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ADVENTURE TIME WITH FINN AND JAKE PUBERTY by Edwin Li

www.edwinlicomedy.com Edwinlicomedy@gmail.com

EXT: VILLAGE - DAY Finn, 14 year old human, and Jake, the magical shape shifting dog, go to town, eating FRIED HOG ON A STICK. FINN Do you think she’ll like this? Finn points to a sword. JAKE Nope. Princess Bubblegum doesn’t need a sword. FINN Her birthday’s tomorrow and I don’t want to buy her something stupid. Finn takes out the invitation. INSERT INVITATION: Princess Bubblegum, big smile, holds a decapitated monsterhead with a speech bubble next to her. TEXT Come to the party for Candy Worms and Drinks! Jake takes a bite out of the HOG STICK FINN You can tell its high class. I mean look at the artistry. JAKE (pointing) What is this called again? FINN Deep fried Jake, deep fried. Finn and Jake walk pass shops, a shoeshine stand, a magazine rack, and an outdoor BARBER. Finn and Jake walk pass the ICE KING getting a shave! FINN AND JAKE (shock) WHAT! The Ice King turns his head, while the barber trims his beard. Hello. ICE KING

FINN What are you doing here-

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JAKE (COND’T) (Interrupting) Prepare to die! Explosion ORB activate! Jake pulls out an orb; it’s starts BEEPING – 3, 2, 1… Nothing happens. The Ice King has no reaction. JAKE (CONT'D) Aww man. My orb is broken. ICE KING If you must know, I got invited to the Royal Party and would like to get ready. FINN That’s a lie. She would never invite you! Finn takes out his sword, ready to slice. ICE KING What’s that on your head? The Ice King points to Finn’s head. FINN What’s what? ICE KING That thing on your forehead. FINN Oh I’m not falling for that one. ICE KING No I’m serious. FINN If this is some type of trick Ice King I’ll send you down to the Lava Pits of Goldenhar. Finn looks into the mirror to see a BUMP on his forehead. Jake farts. JAKE (COND’T) Sorry, hog stick. Looks like a zit.

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FINN A zit? Blerg! Are you sure it’s not a demon trying to rip out of my head? JAKE That’s a little extreme bro. FINN I’m going to pop it. Finn squeezes the zit. JAKE Are you crazy man! Don’t do it! Why? FINN

JAKE Because it could lead to more zits. FINN But I look so stupid! Ahhhh. ICE KING Hey! I know something that will help - DARKNESS FACE CREAM. Got rid my zits (snap) just like that. JAKE I’ve heard about this. The cream is endorsed by all the celebrities like the hit boy band SINGLE LOCATION. FINN Single Location! I love those guys but why would I want any help from you? ICE KING Well the Princes will be there and you can’t go to the party with that ugly old zit on your face. JAKE Humm… he’s right you know. Finn’s face looks busted. (to the Ice King) But still - why did the Princess invite you. The Barber scrapes the shaving blade SLOWLY up the Ice King’s neck; he does not respond to Jake’s question.

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ICE KING (beat) The cream is located in a dangerous place - the UNDER UNDERWORLD. JAKE The Under Underworld! That’s the underworld under the underworld. FINN It’s like looking under a carpet and finding another CARPET! Alright, Ice King we are going to get this Darkness Cream but if you’re up to something I know your Barber. Lets go! Finn and Jake run off. ICE KING (evil laugh) Yes… hahaha! CUT TO: MAIN TITLE EXT: UNDERWORLD 1 – DAY Finn and Jake climb down a rope into the first Underworld, while singing a song. FINN & JAKE (singing) Adventure is great. It so freaking awesome I love it so much. Bang, Pow, Bomb. Whoa Whoa. I don’t want to go on an Adventure. No. No. No! What else am I suppose to do? Life will suck! FINN Great song Jake, we should make an album together. Yeah man. JAKE

FINN Yeah right after our Finn’s voice suddenly changes to a deep BARRY WHITE MONSTER voice. (His voice goes in and out during the rest of the show)

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FINN (CONT'D) (monster voice) - adventure. What the heck? My voice! JAKE Looks like someone’s going through puberty. FINN Feels like a monsters inside of me. SCISSOR BATS, body of a bat, wings of a scissor, with muscular arms, SWOOPS in. JAKE Speaking of monsters! Watch out! The Scissor Bat cuts the rope and our heroes fall to the ground. SCISSOR BAT I knew this would be lot more fun than going to THE BOUNCE HOUSE OF SADNESS. CUT TO: INT: BOUNCE HOUSE OF SADNESS - DAY A group of unhappy teenage demons bouncing up and down. whatever… UNHAPPY DEMON BACK TO PRESENT Finn and Jake fall down a deep dark cave next to a pile of ROCKS. Ahhhh! FINN AND JAKE

