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life. and how to have one.

March 12, 2009
Ease a painful
morning after
foods to alleviate
your hangover
Not just horsin around
a photo essay of two
students devotion to
their horses
by the
the re-emergence
of facial fur
March 12, 2009
Editor Matt Hirschfeld
Associate editor Jessica Sain-Baird
Designers Erica Birkman, Lauren
Contact Elliot Kort, Stephanie Schneider
Health Sachiko Miyakawa, Megan Weltner
Manual Becka Cremer, Katherine Mulder,
Adam Schoof
Notice Madeline Hyden, Ross Stewart,
Zach White
Play Kelly Breckunitch, Kristopher
Contributors Drew Anderson, Mark
Arehart, Alicia Banister, Taylor Brown, Chance
Dibben, Mia Iverson, Carly Halvorson, Daniel
Nordstrom, Meghan Nuckolls, Tom Powers,
Abigail Olcese, Brieun Scott, Kelci Shipley,
Amanda Sorell
Creative consultant Carol Holstead
Contact us
The University Daily Kansan
111 Stauffer-Flint Hall
1435 Jayhawk Blvd.
Lawrence, KS 66045
Billy Spears and the
Beer Bellies
Johnnys Tavern, 6 p.m., free,
Poker Pub
The Pool Room, 7 p.m. and 10
p.m., free, 21+
Chess night at Aimees
Aimees Coffee House, 7 p.m.,
free, all ages
The Black Lips/
Gentleman Jessee & His
Men/Wrong Crowd!
The Bottleneck, 7 p.m., $13.50
to $15, all ages
That Acoustic Jam
Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., $2, 21+
Beneft for KU Queers
and Allies featuring
Panda Circus, Bebop
Flimfam, Boogie
Nightmares and more!
The Eighth Street Taproom, 10
p.m. $3, 21+
Leeches of Lore
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., $2,
thursday, march 12
Poker Pub
Conroys Pub, 6 p.m. and 9
p.m., free, all ages
Neon Dance Party
The Bottleneck, 10 p.m.,
prices vary, 18+
Son Venezuela
Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., $4, 21+
Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m.,
$5 to $7, 18+
The Booty Up with
Cyrus D and Godzilla!
The Eighth Street Taproom,
10 p.m., $3, 21+
Stardeath and White
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., $2,
The Get Up Kids
Liberty Hall, 8 p.m., $20.50
adv or $23.50 door, all ages
The Granada, 9 p.m., $5, 18+
That Damn Sasquatch/
The Delta Saints/The
Hollywood Ten
The Bottleneck, 9 p.m., $3
to $5, 18+
Manchild with Arcane
Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., $4, 21+
Steddy-P & DJ Gtrain/
David Hasselhoff on
Acid/Johnny Quest/
Left E. Grove
Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m.,
$5 to $7, 18+
The Hidden Pictures
with the ACBs
The Eighth Street Taproom,
10 p.m., $3, 21+
Boo & Boo Too/Wrong
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., $3,
friday, march 13
Poker Pub
Conroys Pub, 6 p.m. and 9
p.m., free, all ages
Greg Laswell with Jay
Nash/Anya Marina
The Bottleneck, 8 p.m., $11,
all ages
Scott Smith Band
Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., $4, 21+
Bay Boy Presents ... /
Spring Bling
The Granada, 10 p.m., $5, 18+
Story of D: Archetype
& Friends
Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m.,
$5 to $7, 18+
Candlepants and Gloria
Vanderbilts Dance
The Eighth Street Taproom,
10 p.m., $3, 21+
The Dactyls & Friends
EP release
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., $3,
saturday, march 14 monday, march 16
The Kellihans pre-St.
Pattys Matinee!
Replay Lounge, 5 p.m., $5
to $7, 18+
The Kellihans early
St. Pattys warm up
on the patio
Replay Lounge, 6 p.m., $3,
all ages
Poker Pub
The Pool Room, 7 p.m. and
10 p.m., free, 21+
Shellshag/This Bike
is a Pipebomb/Stupid
Jackpot Music Hall, 7 p.m.,
$5/$7, 18+
Smackdown! Trivia
and Karaoke
The Bottleneck, 8:30 p.m.,
prices vary, 18+
Jazz on a Sunday
The Eighth Street Taproom,
10 p.m., $2, 21+
Thomas Function/
Human Eye/Terrible
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m.,
$2, 21+
sunday, march 15
jayplayers editors note
Im a picker.
When I get nervous,
my hand heads
straight for my beard.
Before I know it, Ive
unknowingly picked a
nice little patch of my
facial hair (usually in the chin area). I then feel
the need to grow my beard to a slightly hobo-
esque length so I can have a mini comb over
to cover the bald spot.
My choice to have facial hair affects more
than just my anxious habits, though:
Keepin it friendly
Im the go-to guy for facial hair comparison
among my friends. About half of my guy friends
can grow only wisps-in-the-wind, and the
others are patchy at best. For a small number
who occasionally have and can grow full facial
hair, its out of sheer laziness and not because
they necessarily want the facial decoration.
The lesser hair-endowed friends do
sporadically, yet adamantly, badger me to shave
it. They dont get that the beard is a part of who
I ama facial tattoo if you will. Its my choice
to adorn the look. It started as a way to save
some dough and to save some time during my
morning routine, but now its a part of me.
wednesday, march 18
Andrew Bird/
Heartless Bastards
Liberty Hall, 8 p.m. $21.50
adv, all ages
Dollar Bowling
Royal Crest Bowling Lanes, 9
p.m., $1, all ages
Original Music
The Bottleneck, 9 p.m., free,
Neil Halstead of
Mojave 3/Joshua
James/Barclay Martin
Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m.
$10 adv or $12 door, 18+
Talk Normal/Boo &
Boo Too/Coat Party
The Eighth Street Taproom,
10 p.m., $3, 21+
Franklin Panthers
Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., $2,
tuesday, march 17
St. Pattys Day
The Granada, 11 a.m., free,
St. Pattys Day Show
with 45 RPM!
Jackpot Music Hall, 1 p.m., $2,
St. Pattyo Celebration!
Replay Lounge, 1 p.m., $5, all
ages until 9 p.m.
Tuesday Nite Swing
The Kansas Union, 8 p.m., free,
all ages
Joan Baez
Liberty Hall, 8 p.m., $39.50,
all ages
St. Pattyo Celebration
Replay Lounge, 9 p.m., $3, 21+
Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m., $8
to $10, 18+
Thik Lizzy St. Patricks
Day Celebration 2009!
The Eighth Street Taproom, 10
p.m., $3, 21+
Bargain grooming
Those Gillette and Schick razors with an
unreasonable number of blades were getting
a tad pricey for my budget. I resorted to
eventually using the much cheaper one-time-
use blades for awhile, but eco-guilt took over
from throwing away so much plastic.
Ive gone through three beard trimmers
in my two years of beardom. Luckily, Wal-
Mart has a lenient return policy, so when one
hits the bathroom foor, a replacement is just
waiting for me on the shelf. All in all, Ive spent
about $20 on my facial hair needs in the past
two years. Maybe once I start making the big
bucks Ill go back to the blades.
