The Golf Kart Chronicles

By Renato Ferraz

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Index:
How it started My own kart The speed governor and key of life Casing the course home Episode 1 bring them back nice Episode 2 big crew not so nice return Episode 3 just a few of them Episode 4 snow mission Episode 5 dirt bike trails in the woods Episode 6 two towns away Episode 7 the last dare at the park All grown up and the kids turn Cool karts!

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How it started:
Well it all starts with this kid named Dondo, his mom bought this vacation property in the Pocono’s where kids 12 years old and older are allowed to drive golf carts and motor scooters within the gates of the vacation community without any type of permit, which was quite an attraction for Dondo at the time him being 12 years old himself. This place was OK, it was a gated vacation community with these trailers that expanded extra wide and the interiors of the trailers seemed very nice and you got a lot and there was one big lake with no motor boats allowed and two sandy beaches, a pool, tennis courts, basketball courts, racquetball, horse shoes, mini golf, small arcade,

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clubhouse and now it has a gym and the roads are flattened red clay dirt and the road that circles the lake is paved but rough, So his mom decided to buy the place because the price was reasonable and when they first got there his mom didn’t quite jump right on getting Dondo a scooter or golf cart, Dondo ended up riding his bicycle the first bunch of weekends and mounting pressure on his mother with hints every now and then. Finally towards the end of the summer that year, she bought his oldest brother a scooter and Dondo was promised a scooter next summer but as a consolation, his mother promised him one the next year, then the next weekend his mother was acting peculiar saying she had a surprise and later on that day there it was, a bubble gum pink, 3 wheeled, electric golf kart complete with Astroturf rug on the back of a flat bed truck being delivered to their lot.

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Dondo was speechless, his mom was so excited, she took the golf kart immediately for a ride around the whole place and promised dondo he could try driving it and made good on that promise. Dondo wasn’t too happy with the pink, but he didn’t care, he was being allowed to drive a vehicle at the age of 12 by himself, dondo would have drove all day but night came and the batteries needed to be charged and not to mention the golf cart did not have lights at all, guess mom forget a detail. The next summer dondo made sure his mother did not quite make good on her promise with the scooter and dondo continued driving that pink bubble gum thing for that summer and towards the end of the summer dondo had a little accident, he was coming down the road too fast or at least fast enough to make the 3 wheeled golf cart tip a little while he was turning

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into the driveway of the lot and put a rather large dent in the side of his mothers luxury car. Later on, dondo got the scooter for his birthday in November and he had to wait until the following summer to ride his scooter. The next summer dondo spent most of his summer there at the vacation spot to ride his motor scooter, he made lots of friends and drove the days away, sometimes non stop, he would come home and his face would be covered with dirt from riding all day. But he ran into some problems, he kept getting pulled over by the security guards for speeding and kept having problems and it grew and a bunch of kids had scooters, so he laid low and tried to stay out of trouble to avoid the pink golf cart. The following summer there was multiple scooter accidents involving

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paramedics and that basically was the end of unlicensed kids being able to drive motor scooters, and I think the one that made it official was when a teenage girl driving a motor scooter too fast crashed into a very young girl riding her bicycle and unfortunately they had to bring in the paramedics, dondo was 15 that summer, he was upset when they made the new scooter rules that you need to be licensed to drive them in the community.

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My own kart (sort of):
The summer dondo was 15, his mother’s pink 3 wheeled golf cart kept having problems, it wouldn’t hold a charge anymore and it was fixed a few times and basically turned into a lemon. So dondo’s mom decided to buy a newer golf cart and dondo went along with her to choose the next golf cart and he picked the fastest one he could find in the lot of used carts and then he and his mom agreed to canary yellow for the color of the cart and that’s the color it was delivered in. They also got it equipped with headlights so he was able to drive it at night and he was able to dig up two pairs of hub caps, two small ones for the front and two big ones for the back at the used golf cart lot they

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were buying it from. Even though it was really his mothers she told him it was his unless she needed it which lucky for dondo was not often, which he drove it as much as he could and the only thing that was missing was a windshield, but other wise it made summer there more worth while and also felt less home sick as well as from feeling like he is missing out on the action with his friends back home and he did bring his friends up with him too sometimes.

