This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue?
By Linda Simmon C.Ht.
Realize Your Full Potential:
An A-Z Guide to Renewing and ReclaimingYour Life
By Linda Simmon C.Ht.
… and in order of appearance: Jane C. Woods Heather Askinosie Irinia Wardas Dawn Abraham Mollie Marti, Ph.D.
… not forgetting Terence Kierans, Cyberspace Virtual Services http://www.virtualservices.com.au for making everything work and look the way it should.
There are so many people without whom this book really would not have been possible. First of all, my contributing authors Jane C. Wood, Heather Askinosie, Irinia Wardas, Dawn Abraham and Mollie Marti, Ph.D., thank you each of you. In addition, Nancy Nolen and my daughter Shannon for proofreading and making suggestions, Toni Ermini for indexing, Pam Mossman and Alice Kaveciyan for moral support when I needed it most. Thank you my friends and my colleagues I cannot tell you how much your contributions, help and support have meant to me. Finally, thank you TK, for keeping me sane with your knowledge, expertise and practicality. If it weren’t for you I don’t know what I would have done.
when given the proper instructions. My goal is to give you the knowledge and tools needed to help you accomplish this change. Do any practice exercise you wish and then immediately after the exercise listen to one of the downloadable sessions you received as a gift. and as such no two people will have the same result from any healing modality. Incorporating hypnosis into any exercise will increase the effectiveness of that exercise. feelings. thoughts and ideas that have worked to help people change their lives. I have included articles and advice from some pretty amazing people. my hope here is to introduce you to a variety of thoughts and ideas that have worked in the past to help people and in order to do that. neuro pathways. the change you are seeking can occur when you least expect it. Each of you is a separate and unique miracle of electrical impulses. Try the techniques and exercises you find here until you find the one or several that resonate within yourself. This will “set” the exercise and ideas into your subconscious increasing their effectiveness. I hope you enjoy reading what they have shared here as much as I have. As I said before. . Give yourself the true gift of allowing your body to completely relax by taking a moment to think about what you have just read and the exercise you have just done then listen to your session. The subconscious constantly and continuously processes information received that you are not consciously aware of and because of this. emotions and perceptions. Keep in mind that sometimes you are not immediately aware of the full scope of the healing changes that are taking place.My hope with this book is to introduce you to a variety of theories. Give your body and mind the opportunity to surprise you.
...................................................42 FREEDOM THROUGH RELEASING TECHNIQUE .........31 EFT (EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE)........................................15 CLARITY AND CONFIDENCE ...................................................................... .......32 EMOTIONS..... AFFIRMATIONS.................................... EMOTIONS.............. ANGER................................. BEREAVEMENT . F................................................................26 DEPRESSION .............................................................................................37 FEAR ................................26 DIETING .......................................3 ANGER ...............35 FABULOUS................................................... ALTERNATIVE PROGRAMS........................................... C..... FOCUS....................................................8 BALANCE ..21 DEPRESSION....8 CHANGE..........................................................................................................TABLE OF CONTENTS A ABUNDANCE..1 ADDICTION ......................... DRUGS TO ESCAPE .......................29 DRUGS TO ESCAPE .......... G...................................................................................................................................................................43 GOALS .................................46 B..........................................32 EFT (EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE).......3 AFFIRMATIONS.................... ADDICTION......... COMMUNICATIONS CHANGE.....................34 ENERGY .....5 ANXIETY ...........................................................................................................46 SMART GOALS ........................... FEAR.7 BALANCE..... D.........2 ALTERNATIVE PROGRAMS ................................................................................................37 FABULOUS ..... FREEDOM THROUGH RELEASING .................................. DIETING..........................................................................40 FOCUS ............................................1 ABUNDANCE .................................. ANXIETY................... ENERGY ................................ E.................................................................................................................... FORGIVENESS.........................................................8 BEREAVEMENT ....................18 COMMUNICATION .......................................................... CLARITY AND CONFIDENCE...............................................................
....................... P..................................................................81 PHOBIAS ........70 MIND-BODY CONNECTION..... MIND-BODY CONNECTION..............................................................................67 LOVE.........................84 I..................63 KARMA ............................ LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS..... LOVE...........................................................................................................72 MIND SUCCESS .. N................................................................................................................................................................... K........................................................................................................................65 LIFE..................................68 LUCK .............................................................................80 PERCEPTION ..... INTUITION.........................56 JEALOUSY .............54 INTUITION............................................................................................................... HEART FIRE (HRIDAYA YOGA)........77 NEURO-LINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING ........................................................... J................ MIND SUCCESS . M..... KISMET ............................................................................65 LAW OF ATTRACTION ............................................ LIFE..... PERCEPTION.....................54 IMAGERY.............................................52 IMAGERY..................... HEALING...77 OVERLOAD................................................................80 PAIN........................ LUCK .............................................................................. O...........................59 JEALOUSY...................................49 HEALING .78 OVERLOADED LIFE .......................................... Q................................................78 PAIN...................................69 MALE DEPRESSION.............................................49 HEART FIRE ............ .63 LAW OF ATTRACTION...................................................................83 QUANTUM MANIFESTING ...... L...........................................73 NEURO-LINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING (NLP).........82 PROSPERITY ............70 MALE DEPRESSION..................... PROSPERITY ...................................................51 HYPNOSIS.............................................................................................................H.................................................................... HYPNOSIS...... PHOBIAS...............................59 KARMA.............................................63 KISMET ......
............ STRESS (INCLUDING DESTRESS).........101 TIME LINE THERAPY IMAGERY ...............106 WEIGHT........................88 RITUALS FOR SUCCESS .... VISUALIZATION.........110 WOUNDS (EMOTIONAL WOUNDS)............104 VISUALIZATION ................................................ WORDS...............................114 YUMMY LIST .............103 VICTIMHOOD .....................................................................................................122 INDEX ...... BINGER ETC ..... RELATIONSHIPS.... STUCK ............................................................................................................96 STUCK ..................................................................................95 DE-STRESS YOUR LIFE.............................................................................................................89 SELF-CONFIDENCE...117 POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS... iii ........................................... X..................................................86 RELEASING .................................................94 SELF-TALK.......................................................................................... RELEASING............................101 UNCONDITIONAL LOVE...................99 TIMELINE THERAPY ...............................................................113 TWO FUTURES ......................... i.............108 WEIGHT ..... W....................... Z..............................114 ZEAL .............................................R.... YUMMY LIST ....... SELF-TALK....................................................................................................................116 S.............................................. VICTIMHOOD.................................114 YOUR LIFE SCRIPT .........102 VALUE AREAS OF LIFE..............................................................113 YOUR LIFE SCRIPT........................................................ RITUALS FOR SUCCESS...................................... T......................... EXERCISES ..... V....... ii.. U......................................................................................................86 RELATIONSHIPS ...................................................................................108 WORDS..94 STRESS ...............................94 SELF CONFIDENCE.....................103 VALUE AREAS...................................................................111 X SMOKER............... Y...................... WOUNDS .................................... DRINKER...................................................................................
Perhaps it is easier to place the blame for all the negativity in our lives on someone or something else thereby abdicating any personal responsibility whatsoever. occurrence. money and success. even worse. a life that is rich and full. we can get used to feeling frustrated and it is easy to imagine and slip into the negative thought that we will never get the chance to indulge ourselves in activities that we want to do or live the life that we’ve dreamed of. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. love. The future. but in reality you have the power to take control of your thoughts and perceptions and live the life you dream of. usually as a result of fear. and it is this very ability that may be the most powerful tool each of us has at our disposal to shape and guide our present and our future. As a result. Life often requires us to do things we don’t want to and things we don’t enjoy doing. ANXIETY ABUNDANCE Abundance isn’t just about money or possessions.net 1 . Maybe it’s time to get rid of it and live the life you were meant to live filled with prosperity and abundance. Even when we know we have this tool. fulfilling and joyful life that is filled with everything you want and desire but especially. we can start to believe that it is our destiny to feel frustrated and dissatisfied to such an extent that when an opportunity for change does come along. ALTERNATIVE PROGRAMS. having an abundant life means you are living a rich. satisfying. it is filled with laughter. excitement and yes. ANGER. your future is a place that you are creating each and every moment of each day. Whether we consider ourselves to be happy or sad. At the core of an abundant life is the ability to control and direct your thoughts. Your life does not have to be determined by the whims. think we are making progress or stagnating. we don’t trust it to be real.A ABUNDANCE. You create your reality each and every day with your thoughts. Fear of change. sometimes we simply choose not to use it. incident. we’ve gotten so wrapped up in survival that we just don’t see it or if we do see it. AFFIRMATIONS. It is our perception of any event. In order to make changes. addictions and negative behaviors of those around you or even your own past. however. ADDICTION. © Copyright 2003. activity or situation that determines whether we consider it a positive or negative experience. Because of this. have feelings of joy or hopelessness. fear of failure. Maybe you’ve carried that old baggage around long enough. you need to look at the limiting themes that have repeated themselves in your life. indeed. fear of success.
. cocaine. which is basically an association that has formed around the ritual of the activity. statistics show that only about 5% of the population successfully beats their addiction through 12-step programs. As unpopular and harsh as this may sound. if you or someone you love have tried 12-step programs and not been satisfied with the results. who you can call when you feel you might slip. It is our desires that keep us alive and magnetic. so. Do something regularly and you develop a habit. People without strong desires slowly whither away. It is this flow of desire that creates a vibrational tempo within you. alcohol. to find a support group of people who don’t judge you. At the end of this section on addiction I will give you information on several other programs that have a higher success rate. Your first step. in reality this simply is not the case for the majority of the population. or who will encourage you to go through the steps you need to in order to be successful. the more vibrant and alive you become. The drug they choice to use deadens the feeling. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Allow that desire to flow through you. The key is to find the program or system that works best for you and it may not be what has worked for anybody else that you know.The reality of this world we live in is that desire is the life force of energy streaming through us. ADDICTION The belief that addicts simply have an allergy to their drug of choice. living only shadow lives of who they were and who they were meant to be. If you do not take the © Copyright 2003. A tempo that is magnetic. no matter what program you are going through. and life just gets better and better. at least for a while. Choose to control your vibrational response to anything and anyone and you change your life. Something so painful that they believe they cannot stand to feel the pain for one moment longer.net 2 . heroin or whatever is not only wrong. helps them suppress the pain. Frequently this choice was made because of something in their past that they are running away from. Unfortunately. the fact is that the majority of people who become addicts made the choice to become an addict. however. it can be a very dangerous belief to hold. the more connected you feel. keep doing that habit and you develop an addiction. Twelve step programs can be a tremendous help. you do have a choice. It is important though. Each of you is unique and that is the real key to success with anything you do. While it may be true that a very small percentage of the population who take that first step just keep going apparently having no control over it. at least while they are using their drug.e. Unfortunately while a person is “high” they are in a super suggestible state and that strengthens and intensifies the associations and triggers that are being formed with each occasion of use. i. if you truly want to be successful must deal with the initial pain. The more you allow the energy of desire to flow through you. however.
habitdoc.practicalrecovery. will indeed spend the rest of your life having to take it “one day at a time”. You do have the power to fight it! AFFIRMATIONS Affirmations are a powerful tool to have in your arsenal for any self-help and selfimprovement work that you want to do. if it is not done. However. it is learned behavior and you are not powerless to fight it.time and make the effort to heal that initial hurt. You can become a non-addict and never look back with the right help.” Brisa Zas ALTERNATIVE PROGRAMS: Remember there is no one program that works for every person just as there is no one therapist or doctor for everyone. the underlying need to use is removed and the program you have chosen to help you can then be truly effective. then you.secularsobriety. The sooner we realize and accept that.org www. don’t really use affirmations in the best way possible. We all have special needs and requirements and no program or expert can fill them for all of us. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. but you don’t have to. When you face this pain that you have been running from. you will forever remain an addict. here are some suggestions for working with affirmations: © Copyright 2003. We are living the life we were meant to live with all the joys and sorrows and lessons and fun. so. you will never have control of your addiction and will always face the possibility of slipping. A friend of mine once told me. www.net 3 . the addict. “None of us can compare our lives to others because we aren’t living their life. but sometimes in order to do that it has to be faced and this isn’t an easy thing to do.com The major difference between these other programs and AA is the belief that your addiction is not a disease. I agree with this school of thought. Here are a few alternative programs for you to consider if you are not satisfied with what you have been doing or where you have been going. The mind knows it has to be resolved and healed. Many people. though.com www. and those days actually can get harder because the longer you don’t use. the closer to the surface this pain will rise.com www. If you tell yourself over and over again that you are an addict. the sooner we can learn to love ourselves and our lives.passagesmalibu.
be clear and exact about the reality you say you want. When you do this.” Or say. actually take a moment to visualize what you are saying or writing.” • State your affirmations in the positive.” Or “I will lose weight. • Revise your affirmations often and as needed to make sure they fit your current desires and goals.• Say and/or write your affirmations out several times a day. You want your subconscious to believe without a doubt that it is happening right now so use phrases like “I am a non-smoker” or “I am 20 pounds thinner and fit.” • Your affirmation should make you feel as if you just got a small little electrical shock.net 4 . always focus on what you want to move towards. Affirmations work best when you visualize the reality for yourself each time you use them. then you’ve picked an affirmation that isn’t right for you. the steering wheel of your car. If it doesn’t make you slightly uncomfortable or you don’t feel a little jolt when you first say it. So. Don’t simply say something like “I have a new car”. • Always remember this. So say something like “I am in a happy and exciting relationship. remind yourself to say your affirmations by posting them on your bathroom mirror. then that means you are on the right track.” the message sent to your mind. it is like moving downhill and when you are moving away from things that you don’t want. “I have a new red sports car with a sunroof and air conditioning and an awesome stereo system. but not necessarily that you are doing it right now. • State your affirmations in the present tense because your subconscious takes everything you say literally. “I handle my daily stress easily and in healthy ways” rather than “ I won’t smoke when I’m under stress. If you say something like “I’m going to quit smoking. You’ve chosen something too easy to acquire. when what you really mean is. • Be specific. not what you want to avoid. Don’t let fear hold you back. your refrigerator or anyplace that you have to look at regularly.” Think of how much easier it is to walk downhill than uphill. Since your subconscious is such a powerful and excellent tool for creating reality. your computer. If necessary. that’s like moving uphill. If you aren’t getting a jolt then you are playing it safe and letting fear hold you back again. But if it makes you feel a little uncomfortable. © Copyright 2003. This is especially true and necessary as you move further and further away from fear and your goals and desires get bigger and better. You are working to re-program your subconscious mind with new information and positive thoughts. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. When you move towards what you want. Always create an image of what you want in your life.” rather than “I don’t want to be with anyone who makes me miserable again. there is no limit to what you can be or do or have. the reality created is that you will get to these things someday.
immune suppression and possible impaired neurological function and memory. and in small doses can be a good thing. eating disorders. but the damage done to others can take years to heal. Even if we bury anger deep inside. Our body processes both of these emotions in the same way. fatigue. hurt. Not only is this destructive to you. it can be just as damaging. Holding onto anger. In addition. In situations that cause fear. When this is the case. can lead to serious food addictions. The psychological effect of anger can be just as deadly to us as the physical effects. chronic anger may trigger bad habits such as smoking and drinking. A constant state of anger can do real physical harm. alcoholism. drug abuse and depression. So. going from one trauma to the next. People who see themselves as a victim frequently become crisis-ridden. along with mourning. you may see yourself as an avenger.ANGER Anger can feel like an empowering emotion. anger will frequently kick in because anger is a far easier emotion to experience. shaking. hostility. Research studies have tied chronic anger to various diseases linked with a weakened immune system including coronary disease and cancer. coldness and putdowns to attack anyone you feel has deserved it. When a relationship ends. looking for justice and revenge. The physical response to anger is similar to that of fear: dry mouth. It can even be linked to suicide and increased workplace injuries. resentment. anger is the most common response. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. although they are processed through our conscious and subconscious minds differently. When this occurs it is far too easy for you to then become the perpetrator using sarcasm. Some of these are increased blood pressure and hormonal changes that are directly linked to cardiovascular disease. you may blame others for your situation or condition. feeling powerless and never facing up to your part in contributing to your situation or condition. (See Words and Sound Therapy) © Copyright 2003. If you don’t see yourself as a victim. But some people seem to be angry all the time. fear and guilt has very specific physiologic consequences.net 5 . cold hands. then anger becomes a serious health risk. We feel that somehow we have failed ourselves or have been humiliated either by something we ourselves have done or something that was done to us by another. You can become narcissistic and only care about your feelings. The same thing applies to guilt and hurt. If you see yourself as a victim. crying. what exactly does make us angry? How about loss of our self-esteem. and heart palpitations. You may feel self-righteous and justified in attacking anyone you feel has done you harm.
many of the related diseases that were found in a much higher percentage in men are rising in women as they experience higher and higher levels of anger. and stubborn. expressing your anger in an indirect way. These gender roles are rapidly changing and women are more and more expressing their anger openly. Unfortunately. © Copyright 2003. With enough practice you don’t even have to lay down or close your eyes. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. bitterness. and can lead to serious food addictions. and if you want to take a proactive approach to anger. Studies have tied chronic anger to diseases linked with weakened immune systems (perhaps resulting from anger’s escalating effect on stress hormones). If you feel powerless. you may turn your anger into self-criticism that in turn can lead to depression. You don’t need to be held hostage to your anger. When I say “forgive” I mean letting go. fear and hurt. and can help make you more content. chronic anger may trigger bad habits such as smoking and drinking. cancer. Women were not given that same benefit and as a result are more apt to turn their anger into selfcriticism or turn it inward. It will sit and fester and slowly but surely destroy anything good in your life. People who feel that they are in control of their lives experience less anger than those who feel powerless. alcohol and drug abuse. read Hridaya Yoga and practice the visualization exercise I’ve given you there. A growing body of research increasingly shows the connection between constant anger and disease. Power and anger are frequently related. releasing your anger. You could find yourself intentionally irritating. society tended to allow men to express their anger openly.net 6 . suicide. that perhaps the strongest poison to the human spirit and body is the inability to forgive oneself or another person. however. and depression. but anger that may be directed at you by others. Counseling can help you from falling victim to your own anger. you will be able to bring up the images when you need them most. In the past. and even increased workplace injuries. Remember. you may express your anger by becoming passive-aggressive. not only the anger you might hold within yourself. it will never go away. It is an imagery that with a little practice you can do anyplace. Forgiveness is different than saying “I lose” or “I was wrong” and it does not mean that you will ever allow or condone the behavior or injustice to occur again. This is that negative self-talk that can fill your head with things like “what if” or “if only”. coronary disease. By not dealing directly with your sources of anger. The type of thinking which can undermine your self-confidence and take all the joy out of your life.In situations where you feel discounted and ignored. forgiveness is letting go of your own suffering and your own pain and it is an ongoing process. sarcastic. Also.
shakiness.). an individual can start to associate those symptoms with that specific event and a vicious cycle ensues.ANXIETY Anxieties and fears generally develop from an unknown primary cause through an association with something else. If these emotional and physical symptoms are associated with any particular event (such as going outside.net 7 . Also. The trigger (which is usually non-threatening itself) is frequently buried in the subconscious and over time an association with the fear or anxiety develops later at a moment of extreme stress or suggestibility. By reducing hypersuggestibility with the aid of hypnosis and then using suggestions that they will no longer experience the fear or anxiety that has been bothering them will eventually relieve or eliminate the phobia. being home alone. It is important to remember that we all experience periods of stress and anxiety on a daily basis in one form or another. As more and more doctors and patients are beginning to recognize that mental states and emotional and physical well-being are connected. These fears and anxieties tend to develop in adulthood and the person suffering from them can feel vague and unclear about how they stared and are aware that their reactions are irrational. By understanding the possible relationship of blood sugar levels to the anxiety and balancing those levels with diet can reduce or eliminate many of the physical sensations thus eliminating one major contributing trigger to that phobia. This also occurs when a person is in an altered state of consciousness due to the use of prescription and/or illegal drugs and alcohol. This is what I mean by hypersuggestibility when that term is used. It is during times of stress that we become hypersuggestible. Fears. flying. nausea. cravings for sweets and/or a general inability to function normally. weakness. phobias and anxieties are one of those areas that lends itself to treatment with hypnosis. Unfortunately in a stressful and uncontrolled environment and in this hypersuggestible state. fear or anxiety. mood swings. Many anxieties show a direct link to a drop in blood sugar which can cause physical and emotional symptoms and may include dizziness. fear or anxiety. © Copyright 2003. The repetitive cycle of blood sugar drops alternating with adrenaline increases (from the fear or anxiety or even simply the body’s effort to balance the blood sugar drop) can create tremendous physical and psychological stress. etc. anything and everything that is heard or observed drops much more easily into the subconscious and then becomes much more influential than it normally would. anxiety. driving a car. hypnosis continues to be used more frequently. if the individual can learn to think of their own adrenalin release as excitement rather than anxiety or nervousness they can remove much of the fear and anxiety associated with the physical sensations of such an adrenalin release. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att.
net 8 . then it would make him happy as well. then he’d really truly be happy. BEREAVEMENT BALANCE Two days a year. Sometimes we need reminders. Just think about that a moment. right? Yes and no. it didn’t work. But not my friend and I simply didn’t know what to suggest. every person on earth experiences a perfectly balanced 24 hours.B BALANCE. And with this clarity most people find the direction they need to take or what it is that will give them joy. It can’t depend on “something” or “someone” outside ourselves. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if each of us could also find this same sort of balance. There isn’t another person. If he could have the girl everybody wanted or the car or the sound system or the job or the clothes or the toys that someone else either had or wanted. Ask yourself does balance exist within you? Or have you become a prisoner of a perceived image of who you are. These two days we all share this equality of dark and light. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. So he spent years studying and reading self-help books. joy and fulfillment are as unique as each of us and what gives you joy will be different than what gives me or anybody else joy. I told him the usual stuff. you know. whether it is your perception or the perception of someone else. No one can tell you how to be happy. let them be a reminder to look inside. getting involved with a church. He told me that he’d basically spent his whole life thinking that if he could just have who or what made another person happy. This was also frustrating for me because the advice I had given him had worked in the past. there isn’t a set formula for finding your joy. talking to friends and counselors and the bottom line was that he still wasn’t happy and didn’t know what would make him happy. a perfect balance. place or thing that can make you happy. Each and every person shares this same experience twice a year on the Spring and Fall Equinox. that happiness must come from within ourselves. The problem was. But then I had an epiphany while watching a great movie “The Legend of Beggar Vance”. Good advice. Have you spent a lifetime hearing how you “should” act or who you “should” be? Someone I loved once asked me how he could find what he needed to be happy. No matter what you hear. Happiness. and I think I might have found at least part of the answer for my friend and those with a similar problem. Why not use the Equinox as a guidepost? Nature gives us guideposts and road signs all the time if we’ll just open our eyes and our minds and at least twice a year when we have an Equinox. There is a line in that movie when Will Smith is talking to Matt Daman and it goes something like this: © Copyright 2003. Using hypnosis to clear away the garbage that we all accumulate over time helps to give us clarity. Twelve hours of day and night.
Whether it’s an emotion. Use them to help you clear away the overabundance of message units. the build up of trash and to help put yourself into a completely relaxed state of mind where healing can take place. Strive to balance the dark and light within yourself. all you have to do is get yourself out of your own way so that it can find you. No matter how hard we may try. goal.net 9 . NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Get out of your own way and let your unique and special joy. you give your subconscious “permission” to fix what might be broken. That means stop analyzing everything so much. I am primarily talking about loss associated with bereavement but © Copyright 2003. but the recorded voice can’t be affected by any of that. helping you to get yourself out of your own way. desire. you are able to open your mind more easily to suggestions. working for you. Silence those nagging voices in your own head that can keep you up at night. They allow you to clear out the old. job or whatever you are seeking. our voice. stop thinking it to death. they allow the subconscious to grow strong. You are able to access your subconscious. BEREAVEMENT Coping with Loss and Bereavement By Jane C. sometimes you just need to get yourself out of your own way so that it can find you. hurt or depressed it will affect our thoughts. fulfillment and life find you.co. feeling. jane@changingpeople. even the words we use. and in doing so. I learned this with my clients several years ago and it is the reason why I developed my recorded sessions. It will. Woods. get rid of the trash and make room for the thoughts and ideas that you want running through your mind.uk Introduction I have written this article in response to requests to offer some support and advice in this difficult area. But even more than that. the right kind of suggestions. happiness. the moment you let it! The easiest way to quiet the chatter in your head is by putting yourself into a relaxed state where you feel safe and comfortable.“There’s a perfect shot out there just looking for you. to balance the light and dark within yourself. They work because the voice you hear isn’t being affected by what you are feeling. lover. This is one reason why this book has also included two free downloadable sessions. Recorded and live sessions with a hypnotherapist whether they are over the phone or face to face work AND they work faster and quicker than anything else. In this state. stop trying to live your life the way someone else thinks you should or trying to live the life that someone else has. if we are angry.” I realized that’s the problem and the answer. This is most effective when the suggestions are being given to you rather than you trying to do this all by yourself.
and it is those common elements I am exploring in this article. And also understanding more can help us offer comfort to others. pushing the thoughts to the recesses of our minds. letting relevant people know. but knowing it does not make it any easier to endure. However. and generally we prefer not to think about it. Listening to the bereaved can be of help as their talk allows the awful fact to become reality. If you are reading this having suffered a loss please accept my sympathies. and in my own personal experiences of the deaths of loved ones.any deep and significant loss in life can produce a similar response in us . And how you experience it on one occasion is not necessarily how you will experience it again. just a little. But by and large we all follow a similar psychological processes. and so on. © Copyright 2003.net 10 . Intellectually we know the end is inevitable but it’s as if our hearts are hearing it for the first time. everyone experiences grief in their own way and what follows is not a recipe or short cut. and the circumstances of the death can have a huge impact on how we experience our grief. when someone has been ill for a long time and we may have already begun our grieving (anticipatory grieving). We’re likely to experience this even if we have been expecting it. for example. Also pay attention to their other needs such as having food in the house. That said. but you are still likely to experience shock as your first emotion. Throughout this article there are also useful tips for offering support to the bereaved. you must do what is right for you. Knowing that our responses are ‘normal’ can be a comfort. To a degree that can be true. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. that understanding some of the processes of grieving and mourning can actually help. If your particular expression of grief does not follow this pattern then that is perfectly OK. I have found in my experiences of working professionally with the bereaved. It is an immutable part of the human condition. expressed in different ways according to our uniqueness as individuals. Once we get to a certain stage in life it is inevitable that we will experience the death of loved ones and have to endure the associated pain involved. Shock Our first response to news of a death is usually shock. If the loss is totally unexpected then the shock can be tremendous. I can’t describe a typical response because there isn’t one as such.the intensity and duration may differ. There is little anyone offering support can do at this stage except just ‘be there’ for anyone going through it. Others less close to events may find this hard to understand and may assume that our prior knowledge has readied us for the loss. When the shock is immense then sometimes the bereaved may actually experience physical symptoms or trauma requiring medical intervention.
recognizing it and naming it.net 11 . and so have begun recording the consultation so that they may listen to it later when they are ready to absorb the information. She noted that part of the process of grieving sometimes involved a sort of plea bargaining on the part of the person experiencing the loss. Reassure them that this is a normal reaction and that they are not monsters for feeling it. The more we try to suppress this feeling the more distress it can cause us as we feel it to be unreasonable. a normal response. We may direct the anger inwards towards ourselves in the form of guilt. we may be compelled to visit the scene.Denial A second common response. is a refusal to believe the news. If the feeling is persisting beyond the funeral it can hinder the healing process of grieving so it may be worth considering some sessions with a bereavement counselor. It may last a very short space of time (minutes) or much longer. In extreme cases this phase of denial can last a while and need specialist help. Often that is enough. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross in her work with terminally ill patients. It may be that the anger then gets misdirected towards those who are offering us comfort. uncaring. If you are offering comfort to someone try not to be dismissive of their feelings of guilt. It is very normal and common to feel anger after loss and. Bargaining A bargaining phase was described by Dr. © Copyright 2003. We may need evidence. Guilt is a common reaction to loss. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. encourage them to try and put it into words and then gently you can help them explore it further. we may need to see the person themselves if possible. when they are breaking bad news to patients. and just plain wrong. Our brains (or maybe that’s our hearts again) seem somehow to want to try and protect us for a little longer by refusing to process the news. we may need to be told several times. punishing ourselves for what we did or did not do. These feelings may be entirely irrational but they are normal. For example. It is helpful if you can share this feeling with someone. if indeed we recognize it for what it is. this anger can sometimes be directed at the person who has died. Some enlightened doctors know. or those suffering alongside us. You may feel shocked by what they say in the depths of their grief but try not to show it. once the first shock waves have abated. This is where someone less involved can offer help. by hearing the facts and gently repeating them when appropriate. “If I do this. Anger & Guilt In my experience this is often the least known fact of the grieving process and the manifestation or appearance of which causes the most anguish. It is unrealistic but again. it will make this news/event/horror go away” even if it is obvious that it cannot happen. that they rarely hear past the initial few sentences. We probably feel unable to share this emotion. disconcertingly. or for feeling angry. Help them tell you their feelings.
