It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.

~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

1

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

! The Bible has a LOT to say about anger. In Proverbs we see that the Bible specifically talks about angry women, not just in general about mankind. Unfortunately for men the angry woman is often exposed too late after they have gotten married. There are only two things that can keep a lady from being angry: being born again and being filled with the Spirit. If you have never accepted Jesus as your Savior it is impossible to walk in the Spirit. The Bible tells us we have all sinned (Romans 3:23). It goes on to tell us that our sin must be paid for (Romans 6:23). WE can personally pay for our sin by dying and going to hell. That doesn’t sound good to me. The Bible shows us a much better way. Romans 5:8 tells us that God commendeth (shows) his love towards us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. It is not enough to know that Jesus Christ came to this world, was sinless, died on the cross and rose again the third day to pay for our sins. The Bible instructs us that we must personally accept his free gift of salvation (Romans 10:9, 10, 13) Anger is a work of the flesh and is seen more readily when a person is not walking in the Spirit. Let’s define some of the words we find in our texts: !

Brawling: _____________________________ Contentioius: __________________________ Angry: ________________________________

! We are going to look at several different examples in scripture of angry women and what the results of their actions were. We are going to look at the life of Michal, David’s wife and see how her expressions of anger caused her to not only be barren for her life but also the adoptive children she later fostered were taken from her violently. We are going to examine the life of Peninah. Peninah was the second wife of Elkanah. After Hannah failed to produce and heir, Elkanah took a second wife. This knowledge that she was not married for love probably drove Peninah to say and do some of the angry hateful things she did. There are several other ladies we are going to be looking at. Keep an open heart to what God has for you and ask him to reveal any area in your life that may need to be changed.

2

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

I. Explanation of an Angry Woman
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

A. And angry woman is hard to live with. ! 1. Proverbs 21: 9 says, It is better to dwell in a corner of the ! housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. • As you read this verse there is a word picture that develops. What does that look like to you?

2. Michal was David’s wife, given to him from her father, King Saul. She saw her husband David dancing in the street because he was happy that the ark of the covenant was being returned to Jerusalem. As she sees this, she despises David. Read II Samuel 6:14-23. Identify how Michal did wrong:

! !

B. An angry woman is continually contentious. ! 1. Proverbs has a lot to say about her contention. Consider the ! following verses: • Proverbs 18:6 A fool’s lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes. • Proverbs 19:13 A foolish son is the calamity of his father: and the contentions of a wife are a continual dropping. • Proverbs 27:15 A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. • How do you think these verses apply to the modern woman?

• How do they apply to you?

3

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

2. Let’s look at a Biblical example of this continual contention. Read I Samuel 1:1-7. Peninnah was the wife of Elkanah. Elkanah had two wives. He loved Hannah but Hannah couldn’t have children so he took another wife, Peninnah. Can you imagine being Peninnah and realizing that you are not married because of love, but because of your abilities to have babies! This knowledge must have led Peninnah to be mean and contentious towards Hannah. As you read this passage did it cause you to think of any modern day women that act this way? What was the result? (Please refrain from using names as we don’t want to gossip, merely to be a student of society and how the Bible can have a impact on today.)

C. An angry woman does not rule her spirit. ! 1. Proverbs 16:31 says, He that is slow to anger is better than the ! mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city. Anger ! is only one letter away from the word Danger! Have you ever seen ! those that are slow to anger? How do they act as apposed to ! reacting when something/someone annoying comes their way? ! ! ! ! ! ! How about someone who is quick to anger? What are some of the dangers of a quick temper? 2. Read II Chronicles 23:10-18. Athaliah was upset the Joash was now king. She knew that his love of God would lead the people away from worshipping the false god Baal. What was her response when she didn’t get her way and what resulted from her reaction?

! ! ! !

D. An angry woman’s contention is caused by pride. ! 1. Proverbs 13:10 says, Only by pride cometh contention: but with ! the well advised is wisdom. According to this verse how does ! contention come? • Identify ways you may have had pride and how that pride brought contention. Confess and ask God to forgive you and ask him to help you in the future!

4

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

!

!

2. Take a quick look at Miriam’s reactions, Read Numbers 12:1-15. • How was pride involved in Miriam’s words? • What was the result? • How does this influence your behavior?

! ! ! !

E. An angry woman is a scorner. ! 1. Proverbs 22:10 tells us that if we Cast out the scorner, and ! contention shall go out; yea, strife and reproach shall cease. We ! see in the point above that contention is caused by pride. • Who do we see in this verse causing the contention? • The Bible is very clear about what we are to do with a scorner. What do you think that means? • What happens when we obey the Bible regarding a scorner?

II. Ethics of an Angry Woman
! ! ! ! ! ! ! A. An angry woman deals foolishly. ! 1. Look up Proverbs 12:16 and 14:17. What do these verses tell ! us about the suddenness of anger? ! ! ! ! 2. Describe the difference in the two people given to us in Proverbs 14:29, He that is slow to wrath is of great understanding: but he that is hasty of spirit exalteth folly.

! !

! !

3. What did Herodias’ anger in Matthew 14:3-10, cause Herod to foolishly do?
5

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

! ! ! ! !

! ! ! ! !

4. Ecclesiastes 7:9 says to Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools. In these verse we find King Solomon, the wisest man who has ever lived, at the end of his life. He is telling us that when you see an angry person that they are a foolish person. Choosing wisdom means choosing what? why?

! ! !

