You are on page 1of 16

october 27, 2011

life. and how to have one.
far from home
leaving the nest and moving away
to college is not always easy
baby on board
one jayplay writer’s transition
from student to motherhood
How coffee consumption improves your HealtH
caffiend benefits
october 27, 2011 | volume 9, issue 10
4 Kansas in heat
a heads up on head
13 facebooK funK
how the site can be deceptive
no place liKe home 5
leaving for college isn’t always fun
personal essay 15
from student to mother
* cover photo by chris bronson
EDITOR // Gabrielle Schock
DESIGNER // alex milbourn, max ayalla
CONTACT // bailey atkinSon, chriStine curtin, taylor lewiS
MANUAL // chriS neal., katie JameS
NOTICE // amanDa GaGe, naDia imaFiDon, matt Galloway
PLAY // Drew wille, JeFF karr, max GreenwooD
HEALTH // bre roach, chriSty nutt, kylie nutt
CONTRIBUTORS // michelle macbain, chance carmichael,
Dylan Derryberry, JaroD kilGore, lanDon mcDonalD, maGGie
younG, Savannah abbot
CREATIVE CONSULTANT // carol holSteaD, lucy Denyer
PAgE and your contributions
could be published!
The University Daily kansan
1000 Sunnyside Dr.
Lawrence, kS 66045
(785) 864-4810
SARAH CHAMP | aSSociate eDitor
at 16, when i started working part-time
at Starbucks, i hated coffee. i remember
writing in my “coffee passport” (an obligatory
part of training in which i sampled every
Starbucks brew) that every blend tasted like
the allure of all-you-can-drink double-
chocolate chip frappuccinos screamed “dream
job” to my 16-year-old self and convinced me to
sign up for a coffee shop job.
i took advantage of free beverages while
i worked, sticking to teas, the wannabe milk
shakes and whatever other non-coffee drinks
sounded good.
when customers asked for whole bean
recommendations, i always pushed the yukon
blend because i liked the bear on the package.
i just made up some sort of “it’s bold and rich”
description and added a “it pairs well with just
about anything” at the end.
anytime someone would order a black
coffee, i automatically dubbed them a badass.
i don’t remember that frst moment when
i willingly consumed espresso, but i know it
involved a lot of sugar, syrups and milk.
i never looked back.
Fast forward six years and now i drink
coffee on a daily basis — s ometimes twice a
day — even black (it doesn’t actually make you
a badass, but more so, just wonder how much
homework and sleep deprivation drove you to
prefer coffee black).
thanks to three years too long as a
Starbucks barista, i garnered a caffeine
addiction and a severe dislike for the crazies
in leawood. along with that addiction to coffee
has come an unfortunate immunity to the
effects of caffeine. i still drink it each day, but
whether it really provides me with any kind of
health beneft remains in question.
however, kylie’s feature on page eight
sheds light on some of the lesser known perks
of coffee consumption.
even if a cup (or three) of joe doesn’t give
me the same burst of energy it did when i was
16, i’ll still drink to its health benefts.
Mariscos M
& The Top Shelf Bar | 4821 W 6TH ST | 785-312-9057
c o me e x p e r i e n c e t h e
401 N 2ND ST | 785.842.0377 // 721 WAKARUSA | 785.843.0704
1/2 price
CATCH OF THE WEEK // kevin smith
> A weekly peek at a fsh in the KU sea.
HOW WE MET // natasha kothari & Glenn Dunne
> All great relationships had to start somewhere.
KANSAS iN HEAT // Fellatio Frustrations
> Tackling the sticky world of relationships.
HOw wOuld yOu wOw A girl ON A firsT
dATe?: if she’s a Kansas girl, then i guess i
would get her courtside seats at Allen field-
house. But she has to be a Kansas girl, other-
wise that wouldn’t work. if she’s not a Kansas
girl, then i would just have to hope that she’s
impressed by my intellect.
seCreT TAleNT: i’m convinced that i’m able
to dougie, although my friends aren’t so sure.
i just think i’m a lot better at doing it than my
if yOu COuld meeT ANyONe iN THe wOrld,
liviNg Or deAd, wHO wOuld iT Be?:
ernest Hemingway, hands down. i think he’s
an amazing writer. He met some good people,
wrote some good books, ate some good food,
and drank some good alcohol. i feel like he’d
have something profound to tell me or at least
pour me some beer.
wHy He’s A CATCH: i’m intelligent, i’m driven
and i have an easy smile.
sparks few when Natasha Kothari, a
junior from Overland Park, and glenn dunne,
a junior from leawood, met. literally.
Natasha had decided to use Nunemaker’s
oven to bake a cake in september 2009 while
glenn and some friends were playing cards in
an adjacent room.
The two, who lived in Templin, had briefy
met through mutual friends and thought the
other was cute, although they never admitted
it. “we didn’t know the other person liked us,
but all of our friends knew,” Natasha says.
But while Natasha was baking, she
accidentally dropped a potholder into the
oven and it burst into fames instantly. she
immediately ran upstairs to get help while
glenn observed the whole spectacle.
“[Natasha] had just come back from
getting her picture taken, and she was all
dressed up with a dress and heels,” glenn
says. “she just looked gorgeous.”
