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(In Real Life)” hosted by @raehanbobby and @ClaireSMBB. Summary compiled by @sachac.
Since you started using social media, have you met many people in real life?
jolewitz KatiaMillar OnePinky jmass jgombita TomOehmler StrategicMonk raehanbobby ideabloke raehanbobby StrategicMonk JoanneGuidoccio ideabloke raehanbobby raehanbobby AD_TO raehanbobby YES, since SoMe, met many IRL and some truly valuable relationships too Some of my fav ppl IRL I initially connected with through SM! yes! have met some amazing, like-minded, conscious tweeps like all of you here Love when what appears to be complete stranger walks up at a conference and says "I love your tweets!" When I travelled to Oz (four years ago) it was great meeting a LinkedIn contact in Melbourne. Farthest away IRL meeting! I am working backwards from meeting 100's of people a week to building my sm audience. I have been active on social media for 2 or 3 years & would like to meet more people in person. I initially used #sm to connect and get access to people, then last year started realizing the incredible transition to IRL I think I've become more mindful of the people I meet IRL, thanks to SM. I've always been an IRL person, then SM expanded my horizons to reach thousands and the quality of IRL connection went up! My connections through social media are balanced between people I am able to meet in person and people I can meet through Skype Not yet...I've been on Twitter only a few months. I'm hoping to get pointers on moving to IRL today One of the reasons I moved to Vegas recently, to facilitate IRL connections from SoMe via conventions and such. Sometimes the surprise IRL connections are more fun than the planned ones! Well I always say that IRL is the exponent to the SM connection. So I try to max the IRL's out! yes I have! I have met a good chunk of my followers. I love meeting people in general and no different on SM @raehanbobby Yes! I try to focus on each personl IRL one at a time.
Why is connecting IRL important to our personal and professional lives?
LovelyLu jgombita ClaireSMBB KatiaMillar LovelyLu F2F just deepens the connection, adds the 'human touch'. Online IS IRL, it will become more and more the way people connect. Meeting IRL tests the perceived character/values/personality versus the reality. Usually it's a positive. Occasionally it's not. Meeting IRL, for me, is about connecting on a different level, sharing energy and ideas SM is awesome, but IRL is where the juicy connection happens - nothing like a hug or eye contact! There are ways (phone, skype, G+) to add the human experience to online
jolewitz TomOehmler JoanneGuidoccio Hoovers raehanbobby raehanbobby ideabloke StrategicMonk raehanbobby Florentine23p raehanbobby JoanneGuidoccio AD_TO raehanbobby
relationships. We live in an impersonal world - F2F & IRL yields connection at a different level it's all about the personal relationships that grows a business. Can't beat face2face connections when trying to close a deal or move a relationship to the next level Connecting in real life #IRL is important for deepening relationships--personally, professionally--& even for brands. Even professional relationships get better production when you talk IRL vs. over tools IRL increase your SM connection exponentially! It takes the relationship to another level and shows that you're willing to invest more time & effort into growing it. Listening is more powerful in person than through social media. My virtual hug just exploded 1000x when I saw you in person! SM is great to widen the circle of people I can meet, but IRL impact/meeting is pretty much always the goal for me The closer in proximity you are, the greater chance of sharing vulnerability and rooting that connection more deeply The closer in proximity you are, the greater chance of sharing vulnerability and rooting that connection more deeply u need to have people skills. I find that personally and professionally, people must be able to trust one another When I see your face, I get a bird's eye view of your soul.
What are some of the challenges to making the SM to IRL transition?
ClaireSMBB LovelyLu OnePinky KatiaMillar StrategicMonk raehanbobby lmendersby AD_TO raehanbobby lmendersby JoanneGuidoccio Challenge can be time; I intentionally set time aside for IRL connections, anyone else? I find that some are shyer F2F than online. There's something to that strength through anonymity. just time and mostly geography challenge us from getting out IRL / F2F, unfortunately Some folks not nearly as open, warm & engaged IRL as they are on SM - so makes the meeting a bit awkward Connecting in person generally takes more time & effort than connecting through social media. Distance, time, fear of uncertainty and different personas between SM/IRL For some it's a different way of communicating. Typing instead of talking can be a challenge, as can the other way around. I feel it evolves around how to spark the first conversation. My advice: just do it! Many people feel very comfortable with the SM connection. But in IRL they've alot of anxiety. I've have many awkward meets SM conversations can create expectations that don't always translate well to F2F. Authenticity can look different on a screen. Time and distance are the main ones for me. Also, there is a certain comfort level in keeping the relationship totally SM
Typically logistical challenges: Geography, schedule, etc. (at least for me!)
Do you intentionally meet people IRL? Why?
jolewitz OnePinky ClaireSMBB LovelyLu KatiaMillar jgombita AD_TO raehanbobby StrategicMonk StrategicMonk AD_TO lmendersby JoanneGuidoccio raehanbobby Sometimes because you just know that IRL will expand the relationship & sometimes to "work together" in a special way always, our intention is to reach out into the communities we serve, which is worldwide, so #travel is def. part of our plan I intentionally meet IRL, it enriches my work, my life and my mind, to meet likepeople IRL Love to meet when geographically possible, but most of these connections I will never have the chance to because of that. SM is the first layer - IRL is when we have a chance to get to the juicy core - and connect soul to soul Only if it is a natural progression and/or there is something to be gained by both parties in doing so. Not JUST IRL social. 140 characters is not enough to have an epic conversation with stories and such. Dig deeper. Connection is always about authentic intention. I go in with that purpose IRL. I am intentionally open to meeting people in person. I intentionally meet people unintentionally. It is part of "marketing myself without marketing myself." I like sharing stories. U can only do that effectively in real life. It's important to remember that tech (SM or otherwise) is another vehicle for the common goal - communication & connection. Prefer IRL connections...only got into social media recently. Reminds me of my friend @steveshed who likes to "Network with Intent". The relationship and the why matter
Can you share a personal story of meeting via SM then IRL? Any good or bad ex?
