could have this from parents perspective, i.

e ghost people in their house that they didnt realise

http://www.thenewagenda.net/2012/10/23/teen-dating-violence-and-abuse-2/ . http://www.tower.com/sexual-teens-media-investigating-medias-influence-on-jane-d-brownpaperback/wapi/100379255?download=true&type=1

http://www.preventioninstitute.sk.ca/sexual-and-reproductive-health/parents-as-sexual-healtheducators

Parents as Sexual Health Educators

Resources Links Young people often turn to parents and caregivers for information about sexual health. Some studies show that talking openly and honestly to teenagers about sex can prevent teen pregnancy. The knowledge base and comfort level of parents and caregivers will differ from family to family. However, many parents tend to underestimate their role as providers of sexual and reproductive health education for their own children and teenagers. Parents and caregivers need to have access to reliable sexual health information and feel confident talking with their children about sexual and reproductive health. Positive communication between parents and their children will result in young people making healthy and responsible decisions. It is also important for parents to engage with their children in discussions about alcohol and other drug use, healthy relationships, mental health, and other areas of concern for youth. Sexual health does not occur in isolation and education in the area must be considered as part of a holistic approach to youth wellness. The goal of the Saskatchewan Prevention Institute is to provide accessible information for parents that would assist them in having meaningful discussions with their children about health related topics, with an emphasis on, but not limited to, sexual and reproductive health. Advocates for Youth Organization has a section called Parents Sex Ed Center that provides information and links for parents regarding reproductive health. http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=108&Ite mid=206 Kids Health provides articles and information on different aspects of parenting including talking about sexual health. http://kidshealth.org/parent/positive/talk/talk_about_puberty.html?tracking=P_RelatedArticle #

A word about teens... It is a normal part of development for teens to pull away from their parents while still being emotionally tied to them.Your teen may appear not to listen to you or will argue with you. Remember that you have laid the foundation for the challenge of adolescence by the values and attitudes you have already taught

your child. Dont be afraid to explain your feelings to your teen and set realistic limits. Let them know you are available to listen to their concerns. Ages nine to twelve Children may: continue sex play and self-pleasuring (masturbation) seek out same-sex peer groups; often tease and chase the other gender start to show signs of puberty be more easily affected by external influences such as friends and the media have fantasies and crushes on people who are their age or older, same gender or opposite gender As your child realizes that their body is starting to change, they may be confused, anxious, excited or have all of these feelings.You can help your child learn about the changes ahead by talking with them. Find a book about puberty at the library or bookstore and read it together. Talking about how you felt when you were young can make your child feel more normal and bring you closer together. Puberty education is part of the Nova Scotia school curriculum. Find out when it will be taught at school so that you can talk to your child about what they are learning.

Public Health Agency of Canada - "Talk to Me" - Sexuality Education for Parents http://www.phac-aspc.gc.ca/publicat/ttm-pm/ This program is mainly aimed at parents of ten to thirteen-year olds who wish to better understand the questions and concerns of their pre-pubescent child, related to sexuality. "Talk To Me" is divided into five workshops focusing on various themes: Attitudes toward Sexuality, Puberty and the Changing Adolescent, Sexually Transmitted Infections and HIV/AIDS, Contraception and Communication. The "Talk To Me" focuses on three different types of objectives: cognitive, emotional and behavioural. These two-hour workshops promote the integration of new insights, encourage reflection and the expression of emotions and further communication between parents and adolescents. 1. Attitudes Toward Sexuality Parents will learn to better understand their own perceptions of sexuality and to evaluate their level of comfort with the issue. They will also learn about the importance of a positive attitude and of promoting discussion between themselves and their child or teenager(s). The parents will learn the importance and the purpose of their role as sexual health educators for their child(ren). 2. Puberty and the Changing Adolescent Parents will become more knowledgeable on the subject of puberty. They will reflect on and understand the host of changes their children go through during this important time and be better equipped to speak to their children about puberty.

