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” Eleanor Wilson props herself up on her elbows, knowing that she's getting grass stains on the sleeves of her cardigan. “Do you ever wonder...” Sandra trails off, staring at the sky with her eyes glazed over slightly. “You're going to have to finish the question if you want an answer.” “Do you ever wonder what death is like?” Eleanor rolls her eyes as she settles back down onto her back. “Of course. All the time.” “No, but do you ever – what if there's nothing?” “Then I guess that sucks for us, doesn't it.” Sandra turns to face Eleanor, eyes wide and uncertain. “How can you just say that? Don't you ever worry about it?” “Everyone does,” Eleanor says with a dismissive wave of her hand. “I just try not to worry about it too much. I'd really rather not end up like my aunt Rose.” “Your – the one with dementia?” “I only have one aunt Rose, Sandra,” Eleanor replies as she rolls her eyes again. She really hopes her mother was wrong when she said her eyes would fall out if she rolled them too much. “Just – how do you know if you're worrying too much?” “If you have to ask, you're worrying too much. And stop talking like that, all disjointed. You're going to make me have a seizure.” “You're not epileptic,” Sandra retorts as her eyes narrow. “It's a figure of speech.” Eleanor refrains from rolling her eyes a third time. She likes them too much to lose them so soon. “No it isn't. I would have heard it before.” “You have heard it before.” “I meant from someone other than you.” Eleanor can't resist the urge this time. At least her eyes will have been lost for a good reason. “Whatever.” “Really, though, how would you react if there's nothing?”
filled with thoughts that will never be shared with anyone because nobody has the time to listen to them all. her face twisting into an expression of disgust.” Sandra gestures for Eleanor to continue. “Excuse you.” “Shut up and let me delude myself. If I don't exist.” “The word 'baby' is right in the name!” Sandra realizes too late that she shouldn't have raised her voice.” “That's awful. Sandra's mind still filled with questions to which she knows Eleanor will only provide frustrating answers. “I'm hungry.” Sandra says gently. breaking the silence.” Sandra mumbles under her breath. Eleanor shushes her. exasperation seeping into her tone. “You coming to my house for dinner tonight?” “No. “Yes it is. “Good for you. your majesty?” Eleanor asks. “Why are you thinking about this anyway? It's summer. We're supposed to be free of obligation and worry.” she says again.” “I'm ignoring it so it's ignorance. He's not a baby.“I wouldn't.” “That's not what that word means. sounding more acerbic than Sandra thought was possible. I have to babysit my grandfather. her voice meditative.” “You know it doesn't work that way.” Eleanor says.” Sandra says. “Ignorance. Ignorance is bliss and all that. killjoy. “If there's nothing. The girls sit for a few moments. “Would you rather I call it grandfathersitting. Eleanor's mind going a thousand miles an hour as always. Happy?” “Not particularly. .” Eleanor – ever the irascible one – says loudly. El.” Eleanor says. When Sandra opens her mouth to protest. I can't exist because I'm something. “I heard that.” Sandra says. 'Babysit' doesn't just apply to babies. “I never said he was. Smart aleck.” “It's not ignorance if you're aware of it. Eleanor sighs and rolls over onto her stomach. El. Sandra gives up – that's always the best course of action in these situations. I can't react.” Eleanor says. trying to calm her friend.” Sandra shoots back.” “I meant that you call it babysitting. she's come to learn. “I happen to love my grandfather more than anyone I've ever known.
Sandra lazily sits up before getting to her feet.” Sandra heaves a long-suffering sigh and turns to leave before Eleanor stops her with a shout.. “Get up.” “I heard you.” Sandra says with terror – partly mock. I'm sorry. “Not if one of us dies.“No. you do. “I also heard you say that I'm right.” Eleanor replies as though it's obvious. “Of course.” “Are you going to get up or what?” Eleanor asks.” .” Eleanor says.” “Damn straight I'm right. and Sandra grabs her ankle fondly. Can I please go eat now?” She sounds like a small child. I'm sorry.” Eleanor moves to stand.” Sandra says as Eleanor finally stands and brushes bits ground matter off of her dress. “I guess I have to.” Eleanor whines. Bell. So many bruises. “Saying that something is cliché is cliché in and of itself. “Does the pope wear a funny hat?” Eleanor counters. then yes.” “Please don't be mad at me.” Eleanor says sharply. “I mean it. I'd like to go eat now.” Eleanor commands. “I'll see you tomorrow. don't I.” At Sandra's obvious confusion. Wilson” Sandra teases. her movements graceful and slow. You're right. Eleanor elaborates. Sandra. “I said the conversation was finished. “How cliché of you. “Then I'll come back as a ghost and say goodbye.” “You wouldn't. her brow creasing as her mouth turns to a frown. “I could say the same to you.. This conversation is finished.” Sandra says slowly. Eleanor envies her – her own sense of balance is chancy at best on a good day. “Sandra! You didn't say goodbye. “I'm not.” “Unless you want me to get your mother to drag you back home. but Sandra catches her arm. mostly genuine.. “See you tomorrow?” Sandra asks as she picks up Eleanor's shoes and hands them over.
“But what if there's nothing?” Eleanor smirks. El.” “Goodbye. “Goodbye. Sandra sighs again. Sandra.” .