Existance Dank's Point Of View

By Abbi Glines

especially a female one. I didn’t like it that her scowl deepened. Scene at the Lockers The only explanation was the kid must be an idiot. I spoke up. Granted most people weren’t crazy about me but I wanted Pagan to like me. It’ll drive him crazy.. you are. Games were fun to play and it'd been much too long since I’d come across a worthy opponent. Admitting that simple fact was humbling and it bugged the hell out of me. She stopped in front of her locker still ignoring me even though I made sure she could see me. The fact she halted in her steps the moment her eyes met mine. When Pagan wasn’t looking his way he pathetically ogled her. The monotony of my existence didn't hold much promise of entertainment. I knew it. I could force her to acknowledge me by becoming visible to everyone else but I wasn’t in the mood to do so just yet. I couldn’t place it exactly because it was a new emotion.The Beginning The moment she spotted me. The determination in her eyes intrigued me. If it wasn’t for the incredibly odd possessive streak I felt toward the girl. Students walked past me all morning without seeing me but this one saw me. I’d play her games for awhile.” . I stood up from the wooden picnic table. I couldn’t stand by and watch her so unhappy. Not anything I was familiar with. I’d make him see the error of his ways. Watching the disappointed little frown on her mouth made something inside me stir.” she responded through clenched teeth and opened her locker. I sure as hell wasn’t going to help him out. Kind of proves what a child he is. gave her away. Pagan tugged her book bag up higher on her shoulder as she pushed through the bodies of students filling the halls. where I'd been sitting awaiting her arrival. he acted as if he hadn’t just two seconds ago been panting after her like a damn dog. Granted. If there hadn’t been a parking lot full of witnesses. but I can see it’s bothering you. I didn’t like the fact she wanted his attention.” “I’m not bothered. then quickly darted past me as she hurried into the school.. “Yes. “He’s trying to play hard to get. she did a really good job of pretending she couldn't see me. I have the feeling she would have yelled at me instead of cowering like most humans. There is this little wrinkle between your eyebrows that appears and you nibble your bottom lip when something bothers you. “Don’t look at him next time.” Her eyes flicked a quick glance over at me but she didn’t miss a beat. Instead of staying in the background shadowing her like I’d been doing for weeks in order to ease the strange tightness in my chest only her absence could provoke. Then when she glanced over at him.

this felt wrong. Watching this was more than I could handle right now. If the football kid keeps making you frown I’m going to take matters into my own hands. Don’t let something that idiot did send you running. It reminded me of silk. Death Breaks the Rules This was it.” I’d barely glanced over at Miranda and Wyatt. The scowl was gone and an odd feeling of accomplishment washed over me. I’d been the one to cause that tiny smile forming on her lips.. Pagan. For the first time in my existence. I’m angry and I just want to leave. Maybe it would be easier than I thought to change the course of fate. The pull to take her soul. “Please.” Did I really just say that? I was going to have to watch my words. well. But damn that girl fascinated me.” .” Of course she did. Fate had played out just as planned and the idiot kid she was interested in would be the reason she left today. “There that’s better. I stood watching her talk to her silly friend. her eyes were scanning the hallway for the boy. “Don’t leave. But I knew making a joke about her friend’s constant grope session would make that tiny smile break out into a full fledge grin. I liked silk. Dammit! I had to do something. All I could see when Pagan was around was.” I heard the pleading in my voice as I fell into step beside her. I decided to wait outside. Instead. Pagan emerged from the building with tears glistening in her eyes. I had a fight on my hands and this was the last thing I needed to witness..That got her attention. Especially dark silk. Why did something so simple make me feel like a freaking king? “You’re missing the public display of affection across the hall between your two buddies. “I don’t want to stay. They may need you to throw a bucket of ice water on them. Go back inside. Forget the stupid kid and enjoy the rest of your day. Before she could respond. I’m positive my amusement at her frustration wouldn’t please her. I like it when you’re smiling. Change things somehow. That was the grand plan.. It wasn’t stronger than my need to keep her alive. He isn’t worth it. don’t get in your car.. The pull to be there. I had to stop her. Pagan wasn’t hearing a word her friend was saying. She froze and turned her head slowly to peek at me through her cascade of dark hair. This was becoming a freaking runaway train I couldn’t stop. She couldn’t see me any longer although I hadn’t moved. Pagan. I faded away. She turned to walk toward her next class and I was glad she couldn’t hear my laughter. I wasn’t about to answer to that minor slip of the tongue. As if right on cue. Her shoulders lifted and fell back down as she let out a loud frustrated sigh.