On the job
Im on the job hunt, and Im constantly
hearing that clean shavin is the way to be.
When I do trim up my beard to a respectable
length, though, I think I look pretty snazzy.
After all, unless a future employer has strict
grooming guidelines, Ill be sporting my facial
hair on the job, so I might as well break it to
them in the interview.
It can start to look a tad unprofessional, Ill
admit, after about a week and a half of letting
it fourish. Once a 9-to-5 job falls into my lap,
Ill be more of a stickler about my facial
hair grooming. But at this time in my life,
more than just coworkers see (and actually
appreciate) my fuzzy mug.
In the bedroom
Luckily, the signifcant others Ive had
since Ive had my facial hair enjoyed my
beard almost as much as Ive enjoyed not
shaving it. Theyve not only enjoyed it, theyve
preferred it. When I do shave my facial hair,
my 5 oclock shadow shows up at about
noon, and even butterfy kisses become
painful for my signifcant others.
I know facial hair is absent in my mug
shot. It was taken when I was just starting to
establish some great friendships, nonchalantly
shelling out cash, working a mind-numbingly
boring job, and dating no one. Lets just say
life is much better now.
Matt Hirschfeld, editor
In the March 5 issue of Jayplay, Travis Millards
name was misspelled in the article, It starts
with a drink and ends here.
4 March 12, 2009
Photo illustrations by Sachiko Miyakawa
Brazilian wax
Esthetician Brenda Lehman applies wax to hair and
covers it with a strip. She quickly peels off the strip
when the wax has cooled. She usually uses soy-based
wax, but sometimes chooses different wax that fts
each clients hair type.
Unlike a regular
bikini wax, a Brazilian
wax removes all the hair
from the front to back of
the genital region. Warm
wax is applied to hair
and ripped off quickly
when it has cooled. This
process is repeated until
the entire area is clean.
Brazilian waxing can be safe if a specialist
does it properly, says Lee Bittenbender,
dermatologist at the Dermatology Center of
Lawrence. But he says clients should be aware
that waxing can still cause ingrown hairs and
skin irritation.
Brazilian waxing is the most popular
service at Body And Soles Simply Wax, 719
Massachusetts Street, says Brenda Lehman,
esthetician at the salon. The service is available
for $55. About 95 percent of her clients get a
Brazilian wax, she says.
Lehman recommends using anti-bacterial
lotion and avoiding bathing, showering or
suntanning at least for 24 hours after waxing.
The wax can be painful at frst. She says,
however, follow-up sessions are less painful
once hair grows back, because the pores of
skin open wider and regrown hair is weaker.
Lehman says her clients can also have fun
and experiment after waxing. Some of them
get gem designs on their bikini area, and others
leave part of their hair and have it dyed pink
or blonde.
Sachiko Miyakawa
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March 12, 2009
Your head is pounding, you feel as if youre
going to vomitthinking about last nights
Jager shots sends you into a complete state of
agony. As you lie in bed, your mouth longs for
even the smallest amount of saliva to secrete
from your tongue to moisten the cottonmouth
The hangover.
More than 75 percent of alcohol consumers
have experienced a hangover at least once, and
25 percent of college students feel symptoms
weekly, according to a study conducted by the
American Medical Association.
Now the big question: How do we cure our
misery? Courtney Beck, Leawood freshman,
says she turns to a heaping plate of hot
pancakes. I crave the buttery goodness. After a
long night out I just need something with a lot
of substance, Beck says.
Sam Douthit, Wichita sophomore, agrees.
Anything big and greasy. Usually a huge pizza is
what I want, Douthit says.
However, the science behind hangovers
shows greasy foods are in fact a bad idea after
a night out.
Consuming alcohol causes dehydration
and the loss of vitamins and minerals. Drinking
alcohol blocks the creation of vasopressin (the
antidiuretic hormone). Without the production
of vasopressin, the kidneys send water directly
to the bladder instead of reabsorbing it into
the body. This explains why people use the
restroom more than usual when drinking
alcohol. The frequent urination gets rid of salt,
potassium and other vital electrolytescausing
fatigue, headaches and severe dehydration the
next morning.
However, nausea is caused by what is going
on in the stomach. Alcohol is absorbed directly
through the stomach, causing the cells that line
the stomach to become irritated. Also, alcohol
increases the secretion of hydrochloric acid in
the stomach, eventually causing the nerves to
send a message to your brain that the stomachs
contents are hurting the body and must get out
of the body by vomiting.
Basically, how you feel after a binge is you
feel like shit, says Terri Rogers, program manager
with the American Council on Alcoholism.
Drinking affects every part of the body.
Greasy and fatty foods
It is common for people to assume that
greasy and fatty foods are the best cure for a
hangover, which is a myth. Sally Berry Brown,
registered dietician with Body Fuel, Inc., says
these foods are more likely to make your
stomach irritation worse.
However, Brown does say that eating fatty
foods before drinking may prevent a hangover.
Fatty foods stick to the stomach longer and
help with the absorption of alcohol.
Drinking on an empty or near empty
stomach is never good. If you have some
substance in there, the body has more time to
process the alcohol and increase a drinkers
chances of feeling decent in the morning,
Brown says. So although greasy foods the
morning after are not a good idea, eating these
foods before drinking may in fact help you
prevent or ease a hangover.
Brown and Rogers say the best way to avoid
a hangover is to drink a glass of water after
every alcoholic drink. The water will keep you
hydrated and energized.
If you are plagued with a hangover, eating a
balanced meal before or after drinking could
have helped prevent or alleviate it. Although
these tips may help your symptoms, no matter
what you eat or drink, the body still has to
soak up all of the toxins that are released by
consuming alcoholso time is the only true
cure. JP
The consumption of alcohol depletes the
amount of magnesium and potassium in
your body, causing you to feel fatigued. These
magnesium and potassium rich foods can
in fact refuel some of that lost energy, and
more importantly replenish the electrolytes
lost the night before. Brown recommends
that people who crave pancakes slice some
bananas to put on top.
The ideal morning-after meal
A large glass of water
A multi-vitamin
Two scrambled eggs on wheat toast
A glass of orange juice
A banana

and a couple aspirin or ibuprofen
would not hurt
Brown says people cannot drink enough
water after a long night of drinking. Drinking
an alcoholic beverage causes the body to
lose approximately four times that amount
of water. Water is one of the best cures for
a hangover because most of the symptoms
that make people feel badly are caused by
Eggs contain an ingredient called cysteine.
Cysteine is an amino acid that helps soak up
toxins in the body. Also, the protein cysteine
is a great source of energy. Brown eggs are
a better source of protein the morning after
because they are low in fat.
Fruit juice
The vitamins in fruit juice are great for
replacing lost nutrients and the sugar helps
to naturally increase the bodys energy.
However, Brown says that a piece of fruit
is better than the juice. The sugars and
vitamins that come from oranges and
grapefruits are especially benefcial, Brown
says, but if a glass of orange juice is what
really sounds good, then go for it.