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The speed governor and key of life Dondo unfortunately ran into a problem, he lost the key to the cart and had to call a mechanic from the place he bought it to bring one for a fee, and dondo got so anxious, he kept looking under seat at the wiring where the key went and decided to give hot wiring it a shot and it was so simple he was sorry he called the guy who hadn’t come yet. Finally the mechanic comes and he is all smiles driving his flat bed truck with other golf carts on it and he explains he had other customers there in the community and finally gives dondo the key and dondo’s mom pays him and asks him to look at it to make sure its OK under the hood and dondo explains he hot wired it nervously and how he went about it and the guy said

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it was no problem, then the guy dropped it on dondo, he told him for that golf cart company, one key fits all for all years of that company and the gears started turning in dondo head of mischief. When dondo came home from that weekend in the Pocono’s, he was hanging with his friends in the park told his friends about his discovery and then brought up the idea to go have some fun in the golf course near their neighborhood and came up with a plan to case it and see if it was possible to go have some mischievous fun.

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Casing the course home:
It was the end of the summer and school started again, back home dondo was known as a skater and hung out with a bunch of skater punks from around his neighborhood and from school and all the other trouble makers from around the way. So dondo started cutting through the golf course as a shortcut to get to his friends houses and the park to come up from behind the main building at the golf course to see how they kept them and where. Later on dondo and his friends would go to stores that were on the other side of the course and they all got a good view as to where and how it was setup and those times they checked it out was during the day. There was one problem

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though, the wild dogs that lived in the course, they basically would chase any kids walking through if at the right place at the right time dondo knew from experience because he had to climb the trees several times, especially when he was riding his bicycle. So one night they were all hanging out in the park smoking weed and drinking beers and there was something like maybe 8 or so kids and they decided to go cut through the golf course at night to see what was going on and if anyone stopped them they would say they were going to the stores and when they went through the entrance they found a security guard, but not one in a little hut or house but he sat in his car and they all walked through, the security guard didn’t say a word and let him and all of his friends cut through and they noticed another group of kids were cutting through too so it seemed that

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the security guard had no problem with people cutting through at night which was certainly a plus, but it didn’t matter because they knew they could enter the course from all different places that the security guard could not see us anyway and it was important that he was far away from where they kept the golf carts stored and parked. So they walked through the course and went to the store and walked back through the course and came back through the way they entered and basically went back to the park and made plans for Friday night the next week. The rest of that week they started out with like eight or so people and when that Friday came some people did not show up, some people came over prepared with tools and they met in the park and drank beer and smoked

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weed and when it was late enough they made our way there.

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Episode 1: bring them back nice They were finally all ready at the park and good and wasted, they had a big pair of bolt cutters, a few wrenches and some paper clips. It was like 11:30PM and they figured that was late enough to go, they then all made it to the entrance of the golf course and they did not see the security guard anywhere and figured he was in the course or just not there. They went behind the main building where they parked all the carts and there were a few parked just on the lot and the main set was all parked in this small fenced in area, most of the carts looked like they were getting old but they were all the same brand of golf cart that he had two keys for and dondo went on to show them how to hot wire them with the paper clips

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with the cars outside, then they started getting all excited when dondo started driving the first hotwired cart then they all started scrambling to pick and call dibbs on cars then dondo was like wait, and he showed them how to adjust the speed controller to make them go faster and Then the fence they had the carts locked in was not locked at all, they simply opened it up and there was no need for the tools, the paper clips were enough that night so everyone had an individual cart and they all took off the back way into the course and at first they just drove the golf cart road all around the entire course a couple of times and had like races or they would road rage on each other when one cart was slower than the other. They kind of stayed off the grass because the golf cart road was nice and smooth and they wanted to come back and do it again. They stopped

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and took a break up by where the store was and left the carts near by in the course and went to get some drinks and cigarettes and snacks. When they went back to the carts they were just hanging out talking about what they were going to do next, and these girls and this guy they knew from the neighborhood were cutting through the golf course and saw them and they were getting a kick out of them all sitting in the carts and they offered them a ride to the other side of the course and they drove them somewhat near the front entrance and noticed the security guard was back and figured he went to the store or something. So they drove around a bit more within the course and raced around a bit and stayed clear of the security guard and they did little to no damage at the course that night except maybe some weeds and at like 4AM they returned the carts as they found them the best they could and they all went home that night triumphant!