it is painful but the raw intensity of it will pass. in Victorian Britain there was a very formal set period of mourning. I am not suggesting a return to this rigidity of approach as we’re all unique and all need to find our own way. You cannot short circuit this process. or have a simple vase engraved with their name which you keep full of fresh flowers as your own private tribute. You may choose to write about your loved one in a journal. To overstep this was considered an act of disrespect. (like marriage ceremonies) so creating some of your own can be therapeutic. how to manage our grief. create an appropriate memorial in his or her honour.net 12 . or take it to a favourite spot and both literally and metaphorically. Once it is written you may decide just to burn it. The absence of it can leave us not quite knowing how to behave. even perhaps depressed. This may feel a bit daft at first but it is your personal ritual so do what feels right for you. When my grandmother died I remember my mother keeping the curtains closed and wearing a black armband for some time afterwards. I sometimes describe it as the bitter sweetness of grief. For example. like fundraising for a particular charity. Or perhaps you could create a scrapbook or photographic collage about the person. There can be comfort too in channeling some of your feelings into a cause that was close to their heart. although be careful not to confuse being intensely sad with depression. but at these difficult times in our lives ritual can be important and help us through. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. if we hadn’t had the sweet gift of loving or caring for someone then we wouldn’t have the bitter taste of grief. If you are trying to help © Copyright 2003. If there is some unfinished business you can write a letter to the person saying the things you never got to say. The wearing of an arm band said ‘I am in mourning so don’t expect me to be as I usually am. Ideas That May Help Lack of these formal traditions has led many to create their own which can be just as valid and significant. and even our clothing. I have lost someone significant in my life’. There are other nonreligious things we can do during this intense period of loss that can bring comfort and help us through the grieving processes. just let it go. for the familiar feelings of security and comfort it brings us. At times of great stress we sometimes turn back to a faith we have grown up with but perhaps abandoned. Humans of all cultures have created ceremonies throughout time to help mark significant events and to recognize that something has changed. was decreed. when our behaviour. At the time I didn’t appreciate the significance of this but those two symbols sent a very clear message to others about what had happened.Depression or Intense Sorrow As the reality of the loss sets in we become very low. If we have a faith the ceremonies associated with this can bring us great comfort as can our beliefs in what happens beyond death. In times gone by we had a much more proscribed way of managing the aftermath of a death.
you have been making progress through the mourning process and making small adjustments to cope with the loss. However hard it is. © Copyright 2003.net 13 . in this phase. we begin to move on. This does not mean forgetting them. This is normal and healthy and does not mean you have become hardened to the loss or are showing disrespect. But actually. Experiment At some point. Mourning is learning to let go of the person you have lost. You may belong to a culture which has a set way of behaving during this time. During this period of adjustment you will have good days and bad days and days when it feels like you are back to square one. Timing The length of time we grieve and mourn varies from individual to individual and circumstance to circumstance. You are probably not eating properly and you may rely on other less healthy ways of trying to numb the pain. Let close friends offer you comfort. perhaps with a guilty stab of surprise. An important part of the process of mourning is learning to live with the altered circumstances that you find yourself in. such as excessive use of alcohol. be it with a handshake or a hug. People want to help but they often don’t know how. Pay Attention to Your Health During the period of grief and mourning you are very susceptible to ill health.a friend or relative through the grieving process maybe this is something you could offer to do with them. and this will of course vary from person to person. Rather you gradually realize that the intensity has lessened. The power of touch can be very healing so maybe a neck and shoulder massage will be beneficial. try to pay attention to yourself and look after your physical needs. If you need a hug. It means learning to live a life without them that is different from what went before. ask them. feeling there is no point. the burden of grief is lifting slightly and you begin to feel a little like the person you used to be before your loss. So. Maybe it’s something as simple as driving a new route or cooking in a way you like but they didn’t. you never go right back to the beginning. we experiment with new ways of behaving. however it feels. You probably won’t be able to look back and say it happened on a particular day. not in any sense. which can be a comfort. you have managed to go a whole half day without that acute consciousness of loss or even thinking about the person. If you are someone who regularly takes vitamins and health supplements you will possibly let this lapse. You may find. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att.
a hand on someone’s arm can convey your sympathies more than words. Again.Possibly you may be offered pharmaceutical help by your doctor. Make your peace with that and all will be well. Helping In Western culture. If you can. We all feel awkward when confronted with another’s pain and it sometimes seems better to say nothing rather than risk saying the wrong thing. Please use the link below to forward it to anyone who might find it helpful. surrounded by people. Anniversaries The year following a death can be full of painful ‘firsts’. Grief can make us feel very alone and avoiding someone who is bereaved only intensifies this. Take that risk and extend the hand of caring and support. Of course. take medical advice. a card sincerely written. but just be aware that there is no magic pill and weigh up your options. so we need to use our discretion. You may decide to spend anniversaries with other people who shared your loss. Conclusion There are no shortcuts and your experience of grief will not necessarily follow the patterns described. The first anniversary of the death may be as painful as the event itself was. that can leave us feeling awkward and ill at ease around people who have experienced loss.” © Copyright 2003. ritual can be helpful at this time. or for you it may need to be a day you are working and busy. try and avoid this as it will only succeed in numbing you to pain. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. it doesn’t help you through the process and there are no shortcuts. or an offer of help with the shopping. Knowing this can help you plan for it. or you may decide to remind no one and keep your feelings to yourself. or just sharing your memories with a sympathetic audience. at work maybe when someone is absorbed in their task. be it lighting candle. But don’t let fear hold you back from acts of common humanity. taking flowers to an appropriate place. her distress deepened by neighbours who had taken to crossing the street when they saw her because they didn’t know what to say. I hope it has been helpful however. I will never forget working with a young woman who had lost her child. You may need to make sure it’s day you are not working. Sometimes it’s not appropriate to mention it directly. Literally. whether for you personally. we have lost many of our traditions around grief and mourning.net 14 . “Everything that has a beginning has an ending. be it taking some homemade food round. or in giving you more confidence to offer support to others. as I have said.
some anecdotal.uk In this article I am going to explore how we react and respond to change and give you some advice that works for managing it .net 15 . Sometimes. almost no one likes it. though it is necessary for us to initiate change in our lives and that can be a very hard thing to do. How to Cope with Change By Jane C. and some simply telling you how to do it.rather than it managing you! The Short Version! There is a massive amount of literature on the topic. This process becomes a bit easier when you incorporate something I call SMART GOALS. Then we start to think about the change and decide to try out a few ideas to make sense of the change. we absorb/accept/integrate the change into our lives and get on with it. You are giving the power to something outside yourself to control your life. Isn’t it far better to be the driving force in your own life? Be proactive in your life. The Stages of Change © Copyright 2003. jane@changingpeople. Woods. Then we realize it is happening and get frustrated and cross as it dawns on us that things will change. make your own decisions and take control of your thoughts to incorporate the changes your want to make. Finally. It’s best to find out who they are and delegate/make friends accordingly. CLARITY AND CONFIDENCE. Sometimes. you are in effect allowing someone or something else determine what your decision or change will be. COMMUNICATION CHANGE This Article by Jane Woods deals primarily with change when it is thrust upon us. some research based. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Just remember this. by not making a decision that involves change and by doing nothing. Use the Smart Goals exercise at the end of the book to help you create your own Smart Goals. Some people embrace change and some resist it.co. We are shocked that our world is not staying the same. This phase goes on for ages or not too long. We don’t believe it is happening and try to ignore it or resist it. The amount of information can be overwhelming and not all of it is helpful! I’ll summarize what most of them say for you here: Change is awful when imposed upon us.C CHANGE. depending on the change. even depressed. depending on the severity of the change. we can get very fed up.
For an hour or two you sit there doing your work in a desultory fashion with no enthusiasm whatsoever. everyone is looking at you and so you sit down and check through your desk to ensure that all your belongings are still there. You did not have any control over this change and you become more and more fed up as you wonder how you can stand it. “What?” you say. apart from the first two) are: Shock Disbelief Frustration/anger Feeling low Experimenting with changed circumstances Going back to being fed up if it doesn’t work. Worse. © Copyright 2003. I don’t believe it” and cast your eyes around for verification from someone else. However. You are feeling bright and chirpy. Other people in the office are nodding at you in confirmation and your disbelief disappears to be replaced by anger. the stages we go through (and we can go back and forth between them. but as you walk into your open plan office you immediately see that during your absence someone has rearranged the room layout and your desk has been moved! Your first reaction is probably one of shock as you start to walk to your usual spot only to realize that it has been replaced by a state of the art photocopier. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. It may ring a bell with you. Finding they are. If you have had to cope with a lot of change in your life recently this might just be the straw that breaks the camel’s back and you may want to explode. A Story Here is a short story about change. One day you arrive at your workplace after a week on holiday.Obviously that is a rather simplistic view but in essence. someone you find especially irritating is now just a few feet away and is already talking nineteen to the dozen to you as you have inadvertently made eye contact and given them permission to speak! Your shoulders slump as it dawns on you what sitting in this new place will be like. you are ever so slightly mollified but then you look up and realize that your view of the door is now obscured. You are speechless at first. What is going on? Someone helpfully explains that they decided on a change around in your absence. Experimenting again Making a decision to integrate the change into our lives. Depending on how important it is to you where you sit you may be more or less angry. You may just be a bit frustrated or you may be fuming.net 16 .
It can be difficult to recall exactly how you felt but try. For example. you realize that you can actually change the angle of your desk which gives you a view of the window and takes you out of eye contact with your talkative colleague. supposing you have had a difficult separation from a previous partner. Once you have your two lines completed to the best of your ability look again and see if you can spot a strategy emerging. You can also put the monitor on the other side of your desk opening up a better view across the office. This exercise will help you identify the many skills you have in this area and you will have lots! © Copyright 2003. For example. as you are idly fiddling with the computer screen. Begin by drawing two parallel lines on a sheet of paper. did it make you sad. one you feel you coped with well and one that was more of a problem for you. no one but you is going to see this. Remember to put down all the excellent things you did as well. The top line is for you to record the actual facts of the situation. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. angry. or confirm your thoughts that the relationship had run its course? Although we tend to follow a pattern in reacting to change it is still differently expressed for each of us.But then.. What were you actually feeling at the time? Try and be honest.and survived! Try This A useful exercise to undertake is to think back over changes you have previously experienced and look at the coping strategies you employed then. As time goes on we experience more and more change and develop more coping strategies.. yes. joy of joys. Underneath is your feelings or emotions line. maybe in June you noticed that you were having more arguments or long silences than usual. and. When you changed schools as a child you probably had to because of age or moving house. or determined to make more effort. So. and by the end of the day you have reasserted a little control over the situation. your lovely spider plant will fit perfectly on the window sill! In a mood of new enthusiasm you make these changes. Sometimes we miss the significance of these and don’t always consciously apply these skills and experience to other times of change. By the time you go home you have ‘integrated’ the change to such an extent that it doesn’t even rate a mention when your partner asks how your day was! You have just gone through all the stages associated with change. What was the next sequence of events and what did you do? Remember to be factual on the top and look at your feelings at the time below. but changing jobs may have been a choice you made so adapting was easier. Use two different colours if you like.net 17 . vulnerable. It can be really helpful to look at two changes. That is a fact to record on the top line. don’t just focus on the negatives. Can you see how you have previously reacted to change in those two lines? Control Something that usually emerges is that we respond better when we feel we have some control over the change.
At first. We feel and react the way we do because of our experiences in life and the uniqueness of us and because of choices we make. But as the sun rises. One may approach it in a positive way. Sometimes. For example. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. As you release and wash away the darkness of confusion. overloaded message units and repressed fears. Obviously. Then. the same event can produce entirely different reactions in different people. something I do might cause one person to smile and feel amused.Mind Over Matter One of the most common things said to me by people experiencing change is that they feel helpless. You Choose Whatever route we take change will still happen. Dawns. however. even if the action from me is the same and they both experience it at the same time. but we can CHOOSE how we will respond to it. you really can’t even be sure whether it is happening or not. This knowledge that we always have a choice is the single most empowering fact I can share with you! CLARITY AND CONFIDENCE What is the darkest hour of the night? Turns out. and therefore our feelings. as the dawn progresses. Were you consciously managing those feelings or were they overwhelming you? If it was period when you were feeling particularly good about yourself it may have been the former. Actually. looking for areas where they can influence what is about to happen. we even notice things that we were blissfully ignorant of before. we start to see scary shadows in the half-light. The same principle applies to you. expecting the worst and feeling helpless and buffeted by events. light washes over everything bringing a clear view and the scary shadows disappear. are funny things.net 18 . you may have been comparing yourselves unfavourably with others. while another may be much more fatalistic. there is nothing that they can do to alter what is happening. our thoughts. about change are of paramount importance in how we deal with it. another to frown and feel aggrieved. They begin almost imperceptibly. our responses to change are individual and personal. We sometimes have a tendency to believe that we cannot do anything about how we feel. the darkest hour of the night really is just before the dawn starts. Similarly with our responses to change. retreating into yourself and not attempting to exert any control over what was happening. ‘It’s just the way I feel’ Or ‘You make me feel so cross’. even if we choose to do nothing! Look again at your feelings line from the previous exercise. © Copyright 2003. no one makes us feel anything. If it was a particularly bad time when your self esteem was low. However.
see the right path. Using your subconscious (with the aid of hypnosis) you can reduce the anxiety. A key element in the equation of a fulfilled life and success is clarity. inept. clumsy. confidence. This is frequently referred to as the Honeymoon phase of a relationship but slowly and gradually after a period of time you find that insults are being directed at you with greater and greater frequency. we are sometimes forced into situations that are just bad for us. you drift into a relationship that seems to give you what you need. Unfortunately. If you are starting to feel anxious. Even in the middle of your own personal “darkest hour”. your subconscious must process every bit of information (message units) received no matter of often it hears the same things and since your subconscious considers everything to be a fact until proven otherwise.net 19 . you start to believe it yourself. When this happens. Giving you the feeling of freedom. given enough time and repetition. preparing yourself so that you will actually recognize what your dream or your goal looks like and you will learn what it feels like to have the confidence. remember “dawn” can and will happen. however. but will actually consider them an order. Sometime we wander into situations that are deceptively debilitating. It is clarity that is crucial to accomplishing your goals. They very gradually and subtly sap our strength and leave us without enthusiasm or energy. © Copyright 2003. you do not need to feel this way. They sneak up on us and are detrimental to our esteem. It is times like this (overloaded and overwhelmed) that you cannot “trust” your instincts. your subconscious will not only use your energy to process these message units. you will find that light will flow into your consciousness and fill your mind bringing with it clarity and a clear view as the scary shadows and fears disappear. This is when it becomes necessary to some releasing work. resolve and clarity you need to reach this dream or goal. relaxation. Be absolutely clear about what you want.anxiety and emotions. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. comfort and clarity that you need to make the changes you want. you can gain clarity and build confidence by creating a powerful. If you hear over and over that you are stupid. Studies have shown that by practicing repeatedly and often short intervals of visualization. a failure or any number of other insulting terms thrown about by a person or people around you (or even by your own negative self-talk). Using that same visualization you can train your mind to recognize the opportunities offered to you. and frequently due to circumstances that we cannot readily change or beyond our control. you are in essence training your mind. Ultimately. apprehension and fear. Hypnosis allows you to quickly and easily speak directly to your subconscious and just as quickly and easily clean out the unnecessary negative message units that have been stored up and acted upon by your subconscious. confused or fearful. it uses your time and energy to process what it hears as a fact first. detailed imprint of what you desire. need or want. For example. want the right situations and get a very clear and strong image of yourself reaching your dream or goal. even our physical health and well being.
Take a look at the business opportunity that just fell into your lap. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. your life becomes yours and it will feel richer and thicker and fuller. Trust that perhaps the time is just perfect. does and will continue to offer you what you need.net 20 . You will feel stronger. you are actually living the life you want. If you want a New Beginning. not just one small part of it! Since I believe that confidence and clarity are so very important to the well-lived life. all of my sessions have some releasing suggestions or imagery included within them. Look at that job offer that comes out of the blue. How did they get this way? Transcendental meditation. you need to be aware. abundance. eating organic food or weeks of silent retreat? They must have done something to have gained this inner © Copyright 2003. take responsibility for your thoughts and your actions. happier and soon you will realize that you have not only taken back control of your own life. by the nature of how it works encourages the subconscious to release and. with clarity. And know that when you make choices that express the real you. realizing your dreams and making it all a part of your reality. It’s the life in your years. get together with that friend you’ve been hoping would call. you always have a choice. realizing all the possibilities available to you. in addition. go to that party you’ve just been invited to. “… in the end it’s not the years in your life that count. mold them and do it over and over again. want and desire. the Energy Muse Have you ever noticed that some people just exude the energy of confidence? It’s as if they have this inner connectedness and knowingness that is solid and secure. Guide them. so. yoga. “The first step in using the power of choice is to wake up! In every phase of your development and growth. Know that no matter what things might look like. (See Snapshot exercise) Once you have taken back the control. It does make a difference. it is a journey. why not make today the day that you take control of your thoughts. As Abraham Lincoln once said. all the directions you can go in and finally realizing that life isn’t just about a series of destinations. enjoy this article by Heath Askinosie.” So live your life fully. confidence and trust. then the real fun can start. Trust that the Universe has. A journey that you can control with a little clarity and a lot of trust. all of your life. Confidence and Seeking Clarity In Your Life by Heather Askinosie.” Nora MacFarlane Hypnosis. I decided maybe you should be able to read what somebody else has to say on the subject.achieving prosperity.
Here it is…Think of a question to which you want a yes or no answer. They have an inner knowledge of self and an ability to completely surrender that we can create life but we cannot control it. I went to sign him in and the sign up sheet had a border of the most beautiful butterflies I had ever seen. look and listen. I was wondering if I should move forward with a particular project so I asked the universe to show me a sign of butterflies if this project was in my best interest. © Copyright 2003. Hours later I went to take my son to the dentist. Remember this is an exercise of faith so if it is meant to be it will show up. But how do we get there? I recently read about this technique in a book and found it to be so interesting and simple I gave it a try. The universe in all its magic is waiting for us to talk. I have used this simple dialogue with the universe many times and my questions are always answered.net 21 . It always seems that when we take the time to slow down. There has to be some logical reasoning behind this state of bliss. trust and confidence are available to each and every one of us as our birthright. There is an ebb and flow in all of life which results in positive changes happening when their time has arrived. I often find a very healing peaceful way of getting connected is laying down on the floor or bed and placing a piece of rose quartz. These people hold the tenant “this too shall pass” in their hearts and mind. It is important not to go looking for your sign. our answers are all around us. yellow balloon. or expect it to turn up in its obvious place.get creative) in the next 48 hours if what you are asking for is in your best interest. malachite or green aventurine over the fourth heart chakra. After these few minutes everything seems a bit more manageable and more in perspective. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. I realized again that communication is key to any successful relationship. Or think of something you want more clarity on in any area of your life. Five minutes of breathing with your eyes closed and feeling the loving energy of the gemstone is magical. Sometimes I do not see my sign in the 48 hours and I know its better to wait for better timing or know that something better is waiting. I truly believe that faith. Completely surrendering control allows a space to be formed inside of us where confidence and clarity can live. COMMUNICATION During the course of giving my workshops on relationships. engage and listen. People who are confident and project clarity of mind and purpose know and trust in something very basic but essential: things will work out as they are meant to. dolphins . Have your question? Now say your question out loud and ask the universe that you be given a specific sign (example: red roses. The problem is that we communicate differently.knowing. courage.
“emotionals” and “physicals” really are misnamed.net 22 . Kappas developed a theory about relationships and people in general called the E&P attraction principal which provides us with a simple explanation of how relationships are formed. The physical personality takes things said literally while the emotional attempts to infer what the other person is saying. cries. Remember that it is the emotional who conceals their emotions and the physical who acts them out. how they can come apart. I discuss this aspect of the E&P principal later in my “Relationships” section. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. These two types. So. however. if you ask a physical if they are cold. That perhaps you are suggesting it is either too cold or too hot for you and that you are uncomfortable but don’t want to say so. Because it is the emotional/intellectual who tends to analyze situations. It is the physical who yells. It is a little later that the problems begin to arise because of the innate differences in the way these two different personalities communicate and relate to each other. among other things. they will answer yes or no. possibly even throws things when angry. First. An example would be. is so much more than simple questions. screams. It also works like radar and you will find yourself naturally being attracted to your almost exactly opposite. people don’t realize just how true this is.I studied hypnotherapy under a man by the name of John Kappas and Dr. the way we communicate with each other. E&P stands for Emotional and Physical and aside from defining our attraction and sexuality. It is the emotional who very quietly sits there and perhaps even insists that nothing is wrong. suppress displays of emotion and think before speaking and the physical/emotional who seems to jump right in. © Copyright 2003. Ask a physical if there are any more sodas and they’ll answer yes and tell you where or they will answer no. whatever when upset. Ask an emotional and if there aren’t any they might very well ask you if you want them to pick some up next time they are in the store or sometimes even apologize for taking the last one or not thinking about getting more when they were at the store. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that this is insecurity. it also defines how we each relate to others and how we communicate with them. but E&P affects. Communication. physically acts out their emotions and frequently speaks before thinking. ask an emotional if they are cold and they will infer from your question that you are really asking them something else. It would be far more accurate to say intellectual and emotional. it isn’t. opposites really do attract. In relationships. rather than answer directly they ask if you are cold or did you want them to adjust the thermostat. why we behave as we do and why we select the partners we do. and how natural and normal this is. enjoys spur of the moment activities. It is also that little something extra that causes the sparks to fly when you meet someone. It is simply the difference between direct and inferential communication.
Forcing us to second guess every thing we do and say. but the wounds that are created by hearing hurtful words (especially when those words come from a loved one) stay with us for years eating away and corroding our self-image. the emotional starts to think that maybe their partner doesn’t care as much. We heal from physical injuries. When that partner talks freely and openly about what they are feeling. The words we choose to use are an even bigger and potentially more devastating part of communication. You had to be strong. Remember though. you know that it is frequently easier to deal with the physical abuse than it is the words that are said during an emotional attack. the physical thinks they don’t care because they aren’t showing their emotions and won’t talk about them. the more the physical pushes the more the emotional withdraws and the more the emotional withdraws. Words have power. If it is natural and normal for the emotional not to talk about those emotions they feel the strongest about. however is just one part of communication.net 23 . causing us to doubt ourselves and our decisions. The first step is to acknowledge how strong you really are.The same thing occurs when communicating. then it would also be natural and normal for them to expect their partner to do the same. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Since we tend to project our thoughts. Conversely. Words have so much power that it is possible for them to not only destroy a reputation. By learning more about E&P attraction and sexuality we can modify our attitudes and behaviors ultimately leading to greater enjoyment and longevity not only in our intimate relationships but in all our relationships including those between a parent and a child and those in the work place. © Copyright 2003. that knowledge is power and this vicious circle can be broken. they can ruin lives. the more the physical pushes. when the emotional withdraws and keeps their feelings inside. you can see how this could be problematic. You had to be amazing to live through all that crap that made you feel like a victim in the first place and to keep on going. For those of you who have lived in an emotionally abusive situation. Also. Both parties can regain what they had in the beginning that made the relationship so special when they understand the differences that make them each special. This E&P communication. feelings and emotions onto those we are closest to. It is the emotional who is uncomfortable talking about how they “feel” while the physical seems to have no problem talking about their feelings all the time. You can decide that you are not going to be a victim. It becomes a vicious circle. but you can take back control and you can reverse much of the damage that was done. Sound too easy? The truth is that it is actually easier than you might believe. self-confidence. You can image how difficult living a life like this can be.
If you are around someone constantly who criticizes you or berates you or even worse. but not only that.] Take the time to remember each and every good thing that has happened to you throughout the day. The same holds true for what you hear.The child who survives abuse is amazingly self-reliant and strong. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. And there are hundreds and thousands of stories just like those that show us. dreams and desires. beautiful heart and so much love to give. eating up those smaller neuro pathways that you have allowed to atrophy and that are unfortunate enough to reside nearby. It is along these neuro pathways that all thoughts and emotions travel. throughout your life entire life. Science has given us the capability of being able to look at and in the human brain while it is working and to actually see how it is functioning. call out for help. I know when you are beaten down it is hard to see any options other than the one you find yourself in. each of us.net 24 . For every negative thought or image that either comes into your mind or is forced into your mind. As a matter of fact. think a negative thought constantly and you develop a neuro pathway for that negative thought that becomes larger. this planet needs you. [Please remember hypnosis is probably the best. bad relationship and can keep on going. leave. keep your thoughts strong. If you are with someone who is abusing you in any way. © Copyright 2003. Make some calls. your talent. Science has taught us that just as we can develop any muscle in our body by “using” it. someone will answer. I’d be negligent if I didn’t address this issue of abuse right here and now. what do you have without you? You need to preserve the miracle that is you. Remove yourself from that situation and run as far and fast as you can. The man who came from a loveless home and can continue to search for the right relationship and woman to love is strong and sensitive with a big. by working it. is powerful beyond belief. intelligence and compassion. This is why “words” do have so much power. it becomes even more important for you to counteract those words with thoughts that you control. Also. But most of all. Take the time and allow your desires to flow through you. The woman who has come out of a nasty. wider and stronger each and every day. You know because I say it over and over again. The second step is to take control of your thoughts. There are options out there and there are people and organizations that can help you get away. Think and dream about your future. But you are wrong. just how powerful we are if we are willing to accept that power and that strength. take the time to take back control and think more about your hopes. find out what you can do. so can we develop neuro pathways within the mind. most enjoyable and fastest way to do this. We are able to watch what happens to the brain as we think different thoughts and visualize different images. Your life depends on it After all.
wife. Saying you are sorry doesn’t counteract the damage that was done in an instant of self-gratification. lover or friend before we utter those hurtful words that can never be taken back. our child. don’t ever delude yourself into believing that it is anything more than pure selfish self-gratification. Vent when you are alone. husband. And that’s really what venting to another person is. But when you are with someone you care about. please take the time to think about the words we use and what we are saying to those we care about. Once said they are out there forever. think before you speak because despite that childhood saying sticks and stones…….Each of us. © Copyright 2003. words can hurt you. scream and yell and swear all you want. words can destroy you. NewBeginnings email@example.com 25 .
depression. yet clinicians have found that approaches which combine medical and psychological treatments are by far the most effective. patients will receive treatment based on genetic makeup. if we want to. DRUGS TO ESCAPE DEPRESSION Even though depressed people may share a common cluster of symptoms such as sadness. pioneer brain/mind researcher and author of The Secret World of Brainwaves…. this doesn’t mean that these symptoms are the result of the same cause.Einstein had more interconnections between his neurons. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. an inability to feel pleasure and a variety of physical discomforts. if your brain neurons were laid out end to end. In fact. conditions and illnesses. thought patterns and thought habits. No one is born with such a brain -. sleep problems and/or exhaustion. Miller goes on to stress.it is created. Researchers like Dr. According to Dr. we are learning that thoughts travel through our nervous system and that we can actually develop new interconnections between the neurons in our nervous system. “… Today’s research has proven your brain can continue to physically grow -. The secret to a lively brain is not your number of neurons . DIETING. Dr.D DEPRESSION. Mood is affected by dozens of genes. we can take control of our thoughts and change them. researchers are pinpointing the genes that are involved in depression. suicidal feelings. that even with the new sophisticated tools and treatments becoming available. Jill Ammon-Wexler. if this work fulfills its potential.it is the diversity of interconnections between those neurons. and just like any other habit.here is what is really exciting: Such an unusual supply of interconnections is not inherited. AND -.net 26 . however. but in essence they are just like any other habit. it is important to cultivate a sense of well-being. Marion Diamond who analyzed Albert Einstein’s brain and found it was different in only one way -. As research continues in this area.… You have billions upon billions of neurons. anger or a sense of helplessness and hopelessness. Most research today is focused on the physiology of depression. Michael Craig Miller in his article “Managing Every Shade of Blue”. This is an area that is particularly beneficial for those who suffer from negative behavior patterns and thoughts. According to Dr. In addition. they would stretch all the way to the moon and back. © Copyright 2003.even into very advanced old age. You may be asking right now just what exactly are thought habits? This is something I’ll go into a bit later.
© Copyright 2003. images and emotions travel through our neurological system along these neuro pathways and interconnections. Unused neural interconnections actually shrink and die. are all those bigger thoughts such as “negative people”. what we say to ourselves. This is hugely important! All our thoughts. What we think. (Such an overload is the mental equivalent of the muscle overload techniques used by body builders to build strong. healthy muscles.use it or lose it. I don’t want to be around negative people. those interconnections then expand and strengthen. What it does understand. But if we actually analyze our thoughts we usually find that what we really think to ourselves is something more like this: “I want a happy. even more importantly. I just want to be happy. “disappointed in my relationships”. And if you manage to ‘overload’ your brain with the right kind of sensory information. it is forced to physically reorganize itself and grow. You can take control of your own thoughts rather than allowing the people around you or your circumstances to control your thoughts. that internal dialog that we all have is treated as a fact by our subconscious no matter how ridiculous. Pretty much it deals with everything you don’t want! It is all about those things that you want to move away from rather than the things that you want to move towards. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. “unhappy”. Think about that a moment. I’m tired of feeling stressed and under pressure. fulfilled life” and believe that we are thinking positive thoughts.” What is actually being said here? Look at it. etc.net 27 . I’m tired of being unhappy or disappointed in my relationships. This is why it is so crucial to say and think about only those things that you want in your life or that you want more of in your life and. You can actually take active control of your thoughts and change the way you think permanently by choosing which neuro interconnections you want to strengthen and which you want to atrophy and die. silly or stupid it may be and processed by our subconscious accordingly. NOT to think about those things that you don’t want. But if you engage in regular mental workouts. We may think to ourselves “I want a happy. though. The subconscious doesn’t register the difference between “do” and “don’t”. Too often we focus on and think about all the things that we don’t want. fulfilled life.Your brain follows the same rule as your muscles -.” It is important to remember that as you change your thoughts you develop and build new and different neuro pathways and it is equally important to remember that unused neural interconnections can actually shrink and die. This expands your mind power into entirely new dimensions of thought and experience….) The right kind of mental overload leads straight into quantum brain growth.