The hell of a hangover
The science behind hangovers and what
foods really work to ease the pain
By Megan Weltner
Photo illustrations by Tyler Waugh
Cut the fat: Greasy food may be on the mind the morning after a hard night of drinking, but greasy and fatty food can
actually irritate the stomach even more. A well-rounded breakfast of fruit juice, eggs and bananas is more benefcial.
Hangover helpers
Sally Berry Brown, registered dietician with Body Fuel, Inc., discusses morning-after foods and drinks.
February 26, 2009
photo essay
March 12, 2009 6
For the love of horses
Two students take the reins
was really nervous. I retraced the steps
in my mind that led me to this fear. I had
driven up to De Soto to shoot a photo
essay about horses. I never thought I would
be face-to-face with an animal this big. I put
on a helmet and pads but still felt very afraid. I
had paid close attention as Chelsea Davidson,
owner of Dunrovin Farms, demonstrated how
to mount a horse, but she made it seem easy.
After a deep breath and a couple of botched
attempts, I hoisted myself over Winston and
kicked my foot into the stirrup. I was on the
horse, a lot higher up than I imagined I would
be. As I attempted and eventually succeeded
to get Winston to walk forward and turn, I
started to feel at ease.
I was riding a horse for the frst time,
and most of the fear left me. My mom had
described horseback riding to me, but it was
more exciting than I imagined.
* * *
Some students grow up taking care of cats
and dogs. Chelsea Davidson, Overland Park
senior, and Laura Stephens, Lenexa senior,
grew up with horses.
Chelsea and Laura have ridden for more
than 10 years and 17 years, respectively.
Chelsea recently moved into her own barn,
By Tyler Waugh
Murphy gets trimmed with a razor. Laura says
she visits Murphy about four times a week
depending on the weather.
Chelsea, left, says she spends about 21 hours a week tending
to her horses. Her duties include cleaning stalls, feeding
horses, and taking them indoors and outdoors. Because she
lives in the top foor of the barn where the horses are kept,
she can always keep an eye on them.
Chelseas English saddle is one of many different kinds of
saddles, including the western saddle, which has a horn and
is often used by beginners.
Laura gives Murphy a kiss. In addition to grooming and feeding,
horses also need love, attention and adequate space to frolic.
which she lives in with eight horses, four of
which are hers. Chelseas business involves
boarding and selling the horses. Winston, one
of her horses, is a 10-year-old thoroughbred.
Laura keeps her horse, Murphy, a 14-year-old
appendix quarter horse, at the barn. Having
horses is a lot of workChelsea and Laura
have to feed, water and groom them, as well as
keep the stalls clean and ride them. They also
have to deal with inconsistent Kansas weather
to keep their horses from getting sick. For
them, horses are not so much a pet as a way
of life. JP
March 12, 2009
Chelsea snuggles with Winston. Chelsea had Dunrovin Farms built so she could have a
place to keep her and her clients horses and start a business.
1 2 3
4 5
How to mount a horse
1. Position the mounting block next to the
horse to get the extra height you need to
2. Adjust the stirrup to the position you want.
This will be used as a footrest and helps the
rider mount.
3. Put your left food in the stirrup and position
your hands on the horse as well as the
4. This is the tricky one. Push yourself over
the horse while keeping your foot in the
5. Swing your body to position yourself in the
saddle while putting your right foot in the
other stirrup.
Winston and Murphy horse around. All of the equipment on a horse is called tack, which includes the saddle, bits and lead ropes,
among other parts.
photo essay
March 12, 2009
Laura and Chelsea compete in the hunter/
jumper circuits. Laura and Murphy compete in
the hunters, which is judged on consistency and
accuracy over fences. Winston and I compete
in the jumpers, which you try to go clearnot
knock down any polesin the fastest time
possible, Chelsea says.
Winston and Murphy both live in the barn,
whereas some of the other horses live outside.
Chelsea says that she normally houses eight to
14 horses.
Laura uses a lunging rein on Murphy. Lunging is a
training technique that involves the horse circling around
the trainer and the trainer controls the speed and
distance of the horse. Lunging calms down a horse.
When the weather gets cold, the outside horses are
given blankets. This keeps them warm and protects
them from getting sick.
Contributed photo
Tyler rides a horse for the frst time at Dunrovin Farms. Although
he says the experience was a bit scary, he hopes to ride again.
Photos by Tyler Waugh
Watch a video
about horse
mounting and
lunging with this
story at Kansan.
March 12, 2009
with Carly Halvorson and Elliot Kort
I hooked up with someone over the
weekend who did stuff during sex that I
didnt like. How are you supposed to tell
someone that you dont know that well
what youre comfortable with?
Katie, freshman
Elliot: Especially when it comes to issues of
physical intimacy, dealing out criticism can get
a bit dicey. I mean, really, who wants to hear
theyre doing anything wrong? So instead of
being critical and negative about what you
dont like, point out things you do enjoy and
get his mind headed in a different direction.
However, seeing as how you mentioned
that this is a random hookup, I think youre
going to have to force yourself to be more
direct. If youre going to be dating someone,
taking more time and care to be constructively
critical makes sense. But if youre going to go
out and look for different guys to sleep with all
the time, youve got to get your courage up to
speak your mind.
Carly: In an ideal situation, I think Elliots
advice would work just fne. But this isnt an
ideal situationthis is a random hookup. Its
hard to stop in the heat of the moment and say,
I dont like that. I like this instead, and then
proceed with your list of turn-ons. Its even
more awkward to bring it up before anything
even starts to happen. Instead, stick with the
clich of actions speak louder than words. If
hes doing something that you dont like, stop
him and take some control of the situation.
You dont have time for a heart-to-heart. By
doing this, youre still being honest and direct,
but youre getting something accomplished.
Hell pick up on what you like a lot faster
than if you had said something to him. If hes
not getting the hint, you have every right to
stop. Sex is supposed to be enjoyable for both
people involved.
I was hanging out with a few friends of
mine (a couple) and they invited a friend
of theirs over. After a while, I realized
they were trying to set me up with him.
But I only figured it out after I agreed to
have coffee with him. Im not interested
in him at all. How do I proceed?
Lucy, junior
Elliot: Once again, honesty is the best policy
here. Not clicking with someone your friends
tried to set you up with isnt your fault. After
all, you had no idea you were supposed to
make that kind of impression in the frst place.
And, on top of that, your friends have no right
to get huffy with you. They shouldnt have kept
you in the dark. So as far as Im concerned,
youre in the clear.
Get coffee with him and let him know the
deal. That way, you can point out that you like
him enough to hang out, but youll avoid the
awkwardness of any further advances. And you
avoid blame because you didnt put yourself (or
him) in that situation. After the coffee date, Id
sit down with your other buds and point out
that you dont like being matched up without
your knowledge. I mean, honestly, it puts you
in such a discomfted position. Thats simply
not fair.
Carly: I think you should put your friends in
an equally uncomfortable position and have
them deliver the bad news to this guy. It was
their idea to set you up with him; it should be
their responsibility to admit to him that their
stupid plan failed. I dont think you have any
obligation to this guy at all. Theyre the ones
who gave him false hopes of being set up on
a blind date.