They land and the Scissor Bat comes back to finish them off. Finn takes out his sword FINN Time to turn you into SAFETY SCISSORS! Ahhh! Swords clash with the Scissor bat’s wings. Finn swipes the Bat with his sword without success. The Scissor Bat PUNCHES Finn in the face repeatedly. FINN (CONT'D) I’m all Jacked up man. Help me out.

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As Finn is beaten to a bloody pulp, Jake tires to come up with an idea. JAKE Hey Finn hold him off while I think of something. With his back turned, Jake continues to think. The Scissor Bat smashes Finn from behind. JAKE (CONT’D) Humm… what should I do? FINN (o.s) Awww help me bro! Help me! I got it. JAKE

Jake starts fling ROCKS like a machine gun. The Bat takes on several to the face, until finally the rocks break one of the Scissor Wings and the monster goes DOWN. JAKE (CONT'D) Take that! And That. FINN Great job Jake! You did it. SCISSOR BAT Not cool bra! The Scissor Bat dies. Finn uses his sword and rips out a good SCISSOR WING. FINN Yes! This might be useful. Finn puts the Scissor Wing in his backpack. Now what? JAKE

FINN Look over there! What? JAKE

Finn points to a sign that reads UNDER UNDERWORLD THIS WAY. The sign leads into a dark tunnel made of ROCKS. FINN That was convenient. Our heroes move forward into the darkness.

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EXT: ROCK TUNNEL - NIGHT Finn and Jake stop at a sign located next to a huge pile of ROCKS that reads: UNDER UNDERWORLD located beneath pile. Finn tires to push the pile away. His face starts to drip grease as he struggles. FINN Agghh! It won’t move. Lets try punching it! Finn and Jake pound the rocks with their fist but it still won’t move. FINN (CONT’D) My fist! They’re all jellybean shape. JAKE No need to curse Finn. Step back I know exactly what to do. Jake takes out an EXPLOSION ORB. JAKE (CONT’D) So I did a little tweaking and this should work. Explosion Orb activate! Finn and Jake run off screen. The orb starts to beep; 3,2,1 Nothing happens. FINN Aww man there’s no way I can get the cream now. I’ll be stuck like this forever! Finn puts his head down. Oil from Finn’s face drips onto the ground. Jake comes over to comfort him. JAKE Hey buddy. You ok? Whoa! Jake slips on the oil and gets back up. FINN I don’t understand what’s happening to me. One minute I’m happy, and the next, I feel angry! I can’t even control the oil dripping from my face. That’s it I’m going to pop this thing. Finn squeezes his zit with his fingers.

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JAKE No. Don’t do it. FINN I’m going to do it Jake, I’m going to do it. JAKE Don’t do it man. FINN I’m doing it. I’m doing it. Finn starts to sniffle. JAKE Finn I’m sorry that you’re feeling this way. But that’s part of growing up and it will pass. FINN Really Jake? JAKE Yeah, once you get over puberty you’ll become a stronger person. FINN What if I don’t want to grow up? JAKE All heroes grow up. Really? Yep. FINN JAKE

FINN Well...if that’s what it takes to be a hero! Then I’m doing it. Thanks Jake you’re the best friend I can ever have. (beat) I got an idea! CROSS FADE TO Jake expands his body until he wraps the entire pile of ROCKS. FINN Ok Jake. Are you gripping the entire pile?

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Yes!

JAKE

FINN Now roll over! Jake curries the rocks with him as he rolls over, revealing a trap door. FINN (CONT'D) Come on lets go! Finn and Jake open the door and walk down a dark tunnel. INT: UNDER UNDERWORLD Our heroes enter a pitch-black room and we only see the white of their eyes. JAKE This is scary. FINN (deep voice) Yeah I know. JAKE Your not helping. FART FINN AND JAKE (simultaneously) That was you. A creature SLITHERS around them. FINN (normal voice) Is someone down here? No… CREATURE (CONT’D)

JAKE But that doesn’t make any sense. By replying to my question you just imply that someone IS down here. CREATURE Huh? Ahh… You’re confusing me. (hissing) Blah, I’m going to eat you! More snake noise.