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Dondo went home and couldn’t sleep cause he was so excited the plan went perfect and nothing went to wrong. The next day they all met up at the hand ball courts in their neighborhood and they weren’t really going and bragging about it because they decided it would be a secret so they can keep on doing for a while and they made plans to go there the next Friday night and do it all again except with more weed and beer this time and make a small party out of it and see if they could get some girls to come hang with them too.

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Episode 2: big crew not so nice return
This time around they all met in the park again, it was like a keg party without the keg this time all sorts of people, lots of guys and girls and lots of weed smoking and forty’s of beer and 6 packs and they were just hanging in the park and it seemed to be like out of no where there were so many kids hanging there on Friday night it was not usual but it was cool, don’t think I ever saw so many kids there at once, it was almost out of control but around 10:30PM and 11PM it died down and people either moved on to do other stuff like go to party’s or go clubbing in the city and whatever teens did at the time.

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Finally at around midnight, they gather a group of kids except it was like 15 or 20 kids and a few chicks too, they all made our way to the golf course with just paper clips and they started making our way through and they saw the security guard and he didn’t say anything but they remained cautious and hung out in the back of the course until around 1:30AM and by that time a few people went home but there was still a bunch of people there. they still had beer and weed and they were just sitting on the benches near one of the golf holes and finally they made our way to the back of the building and they had a couple of us watch the security guard in case he moved but he didn’t, and he fell asleep on top of that so they were in the clear. They got to the back of the building where the carts were parked but this

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time there was none parked outside the gated fence and there was a small lock on the fence. And while they were up against the fence they saw a pair of pliers on the floor from the week before in the weeds and began unscrewing the fence on the ends, then they came to find that the golf carts near the fence gate did not have batteries so they were obviously onto them that something was going on, they then went on to find which carts worked and they found enough for everyone to have their own carts. That night with that big pack of kids there was bound to be some wild things happening and those things did happen. First they started out fine and made they’re way to the back of the course and on the way is where it got wild. One kid started road raging and and turned around while he was driving and started trying steering the wheel

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with his butt and had his foot on the gas yelling at the kid behind him (joking around) and then the kid passed him and cut him off and almost knocked him out of the golf cart. Then they started chasing the one kid road raging and they started cutting him off by bumping into the front corner of the golf cart forcing it another direction and they finally got it to point where it was a challenge to do it and they finally cut him off on a down hill and his cart skid out of control to the side and he went flying out the side of the golf cart and started rolling down the hill sideways and they laughed so hard and he got up and ran back to his cart limping and they laughed at him the whole way back. Then this pair that stayed in the same cart cause they were smoking joints one after the other and passing them

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to other kids driving other carts they wandered off to a sand pit that had a steep hill over it and they went down the steep hill and turned and both of them were flung out of the cart into the sand and the golf cart tipped on its side cause it happened kind of slow motion like and again it was very funny with lots of laughs, then they took a weed smoking break the final joint of the night and all the beer was gone. They plotted out a race course and decided to make a 10 lap race with no rules, this turned out to be the most cut throat race and driving of the whole night with crazy jokers behind the wheels of these carts. They were going half on the paved golf cart trail and half on the grass and a small section that cut through a wooded area. In the first few laps there was a couple of bang ups that took one of the front wheels of the carts and made it permanently turn