The oven fre marked a turn in their soon-
to-be relationship. After things calmed down,
the two spent the rest of the day together
with mutual friends. At the end of the day, a
friend took glenn aside and told him that he
needed to make his move on Natasha soon
i love blow jobs, but i’ve never climaxed
from one before. i’m not sure if my girlfriend
is doing it the wrong way or if it requires
more time (she usually does it for less than 5
minutes). what do you suggest?
Never assume a partner has experience in
the sexual act in which you are participating.
This might be your girlfriend’s frst time
giving a blow job. she may not have had
the opportunity to develop advanced oral
Never assume one technique will work
for every partner. every partner is different.
you may not want to hear this, but she may
have blown the socks off her last partner.
discovering and adapting to a new partner’s
likes, dislikes, and preferences is part of
sexual exploration. Are you certain everything
you’re doing is working?
Also, don’t assume your partner’s
experiences were always positive. she may
have negative associations with oral sex or
had a partner unwilling to explore satisfying
sex with her. make time and allow for the
development of trust in intimacy.
start off by expressing to your girlfriend
how much you enjoy giving and receiving oral
sex. Be enthusiastic and express your desire to
develop intimacy with her and to discover new
ways of satisfying each other.
follow this by asking her if you can do
anything else to improve her pleasure.
Hopefully, by opening up and allowing yourself
to be vulnerable, your girlfriend will engage in a
similar expression of desire to improve.
Opening up, both through communication
and physical actions, removing expectations
and being selfess are necessary for a healthy
and satisfying sexual relationship with your
Email any quEstions to
no topic is taboo.
because it was obvious they both liked each
other. The next day, two days shy of Natasha’s
19th birthday, he asked her out.
it’s been two years since then, but sparks
are still fying between Natasha and glenn,
and the infamous oven fre is still a source of
laughs for the couple. “i joked about the fre
with her for a while after that,” glenn says.
“And by joke,” Natasha responds,“he
means he gave me hell for it forever.”
Contributed photo
TurN-ONs:A girl with a unique look, like when
a girl has something really interesting going on,
but you can’t quite fgure out what it is.
TurN-Offs: if they don’t understand my humor,
that’s a huge turn-off. They can’t take anything
too seriously. if you take it too seriously, you
wouldn’t be able to understand my personality.
Contributed photo
Photo by Travis Young
A Fiery Start: Glenn really noticed Natasha
after she accidently started an oven fre.
Michelle MacBain is a graduate student from
Kansas City. She studied sexuality, psychology
and communication studies at Te University of
Kansas and Te University of Amsterdam.
Year: senior
Hometown: dekalb, ill.
Major: Political science
interested in: women
After a hard day of classes or your frst cold
of the year, a common need is parental sup-
port. When you realize that dorm food is ques-
tionable and you can’t eat pizza every night,
all you want is a home-cooked meal. These
are situations that most college students face.
Being homesick is extremely common among
students, however, arguably more diffcult for
out-of-state students with a longer drive home.
Students struggle when they frst move into
their new life and miss specifc things from
home. For some, these feelings don’t change
over the years.
Moving to college is exciting and terrifying
at once. An easy transition into college life is
a support system of friends from high school.
This is more diffcult for out-of-state students
with few classmates that go to the same
school, like Doug Dawson, a freshman from
Austin, Texas. “There was only one other girl
that came from my high school from my gradu-
ating class,” Dawson says. “We don’t have a
class together so I never really see her.”
If a student comes to college with few
friends it is imperative that they get involved
with groups on campus says John Wade, li-
censed psychologist and outreach coordinator
at the University’s Counseling and Psycho-
logical Services. According to the Student
Involvement and Leadership Center there
are 559 groups available at KU and these can
include anything from religious groups, Greek
life and groups related to majors.
Finding a support system of new friends is
helpful but does not solve the problem. Wade
stresses that the adjustment of college takes
time. “I think people often expect the frst
couple weeks to be hard, but it goes on longer
than they expected in their minds and it starts
to feel problematic” he says.
Keeping in contact with home is helpful.
Wade says it’s OK to call home more often
early on in the semester to get that extra sup-
Amanda Bucher, a junior from Omaha, talks
to her mother often to get updates of what is
going on with the family. Bucher misses when
her family gets together and watching her
sister grow up. Bucher has always helped her
sister get ready for school dances but could
not this year due to a confict with the Univer-
sity’s homecoming. “I used to do her hair and
makeup and take pictures at the group stuff,”
Bucher says.
The feeling of homesickness is not just for
freshman. Over the years, older students still
feel homesick. For Bess Drum, a senior from
Los Angles, this feeling has increased each
year. As a freshman, Drum was so excited
about meeting new people and living in a dif-
ferent place that she didn’t have time to think
about home. “Now it seems like I have more
time to think about the future and that includes
fnding a place to live and a job,” Drum says.
“Now that I am settled at KU with my aca-
demic and social life, I think about the bigger
Parents also struggle with their children
leaving as much as students do. Rita Drum,
Bess’ mother, fnds it diffcult talking to her
daughter on the phone. “Sometimes your kids
sound one way on the phone and you don’t
know what’s going on behind the scenes,”
Rita says. She also says that it’s diffcult to tell
whether her daughter is stressed or busy from
school, is having a bad day or is homesick. The
two don’t always have the desired time to talk
on the phone so they resort to text messaging.