Its extremely rude of them to assume that
you would be okay with their plan without
mentioning it to you beforehand. Now you
feel like a bad person because you made a
commitment under false pretenses. Also, make
sure you tell your friends to stop playing
matchmaker. I get so annoyed with couples
who want their friends to partner off so that
they can form their little couple-groups and do
ridiculous couple-stuff. They need to back off.
Have relationship questions or need some advice? E-mail
*Bitch and Moan is not to be considered as a substitute for professional help.
How We
Marching Jayhawk band members Kyle
Martin and Kristen Kelly found themselves
marching to the same beat when they met in
Spring 2007.
It was Kyles freshman year and Kristens
sophomore year when their mutual friend,
Tyler, had them both over for a party. They had
the same group of friends, and both were in
the Marching Jayhawks, but they didnt know
of each other at the time. Kyle, of Fort Worth,
Texas, says being in the band resulted in them
spending a lot of time together. We both love
music, and we both love KU, Kyle says. So
its perfect.
Kristen, of Estes Park, Colorado, started
dating Kyle on August 23, 2007, and their frst
date was at their favorite restaurant, Paisanos.
However, traveling with the Jayhawks around
the country has allowed these two to even
have dates at last years Orange Bowl and this
years Insight Bowl. Playing at the Insight Bowl
together, they both say, was the best time they
have had on the Marching Jayhawks.
Kyle, a trombone player, says hes excited to
go with Kristen, a fute and piccolo player, to
the Big 12 and NCAA tournaments because
its her frst time being a traveling member of
the Mens Basketball Band.
Kyles mother marched and played piccolo
at KU from 1979 to 1982, he says, so its easy
for his mother to love Kristen.
Stephanie Schneider

Contributed photos
Beat of the same drum: Kyle Martin and Kristen Kelly
are both members of the Marching Jayhawks.
Many corporations discourage their
employees from getting romantically involved.
But for Madeline Johnson, Overland Park
sophomore, and Jonathan Herrera-Thomas,
Topeka sophomore, her frst day on the job
was the couples frst date.
Johnson had transferred from one of
the Overland Park Target locations to the
Lawrence location at the start of her freshman
year. And the stress started from the get-go.
They decided to schedule me the day I
moved in, Madeline says.
Jonathan had already been working at the
Lawrence Target, and in preparation for a
massive sale, the two were paired together
for a six-hour shift running the guest service
desk. The two immediately clicked and started
We had all the conversations you have on
the frst few dates, Jonathan says.
After that, however, they hit a bit of a snag.
After hitting it off, each had trouble defning
exactly what they were becoming as a couple.
The frst few dates were confusing, he says,
because we didnt know if they were dates.
But after three evenings they didnt want
to endduring which he taught her how to
drive stick shift and she insisted they stop at a
playground to build sandcastlesthey had the
talk and havent looked back. Neither work at
Target anymore, but they admit they cant help
but feel a little tug at the heartstrings whenever
they walk past the guest service counter.
Elliot Kort
Contributed photo
Right on target: Madeline Johnson and Jonathan Herrera-
Thomas met while working together at Target.
How We
February 26, 2009
11 March 12, 2009 March 12, 2009 10
Boldly bearded and
shamelessly mustached
By Zach White
I look around at my fellow revelers at the
Replay Lounge. I see two bearded men sitting
at the bar, laughing. In the corner, a man with
a mustache smokes a cigarette. Two more
mustached gentlemen sit along the wall and
discuss favorite musicians. In fact, it appears
that more than half of those able to grow facial
hair in this establishment have done so.
These sightings are not mere isolated
instances. Bewhiskered fellows can be seen all
over Lawrence. They sell you tacos. They style
your hair. They even serve on the Lawrence
City Commission. Our town is run by the
It seems that after 30 years of hibernation,
the hair is back. It is so back.
Just how back is it? As the American
Mustache Institute, a pro-mustache advocacy
group, points out on their website, www., the 2008
Academy Awards brought us the frst
mustached Best Actor winner since Paul
Newman won in 1987, with Daniel Day Lewis
in There Will Be Blood. Heck, facial hair has
appeared in some form on People magazines
Sexiest Man Alive listincluding Hugh Jackman
to Matthew McConaugheyfor the past four
years. It doesnt get any more offcial than that,
does it?
In the world of motion pictures, the
incubation of hair on the faces of famous
people has also been sweeping the biz. Such
immensely popular faces, such as those of
George Clooney and Brad Pitt, have been
covered. The anti-shaving movement has also
been sweeping the world of music, with many
notable indie acts sporting some distinctive
styles, including Iron and Wine, The Flaming
Lips and The New Pornographers. Even more
mainstream acts have been jumping the ol
Top left: Eric Margules, Kalamazoo, Michigan, senior, says that his beard is a result of laziness. Its just too much of a pain in the ass to shave every day, Margules says, plus
my face is really sensitive.
Dominant photo: Samuel Weber, former KU student fromWichita, says he grew his beard out of necessity while on a month-long camping trip. He plans to shave soon because
his beard becomes too much of a topic. I dont want to talk about it every time I go out,Weber says.
wagon. Dave Grohl of the Foo Fighters, Rivers
Cuomo of Weezer, Brandon Flowers of The
Killers and Ben Gibbard of Death Cab For
Cutie have all been recently sporting some
all-natural chin covers.
The 1970s were a golden era for facial hair
of all colors. America flled its movie houses
to sit in quiet appreciation of such legendary
mustaches as Burt Reynolds. They tuned
in each night as the news came forth from
underneath Walter Cronkites mustache, as if
it were acting as a sieve, distilling the truth
to its most reliable form.
Where rock n roll had
its Ted Nugent and Frank
Zappa, disco had ABBA
and its bearded king
Barry Gibb. The country
had fown into face fur
frenzy. And for those
with the look, things
were good.
Then, in 1981,Uncle
Walter Cronkite left the CBS Evening News,
and took his mustache with him. This was
the frst step in the fall of the follicles and the
rise of the razor. At least thats the way Aaron
Perlut, chairman of the American Mustache
Institute, sees it.
Cronkite retired and it seemed like all of
the mustached newsmen went away, Perlut
says. And it just kind of steamrolled until
mustaches were deemed uncool.
The following two decades, the hair had a
diffcult time reaching outside the realmof blue
collar labor and secondary math and science
education. The men came back, or rather, the
hair did, bursting out of the cheeks and chins of
Americas men like the sprouts of a new spring,
after a particularly harsh and trying winter.
Driven by the Internet and pride in their
innate masculine abilities, men across the
nation began participating in month-long
celebrations of this hair, such as No Shave
November and March Mustache Madness.
In fact, nearly every month has established
reasons to grow, so there is no excuse to
shave. Ever.
Festivals have been established in honor of
the hair and the men who grow it.
Since the late 90s, an international
competition, the World Beard and Mustache
Championships, has
been held biennially in
locations across Europe
and the United States.
Started in Germany, the
competition, divided into
17 categories, continues
to be dominated by the
Germans each time.