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left and stopped working and that cart had to be dumped and moved out of the way, and the same thing happened again to another cart. Another kid smashed someone in the rear so hard they lifted the cart and gave them a flat tire, before they knew it, there were two people on almost all the carts now and a bunch had been cast aside and broken. Then just before the race was completed it went from a race to a crash up derby and people were throwing all shame out the window. Two sets of people on the two carts started attacking one cart at a time on the laps of the race, sending one cart into the woods and they figured out how to break the front wheel so it wouldn’t steer then there was only three golf carts left out of like 10 or more that worked, the rest had been crashed, and the two carts teamed up on the one and they came at it from both directions and they hit the cart so

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hard that they made the driver go into the air and spin around long ways like his body was the blade of a helicopter and his body landed between the two carts and squished him preventing him from hitting the floor and they had to back up one of the carts to get him loose. Finally they all piled onto the three carts at around 5AM and headed towards all of their houses and parked the carts some distance from the guard and walked by him like nothing happened and he had no idea, that night went down in everyone’s mental history books that night. They did not go back there for a long time considering they would probably beef up the security there and they did.

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Episode 3: just a few of them About a month or so after the last time they went on the golf cart joy rides, they got impatient and a small group of like six or seven kids got together on a Thursday night and it was all setup over the phone, calling each other and they had simply made a bunch of calls and planned to get some weed and tools together and have some fun but this time it was more of a challenge considering that the golf course surely updated the poor security system. They all met at the store on the other side of the course to enter from the back of the golf course through the short cut trail so they would not be seen by the security guard but they ran into one problem, the dogs

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barking, they heard the dogs barking and just made their way back out into the street where the shortcut trail began. One of them decided to go around to another shortcut and get the dogs attention and attract the dogs away from their path so they would not be close to the dogs and he would meet them by the back of the building when he was done. They hung out and waited for a little while and headed back into the woods to the shortcut trail and the dogs were thankfully not there or barking. They made their way to the back of the building and like clock work the other one guy met them their and told them he basically called them to another section of the park and hopped over some fence, whatever he did it worked. They came to find that there was a thick chain lock around the fence gates and big boulders blocking it, they had brought the bolt cutters again

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and could not get through the chain but the lock was no problem, like butter, and they all had to get together to move the big boulders out of the way and they even had a big tree log there too that they obviously used the nearby bobcat machine to place there and when all was said and done, there was bunch of carts in the fenced area but they were mostly the broken ones and the ones that looked ok didn’t have any batteries and they realized it was now the junk yard and then they looked in the window that was in the fenced area and saw a bunch of good carts inside the garage and to their luck the window slid right open. Then they climbed into the garage and there was the whole fleet of golf carts, just one small light on, enough to find the garage door opener but before they could open it someone standing watch outside just started running without saying a word then someone inside the garage just leaped out the window and started running

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and another person in the garage yelled they are all running then everyone started running out of the garage and they all went towards the back of the course, but not too far from the back of the building and they saw a car come around and it sat there for like ten or fifteen minutes and it finally went back around to the front and they waited another fifteen minutes and they went back and nothing was changed so they went in fast and opened the garage and headed out of there and they went towards the back of the course and as they were getting there they noticed a car was approaching them in the course and they went out one of the back ways and ended up on the streets they cut through this neighborhood and went to a new neighborhood that was under construction and it had the entrance blocked off enough so cars could not go through but the golf carts fit right through so it seemed like a safe spot to go to. They raced around

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the unfinished streets of the construction site and there was a lot of bumps and dirty dusty clouds from the carts and the strangest thing happened, one of the cart hit a bump and started smoking real thick but then all of a sudden like it had a turbo booster, it went really fast, more than double the regular speed, they could not believe it and that night someone had called the fire dept, because they arrived and blocked them all in so everyone jumped out of their carts and started running and one guy just drove to the other end of the site and drove all the way to a patch of woods near his house and parked his cart there and the rest of the crew hung out a few blocks away and went back when the firemen left. Then they started racing again, they were having all sorts of fun then it happened, two carts crashed and broke the steering except, it wasn’t funny, they were pissed cause they

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wanted to keep them too like the other guy who went home with his then they all jumped into the one cart and headed towards the park. They get to the park and start driving up and down the paths and they saw some friends here and there and gave their friends rides from on end of the park to the other, but wouldn’t let anyone drive though. Finally when they were near one of the many entrances of the park, cops pulled up and started getting out of their car to chase them on foot and they drove the cart to the other side of the park and left it there and took off on foot and they hung around and watched the cop’s finally pull up and then one drove the cart away with his partner following him in the cop car after that they all walked home.

