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Bob Dylan Jokes (Expecting Rain Website) The freshest ones are around the bottom (of the page

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From: Jeremy Heist JHeistUpCa aol.com I've always rememebered and quoted this line from a Dylan concert a long time ago--it was in Tucson, & might have been Rolling Thunder. He introduced the back-up singers as "My ex-wife, my next wife, my girlfriend, and my fiancee." I'm trying to remember if there were even four different women, or just three.

Somewhere in 1997: From: Tom Burstein tburstein email.msn.com I saw Dylan at Western Connecticut State University in 1997, I believe. When he introduced Bucky Baxter he said, "When I first met Bucky, he didn't have a penny to his name. I told him to get another name."

Date: Tue, 11 Apr 2000 15:35:56 -0700 From: Brian b8kdnapi pacbell.net Subject: bob funny I don't know if you have heard this funny thing bob said or not but when I saw bob, I think was in was 95 in san diego, he introduced the drummer with a big afro and said something like, "Some people say he looks like Ice T", then after a pause he said, "I don't"

February 13, 1999, in Normal, Illinois (Illinois State University campus), From dono919: "They said I'd never make it to Normal. (PAUSE) They were wrong."

December 8 1997, Irving Plaza From HALBERT fordham.edu: the best joke i have heard dylan mumble at a concert was in new york city at irvingplaza december 8th 1997, where the opening act was joan osborne who

. 1999.. Concord. and it is a small place...... Hollywood....sang the man in the long black coat. 1999. 1999.. "I don't have that brass bed anymore.maybe two thousand... ...I never did have one. there was a fork in the road. saying that "I almost didn't make it tonight." June 22.. CA Marc Blaker reported: At Shoreline after the best Lovesick I've heard Bob says.. They're all love songs." Richard Shaffer posted the first collection on July 9........ 1999. when dylan says: "but not tonight. Mountain View..." Bob said." and joan in the back stands up to come to the stage. after singing her set she was at the bar drinking.dylan had just finished his first seven..... The band loves to play them... June 19......all of a sudden he says: "and i'd also like to thank joan osborne. Chula Vista. CA CovWoman61 wrote: He apologized.... CA From: Linda Povey After playing "Lay Lady Lay... had a flat tire... 1999." June 25........" .... CA Brian posted: He made reference to how tired he and his band were "We slept in a trailer park and didn't want to wake the sleeping bags" Jun 18.... joan and i is gonna sing a song..... songs and was introducing the band and thanking the opening act...... "(sarcascm dripping) that was a LOVE song. . eight.

1999.. I says 'sure you just. He was laughing a lot and even told a little joke. (a decent pause) you just need to stick your radio in the refrigerator. 1999. She was an artist. I was talking to Neil Young yesterday (audience cheers at the mention of Young) and he said to me.COM wrote: "I was born on the hill over there. 1999. we saw his show in Vegas and he seems very friendly. he said 'Bob. you just can't hear cool music on the radio anymore." . NV Spflpete wrote: Last Sat. MI MSGLBJ wrote: Here he paused and caught his breath.. Skakopee. 1999. Detroit. July 3. WI stuart levitan wrote: "Nice to be here. BobLinks wrote: "This is a song I wrote for my ex-wife... 1999. You know. her Mimi.. Duluth." Glad to see it's still there. Phoenix. you're too kind." July 6. Milwaukee. MN kara50 MY-DEJA. She was so conceited I used to call her Mimi" June 27. One of my early girlfriends was from Milwaukee." July 2.' and I says to Neil.COM wrote: he said he had to 'get a hammer and hit the sack'. AZ Jordan wrote: "Thanks everybody. She was so conceited I used to call July 4. then stepped to the mic and said "Thank you very much Ladies and Gentlemen. She gave me the brush-off. My first girlfriend came from here. MN kara50 MY-DEJA. Las Vegas. 1999..June 26.

