheel. blood boils.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .only that would be torture.
" Seeing the title of the book.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .. Tully suddenly panics: (CONTINUED) FESTER .I should've left you where I found you! At Abigail's final words. GOMEZ (murmuring) Good show. Allow me. Addams - FESTER But. Gomez! That's the wrong book! CLOSE UP Gomez's hand is on the right book. Gomez reaches for the book that will open the secret panel: ABIGAIL Can it.you're nothing but a useless..only that would be death.. FESTER No tricks. Fester reaches for a DIFFERENT BOOK -. "Greed.." but Fester stops him from pulling it. Gomez looks into Fester's eyes -. Gomez kisses Morticia's hand. 165 MORTICIA (to Gomez) A day alone ..realizing what he's about to do.. Knock it off! right now! ABIGAIL The vault."Hurricane Irene: Nightmare from Above. old man. Mother can't we. Gordon! Stop dragging your feet! You disgust me .2/15/91 165 CONTINUED: (3) 109. Fester suddenly LEAPS FORWARD. snivelling baby! A stone around my neck! What was I thinking .
red-hot pokers. really? TULLY I'm your friend. Gordon listen to mother! FESTER I'll never listen to you . Gordon . my love .not ever again! ABIGAIL I had to be strict with you because I cared! Put it down! FESTER You never really loved me! ANGLE on Gomez and Morticia. ABIGAIL Keep the book closed. GOMEZ Leather straps..to safety! MORTICIA But what of Fester? (CONTINUED) . my darling! He helps her down from the wheel.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . nearing the bookcase. Gordon! You don't know what it can do! It's not just literture! FESTER (advancing on Tully) Oh.. facing off with Abigail. MORTICIA Later.think of the doubloons! FESTER They're not yours. GOMEZ Come. 165 TULLY Put that book down. as Tully cowers. MORTICIA Quickly. releasing Morticia from the torture wheel. ANGLE on Fester. my dearest.3/18/91 165 CONTINUED: (4) 110. Tully! Back off! ANGLE on Gomez.
Fester desperately tries to close the book to quell the storm. struggling across the floor toward the bookshelf. Fester opens the book. which pelts him with papers and other flying debris. to Fester) Old man. across the room. He falls to the floor. Gomez can no longer fight the storm.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ (calling out to Fester) Old man! This way! ANGLE ON THING. fighting the gale force winds. ANGLE ON GOMEZ.2/28/91 165 CONTINUED: (5) 110A. ABIGAIL Stop whining. to open the bookshelf. then FADE TO BLACK FADE IN ON: 166 thru 169 170 171 thru 173 OMITTED 166 thru 169 170 171 thru 173 OMITTED OMITTED . MOVE IN on the storm raging within the pages of the book. Thing fights the wind. and blasts Tully out of the window. and the bookshelf slams shut. who has now pulled the right book. he is leading Morticia behind the bookshelf. He tries to hold the bookshelf open for Fester to follow. with electricity coursing through him. but a HUGE BOLT OF LIGHTNING ZAPS HIM. Amid the storm. "Greed". this way! ANGLE on Abigail and Fester. Then he blasts Abigail out as well. 165 GOMEZ (calling out. you little goodfor-nothing! Be a man! FESTER You're a terrible mother! I said it! There.
. There is a hand-lettered sign on the door reading "HALLOWEEN OPEN HOUSE... a skeleton.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . As the door opens. They giggle and chatter. back toward the street. NEXT OCTOBER . After a beat.2/28/91 174 EXT. and they all carry trick-or-treat bags.there's a witch. CUT TO: CHILDREN .NIGHT 110B. We do not see who has opened the door. ADDAMS MANSION." The children are dressed in traditional Halloween costumes . the children CHANT: Trick or. a ghost. One of the children is pushed forward. but the children do. 174 A group of little CHILDREN approach the front door. they SCREAM IN HORROR and run. and he KNOCKS on the front door. etc. terrified. They freeze in mid-chant.
GRANNY Well. There are clusters of black and orange balloons. 111.) . Wednesday is dressed in her usual style.S. but Pugsley is dressed as a tiny version of UNCLE FESTER. with a pitchfork through its throat. FRONT HALL . Gomez hangs upside down from the balcony. Skeletons. and the letters drip with blood. Skulls. Thing shakes in fear. I even made finger sandwiches. each wearing a top hat. COMPLETE WITH BALD HEAD AND GREATCOAT. FESTER (petting Thing) Oh. old man! MORTICIA (delighted) Look at you.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Gomez flips down onto his feet. it's their loss. All the decorations are elegant yet ancient. covered with cobwebs. Morticia hands Granny appears from the kitchen.12/3/90 175 INT. looking puzzled. A stuffed. PUGSLEY (to Uncle Fester) How do you like it? Fester is very touched. dusty and faded. Here we come! Wednesday and Pugsley come down the stairs. hang from the sconces by the nooses around their necks.SAME TIME Lurch is closing the front door. Perched on Fester's shoulder. calm down. he picks Pugsley up. are scattered about. GOMEZ Pugsley. carrying a tray of food. each holding a candle. A banner on the wall reads "HAPPY HALLOWEEN". The adults are delighted. him a decoration. Uncle Fester and Thing are draping the banisters and stairway railings with a garland made from crepe paper. life-size scarecrow leans against the stairway. The crystal gloves in the chandeliers have been replaced by miniature jack olanterns. 175 The family is busily decorating the house for their annual Halloween festivities. on the stairs and the furniture. dead branches and spanish moss. (CONTINUED) PUGSLEY (O.
in the den. Lurch? 111A.2/15/91 175 CONTINUED: FESTER What can I say? He's going to break hearts.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . GOMEZ Let's get a picture! MORTICIA Oh yes . 175 (CONTINUED) .