D.net 28 . many people are also realizing that much of their pain. and depression can trigger or worsen diseases in the body. you radiate that truth outward and your entire life is changed. More and more doctors and patients recognize that depression and physical wellbeing are intimately connected. you will find that the positive image or snapshot comes faster and easier and you will also find that those old nasty images appear less and less until they pretty much disappear. Take responsibility for your thoughts. heart disease. Reflect on the positive. Fixing one problem can often help the other. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. People with such afflictions appear to run a higher risk of disability or premature death when they are clinically depressed. When there is negative thinking. You will also find that at first it may take a while before the negative images to completely fade but with just a little bit of persistence and practice. Keep your focus on what you want and what you want to move towards rather than those things that you would rather run from! © Copyright 2003. Ph. subconscious level. it will continue to go on. president of McLean Hospital in Belmont. including cancer. If the pain is not dealt with at that subconscious level. As more and more people are dealing with the effects of depression (20+ million in the United States alone). epilepsy. Simply knowing something intellectually gives you very little power. Massachusetts. Studies have long established links between the incidence of depression and several other diseases. Pay attention to what you are thinking.. on a subconscious level. When you can take a truth and internalize it. So. Parkinson’s disease. so that it can become a part of you on a cellular level. October 18. is originating on a deeper. The “Snapshot” exercise given later will help you accomplish this. “Repeat a positive statement often enough and it will become ingrained in your subconscious” says Adrian Calabrese. Woman’s World. whether it is physical or emotional. “Depression almost certainly has multiple causes that produce similar symptoms.What thoughts you think about most will develop the neuro pathways for those thoughts. You will find me recommending that you use this particular exercise often for many different things. An unhealthy body can lead to depression. give yourself the gift of taking control of your thoughts and your life. reflect on the contrary. stroke and Alzheimer’s. 2005. Bruce Cohen. Use the snapshot exercise (found at the end of this book) to internalize and change your thoughts. with the aid of hypnosis.” observes Dr. 100 times more.
Part of one study. The truth is. we are really only getting part of the story. and the third diet was actually only one meal a day (something I’ve always heard is bad for you). and we are getting it before the facts have actually been verified. The first diet included six small meals a day. © Copyright 2003.net 29 . Chocolate was bad for you. now again we are hearing. Where did this idea that women must look like sticks come from and how has it become such a huge problem. according to the New York Times. they are fat and unattractive! Hey. and they did not distinguish between good and bad fats. you bet!!! Sometimes we are simply getting too much information too soon and too much information on only certain limited aspects of any of these issues. then drug companies hire doctors and consultants as their experts to promote their latest drug whether it be to lose weight or cure depression or fix an erection problem. tests or theories that might pertain to that one issue. well yes but not in large portions and maybe even then we don’t really know for sure. First bad and then good or vice versa so often it can make you dizzy trying to keep up. we automatically think about overweight issues and trying to lose weight. sometimes to death. and of course. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Hospitals and universities send out press releases and publish scientific findings. Marilyn Monroe was a size 12 and one of the sexiest women alive. we just don’t want to do it. is bad for you. then we were told maybe it isn’t. a low-fat diet does not cut health risks in women (a theory that is exactly opposite everything we’ve ever heard). particularly among our young people. scientists and dietitians in the world are trying to keep us confused. then we were told it was good containing anti-oxidants and other good things (especially for women). Confusing. We all know the difference between bad and good fats. especially our young women.DIET Diet/Weight/Confusion Sometimes. When most of us think about diet and weight. First we were told that fat. test or theory. I was reading the other day an analysis of three different diets. because our society (with its dangerously underweight models) has made women of all ages feel that if they aren’t a size 6 or below. especially in the United States. the second diet was only three meals a day. but what about the increasingly common and perhaps scarier problem of eating disorders such as bulimia and anorexia. and in reality most of us really do know what a healthy diet consists of. moderation solves most of the problems and confusion regarding food. any kind of fat. Those young girls and women who literally starve themselves. the creators of each all think theirs is the best for losing weight. never a comparison with all the other studies. but I’m sure it is expanding over much of the world. diet and weight. people. but in addition. it seems as if all the doctors. and these are serious issues indeed. And throughout all of it.
just how can we overcome these physical cravings. So many of us feel as if our lives are spinning out of control and quite frankly. feelings and emotions will allow you to move forward in your life with any goal including weight and a positive self-image. One of my instructors at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute. As they discuss and teach in this workshop.net 30 . “… there are neurotransmitters and brain chemicals that conspire against us to create food cravings especially since junk food temporarily eases stress and pain…. but I’m not talking about just bits and pieces of knowledge. If there is no medical condition causing the problem there is always an underlying issue and more often than not. we can each take the time to do a bit of research. the longer you carry it around with you the heavier it gets. satisfaction. one of the first things I tell them is. It is possible for us to outsmart existing patterns by creating new reward systems for our behavior. using hypnosis to internalize the process even fast and quicker. both emotional and physical. and getting the right kind of support and advice. Especially if that advice is the opposite of everything you’ve heard up to that point. so we tend to rely on fast foods and processed meals from the market. weight issues are rarely just about weight. we simply do not have the time or energy to make a healthy meal and actually sit down and eat it. by taking control of our thoughts. Just as with any weight. we tend to carry around baggage from our past. a lack of fulfillment. awareness and motivation are half of what it takes to win the battle. As we live our lives. We live in a world that is hectic at best and almost overwhelmingly stressful at worst. It is almost always linked to how we perceive ourselves and it is this internal raging of unresolved feelings. it can include abandonment issues. confidence or happiness. Ida Kendall and her partner Pat Dennis have put together a workshop “Eating to outsmart food addictions” and they explain and teach how “food can hook people by triggering the exact chemical reactions triggered in the brain by hard drugs or nicotine. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. With the internet available to all of us. In fact.When a client contacts me about a weight issue. emotions and negative behavior patterns that must be addressed as well as food choices and a healthy lifestyle.” How scary is that? I think we all know by now just how hard it is to kick these kinds of addictions. we need to take the time and make the effort to really get the information. There is much more affecting us and the choices we make. Food addiction asks of us a compelling question: How can our minds overcome what our bodies are telling it to do?” A good question indeed and I’m sure you are wondering right now. © Copyright 2003. and this is just the beginning of issues involved in diet and weight. Releasing negative thoughts. Don’t read one article and blindly follow whatever advice is being given. The good news is that we can change existing behavior patterns. Knowledge is indeed power.
Your pain manifested because of the repressed emotions surrounding the triggering event. You can continue the work on your own.e. drugs or alcohol seem to provide such an immediate and wonderful release. though is not just about external fact. Use the soothing blanket of hypnosis which makes it possible for you to observe the triggering event without having to re-experience the pain and hurt again to transform your life. take control of your thoughts and change your life.Knowledge. i. Use the tools you’ve been given in this book and watch the changes take place. it also ends up restricting your environment and all areas of your life. observe how you feel. So wonderful. what do you see. So we then end up with having to work and fix two problems. If we continue to use larger and larger quantities and more and more frequently. This is true knowledge and this is something you can control. but also the happy feeling gets to be almost impossible to recapture.net 31 . what ultimately happens is that the emotions associated with whatever are trying to hide from are replaced with drug emotions. DRUGS TO ESCAPE I had some thoughts that I wanted to share with you on using drugs and/or alcohol to escape from thinking or feeling things that are just too painful. though just an illusion. © Copyright 2003.. in fact. what do you think about. You must at some time or another confront and deal with whatever you were hiding from in the first place. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. fear. I keep going back to this one phrase. Timeline therapy is especially effective in this area as are releasing techniques. that we keep going back to it. you can write her at idakendall2@yahoo. remember our external world is a mirror of what is going on inside. If you don’t like it. and since our environment mirrors our subconscious/unconscious. This is. what does your world look like. Look at yourself. You have the power and you have the ability to do so and this works for so many areas of your life and your world. This is one form of hypnosis that is best done with a hypnotherapist and not by yourself. When we try to escape from or not think about something that is too hard and painful to handle but it is something that we know we ultimately must handle. anxiety and paranoia about non existent things. we need to develop knowledge about ourselves. we then actually cause a dependency that can have nothing to do with the original issue. What eventually and always happens is that the wonderful release/fun aspects we first felt start to wear off very quickly and more and more is needed. It is also this point which restricts out goals and the most common underlying reason for drug and alcohol abuse. but it really is crucial to work with a hypnotherapist first. If any of you would like to contact Ida directly to find out more about her workshop.com.
but an actual neurologic path that runs through the body. depression. proponents of EFT claim that it relieves many psychological and physical conditions. The steps or progress of the imbalance is as follows: • • • • A negative experience occurs Negative emotions are felt in response to this negative experience This leads to inappropriate programming inside the body Then the body’s energy system gets disrupted due to these negative emotions. Not a hypothetical path. There are even more extreme claims that have been made stating “you can also use it for everything from the common cold to cancer”. ENERGY. any negative experience. EFT (EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE) Anxiety. when experienced for any length of time can become a contributing factor in the interruption of the body’s energy system. including depression. general stress. a negative experience itself.E EFT (EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE). The theory behind EFT that the disturbance in the body’s energy is a result of negative emotion is based on an ancient theory of acupuncture. It is important to understand that as with any “alternative medicine” you are the only one who can determine what works best for you. EFT was created by Gary Craig in the mid 1990s and was meant to be a simplification and improvement of Roger Callahan’s Thought Field Therapy (TFT) techniques.net 32 . Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is a psychotherapeutic alternative medicine technique and tool that works on this interruption of the body’s energy. anxiety. EFT treats that path by using a series of taps on meridian pressure points throughout the body. posttraumatic stress disorder. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. EFT assumes the premise that there is a path between the negative experience and the specific emotion that is associated with that experience. EMOTIONS. has no value of its own. © Copyright 2003. resentment and any other negative emotion that you can think of. As I’ve written before. anger. While EFT certainly has it share of critics. This is done while thinking of the negative emotion thus altering the body’s energy field and restoring it to balance. fear. It is our perception of the experience that determines the value we assign to it and that is why a negative experience (even the same experience) is different for each person who is experiencing it. addictions and phobias.
In addition. What is important is that you focus on the specific issue or negative emotion that you want corrected. this can include anything from anger and stress to the grief of losing a loved one. understanding the negative experience is not enough. Even though the exercise I give you as do all exercises I’ve seen list the tapping in a specific order and sequence.It is the contention of EFT that in order to remove the negative response. the brand new blank spaces can be immediately replaced with positive suggestions. deprivation. EFT has been the subject of several studies and I am listing three of them here for those who wish to investigate it further. As stated earlier. Understanding the underlying experience by itself cannot correct the energy imbalance and that both the imbalance and emotions must be worked on simultaneously. With or without hypnosis. This study divided the students into four groups and different tapping protocols were used. If you choose to use EFT with hypnosis. do not use self-hypnosis. The third study was published in Counseling and Clinical Psychology in 2005. Remember. Time or duration of the problem seems to be of little consequence to the effectiveness of the treatment. The uses EFT can be put to range from success and abundance. the subconscious is not happy with a void and will seek to fill any space you have cleared as quickly as possible. The first study was published in the Journal of Clinical Psychology in 2003 and was funded by the Association for Comprehensive Energy Psychology and involved 35 patients with a phobia of small animals receiving a single treatment with EFT. With regard to addictions. war trauma or severe physical illness. to addiction. and more importantly.net 33 . the order and sequence of tapping points seems to be unimportant. EFT is an easy technique to learn and safe for anybody to use and it can be done either in or out of hypnosis. Find a hypnotherapist who is familiar with the technique who can work with you. emptiness and anxiety. © Copyright 2003. The most obvious and common use of EFT is to treat emotional issues and physical pain. The advantage to doing the exercise while under hypnosis is that suggestibility is increased making the prescribed statements even more powerful. the root causes such as feelings of loneliness. EFT can help with both the cravings. since EFT releases a lot of negative emotion. In this study a psychological test called the SA-45 was used to test the levels of psychological distress on 102 participants of an experiential EFT workshop and to examine the long-term effects. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. weight loss to pain and illness. The second study was published in The Scientific Review of Mental Health Practice in 2003 and was conducted by Waite and Holder on 119 University students who reported specific fears or phobias. EFT is a powerful and effective tool to have in your arsenal. All of these issues can be connected to past conditioning and negative emotions associated with that past conditioning.
and hypnosis can help counteract the effect of chronic stress.000 brain scans demonstrated that when one does not deal with a painful emotion but instead represses or buries that emotion. By forgiving. you are tapping into your own subconscious and its power to heal. But what you are doing is letting go of your own suffering. Studies of HIV-positive men conducted at UCLA have confirmed that optimism is associated with a strong immune-cell function. But what happens when one does not succeed in dealing with negative and toxic emotions? What happens is that they will negatively affect the body in one way or another. but our physical health as well. which seems to be triggered by an unconscious or buried emotion of fear and perhaps even more © Copyright 2003. The latter group had higher baseline levels of cortisol (a hormone associated with impaired immune function) which level shot up even further when they were asked to think about their relationships. a German physician conducted with the help of 20. Likewise. studies at Harvard suggest that the relaxation response which can be achieved through yoga. Another example can be seen with emphysema or lung cancer. immune suppression and possible impaired neurological function and memory.EMOTIONS Emotions and Illness Research has repeatedly demonstrated that our emotions directly affect not only emotional health. While yoga and mediation are effective in achieving a relaxed state. Research has linked chronic anger to a variety of diseases with a weakened immune system including coronary disease and cancer. For example. fear and guilt has very specific physiologic consequences. cataracts frequently appear where a person does not want to see something painful in his or her life. the brain reacts by triggering a very specific illness in the body associated with that said buried emotion. It can even be linked to suicide. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. One such study by Dr. hurt and unforgiveness. resentment. This has been proven repeatedly with study after study. The body produces more nitric oxide when deeply relaxed and this molecule acts as an antidote to cortisole and other potentially toxic stress hormones. you aren’t excusing the other person or reconciling with them or even condoning their behavior. Holding onto negative emotions such as anger. accidents and increased workplace injuries. releasing and letting go of the emotions associated with anger. hurt. even more importantly. hostility. Some of these are increased blood pressure and hormonal changes that are directly linked to cardiovascular disease.net 34 . meditation. hypnosis allows the body and mind to relax on an even deeper level increasing all the benefits received with relaxation. One study examined 20 individuals in happy relationships matched with 20 in troubled relationships. Ryke Geerd Hamer.
but emotional suppression or its counterpart holding onto negative emotions is a vital part of the growth of not only cancer cells but other diseases. The scientists from the University of Birmingham add that when the chemical is produced by the body there is another benefit. keep this in mind: use it and use it frequently. taking care of your physical body becomes even more crucial. Try to eat organically grown (if at all possible) fruits and vegetables. etc). your physical health is at risk as well if you do not. suggestions and exercises to help you release and purge negative emotions. that we are out of balance. such as genetics. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. doesn’t it? It may seem contradictory. Those people with the most energy are also those people © Copyright 2003. but it is not. Releasing and purging toxic emotions is one way to help reduce stress and open up space for healing to occur. etc. it’s not just your emotional well being that is at stake.specifically. diet. fish and other sources of low fat protein such as legumes and tofu and take control of your thoughts. Whatever your preference is for relaxation and whatever method works best for you. emphasizing as many raw foods as possible. In most cases of cancer. seems somewhat contradictory. The immune system cannot function when under tremendous emotional stress and the body must have a strong immune system in order to fight disease and illness including cancer.net 35 . Of course there are many factors involved in cancer as in all disease. ENERGY Relaxation and energy. Scientists say they have found that one of the body’s “good mood chemicals” forces some cancer cells to actually commit suicide. emotional suppression has become unconscious and severe. Why would unhealed emotional injuries lead to cancer? The body speaks its own truth. In addition to nurturing your mind. Take control of your own thoughts and actions and guide them in a positive direction. whole grains. white flour. pesticide and/or herbicide residues as to be almost toxic by themselves). stay vigilant and pay attention to your thoughts. something out of alignment emotionally or physically. They say that when serotonin is placed in a test tube alongside tumor cells of Burkitt’s lymphoma the cancer literally kills itself. We already know that under great stress we get sick more often and illness is the body’s way of trying to tell us that we are doing something wrong. Avoid refined carbohydrates (sugar. pathogens. Throughout this book you will find theories. vaccines. and feed your body and mind what it needs to heal. synthetic food additives and large quantities of animal products (which in our modern world contain so many steroid growth promoters. it prevents depression. exposure to toxic substances. Don’t expect or look outside yourself for something or someone to make you happy. fear of death or the feeling that you are in a situation where you cannot breath.
or an inability to let go and just relax.who have the ability to relax more fully. your mind and body relax more and more deeply. The relaxation techniques utilized in hypnosis such as deep breathing. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. if you want more energy you need to find a way that helps you do just that. Hypnosis can help you. When you combine two modalities such as hypnosis and Emotional Freedom Technique. whether you are tired from a late night or have been experiencing exhaustion from overwork. but balance will return. you can actually open blocked pathways and reverse the effects of that blocked energy. So. visualization and positive suggestions are uniquely effective in creating a feeling of peacefulness and euphoria similar to what is experienced while meditating but on an even deeper level. Not only will you will feel energized and revitalized again. imagery. While listening to your hypnotherapist. stress.net 36 . opening channels into your subconscious allowing you to more easily access that deep relaxation that we all need to heal while at the same time allowing you to see the unlimited possibilities available in your life. © Copyright 2003.
soy. THROUGH RELEASING FORGIVENESS. FREEDOM FABULOUS How to Feel and Look Fabulous One Step at a Time By Irina Wardas 1. beans and vegetables sweep toxins from your body and slow the speed at which your body absorbs sugars from food. which as we know reduce inflammation. Fruits and vegetables and spices. nuts. How much water do we need? It depends on your bio-individuality. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Their phytonutrients . whole grains.net 37 . like heavily processed foods as well as corn. To get started in the habit of chewing correctly. • Chew every mouthful of food at least 30 times each. walnuts and ground flaxseed while limiting your intake of pro-inflammatory omega6-rich foods. turmeric. To eat healthy means not only to eat small portions but also to eat better quality food. Drink more water. safflower and vegetable oils. depending on the climate in which you live and your level of physical exercise. try counting the chews in each bite. Chew properly. Healthy fats. FEAR. © Copyright 2003. aiming for 30 to 50 times. curcumin in turmeric help to turn on your metabolism at the cellular level and regulate hormones that help control appetite. • Chewing breaks down food and makes it easier on the stomach and small intestine to digest. Use fruits and vegetables as snacks and use spices-cinnamon. Monounsaturated oils such as olive oil has anti-inflammatory properties. 2. It helps if you put your fork down between bites. Eat the right foods.F FABULOUS. But simply breathing causes the loss of a significant quantity of water each and every day.carotenoids in carrots. • Saliva assists in the digestion of carbohydrates. Fiber. These foods also contain high level of antioxidants. Try to eat more organic fruit and vegetables or at least from local farmers markets. Water should be purified and not from the plastic bottles or containers. Omega-3 fatty acids improve the metabolic function of every cell in your body. garlic liberally. primary by reducing the inflammation. The indigestible parts of fruits. FOCUS. Increase your intake of fish. until the food becomes liquid.
But sometimes we need to change our dietary © Copyright 2003. our brains and our thoughts and feelings. but it is caused by spleen imbalances. lowers inflammation and improves the rate at which insulin can move blood sugar in your cells-so there is more available as fuel and less sugar circulating in the blood to be turned into fat. But breathing is also effective. our skin.net 38 . It relaxes and detoxifies your body.not crash dietingwill also help you prevent your blood stream from becoming a toxic dump. Breathe. our hair. water and food circulate in the blood and wind up in body fat. 4. and metals such as mercury and lead from air. You have to be conscious of your breath for a few minutes every day. Any form of exercise helps. Your body excretes toxins and waste in perspiration. take deep breaths.) If under pressure at meals. Pesticides. which creates less gas. Learning to cook high quality food for yourselves and those you love can change everything. (Another toxin accumulator-rapid weight loss. but so will saunas and hot baths. The food we take into our mouth goes into our stomach where it gets digested and eventually assimilated into the bloodstream. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. our organs. 3. Our blood is what creates our cells. we can handle the basic every day exposure to toxins. If the body is working well with good immune and eliminative system. In the blood these toxins sabotage the body’s main metabolic regulator-the thyroid gland. Detox is a relative term. Taking the time to chew will help you to enjoy the whole spectrum of tastes and aromas that make up the meal. Detox. When you burn fat the toxins from the fat cells enter the blood). 5. Losing weight gradually . our tissues. Sweat – cleans up your system. The solution: Sweat. (Gas is experienced in the stomach and intestine.• Saliva also makes the food more alkaline. Just a few seconds of deep breathing can alter your brain’s chemical balance enough to create a great sense of peace. Eat homemade food. because anything that supports elimination can be said to help us detoxify. chemicals from manufacturing. Mind/body practices like yoga and tai chi can help reduce stress. Regular exercise should make you sweat. As a matter of fact. and let the simple act of chewing relax you. chew. We do need to cleanse our bodies not to become a toxic dump. and regular sustained movement support your thyroid. Homemade cooking has always been the key to de-stress yourself from junk and processed foods and to reduce your stress overload in general. 6. our body cleanses itself by an absolutely natural process. Exercise/Sweat Resistance training builds muscle.
diary products. etc. Studies have suggested that humor can lower blood pressure and boost levels of natural feel-good chemicals known as endorphins. While lying in bed think about something very pleasant. (Try an uplifting mask made of kiwi and honey: mash one kiwi and add 1/2 tsp of honey. improving your healthy well-being. and even promotes wellness as well as welcomes sleep. boost mood. nuts and legumes) can help most of us detoxify somewhat and bring us into balance in general. Yoga poses reduce stress levels. you sure can laugh at one. releases ‘happy’ chemicals. I call it facial meditation. grains. hydrogenated fats. 8. relaxes your body. focused. fats.(healthier food choices) habits to reduce intake of toxins and improve elimination which can be also a great weight loss technique. Healthy sex life enhances your relationship. © Copyright 2003. Shifting from the most congesting foods (sweets. fried foods. mix and put on your face for 15 minutes . Tai chi -moving meditation .it is delicious. because you kill two birds with one stone: you not only nourish/cleanse rejuvenate your face but also have to lie down for at least ten minutes. Have a home-made facial. Take the laughter yoga class.net 39 . refined flours. Studies show that your level of the stress hormone cortisol stays low even while you’re doing basic beginner yoga. We have to learn how to prioritize our health. 10. Have sex. our jobs. Laugh. drugs) to the least (fruits and vegetables. Try Yoga/ Tai Chi Class. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. deliberate moves that awaken your chi and allows it to flow unblocked throughout your body. our relationships. 9. We have to sort them out and start a wonderful journey to wellness . Home-made facial is one of the best relaxation techniques. meats.consists of slow. 7. bread.journey that will help us to feel and look fabulous. and improve overall health. You may be amazed with the fact that simply drinking more water (filtered of course!) helps us eliminate more toxins. Even if you can’t tell a joke.
fear of failure. For more information about her Women’s Health and Wellness Programs and Retreats.com and works with women who have stress or weight management issues and are experiencing increased appetite. insomnia or lack of energy.net 40 . Fear makes us cautious and with caution we slow down and re-evaluate what we are planning to do. Sometimes we hold fear close and use it as a sort of security blanket. mood swings. FEAR: fear of change. sometimes just fear and you don’t even know what it is you fear. what we expect. There are literally hundreds of reasons they seek me out for help and hypnosis. Sometimes it is okay to have a bit of fear in your life for a while. you have to actually believe that you do deserve the happy. fear of success. Sometimes they just feel stuck and unable to move forward or they can’t focus or sleep at night. When you do this you will find that the most common underlying cause of a limiting theme or repeating negative behavior pattern is again.naturalcounselor. that one thing.Irina Wardas is a founder of NaturalCounselor. though. We’ve lived with it for so long that it has become normal. to sign up for her free Newsletter with Healthy Tips and Recipes or check on her eBooks “DeStress-101” and “Detox-101” visit her website: http://www. healthy and joyous life you want. Sometimes this is exactly what we need to do. it keeps us from making a big mistake. That one thing is FEAR. isn’t it time to let go and move beyond the fear? Isn’t it time for you to move into the happy. As we work together toward understanding and achieving their desired results. Do you really believe that you can create the financial life you want to live this year? Fall completely and deeply in love? Receive a big promotion or find your dream job? Any of those things in life that make you wake up with a smile on your face energized and ready to tackle each and every morning in anticipation of the wonderful and amazing things that are coming your way! Or have you put a lid on your dreams. or even worse. a short while. But when you find yourself repeating the same patterns that haven’t worked for you so far or you find that you are unable to make a decision or just afraid all the time and tired of it. they want to lose weight or quit smoking or get out of a bad relationship or maybe find a relationship or deal with a phobia. it becomes necessary to really look at the limiting themes and behavior patterns that have repeated themselves throughout your life. healthy and joyous life that you deserve? Before you can do that. blocked your hopes and allowed yourself to become resigned to © Copyright 2003. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. When you find yourself in a repeating negative behavior pattern of a limiting theme. one thing seems to come up most frequently.com FEAR Is Fear Holding You Back? People seek out my help for a variety of reasons.
career and health because you are afraid of failing. So here are some constructive ideas of how to overcome that overwhelmed feeling and move away from fear: 1. Because so many of us believe that having unfulfilled desires will cause us pain (fear of failure). Be honest. Something that is important to you right now. afraid of disappointment. we were told to leave those dreams behind. If you haven’t done so already. friends and lovers live this kind of life. As children we were free to play. concrete and attainable goals and you know what they are. There is no reason you can’t add a goal back to the list at some future time when it is right. We became experts at repressing our desires and burying our dreams. The reality of this world we live in is that desire is the life force of energy streaming through us. have a reasonably happy life. living only shadow lives of who they were and who they were meant to be. Your goals must be your very own. get out your list and read it again. afraid to believe and afraid to hope. we are better off not wanting or expecting too much and most definitely we’d better not take the time to play. We were told to grow up. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. we have chosen. We may be able to imagine things getting a little better here and there but. many of us consciously and subconsciously come to the conclusion that. and life just gets better and better.” This thinking can be directly related to a fear of success. Take another look at each goal and ask yourself if you really want to have this goal at this time. This is wrong. you will find that much of that general fear and anxiety you’ve been feeling will lessen considerably. we are afraid to dream. write down your goals and if you did write them down. © Copyright 2003. As a result of being told this over and over or watching our parents. to bury our desires to put a lid on them and hide them deep within our subconscious.settling for less: less in the current state of your finances. for the most part. People without strong desires slowly whither away.net 41 . But. pretend and let our imaginations soar. For many people this is an uncomfortable process. It is our desires that keep us alive and magnetic. 2. One of the most pivotal steps in improving and renewing your life from the inside out is the ability to open up your channels of desire and to clearly define what it is that you most want. instead. stop playing games and to keep our focus on the real world. When you have specific. We grew afraid of disappointment and embraced fear and limitation. Don’t keep a goal on the list because someone else thinks you need to do it. The more we allow the energy of desire to flow through us. or because you think it is the kind of goal you are supposed to have. the world of adults. and grow up. the more vibrant and alive we become. relationships. as we grew older. in order to be an adult. the more connected we feel. “Limit your expectations to things that are realistically possible and that way you won’t be disappointed.
making it easier to create a visual image in your mind. laughing. A message unit is every bit and © Copyright 2003. The subconscious mind gives all messages equal weight and doesn’t differentiate between fact or fiction. that voice in your head that won’t stop talking. Writing your affirmations out allows you to focus more clearly on what you have just said.3. a powerful tool. or those thoughts and images that keep flowing through you mind. he can achieve! It is the ability to gain clarity about what we want and who we are and then the ability to focus our thoughts and energy in that direction that makes the difference. talking about how to overcome a particular obstacle. if your goal is to run a marathon. They can keep you up at night and they can make it virtually impossible to focus. set the distance goals over time that will build your endurance to the level you need to achieve. perhaps even the happiest? What makes them different from the rest of us? Thoughts are living.net 42 . even though we would gladly give it if asked. Don’t be afraid to talk to or call a friend. Focus. Remember the Power of Affirmations. Use them. though. you’ve got nothing to lose but that fear you’ve been carrying around with you for too long and everything to gain. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. FOCUS Look around you. life coach or whomever and ask for support. That voice in your head and those thoughts and images that you can’t seem to stop are there as a result of too many message units. parent. Review the remaining list and set interim steps toward your goals that help you work up to them. so giving it more positive input in the form of verbal affirmations works to counteract any negative input we are receiving from others or from ourselves. You know. Sometimes you can’t focus because of all that noise in your head. 4. breathing things. Remember to Enlist Support: Many of us are reluctant to ask for help and support. 5. I have found that the most effective way to use affirmations is to both say them aloud and write them out. As an example. affirmations are a wonderful tool to help change beliefs and patterns that can get in the way of achieving your goals. Sometimes. Throughout this book you will find theories and exercises (Emotional Freedom Technique and Freedom Through Releasing to name two) that will help you release your fear. it’s hard to focus. Do you notice those people who are the most successful the least stressed and yes. doing something together. Support can come in many forms: encouragement. Whatever the mind of a man can conceive and believe in. When you say your affirmations out loud. Say affirmations daily! If you haven’t already discovered this. you are giving instructions to your subconscious mind. If you have not asked for support much in the past. crying and so on. push yourself to ask for help now.
recorded on brain and body cells. During the course of a day. They can also explain when we suffer from an otherwise unexplainable anxiety or fear. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. and continues to affect our lives to some degree. our subconscious is able to do this for us. This information is relayed through out consciousness and into our subconscious. and its effects may be positive. though. though. The good news is this is very easy to do with the aid of hypnosis. self-defeating behavior patterns and so on. sight. If these memories are negative or limiting in nature. smell and hearing. to release and clear out any unwanted and unneeded message units. success and fulfillment. When we go through periods of stress. By using the Lindwall Foundation’s Releasing Process. whether asleep or awake. then release the negative impact and emotional content by speaking aloud relevant. despite the fact that we may no longer recall a particular incident. health. it still exists in our subconscious. affirmative statements. FREEDOM THROUGH RELEASING TECHNIQUE Throughout our lives. that release. physical and emotional well-being. Listen to either of the downloaded sessions you’ve received and you will notice an immediate improvement. touch. The challenge is to develop the power of releasing and forgiveness. every single message unit so that we consciously do not. Luckily. This is when it becomes necessary to do some spring cleaning. you are bombarded with millions of message units. even the subconscious can become overloaded by too many message units causing us to lose clarity and our ability to focus.taste. You are not aware of most of them and this is a good thing because you could not consciously process all those message units and remain sane.piece of information that your conscious and subconscious must deals with. we are continually receiving information about the world around us through our outer senses -. Continue to listen several times and you will find that your ability to focus gets even better. By far the strongest poison to the human spirit is the inability to forgive oneself or another person. forgive and accept forgiveness. confront the situation as needed. interpersonal and relationship problems. we can allow a past disturbance to surface. Just the process of going into and out of hypnosis will allow your subconscious to release many of these unwanted message units. Inherent in forgiveness is the ability to release and to let go of old negative feelings including hurt. negative or neutral to our mental. Over time. This is commonly referred to as memory. resentment or anger. The subconscious processes everything. the subconscious impressions can manifest as physical ailments. It disables your emotional resources.net 43 . © Copyright 2003. psychological imbalances. They hamper and interfere with our attempts at happiness.
existing situation. The facilitator guides the Releaser through painful past situations and ultimately through the act of forgiveness. tears. we don’t wake up refreshed because we are still stuck with a set of unsatisfactory circumstances. The facilitator and the Releaser agree to be willing partners in the process. you radiate that truth outward and your entire life is changed. Once learned. The facilitator asks questions to guide the Releaser in focusing. or with the assistance of a trained Releasing facilitator. heals the psychic wounds and enables him or her to move on and make new choices in life. Even when we sleep long hours. They are encouraged to allow the pent-up emotions to vent in a constructive way. which frees the Releaser from old patterns. a facilitator and Releaser form a partnership through constant dialogue. giving the Releaser the suggestion that the body will become relaxed and that at the count of ‘0’. During the Releasing session. anger. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. the Lindwall Releasing process can be done alone.net 44 . 3. 6. either in a workshop setting or an individual basis. he or she will be totally relaxed and at the proper level of concentration for the process. fear and anxiety. The facilitator then counts backward from 20 to 0. By using a combination of the Lindwall Releasing Process and talking directly to the subconscious through hypnotherapy you are able to let go of programming from the past and fully reconnect into and develop your own essence and potential. Some situations are deceptively debilitating. This not only applies to a current. They are also © Copyright 2003. They subtly sap our strength and leave us without enthusiasm or energy. As negative/limiting experiences are surfaced from the subconscious. Here’s how a typical Lindwall Releasing session proceeds: 1. When you can take a truth and internalize it so that it becomes who you really are on a cellular level. 2. Free yourself of the old “stuff” floating around in your mind and heart and find the real you and in the process rid your mind and body of illness. The Releaser is given the suggestion that memories of the most important situation needing to be released and healed will be awakened at this time. laughter and perspiration. 5. such as: What do you feel? What age were you? What happened? How did you feel about that? Signs that the Releaser is experiencing the situation include sighs.Simply knowing something intellectually gives you very little power. 4. the facilitator has the Releaser speak directly to the persons involved in each incident. but a lingering memory from either this life or a prior existence. The Releaser lies down or sits in a comfortable position. expressing whatever the Releaser feels needs to be conveyed to them.