“Pagan please look at the road. I could keep her alive. She was young. It was an odd feeling. “THE ROAD. I’d only slowed it down. “Why do you care if I leave? Are you the new hall monitor and I missed the memo?” This was it. Nothing short of physically holding her here would keep her from getting in that blasted car and leaving. So instead. I was experiencing an emotion. “Do you have to question everything? Can’t you just listen for once?” Annoyance took the place of hurt in her eyes and her posture snapped to attention. It hit the front pushing the steering wheel towards her chest. I made sure of that. Nothing I’d done had changed anything. I was going to have to break the rules. She wasn’t going to stop. A strong one. If I was going to completely alter fate..” She spun around and headed to her car.She stopped walking and hope soared inside my chest. I was selfish.” I begged even though I knew she couldn’t hear me. “I’m leaving here. I didn’t want her body damaged. I wasn’t ready to let her go.. I sat anxiously watching her wondering at what moment the accident would happen. . The pull was still there. If you don’t have a good excuse then there is no reason for me to stay. I’d made sure of that. I at least needed to keep some things hidden from her. I watched as her car spun out of the parking lot before joining her in order to completely change her soul’s fate. “I’m begging you to go back in the school. How it would happen. This was it. I don’t have to listen to you. You can’t stop me. There was so much she hadn’t experienced yet. I’d tried. And. I grabbed the steering wheel and kept the car from rolling down the side of the embankment. an emotion.” “Why?” A growl of frustration erupted from my chest. Quickly.” I roared again wishing I could just make myself visible or at the least speak to her soul but I’d only make matters worse if I did. What the penalty was I wasn’t sure but I wouldn’t be able to continue on if I had to take Pagan’s soul. The stop sign loomed up ahead but Pagan was looking in her mirror. The truck’s horn blared and the impact wasn’t directly on Pagan’s side. I could change things. It was. She couldn’t see me sitting in the passenger’s seat beside her. I did the only thing I could do. I unbuckled her seatbelt and lifted her gently from the car. She was so stubborn... The large truck wasn’t slowing down either. Pagan’s life was still marked.

This was not how it was supposed to be. I didn’t like it. Needing to be near her. watching her closely as she sank back down onto the bed she’d jumped up from when I’d startled her. I was immune to the familiar bitter taste it left in my mouth. I wanted to rush her to the hospital myself keeping her safe in my arms. Feeling fear was a part of my life. talking to me and touching me freak me out a little. I wasn’t taking this soul today. That simple truth infuriated me. I didn’t stop when they began working over her body. I stood in her doorway watching as she nibbled on her bottom lip nervously. Damn I hated this. Things I couldn’t tell her. “Well excuse me if strange souls showing up in my house. She didn’t trust my promise to keep her safe. I’d already done too much. Her heart was beating. A panicked murmur escaped her lips and I bent down to sing in her ear. “Dank. I laid her gently on the ground and held her hand whispering promises I knew I could keep while I waited on the ambulance. “Sorry. I’d saved her from death. “What’s wrong?” I asked. I realized she’d been unable to breathe. But Pagan’s fear bothered me. Pagan was unaware I’d followed her home. But I couldn’t. I ask you about it and you curse into the darkness and get all angry. I didn’t stop when I heard the sirens. I needed to keep her safe. Her scream died almost instantly as her eyes focused on me.” I walked into the room. Knowledge was dangerous.” She shot me an accusatory look. Followed Her Home Fear hung heavy in the air. I sat down beside .” she gasped pressing her hand against her heart. My presence created fear.Gasping for air loudly as I held her. Fear shouldn’t be an emotion she had to deal with anymore. She wanted to know too much. It always came back to this.” Damn. I could hear it racing inside her chest from across the room. She didn’t move. “Then. I didn’t stop until they lifted her and placed her securely in the ambulance. Her eyes didn’t even flutter but she was breathing. I didn’t realize you were so wound up about this.