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Episode 4: Snow mission
One day in the winter, dondo and all of his friends went around the neighborhood knocking on people doors offering to shovel their driveways and sidewalks for money and as it got late into the night and they were all done waling down one of the streets near the park with their shovels on their shoulders, one had suggested it may be fun with all the snow and the more they talked about it, the more they wanted to do it and finally it became a mission and they decided to go for it right then, then walked directly to the course and as they suspected there was no security guard and they walked right up to the back of the building and went right

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into the garage window that was no longer blocked in by the fence, the fence was gone, they went into the garage through the window to discover the golf course had bought brand new golf carts for the new season coming and the golf carts still had the plastic covers on them. They went around on got them ready and hot wired them all then opened the garage door and went out towards the back but as soon as they hit the deeper snow they realized the carts did not get good traction and were going real slow and getting caught might be easy they finally started building momentum but it was hard to see what was what in the course because everything had a thick blanket of snow over it and it was dark outside and they were all going at full speed at one point and they realize there was a deep trench coming up and one of the drivers jumped out of his cart and rolled cause he knew it was too late and the passenger just stayed where

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he was and lucky for him when the cart hit the trench he flew onto the other side and landed on the bank. The other guys were able to skid out or go around the trench just the one cart went into it and they end up pushing it out and getting back on the course. They raced around for a while but it got colder and colder and finally they had enough and left the carts up towards the back of the course and thought that would be the last time they do it before they are old enough to go to jail.

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Episode 5: Dirt bike trails in the woods
One night a bunch of the main guys who were on every golf cart mission to date up until that point and they were all hanging out at this kid from around the neighborhood’s house who was big on dirt bikes and motocross and was known for riding in the woods behind his house and he carved a bunch of trails in those woods over the years riding through the woods and they were talking about the golf cart stories telling him all about them and he wanted to come along and see what it was all about and he wanted to go right then so they set out for the course and it had been a while since the last time in the winter. They got to the course and the security guard was there, and they

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were forced to walk through and hang out but instead of waiting they just came right back. It was still a bit cold out but no snow, it was the beginning of spring and they all had to wear jackets still, they had brought back the boulders again and blocked off the garage door with really big boulders but it didn’t matter because there was enough kids there to move them out of the way, the new carts were still there but they remembered they needed to be adjusted to go faster and they hooked them up. They did not mess around in the course, they went strait to the closest shortcut out and went strait to the woods, that night was a clear night with a full moon and they were able to see in the woods. They went up and down every trail in those woods and they had a lot of fun and they started

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out with five carts and by the end of the night ended up with three. They left the carts parked in the woods and when they came back the next day they had discovered their friends who rides the motorcycles invited the older kids from around the neighbor hood to try them and they basically took them over and wouldn’t let them drive them anymore and they ended keeping them for a long time. A few months later, the crew of kids that put them there went back to claim them, they found them covered in camouflage and they were all gassed up, that night they raced for hours and at the end of the night deliberately had a smash up derby and rolled one cart down a hill into a small river or creek that went through the woods and the other one was crashed into a tree and the steering was ruined the last cart was spared because the older kids came looking for the carts and they

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ended up taking off and running from them and leaving the last good cart behind and that was the last time they had all got together and went on a cart mission.

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Episode 6: Two towns away
A few weeks after the whole dirt bike trails thing, they were a little disturbed by the fact that they were taken over by the older kids and bullied out of the carts and couldn’t ride in those woods without being worried about it happening again because the woods had become off limits at that point. A small group of four of them got together to take four carts and go on a big mission two towns away to see these girls at a school yard they were supposed to meet them at.