3. Sexually Transmitted Infections and HIV/AIDS Parents will become more knowledgeable about HIV and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs). They will learn about the asymptomatic nature of these communicable diseases, their long-term consequences as well as their modes of transmission. Parents will become more aware of the importance of adopting safer sex behaviours. They will also reflect on their own level of risk within their sexual relationship(s). 4. Contraception Parents will become more knowledgeable of the different methods of contraception contraception and the benefits of dual protection. They will have a chance to discuss each method and explore the advantages and disadvantages, as well as what may make one method more appropriate for their teen than another. The participants will also become more familiar with the main difficulties teenagers face related to birth control methods and will have the opportunity to assess the impact of their own roles and values in matters of contraception. 5. Communication Parents will become more adept at understanding the dynamics of communicating with adolescents. They will also learn more about the necessary principles to respect to help facilitate dialogue related to sexuality. Parents will become more aware of their own limitations and strengths as well as the non-verbal messages they convey in matters related to sexuality. Lastly, parents will be invited to practice this newly found knowledge by completing an at-home assignment with their teen(s). http://searchrecherche.gc.ca/rGs/s_r?st=s&num=10&s5bm3ts21rch=x&st1rt=0&langs=eng& cdn=phac&q=talk+to+me&Search=Search http://www.phac-aspc.gc.ca/publicat/ttm-pm/attitudes-eng.php Goal This workshop will help parents to become more approachable to their teenagers in matters of sexual health. Specific objectives: By the end of the workshop the parents should be able to: 1.1 Associate different elements with sexuality; 1.2 Identify the positive aspects of sexuality; 1.3 Explain how their own perception of sexuality may influence their attitude. General objective #2: Throughout the workshop the parents will learn to assess their level of comfort when discussing sexuality with their adolescents. Specific objectives: By the end of the workshop the parents should be able to: 2.1 Be aware of the aspects of sexuality they are most bothered by; 2.2 Name the most sensitive issues; 2.3 Identify the causes behind these difficulties. Specific objectives: By the end of the workshop the parents will be able to:

2.1 Give examples of positive attitudes related to sexual health education; 2.2 Name some attitudes to avoid; 2.3 Become aware of their own attitudes, both positive and negative. He/she explains that sexual health education is a natural part of teenage development and that it teaches the adolescents to better handle their emotions and to resist peer pressure. The facilitator distributes a copy of annex #1 to all participants and asks them to write any and all words they associate with sexuality inside the bubble without censoring the content. Annex #1 Sexuality is ..

4. Sexuality. negative or positive? Once annex #1 has been filled out, each participant is given two pens of a different colour and asked to circle those aspects he/she considers positive in one colour and the negative ones in the other. This way each person gets a quick overview of his/her own perceptions of sexuality as a rather positive or negative force. The facilitator asks the parents to take some time to reflect on their list. He/she then explains the different sexual approaches (annex #2) and leads into a discussion based on some of the following questions:

Does your list reflect a more positive or negative view of sexuality? Do the colours on your list surprise you? What do you think of your list? What influenced your choice of words? (Your values, education, experiences, present situation, etc.) Is there a specific theme to the items on your list? (Mainly biological, psychological, emotional, hedonistic, moral, preventive, humanistic, etc.) How could your perception affect the way you approach your adolescent in matters of sexual education?

The facilitator ends the segment by explaining the importance of becoming aware of one's perceptions before discussing the topic. Doing so, as some of the following examples show, would have an enormous impact on the way one educates:

A genital-oriented focus may result in overlooking the emotional dimension; A mostly preventive approach may lead some parents to neglect some of the positive aspects of sexuality as well as the real needs of their teenagers; A mainly pleasure-based approach may cause the risks of some sexual practices to be overlooked; An attitude based mainly on the biological and physiological changes during adolescence may limit an understanding of the variety of adolescent concerns.

Length: 15 minutes Corresponding objectives: 1.1 - 1.2 - 1.3 Facilitator's role:

Creating an atmosphere of trust Ensuring that all parents participate in the discussion Respecting the participants' opinions

Annex #2 List of associations with sexuality1 Responsibility Sexual relation How not to become pregnant Erection Ejaculation Contraception Male body Female body Emotions Difficulties Feelings Male-female differences First sexual experience Condom Orgasm Game Sexual orientation Positive Negative Dirty Impure Health Adult Personal Intimacy HIV/AIDS Important

Comfortable Dangerous Risky Pleasure Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) Pregnancy Disease Affection Menstrual cycle Physiology Eroticism Pornography Sin Relaxation Exchange of caresses, tenderness Genital exchange (penetration, ejaculation) Emotional exchange leading to arousal Oral-genital exchanges Channel of expression Frustration Essential Love Need Seduction Obligation Duty

Preventive approach: condoms, prevention, contraception, responsibility, STIs, HIV/AIDS, etc. Emotional approach: feelings, affection, love, etc. Biological approach: menstrual cycle, male body, female body, etc. Hedonistic approach: pleasure, orgasm, eroticism, etc. Moral approach: sin, vice, duty, impurity, etc. 5. Your comfort level with discussing sexuality The facilitator places three sets of masking tape, ten feet long each, on the floor according to the following model:

Very comfortable discussing sexuality with: My spouse

Not comfortable discussing sexuality with:

My friends

My teenager

The first tape shows one's level of comfort when discussing sexuality with one's spouse, the second with one's friends and the third with one's adolescents. Each participant must position him/herself one tape at a time at the place he/she believes best represents the true level of comfort when discussing sexuality within every group. A discussion should ensue based on some of the following questions:

Did you position yourself at the same level on all three tapes? Is it more difficult to discuss sexuality with one's teenager? Do you think that the adolescent feels the same way about you? Why? Who are you most comfortable discussing sexuality with? (Your spouse, your friends, your parents, etc.?) At one time, were you embarrassed to speak to your parents about sexuality? Are you comfortable discussing sexuality? According to you, where do these difficulties come from? Which subjects do you find most difficult to broach? (Sexually transmitted infections, contraception, pleasure, etc.) Do you think your adolescent feels the same way?

To sustain the discussion the facilitator uses the content of annex #3 in regard to the more difficult subjects and their possible causes. He/she concludes this activity by explaining that it is perfectly normal to have trouble with the issue since it directly touches on our intimacy and vulnerability. One of the parent's roles is to become aware of and learn to respect his/her own limits and difficulties. Length: 20 minutes Corresponding objectives: 2.1 - 2.2 - 2.3 Facilitator's role:

Creating an atmosphere of trust Ensuring that all parents participate in the discussion Respecting the participants' opinions Clearly presenting the content Citing examples

Annex #3 What sexual health issues are "uncomfortable" for you:

The idea of sexual pleasure Orgasm Discussing genitals STIs Contraception Physiological changes and differences The first sexual experience Erections Masturbation Wet dreams Sexual positions Sexual practices Homosexuality Conception Feelings Sexual violence Other

Possible causes:

Education Lack of knowledge Discomfort with your own sexuality Values Painful experiences Lack of practice talking about sexuality Intimacy issues Other

. Brainstorming on attitudes toward sexuality The facilitator divides the board into two columns, one entitled "negative attitudes", the other "positive attitudes". The facilitator ensues by asking parents to name positive attitudes toward sexuality, meaning those which are apt to open up the dialogue, lead to a greater candour on the adolescent's part, create an atmosphere of trust, be conducive to the expression of emotions and concerns, etc. The parents must then repeat the exercise with the negative attitudes (i.e. those which tend to lead to resistance, a greater discomfort and a reduced interest in any type of discussion). The parents take turns in writing their answers on the board. Length: 15 minutes Corresponding objectives: 3.1 - 3.2 Facilitator's role:

Ensuring that all parents participate in the exercise

Asking questions meant to ease understanding and lead to the emergence of ideas Remaining silent

Facilitator's instructions:

Informing the participants that they may help each other out Asking the parents to go to the board one at a time Asking the parents to refrain from making comments during the exercise but to reserve them for the ensuing discussion

Required material:

Board Markers/chalk

7. Expos-discussion Once the participants appear to have finished writing their answers on the board, the facilitator completes the information with the help of annex #4. He/she may lead an expos on attitudes to adopt in the field of sexual education. For every attitude presented, the facilitator may invite the parents to share examples from their own experiences with their teenager. The facilitator may also offer examples of positive and negative attitudes stemming from his/her own experience with adolescents in order to maintain a certain level of interest among the participants. Length: 15 minutes Corresponding objectives: 3.1 - 3.2 Facilitator's role:

Offering concrete and, if possible, fun examples Asking questions apt to lead to discussions and exchanges Showing an open mind and a sense of humour Answering questions

Required material:

Board Markers/chalk Annex #4

8. Reflections on attitudes toward sexuality The facilitator asks the participants to determine which attitudes among those presented during the last exercise they:

Have a tendency to adopt with their own teenagers Would like to adopt more often or more easily Would like to eliminate altogether Feel are the most ingrained Consider impossible to apply

The facilitator then opens up a discussion based on these very questions. Length: 10 minutes Corresponding objectives: 3.1 - 3.2 - 3.3 Facilitator's role:

Asking questions conducive to a better understanding of the exercise and the emergence of ideas Answering questions if need be

Required material:

Completed table of activity #7

9. Home Assignment The facilitator ends the workshop by emphasizing the importance of adopting positive attitudes toward sexuality and the impact of negative and less constructive attitudes can have when talking with their children. The parents are asked to pay special attention to the attitudes or messages they transmit to their adolescent about sexuality over the next few days. The facilitator hands out copies of annex #5. The parents are then invited to participate in the program's other workshops in order to further their knowledge and become an "askable" parent. Length: 5 minutes Purpose: conclusion Facilitator's role:

Clearly explaining the assignment as well as its relevance and usefulness Encouraging the parents to carry out the assignment Distributing annex #5

Annex #5 Summary of attitudes2 (to be distributed to all participants) A) Positive perception of sexuality

Presenting sexuality in a positive light as a stimulating and interesting part of life; Avoiding judgements or lectures; Avoiding discussing sexuality solely in terms of disease; Giving adolescents a chance to live a healthy sex life that is not based on fear; Speaking of emotions and sensations rather than offering only technical guidelines; Emphasizing the ideas of pleasure and prevention rather than the negatives.