A lack of communication with parents can
add stress and increase the feeling of being
Students go through a roller coaster of feel-
ings while being at school. Homesickness is a
common feeling among students who are miles
from home or down the street.
GoinG AwAy To colleGe isn’T AlwAys Fun
No Place
lIke HoMe
Photo by Ashleigh Lee
Family Ties: Amanda Bucher, a junior from Omaha, Neb., holds a picture of her family. She
says she talks with family often, but misses helping her younger sister get ready.
You know You are homesick if:
• You would do anything for your
favorite meal your mother makes
• The background of your phone is
one of your pets
• You listen to your hometown radio
station online
• You check the weather of
your hometown
• You are craving a local restaurant
from home
• Your planner or calendar has
multiple “going home” posts on it
• Everyone from home is on
speed dial
• You have a countdown until a
break from school
• You still wear t-shirts with your
high school’s name
• Keep up with your high school
sports and events
• You have more than two
pictures of your family in your room
KU by the nUmbers:
- Percent of students from Kansas: 69.1
- Other states represented at KU: 50
- International Students: 2,093 from 109
— Source:
> If you’re going to do it, be smart.
It’s not until you’ve closed your laptop that
you realize you’ve been staring at it for three
hours. The time few by, but the illuminated
rectangle has kept you sucked in with your nose
nearly rubbing against the screen.
Students use their computers for taking
notes, watching videos, studying and social
networking. There anything that you can’t ac-
complish on the computer, which is exactly why
staring at your computer for hours at a time con-
tinues to get a bad rap. New studies are starting
to show that many kids suffer from uncorrected
eye disorders due to staring at the screen.
According to Jim Sheedy, optometrist at
Pacifc University in Portland, some kids may
experience what eye doctors are referring to as
the three Ds: discomfort, dizziness and lack of
depth. Sheedy notes that if you are encounter-
ing these problems, you may suffer from “3-D
vision syndrome.” Sitting the computer at least
18 inches from your face and using an overhead
lamp can be a few ways to prevent this from
Problems don’t just occur with eyesight. For
some students, the discomfort can come in the
form of neck and back pain. Adam Herpolsheim-
er, a senior from Wichita, lies on his back while
on his computer. “After being on my back long
enough, it aches for awhile even after a position
change,” Herpolsheimer says.
With more people experiencing nags when
engaging with a computer screen, Sheedy says
he believes the computer will eventually need
to adapt to better accomodate humans.
Photo by Bre Roach
Staring Contest: Looking at your computer
screen for an extended amount of time can
have severe efects on your eyes and back.
(Additional $1 service fee will apply)
Grammy and Academy Award-winning icon of
modern music in a sensational solo performance!
ORDER TODAY s 785-864-2787
Sponsored by:
The Perks of Coffee
sTUdiEs show ThE bEnEFiTs coFFEE cAn hAvE on hEAlTh
Four days a week, while Gena Pollack works at cupcake construction on
Massachusetts street, she drinks an 8 to 12 ounce cup of coffee between 7 and 8 a.m.
Pollack, a senior from Tulsa, okla., needs her morning brew. her new favorite coffee is a
pomegranate-infused black coffee from signs of life, just down the block from her work,
but Pollack enjoys switching up where she buys her brew and what favors she drinks.
she is particular about her coffee too. “if it’s bad, then it’s going to make me mad,”
she says. “it’s going to ruin my morning.”
because october is Pollack’s busiest month with writing papers, taking tests and
working at her job 30-35 hours a week, she ends up drinking more coffee to keep her
going. Pollack can spend up to $50 a week on coffee, which means at least one in the
morning and one in the afternoon.
Although Pollack loves her coffee, she says she tries to make conscious decisions
when drinking it, not only for her bank account, but for her health. having an increased
heart rate from coffee also bothers Pollack often.
America is full of coffee drinkers. ninety percent of the U.s. adult population consumes
coffee, and 81 percent of caffeine consumption comes from coffee, says Michel lucas,
professor in the department of nutrition at the harvard school of Public health.
According to a number of studies, coffee can have several health benefts. studies
have shown that coffee can lower the risk of depression, the amount of pain while
exercising, and the risk of Type 2 diabetes. That daily cup of Joe may not be that vice
people once thought it was.
last month, the harvard school of Public health released a study that said coffee
can reduce the risk of depression in women. This is the largest study that put coffee and
depression together, says lucas, who is also did research for the study.
The study followed 50,739 U.s. women with a mean age of 63 who were free from
depression at the start of the study in 1996. it found that women who drank four or more
cups of coffee per day reduced their risk of depression by 20 percent. when two to three
cups of coffee were drunk, the risk was reduced by 15 percent, lucas says.
one in fve Americans is affected by depression, according to the centers for disease
control and Prevention. Feelings of hopelessness, guilt, loss of interest in activities or
hobbies that were once pleasurable, and decreased energy can indicate depression.
but women are two times more likely to get depression than men, lucas says. A common
explanation for this is hormonal changes, causing girls to be at a higher risk.