OnePinky KatiaMillar Florentine23p LovelyLu ClaireSMBB AD_TO StrategicMonk ideabloke because of all the community groups we belong to, it happens all the time. always a delight (and sometime surprise) to meet IRL I remember when I met @raehanbobby - he came up and shared how excited he was, asked to take a pic. I felt like a celeb :) I used LinkedIn groups to connect with ppl in my industry abroad, led to Skype interviews, then IRL job. Good experience :) I've had good and bad experiences meeting offline, but some of my closest friends started off online, then off. Officer Scott Mills is 1st I met IRL and that day, he helped someone out of crisis, w/ twitter. He inspires me daily I connect w/ artists on twitter before in real life, and have built my site around the people I meet I host in person events to give people I meet on social media opportunities to meet in person. I started off by meeting people IRL locally first. There's always going to be someone on SM that's local to you. Start there.
raehanbobby raehanbobby raehanbobby raehanbobby TomOehmler lmendersby
I've had better IRL experiences with Twitter folks who focus on connections rather than selling or followers The odd ones are where I finally meet IRL and then they just start selling or their persona is completely different The quality of my IRL has gone up significantly thru the expansion of my SM connections. I find more diamonds! truth is, my closest friends of my life are IRL first. But some of the SM turned to IRL have incredible potential was approached IRL recently by a follower. Great experience - made an even better connection. What started as a tweet to ask about an article has turned into a relationship that challenges me & lifts me daily.
Are there any situations where transitioning from SM to IRL is not beneficial?
CASUDI LovelyLu Florentine23p jgombita jgombita TomOehmler raehanbobby raehanbobby Hoovers raehanbobby JoanneGuidoccio raehanbobby IMO going to REAL LIFE doesn't work when the online persona is fake &/or decpetive :-) It doesn't happen often, but some use SM to deceive people, and they are harmful to be around F2F. Not all SM connections have to become IRL. The key is to recognize the ones that are worth becoming IRL How about when one person doesn't really like the other person (that much) on SM, but is being pressured to meet IRL? When one person invites you for coffee (or a drink) to "pick your [social media] brains." Ummm. That's simply using a person. it's all about others and adding value to their life - personal and professional. Sometimes you have to decide after the first IRL meeting. It's clearer then. The challenge it's easier to hide who you really authentically are in SM vs. IRL. Just bear that in mind. Uh....Perfect example of awkward SM to IRL interaction transition: online dating (or so I've heard). 'Nuff said. When someone is not transparent. When there is a serious disconnect between the online and offline personalities--you don't see it until you're F2F When you know it's about something other than connecting.
How do you connect with people IRL? What are some of your best tips?
dariasteigman ClaireSMBB dariasteigman CASUDI OnePinky I always reach out when I'm traveling. DM or email about coffee, or about setting up a tweetup. I seek events or communities that are of interest, I ask my network, conferences, eventbrite, etc I try to get the other person talking. Ppl like to talk about themselves, so it's a good icebreaker for those who are shy. If a single F2F then Skype and email first > B4 IRL ( U can find out a lot via skype:-) join community (and OL) groups and attend their meet ups, LinkedIn has a strong local group, and many others: "natural"/organic
LovelyLu jmass jgombita raehanbobby raehanbobby raehanbobby raehanbobby raehanbobby StrategicMonk StrategicMonk TomOehmler Florentine23p ideabloke lmendersby raehanbobby
Most important tip - be yourself! I ask, what inspires you? <-- Start there. I tell them about events I plan to attend, which might be of interest. Send a link. Coneection Rule 99: "Know when to talk and when to listen and how to tell the difference" Connection Rule 157: "Always think the best of people and never assume the worst" Connection Rule 236: "The four basic food groups of connection are to listening, expressing, feeling, and learning" Connection Rule 85: "Every person has their story, so ask questions and be willing to listen to it" Gee, maybe I should send a link to almost all of my 315 Rules of Connection. :) I appreciate the spectrum, the range of options, from Twitter to DMs & IMs to Skype & FaceTime to in person. I have also been trading guest blog posts with people over the last couple of months, which can be another step. I've learned so much from Greg - @StrategicMonk,and @raehanbobby in the last hour! Thank you for sharing your wisdom. Listen at least as much as you talk My best tip: Be genuinely interested in them. Find one thing you can genuinely compliment them on and start from there. Remember the conversation is first about 'you' and then about 'I'. Everyone has a story & listen for the key plot points. Try connecting via SM before the event and build up the expectation of IRL.
How does taking SM to IRL transition affect your connection with others?
OnePinky ClaireSMBB raehanbobby raehanbobby SM and IRL are all part of the same whole, in our view. Building community around common inspiration takes ALL avenues â˜®,â™¥&** Worth saying again, IRL relationships enhance everything for me, work, my passion, my mind! everyone has a need to connect, to share their story, to feel part of a tribe. Use SM to IRL to build your community My connection is enhanced IRL with every smile, laugh, eye contact and hug
How does the SM to IRL transition affect your Leadership?
jmass raehanbobby raehanbobby You can't build real relationships w/complete strangers if you're not being real & being realed to. Increasing leadership EQ! Leaders connect and IRL is way more effective than SM to build deep authentic relationships. Invest b/c #peoplematter Many leaders are connected via SM. If they take it to IRL, they show investment in people, which is huge!