.” She sighed and sat up straighter. Interesting. and I’ll make sure it’s yours but that I cannot do. The smell of honey warmed me. “I have to protect you. But I couldn’t tell her any of that. who she is?” I shook my head turning my eyes away from her.. I was Death. “Not exactly. They wouldn’t just leave it alone. I could decide to allow life.” Relief came over her face then a small frown quickly replaced it. I’d cave.” She studied me for a moment as if remembering something that confused her. It was my choice. . If I let myself look into those pleading dark pools of hers. I wanted her to understand that she had nothing to fear. “If you want to take that shower. “I’m sorry about that. that’s the only thing I can’t do for you. I shouldn’t have scared you that way. Pagan. Her hair always smelled completely edible. “Why’re you here. “Until I know everything is fine. “Can you read my mind?” She didn’t want me reading her thoughts. can you tell me what is happening. Ask me anything else in the world.” “Well. then?” Because they were trying to fix what I’d done. I’ll be spending the nights here in your room.her on the small bed. “No. I made it my choice.” I paused then motioned toward the door. It’s more like I can feel your fears so strongly I can hear them.” I turned my eyes back to hers and held her gaze.until I take care of what must be done. I’ll make sure you’re completely safe while you do so.

I closed the distance between us.“You heard me in the cafeteria when you were with Kendra. Just this once I’d forget why touching Pagan was wrong. As my chest brushed against her back. I wasn’t scared then.” Ah. Pleasure coursed through me and I tightened my hold. I wouldn’t be able to stop myself now. I wasn’t sure I even knew how. I didn’t like to be the reason she was unhappy. The fear that I’d never be able to release her now I’d held her.” Her body trembled and my need to own her became unbearable. Couldn’t she see this was what was best for her? The frown on her face and range of emotions flashing in her eyes told me she didn’t believe me. seeped into my thoughts. I pressed her back firmly against my chest. The Bedroom Scene “I hate the color red almost as much as I hate blond hair. This was a form of control I’d never had to exercise. As much as I needed to put distance between us. “You weren’t?” I asked unable to keep the smirk off my face. Her face turned an adorable shade of red before she spun around and rushed out of the room. Knowing she cared about the blond flirting with me eased the ache in my chest caused from the sight of her snuggled up against Leif’s side. Wrapping my arms around her. Standing. “She means nothing to me. I couldn’t leave her like this. Closing my eyes I bit back a curse.” My need to reassure her was going to completely botch my plan to push her away. yes I felt her fear that day. her small body shivered. I’d reveled in that fear. . But watching her pout over my going to this stupid dance with Kendra was difficult.