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JAKE Help! Finn I can’t move. FINN Oh man. I can’t see anything. Where are you? JAKE I’m right here! Follow my voice dude. Where? FINN

JAKE Right here! FINN Oh there you are. JAKE I think your butt is in my face! FINN No its not. Oh wait - sorry. Finn! JAKE

JAKE I’m just going to take some grease from your face and. Jake lights a fire. Now they are able to see the monster, which looks like a SNAKE but with HUGE BICEPS. Jake and Finn both scream. Finn uses the grease to help Jake slide out. FINN Alright! Darkness Cream here I come! Finn takes his sword and slashes the monster but the sword breaks in half. Huh? FINN

CREATURE So it’s the Darkness Cream you want? You can have it but only by beating me in a game older than time itself! FINN Dude, what is up with all these obstacles man? Ok what’s the game?

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CREATURE Rock, Paper, Scissors That’s it? FINN

JAKE Haha. I thought it’d be dangerous. Hahaha. CREATURE Loser dies! Hahaha! (beat) Two out of 3 dorks! Finn and the Creature play by the fire stick. FINN AND CREATURE After 3 they both open their fist - Finn has SCISSOR; the Creature has ROCK. CREATURE (evil laugh) Haha! One more and your dead! FINN AND CREATURE Finn has ROCK; the Creature has SCISSOR FINN (deep voice) Don’t count me out yet buddy! Things get tense. Everything slows down. They open their fist – tied; both paper. They open their fist – tied; both rock. They open their fist – the Creature has ROCK. Finn has PAPER! No!!!! CREATURE

The Creature melts into a container of Darkness Cream. JAKE Way to go! Woot woot! FINN (deep voice) Now its time to finish this! Finn wipes the cream on his zit - it shrinks immediately.

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FINN (normal voice) I’m back to normal! Now lets go to the party. EXT. OUTDOOR PARK – DAY Finn and Jake arrive at Princes Bubblegum’s out door birthday party. The Ice King is also there, with a clean shave. He almost looks normal with his back straight. What the? Hi guys! FINN ICE KING

FINN But you look like a normal person. ICE KING I know right? The Ice King starts to dance. The Princess enters. PRINCES BUBBLEGUM Hello Finn! Welcome to the party! FINN Hi Princess. Are those candy worms? Finn walks up to a TABLE of CANDY WORMS but before he can even put them in his mouth, the zit suddenly grows back. What? FINN (COND’T)

It continues to grow. It grows so big that Finn can’t even support the weight of it. FINN What should I do? PRINCES BUBBLEGUM Just pop it! FINN I’m out of options man! Jake! Take the scissor from my backpack. Jake takes the scissor from Finn’s backpack and pops the zit. BOOM! A roaring DEMON emerges from Finn’s forehead, dripping with oil.

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JAKE Oh, so it was a Demon. The Demon rampages through the party, destroying everything. The Ice King starts laughing as he put on a fake beard with strings attached, returning to his evil self. ICE KING (COND’T) REVENGE! Woot woot! JAKE You won’t survive my Explosion Orb. Ahh what’s the point. It doesn’t even work. Jake throws the Orb into the Demons butt - it gets stuck. The Demon continues to destroy the party and eating the guests. Finn gets up with an enormous EXIT WOUND in his head. FINN How are we going to kill him? DEMON The only way to defeat me is if you beat me at a game of Rock, Paper Sices... Hey candy worms! The Demon calmly sits down to eat candy worms with the other guest. Finn and Jake are unsure what to do. JAKE …So I guess we won. FINN I guess so. JAKE Doesn’t feel like it. ICE KING Wait, huh? Why aren’t you killing? The Ice King starts kicking the Demon with little effect. ICE KING (CONT’D) Murder and destroy you stupid thing. The Demon grabs the Ice King and flings him back to the Ice Kingdom. ICE KING (CONT'D) Ahhhhhhhhh! The Demon goes back to eating candy worms and make small talk with the guest around him.

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DEMON Nice day for a party huh? I like your shirt. GUEST Oh thank you. DEMON Do you like jokes? Oh yes. GUEST

DEMON What do you call a guy who likes sneakers and Japanese food? A shoeshi lover. Hahaha! GUEST

The Demon breaks the tension and becomes the life of the party. Suddenly, the Explosion Orb goes off - BOOM! Demon body parts fall from the sky like acid rain. FADE TO BLACK. THE END.