B. An angry woman stirs up strife. ! 1. As coals are to burning coals, and wood to fire; so is a ! contentious man to kindle strife. ~ Proverbs 26:21. • What happens when you add coal to fire that is already burning or wood to fire? • How does this parallel to the contentious person and strife?

! ! !

! ! !

2. Proverbs 29:22 says that An angry man stirreth up strife, and furious man aboundeth in transgression. What does this say about a angry/furious person?

! ! !

! ! !

3. Read Genesis 29:32-30:4. What did Rachel’s contention in this passage influence her husband to do?

• All of us have contention at one time or another. Take a moment to consider your actions. How has this affected those around you? What could you do differently?

! ! ! ! !

C. An angry woman speaks grievous words. ! 1. Proverbs 15:1 says, A soft answer turneth away wrath: but ! grievous words stir up anger. Have you ever witnessed a situation ! where this verse was lived out? What was the result either negative ! or positive?
6

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

2. Sarah had not had a baby like God had promised her. So she took matters into her own hand and had Abraham be with her handmaid. Hagar, her handmaid had a baby named Ishmael. Time passes and God remembers Sarah and at the ripe age of 90 she conceives the promised son, Isaac. Hagar’s son Ishmael makes fun of Isaac. This makes Sarah very mad and she used grievous words, (Read Genesis 21:9-12). How do you think this made her husband feel when she talked this way to him? • How do you think your husband/father/boss/pastor feels when you talk this way to him? • What would have been a better response on Sarah’s part?

III. End of an Angry Woman
! ! ! ! A. People want to get away from an angry woman. ! 1. It is better to dwell in a wilderness, than with a contentious and ! an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19. What a word picture! The ! desire to dwell in a barren wilderness than with this woman?! Have ! you ever made your husband/father/boss/pastor feel this way? • Confess it to God, ask forgiveness of Him and your husband/ father/boss/pastor. Ask God to help you do better. If need be, find a friend you can confide in and ask them to keep you accountable. ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! 2. Proverbs 25:23, 24 says that The north wind driveth away rain: so doth an angry countenance a backbiting tongue. It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman and in a wide house. Wow!!! Don’t be the North Wind driving people away from you. If you find yourself lacking in friends, maybe take a moment to evaluate your facial expressions and use of your tongue. It is sad to think that you could have this big beautiful house and be such an angry backbiting woman that your family would rather live in the tiny corner of the housetop than with you.

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

7

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

B. People want to hide from a angry woman. ! 1. Proverbs 27:15, 16 says that A continual dropping in a very rainy ! day and a contentious woman are alike. Whosoever hideth her ! hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which ! bewrayeth itself. ! ! ! 2. Is it possible to hide the wind? Then would it be possible to hid a contentious woman? Why or why not? 3. What does bewrayeth mean?

C. People want to smite the angry woman. ! 1. In Proverbs 18:6 it tells us that A fool’s lips enter into contention, ! and his mouth calleth for strokes. ! 2. Dear Christian Lady, don’t be the one who makes people desire ! to smite you. Please keep your anger in check controlled by the ! Holy Spirit.

IV. Effort to Avoid being an Angry Woman
! ! ! ! A. Inwardly ! 1. Ephesians 4:26-27 says to Be angry, and sin not: let not the sun ! go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil. When we ! sin in our anger, what does this imply we are doing to the Devil? • What does this mean? • How does this affect you? ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! 2. Philippians 4:5 tells us to Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. We are to live moderate lives. So often we think this may mean only outward lives that people see. Being emotional creatures that is easy to think this, but when God told us to let our moderation be known unto all men, He didn’t specify, He meant all. It is interesting that at the last part of this verse it says that The Lord is at hand. How close is at hand? Does the Lord witness our time of emotional instability? How do you think he views it?
8

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

! ! ! ! ! ! !

3. Psalm 37:8 says to Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in any wise to do evil. This verse implies that if we cease from anger and forsake wrath avoiding sin will naturally take care of itself. Identify areas in your life that you may need to cease from anger and forsake wrath? Choose today what you will do about those areas and then tell a friend to help you become accountable!

! 4. Ephesians 4:31, 32 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and ! clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: ! And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one ! another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you. If you ! have bitterness in your life it may be what is causing your wrath, ! anger, clamour, or evil speaking. Ask God to forgive you for your ! bitterness and release that person or situation in your life that is ! holding you back by forgiving them! This will make verse 32 much ! more natural. Working at it will continue to be a choice you ! will have to daily, if not hourly make! B. Externally ! 1. Proverbs 22:24, 25 says that we are to Make no friendship with ! an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou ! learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul. When we are angry and ! furious, not only do people not want to be around us, but we find ! that God commands them not to be around us because we will ! teach them our ways and be a snare to them. ! ! ! ! ! 2. Proverbs 15:1 tells us that A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. Choose soft answers and reject grievous words. choosing to use soft words before they are needed will better enable you to use them when the need arise. Write your commitment here, sign, and date it.

9

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21,9 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. ~ Proverbs 21:19

Angry Woman

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

3. Proverbs 15:18 says that A wrathful man stirreth up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife. Read Proverbs 6:16-19. We see that God hates 6 things: List them here: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. What is the 7th thing? What is an abomination? Determine to not be the angry person who stirs ups strife! Determine to live a life of soft answers, moderation and harmony!

In conclusion what can we learn from the Angry woman? How has God spoken to you? What decisions are you going to make? Name one thing that is going to change in your life as a result of this study?

10