The type of coffee a woman drinks doesn’t matter as long as it contains caffeine.
“we cannot assume that it is caffeine or coffee, but [the study] suggests that,” lucas
says. other studies have been conducted at harvard to determine if various caffeinated
beverages, such as tea and soda, have the same effect. “we didn’t see any relationship
with non-coffee sources of caffeine, mainly because the intake is not enough,” he says.
decaffeinated coffee shows the same results.
“drinking coffee is not bad for your health; it’s more of a beneft,” lucas says.
Especially if you are already a coffee drinker. The effects have not been studied yet on
men or young women. “so, it would be interesting to see if we can observe the same kind
of relationship,” he says.
Tyler weiland, a junior from waterville, says he drinks at least one coffee in the
mornings and sometimes another in the afternoon when he needs a “pick-me-up.” “The
caffeine helps me get up and get ready for class and stuff like that in the mornings,” he
says. before drinking a coffee, weiland says he is less talkative and more subdued.
Janani Ganta, a sophomore from Manhattan, says she drinks one coffee during the
weekday afternoons when she is the most exhausted. since Ganta works several 3 a.m.
to 7 a.m. security shifts at the residence halls, she is ready to crash halfway through the
day. when Ganta has her afternoon coffee she says, “i can actually get through the day.
And if i don’t have it, i’m just dead. i can’t do this.”
Pollack, weiland and Ganta each need caffeinated coffee to get them through the day
and put them in a good mood. but not only have studies shown coffee and caffeine can
help reduce the risk of depression but they can also reduce pain while exercising.
Every afternoon during the school week, Jennifer Farr makes a trip to her apartment
How much caffei ne do you need
to reduce muscl e pai n?
Since Motl’s study says each person needs 4 milligrams
of caffeine per kilogram of body weight, follow the steps
below to see how much caffeine you need:
1 kilogram = 2.2046 pounds
•Divide your weight by the above pounds
•This is what you weigh in kilograms
•Take this number and multiply by four
•The number you end up with is the number of
milligrams of caffeine you need
For example, if someone weighs 160 pounds, take:
•160 pounds divided by 2.2064 pounds
•This equals 72.53 kilograms
•Multiply 72.53 kilograms by 4 milligrams
for her caffeine fx – a home-brewed Columbian blend coffee with a little
French vanilla creamer. Farr, a senior from Overland Park, says once
it’s noon, she is ready for a hot cup of coffee because it wakes her up
again and gets her pumped for her spinning and weights classes she has
Farr knows coffee improves her mood for when she exercises, but she
may not realize what else the coffee is doing while she peddles her bike.
Two years ago, the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign released
a study that said an increase in caffeine intake reduces the amount of pain
experienced when exercising. Twenty-four college-age men were split
into two groups. Half of the men’s everyday caffeine consumption was
less than 100 milligrams, which is less than a can of Coca-Cola, and the
other half consumed more than 400 mg every day, which is between three
to four cups of coffee, says Robert Motl, a researcher of the study.
The study showed caffeine was associated with the reduction of
muscle pain. The effect did not differ between those who were low- and
high-users of caffeine Motl says, who is a professor in the department of
Kinesiology and Community Health at the University of Illinois at Urbana-
Champaign. The men’s heart rate and oxygen levels did not differ when
consuming caffeine versus a placebo, which means the caffeine did not
have a negative effect while exercising.
Caffeine works to lessen pain by blocking adenosine receptors, which
stimulate pain in the spinal chord and brain. When the receptors are
blocked, which is what the caffeine does, then there is less pain, Motl
“A Starbucks tall with a shot of espresso might get you there,” he says.
Motl recommends drinking caffeine before working out because if you
experience less pain and if you don’t like pain, then you may be able to get
to the gym more regularly.
Type 2 diabetes is a disorder where the cells of the body become
resistant to insulin, which is a hormone, produced by the pancreas, says
Jim Lane, a professor of medical psychology at Duke University Medical
Center. The pancreas helps transport the glucose from the blood into the
cells where it burns as fuel. Since the cells become resistant, the pancreas
needs to produce more insulin to overcome the resistance. Eventually, the
pancreas cannot produce enough insulin and that is when glucose levels
rise in the blood and remain abnormally high.
About 215,000 Americans who are 20-years-of-age and younger have
type 2 diabetes, but it is most prevalent among Americans who are aged
65 and older, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
The distribution of type 2 diabetes is shifting toward younger people
because childhood obesity is on the rise.
Although these three studies show coffee and caffeine have benefts
on health, drinking too much can have negative short-term effects.
Coffee can cause sleeplessness, stress, and you can become physically
dependent on it, Lane says. This means if you miss a day of drinking coffee
you can experience caffeine withdrawals, which can result in tiredness,
grogginess, and headaches.
Because many people do enjoy the effects caffeine has on them, it
is perfectly fne to drink coffee as long as it doesn’t cause them trouble,
Lane says. Many people live stressful lives, so they wind up drinking a lot
of coffee to meet deadlines and stay up.