They look just like everyone else. DINING ROOM .I almost didn't recognize you. GOMEZ Look. he is painting Fester and Pugsley's portrait. Lurch opens the door. obviously very much in love. Lurch has set up an easel and canvas. MARGARET (to Wednesday) And what are you.11/20/90 175 CONTINUED: 112. everyone! We have guests! MORTICIA Hello. holding hands. Cousin It . Margaret is radiant. a bandanna and a holster. I'm a homicidal maniac. (CONTINUED) 176 .THE ADDAMS FAMILY . Cousin It wears a cowboy hat. MARGARET Isn't he handsome? Everyone keeps asking where he bought his costume. Margaret and Cousin It sit together. GOMEZ (admiringly) It is a wonderful hat. Margaret is dressed as a fairy princess. complete with wand. darling? your costume? Where's WEDNESDAY (solemnly) This is my costume. carving a pumpkin.A FEW MINUTES LATER Fester and Pugsley are posed at one end of the room. CUT TO: 176 INT. Morticia is knitting. MARGARET Trick or treat! COUSIN IT Ooot oot glibber. Granny brings people cups of steaming punch. Standing outside are Margaret and Cousin It. from a punch bowl. Gomez and Wednesday are sitting on the floor amid newspapers. Everyone turns. Margaret. 175 Everyone starts to move toward the den. There is a KNOCK on the door.
sadly) But not enough. Ooot oot oot. 176 She just MARGARET I'm sorry. WEDNESDAY From the Bermuda Triangle. and I'm not bitter.my real family. FESTER I'm so glad I can share this night with my family . Ghosts and goblins. I'm blushing.2/19/91 176 CONTINUED: FESTER Halloween .she really did find him tangled in a tuna net. but I blame Tully. MORTICIA Stranger things have COUSIN IT 113. How true. Witches on broomsticks. twenty-five years ago. PUGSLEY (to Fester) She wasn't your mother.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . COUSIN IT Ooot oot gleep. Now that I've got my memory back. With amnesia. WEDNESDAY Children begging in the streets. Filled with evil. (shaking her head. stop. MORTICIA That unfortunate woman. MARGARET (the coquette) Oh. old sport . said that. happened. (CONTINUED) . COUSIN IT Ooot blipper gleep.it's such a special time. GOMEZ (to It) You remember.
2/19/91 176 CONTINUED: GRANNY (to Fester) Thank God for that lightning.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . 176 (CONTINUED) . 113A. Knocked some sense into you. PUGSLEY Please. Uncle Fester? GOMEZ (jovially) Pugsley...
Everyone oohs and ahhs." FESTER (delighted. He places it on a table. And blood is thicker than water. MORTICIA And just as refreshing. and lights the candle inside. MORTICIA Of course . FESTER You know. It has ONE EYE IN THE MIDDLE OF ITS FOREHEAD.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . everybody . to Gomez remembering this childhood favorite) "Wake The Dead"! GOMEZ (equally excited) "Wake The Dead"! Out to the cemetery! Come on. chattering happily. Gomez stands up.2/19/91 176 CONTINUED: (2) 114. MARGARET (to Granny) I've never played this before how does it go? GRANNY Did you bring a shovel? (CONTINUED) MARGARET . everyone! Everyone starts to exit. all the old sayings are true.time for a game! What shall it be . Pugsley giggles. having finished the pumpkin. It lights. 176 PUGSLEY For the picture? Fester pops a light bulb into his mouth."Wake The Dead. GOMEZ All right.bobbing for apples? Charades? COUSIN IT Ooot glibber glip. There's no place like home. The pumpkin glows.
Fester rises.THE ADDAMS FAMILY . The camera pans up the case. handshake.3/18/91 176 CONTINUED: (3) 114A. It contains ABIGAIL AND TULLY. FESTER (joyfully. Three skulls and a pelvis . CUT TO: . Fester runs out.we'll give you a head start. FESTER Let us always be as one. Fester flips Gomez in a JUDO FLIP. in a manly GOMEZ Let us never be parted. Gomez offers his hand. Fester takes it. mine! FESTER (to Wednesday) I tell you what . old man. will you be on my team? No. Fester faces WEDNESDAY FESTER My own dear brother . dusting himself off. MORTICIA (touched by the brothers devotion) And just as refreshing.who could be more precious? GOMEZ Blood is thicker than water. to Gomez and Morticia) Come on! MORTICIA We'll catch up.how's that? Pugsley and Wednesday cheer and run out. 176 PUGSLEY Uncle Fester. Gomez. EXPERTLY MOUNTED AND STUFFED. Gomez LANDS At the foot of a glass display case.
like fireflies. is it true? MORTICIA (shaking her head "yes") Oui. they are moving toward the front door. Wispy GHOSTS flit through the night sky. mon cher... They embrace. What more could we ask? Gomez? Morticia holds up the garment she's been knitting .what a night. FRONT HALL 115-117. what are they? GOMEZ Oh. MORTICIA (deeply satisfied) Our family.. In the distance. Morticia and Gomez have drifted into the front hall.SAME TIME 179 MORTICIA Morticia and Gomez are silhouetted in the doorway. a wolf HOWLS. of its own accord. Tish . ADDAMS MANSION . CUT TO: 179 EXT. GOMEZ (ecstatic) Cara mia.it's a BABY JUMPER WITH THREE LEGS. THE END . In the cemetery...3/18/91 177 178 OMITTED INT. torches are seen. A human SCREAM is heard. Everyone -. as the front door SWINGS OPEN. followed by Granny's CACKLE. 177 178 Everyone is gone.. FADE OUT.THE ADDAMS FAMILY .together at last. There is a FULL MOON.
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