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The way I lived was full of shadow. My family was my strength, my reason for existing. God was my only true friend, so caring and understanding. But I was never complete. School was a joke, I never fit in or cared. There were never any good times that I can still remember. But the worst of times will haunt my dreams. Society was the enemy, I hated it and myself. It fed off my emotions like a carnivore enraged. And the more I fought it, the worse it became. I was helpless. A weaker person may have rolled over and died. But I knew that there was reason for life. Some day I would find my place in the world. Even if I had to conquer it first. Yet as time wore on I cared less. I was more interested in surviving. My home became my fortress and my heart, black ice. I cannot tell you what it was like, living only with hate. And then a voice from outside the darkness called to me. "Walk with me, my friend," it said. Is it God’s holy messenger or the Devil in disguise. I could not let the doubt, allow the chance to pass by. At first I was hesitant and suspicious of the voice. But it showed me a world that I never knew. And life began to have true meaning at last. There is a place for me. While my heart will always remain dark inside. And my eyes will always have a haunted gaze. The past that I lived and hate. Will not destroy the promise of the future. Yet, I’m still not complete inside. And while life has some meaning now. Nothing can help me with my remaining pain. I have always been alone. And there I stand at the edge of the world. Torn between the promise and the pain. Doomed to an Eternity of life. My heart has died but I must live.