Determining the optimal amount of coffee to drink depends on each
person because everyone differs in their response to caffeine. “These very
individual differences and variations mean that we can’t really prescribe a
certain amount like one cup is fne or two cups is fne,” Lane says.
This equals 290 miligrams of caffeine needed
to reduce muscle pain.
Brew and You:
Besides perking
you up, cofee
ofers several health
benefts, such as
reducing depression
and the intensity of
Photo Illustrations by
Chris Bronson
The Intergalactic
Live-action graphic n c ovel performed in multimedia format
Sponsored by
s #OSTUME #ONTEST WITH 0RIZes: Pegistration begins at 6pm, Kemper FoyeR MAIN LOBBY
Costume categories: Children / KU Student / Adult
s 0RE0ERFORMANCE $ISCUssion on the Art ol Graphic Novel lllustration,
6:30pm, Lied Center Pavilion
· Post·Perlormance Collee and Conversation, Lied Center Pavilion
?85·864·2?8? ORDER TODAY AA
Find out more: and
(Additional S1 service lee will apply)
Q: How did you come up with the name of your
A: We named the band after an Australian out-
law back in the 1800s. He was really poor so he
robbed banks. We just thought it was a really
cool name.
Q: How would you describe your newest album
Good Luck and True Love? How is it different
from past albums?
A: It’s a classic record with killer sound. It’s
kind of a combination of country and rock. Ev-
erything on the album is all played by the band
because we didn’t have anyone else play on it.
It’s what we sound like live, and it is different
from our last album. Our last one (Somewhere
in Time) was a tribute to one of our heroes and
a great songwriter, Pinto Bennet. This new al-
bum is all original songs.
Q: How long have you been singing?
A: Pretty much my whole life. My dad is a musi-
cian and my brothers and I grew up playing in
his band when we were kids. So pretty much
for 30 years.
Q: Where is the strangest place you have ever
written lyrics?
A: I don’t know if this is strange, but one of the
coolest places I have ever written is on this
cliff in California overlooking the ocean. When I
write, I like to take trips and just go somewhere
for three or four days, turn my phone off, and go
camping in the woods.
Q: What is the most rewarding part of being a
A: Oh I think it’s the traveling all over the place,
and seeing a lot of stuff. You get to meet people,
see a lot of cool places and do a lot of things
that not very many other people get to do.
Q: What is the most challenging part of being
a musician?
A: Keeping everyone on the road happy. Some
of the guys have wives or girlfriends, and it is
hard being away from home so much. That is
defnitely the most challenging part.
Q: What song would you say is the soundtrack
to your life?
A: Probably the song on our newest album “Hit
the Ground Running”. It is about being on the
road and if you listen to it, you can see that it is
pretty autobiographical.
Q: If you were given a day to have any other
career, what would it be?
A: I would be a carpenter. My grandpa was a
carpenter, and I grew up helping him with proj-
ects. He taught me how to build so many things.
It’s probably one of the only other things I am
qualifed to do.
Q: Have you ever been to Lawrence?
A: Yeah, we have played at The Bottleneck a
few times over the years. It is a nice little town
with good bars and bookstores. We have a re-
ally good time.
Q: What advice do you have for college stu-
dents aspiring to be musicians?
A: Do it for two weeks and then quit. That’s a
joke, but it is tough. There are so many ways
to get into it, but the only good advice I have
is practice, do your homework, and make sure
you listen to the old stuff before you go out and
start playing gigs. Listening to the old stuff is
> Because we have questions, celebrities have answers.
Reckless Kelly is an Austin, Texas based country band with a rock vibe that sets them apart
from other run of the mill country bands. Led by brothers, Cody and Willy Braun, the fve-person
band formed in 1996, and they have already put out nine albums. Their most recent album Good
Luck and True Love came out this September.
All of the new songs are either written or co-written by lead singer Willy Braun. All of the new
songs are about a range of subjects from being on the road (“Hit the Ground Running”) to music
in general (“New Moon Over Nashville”) to heartbreak (“I Never liked St. Valentine”). The band
strives to make each album better than the last, playing every instrument in each song to create
the live sound of fve musicians jamming to their music. Jayplay talked to frontman Willy Braun to
get students excited about their upcoming concert at The Bottleneck on Nov. 1.
Contributed Photo
Reckless Determination: Te boys of Pretty Reckless will play Te Bottleneck on Nov. 1. (From left to right: Willy Braun, Cody Braun, Chris Schelske, David Abeyta and Jay Nazz)
dr eams can come t r ue.
now open unt i l 3am.
( 785) 843- 8650 or ( 785) 841- 7096
1410 Kasol d St . A13
Bob Bi l l i ngs & Kasol d
JadeGar denOnl i ne. com
M: 11am- 10pm
T/ W/ Su: 11am- 12pm
Th/ F/ Sa: 11am- 3am
9am – 2am
601 Kasold
Lawrence, KS
785-841-TACO | 1115 MASS
(785) 856.6969 RBARPATIO 610 FLORIDA ST.