She tilted her head back to stare up at me. . This was wrong. “Please.. You’re not meant for me. Pagan. I continued kissing the delicate skin along her face. I couldn't own her.” Without opening my eyes to see her one last time.” Instead of cowering away from me in fear. She was human. Pagan Moore. My hands found her hips and I worried the fierce grip I had on her might bruise her. I couldn’t witness the pleading etched on her face. I didn’t understand it at first. I vanished. Her neck exposed as her head fell back on my shoulder. From the moment I came for you I was drawn in. It’s your soul calling to me.” I whispered harshly. The safer she was. That skin would be warm and delicate. Agony ripped through me. So instead. Filing away the memory of how she felt wrapped up in my arms. I cradled her against me for only a moment. I can’t be tempted. “You make me crazy with need. But now I know. Pagan.” I trailed kisses up her neck as she shifted closer to me full of expectation. “I want to rip his arms from his body so he can’t touch you again. like a normal human would when Death was admitting to being obsessed with them. Pagan. I couldn’t continue to touch her.“I would never lie to you. “I can’t. Closing my eyes tightly I wanted to explain it all. The less she knew. I needed to leave her. Pagan leaned against me full of trust. But yours has become my obsession. It would destroy us both. They aren’t supposed to. I couldn’t claim her soul for myself. It heated under my touch. “I want to kill that boy every time I see his hands on you.” Unable to hold back the growl inside of me caused by the possessive emotion that only Pagan had ever managed bring out of Death. Wanting more than anything to change this. Inhaling the intoxicating aroma it presented. I was Death. But I couldn’t force myself to relax my demanding hold. I couldn’t have her. then I laid her on the bed and quickly stood up. I ran a hand along the exposed skin on her arm. Lowering my head I kissed the soft skin on the top of her ear. Souls mean nothing to me. But I couldn’t.” she whispered. Everything about you. This was only going to hurt her more in the end.” I needed to touch more of her. you tempt me. The smell of her skin was delicious. I told her the only thing I could. I lowered my head and kissed the gentle curve there. Picking her up. With want. Unlike anything I’d ever experienced. Enjoying the excitement of her racing pulse beneath my lips. Make her understand. “But I can’t have you. “You tempt me.” I whispered against her ear. I’m not made to be tempted but you..

“So. have you decided to try the ignoring me thing again. But the simple fact their fight was over me gave me some ridiculous amount of joy. touching her. Yet. The gulf breeze caused her hair to gently dance around her shoulders giving her an ethereal appearance.” I said softly hoping to defuse the real reason I was here. to see if I go away?” Biting her bottom lip. I needed to guard Pagan. “He’s looking rather forlorn sitting at a table all alone. The silly blond in my arms let out a trill of giggles unappealingly similar to the sound of fingernails on a chalkboard. He hadn’t meant to upset her. If I didn’t know better I’d swear she wasn’t real. here I stood forcing myself to tolerate the annoying girl draping her body against mine. I almost felt sympathy toward him. Being near her. Intelligent. she shook her head no. Her attempt at acting as if she wasn’t just as happy to have me alone as I was to have her all to myself was cute.” . I’d stayed because of Pagan. watching her. and compassionate.” I ordered before detaching myself from her claws. Her head snapped up and relief flickered in her eyes before she shrugged and turned her gaze from mine so she could stare at her feet. Glaring angrily toward the boy she’d left behind. “I know that doesn’t work with you.The Kiss She was defending me. “Go play with your friends for awhile Kendra. sadness. honest. What was she thinking? She didn’t need to be alone. No one had ever defended me. The door to the gym opened as Pagan shot one last look my way then disappeared outside. The confusion. She did’t need to know how desperately I needed to be near her. those were all the reasons I’d made this choice. This isn’t where I wanted to be. I couldn’t keep from letting the amused laughter escape me. anger were all rolling off her in waves. talented. She knew this. Knowing I had something to do with those emotions pained me. She shrugged again and continued to study her feet. “Why aren’t you inside dancing with your date?” I asked.

I affected her.” I closed the distance between us. Immediately.“Why are you out here. “Seeing me dance with Kendra doesn’t bother you?” She shook her head and her chest began rising and falling erratically with each quick breath. I reveled in that knowledge.” Her pale throat constricted as she swallowed hard. The pain in her eyes almost brought me to my knees. Grinning at her attempt to act indifferent when I could hear her heart racing in her chest. I’d suggested this color. Nothing else mattered. I reached out and grabbed her hand and pulled her against me. Why? I wasn’t sure.” she tartly replied. I needed to erase the look in her eyes.” Pagan stepped back away from me. Most girls can’t pull it off but on you it’s perfect. The need to growl my approval was overwhelming. I managed to keep from out right laughing. I let my eyes travel down her dress and enjoyed the simple fact she’d bought it for me. But I needed to know she desired me too. But right now. The more we touched the stronger my need to possess her became. . “Nothing that concerns you. Pagan? What’s wrong?” I wanted to hear her say it. This dress hadn’t been bought for the quarterback. “Really?” I asked “Really. “I knew pale pink would suit you. I hadn’t meant to hurt her. This was what I’d tried so hard to keep from happening. You’re right. “You think I don’t want to touch you the way I touch Kendra. It would only torture me further.