The competition in
2007 featured the frst
competitors from the United States. And
the next round is to be hosted this May in
Anchorage, Alaska.
The American Mustache Institute hosts
one such event, the annual Stache Bash in St.
Louis, Missouri. Not so much a competition,
the event is more an excuse to get together
and have some drinks with several hundred
people who have a similar interest in the
advancement of hairy faces. Aside from
admiring masculinity, it is also a charity
function. The money raised by the event goes
to Challenger Baseball, a St. Louis baseball
league for people with disabilities.
And it is not the frst time that a mans
natural ability to yield hair with absolutely
no effort has been used to help others. Since
1999, a group called Mustaches for Kids has
been accepting monetary pledges from friends,
family and well-wishers to donate to charities.
In doing so, the group has raised more than
$150,000 for various childrens groups.
During last years television writers strike,
the chin-ful was once again utilized to aid a
cause. Late night talk show hosts Conan
OBrien and David Letterman stopped shaving
for the duration of the strike to show their
sympathy for their staff s cause.
Not everyone is so noble in their growings,
though. Most peoples reasons for fostering
their follicles fall between vanity and laziness.
Not that theres anything wrong with that.
Gavon Laessig, a writer for
and local purveyor of fne facial coverings, is
rarely seen about town without some sort
of decoration adorning the lower reaches of
his face. Recently, he shaved his mustache in
order to move in a more beardy direction.
For him, facial hair is an accessory, a distinctive
complement to ones overall look. Whereas
women have makeup, all manner of jewelry
and a number of hair-oriented accessories,
Laessig is of the mind that we must work with
what our gods gave us.
Nick Kellerman, a Kansas City, Kansas,
junior, studying Japanese, thinks similarly.
People associate all of their clothing and
things as ways to defne yourself as a man, and
what better way to do that than with facial
hair, says Kellerman, who has personally been
growing sideburns since the age of 16, inspired
by Elvis Presley, and braving some ridicule at
the time.
And though the reception to his facial
hair around here may have warmed recently,
he actually just returned from a land of little
appreciation for it. Kellerman spent a year
Facial Hair February / Furbruary
Mutton Chops / Masculine March
Atrocious April
Manly May
No Shave November
Dont Shave December
abroad in Asia, where he was forced to bear the
brunt of Eastern prejudices. Kellerman says in
those exotic cultures, facial hair is considered
dirty and suitable only for an old man, which
coincidentally became his nickname among
the company he kept. He also says most of
the guys he met had a bit of diffculty growing
facial hair. So this writer suspects a mere case
of jealousy.
Aside from a completely logical idolatry of
the King, Kellerman holds a few more reasons
for his sported scruff.
It keeps you warm in winter, he says,and
if your relationship is going too good, it can
give your girlfriend something to bitch about.
Which brings up one of the pitfalls of a
mans pursuit of facial greatness. What will the
ladies think?
Perlut of the American Mustache Institute
says he believes that most women fnd the
mustache objectionable and that men who wish
to have something on their face will engage in
what he calls the spousal compromise of a
full beard. He also believes these men to be
weaker-willed and at odds with the essential
principlesfor example, that the beard is
weaker than the mustacheof the Institute.
Sarah Hicks, Bennington freshman,
corroborated Dr. Perluts assessment.
I dont mind, I guess, Hicks says. I dont
think Id be attracted to it.
She did, however, express an interest in
trading natural abilities.
If guys would carry a baby for nine months
and wed get facial hair, Id switch, she says.
It seems that
after 30 years of
hibernation, the
hair is back. It is
so back.
continued on page 12
From Matthew McConaughey to Brad Pitt, the
returning trend of facial hair fashion
Photos by Chance Dibben
Left and far right: Facial hair comes
in all kinds of styles and colors, from
mustache-dominant patterns to full-on
Center: Eric Margules strokes his
burgeoning beard. He cites Richie
Tenenbaum from The Royal
Tenenbaums and Ewan McGregor
as Obi-Wan Kenobi in the Star Wars
movies as primary beard infuences.
Center below: Samuel Weber and
Robert Knapp, Houston, Texas, senior,
model their bristly visages. Knapps
succinctly elaborates on his reason for
his beard: Tools shave.
Joshua Anderson, Perry junior, says his wife
possesses a similar kind of ambivalence toward
his beard, with a hint of positivity. This works
for Anderson, as he possesses one of the most
popular styles of facial hair in the Lawrence
area: the laziness beard.
The laziness beard is the offcial facial hair of
those who prefer to ask not, Why grow facial
hair?, but rather, Why shave? Why go through
the effort of scraping hairs from your face, day
after day?
The laziness beard can be recognized by its
uniform length and complete lack of signs of
grooming. This is because it is never groomed.
It would be very easy and possibly offensive
to confuse an ordinary laziness beard with
a beard that is grown as a religious practice.
Certain Orthodox groups of Judaism do not
allow shaving, as it is prohibited in the Talmud.
Monks of Orthodox Christianity refuse to
shave their facial hair as a demonstration of
their lack of concern with the values of this
world, and highlight their focus on the next.
The act of growing facial hair as an act of
rebellion is not limited to those following some
divine law. Such secular facial rebellion was
quite popular in the ultra-rebellious 1960s, and
has been carried on by both fans of the era, and
those that see some similarities between our
world and that one.
The American Mustache Institute has
launched campaigns to fght this discrimination.
In one case, a high school student in Royse
City, Texas, was forced to leave class to go
shave his mustache. The student, Sebastian
Pham, proceeded to approach the Institute to
intercede on his behalf. The Institute sent an
e-mail to the school board about how it felt
the schools actions were discrimination. The
incident led to a comment on the Institutes
blog, allegedly from a school district employee,
bringing up homosexual connotations of facial
hair. There was no offcial policy change.
Another cause picked up by the Institute
was that of a police offcer from Sylvania, Ohio,
being suspended for having too stupendous a
mustache and refusing to do anything about it.
The Institutes objection again led to no real
Because it is 2009, KU students, Lawrence
city commissioners, our mustached U.S.
attorney general and even this writer are all
joining hands with millions of men across this
country to let the world know we will not
shave. JP
continued from
page 11
March 12, 2009



March 12, 2009
Known for her work with bands and
musicians such as Beck, the White Stripes,
Elliot Smith, Fiona Apple, Spoon and many
more, Autumn de Wilde is a renowned
photographer. Her photos have been featured
in Filter, The New York Times and have been used
as artwork and covers for many groups and
artists CDs. She gave some time to Jayplay to
talk about her art, her motivations and some
of her inspirations.
Why do you do this as an art? What
makes you want to do this?
I didnt really pursue it originally. Its
just something we do in our family. We take
pictures of our friends and what were doing,
like my dad had. When I started taking pictures
of my friends or my friends in a band, I didnt
know when I went to a show. It was just a
natural thing because it was what my dad did.
It wasnt in order to be famous or in order to
have a career. So, as more and more people
started liking the photos that I took I realized
how often I felt compelled to take a photo
and I slowly started taking myself seriously as
a photographer. I didnt really think that the
way I liked to take pictures would be a career,
which is good, because if youre going in to
photography to be rich and famous I really
think those are the wrong reasons.