“I release (relevant emotions. as a Soul. After an understanding of the dynamics is revealed. 8. and your body and life are the printout. © Copyright 2003. The words ‘I release’ are similar to pressing the delete button on your home computer. have learned.). the Releaser is asked to state. The facilitator remains non judgmental and supportive throughout the session. and I ask for forgiveness and I forgive myself.” While the Lindwall’s Releasing Process.” 7.net 45 . disappointment. such as anger. encouraging the Releaser to allow the emotions to drain until they no longer feel disturbed. can be done alone. function as a computer operator. I recommend that you use a facilitator who is familiar with the Process the first time. At the count of 1 the facilitator snaps their fingers near the Releaser’s eyes to shift the focus from the subconscious to the conscious level of awareness. Upon completion of the process (usually about an hour). I have discovered with my clients that using the Lindwall Process and immediately following the process with a short hypnosis session is an amazing experience for them. As people from all backgrounds. This particular releasing process does not use hypnosis. the Lindwall Foundation’s Releasing Process is a powerful tool to help us stop or reduce the undesirable effects that old experiences have had on our overall quality of life. As the Isa and Yolanda Lindwall explain: “You. the facilitator gives the Releaser the suggestion that as a count is made from 3 to 1. and feeling great. including health care professionals and clergy. etc. It deletes unwanted programs and emotions thereby preventing them from interfering with the proper functioning of your brain and body cells which in turn allows your life to function more effectively. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. once learned. she will shift from looking deeply within to becoming wide awake and alert. the brain is your biological computer. sadness. however.asked to listen to the response from the other party realizing that we are all telepathically connected no matter where we are or how much time has elapsed since the situation occurred.
I’ve written it here and I talk to my clients about it as well. fun. We find ourselves drifting along. A really simple way to test this theory is this. After you’ve done this. it is hard to focus on anything because we aren’t even sure what it is that we want. If you are not happy or satisfied with you current state of being. This same principle works the same way for emotions. Not only in your own relationships. I don’t know about you. “I don’t know what I want. bit in the people around you and that end up being all you see in your world. You will feel the anger in all the people around you. You will feel as if your world is filled with anger. whether it is an emotion. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Sometimes. A state of being is not an emotion. the same thing happens when you are happy and think about being happy. When I am giving a workshop I take the participants through this example and the results are always amazing. it is a feeling and a condition of existence. an activity or a thing. A state of being is not a state of ‘having been’ or ‘will become.’ it is who you are right at this very moment. a diversion to keep life interesting. you can change it by setting yourself some goals. You choose what you want in your life. if you think about a color. When you set a goal you are making the choice to have something that you want in your life. You start to notice all the people who are smiling and those around start to smile more as well. it gets boring and there is no spark no stimulation. not really happy. it is then time to start getting specific about a few goals and the first step is to develop a SMART Goal: © Copyright 2003. The first step is to know the difference between a state of being and a goal. something that is crucial to goal setting. Without goals. perfect and complete (even if we don’t think so) right now because you are exactly what you need to be for your current state of being. If you think about anger.G GOALS SMART GOALS AND HOW TO CREATE THEM We’ve all heard a hundred times that what you focus on is what you get.net 46 . I just know it isn’t this!” It is times like this that it becomes crucial to set yourself some goals. thoughts and ideas. Each of us is already whole. but I’ve heard myself say in the past. though. your current life situation. Conversely. Start the process of focusing your mind by thinking of what you want in your life and focusing a bit on your future. meaningful and exciting. you notice that you start to see the color blue all the time. Think of it as a game. take the color blue for example. you start seeing anger everywhere in your world. not only does life get depressing.
keeps us feeling alive. Adjustments are a good thing. o I believe in manifesting what we want in our world as much as the next person. achievable in all areas of life Realistic. © Copyright 2003. it just means you make an adjustment. they will never be overwhelming. You just don’t need challenges that are overwhelming. SET GOALS but understand that obstacles will come up and you will deal with them because that is what we do. • • Stuff has to come up otherwise it all really is rather pointless. revising and adjusting as needed when these changes occur. not if you want to improve your life. and this bring me to the next and very important point • Your goal cannot be about harming another. sometime weekly. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. you aren’t taken by surprise and the adjustments are smaller and more easily handled. Just because you’ve encountered an obstacle doesn’t mean you give up. meaningful to you As if now (already accomplished). we do it every day of our lives in little ways and you simply need to use the same process with your goals. o It is the challenge that keeps us moving forward. With a SMART goal and these suggestions. ecological (earth friendly) Timed in the present and moving toward what you want rather than away from what you do not want. If there is no challenge to reaching a goal then why would you ever strive for anything. doesn’t mean I can have him. responsible. Don’t forget about free will.Smart Goals are: S M A R T • Specific.net 47 . I’ve written about it here and I work with my clients on it. Keep adjusting your course as you need to until you reach your goal. they show us that we are changing and since we weren’t happy where we were. change is the whole point. But you can’t manifest everything you want. simple Measurable. If you do this regularly. it would be a boring and scary world. He’s got free will just as we all do. • If we could manifest everything we wanted instantly. I might want Brad Pitt as my boy toy. o Check in regularly to monitor your process sometimes daily.
The universe is listening and will respond if your motives are pure. © Copyright 2003. So.net 48 . set those goals. your goals are clear and you believe that it will. by not setting goals and attempting to keep all your options open limits you even more than making a choice and choosing a goal because you have nothing to reach for and others are then able to impose their will onto you. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. dream those dreams and allow desire to flow through every aspect of your life.Remember.
A sort of spring cleaning for the mind. It is speculated that hypnosis alters the levels of certain chemicals found in the brain that directly affect the nervous system and hormone production.net 49 . © Copyright 2003. Studies using brain scans and other imaging technology are providing explanations as to how and why hypnosis works in helping the body heal itself. make breathing easier for people with respiratory illnesses. This is similar to what is experienced during meditation except that it feels as if it is on a deeper level. Ph. imagery. perceptions and behaviors and replacing them with the positive thoughts and suggestions that the client desires. turning some functions on and others off.D. Clients often say to me that they experience a feeling of peacefulness. HYPNOSIS HEALING Healing and Hypnosis. In a pilot study published in 1999. showed that hypnosis can help broken bones heal faster and. and help strengthen the immune system. As David Spiegel.” And this is how hypnosis achieves its power and strength. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. by using specific. “hypnosis focuses on the ability to do something for a specific purpose. director of the psychosocial treatment laboratory at Stanford University School of Medicine and coauthor of Trance & Treatment: Clinical Uses of Hypnosis (American Psychiatric Publishing) explains.. but science is proving that hypnosis can improve your health and facilitate your healing in amazing ways. Working from the inside out. speed up healing after surgery.H HEALING. This enables the client to more easily focus on past negative behaviors patterns and it is this precise ability to more easily focus that results in the ability to achieve the desired change. deep relaxation and euphoria during a session. The most astonishing evidence is coming from the research being conducted on healing. Hypnotherapy uses relaxation techniques such as deep controlled breathing. releasing negative thoughts. aid with gastrointestinal ailments. lower blood pressure. Why this is and how it happens is still something of a mystery. the Medical Connection More and more doctors now realize that hypnosis is powerful medicine. directed positive statements and suggestions while the client is in a deeply relaxed state. HEART FIRE (HRIDAYA YOGA). It appears that hypnosis affects how genes in cells express themselves. visualization and positive suggestions. there is “some overlap with meditation” however. in a follow-up experiment published in 2000. Harvard University psychologist Carol Ginandes. Ginandes and her research team discovered that women who had breast reduction surgery recovered far more quickly after undergoing hypnosis. relieve depression and so much more. It can help relieve pain.
April 2000 discovered that hypnosis relieved pain in 75 percent of the people studied. If hypnotherapy sounds like a gentle. in terms of levels of pain.compared with 10 percent for the nicotine-replacement therapy alone. During the operation. soothing kind of treatment. The International Journal of Clinical and Experimental Hypnosis. © Copyright 2003. the positive goals and changes that you want in your life.” Seven years ago David Spiegel and Elvira Lang took 241 patients slated for vascular or kidney surgery and divided them into three groups. which is particularly crucial when treating skin problems. empathic care provider and hypnosis. almost half stayed smoke-free 18 months after hypnotherapy . When Barabasz tested this approach on 300 heavy smokers who had previously quit and relapsed. patients lay with their heads behind an opaque soundproof barrier. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. particularly for clients who want to lose weight or quit smoking.net 50 . so surgeons couldn’t tell what specific care any individual patient was receiving. but rather stress those things that you want to move toward. Every 15 minutes.It is also this technique of focusing and strengthening willpower that is responsible for hypnotherapy’s high success rate. The suggestions.” Barabasz states and goes on to state further that “I’ll tell a patient to imagine that she’s swimming in warm water on a tropical island or feeling the warmth of the sun on her skin while she lies on a rock by the water. For the client who wishes to quit smoking. One group received standard care: another received standard care with an “empathic care provider”. It relieves the emotional tension that’s behind the problem. though. Arreed Barabasz. A University of Connecticut review of six weigh-loss studies found that 70 percent of study participants rated hypnotherapy better than cognitive (conscious) therapy alone. director of the laboratory of hypnosis research at Washington State University in Pullman and coauthor of Hypnotherapeutic Techniques (Brunner-Routledge) agrees. must not emphasize what you are trying to move away from or are against. visualizing their lungs clear and free of smoke. and the third received standard care. Research has shown that cancer patients who receive hypnotherapy prior to or during chemotherapy sessions experience less nausea and vomiting than those going through chemotherapy without the aid of hypnosis. The underlying key principle is its ability to create deep relaxation. referring to themselves as a non-smoker and using positive suggestions about their body. Mount Sinai researchers found that adding hypnosis to standard post-surgical care sped recovery almost 90% of the time. the patients were asked to rate their level of anxiety and pain. They were also hooked up to an IV and given as much pain medication as they wanted. anxiety and the need for painkillers. And in a 2002 look at 20 studies on hypnosis and surgical pain. “The skin is the most expressive organ in terms of emotional stimuli. that’s because it is.
Once again.” Using imaging technology. experienced less pain.” says Marc Schoen. “It’s not just a fantasy. it can also be used for any negative emotion such as © Copyright 2003. This makes some sense to psychologists who practice and study hypnosis.net 51 . While in the trance.” says Spiegel. all the directions you can go and finally realizing that your life is a journey not just a destination. “It’s not just telling people things because that’s what you think they want to hear. the brain’s manager and planner. neuroscientists have taken pictures of people’s brains during hypnosis. It is an amazingly effective form of visualization that involves burning away negative emotions whether they originate from within yourself or are directed at you by others. recovered faster and spent less time in the hospital than those with standard care. the hypnotized patients used less medication. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. which could account for heightened attention. a Los Angeles psychologist and assistant clinical professor at the UCLA School of Medicine who has used hypnosis for more than 20 years. Operations on the hypnotized patients averaged 17 minutes less than those of the other patients. psychologists say. “This is all happening beneath the level of consciousness. In effect. a person is usually concentrating on bringing to mind some vivid image. you actually see it. The drop in cortical arousal accompanies a decline in moment-to-moment alertness.The results of the study were published in The Lancet. HEART FIRE Hridaya Yoga Hridaya (heart fire) Yoga is a form of visualization rather than the usual physical movements one associates with yoga. The snapshots show a decrease of arousal in the cortex. A journey that you can now control. Spiegel and Lang found. If you think you are seeing color. so the suggestions are not something the person has to think about or remember. While it is particularly effective in removing anger. and an increase of activity in areas involved in focusing attention. Lang has since supported these findings with two additional studies. involving more than 330 patients. and felt far less anxiety than the other two groups. Hypnosis can help you to take back control of your health and your life and once you have taken back control. On average. then the real fun can start. the person is conscious enough to hear and understand suggestions without applying or putting up their usual blocks. Patients who weren’t hypnotized felt more pain over time regardless of how much medication they received. realizing all the possibilities available to you. And this list goes on and on. the hypnotized subjects used less medication. and your brain acts as though it’s seeing it.
The Heart Fire exercise can be found at the back of this book. we each have to deal with something. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. unpleasant. Sometimes. even when standing in front of another person without them even being aware of what you are doing. rude or just plain nasty people. When I say fuel. © Copyright 2003. Each incident throughout the day affects us. They already know what they need to in order to reach all their goals. you can increase the size of the flames and when you do that the negativity literally does burn away. Problems that we encounter every single day. Some little problem or some big problem. sometimes major life altering situations and problems. it gets smaller and smaller until it can no longer burn. As we each move through life. as that fire burns away the fuel it feeds on. It grows dim when we try to protect it from anger. this imagery of fuel focuses on the negativity and anger of others and your own. the truth is that you do not need to have a specific problem before turning to hypnosis. This spark is at the center of each person’s heart. And while they are correct to assume that hypnosis is effective in these instances. With a bit of practice. not at this time (these are images we feed our mind when appropriate). you can do this exercise while awake. It is another powerful tool you can add to your arsenal. By focusing your thoughts on your heart fire. Why Hypnosis? I have found that most people think they need to be in the middle of a crisis or a specific need such as losing weight or to quit smoking before seeking out hypnosis. hurt. I’m not talking about feeding your heart with love and pleasant images. If you can imagine building a wall around a fire. All life starts as a spark. This is what happens to your own Heart Fire when you attempt to block negative emotions from either yourself or those being aimed at you. It’s all right there inside their subconscious. resentment or any other negative emotion that might be directed towards us at various times during the course of a lifetime. The fire in the heart burns more brightly when fed fuel. unhealthy or even dangerous situations. We have to cope with irritating. a spark of creation and this spark never dies as long as the physical body survives. HYPNOSIS My goal is not tell clients what to think. Try it once and feel the results. hurt.net 52 . guilt or anything else that has been adversely affecting your life. resentment. Trying to protect your heart is backwards. fear. stress. I use hypnosis to accomplish this. My purpose is to help them remember. this spark can grow a little dim. though.jealously. tension and minor frustrations.
you will feel refreshed. The bottom line is that hypnosis can change your life. every message unit. you owe it to yourself to give yourself the gift of hypnosis. or whether it is with a CD or downloadable session. At teaching hospitals such as Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York and Harvard Medical School. some not so pleasant and some extremely destructive. Positive goals you want to move toward are much more powerful motivators than those goals or the negative behavior that you want to move away from. however.” Using hypnosis. As a result. The very root of all the negative things you think and say about yourself is in your unconscious mind. hypnotists work with surgical patients to help speed their recovery. you create a vivid. Try hypnosis. Imagery has long been used in hypnosis not only as a means of motivation but for pain relief and healing. euphoria and control of your life again. the more your self motivation techniques will work to keep you motivated. it allows you to also do some deep releasing work. He compares its effect to that of breaking a world record in sports: “It changes our sense of the possible. intensely desirable vision of what it is you want or what it will be like when you’ve achieved your goal. Sometimes it becomes necessary to “clean house”. hypnosis allows the body to tap into hidden reserves. You will be able to replace all of the negative thoughts with healthier. relaxed. You can most effectively get to this root by accessing that part of your mind with hypnosis.We are bombarded every second of our lives with hundreds of message units. clarity. Some pleasant. more positive thoughts. © Copyright 2003. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. If there is anything in your world.net 53 . hypnosis is now gaining a credibility in mainstream medicine. then moved to the realm of mystics and New Age healers. your life or your surrounds that you are dissatisfied with. According to Stephen Kosslyn. The more visual and real you make your goal. This technique of hypnosis has long been used for dieters wanting to lose weight with a high success rate and as well as for those who want to quit smoking. feel or react. not only will you feel better immediately. Hypnosis allows you to quickly and easily clean out unnecessary negative message units that have been stored up in your subconscious. but the results will amaze and delight you. a professor of psychology at Harvard. and much better about yourself. The subconscious must process and analyze every bit of information. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t affecting how we think. Sometimes it becomes necessary to do even more and really focus on releasing old images or beliefs we clung to our whole lives. Hypnosis can help you achieve your desires. anything at all about yourself. At one time hypnosis was mainly considered purely entertainment. Giving you a feeling of relaxation. Most of this is done automatically and without our conscious awareness. comfort. Hypnosis motivates the mind to focus on its goal. Whether it is a face-to-face or personal telephone session.
fixing a problem in one place.” Cheryl O’Neil. create passionate relationships.. build self-confidence. mend your ways. what we say to ourselves. depressed © Copyright 2003.I IMAGERY. because your brain [subconscious] reacts to whatever you imagine as if it were reality. fear or confidence. and change your life . What we experience as feelings. As stated in Woman’s World. and it operates on the same biochemical principles as any other organ. 2006. recognize that mental states and physical well-being are connected. boost your mood. Self-hypnosis as well can be a very powerful tool. This same article goes on to suggest various visualizations to help reduce your stress. once wrote. “Visualization is a powerful tool to change your thinking. Your ability to overcome obstacles. that internal dialog that we all have is considered a fact by our subconscious no matter how ridiculous. An unhealthy body will ultimately lead to an unhealthy mind. can often help the other. feel more loved. good or bad. heal your body. The brain is simply another organ in your body. More and more doctors as well as patients. www. September 26. silly or stupid it may be and this is why it is so crucial to take back control of your thoughts. What we think and what we visualize can actually trigger this interaction of chemicals and electrical activity which can encourage development of some neuro pathways while allowing others to atrophy. Imagery and visualization have long been used in hypnosis as a means of changing and improving your life.cheryloneil. “It might be the most important thing you will ever learn. you cannot have a healthy body or mind without the other also being healthy.net 54 . a very powerful tool to have in your arsenal and available to each and every one of you. etc. etc. Simply put.is determined by the thoughts you think. there is a very important restriction to remember when attempting selfhypnosis. Your subconscious mind can direct your thoughts to create pain or pleasure. Taking control of our thoughts and thinking becomes crucial to having the life you want to live. Never. and an illness of the mind can trigger or worsen diseases in the body. ever practice self-hypnosis when you are feeling down. failure or success.com Cheryl is talking about imagery. who I especially admire. are at a cellular level no more complicated than an interaction of chemicals and electrical activity. INTUITION IMAGERY Imagery and Visualization An instructor of mine from my hypnotherapy training days. Conversely.” What we think. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. However.
or negative. Is essence, what you will be attempting to do is putting yourself into a highly suggestible state when it will be virtually impossible to keep your thoughts positive. This would be the time to use a positive reinforcement recording, CD or downloadable session. However, without specifically counting yourself down into self-hypnosis, use of imagery and visualization any time can have positive effects for whatever you are seeking at that moment. Many of the exercises at the end of this book include visualization techniques that you’ll find helpful. So, yes imagery and visualization can change your life, can change how your feel, relieve pain, increase your self-confidence, boost your mood and a whole world of good things IF you can keep your own negative self-talk from jumping into the conversation! By using your imagination (imagery and visualization) and your subconscious you can build or rebuild your confidence by creating a powerful, detailed imprint of what it’s like to be confident. There are few traits more important than confidence. When you value yourself, you treat yourself well, and others will follow suit. It can make your whole life better. Studies have shown that by practicing short intervals of visualization, you are actually training your mind and preparing yourself so that you know what it looks like and what it feels like to have the confidence you need to reach your goals. Positive thinking, affirmations and suggestions not only help you learn how to improve your self confidence; they can dramatically improve the overall quality of your life. Your mind believes whatever you tell it, so stop talking trash to yourself about yourself. The very root of all the negative things you think and say about yourself is in your subconscious mind. You can get to the root of it all by accessing that part of your mind with hypnosis. You will be able to replace all of the negative thoughts with healthier, more positive thoughts and feeling much better about yourself in the process. I read something recently and I’m not even sure where, but I copied it down because it is important to remember this: “All too often we let our fears get the better of us. We waste precious days getting so caught up in our concerns that we can hardly think about anything else. Eventually, the clouds clear and we see how silly we have been. Our most valuable possession is not life: it is the ability to enjoy life. If that is taken away from us - or if we inadvertently cut ourselves off from it - we lose everything.” Use the power of your mind, your subconscious and your imagination by using imagery and visualization to create the life you want and the world you want to live in.
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Developing Intuition Developing intuition, psychic, energy vibes ,clear your mind, mediation By Dawn Abraham By developing intuition I gave myself a scary but exciting upper hand in life. I will take you on a journey here that opens up a world of possibilities you probably never knew existed. You will learn how you too can do the same! I gave myself a some time scary but awe-inspiring upper hand in life. When I first started to make the effort to develop my intuition I had no idea the wonderful and amazing surprises that were in store for me. I started to feel like I had an unfair advantage in life that other people didn’t have. Then I realized that other people have it too they just don’t know how to use it. Sit tight and get ready to walk into an existence where your intuition is your greatest ally. I am going to take you on a journey here that opens up a world of possibilities you probably never knew existed. Did you know we all have the ability to sense when something isn’t right, not just some time but all the time? We all have what is called gut instinct, when your gut is telling you something that is your intuition. We all have a built in system that if we pay attention to it tells us what decisions to make who really has our best interests at heart and if another person is being honest with us. I now use my intuition for everything I do in life. It is like having an angel on my shoulder that has my best interests at heart. Imagine that for a moment you have your own angel on your should that has your best interests at heart. Who wouldn’t want that? It is one of life’s gifts to us that we don’t all take advantage of. In developing intuition you first want to start with bringing your attention to how it feels in your body, where it is in your body. Some people feel it in there stomach others may feel it in their throat or head. Start paying attention to your body and what it is telling you when you meet someone or have to make an important decision in life. For instance, you meet someone for the first time, it is a business meeting you are introduced by a colleague. Within the first minute or so you have made a judgment about the person, the way they are dressed how they speak and carry themselves. This is the first impression, it is mainly visual. After the visual impression you have a feeling about the person. That feeling is your intuition. You may notice that as you are listening to them talk about themselves or their business your body has a reaction to the other persons energy vibration. At that time you will either like them or not. I am sure you can remember back to meeting
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someone and saying I don’t know why but I just don’t like that person. Or something doesn’t feel right to me about the situation, business deal or the person in general. Those feelings are your intuition, and when you look back you’ll notice that feeling was right wasn’t it? If this is new to you the next time you meet someone pay attention to your body and the feelings you have about the other person. You will realize for yourself what I am saying. The energy that is coming from that person does not lie and you have the natural ability to detect it. A person can tell you anything, but their true intentions will come through in the energy vibes they are giving off. That is why it is important to pay attention when you hear that little voice saying to you, “Something isn’t right here.” A lot of people will recognize that something isn’t quite right but then they will ignore those feelings. This is the second part of developing intuition paying attention to your gut feeling. How many times have you known something and not paid attention to it and then said, I should have listened to my gut feeling? Me too. I got so sick of saying that I decided to not only start paying attention but really tuning in to my intuitive abilities. You can do this by taking the time to remind yourself you are going to pay attention today to your natural instincts and everything that is going on around you. The more aware you are the more your will awaken your intuition. Remember your intuition is what you are feeling not what you are thinking. If you understand the difference between those two things you are 90% to developing intuition! The third part in developing intuition is practice. You want to practice and exercise your intuition just like any other muscle. I know there are some of us that have stronger intuitive abilities then others but I have found that everyone has the potential to enhance their intuition no matter where you are now. You can practice so you get to a point where you have significantly enhanced your life in every way. What are some the ways you can practice developing intuition? Start to think about a loved one or someone special to you. Take some time to really picture them in your mind. Do this for a few days in a row. Don’t be surprised if they call you or when you run into them and they say I have been thinking about you lately I was going to call you. Practice with things in your every day life, if your loose something you can use energy scanning by closing your eyes and let energy expand all around you, see it
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place four cards down in front of you move your hands over the cards slowly and see if you can feel which ones are black and which ones are red. Private & Group Coaching. You know that saying. When I’m not I know that I have too many other thoughts in my head to allow the intuitive part of myself to function at 100%. The more you do these types of things the better you will get at using and developing intuition.com © Copyright 2003. allowing you to have a system in place where you move through life easily and effortlessly. When I am waiting for an elevator I try to see which one will open first. Meditation also helps with developing intuition because it clears your mind and helps you to focus which in turn allows the intuitive part of your brain the clarity it needs to sense or see what is really going on in a given situation. John Holland a successful well known psychic suggests. Self Esteem. Reiki.” How true is that! When you start to put your energy toward developing intuition you will be amazed at how your psychic awareness starts to grow. partners with professionals and entrepreneurs to create balanced lives while earning more money.net 58 . 98% of the time I am right. Motivation. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. This is beneficial because at that point I can choose to tune into my body and my intuition and allow it in. “What we think about we bring about. Meditation. “Official Guide for Small Business Marketing at Selfgrowth. Go with your first impression you get from each card. You rise above thinking in mediation. Another way I practice is with elevators. use a deck of cards. I wish for you all the happiness and success the Universe has to offer! Dawn Abraham Certified Life/Business Coach. Abundance.qualifiedlifecoach. Free Life Changing Mp3’s and Teleclasses are offered go to: http://www. Law of Attraction. We all have this gift it’s about taking the time to perfect it and grow it. The fourth part is training your mind.fill your entire home then see if a image or feeling about where the lost item is comes to you. You may get a warm sensation for red and a cold sensation for black.com. See if you picture a particle room or area in your mind and then go there to look for your lost item.