risked her life with my obsessive need. I wouldn’t have to beg you to run. “You can’t scare me off and I’m not running away. That wasn’t what I wanted. please. I cradled her face in my hands. “Go.” I couldn’t stop myself. Something happens. “And when you react the way you do. What is it the song you sing to me says? ‘Yet you stay. To let me go. honest. I feel the clawing inside me to take what I want. I recoiled.” I paused and let my gaze drop to her full pink lips. I couldn’t harm her. Making me hers. It is lonely and cold. Run.” Something irreparable was happening. Souls feared me. Stopping. I am not what you think I am.” I needed to leave now. “I don’t care what you are. The silky texture caused a sharp hot painful need to grip me.” The soft warm breaths against my thumb might as well have been iron bars wrapping around me pulling me toward her. I slowly turned back around and glared at her. talented. I quickly stepped away from her. You want to know what I am and I can’t tell you. But not her. I closed my eyes from the intoxicating sight of her mouth and tried hard to fight for control. Terrified I’d gone too far. I wasn’t meant for her. But the instant I saw it flicker across her face. Gently I ran my thumb over her bottom lip. I stared directly into hers. As I began walking off. Maybe fear was the only solution. run. I am not ‘intelligent. “when I’m near you like this. I needed her to understand. Holding on to . Pagan. and compassionate’ although hearing you say those words in my defense felt like warm liquid pouring through my cold veins."When I touch Kendra I mentally cringe at having to continue to pull off the farce of being interested in her. Desperate to save her from myself. If you knew. This was a mistake. You can’t go where I walk. Never her. “You’re the one thing I want the most in the world yet the one thing I cannot have.” Unable to step away. When I can’t control my need for you and allow myself to touch you it ignites a monster inside of me that I’m afraid I’ll lose control over. Opening my eyes. Because to have you completely would be impossible. Until now it has been all I’ve known. I couldn’t scare her. Didn’t she hear me? I’d told her so much more than she was supposed to know.” she stated loudly taking a step toward me. Then you became the appointed and everything changed. You make me feel things I’ve never felt before. “The purpose of my existence is not to have a mate. I needed more. I heard her running after me.

yet you stay. I nipped her bottom lip then gently soothed the bite with my tongue. you stay. Her soul was releasing from her body. The cold is not meant for you yet you stay. But Pagan controlled me now. . With each hungry touch from Death she relinquished herself to me.” Before she could stop me. I was no longer in control of my choices. I needed more. I began tasting the soft skin along her neck as words Death should never promise anyone spilled from my lips. I fled. Terror washed over me as I jerked out of her embrace and stepped back. Pagan. Somewhere in the haze of the ecstasy I sensed danger. The touch of her hands sent a tremble through me as she grabbed my face and claimed my mouth. She was exotic. When I know it’s not right for you’. Mine. I want this so damn bad. To experience it. I can’t control myself much longer. More. But I can’t." She’d memorized my words to her. Pagan was. She was mine.me. Her soul owned me. “I can’t. The sweet taste that I could give no label because it was uniquely hers consumed me. She was delicious. “Go. The pleading look in her eyes was my undoing. she took another cautious step toward me. Then I recognized the danger. Pagan. you stay. I needed to know her flavor. How could I stay away? A growl erupted from my chest and I seized her in one swift movement. My mouth was on hers instantly.” I managed to whisper through my pain. Her small hands grabbed handfuls of my shirt and I wanted to roar in triumph. I needed more. My chest felt as if someone had ripped it in two. I’d do anything to keep her. Now. This was the only chance I’d have to taste her and I wanted it all. Instead. reaching out a hand that I push away.

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