Do you usually have a prior
relationship with the people that
youre photographing, such as
Spoon or the White Stripeshow
does that work?
Its a mixed bag. I was hired to shoot the
White Stripes and we got along so Jack called
me to shoot The Raconteurs. The frst time I
met Jack [White] offcially I was hired to take
some pictures on the set of the My Doorbell
video. They needed a few more publicity
photos. We just really liked each other and
he called me up and asked me to do the frst
Raconteurs record. You know he didnt call me
on my phone; I was called by someone.
With Death Cab I approached them
because I really felt they should be documented
with Autumn de Wilde
because Im a fan. That was the frst time
extending myself to a band I didnt know. Beck
I met before I was a photographer. He was one
of the frst people to really encourage me to
take it seriously. Beck and I both grew up in
L.A. but we didnt meet until 95 or 96.
Are you planning on working with
anyone new soon?
I hope so (laughs).
Do you have anybody in mind?
Long term I document Death Cab, Jenny
Lewis. That doesnt mean that Im on her
doorstep every day. But its someone whose
career and art Im very interested in. When
theres something important going on I try
to get out there and document it. And Spoon
is ongoing. I dont like to talk about it till its
out. I dont like to jinx it. What I did just do is
the Eels new record. That record is coming
out soon, The Decemberists as well. And Im
working on a couple of books but I dont like
to talk about them until theyre fnished.
Its obvious that you love what you
do. What are some of the stresses
that go along with doing this?
Paying the rent (laughs). A career as a
photographer is always unstable and anyone
entering into it should understand that and
thats part of whats exciting about it. Youre
never sure if what youre doing is going to be
important. Its kind of exciting.
Its always fun to make a mess and paint;
its not fun to lay out the paints and put them
away. You know? Its a lot of work being a
photographer and I think over the years Ive
developed a system to making my job enjoyable
whether theres a big budget or a small budget.
I feel like once youre committed to something,
no matter how hard it is, it needs to be fun for
the people involved and professional enough
where the chaos is only creative chaos in an
exciting way.
Its really hard work preparing for
something and getting all the parts you need
together and the money to do it. Its really hard
keeping everything delivered in high quality on
time. Ill tell you my biggest frustration right
now is keeping track and overseeing quality.
People are so interested in getting things done
quickly and multitasking that theyre not always
double-checking that the scan is the right color
of blue. And once its out on the Internet or
printed, its out there forever. You cant fx it.
And I shoot flm only. I have my flm scanned
and there are really specifc tones and colors
and depths that I want. And you know when
youre doing multiple jobs its really hard to
make sure that everything that is going out a
month later after the shoot, or a week later, or
two days later cause its a rush, is going out in
the highest quality that it should.
Who are some of your favorite
artists, musicians, photographers,
authors, anything right now?
Im obsessed with Ang Lee because of
how distinctive his style is without his style
dominating over his work. I think that all of
his movies are in such far reaching places that
are obviously places he doesnt live. I think
whats so amazing about his work, besides its
all so visually stunning, is that his focus is on
the relationship and the relationship according
to the rules of the time period or the scenario
that theyre in. And he always does that so well.
Hes a big inspiration to me. I think the way
he steps out of his shoes and into somebody
elses is really awe-inspiring.
New artists that I admire are, luckily, most
people I photograph. Im really drawn to
artists that draw other great artists around
them. Thats an exciting artist to be around:
someone thats not just the star. They crave
to be inspired and they like to point out how
inspiring those people are to them. I will bring
up a new band that I have recently shot and
love is Tiny Masters of Today. Theyre teenagers,
brother and sister, and their record is coming
out soon and I love it. Theyre songwriters and
theres something awesome about them.
Ross Stewart
Contributed photos
Quite a collection: Photographer Autumn de Wilde has
shot photos for The New York Times and many artists
and bands CD covers.















Its 2 a.m.
I want food delivered
Whats open?
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14 March 12, 2009
Black garlic has hit the culinary scene as the
next greatest super food. The black garlic is
fermented in high heat for a month, which gives
it its black color. Brian Han, chief operations
offcer and co-owner of Black Garlic, Inc., says
the patented fermentation process also creates
high levels of S-Allycysteine, an antioxidant that
has been shown to prevent certain types of
cancer. This new garlic variety tastes sweeter
than plain garlic and its aroma is much less
potent, which may make it the perfect date
food without the offensive breath regular garlic
Forms of fermented garlic have been used
for health purposes in North and South Korea
and Japan for hundreds of years, but the trend
has just recently made an appearance on plates
in the United States. Restaurants up and down
the California coast are including the garlic in
their dishes and Han says demand across the
country is growing. Unfortunately, Black Garlic,
Inc., in California is the only known producer
and supplier, so orders must be shipped. A
Black garlic
1.27-ounce package costs about $3.50 and can
be ordered at
Madeline Hyden
Contributed photo
Food therapy: Black garlic has been shown to prevent
certain types of cancer and has a sweeter taste than
plain garlic.
Girl 1: I like my men
like my peanut butter ...
Girl 2: ... What?
Girl 1: Did anything exciting happen at
the homeless shelter yesterday?
Girl 2: That guy Byron put his hand on
my ass, but pretty low-key night other
than that.
Girl 1: Apparently hes too busy
to call me, but hes not too busy
to post shirtless pictures of
himself on MySpace.
Girl 2: Ass.
Guy: Your hair!
Girl: I know, the girl
bleached the hell out of it.
Guy: Well at least you dont
look like a total whore.
Madeline Hyden
Girl 1: You look really nice today.
Girl 2: Well I ate, so that probably
Girl: Im not an emotional person,
so I dont like emotional guys. If you
cry more than me, Ill punch you.
If you cry because I punched you,
then its really over.
Guy 1: My girlfriend just texted
me and asked if I could bring
her some Sour Patch Kids.
Doesnt she know Im busy?
Guy 2: Brutal, man.
Guy talking about a
break-up: I dont need
her. I have plenty of
friends with benefts.
15 March 12, 2009
Cleaning out your closet? Platos Closet buys
and sells quality used clothing! Sell your clothes
now and receive a FREE pair of sunglasses or
a pair of earrings! Hurry, offer ends March 16
while supplies last!
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16 March 12, 2009
Before you get on that jet plane
or hit the open road, here are some
travel tips to save time, money and
On the road
Betty Oliva, AAA club
spokeswoman, offers these tips for
a road trip:
1. To get an estimate of how much
money you will spend on gas, Oliva
says, go to www.fuelcostcalculator.
com. It calculates fuel cost based on
your type of vehicle.
2. Speeding has a priceliterally.
Each 5 mph driven over 60 mph is
like paying an additional 24 cents
per mile for gas, according to www. Oliva says to get
more miles per gallon, maintain
a steady speed by using cruise
control and avoiding rapid stops or
3. To keep lodging costs down,
look for hotels with special offers
and amenities, Oliva says. Many
hotels offer amenities such as complimentary
breakfasts and discounts, such as for AAA
4. Plan for an emergency by keeping all
cell phones charged and know how to reach
roadside help, Oliva says. Keep important
numbers handy.