You want to manipulate whatever and whoever you can so that you can feel in control again. It is an immediate knee jerk reaction. When you love your partner you want to see them thrive. projections. delusions. frequently and explicitly your needs and expectations with your partner. You feel violated. When we are unable to express our needs to those closest to us. It is important to recognize the difference between love and attachment. You want to stop what you are feeling. Attachment is not caring for your partner as much as it is caring for © Copyright 2003. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. With attachment you want to make your partner conform to a projected or preconceived idea of who you think they should be. What do you do when you’re jealous? You may try to find out if your lover has betrayed you with someone else.J JEALOUSLY Jealousy. Often. Love cannot survive between two lives lived in this suffocating environment and any eroticism or intimacy that the relationship may have had will be destroyed. It is what we would call unconditional or true love.net 59 . guilt and a lack of self-esteem. You are angry. To love someone is to love the uniqueness of who and what that person is. step back and get control of this initial reaction that most often accompanies jealousy. The first step is to clarify to yourself what you want and expect in a relationship and then to share this with your partner. That’s the truth of love. and grow. How you see a relationship affects it from the very beginning. you may both tend to conceal anything that you think might threaten that relationship. succeed. you might find you can use this situation to learn more about yourself and perhaps. You want revenge. envy. you may go into a rage. enjoy their life. no matter what that entails. in the process improve your relationship or future relationships. in control of yourself and your partner. what comes up as jealousy really is a lack of communication. Many couples find that over time they have smothered themselves in unexpressed needs and desires. Love and Relationships Jealousy and suspicion are usually the result of unfulfilled expectations. Attachment is an entirely different kind of beast. they lie in wait like a crouching tiger waiting until someone or some event exposes them. If both of you want to create a safe and secure relationship. If you can cool down. compromises and a lack of open and honest communication. Frequently what we call love really is nothing more than attachment. You want to see them become more of who they are. and if so. It is essential to communicate clearly.
you will often experience the pain of jealousy. you can use the situation that triggered the jealousy to clarify your needs and expectations. where does this belief come from? Is it based on a prior experience or do you feel that your partner is your possession? Are they something to be arranged and moved around like a piece of furniture. If your relationship is based on Attachment. In blaming others and attempting to control them and the relationship. Whatever control you think you might be able to exert over your partner. It does not. NewBeginnings email@example.com 60 . Is this the sort of control that is suitable and acceptable to you? If you take the time to look at your actions and discover that you do attempt to manipulate and control in this way you’ve learned something about yourself. you cannot. you may be able to reach an understanding of yourself and your partner. you are refusing to acknowledge that there are layers and the possibility exists there are misunderstandings. Whatever illusions you may have as to who is to blame or who is at fault. What do you believe? Do you believe that if you are in a relationship with someone that it must be exclusive and committed? If so. not within the relationship. you will find this is constructive and healing for the relationship rather than destructive not only to the relationship but to your own well being. Attempting to manipulate your lover is a poor solution. If you work at peeling off all the layers of misunderstanding and projection you give yourself the ability to reach the core of the problem. and with this knowledge and a true desire to communicate with your partner. layers and layers of misunderstanding which can be overwhelming and frightening. If you spend your time attempting to control and possess you can never really touch the inner uniqueness of that person. You know that subconsciously you have turned your lover into a possession. the mechanics of jealously or what needs to be done. This distinction needs to be understood before you can understand any relationship. Jealousy is like an onion. you cannot make a person love you. you are not in a loving relationship if you think that you must possess the other person. You may occasionally be able to exert control over your lover and in doing so think that this proves he or she loves you. Attempting to manipulate your partner is an external attempt find a solution. The first step is to examine your buried ideas and expectations of how one should act in a relationship. the possibility of selfunderstanding and in the process you may find freedom from the hurt and pain of suspicion and jealously. © Copyright 2003. If you move inward and look at yourself. The most common but also the most ineffective way to deal with jealousy is by trying to control your partner. If you can do this. the jealousy resides within you. Can one person actually posses another and should they? The fact is. You can give yourself the gift.yourself and your preconceived idea of what a relationship should be.
Perhaps what you are really feeling is anger. Another layer can be guilt. envy. This is projecting. It is my belief that in most situations guilt is a useless emotion and that is particularly true in this situation. By peeling away the layers of your jealously. but that he or she is actually doing something about them. this realization can help you understand and overcome jealousy more than any other. Envy is often mistaken for jealousy. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. This insight. guilt or anger. Sometimes we suspect that our partner is being unfaithful because we have been or we are thinking about being unfaithful. you could begin to believe that your partner is not only having these same thoughts. Look at the reality. Anger or even resentment that your partner is not who you thought they were or maybe its just that they are just having much more fun than you. Use it as an opportunity to understand yourself a bit more use it for self realization and the chanced to heal something within your. they are not who you expected or wanted © Copyright 2003.net 61 . it has nothing to do with what you’ve been told you should feel. These all grow out of expectation. really look and analyze them. and it has every to do with what you are actually and truly feeling. If you do not acknowledge these feelings to yourself and realize that these thoughts are normal to have. we will almost inevitably start thinking about what we might be missing and perhaps even feeling that we want to be with others. Sometimes we feel guilty because of the fact that we are jealous. We think that we should be able to rise above it. we find envy. you can reach self-awareness. Jealousy is jealousy and if you are experiencing it. Look at your beliefs. You are angry with your lover because he or she has violated your expectations. This is natural and normal. Envy is the frustrated longing for what someone else has. The primary emotions I have discussed at this point have been resentment. the truth behind what you are feeling. Becoming aware of what you are feeling and discovering the source behind it can give you the power to understand yourself better and to alleviate the pain. Projection. Going down to an even deeper layer. We can experience envy when we think that our partner is having more fun than we are. and guilt are nothing more than pointers to your own needs and awareness. get rid of the ones that aren’t working. there is nothing to feel guilty about. It is possible that you might think you are experiencing jealously when this isn’t the case at all. Another layer is projection. The truth is that for most of us. You do not own it. the moment we make a commitment to be sexually exclusive with someone.Every person has their own individual and unique sexuality. the ones that cause you pain and fill you with jealousy. It is their own. And what they choose to do about it is their own affair. You are not responsible for their sexuality and you cannot control it. It has nothing to do with what you’ve read in a novel or saw in a movie.
Open your heart and mind to it. You become vulnerable. You are so controlled yourself that you are unable to allow yourself to be overwhelmed by the ultimate experience of love and excitement Love should not be focused on only one object. Fear of loss.net 62 . look deep within yourself at these feelings. If you really love and if you can move away from your fear. then what you are experiencing is not love. and let that be who you are. When you attempt to possess another person. All sorts of self-doubt can surface. If you are experiencing jealously.them to be and no matter how hard your try to change or control them. We all carry within ourselves memories of early childhood fears and experiences. They come from our past. go deep into your own unique experience of what that love is. You do not need to experience jealously. You do not need to control another and you do not need to be afraid. If you love someone. we can understand that what we are experiencing now can actually come from fears we experienced in our childhood. fear of being alone. Once you release the anger. With attachment you are channeling all of your love in one limited direction. you can watch that love radiate out for all. what you are actually doing is blocking your ability to truly experience love. If you do this you can see that at the core of jealously there is fear. or perhaps from a prior bad relationship or series of bad relationships. Out of fear you are wasting the opportunity to have a relationship that can give you an experience of bliss. If you find yourself doing this. you become yourself possessed. Maybe there is something wrong with your body or you aren’t exciting enough. they are merely an illusion that you are torturing yourself with because of fear. If you try to possess or if you have a preconceived and inflexible belief about what a relationship should be. You can choose to move away from those feelings. It is as if you threw a pebble into a pond and you can see the ripples moving outward in larger and larger circles. You can be experiencing love itself deeper within its own fullness. © Copyright 2003. Hypnosis can help. frequently they are not real. When you love. By looking deep within. Surrender to it. With love you are experiencing something in one direction (love) that frees you in all directions simultaneously. our childhood. There is an even deeper fear that can come from our childhood. fear of not being worthy of love. Examining these possibilities is another way that jealousy can teach you more about yourself. let that guide you. the resentment and the hurt. You aren’t clever enough or you don’t have enough money. but attachment. You can start projecting your own fears and low self-esteem on to another persons actions. All of these layers tend to have more to do with illusion than with reality. what you will be able to experience is an overflowing of love for everything in your life. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Perhaps you fear abandonment. you can remove the blame that is probably part of the equation. The stomach-churning pain of jealousy and fear of abandonment can come from that vulnerability. they still don’t meet your expectations.
There is no judgment involved.K KARMA. karma extends through one’s present life and all past and future lives as well. maybe something for you to keep in mind as you travel through this life. Karma on the other hand does and therefore we can create our own destiny. Do you believe in karma? Even if you do not. that individuals choose their own destiny by choosing different paths throughout their life. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. The philosophical explanation of karma can differ between traditions. Might not be such a bad idea to think about that for a minute before you do something you know you shouldn’t. In religions that incorporate reincarnation. if you prefer. Karma refers to the total compilation of our actions and the reactions to those actions in this and previous lives. present and future and because of this.net 63 . but generally the concept is basically the same. Karma should not be mistaken for the concept of fate. The concept originated in ancient India and treated in Hindu. Sikh and Buddhist philosophies. or alternatively. Most people © Copyright 2003. karma is the concept of “action” or “deed” in Indian religions and understood as that which causes the entire cycle of cause and effect. Destiny may be envisioned as ordained by God or. Jain. KISMET Kismet is synonymous with destiny which is a predetermined course of events. The law of karma is affected by all of our deeds past. we are responsible for our own life and in addition we are responsible for all the pain and joy that we experience in our life as a result of the karmic benefits we’ve earned or not earned in this life or prior lifetimes. Just a thought. is there a small part of you that does think you earn karmic points by your actions? I think the bigger issue is free will and the ability to create your own destiny. Karma is the universal principle of cause and effect. all of which determine our future. Destiny can be seen either as a fixed sequence of events that is inevitable and unchangeable. The key to winning the karma game is intelligent action and dispassionate responses. action and reaction that governs and controls all life. by human will (the concept of Manifest Destiny). KISMET KARMA In its most basic form. Karma is not meant in its truest form as a punishment or retribution but simply a consequence of our actions. Fate makes no allowances for the power of free will.
saint or seer. fate and destiny are not the same. In the belief systems of many cultures.associate Destiny with fate.” Because this is a recurring philosophy in human history. but with destiny the person is participating in achieving the outcome. Fate implies no choice. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. prophet. If you are not satisfied with your life. Current thinking is that you can take control of your Destiny and you do this by participating in your own life.net 64 . Fate suggests a finality to events while Destiny implies an inevitability to events as they work themselves out. Participation is the key that we want to focus on here. one’s destiny can only be learned through a shaman. Destiny can be demonstrated in the solder’s belief that there is a “bullet that has your name on it” or in a much more positive thought of a romance that was “meant to be. and is an outcome determined by an outside force acting upon a person. Fate is currently used as a power or force that predetermines and orders the course of events that is inevitable. There are those who believe that one’s destiny may be ascertained by divination. turtle bones were thrown ages before the I Ching (a divination method) was codified. which is a huge component of the human psyche. As stated above. participate and change the direction you are heading. The idea that life could be like a lottery simply isn’t acceptable to most people. In the Shang dynasty in China. Step in. © Copyright 2003. but fate makes no allowance for free will. it would appear that humans are more comfortable with the idea that there must be a hidden purpose to our existence. stop standing on the sidelines letting others control your Destiny. although the words Destiny and Fate are frequently used interchangeably.
What ever it is.00 a year income.” It’s about where you put your focus. The concept of the law of attraction is. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. People let the chips fall where they may and then react to them. that can help you with exactly that. if you don’t know what you want to create then you won’t get it. That means you create every experience you have in your life good or bad. “Let the chips fall where they may”. “What you think about will happen in your life. The old saying. I wrote an article Life Purpose how to get one. The sooner you clear that up the quicker you can get on with creating your ideal life. If you were writing a novel you wouldn’t hope your audience figures out what is going to happen next you would tell them what is going to happen next by typing it on the page. I talk about this a lot with clients and in my law of attraction Master Mind Groups. If you want to be a famous singer write that down. For example. It’s easy enough to say that but try doing it when you are use to allowing your attention to go anywhere the action is. is a good analogy. if you want to open your own business where you are the boss you would write: Own and operate a small business from my house that generates $250. With the law of attraction it is essential that you first understand you are a creator.L LAW OF ATTRACTION. If this rings true for you then understanding that it takes energy and commitment to wrap your self around the idea that you actually have a say in where the chips are going to fall is imperative. LIFE. Putting it out into the Universe Start with writing down on paper what you want. It is important that you see it in writing and declare what it is.000. The Magic of Being a Creator In order to reap the benefits of the law of attraction you want to start with creating what you want to attract. © Copyright 2003.net 65 . LUCK LAW OF ATTRACTION The Law of Attraction… What They Forgot to Tell You! By Dawn Abraham The law of attraction is simple yet so many people are having a difficult time getting the results they want. LOVE. If you don’t know what you want that right there is a major stumbling block. start by writing it down. I am continually surprised how many people don’t know what they want.
Now that you have set this up. If someone really believes they don’t deserve something then when an opportunity is presented they often over look it. your job is to notice it and then do something about it. don’t panic. If people start showing up in life that seem to be doing what you want to do that is no mistake. If something comes up to lead you in the direction of your desire and it looks different than what you thought. now grab it. Now you want to look and see if you really believe it can happen. They have ideas on where I should go or who I should call. talk to those people. I promise you it will show up. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. The opposite of that is when someone is in tune with their desire then they see opportunities everywhere. Be Open to Receive in Many Different Ways When the law of attraction is set in motion it is important to ride the wave and not stop it. that is the beauty of the law of attraction it sometimes comes © Copyright 2003. It’s not enough alone to just write down or say or even visualize what you want. If you put something out there and it gets feedback and you let that go your stopping the law of attraction right there. It is your responsibility to investigate that lead.The next step in the law of attraction is allowing. pay attention to what happens next. It is in the believing that you allow the vibration of what you want to match the vibration of what you are asking for. How you will know if you are not allowing is when you have put your desire out in the universe and you get no response back. When someone says you need to see this movie or read that book or go to that seminar based on what you just said. Don’t worry that it doesn’t look exactly like you thought it would. Your probably aren’t allowing the responses in the way of people and opportunities. Now the key here is to follow up with this. The Importance of Allowing Once you know what you want and you have put it out there in the Universe. etc. That part is important but alone it will not create what you want in your life. There is something there to be learned or gained. pay attention. In this phase it is so important that you notice what it happening around you and who is happening around you. you then attracted it. You may have had a picture in your mind about what you want and how you were going to get it. You asked for what you wanted. At this point it is important to know that you have started something very powerful in putting out to the world what you want. That is the Universe guiding you to what you asked for. You have made it clear. I noticed for myself that when I want something and I let other people know they often know someone who has done that or who is looking for someone to work with on that type of project. allowing it to happen is vital.net 66 .
com.in a different package.GO! We’ve got your back! Wishing you all the success in the Universe! “As a being of power. and contain within yourself that transforming and regenerative agency by which you may make yourself what you will. If we don’t like the fact that life is like this. She told him something I want to share with all of you. You never. Be open to going about it in a different way then you When you can open your mind in this way you will find the doors swinging open in all directions instead of slamming closed behind you.qualifiedlifecoach. I specialize in working with professionals and entrepreneurs to create balanced lives while earning more money. whatever that may entail because that’s your life. The sooner we realize and accept that. a very wise woman. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Not only that. life is messy. As a Life Coach / Business Coach. tele-classes and resources are offered. who has no idea that she is. Qualified Life Coach “Official Guide and expert” for “Small Business Marketing” at Selfgrowth. but he was lamenting the wasted (and he felt) lost years.com LIFE These thoughts are from my friend Brisa. originally thought of. Things happen Things we cannot plan for and things we cannot control. None of us can compare our lives to others because we aren’t living that life.net 67 . Go to my web site for more information. A friend of Brisa’s said to her once that he was 42 and he felt that he had wasted so much of his life. the sooner we can learn to love ourselves and our lives.” James Allen Dawn Abraham /CTACC.” And I realized as she told me this. So live your life. that is the Universe telling you go…. We cannot make everything nice and neat and perfect. the alternative is death and that is not an acceptable alternative. We are living the life we were meant to live with all the joys and sorrows and lessons and fun. Individual Coaching. This is an exciting time when you start to get responses back. intelligence and love you hold the key to every situation. Group Coaching. you used them to learn about yourself. she said “You didn’t waste those years. He’d had a drinking problem for many years and was in AA and had not been drinking for at least 3-4 years. It is never wasted and it is never lost. maybe © Copyright 2003. www. you used several of them to fight drinking and to fight becoming an alcoholic.
those flowers or jewelry that maybe our significant other doesn’t really love us enough or maybe we just aren’t special enough. married or alone. Definition: sympathy: sympathy for the suffering of others. We experience love in a variety of ways including heartache. even with those extra pounds or those unfinished chores. The message really is that you need to be in love with you. v. sex. First. but yes. Each of us really is truly uniquely perfect exactly as we are. partnered. though that Valentine’s Day is a symbolic celebration of love and that each and every one of us is here. some which I like and others not so much. then compassion for all the messiness and the baggage that each of us carries around with us wherever we go. When in reality we all know that it is primarily the jewelers. Valentine’s Day should be and is for every person whether you are single. the definition of compassion is: “Wanting others to be free from suffering.just around the corner something is waiting for you and the unique experiences that you have had. or all the commitments that you may have been avoiding. [Obs. trust . maybe its all the hype that surrounds Valentine’s Day forcing us to think that if we don’t receive that special present. © Copyright 2003. Show yourself and others a bit of compassion. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. living this life to experience love. all kinds of love.” When we talk about compassion. romance. you can and you should and you will if you allow yourself to. I can see you all now rolling your eyes.net 68 . I know. compassion and faith. then. Definition: To pity.] Shak. candy makers and florists who benefit from this particular “event”. t. That doesn’t mean you can’t still grow and change. I was reminded recently. I’m not sure why exactly. [I don’t care much for this one] And the last one which I like the best. each of us must generate a genuine sense of selfacceptance and self-love first. healing. dating. you are perfect. com·pas·sion. A noun. never have. LOVE Compassion I don’t like Valentine’s Day. Compassion (Com-pas’sion). I have found several definitions for the word Compassion. often including a desire to help. understand that you are uniquely perfect just as you are.
someone around you. in spite of similarly messed-up exquisiteness. treat yourself with compassion and that compassion will flow outward to everyone and everything in your world. places or events that you attract for one reason for another. measurable phenomenon. wonderful and miraculous things out there that are waiting for you to come to you? It is your decision to make. someone you touch may be more willing to love themselves. then this love and compassion for yourself will shine through and with that shining. the one that analyzes all your mistakes and failures and puts them onto a list of things that you must do before you can believe that you are O. with all their faults. in the process. one that you can get behind.Another thing that is so important to remember. If you are willing to love your imperfect body or your absent-mindedness. If each of us can live our life knowing and demonstrating that we can love ourselves in spite of all our faults. as well. Luck is a real. something I refer back to again and again throughout this book. My only question to your would be this. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. those we live with. your stillin-development relationships to work or money or love and your tendency to be self-centered.net 69 . That’s a motivating cause worth fighting for. Instead of listening to that old record. work with or just come into contact with. where a loop of “everything’s just as it should be” repeats over and over again until it is ingrained in your subconscious.K. lazy or self-indulgent. heal others and yourself. then someone else. that negative voice in your head. People who think that they are lucky actually do experience better fortune and more luck in their lives than those people who believe they are unlucky. why not switch the channel to the 24-hour positive affirmative reinforcement channel. LUCK Don’t you just love synchronistic events or fortunate coincidences when they happen? Synchronicities are the people. “Are you ready to be lucky?” Are you ready to allow all the lucky. you can and you should refuse to listen to that brokenrecord monologue that runs in your head (we each have one you know). © Copyright 2003. Give yourself a break. just maybe those people whose lives we touch. can start to love themselves as well. and. nobody can make it for you. then maybe.
net 70 . the depression and the cause of that depression. strokes and high blood pressure all of which affect men at a much higher rate and an earlier age than women. “Depression may look like a single disease. During the past 50 years. M. In addition. because millions more will attempt to keep their pain hidden and suffer in silence. certainly not for a real man. This can make treatment especially difficult. men are still frequently told and still believe that they must be the strong ones. One person may find it difficult to experience pleasure while another may be preoccupied with death. The anti-depressant that works for one person may do nothing more than cause nausea in another. As Dr. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. And yet. and so do the ideal treatments. It wasn’t considered a manly illness to have. gambling addictions or alcoholism) that they are frequently misdiagnosed and mistaken and it is the symptom that is treated as the illness (i. depression has been viewed primarily as a female problem. “No matter how sophisticated the tools and treatments become. In the past. The truth is that many of the symptoms of depression can be so severe (such as drug. sex.e. February 26. Depression can manifest in many different forms. with all these statistics facing us. the result of fluctuating hormones and overly emotional natures.” Michael Craig Miller. (Harvard Medical School). and this is just the tip of the iceberg. Miller has stated in his Newsweek Special Issue article.M MALE DEPRESSION. six million American men were diagnosed with depression in 2007. MIND SUCCESS MALE DEPRESSION The Hidden Illness According to a Newsweek. the macho male figure and that depression is for the weak. Depression has been linked to heart disease and attacks. MIND-BODY CONNECTION.D. American men of all ages have killed themselves at a rate that is at least 4 times more common than women. but the underlying causes vary. 2007 article.. the addiction issue) rather than the true cause. not something macho like lung cancer (responsible for John Wayne’s death) or dying in battle. American psychologists have been slow to recognize how men’s emotions affect their behaviors and their health. I wonder what the estimate is for 2008 or 2009. Physician and patients alike search through and try various medications and treatments looking for help. good mental-health care is also about helping people cultivate a sense of well-being…” © Copyright 2003. or even make the depression worse.
The reality is that we must adapt to the demands of our environment. “Forgiveness… has to be cultivated. Sometimes. Ph. fear or anger that you are experiencing. There are side roads and trips that we might want or need to see. This is not easy. difficult and painful process. There are detours that we must take. you can look at these experiences under the soothing blanket of hypnosis and in this way you can begin much more quickly.” It is for this reason that he recommends getting help to accomplish this. With the aid of hypnotherapy. resentment. Trying to accomplish this by yourself. Working from the inside out. subconsciously we might withdraw into ourselves in our interpersonal relationships.If you can imagine or visualize your life as a journey and a road that you travel. Hallowell. Edward M. bitterness. “Repeat a positive statement often enough and it will become ingrained in your subconscious” says Adrian Calabrese. we sometimes find that we encounter “trigger points”. guilt and depression. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. or we might become oversensitive and react in a hurt manner without apparent reason. without help. The first step in this healing process is releasing and forgiving.D. but they are not protective nor are they a shield and they can cause you to experience anger. using only your conscious mind can be a slow. smooth and without bumps or potholes. hurt. freeing your spirit and taking back control of your life and cultivating a true sense of well-being. These “trigger points” are wounds that have not healed with time and we learn to carry these wounds around with us almost like a protective shield. October 18. there are mountains or lakes that we must or want to circumnavigate. Woman’s World. however. Using © Copyright 2003. by using the relaxation techniques utilized in hypnosis and the power of your subconscious. You feed your spirit and you increase your capacity for joy. 2005. it goes against a natural human tendency to seek revenge. a Harvard psychiatrist and author of “Dare to Forgive” states. the healing process. When you release the hurt.. releasing negative thoughts that have been harmful and freeing the spirit so that the healing process and take place may be the most important first step to regaining mental-health. Forgiveness is necessary to free your spirit. it is also important to recognize that you have been given an opportunity. we can become particularly hurtful to those we care about.net 71 . without wanting or meaning to. it is possible to increase the effectiveness of the releasing process. ability and capability of helping yourself and your mental-health by bringing these painful experiences (or trigger points) into the light where they can then be healed. Hypnosis with it relaxation and repetitive nature is uniquely able to help you work through this process of releasing and resolving old issues. you take back control of your own life. fear. love and happiness beyond measure. During the course of this journey and these detours. helping you regain strong mental-health. As Dr. When this occurs. When you recognize that this is occurring. then you can also visualize that the road from point A (birth) to point B (death) is not always straight. As I quote above.
They will negatively affect the body in one way or another. can lead to serious food addictions.net 72 . imagery and hypnosis can help counter the effect of chronic stress. Some of these are increased blood pressure and hormonal changes that are directly linked to cardiovascular disease. Of course there are many factors involved in cancer as in all disease. drug abuse and depression. Mind Body Connection “Smile and the world smiles with you. But what happens when one does not succeed in dealing with negative and toxic emotions. The scientists from the University of Birmingham add that when the chemical is produced by the body it prevents depression. And research at Harvard suggests that the relaxation response which can be achieved through yoga. chronic anger may trigger bad habits such as smoking and drinking. pathogens. Ryke Geerd Hamer. optimism is associated with stronger immune-cell function. immune suppression and possible impaired neurological function and memory. the brain will react by triggering a very specific illness in the body associated with that said buried emotion. fear and guilt has very specific physiologic consequences. Dr. hostility.” Are these just glib psycho babble phrases or the ramblings of someone not in touch with the real world? Recent research indicates absolutely not! Research shows that our emotions and thoughts directly affect not only our spiritual well-being or what we might call our mental health. This has been proven by Dr. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. They say that when serotonin is placed in a test tube alongside tumor cells of Burkitt’s lymphoma the cancer literally kills itself. The body produced more nitric oxide when deeply relaxed and this molecule acts as an antidote to cortisole and other potentially toxic stress hormones.” “Think happy thoughts and make your world better. including diet.any of the exercises at the end of this book that feel right to you will help as well as the downloadable sessions sent to you when you purchased your book. Researchers at UCLA have found that in studies of HIV-positive men. Scientists say they have found that one of the body’s “good mood chemicals” forces some cancer cells to actually commit suicide. © Copyright 2003. The immune system cannot function when under a lot of emotional stress and the body must have a strong immune system in order to fight cancer cells. resentment. It can even be linked to suicide and increased workplace injuries. eating disorders. In addition. but our physical body as well. With the help of 20. Research studies have tied chronic anger to various diseases linked with a weakened immune system including coronary disease and cancer. Holding onto anger. meditation. hurt. alcoholism. a German physician.000 brain scans. Hamer demonstrated that when one does not deal with a painful emotion and instead represses or buries that emotion.
D. MIND SUCCESS Success Mind: Developing the Inner Game By Mollie Marti. fish and other sources of low fat protein such as legumes and tofu and take control of your thoughts. Meditation works.net 73 . and feed your body and mind what it needs to heal. etc). Ph. Releasing and purging toxic emotions is one way to help reduce stress and open up space for healing to occur. Focus on love or fun or joy or any of the wonderful things that this life and this world can offer you and that is what you will bring more of into your life. white flour. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Whatever your preference is for relaxation and whatever method works best for you. more than just your emotional well being is at stake. pesticide and/or herbicide residues as to be almost toxic by themselves). emphasizing as many raw foods as possible. It is important to remember this and I have written it over and over throughout this book. Remember there is a mind/body connection and you are the best person to know just how that connection is working for you at any given moment. stay vigilant and pay attention not only to your body. But you can use this to your advantage by focusing on any positive emotion. It requires that you develop a success mind. but to your thoughts as well. use it and use it frequently. if you focus on anger. whole grains. Believe me. vaccines. etc. a way of being and a way of doing that drives you forward through the good times and the tough times. but emotional suppression or its counterpart holding onto anger. In addition to nurturing your mind. Avoid refined carbohydrates (sugar. Success is largely an inner game. thought or image. I’ve found that hypnosis works even faster by “talking” directly to your subconscious and bypassing the resistance that we are all capable of putting up. guide them in a positive direction. This is a way of thinking. but only if you take responsibility for your thoughts and your actions.exposure to toxic substances. hurt or resentment is a vital part of the growth of cancer cells and other diseases. I know that when you are feeling beaten down and depressed this seems like an impossible feat. Success is a process of continually learning new information. Try to eat organically grown (if at all possible) fruits and vegetables. and this applies to any negative emotion. yoga can help. what you focus on is what you will bring into your life. anger is what you will bring into your life. your physical health is at risk as well if you do not. synthetic food additives and large quantities of animal products (which in our modern world contain so many steroid growth promoters. taking care of your physical body becomes even more crucial. keeping track of what is working and what is not. I have been there and there is a way out. Take control of your own thoughts and actions. Studies conducted in China have shown that this type of therapy can actually reduce tumors while strengthening the immune system. and © Copyright 2003.
It is about constantly challenging yourself to newer and bigger challenges and rewarding yourself as you reach your goals along the way. Savor these while continuing to take your dreaming to a whole new level to cultivate dreams that not only change your life and the life of your family and friends. You will find that taking action on the inspiration that comes from dreaming will provide you with extraordinary life experiences. Take time to dream. possibility is in the dreaming. Use the fear generated by change to further propel yourself forward toward greater confidence and success. You cannot achieve great new things without changing who you are and what you do. © Copyright 2003. generate new ideas.making adjustments as you keep moving forward. Taking risks is one of the hardest things for people to do. Most fears are simply learned behaviors. the less we fear them. Take action. knowing that it truly does not matter what anyone else thinks of them. This is one of the laws of success. and failure. The success mind trains itself to ask. make adjustments along the way. and modify your goals and processes as your knowledge changes. but also change the world. The success mind continues to do and learn and grow and expand. and gradual exposure to the triggers of our fears. The success mind has a powerful ability to envision big dreams. You will have to change to be successful. Embrace all the possibilities as you think long term and thing big. and keep moving forward. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Develop a process to examine your fears. Only you have to live with your success or your failure. and create new realities. if you talk to any star athlete. You don’t need to start from a place of perfection (which rarely exists). The success mind understands that success goes beyond the mind to favor action. fear that we are not good enough. One of the greatest barriers to successful change is fear. see unlimited possibilities. Gather new information. We practice them over and over again until they become our automatic response. fear of failure. and work to eliminate the roots of these limitations. The success mind knows this secret: The more we do things. “So what?” Successful people take complete responsibility and ownership for their lives. conditioning. While success requires action. Research shows that we can overcome or manage nearly all fears through education. fear of what other people will think. exploring one more option or opportunity. It is about doing one more thing when everyone else has stopped. discover the underlying limiting beliefs. The success mind is geared toward taking chances and gives itself permission to fail. foster creativity.net 74 . or successful businessperson. fear of hard work. inventor. It focuses on leveraging experiences over time and continuously gaining more and more experiences. It is easier to stay put than risk adversity. Yet. they will tell you the same thing: They learned more from their failures than from anything else. you simply need to start. learn from your mistakes. hardship. Fear of change.