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They went at around 8PM and they went in the back way. One of them went around to check to see if there was a security guard and he noticed the car parked in a different spot then usual and went over to take a closer look and discovered that the security guard was getting laid, he was in the middle of getting a blow job, so he went back and told the other guys waiting what he saw so they decided to go mess with him and tap on the window to mess him up and stretch out the time they had to take the carts. So all of them head over to the car and sure enough the guy was now banging the chick in his backseat and the windows were al fogged up and the dude knocks on his window and asks for directions to the store, the guy was cool but the girl was pissed, and she was trying to fix herself up with her boobs hangin out, theyu got a real good kick out of it plus they knew they had more time to go get

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those carts. They get back to the back of the building and they realize moving the boulders wouldn’t be easy but they managed, they ended up using one of the carts to move the boulders out of the way and they drove strait to one of the short cuts and went strait out of the course and headed to that school yard the girls would be at. They drove through two towns and thankfully did not run into police the whole way and out of no where they see an undercover cop type car come pulling up real fast next to one of them and the person driving opens his door to fast and the cart skids and almost takes off the door bending it backwards, it ends up being some friends from school and one of the kids hops on the cart cause they were going towards his house and they dropped him off right out in front of his house then they finally make it to the school yard and the girls didn’t

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want to get on the carts or do anything for that matter, they were just being teases so finally one of the guys starts showing off and crashes his cart into the wall and almost tips it over and then he is forced to hop onto another cart and right after that the cart he hops onto crashes and they are forced to get on the other carts. They decide to get out of there and left the chicks because they were boring and headed back towards their neighborhood and on the way there they came to this area where there was these blocks that turned around and had this park type thing on the end of each block so they figured that was a safer way to go and then when they got there they decided it would be a good race track and started racing then one of the guys driving decided he didn’t want to race anymore and started going down one of the streets and he was on the sidewalk, then he starts taking out every single garbage

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can on the block dragging them down the street and smashing them into cars and he even grabbed a garbage can and dragged it with his hand and let it go in the middle of the street. Then they catch up to him and start racing n the park thing and the guy who went on his tirade crashed into a tree and ruined his steering. They were down to one cart and wanted to get closer to their neighborhood. They started heading to the park and along the way they knocked down plenty more garbage cans and side swiped some cars and when they just got to the park, they were spotted by cops, they started driving towards an entrance they last escaped with but cops showed up there with the lights on, then the first cop car drove onto the sidewalk and into the park on the grass to get them and as soon as they saw they all bailed out of the car onto the park grass while it was going down the hill and the cops went for

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the car and the kids were all gone by that point over fences and they got away but that was closest they were to getting caught so far.

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Episode 7: The last dare at the park
One night that summer there was a large crowd once again at the park, there was all sorts of people there that normally did not hangout there but lived around there, by that time those guys were known around the neighborhood for the golf cart stories and one of the guys was talking to this hot chick and he was trying to hook up with her and she said she did not believe the stories and wanted to see it for herself so him and this new kid that just started hanging around the park took a walk to go get a cart and show her how easy it is. They get there and to their surprise there was a cart parked outside by

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itself and he thought it was too good to be true and lifted the hood to see if there was a battery missing or something and it wasn’t and then he hot wired it and it worked and it was actually pretty fast. So he went right out the front entrance of the golf course and went strait into the park and the whole crowd of kids started running towards him and they all wanted to jump on and go for a ride, they drove around the park for a while and everyone took turns taking rides until the cops showed up and then the whole crowd of like forty kids scattered and left the cart and they later saw the cops driving the cart back to the course and that was last night that carts were taken by anyone in that crew.

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All grown up and the kids turn
These days dondo is all grown up and has kids of his own and they cannot wait to get their golf cart license in the Pocono’s. They have them all picked out and what colors they want and everything.

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Cool karts!
Here are some cool carts I found on the internet, they have all sorts of wild stuff from off road to low rider and let’s face it, if you got a golf cart, you’re a pimp of some kind.

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Thanks for checking out this book!