1999. ." July 10. and he asked him how can you listen to rock and roll .. 1999.we were woken up by the burglar alarm. David's first jobs was here in Chicago. IL BobLinks wrote: "David One of He had He was Kemper is playing on the drums." July 14." July 9. but it July 11. He almost made it to the show..He paused and then leaned back in. Maryland Heights. 1999." (Cheers) "I was looking for the Smokey Robinson stuff. Cincinnati Joe Cox wrote: "Charlie went to see his cousin today at the Hamilton County Jail.yeah . Tinley Park. 1999. They had a robbery there . I never did find the Smokey Robinson stuff though.." July 13.. Va Beach Joy wrote: "We were all woken up very early this morning here at the hotel.. This guy came up to me though and he said What did Clark Kent turn into when he got hungry?' I said What?' He said Supperman'.Neil told him "You put a stone up to one ear and a hamburger bun to the other" (rimshot). I couldn't find it. "I went to the Motown museum today.. 1999. Raleigh BBowser868 wrote: "Larry was talkin' to Neil Young. He brought him a cell phone." He wrote a song about his bed. a job as a waiter but he never took any tips. a dumb waiter. hasn't been made up yet. Missouri Joy wrote: "Larry almost wrote a song today.

" "My ex-wife left me again tonight. We love to play it. David's turning 21 tonight. July 16. it wasn't Neil Young." Late show. Love means nothing to her. Robert Fisher sent in this one. 1999. She's a tennis player. Dylan said: "David and I drove here tonight in a car singing songs on the way. New Jersey J. hasn't been made up yet. 1999." July 17.She's a tennis player. it was Elvis Costello".Then a few moments later he stops before introducing Charlie and says "No. We were singing cartoons. David Kemper. 1999. Rutherford. Hartford BobLinks wrote: When introducing the drummer. Camden BobLinks wrote: "This is a love song." He wrote a song about his bed. 1999. 1999. E. Bristow Joy wrote: "My ex-wife left me again. David never lies unless he's in bed. but it July 25." November 13. Albany Brian Perry wrote: "Larry almost wrote a song today. Love means nothing to her. Park West last fall Brooks sent this: . adjusted by Johanna McCarthy: When introducing his band: "David Kemper on the drums." July 20.

umn.Bob introduced Kemper by saying: "David Kemper on drums. Irvine. Tony said it was a pretty good trade. He and Tony couldn't stop laughing. He got a bicycle for his wife.. Rochester." Subject: Anaheim Late Show Joke. 2000) From: Joey Morris Grand Rapids.edu Bob made the following joke while introducing the band: "Tony was here once before. 2000 He told a joke last night at Irvine. (March31. Didn't you. From: LoveMinusZero Date: Sun. From Jennifer Schneider schn0257 tc. 2000.net Last night in Bob was in a great mood. but he stopped feeding him. Something about a roll of film (I think) & "seeing what develops"? Subject: Re: Chicago joke From: JMof523817 jmof523817 aol. 12 Mar 2000 01:54:28 GMT Anyone catch the first half of Dylan's joke last night? Told it as he was introducing Kemper. we had to call a toe truck!" He couldn't stop laughing while introducing the rest of the band." . Tony?" (or something like that) This really cracked him up.com Date: 24 Mar 2000 18:42:04 GMT Bob said "Dave is the only drummer that tried to make a slow horse fast. Mich." (at the Park west late show 10-26-1999 Chicago IL) Fargo March 30.. when he intro'ed the band he intro'ed David as a someone who "was going to be a doctor but he didn't have any patients. huttojb216 netscape. MN. CA June 29. He introduced Larry and said "He hurt his foot today. David grew up on a farm and on Saturday nights he used to take the cows to the moooooovies.