When you say yes. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. This precious collection of experiences is something that no one can take away from you and will continue to enrich your life for years to come. you can never flex back to a place of inaction and stagnation. challenge. Your mind will make the connections between your goals and your situations and present you with opportunities that can move you forward. The most successful people say yes to a wide variety of experiences and opportunities because the breadth of experience is what gives you a pool of knowledge from which to build powerful dreams and bulletproof action plans.net 75 . Remember. Question. and success. This will continue to make your life bigger and propel you forward to new heights. make it a resounding “yes!” Dive in. and grow. Successful people hold a passionate belief that they are doing something meaningful and worthwhile. You might not feel ready and wonder how you are going to do what is being asked of you. you will see that the “‘how” usually falls quickly into place.Believe in yourself and in your dreams. watch the library of your life experiences expand exponentially. the opportunity often evaporates and you may not get it back. The time to begin is now. determination and unwavering focus help them achieve what it is that they set out to do. Perhaps the simplest change you can make to most quickly put you on the path to developing a success mind is to develop a habit of saying “yes” to opportunities. your world and your success. Your thoughts. Not simply because you say yes. This habit quickly will expand your opportunities. It is never too late to develop your success mind. Develop a success mind by putting in place a solid structure that supports © Copyright 2003. adventure. think. form opinions. try on new perspectives. When you experience how saying yes enriches and expands your life. When you are presented with new and bigger opportunities. A big part of success is being present enough to recognize opportunity and to seize it by simply saying yes. You will find that by saying yes to opportunities in your life. you will create even more opportunities for growth. As you create a habit of responding with a yes. create. But once you say no to an opportunity. the idea of not continuing this practice becomes unimaginable. Once you’ve experienced a higher level of success in life. you can always say no later if it isn’t what you needed or if it isn’t getting you closer to your desired way of living. your feelings. Make a commitment here and now to develop your success mind today. Mental toughness. experience. but because you condition your mind to see the opportunities that are all around you. They hold on to their belief even after everyone else stops believing. you likely will feel fear. The confidence you hold in yourself and your mission will help you push through obstacles again and again. As you do this. You continue to grow. your actions. and your beliefs are the biggest predictors of your success.
J.molliemarti. Mollie Marti. performance coach. redirect the effort. Dream big and take consistent.. lawyer. Inc. and successful entrepreneur to help others design and live their best life. and smart action. mediator. and healthier lives. engage again and refuse to quit.net 76 . a life and business coaching organization that empowers people to design and live bigger. Then use your success mind to evaluate the results. She is an Adjunct Professor at the University of Iowa Department of Psychology and is widely published in academic journals of psychology and human behavior. Give yourself the room to experience and to fail. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. make corrections. © Copyright 2003. Ph.D. Develop a process for getting up one more time than you fail. better.D.success and rewards your effort.. is President of Best Life Design. happier.com or www.com for more information on how Mollie shares tools and lessons from her rich and varied experience as a psychologist. Do this and you will be on your way to greater success than you imagined possible. Visit her at www.bestlifedesign. Stop caring what other people think. She also is co-author of The 12 Factors of Business Success and Selling: Powerful New Strategies for Sales Success. directed.
and interpersonal influence. John Grinder. disagreement between several divergent groups within NLP which is reflected in different definitions. These are the types of claims that scientists and traditional therapists take exception to.N NEURO-LINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING (NLP) Neuro-Linguistic Programming Neuro-linguistic programming or NLP was developed by Richard Bandler.net 77 . however. NLP is a powerful tool to add to your arsenal and I would suggest that you research this interesting modality further. linguistics and computer science. this has been difficult because it is spread thinly across the different disciplines and the fields. Despite its rough start and despite it’s numerous critics (such as cognitive neuroscience researcher Michael C. © Copyright 2003. NLP has found little support within the psychological profession. sales. reframing and therapeutic metaphor have become standard practice in many therapeutic settings. A recent survey of mental health professionals rated NLP as having questionable validity as a psychotherapeutic technique. it is referred to in the context of “the power of the mind” and such claims as “you can achieve anything”. training and professional standards which can be confusing to the rest of us. NLP claims to draw from aspects of neurology. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. management training. Frequently when NLP is mentioned. Judith DeLozier and Stephen Gilligan and is a somewhat controversial interpersonal communication model and approach to psychotherapy initially co-created by Richard Bandler and linguist John Grinder in the 1970s. Robert Dilts. Corballis who said in 1999 that “NLP is a thoroughly fake title. and many of the techniques used such as anchoring. but in adapted uses outside of psychotherapy such as business communication. designed to give the impression of scientific respectability”). sports. for those who believe in alternative or non-traditional therapy (such as hypnotherapy). However. and although there have been some efforts within the NLP community to improve its perceived benefits with recent research. There is. Unfortunately. the fact remains that NLP is still with us and has a large following not only in the therapeutic field.
O OVERLOAD The Overloaded Life
Have you ever had this happen to you: You go into a room to get something and then you promptly forget what it was you wanted to get? Or, you read a book or go to see a movie and a month later you can’t remember any of the details including the basic plot? It is all too easy to blame age and yes, sometimes age is the reason. But only sometimes, and not as often as you might think. More often than not, the real culprit is the stress of modern life or, in other words, The Overloaded Life. What exactly does overloaded mean? Well, most simply, too many message units or pieces of information, bombarding us every minute of every day. As an example of how we are being overloaded, every day we are confronted with approximately 30,000 pieces of advertising on billboards and in magazines and newspapers, on radio, television, bus stops, our computers and even in our elevators now. That’s only advertising, think about everything else that bombards us, decisions to make, traffic, sights, sounds, tastes, smells, good things and bad things. What you may not be aware of is how every single one of these message units creates a mini stress response in your body attacking your subconscious. While your subconscious is fighting this attack of message units, you physically start to experience stress, anxiety, forgetfulness and no energy which all combine to help lower your self esteem and a diminish your sense of well being. The bad news is that current research appears to document the fact that overloading is a major factor in premature aging of our brain cells. The good news is you can do something about it. There are several things you can do. You can start to make conscious choices about what you do and do not want in your life. As Janet Luhrs, Founder, Simple Living stated in her June issue, “Simplicity is not about being frugal and denying yourself what you really, truly want and love. It’s about making smart decisions with your time and money.” Setting your Smart Goals is a great way to consciously make those choices about what to keep, what to remove and what direction you want to go in. But being overloaded is about much more than only those things we are consciously aware of. Most of the message units received by the subconscious are dropped immediately into the subconscious without being filtered through our conscious awareness. This is not a bad thing when your life is running smoothly and there is nothing to cause
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you undue stress. Your subconscious is an expert at processing millions of pieces of information and discarding anything you do not need to know. The problems start when we go through a particularly stressful situation. Sometimes, that stressful situation is around for a long time causing that stress response subconsciously and the physical symptoms referenced above. When we are put into this type of situation, we naturally slip into a light form of hypnosis as a way for the body to cope. Hypnosis is a natural state for the human body, it is what we experience as we start to fall asleep, it is the state we are in when we first wake up and it is the state the body naturally goes into when it needs to process too much information or heal. The problems arise when we are in a negative, stressful situation for extended periods of time because we go into this light form of hypnosis and we don’t come out, making us super suggestible while in a negative situation. You can see how much damage can be done when this type of circumstance arises. Unfortunately, in our modern world, circumstances such as these arise all too often for too many of us. Aside from the conscious choices you can make to simplify your life and take back control, you need to help your subconscious. Since it was this inadvertent hypnosis that got you into trouble, the simplest solution is to use hypnosis to get you out. The fastest and quickest way to bring yourself totally out of hypnosis is by being deliberately put into hypnosis and then counted out and to do this repeatedly. Each time you are counted out, you come out a bit more from this hypnosis you’ve been living in. Do it often enough and you will bring yourself totally out. If you feel that this is something you have been experiencing, use the sessions you were given when you purchased your book and use them several times for at least three to four days. The difference in how you feel will amaze and delight you.
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P PAIN, PERCEPTION, PHOBIAS, PROSPERITY PAIN
Pain Relief When we think about pain, there is a major difference between chronic and acute. Using hypnosis, acute pain is actually easier to work with because it is recent. Chronic pain has been there for a while and is almost like a bad habit. A bit harder to get rid of but it is possible to reduce the pain enough so that some relief is possible. As with any “exercise” and using imagery or visualization is an exercise, repetition makes it better and stronger. It gets easier each time you do your exercise and the imagery appears faster. Understanding the dynamics of pain makes it easier to control. Pain does not exist unless it is acknowledged by your conscious mind. You can cut yourself or bruise yourself and if you are busy doing something else or thinking of something else, you might not really feel it until you happen to notice it, at which point the message is then sent to your consciousness that it must hurt. This pain message to your consciousness can be “turned down” with the aid hypnosis and imagery. This is a bit harder to do entirely on your own, but can still be quite effective if you use the imagery work. Always remember this, you do not want to eliminate the pain entirely. Pain is there for a reason. It let’s you know something is wrong, helps to keep you from reinjuring yourself and reminds you to do something about it. There are ways that you can turn it down to tolerable levels. In certain instances such as a broken bone, leaving an awareness is absolutely necessary for safety and well being. By removing all pain you could seriously re-injure yourself. There are three levels to tone down pain: 1. First you must put the pain into a more temperate form. Talk or think about discomfort rather than pain. 2. Put your pain in the past tense always refer to it or think about it as if it in the past (i.e., when my knee was hurting). 3. Control your state of mind (relaxed, free from stress, feeling positive). This is more easily done with the aid of hypnosis but is also possible using the imagery exercise only. The Pain Imagery exercise included will help you to turn down the pain. With a bit of practice you can do it quickly and easily. I had a client who was taking a lot of
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have feelings of joy or hopelessness.net 81 . situation or thing that determines what emotion we attribute to it. I taught him the pain imagery exercise included here. Also. fire. After a very short period of time he was able to take 2-3 minutes while sitting at his desk whenever needed and turn down the pain as often as he needed to. focus (if you have a problem with Orange. red would probably not be the best color to use. and it was important that he not add even more medication to his already extensive list despite the fact that he had just recently injured his back. health healing. It works great! PERCEPTION Over the years I’ve come to observe how frequently people readily relinquish the control over their own future to someone else and usually to someone they don’t even respect or admire. He came to see me for several sessions and as part of our work. Whether it makes us happy or sad. Don’t be surprised if that color changes from time to time. You have the power to change your perception. You don’t have to be suffering from major pain to use this exercise. In those instances you might want to go with cooler colors such as green or blue cold. Use it for minor headaches. think we are making progress or stagnating. Specific colors can also be effective in releasing and shrinking pain and discomfort. passion physical well being (most often used for pain control) success. © Copyright 2003. The basic colors to use are: Red Orange Yellow Green Blue Purple Pink White life force. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. growth. it is a very “hot” color and if you feel any heat in connection with your pain. His job involved him sitting for long periods of time at a computer and he suffered from the back pain this caused. is determined by our own perception of the event rather than the actual event. remember that red not only represents life force. peace creativity and psychic awareness love and heart health purity and protection The important thing to remember is to use whatever color feels right to you at the time you are doing the exercise. activity. Reducing pain is one of the easiest exercises to do and is gratifying to work with because the results are immediate. Quantum theory has shown us that it is our perception of any incident. use Yellow) money. occurrence. it works for minor aches and pains even better and saves you having to take a pill.medications for reasons I don’t need to discuss here.
Blaming someone else for everything that you are not happy with can and will destroy anything meaningful and good in your life. getting your responses and monitoring how you feel each step of the way. don’t hesitate to seek help with a hypnotherapist. Sometimes. PHOBIAS If you have ever had a phobia. your therapist will talk you through facing your fear or phobia. The placement of blame is a little bit like a Trojan Horse. it seems as if maybe we are just too afraid to use this tool. You are then taken back to the phobia again.net 82 . Once you have faced your phobia. © Copyright 2003. Depending on the phobia. there will be no emotional response. but perhaps the most effect is something called Circle Therapy. This is not done in deep hypnosis and your therapist keeps you closely connected by asking you questions. I have had tremendous success with Circle Therapy in phone sessions with my clients. This is done repeatedly and each time you face your phobia. Sometimes this type of session needs to be done a second time for reinforcement. This is a condition that hypnosis can easily resolve. You understand the fear that clutches at your heart and can freeze you in your steps. control it and use it wisely. But the results tend to be permanent. this power. If you are suffering from a phobia. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. the power to shape and guide our present as well as our future. It may seem like a gift in the beginning. it can make your life almost unbearable. but it is not a gift at all. This is a technique that every hypnotherapist should be familiar with so you should have no problem finding someone to help you. and again ordered to back off and release it and let it go. Perhaps it is easier to place blame for the negativity in our lives onto someone else thereby abdicating any personal responsibility whatsoever. Take control. It can be done in person and over the phone. though. Relief is truly immediate. this is how it works. There are a variety of techniques that can be used. you know how debilitating it can be to your life. take responsibility for not only your actions but your thoughts. to take control and change the direction of our life by changing how we perceive the events in our life.This power and ability to control our perception may very well be the most powerful tool that each of us has at our disposal. the feelings of panic and anxiety lessen. By the time your therapist is done. Basically. you are ordered to let it go and release the image. Perception is a powerful thing. After you are put into a hypnotic state.
In order to accomplish this. blocked your hopes and allowed yourself to become resigned to settling for less. fun. You will also find several guest articles dealing with prosperity. The time for new beginnings can start right this moment and that makes it the perfect time to decide that prosperity and abundance should be at the core of your life. and not just money or things. Prosperity and abundance aren’t just about money and possessions. however. fulfillment and yes. maybe it’s time to get rid of it and start living a life filled with prosperity. One of the most pivotal steps in improving your life from the inside out is the ability to open your channels of desire and to clearly define what it is that you most want. Please read Rituals for Success and Mind Success. and not just a lack of money or things. Do you really believe that you can have a prosperous and abundant life or have you put a lid on your dreams.net 83 . Marti. you will enjoy them immensely.PROSPERITY Prosperity As A Way Of Life “Prosperity is a way of living and thinking. Sometimes we need to look at the limiting themes and behavior patterns that have repeated themselves in our life. For many people this is an uncomfortable process. even fear of success. Poverty is a way of living and thinking. money as well. But this process can be made much easier with the proper goals. Perhaps that was okay for you in the past. both written by Dr. thinking and dreaming. joyful and full life filled with love. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. fear of failure. prosperity includes a rich. Fear of change. You may have needed to carry around that fear for a while. Use the Smart Goals exercise to help you. abundance and success so I don’t think you need to read anything more from me on this particular subject. © Copyright 2003. happiness.” Eric Butterworth Any time is a great time to re-evaluate how you are living. it may be necessary to make some changes. Frequently they are a result of fear. But maybe now that baggage has gotten too heavy to carry around with you any longer. Mollie W.
If there is anything about which we have always felt sure. the Many Worlds Hypothesis and so much more that it makes my head spin. not the other way around. This basic fact is hard to grasp because it goes against all our prior experience and teachings. They exist within consciousness. EPR Paradox. Quantum Electrodynamics (QED). solid. © Copyright 2003. the observer and the observed are not separate but connected. Unified Field Theory. because what was a mechanical. taste. in about three or four paragraphs! So. touch. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. String Theory.Q QUANTUM MANIFESTING Quantum Manifesting In a Nutshell I was going to write a section on Quantum Physics and Manifesting. Time. it is that the world we experience is a real and tangible world.net 84 . However real and external these images may seem. Grand Unified Theory. Supersymmetry. external universe. utterly real. and tangible. Our perception and our reality from a quantum perspective states that all we see. But when we wake up we realize that everything in the dream was actually a creation of our own mind. Quantum theory has changed how we view the world. in addition. In the dream it all seems very real. the Copenhagen Interpretation. independent and apart from us. they are all phenomena within the mind. Superstring Theory. Science now propounds the theory that the simple act of observing something changes the result of any experiment. however. Loop Quantum Gravity. I realized there is simply no way to discuss Quantum Optics. standing as a physical world. around us. separate from us. touch it. M-Theory. Quantum Gravity. and hear it. and feel has been created from data received through our sensory organs. This quantum perspective goes on to state that the world of our experience is no more “out there” than are our own dreams. has now become a web of intelligence and internal observation. and matter are secondary and are only aspects of the image of reality manifesting in our own mind. Quantum theory tells us that this same process of reality-generation occurs when we are awake. We can see it. All we ever know of the world around us are the mental images that our mind constructs from that data. Schroedinger’s Cat. hear. you are getting a little something called Quantum Manifesting in a Nutshell. smell. instead. When we dream we create a reality in which events happen around us. space. It appears undeniably to be out there. and in this dream we perceive other people as individuals separate from us. as I started to research this a bit. Theory of Everything.
it seems to me if you really want to manifest a desired reality. and there’s only one real way to do that. your focus on what you want is the source of the creative process for turning your thoughts and desires into your reality. the best way to do that is to talk directly to your subconscious. huh? So. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Cool. what is the secret of Quantum Manifestation? The answer in a nutshell.So.net 85 . Your body will follow your mind’s commands and travel along the directed pathway until that desired reality is created. Hypnosis! © Copyright 2003. if this is the case and all quantum theories ultimately end up at proposition. Your intention creates a constant energy flowing toward the reality that you want to create.
NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. you are one of a very small minority and probably do not need to read this. cries or screams when upset. why we behave as we do and why we select the partners we do. E&P actually stands for Emotional and Physical and the theory of emotional and physical attraction and sexuality can be the beginning of a whole new road to self-realization and discovery for you. The divorce rate is steadily climbing and there has been no indication of that situation changing anytime soon. The E&P attraction principal provides us with a simple explanation of how relationships are formed. if you are not.R RELATIONSHIPS. It would be far more accurate to say intellectuals and emotionals because it is the emotional/intellectual who tends to analyze situations and possible relationships from all possible angles before becoming involved. In addition. how they can come apart. when I refer to E&P attraction or emotional and physical attraction. congratulations. The subject is relationship strategies or E&P attraction. possibly even throws things when angry. RITUALS FOR SUCCESS RELATIONSHIPS Relationship Strategies E&P (Emotional and Physical) Attraction Are you in a happy. the rest of the world seems to be slowly catching up. Unfortunately. The average length of a live-in relationship is 1-3 years and the average length of a dating relationship is 6-8 weeks.net 86 . it is the emotional who tends to keep emotions inside and the physical who tends to act out their emotions. First. RELEASING. It is no secret that the state of relationships in the United States today is disastrous. our behavior patterns. I am referring to a person’s sexuality and when I refer to sexuality. fulfilled relationship? The kind of a relationship that makes you feel complete? If you are. You are probably asking yourself right now just what is E&P Attraction. and it is the emotional who very quietly sits there and perhaps even insists that nothing is wrong. Currently the average length of a marriage is between 3-5 years. I am talking about just how we each relate to others. and it is the physical/emotional who seems to just jump right in. “emotionals” and “physicals” really are misnamed. However. © Copyright 2003. read on. It is the physical who yells. These two distinct types.
The physical feels acceptance when they are close to others and this is why their number one priority is their relationship. Let’s cover very briefly. longer hours at the office. As a hypnotherapist I take into account both the physical and emotional behavior patterns and how they relate to each other. they are in what is called the honeymoon stage. but it does make him start to think that maybe he was mistaken about her being a confident. When they first meet.Traditional relationship counselors consider only one behavior as an appropriate behavior for all of us. The problems arise a little later because of the innate differences in the way the two relate to each other. With the physical female. he feels he has accomplished what he set out to do and now it is time to get on with his real priority. then their friends and hobbies and finally career. is quite a bit different. Next would be their children. many emotionals have run away from relationship counseling and refuse to go back. outgoing. After all. For the physical. In relationships. The emotional feels acceptance through their accomplishments or achievements. Let’s take an example of a physical female and an emotional male. And that’s a good thing. the number one priority is the relationship they are currently in. what the priorities of each are. next would be their relationship and family and finally would be friendships. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. It’s rather like radar and allows us to find each other. opposites really do attract and most people don’t realize just how true this is. secure and © Copyright 2003. And boy do they do relate. So he starts spending more time at work. When his partner complains that they never see each other. Their first priority is their career. self-confident and sure of herself because her emotional counterpart during this stage is focusing on the relationship probably because at this stage he is viewing it as an accomplishment. I really do mean attraction. She on the other hand. as a result of him spending more and more time at work is beginning to feel a bit insecure. This tends to be the physical behavior pattern (especially for men) and as a result of this somewhat limited counseling technique. This appearance of neediness does not accomplish what she is hoping for. then hobbies. She is happy. She starts to doubt the relationship which then causes her to act a bit needy and perhaps get more demanding. normal and is that little something extra that causes the sparks to fly when you meet someone. he cannot understand why. To her partner it is his career. The emotional. his career. they see each other every night what more could she want and why. He is at this point confident that the relationship is working. This is natural. When I say E&P attraction.net 87 . on the other hand. acting much more physical than is his normal state and so she feels sure of herself and the relationship. But let’s look into the future several months. the relationship is of primary importance to her.
communication is key to any successful relationship. Releasing helps you to let go of attachments that no longer serve you.net 88 . By learning more about E&P attraction and sexuality we can modify attitudes and behaviors ultimately leading to greater enjoyment and longevity in our intimate relationships. What can be done about this. RELEASING Releasing allows you to remove emotional blocks from the past that may be holding you back. sadness. you can make intelligent decisions and act accordingly. Knowledge is power and this vicious cyclee can be broken so that both parties can regain that spark that little sparkle that made the relationship so special to begin with. This is done through imagery and suggestion.independent woman so he pulls back even more which then causes her to pursue more because the physical needs to understand why the relationship has changed and what is going on. This could be as a result of childhood abuse issues. long standing issues from their past and other forms of therapy or releasing have not been enough. to focus on what you want and what’s important to you so that you can then create the future that you dream of. Interestingly enough. understand what is important and enjoy the differences between you that make you so special together. to let go of decisions that have created limiting beliefs in your life. the reasons do not even need to be discussed in order for these two techniques to be effective. Remember. With communication you can understand each other. When we are healthy and balanced. to free your energy for a worthwhile purpose. releasing occurs naturally. though. it could be as a result of several traumatic events occuring in a short period of time. there are issues involved that require more intensive releasing techniques. fear and guilt. it could stem from post traumatic stress syndrome or any number of other reasons. Sometimes we get a bit overloaded with message units and then it may be necessary to “instruct” the subconscious to release. to get clear on your goals for the future. Plenty. The process is quick. without some help or understanding can continue to deteriorate until the relationship dies a slow and sometimes painful demise. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. I recommend to my clients one of the two following techniques when it becomes obvious that they have some serious. When you understand how the other thinks. Sometimes. pleasant and you feel great afterwards. © Copyright 2003. It occurs after the subconscious has processed information and can occur while we sleep or are awake. Release anger. But her pursuit appears to be emotional and needy and so he pulls away even more and they start on a vicious cycle that.
NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. RITUALS FOR SUCCESS Success Rituals: When “Same Old Same Old” Is a Good Thing By Mollie Marti. fears. anger.D. If your subconscious is ready. These factors can quickly decrease your mind’s ability to take in. They help ensure that you that you recoup energy during your day.net 89 . It’s not that you don’t want to give your full attention to the task in front of you. it just becomes too difficult when there is so much going on around you. process and recall information. Both techniques are effective. body and emotions. doubts. anxiety and self-questioning can quickly create a lot of static. hurt. That may been all you need at this time. both techniques make you feel about 10 pounds lighter and both techniques open up space for new. positive thoughts. fear and guilt and then burning them away from that initial trigger point all the way to the present. Or perhaps the distracting noise is coming from within your own head. Time-Line Therapy (discussed in detail later in Chapter T) is another technique for releasing and burning away negative emotions. They are designed to reduce unfamiliarity. physical. ideas and emotions allowing you to move forward and make changes in your life. you cannot release the negative emotions and move forward. Both of these techniques are also rather time consuming and can take anywhere from two to four hours or even longer to work through. unpredictability and lack of control. Forgiveness is not necessary when working with Time-Line Imagery which focuses instead on discovering the initial trigger point for each of four destructive emotions. Negative expectations. If you feel that you may need some releasing work. and emotional states. They also decrease your ability to focus on what’s important at the time. These are three of the biggest factors that erode or detract from your performance. it will respond to the imagery and suggestions included within your sessions and start the releasing process right away. Success rituals are recognized and disciplined patterns of behavior that engage your mind. The underlying thought being that if you cannot forgive yourself and well as those who have wronged you.The Lindwall Freedom Through Releasing Therapy was discussed earlier and is one effective technique for releasing and forgiving. Success rituals can help reduce the noise and keep you focused on the task at hand. Ph. This is essential when you are in a long meeting or are performing © Copyright 2003. use your downloadable sessions first. Using success rituals regulates your behavior and engages your optimal mental.
five of which are briefly introduced in this short chapter. You wake up and your first thought might be. Rest Cycle: Think about the amount of energy you pour out within a single day. “I expect to perform” or “I expect to do my best. make a choice to expect positive results. over the telephone. allowing you to relax and sleep more soundly. in and of © Copyright 2003. you are ready for it. Rather. boring day.several tasks at a continuous high level over a long period of time. “It’s too early” or “I so don’t want to go to work today. You give energy away to other people. consciously make a choice to expect good things to happen. If you are interested in a more comprehensive discussion of all of the components and how to use them to become more successful. Many rituals are quite simple. Other areas of performance are more demanding and require more complex success rituals. taking in a deep breathe. see chapters 11-12 of Selling: Powerful New Strategies for Sales Success. It’s going to be a gloomy. build in ways to recoup your energy. “It’s gray and cloudy. you will quickly notice an improvement in how you feel and how much you can accomplish. each and every day. physical and emotional energy on a variety of tasks. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Here are five ritualistic components that you can begin using today for greater success: Expectancy to Perform: As you begin preparing for your day or a specific task.net 90 . Or writing three things you are grateful for each night before you go to bed. from the minute you wake up in the morning until your head hits the pillow at night. reading a book. So many times we forget that we have the freedom to choose to perform at the best level available to us in each moment. You spend mental.” Don’t give away your power to other people or things. Setting a positive expectation at the beginning of a task provides a mental framework for your performance. preparing you to be present and sound positive when you answer it.” Write this expectation out and keep it in from of you. You can do this by incorporating rest cycles into your day.” Or perhaps you wait to look out the window and let the weather determine your mood. As you spend energy during the day. These types of performance routines consist of ten components. Are you sold yet on the importance of success rituals? The best performers in the world use them. As you add them to your day. For example. You rest before hand and when it’s time to engage and get something done. Think and say. exhaling and smiling every time the phone rings. and in countless other interactions. to your computer. Rest is any activity.
