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30 Days of IT Haiku

by Brian K Vagnini

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This was born out of an idea to write a haiku every day for a year. The new job sort of prevented that, but I did wind up with 30 days worth. Some days, I wrote two or three; other days, I didn't write at all. I hope you enjoy this weird little book. I had a lot of fun coming up with something for each day, once I got started. Brian

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­Service call­

It does not work right Hello This is Tech support How can I help you

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­Password reset­

crap what is it now? can't remember my password it's been changed, good bye

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­Rush Job­

I need this by noon but its eleven thirty don't care just do it

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­Not My Fault­

dammit, Greg call me Internet is down again add the routes back, please

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­Happy User­

Thank you so, so much I have my two screens again Working on project

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­Priorities­

Now it's code monkey Then it's network monkey time ping pong is so fun

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­Programming­

beat head against wall chasing down missing colon dammit I hate code

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­Code Hell­

It still doesn't work Server 500 error God I hate coding

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­Weekend­

reading up on code deadline approaching real soon must get code to work

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­Reading Code Books­

reading through books again method still doesn't work right turn to chapter four

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­Breakthrough­

found missing bracket database insert works now happy dance in chair

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­Crisis­

email server down it is an emergency oh wait, it's just me

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­Restore­

I can't find the file... Let me do folder restore is that the one? Nope

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­No Code Day­

new user accounts taking care of issues now next, email from form

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­Firewall­

client connection dropped VPN doesn't work right please, status advise

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­Virus?­

laptop acting wierd maybe virus infection? I'll clean it right now

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­Email from Form­

form processes now need confirmation email must update server

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­Database Retrieval­

query works right now output data in table success is so close

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­Email from Form pt2­

email from form works just a little bit more now then it is complete

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­Excel Files­

I need Excel file Let me connect to SQL Now, click on Refresh

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­Friday­

too many issues knocking them all out today ready to go home

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­Accounts­

They don't work here now I will disable accounts email access locked

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­Installation­

grab Linux CD need new virtual machine use virtual box

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­Meeting with Users­

Let us discuss this I want to do a project Now, What do we need?

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­Notice­

Gave 2 weeks notice Ready to start the new job Want to go right now

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­VPN­

VPN Issues Yes, We made bad decision Working on it now

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­Lab Setup­

went on a field trip set up a new coding lab evrything works right

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­Contract­

Good news during lunch it's official, Contract signed so ready to start

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­Cleanup­

Server died last night Trying to finish projects Swap power supply

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­Ready To Go­

Updating my team Here are my notes and number Now, Doing nothing

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­Under The Weather­

Made it in to work 1 0 pounds crap in 5 pound bag Went back home to sleep

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­Last Day­

Made it in on time Did backups for the last time Hey, Is it 5 yet?

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About the Author

Brian K. Vagnini is a writer, musician and designer. He has published several books in a series about the Ash family, with at least two more in the works. In addition, he writes technical material on two blogs (wicketbang.com and 01 f4.com) and is working on two technical books, tentatively titled "The Modern Website" (based on wicketbang.com blog content) and "virtual.companies". He has contributed several articles to Lifehack.org as well. When not writing, he plays bass guitar, drums and guitar. He is also learning Spanish so he can speak with an additional half a billion people worldwide. He lives in Tallahassee, FL with his wife, son, two Jack Russell Terriers and nine chickens (and yes, most of them have names.) He has a Bacon number of 3. Visit him online at greymatterideas.com 35