You log onto Facebook after a hard day. You
scored badly on the paper you slaved over,
your boyfriend dumped you or you’ve had a
whole series of frustrating events. You scroll
down your news feed and see the status of
the annoying girl you knew from high school:
“Just got a fabulous Chanel bag from my boy,
can’t wait to show it off!” Suddenly your blood
pressure rises and you feel even worse. Sound
It’s easy to get sucked into the trap of in-
terpreting all of your friends’ chipper posts,
smiling pictures and excited statuses as dull
in comparison to your own life. Facebook’s
design even encourages positivity, by having
features such as the “Like” button without a
corresponding “Hate” button.
Research shows that the easy ability to
make comparisons on Facebook affects our
mental health in a negative way. A recent
Stanford University study found that Facebook
causes us to underestimate our friends’ nega-
tive and unhappier posts, and to overestimate
their positive, happier posts. This makes us to
feel defeated and as if we don’t have what it
takes to reach our own goals or to be as lucky
or attractive as our friends on Facebook.
Initially we think about how excited we
are for that person, but then the after-effect of
those thoughts sink in as we wish we were as
lucky or privileged as them. As glamorous as
we can make other people’s lives out to be, Fa-
cebook users should understand that there’s a
little fbbing going on.
Facebook can be used as a salve for self-
esteem issues, or a quick-fx in a way, says
Susan Newman, social psychologist and rela-
tionship expert. “On Facebook you can build
yourself up into the person you would like to be
and you don’t have to reveal anything negative
or upsetting.”
The tools Facebook provides can be the per-
fect palette to create a surface version of you.
You’re able to convince strangers that you are
a fashionista, get stellar grades on everything
or are always going to the next big concert.
“I think because Facebook is so open, its
users are its editors. They can edit their life in
whatever way they want,” Jahmal Clemons, a
senior from Wichita, says. “And if you take the
pictures and statuses at face value, you may
get a whole different idea of a person than
when you actually have a conversation with
Creating a façade can be alluring, especially
because Facebook isn’t the physical world. On
Facebook, what you see is what you get. You
can guide someone’s perception of you with a
single click.
Sebastian Valenzuela, assistant professor
in the School of Communications at Catho-
lic University of Chile, concurs. He says that
you’re defning your personality on Facebook
and you can revamp yourself and your image.
“People craft personalities on Facebook who
want to become more popular to compensate
the lack of popularity and connectedness that
they encounter in their offine face-to-face
world,” says Valenzuela, who has been a part
of a research team conducting fve different
studies on how Facebook affects us.
Even though we have a tendency to exag-
gerate about our lives, whether we’re doing the
exaggerating or witnessing it, it has an effect
on us.
Bailey Proctor, a freshman from Overland
Park, says that she once felt discouraged when
she was sick while her friends were out having
fun and she saw things they would post.
“Whenever I see an excited status I’m hap-
py for them, but if I’m not feeling the same, I
might post a sad lyric or something to get their
attention,” Proctor says.
In addition to focusing more on yourself, Dr.
Newman says that people should focus on Fa-
cebook as a vehicle for keeping up with class-
es and upcoming assignments, communicating
with professors and fnding jobs, as well as us-
ing it as a networking tool to stay connected
to friends and family. “Reduce the amount of
weight you give to what is posted by others on
Facebook,” Newman says. “Realize that some
puffery may be going on.”
Whether stomaching a princess-esque sta-
tus update or gushing about a new installment
in your own life, remind yourself that people do
see what you write online and that you have
the power to be your best self, despite all the
Make light of statuses and learn to laugh a little:
It’s easy with some statuses to look beyond comparison and just plain laugh. “If it’s a friend, I make
fun of them for sometimes posting private stuff, but if I don’t know them then I usually just laugh
and keep scrolling,” says Nicole Leighty, a junior from Andover. The fact of the matter is that it can
be a confdence-booster to make light of others’ outrageous status updates.
Laugh-worthy statuses:
“I don’t mean to be selfsh, but I picture myself getting paid!” – Anonymous

“Is it Thursday yet?! Yay for Mexicoooo” – Anonymous
“MANHATTAN FOR KG’S 21ST!!!!! &#(@#*$(****000!#$@” – Anonymous
“LICENSE one day JOB the next!!!!” – Anonymous
“When you have so much stuff in your shopping bag that your car thinks there is a person sitting
in the passenger seat and you have to buckle your bag in.” – Anonymous
Don’t Let Facebook Get You Down
The site that sucks you in and
gives you the tools to compare
Photo illustration by Jessica Janasz
Un-friend Poor Self-esteem: Not taking Facebook behavior seriously helps keep your confdence up.
> New places, new faces.
> Feel free to swoon.
Clinton Ricketts will open as part of a Final
Friday event on Oct. 28 at 6 p.m. Anyone
interested in art for the sake of art is
encouraged to attend.
In Greek, “poema” means beautiful
masterpiece. According to 19-year-old singer,
songwriter and guitarist, Elle Puckett, that’s all
she and her sister Shealeen, 21, hope their new
record will become.
The sisters started performing 10 years ago
at their dad’s birthday party for fun. Seven years
passed and music continued to be just a hobby,
until it became a career in 2008 when they
landed a record deal with Tooth & Nail Records,
a record label in Seattle.
Currently, Poema is recording its second
studio album in Los Angeles. After LA, they’re
hitting the road and stopping in Kansas City
on Nov. 8 at The Clubhaus, 5800 Madison Dr.,
Kansas City, Mo.