For example. Influence Management: Before any performance. Do what you need to do to refuel and recharge as you go throughout your day. after working at your computer for an hour. which is pleasurable and restorative. you need to clear your mind so you can focus on the task at hand. This quickly results in undermining your performance and reducing the contribution you make to others. Make a list of favorite activities that refuel and energize you. frustration. It involves identifying a specific negative emotion. it still will be there after you’ve discharged the negative emotion and cleared your head. and anxiety. and discarding the emotion. It’s important to remember that if there is a larger unresolved problem. you are less able to concentrate on your task. you might need to get a drink of water or a small snack to refuel or go for a brief walk. rhythmic breathing. This allows you to focus intently on the task at hand. you might close your eyes for a few minutes and focus on restoring your energy with deep. The ideal is for you to build in rest cycles that are appropriate to the stress you have experienced. It does not work to bust it all week long and try to rejuvenate over the weekend. These negative emotions take precious energy away from the situation in front of you.net 91 . Then build brief periods of these energizing activities into each day. How many times have you been trying to focus on an important task while your mind drifts away to something else? Often times it is an emotionally charged issue that pulls your mind away. Your performance level will have dropped so far by the weekend that you’re then just trying to regain lost ground. While the person next to you is not fully present because he’s still fuming over a conflict he had with someone else that morning. anger. Pitching tells your mind that you are taking control and allows you to immediately get back to the present moment. You are carrying emotions from an unresolved issue that continues to eat away at you. it might be sufficient to stand up and stretch for a couple of minutes before switching to your next activity. The idea is to grab the emotion and throw it out of your head. Pitching allows you to discharge negative emotions on demand. linking it with a unique physical action.itself. You are unique and what is restful to another person might not be to you. One key influence management tool I provide in my Selling book is called “pitching”. guilt. When you learn to discharge negative emotion on demand. If your morning is unusually hectic with unexpected or demanding telephone calls. nervousness. you have taken action to tell your mind that you are taking control. fatigue. You’ve © Copyright 2003. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. After a 90-minute presentation. it gives you an amazing competitive edge. When you carry negative emotions like fear. Make a conscious choice to continuously fill up your gas tank so you’ll have energy available to draw from when you need it.
as I walk in the door or up to the podium. Refocused!” Engagement Cue: It’s important for peak performance to fully prime your mind. I “turn on” my full engagement. What are those things that surround you and tend to pull you away from your task? Anything that pulls you away from what you’re doing at the moment. or a clock on the wall. For example. body and emotions that it is time to perform. back to my task. you will want to make your cue portable so you can take it with you. but when it came time to start. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. You also need to tell your body it’s time to go. body and emotions to perform and to mentally rehearse your strategies. The idea is to link a thought (NOW!”) with an emotion (“I’m ready!) and an action (GO!) to tell your mind. can be viewed as a distraction. If you travel. One athlete I worked with had forgotten this requirement after first learning this tool. She chose a cloud as her focal point. If you are in your office or in a conference room.simply applied a band-aid. try to use the same type of focal point. A tangible engagement cue. An engagement cue typically is the last component of a success routine. such as a doorframe. works well. Yet. Before you perform. © Copyright 2003. This leads to a less than stellar performance. Put something in your performance arena that you physically cross before you perform. A focal point is a designated item in your environment that you use to bring you back to the task at hand. consciously look at your focal point. “Go!” I have seen elite performers do everything right in preparing for a performance. select an easily viewed item to serve as a focal point. It immediately precedes the performance and says. prior to a presentation or meeting. they forgot to tell themselves to turn it on. I image a red line on the floor. you might choose a banner. These distractions can come from any direction at any time. Any time you get distracted. the sooner you will free up energy to give to other important tasks. When she found herself drifting away from her strategy and went looking for her focal point . a piece of art. . it’s not sufficient to just prime yourself for your best performance. Focal Point: You could quickly complete a list of possible distractions in your work and personal environments. As I cross the line. . Your focal point should be stationary so it’s available any time you need it.net 92 . Train your mind to equate looking at that object with thinking. “OK. it also had drifted off. These aspects are covered in Chapter 12 of Selling. The sooner you take care of this larger energy-draining issue. even if it is a good thing. As you travel or perform in different locations.
Conclusion The reality is that you already incorporate routines or some sort of ritualistic behavior in your work (and personal) life. Replacing maladaptive routines with ones that appropriately prepare your mind. alcohol. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att.D. Ph. become aware of any bad habits or maladaptive routines you have established along the way. Practice your success rituals until they become second nature. and healthier lives. better. is President of Best Life Design.com or www. concentration. Mollie Marti. Visit her at www. J. they will provide great consistency. Scour your daily activities for any routine actions that undermine your performance. happier. and food as relaxation or coping techniques. © Copyright 2003. and success. This means that if you get away from your rituals. A close companion is the use of stimulants. you will be able to choose to perform at the highest level available to you at any time. even if you don’t call it a success ritual or routine. ask those closest to you what you consistently do every morning upon arriving at work or every time you prepare for an appointment. body and emotions for performing at a high level can provide a quantum leap forward in your performance. it won’t feel right. including caffeine and adrenaline. to compensate for a lack of high quality sleep.net 93 . successful entrepreneur.bestlifedesign. More subtle examples include skipping breakfast and overusing the internet. She is an Adjunct Professor at the University of Iowa Department of Psychology and is widely published in academic journals of psychology and human behavior. mediator... The good news is this means that when you regularly use success rituals. If you cannot identify your rituals.com for more information on how Mollie shares tools and lessons from her rich and varied experience as a psychologist.Train your mind to equate your engagement cue with flipping the ON switch and you will experience a whole new level of focus. She also is co-author of The 12 Factors of Business Success and Selling: Powerful New Strategies for Sales Success. Inc. performance coach. When you harness the power of success rituals and performance routines. lawyer.D. Common ones are the misuse of drugs. Take some time to identify these elements and use the information here to revise and strengthen your success rituals. As part of this process. It will throw you off. and working mother to help others design and live their best life. a life and business coaching organization that empowers people to design and live bigger.molliemarti.
S SELF-CONFIDENCE, SELF-TALK, STRESS (INCLUDING DESRESS); STUCK SELF CONFIDENCE
Frequently due to circumstances that we cannot readily change or control, we are forced into situations that simply are not healthy. They are detrimental to our selfesteem, self-confidence, even our physical health and well being. Ultimately these situation can erode your feelings of self worth and confidence. Using hypnosis for building self confidence is a clever, pleasant and effective way to quickly restore confidence. We can all benefit from increased self confidence in certain situations, and it is possible to harness the power of natural mental states to boost confidence when we need it. Using your imagination and your subconscious for building or rebuilding self confidence works because it creates a powerful, detailed imprint of what it’s like to be confident; an imprint that you can access over and over to reinforce this image into your subconscious. There are few traits more important than self confidence. When you value yourself, you treat yourself well, and others will follow suit. It can make your whole life better. You can improve your self confidence by using visualization and guided imagery. Studies have shown that by practicing short intervals of visualization and creating a detail imprint, you are training your mind, preparing yourself so that you know what it looks like and what it feels like to have the self confidence you are seeking. Positive thinking, affirmations and suggestions not only help you learn how to improve your self confidence, they can dramatically improve the overall quality of your life. Your mind believes whatever you tell it, so stop talking trash about yourself, stop thinking negatively about yourself.
It occurred to me the other day after overhearing a conversation, that I should write down some of the thoughts, suggestions and techniques I use with my clients as part of our therapy sessions when they have decided that it is time to change something in their life. Such as when they have decided that they want to take back control of their life and their actions by taking control of their thoughts and in that way actively creating their own life rather than passively watching it pass them by. These thoughts, suggestions and techniques are something that every one of us can use and benefit from.
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Life often requires us to do many things that we really don’t want to be doing. As a result of this we can get so used to the feelings of frustration, irritation, loss of control and dissatisfaction, that it frequently starts to become the norm. We start to believe that maybe we will never get the chance to indulge ourselves in doing those things that we really want and to do. We can get so wrapped up in the mechanics of survival that we fail to recognize or respond to the opportunities for fun, love, success and abundance presented to us each and every day. Your life does not have to be determined by the whims, addictions and negative behavior patterns of those around you or even from your own past. You have the power to take control. You have the power to live the life you dream of. You have the ability to reclaim and empower yourself! A big part of that power is your own self-talk. We all know that little voice inside that tells us we can’t do something or it’s too late or it’s too hard. That voice that makes us afraid we’ll fail. Always remember this, it is our desires that keep us alive and magnetic. It is our desires that make us sparkle from within and attract what we want. People without strong desires slowly whither away, living only shadow lives of who they are supposed to be. It is our very own negative self-talk that destroys our desire by destroying the belief that you can have what you want. The more we allow desire to flow through us, the more vibrant, alive and connected we become and life just keeps getting better and better. Feed that desire with your dreams and your visualizations. Stop that voice in your head that says “I can’t” and change it to “I will!”
Stress, Friend or Foe What is stress? Stress is the wear and tear our bodies experience as we adjust to our continually changing environment; it has definite and specific physical and emotional effects on us that can create both positive and negative feelings. And as many of you experience during the holidays, it can run rampant. But, is stress really the enemy that we’ve been told it is? Or is it possible that stress could be a friend? As a positive influence, stress can help compel us into action; it can result in a new awareness and an exciting new perspective on our situation, an existing relationship or even a new life.
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Yes, it is true that as a negative influence it can result in feelings of distrust, rejections, anger and depression which in turn can lead to health problems. With the death of a loved one, birth of a child, change in job, change in residence, end of a relationship, divorce, or even the start of a new relationship, we experience stress as we readjust our lives to the changing circumstances. In adjusting to these changing circumstances, stress can either help or hinder us depending on how we react to it, what we think about it and how we choose to use it. Positive stress can add anticipation and excitement to life. Deadlines and competitions add depth and enrichment to our lives. Positive stress motivates us and can be the driving force behind positive changes. The goal is not to eliminate stress, but to learn how to perceive it, manage it, control it and use it to help ourselves. Remember, how we each perceive any event determines how we react to it physically and emotionally. It also determines whether we perceive that event as a good thing or as something to be dreaded and feared. Keep your focus on what you want and on how you want to feel, and use the stress in your life to move towards those positive images rather than focusing on all the obstacles you “might” encounter. So, again, is stress a friend or a foe? When you take control and use stress rather than allowing it to use and control you, it can definitely be a friend! However, for those times when stress has become a liability by becoming so pervasive in your life that the quality of your life is negatively affected, it can be necessary to de-stress yourself and your life a bit. De-Stress Your Life There are numerous studies that show the one thing we all have in common these days is stress. Stress is such a prevalent problem that more than 800,000 people a day miss work because of a stress related illness! When stress has become a problem in our lives, we may experience a variety of symptoms including headaches or migraines, anxiety attacks, pounding heart, sadness and depression, back or neck tension, stomach problems, irritability, moodiness, overeating, fatigue, frequent colds, and more. Do you find yourself always busy, always on the run, always feeling stressed out? What causes stress in your life? If I were to tell you that negative emotions and bad food choices were part of the problem, would you believe me? It’s the truth that sometimes the food we eat can be part of the cause of our stress. Besides, when you have no time and are running everywhere eating healthy seems
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exhaustion. Avoid refined sugars which raise our insulin levels so quickly that when they drop we feel it emotionally as well as physically. asparagus. Almonds. The first step to de-stressing is to break this cycle. If you understand that there are foods which aggravate negative emotions such as anger. mustard greens. moodiness and nervousness. prunes. seafood. Who has time to cook when the drive through is so much faster. Eat more seafood or seaweed (how about some sushi?) to get more Vitamin B12. Our body needs a proper balance between magnesium and calcium to have a healthy stress response. fear. irritability. A deficiency of magnesium interferes with the transmission of nerve and muscle impulses. oats. brown rice. Studies have shown that people who are depressed have low levels of B6 and serotonin. salmon. Stay away from caffeine and alcohol. impatience. worry. depression.net 97 . tofu and yogurt or yogurt products. Vitamin B12. spinach and salmon all contain Magnesium. Instead we tend to switch to processed foods which causes our bodies to get even more stressed and we start on a vicious circle. bananas. You should incorporate them as much as possible into your diet when you know you are fighting stress. Calcium rich foods are almonds. Trans fatty acids reduce circulation and raise blood pressure which keeps our body in a constant state of stress. Eating foods rich in anti-stress vitamins and minerals will help counteract the effects of stress. garlic. causing irritability and nervousness. broccoli. then you can avoid those foods to start your de-stressing procedure.to be one of the first things that goes. etc. Vitamin B12 deficiency can contribute to many anxiety based disorders caused by stress. Caffeine boosts the production of adrenaline (a stress hormone) and alcohol causes an imbalance in our blood sugar level which can lead to insomnia which is another thing that causes stress to both your body and mind. when we are under stress we actually need even better quality meals to help us stay focused and in balance. apricots. blood sugar fluctuations. Calcium. You need eat more avocados. irritability. fish. © Copyright 2003. such as hormonal imbalances. cabbage. apples. Vitamin B6. kale. spinach and walnuts to get more Vitamin B6. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. kelp. leafy vegetables. depression. Avoid foods with trans fatty acids which you find in junk food and refined carbohydrates. Unfortunately. chronic fatigue. sesame seeds. It has been found that people under stress have low magnesium levels. Some of these nutrients are: Magnesium.
com © Copyright 2003. To express your feelings and thoughts you can either call a friend or talk to your pet (pets are even better listeners. This isn’t a power walk so stop and enjoy the nature. our cortisol levels drop. Start squeezing something. such as a squishy ball. or to sign up for her free Newsletter with Healthy Tips and Recipes or check on her eBooks “DeStress-101” and “Detox-101” visit her website: http://www. For more information about her Women’s Health and Wellness Programs and Retreats. Squeeze a squishy ball. mushrooms. Hypnosis is the best way to achieve deep relaxation. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Sing. oranges.com who works with women who have stress or weight management issues and are experiencing increased appetite. brown rice. Some fresh air and moderate exercise can help clear your mind and reduce frustration.net 98 . dates. mood swings. the real key to experiencing feelings of pleasure. salmon. oatmeal. Kiss. We all know now that extreme stress can release cortisol which is a factor in many diseases and illnesses. lentils. Bottom line though.naturalcounselor. our family? So let us be stress smart. In addition. carrots and turnips). you can lower your stress level in a second with these instant mood lifters: Laugh.” Much of the information used in this article is from Irina Wardas. nobody will. you must relax. tuna and whole grains. a founder of NaturalCounselor. Foods rich in folate are asparagus. legumes. Studies have shown that even forced laughter lowers cortisol and blood pressure instantly.Folic acid. Studies have shown that folic acid helps make dopamine. but if something happens to us. Walk. root vegetables (such as potatoes. green leafy vegetables. insomnia or lack of energy. barley. is to reduce cortisol levels and normalize your metabolism. to work away your tension. A study just conducted has shown that immediately after a kiss. I know mine always have been). Recent studies show that singing your favorite tunes is more beneficial than simply listening to them. See Emotions and Illness and Healing and Hypnosis for more information on this. Call a friend. As Irina Wardas says: “I always tell my clients: if we don’t take care of ourselves. Studies show that having a conversation with someone you care about causes the same kind of positive physiological changes that a massage does. though. who will take care of our children.
If you expect your spouse or lover to forget your anniversary or birthday. you’ll be setting the stage for a similar confrontation every year you are together. but to the energy of the present moment. Now I am happy to say that feeling doesn’t come anymore and I want to share this information with you. If you understand that. It is also true that energy attracts like energy (sort of like a magnet) and that your outer world really is a direct reflection of what is going on inside you and inside your head. You think about your lack of money and you think about your need and you begin to tighten up. then you are doing nothing more than bringing the same vibrational energy to every new situation. Energy is constantly in motion. then you can begin to realize how this feeling of being stuck is just that. you’ll attract more debt for tomorrow. NewBeginnings firstname.lastname@example.org 99 . you’ll have that same illness or perhaps something even worse tomorrow and next week.” If you find the same situations appearing over and over again. You try to think about a solution to change the situation but all you can think about is your fear and your need and you tighten up even more. As much as you may want to blame your childhood or your “ex”. that nasty feeling that there’s nothing you can do about the situation you find yourself in. According to the laws of physics. a feeling. Every morning you wake up and declare that you are “stuck” in debt. If you wake up today focusing on debt. the same repeating external circumstances that merely mirror your old set of expectations. because you cannot stand still. if you are having a problem with money. Just remember this “Nothing is Ever Really Stuck. As Abraham Hicks explains: “Sometimes we hear you say ‘I’m stuck’ and we say ‘No you’re not stuck. I know I have.STUCK (OR NOT) Have you ever felt stuck? You know. You think about the future and you tighten up even more. the truth is that what you are thinking this very moment determines the energy that you attract into your life right now and this then becomes the life you are living. For example. I used to feel that way often. It isn’t a physical reality (although it sure can feel like one). It is important to keep in mind that this reflection you see is never really acting in response to energy from your past. there is no such thing as being ‘stuck’. If you wake up today affirming an illness. Then one day I decided to go back to school and become a hypnotherapist. it is more likely that every morning you wake up and you focus on the feeling of being in debt than it is that you wake up focusing on how much you have. You cannot stop emitting a © Copyright 2003.
A good place to begin is by making a list of the areas in your life that feel stuck.net 100 . And. Harvard University psychologist Carol Ginandes. You need to make room for change. This process of transformation and healing can take place almost immediately. The group’s judgment: Patients who had received hypnosis were farther along the road to recovery. Instead what is happening is that you are creating the same thing over and over again. smooth. can influence the body to heal itself. “We’re talking about structural tissue healing. for example. Ph. © Copyright 2003. the women were encouraged to think of pain as “sensations of healing” and to visualize their incisions “knitting together rapidly and becoming strong.vibration so it is not possible you are stuck.D.” Ginandes says. but it can make you more receptive to suggestions. and elastic. our results suggest. Take this list and think about those areas where you may have been holding these situations in place and then allow for the possibility that you do have the power to change your thoughts thereby changing what surrounds you and your environment. says University of Washington psychologist David Patterson. It is only important that it does. The most astonishing evidence of just what the mind can do comes from research on healing. The sessions you received with this book will help you begin this process of getting un-stuck quickly and easily. In a follow-up experiment published last year. speak directly to your conscious and subconscious mind.” An independent team of surgeons and nurses later examined the women and reviewed photographs of the incisions that were taken 1 week and 7 weeks after surgery. Patients who suffer from panic attacks. the truth is. can be encouraged to think of frightening situations in new and less alarming ways. By using hypnosis and working from the inside out. Ginandes and her research team found that women who’d had breast reduction surgery recovered more quickly after undergoing hypnosis. releasing what you no longer need and replacing it with possibilities. During the sessions. Allow the Universe to bring you a slightly different experience tomorrow and the next day. you simply need to make room for the possibility of something different. showed that hypnosis can help broken bones heal faster.” So. You don’t have to create change. In a pilot study published in 1999.” Hypnosis can’t make you do things they you want to do.. Pain sufferers. that you may have created it and allow for the possibility that if you created it then you can un-create it and create something far better. Hypnosis. “We’re not just talking about people simply feeling better. meanwhile.D. for most people. Allow for the possibility that you may be partly responsible for this feeling you have. it doesn’t matter why it works. how can you feel unstuck? It’s very simple. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. It’s changing but it’s changing to the same thing. really. Ph. can move their perception of pain from the foreground of their minds to the background.
it is what feels best for you. the more you visualize or imagine what you want. When you have determined the directions of past and future. You can take something like your Snapshot image and literally place it onto your Time Line in the future. This is where Time Line Imagery can help you. the stronger they become and the more developed the neuro pathways get. the more you train your mind into accepting and creating it. to the left or to the right. just to recognize it so that you can more easily burn it away from your Time Line. If it’s behind you. The positive work that you can do with the image of your Time Line and placing a snapshot into your future is something you can and should do often. Take responsibility for your life and direction. Just imagine that you are rising above your Time Line and then imagine that you are moving forward in the future and placing your snapshot onto the road. But you can develop new and different neuro pathways by thinking new and different thoughts.T TIMELINE THERAPY TIME LINE THERAPY IMAGERY Time Line Imagery is a visualization exercise that is effective when looking for trigger points from your past and setting a goal of desire into your future. maybe look for some signs that give you an indication of timeframe or create your own. So whenever you find yourself slipping into old habits and old thoughts that don’t do you any good use your Time Line to place your Snapshot into your future. To start the process of determining your own personal Time Line. Take your time with this. Time Line Imagery is also a way for the conscious mind to communicate with the subconscious mind bringing up images or thoughts that may have been repressed. you imagine that you are rising above the ground and ask yourself which direction is in your past. imagine it is like a road and notice if it is straight or curved or if there is anything unusual about it.net 101 . Then you ask yourself which direction is your future. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. You can also use this therapy to remove negative emotions from your past by determining the first triggering event for each. Just remember that when working with the past it isn’t necessary to re-experience the emotion when you have found your first triggering event. for you happiness and your abundance. the more you focus on old negative thoughts. your love and your joy. Remember. Remember. This is a long and can be a complicated procedure and is best done with a hypnotherapist or guide who is familiar with the technique. There is no correct answers. © Copyright 2003. look down on the Time Line.
What you need is just someone to say I’m sorry this happened and I’m here for you. You procrastinated. It might not have looked that way to others. I’d like you to consider another alternative. bad things just happen.net 102 .U UNCONDITIONAL LOVE UNCONDITIONAL LOVE Sometimes no matter how hard you try to keep your thoughts positive and practice being grateful. They can’t possibly know how you may have been emotionally ripped apart by a person or an event or a situation and how those scars can linger. Perhaps you didn’t do what you should have when you should have. you made a mistake. They can’t experience the triggers that you might from your past and they can have no idea that you are doing you best at that moment. all you need is to have the people you love just be there for you. Things that can look to others as if you are to blame. It’s amazing what we can do and get through when we know we are loved and needed. but no one else can know all that we each have to consider and deal with. You need them to tell you to be strong. you stuck by the wrong person. © Copyright 2003. The act of giving love unconditionally gives you clarity and freedom and it let’s you find your way back from the dark places into the light. This is what I learned and this is the gift I give to those I love. I’ve been through some really difficult times in this life. Without getting specific about each of them. Sometimes what you need. to keep it together and keep going because they need you in their life. It can look that way to others. I can say that each time I h ad to make a decision. You don’t need their advice and you do not need them to point out the mistakes you’ve made (you probably already know them intimately yourself). NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. I looked at all sides and all options and the decision that I made was a considered decision that was the best choice at that time under those circumstances. even if they cannot give it back.
while another may be a Wiccan. one person may go to church every Sunday and pray even night and that would be their form of Spirituality. VICTIMHOOD. the first step is to understand the value areas of your life.net 103 . NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Bring a blank piece of paper and pen. VISUALIZATION In any manifestation work that you may be considering. Close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing for a few moments. whatever feels right. Using the Value Areas of Life is a good place to start. Just as there are different families and different types of relationships. Picture yourself at age 80. Spirituality. but I think this works better: Health/Fitness Fun/Recreation Home/Environment Spirituality Career Family Relationships/Romance Personal Growth/Development Before you can manifest something into your life. 90. These are: VALUE AREAS OF LIFE Career Spirituality Health/Fitness Family Relationships Personal Growth & Development These Value Areas are basically the same for all of us although it may not appear that way. You don’t have to agree or understand it to realize that there are different forms of Spirituality. Then visualize or imagine you are nearing the end of your life. For example. 85.V VALUE AREAS OF LIFE. find a quiet place to sit for twenty minutes or so. The Value Areas of Life that I created and prefer to work with is a bit more detailed. you need to define what it is you want. etc. © Copyright 2003. First. another may practice Hinduism.
You might get angry. But Victimhood isn’t just about relationships. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Most things or events aren’t intrinsically “right” or “wrong”. if the person you are proposing this practice to believes something entirely different. to clarify what each of you expects in the relationship or from the other person. What you might think is wrong.Now think back over your life. However. We grab it and cling to it like a life raft. then your perception makes it right. Something very unpleasant. Our perception of what a relationship should be makes this wrong. Is it wrong? Is it right? The only person who can know if it’s right for you. What value areas of your life are you happy with. It is so much better to find out in the first few months of a relationship. Does that make one of you right and one of you wrong? It depends on your perception! One thing it does do is demonstrate the importance of communication. many times it only takes a small shift to change the direction of any area of your life and awareness is the first step from which your bright new future can flow. there is nothing wrong with having more than one husband or wife and yet most of us would be outraged if our spouse suggested another mate. mugged or even raped. VICTIMHOOD Why do we choose to beat ourselves up over things that we’ve done. Figure it out early. Remember. but not only that. frequently things that are done to us? We seem to have a desire or a need to make ourselves a victim. friends. Let’s say something unpleasant happens to you. we assign those words to them based on our own perceptions of them. rather than after several years and one of you ends up feeling like a victim. are you really meant to be together. © Copyright 2003. If it is what you believe. Perhaps you are abused.net 104 . Think about all the value areas of your life. or even the perceptions of our family. That somehow they brought this on themselves!!! And why is it that so many of us embrace that thought and that feeling. What areas cause you regret. but I wanted to use an extreme example in order to show that in any relationship it is crucial to communicate with each other. can differences be resolved and can you move forward with each other. but so often the victim feels that it was their own fault. then you’ve got a problem. Then start to write down your thoughts and feelings about each of these areas. you will certainly feel violated. church and society. is you. What areas do you feel fulfilled in. I understand that the above example is a bit extreme and perhaps even offensive. I might find perfectly acceptable and vice versa. In a culture that believes in and it is legal to practice polygamy.
to take back control of your life and to create the life you want to experience with all the fun. A victim can always blame anything on outside circumstances. A rather sad. isn’t there something wrong with a world that encourages us to think of ourselves as powerless victims? Isn’t it time to stop? I think it’s time to acknowledge your power. And. happiness and joy available to each of us. There are certain advantages to choosing Victimhood as a way of life. It becomes VICTIMHOOD! Believe me. however. etc. initially you might say NO! I have not decided that. my mother didn’t give me enough love. And what is the underlying message in virtually all 12-step programs? “That you are powerless in the face of your addiction. Have you fallen prey to Victimhood? Oh. It’s not my fault I cheated on my wife. You can find a 12-step program for any addiction you can possibly think of. It’s not my fault I use drugs or drink too much.S. 12step programs rum rampant and they almost seem to have taken the place of social clubs as a means of meeting people. it’s because I’m in a bad relationship and it’s not my fault I’m in a bad relationship. But just take a moment now and really think about it. my wife doesn’t understand me. unfulfilled and unhappy way of life.” But. This can be directly related to the epidemic of addiction that the world seems to be suffering from. my friends don’t understand me. you do not ever have to take responsibility for anything in your life.net 105 . let’s look at what being a victim really means to the person who has embraced Victimhood. I had a horrible childhood and my wife (or husband) cheated on me. Life. my father was never there to teach me or guide me. although I have to admit that it was a bit addictive. But now. my kids don’t show me any respect. It’s not my fault I can’t keep a job. it’s not my fault! It’s not my fault I can’t commit to another person. is so much sweeter when you take responsibility for your actions. my mother didn’t understand me.. my husband ignores me. it means you are not responsible for anything. etc. etc. if you do this often enough it becomes a way of life.I want you to consider something. I do understand how it feels and how it works because I took a little trip to “Victimhoodland” myself for a period of time. and society actually encourages this thought. When you can acknowledge how strong you really are. for what you do and what you say.. my parents had a horrible marriage so what could you expect. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. Here in the U. you can take back control and rediscover © Copyright 2003. Have you made the decision that you are a victim? Think about that because that decision will affect your entire future. Perhaps the most alluring is that if you are perceived as a victim. It wasn’t fun. Nothing is your fault because you are a victim.
If we take back control. Choosing Victimhood means choosing not to be happy. We waste precious days and years getting so caught up in our worry and fear and Victimhood that we hardly think of anything else. The woman who has come out of a nasty. One of the underlying motivations for Victimhood is fear. thinking of relaxing by the seaside with soft breezes and warm weather can increase your feelings of relaxation and thus reducing stress. Fixing a problem in one place though.who you are. etc. As stated in Woman’s World. Simply. Remember. we lose everything. etc.. never © Copyright 2003.net 106 . And there are hundred and thousands of stories just like those that show us. The man who came from a loveless home and can continue to search for the right relationship and woman to love is strong and sensitive with a big. please. the clouds will clear and we can see how silly we have been. thinking of a beloved pet can increase feeling of compassion and security. You had to be amazing to live through all that crap that made you feel like a victim in the first place and to keep on going. Conscious awareness of this process is the first step to taking back control and living the life you were meant to live. VISUALIZATION More and more doctors and patients have recognized that mental state and physical well-being are connected. If that is taken away from us . you cannot have a healthy body or mind without the other also being healthy. bad relationship and can keep on going. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. September 26. For example. An unhealthy body will ultimately lead to an unhealthy mind with such problems as depression and anxiety.” This same article goes on to suggest various visualizations to help reduce your stress. is powerful beyond belief. build self-confidence. can often help the other. “Visualization is a powerful tool to change your thinking. boost your mood. and an illness of the mind can trigger or worsen diseases in the body. because your brain reacts to whatever you imagine as if it were reality. It means choosing to be constantly dissatisfied with the things around us and with our lives. we can move beyond the Victimhood mentality. feel more loved. eventually. Imagery and visualization have long been used in hypnosis as a means of changing and improving your life using these techniques with hypnosis can increase the benefits and give you a very powerful tool for you to use. All too often we let this fear get the better of us. each of us. 2006. it is the ability to enjoy life.or if we inadvertently cut ourselves off from it with Victimhood. The child who survives abuse is amazingly self-reliant and strong. We will see that our most valuable possession is not life. just how powerful we are or could be if we are willing to accept that power and that strength and if we can just accept that fact. You had to be strong. beautiful heart and so much love to give.
yes imagery and visualization can change your life. what you will be attempting to do is putting yourself into a highly suggestible state when it will be virtually impossible to keep your thoughts positive.net 107 . increase your self-confidence. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. relieve pain. this would be the time to consult a hypnotherapist or use a CD to achieve your desired results. your imagination. If you are feeling down. boost your mood and a whole world of good things IF you can keep your own negative self-talk from jumping into the conversation! Studies have shown that by practicing short intervals of visualization. Is essence. Use the power of your mind. you are training your mind and preparing yourself so that you know what it looks like and what it feels like to have what you are seeing with your visualization. depressed or negative. your ability to visualize and your subconscious to create the life and the world you want to live in. can change how your feel. So. © Copyright 2003.practice self-hypnosis when you are feeling down.
