Prayer to Recognize my own Faults, by HH Dudjom Rinpoche, Jigdral Yeshe Dorje (A prayer to recognize my own faults and keep
in mind the objects of refuge. A confession of defects, and a prayer of aspiration to understand very clearly what to accept and what to reject. Translated by Bhakha Tulku Rinpoche and Constance Wilkinson in Boudhnath, Nepal 1989.) I pay homage to the Guru! Shakyamuni, Victorious One. Supreme guide of the realm for this fortunate aeon, Sons of the Victorious one, Assembly of noble Bodhisattvas who tame sentient beings, Lord guru, matchless savior of beings in the dark age, The three Roots and oath-bound Dharma guardians— Again and again, I ask from my heart, Recalling you with longing and one-pointed mind— Please turn your attention toward me. Take hold of me with your lovingkindness And with the power of your unhindered compassion Grant your blessings that my thoughts and aims be carried out in accord with Dharma. Through past acts, not without merit, I have obtained this precious human birth. Through past merit, not slight, I have met the sublime Dharma. Accepted by the guru, I was able to obtain empowerments, Blessings, and the essential instructions— All this wealth I now hold in my hands. But my mind, like a babbling monkey, falls under the sway Of the enticing, deceptive demon of distraction And I cannot take advantage of the wealth that is my own. Thus, this free, well-favored human birth And the lama’s teaching are both wasted. Now I am at a turning point: All the teachings that I’ve asked for, All I’ve received, are like a myth. My body has the appearance of a practitioner, And I have a practitioner’s conceit; My mind cannot fathom the true teachings. Lacking even a trace of common Dharma, much less holy Dharma, The sixteen rules for ordinary social behavior Are just something that I’ve heard of. Seeing myself behave badly, I’m without shame; Seen by others, I’m unembarassed; My bond to the teachings is short as a marmot’s tail.
Unable to practice properly true Dharma’s ten virtuous deeds,
Though intellectual analyses cannot penetrate The deep meaning of the teachings. I think. Although I act as if I practice the paths of kyerim and dzogrim. I slander the teachings and great beings And gather up bad karma. greed rage like fire. “I posses the precious Bodhisattva training!” But the Four Boundless Ones are just like pictures of a lamp. Love and respect toward my vajra friends weakens.Harboring sectarian bias toward the one Buddha’s teachings. not respecting the first root transgression. The more teaching I’ve received. On the inside— desire. respect and devotion slowly ebb away. The love and compassion that comes about From seeing all beings of the six realms as my parents Disappears like mist. I become careless about all the rest. attachment. When I practice remaining in mind’s true condition I am without stability. but can’t make use of that recognition. I recognize that the ultimate teaching of sutra and tantra Is emptiness. I can glibly explain the Four Thoughts That Turn the Mind to Dharma. I think. yet I mouth off about the profound view And toss cause and effect to the winds. “I keep the Secret Mantrayana samayas!” But. I cannot even cope with ordinary endless delusion. Instead of having pure perception. “I keep the Pratimoksha disciplines!” But the four dharma practices have been lost without a trace. On the outside—I can give a show of good behavior. Though I rely on a teacher. My mindstream stays hard as horn. Based on Dharma I carry a great weight of evil deeds. And see the guru as my equal. With conceit. I have wrong views. With conceit. With conceit.
. Unable to endure a few harsh words. The more my vision of myself inflates. But my attachment to phenomena Shows that my own mind has not truly changed. I think. Lacking thorough training in bodhicitta. I complain constantly.
Grant the deliverance of finding the perfect.
. I am only more discouraged. With your compassion. Failing to maintain mindfulness. falling under the sway of unawareness. Be my refuge from the danger of the precipitous. errant path. There are no friends to benefit and ease my mind. Bringing these to mind. Although it is impossible that the Three Jewels betray me. I see That everything I’ve done has only added on to my confusion. I am sickened. Whatever offenses against Dharma have occurred. although I am without the wrong view Of not believing in the teacher and the holy Dharma. night and day. Isn’t that self-deception? Thus. When I examine myself. liberating path. Looking to others. heedlessly. Thinking to act for other’s benefit is just a fairytale. To wait for a rescue that can never come. I confess. Whatever samaya transgressions and violations. My whole life has been spent practicing this and practicing that With nothing in my hands to show for it. From the bottom of my heart. Knowing. In these bad times we sentient beings Are busily perfecting our bad karma. Thus. Due to my weak devotion.Though my body remains in isolated mountain retreat. with shame and remorse recognizing my own errors. If I cannot take care of myself now. we suffer a great loss. I won’t try to conceal from those with wisdom vision. Not seeing that even my virtuous acts Are polluted with negativities Where else is there to end up but in the lower realms? As for the way I behave and what I’ve done. My mind wanders into town constantly. That all my thinking has been stained By the obscuring emotions and by grasping. please endure me. Without enjoying a real measure of certainty in myself. I fear I will betray myself. Others cannot give me refuge when hope is exhausted And I’m in the hands of the messengers of the Lord of Death. No attainment.