. Camden." Albuquerque.' they told him. Oklahoma City. July 28. Chase thechases worldnet.president of our fan club down here. we'll serve just about anybody.. No one seemed to notice this second one.net Minneapolis . but I simply couldn't stop laughing. about a 1/4 mile from the Target Center. 2000 From: blindjoedeath I'd like regional ago.att. but I'd like to say hello to Miss Linda Lu .. She was down here just a minute they hustled her outta here -..I wish she'd come back -to see her.net Also loved Bob's joke of the night: "David got a hammer last night and hit the sack" and then later about Tony: "He hit the sack too.peace and love..net The funniest thing I ever saw Dylan do on stage was in San Diego. and he asked them 'Do you serve crabs?' 'Sure do. New Mexico.She said "Buddy. at . "He must have thought he was playing golf today because he wore two shirts." From: tim romantim mr.. 7/1/00 From: JHeistUpCa aol..David and I were in the Pickled Parrot* this afternoon and David asked the waitress if they served crabs. ladies and gentlemen. Fergeson" Last night in Oklahoma City. and he wasn't even going to bed". 2000 From: Brian J. sit right down. Bob said.com Introducing the drummer at Del Mar. in case he gets a hole in one. erik Del Mar.. 2000 David Kemper on drums. July 14. July 6.... 2000 From: "Mark A..." *the pickled parrot is a popular restaurant/bar in downtown Minneapolis.. while introducing the drummer.. From: J R Beresford-Howe jrbh pacbell.. "We went out for some seafood. July 3.

& among the standees along the stage was someone madly scribbling notes of some kind. I think there's a phone call for you. too few too mention. Regrets. I've had a few.. it rhymes with Belo Horizonte". 1999. "This is a song I wrote for Garth Brooks. July 10. Winter 1991. Italy. 2001 show During Stuck Inside Of Mobile With The Memphis Blues Again Bob introduced the band: He said something like that: "I would like to introduce the band: On the guitarÊ ." Belo Horizonte.. Then he played "Ain't Gonna Go to Hell for Nobody. 1991 The Telegraph. "He ought to. he responded to a heckler in the audience with: "Hey man.I'm not going to tell you !!! " From: "Donald Winters" winte030 qwest. From Matt Wilson mwilson citizensconferencing.edu Bob D played a club show at Park West in Chicago.. and announced that he wanted to dedicate the next song to them. finally grinned down at the fan & asked: "You writing a check for me?" From Bo: Brescia. 2001 "Does Harry Belafonte come from around here?" Bob asked. Dylan. Issue #41 Michele Simpson sent it to me Jan 15. David Kemper on the drums. August 19. he introduced "Make You Feel My Love" by saying. late '99.Charlie Sexton. On the other guitar . Piazza Duomo.net When I saw Dylan perform at the Santa Monica Civic Auditorium in the early sixties. Brazil show.Golden Hall during his first mixed born again/secular tour.. and on the bass . in great spirits all night.com When Bob shared the bill with Joni Mitchell in Chicago. but then again.." From John Domini jdomini northwestern." . he told a story about a honeymooning couple next door to him at the hotel.Larry Cambell.

2001: "On the drums.com A 2000 show: "On drums.net Morgantown Nov 15. he killed the Dead Sea. we'll see what develops. too! From wvjon charter." Then." Dylan said. 2001) During the band intros Bob introduced David Kemper as "one of the few drummers around better than no drummer at all" Syracuse. he proclaimed. he must be in graduate school now." From Pamela Zilavy During the band introductions at the Greek in Berkeley in October ('02). those are foot notes! David Kemper!" From Kevin Thomson Kevtf1 btinternet. Tony stepped up to Bob and said something or other." . David Kemper!" From Leah Warshah Detroit: "You might be wondering what's written on his shoes. When we played the Middle East. David Kemper. NY Tuesday Nov 13. is "the meanest man in the band. 2001: "I want to introduce my band. he once swallowed a roll of film. All this historic music and a joke from the deadpan man. Then Bob turns and tells us that "Tony says he actually went school here at UC Berkeley.com Saturday night in San Francisco (Oct. Well. the meanest drummer in the world. When we played in the Middle East. after that Bob grins and says. 13. Veteran guitarist Sexton." Dylan said.From: "Bill McGirr" billmcgirr hotmail. Charlie killed the Dead Sea. The best band in the land.