Why are you not already thereat the weight you want to be? 2. The problem is that we are beginning to realize that popping a pill doesn’t fix anything and sometimes just makes things worse. If. you can start with these questions about your eating habits: 1. something is good for you and then it is bad and then guess what. scientists. bleached flour. We’ve become the generation of pop a pill to fix everything. Not only that. the participants that were interview for each diet also felt that the one they had used for the best. dietitians and commercials are trying to keep us confused? First. diet and weight. you are serious and willing to take the time to make some life changes.e. Do you eat a lot of sugar? Specifically what kind of sugar? (i. The truth is. the only diet that had ever worked for them. however. First one. it’s good again. How is your water consumption? At meals do you overeat? (Or do you overeat only at one meal?) Do you believe you can lose weight? © Copyright 2003. I was reading the other day an analysis of three different diets. 5. alcohol. Then you add to that the natural human tendency (at this in our modern world) to want something instantaneously. included six small meals a day. moderation solves most of the problems and confusion regarding food. the creators of which all think theirs is the best for losing weight. WOUNDS WEIGHT Weight and Confusion Doesn’t it seem as if all the doctors. refined. WORDS. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att.) 3. before facts have actually been verified.. we just don’t want to take the time to do it and we don’t want to expend the time and energy to balance our food intake with the appropriate amount of exercise. the second one was only three and the third one was actually only one meal a day.W WEIGHT. 4. Confusing. etc. and in reality most of us really do know what a healthy diet consists of. Press releases are sent out and scientific findings are published and drug companies start promotional campaigns as soon as they are given the green light. you bet!!! Part of the problem is that we are simply getting too much information on very limited aspects and we are getting it too soon.net 108 .
what percentage is eaten out of true hunger or is it eaten because of: • • • • • • • • 16. 9. Do you eat breakfast? 15. Do you associate a person. © Copyright 2003. Has your mother. 7. 18. 10. 8. boredom stress time of day depression reward other people anxiety companionship Do you reach for food for any of the above reasons? Do you relate to any of the above reasons? Do you experience any of the above reasons on a daily basis? Why do you want to lose the weight? How will your life be different when you reach this goal? Once you have answered these questions. place or activity with overeating or types of food with overeating? 14. 17. father or siblings had a problem with weight? If they had a problem were they successful in controlling the problem and what did they use or do to control the problem? 12. NewBeginnings email@example.com. 19. 20. you will have a much better understanding of your relationship to food and your current weight and will be able to make intelligent decisions regarding food choices and behavior changes. Is there a time of day that is harder for you to control food? Do you snack between meals? What kinds of snacks? Do you consume alcohol? How much? Do you exercise or what is your activity level? What have you done in the past to lose weight? 11. Do you have cravings for salt? 13. Out of all the food you eat in a day.net 109 .
causing us to doubt ourselves and our decisions. but you can take back control and you can reverse much of the damage that was done. but the wounds that are created by hearing hurtful words (especially when those words come from a loved one) stay with us for years eating away and corroding our self-image.net 110 . We are able to watch what happens to the brain as we think different thoughts and visualize different images. WRONG! Words have power. so can we develop neuro pathways within the mind. You had to be amazing to live through all that crap that made you feel like a victim in the first place and to keep on going. More often than not. Sound too easy? The truth is that it is actually easier than you might believe. You had to be strong. It is along these neuro pathways that all thoughts and emotions travel. confidence and happiness. self-confidence. The second step is to take control of your thoughts. Abuse victims.Now. Words have so much power that they can destroy reputations and ruin lives. The first step is to acknowledge how strong you really are. you know that as strange as it may sound. Science has given us the capability of being able to look at and in the human brain while it is working and to actually see how it is functioning. WORDS Sticks and Stones…… I’m sure you’ve heard that childhood saying “sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me”. We heal from physical injuries. For those of you who have lived in an emotionally abusive situation. You can decide that you are not going to be a victim. it must also be noted that weight issues are rarely just about weight. You can imagine how difficult living a life like this can be. Science has taught us that just as we can develop any muscle in our body by “using” it. it is frequently easier to deal with physical abuse than it is the words that are said during an emotional attack. It is almost always linked to how we perceive ourselves and it is this internal raging of feelings and emotions that are responsible for the negative behavior patterns we find within ourselves. You know © Copyright 2003. a lack of fulfillment. they include abandonment issues. by working it. survivors. Forcing us to second guess every thing we do and say. thousands of stories that show us just how powerful we are if we are willing to accept that power and that strength. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. satisfaction. It becomes necessary to release our negative thoughts. having said all that. feelings and emotions to allow ourselves to move forward with any goal including weight changes.
As a matter of fact. dreams and desires. someone will answer. And for each of us. but not only that. For every negative thought or image that either comes into your mind or is forced into your mind. it becomes even more important for you to counteract those words with thoughts that you control.] Take the time to remember each and every good thing that has happened to you throughout the day. And that’s what venting to another is. Vent when you are alone. your talent. There are options out there and there are people and organizations that can help you get away. friend before you utter those hurtful words that can never be taken back. Make some calls. keep your thoughts strong. Instead they start hurting again given certain triggering events. think before you speak because despite that childhood saying……. But most of all. lover. please take the time to think about what you are saying to your child. Think and dream about your future. Also. Your life depends on it After all. I have to say this. Saying you are sorry doesn’t counteract the damage that was done in an instant of self-gratification. eating up those smaller neuro pathways that you have allowed to atrophy and that are unfortunate enough to reside nearby. The same holds true for what you hear. find out what you can do. words can hurt you.net 111 . scream and yell and swear all you want. most enjoyable and fastest way to do this. throughout your life entire life. [Please remember hypnosis is probably the best. this planet needs you. Take the time and allow your desires to flow through you. what do you have without you? You need to preserve the miracle that is you. husband. think a negative thought constantly and you develop a neuro pathway for that negative thought that becomes larger. call out for help. subconsciously we © Copyright 2003. When this occurs. WOUNDS Deep Emotional Wounds There are those wounds that do not heal with the passage of time. This is why “words” do have so much power. intelligence and compassion. Once said they are out there forever. take the time to take back control and think 100 times more about your hopes. If you are with someone who is abusing you in any way. wife. Don’t ever delude yourself that it is anything more than self-gratification. I know when you are beaten down it is hard to see any options other than the one you find yourself in. But you are wrong. If you are around someone who constantly criticizes you or berates you or even worse. leave! Remove yourself from that situation and run as far and fast as you can. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. wider and stronger each and every day. But when you are with someone you care about.because I say it over and over again.
we ourselves can become hurtful without actually wanting or meaning to. or. If you can do this. much like arthritis in wet weather. you have the opportunity to bring these painful wounds to light.net 112 . NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. If you do not feel ready for that. Maybe just knowing that it is normal for these wounds to continue to hurt. especially in interpersonal situations. you can bring these wounds to light under the soothing blanket of hypnosis. Looking at painful experiences in this way can set you free.withdraw into ourselves. Releasing sessions can work well with these. try doing it during a conversation with someone who is close to you. However. can help. © Copyright 2003. It helps to realize that you are not the only one who experiences this. when things are going smoothly. we get overly sensitive and we can react in a hurt manner without apparent reason. improve your close relationships and heal your relationship with your own body.
the body you want. What do you see now? What are these images like? Is there good health. energy. clear skin. clear and easy breathing. vital. the decision becomes easy. doesn’t it?. It could be that you want to quit smoking or maybe you’ve decided that you need to stop drinking. Make a commitment and a decision. DRINKER. what is different and better. drinker. Before you make that decision. What do you look like. All you need is a clear image of your two futures and then see yourself going down the right road and into the right future. And now let those images fade completely away. BINGER ETC. Visualize or imagine that 10 years have past and you are now an ex-smoker. powerfully alive and free from the chains of any addiction. Of these two possible futures in your life. Once you decide that you want to quit.net 113 .X X SMOKER. Notice how you feel. are you now sure which one you want. You can choose to live your life. drinking. Notice what you see. I want you to take a moment now and visualize or imagine that 10 years have past and you are still smoking. Whatever it is. healthy. When you have done this. Perhaps you have an eating disorder and it is time to stop. Wait 10-20 seconds. Take a moment and let these images form clearly. binging or doing whatever it is that you think you need to quit doing. © Copyright 2003. Make a promise to yourself. strong. you have a decision to make. Wait 10-20 seconds. binger or whatever. TWO FUTURES You want to stop doing something. You have the opportunity to see a different future. your energy will flow in that direction. vibrant. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. very clearly. What is your breathing like? How is your health? What does your skin look like? Your teeth? What does that life look and feel like? Is there even a life or is what you are doing killing you? Let these images form clearly.
It was created by by Holly Gleason of “The Yummy List” and Huffington Post.com. joy. Everything in life is a choice. your entire belief system.net 114 . but I loved the name so much that I just had to reference it here. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. YUMMY LIST I did not come up with this wonderful name of the Yummy List. In every phase of your life you need to be aware. Incorporating hypnotherapy as one of the tools available to you for your use in implementing your choices and talking directly to your subconscious can greatly speed up this process of believing in possibilities from the inside out. happiness. it does not mean you will receive it. And you need to know that when you make choices that express the real you. but as time goes on and you increase the weight you are lifting. Compare it to strength training. your life becomes yours and it will feel richer and thicker and fuller. You need to know that no matter what things might look like or what situation you currently find yourself in. the first step is to choose at a conscious level what you want and then you can convince your subconscious that it is possible. you must begin by acknowledging the choice you are making. YUMMY LIST YOUR LIFE SCRIPT Changing Your Life Script How Do You Change Your Life Script? The first step is to wake up and realize you have choice. When you first begin to work your muscles. you may never receive it. your life script.Y YOUR LIFE SCRIPT. Your choice must first tie into the core of your being. a better job. you can choose success and desire a high income or a luxurious home. The challenge is understanding that just because you choose love. In making a choice. prosperity or anything on a conscious level. Daily reminders of the choices you have made will reinforce your internal belief and it will slowly build. and you will begin to see the results of your choices. So. but if you do not believe you can get that home or deserve that home with every level of your being. For instance. you always have a choice. © Copyright 2003. you can only lift a small amount of weight. success. even if you don’t truly believe it at the time. you increase the muscle’s strength and ability.
a yummy list is anything and everything that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. What’s really important is that you make sure you keep in touch with your yummy list. And it is a magical time if you want to manifest your yummy list into your life. the Yummy List is a user’s guide to slowing down. looking around.hollygleason. We hypnotherapists refer to the 30 minutes before we go to sleep as the magic 30 minutes. it’s also anything that makes my eyes sparkle. check it out at www. To find out exactly what The Yummy List is all about. © Copyright 2003. check it regularly.net 115 . It can be pictures cut out of a magazine or your own visual imagery. makes me laugh out loud or makes me say Yum! It can be a list or it can be snapshots or a favorite song or food or a movie. The best time to focus on your yummy list would be just before you go to bed.According to Holly. revise it when something new and yummy catches your attention.com To me. The Yummy List is a random sampling of how sweet life can be. paying attention and experiencing life right where you are. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att.
or ideal and the determination to further that person. Wouldn’t you rather have passion and intensity in your life? Live each moment to the fullest.Z ZEAL Zeal can mean the fervor or tireless devotion for a person. Some of the synonyms for zeal are ardor. cause. or ideal. And always remember this. your life will follow your thoughts so fill your thoughts with zeal! © Copyright 2003. If you have chosen to change your life or any part of your life. fight for your dreams and your goals. intensity and passion. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. cause. it means a diligent enthusiasm. An antonym is apathy. please do it with zeal and without apathy. Apathy will get you nowhere except exactly where you have been.net 116 .
There are 15 points. By working directly with your subconscious you can make the changes you want literally from the inside out. Here’s an example of how you can set an Anchor for relaxation once you are already in a relaxed state (such as immediately after listening to a hypnosis CD or other form of relaxation recording): Anytime you’d like to feel this level of peace and relaxation. EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE The basic EFT technique involves holding a disturbing memory or emotion in mind and simultaneously using the fingers to tap on a series of 12 specific points on the body that correspond to meridians used in Chinese medicine.” and the “sore spot.” “gamut spot. You can also visualize this word in your mind. say out loud RELAX (then spell it out) R-E-L-A-X and repeat this process three times. To make this even more effective. but ultimately only you will know what works best for you.” but for our purposes the karate chop and 12 points will work just fine. Sometimes I will make a specific suggestion that I feel works best. Find the exercise or images or suggestions that “feel” right to you. you can do this simultaneously with a physical Anchor such as rubbing middle finger and thumb together or use a physical object or talisman such as a crystal. This is your anchor for peace and relaxation. ANCHOR With any imagery or feeling that you would like to strengthen or be able to reach quickly. you repeat to yourself: EVEN THOUGH I AM [FILL IN THE BLANK] I DEEPLY AND PROFOUNDLY ACCEPT MYSELF. The first thing you do before tapping is to give yourself three karate chops to one hand and it doesn’t matter which hand.EXERCISES: The following series of exercises. if one includes points nicknamed the “karate-chop point. NewBeginnings firstname.lastname@example.org 117 . While you are doing these three karate chops. © Copyright 2003. imagery and suggestions are designed to help you internalize the flow of your desire and intensify the positive magnetic force you are looking for. it is often helpful to use what we call an “Anchor”.
12. Pick one thing first and go through all 12 Meridian points. I accept myself deeply and profoundly. This is not a sentence. TAPPING: These are the Meridian points for tapping. During the tapping process you state the problem such as “overweight” or “weight issues” or “anxiety” or “fear” or “addiction” or whatever is bothering you. fear. anxiety.Then with the last chop change the sentence to: EVEN THOUGH I AM _____________ I LOVE MYSELF. or AFRAID. 3. 6. you can use just one or two words. 9. I accept myself deeply and profoundly. 5. you tap at least half a dozen times on each point: 1. The blank can be anything you want to work on such as TOO HEAVY. 8. 7. or anything you want changed. I accept myself deeply and profoundly. If you feel you need to work on more than one issue at the same time you can. 10. or DEPRESSED. Inside of one eyebrow (either side) Outside of same eyebrow Below same eye Between lip and nose Just under the chin Just below the collar bone Side of body (where a bra strap would be) Top of the thumb (where cuticle is) Top of index finger Top of third finger Skip ring finger Top of the pinky.” © Copyright 2003. It doesn’t matter which side of the body or which hand you use. Here’s a sample set-up for depression and remember you can modify this for weight. 4. Do what feels right for you. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. but do each issue separately. 2. 11.” “Even though it seems I’m depressed all the time.net 118 . anything: “Even though I’m sometimes depressed.” “Even though I’m depressed most of the time. You can go through the tapping process several times.
your connection with yourself is complete. you throw then right into the center of your heart fire. I love myself. ideas and beliefs within yourself. imagine that there are glass doors surrounding this fireplace that is your heart and now imagine throwing open the doors and allowing oxygen to flow in and feed your heart fire. you also release all negative thoughts. Visualize and imagine that you are fanning the flames and burning all anger. And as you do this you can see this internal fire getting bigger and stronger. by releasing all anger and resentment you reclaim and reconnect with the joyful loving part of yourself. You can see how your body actually is glowing as your feel your heart fire burning brightly. slowly count from 5 down to 1 and with each number focus on your breathing allowing yourself and your body to relax. you can take that anger inside and burn it away. Then imagine your heart is like a fireplace. emotions. And as your heart fire increases. Perhaps it is now just a small spark. visualize or imagine that you can see the spark at the center of your heart. feelings. And as your heart fire increases. Now visualize or imagine that you are taking every instance of anger directed at you and as it reaches you it turns into sticks and logs. uncross your arms and legs. you can watch it grow so large that you can imagine it actually burning outside your body.“Even though it seems I’m depressed all the time. It is also a deepening technique I use in all my sessions. anything that burns quickly and as these stick and logs come at your. you open all pathways to love. Now when you feel your body has relaxed a bit. © Copyright 2003. It is interesting to feel the shift in energy as soon as you do this exercise even once. By burning away all anger and negativity. After using it a few times you will find that just by counting down you will automatically begin the relaxation process. As you do this. Counting from 5 down to 1 is a natural and easy way to feel yourself relax. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. You no longer will try to close off your heart and block the anger. but you are going to visualize it burning right there in the center of your heart. but instead you will imagine it burning like huge logs in a fireplace.” And that’s all there is to it. take a couple of cleansing breathes and allow your eyes to close. And you know that when someone directs anger at you.net 119 . HEART FIRE IMAGERY Here’s the visual exercise I promised you demonstrating how to feed the fuel your heart fire needs to burn bright: Lay back. resentment or negativity away. hurt.
net 120 . Acknowledge to yourself that this is a place where you take care of yourself only and no one else. you will count yourself out of this relaxed state of mind. like salt. hours. weeks. Then imagine that an orange (other any other color you’d prefer) light is flowing into your body and flowing to where the pain is and that this orange light is melting the granules away. Imagine the color intensifies as it melts the granules away. Take yourself fully into this place. feel the warmth of the sun on your face and body. hear it (i. See it. see the image). at the beach. I can feel the rhythm of my breathing gently rock me into an even more comfortable place. If another color comes to mind. allow that color to flow in and out as well. imagine the sound of salt crunching on a hard surface and imagine this is occurring right where the pain is. You will feel completely relaxed and at the same time energized. Read the follow first so that you are familiar with it and then repeat it to yourself: As I close my eyes and take a deep. If you feel like it and have the time. months or even years to be released. glowing orange light flowing in and around your body.. smell it. hear the waves and the birds. smell the salt. I take a moment now and release my subconscious by clearing your mind and visualizing the sky and clouds drifting in the blue sky. Then imagine or visualize white granules. heal yourself and relax yourself. stress or anxiety from the past few minutes.PAIN This exercise can be used for any type of pain from minor to major. When you reach the © Copyright 2003. Get an image of where you will feel at peace and will be comfortable. First by thinking that when you count yourself out and when you reach the number 5 you will be completely out of deep relaxation and no longer suggestible. taking this time right now for myself. Then when you are ready. anyplace. just relax for a few moments and continue to imagine the healing. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. cleansing breath in and let it out. I feel the slowing down that is occurring in my body and mind as I allow all tension. I imagine them coming together and forming the number 5 and then I imagine them drifting apart and coming together again and form the number 4. it can be a room or someplace outdoors. letting myself value and experience it fully as I continue to relax and count myself down to even more relaxation with 5…… 4……. The orange light flowing in and out of your body surrounding your entire body like a cocoon as it continues flowing in and out. days.e. 3…… 2…… 1 and zero – deep relaxation. and I repeat this all the way to the number zero. In this place there is nothing else that you have to do but help yourself.
After you’ve done that pick a word or a very short phrase that when you say it or think it this snapshot image instantly comes to mind. Then count yourself out starting with the number 1 and go up to number 5. You are in charge of your healing and your life. SNAPSHOT The first step is to get a clear picture or several pictures of what you want. feeling the power the strength and the focus that you desire. I’m standing outside on my ranch next to my horses. Here’s my snapshot. relationship. © Copyright 2003. Positive Affirmations to help reduce pain: • • • • You choose to now allow your body to feel strong and free of pain. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. my guy and I are in love. Count from 1 to 5 two or three times. A picture of a goal big or small of whatever you want in your life to replace those things that you don’t want any longer. Here’s an example of one of mine that might help you. The word that will instantly bring this picture to my mind is “Ranch”.net 121 . You choose to feel comfort and safety within yourself. happy and having fun together. thoughts and feelings. emotions.number 5 you will feel the cleansed energy that you earlier released rushing back into your mind and body. You are in control and in charge of your body. Now get a clear image of this picture and make it as detailed as you can. yourself. or whatever it is your desire. there’s a couple of dogs running around in the background and a couple of cats sitting on a fence post. Let go of all tightness within you. I’m laughing and my guy is there smiling with his arms around me and everything simply glows with joy and pleasure. activity. Keep in mind that you can develop one picture or a picture for different parts of your life such as your job. I want my own ranch or enough space and land where I can have all the animals that I want and love to have around me and.
I release all stress and tension from my mind and body. With my thoughts I create my new.net 122 . The Universe is supporting me on all levels as I move forward. I say to myself RANCH. At first it took a bit of work before the negative images completely faded but with just a little bit of persistence and practice. POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS I am ready and willing to move forward in my life now. that picture fills my mind and those other images fade away. My life is becoming more joyful on every level. I am ready to clear away any resistance that will prevent me from moving forward now. © Copyright 2003. I release all fear and anxiety from my mind and body. I choose to forget past mistakes now. I vibrate with positive energy. You will also find that those old nasty images appear less and less until they pretty much disappear. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att. my positive Snapshot came faster and easier and you will find that the same is true for you.Whenever I find my thoughts drifting to that negative self talk that we all occasionally have or when I get to feeling a bit depressed about ever getting that little ranch. positive delightful reality. live in the moment and dream in the future. I keep saying ranch until that image.
. 3.2. 21.... 63............ 115.. 21..... 36.. 5.... 6. 7.. 94...... 37.. 66.......... 127. 60.30 anchor ... 20..... 59.. 71.. 47........ 32..86 addict .. 86.. 12 Elvira Lang . 38........ 23... 79..9....... 90............88 clarity 9... 117.. 77......Index 12-step programs .. 21. 7...... 96.... 24...... 27......... 78 E&P attraction . 89. 3 addiction .. 30 Eric Butterworth ...... 81. 60.... 94. 21... 76....... 124 drinking..... 31. 55 Dawn Abraham ......... 119..... 50. 89...... 56......5...... 95...... 22.. 8....53.. 70... 7. 50...... 58...21 Arreed Barabasz . 21 David Spiegel. 97............. 128. 80... 79........... 41... 48......... 81.. 44.....38.. 47. 1......... 53.... 79 cancer. 122... 36....... 46.. 80... 84..... 109.... 79 dream 1.. 128 anxiety 7. 81..... 58......... 50.. NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att... 22........ 29. 65.. 116 Bereavement ... 35.... 97...... 90.... 127. 38.. 44.... 61.. 30.. 121 drug abuse. 6.... 104........ 22. 7 attraction ... 94..... 112 compassion .... 10... 105.... 113. 21. 110 communication .... 92. 33.. 109...2....5. 37... 114.. 119.. 60... 105 Burkitt’s lymphoma... 8......... 106..............125 anger ......... 47.... 35..30.......... 52. 10... 39............ 26.. 76.... 64......... 5... 33...... 125 Elizabeth Kubler-Ross .....3....... 45....... 130 epilepsy .. 35. 114.... 42....... 78 EFT ..... 89 balance .... 83. 113 Abraham Hicks ...... 79 Carol Ginandes.. 37.. 102... 104.... 52...5....... 52. 105 darkest hour ... 104.. 114... 27........... 97.. 55. 20....... 38... 25. 12...... 18. 78 forgiveness.... 125 energy ......... 121..7. 78 affirmations.. 6.... 60............. 129 diet .. 93. 116 disease.. 78.. 78....... 48.... 21... 63...107 abuse 5. 5.24...... 90 coronary disease.... 44. 78..... 104.... 94........ 71.. 91. 28. 70... 75. 6. 34....... 116. 15....................... 44................ 130 apprehension.5......... 6...7...... 71..... 10 binging . 101..... 38.... 103.... 123. 7....... 95. 107 Cheryl O’Neil .. 97.24..... 114... 31... 32.. 43. 16. 45. 6.... 89 fear 1...... 118 acute pain......... 30.......net i ... 126 adrenalin .... 32......... 19. 98.. 102. 36... 5.. 57..... 27.. 81... 81... 37... 112.... 46.......... 95 © Copyright 2003. 103. 96.58 choice2..... 37...... 74..... 32.. 6............ 4.......... 3 Alzheimer’s . 79..... 36.. 78....... 114...... 91.. 76....... Ph...................... 37........ 36.... 98....... 4..8 Adrian Calabrese........ 43.. 106. 3. 76 desire......... 67..... 2.... 28. 73 depression . 46. 103.. 63.. 78 chronic pain .. 32... 94.. 129 alcoholism... 41....... 31.. 87.. 6. 35.......... 32.... 131 dreams 22... 36.. 45........... 63... 9..... 44. 55. 96... 77...... 38. 97....... 21... 88... 26....... 24. 77......................86 Circle Therapy ... 24 eating disorders.. 119 confidence.....D. 39... 78 cortisol . 99.. 95...... 47.. 44................... 19....2. 46. 5. .... 42... 27. 54. 58.... 44..... 129 food addictions..D.. 60...............121 blood sugar ... 94.. 78.2.. 14... 2......... 94... 106... 35........ 127... 89.1...1.... 118 consciousness 8... 43. 57.. 78 alternative programs ... 53. 35..... 102................... 122 chronic anger . 62..... 72........... 35. 35...... 130 focus.......... 74.... 6..... 121. 71...... 97... 43.... 21... 88... 72.... 52. 129.. 5. 25.54 association . 73.................. 23. 126...... 78........... 23.. Ph. 26. 22....... 110........... 37...... 56.... 42....... 76. 45. 126. 125..... 54.. 101.... 55 emotional freedom technique .... 74...... 104. 4...... 84.... 94 baggage....... ..
22. 83 Robert Dilts..net ii ....7. 57 neural interconnections ....... 78... 47... 118 Gary Craig .... 83....................... 83 Roger Callahan .. 33....40........ 106 Mount Sinai School of Medicine ... 54... 78 NLP. 107.......... 88.... 118...... 47... 19.... 10..........2.... 59........ 10... 86...... 59. 54................... 79.... 116 happiness .. 117.. 108 Parkinson’s disease........ 10.. 119...... 109... 37....... 47....... 58....35 goal ... 38....... 122 Harvard .. 53. 81. 118........... 47... 95. 42.9. 99....83 Law of Attraction..... 30.... 57.... 130 Judith DeLozier ............... 130 snapshot exercise © Copyright 2003................. 36 Guilt .. 103... 45.......... 67.. 120 relaxation ...... 77. 63........ 37.... 53. 32.. 58......8 hypnosis .. 129 heart disease... 39... 9............. 47...... 13.. 32....... 43... 56. 119 neuro-linguistic programming ... 6... 109. 37....37. 37. 43...... 110... 37.......... 21.............. 122..... 22.. 7... 8...... 36... 22. 60... 59. 50.. 120... 77........ 77........... 59....... 77. 122 Ida Kendall . 50... 115 smoking............. 64....... 56 hurt... 56... 125 immune suppression ... 83 nitric oxide .......... 107 healing ....... 92.......... 42. 28...... 2. 84.. 43. 1.10. 5.. 101...... 6... NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att..... 79...... 114... 93............ 27....12 habit .. 64................ 119....... 58... 54..... 43..76 Hridaya Yoga..... 6 Pat Dennis. 30 passive-aggressive .. 23... 9....... 47.. 127 hypersuggestible ......... 14........ 37........ 89........ 127.. 49....... 109....... 37. 113......... 128 Richard Bandler ........ 56...... 105. 71 life force... 27....... 89 phobias........32 hypnotherapy . 89. 74... 67... 8....... 69. 36... 129 resentment. 120............ 16.............. 52... 21... 35.... 58...... 76.. 77........ 93 message units .. 66... 54........ 86..... 15..... 53.... 32.......10..5.... 58. 115.............. 84 panic attacks....... 39... 78... 94. 107. 59.. 78.... 56.................. 79.... 125 Hypnosis Motivation Institute .. 118 self-talk ........ 94.... 77..... 44.. 56. 58..... 57.... 76... 37 self-esteem .... 5.... 43..................... 53... Woods . 39...... 22. 35 Ryke Geerd Hamer ... 17 Janet Luhrs..................................... 79....... 21.. 58.. 22... 118.... 115..... 57. 114 imagery ....9.. 113... 122 Quantum 90 quit smoking ...............7... 78......... 5.. 78.... 46. 79.. 89.. 87. 78.. 29 neuro pathways .. 57.... 51. 76.......... 117 medicine..... 103. 107. 6.. 10..... 121 relationships24... 3......... 25.. 94 mood swings .... 6........ 86......... 28..... 57.. 44... 101 self-image .84 Jill Ammon-Wexler ........................54 Irina Wardas .. 79. 40..24 Journal of Clinical Psychology....... 34... 123................................ 35..... 6... 102.... 63.. 85............. 129 grief..... 112. 46...28 John Grinder .... 29.... 30...... 7. 78....... 87 lose weight 4.. 53.....8.. 78... 21............ 105 Jane C. 77.......fulfillment .............. 29..... 78..... 60....... 125....... 101.......... 34... 109. 125 men . 54............ 65.......30 high blood pressure. 37 powerless .. 55...83 John Kappas.. 26......... 110........ 79... 43. 5....24. 65... 78 International Journal of Clinical and Experimental Hypnosis..... 121 snapshot .... 87... 10..... 37... 99. 53..36 joy ........ 75....... 116.... 32.. 4. 7... 6...1........... 111. 127. 38..... 88..........11.10.. 30...... 77.. 26.. 77....... 57................... 35.......... 86 habits. 113 prosperity ........ 83 overload ... 77. 32 phobia . 42....... 78 Scientific Review of Mental Health practice........... 31...5... 128.... 67... 13.. 15...............32 illness 36....................... 95.... 38. 58..... 87...3.............. 110.... 30.
. 110 Two Futures ... 26...... 114 visualization..... 6.. 2............... 6.......net iii ......... 77..... 36.............. 37... 58................ 118.............. 113.. 120 yummy list ... 37.... 7..... 109...5............ 91............. 128 subconsciously............ 85......53 transformation................... 111 victimhood ..... 77..... 37....... 84............................. 29... 56.... 44..................... 77. 47. 75.. 78... 109 triggers ................. 34.....6.... 78.......... 77....... 48.Stephen Gilligan . NewBeginnings newhypnotherapy@att...... 43.. 124 © Copyright 2003... 125. 65................ 60.. 47......44.... 114 triggering event . 10..... 30. 80.. 101.......... 5.. 59.............. 79 thought habits ..... 122 zeal. 22....... 114 weight ...... 57........57 stress hormones ........... 6.....107 trigger......... 122.28 Trance & Treatment: Clinical Uses of Hypnosis ..... 78 subconscious......4..... 116 Women.............. 45.... 115... 95.......... 95.. 5........... 30..... 7....... 106 wounds ....... 59...83 Stephen Kosslyn . 109.. 21........... 112........ 107............. 38........... 46.. 34.................. 39.................... 120 suicide........... 85... 121 value areas of life. 8... 94...... 79....
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