Leaving on a jet place
Joe McBride, spokesman for the Kansas City
International Airport, offers these tips for students
fying out of Kansas City International Airport:
1. Sign up to receive text messages that
alert you immediately when there are any
changes involving your fight, such as delays. Go
to and follow the links to fight
insight information.
Photo by Katherine Mulder
Hit the road: Smart and inexpensive travel is the way to go if you
are road trippin or fying this spring break. AAA has plenty of tips to
save some dough for your week-long vacay.
Improve your spring
break travels
[ d o i t y o u r s e l f ]
2. Save money parking at the airport.Economy
parking is $5.50 a day. McBride says to print out a
coupon for a free parking day at
3. Dont think you can arrive at the airport
last minute, even if you are a frequent fyer.
McBride says spring break means more leisure
travelers will be at the airport. Leisure travelers
do not fy as often, which means they will be
slower going through security and have more
questions checking in. Expect to wait.
4. McBride also offers special advice for
those traveling to Mexico: Educate yourself on
where you are going, pay attention to all alerts,
follow all safety advice, and always be aware of
your surroundings.
Katherine Mulder
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Denzel Washington because he fought for what he believed in all
the time in his movies and he never gave up.
Carlos Hernandez, Caracas, Venezuela, junior
[what actor or actress would play
you in a movie about your life?]
Probably Eva Longoria-Parker, because my sister said I looked like
Rebecca Schottler, Shawnee freshman
Cameron Diaz because shes really goofy.
Kelsey Nance, Overland Park freshman
Ben Stiller because hes an innocent guy that all the bad stuff
happens to.
Matt Thiessen, Topeka sophomore
Jessica Simpson because shes silly and funny and kind of dumb.
Kelsey Smith, Topeka sophomore
George Lopez. Hes a funny, Hispanic comedian and thats my
background. That would defnitely represent me, even though his
head is pretty big, and thats not me at all.
Josh Sharp, Mission sophomore
Will Arnett. Hes just pretty crazy and off the wall and spontaneous
and likes to have fun and is just a comedic guy. I kind of think of myself
that way too.
Garrett Petty, Topeka freshman
Out About
Kate Winslet because I really like her and I really respect her as an
Kelly Anderson, Overland Park senior
Brad Pitt because, well, hes pretty fuent in how he speaks and hes
good looking.
Alex Fredrickson, Fort Scott senior
Jessica Alba because shes really pretty and shes mixed like me.
Stephanie Walters, Overland Park freshman
Kelly Breckunitch, who would be portrayed by Philip Seymour
Hoffman because hes a respectable actor who would bring a lot of
gravitas to the role, but he can still cut loose and get a little crazy
March 12, 2009
New Belgium Brewing Company in Fort
Collins, Colorado, is committed to sustainable
brewing practices. Employees of the company
even voted to dip in to their bonus pool to make
the company the countrys frst brewery to
purchase 100 percent of its electricity from wind
power, says Jenn Orgolini, sustainability director.
The company also recycled more than 73 percent
of its waste in 2007, according to its sustainability
report available online. Throw back a New Belgium
Fat Tire Ale, then toss the bottle into a recycling
bin. Youll be joining the city of Fort Collins, which
participates in a New Belgium-sponsored amber
glass recycling program.
For a greener beer in a can, choose Bud Light
this St. Patricks Day. Anheuser-Busch has taken
strides to reduce waste and recycle whenever
possible. Last year, the company reduced the
diameter of the lids on every can, saving millions
of pounds of aluminum and cutting down on
the energy needed for can production. The
company also uses leftover grain from the
brewing process to feed livestock, according to
If New Belgium and Anheuser-Busch arent
green enough for you, grab any light beer and
stir in some food coloring. Try adding blue
Sustainable beer
Photo illustration by Tyler Waugh
Celebrate good times, come on: Drop a few drops
of blue food coloring into your beer to celebrate St.
Pattys Day.
food color instead of green, suggests Francesca
Clarke, a writer at DIY Life. When the blue
mixes with the yellow of the beer, the result is
a richer green color than can be obtained with
green food color.
Becka Cremer
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H|5 8|KE |5 A P|PE8OM8 5UP|D PAkY

HE Ekk|8|E WO5
THU 12
FRI 13
SAT 14
SUN 15
MON 16
THU 12
FRI 13
SAT 14
SUN 15
MON 16
TUE 17
March 12, 2009
MOVIE: Let the Right One In
The horror of Swedens Let the Right
One In is not contained in its brief fashes of
gore, but rather in how serious it treats the
vampire myth and combines the myth with
an astute coming-of-age tale.
But dont get me wrong, Let the Right One
In is effectively unsettling, even perverse, in
its juxtaposition of adolescence and horror-
fantasy. The flmmakers draw resonate
emotions from the story of a fragile 12-year-
old boy named Oskar, who struggles with
his own weaknesses and frustrations.
Tormented by bullies at school, our
introverted protagonist can only fantasize
about revenge, miming it against trees in his
courtyard late at night. It is in this courtyard
that he meets Eli, a 12-year old girl with her
own source of isolation and revulsion; she is
in fact a 200-year-old vampire.
Their love develops as awkwardly as
any young adults but each of them gains
something deeply valuable through the
relationship; Eli is able to reclaim some
aspect of humanity and Oskar is empowered
to defend himself against his tormentors.
Photographed with obsessive austerity,
the flms atmosphere of dread is soberly
stated. Where most horror movies are
punctuated with blood splatter or obtuse
camera angles, the flmmakers of Let the
Right One In never exaggerate, heighten or
underline rendering the flm all the more
stark and creepy.
In many ways heartbreaking but overall
terrifying, Let the Right One In is a penetrating
horror flm because of its seriousness and

Chance Dibben
VIDEO GAME: Killzone 2
The original Killzone was produced for
Playstation 2 and arguably a mediocre frst-
person shooter. Killzone 2 is by no means
mediocre but far superior to its predecessor.
This game is extremely addictive and the
battle sequences are graphically intense.
Killzone 2 picks up where the original
concluded. The war between the Helghast
and the Interplanetary Strategic Alliance has
intensifed. Now the ISA invades Helghan,
home to the Helghast, to try and capture
their leader and stop the war. The gamer plays
as Sergeant Tomas Sevchenko, who, with his
Alpha Team, drops down behind enemy lines
to try and eliminate the Helghast threat.
Graphically, Killzone 2 is a sight for the
eyes. Lots of time was spent designing
this game and the fghters in this game
look pretty dang real. The objects found
throughout the game have a real textural
look about them.
Another aspect that makes this game so
nice is the variety of weapons. What gamer
doesnt love to choose his killing tool?
These guns range from a simple revolver,
to the ISA assault rife, and the sniper rife.
Then, there are the really big guns like the
always entertaining AA gun or the ISA tank.
No matter what the preference, theres a
gun for everyone.
