The Bill Clinton, George W.

Bush, Multidimensional Golf Course With Hilary Clinton A Political Satire A Work of Fiction By Anthony J. Fejfar, B.A., J.D., Esq., Coif © Copyright 2007 by Anthony J. Fejfar President Bill Clinton (“BC”) and President George W. Bush (“GW”) are once again playing a round of multidimensional golf on the Mahoney Multidimsional Golf Course in Lincoln, Nebraska, on the Astral Plane, outside of space-time. BC and GW were on the 5th tee at Mahoney sizing up the hole. Suddenly, Bill Clinton’s wife, Senator Hilary Clinton walked up to the tee box with a golf ball and a putter golf club. “Hello, Hill,” said Bill. “Mrs. Clinton, nice to see you,” said GW. “Gentlemen, I want to play multidimensional golf with you, but being a woman and a feminist, it is my position that I can make up the rules as I go along.” Said Hilary Clinton (HC). “Well, I don’t know,” said GW, “ I though that equality between the sexes meant that we all play by the same rules.” “Well, no, not really,”said Hillary, “after Derrida and postmodernism it is safe to say that while we are all equal, women are more equal than men because they are superior.” “Interesting thought,” said BC. BC and GW both hit long drives off the tee box into the fairway of the golf course. Hillary, kept her putter and ball in hand and walked along. BC and GW both hit nice second shots onto the green, each about 20 feet from the pin on the par 4 hole. As the men put their clubs down at the edge of the green, Hillary Clinton walked up and dropped her ball approximately one foot from the hole.

As BC and GW lined up their shots, Hillary decided to go ahead and putt her ball, even though the rules said that the person with the ball furthest from the hole putts first. “Women first,” she said. Hillary made a nice one foot putt, and said, “Well, its not a hole in one, but it will do. I’ll take one stroke for the drop and a second stroke for the putt for a total of two strokes.” Both men two putted each scoring a par score of 4.

“See, I told you women are superior,” said Hillary, “I have scored a two on this hole and each of you has scored a 4, I win.” As the three golfers walked to the next tee box, GW asked Hillary, “Mrs. Clinton, who do you intend to put in your Cabinet if you should be elected President of the United States?” “Well,” said Hillary, “I intend to have an all woman cabinet as well as an all woman leadership in the military. I believe in matriarchy.” “Well, Hill,” said BC, “what major policy initiatives do you intend to accomplish while President?” “Well, first of I want a national involuntary commitment, mental health statute. Once that is in place I intend to set a policy that all men who support patriarchy and oppose matriarchy will be place involuntarily on a long term psychiatric ward for rehabilitation. I also intend to pass a law which says that a male cannot be paid a higher salary than a woman for doing similar work. I intend to keep men in the kitchen and the bedroom where they belong.” GW gagged, but said nothing. BC said, “Well, I suppose that is just about what our marriage is like so it should be O.K.” (to be continued)