Dec 5 2003 Bob in Athens Georgia. Fuzzy Kozzela (thats how he says the name). He'll just have to get used to it. under his bed... 2004 In Columbia: On the guitar. April 11..) I swear it's true!" From Hamp Nettles.music. a man that comes froma broken home.on the stage. maybe a little drunk?. Smith III. what about the smell? Larry said. maybe gourmet cooking.. says. I asked Larry where he was gonna keep his pig. and he wore two shirts..... From timebandit15 hotmail. CT Bob introduced his drummer as "George Recile from Hartford.. And about George: George is the. probably the best drummer.. he said."Hey it's nice to play for a college crowd.did you know that Billy Joel never graduated high school. Kansas City When Dylan played in Kansas City at the Sandstone Amphitheatre in the summer of 2001. University of Georgia.. ." Posted to rec. His kids break everything in the house. CT.. he said this joke about his drummer: "We went golfing this afternoon. I said.. From: Matt Wilson...... Nov 13 2003 In Wallingford. 2003 and at Costa Mesa July 27) he told this joke on Larry: Larry bought a pig the other day.." From Tim Tankard..." When no one in the audience seemed to care that his drummer was from Hartford Bob pointed at George and repeated "George Recile from Hartford.dylan by Debra Lind At Jackson (July 15. Early 90's.. CT." When no one still seemed to care Bob looked at George with a big grin on his face and said "You're from Hartford..com after that he said. In case he got a hole in one.(laughing with the band. "I don't know what he majored in though. right?" From Chester A.

. Got cows there. From Geoff Stacks: November 3. He runs a farm just outside town. 2004 ..From Deborah Woods June 4 ... George Recile... June 29." From Cori Jones: In Jackson TN on August 20 2004: Bob Dylan introduced his drummer as a guy who there wasn't nothing he wouldn't do for me and there's nothing I wouldn't do for him. Indiana: He's from Louisiana.' .De Kalb.on stage.. From Dave: October 31. 2004 In Portland. Maine 11/23/2001 Bob finished a song and said "I forgot the words there for a minute.West Lafayette. 2004 . The joke went something like this: "Larry was a skeleton for Halloween.I think I hypnotized myself.. No body would go with him. He put one on a scale because he wanted to see how much milky way. 2004: 'On guitar: Stu Kimball. They got a lot of snakes down there." From Juergen Beselt: The Bonn (Germany) show.. he puts them on his windshield and calls them 'windshield vipers'. and we've been going through our whole life doing nothing for each other. Nov 17. Illinois: We got a Halloween joke during the intros.. 2004: Introducing the band: "On drums. Stu's from around here. He's the best drummer . but he didn't go trick-or-treating. When it rains. Kingston.

13. as Dylan presented his band. 2009: . including a Camden-centric introduction for pedal-steelie/violinist Donnie Herron: "They tried to make him go to rehab. no. . or 14th 2004..From Kailin Clarke: Atlanta (April 12." nasalled Bob. From tonygps (2009): In Orlando one night Bob said. "I haven't made it to Disneyland yet. you gotta use paper!' " From Leonard Varvaro (2009): I saw Bob in Omaha a few years ago. "He said no. I don't know which): "Larry was writing to his girlfriend in the hotel the other night. At one point he introduced his friend Doctor 'somebody or other' sitting in the audience." Mojo. April 26. 'Larry." From Matt Wilson: George got a baseball bat for his wife. even banter. "Stand up and take a bow. doc" he said. no. I said. you can't write on an empty stomach. It's the worst trade he's ever made. "okay. maybe later" All of the audience was on its feet at the time. I don't know if I'll ever get there..