Killzone 2 is probably the best frst-
person shooter released by Playstation 3 thus
far. The game is fairly simple to play and the
gamer can run through the entire storyline in
less than a week. So this game does not have
time to become boring but leaves the gamer
anticipating the next addition to the Killzone
Drew Anderson
MOVIE: Watchmen
Based on the 1980s comic book series
of the same name, Watchmen is a feast for
the eyes and damn fun to watch.
The story takes place in an alternate 1985
and revolves around the death of Edward
Blake, otherwise known as the former
masked crime fghter The Comedian.
Upon the discovery of the murder,
the psychopathic and lone active masked
vigilante Rorschach pieces together a
conspiracy to rub out all of the former
For those who have read the book,
all your favorite characters are here and
pristinely represented. Rorsarch, with all
his vile and tormented domineer, is played
by Jackie Earle Haley, whose raspy voice
stings with insanity. Billy Crudup lends his
detached and almost inhuman voice to Dr.
Manhattanthe only Watchman with super
But the real acting gem is The Comedian,
played by Jeffrey Dean Morgan. Every move
he makes, even the way he smokes his
cigars, is exactly the way he is portrayed in
the book.
For those who havent read the book,
there is still plenty to be seen. The story,
just like the comic by Alan Moore, is
incredibly gripping. The movie runs almost
three hours but never bores.
Everything from Dr. Manhattans fortress
on Mars to Nite Owls II fying ship are an
amazing sight. The way this flm looks is nothing
short of spectacular.
Some might be perturbed at the
slightly changed ending and the sometimes
hokey soundtrack, but overall Watchmen
is both faithful to its source material and
straightforward enough to entertain.
MUSIC: Middle Cyclone, Neko Case
Neko Case uses her ffth album, Middle
Cyclone, to tear her way through the
world of music much the way a tornado
would, leaving listeners affected and
impressed by her captivating voice and
beautiful music. Her nature-flled lyrics
and storm metaphors only add to the
charm and creativity of the album, and the
album features a number of impressive
collaborations, with guests including M.
Ward, members of Calexico, The Sadies,
and Sarah Harmer.
The track People Got A Lotta Nerve
is bright and perky but empowering at the
same time, with Case describing herself as
a maneater, though Middle Cyclone is a
more mellow addition to her collection of
storm-related songs. Case morphs from a
maneater into an animal on Im an Animal,
a track with a catchy beat and a striking
melody. The album ends with Marais la
Nuit, which means The Night Marsh,
and is a collection of exactly that31
minutes of swampy, nighttime noises heard
on a farm in Vermont, which ties the nature
references throughout together in an
outdoorsy conclusion. With this album, Case
brings her talent and creativity together in a
whirlwind of beauty and ingenuity to create
music that will leave its mark on any listener
standing in its path.
Amanda Sorell
Mark Arehart
The seven sins of a supercar
Hedonism in a BMW Z8
By Adam Schoof
March 12, 2009
This is an essay about debauchery. I did not
learn any life lessons from the experiences
mentioned below, but simply drank them
in. There is no moral to this story, only
My friend Sam has a friend who lets him
drive his BMW Z8. Sam drives me around
Kansas City in the Z8 because I am such an
excellent and worthy friend. The car in question
is a black, phallic, wasteful, overpriced and
sinful convertible, complete with a red leather
interior. I love it.
The Z8 bellows like a WWII fghter plane,
looks like it belongs in the 1950s and has a V8
engine that shows a Teutonic show of force.
All these aspects make it a perfect car for me,
a car-loving German who wishes cars would
revive to the styling of bygone eras.
As I mentioned before, this car is sinful.
It has exposed the aspects of my character I
previously had not known. Specifcally, it has
shown me that I am a sinful person. Although I
am not Catholic, I know of the religions most
reprehensible vices. They have come in handy
in categorizing my various evils.
When Im in the Z8, Im a different person.
I look at myself in the side-view mirror with
my hair blowing back and I know I would sleep
with myself on that given night.
Sometimes I think it might be the car I want
to sleep with because I fnd myself dressing
up whenever I know I will ride in it. Its like I
feel the car judging whether I am worthy to
sit on its red leather. Dressing up is simply a
precautionary measure, however, because I am
excessively handsome, clothed or not.
The EPA gave the Z8 a rating of 15 mpg.
Simply put, this car drinks like a German. Yet I
dont care how many penguins it kills or how
many childrens lungs it blackens because its all
worth it in my opinion. The thrills I get from this
car are far more gratifying than any experience
Ive had stumbling around in nature. It could be
said that the Z8 quickens the movement from
fossil fuels by burning them up, but I digress; this
is an essay about sins, not virtues.
As previously mentioned, this car is
overpriced. The $128,000 it takes to buy the
car could feed thousands of starving children.
Or you could buy a house. If you buy this
car, you do so with the knowledge that it is a
colossal waste.
This car will also depreciate faster than
former President Bushs popularity. The Kelley
Blue Book values a 2000 Z8 in excellent
condition at $65,000, which is less than half
the original price. All in all, I think its entirely
worth it.
When I ride in the Z8, I want to ride in
it everywhere. I have imagined a world where
everyone drives Z8s and never has to get out
of them. Everything we would need would be
in a drive-thru format. Our world would be
shaped by our laziness, and it would be perfect.
But these are simply idle daydreams, for not
everyone can afford a Z8. Nor does everyone
have such good friends who take them out in
them (see Pride).
Americans like to think they make fast cars.
However, when compared to the Z8s German
muscle, American cars cant keep up. Let me
recount one of the many street racing stories I
have accrued while riding in the Z8.
At a stoplight we pulled up next to a
Camaro SS, a reasonable opponent for the Z8.
I could tell it had been souped up from the
steady thumping of its exhaust. The driver of
the Camaro revved his engine and Sam revved
his in turn, and everyone involved knew the
race was on.
When the streetlight turned green, both
cars screeched their tires and sped off. When
the Z8 accelerates, it feels like angels are lifting
up my stomach and butt at the same time. In a
comfortable, not creepy, way. The Z8s top was
down, so the sound of the wind was deafening.
Lights became lines, like we were going into
hyperspace. By time we reached 90, the Camaro
was a shameful number of car lengths behind
us. The German part of me swelled with pride
and I patted the Z8s dashboard. Ah, this sin has
become a two-for-one.
When Sam and I drive in the Z8, we know
we are the top dogs of the road. The Z8 is
faster than almost any car on the road. This
gives us a let them eat cake mentality about
almost everything. I wish everyones car can go
as fast as the Z8. I wish everyone could look as
good as I do in the Z8. I wish everyone could
be as self-assured as I am in the Z8. Sadly, the
Z8 only seats two.
I drive a 1993 Honda Accord. Its air
conditioning is broken, its wheels are out of
alignment, its paint is coming off, and I cant shake
the notion that theres a carbon monoxide leak
in the cabin. I dont feel ashamed to have this
car, but when I see a sports car Id rather be
in, I feel a rush of envy. Sometimes Im able to
convince myself that sports cars are a waste,
but such solace is only short-lived because Ive
been in the Z8. I know the sins I experienced
with it will never be forgiven, nor do I want
them to be. JP
Graphic by Drew Stearns
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