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Tuesday, April 2, 2013

The Herald

Exercise, yoga may help with PTSD

Tomorrow’s Horoscope
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 3, 2013

HI AND LOIS

By Bernice Bede Osol

Dear Annie: My father, ly ask them to please stop my brothers and I all served crying on me because it’s during Operation Iraqi Free- making me uncomfortable? dom. Only my father and I — Not Grieving That Much deployed to combat areas. Dear Grieving: Unless Dad retired five years someone is crying on you ago and is showing drastic day after day, please try to symptoms of PTSD. He is tolerate what you can, and stockpiling food and medi- then gently extricate yourcal supplies and keeps try- self. Pat them on the shouling to get my wife and me der. Get them a seat. Ask to “prepare” for when “it if they need a tissue. Then all hits the fan.” He spends walk away. You don’t have hours a day obsessively to demonstrate such obvious watching the news and get- mourning yourself. You are ting angry at the right that everyone television. Our grieves differently, children used to and you are not spend time unsuobligated to put pervised with my on a show. But it parents, but that would be useful stopped when I to learn how to found a loaded convey sympathy handgun in his to others, whether bathroom cabinet. or not you believe My mother has they deserve it. broached the topic Dear Annie: I of therapy, and was surprised to I’ve offered to go Annie’s Mailbox learn that people with him, as I’ve register for housebeen wrestling warming gifts. I with some mild PTSD is- thought housewarming gifts sues myself. But my broth- were something simple like ers intercede every time and a loaf of bread, a bottle of say Dad’s fine and it’s no wine or flowers. A neighbor big deal, and they convince brought me a cutting from a him not to go. I believe this cactus that has bloomed on is dangerous. I’ve been un- time for more than 40 years. able to find any home counMaybe I’m old-fashseling services, and even ioned, but I thought you furour pastor says this is out of nished your house yourself his realm of expertise. What as you were able over the other options are out there? years. — Canaan, Conn. — New York Son Dear Canaan: Most Dear Son: You may have guests bring gifts to a housebetter luck getting your fa- warming. A registry is a bit ther to accept help if you much, but there is nothing approach this as a possible wrong with having a friend medical problem, rather or relative make suggestions than a psychiatric issue. We when asked. also suggest you ask him to Dear Readers: We are join you for an exercise or carrying on Ann Landers’ yoga class, which can be tradition that April 2 be set useful for some PTSD suf- aside as Reconciliation Day, ferers. Also, please contact a time to make the first move the VA’s National Center for toward mending broken rePTSD (ptsd.va.gov) or Mili- lationships. It also would be tary One Source (militaryo- the day on which we agree nesource.mil) at 1-800-342- to accept the olive branch 9647, and ask to speak to a extended by a former friend counselor or get a referral or estranged family member to local military treatment and do our best to start over. facilities. Dear Annie: My maternal grandparents passed within months of each other. My mother hated her parents and kept them away from us. I never knew them well. I’m in my late 20s and have never been an emotional person. I went to my grandparents’ funerals out of respect, but my sister went overboard, sobbing and moaning during the service even though she knew them less than I did. For weeks after, she emailed and texted me saying she couldn’t sleep and that she’d never “fill the hole” the loss represented. My sister and my parents say I’m heartless because I didn’t respond this way. My mother actually upbraided me for not weeping sufficiently. People grieve in different ways. How do I nice-

Endeavors that you share with friends in the year ahead will be successful, as long as you allow everyone to do his or her part. It should be a fun and profitable ride. ARIES (March 21-April 19) -- You are always desirous of acknowledgement, but you could crave it more than usual today. If you don’t get it, don’t make a big deal about it. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) -Even though you’ll take most of your involvements seriously, you’ll still be philosophical about their outcomes. This attitude will help you handle whatever occurs with grace and aplomb. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) -One of your greater satisfactions will come from working with another on something of mutual importance. Enjoy the productive relationship. CANCER (June 21-July 22) -- It is advisable to get your mate’s opinion before making a major decision. They may have ideas that surprise you. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) -- Don’t think that you won’t feel guilty if you fail to use your time productively. Get rid of your excuses and do the right thing from the get-go. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) -Business and pleasure can make a compatible mix, provided you have respect for both and split your time between the two as circumstances dictate. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) -- The possibility for doing what you set out to is very strong, provided you sustain your motivation. Keep your motivations in the forefront of your mind at all times. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) -- If you get into a situation that is too narrow or constricted, you could be extremely uncomfortable. Don’t allow others to put restrictions on your movement. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) -- The best asset you possess is your ability to make the most of whatever you are dealing with. This is especially true with financial matters. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) -- Treat your colleagues with respect, but don’t let them take over something that you’re already handling adeptly. You’ll find a way to set boundaries respectfully. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) -- If you have to work on something that requires deep concentration, do your best to find quiet surroundings. Noise, disruptions or interference will negatively affect your performance. PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) -Because your aspirations are likely to be more practical than most people’s, the possibilities for realizing your hopes are correspondingly greater. COPYRIGHT 2013 United Feature Syndicate, Inc.

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