B) Being comfortable, being honest

Being honest, direct and simplistic when raising the issue; Using the correct terms while showing a certain tolerance; Avoiding vulgarity; Being aware of the influence and the power of your own values on the adolescent mind; Being able to own up to one's limits and refer to other resources; Asking the adolescent to get involved in the search for information or solutions; Being aware that comfort with the issue comes over time and with practice.

C) Availablity and tolerance

Refusing to answer a question considered too personal; Accepting adolescents as sexual beings and not assuming that they do not have concerns or a sex life "at that age"; Being able to listen, to show empathy and warmth and to remain authentic as well as objective; Respecting the adolescents' values while never trivializing their experiences; Assisting the adolescents with their own thought processes rather than just offering suggestions; Allowing the adolescent to express their concerns or emotional reactions and to share information; Using humour to lighten difficult situations.

D) Respecting intimacy

Avoiding talk of your own personal sexual experiences; Giving value and importance to intimacy.

Creating an atmosphere of trust; Encouraging discussions and exchanges; Giving life to values; Allowing for access to information. Oral evaluation The facilitator wraps up with some of the following questions:

How did you feel throughout this workshop? What was your specific interest in this workshop? What have you learned? How will what you learned help you? Please tell me about it?

Length: 5 minutes Facilitator's role:

Encouraging the parents to respond Noting comments to improve future workshops

Facilitator's role:

Encouraging the participants to fill out the evaluation Distributing annex #6 Annex #6 Please complete the following questions: 1. What is one thing you learned about _______________ that you did not know before? 2. What questions or concerns do you still have about _______________? 3. Will you do anything differently as a result of learning about____________? Yes _____ No _____ Please tell me about it:

4. I'd like to tell the facilitator

MORE http://searchrecherche.gc.ca/rGs/s_r?st=s&num=10&s5bm3ts21rch=x&st1rt=0&langs=eng&cdn=phac&q =talk+to+me&Search=Search Iwannaknow.org is a trusted source of information on sexual health for youth and young adults. The website also has information for parents to teach their children about sexual health. http://www.iwannaknow.org/parents/overview.html

Be an Askable Parent
At iwannaknow, we aim to give parents the tools they need to teach their children about sexual health. Sexual health is not just about sex--it includes the roles, behaviors and values people associate with being a man or a woman. Educating a child about sexual health is an important part of his or her healthy development. Their early understanding of sex, love, intimacy and their own sexuality can help mold their values, behavior, and even their selfimage, for a lifetime. Does your child feel it's ok to talk with you about sex and sexual health? If not, have you thought about who will answer your child's questions? Only you can tell your child that it's okay to ask you questions. You want to become askable! After all, you are your child's first and most important teacher. Loving and caring parents actively discover a child's needs for information and then find ways to fill those needs. Even adolescents in their mid-teens are still learning from you. Here are some traits of an askable parent. Which phrases describe you? An askable parent:

Shows respect, value and love for children. Realizes that every difficult situation is not a crisis. Wants communication, but doesn't expect to have all the answers. Knows the most important part of communication is listening.

Doesn't laugh when a child asks a question, even in reaction to the child's cuteness. Doesn't expect to be perfect, and knows that admitting mistakes is a valuable lesson for the child. Is sometimes embarrassed by questions about sex but acknowledges the discomfort and explains it to the child.

Children are more likely to talk to an approachable parent. If you think the traits above describe you, then you are very askable.

Talk Sex is a brochure created by Nova Scotia Office of Health Promotion and Protection to help parents talk to their children about sex. http://www.gov.ns.ca/hpp/publications/11001_talksexpamphlet_dec09_en.pdf

Scholarly articles for SEXUAL HEALTH PARENTS ADVERTISEMENT http://scholar.google.co.nz/scholar?q=SEXUAL+HEAL TH+PARENTS+ADVERTISEMENT&hl=en&as_sdt=0&as_ vis=1&oi=scholart&sa=X&ei=zE2MUcjFNquTiQfEpYDA Bw&ved=0CC4QgQMwAA