According to Elle and Shealeen, this album
is full of specifc life stories, unlike their frst
album, Sing It Now, which they say was more
generic. “The frst album was more about songs
that didn’t apply to us,” Elle says. “There’s a new
song called ‘Playing with Fire.’ It’s metaphorical.
A boy is fre and it’s about how you should know
better than to mess with trouble.”
Elle says this song is her favorite on the new
album and it’s more relative to her stage in life.
“A lot of the songs are really personal,”
Shealeen, Poema’s singer and pianist, says.
“My favorite song is the one we wrote for our
grandma, ‘My Turn to Go.’ It’s about growing up
and the memories we had with her.”
As the girls continue to grow, so do their life
experiences. Some of these slices of life you
can experience too, through the songs on their
upcoming album, available early next year. To
fnd out more about Poema, visit PoemaOffcial.
Contributed Photo
Beautiful Music: Sisters Elle and Shealeen Puck-
ett make up the duo Poema. Teir sophomore
album debuts early next year.
For a long time, Lawrence has been
notorious for breeding creativity in a variety
of different forms. Nowhere is this creativity,
and the fostering thereof, more evident than
at locally owned art galleries such as the
Invisible Hand.
The Invisible Hand Gallery features artwork
from local and regional artists. It’s located at
801 1/2 Massachusetts Street, at the end of an
inexplicably creaky hallway directly above La
Esquina. It’s about as big as a modest bedroom.
“The space is really different. It’s really
small,” says Adam Smith, owner and director
of Invisible Hand gallery. Invisible Hand
functions as a gallery, a custom frame shop,
and it features professional level printing
Smith, who does all the curating for
Invisible Hand, builds most the frames for the
Lawrence Art Center, and is committed to
introducing new art to the city of Lawrence. “I
try to have new artists that haven’t been shown
a lot in Lawrence every month. I try to expose
new artists to our community,” he says. “I’m
showing a lot of contemporary cutting edge
The gallery itself is open Tuesday through
Saturday from 12 to 5 p.m. It currently features
photographs by Mark Luce, a Kansas City-
based photographer.
“Silver and Gold, New and Old,” a
collection of works by University graduate
Contributed Photo
Hidden Artifacts: Tiny art gallery Invisble
Hand features local works, including the
upcoming Final Friday event “Silver and
Gold, New and Old.”
For Her
I arrived to my advising appointment 10 min-
utes early and quietly peeked into the offce. In-
side a student sat with another adviser chatting
about her future. My adviser was busy typing at
her computer, so I straightened my loose dress
and took a seat in the waiting area. I had made it
almost three months into the semester without
anyone noticing my swollen body. It was not that
I was ashamed, but it was refreshing to have
school as the one place in my life where I could
forget about the uncertainty of everything.
“Well, I didn’t even see you come in. Please
come, have a seat,” Lynn Tidwell said to me.
I had met with Tidwell several times while
attending the University of Kansas. She had a
reputation for being the best adviser. She never
missed a tricky loop in the system or forgot to
count those precious double dip credits. She
treated her profession like an art, carefully ma-
neuvering the pieces, ftting your credits togeth-
er and showing all the possible options until, at
last, your future was settled with a cohesive
plan. Even though I was afraid of confronting
my plan, something about her was comforting.
Tidwell and I greeted each other and then
got down to business.
“I printed off your credit form and it looks
like you only have a few more classes before
graduation, Tidwell said. “What would you like
to look at today?”
I took a breath and looked over at the other
student in the offce, then turned my attention
back to Tidwell.
“I will be taking some time off school, and
before I go I want to have some sort of plan for
when I return,” I said. I could see the question
at the tips of Tidwell’s squinted eyes.
“I’m pregnant. I’m going to have a baby in
October and plan on taking a year off school to
stay at home with my baby,” I said. It felt good
to say it. But something in the reality of the situ-
ation unexpectedly hit my gut leaving a sharp-
ness in my throat. My eyes felt dry, like the quiet
before the storm.
If Tidwell was shocked, she played it off
“Well congratulations! A baby, that’s great.
We will fgure out a plan for you. We are going
to make this work.” Her words were sincere.
She was upbeat and optimistic. Then she went
to work. She counted credits, double-checked
class levels and made sure I met all the re-
quirements. I gazed over her shoulder follow-
ing her pencil marks. I was 18 credits shy of
I was close enough that giving up wasn’t
an option, but I couldn’t help but feel defeated.
All my hard work up to this point couldn’t be
in vain, could it? Were those sleepless nights
of studying all for nothing? What about the
daunting pile of debt waiting to be repaid? Not
to mention my dreams, my future, my worthi-
I was afraid to blink, afraid to breathe.
Tidwell looked at me. I tried to give her a
little smile, but the muscles in my cheeks were
tight, working hard to control my emotions. All
I could manage was a slight twitch at the cor-
ner of my lips.
“Look, look. If you get this class out of the
way next summer, then you can fnish in a year
being part time,” she said without doubt. “You
can do this. Just take it slow and steady.”
Something in her words gave me a glimpse
of hope. I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but mothers
fnd a way to do it all the time.