Grant your blessing that I develop trust in Dharma. cruel. Root guru who combines all refuges in one. Take hold of me with your compassion. Grant your blessing that I free my mindstream the innermost practice. seeing that I have so little time left. Grant your blessing that I gain the great effortless certainty. lord of greatest kindness. Grant your blessing that I be unconcerned at the time of death. Grant your blessing that I develop unfabricated devotion and respect. Grant your blessing that I have no wish to see the faults of others. Grant your blessing that I practice impartial pure perception. Grant your blessing that I recognize my own innate wakefulness. And missing the one thing I need Why not go on the path of knowing the one thing that frees all? Certain. Grant your blessing that the duality of hope and fear be extinguished. Grant your blessing that desire may lessen and contentment increase. Supreme refuge. sole. Grant your blessing that evil. Grant your blessing that I hold the dharmakaya citadel. Grant your blessing that I persevere.
. avoiding the miserable path of knowing much. Grant your blessing that wholesome thoughts arise deep from within. unfailing hope. Grant your blessing that I be able to establish Dharma as my ultimate innermost goal. Grant your blessing that I remember the uncertainty of the time of death. Grant your blessing that I have no obstacles to practice Grant your blessing that the fruit of my practice may ripen quickly.From now on. I supplicate you with devotion and one pointed mind. Grant your blessing that I be able to see my own faults. and vicious thoughts be pacified. Grant your blessing that all conduct with those with whom I have a karmic link may be meaningful. supreme Lord upon whom I rely. Grant your blessing that I see nondual wakefulness.
May the void life-force of samsara and nirvana Both be severed. In the pervasive space of evenness. war. Dudjom Rinpoche. I prayed with one-pointed mind to Guru Rinpoche. Alright?" and left.By means of the great weapon. “Why haven’t you asked about the writing of that prayer?” That next morning. confession of faults.” But although I was thinking of writing one. One night early in Water-Pig year (1983). at once.” Then I thought.
. on the tenth of the waxing moon.H. asking for his blessing in order to compose the prayer. on the evening of the 10th. I said. Without grasping. Then. On the night of the 14th. “There are already plenty of supplication prayers. I thought to write it on the 15th of the same month. “Now you should ask Rinpoche to write a supplication prayer. in the unending great bliss of Nyema’s feast May we always enjoy the activity That is beyond joining and parting. the girl appeared. The girl said. May I attain Samantabhadra’s kingdom in this very life!
Written by H. Later. you must write this supplication. and famine. I should write a prayer reminding the Compassionate Ones of their vows to help beings. There is a great need for it!” So. She said in the dream. when we were discussing the dreams and the prayer. “These days there is danger from disease. I went to sleep. Once again. saying. Indestructible primordial wakeful awareness. “Don’t neglect the prayer that I asked for before. as before. but not enough people who do them. In order to protect people from these dangers.” Rigdzin Wangmo insisted. they liberate of themselves. she appeared again. Jigdral Yeshe Dorje (1904-1988) Colophon This is a supplication. due to the distraction of many events. I didn’t have the chance. and an aspiration-prayer combined in one. saying. Even the word “suffering” does not exist— So who ought to be striving for happiness? In the Kingdom of Samantabhadra Happiness and suffering are of one taste. “No matter whether it’s short or long. my wisdom consort Rigdzin Wangmo had a dream in which appeared a female companion who had often appeared in her dreams. making this aspiration.
Without. in my own dream. although I had actually seen the face of my only father guru. Develop diligence to practice The essence of the teachings. If you wish to visit Buddhafields. boundless equanimity. one by one. I did not forget what he had said. old father of the Nyingma. in circles toward the right. In the end. I had not recognized him. pointing them out to oneself Is a crucial instruction.
The first root samaya transgression: disparaging one’s master. and I understood it to have been advice on practicing what to accept and what to reject. I. Notes The four dharma practices: not returning verbal abuse. Sarvatha Mangalam.
Make them firm in your mind.The next morning at dawn. not returning provocation even though one has been provoked. I was at the head of a large hall like temple. holding a pair of cymbals. making a lovely sound. not returning anger for anger. I was regretful that. you will find Buddhahood. Out of nowhere a young white man appeared in white clothes. dancing as do the Ging. not returning physical abuse. who can gain the siddhi? It is hard to see one’s own faults. and danced toward me. The perfect. when faults are. So. May it be of benefit. excellent Buddhafield is near at hand. He said:
“If you want to establish the teachings. boundless joy.” At the end of this poem. he rolled the cymbals and then crashed them together. spiraling closer and closer. wrote this from my own experience.
. In the depths of mind. removed Enlightened qualities increase and shine forth. After I woke up. with long hair spread out over his shoulders. Jigdral Yeshe Dorje.
The four boundless ones: boundless love. he rolled the cymbals. Purify ordinary deluded attachment. and I awoke. boundless compassion.
Kathmandu. Nepal. 1989 Originally published at Sahayogi Press. 4) the vast inherent suffering of samsara.The four thoughts that turn the mind to Dharma: keeping in mind 1) the rarity of the free-well-favored human birth.
Kyerim: developing stage meditation. 2) the inevitability of death. Boudhnath.
Translated by Bhakha Tulku and Constance Wilkinson. 3) the inescapability of karma. cause and effect. Nepal
. Dzogrim: completion stage meditation.