PASTOR’S MARRIAGE Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled, but fornicators and adulterers God will

judge. (Heb 13:4) Ever tried asking a single sister what kind of man she wants for a husband? A very common answer you are bound to get is “a God fearing man”. The second consideration may be money and not the other way round. By extension, but for fear of the responsibilities of the wife of a man of God, almost all ladies would love to marry a pastor. In some churches, it is a major prerequisite that a believer be first married before he is promoted to the office of a pastor. Due to preference of pastors as husband prospects by majority of sisters, some churches went further to forbid a pastor from marrying from his parish. Did they foresee the life drama that took place in one popular church in Nigeria when the pastor lost his wife? This successful pastor, still in his late thirties lost his wife to HIV unknown to the church members and most eligible single sisters who were scheming to become his wife. Christians are fond of confirming God’s approval of their marriage partners through dreams. God speaks to us through dreams but to a Christian who is yet to mature in the things of the Lord, dreams at night could arise from the activities of the mind during the day. If a sister preoccupies her mind fantasizing about marrying her pastor for instance, she will definitely see herself getting married to the pastor in the dream. There was serious confusion in the church of this man of God as sisters upon sisters approached him for counseling but ended up sharing with him how they saw themselves getting married to him in one dream or revelation. The man of God knew he had to do something very fast before the entire work of God in his hands goes up in flames. The pastor was very committed to a fellowship of people living with HIV/AIDS he help to set up when they first discovered that the wife was HIV positive and he by extension was also infected. How the wife contracted HIV was unknown but she contracted whilst they were still in the world. They got married as unbelievers. The pastor was doing a very great work in showing love, comforting and restoring hope to those living with HIV/AIDS, especially in his church. Yes, you heard me right. Church members who came to him for counseling after contracting the disease

are integrated into the fellowship of people living with HIV/AIDS (PLWHA) where they can get the love, understanding and care the society today is denying them. The pastor was already in a relationship with one of the sisters at the PLWHA fellowship and the only way to put an end to the chaotic situation with dreaming sisters in his church was to come public. It was a difficult decision but Satan must not be allowed to destroy the work of God in his church; because that could happen if he continued to keep quiet. On a day dedicated to talk about HIV/AIDS, the pastor stood before the church and recounted the event that led to the wife’s death. They did not know of the wife’s sickness with HIV on time, they would have managed it. The pastor believes that the death of the wife was for a purpose and encouraged members to go for voluntary HIV screening as prevention is less costly than cure. He informed the church that those infected could still live a normal life with adequate management, care and supportiveness from all especially those of us who are not infected. Finally, he announced his marriage engagement with a sister everybody knew in church, and members could swear that the sister must have lied about her contracting HIV just to marry the pastor. Unfortunately, HIV/AIDS does not show on the face! A popular HIV campaign slogan in Pidgin English is: “AIDS no dey show for faceo!!!”

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