The muscles in my cheeks loosened enough
for me to fash a half-hearted smile.
“You are going to graduate, and your baby
will be waiting to see you walk down the hill on
commencement. I’ll even knit her a Jayhawk
hat,” Tidwell said.
The absurdity of this made me laugh. I never
expected my adviser to actually knit my child a
hat, but now I was beginning to believe that I
might graduate.
I left the offce thanking Tidwell and made
my way to the back door of the building. I sat on
a concrete block alone with my thoughts. The
suppressed tears welled in my eyes. It wasn’t
supposed to happen like this. You were suppose
to graduate college, fnd a career, get married
and then have a baby. Not start college, get
pregnant, and then engaged. The tears began
to fow. I reached in my backpack and grabbed
my phone. I dialed my fancé’s number desper-
ate to fnd comfort, to hear somebody tell me it
would be all right.
Right before I entered the call, a butterfy
ripple stirred in my belly. It wasn’t a turn of emo-
tions, but the faintest proof of existence from
the tiny baby growing inside me. I put the phone
down and cupped my belly. Something else in-
side me shifted with the movement. With one
hand still resting on my belly, I dried my tears
and took a deep breath. It was time to come to
terms with my life, time for me to be the strong
It would be diffcult, but I would graduate.
Not for me, not in hopes of becoming a journal-
ist in a big city, but for her. I would graduate
so that I could get a professional desk job that
offered insurance for her. I would graduate so
that one day I could honestly tell her that she
can do anything she put her mind to.
Contributed Photo
How a routine advising appointment helped
one Jayplay writer fnd her inner strength
and face her changing role as a mother
Motherly Love: Christy holds her 10-month-old daughter Miriam Te picture was taken during Christy’s frst full semester back at the University
after having her daughter.
UDK Ad Staff DOMINATED the News Staff in softball!
Wanna brag? Submit some pics>
$1.00 All Cans Including Rolling
Rock & $4.25 Double Wells
$2.00 Domestic Bottles
$4.00 Double Skyy
$2.00 Single Wells
$1.50 PBR Bottles
$2.75 Import Bottles,
Specialty Beers &
Boulevard Wheat Draws
$5.00 Double Absolut
$4.75 Domestic (Premium)
Pitchers, $3.75 PBR/Nattie
Pitchers, $5.00 Double Goose
$5.25 Domestic (Premium)
Pitchers, $3.75 PBR/Nattie
Pitchers, $3.50 Double Wells
$5.25 Domestic (Premium)
Pitchers, $3.75 PBR/Nattie
Pitchers, $3.50 Double Wells
All wines by the bottle - $20
All wines by the glass - $5
House infused liquors - $3 -
doubles $4.75
$2 off all martinis
$4.75 double bloody marys
with our house infused hot
pepper vodka, $4 Mimosas
Mimosas & Bloody Marys - $3
Sunday Brunch 'til 4 p.m.
Summer Brew - $3.50
$1 off Lump Crab Melt
Mariscos Infusions - $4.50
$1 off Shrimp Tacos
Half Price Martinis
$1 off Veal Meatball Grinder
Margaritas - $3.50
Top Shelf Margaritas - $5
Select Tequila Flights (tres)
- $9
$1 off Prime Rib Sliders
Local Draft Beer - $3
$1 off Fish N Chips
Wine by the Glass - $1 off
$5.00 off All Large Pizza
60oz. Domestic Pitchers -
Mexican Beers $3.00
Jose Cuervo (Gold or Silver)
Margaritas $5.00
6.99 Chicken Strip Platter
Domestic Big Beers – $4.00
Double Smirnoff’s - $4.00
$2.00 off All Burgers
Miller/Coors Bottles - $2.50
Double Bacardi’s – $4.00
“Local Night” Free State &
Boulevard Pints - 3.50
Clear 10 Drinks - $3.50
$10.99 ½ Slab Rib Platter
Miller/Coors Pints - $3.00
Bacardi Bombs – $4.00
$2.50 Miller Lite and Coors Light
pints and $ 3.50 bloody marys
$2 Miller Lite and coors
light pints and $1 tacos
$3 domestic big beers and
$2 single topping slices $2
Single-topping slices after 9
$2.50 domestic bottles
$3 Boulevard pints and $3
UV vodka singles
$3 UV singles
Johnny’s Tavern West
721Wakarusa Suite 100
Johnny’s Tavern North
401N2nd St
$6 domestic pitchers
$ 7.99 chicken fried steak
w/ mashed potatoes & gravy
with green beans
$ 5 off any pizza (after 6 pm)
Mariscos M
&The Top Shelf Bar
$5.19 “White” Slices
$5.99 Buffalo chicken dip
Sam Adams Boston Lager &
Seasonal Pints - $4.00
All Bottled Beer: $2.00
Big 22 oz. Domestic Draft
Beers: $3.00
Jumbo Rocks Margaritas:
Lime Mug O’ Ritas: 99¢
12 oz. Domestic Draft Beers
including Boulevard Wheat:
1/2 Price House Margaritas
Carlos GoldMargaritas $4.99
Jumbo Margaritas & Long
Island Iced Tea: $4.99